Ad Newspaper for Kirkby in Ashfield, Mansfield, Nottingham March 2018

March 2018

Issue No. 150

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Call us to advertise or contribute - email editor@adnewspaper.co.uk or call 0115 822 4995.

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The Kirkby and Annesley Ad - Local News and Trusted Traders delivered to your letterbox every month

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Crufts 11th - 18th March The world’s biggest dog show is back this month. Here are some facts about our favourite canine competition.

Charles Cruft was a dog-biscuit salesman!

It was originally just for terriers. The inaugural event was billed as the “First Great Terrier Show”. Five years later it was renamed “Cruft’s Greatest Dog Show” and opened to all breeds.

Queen Victoria’s collie Darnley II, and two of her Pomeranians won prizes in 1891.

In 1991, Crufts was officially recognised by the Guinness Book of Records as the world’s largest dog show.

Look After Your Tools

There has even been a murder.

In 1974 an Old Bailey jury heard how a man began an affair with a woman he met at Crufts, then was stabbed to death by his wife with the knife he used to cut up their dog’s food.

Statistically, the most likely breed to win the Best in Show crown is the Cocker Spaniel which has won ‘Best in Show’ seven times Don’t own pedigree? In 2000, the Kennel Club started Scruffts – a show for crossbreeds, which compete for the titles of Most Handsome Dog, Prettiest Bitch, Child’s Best Friend and Golden Oldie.

As spring begins it’s time to take stock of our garden tools. Ideally these should have been cleaned, sharpened, polished and carefully stored at the start of winter. If they were you can pat yourself on the back and skip this month’s advice.

Still with us? Oh dear, then you need some help. Tools which are badly stored may develop all manner of problems during their enforced rest period.

First check electric power tools. Are the plugs and flexes in good, safe working order? If not, have them professionally repaired or replaced.

If your mower is petrol-driven the spark-plugs should have been disconnected when the mowing season finished. If it takes unleaded petrol, then this loses ignition quality over time so ideally should have been siphoned off or run down at that point too.

Over the years there have been scandals worthy of an Agatha Christie plot.

There have been claims of owners slipping rival dogs laxatives, poisoning them or sticking chewing gum in their fur.

If you didn’t do this, then you’ll need to check the spark plugs and fuel, but before you do that, use a stiff brush to remove all the dust and old grass.

You will then need to apply some grease to the height adjusters, turning them to work it through preventing them from seizing-up.

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Take a good look at your hand tools.

Are shovels, forks and trowels looking sharp and clean? Most of us don’t care enough for these hard-working implements and then wonder why they don’t work well.

Find a large bucket and fill it with about 2.5 kilos of rough builders’ sand and a litre of general purpose oil. Mix it all together until the sand is thoroughly moist.

Clean off any dust, then spray the metal surfaces of the tools with some general purpose oil. Turn the tool on so that the oil is worked into all those hard-to-reach areas.

Now 27,000 dogs take part each year, with 160,000 human visitors attending.

Around 350kg (or 55st) of canine fur will be cleared from the Birmingham NEC following the show!

Electric mowers should have their cable checked, their plastic cover checked, and then be up-ended and any caked grass or dirt cleaned off with a stiff brush. Sharpen or replace the blades.

Clean any dried-on soil or rust off the tools using a stiff wire brush, then plunge them into the oily sand and leave them for a day or two. Remove and rub them with a rough cloth.

Finally, sharpen the cutting edges with a fine metal file or sharpening stone. Some DIY stores offer this service if you don’t feel confident yourself.

Bare wooden handles can be returned to smoothness if you give them a good rub with linseed oil.

They’ll be much more comfortable on your hands if you do this.

Finally, remember...all of this should have been done before the winter.

With this new-found knowledge we can be better prepared in 2019

Check the throttle and clutch cables for wear and tear, and oil them, then clean any dust and dry grass out of the air filter. Check the blades, if they are very blunt or damaged, they will need to be replaced or sharpened professionally.

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St David’s Day

Support Your Local Butcher Once every high street boasted a butcher or two, then along came giant supermarkets and things changed.

March 1st St David is the patron saint of Wales and bizarrely also the patron saint of doves (who knew?).

In the early 1990s the number of butchers in Britain was 15000; by the millennium there were just 6000.

In Welsh he is Dewi Sant.

He was born around 500AD and his parents were a Prince, and the daughter of a Chieftain.

But in the past few years things have been looking up for butchery.

Consumers are demanding more locally sourced and sustainable meat.

He was recognised as a national patron saint at the height of Welsh resistance to the Normans.

living on a diet of bread, vegetables, water and milk.

At one monastery however the life of austerity was so unpopular that the monks attempted to poison David.

David is said to have cured his tutor Paulinus of blindness, by making the sign of the cross.

The story goes that David ate the poisoned bread after blessing it, and thus came to no harm.

Realising that his protégé was blessed, Paulinus sent him off as a missionary to convert the pagan people of Britain.

He is also know for founding 12 monasteries during his lifetime.

The Meat Trades journal - which organises National Butchers’ Week reports that an “overwhelming number” of people in the UK would prefer to buy from a butcher than a supermarket.

Because it was often a family business, lots of butchers can trace their origins back generations. These businesses take great pride in their work.

A good butcher will be able to advise on portion size and cooking methods, and will do some or all of the meat preparation for you.

By Sarah Davey

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When Jamie Oliver praises the thrifty tastiness of brisket, viewers are quick to follow his advice and head to their local butcher.

