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YouGo with Rajni Let’s Be Mindful Series Part 24 : Mindfully carving the new normal and keeping good mental health

By: Rajni Ghai Malhotra

October is the mental health month and what better time than now to reflect on our mental wellbeing during the most havoc-wreaking phase we have been living through since the start of the year and let’s face it - things are still out of control. The pandemic has brought to light, rather brusquely, the insignificance and absolute helplessness of mankind as a whole.

We are in a permanent state of hyper vigilance, carrying a sense of dread about what will happen next, seeking answers where none are coming. The uncertainty is enough to affect our mental health. And we have all been impacted by it, whether we realise it or not.

Man’s sense of security is derived from knowing the answers, now, all too suddenly, we are standing on the edge of a cliff looking down an abyss waiting for answers that do not seem coming. The not knowing has never been as unnerving and distressing as it is now. When will things return to normal? Will things ever be the same? When will we see our loved ones who live in other parts of the world. Will there be a cure soon?

The mindful fix:

Make peace with ‘not knowing’: We must accept that we do not have all the answers and probably will not for some time to come. Once we acknowledge that, it will become easier to guide ourselves to work with the ‘knowns’.

Make a conscious effort to stop asking questions that you do not have the answers to. Instead, train yourself to look at questions that you can answer. Try making the questions more specific and reflective:

Am I healthy? Are my loved ones safe? Am I doing my best to keep myself and my family safe in these times? What can I do to make a new normal that best suits my personal and family circumstances. Definite answers bring comfort, clarity and a sense of direction, leading us away from the chaos and towards a more peaceful state of mind.

Build a routine to suit the new normal: We are creatures of habit. Our lives, until recently, were neatly tied into a broad routine, let us for example take a typical family unit – wake up, eat breakfast, drop kids off at school, drive to work, drive back home, eat dinner, sleep. Now all too suddenly, there is limited or not much driving to work. Weekend plans do not involve

face to face meetings with friends. In some parts of the world, students are still schooling from home. It is time to design a new routine – one that fits in with your situation, a time to wake up, a time for meals, a log in and log off time, time to meet and connect with friends in a socially distant manner. The new normal calls for a new need to learn to draw boundaries and chalk a routine that will allow you to regain some kind of control over your day and time, ultimately helping in bringing back the feeling of security that you are in control of some aspects of your life. (For more tips, refer to article Part 23: Essentials of mindfulness during the pandemic, July edition)

Practice Mindfulness and meditation: When we talk about a new routine in the new normal – let us not forget to also add a time to connect with ourselves into that routine. Deep conscious breaths as many times a day is the surest way to calm the nerves and regain balance especially in this time of uncertainty. Every action that you perform, make an effort to be present and in the moment.

Every single day or as regularly as you can, make time to meditate. Meditation is not about sitting with no thoughts. It is about spending time alone and quietly by yourself, with yourself, meeting and acknowledging your thoughts and making an effort to accept things the way they are. A few minutes spent with yourself without judgement or urgency are few precious minutes you invest towards keeping yourself mentally and emotionally fit. Make use of creative hobbies, music, singing, walks in nature, anything that will help you to spend a few peaceful minutes being comfortable with yourself alone.

Mindfulness Exercise for you to try. This is a powerful exercise to check in with yourself. It may be done at any time or place, preferably when you are alone. Here are my answers as a guide for you to try. Refer to featured picture where I spent a few mindful solitary moments standing in the tree pose at a beach.

Just watch this moment without trying to change it at all.

What is happening - In this moment, as I stand facing the ocean, there is a slight drizzle landing gently on every surface. The sun, hidden behind a dark grey cloud is resting. The ocean, vast and grey, reflects the grey sky. It is not entirely calm, neither is it restless. Easy waves come and go.

What do I feel - As I look upon this vision I begin feel insignificant in contrast to the expanse of the blue grey sea-scape. I feel my breath becoming deeper and fuller. My troubles and my worries feel even smaller. I feel alone yet happy in that space.

What do I see -I see waves rising and falling. I see clouds floating past. I see drops of drizzle falling gently around me. I see shades of grey, blue, brown and green. I see a bird in the distance spanning its winnings and gliding effortlessly over the sea.

What do I hear - I hear the waves. I hear myself thinking and after a while I hear nothing.

I only feel. I feel peace and calm.

There YouGo! Some mindfulness tips to check in with yourself and maintain your mental wellbeing as you navigate the ‘unkowns’ and the uncertainty this year has brought upon us.

Yours mindfully, Rajni Follow Rajni on Facebook @YogaWithRajni

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Yoga&Mindfulnessworkshopsforadultsandkids

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