delish magazine
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DELISHMAG.COM
*Live like you mean it.
Fresh
* No. 1
issue
Spring / Summer 2010
) Editor’s Letter
At long last, I can say the words I’ve been waiting to say… welcome to Delish Magazine.
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So what IS Delish, anyway? Maybe it’s best to start with what it’s not.
Delish is NOT about making a woman feel inadequate, like she is not enough or does not have enough. Those days are over, sister.
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Delish is hip, not hipster. Witty, not obnoxious. Interesting, not self-conscious, and practical. It won’t glorify Hollywood standards of beauty and thinness. It won’t revel in gossip. It will celebrate true efforts made by real people to live consciously, responsibly and joyously. It will offer information and stories in all areas of life: Live, Work, Look, Feel, Go, Care and Be. What you’ll be reading shortly isn’t just a representation of a new era in online publishing. It isn’t just a collection of communal wisdom, practical and whimsical inspiration, and best-of product reviews. And it isn’t just a way to espouse appreciation of and participation in a way of living that begins at home — the heart center of our lives — and extends to health, relationships, work, our larger community, and the world. It’s all that and more — but at its core, it is a labor of love and, actually, an act of sheer desperation. You see, Delish is what you get when you take three seasoned media and design professionals who are new media junkies, and ask them to find a magazine that they can really identify with, or at least one that won’t make them queasy, a few pages in. When we couldn’t find one, we decided to create one. Delish has been evolving for months and is still evolving, but it has and will always come down to traditional values in a modern mindset. We are, and we are writing for, the kind of women who want to do it all and have it all, but realize full well that we just might drop a ball here and there in that great undertaking… and we’re okay with that. We take pride in our homes and our families, in cooking, baking, sewing and knitting, making preserves and all the things our mothers and grandmothers did. Because it might not come as naturally to us as it did to the older generation, we’re probably not doing it ‘just right’ — but we’re trying, we’re loving every minute of it, and we’re not worried about the subjugation of our fair sex while we’re at it. The delicious irony: on these pages in the issues to come, we aim to espouse the home and family as the most important things in life; but the truth is, we’ve ignored our own as we tucked ourselves into dark corners and quiet offices to put this premiere issue together. Our families will be glad to have us back for a little while, and there’s three weeks of laundry piling up and waiting to be folded. So is this a case of do as we say, not as we do? Not at all. The idea here is: take your messy life, and live it. And love it. So here’s to us, thoroughly 21st Century women, equally at home in an apron as in a suit or a ballgown, at the sewing table, dinner table or boardroom table. This one’s for you. Live like you mean it,
Tamara
i Delish will initially be released as a quarterly, seasonal online magazine, with the next, fuller issue being released in Fall 2010. Be sure to keep up with us on our blog, and go to our resource list at delishmag.com to find pretty much everything we talk about here.
delish* magazine
*Live like you mean it.
Fresh
IN EVERY ISSUE
Loves 12 Delish Lovely things that make us squeal a little to Etsy 13 Heavens Haute Handmade
of Mouse 14 Word What's on our current must-click lists
15 A Little Birdy Told Us
These are a few of our favorite(d) tweets
16 I am Woman
Written by: Emma Alvarez Gibson Marianne Elliott has worked as a corporate lawyer, an advisor to the Prime Minister of New Zealand, a fairy, a storyteller, a human rights lawyer, and a human rights monitor, among others. Currently a peacekeeper, yoga teacher and writer, she chats with Delish about this thing called life.
oh Man 18 Man Written by: Emma Alvarez Gibson The no-nonsense Jim Mitchem talks advertising, baseball, smoking, drinking, and doles out sage advice (like this: don’t tell the agency owner’s best friend to “write his own fucking copy”).
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SPRING / SUMMER 2010
20 FEATURES In My Skin Written by: Tamara Komuniecki While a new celebrity sex tape seems to come out every week, regular women are making nudity sexy again.
Frank Delaney, Seanachai Written by: Emma Alvarez Gibson Acclaimed author Frank Delaney speaks with us about politics, youth, language and the art of storytelling.
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MAKE By-the-Book DIY Written by: Tamara Komuniecki Crack (a book) before crafting‌
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Hip Date Night Clutch Written by: Alexis Meschi Demystifying DIY with MadeByLex!
GROW Finding your Inner Farmer Written by: Stevie Rose You don’t need a homestead to grow your own food with these edible gardening projects that beautify and nourish.
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LIVE
I Really Dig My.. Written by: Tamara Komuniecki A round-up of tools that gardening experts think you ought to pick up before you get dirt under your fingernails this growing season.
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TASTE Riffin' in the Kitchen Written by: Shelby Chambers Inspired by the offerings of her local farmers market, Shelby Chambers improvises three healthy, delicious and inexpensive meals.
NEST Getting my Apron On Written by: Emma Alvarez Gibson Surprise! Domesticity is not the enemy.
READ Cat's Reading Corner Written by: Catherine Basso Book lovers, unite!
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SHINE Edible Beauty Written by: Gillian Young Cooking up beauty treatments with delicious ingredients.
No Time to Shower? Take a Powder.
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Written by: Gillian Young The best quick-fix solutions for greasy-haired girls on the go.
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CARE NURTURE Breastmilk on my Keyboard — The Adventures of a Lactating Journalist What They Didn’t Tell Me About Becoming A Mother
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Written by: Tamara Komuniecki NICU nurses taught me how to take care of my premature son. Taking care of myself was another story.
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What You Read May Change Your Life Written by: Sophie Fern A guide to expanding your kid’s horizons.
Found for the Family Written by: Tamara Komuniecki and Cynthia Merriman Good stuff for the biggest to the smallest (and even the furriest) in your household.
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GREEN A Designer's Clothing Written by: Dawn Mori Vancouver artist Natalie Purschwitz examines our relationship with clothing by only wearing items she creates herself for one year.
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BE BE DELISH! Delish DyVa / Ask the Instigator Written by: Dyana Valentine Professional instigator Dyana Valentine dishes out Delish advice.
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IT IS NOT ONLY FINE FEATHERS THAT MAKE FINE BIRDS.
~ AESOP, THE JAY AND THE PEACOCK FABLES
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delish* magazine
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF/CO-FOUNDER Tamara Komuniecki MANAGING EDITOR/CO-FOUNDER Emma Alvarez Gibson DESIGN DIRECTOR/CO-FOUNDER Cynthia Merriman CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Emma Alvarez Gibson Catherine Basso Shelby Chambers Sophie Fern Tamara Komuniecki Cynthia Merriman Alexis Meschi Dawn Mori Stevie Rose Dyana Valentine Gillian Young PHOTOGRAPHY Gillian Horsey ILLUSTRATION Cynthia Frenette WEB DESIGN Green Couch Designs
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ADVERTISING 778.99MEDIA ads@delishmag.com E-mail: hello@delishmag.com Web site: delishmag.com Twitter: @DelishMag
DELISH IS... Tamara
KOMUNIECKI / EDITOR-IN-CHIEF A journalist since 1994, Tamara Komuniecki has taken on every kind of story imagineable. Her experiences as a broadcast and print/web journalist include attaching herself to Siberian Huskies while on crosscountry skis, covering murders, wars, fires and floods, commandeering a jet, learning to surf, and writing about anti-cellulite running shoes. Media aside, she has also worked as a figure model, a clown at the zoo, a 911 operator, and a production assistant for U2. She considers herself a happy, if imperfect, homemaker and bakes, cooks and quilts with great passion. Her interests include design and architecture, sewing, and her family. Tamara’s personal motto is “Only boring people get bored”, and so she leads her three best guys (husband Konrad, son Finn, and pooch Duane) on all the adventures they can handle.
Emma
ALVAREZ GIBSON / MANAGING EDITOR Emma Alvarez Gibson is a writer with acute sensitivities to branding. (As the owner of Litmus Studio, a copywriting and brand consulting boutique, this combination comes in handy.) She has worked in the entertainment, publishing, automotive, spa and food service industries, and was quite arguably the world’s worst waitress. She also co-founded a theater production company, co-wrote, co-produced and performed in a two-woman stage play, and once performed a Shakira song in Spanish at a fundraiser. Her favorite words are “swoon,” “madcap” and “foxy.” She loves stories about Antarctic exploration, her trusty Canon Rebel, red lipstick, a good gin and tonic, and graph paper. She is married to the best man in the world. They live near the port of Los Angeles with their young son, whose antics take years off their lives on a daily basis.
Cynthia
MERRIMAN / DESIGN DIRECTOR If Cynthia Merriman were to have a superpower, it would be to be in more than one place at the same time (she’s already mastered multi-tasking and working with only one hand free). A graphic designer and owner of My Girl Friday Design Company, she has been designing for web and print projects for more than ten years. Cynthia often takes inspiration from the vintage and retro goodies she loves to surround herself with. A Pisces, Cynthia has done hand painted tattooing, worked in a pet store and has a few animals around the house, too: two Rhodesian Ridgebacks, a cat, three little ones and a husband. She wants to thank to her wonderful kids, for playing nicely while Momma does some work, and to her hubbie for holding the fort down when they didn’t.
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CONTRIBUTORS CATHERINE BASSO
is a married, 40something mamma of two members of the male population. One of her favorite things to do is head to a bookstore, grab a beverage, and stroll through the aisles smelling the new books. She has stacks of journals and poetry books chronicling her life… the good, the bad, and the ugly. Always trying to live out on a limb (because that’s where the fruit is), Cat is a student with a Spiritual guide, looking to get the most of this tapestry of life and all the threads that touch hers.
SOPHIE FERN
lives on the South Island of New Zealand. She has an “exploring islands” theme going on this year, with a trip to the Auckland Islands this winter and a move to Tasmania. She reads far too much and is delighted that this winter she has mastered chopping wood with an axe, to heat the house.
GILLIAN HORSEY is a stay-at-home mom of two precious baby girls. She loves venturing out for walks in the mountains, hand-in-hand with her girls, and with cameras around her neck. With a passion for photography and all things pretty, she’s a welcome addition to the Delish team.
DAWN MORI recently returned to Southern California after an extended stay in Minnesota where she discovered she loved to write and share stories of fascinating people, their work and their communities. She comes from a family of excellent cooks; however, she is not one of them.
GILLIAN YOUNG
loves nothing more than sitting at the dinner table for hours over a great meal. She is passionate about French pastries, road trips, anything made with chipotle, B.C wine, picnics, dresses and poetry. She has been called a lush more than once. Get to know her better at gillianyoung.com.
SHELBY CHAMBERS tries her best to be a true renaissance man — err, girl. An editorial associate at a social media agency by day, she dabbles in ballet, trains for triathlons, paints, and develops new recipes in her spare time. Next, she hopes to master the perfect pie crust and finish Swann’s Way, just as soon as she conquers her love of the couch and caffeine. Shelby enjoys writing about music, food, and art, as well as children’s stories. Visit her at shelbychambers.com.
CYNTHIA FRENNETTE Designer, Illustrator & DIY Maven, Cynthia Frenette's career began 19 years ago, learning in the "pre-computer" days of design. Over the years, she's been honing her craft and developing her own unique style. She now works with clients and other designers world-wide — providing them with cool and funky design solutions for print and web-based projects. Cynthia loves a good cosmo, has a crazy love for shoes and fashion, and loves to go for walks with her hubby Norm and her pup Starr.
ALEXIS MESCHI
is a self-taught clothing designer and seamstress. In creating her original pieces, she reuses many of the materials from great thrift shop bargains, as well as those already in her home. A stay-at-home mom to three girls, Alexis believes that you don’t need money, status or influence to create something of beauty or substance. You need heart. Visit her at madebylex.com.
STEVIE ROSE lives in Vancouver, BC, Canada, where she grows over 100 edibles, 400 perennials, and countless other plants in her small urban yard and community garden plot; a hobby that continues to grow with each season. She believes that a trowel is as good as a paintbrush for creating art, that earthworms are gifts from the gods, and that everything tastes better when you grow it yourself. Check her out at GardenTherapy.ca.
DYANA VALENTINE
is the Delish DyVa and a professional instigator. You are most likely to find her on a stage, rocking a workshop or working with her chosen few individual clients. She asks (and answers) the tough questions that help you move through your personal and professional life with aplomb. Check her out at dyanavalentine.com. Follow her on Twitter @DyanaValentine.
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DELISH LOVES
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Lovely things that make us squeal a little
EMMA'S PICKS assssd
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2 1. In my dream home, I have kitchen and bath tiles made by Heath Ceramics (oh, and I go to San Francisco to hand-pick them, too…). What? A girl can dream, can’t she? While I wait for construction to get started (it’s in the “one day” category), I’d love to console myself with a little bit of Heath in my home, with their seasonal Bud Vase Set. $100 for three vases – blue, white and yellow – and a tray. $100 from Velocity Art And Design w via Amazon.com
2. Tea, Earl Grey, Hot. I recently met two girlfriends for brunch. After I ordered a latte, my friend Abby ordered a London Fog. When the waiter left, I asked her what that was and her description had me running through the restaurant to chase him down and change my order! A London Fog is an Earl Grey tea latte with vanilla syrup. Prepared properly, the steamed milk is velvety-smooth and the vanilla complements rather than overpowers the bergamot essence of the tea. Suggestion: try it with a half-shot of vanilla first as a full shot can be a bit sweet.