It might be a little early in the year to bust out the BBQ but a nice slow-cooked brisket could be the perfect supper dish for a chilly March evening.

In his final sermon he asked his monks to ‘do the little things you’ve seen me doing.’

These monasteries were known for their extreme asceticism, where monks abstained from worldly pleasures,

01773 713484

One of the main influences though has been the rise in cookery programmes.

We are becoming a nation of cooks.

His best know miracle was raising a hill that he was standing on to deliver a sermon when people at the back couldn’t hear.

He became a priest and is remembered for helping to spread christianity across the continent.

154 Nottingham Rd. Eastwood NG16 3GG

The horsemeat scandal a few years ago also gave the industry a boost as consumers became more wary about processed food.

Celebrity chefs urge shoppers to try unusual cuts of locally sourced meat and this has prompted a boom for traditional high street butchers.

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A Good Read Very often associated with Biblical times, it may be shocking to people to learn that in Europe as recently as 1957, victims of this disease were sent into isolation.

And how her family’s past is forever linked to this place where the shunned inhabitants tried to maintain some level of normalcy amidst their pain and isolation.

The last known leper colony in Europe was the island of Spinalonga off the coast of Crete. This is the island of the novel’s title.

In a culture where family is everything, how can a family continue when it is ripped apart?

Alexis Fielding is a 25-year-old living in London who knows very little about her background other than the fact that her mother comes from Crete. For whatever reason her mother refuses to discuss her past.

Frustrated by her silence, Alexis decides to take her own journey to her mother’s home village, Plaka, to discover the truth that her mother will not speak of.

The Island

by Victoria Hislop It is books like this that remind you, in small ways, how fortunate we are to live in the 21st century when illnesses and diseases that were once considered a death sentence are now curable.

One such disease is leprosy which provides the background for this debut novel.

Through an old family friend, in the heat of the Cretan sun, Alexis learns of her family history. Of her great grandmother, Eleni, and her two daughters, Maria and Anna.

More crucially she learns of the sad past of the now deserted island, just 1km from Plaka.

The Monster of Shiversands Cove

by Emma Fischel

One night he decides he has had enough. Magnus will not stop talking about the fairy he caught and has called Harry. In a moment of anger, he agrees with Magnus that this may be a hot spot for fairies and elves, but that means it is also a hot spot for monsters!

Magnus is terrified but of course he has no real need to be. Everyone knows that monsters aren’t real. Or are they?

By Willow Coby

Ah, a summer holiday by the beach!

Hot days playing in the sand. Days full of digging and snorkelling. Sounds like bliss! At least it DID. Stan is fed up. For the last four years his family have holidayed with his best friend, Rory’s, family. And this year was supposed to be the same until Rory’s parents both got new jobs and moved away.

Now he is stuck in a cottage by the sea with Magnus, his four-year-old brother who is insistent that he is going to spend the whole holiday searching for fairies. Of course, Stan knows that this is nonsense and that fairies don’t even exist.

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Garden View This month the days get longer and the sun gets stronger...we hope!

live happy!

vegetable and fruit yields.

However March is famously temperamental and if the soil where you are is still wet and cold then it’s wise to delay planting and sowing until the temperature rises.

Plant nutrient reserves are low at this time of year so, as the soil warms up, it’s time to think about fertiliser.

Many gardeners are a bit frightened of fertiliser.

All those chemical symbols on the side of the packet are rather reminiscent of school chemistry lessons. In fact the basics are quite simple.

NPK - This can be observed on the side of most fertiliser packages. The letters stand for: N - Nitrogen P - Phosphorous K - Potassium Together these are known as the macro-nutrients and each of them has its own use.

Nitrogen primarily feeds the leafy above-the-ground parts of the plants.

Phosphorous promotes strong roots.

Potassium makes grass hardier, promotes germination and improves

The proportions of each macro-nutrient will be printed on the packet. Equal amounts of each nutrient make for a good general purpose fertiliser.

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A lawn will need a good balance of nitrogen and phosphorus to guarantee lush green grass with a healthy root system capable of withstanding dry spells. Fruiting plants need higher proportions of potassium.

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There are other macro-nutrients: Carbon, Hydrogen and Oxygen, which plants obtain freely from the air and water; and calcium, magnesium and sulphur, which should be present in any good general purpose fertiliser.

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Plants also need micro-nutrients: Iron, Manganese, Zinc, Boron and Molybdenum.

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Plants take all these nutrients and build everything they need from scratch, including vitamins.

What plants cannot do is absorb vitamins directly from things such as pet food, milk or so-called fertilisers which contain vitamins, proteins and fats.

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National Apprenticeship Week

March 5th-9th

Are you taking your GCSEs or A levels this year? Have you decided what to do afterwards? Many schools champion university or further education colleges but have you considered an apprenticeship?

The 11th National Apprenticeship Week runs from 5th to 9th March 2018.

During the week employers and apprentices from across England will come together to celebrate the success of apprenticeships whilst encouraging even more people to choose apprenticeships as a pathway to a great career.

An apprenticeship is a chance to earn and learn. It allows you to mix working full-time and learning on the job with gaining a qualification. Anyone over 16 can be an apprentice.

Courses last at least a year, and are available in a huge range of industries – there are apprenticeships in everything from accountancy to social media.

It’s not just small companies who offer

them; many of the big players such as Google, IBM, Barclays and Nestle offer excellent apprenticeships with good long-term prospects.

In terms of learning styles, apprenticeships are best-suited to those people who want to get into the workplace straight away, or those who prefer a hands-on approach to learning.

