Desi Today English - April 2014

Vol. 5 | Issue 2 | Apr-May 2014

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NDP is best positioned to defeat Harper in B.C.: Tom Mulcair

Increasing violence on public transportation Click Lounge is Back YouTube Stardom for Indians Canadian Medical Graduates Who Study Abroad Face Prejudice And Barriers

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Features 08 Simmrin Dhaliwal on a path to her soccer dream 12 NDP is best positioned to defeat Harper Conservatives in Canada, but particularly in B.C.: Tom Mulcair 16 Harper’s “Sickening” Speech in Israel 18 BJP’s Shehzadas list runs long 20 Increasing violence on public transportation 22 A Guide to Gang Prevention - Part II 28 The Reunion by Gary Thandi 30 Click Lounge is Back 32 Canadian Medical Graduates Who Study Abroad Face Prejudice And Barriers When They Try To Return Home 36 The ‘donkey route’ to Britain: Hair-raising tales of illegal immigration 40 YouTube Stardom for Indians

On a path to her soccer dream

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Editor’s Note Happy Easter and Vaisakhi. From all the staff and contributors at Desi Today, we hope you’ve had an amazing start to 2014.

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Our cover story is a truly inspirational young woman who has achieved so much academically and a profound amount athletically, for her tender 16 years. Simmrin Dhaliwal was a pleasure to interview and gave me great hope for the future of the Indo-Canadian community in BC. It wouldn’t surprise me if you haven’t heard of this young soccer star as she hasn’t received much coverage by South Asian media. At Desi Today we are committed to keeping our content fresh, local and rivetting, and Simmrin’s accomplishments certainly fall in those categories.

We’ve got some great stories for you this issue, including my personal favorite, a short story by Dr. Suresh Kurl, called Amavasya.

We will be publishing his short story in three parts, with the first part being published in this issue. Believe me when I tell you that you’ll want to read the second part immediately. I started reading at 1 am and couldn’t get to bed because Dr. Kurl’s story touched me so profusely.

We also have another wonderful short story from Gary Thandi called The Reunion. It is a hauntingly beautiful tale on the reunion of a couple separated prematurely.

We also have our favorite lawyer from the Island, Rajinder Sahota, voicing in on our beloved Prime Minister and his stance on Israel. Rajinder’s passion regarding human rights issues is a breath of fresh air.

I have some exciting news to share with our readers. As of April, you will be able to tune in and watch me and my fellow co-hosts Rina Gill and Mandeep Patrola on television or online as we are reviving Rina Gill’s talk show Click Lounge. More details on the topics and format can be found inside.

I hope you enjoy this issue as much as we’ve enjoyed putting it together for you. A lot of work goes into putting this amazing magazine together so I’d like to thank our writers, photographers, designer and wonderful sales and managerial team.

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DESI TODAY EXCLUSIVE

COVER

“I’m a really competitive person so if someone says they’re better than me, I will do whatever it takes to be the best.”

On a path to her soccer dream

Simmrin Dhaliwal 8

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Before Simmrin Dhaliwal was 16, she had the numbers of Ivy League and NCAA Division 1 college soccer coaches programmed into her phone. Simmrin was all of 16 but was already weighing offers to attend Princeton, Northwestern and various other universities.

She has now committed to attending Northwestern University in Chicago, free of charge.

Simmrin is a young soccer star who got her start playing in the Whitecaps prospects league when she was 11 and again when she was 12. From that point on, she made the BC Provincial team playing one year up.

With the provincial team, Simmrin won silver and bronze at past national championship tournaments and then got an invite to the Whitecaps FC Girls Elite program. With that program, they won gold at the Canada summer games and gold at the Gothia Cup in Sweden. Being one of the three girls from BC to make the U17 Canadian Women’s national team and the only East Indian on the team, Simmrin and her team went on to qualify for the World Cup, finishing second at the CONCACAF qualifying tournament in Jamaica and at the FiFA World Cup in Costa Rica, advanced out of their group, eliminating top teams Germany and Korea. The Canadian team lost in the quarterfinals but played amazing soccer and created buzz in Canada for the way they played. Simmrin was a part of making history at the tournament, when the team scored more than one goal in a single World Cup game.

You just got back from a trip to Costa Rica, can you tell me a little more about it?

I was in Costa Rica for a month for the FIFA U-17 Women’s World Cup representing Canada. It was a great experience and we made it farther than we thought we would. I met so many incredible people and felt so encouraged by the support in the stadium. My parents weren’t able to join me on this trip but I talked to them daily and there were very supportive and encouraging.

Where else have you had the chance to travel, and does the travelling affect your school work?

I have travelled all across the US to different states, playing in provinces such as Quebec, Ontario, New Brunswick, Nova Scotia and PEI, I played in Sweden, Jamaica, and Costa Rica. I do very well in school considering the amount I miss. I have never finished with less than a B, I have always finished with an A or B. It is definitely hard missing so much school and it makes it hard to catch up. But I have done it so many time that I’ve learned how to prepare myself for upcoming absences. It has made me have to work that much harder but helped make me a more independent and www.desitoday.ca

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self motivated person.

Canada isn’t well known for soccer as we tend to focus on other sports. What made you start playing soccer?

My mom put me into a lot of sports like swimming and gymnastics, but being the first child my mom was always afraid of me getting sick playing outside. My older cousin played soccer and my aunt told my mom to get me into soccer because I had so much energy as a kid. It was more of a time-passing hobby, and who would have known that I would be sitting here today, and that’s how I got started.

My dad would always be watching basketball and didn’t know much about soccer, but once I started playing and wasn’t very good at it, he couldn’t stand me not being the best and being upset at my performance, so he’d take me out to the field and practice. He helped me get better, and I wanted to learn, so I went to private training and got better. I went from playing net to playing attackingmid with the Whitecaps team but when I go to the National team I’m a full-back.

I have been in love with the game every since I started. There are times when it gets tough and I question why I play the game, but the excitement and amazing experiences that I have while playing soccer, makes me love it more. Soccer has made me a better, more well-rounded person.

ously people want to win but for me, Whitecaps and the National team are so stressful so going to Indian tournaments is fun and I’m able to enjoy myself playing.

end of the month. I’m a little nervous but I think because of all the experiences I’ve had travelling, I’ll be prepared for the move to Northwestern.

What’s your worst experience with soccer training?

Are your parents nervous about you moving?

How old were you when you started playing, and how good of a player were you?

What made you choose Northwestern?

I started playing when I was 7-8 and I was pretty terrible. Everyone would be running after the ball and I would be trailing behind them. I started playing soccer as more of a hobby, my parents thought I’d have something to do so I wouldn’t be sitting on the couch at home. The first year I was horrible, after that year when my dad started working with me, the second year I was a step higher than everyone else because he had invested so much time in me.

Do you play in Indian tournaments?

All the time! I love playing in Indian tournaments, it’s more casual and less-stress. Obvi-

I hate fitness. Especially the beep test or yoyo test. I’d always be in the middle or bottom, so I hate doing fitness tests. I knew I needed to improve so for the last six months I’ve been concentrating on my fitness so I could be ready for nationals. The position I play with the national is literally up and down the field, like the beep test, so the practicing paid off.

There were so many offers from other schools and we went to visit schools that were highly ranked academically, like Princeton, the University of Pennsylvania, and the cities were great but I wanted a balance in school and the athletic side. Northwestern being in the Big 10, you always get that competitiveness and the actual city of Chicago is beautiful and the atmosphere is nice. If I’m going to school for four years I want it to be somewhere I can have fun, and not be in the middle of nowhere.

I’ve been travelling so much but I’ve never stayed somewhere for four months and then come home. I went to Costa Rica for one month and was getting homesick near the

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My parents are way more nervous than me.

They were trying to get me to stay home and go to UBC, but I knew what I wanted and that’s the opportunity to go to the states and play NCAA Division 1 soccer. My parents worry if I made the right choice because Chicago has the reputation of being dangerous, but I’m right outside Chicago, and I’m going there for school and soccer, not to look for trouble. There’s a lot of support in the US, especially for student-athletes. They love that there and going to Northwestern is going to open so many windows of opportunity for me. I haven’t decided specifically yet but I know I want to go into something within the medical field. The sciences hopefully and then med-school.

This last summer was huge. I travelled to Sherbrooke, Quebec and went on to play in the Canada Summer games, and we won a gold medal for BC. It was like a mini-Olympics and it was such an amazing experience.

We played against Quebec in the finals in a packed stadium, and won gold. Last year’s Whitecaps team was history making; we won our league and every championship game we were in.

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FEATURES

DESI TODAY EXCLUSIVE

P O LI TI C S

NDP is best positioned to defeat Harper Conservatives in Canada, but particularly in B.C.: Tom Mulcair

BY RATTAN MALL

TOM MULCAIR, Leader of the New Democratic Party and the Official Opposition, did not shy away from some very blunt questions I put to him on a wide range of questions.

He exuded the kind of calm confidence that you see him demonstrate day in and day out in the House of Commons even as he so deftly tears a strip off Prime Minister Stephen Harper time and time again, clearly unnerving him at times.

He told me: “In all of Canada, but par12

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ticularly in BC, the NDP is the party best positioned to defeat Stephen Harper and the Conservatives in 2015. We have the experience, the ideas and the commitment to unite progressives.”

He said: “I am proud of the long and proud history between the NDP and Canada’s South Asian community and we will continue to stand side-by-side as partners to make our country a fairer, more prosperous and equitable place.”

Mulcair flayed both the Liberals and the

Conservatives for their incompetent handling of Canada’s immigration.

He declared: “When the NDP forms government in 2015, we will treat all Canadians with the respect that they deserve.

We will offer an apology in the House of Commons for tragedy of the Komagata Maru, support the entrepreneurial spirit of our diverse communities and prioritize family reunification.”

Here’s the full interview: www.desitoday.ca

MALL: What do you think is the reason for federal Liberal Leader Justin Trudeau’s popularity in spite of all the negative and distorted propaganda by the Conservatives against him? Where, in your opinion, is Trudeau lacking?

countries in the world. New Democrats know that new Canadians make our country stronger.

The Liberals left Canada’s immigration system with nearly a million backlogged applications; no progress on foreign credential recognition; and five-year waits to sponsor aging parents. The Conservatives haven’t been any better. For six years they cut family class quotas, worsening the Liberals’ backlog; and slashed immigrant settlement funding and refugee resettlement rates. Their ill-advised cap of 5,000 family reunification applications for 2014 was filled within the first 33 days of this year.

Worse yet, Conservative and Liberal failures to overhaul the visitor visa system denies applications with no clear explanation.

NDP do if they were to form the next government?

MALL: How will the NDP’s immigration policy differ from that of (1) the Conservatives and (2) the Liberals?

Canada needs an efficient, transparent and accountable immigration system.

New Democrats would immediately address family reunification and foreign credential recognition as top priorities. We would study ways for potential immigrants to be assessed and accredited prior to their arrival to Canada.

To address inconsistencies in the visitor visa application system we would allow for appeals of rejected applications and include basic explanations of why applications were unsuccessful. As well, we would ensure that refugees be treated fairly with access to a fair and fast appeals system and improved settlement services.

MULCAIR: Canada is a nation that was built by immigrants. We take pride in our reputation as one of the most welcoming

MALL: The Conservative government has been steadily downloading health care costs to the provinces. What would the

Canadians can get the public health care they need wherever they live; and that cost is never a barrier to getting a prescription filled or making sure a loved one is taken care of. Our vision of a modern, well-funded public health care system puts Canadians first in communities across the country and includes: • better home care, long term care, and palliative care; • expanded public coverage for prescription drugs; • recognizing the importance of mental health; • and improving health care services for Aboriginal peoples and others in federal jurisdiction.

Ensuring that all Canadians have access to quality health care will remain a top priority for an NDP government.

MULCAIR: Like so many Canadians. I come from a working-class family and am proud of my roots. I come from a large family and I have been working since I was 16 years old. I understand from my own experience the struggles Canadians face in trying to make ends meet.

In contrast, Mr. Trudeau has still failed to present a clear plan, or even clear policy proposals, despite the 2015 elections being just around the corner. Mr. Trudeau has yet to present a clear plan to Canadians on the important issues this country is facing.

Canadians I talk with are worried about things like retirement security; taking care of their families; and reuniting with their loved ones -- and it’s up to us to hold the government to account for its failures, while also making practical proposals to address these pressing challenges.