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3. Crate and Barrel’s adorable Stockholm ramekins ($1.95!) Ramekins are near the top of my list of Things That Announce to the World That One is a Cook. (Oops, am I the only dork with a list like that?) These are so very cute/basic, and so very affordable. (Note: it was very hard not to work in something about Stockholm Syndrome here, but I think I managed.)
w crateandbarrel.com
4. John Fluevog’s Ashbury in black ($279). Please note: I have never spent this much on shoes. Ever. Never. Frankly, I’m always just a tad more concerned about the mortgage. But man, these are fantastic. So hot. Ugly-hot, in the manner of Daniel Craig. So very hot.
w fluevog.com
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5. Once upon a time, I had more than five minutes in the morning to put my face on. Now, I slap on what I can to get out the door and to try to look presentable. BeneFit Cosmetics Boi-ing industrial strength concealer is an absolute must for my mini morning make-up routine to cover blemishes & bags! Use it with the get even pressed powder to get rid of shine & make it look like you got an uninterrupted night of sleep!
w $18 from Sephora via Amazon.com
6. She’s big, she’s green, and she’s my new best friend named Betsy. For years I have wanted a Kitchen Aid Stand Mixer, but never took the plunge. When my other mixer bit the big one, it was my time to own one! That, and my hubbie was tired of me talking about wanting one and said "Whatever, just get one already." (I do love him so!) It’s the best appliance I have EVER purchased. Powerful, super easy to operate and gorgeous to boot. Who could ask for anything more?
w $249.99 from Target via Amazon.com
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HEAVENS TO ETSY Haute Handmade
TORTILLAGIRL CLOTHING & ACCESSORIES Forget Dior, Givenchy and Chanel — this is French haute couture that you can afford! Items are original design, draped, sculpted and pinned on a dress form and fitted on a model, so the pieces actually fit and flatter. C'est exquisite.
w etsy.com/shop/TortillaGirl HEART OF LIGHT
A colourful accessory can make a so-so outfit into a superstylish one, and there's something uber-feminine about pinning a flower on your cardi, or in your hair. This shop out of Los Angeles offers the most lovely handmade flowers that I placed another order for blue mini rosebud hairpins after I was delighted to receive my yellow rosebud pin corsage. What's next for me? Maybe red roses...
w etsy.com/shop/HeartofLight
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BAYOU SALVAGE Gorgeous, timeworn and dramatic, the clothing and accessories from Bayou Salvage look like each piece contains an entire novel. From the site: Old leather. Family secrets. Muddy back roads. Dusty linen.Tent revivals. In the deep south,atmosphere is destiny. Sold.
w etsy.com/shop/BayouSalvage KATINKA PINKA
Described as “curiousities and frippery,” Katinka Pinka’s wares are the sort of jewelry and clothing that will appeal to fans of a past that never existed. Dreamy, romantic and tough all at once, it’s the stuff a certain type of girl’s dreams are made of.
w etsy.com/shop/KatinkaPinka
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ROSY REVOLVER A little rustic, a little chic and a whole lot of cool... Rosy offers a completely unique brand of jewelry worth checking out. This girl’s design ideas are super creative, and she’s a total trail blazer with a style that’s all her own. She’s also got a spectacular and follow-worthy blog.
w etsy.com/shop/RosyRevolver RAEGUN
Lovely handmade baby and toddler clothing and accessories. Adorable diaper covers, retro rufflers, dashing jumpers... Need I say more?
w etsy.com/shop/RaeGun
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WORD OF MOUSE
TAMARA'S PICKS sssssd
Tongue in Cheek Tales of a US expatriate who married a wonderfully romantic Frenchman, living and loving in the South of France. Heavy on family, the fine things in life, and the art of the brocante. Recently opened up an e-shop selling her incredible finds from flea markets and antique shows (i.e. brocantes).
w willows95988.typepad.com
EMMA'S EMMA'S PICKS PICKS sssssd
Let’s Go Ride a Bike Two women, two cities, tons of information and many, many great photos, all in a fun, chatty, friendly tone. I love Let’s Go Ride a Bike [even without the facts of this full disclosure: they featured me and my own bicycle last year]. Whether you’re just thinking about getting back on a bicycle or have been going it hardcore for years, Let’s Go Ride a Bike is the place to be. (You know. Virtually.)
w letsgorideabike.com
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Our Perspective / Cat’s Blog Following the lovely Catherine — friend, mother, spiritual feminist & hair stylist — she walks you through the good times and the bad, taking on the rough roads with the smooth sailing, learning and growing... and she brings her family along for the ride (the Horticulturalist, the Rock Star, and the Scientist). Come on in… the water’s fine.
w ourperspective.net
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What’s on our current must-click lists
NieNie Dialogues I became captivated with and motivated by Stephanie Nielson’s love of life and family, shared in heartfelt posts and with photography of her and her beautiful family. Then she was involved in a plane crash that nearly killed her and her husband, and her blog has since marked the harrowing journey back to family life as she once knew it. She lays it bare for all to see, burn scars and all, and though I do not know her, I am more proud of her than ever.
w nieniedialogues.blogspot.com The Ruins of the Moment Pete McGregor takes stunning photos, writes eloquent, thoughtprovoking prose, and — there’s no other way to say this — is kind of a badass. The Ruins of the Moment is his photo blog, and features a new high-res image daily. Whether it’s gorgeous vistas, quotidian events or real life on the streets of India, Pete’s curiosity and love for life are tangible in every shot.
w worldsenz.blogspot.com Laura’s Mommy Journal Rants and raves about motherhood with 4 year old (adorable!) fraternal twin boys, Nate and Alex. Runner, reader, software professional, wife, Laura writes the way any parent (especially with boys!) can relate to, with an impressive resume to boot. She even manages to post everyday. Amazing!
w jonandlaura.blogspot.com
A LITTLE BIRDY TOLD US TAMARA'S PICKS sssssd These are a few of our favorite(d) Tweets
@OverlandParker: I’m thirty minutes into “The Hurt Locker” and I’m beginning to think this isn’t a documentary about the Octomom. @juliecole: Kids at public swim. That’s gonna qualify as ‘bath night’
@rgoodchild: hmmm seems my “I’m going to get up and face the day” window of desire has passed. that’s awkward.
@realerin: Nyquil is making these snowboard dudes look like rad hillbillies.
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@sesamestreet: Cookie Monster: Me don’t know why me monster eyes move like dey do. But me will look it up online – do a Googly search.
@TheNextMartha: @teammandy That’s how I know you have a girl. You do not give boys weapons like squeaky shoes. @ErikCornella: Life is not meant to be easy, my child; but take courage — it can be delightful. George Bernard Shaw
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@badbanana: If “The Princess and the Frog” sparked an interest in voodoo with your children, may I suggest renting “Angel Heart.” @Maggie: Bryan wants to talk about our map of the continental US. Usually I deflect this kind of thing with sex, but tonight I don’t have the energy.
@amalah: I’ve been blogging for six years and am still getting scolded for using the f-word. I am old and set in my ways, people. Fuck shit tampon. @thepioneerwoman: I wrote a poem once. It contained the line “My children withered in my noxious shade… because I won’t let them use glitter.” Deep, no?
Hey there! F ind us on Twitt er...
DelishMa g
@mattlogelin: at a hardware store, asked an employee, “where’s your caulk?” he paused, gave me a pretty strange look then said, “caulking? aisle two.”
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I AM WOMAN
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UNDER
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WRITTEN BY EMMA ALVAREZ GIBSON
MARIANNE ELLIOTT carries herself with an elegant dignity. Her strength is nearly tangible, underpinned by a deep tenderness. So it’s not surprising to learn she spent years in the Middle East working towards conflict resolution—and that she now teaches yoga in a small town in New Zealand. Marianne is one of those people that makes you want to do more, be more—but also inspires you to acknowledge that you’re deeply worthwhile just as you are. NAME? Marianne Elliott OCCUPATION/VOCATION/DESIGNATION?Human rights lawyer; strategic consultant and coach for not-for-profits; writer; Zen Peacekeeper; yoga teacher; friend. HOW DID YOU GET YOUR START? My first human rights case was when one of the teachers at my school made a boy from the junior class stand on top of his desk at the front of our (senior) class. The teacher invited all the students to tease him. I was enraged at the injustice and told the teacher so. Thus began a campaign that made me unpopular with the teacher, but very popular with all the kids he had been bullying. More recently, I got my start in the human rights field by taking an internship with a Palestinian human rights lawyer in the Gaza Strip. I worked for him for two years
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and he taught me much of what I know now, including the fact that every small act of kindness and compassion is shifting the balance of the world in that direction. WHAT WOULD YOU DO DIFFERENTLY, KNOWING WHAT YOU KNOW NOW? Nothing at all. I love the whole story of my life, including the rambling path I took to get my dream jobs as a Human Rights Officer with the United Nations and as a writer. WHAT IS THE MOST SURPRISING THING ABOUT BEING AN ADULT? That I still feel like the new kid in school whenever I arrive at a new workplace or party. This is despite, or perhaps because of, the fact that I grew up in a small town where I knew everyone and never was the new kid at school. WHAT IS THE MOST FUN YOU’VE EVER HAD? Dancing. Most recently it was dancing to “Footloose” with my friend at her wedding reception. We kicked off our Sunday shoes. WHO OR WHAT HAS SHAPED YOUR CURRENT DECADE? Afghanistan. The country, its people, its stories, its pain. I lived and worked in Afghanistan for two years as a human rights advocate. It changed me. After Afghanistan I move and speak more slowly. I know my own strength. I know my own shadow. I am sadder. I am more joyful. I am grateful every day for the peace and security we enjoy in New Zealand.
WHAT DOES SAFETY MEAN TO YOU? Knowing that I am my own solid ground. HOW DO YOU WANT TO BE REMEMBERED? As a loyal friend, a kind stranger and a brave woman. WHAT’S THE BEST ADVICE YOU EVER GOT? Breathe. WHAT’S THE WORST MISTAKE YOU EVER MADE? I can’t think of any. Is that terrible? I know I’ve made plenty of mistakes but I must do a job of forgetting them once I’ve learned what I need to learn from them. WHAT DID YOU LEARN FROM THAT MISTAKE? I guess I learned that once you’ve learned what you need to from a mistake you can let it go! BIGGEST (NON-ROMANTIC) HEARTBREAK? Interviewing the mothers of children killed in tribal fighting — fighting that I had failed, in my role as a UN peacekeeper, to prevent. BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE (LEAVING ASIDE WEDDINGS, BIRTHS, ETC.)? I’ve never been any good at picking favourites. I love it all. Even the crappy bits. Having said that, whenever I go on a really great hike in a spectacular setting or a fantastic dive in tropical waters I declare it to have been the best day of my life. Ain’t nature grand! HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE YOU MET IN REAL LIFE AFTER GETTING TO KNOW THEM VIA SOCIAL MEDIA? At least thirty. When I lived in Afghanistan I would go on holiday in Europe or the United States and travel around meeting the people who I had met through my blog. They were the people who had kept me company through my loneliest, darkest days and I wanted to thank them in person. In my experience the relationships that work online work just as well off-line. WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER THE MOST PRESSING ISSUE IN TODAY’S WORLD? Communication. I used to say poverty –- and I still think that poverty is a huge challenge. But given that there is more than enough (of everything that matters) to go around, what is the real problem? I am beginning to think it is communication. We just don’t see and understand each other, and as long as we don’t see and understand each other we are going to allow the profound injustice that is the current global financial and political system to continue. That’s why I’m now pouring so much energy into writing. My impending memoir, Zen Under Fire, is not only a very personal story of my own loss and then rediscovery of hope and inner peace in the midst of the war in Afghanistan; it is also my way of sharing some of the untold stories of that amazing country. I hope Zen Under Fire will help some readers see something of themselves in the people of Afghanistan and feel more of our interconnectedness.
HOW MANY CAREERS HAVE YOU HAD? I’ve had a lot of different jobs but never a career. My jobs take the form that my life takes; a lovely series of often unexpected and apparently unrelated experiences that somehow come together to form a beautiful, if sometimes raggedy, whole. So far I’ve been a fairy, a story-teller, a corporate lawyer, a student, a shopkeeper, a human rights lawyer, a communications manager, a project manager, a policy analyst, an advisor to the Prime Minister, a technical advisor on human rights, a management consultant, a social researcher, a human rights monitor, a humanitarian coordinator, a peacekeeper, a yoga teacher and a writer. WHAT OTHER CAREERS ARE WAITING FOR YOU? Setting aside the fact that I don’t have a career, I can see lots of roles still waiting for me. I’m hoping to have my first book, a memoir about my life and work in Afghanistan, published soon. So I may be about to add ‘author’ to my bio. I’ve only this past year become a yoga teacher and there is a lot more to explore in that area. I’m more and more drawn to storytelling so I’ll be looking for more ways to explore that role. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CONCERT? My first concert was Silverwind, an American Christian pop group who toured New Zealand in 1985. Our entire church youth group drove up to Auckland to go to the concert. Imagine how ABBA would look and sound if they were born-again Christians from Texas in 1985. That was Silverwind. I loved every minute of it. To this day, when I least expect it, one of their songs will pop into my head and I will discover that I still remember all the words. There is a song about the crucifixion in particular that gets stuck on auto-repeat whenever I try to enjoy a quiet walk along the beach. Thanks, Silverwind. WHAT DO YOU DO TODAY THAT YOU SWORE AS A KID YOU’D NEVER DO? Housework. I always swore I’d pay a cleaner. Sadly, my current income as a yoga teacher and writer doesn’t quite stretch that far. I actually really enjoy doing laundry and washing the dishes, but I could happily do without the rest.