Some people (some teachers even) worry that an apprenticeship might limit a more able student’s options.

This isn’t the case at all, if anything it opens them up. Thanks to the in-depth industry experience apprenticeships provide, many apprentices progress further and faster in their chosen fields.

work. These skills are transferrable whatever path your career ultimately takes.

you need to do your research. Think about what your career ambitions are and look at potential pathways.

One major benefit of an apprenticeship is that you won’t have a student loan to pay off, and on top of this you are earning a salary and building a network of contacts.

Talk to employers at careers fairs and ask what they are looking for, and talk to people who have done an apprenticeship.

About 70% of apprentices are offered a permanent position at the end of their apprenticeship, and 90% remain in employment.

To decide whether or not an apprenticeship is right in your case

Apprenticeships are not right for everyone but they shouldn’t be viewed as a lesser option. Modern apprenticeships are a dynamic, flexible way to launch a career and one might be perfect for you.

By Tracey Anderson.

There are also higher-level apprenticeships and some people choose to move into further education at a later stage, either at a conventional university or through a body like the Open University.

Spending time in workplace as part of your apprenticeship means that you naturally develop important ‘soft skills’, such as communication and team

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Wedding Photographers After you’ve set the date and booked your venue, your choice of photographer is probably one of the most important decisions to make about your wedding. Your photos will shape your memories for years to come, and it’s crucial that they capture the atmosphere of your special day.

Photography is also likely to be one of the biggest costs of your wedding – another reason to get it just right.

To give yourself the widest choice, start researching photographers as soon as you can. Visit wedding fairs, look at websites such as www. findaweddingphotographer.co.uk for ideas, and ask friends and family for recommendations. Your venue may also be able to make suggestions.

Before you meet potential photographers, think carefully about what you want from them. Most will offer prices based on how many venues you need them to attend, how long they stay with you, how many photos they take and how many you have printed.

Get together a list of shots that you’d like to have taken. Your photographer will tell you the traditional groups, but you may want different combinations, family portraits, or pictures of friends visiting from abroad for example.

Look at as much of their work as you can, and if possible ask to see one couple’s full album to see the story it tells, rather than a random selection of the photographer’s best shots.

You will need to decide whether you prefer traditional photographs, or a more informal style, or perhaps a mixture of both. Also consider if you like colour, black and white, sepia or other effects that may be available.

Look carefully at a variety of shots. In the big groups, is everyone looking at the camera? Do the happy couple look relaxed? Do you like the poses and backgrounds used? Can you see the detail in the dress, flowers and cake? How have they coped with bad weather?

It’s very important to find out if photographers have wedding indemnity insurance to cover the cost of retaking your photos if something goes wrong. If not, you will need to take out your own insurance.

Finally, you should think about how you want your photos to be displayed.

An album is traditional, but digital versions on a website are easy to show to friends and family.

Talk through different options with your photographer to make sure what they are offering is right for you.

When you have a shortlist of photographers, arrange to meet each one in person so you can see their work and get an idea of their personality.

You need someone who can get everyone organised, but they must also make you feel at ease.

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tive spirit than with Ballet Theatre UK’s The Nutcracker on Sunday 19 November.

Care Homes How to choose the right one Care of the elderly is an emotive subject. Whether you are choosing a care home for yourself, or searching on behalf of an elderly relative, you want to make sure you get it right.

First you need to decide on the level of care required.

Residential homes are for people who can no longer cope with daily activities in their home. They may also need help washing, bathing, dressing and going to the toilet.

Nursing homes are for those people who require regular nursing care, by or under the supervision of a qualified nurse. Residents tend to have no mobility or severely limited mobility, mental confusion, and may be faecally incontinent.

As with any home, location is important. You may want to choose a place where family or friends can visit regularly?

Once a location has been decided on, select as many care homes as you can and visit every one of them.

The Care Quality Commission (www. cqc.org.uk) have over 18000 care homes registered with them and publish all their inspection reports online, so this is a good place to start.

When you visit, what are your first impressions? Is the place bright and clean, comfortable, welcoming and airy? Did the receptionist make eye contact and smile? Were you offered a cup of tea while you waited?

What are the noise levels like? Are there any unpleasant odours? Look at the residents and chat to them if you can. Do they look clean, well-cared for and happy?

Monitor how much interaction there is between the staff and the residents. Is there lots of friendly chatter? Check to see if call lights over doors are on and being left unanswered. This might indicate staffing problems.

Check the floor, especially in corners and under beds. This is a good indicator of whether standards of hygiene and care are high throughout.

Four family shows are on offer in the coming season, starting with a double bill of The Sooty Show on Sunday 9 October. Older children will enjoy booing and cheering at - 100’s of designs Free design & quote American Wrestling -on Sunday 22 October, 10 year guarantee - Family businessfor over in 20 yrs with the whole family catered Cirque - Honest pricing policy - All made in-house Enchantment on Thursday 26 October. This - Fit within 3 weeks of order concert style cirque production stun- Installation withinfeatures 1 day Book your free design visit now ning choreography, breathtaking live vocals performers with a and mesmerising circus 0115 975 6633 wardrobesonline.co.uk soundtrack of current pop, rock and classical music.

Sliding Door Wardrobes & Bedroom Furniture Sing-a-Long-a Productions invited Mansfield Factory showroom: Southglade Business Park, off Hucknall 9RA they Palace Theatre to ‘BeRoad, ourNottingham Guest’NG5 when chose the venue as one of the first in the country to present Beauty and the Beast on Tuesday 24 October. Disney’s recent smashhit film will be shown on a giant screen, whilst the audience becomes the star of the show using on-screen lyrics and their props goodie bag!