We will all have to wait to see what ideas, if any, Mr. Trudeau has on how to move Canada forward on these important issues.

MULCAIR: New Democrats believe the federal government has a responsibility to provide reliable funding for health care to all provinces and territories so that they can provide high-quality care to Canadians.

However, thanks to Conservative mismanagement of health care and outright refusal to negotiate with the provinces and territories on the health accord Canadians are facing even longer wait times; unequal standards of care from province to province; higher drug costs; and limited access to home and long-term care.

New Democrats want to make sure that

MALL: How does the fact that the federal Liberal Party has been consistently leading in the polls since Trudeau’s election as its leader affect you as Leader of the Official Opposition?

MULCAIR: Polls go up and down, my approach is to stay focused on our job as the Official Opposition -- hold the government to account and show we have the experience and practical ideas to replace them in 2015.

As for the Liberal Party of today, it is clearly the same old party – one that for 13 years failed to deliver for Canadians, a government plagued by scandal that offered lots of help for the well-connected friends, but virtually nothing for Canadians.

For too long, Canadians have been told that there were only two parties to vote for -- but Liberal and Conservative policies have only led to an increase in inequality.

New Democrats know that Canadians deserve better. And they have a better choice—they can vote for the change they want and with the NDP, they will get it.

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MALL: How different will your environmental policy be as compared with the Conservatives?

MULCAIR: As a former provincial Environment Minister, I fought to protect the environment – from writing North America’s first sustainable development law to enshrining the right to live in a clean environment. Today, I am proud to lead a party that is fully committed to these same goals.

The Conservatives have watered down environmental legislation and given subsidies to their friends in the oil industry. Under the Conservatives, Canada has been repeatedly ridiculed internationally for a failure to make meaningful contributions to stop climate change. Unsurprisingly they chose an Environment Minister who actually denies that climate change is taking place.

Canadians deserve better. New Democrats have consistently proposed ideas to protect the environment and develop a green economy. In government we would continue to advance policies to achieve a fairer, greener and more prosperous Canada. Our vision is based on three key principles: 1. Sustainability: to ensure that polluters pay for the pollution they create.

2. Partnership: all Canadians should benefit from resource development and we must create value-added jobs here in Canada.

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3. Long-term prosperity: investing in modern, clean energy technology to keep Canada on the cutting edge of energy development and ensure longterm affordable energy.

Our natural resources are a tremendous blessing but they have to be developed in a sustainable way. The future of our planet is at stake but there’s still time to build a brighter, greener future.

MALL: How would you deal with Quebec separatists?

MULCAIR: In 2011, something unique happened in Quebec. For the first time in a generation, a federalist party won the majority of seats in Quebec.

Voters embraced the NDP’s approach of building bridges and working together to build a better canada, instead not dividing people with the same old debates, like The Liberals and Bloc Quebecois want to do.

I believe Canada is stronger with Quebec. It is our diversity that makes us stronger, that’s the beauty of having a federation.

The NDP believes in Canada. We understand that the vast majority of Quebecers want to remain in Canada. Our goal is to fight for a Canada that includes Quebec.

Together, we will build a fairer, more inclusive country that respects all of its citizens.

MALL: In B.C., South Asians have tradition-

ally supported the NDP at the provincial level but the Liberals at the federal level.

The so-called Orange Wave under a charismatic Jack Layton in the last election, led to the defeat of Liberal candidates. But with Trudeau’s charisma, South Asians appear to be moving back to the Liberals at the federal level. How do you intend to counter this?

MULCAIR: In all of Canada, but particularly in BC, the NDP is the party best positioned to defeat Stephen Harper and the Conservatives in 2015. We have the experience, the ideas and the commitment to unite progressives. The NDP is a different kind of party -- we’ll always put people first and when we make promises, we keep them.

New Democrats will never act like the old-line Conservative and Liberal parties.

We won’t take anyone’s support for granted.

I am proud of the long and proud history between the NDP and Canada’s South Asian community and we will continue to stand side-by-side as partners to make our country a fairer, more prosperous and equitable place.

MALL: How would you deal with relations between (1) Canada and India, and (2) Canada and Sri Lanka?

MULCAIR: New Democrats believe in taking a balanced and principled approach. I believe that a Canada-India trade agreewww.desitoday.ca

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MULCAIR: I want to extend my best wishes for a Happy Vaisakhi to all celebrating.

For many, Vaisakhi is celebration of the new harvest and a time for renewal, but it also a time when Sikhs celebrate the inauguration of the Khalsa in 1699. Both are symbolic of our shared values of equality and justice.

The Punjabi and Sikh community have a proud history in Canada, including a brave service in the Canadian Armed Forces and the many economic and social contributions that have been made to our nation.

I believe that the unique heritage, arts and culture of Punjabi’s in Canada is worth celebrating in our collective history has Canadians.

For example, this year, we mark the 100 year anniversary of the Komagata Maru, yet we await an official apology from the Government of Canada.

When the NDP forms government in 2015, we will treat all Canadians with the respect that they deserve. We will offer an apology in the House of Commons for tragedy of the Komagata Maru, support the entrepreneurial spirit of our diverse communities and prioritize family reunification.

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MALL: Any message for South Asians?

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ment could offer important opportunities for both countries to advance their interests.

Canada’s vibrant Indo-Canadian community provides Canada and India with a strong connection, but currently the trade relationship between our two countries is not reaching its potential.

For example, the Conservative Government plans to introduce a tariff tax on thousands of items from India including a 6% increase on Saris and 3% on ground and crushed Spices. This will adversely impact many Indo-Canadian small businesses and families. With the introduction of this tax, we could see prices go up in restaurants, textiles and clothing shops, grocery stores and more, making everyday life more unaffordable.

With regards to Sri Lanka, the NDP remains concerned about human rights.

I am especially concerned by the recent findings from Dr. Navi Pillay, the UN High Commissioner for Human Rights, about a recent surge in violence, harassment, and intimidation against women and girls, religious minorities, human rights defenders, lawyers, and journalists.

I believe that an independent investigation of war crimes allegations is a crucial step towards reconciliation.

That is why Canada must take a principled stance regarding the Sri Lankan government’s continued human rights abuses.

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FEATURES

POLITIC S

HARPER’S

“SICKENING”

SPEECH IN ISRAEL

Canadian PM Stephen Harper proudly pontificated before the Israeli Knesset about the shared values between Canada and Israel, “the most natural of allies”. He boasted of the pride he felt for what Israel had “accomplished here”, of Israel’s “courage in war... generosity in peace, and of the bloom that the desert has yielded” of course “under [Israeli] stewardship”. Ignoring for the moment, the racist presupposition of Harper’s comments, let us address the shared values.

Of course Harper is right to comment on the shared values between the two States. After all, both are responsible for Crimes Against Humanity and Ethnic Cleansing. Official Canadian policy is to: (a) continue to ignore our State-led ethnic cleansing efforts of First Nations, Aboriginal and Metis Peoples, and (b) refuse to account for such atrocities, the consequences of which affect daily living to this very day. Israeli policy, according to the terrorist-funded human rights organizations Amnesty International, Human Rights Watch and Israel’s own B’Tselem, is to systematically cleanse Palestinians located West of the Jordan River. Evidence of both is overwhelming and our collective refusal to hold both States to account is a reflection of our own principles.

Without sifting through the voluminously abysmal human rights record of Israel, let us cut to the judgment of perhaps the most respected international body in the World. Ten years ago, the World Court, based in the Hague, delivered its judgment on the so-called “final-status issues”. There are four, but a fifth should be added: 1) borders, 2) settlements, 3) Jerusalem, 4) refugees and the right of return, and 5) water.

Borders

Israel’s position on Gaza and the West Bank is that they are “disputed territories” and as a result, require diplomatic negotiation, 16

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which of course the Palestinians a.k.a. “terrorists” are not prepared to engage in. According to the World Court however, these are not “dispute territories”. A fundamental bed-rock principle of international law (a peremptory norm) is that it is inadmissible to acquire territory by war. The World Court went on to state that Israel acquired territory on which to build settlements and advance its border in the June 1967 War, and as a result, the acquisition of such territory is illegal; it is “Occupied Palestinian Territory”. This is the unanimous decision of a very conservative World Court - these are not “disputed territories” these are “Occupied Palestinian Territories” and Israel has no legal claim to them.

Settlements

Pursuant to Article 49 of the Fourth Geneva Convention, it is illegal for an occupying power to transfer its population to occupied territory. According to the World Court, the West Bank and Gaza are occupied territory under international law and

as a result, every single settlement is illegal under international law. That includes every new settlement going up each time a US Secretary of State leaves Israel following a diplomatic media blitz. The World Court cited the UN Security Council, which called the settlements a “flagrant violation” of international law. The World Court was unequivocal.

Jerusalem

Israel’s position is that East Jerusalem is that it is a part of its “eternal and undivided capital” and that “under no circumstances will we give up any of East Jerusalem”. The World Court is clear on this issue as well No. East Jerusalem was acquired by Israel during the 1967 War, and it is inadmissible to acquire territory by war. As a result, East Jerusalem is “Occupied Palestinian Territory”.

Harper referred to Israel as the “only country in the Middle East” that respects the “rule of law”. Not according to the World Court. These so called complex “fi-

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nal-status issues” are not complex, they are not open to debate, they are not disputed.

To illustrate how uncontroversial these issues are, most World Court decisions are close. In its decision on whether nuclear weapons are illegal under international humanitarian law (because by definition they do not discriminate between civilians and combatants) there was a close vote: 8 to 7.

On these “final status issues”, the World Court was unequivocal: the vote was 14 to 1. The judge from the UK, Rosalyn Higgins is Jewish by birth and pro-Israel, but on these issues she sided with the majority; because these issues are not controversial, they are fundamental principles of international law. One cannot acquire territory through war. One cannot transfer their population to occupied territories.

The one dissenting judge called his statement a “declaration” not a “dissent”.

Thomas Buergenthal from the US opened his declaration by stating “there’s much in the majority opinion with which I agree” and on the basic, most elementary question of the conflict, the settlements, he states the he agrees with the majority: under Article 49, the settlements are illegal under international law. As a result, on the three biggest of these “final status issues” there is zero controversy, the vote of the highest judicial body in the World is unanimous. There is not sufficient time or space to explore the final two issues, suffice it to say that the World Court was unequivocal on these issues as well.

So what is the “moral imperative” that we support the “Jewish State” as Harper put it. The World Court is unequivocal in its position on the two-state settlement.

The World Court is unequivocal about the “Occupied Palestinian Territories” which Israel illegally occupies, including East Jerusalem. The World Court is unequivocal about the illegal nature of the settlements.

Harper repeatedly referred to the United Nations. Of note is the disgraceful way in which Canada, under Harper’s leadership, has thrown its hat in with Israel, the US, and a couple of Pacific Island Nations in the yearly vote on settling the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. For over 30 years humanity has voted on this and for 30 years the vote has been about the same, the entire World on one side with Israel, the US and a few Pacific Island Nations on the other side. And now Canada, under the guidance of Harper, has decided to throw its vote in to support Israel and its illegal territorial acquisitions.

As Harper so eloquently puts it, “it is nothing short of sickening”.

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P O LI TI C S

BJP’s

Shehzadas

list runs long

Even as it attacks the Congress for its “dynastic politics”, the BJP appears to be charting a similar course going by the number of sons and daughters of its leaders in the fray for the forthcoming Lok Sabha elections. BJP prime ministerial candidate Narendra Modi has often derided Congress vice president Rahul Gandhi as “shehzada (prince)” in his election rallies and refers to the Congress as a “sultanate (kingdom).”

But when it came to ticket allotments, the saffron party behaved no differently and nominations for princelings abound.

The sons of two sitting and three former chief ministers of the Bharatiya Janata

Anurag Thakur

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Poonam Mahajan

Party (BJP) are in the fray in the Lok Sabha polls despite the party’s stated opposition to “dynastic politics”.

Anurag Thakur, son of former Himachal Pradesh chief minister Prem Kumar Dhumal, is re-contesting from Hamirpur in Himachal Pradesh, while Varun Gandhi, MP and son of party leader Maneka Gandhi, has shifted to Sultanpur from Pilibhit in Uttar Pradesh. Sultanpur is adjacent to Congress vice president and Varun’s cousin Rahul Gandhi’s Amethi constituency.

Poonam Mahajan, daughter of former union minister Pramod Mahajan, is the BJP candidate from Mumbai North-Central.