MORE of MARIANNE web: marianne-elliott.com twitter: @zenpeacekeeper
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MAN OH MAN
A HORSE NO
ONE COULD RIDE
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WRITTEN BY EMMA ALVAREZ GIBSON
JIM
MITCHEM started his virtual ad agency -“smash communications” (smashcommunications.com) – in 2001, when that sort of thing was new. In the nine years since its inception, smash has done strong work, sold substantial product, and is now shifting its focus to brand consultancy. Based in North Carolina, its founder and owner is, in some ways, very much a man’s man, or an adman’s adman, which is part of his appeal. He’s unabashedly blunt, refreshingly bullshit-free. But look a bit beneath the surface and you’ll see that what drives him, what matters most of all, is his family. Man’s got soul, and lots of it… which comes through in everything he does. NAME? Jim Mitchem OCCUPATION/VOCATION/DESIGNATION? Writer. Copywriter. Creative Director. HOW DID YOU GET YOUR START? I was flitting about in North Florida after graduating college. I had nothing but a speculative book and a world of confidence. Only, North Florida is not the best place for creative advertising writers to get a foothold. I secured a few freelance gigs, but it was mostly for
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bland, non-concept work. Someone gave me the name of someone at Citibank (who had an in-house agency in Jacksonville, aptly called N-House) and the copywriter/ art director team there gave me a shot. I came on as something like full-time freelance for several months and learned as much as I could. Most of my work was mailed to Citibank and AT&T Universal Card customers as collateral pieces. It was a good gig. The writer/AD team was brought down to Florida from Saatchi in NYC and they took me under their wing. WHAT WOULD YOU DO DIFFERENTLY, KNOWING WHAT YOU KNOW NOW? Tough question. Hard to say. Probably not tell an agency owner’s best friend to write his own fucking copy when he stormed into
my office after his 2-martini lunch. I’d done some really strong work for the agency, resulting in numerous awards (and happy clients)—but none of that matters when a junior copywriter goes off on the boss’s best friend. WHAT IS THE MOST SURPRISING THING ABOUT BEING AN ADULT? How amazing children are. When you’re a kid, you don’t realize it. Well, you do, but adults tell you that you’re too young to know anything. WHAT IS THE MOST FUN YOU’VE EVER HAD? Ever? Another tough question. I’ll say our family beach trip last summer. Nothing in particular – just the way we soften up together and just are. WHO OR WHAT HAS SHAPED YOUR CURRENT DECADE? That’s easy. My wife Tina has shaped me more than any person I’ve ever known in this or any decade. She’s strong and kind. She’s mature and childlike. She carelessly cuts me and laughs while I’m bleeding. [Ed. note: How can you not love a man who quotes Billy Joel’s “She’s Always A Woman”?] WHAT DOES SAFETY MEAN TO YOU? Wearing seatbelts and having dogs in the house. Nothing else. HOW DO YOU WANT TO BE REMEMBERED? By my children, as a funny but cool dad. By my colleagues, as a horse that no one could ride. WHAT’S THE BEST ADVICE YOU EVER GOT? Always tell the truth, there’s less to remember. Ironically, this advice was given to me by someone who ended up going to prison for fraud. WHAT’S THE WORST MISTAKE YOU EVER MADE? Drinking and driving. WHAT DID YOU LEARN FROM THAT MISTAKE? I needed AA. Many years later, of course. BIGGEST (NON-ROMANTIC) HEARTBREAK? Game 6 of the 1986 NLCS, Houston Astrodome. I’m a huge baseball fan, and loved the Astros. My stepfather called me out of the blue that day to ask if I’d like to attend game 6 that afternoon at the dome. Someone had stopped by his office and given him two tickets. When we arrived, the ushers kept telling us to walk down. Down. Down. We ended up on the front row right next to the Astros’ bullpen. I mean, I was literally talking to the Astros pitchers while they were warming up. It was a great game. I even got on national TV when a screaming foul ball came down the line and I leaned over the rail to grab it. Of course it wouldn’t come near me, right? Wrong. It hit my hand and I squeezed. But my momentum carried me onto the field. I stood there for a few seconds looking at Darryl Strawberry (the Mets’ right fielder). The fans exploded. It really was a fantastic grab. A few minutes later, the cops came and took me up to the breezeway — threatened to throw me in jail, then took my ball and put in in their pocket.
I walked back down to my seat, and everyone started clapping. A few people asked what happened and I told them that the cops took my ball. A few minutes after that, one of the players wives went down to the dugout and said something to someone. Between innings, Phil Garner (the Astros’ 3B) walked over and gave me a ball from the dugout. Everyone clapped again. Told you they were good seats. Anyway, the game went 16 innings. Every pitch mattered. If the Astros lost, the season was over. From the 11th through the 16th inning, the Mets and Astros exchanged runs – meaning the Astros had to score to keep the game going. And every time, they had the winning run in scoring position. In the 16th inning, the Mets were ahead by a couple runs again, and the Astros battled back — only to leave the tying run on 3rd base as the game came to an end. I cried, along with tens of thousands of others, as we watched the Mets celebrate going to the World Series against the Red Sox (yes, the Bill Buckner gaffe World Series). BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE (LEAVING ASIDE WEDDINGS, BIRTHS, ETC.)? The day I quit drinking in 1991. Of course, at the time, it wasn’t the best day. In fact, I slept through most of it, hungover. HOW MANY PEOPLE HAVE YOU MET IN REAL LIFE AFTER GETTING TO KNOW THEM VIA SOCIAL MEDIA? Probably about 200. WHAT DO YOU CONSIDER THE MOST PRESSING ISSUE IN TODAY’S WORLD? Taking all the violent people in the world and putting them on ships in the middle of the Pacific Ocean to do whatever they want to each other. HOW MANY CAREERS HAVE YOU HAD? I’ve had just one career, but literally hundreds of jobs. Everything from migrant farmer to headhunter. WHAT OTHER CAREERS ARE WAITING FOR YOU? Probably nothing. But if I could wish for something, I think I’d like to be a Major League Baseball scout based in Florida. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CONCERT? Nazareth, Houston Coliseum, 1980. As a 16-year-old punk. WHAT DO YOU DO TODAY THAT YOU SWORE AS A KID YOU’D NEVER DO? Smoke cigarettes. Those little fuckers won’t let go.
MORE of JIM web: obsessedwithconformity.com twitter: @smashadv
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Skin
IN MY
WRITTEN BY TAMARA KOMUNIECKI
w PHOTOS BY CATHY EMPEY
FEATURE
B
ou•doir [boo-dwahr, -dwawr] n. A woman’s private sitting room, dressing room, or bedroom. Not many modern women have a boudoir, much less use the antiquated term, but the word is getting considerable airplay these days, as women of all walks of life vamp it up in front of the camera for a good time. Boudoir photography is trending in a big way, attracting a varied clientele that includes soccer moms, secretaries and stock brokers. To understand it you have to get your mind out of the gutter — think less along the lines of soft porn and sexting, and more about empowerment and body acceptance. A woman who poses in a boudoir photo session looks insecurity straight in the eye, tosses her hair and drops her robe, wearing something skimpy along with a slightly nervous smile. She also walks away from the experience with stunning images and a psyche that is usually changed for the better. Langley, B.C.-based boudoir photographer Cathy Empey says a session is usually a powerful turning point in a woman’s life — an experience that can be fun or empowering, and is often both of those and more. Barring the locker room, by the time most women hit their thirties, they aren’t seen naked or nearly so by anyone besides their chosen partners. Add in the biological facts of a changing body — a little extra padding here, a bit of sagging there, and there are bound to be some body hang-ups making their way into the room and in front of the camera. Enter the sensitive photographer, who has been there and done that. (Empey hits the big four-oh in a few years and has six kids. So “empathetic” is only the first, but maybe the best, word used to describe her.) “I’ve learned that no matter what size you are — whether you’re thin as a rail or curvy, curvy, curvy — everyone has their issues,” she says. “Everyone has a part that they don’t like, or parts that they don’t like. I like just actually talking to the women beforehand and saying, ‘Hey, it’s okay to have parts that you don’t like’.” Women of all shapes and sizes have come into Cathy’s studio, and they all go through nearly the same transformation. “I think this whole process of really just stripping yourself down in front of somebody you don’t know — to be able to do that is a freeing experience,” says Cathy. “And definitely when they see the finished product, they’re always like ‘Wow! I can’t believe that’s me, I didn’t know I looked that good!’” spring/summer 2010
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“It is
amazing
for your self-esteem.”
43-year-old Veronica B. recently had a session with Cathy, booking it, she says, as a special gift to no one but herself. “I have thought about doing this for a long time. One of those ‘I would love to do that one day’ things. I’m a mother of three kids and have been divorced for four years and thought that I had put it off long enough.” Veronica admits the first few moments were a bit uncomfortable. “I think I was a little awkward for the first few poses because this is not something you naturally do in everyday life! It felt strange, and a little intimidating, posing in lingerie, but as the session went on we began to have fun with it.” After all was said and done, Veronica loved her images and would do it again in a heartbeat — but most importantly, she came away with an enhanced sense of self-confidence. “The session made me feel beautiful and sexy even though I don’t have a 20-year-old body anymore,” she says.
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brave
“I wasn't
to do it enough in my twenties.”
Jen D. knew she wanted to do this, but there was one crucial step to take before she booked a session date. “Part of my preparation was to convince my best girl friend to come along with me,” she laughs. After that, I did arrange to have my hair and make-up done, which I would totally recommend. I felt super glamorous. I brought a selection of lingerie, mostly new things that I had picked up with the photo shoot in mind. Cathy also suggested I bring some jewelry and a nice pair of high heels." Wardrobe is a large part of creating the right mood, says Cathy, and shares the following advice on her web site for clients who are preparing for their special shoot: “Come to your session prepared with as many outfits as you like. The more the better! Bring your favourite lingerie, wee nighties, sexy tops, bras, underwear and accessories – anything that makes you feel amazing.” The time investment put into preparation, to say nothing of a few new sexy little numbers, pays off with huge dividends. Women who pose for these photos often end up surprising themselves. “The photos turned out so much more beautiful than I had expected, so it was a huge ego boost,” says Jen.“It isn’t normal for me to have my picture taken in my lingerie, but there are also parts of my body that I don’t want highlighted on film. But Cathy does a great job of understanding that you are proud of some body parts and not so proud of other parts — it’s normal, after all — and so she promised to avoid the parts that I didn’t want to see in the photos.” That savvy strategy — focus on the strengths, downplay perceived weaknesses — serves Cathy well, as her business continues to grow via word of mouth, from happy clients like Jen, who has have told everyone she knows they should go. “It is one of the best things I have ever done. Everybody should have gorgeous photos of themselves.” spring/summer 2010
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“I was a mixture of nervous and
excited."
Some bolder session models go fully nude — a total personal comfort zone thing, Cathy says, and not necessary for great shots — that magic can happen on film no matter what a woman is wearing (but a little peeka-boo doesn’t hurt, either). “I remember I had bought a really cute a pair of black polka-dot underwear that were totally see-through, front and back, I felt a bit awkward coming out of the change room with them on, since I was practically naked in them,” recalls Cathy’s 31-year-old boudoir session client Kristi C. “But once I got in position for the pictures, I was glad I had worn them, as some of my best pictures were taken in those underwear.” Kristi explains that she went into the session with no particular issues about her body, but maybe not the clearest idea of her strengths, either. “I think it has helped me to feel more confident in myself and to really be able to see my strong features. I don’t think I really saw and accepted my strong points that much… and this definitely helped.” She has put together a photo album as a wedding gift to her appreciative husband, and echoes the sentiments of Jen and Veronica, that this is an experience any woman would gain from. “I would definitely do it again,” she says, “and I would recommend it to anyone. Especially those women who do have body issues or lower confidence.”
Boudoir photography sessions aren’t cheap (Cathy’s fees start at $450 for a one-hour session) but they’re not particularly expensive either, considering what you get out of the deal — up to one hour of photography in a few outfits, 15-20 high resolution digital images, and editing and retouching of best shots. This is something you don’t want to skimp on, and after all, it’s not like you can prance around in your skivvies at the Sears portrait studio, anyway. It’s a downright deal if you think of part of the fee being dedicated towards the cathartic results. In that way, this is almost a photo therapy session with a wise and aware teacher, or maybe a fun afternoon with a girlfriend whose fresh perspective helps you see yourself with new eyes.
Just don’t make the mistake of thinking that Cathy doesn’t understand. Even as she gently guides other women over their body acceptance hurdles, she still hits some bumps in the road, herself. “I still struggle,” she says. “I do have my moments. I look through magazines and I go oh man, I’ll never be like that. I’ve learned to say, okay, I look good for who I am. I’ve had six kids, and this is me. This is me, lumps and bumps and rolls and veins, this is part of who I am, and I wouldn’t have become this person without them. I have five daughters. I want my girls to grow up with self esteem and self worth and feeling good about who they are, so that’s really important to me. I don’t want my girls growing up hating their bodies.”
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Anything
For a Story
I’ve done a lot of adventurous things in the name of journalism, but dropping my drawers in front of a camera is not one of them. Ever the intrepid reporter, I decided it was time to be a part of the story rather than just report on it, and shyly put all of my wobbly bits on display.
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There was a time when I was considerably less shy — in large part because I was considerably less wobbly. I used to be proud (or at least fearless, or maybe I was just young and dumb), and was a nude model for sketch and sculpture artists. At that time I thought I’d never be the type to be wracked by insecurities about my body…and then I hit my thirties. Years, joys and sorrows, gravity, wear and tear, and just… life… happened. I was flabbergasted to learn that I am no stranger to cellulite, and the last thing you would have caught me doing even on a good day is getting nude in front of a stranger, much less one with a camera.
Preparing
FOR YOUR SESSION
• Check out other photos • Peruse boudoir photographer’s web sites, look at magazines, get inspired. What I experienced in this particular brand of nude gonzo journalism (because yes, I did take it all off) is that it’s very powerful to face your fear of being nude in front of a stranger. It seems to me, that fear stems from the fact that we think we might be judged, but in such a warm and inviting environment where a woman is allowed and encouraged to let her inner vamp out, acceptance is the order of the day. There’s something very powerful about seeing an image of yourself with a fleeting expression that a photographer has managed to capture — coy, flirtatious, sensuous. If you’ve never thought of yourself that way, or never imagined you were capable of looking that way, believe me when I say that there’s something amazing in seeing an image that has captured that side of you. Seeing yourself in that new, beautiful light completely outweighs any body image-related trepidation you might feel for those first few moments.