When you’ve reached a decision, take good financial and legal advice.

What are the fees and what do they include? Can you afford them on a long-term basis? What happens if funds dry up? What is the protocol for making a complaint? Consult the Office of Fair Trading ‘Fair Terms for Care’ booklet to see whether the contract you’ll be asked to sign is a fair one.

Ask as many questions as you can Two other excellent sources of up front, and you will help ensure that information are the websites www.

• yourcarehome.co.uk Mercury – Queen and tribute on Fridayany 20 move youThere or youriselderly plentyrelative of music to reminisce to www.

October carehomesupport.co.uk. makes will bescheduled the right one . before the end of the year, includis good, but there is no tribute on • Groundwork King of Pop – Michael Jackson ing Blidworth Welfare Band and Mansfield substitute for visiting and Saturday 21 October and District Male Voice Choir’s Thank You assessing the standard of • service Some Guys have all the Luck – Rod yourself. for the Music 3 show on Sunday 24

Stewart tribute on Friday 27 October inspection • Begin Maccayour – Paul McCartney tribute on Friday by ringing to arrange 17appointments November to visit the premises. yourself if the tribute on • Starman Ask – David Bowie phone was answered in Saturday 18 November a friendly way. Did the person • answering Holly at Christmas – Buddy Holly tribute the phone sound stressed or abrupt? on Thursday 23 November

September, with special guests St Peter’s School Choir. Shortly afterwards, The Moonlight Serenade Orchestra with The Andrews Sisters UK take to the Palace Theatre stage on Wednesday 11 October, plus Neil Sands and his West End cast bring

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As always, the season ends with a festive feast fit for the whole family. This year’s pantomime stars Australian Mark Little in the ironically giant tale of Jack and the Beanstalk.

Mark – who is most well-known for his role as Joe Mangel in Neighbours – will be playing the character you love to hate, Fleshcreep: “I like playing the baddy but will be more nutty than scary. I want the kids to have banter with me without being terrified!”

The show really will be bigger and better than ever with the introduction of 3D effects to the performances, so who knows, maybe the baddie really will be ‘behind you!’

For more information on times, prices and durations of shows, or to see which shows are already on sale in 2018 and beyond, please call Box Office on 01623 633133 or visit www.mansfieldpalace.co.uk

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11

Boiled Fruit Cake Fruit cakes don’t have to be tricky. You may be thinking that you need to be a Mary Berry or Julia Childs to make a good fruit cake.

But this one is simple. And you only need to use a teacup for measuring.

Ingredients 1 cup of water 225g / 8oz unsalted butter 1 cup of soft brown sugar ½ cup peel (if you don’t like peel, use chopped ready-to-eat dried apricots) 1 ½ cups raisins 1 ½ cups sultanas ¼ cup chopped glace cherries 1 tsp mixed spice

Reduce the heat and simmer gently for 20 minutes, then set aside to cool.

Heat the oven to 180C/fan 160C/gas 4.

Line a deep 20cm/8inch circular cake tin with greaseproof paper.

Mix the beaten eggs well into the fruit mix. It’s important that the mixture has cooled because if it’s too warm the eggs will cook!

Then sieve the flour and baking soda into the mixture and mix well.

Pour into the cake tin and bake for 1-1½ hours until cooked through (when a skewer inserted into the cake comes out clean).

If the cake is browning too quickly reduce the temperature a little.

2 cups plain flour 1 tsp baking soda (bicarbonate of soda) 2 eggs Method Place the first eight ingredients into a large saucepan and bring it to the boil.

Mother’s Day Pain

Remove from the oven and allow to cool in the tin for fifteen minutes, then turn out on to a rack.

The cake keeps really well if it’s stored in an airtight tin.

My mother left home when I was seven. It always struck me as particularly cruel that teachers insisted we made Mother’s Day cards.

I pointed out once that my mother had left us. “Do you know her address?” teacher asked. When I nodded she told me I could post it. The irony of posting a card to ‘The World’s Best Mother’ notable mainly by her absence seemed lost on Miss Marriot.

Three years ago my friend’s mother died from bowel cancer, and she said she would punch the next shop assistant who enquired whether she needed a Mother’s Day card.

Don’t get me wrong, I think Mother’s Day is a lovely tradition but many of us may not realise that Mother’s Day is an emotional time of year for those who have lost their mother; those who can’t conceive, or those who have miscarried or lost a child Perhaps Mother’s Day needs a makeover. Currently it seems to be about wish-lists, hints to spouses about booking the perfect restaurant and a barrage of adverts featuring the perfect nuclear family.

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Our children, and maybe the rest of us need to understand that Mother’s Day isn’t about spending lots of money or being pressured into meeting crazy expectations.

In the UK it originated when children, mainly daughters (often as young as ten), who had gone to work as domestic servants were given a day off to visit their mother and family.

This grew from the centuries-old tradition of people to returning to their home or ‘mother’ church once a year. The return to the ‘mother’ church became an occasion for family reunions.

As there is no tradition of gift-giving on Mother’s Day we are free to invent our own traditions and I think it’s the perfect chance to inspire kindness, compassion and giving of time rather than possessions.

I would love to see an ‘alternative’ Mother’s Day focussed on less material things. I want to talk to my children about what Motherhood means to me and what having a mother means to them.

I want all of us to think about the people around us, at school, or work, in our social circle and community who might be having a hard time in the midst of Mother’s Day celebrations?