Former union minister and party MP

Jayant Sinha

Yashwant Sinha’s son Jayant is fighting for his father’s Hazaribagh seat in Jharkhand.

Former Uttar Pradesh chief minister Kalyan Singh’s son Rajbir Singh is contesting from Etah.

In Delhi, former chief minister Sahib Singh Verma’s son Parvesh Verma, an MLA, is the party candidate from West Delhi.

Dushyant Singh, son of Rajasthan Chief Minister Vasundhara Raje is fighting from Jhalawar in the state.

Chhattisgarh chief minister Raman Singh’s son Abhishek is the party candidate from the Rajnandgaon Lok Sabha constituency.

But the BJP insists the party cannot be

Abhishek Singh

Parvesh Verma

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compared to the Congress.

“The Congress dynasty is the dynasty of leadership. It is not about making someone an MP or an MLA. In the Congress, it starts from the top and percolates to the bottom and is dynastic in totality,” BJP leader Prakash Javadekar told IANS. “In the BJP’s case, the party leadership, be it Atalji or Advaniji or even Rajnathji, no one has monopolised decision-making.

“In the Congress, only the Nehru-Gandhi family takes decisions...that’s the Congress’ legacy; the final decision maker is dynastic,” he added.

Congress general secretary Shakeel Ahmed, however, accused the BJP of double standards and said that not just the party but also its allies were also dynastic.

“Modi regularly criticises dynastic politics. The BJP has three allies - the Badal dynasty, the Thackeray dynasty and now the Paswan dynasty,” Ahmed countered.

The Shiromani Akali Dal (SAD) headed

by Punjab Chief Minister Prakash Singh Badal, the Shiv Sena headed by Uddhav Thackeray and Bihar’s Lok Janshakti Party (LJP) headed by Ram Vilas Paswan are part of BJP-led National Democratic Alliance.

Ahmed said he was a third generation Congressman and was proud of this fact.

“I am a third generation Congress leader and I am proud of it. The BJP is not that old. How could they have third or fourth generation leaders,” Ahmed asked while speaking to IANS. Analyst Pradip Kumar Datta said that children of BJP leaders getting tickets indicated “Congressisation” of the party.

“I don’t know if dynastic politics is native to the Indian way of thinking... the ‘Parivar’ (Sangh Parivar) was supposed to be about ideological parivar (family), not one based on kinship,” said Datta, professor and former head of Delhi University’s department of political science.

“Perhaps it is the ‘Congressisation’ of the BJP. On one hand we have the family lineages and on the other we have ‘Modification’... everything is focussed around Modi, not the BJP,” he added.

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Being a bus driver is probably one of the most stressful job you’ll find. You’re battling with traffic and poor drivers on the road, and constantly dealing with members of the public, a percentage of whom are trouble. Often these troublesome passengers include teens who have had too much to drink and want to show off to their friends, and depending on what route you are on, people with serious mental-health issues with proclivities towards violence.

Aggression between passengers or against drivers is nothing new. Racial slurs, threats and brawls have been reported across Canada in recent years, and previously violence against taxi drivers caused much concern. But is a fear of violence on our public transit systems justified, and what is being done or can be done to prevent such crimes?

These questions are just a few that are posed at the aftermath as two bus drivers were involved in an unprovoked assault in the lower mainland in just one month. A www.desitoday.ca

bus driver in Surrey suffered a broken nose from a passenger who was leisurely enjoying a cigarette outside the bus when he was told that the bus was about to leave.

A female driver in Metro Vancouver was the victim of an earlier violent and unprovoked assault when three young women punched her and dragged her by her hair after being asked to get off the bus due to not paying their fare and openly drinking alcohol that police believe was stolen from a liquor store.

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Prevalence of crime on public transportation The number of assaults, including criminal acts such as death threats, physical abuse and spitting on bus drivers, has gone up over the last three years. According to the union representing about 3,400 transit operators in the lower mainland, Unifor local 111, there have been a staggering 40 attacks against Coast Mountain bus drivers in 2014.

By this time last year, there was 32 assaults on drivers and 134 total assaults for 2013, which is up from 117 assaults in 2012.

Most assaults on bus drivers including punching, pushing, spitting on or spitting in the drivers face.

In March of this year, three women were charged with a vicious, unprovoked attack on a female Coast Mountain bus driver. In February, a 23-year-old man was charged with robbery and breaching bail conditions in connection with the assault of a bus driver at the Surrey City Central bus loop.

Last summer, a man pointed a handgun at a Kelowna bus driver and threatened to kill him. He approached the driver’s window

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(Left) Tom Bregg. (Right) Video frame grab released by court - It shows Gary Edwin Mattson, 25, starting his attack against Tom Bregg

after getting off the bus and pulled the trigger three times. The pistol made a clicking sound each time, terrifying the driver.

That same summer, a 31-year-old woman stabbed a Kelowna bus driver with a syringe and a Vancouver passenger suckerpunched a driver and shattered his orbital bone because the driver asked him to pay his fare.

In 2012 a man assaulted a bus driver when he was refused a free ride; the man also assaulted a female passenger. Another passenger threatened to slash the throat of a bus driver, and yet another passenger spat at a bus driver.

hand down stiffer sentences to those convicted of committing any criminal offence against an on-duty transit worker, similar to laws that make assaulting a police officer a more serious crime.

Law enforcement responses

The resurrected bill, which died when the last election was called, is supported by the Canadian Urban Transit Association, which says addressing bus driver assaults has been one of its three top priorities since 2011 when the number of reported attacks against bus drivers across the country reached 2,061. The first bill was introduced that year following the welldocumented assault on Edmonton transit driver Tom Bregg, who was beaten into a coma by a passenger in 2009.

So, how have governments and law enforcement reacted to the increased perception of violent crime on our public transport networks?

Members of Unifor local 111 are in favour of a bill introduced in Parliament in the fall by MP Ralph Goodale that would lead to tougher penalties for those convicted. Bill C-533 calls for changes to the Criminal Code that would force judges to

Bob Paddon, executive vice-president at TransLink, told media that he agreed the federal government should enact tougher penalties for people convicted of assaulting a transit operator. TransLink was previously talking to Justice Canada about what can be done about fines and penalties. He also said if drivers are reconsidering installing barriers, TransLink and Coast Mountain will have that discussion.

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The union is also in strong favour of installing barriers for bus drivers, but only on condition that the driver can choose whether to use one. WorkSafeBC has said in the past that barriers would be mandatory for all drivers and drivers then rejected installing the barriers. Some bus drivers feel claustrophobic behind the shields, while others are working on routes where they don’t feel it is necessary to use one.

Prevention and perspective There is no doubt that acts of aggression on buses, trains or in taxis are a cause of concern. Drivers needs to feel safe in their workplaces and passengers should be able to feel they will have secure and tranquil journeys.

Transit Police have launched a new campaign warning the public to not touch the operator. The campaign is the latest move by authorities intent on better protecting the men and women who move Metro Vancouver’s commuting masses.

Transit union officials have also increased the reward for helping convict anyone who assaults a bus driver to a maximum of $15,000, up from $2,000.

Coast Mountain has increased foot patrols around the bus loops and stations, have made all buses a fare-paid zone, installed CCTV cameras, and have given drivers access to a stealth buzzer that alerts TransLink’s operators to an emergency on a bus.

There are steps being implemented to ensure the safety of bus drivers and those using public transit. Authorities have put strategies in place to ensure safety and although data shows that there is an increase in transit-related violence, it is still relatively safe to travel on BC’s public transit networks. However, this doesn’t remove the need for more research and resources into the effectiveness of existing strategies and finding new ways to keep drivers and passengers safe. www.desitoday.ca

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A GUIDE TO

By Det. Jag Khosa Combined Forces Special Enforcement Unit - BC

PART-II

I have been working in Law Enforcement Field for the past 8 years. During this time I have had the opportunity to work in a number of specialized units such as the Major Crime Section, Organized Crime Unit, Gang Enforcement Unit. At the community level, I have worked as patrol officer. I have a passion of police work and I was fortunate enough to get a number of opportunities where I was able to learn and apply my skills in order to become a better officer.

According to one notable Criminologist and gang expert, gangs in Canada are increasing 5 to 10 percent a year. Though this statistic may seem alarming, Canada is not immune from the gang culture that has plagued the entire western world, stemming from Central America all the way to North America.

Canada has always been ahead of the game. If we take appropriate action within our communities, we will be able to address the situation before it gets out of hand.

When dealing with gangs there are four different pillars that form the police strategy: • Education and Prevention • Intervention • Disruption • Suppression and Enforcement 24

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Parents, schools, police, and the community have a responsibility to ensure that a child never reaches the point of “Suppression and Enforcement”. Everyone collectively fails when an innocent child becomes involved in a gang.

Enforcement is absolutely necessary to tackle gun-toting gang members and keep communities safe from such blatant disregard for public safety however the importance of education, prevention and intervention/disruption should not be ignored. If we can educate and prevent an innocent child from getting involved in a gang in the first place, we would encounter fewer problems during the later stages. If we miss out on the opportunities to prevent such behaviour, then we should increase our focus towards early intervention in an effort to bring that child out of gang or criminal involvement.

Anytime a gang member is killed, the reaction is preventative measure failed him. Often times, it might seem as though the parents are at fault, an inadequate upbringing and absentee parents leading an individual to choose a gang lifestyle. Yet many times, gangsters come from affluent and stable homes. Parents alone cannot be blamed for “creating” a gangster. Communities need to start looking at the root cause of such tragedies. Where are these breeding grounds for gangsters?

As opposed to playing the blame game, let us explore, analyse and educate ourselves on what it is that leads a child to believe he has no other alternative but to join a gang. What is being perpetuated by the media, is cycle where the the story of a slain gangster on the front page will lead to subsequent stories about families mourning the death of a loved one, the members of the community blaming the parents, the police blaming the community for not cooperating, and the media, family, and community all blaming the police for not preventing it.

I write these articles to share my experiences as a police officer with the members of the community, parents of troubled teens, and with those who are thinking of joining a gang.

And most importantly, raise awareness against gang violence. These articles are to be threepart series to provide information on effectively tackling a situation where a child is involved in a gang.

In this issue, we will discover some of the questions that emerged in response to the previous article.

Below are some signs that will allow you to gain a better understanding of your child’s early involvement in gang culture. www.desitoday.ca

If your child: • •

•

•

•

•

•

•

•

Starts to show an increased interest in gangs, uses different slang language, etc.

Is sneaking out of the house late night or making short trips after dusk. Since a majority of criminal activities occur during the night, it is vital for you to monitor your child’s activities after dark.

Begins to brag about having friends who engage in gang activity to others. Similar to someone involved in a new relationship who becomes excited about their new found friend, they carry a tendency to speak about them constantly. In that way a teen that enters a gang may be excited and slips away things about gang affiliations.

Is coming home with items of value that they don’t have the money for, such as: new clothes, electronics, new vehicles, and unexplained cash.

Starts to get in trouble with the law for acts such as: fighting, vandalism or other forms of violence and destruction, parents must look into this. Remember that these offences could lead to more harsh and unacceptable behaviour (i.e. Shoplifting, robbery or even extreme violent acts).

Seems to prefer a particular colour or combination of colours in clothing towards another on a daily basis. Gangs separate themselves from other gangs through the colour of their clothing, creating a distinct identity.

A teenager who is stubborn and consistent about wearing the same colour could be associating with such a group.

Shows signs of avoidance and display rebellious attitudes towards people of authority (police members, teachers and other societal role models) You note negative changes in their behaviour like aggression, defiance and/or withdrawing from family and friends. Anytime a child’s behaviour changes in a negative way you need to take it as a red flag that something is wrong—gang activity or not.

Individual privacy is very important for all children during their adolescent years, however; if your child is being overprotective, starts to conceal their belongings and restricts access to their personal space, this may be a sign that your child is hiding something from you. Although this behaviour may be alarming, parents should be careful in their approach to this situation and should not destroy trust in the process.

A couple of these signs could be understood as typical teenage behaviour, but if you notice a few of these happening together then you need to take them seriously as they are strong indicators that your teen could be involved in gang or criminal activity. Take note of rumours that you may hear from neighbours, friends and family about your child being involved in a gang. When someone approaches you in an www.desitoday.ca

effort to share knowledge of your child’s activities outside of home, create conversations rather than countering their information in denial. Of course, rumours may just be rumours but keep in mind that any little bit of information about your child is worth investigating.