• Bring some of your favorites to your session to show the photographer what look you are attracted to. • Buy a new outfit, or a few — bring a change of clothing. • Bring props — feather boa, sheer robe, string of pearls, dangly earrings, sky-high stilettos. • Splurge on hair and makeup if you aren’t the most talented in that department — this is the time to glam it up, how often will you have this opportunity? • Bring a CD with your favorite mood-setting music. • Leave your body concerns and fears at the door — this is a non-judgmental environment! web: cathyempey.com twitter: @cathyempey
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FEATURE
Frank Delaney, Seanachai w WRITTEN BY EMMA ALVAREZ GIBSON w PHOTO BY JERRY BAUER
I took Ireland home with me.
Right across the top, in caps, the big book announced its name. IRELAND, it said, and underneath that, in more demure letters: A Novel. Impressed by the obvious confidence of an author who would lend his book the name of an entire nation, I was moved to read the blurb on the dust jacket. Drawn in by its mention of the seanachai, traditional Irish storytellers (pronounced “SHAN-ah-kee”), and hints of a tapestry woven from history, folklore and fiction, I was very quickly sold. Two pages in, I knew I would have to read everything Frank Delaney had ever written. And so, as quickly as possible, I picked up Shannon, then Tipperary, and then Venetia Kelly’s Traveling Show. And swooned. And laughed. And wept. Delaney’s tremendous insight into all aspects of Irish history — politics, social issues, interpersonal relationships, and the land; always, the land — is mighty. Yet it pales in comparison to his storytelling skills. Rich, deft, and as far removed from glib as physically possible, his writing evokes all of the magic in the best of children’s
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literature, with adult sensibilities and themes. Brimming with love and respect: for language, for history, for culture, for people, the writing grips you, pulls you in, makes you understand and care very deeply about its subjects. And though he now resides in the US, Delaney makes Ireland come alive for the reader. Broadcaster, journalist, playwright, stage actor and New York Times bestselling novelist (and banker, but that was a long time ago), the intensely eloquent Delaney adores a good story — the through line, he says, of his career. “No matter how you boil it down, it’s all storytelling,” he says. “In journalism we call an article in a newspaper a story. Broadcasting is telling the story as it happened, giving it an interest to people. I was always interested in radio, once I heard it as a little boy. I loved the way radio was telling me these stories. But here’s the truth of it: for as long as I can remember, I wanted to write fiction and drama. And I knew because of the way I was brought up in Ireland and because of family
limitations and so on and so forth, I was never going to get exactly the shape of education I wanted to teach me these things. So, I figured if I went into broadcasting I was going to be dealing with trained communicators. And that is exactly what happened. At the BBC I was working with some of the most intelligent, educated and professional men in the world. And they taught me how to communicate.”
"When I die, one of my few regrets will be that I will no longer be able to use the English language." Frank Delaney
Ah, yes: the girl. No slouch in the female character department, Delaney quite obviously loves women, a fact to which he immediately owns up. “That’s well-observed. I grew up in a house where there was a very, very strong female presence… one couldn’t but grow up observing these women, these amazing women, my sisters and my aunts — I had an absolute bevy of aunts who were very strong women — and my mother. That is bound to creep in and influence what I’m doing hugely. I love the challenge, from a man’s point of view, of creating female characters, because it’s very difficult. And a lot of writers, I think, a lot of male writers, are somewhat afraid of it. There’s a very famous quote from James Joyce’s wife, Nora. She says, ‘He doesn’t know the first thing about women.’ What she meant was that Joyce wrote about women as men imagine them to be, but not as women actually are. And I think the challenge for a writer like me, in this
His latest novel, Venetia Kelly’s Traveling Show (published in February), tells the story of a pivotal time, both in Ireland’s political history and in the life of his protagonist, eighteen-year-old Ben McCarthy. Ben’s world is turned upside down when his father abandons the family farm for the company of a young actress, and his mother sends him out to get his father back. So begins an epic odyssey that is deeply personal, while underscoring the broader landscape. An only child, Ben has a well-developed understanding of the human condition and is wise beyond his years — one of several recurring themes in Delaney’s work. “The cult of youth when I was growing up in Ireland really bothered me,” he says. “The cult of youth which said, ‘You will be children for a long, long time.’ We were never given room to grow. I jettisoned very early the idea that just because you’re young, you can’t do stuff. And just because you’re young, you don’t know stuff. We did stuff. We knew stuff.” “I grew up at the end of a long family, almost as an only child, because all the associations and societies among my siblings had been formed by the time I came along. So I grew up watching everybody. Some of that has transferred onto Ben. He’s watchful, he’s a watchful boy. And of course, being watchful enables him to achieve things. He’s able to get things done…and in actual fact, he’s able to get the girl, which is really what he’s supposed to be doing.” spring/summer 2010
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century, is to write about women as they really are. And it’s some challenge, I can tell you!” Another theme central to Delaney’s work is that of the mythical hero. Each of the protagonists in his most recent novels must pass a series of challenges in order to move on to the next phase for which they’re so yearning. In Ireland, Ronan O’Mara sets out on foot to find the itinerant Storyteller who visited his childhood home; Shannon’s Robert Shannon is an American searching for his Irish roots and for an end to the shellshock brought on by World War II; Tipperary’s Charles O’Brien must wait for years and endure an incredible amount of pain before he can be with the woman he loves. And, of course, Ben McCarthy is tasked with tearing his father away from a woman for whom he’s forsaken everything, and returning him to his rightful home.
"No matter how you boil it down, it's all storytelling." Frank Delaney Which raises the question: when these quietly epic moments occur in life, what is the lesson? What does one stand to gain in recognizing those patterns? “If I’m looking to deliver a message, I’ll call Fed Ex — but there is nonetheless a sense in which I feel very strongly that there is a mobilization of youth that could now, if it happened, benefit life in general, enormously. And it’s not happening, and I think it’s because people are so incredibly worried about their futures, and where they’re going to earn their living, and so on and so forth,” he says. “You’ve seen in this country, in the last eighteen months, a most extraordinary change, where a young man — and nobody ever refers to this — where a young man became president. And he’s a young man in every way. He goes out shooting hoops with his pals, even in the White House. He’s a youthful figure. It is the time when youth has to wake up, again. “Several years ago, I was invited to speak in a fine university in Scotland. A traditional university that leans very heavily to the left. Margaret Thatcher was in power, which changed everything. And she was a complete and utter disaster for England in terms of education. When I went there and addressed them, I found that the student body had moved completely to the right. I said to them, Why are you doing this? And they said, Because when you’re in left-wing politics here, and you go for a job interview after you graduate, there’s a very strong chance that you won’t get a job. And I thought, what are we doing to our children?”
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While working for the BBC in London, Delaney created and hosted a radio show called Word of Mouth, which, he says now, “stemmed entirely from my own fascination with the English language.” On days when he was slated to record the show, he woke up in the wee hours from sheer excitement. “We used to do extraordinary things. We’d go to a soccer match in France, and we’d hear the various chants, and the curses the players were hurling at one another, and that the crowds were hurling at the players, and we’d trace the roots of that. And some of [the expressions] went back to sixteenth century France! It’s a kind of ongoing treasure trove. It was a fabulous existence doing that show,” he says. He speaks “menu French” and “menu Italian”, and used to broadcast in Gaelic. He’s also kept up with the Latin he learned in school, and does his own translations whenever necessary. But it’s the English language that has his heart. “For pleasure, I will always read the dictionary. And what’s even better is a dictionary of etymology, where you get the actual root of the word, and you see where the word came from. That’s great fun. When I die, one of my few regrets will be that I will no longer be able to use the English language. That’s what I’d be thinking about while I’m dying — one of the things, as well as missing my loved ones — I’d be thinking, Goddamnit! I’m now going to a place where there won’t be any language!” Currently, his contract with Random House specifies one novel per year until 2012. He’s working his way chronologically through Ireland’s twentieth century; Venetia Kelly’s Traveling Show leaves off in 1932, and he’s just recently finished its sequel, The Matchmaker of Kenmare. As his characters are fond of saying, if you need something done, ask a busy man. But Delaney shrugs off the suggestion that he’s doing anything unusual. “It keeps me off the streets and out of the bars,” he laughs.
For more of Frank: web: frankdelaney.com twitter: @FDbytheword (Follow him for daily writing tips!)
HAPPINESS
IS A DIRECTION, NOT A PLACE
~ SYDNEY J. HARRIS
Be sure to come back to this page in every issue of Delish for the MOST delish books on craft, decor and more..
LIVE: MAKE
Feel like getting your craft on but aren’t sure where to start? Don’t pick up that needle and thread, crochet hook, or stencil and sponge without first spending an afternoon getting inspired by these excellent reference books with great projects, patterns and pictures. w WRITTEN BY TAMARA KOMUNIECKI
STITCHING Material Obsession: Modern Quilts with Traditional Roots Written by Kathy Doughty and Sarah Fielke / Published by Stewart, Tabori & Chang To me there’s not much better than snuggling under a quilt with a sleeping baby on my chest and dog at my feet, and if I just happen to have sewn that quilt? Positively heavenly. The one my boys and I are enoying in this picture was an amateur first attempt but, even with still will always hold a special place in my heart! I now aspire to work on the amazing creations in this book, and you can be sure I’ve started stockpiling fabric already. Favorite projects among the pages of Material Obsession are the Cowboy Baby and Rocket Man quilts. (Can you see a baby boy theme here? I hope my guys are ready for the serious cuddling that’s coming up!)
w From $16.47 at amazon.com
Handmade Beginnings: 24 Projects to Welcome Baby Written by Anna Maria Horner / Published by Wiley A lot of the fabric in my aforementioned stash is designed by Anna Maria Horner, one of the most talented textile designers around. I fell just a little more in love with her in the first few pages of Handmade Beginnings. Her introductory note illustrated her dedication to family and home — a woman after my own heart. The book is organized into sections, featuring ideas dedicated to Mama, Baby, Family and Nest projects: from apparel and a bag for Mom to booties and a sleep sack for baby; a bag for Dad; and a nap pillow and wall art for baby’s room. I could happily make every item in this book either for myself or as gifts (which might be the only way I can use up all of that fabric!).
w $24.99 at store.annamariahorner.com
For more on Anna Maria Horner, visit annamariahorner.com.
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Make sure to read our Fall 2010 Delish feature story with Anna Maria as part of our profile on female textile designers, called Women of the Cloth.
KNITTING
Men’s Knits – 20 New Classics Written by Erika Knight / Published by Potter Craft You’re going to want to pick this one up, even if you’re not a knitter, because while the projects may well be something you’ll want to make for a man in your life, the first thing you’ll notice is the eye candy!! Just, um, wow. Hello handsome, on each page. A VERY smart strategy, Potter Craft publishing! Ahem. Now then. On to the knitting. Author Erika Knight started out in the fashion industry as a menswear designer and went on to work as a consultant for brands like J. Crew and Gap, and the pages of Men’s Knits are a testament to her fashion chops and her own style sensibility. The techniques are spot on (at least my favorite knitting expert, AKA Mom, says so). And best of all, the sweaters, scarves and hats in the book are, each and every one of them, pieces I would love to see on my dad, my husband, and my son. (And don’t forget those models…). $14.95 at amazon.com
STENCILING OUR READERS HAVE THEIR SAY ON TWITTER @Cheryl_Arkison Bend the Rules with Fabric Written by Amy Karol Published by Potter Craft
Easy, fast projects. Creative! Different mediums to try. Wonderful sense of humour. Energetic.
w $21.95 at
randomhouse.com Handmade Home Written by Amanda Soule (@AmandaSoule) Published by Trumpeter.
Touching and soulful. Simple projects to honour history and family. Always great writing.
w $15.37 at shambhala.com
@madfabriholic loved sock innovation by cookie a… Published by Interweave
the patterns are FAB, +the explanations re:how she designs the socks are really clear. Have already made 2 pr.
w $15.61 at amazon.com
Stencil 101 Decor Written by Ed Roth Published by Chronicle Books Less book; more a how-to with stencils supplied, this package will educate and inspire you to spruce up your space with stencils. I really love how it starts—the front cover exclaims in upper case: “DESIGN AND STYLE DO NOT HAVE TO COST A LOT OF MONEY. PERIOD.” Amen to that! Favorite stencils in the portfolio are Birds On A Wire, Hexagon, Dot To Dot and Quatrefoil, but there’s really something for everyone interested in embellishing and personalizing both home and office.
w $24.95 at chroniclebooks.com
ENTERTAINING
French General: Handmade Soirées Simple Projects for Special Occasions Written by Kaari Meng / Published by Chronicle Books This book begins with a dedication: To friends and family who have taught me to create, cook, and celebrate. Personally, those are three of my favorite activities and so I knew I’d not only pick up great ideas from it, but also enjoy this book as a read. Take the first chapter, Petit Déjeuner. It starts out with directions on how to make the perfect cup of coffee, and proceeds to give directions for embroidered jam covers, egg berets (tiny, wonderfully fanciful berets for your eggs) and a fabric-covered recipe box. You can get directions for poached eggs and Hollandaise sauce anywhere, but these ideas help to set the stage for the perfect meal or party. Written by the owner of French General, other chapters focus on the perfect tea party, outdoor soirée and more. A gorgeous party-planning starting point!
w $29.95 at chroniclebooks.com
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DIY
LIVE: MAKE Hip Date Night Clutch w WRITTEN BY ALEXIS MESCHI
My
husband and I go on dates every couple weeks, and I was so tired of taking my big mommy bag out with me. I wanted something smaller and a little more stylish, so I decided to make a clutch out of old t-shirts. Follow along with me to make your own!
1
Start with a t-shirt — it can be old, new, whatever you want. I used this cool newsprint-look tank that I had.
2 Next, cut two pieces from the shirt, each measuring 8" x 13". (Alternately, you can go with a custom size here.)
3 Now you need something that will make your clutch sturdy. I used some old denim — you can use sweatshirt material, interfacing, or anything that is heartier and will give it some structure. Cut two pieces, each 8" x 13".
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Take the remaining part of the shirt (the part of the print that you like most) and cut it into strips. They can be any size. You’ll need quite a few of them.