How can we reach out and share a little kindness or hope? With a card?

A note? A phone call?

Last year my kids and I chose to sponsor a child at an orphanage in Uganda. It gives us pleasure to know that someone who has no mother of her own is receiving care and education.

This year my friend and her children made a food parcel for their local food bank and donated it in her mother’s name. Her mother volunteered at a foodbank before she became ill so this seemed a fitting way to remember her.

If you are struggling with Mother’s Day this year, please know that you are not alone. Reach out and talk to a friend; look for others with whom to share.

Be kind to yourself, and if there is no-one you feel you can share your thoughts with consider starting with you and reach out to others who might need support.

By Helen Jones

Beetroot A Brief History... Native to Southern Europe, beetroot and beet leaves have been enjoyed by Mediterranean populations for millennia. Originally, beets evolved from the wild sea beet.

The Babylonians ate the root around 4000 years ago, the Ancient Greeks only ate the leaves, preferring to save the roots for medicine and the Romans began cultivation, eating the leaves and regarding the root as an aphrodisiac.

The Food... A variety of Beta Vulgaris, like chard and spinach, beets are also a member of the poisonous Nightshade family (Solanaceae).

Sometimes called “Blood Turnips” they are commonly red but can also be golden, white or striped.

Delicious and versatile, beetroot and beet leaves can be used in appetisers, soups, main courses, salads desserts and even beverages. kidneys and gall bladder, Renews damaged cells in the immune system, Purifies and im-proves blood circulation, Fights inflammation.

Did You Know? Beetroot contains feel-good tryptophan, the same

chemical that is present in chocolate and Aphrodite, the Greek goddess accredited her powers of beauty and love to the beetroot.

For Expectant Mothers... If you’re pregnant, beets should be your new best friend. Beets contain Vitamin B folate which in turn aids in the development of the baby’s spinal column, DNA, and RNA. Vitamin B folate is extremely vital to all normal tissue growth. One cup of beets contains 136 grams of folate, and amaz-ingly only 75 calories.

A Word Of Warning: Beets contain oxalates and in excess can cause bodily fluids to crys-tallise. They can exacerbate kidney and blad¬der stones.

A History Lesson Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May.......and still smelled pretty good

by June. However, they were starting to smell, so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odour.

Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children.

Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying, Don’t throw the baby out with the Bath water..

Houses had thatched roofs, thick straw-piled high, with no wood undemeath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof.

Hence the saying. It’s raining cats and dogs.

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house.. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That’s how canopy beds came into existence.

The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had some-thing other than dirt. Hence the saying, Dirt poor. The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance way. Hence the saying a threshhold.

(Getting quite an education, aren’t you?)

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot.

They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat.

Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special.

When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off.

It was a sign of wealth that a man could, bring home the bacon. They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and chew the fat..

Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the “upper crust” .

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky. The combination would sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial.

They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.

England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone house and reuse the grave.

When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found lo have scratch marks on the inside and they realised they had been burying people alive. So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell.

Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be saved by the bell or was considered a dead ringer.

And that’s the truth...Now, whoever said history was boring!

They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day.

Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while.

Hence the rhyme, Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old.

13

Puzzle Page Quick Crossword

Crossword Clues Across 7 Put up for election (8) 8 Strong impulse, desire (4) 9 Small amount of food, a mouthful (6) 10 Snow-block house (5) 11 Diary keeper ____ Frank (4) 12 Accepted, allowed (8) 14 Possible (8) 18 Cloak (4) 20 Nibble, sample (5) 22 Small tower (6) 23 Puddling similar to semolina (4) 24 Gushing streams of water (8)

Down 1 Chrysalis (6) 2 Beatniks, bohemians (8) 3 Pungent bulb used in cooking (6) 4 Hand in your notice (6) 5 Haul, tug (4) 6 Disregard, neglect (6) 13 Happened (8) 15 Non-speaking actors in crowd scenes (6) 16 Gasp, inhale (6) 17 Whole, complete (6) 19 Lots, abundance (6) 21 Excessively studious person (4)

Wordsearch Clues Addition Algebra Area Average Base Binomial Coefficient Cube Denominator Diameter Division Factor Geometry Infinity

14

Inverse Logarithm Numerator Prime Quadratic Radius Set Sine Square Tangent Trigonometry Variable Vector

You can find the answers to the puzzles on Page 17

The Science Of Sleep March is National Bed Month.

We spend about a third of our lives in bed so if we live until 75 we’ll have been asleep for 25 years! We all know that a good night’s sleep is important but how much sleep do we really need and why do we do it?

The question of why we sleep is actually quite mysterious. In simple terms it’s a daily extended bout of rest where we lay down with our eyes closed. But there’s more to sleep than meets the eye.

During this time, our bodies replenish

energy stores and make vital repairs, while our minds organise and store the memories of from day before.

The amount of sleep we need depends on our age, sex, health and other factors, and our sleep cycles change as we grow older.

Most of us know (or think we do) that we should get ‘8 hours sleep a night’ but in fact there is no magic number for how much sleep we should get because we’re all different.

Providing you’re not regularly trying to get through your life on two or three

hours a night (unless you’re a new mother in which case you have my sympathy) it’s important not to get too hung up on the quantity of your sleep but instead focus on the quality.

When we first fall asleep we enter nonrapid eye movement sleep (NREM).

This is divided into three stages, with each becoming progressively deeper.

NREM1 and NREM2 are light phases of sleep, from which we can be easily roused. NREM3 becomes deeper, and if woken up, we can feel disorientated.