The only way to be sure is to be vigilant and have open communication at home. Always lend a listening ear to your child. At times, children will hesitate to speak openly with their parents, in which case it is best to seek a close family member or friend that your child confides in and looks up to. That channel of communication is vital for your child. It is important to note that spying on or stalking your child destroys trust. By simply being there for your child and by having that open line of communication, one can learn a lot about their values, beliefs and actions while they develop into adulthood.

During the early years, it is helpful as a parent to participate in school events and be involved in the school community. Take time to keep in touch with your child’s teachers on a regular basis. You will be surprised as to how much teachers can enlighten you about your child’s behaviour, friends and activities.

Question and Answers How do we stop our child from choosing wrong friends, shift their behaviour, and control their choices, without causing them to rebel?

Every child enters a stage where they face an identity crisis and are in search for a sense of belonging. Make sure to educate your child about the consequences of choosing wrong friends. Sometimes, a simple bed-time talk can do wonders. I cannot stress enough on the fact that listening helps more than talking. Be a good listener for your child and you will be amazed with how much your child is willing to share.

According to recent statistics, there have been 127 gang-related homicides in the lower mainland from the year 2006 to 2011. The average age is 30 and 95% of the victims are male. While the gang-murder rate and ensuing violence is declining, many of these murders took place in high-density areas putting the public at risk.

Don’t control them, guide them. There is a very fine line between the two. Show them that you care and guide them by setting positive examples rather than forcing them to follow your perspectives. Force creates friction and ultimately creates a rebellious atmosphere.

When we are aware that our child may be involved, what are the appropriate steps to take?

First and foremost, seek help. Do not try to hide the fact that your child has become involved in wrong activities. Talk to your friends, loved ones and ask for support, however; seek those who are capable of handling the situation and advising you in such a situation. It is also important to keep things confidential and to avoid making your child feel as if you’re making them “look bad.”

Show genuine concern for their safety, future and come across that way also. Inform them about the impact of “trivial” mistakes in the early years on the later years. Provide examples of both negative and positive role models around but never compare. Comparing children to others may undermine their confidence and stir rage from thinking you lost faith in them.

Should we expect that our child knows that gangster life is a wrong way of living?

Absolutely not! Always expect your child’s mind to be a blank slate shaped by a negative peer group, social media, video games, television and other external influences. It is your duty as a parent to ensure that the correct path is engraved on that slate and if by chance any negativity scratches it, be sure to re-emphasize the positive. Explain the dangers of gang lifestyle to your child and provide examples. These examples can easily be derived from our recent communal history, especially the past two decades. It will allow you to present aspects of the gang lifestyle that are short

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positive role model within their community. It could be anyone, a doctor, a police officer, a successful businessman, professor, a lawyer or a dedicated volunteer.

lived and ending with brutal death or lengthy jail-time.

What should I do if I know my child or relative is involved in gang or criminal activity?

During the course of my employment, I encountered many parents who had children either involved in a gang or involved in some form of criminal activity. I can attest to the fact that the majority of those parents felt incredibly helpless and stepped into the role of a bystander while their children continued on the path of self-destruction. Not every gangster receives support at home.

Every time there is a gang-related shooting or murder of a gang member, the story is splashed on the front page of local newspapers.

The readers’ comments surprise me the most.

The majority of the readers imply that somehow the family of the slain gangster was responsible for his untimely demise and they are worth the entire blame.

To some extent, every aspect contributed to the untimely death of a gang member and it would be harsh to solely place the blame on parents. I came across parents who quit, gave up and created a new norm with a gangster child in the family. This implies support and encouragement which allows the child to continue their descent into the criminal underworld.

When is the right age to enlighten our child of this dangerous lifestyle? In what ways can we communicate our strong negative opinion without coming across as parents who are just saying “no, it’s just wrong”?

In my experience, as soon as your child starts to form his own understanding of the gang culture through exposure to media, newspapers, radio, video games, peers, and parents should start teaching their children about every aspect of this lifestyle. They should shed light on the dangers, consequences and how the benefits are only short-lived. In short, there is no specific age in which parents should provide this information. Again, it’s important to have positive communication, reasoning and encouraging questions. This will give you the opportunity to listen to your child’s current thoughts, concerns and beliefs. Be honest with your child and show faith in their understanding with what you share. Shower your child with unconditional love and acceptance which we all seek in every stage of our lives, especially our younger years.

He sees it in the juvenile street gangs, who live in fear of death and who propagate fear by inflicting death to banish fear.

And he sees it at its worst, as the result of violent emotions bursting into the mind and erupting from the hands."

- Ed McBain ply that they do “know what they are doing,” and sometimes they really do. As a parent, you cannot automatically build a barrier through which your child becomes unable to express their strongly held perspectives. The best approach is to listen to your child and if you feel he/she are right in their opinion, do not hesitate to give them appropriate feedback. If you feel your child is thinking on the wrong track, reason and thoroughly explain why you believe it’s wrong. Merely stating, “because I told you it is wrong,” will not make a child speak up and leaves them confused. Children seek answers to their questions. They need reason and rationale and demand logical explanations. Deliver the messages in their language.

The last point that I would like to touch upon is the significance of having a role model in your child’s life. We all grew up idolizing someone thus; expect your child to do the same. Now it is up to you if you want your child to idolize a gangster who leads a “bling-bling” lifestyle or someone who has accomplished something more, something positive. Everyone can find a

BIO - Detective Jag Khosa

Combined Forces Special Enforcement Unit For the last 8 years, he has been serving as a Police officer starting as an enforcement officer in Alberta and BC, and then transitioning into hiscurrent role as a Detective with Organized Crime Agency of BC which operates under the umbrella of Combined Forces Special Enforcement Unit - BC (CFSEU-BC).

At CFSEU, he had an opportunity be part of many major case investigations relating to homicides, international drug trafficking, weapons trafficking and other activities of organized crime groups. These projects were aimed at disrupting and suppressing gangs and organized crime groups across Canada. On the enforcement side, CFSEU-BC has been doing a great job in investigating and hindering movement of these violent Organized Gangs however there has been a void in raising awareness against gang lifestyle. Now he feels this is the right time to raise public awareness and educate parents and youth with knowledge and the appropriate skills that they could use in their own journey towards happy families and safer communities.

He believes that it is imperative to spread the message that we as a community can take an active role at a preventative stage and no one has to fight this battle alone. Turning around a misguided young person starts with one-on-one intervention.

Parents who become involved with their child’s life from an early age had a higher chance of keeping their young ones away from negative influence of gangs. This article is his attempt to initiate a dialogue on a subject that has not been widely discussed. The Combined Forces Special Enforcement Unit of British Columbia (CFSEU-BC) unveiled a province-wide gang prevention public service announcement media campaign called “End Gang Life.”

You can visit www.endganglife.ca, which is linked to CFSEU-BC’s website (www.cfseu.bc.ca), and be taken to a specially created webpage where they can access and download posters, videos, and radio public service announcements along with information about gang prevention research, creating resiliency in youth, Crime Stoppers, and CFSEU-BC’s award winning 2013 Community Report.

Gang life is a

Dead END!

We feel powerless compared to the other external factors that are shaping our child (such as; friends, media and their physical environment), thus we choose to stay quiet. Although this may not be the best approach, what should we do?

Every child at one point in their lives will im26

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FEATURES

by Gary Thandi

R

n o i n eu the

I’d always known him as this strange and quiet old man that barely ever left his room, so imagine my surprise when he decided he wanted to go back home to India. Mom and dad tried to talk him out of it – not just because he was in poor health, but also because of what “they” might do to him if he returned.

Now normally I didn’t take any interest in his life, but all this made me curious.

He’d been living with us for ten years – ten years ago my parents took him in because his health was failing and he had no one to look after him in India – and he was the least interesting person I knew. “Who are ‘they’?” I asked.

“The same people that took everything away from him,” my dad replied.

“That was a long time ago,” my uncle said. “They’ve all passed on. They cannot harm me now. ” To me it was simple, and no skin off my back. “If he wants to, let him go,” I said.

“He can’t go alone, he’s too ill,” my dad replied “And we can’t get time off of work.”

“What about him?” my uncle asked, pointing to me.

My pleas for rest – I’d just finished my first year of university and needed winding down time – went unheeded. My parents gave me a choice: go get a job immediately or accompany my uncle back to India.

I decided a three-week vacation suddenly didn’t sound so bad.

We didn’t say much to each other during the flight. I did notice, however, that this sickly old man, who spent most of the flight hacking up a storm, wouldn’t stop smiling!

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We arrived at the village, and after my uncle retrieved the key from the caretaker, we walked over to his old run-down house.

“This was our home,” he said. “‘Our’ home?” I asked.

“Yes,” he replied proudly. “I lived here with my beautiful wife.”

I thought he’d always been single – too much of an odd duck to ever find a bride.

“You were married?”

“For much too short a time,” he replied.

“What happened?” I asked.

“Her family decided I wasn’t good enough for her. They told her to leave me, but she refused, so they killed her. Then they paid to have me thrown in jail to punish me for having loved her.”

This boring old man I had avoided for so many years suddenly became the most interesting man I knew. We went inside but didn’t stay there long – he proceeded to the back yard and I followed. He stopped at a wooden swing set and sat down on one of the seats.

“We spent hours in this yard, swinging back and forth just talking.”

Every day while in India, my uncle would tell me more about the one true love of his life. If she had just been allowed to follow her heart, she – my aunt – would still be alive. He didn’t have time to mourn – he was thrown in jail on trumped up charges - and was only released when he became so sick that his jailors couldn’t take care of him any longer. And that’s when my parents convinced him to come to Canada.

Our final day in India was soon upon us, and I was sad to see it was ending. “We should get going to the airport,” I said.

“I’m not going back,” he explained, labouring as he spoke. “It’s time I joined her.

She is waiting for me. Please help me up.”

I helped him walk over to the swing set in the back yard. He sat down on the seat and I backed away. He began to talk – but not to me. He was talking to her – about their future together, about everything they were going to do together.

At one point, he stopped talking, looked back at me, and said, “See? I told you she was beautiful.”

I smiled and nodded in agreement. I looked over at the empty seat beside him … I can’t say if it was just a gust of wind or something entirely different – but it was swinging ever so slightly, back and forth.

My uncle got up off the swing, and looked one last time back at me – he was smiling – it was a smile even bigger than the one he had when we first arrived - and then he slowly lay down and closed his eyes.

My uncle was no longer with us, but I couldn’t help but smile knowing who he was with. Once more they could be together.

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is

BACK! Click - to fit together; function well together; to succeed; make a hit; to become intelligible. Lounge - place to relax, hang out and have fun.

Well-known, successful marketing entrepreneur and pop culture maven Rina Gill will host a panel of South Asian women in a weekly talk show to discuss hot topics, local issues, beauty, fashion, politics, work-life balance, parenthood, and celebrity gossip and all other issues related to women. This show caters to “today’s women” and will reach the 18-45 year old age demographic.

Click Lounge will air on Sur Sagar TV every Wednesday evening from 7pm-8pm PST in BC (10pm-11am EST in Ontario) and episodes will also be available through podcasts on the Sur Sagar YouTube channel and the Click Lounge website.

Co-hosts: Media personality Mandeep Patrola, Communications expert Pardeep Sahota & rotating guest hosts Rina grew up practically glued to the television set. She was fascinated by a variety of programs from children’s shows 30

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to shows geared towards adults. She was especially fond of television commercials and while most people used the commercial in between for a washroom or snack break, Rina stayed in front of the television watching every single detail. At that time, most local commercials were done poorly and only a few were considered brilliant which were usually the big brand names who had advertising agencies producing their commercials. This was her first introduction to the world of advertising.

Rina completed post-secondary education with a degree in Marketing Communications degree and a Creative Advertising Diploma. She interned at a large advertising agency in Toronto while working parttime in the national marketing department of a huge tele-com company. She landed a job at a boutique advertising agency fresh out of school and until this day, it has been one of the most memorable experiences of her life.

Rina’s passion for advertising and marketing has steadily increased over the years; in fact she often says that she’s fallen www.desitoday.ca

even deeper in love with the industry. This passion has allowed her to delve into other areas of interest with full confidence. Rina is now self-employed as a marketing consultant and has worked with a variety of clients from small businesses to large corporate clients. She has volunteered with many non-profit organizations and prides herself as a community volunteer. In 2008, Rina ran for Surrey City Council and missed a seat by 1 spot with 18,888 votes. Nevertheless, Rina has continued to work hard in the community since then and pursue her plethora of interests.