4
5
Now we’re going to make the front of the clutch. Layer your fabrics with the thick one on the bottom, then your t-shirt layer on top.
Start taking your strips and randomly stitching them all over the front of the clutch with a straight stitch.
6
7 Just keep adding and stitching overlapping layers as you go…
8 … until your entire piece is covered with lots of layers of texture.
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I like to go back and stitch any hanging pieces so they are all matted down nicely.
9
10
Now we’re going to assemble the main body of the clutch. Get your other pieces of fabric and put the thick side down first, the other t-shirt piece right side up, then lay your front clutch piece on right side down.
11
Pin it all together. Sew the sides and bottom together, leaving the top unstitched. Turn it right side out.
12 Now for the lining! Take two pieces of fabric, 8" x 13". Have fun with the lining — it’s like a bag’s secret identity! I used this Lady of Guadalupe handkerchief I had.
Before you sew the piece together, you can add any size pocket to the lining, if you’d like.
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13 Take your two pieces and, right sides facing, sew the sides and bottom together. Leave the top open. Insert your clutch into your lining.
Make sure that the clutch is securely in the lining. Pin it in place all the way around.
14 15
Stitch it closed, leaving a 3-inch opening at the top center of the BACK SIDE of the clutch.
Pull the clutch through the opening.
17
16
Where you have your opening in the back get a piece of thin elastic 4.5 inches long. Fold it in half and insert it in to the opening. Pin it in place. This will be the elastic closure that holds the button. spring/summer 2010
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Stitch it closed and topstitch all the way around the clutch.
18
On the front side of the clutch, measure three inches down the front and center and sew a button in place.
19 20 Now you’ve got a stylish clutch made from recycled materials!
You can use all sorts of fun fabric. I did this striped one that is one of my favorites!
There are endless possibilities with all the amazing tees out there! There are many more variations on the t-shirt clutch like these‌
... AND FOR MORE GREAT PROJECTS,
VISIT MADEBYLEX.COM!
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LIVE: GROW
Finding your Inner w WRITTEN BY STEVIE ROSE
A guide to getting your own green thumb.
I adore beautiful plants. My garden is chock-full of them, looking like little gems, all gleaming aubergine and cherry and tangerine at different times of the year. So when I happened by a photo of a beautiful backyard potager boasting ornamental vegetables, fruit trees and herbs all intermixed with gorgeous dahlia blooms, coneflowers and wisteria vines, it was love at first sight. My image of an ordered country vegetable plot tended to by an overall-clad farmer was immediately replaced by one of a chic urbanite showing off her bounty of freshly-picked produce. With a little research (browsing through local garden centres and seed catalogs), I quickly realized that rainbow chard and beetroot don’t only look good together on the dinner plate. I dug up the perennial beds surrounding my back patio and replaced half of the showy blooms with gorgeous veggie plants like Dragon Tongue beans and Pizza My Heart peppers. That summer, the patio looked just as beautiful as the previous year, required no extra tending to, and as a bonus, gave me a gourmet produce section right in my backyard. It’s been a few years now since edibles have joined my small urban garden. The whole things is incredibly addicting. While the garden is still filled with flowers
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Rouge d'Hiver lettuce in wine barrel planter and ornamental trees, I’ve found it’s more rewarding to plant a trellis with Purple Peacock pole beans than a flowing vine. Hanging baskets overflow with Tumbling Tom tomatoes and yellow alpine strawberry plants can be seen in many a nook and cranny. I take great pleasure when a neighbour asks, “Is that a cabbage?” with both awe and delight at the interesting, leafy, red globe nestled in the front border of a garden that still looks unabashedly ornamental.
Getting Started
Whether you have a small balcony or a sprawling acreage, you too can tap into your inner farmer without a dedicated vegetable bed. Here are a few projects to get you going:
Balcony Blues
Don’t be blue if your only outdoor space is a balcony, patio or small deck; it’s the perfect spot to grow your own salad bowl. If you have a spot with eight hours or more a day of sun in the summertime, fill plastic planters (or a large salad bowls) with cherry tomato, basil, parsley, lettuce and pepper plants and keep them well watered during the summer heat. If you get a bit less
and failures, I’ve learned to work with the environment, rather than against it. Cold crops in California or heat lovers on the North Coast are just not going to produce fruits for your labor. Save the frustration and follow these tips on how to choose the best edibles to grow wherever you live. First, pick vegetables, fruits, or herbs that work specifically in your climate. Check local seed companies and garden centers and ask what will grow successfully in your area. Or take a walk around your neighborhood on a sunny Saturday and ask local gardeners for advice. I have yet to meet a gardener who wouldn’t happily answer every one of my questions if I just walked up and asked. Heck, I usually get a full garden tour and a handful of fresh blueberries to take home with me, along with my wealth of information. Espalier Apple Fence sun, leafy lettuce and spinach plants will do just fine. They love a little shade as their large leaves soak up the sun very efficiently. In fact, too much sun will make them want to bolt (rapidly set flower) in the heat of summer.
Urban Fare
If you live in the city and use every square inch of your garden for flowers, entertaining, and outdoor living, then why not plant blueberry bushes instead of boxwood, or tuck your vegetables right into the flower beds? Radicchio and red cabbage look lovely nestled in a front border. Or try inter-planting onions, leeks, chives and garlic between the blooms. You’ll find that flowering chives’ purple pom poms are right at home in any flower garden—and as a bonus they ward away some of the pests hoping to snack on your treasured ornamentals.
Living Large
Have a large space but want to ease into edible gardening? Plant a living fruit fence. Many fruit trees can be grown as espaliers, in which the branches are trained into a single-plane pattern along a fence creating beautiful garden dividers that make harvesting easy as pie. Pick out fruit trees that grow well in your area, choosing espaliers if you can find them, or dwarf varieties of your favourite apple, pear, olive or fig (and make sure to buy fruit trees in pairs to ensure proper pollination). Plant each tree at least two feet apart on the sunny side of a fence and prune the tree so that the branches remaining are two-dimensional, reaching left and right. Secure the branches to the fence and water well the first season until established. Yearly pruning will keep your living fence beautiful and productive for many years to come.
What to Grow
The vegetables that I grow are well suited for my Zone 8 garden in Vancouver, Canada. After many successes
Next, pick what you love but can’t readily buy at your grocery store or farmers market, like Cheddar cauliflower, Aunt Molly’s Ground Cherries, or Filius Blue hot peppers. Kids will revel in broccoli if it is purple and it’s a joy to pull a carrot if you don’t know if it will be red, purple, orange, or white! Finally, be mindful of your gardening conditions when picking your seeds or starter plants. If you have full hot sun with little rainfall, pick drought-tolerant and heatloving varieties of peppers, eggplants, tomatoes and fennel. If you have some shade in the afternoon you’ll be primed for a summer lettuce and herb bed. If you only have a balcony or small deck, pick up dwarf cultivars or varietals marked especially for good production in containers. You may find these will actually do better in containers, as is the case with Fairy Tale eggplants, who so love having their roots kept warm in a pot that they’ll thank you with an abundance of the best pink and green striped eggplant you’ve ever tasted.
Reaping the Rewards
There is no question that growing your own groceries is good for you. Getting your hands in the dirt, making delish food from a tiny seed and harvesting nutrientrich produce in your own backyard is healthy for body and soul. Gardening with kids helps the new generation learn where food truly comes from and gets them excited to gobble up every strawberry in sight. Even the finicky eaters can be coaxed into eating their greens when they take part in the planting, watering and harvesting of beans or peas right off the vine. For me, the joy is in the beauty that welcomes you home after a long day, the pop of a cherry tomato fresh off the vine, and the endless reward of dinner made truly from scratch. To read more on gardening, you can visit me at: web: gardentherapy.ca twitter: @garden_therapy
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LIVE: GROW
I Really
Dig My...
We in the the northern hemisphere are in that lovely twilight season between spring and summer, where the days are finally getting to be long enough to actually set foot into the garden after work, and weekends are dedicated to nurturing little seedlings. It’s time to take stock of your old rusty rakes and spades with the broken handle. While you’re out replacing the garden implements you forgot outside over the winter or checking out what newfangled devices have come on the market this year, consider these ideas from people with the greenest thumbs of all.
w WRITTEN BY TAMARA KOMUNIECKI “It’s called a ‘Cut-and-Hold’ pruner. Unlike other pruners, this one holds the stem you cut until you release it. Hence you can prune a climbing rose or most other kind of plant, and instead of just letting the cut twigs or flowers fall to the ground making for a big clean-up job, you can simply drop them into your yard waste container or other receptacle. The pruners come in two sizes. The telescopic model extends from 4 to 6 feet long, and when I use it to deadhead my climbing roses, even a shrimp like me can reach spent flowers 15 feet high. It cuts branches up to 3/8 inches wide and is easy to use weighing only 30 ounces. The short version is 2 ft long, and weighs only 14 oz. It’s great for deadheading roses without having to reach in and get stuck by the prickers, but I find I use it all the time to deadhead perennials in my overcrowded mixed border. It’s great to be able to remove dead flowers and diseased foliage without having to stomp around in the garden which can cause compaction and result in flattened plants. The bad news is that these tools are only available on the web at wildflower-seed.com. The short pruner costs $52 plus $3 shipping, and the telescopic model rings in at $73 plus $4 shipping. They are available at the Northwest Flower and Garden Show, but even if you have to send for them, when you see how useful these outstanding tools are you’ll be more than glad that you forked out the bucks to buy them."
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Submitted by Ciscoe Morris, from Gardening With Ciscoe email: ciscoe@ciscoe.com web: ciscoe.com
Seattle’s Ciscoe Morris is a regular garden celebrity — he has a weekly radio show “Gardening with Ciscoe”and also appears on numerous TV shows including “Gardening with Ciscoe” which he co-hosts with Meeghan Black.
“CobraHead’s claim to fame is as “The Best Tool In Earth” and I have to agree – winner of the best tool in my garden hands down. It functions almost as an extended finger, digging weeds out of awkward spots, like in between flagstone and sidewalk cracks. Because the handle is made from recycled polypropylene mixed with flax fiber, the Cobrahead is fairly sustainable and a great idea for your garden.” Submitted by Shawna Lee Coronado – author, newspaper columnist, blogger, and speaker centered on teaching and living a green lifestyle. Her critically acclaimed simple living guide, Gardening Nude, inspires readers to help community and get healthy. Learn more about Shawna’s blogs and eco-adventures at thecasualgardener.com.
“Umbrella Greenhouses. These handy umbrella greenhouses can be invaluable in any garden throughout the year. Whether you need an instant cold frame for tender seedlings, want to cloche heat-loving young plants like tomatoes or eggplants, or just want to keep pests away when plants are most vulnerable, these clear plastic greenhouses pop up instantly to do the trick. Bonus, they have zippered air vents for those smouldering hot days and they store easily.” at stokestropicals.com w $27.95 $29.99 at amazon.com Stevie Rose gardentherapy.ca twitter: @garden_therapy
w $19.95 at amazon.com
You can see Shawna’s video on the Cobrahead by clicking here!
“The new garden gadget that I like is the Basket Booster Self Watering System. It is a revolutionary self watering system for hanging baskets that uses 70% less water and is one of the best that I’ve seen. It works on a pressure system to only water when the basket dries out.” Brian Minter Country Garden Ltd. & Minter Gardens mintergardens.com Listeners to CBC Radio are probably familiar with plant expert Brian Minter’s great advice on garden-related subjects. He is also an author and speaker, and a veritable walking encyclopedia about all things green.
“It is my pleasure to suggest the Easy Arranger. After all your experts have shown your readers how to grow the best ever flowers… this little gem makes life very simple for those challenged by floral design. They are made in the USA and I love mine. I can just go to my garden, pick a few flowers, leaves and twigs and it always looks great! It is a great little product, the beauty is in its simplicity! They retail from $7.95. Visit easyarranger.com.” Submitted by Fern, from Fern’s Garden American Artisan & Fair Trade Gifts 5308 E. 2nd Street #B Long Beach, CA fernsgarden.com
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LIVE: EAT
w WRITTEN BY
w ILLUSTRATION BY CYNTHIA FRENETTE
SHELBY CHAMBERS
The
most inspiring aspect of a local farmers market is that which it is not: a grocery store. Selection is determined entirely by the season, as well as what can realistically be grown in your neck of the woods that time of year. But with the right state of mind and some creativity, this limitation can help to foster an appreciation for fresh produce, and provide an opportunity for you to be an impromptu recipemaker extraordinaire. I was reminded of this reality at my first farmers market visit of the year during the last week in January. I grabbed my reusable shopping bag that morning with every intention to fill it with corn, avocados, and toma-
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toes that I would chop and season to be some kind of southwestern succotash to top tacos or tamales. What I found was that only one vendor was selling tomatoes — small, $4.99 a pound ones at that — and there wasn’t a corn husk in sight. That’s when we shoppers have to let go of the unnatural habits major grocery stores have fostered in us, with their magical fruits and vegetables of uniform shape and size that mysteriously appear in refrigerated cases, year-round, without a trace of the farm they came from. Corn and tomatoes are summer vegetables, a fact I might have never been privy to had I stuck to swiping my club card at big name stores in my
native and weather-less California. Expectations happily dashed, I proceeded to buy what looked delicious and cheap, or that might complement what I already had available in my pantry. I grabbed some beautiful Chinese broccoli, a delicious and unusual vegetable that you don’t always find at grocery stores. Typically sold in $1.00 bunches, the leaves are softer, like a bunch of fresh herbs, with tiny broccoli sprouts tucked inside. They are delicious tossed in any type of stir fry, or on their own with a bit of sesame oil or oyster sauce. Waiting for my order of lamb shwarma to come up at the crêpe booth, I noticed a vendor offering generously-sized bunches of swiss chard in a deep green so perfect it should have been wallpaper. For a dollar I was able to get several massive leaves of chard, which can be used as a wilted green in any recipe that typically calls for spinach. Finally, while buying an asian pear I spotted an unusual looking green vegetable I had not seen before. It resembled a firm pear the color of a granny smith apple, but instead of a rounded bottom it had a weird seam that puckered back into its body. Market vendors are usually keen to explain more about their produce, and this one explained that the weird green thing was a Chayote Squash, (also referred to as a Christophen Squash), and that it could be prepared as you would zucchini or cucumber. Skeptical but intrigued, I added it to my bag, thinking I could toss it with some other veggies in whatever I ended up cooking for dinner that week. What always follows, on the drive home from the market, is a mixture of imagination, improvisation, and ingredient problem solving that is the planning of the week’s dinner menu. The challenge is to come up with dinners that show off the amazing farmers market greenery, without having to buy a ton of other ingredients, or allow any of the bounty to go to waste. These dishes would also have to be quick to prepare and simple enough to execute after a long day of work, without being boring old meat and potatoes that we’ve all grown bored of eating and cooking. But if you’re a girl with a giant bag of fresh, interesting vegetables, you’ll almost be able to smell the meals by the time you get home. My solution: gnocchi and vegetables, followed by red curry with the same vegetables over basamati rice, and finally pizza with the leftover vegetables. Onions go well in anything, the squash was versatile enough, and the bitter chard would be a great texture contrast in both the gnocchi and curry.