Following on from this is rapid eye movement sleep (REM), the stage at which we dream. When scientists study brainwaves during REM sleep they find that the brain behaves similar to when we’re awake, but our muscles are more-or-less inactive.

Each sleep cycle lasts around 90 minutes, and in order to feel fully rested and refreshed when we wake up, we must experience all four stages.

A full night’s sleep will include of five or six cycles, while a disturbed, restless night consists of fewer.

The perfect sleep environment Comfortable temperature (16-18C) Fresh air circulating but no draughts.

Dark - try using blackout blinds or an eye mask.

A large bed - Buy the largest you can accommodate A quality mattress - try out lots and buy the best you can afford.

Ban technology - The blue light emitted by screens is hazardous to good quality sleep.

Quiet - you can buy soft earplugs if noise is a problem though some people sleep better with white noise in the background.

Routine - A regular bedtime routine is an important cue to help us fall asleep.

Think about the bath, book, bed routine we often establish for our children. You can use essential oils, a good book and a warm milky drink.

Avoid caffeine, alcohol and screen use too close to bedtime, and never go to bed on an argument!

By Louise Addison

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All About March

March is the third month of the year in both the Julian and Gregorian calendars. It is the second month to have a length of 31 days.

In the Northern Hemisphere, the meteorological beginning of spring occurs on the first day of March The bloodstone and aquamarine are the birth-stones for March.

Zodiac signs: Pisces and Aries People born in the beginning and middle of March are Pisces. Those born from March 21 on are Aries March was called Hlyda or Lide in Old English, which is a reference to the loud winds.

Puzzle Solutions

The name March comes from the Roman god of war, Mars.

For many years. March, being the start of spring, was also the start of the New Year. Much of Europe used March as the start of the year. Britain used March 25th as the beginning of the New Year until 1752.

Easter is sometimes celebrated in March.

March is the only month with three consecutive consonants in its name in English.

MARCH is an acronym for the Medically Aware and Responsible Citizens of Hyderabad.

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St Patrick’s Day

17th March...

4. So do New Yorkers New York City’s Saint Patrick’s Day Parade is one of the world’s largest parades. Since 1762, 250,000 marchers have traipsed up Fifth Avenue on foot — the parade still doesn’t allow floats, cars, or other modem trappings.

1. We should really wear blue Saint Patrick himself would have to deal with pinching on his feast day. His colour was “Saint Patrick’s blue,” a light shade.

The colour green only became associated with the big day after it was linked to the Irish independence movement in the late 18th century.

5.Chicago feels lucky, too New York may have more manpower, but Chicago has a spectacle all on its own.

The city has been celebrating Saint Patrick by dumping green dye into the Chicago River since 1962. It takes 40 tons of dye to get the river to a suitably festive shade!

2. Saint Patrick was British Although he made his mark by introducing Christianity to Ireland in the year 432, Patrick wasn’t Irish himself.

He was born to Roman parents in Scotland or Wales in the late fourth century.

6. It used to be a dry holiday For most of the 20th century, Saint Patrick’s Day was considered a strictly religious holiday in Ireland, which meant that the nation’s pubs were closed for business on March 17. (The one exception went to beer vendors at the big national dog show, which was always held on Saint Patrick’s Day.)

3. The Irish take Saint Patrick’s day seriously As you might expect, Saint Patrick’s Day is a huge deal in his old stomping grounds.

Its a national holiday in both Ireland and Northern Ireland.

In 1970, the day was converted to a national holiday, and the stout resumed flowing.

7. It’s the thought that counts Not every city goes all-out in its celebratory efforts. From 1999 to 2007, the Irish village of Dripsey proudly touted that it hosted the Shortest Saint Patrick’s Day Parade in the World.

The route ran for 26 yards between two pubs. Today, Hot Springs, Arkansas claims the title for brevity — its brief parade runs for 98 feet.

8. There’s a reason for the shamrocks How did the shamrock become associated with Saint Patrick? According to Irish legend, the saint used the three leafed plant as a metaphor for the Holy Trinity when he was first introducing Christianity to Ireland.

9. Cold weather helped Saint Patrick’s legend In Irish lore, Saint Patrick gets

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credit for driving all the snakes out of Ireland.

Modem scientists suggest that the job might not have been too hard — according to the fossil record, Ireland has never been home to any snakes.

known as “corns”.

Through the Ice Age, Ireland was too cold to host any reptiles, and the surrounding seas have staved off serpentine invaders ever since.

11. The world runs up quite a bar tab All of the Saint Patrick’s Day revelry around the globe is great news for brewers.

Modern scholars think the “snakes” Saint Patrick drove away were likely metaphorical.

A 2012 estimate pegged the total amount spent on beer for Saint Patrick’s Day celebrations at $245 million.

And that’s before tips to pubs’ bartenders.

10. There’s no corn in that beef Comed beef and cabbage, a traditional Saint Patrick’s Day staple, doesn’t have anything to do with the grain corn. Instead, its a nod to the large grains of salt that were historically used to cure meats, which were also

12. There are no female leprechauns Don’t be fooled by any holiday decorations showing lady leprechauns.

In traditional Irish folk tales, there are no female leprechauns, only nattily attired little guys.

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Did You Know?

1. The pupils of a goat’s eyes are square 2. Van Gogh only sold one painting when he was alive.

3. A standard slinky measures 87 feet when stretched out.

4. The highest per capita Jell-O comsumption in the US is Des Moines.

5. If a rooster can’t fully extend its neck, it can’t crow.

6. There were always 56 curls in Shirley Temple’s hair.

7. The eyes of a donkey are positioned so that it can see all four feet at all times.

8.Worcestershire sauce in essentially an Anchovy Ketchup.