In an effort to give South Asian women of all ages a platform to discuss hard-hitting topics and light-hearted topics at the same time, Rina started exploring the idea of developing a talk show. Inspirations of the time included Oprah and The View talk show which was hosted by Barbara Walters and a few co-hosts. There was a “hot” topics discussion on a daily basis and brought in a variety of guests.

Ideally, Rina would’ve loved to make it multicultural with women from all different ethnicities on the panel, however the South Asian community was a good starting point because although there are a lot of talk shows out there, none of them followed this format. South Asian women of all ages need a voice but in an environment that encourages sisterhood and open discussion/debates. Rina was prepared to work hard to make this happen.

In 2010, Rina’s idea of Click Lounge came into fruition when Shushma-ji offered her a timeslot for a weekly radio show on RJ1200. Although Click Lounge was a concept meant for TV, Rina took a chance with radio to get “her feet wet” as a talk show host. The experience proved to be invaluable and helpful in many ways. It wasn’t long before Rina was ready to record her first demo which went well but unfortunately business and personal priorities came into play and Rina had to put her dream on hold temporarily.

Fast forward to April 2014, Rina is bringing Click Lounge to the television airwaves through Sur Sagar TV. This opportunity has proven to Rina that perseverance is important in anything you are passionate about.

With an amazing support system backing her and all the determination in the world to make this project succeed, Click Lounge is back!

Click Lounge will air on Sur Sagar TV every Wednesday evening from 7pm-8pm PST (10pm-11pm EST) and episodes will also be available through podcasts online.

There are two fabulous women joining Rina as co-hosts, Mandeep Patrola and Pardeep Sahota. You can watch them on Sur Sagar TV or click in at www.clicklounge.ca www.desitoday.ca

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There are British Columbians with international degrees who have scored in the top 2% in the American licensing exams who will be going to work in the US, not because they want to, but because of the barriers and restricted opportunity to compete they face in BC.

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Canadian Medical Graduates Who Study Abroad Face

PREJUDICE AND BARRIERS When They Try To Return Home The Society for Canadians Studying Medicine Abroad (SOCASMA) states that entry into jobs for medical resident physicians, called residencies, is founded in a culture of entitlement and prejudice. Equal opportunity does not apply in respect to entry into one of the most prestigious professions in Canada. SOCASMA says that this is because the government has allowed Canadian medical schools, rather than the College of Physicians and Surgeons, to decide who gets their first job practicing medicine. The universities have set up a system that virtually guarantees their graduates jobs by prohibiting international graduates from competing against their www.desitoday.ca

graduates.

In no profession other than medicine, are qualified Canadians denied the ability to compete on their merits for entry jobs into the profession just because they obtained their degree outside of North America.

Canadian immigrant physicians and Canadians who chose to study abroad (CSAs) can only compete for the few resident physician jobs leftover after Canadian and American medical school graduates have had their first pick. Or they can compete with hundreds of others for a total of 34 positions in the International Medical Graduate stream for jobs as family physicians or in 3 areas of specialization: psychi-

atry, internal medicine, or pediatrics. Immigrant physicians and CSAs cannot access residency positions in 61 out of 65 medical disciplines in BC. And although these Canadians have paid for their own education, to be allowed to compete for these 34 jobs, they must sign return of service contracts agreeing to work where they are told after they become fully licensed for 2 to 3 years.

Many people believe that Canadians who study outside of Canada, do so because they were not good enough to get into Canadian medical schools. The most recent study done by the Canadian Residency Matching Service in 2010 found that Canadians chose to study at internaAPR / MAY 2014

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33

FEATURES tional medical schools for various reasons, including an inability to get into Canadian medical schools. However, the study found that 26.7% never applied to a Canadian medical school. More than half, 63.7%, never applied or applied only one time.

While on average a CSA applied to a Canadian medical school 1.76 times, a Canadian medical school student applied 2.95 times before getting in. A study by the Canadian Medical Students Association of Poland in 2013 found that only 2.6% of their students chose English language Polish schools because they could not get into a Canadian medical school. The most common reason cited for studying in Poland was that the medical program was high quality and time efficient. The second most common reason was a desire to explore the world. The third most common reason was the tuition fees were lower than in Canadian medical schools.

The CRMs study found that most CSAs were not aware that when they returned home with medical degrees, that there would be significant barriers to returning to work in Canada. CSAs thought they could return home to compete on their individual merits for entry jobs.

Another judgment commonly passed on CSAs is that they attend second rate schools and are second rate medical graduates. The Medical Council of Canada has established exams that weed out medical graduates who do not meet Canadian standards. Before any international medical graduate) is allowed to apply for a medical resident physician position in BC, (with the exception of medical graduates from oil rich Middle East countries who gain entry to resident physicians in BC by paying UBC $75,000 per year), (s)he must pass the national medical knowledge and skills (MCCEE) and clinical skills (NAC OSCE) examinations. The Medical Council of Canada states on its website that a passing grade establishes medical knowledge and clinical skills “are at a level of a Canadian medical graduate entering postgraduate training.”

The Times international higher education rankings for 2013-14 establishes that 3 out of the top 5 medical schools are in the United Kingdom. The other two are in the U.S.A. Oxford in England ranked first.

The University of Toronto is the highest

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ranked Canadian medical school at 15th.

UBC ranks 30th. Ten out of the 17 Canadian medical schools did not rank in the top 100 medical schools in the world. Currently one Canadian medical school, the University of Saskatchewan, is under threat of losing its accreditation.

Even Canada’s most elite scholars, recognized for exceptional academic and social achievements with a Rhodes scholarship to Oxford, cannot compete against Canadian medical school graduates for medical residency jobs. A Rhodes scholar with a medical degree from Oxford is restricted in British Columbia to competition in the international medical stream where 61 out of 64 areas of specialization are not available to him or her.

The Canadian medical education system makes it difficult to objectively evaluate how Canadian medical graduates stack up against international medical graduates.

A number of Canadian schools do not issue grades or class rankings. At UBC medical school grading is pass/fail.

Graduates of Canadian medical schools do not have to take national licensing exams to prove the extent of their knowledge and clinical skills before competing for residency jobs. The US, and most other countries, require all medical graduates, whether domestic or international, to write the same licensing exams to enable an evaluation on merit, not place of education.

There are British Columbians with international degrees who have scored in the top 2% in the American licensing exams who will be going to work in the US, not because they want to, but because of the barriers and restricted opportunity to compete they face in BC. Nor is admission into medical school based on uniform admissions standards.

For instance, UBC has admitted students into medical school with grade point averages as low as 70% and disregarded MCAT (medical aptitude test) scores. UBC Admissions states that these students were judged suitable to work in rural British Columbia. Two years ago CBC reported that less than 25% of the students who got into the UBC North medical program actually stayed to practice in northern and rural British Columbia as was intended. These students did not have to sign return of service contracts for the concessions made

on their lower admission standards.

Students with GPAs in the 90s or MCATs in the 99th% have been denied admission to UBC medical school because of inadequate volunteer work. Students who had to work through university and students who went to school while contributing to the physical support of their handicapped or elderly family members were disadvantaged in this way in the UBC medical school admission process.

The president of SOCASMA, Rosemary Pawliuk, states that an objective examination of the facts establishes that CSAs and immigrant physicians are not excluded from competition because they are not qualified. She says that the exclusion of Canadians who are legally entitled to work in Canada from competing for jobs as resident physicians is a function of the train coming off the tracks. Regulatory colleges are supposed to determine the rules for entry into the profession, not the university who has an interest in promoting its graduates and advocating for the perception that their education is top notch. Public interest is served when professionals are chosen on the basis of the best Canadian getting the job.

SOCASMA states that a medical selection system that protects Canadian graduates, and discriminates against and places barriers or conditions on other qualified Canadians from competing for entry level jobs into the medical profession, is unconstitutional and an affront to the principles of a free and democratic society. Pawliuk states, “CSAs and immigrant physicians are judged as second rate as a function of the fact that they can only compete in a second class stream. That is the beauty of power. You can foster an atmosphere of entitlement for you and yours, and prejudice against others just by prohibiting them from competing. One must ask, if international medical graduates are not as good as Canadian medical school graduates, what is the harm in letting them compete on their merits? They will lose. But if it is the Canadian medical graduates who cannot compete, then we have to ask the universities why. ” More information about how medical residency works and the barriers Canadian international medical graduates face can be found at socasma.com.

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The

‘DONKEY ROUTE’ to Britain: Hair-raising tales of illegal immigration Hell-bent on entering Britain, a group of young Punjabis board a container truck in Amritsar for their tough journey to jobs and riches. Freezing and bouncing, they arrive in Kabul, Afghanistan.

After a brief rest, they trundle to Krasnoyarsk in Russia’s Siberia. From here, the container truck rolls to Russian capital Moscow. The next stop is Belarus capital Minsk, before entering Poland for Warsaw and then on to Germany and finally to Belgium or France to take the ferry to Britain.

Shamlal Puri, a veteran London-based international journalist and a novelist, has tracked, interviewed and recorded the travails of these Indians at every stopover from Amritsar to London in a brilliant work of fiction - fiction based on fact - titled “The Illegals: Visa-Less, Homeless, Hopeless - Striving for the Good Life” (jointly published by Crownbird Publishers and Har Anand Publications), launched in Delhi and London a few days ago.

This is the hair-rising tale of 12 Indians cheated by a dodgy agent who extracts big money from them on false promises and sent them off on “the donkey route” through Russia

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and Europe to Britain.

Once in a while, the drivers stop at isolated spots to relieve themselves, stretch their legs and maybe sip some tea. Many of the travelers fall sick with no medical care during the real boneshaker drive. The money paid to the Indian immigration agent lasts halfway. Stranded in the middle of nowhere, they are forced to pay their own way for the rest of the trip. They beg, borrow and steal to pay the truckers.

The real test comes in crossing the English Channel as the police use digital scanners to measure the heat inside the containers to determine if any people are hiding. To avoid detection, they wrap themselves in thick, black plastic bags and are drugged. Sometimes, they suffocate to death. One tried to jump on the roof of the chunnel train from a bridge in France, missed the fast moving train and died.

Less than half of them survive the long road trip.

If discovered during the trip, they are imprisoned and deported.

When they flew to Britain for illegal entry, they were dubbed as ‘kabuttars’ or pigeons. If

they go by containers, they are called ‘faujis’ or soldiers battling against impossible odds. After reaching Britain, their ordeal takes a new twist as they have no legal papers to work, no home, not even proper meals. So now they are called ‘illegals’, living in fields, under motorway bridges, in four-wheeler bins and even in cemeteries in Southall, west London, eating from soup kitchens or gurudwaras and looking for work for a pittance. If they are caught by the authorities, they are deported and their employer fined 10,000 pounds per illegal worker.

“After reporting on ‘faujis’ for many years, my late father, Hussan Chand Puri, encouraged me to write a book to record their problems so that the Indian children and their parents do not have to go through this suffering,” Puri said.

“These desperate young men want to get away from Punjab at any cost. Jobless, they just want to start a new life no matter what the consequences”.

“Unfortunately, their worst enemies are the Indian British who employ - rather exploit them with far less than legal wages as they risk a huge fine if they get caught. Many small businesses have gone bankrupt by employing these faujis,” he added.

“Interviewing them is tough as they don’t trust anyone. They sound an alarm and threaten violence whenever a stranger comes to where they are sleeping overnight in the open fields even during winter or under a bridge. Desperate, homeless, jobless and homeless in cities, they sleep on the streets, in abandoned homes, garbage bins or even a cemetery. I joined a charity to reach out to them and spent time under bridges and in cemeteries in freezing winter listening to their painful stories. One of them is always alert as a lookout for a police raid during the night. www.desitoday.ca

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“Depressed and jobless in the UK, they seek solace with drugs. To survive the cold, they cover their bodies with oil. If they do not get meals from a soup kitchen they survive on tins of dog food scrounged from the bins or they go hungry,” Puri said.

“The illegals do not want to return to India because of the shame they would bring to their families and the huge loans, up to Rs.5 million, taken to pay the human traffickers and immigration agents. They try to enter into sham marriages with British and Indian women solely for obtaining British passports. Again, they are duped by some women.