As it turns out, I didn’t even like the weird bright green squash, it was like eating a warm cucumber honeydew melon with the crunch of an apple, (not to turn you off from it if you ever spot one on your next trip to the farmers market). But, I wouldn’t have sampled this interesting vegetable had I been shopping for veggies at the same place I buy my toothbrush, nor would I have had that gorgeous and nutrient-packed swiss chard that practically begged me to buy it. The beauty of the farmers market also lies in its individual experience; what I found there last week I might not find this week, making hard and fast recipes a bit impractical, and contrary to the spirit of the whole undertaking. That said, and just in case the beautiful produce isn’t inspiration enough, my rather unspecific recipes follow.
Weeknight Vegetable and Chicken Gnocchi Instead of boiling the gnocchi like one might usually cook pasta, I gave them a quick saute in some olive oil and salt, just until they were a bit golden on the outside, then set aside. Using the same pan, saute all the farmers market finds: mushrooms, squash, onion, and chicken in olive oil and a splash of wine, thyme, rosemary, finished with a touch of cinnamon. When this mixture is sufficiently cooked, add about a quarter cup to half a cup of chicken stock, half a can of crushed tomatoes, and the chopped swiss chard. Everything is tossed together to serve with a sprinkle of parmesan.
Vegetable Curry
The curry can be just as simple. Saute whatever vegetables you have in a bit of olive oil, and toss with a red curry sauce, or mix your own from curry powder. You can often find naan bread or some other comparable Mediterranean style breads at farmers markets, or you can splurge at a regular store. I used a precooked basamati rice pouch to save time, but you can serve over any preferred style of rice.
Whatever-Veggies-Are-Left Pizza
The vegetable pizza was straightforward enough. I try to keep pre-made dough in the freezer for those nights when only pizza will do, and who doesn’t have some type of cheese and a jar of sauce lying around. While the mix of remaining vegetables gets a quick browning on the stove, preheat the oven and roll out the pizza dough. Assemble, bake, and finish for a few short minutes in the broiler to get that chewy yet crisp brick oven style crust. With some extra chili flakes and that mixture of farmers market vegetables, you probably won’t miss the pepperoni.
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LIVE: NEST
Apron On
w WRITTEN BY EMMA ALVAREZ GIBSON w PHOTO BY SARAH HARRINGTON The last thing I was going to become when I grew up was a homemaker. I watched my mom work full-time, do most of the cooking, and all of the cleaning, and I found the imbalance offensive. The most efficient way, it seemed to me, to avoid that situation, was obvious: if I never learned to cook, I’d never be stuck with so heavy a load. (Oh, the logic may seem lacking, in hindsight, but to a second-grader, it was airtight. Airtight, I tell you!) I wasn’t planning on starving. I could make quesadillas and sandwiches. I could boil pasta. But actually cooking something — combining skill with creativity to create something tasty? No. It was fine for a long time; all throughout my 20s, in fact. After that, especially after marrying a man who is an excellent cook and derives a lot of creative pleasure from cooking, it began to rankle me. I’m wildly creative; why wasn’t I having that kind of fun? But also — as long as I’m being honest — it stung that my Uber-masculine husband reigned supreme in what’s traditionally the most feminine room in the house.
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w © ANNE TAINTOR, INC.
GETTING MY
As it happened, I’d been reading foodie blogs for a couple of years prior. I learn best via osmosis, so it wasn’t too big a leap from reading to doing. And I discovered something kind of crazy: using a recipe actually worked. I could, you know, like, make stuff. I discovered something else, too: the act of planning and cooking a meal for my family is so much more than a job that needs doing. It’s one more way to tell them I love them. It’s a way of blessing them. How intimate the act of eating is! When we set a meal down in front of someone, a meal we’ve created with our minds, hearts and hands in unity, it’s a sacred thing. It’s an offering we give of ourselves. And they, in turn, must show a deep level of trust to acknowledge this offering and ingest it, accept it into their mouths, into their singular bodies.
"I wasn’t planning on starving. I could make quesadillas and sandwiches." Emma Alvarez Gibson Slowly, I made a third discovery: all of homemaking belongs to this category of offering. When I make my home clean and inviting, I’m telling my family that I think they’re worthy. I’m also blessing our home and our belongings. I’m honoring who we are, what we’ve worked for, what we’ve been blessed with. I’m being a good steward.
This all blew my mind. But it made perfect sense, and it changed everything for me. And, judging from the boom of homemaking and crafting books, magazines, websites and TV shows making the rounds, it’s clear that plenty of other women have found themselves on a similar path. “I’ve always loved creating — but the thing of homemaking — how do I say this? Homemaking on purpose (as opposed to sewing curtains because I couldn’t buy te ones I wanted, or making dinner because kids bitch if you don’t feed them) is new to me,” says Karen Caterson (squarepegpeople.com), a writer based in Philadelphia. “When I was a kid, there was a huge gap between what I saw as two opposing sides. There were housework-doing folks (mostly relatives) who joylessly did house stuff and judged those who didn’t — and then there was my house, where (at least according to those relatives) none of that essential stuff was done. To me, it felt like either you gave a crap about home stuff, or you thought. Since I could think, that was the side of the fence I sat on.” Add to that the 1980s icon of the power-suited businesswoman, who often said things like, “Oh, I’m great at ordering in,” with a smirk that implied she was simply too smart and too important to cook, and it’s no wonder many of us grew up with disdain for the domestic arts. Hey, if it’s a choice between earning a living and mastering a skill that won’t pay the rent, it’s not much of a choice at all, is it? But at what point does the rejection of a practical skill set, one that most humans will need to engage at some point, go from being liberated to silly? I grew up believing my career was massively important to my self-development, and that the homemaking bits would take care of themselves. Somehow. (I’m still kind of fuzzy on how,
exactly.) Well, one out of two ain’t bad, I guess. And while my work/ housekeeping schedule is a sad and limping study in inefficiency, I’m working on it. Making up for lost time, as it were. “Homemaking is essential in life, even if you don’t do it full-time,” says Amanda Farough (violetminded.com), a web designer and developer in British Columbia. “Not only is it an adventure in time management, (in)sanity, and multitasking, but it allows a person to really be in touch with the Zen nature of house and home.” While I don’t believe in the overused term “work/life balance” (because give me a break, there’s no such thing as balance — there’s just your life, and that’s what it is), I do believe that my life has several through-lines. And one of them is mindfulness. Wherever I am, I try to be all there. I fail at this often, but it’s always my intent. If I’m ignoring or discrediting this very fundamental part of living, how can I possibly be living up to my full potential? Oh, I’m not saying everyone was born to be Domesticon, Organizer of Home and Fighter of Stains, not at all. But there are certain things we all need to know how to do, and being a good steward of my home — the place where my most cherished loved ones live — seems like an important thing to know how to do. “Now I see homemaking as heart-centered — making a “nest” for oneself, for loved ones and guests," says Caterson. “And I realize that you CAN have an IQ over 47 and still like to have things welcoming and lovely.”
LIVE: READ
CAt'S
C G O N R i N D ER •• A E •• R w WRITTEN BY CATHERINE BASSO
Welcome to my reading corner! In every issue, I’ll aim to inspire you to pick up a book and read. (Can’t you just smell all those books waiting for you?) For the premiere issue, I thought we’d start strong by featuring Geneen Roth’s Women, Food and God.
T his book is not about diets, weight loss or weight gain. It’s not about finding your inner child or burying your painful past. It is a book about the way we eat. Roth believes that the way we eat reflects our core beliefs about being alive; that, in fact, our relationship with with food is an exact mirror of our feelings about love, fear, anger, meaning, transformation — and God. When you identify your relationship to food, she says, you will identify your own freedom. “Awareness, not deprivation, informs what you eat,” Roth writes. “Presence, not SHAME, changes how you see yourself and what you rely on. When you stop struggling, stop suffering, stop pushing and pulling yourself around food and your body, when you stop manipulating and controlling, when you actually realize and listen to the truth of what is there, something bigger than your fear will catch you. With repeated experiences of opening and ease, you learn to trust something infinitely more powerful than a set of rules that someone else made up: YOUR OWN BEING.”
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Women, Food and God is filled with great insights that could be applied to any number of issues. Roth writes about embracing, rather than running from, life’s disappointments, and about embracing ourselves as we are, rather than perpetuating the Western pattern of fetishizing an impossibly high standard. “When you believe without knowing you believe that you are damaged at your core, you also…doubt your own impulses so you become masterful at looking outside yourself for comfort. You become an expert at finding experts and programs, at striving and trying hard and then harder to change yourself, but this process only reaffirms what you already believe about yourself — that your needs and choices cannot be trusted, and left to your own devices you are out of control,” she writes. As you may well have gathered, this is neither a quick nor an easy read. And it is absolutely worth your while.
w $13.20 on Amazon.com
CAT’S QUICK PICKS FOR SPRING & SUMMER
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
Lucky by Alice Sebold This book is Sebold’s memoir, recounting her brush with death during her first year of college. She was raped by a stranger while walking home to her dorm and was one of the few woman who was able to take her attacker to court and see him prosecuted. An amazing, gutsy account of a horrible experience, and the life that comes after such times. (Fans of Sebold will appreciate that this book became the starting point for her novel The Lovely Bones.)
w $9.35 on Amazon.com
Prodigal Summer by Barbara Kingsolver Prodigal Summer tells three interweaving stories of love, loss and family, against the backdrop of the lush wilderness of Kentucky mountains, during a particularly hot summer. Deanna is a solitary woman working as a park ranger. A widowed farmwife, Lusa, is at odds with her late husband’s tight-knit family. Garnett is an old man, dreaming of restoring the lineage of the extinct American Chestnut tree. An unlikely trio, perhaps; you’ll be drawn in and won’t want to stop reading. Consider it summer vacation for your mind.
w $10.19 on Amazon.com The Book of Negroes by Lawrence Hill The Book of Negroes follows the life of Aminta Diallo, taken by slavers from her African village story at age eleven. Surviving the brutal overseas journey to the American Colonies, she is able to continue surviving, thanks to the education and midwifery skills provided by her parents, who were killed. Unflinching and ultimately uplifting, this historical novel is a must-read, likely to prompt you into some research. (Its title is taken from an actual document. The Book of Negroes was a British military ledger that recorded the names and details of about 3000 black Loyalists who were allowed to leave the American territory for Canada.)
w From $22.97 on Amazon.com What are you telling all your friends to read these days? What authors are rocking your world? Drop me a line and let me know what you’re reading! Love and light, Cat
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LOOK: SHINE
E≈ible
Beauty w WRITTEN BY GILLIAN YOUNG
T
hese days, I’m much more likely to be found in a gourmet supermarket than in Sephora. But I love beauty products, and going homemade marries two of my favorite things. (I also love the idea of being able to make myself gorgeous by throwing together a few fresh ingredients that I could lick from my fingers if I wanted to. You know. Theoretically.) There are tons of benefits to using homemade beauty products: they’re all-natural, better for the environment, surprisingly convenient, use less packaging and are much gentler on your skin than most commercial products (i.e., no gross chemicals and preservatives). With all that in mind, I found a recipe for a honey apple face mask and an avocado face mask, both claiming to help reduce oiliness. I put these edible beauty masks to the test to see if they could help my city girl skin.
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Honey Apple Face Mask Ingredients: 1/2 a shredded apple 4 Tbsp honey This one got put to use after a long day at work. Apples contain glycolic acid, which is a natural exfoliator. Honey calms the skin and is a natural moisturizer. I grated up half of a red Gala apple and added four heaping teaspoons of honey. I could easily have eaten this as dessert, but I fed my face instead and slathered on the goopy concoction. Well, I definitely should have grated the apple much more finely, because none of it would stick to my face. (Taking advantage of my large nose, I perched some apple chunks on it, and just rubbed the rest of the mixture into my face as much as possible.) I left the sweet-smelling mask on for ten minutes before rinsing with warm water. I loved how natural this was, how delicious it smelled and how good my skin felt afterward. But the next day was the best part: my skin felt good enough to go foundation-free! (Another reward came in using the other half of that apple in some honey apple oatmeal for breakfast the next morning. Win-win.)
Psst!
Avocado Face Mask
Easy beauty-at-home tip: Use sugar as an exfoliant on your lips before applying gloss or lipstick. It’ll smooth out your lips and plump them up as well!
These recipes were found on skincarebeautyzone.com.