9. Rhode Island is the only state in which the hammer throw is a legal high school sport.

10. The average lifespan of an eyelash is five months.

11. A spider has transparent blood.

12. Every acre of American crops harvested contains 100 pounds of insects.

14. 11% of people are left handed 15. August has the highest percentage of births 16. Unless food is mixed with saliva you can’t taste it 17. The average person falls asleep in 7 minutes 18. Abear has 42 teeth 19. An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain 20. Lemons contain more sugar than strawberries 21. 8% of people have an extra rib 22. 85% of plant life is found in the ocean

Choc Facts Chocolate comes from the Aztec word ‘xocolatl’, meaning bitter water.

Originally it was consumed as a drink made from cacao beans, chillies, achiote and cornmeal. Emperor Montezuma drank 50 golden goblets every day!

Hitchcock used chocolate syrup for blood in the famous 45 second shower scene in his movie Psycho.

Over 66 percent of the world’s cacao is produced in Africa. The US consumes the most chocolate per year, but the Swiss consume the most per capita.

Columbus brought the cocoa bean to Europe, but Cortez first realised its commercial value. With the addition of cane sugar the chocolate drink became very popular, but it wasn’t until 1842 that the first chocolate bar was produced by Cadbury.

One unfortunate Bishop was poisoned by chocolate-addicted parishioners because he tried to ban its consumption during church services.

Largest and longest records go to Nestle for creating the largest cup of hot chocolate (2,400 litres) in November 2010, and to Mirco Della Vecchia for producing the longest chocolate bar measuring 15.9m a year later.

Aphrodisiacal qualities are believed by many to be contained in chocolate.

Thorntons produced the world’s biggest chocolate bar (six tonnes of it!) in October 2011 to celebrate its 100th birthday.

Energy-seeking Napoleon always carried chocolate with him to use as a pick-me-up whenever he needed a boost.

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Australian Wines

As we progress through the year Australia has several climates, because of the size of the country.

Located in the Southern Hemisphere, Australia’s seasons are the reverse of ours. The north of Australia has a tropical climate and the temperate south of the country has warm, dry summers and cool, wet winters.

A very diverse landscape is found in Australia, with beautiful beaches, very busy cities and coral reefs Yalumba, founded in 1849, is reputed to be Australia’s oldest family-owned winery, and too, has a commitment to quality.

Producing full-bodied reds, superb whites and desseil wines, that most definitely will not disappoint, from varietals such as Pinot Grigio, Sauvignon Blanc, Shiraz, Viognier and Cabernet Sauvignon, to name just some, this company has an environmental management plan, which looks ahead, ensuring a sustainable business. www.yalumba.com Several superb grape varieties are grown in the wine areas and wonderful wines can be located, from Australia, which has more than 60 wine regions.

With crisp, fresh, elegant and rich, plus sparkling and sweet wines, I found many excellent ranges, from really great wineries.

Their Art Series, Chardonnay, has been hailed as Australia’s finest example, and the Prelude Vineyards Chardonnay, is another superb production from Leeuwin Estate, which has large plantings of vines.

The cool climate, gravel soils, knowledge and expertise, all coming to fruition, in really remarkable wines Cabernet Sauvignon, Shiraz, Riesling and Sauvignon Blanc are further varietals used to produce a wonderful range of wines, from an outstanding company. www.leeuwinestate.com.au

De Bolton has something for everyone and every occasion. Superb Chardonnays, Shiraz, Merlots and Moscato, can be found, amongst their range, plus the renowned Botrytis Semillon, Noble One.

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The sites and seasons show through, in their productions of some very appealing styles of wines. www.debortoli.com.au Australian wines are widely available, with many excellent wineries exporting from Australia to the UK and worldwide I found the regional wine styles very interesting and some of the wineries’ stories, fascinating. www.wineaustralia.com

The Leeuwin Estate, situated in the Margaret River region of the South West of Western Australia, has an outstanding vineyard, producing superb quality grapes, and winery.

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There are wonderful qualities in the wines from Australia, with some of the wineries having several generations of families working in the trade, for many years.

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Grape Facts

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If you talk about grapes, most people instantly think of wine... But grapes themselves are loaded with nutrients and provide many of the same health benefits of wine - without the alcohol.

In research resveratrol demonstrated the ability to improve the dilation of blood vessels, which may allow blood to flow more easily through blood vessels.

Phytonutrients - plant chemicals that contain protective, diseasepreventing compounds -are bioactive compounds that are not designated as traditional nutrients, but have been shown to have health benefits in humans. Grapes are loaded with them, particularly in the skin.

It has also been shown to relax the walls of the blood vessels, making their diameter larger, thereby lowering blood pressure, and allowing a higher volume of blood to flow through all areas of the body, delivering increased oxygen and nutrients to the body’s cells.

Resveratrol is a polyphenol antioxidant synthesized by the grape plant for antifungal and defensive properties. Numerous research studies have demonstrated the health benefits of resveratrol. It lowers risk of cardiovascular disease by preventing lipid oxidation and it modulates levels of lipids and lipoproteins in the body.

Another study found that just 10 mg of supplementary resveratrol resulted in a dramatic reduction in heart-attack risk factors.

Resveratrol is also a potent antioxidant, which not only reduces oxidation, but also helps to strengthen other antioxidant substances in the body.