Among the illegals are Indian engineers, lawyers, graduates, pharmacists and well-educated men. British immigration authorities raid these camps arresting, detaining and deporting them back to India. Others commit suicide. The book lifts the lid off the lives of paperless immigrants. Its drama and action does not stumble.

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Puri said: “Even if just one young man drops the idea of going to Britain by the donkey route after reading this book, my whole effort would be worthwhile.”

By Kul Bhushan, IANS www.desitoday.ca

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39

FEATURES

e b u T u o Y m o d r a t S r Indians fo It’s a career path your high school guidance counsellor probably didn’t tell you about. But for a growing number of creative, tech-savvy entrepreneurs, YouTube is no longer just for wasting time with cat videos. Through the YouTube Partner Program, the online video platform (which is owned by Google) sells advertising around videos, and shares the revenue with the channel’s creators. More views

lead to more revenue.

At the outset of the Partner Program, it was by invitation only. But in mid-2012, YouTube opened it up so that anyone can monetize their videos, as long as they’re uploading eligible content that people want to watch.

There are now more than a million YouTube channels around the world making money, with most earning anywhere

n g i e R s Ju

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Youtube anadian C a ri a is v n es a Reig He mak aka Jus t Singh escent. e d s, rants, e n n o m ia s s d a ri J compa njabi-In u ich m P o f o fr eos wh ging He is nny vid & eos ran fu l id v o m f o m o d n ety ran er A n songs to ture his broth o al c fea upan B friend R . His most stantly esi series D popular us J atures Mom fe Rupan as ith Reign w wag Song is S . m ich. his mo ular wh p o p ly huge

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AKakaAmazing Amandeep Kang is a Canadian YouTuber and popular online personality. He is well known by many Indo-Canadians due to the popularity of his videos portraying “brown parents” and what happens in the day to day lives of brown people. His most popular videos are of the “Living In a Brown Fam” series with each of them getting over a million views. AKakaAmazing is a resident of Brampton in Ontario which has a huge South Asian population.

from a few bucks to a few hundred a month. But thousands of YouTube users are pulling in six-figure incomes annually from ad revenues, said YouTube spokeswoman Wendy Bairos.

For those YouTube Partners, the earning potential isn’t limited to the ad dollars rolling in once a month through direct deposit. Several YouTube stars have learned how to capitalize on the exposure

provided by the video platform’s global audience, turning it into other real-world revenue streams: live appearances, merchandise sales, promotional deals and sponsorships.

“It’s like the new kind of startup. It’s the mom-and-pop shop that went global, or national — this is like the new way to do that,” said Bairos, reached at Google Canada’s offices in downtown Toronto.

“They’re brands in and of themselves …

They’re brilliant. I’m like, ‘Why didn’t I do this?”

Here are some entrepreneurs who have used YouTube to reach an audience of millions and build their own brands, and in some cases, have quit their day jobs to turn their YouTube channels into businesses.

Lilly S Superwoingh man

Lilly Sing h (born S epte YouTube as Superw mber 26, 1988) known o oman is of Indian n a Canad de ian YouT 2 million scent. She has 1 uber 72 millio subscrib n views a ers on h er chann nd el.

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LOVE & RELATIONSHIPS

THE SCIENCE OF MONOGAMY “There are a wide variety of open-relationship models out there, and they can vary drastically from one couple to another,” says David Barash, Ph.D., professor of psychology at the University of Washington and co-author of The Myth of Monogamy. “Having an open relationship can work really well for some people,” he says.

“However, as people, we’re also inclined to be sexually jealous of a partner being with someone else, and from a biological standpoint, we’re resistant to that partner having another relationship.”

You can view open relationships in one of two situations. There are the kind people engage in because their partner is a rock star or a politician and they’re getting something else out of the situation, like status. And then the other category is when it’s just a person who likes to have sex with a lot of other individuals. Both types of relationships can survive, but you have a lot of minefields to overcome to make it happen.

FREEDOM TO HUNT

: d w o r C a s ’ e e r h T e an

k a m o t How p i h s n o i t a l e R n Ope Work Some couples are agreeing to open their relationship to other sexual partners. We know the “benefits.” But what are the costs?

You love her, you really do, but sometimes you’d like some . . . variety. Perhaps a di erent body type. Or maybe you’d like to see or hear how someone else responds to your moves. It’s tough to suppress that natural “hunter” instinct. You’re not the only one playing video games well into the night to get that chick at the office out of your head. With about 50% of marriages ending in divorce, many reporting infidelity 42

APR / MAY 2014

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as the reason, some couples are challenging the boundaries of traditional relationships in order to keep the spark alive.

Call them cheaters, swingers, or “whatever couples”—the bottom line is these couples throw monogamy to the wind for a more open approach to their relationship. Sex with another person is allowed, but it’s not aunted or discussed outside the household. Their openness isn’t a license to bed everything in sight—respect and discretion rule. Those who’ve tried it say it isn’t always easy. But what if you could actually make it work?

Rapper Pitbull, 26, takes an extremely different approach to his relationship of nine years compared with that of other guys in hip-hop. The Cuban artist lives by the words Ojos que no ven, corazon que no siente, which loosely translates to “What the eyes don’t see, the heart doesn’t feel,” he says. “I’m not going to be worried about what she does when I’m not around. I think men are more bitches than women. They let their ego and insecurities come into play.”

Obviously, that means he gets to do whatever, too. In fact, the problem comes more from when her friends call her when they see Pitbull out with other girls. “She’s always like, ‘Yeah, I know, he told me.’ Other people’s bullshit doesn’t a ect us. We talk about everything,” he says.

Most of Pitbull’s friends in Miami aren’t as open, and they think he’s a bit nuts. “At the same time, they’ll be like, ‘Damn, I wish I had a relationship like yours,’” he says.

Guys like the idea of freedom for themselves, but the thought of their girl doing the same is too much to handle. “Men have to understand that women are loyal,” he says, perhaps naively. “If she gets something she likes, she’ll stick with it.”

“People are stuck on what’s normal, what’s right, what’s wrong,” Pitbull adds.

“Well, maybe what’s right to you is wrong to me. A couple from Kansas probably can’t even begin to imagine the kind of stu I’ve done or the type of relationship I have. What counts at the end of the day is everybody being happy.”

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LOVE & RELATIONSHIPS

DON’T ASK, DON’T TELL Once upon a time, if you lived in a small town, your options for the opposite sex were limited. You picked the hottest guy or girl at your high school (or at least the hottest one you could get), married them, and enjoyed your small-town life. Karm*, 28, an investment banker originally from Williams Lake, started getting into trouble the moment he moved to Vancouver. “My high school sweetheart followed me to university, so it wasn’t hard to stay faithful there,” he says. “Moving to the big city and traveling the world for work was another story.”

Although they married shortly after graduation from the University of Northern British Columbia in Prince George, he started cheating on her within months.

When his wife was pregnant with their first child, he stopped, but he resumed three months after she gave birth to their son. “I felt so bad, but I started to feel like I had made a mistake getting married so young,” Karm says. “It sounds like a complete copout, but I felt I wouldn’t be happy if I didn’t have the freedom to experiment.”

Although Karm simply figured this phase would pass and he’d eventually stop “experimenting,” he didn’t realize his wife was doing the same thing. That changed the day he spotted an unused condom in her purse. Instead of being mad, he was relieved. “I can’t explain why I didn’t ip out. I guess my own guilt forced me to deal with it logically,” he says.

That night they had a long, frank conversation about their relationship. Neither wanted to end it, but both agreed their desire to experiment with others wasn’t something they were ready to abandon just yet. “It was painful,” says Jessie*, “but the fact that we could be so honest with each other, I think, made our love stronger.” Full disclosure allowed them to clear the quiet tension that had been building between them. They now have an understanding but don’t discuss the details.

“It’s funny, but I don’t cheat as much as I used to,” says Karm, “and I look at things di erently. Before, I’d often wonder if I’d be happier with one of these other women.

Now, I know they can’t come close to what I already have.”

to men down here is like 10-to-1, and I took full advantage. Sometimes more than one girl at a time,” he says. Always believing he would stop once he met the right girl, he never considered he might miss this carefree lifestyle. “I thought being a horny dog would get it out of my system, making it easier to be faithful once I got married.”

He met his wife, Harpreet,* through family, of all places. It was love at first sign, and within six months the couple was engaged. They married six months later.

Harpreet, then a 23-year-old receptionist, had had only one prior sexual partner—just as Ajay had envisioned. “I loved that she was so beautiful and wholesome.

She was everything I dreamed of,” he says.

Except her inexperience showed—she wasn’t exactly an expert in the bedroom.

Ajay tried teaching her, but it was difficult and awkward, and it just made her uncomfortable.

Determined not to give up, he wondered if she’d be down to allow other women in their bed to show her. He brought up the idea carefully, stressing that he didn’t want to exclude her from his sex life and that he would never leave her. By this time, he also realized that giving up the occasional ménage à trois was easier said than done. “She listened, was quiet for what seemed like a long time, but then she said yes,” says Ajay.

“I was a little hurt, but he was so sincere; I felt a responsibility to my husband to at least try,” says Harpreet, who admits her willingness surprised her. “The rules were clearly drawn. The girls knew I was the queen, the one he had chosen, so they couldn’t compete with me on that.

And the way my husband controlled the situation, I felt very empowered, like I was directing the whole thing.” She says she felt comfortable learning from the di erent women and actually enjoyed watching

them please her husband. “Seeing firsthand how other women experience their sexuality has freed me from my hang-ups,” says Harpreet.

Now that he’s created a freak, does Ajay worry she might try out her new moves with someone else? “I’m really hoping she doesn’t, but what can I do if she wants to?

She’s handled my issues like a trooper,” he says. “I’m gonna have to do the same.”

CAN IT ALL BE SO SIMPLE? Clearly, being a “whatever couple” is not for everyone. Living such an unconventional lifestyle can make the already difficult challenge of maintaining a relationship even more complicated—even when it “works.” “Sometimes I struggle and think it’s wrong to give in to temptation, but I think it’s worse to destroy your family,” says Ajay. “I’m living the fairytale marriage because I know me and Harpreet are gonna live happily ever after. We’re committed to each other, and what’s more important than that?”

The key to an open relationship working is that both people really have to want it. Don’t push for one if your relationship isn’t working. You really have to have both partners in agreement. If not, it’s a recipe for complete disaster. But if you’re someone who thinks you can make it work, and you’re dating a like-minded individual, it just might be successful. As long as there are ground rules laid out and you adhere to them, and you’re with the right kind of person, those relationships can survive.

People are willing to be in a lot more di erent models of relationships than they used to be. The one-size-fits-all, let’s-get-married-and- never-have-sex-with-anyoneelse-ever-again thing doesn’t fit everyone anymore. In fact, some would say it never did.

INDECENT PROPOSAL Ajay* always knew he’d marry a “good girl.” He wasn’t looking for a virgin, but he wanted someone who’d only been with a couple of guys. “A whole bunch of dudes who could say they’d had my wife? That wasn’t going to happen,” he says.

In the meantime, the 30-year-old construction worker from Surrey did his thing with countless women. “They ratio of girls 44

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HEALTH & WELLNESS

t s e t t Fi

Make 2014 your

year yet.

With all the rain and cold temperatures it seems impossible to imagine warmer days.

But, make no mistake, summer is coming. Soon it will be time to crawl out of your cozy hibernation phase, peel off the layers and reveal your pale skin to the warm basking glow of a spring and summer sun. Whether you’ve gotten used to skipping the gym and hoarding comfort food, or have been pretty diligent with your fitness routine but lack motivation, it’s time to change things up and reignite your love for fitness. Let’s get your head back in the game with a few reminders about why you should get a move on with your training and diet. Spring and summer are just around the corner!

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Smaller clothes

Summer getaways

With warmer weather around the corner, it’s just a matter of time until the layers start coming up. Whether you’re ready for it or not, the time to dust off your teeny-tiny bikini is fast approaching. Be the first one to hit the ground running and looking midsummer amazing, when it’s only May. Set a concrete goal for yourself. Sign up for a local event or obstacle race, and start training for strength and endurance now. There are local and regional physique competitions in British Columbia; start researching what’s happening this year and look for competitions that are 16 or 20 weeks out. Training for a competition or race will give you a hard deadline while giving you an extra push to train harder.

If you’ve never felt comfortable in a crop top, work hard so that this year you’ll feel great in one. If you’re self-conscious about your slender arms, make this the year of the muscle shirt. Plan jogs or hike outside, go rollerblading. Get some friends together to set a pace for yourself and make it a cardio get-together.