Ingredients: 1 avocado 1 egg white 1/2 lemon, freshly squeezed
The night after my honey apple face mask, I wasn’t feeling so hot. Long days at work and lack of sun were making my skin feel pretty blah, so I decided to try out an avocado face mask for a natural summery glow. Avocados are high in vitamins A & C, potassium, protein, iron and natural emollients. I try to eat them as often as possible for smooth skin and hair, so I was curious to see what benefits I’d get from a topical application. To start, I blended the avocado with an egg white and half a freshly squeezed lemon, in my blender. This was my first time putting avocado on my face, and I had a hard time not bringing some tortilla chips for dipping into the bathroom with the mask. (Thankfully, the raw egg white managed to deter me.) And as I urged the avocado-chunk fiesta to sit still on my skin, I realized I probably could have blended this one a little longer as well. But not to worry; most of the guacamole stayed on, barring one small chunk that just missed my keyboard while I waited the recommended twenty minutes for the mask to set. I rinsed it off with warm water, and admired my new greenish tint. Okay, I may not have rinsed well enough that first time. Use your best judgment. The next day, after my hot morning shower, my skin was glowing more than ever. I could still go for a good day at the beach in Mexico, but for now, a little guacamole on my face is a decent substitute.
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LOOK: SHINE
No Time to Shower? Take a Powder. w WRITTEN BY GILLIAN YOUNG
I’m not going to lie, I don’t shower every day. I’m a busy working woman and sometimes I’ll do anything for an extra half an hour in bed. Having thin hair as it is, this usually means I have to twist my hair into some kind of a braid or pathetic bun so that my co-workers can’t tell I’d rather sleep than shower. The fact that dark roots are growing out into my bright blonde hair doesn’t help. It wasn’t until I got my hands on some hair powder that I felt I could comfortably press the sleep button on my alarm clock. Hair powder is like a dry shampoo that you put into the roots of your hair to keep it looking clean. I put three of these cheap tricks to the test to see which would bring my limp locks to life on a lazy morning.
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BEFORE
AFTER
Bumble and bumble White Hair Powder
I feel like Marie Antoinette could have had this spray on her dressing table. The label of this powder tells me that powdering is a centuries-old technique that Bb session stylist Lauren Philippon made modern with these magic, multi-purpose sprays (they’re also available in black, brown and blondish). The packaging is indeed modern, and I almost felt like I was spray painting my hair as I sprayed some Bumble and bumble into my tired locks. After a quick spray, it actually looked like I’d taken a white spray paint and coated my roots with it. But as directed, I allowed the spray to dry then brushed through it evenly, and voila, my hair had as much bounce and brightness as Miss Antoinette.
w $35 for 4oz. / bumbleandbumble.com Lulu Organics Organic Hair Powder
BEFORE
AFTER
The packaging on this powder is so simple and seductive I want to keep it on my make-up table just for decoration. This powder was the simplest of all three. It came in a shaker where you pour the powder onto your hands before rubbing it into your hair. I liked the ease of this, although I had to be careful not to spill it onto my black dress. I liked that this powder was organic and that the ingredients are natural but it still smells fantastic. Even better, it added just enough life back to my hair so that I could strut out onto the street proud of my organic, un-showered self.
w BEFORE
AFTER
$40 for 4.5oz, available in Lavender & Clary Sage, Patchouli and Amber, Jasmine and Tuberose scents $9.50 for 1oz Lavender& Clary Sage travel size / luluorganicsnyc.com
Buttercream Cosmetics Shampowder
This hair powder was the girliest of all. I loved the small, sleek, compact shape of this hair powder and that I could easily sneak it into my purse for desperate moments. I also appreciate the kitschy writing and pretty cartoon, because being a girl is meant to be fun! At first I thought this one would be difficult to use, but once I got going I loved the brush applicator which evenly distributed the powder to my roots. This hair powder has a luscious light vanilla scent to it and had the best results on my hair. Not only did it bring my hair back to life, but the mineral pigments brightened up my roots and made my blonde hair pop. While I loved all three, this one was definitely my favorite!
!
w $15.99 for 28oz / buttercreamcosmetics.com
So, okay, maybe I’m not squeaky-clean every single day. But I’m getting more shut-eye, and my hair looks and smells delicious. Two out of three is a definite win in this busy girl’s book. spring/summer 2010
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CARE: NURTURE Breastmilk on my Keyboard: The Adventures of a Lactating Journalist
WHAT THEY DIDN’T TELL ME ABOUT BECOMING A MOTHER w WRITTEN BY TAMARA KOMUNIECKI w ILLUSTRATION BY CYNTHIA FRENETTE
I REMEMBER THE NIGHT VIVIDLY. I was sitting on our couch and suddenly, I perceived a shift. Not in the physical sense, exactly, though it did throw me decidedly off-kilter, but the world around me had changed, completely. Or I had changed in it… at that moment I couldn’t tell the difference. I felt very small, kind of cold, frightened, and very, very ill-equipped for my new, huge responsibility. I felt he wasn’t safe, the little person sleeping upstairs who had just come home that day. We’d been through so much to get him there — our seven-week-old son, Finn. It turns out we were preparing for him long before he was even conceived. Eighteen months earlier, his brother Henry had been delivered nearly two months early, and stillborn (on Good Friday, of all days). I drifted around sort of like a ghost for months and months afterwards, a shadow of my former self who frankly, still thinks it’s a miracle someone can hurt so much and still keep breathing. In the days that followed the loss of Henry, my husband and I clung to whatever remained—which was, for us, each other. It was a quiet and precious time; bittersweet in that though I hadn’t thought it possible, our shared tragedy and heartbreak actually brought us closer together.
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You know when people say nothing is sacred anymore? We experienced the opposite. All was sacred, nothing was secret. My husband saw me screaming in labor, we wept ’til we could barely breathe, and we held our son together in our arms when he came into a world he had already left behind. Henry taught us a lot about my medical conditions. When I got pregnant again, the maternal/fetal specialist made sure I knew, at every visit, that there was a 50/50 chance we would have the same outcome with this pregnancy, and that there was a one percent chance of my own demise. But with a baby aspirin and two injections of blood thinners a day, along with regular check-ups from the specialist and nurturing love and care by my husband, we made it into the third trimester. We even managed to move back to Vancouver from California. And then all of a sudden, as these things happen, there we were again, going through an experience that practically mirrored Henry’s entrance and exit — with one massive difference helping us keep it all together: this baby was alive. At 28 weeks and five days, I went into early (no kidding) labor. The doctors tried to halt it, but I progressed fast and, about four hours after speeding to the hospital, I
gave birth to our second son, Finn. He came out “sunny side up”, and very quickly. He looked like a little tiny boxer, with his bruised face absolutely purple from his flattened nose to the top of his head. A team rushed him out of the room, and my husband and I were left there to fight the shock as it began setting in. Seven weeks of NICU care in two hospitals followed. At first Finn was hooked up to all manner of machinery. His breathing was assisted by a bulky CPAP unit with prongs in his nose. Leads and sensors stuck to his body detected problems with his blood oxygen saturation and heart rate. He had an IV (which was eventually changed to a PICC line), and he was fed by a tube going through his mouth into his tummy. When we wanted to hold him for the all-important “skin-to-skin” or “Kangaroo care”, we would navigate through (and often trip over) the several wires that connected his chest to a monitor. I pumped every three hours, and we celebrated all inputs and outputs: each little drop of milk taken in, and each little drop of poop going out. Then, eventually, we were able to feed him by bottle and breast. Once Finn was stronger, the nurses taught us how to bathe him and how and when to administer his iron and Vitamin D. We worked diligently, with the nurses who were breastfeeding specialists, on latching and on what holds would work best with my arthritic joints. I had the fears of any new parent — is he breathing at night, is he warm enough or cool enough, is he safe around the dog, and will the dog adjust to him (I couldn’t bear to consider losing another member of my family, human or canine)? But I also feared the loss of my independence — the ability to just pick up and go whenever or wherever we felt like it, because I as a single woman, and then we as a couple, did that on a regular basis. And I feared that though Finn needed me, maybe he didn’t know me as his mom. After all, despite the many hours I put in with him at the hospital, he spent more time with nurses. But those fears are not The Fear that slithered into my heart. No one told me about that fear. While we’d been advised on every baby-related topic fathomable, no one mentioned postpartum depression, or its mean little sister, postpartum anxiety. That, combined with the post-traumatic stress after everything we had been through, gave me a panic attack that thoroughly kicked my ass the first night Finn was home. It had its way with me for many nights in a row, actually, and I’m alternately overcome and embarrassed when I talk about it. Why embarrassed? Because I’m the one who isn’t afraid of very much at all. I’m the resourceful, the capable, the brave one — or so people tell me. But during that time, when the sun would set and darkness settled over the world outside, it came inside too. More than any of those fears, which had reason, this thing was utterly pervasive, and lacked reason. And
it was so, so deeply within me. So raw and so terribly all-encompassing. Internal voices asked, “What if…?” and I choked on thoughts of terrible things that might possibly happen to my son. Those dark hours were long. And then, by morning light, the fear would fade. Eventually, by spending my days with the incredibly resilient and buoyant spirit that is our son, those episodes subsided. Slowly, they became part of the background noise. I came to realize that I am indeed capable of taking care of Finn — of providing what he needs not just to grow, but to thrive. (He’s six-anda-half months old now, and tipping the scales at 18 pounds.) We have a heart connection, oh yes, we do. I feel blessed that Finn had an extended group of caregivers in the NICU nurses, and that we were able to learn so much from them. I feel a deep honor to be this little guy’s mom, and that the powers that be felt I was deserving and yes, capable. I can’t say it’ll never happen again. Once in a while The Fear taps on the window of my mind, and panic creeps in around the edges and catches in my throat. But it’s gotten easier. Or at least it’s changed, in its shape, texture, flavor, weight. It’s no longer an elephant that sits on my chest; it’s a buffalo, maybe. I’ve been able to take a step back and observe my gut reactions and feelings when things have gotten scary, and it turns out all along one has rung out even above The Fear, and that is The Love. There’s all kind of feelings that tumble out during the first six months of parenthood: bewilderment, inadequacy, utter joy, utter panic, deep hope. But it turns out that love really is the greatest of these.
ON MY COMPUTER SCREEN: babble.com modernmom.com momlogic.com survival4moms.com ON MY BOOKSHELF: The Survival Guide for Rookie Moms Written by: Erica Wells and Lorraine Regel Published by: Wiley $12.21 (USD) at Amazon.com
Free-Range Kids How to Raise Safe, Self-Reliant Children (Without Going Nuts with Worry) Written by: Lenore Skenazy Published by: Jossey-Bass $10.17 (USD) at Amazon.com
What You Read
May Change
Your Life w WRITTEN BY SOPHIE FERN
Every day, between ages five and eight, I lived a
book called Swallows and Amazons, which followed the sailing and camping adventures of six children on holiday in England’s Lake District. My sister and I would pitch our small brown tent in the back garden, and our dad would build a campfire pit where we would cook our supper. (Usually, “supper” was a mixture of blackened marshmallows mashed up with blackberries collected from the vacant lot next door, which to us was real explorer food.) We would snuggle into our old sleeping bags and listen to the strange nighttime sounds. I yearned for adventure, for my own boat, for an uninhabited island to explore — and for a cook who always had a spare slab of fruitcake that could be tucked into a rucksack, just in case. Then, of course, I grew up. But some months ago, watching dawn rise over the Chatham Islands, I thought of that book. Sitting on the back of a small fishing boat, on my way to work on an isolated island, it dawned on me that I hadn’t left my childhood dreams far behind at all. How strongly was I influenced by Swallows and Amazons? How much did that story fuel my interests and goals? And surely I couldn’t be the only grown woman left with such
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lasting impressions from kids’ lit? Naturally, I did what any rational woman would do: I took a poll. The results were unscientific, yes — but very telling nonetheless. Principles, hobbies, professions and fond memories were all borne of reading, or having been read, the right story at the right time. Jo, an English career counselor and theologian, believes that the characters we meet in childhood books strongly contribute to the adults we become. “They serve as a mirror, helping us to recognize ourselves, or to form the person we want to be — or show us how to avoid becoming someone that we don’t like. [We say] either ‘This is me’ or ‘This is not me.’” In fact, Jo counts Louisa May Alcott’s Little Women among her favorites, with its themes of kindness, independence and hard work. “Jo eating apples in the garret, writing stories and falling in love secretly and not caring how she looked — total role model,” she says. Abby, a geologist from New England, says that because of Little Women, “I am still explicitly acting on the idea that if you’re down or unhappy, you should go do something. Preferably for someone else.”
CARE: NURTURE For Kelly, who grew up in New Zealand, it was Trixie Belden books. The feisty, freckled heroine found exciting mysteries everywhere she turned — and solved them, too. Fueled by that sense of discovery and excitement, Kelly has since sailed around the world, and now directs documentaries. E.B. White’s Charlotte’s Web sparked Mildred’s first existential crisis.“It was one of the first books I read where really nasty things were going to happen to the main character — they were going to turn Wilbur into a bacon sandwich,” says the artist, who holds a PhD in beetle sex (truly!). “I see repeating themes of nature: escaping parents’ watchful eyes to have adventures in nature, and taking nature home to feed it dinner and pet it,” says Ruth, a marine biologist who adopts stray animals, of her favorite childhood books. So is it nature or nurture, then? Perhaps a combination of both? Who knows. But one thing’s for certain: literature opens up entire worlds for kids. Following are some suggestions for lighting the spark in your own children.
Diversify
Where would the world be without Astrid Lidgren’s Pippi Longstocking series, originally written in Swedish? If your child is American, try some British classics, with their lashings of ginger beer and jolly good times. English children could try Laura Ingalls Wilder’s Little House books. And everyone should give L.M. Montgomery’s Anne of Green Gables series a shot— proud Canadian or otherwise.
Dad’s bookshelf
I never would have read either Rudyard Kipling’s gripping adventure story Kim or the Swallows and Amazons books, had they not been on my Dad’s bookshelf. (Would I have become a hairdresser or something instead, I wonder?)