Exciting research led by MaryAnne DellaFera, PhD at the University of Georgia found that resveratrol (particularly when combined with soy isoflavones) works on the body in two ways to significantly assist with weight loss efforts: 1. it dramatically reduces cells’ ability to store fat by about 130 percent; and 2. causes fat cells to disintegrate at a rate 246 percent higher than normal.

Studies at the University of Switzerland proved resveratrol’s brain-protecting ability. They found that resveratrol mopped up brain damaging plaques and free radicals, which have been linked to Alzheimer’s disease.

So powerful is this important nutrient that it has even been referred to as “Reverse-it-all” by many health practitioners.

In numerous studies, resveratrol has3 The AD PAGE had a positive effect on cancer.

Research also shows that resveratrol protects the skin from damaging UVB rays of the sun, thereby protecting it against skin cancer.

Grapes are also an excellent source of manganese and a good source of vitamin B6, thiamin, potassium. and vitamin C.

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Groan!

Honey Dijon Chicken

My wife said she’s leaving me over my obsession with Take That. I’m so gutted. Whatever I said, whatever I did, I didn’t mean it.

This is a very simple one baking sheet dinner that’s easy to throw together on those busy weeknights.

You’ve got everything you need for a flavourful dinner — chicken, potatoes and broccoli all marinated and drizzled with a delicious honey Dijon glaze.

The in-laws bought me a pair of roller blades from Poundland for my birthday. - Cheapskates!

Check how quick it is to make this simple dish:

Burglars broke into my local corner shop last week and stole all the Red Bull.

Ingredients: 2 tablespoons olive oil, divided 3 tablespoons honey 1 tablespoon Dijon mustard 3 cloves garlic, minced 1/2 teaspoon dried oregano 1/2 teaspoon dried basil 1/2 tsp sea salt plus more to taste 1/4 tsp freshly ground black pepper, to taste 16 ounces baby red potatoes, halved 4 boneless, skinless chicken breasts, 5-6oz each, pounded to even thickness if necessary so that they cook evenly or you can use leg portions 20 ounces broccoli florets Instructions: 1. Whisk together 1 Tbsp of the olive oil with the honey, Dijon mustard, garlic,

I don’t know how they can sleep at night.

oregano, basil, salt and pepper.

2. Reserve half of the sauce for later, then marinate the chicken in the rest of the sauce for an hour 3. Preheat the oven to 400F. 4. Toss the potatoes with the second Tbsp of olive oil and a pinch of salt.

Place them on a foil-lined half sheet pan and lay the chicken breasts on top.

Add the broccoli to the pan, then drizzle the reserved sauce over top.

My mum said “You treat this place like a hotel!” She will regret that when I give her a low score on TripAdvisor for ‘rude staff.

My wife has left a note on the kitchen table saying that that she’s leaving me because of my obsession with online poker.

I think she’s bluffing, so I’m going to call her.

I was assaulted last night by some guy who hit me over the head with a power tool.

I was minding my own business when ‘Bosch’.

My son has just come home carrying a sofa and an arm chair.

He said, “Someone has just given me these.” So I’ve grounded him. I’ve warned him about accepting suites from strangers.

AD

September 2017 Issue No. 193

*If you prefer your broccoli to still have some crispness to it, don’t add the broccoli to the pan until 15 minutes into the cooking time.

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Dr Seuss Day You’re never too old, too wacky or wild, to pick up a book and read to a child…

It’s no understatement to say that he revolutionized children’s literature.

This is taken Prior to Seuss, from the US US children had Fascinating Fact website for been taught to ‘Read Across read using the One of Seuss’s most popular books, America’ Day, rather sterile Green Eggs and Ham, was written as the which takes Dick and Jane result of a bet that he could not write a place on March books. I can book using only 50 words.

2nd - the remember in anniversary the UK, aged The words are, in order of appearance: of Dr. Seuss’s five, being I am Sam; that; do not like; you green eggs and ham; them; would here or death. The taught using there; anywhere; in a house with mouse; slogan caught the English eat box fox; car they; could; may will see my eye when I equivalent, tree; let me be; train on; say the dark; was looking for Peter and Jane. rain; goat; boat; so try may; if; good; something else I remember my thank. entirely because mother rolling it was so her eyes and unmistakeably saying, ‘I’m sure Seuss-ish, and in our family Dr. Seuss we can find something more fun than is worshipped across the generations. this darling,’ before presenting me with The Cat in the Hat. I was hooked.

In spite of being born in Kent, I was brought up on the works of Dr, Seuss. Seuss published more than 40 books My mother was a trainee English during his lifetime and they’ve sold teacher who wrote her dissertation on over half a billion copies, more even him. than JK Rowling.

She adored the way he played with language. My own children could recite The Cat in the Hat word-forword before they could ever read it for themselves.

Like all the best young-children’s authors, Seuss never talked down to them. His work is playful, silly, and anarchic, something which appeals to children the world over, yet he never had any children of his own.

He was born Theodore Seuss Geisel.

He started using Seuss while at university and added the ‘Dr.’ as a joke; because his father always said he wanted him to be a professor!

We don’t celebrate Dr. Seuss in this country as they do in the US, but perhaps we should. Without him we might not have the marvellous works of Julia Donaldson, Lynley Dodd or Lauren Child. So Happy Seuss Day!

He loved to write and draw cartoons, yet his first book, And to Think That I Saw it on Mulberry Street, was rejected by 27 publishers - a lesson to aspiring authors everywhere.

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