It’s time to get your butt in gear for the summer getaways that you have planned.

If you’re planning on site-seeing, start now with 30-minute walks on the treadmill.

Choose a treadmill program that mimics the incline of being outdoors. If you’re planning on hitting a beach, get in the pool at a recreation centre and push yourself for a calorie-burning, lap-swimming workout.

Changing your cardio workout styles can not only lean you out, but can also prepare you for the vacation activities you have planned.

Wedding season The summer months are the most popular for weddings. If you’re among those getting ready to tie the knot, implementing a training program now will help you face the masses with extra confidence and a leaner, trimmer body. Use your own wedding or one that you are attending as an inspiration to push forward and create a new fit body. Try a new lifting routine or kick up your cardio with high intensity interval training. The more you amp up your training routine now, the faster you’ll see the results you want.

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Single & searching Use your time now to work on yourself and becoming the best and most confident version of yourself. Nothing is more attractive than someone who is strong and confident. Put your best foot forward and buckle down on a training and diet regiment. Working out and being physically active releases endorphins, makes you a happier and more balanced person thus opening you up to positive experiences in all aspects of your life. Reap the benefits of being active, and who knows, maybe the cutie at the cardio machines will notice your amazing new self.

Give yourself the power and momentum to push forward and start your sum-

mer season with the body and health you’ve always dreamed of having. Find inspirational people to surround yourself with, and ask them how they got to where they are. Follow your favorite athletes through social media or look up body transformations for inspiration, or join a local 30 or 90-day challenge. Remember that exercise and fitness alone won’t get you the results you want; your diet needs to reflect your goals. Drink plenty of water, stay hydrated and don’t forget to supplement your diet with actual supplements that you don’t get enough of through your diet. 2014 has barely started. It’s too soon to give up on yourself. Start now, or start again, and make it the best year of your life.

by Am Sahota Am Sahota is a fitness trainer and owner of Training Day Cafe. He has competed on a regional and national level in various sports including soccer, wrestling and weight-lifting. These days he splits his time between running Training Day Care and as a youth counsellor. His personal goal is to improve the health and well-being of today’s youth. Am can be contacted through his website www.trainingdaycafe.com.

APR / MAY 2014

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47

HEALTH & WELLNESS

The pains of bodybuilding

by Dr. Raji Grewal Back pain due to working out is very common. It is one of those damned if you do and damned if you don’t sort of relationships. For example when thinking of someone suffering from low back pain we would imagine a person that lives a sedentary lifestyle, eats poor and probably spends a majority of their day hunched over a computer. However, if you are an avid exerciser you are not exempt from back pain or injuries. In fact, many of those who lift weights suffer from back pain with the most common area being the lumbar spine (low back).

Back pain can be crippling and restrict many activities of daily living and lead to missed days at the gym, and we all know that is heart breaking news for bodybuilders. Back pain can range from occasional twinges to chronic long lasting pain.

What is it about bodybuilding that can lead to such severe and crippling back

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pain? Well, to begin one’s idea of what bodybuilding is needs to be addressed.

The goal should not be to get as big as you can but to build a balanced body that is as strong as possible in every single way.

Have you ever seen someone that can lift greater than 350lbs but is unable to do more than fifty pushups? So how does one achieve this overall body strength? By working out antagonistic muscles, i.e opposing muscles.

It is important to balance the forces on the spine. Work opposite muscles to equalize the strength therefore equalizing the forces on the spine. The exercises you choose and how you perform them are very important to determining your strength, flexibility and whether or not you suffer from aches and injuries.

Some of you may be shocked to read what exercises are actually the biggest contributors to back pain. So here it is people” bench presses, leg extensions, deadlifts, military presses and lunges. Basically the key ones you are doing on a daily bases. But don’t be scared.Tthis does not mean you have to eliminate them. We just need to make sure the opposing muscles to these exercises are also worked.

To give you a better understanding about the importance of this and why I am emphasizing opposing muscles, I’m going to focus on two of these exercises: bench press and leg extension. Both of these exercise muscles that are commonly used in your typical everyday activities, therefore are often prone to being overdeveloped. Chronic bench pressing and little target placed on the upper back can cause the chest to become overdeveloped and upper back to be weak. This leads to the hunched or turtle-back look where the shoulders are rolled in. This posture results in the chest muscles to be in a state of constant contraction and the upper back muscles to become over-stretched. Leg

extensions are not only hard on the knees but can lead to overdeveloped quads and weak/tight hamstrings. In summary focusing too much on the above listed exercises ends up creating muscle imbalances, or worsen existing imbalances. This in turn causes pulling of bones and joints out of their normal alignment. So what should be done to correct or prevent all this?

It’s time to start focusing on the “weaklings”, and by this I don’t mean the muscle groups that you think you are weak in. I mean the muscles you probably never work out. For example, shoulder rotators, hamstrings, glutes, hip rotators, lower abs, shins, the core stabilizers, obliques, transervus, rectus, psoas, quadratus lumborum, and to prevent low back pain the paraspinals. If you don’t work these “weaklings” or injure yourself working out it can land you in a chiropractic office.

A very simple definition of chiropractic care is that it is a complementary health care discipline which places emphasis on recognizing and treating mechanical disorders associated with the musculoskeletal system, more commonly in the spine with the goal of improved health via stimulating the nervous system.

Chiropractic care has been proven with great research as being a safe and effective treatment method to reduce or eliminate back pain. When I work with my patients who are bodybuilders or avid athletes, we work together to find which joints and muscles are affected. We target the weak muscles and stretch and relax the overworked muscles in conjunction with correcting any joint misalignments. A key emphasis is also placed on posture, diet and proper techniques. Chiropractic care is not limited to just the back we treat many non spinal related injuries as well such as elbow, knee and shoulder pain to name a few.

So remember bodybuilding is a sport that involves making your body proportionally shaped and fit. It is about great physical health. www.desitoday.ca

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CAREER & BUSINESS

4 WAYS THE WORKPLACE HAS BECOME MORE

Dangerous Tips for Preventing & Handling Disaster & Distress on the Job

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Disgruntled employees, workplace bullies, active-shooter situations, illegal drug use, ex-spouses and dissatisfied clients – all can be found in a random sampling of the 2 million people affected by workplace violence in the United States, according to the Occupational Safety and Health Administration.

“Of course, of the millions of reported cases, there are many more that go unreported; workplace violence includes any act or threat of physical violence, harassment, intimidation, or other threatening disruptive behavior that occurs at the work site,” says Timothy Dimoff, one of the nation’s leading voices in personal and corporate security who has worked with the U.S. Army, the Pro Football Hall of Fame, corporations, universities and non-profit groups.

“From demeaning jokes to sexual innuendos to genuine fear of shots fired at work, hiring managers and their bosses need to understand these problems of human nature and know how to react. In my decades of experience with law enforcement and as a security entrepreneur, I’ve seen the evolution of workplace violence and management often do not know how to respond.”

Dimoff, founder and president of SACS Consulting & Investigative Services, Inc., (www.sacsconsulting.com), which analyzes and overhauls security for large public and private facilities, reviews today’s problems and offers a path for conflict resolution and prevention.

•

Inadequate use of hiring tools: Know who you’re hiring! “I can’t emphasize this enough; this is the age of information, yet potential employees often provide falsified or misleading details,” Dimoff says. “With so many candidates and so much information available today, employers often overlook useful tools in a hurry-up effort to maintain productivity with a premature hire.”

There are many resources, including drug testing acknowledgment and consent forms; fully understanding laws including the Fair Labor Standards Act, equal employment opportunity guidelines and military leave guidelines; and simply knowing how to ask revealing questions to applicants.

•

Workplace intimidation & cyberbullying: Bullying is not exclusive to the schoolyard; it can follow adults into the workplace, and even home via email, texts and social media. “The first and best thing employers can do is prevention, and you do that by creating a positive and fair company culture,” Dimoff says. “Next, implement a zero tolerance policy for bullying; encourage employees to document and report bullying, www.desitoday.ca

Helping Your Business Run Smoothly!

and take those accusations seriously.

Hold occasional staff meetings so that employees are taught to recognize signs of bullying and everyone is reminded of the zero tolerance policy.”

• Gun violence: It can happen at what appear to be the most secure places in the world, and it can happen to the most innocent among us. Nidal Hasan, the U.S. Army psychiatrist turned jihadi, shot 13 fellow soldiers to death at Fort Hood, Texas. Twenty first-graders at Sandy Hook Elementary School never had the chance to become secondgraders. We hear story after story about shootings in movie theaters, parking lots and neighborhoods. Train managers to recognize and attempt to de-escalate the situation, which can include talking to the potential aggressor in an empathetic, non-judgmental way. Fail that, there are situations for which heroes are necessary.

• Violence against women: Homicide is the leading cause of death for women in the workplace, according to OSHA. Of the 4,547 fatal workplace injuries that occurred in the United States in 2010, 506 were workplace homicides.

Once again, this comes down to a zero tolerance policy for bullying and sexual harassment, applicable to all workers, patients, clients, visitors, contractors, and anyone else who may come in contact with company personnel, such as an ex-spouse. A well-designed onsite security protocol can significantly reduce the risk of severe violence.

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STYLE, BEAUTY, CULTURE

It’s fun to be first: summer 2014 fashion trends The summer 2014 season has shuffled off the runways of the big four fashion capitals, giving us plenty to look forward to. But let’s face it; we’re impatient. Not only do we want these pretty, shiny new things now because they’re pretty, new and shiny, we want them so we can get on top of the trends before everyone else does. It’s not only fun to be first, but the surest way to invest wisely in 2014 fashion pieces that will last.

And so, to help you get on top of what’s in store, here are five summer 2014 fashion trends you can start to wear now.

Cropped shirts for spring.

Ladylike lace: choosing romance for spring.

An inevitable and welcome evolution of the crop top trend, the cropped shirt has a classic, sophisticated vibe that lends itself to both feminine and masculine interpretations. Merging the old with the utterly fresh and new, there are plenty of ways to style the cropped shirt and make it a statement this spring.

Never far from mind as being the epitome of femininity, delicate lace has yet grown even more popular for spring. From skirts to trenchcoats, accents to accessories - the openwork fabric ruled the runways.

Saying it and saying it loud: statements and slogan.

From political messages and slogans, to attitude-filled comments and self-referencing, trademark-infringing, clever wordplays: letters printed on clothes aren’t quite what they used to be. Continuing as a trend into spring 2014, here’s where typography is taking us now.

Wide leg pants.

Relaxed, easy, cool: the three attributes that pretty much define what an ideal summer wardrobe should be all about.

Making a return amongst spring 2014’s fashion trends, wide-leg trousers came bearing those exact qualities, enhanced only by spot-on styling, as if to point out that sometimes baggy can be a terrific idea. Not to mention that nothing beats the comfort of loose pants, you’ll have to agree on that.

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The return of mid-cropped culottes.

The runways are always great in turning the unexpected into infatuation and in making the unsought utterly-cool again, that we all know. Following these same principles, the spring 2014 fashion trends marked the surprising return of the calf-skimming trousers known as culottes, as the cropped silhouette for women’s pants underwent a super-chic makeover.

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STYLE, BEAUTY, CULTURE

Young Adult novels featuring South Asians Writers of the South Asian diaspora, including Jhumpa Lahiri, Khaled Hosseini, Mohsin Hamid and Salman Rushdie, have explored South Asian culture and consciousness in their work. Several young adult authors have also crafted equally rich and compelling novels about South Asian teenagers, whose cares, conflicts, friendships and dreams are influenced by their ties to the subcontinent. These novels go beyond South Asian stereotypes to capture how culture impacts character and community, how humor and grace build bridges of understanding and how no one’s parents understand what they’re going through—no matter where they hail from.

With universal themes, these eight novels will enthrall any reader who wonders how a person’s heritage shapes her identity:

Does My Head Look Big In This?

Ask Me No Questions

Skunk Girl

Abdel-Fattah tells the story of 16-year-old Amal, who doesn’t care what people think when she starts wearing her hijab full-time. In this touching, hilarious novel, Amal realizes that no one’s acceptance of her faith matters more than her own.

In Budhos’ Ask Me No Questions, 14-year-old Muslim Bangladeshi Nadira lives with her family in New York on an expired visa. After 9/11, fear and suspicion of terrorism threaten to derail her dreams and split her family apart.