Non-fiction
— then non-fiction books are perfect. (A word of warning about biographies, however: one of the writers on staff received, when she was ten, the biography of a musician she admired. It contained a few scenes best described as inappropriate. Let’s just say they involved the exchange of money for very personal entertainment, and leave it at that.)
Comic books
I grew up in Belgium, where comic books are a national art form. Asterix, Tintin and the Smurfs are nationally recognized classics. More modern books include the hauntingly beautiful The Arrival by Shaun Tan, and the crude-but-hilarious Captain Underpants series. I have some terribly well-educated friends who say everthing they know about Roman times comes from reading Asterix comics!
Verse
Try nursery rhymes, limericks (the sillier the better), songs and poems. (I can still recite most of “The Midnight Ride of Paul Revere,” due to my Kiwi mother’s having read it to me as a child.)
“Grown-up” books
Remember, there was a time before the concept of children’s literature! Many classics are entirely appropriate for children of various ages. Beth was reading Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice by age eleven. “We actually used to play Pride and Prejudice, and we put on little plays for our parents to watch. I think it has influenced the very fabric of my existence,” she says. Other classics to consider: Margaret Mitchell’s Gone With the Wind, Gerald Durell’s My Family and Other Animals, and James Heriot’s All Creatures Great and Small. This winter I’m off to the Southern Ocean to spend a month on the Auckland Islands, cooking for a research cruise working on whales. It’ll take two days to get there by boat, and I’m taking my old, dog-eared copy of Swallows and Amazons with me for the journey. My inner eight-year-old will spend the entire month thrilled to bits that her dreams are finally coming true.
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w ILLUSTRATION BY CYNTHIA FRENETTE
CARE: FAMILY
Found family FOR THE
w WRITTEN BY TAMARA KOMUNIECKI & CYNTHIA MERRIMAN
Finally, an option for a breastfeeding mom who wants function AND fashion — that’s not too much to ask, now is it? Milkstars nursing shirts ($55-60) are cleverly designed, in super soft cotton and with a flattering fit. These are an infinitely more attractive option than what I was using before (a stack of tank tops that have seen better days), and can actually be worn in public. Better yet, they look like a regular top so you don’t have to announce your lactating status to the rest of the sometimes-squeamish world.
w milkstars.com
Mally Bibs ($33+) are a must-have for any parent whose kids love to wear their food! Handmade in Canada, Mally Bibs are durable, comfortable, reversible and adorable. Super easy to clean (a simple wipe with a cloth or a rinse will suffice), equipped with magnetic clasps (they can stick to the fridge, not in your kid’s hair!) and available in two sizes — baby and toddler. To make them even cooler, you can now design your own and have them customized with your child’s name!
w mallybibs.com
LIKEY These great soaps on popsicle sticks have us rewording the bathtime song: “Soapy Pop, you’re the one… you make bathtimes lots of fun… Soapy Pop I’m awfully fond of you…” Soapylove Soapy Pop soaps ($8) for kids are also free of the bad stuff like Sodium Lauryl Sulfate, and all fragrance oils are phthalate free.
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As most parents are on a quest for the perfect cure-all solution, the change table is usually stocked with an arsenal of supplies and diaper creams. Boudreaux's Butt Paste ($7+) might make one giggle just a wee bit, but this stuff is no joke. A blend of zinc oxide and Peruvian Balsam, it goes on thick and cleans off easily, treats and protects diaper rash and has a pleasant scent. And, we don’t need to tell you, that makes for one happy baby (and relieved parents).
w buttpaste.com
LIKEY From the brilliant minds at Dad Gear who brought you the Diaper Vest for dads on the go, comes a diaper bag that won’t cramp Papa’s style! From skull and flames to go with the weekend warrior look to basic black for business, and camo for everything in between. The basic bag is $82, with interchangeable flaps adding just $20. Handy features on the inside include a quick access wipes window, bottle pockets accessible from inside or outside the bag, and an optional three-point harness that helps hold the bag against the body when Dad and baby are up to things that might make Mom worry.
w dadgear.com
Here’s a nursery decor idea Dads will love... 86 the expensive change table that will only get a few years of use, and slide in a tool box or utility cart that can handle the messy stuff. Shallow drawers are perfect for stacks of diapers, wipes and bottles of vitamins and medicines, and deeper ones for onesies and sleepers. Plus, some models are easy to customize with baskets. Collect stickers from travel and trips to different stores and slap them on so that by the time your child can use the cart to store special stuff, you can retrace your family adventures together. Prices range from thousands of dollars for top-of-theline Snap-On tool box, to about $150 at your local hardware or auto parts store.
w Picture from ohdeedoh.com LIKEY
Smelly cat, smelly cat, what are they feeding you? Well as the song goes, it’s not your fault… but the least your humans could do is keep your litterbox clean. (After all, we know you would if it weren’t for the lack of opposable thumbs and all that…) Maybe this will help them — Omega Paw’s Roll’n Clean Litter Box. It’s easy and dare we say even fun to use — roll the box and litter is sifted through a screen while the doody stays behind. Pop the catch tray out for a quick empty and clean, and you’re back in business. Small size $27.95USD at Amazon.com $68.99 at Amazon.ca Large size $49.99 available at Costco
w omegapaw.com
Any good dog trainer will tell you that it’s just as important to challenge Fido’s mind as it is to exercise his body, and that letting him work for his food is a great way to harness a pooch’s mental energy. That’s why we love Nina Ottosson Games for dogs, like The Dog Brick, $46.95. Hide your furry friend’s treats in the holes beneath the puzzle, and let pooch slide the squares around to find his reward. Next stop, theoretical math equations. in an impressive collection w Found of puzzles and games at pawlickers.com
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CARE: GREEN
A Designer’s If clothes make the man, what can we say about a woman who makes all of her own clothes?
Clothing
On
September 1, 2009, Vancouver artist and clothing designer Natalie Purschwitz began a yearlong project to only wear clothes she made herself. makeshift project explores the relationship between ‘making’, ‘clothing’ and ‘living’. More than an exercise in sustainability, makeshift examines our everyday relationship with clothes. “The project came from a desire to learn by imposing limits on my daily life,” says Purschwitz. “Not only did I want to see if it would be possible, I wanted to see how it would change the way I lived my life and made and designed clothing.” Now almost two-thirds of the way complete, Purschwitz has indeed sewn all of her own clothing — from socks and underwear to coats and hats, and everything in between. She documents the experience on her blog, diligently featuring snapshots of every outfit. Purschwitz began her project by making a pair of shoes and a “uniform” resembling a jumpsuit that would serve as a safety net during the year. She has since designed, sewn, and worn her own dresses, shorts, t-shirts, underwear, cardigans and pants made of everything from jogging fleece to thick cotton twill. She also felts and crochets accessories, such as mitts and scarves, and has fashioned purses and belts. Now with enough basic pieces, Purschwitz is mixing and matching, using layering and asymmetry to create
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w WRITTEN BY DAWN MORI
stylish outfits that are artistic, unique, and suitable for streetwear. She has survived Vancouver’s damp climate with the “ultimate combination” of layering cotton and wool, which stays warm even when wet. Layering also gives her a way of accessorizing as well as a means of freshening new outfits. Her shoes are her most remarkable creation. She has cobbled several pairs, including flats, boots and sandals, which she used on a trip to Mexico. To create her distinctive clog boots, Purschwitz carved wooden soles from a two-by-four, then stapled rubber to the bottoms. The boot covers are made from vinyl, which is stapled to the wooden soles. Purschwitz’s economical use of fabric is also impressive. One posting featured all the clothing she was able to sew from one metre of fabric — a pair of leggings, two pairs of short socks, one pair of long socks, and one pair of underwear. As her project progressed, her design style simplified, and she has found ways to sew clothing quickly and easily. Complete outfits are regularly on view in her Gastown showroom including basic items such as socks and sunglasses so visitors can see how the pieces were created. Her interests in clothing and people have followed her throughout her life. Originally from Radium Hot Springs, a small town in British Columbia, Purschwitz
“The project came from a desire to learn by imposing limits on my daily life,” says Purschwitz.
Award for retail space design in 2007. (Hunt & Gather now exists only as a clothing line.) “I am interested in how people live in the world and how that changes over time,” she says. “There has always been a lot of crossover between these two disciplines for me. I’m not good at putting my finger on it so I’ll just say that makeshift is almost an anthropological study as much as it is an art project.” makeshift has dedicated readers in Canada, the U.S. and France, and has logged visitors from 107 different countries. Her followers include crafters and textile artists, designers and visual artists, as well as environmentalists, trend forecasters, and those who just love fashion. “[The project] is definitely more challenging than I ever could have imagined. Before I started the project a curator friend of mine said that he thought it sounded too easy because he already knew that I could make clothes,” Purschwitz said. “I tried to think about the range of things we need day to day, and the quantity, but it was impossible to get a sense for it in advance.” grew up with a mother who sewed and remembers making clothes for her stuffed bear. “They were very rudimentary, but the funny thing is that I still kind of use the same patterns.” She holds a BFA in Intermedia from Emily Carr University of Art + Design, and a BA in Archaeology from the University of Calgary. At first, these two areas of study may seem disparate, but knowing what she has since accomplished with them, their union makes complete sense. A member of artist collective Intermission for six years, Purschwitz’s creations ranged from films and art installations to fashion shows. Her project after that, a shop/studio/art venue called Hunt & Gather (“more archaeology crossover,” she observes) was recognized by Travel & Leisure with a “Best in the World” Design
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Her generosity in letting online visitors share her daily successes and challenges is what keeps makeshift interesting and impactful. Following an artist through a creative and learning process in which she clothes herself each day, something we all do, makes us realize the everyday act of dressing is one we may take for granted. “The most surprising thing to me is how much I’ve reduced my designs to the basics rather than getting more experimental. It’s really hard to just keep up. I think that most of the learning will happen after the project is done. It’s hard to gain any perspective on it while I’m doing it. It’s enough just to keep making the clothes. I’m not in a hurry to find meaning.”
Visit makeshift: makeshiftproject.blogspot.com
BE DELISH! DELISH DYVA
Ask the Instigator w WRITTEN BY DYANA VALENTINE
“If we cut the timing in half, I won’t be able to deliver the level of quality I pride myself on." Your question inspires me to ask what your contract or agreement says. If you have an agreed-upon timeframe and you can actually accomplish what they want, add a rush fee. Throw them a bone — what can you do for them? “I can’t do 35 days, but I can do [x, y or z].” (If you don’t have a contract, I hope this situation encourages you to re-think that crucial bit of business.)
SAY YES-TO-THE-NO!
Dear DyVa: I’m working with a client on a 75day project and they are now in a pickle and need it in 35 days. How do I learn the fine art of saying NO? Do I have to offer a compromise? Are there any good tricks to avoid sounding like a jerk? I have it down, to a point, but other days I feel like I’m missing something. My friend and superstar coach, Amy Ahlers, says, “No is a complete sentence.” You don’t have to provide a reason. Saying no without a big ramble or some complex plan to protect your reputation takes a little bit of practice. (A very pointy-headed bookkeeper once told me she tells her clients that their crisis is not her emergency. Try it out sometime.) As you build your NO muscle, consider the concept of under-promising and over-delivering. I trust that you have integrity and like to follow through on your commitments, right? Consider this on-your-way-to-NO script:
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I strongly believe that the relationship is more important than the contract. Their request is not the end of the conversation. Put on your investigative reporter hat and find out what they really need. Is something else behind the new deadline that would be helpful for you to know? Investigate. Ask whether it has something to do with a changed approvals process, someone’s vacation or a new product launch date. Do a little bit of digging — it will clarify what is truly needed, and when, AND it will help you build rapport with your client. More often than not, I find this really helps me get to know my clients to serve them better. I also find that with a bit of prodding, the new crisis-deadline is more flexible than it seemed when first presented. Stand your ground. Remember, no means no. Please report back and let me know how you handle this (and other) no-gotiations. RELUCTANT RECOMMENDATION
Dear DyVa: I’ve been asked to write a recommendation for a former coworker. As a freelancer, I know better than anyone that LinkedIn recommendations are important, but in this case the best I can say is that she never screwed anything up because she ignored things until they became someone else’s problem. I tried ignoring the request, but so far, in the last three days, it’s come with three per-
sonal email reminders and two voicemails, each offering suggested wording about her “strengths”. I can’t hide. Do I tell her that I don’t feel comfortable writing a recommendation for her, or do I write something vague and noncommittal? I hate to say no because you just never know when she might be in a position to give the go/no-go call on a project that I might be interested in. I don’t like burning bridges. You are describing a bully, both in your former colleague’s work style and in her current interaction with you. It is absurd of her to bully you into writing a testimonial. Forget about this bridge — it sounds singed already. Would you really want to be involved in business with her again? Plus, it could tarnish your credibility to recommend someone who is a lame ass. Pull off the bully bandaid.
p i sk e h t e t t a l
If you choose to don a brave NO cape, here’s a practice script:
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“Dear (Bully): I am not available to give you a recommendation.” You do not have to offer an explanation, excuse or polite way out. Period.
$
If you find yourself in some circumstance where you absolutely HAVE to write a recommendation, consider being descriptive, but not judgmental — and definitely don’t lie. Be honest about what you can describe: cheerful, creative and aligned with the corporate mission, for instance. If you’re still on the fence, write a neutral version, a polite version, and a bitchy version. This three-step process will help you get clear on what is true. I bet you’ll find a way to say no graciously or write something that is truthful. How we do one thing is often how we do everything. This goes for her and for you. Are you experiencing bullying in other parts of your life?
I believe in you! Dyana Valentine (AKA the Delish DyVa) is a professional instigator. She asks (and answers) the tough questions that help you move through your personal and
on the
seventh help a family in need for just $7 a month... for the love of liz. the
logelin lizlogelin foundation
www.thelizlogelinfoundation.org
professional life with aplomb. Find more instigational goodness at dyanavalentine.com, and follow Dyana on Twitter (@DyanaValentine)!
spring/summer 2010
delishmag.com
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