Karim’s novel tells the story of 16-year-old Nina Khan, who lives in upstate New York with her Muslim Pakistani parents and her genius older sister. Things get a little “hairy” when she falls for a new boy at school.

American Dervish

Born Confused

Blue Boy

Akhtar’s novel features a sweet, sensitive character in Hayat Shah. A Pakistani teen living in Wisconsin, Hayat finds his anxiety over his parents’ constant fighting lightened by the arrival of his mother’s best friend Mina, who encourages his interest in studying the Quran.

New Jersey teen Dimple Lala is the protagonist of Tanuja Desai Hidier’s novel, which explores the growing pains of adolescence. Dimple searches for a balance between her interest in photography, her desire to fit in with her white American friends and life with her Indian parents.

In Satyal’s Blue Boy, 12-year-old Kiran Sharma doesn’t fit in with the other Indian boys he knows in Cincinnati.

He loves putting on his mother’s make-up, playing with dolls and practicing ballet. But things start to look up when he realizes that his destiny lies not in normalcy, but in the tenth re-incarnation of the Hindu god Krishnaji.

by Randa Abdel-Fattah

by Ayad Akhtar

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by Marina Budhos

by Tanuja Desai Hidier

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Climbing the Stairs

by Padma Venkatraman During World War II, 15-year-old Vidya moves with her Indian family to her grandparents’ traditional household in Madras. After Vidya discovers her grandfather’s library, her desire for independence mirrors her country’s struggle under colonial British rule.

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FOOD, ART, ENT

Chickpea Salad PREP TIME: 5

MIN

RESTING TIME: 20-60

MINS SERVES: 4-8

This family favorite takes minutes to prepare, tastes awesome and keeps for 2 weeks (if it can last that long in your house!). A perfect spring salad for picnics, barbecues, and buffets.

Ingredients: 1 can chick peas (19 oz/540 ml), rinsed & drained ¼ cup cilantro/coriander, chopped, or substitute fresh parsley, ¼ cup onion, finely chopped 1/2 red pepper, chopped 1 large clove garlic, minced 3 tablespoons lemon juice 2 tablespoons olive oil cayenne pepper, to taste Crumbled Feta Cheese

Directions Combine all the ingredients together and toss well. Taste for seasoning. Let the salad stand for about 1 hour and serve.

Tips & Variations This is a great dish to accompany grilled meat, chicken or fish on the BBQ. It is great as picnic dish with other salads and some interesting breads to sop up the dressing. (Rosemary focaccia, French Baguette, etc). To serve as a main dish for light supper or lunch, just spoon the chick peas over endive leaves, baby mixed greens or baby spinach.

Mediterranean Chicken Bugers PREP TIME: 15

MIN COOKING TIME: 20 MIN

SERVES 4-8

Ingredients: 1 lb lean ground chicken 1 medium onion, finely chopped 1 tsp finely chopped fresh ginger 2 tsp finely chopped fresh garlic 1 big handful parsley leaves, finely chopped 1 tsp dried mint 1 tsp cumin powder 1/2 tsp coriander powder 1/2 tsp red chilli powder 2 tbsp fresh lemon juice 1 egg, beaten 3 tbsp chickpea flour, also known as besan 2 tbsp olive oil salt & pepper, to taste

Directions: Mix all the ingredients in a large bowl to incorporate well. You can set it aside in the fridge for a few hours or even overnight to intensify the flavours.

Divide the meat into eight equal portions and form into patties. You can also stretch out the portions to form mini sliders if desired. Grill until chicken is cooked through and both sides have slight charring effect.

If using an oven, bake in preheated 375 degrees for 20-25 minutes, turning once in between.

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FOOD, FOOD, ART,ART, ENTENT

Justin Bieber banned from Miami nightclubs Valeria Lukyanova transforms herself into a human Barbie doll The controversial and opinionated Valeria Lukyanova has transformed herself to look like a spitting image of a real-life Barbie doll. Lukyanova proudly admits to being obsessed with all things Barbie and claims that “Everyone wants a slim figure.

Everyone gets breasts done. Everyone fixes up their face if it’s not ideal, you know? Everyone strives for the golden mean. It’s global now.” And while the only surgery that Lukyanova will admit to having is breast implants, it’s fairly clear by her appearance that she’s “Barbified” herself in other ways.

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Justin Bieber is persona non grata at the hottest nightclubs in Miami. They ALL refused to let Bieber inside ... because he’s a bigger headache than he’s worth.

Bieber’s people called ahead to a few clubs last week, asking to reserve tables at LIV, Story, and Adoré while the Biebs was in town -- but the singer’s camp was denied at all 3 locations. Bieber’s people begged and pleaded, promising to spend big money on bottles if the clubs granted Bieber entry, but the clubs didn’t budge.

According to sources, there were 2 reasons for refusing Bieber -- first, he’s not 21 ... second, the last time Bieber went big at a Miami nightclub he was arrested for DUI. The DUI resulted in a ton of negative press for SET nightclub -- where Bieber had been partying prior -- and the guys at LIV, Story, and Adoré just didn’t think Bieber was worth the trouble.

Khloe and French house hunting?

Khloe Kardashian and rapper French Montana have been spending a lot of time together ... the kind of time that leads people to ask, “Are they an item?”

French is on the hunt for a new pad and took Khloe along to check one out -a 4,800 sq. ft. Hollywood Hills home that rents for $29,000/month. It’s a 4 bedroom, 4 bath house with a wine and cigar cellar, a sauna, and screening room.

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Jordan Belfort, the real-life ‘Wolf of Wall Street’ in hot water The real-life Wolf of Wall Street Jordan Belfort got an instant movie review -- from the U.S. Government -which took notice that Belfort was still living high on the hog despite owing millions.

TMZ has obtained legal docs filed by Uncle Sam 2 weeks after the movie premiered. According to legal documents obtained by TMZ, two weeks after the movie premiered, the US government zeroed in on 2 lavish homes they think Belfort owns in a swanky L.A. beachside community.

The government is putting its paws on the Hermosa Beach homes because Belfort is on the hook for $110 MILLION. The government placed liens on both properties in an effort to enforce the judgment on behalf of the investors he bilked. A company in NYC that got a $27K judgment against Belfort got a lien on a 3rd property in the same area.

It appears Belfort’s creditors believe he may be broke, but he’s still baronial.

Kristen Bell wants to be a “hands-on” mother The ‘Frozen’ star gave birth to daughter Lincoln in March 2013 - her first with husband Dax Shepard - and she is determined to take advantage of her time at home with her baby girl.

She told reporters, “I want to be very hands on. I want to cook for my family and feel present for them. I’m always missing her when I’m not there.”

The proud mother also admitted she would love the chance to work professionally with Dax again after they most recently shared the screen in 2012’s ‘Hit and Run’.

She added: “He’s been hired to write so many other projects for other people.

“I’m always walking into the room and saying, ‘Well hey, if there’s a part in there that you could throw the old bags’ way that’d be great.’ I would of course work with him again in a second. He’s able to work with his friends and me in a very collaborative way.”

The couple tied the knot in October, seven months after the birth of their daughter.

Bethenny Frankel penning kid’s book The 43-year-old reality TV star has been busy penning a story for youngsters, titled ‘Cookie and Peanut’, with the help of her three-year-old daughter Bryn.

Frankel told People.com: “She’s ‘[Bryn’s] the Peanut and my dog’s the Cookie. I’m reading her the book, and she’s kind of helping me with the story. She likes it - it’s really cute and she loves a good children’s book.”

Meanwhile, the former talkshow host has decided to take time away from her TV career in order to care for Bryn and work on her Skinnygirl cocktail company. She explained: “I’m taking a really long break right now - I want to focus on my Skinnygirl brand and my daughter. I’ve been working so hard for so long, and I just really want to rest and enjoy and just kind of be.”

However, the former ‘Real Housewives of New York’ star insists she won’t be returning to reality TV in the near future because she doesn’t like how intrusive it is.

‘Cookie and Peanut’ is due to be published in September.

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APR / MAY 2014

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FOOD, ART, ENT

FILM REVIEW:

LAKSHMI Direction: Nagesh Kukunoor Actors: Monali Thakur, Satish Kaushik, Shifaali Shah Nagesh Kukunoor’s Lakshmi is a disturbing film, in both a good and a bad way.

The story, about a 14-year-old sold into prostitution, is an amalgamation of fact and fiction. Nagesh, who has also written the film, doesn’t shy away from the horrors she endures. The direction is heavy-handed and overtly literal but effective.

It begins with a bunch of helpless girls already at the beginning of a dark journey to the depths of debauchery. Lakshmi (Thakur) is one of them, as she is transported into a seedy world where lollipops are anything but sweet gifts. The Reddy brothers (Kaushik and Kukunoor), despite their dodgy Andhra accents, are kingpin pimps and the first faces of hell for the young girl.

It is virtually impossible to not be alarmed by a topless Satish Kaushik, more so when you know exactly what he wants from his new ‘investment’ at the stroke of midnight.

Kukunoor achieves what he strives for; his film is brutally honest in its simplicity.

Much of young Lakshmi’s graphic ordeal is suggestive, complete with how her body struggles to accept abuse every night. Every time the door to her room closes, my stomach churned at the thought of what (or who) awaited her. The writing is deliberately repetitive, drilling in this horrific draining of innocence through routine violation. Jyoti (Shefali Shah) is the madam of this ‘Girls Hostel’, and hers is a conflicted character that drives home the helplessness of women trapped in this reluctant existence. She chooses to be the most desperate symbol of maternity, providing for her own girl by auctioning bodies of other girls.

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Bollywood Buzz Kukunoor’s strength is also his weakness; his unfussy way about storytelling doesn’t always work for his supporting characters. Ram Kapoor as the lawyer and the courtroom scenes are particularly superficial— a bit too matter-of-fact for my liking. Little more than cell phone cameras have been used for stock shots of the city, a piece of lazy filmmaking that disrupts the narrative. If not for Monali Thakur as Lakshmi, these glaring errors would have been

unforgivable. Her fragile face bears all the scars of a traumatising, yet transformative experience. She couldn’t have debuted in a more essential role, adding to the impressive list of female-driven films this year.

Lakshmi is not without its flaws; the sort of topical theme Madhur Bhandarkar would have chosen at his prime. It makes you cringe for important reasons though, and must be watched for its relentless pursuit of relevance and authenticity.

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Bollywood Buzz

MOVIES -

OF THE SOCIETY! Cinema is not just about fictional tales or entertainment; it is also a reality check for the society.

Recently, I read a gut-wrenching article on Rajasthan’s Nirbhaya titled “Waiting for the 20th surgery”. The author unraveled horrifying details about the gang rape of a girl who was so brutally assaulted by six men in Jaipur in August 2012 that her vagina tore and merged with her rectum.

The girl was only 12-year-old the time.

Coincidentally, I ended up watching Nagesh Kukunoor’s “Lakshmi”, also based on a true story on child prostitution, during the same time and reiterating the fact that moviemakers, often attacked by the moral police for promoting crime through their cinematic work, make films that mirror society, where crime, especially against women, is on an upsurge.

Kukunoor is not the first filmmaker to take a keen interest in crime against women in reality to try to sensitise viewers on crime.

Jagmohan Mundhra’s “Provoked: A True Story” on domestic violence is the real-life journey of Kiranjit Ahluwalia, who moved to Britain from Punjab in India after marrying Deepak, and ended up being the victim of domestic violence.

After being tortured physically and sexually, Kiran killed her husband and ended up in jail. But she was freed on appeal and 62

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her case changed the face of British justice.

Before that Mundhra had brought on the screen another heart-wrenching tale of a rural woman through “Bawandar”, a film based on the true story of Bhanwari Devi, a rape victim from Rajasthan, and her fight to get justice.

It’s debatable whether films fan crime in the society, but movies do daringly unravel harsh realities on the big screen. Except that sometimes, the truth is harsher than what is shown.

Be it the crime committed in some murky lanes, dingy shanties or nightlife hot spots or in the highest strata of society, filmmakers do not hesitate from showing the truth.

Reacting to the rise in the crime against women, people have often blamed women for venturing out unescorted, especially after sunset - and inviting trouble.

But what would a woman do when a near and dear one sexually assaults her?

Recently, it was reported that a teen was raped by her father’s friend in Delhi’s Gymkhana Club; Mira Nair had showed in “Monsoon Wedding” that women are vulnerable in the confines of their homes through Ria’s character.

Recently, in “Highway” director Imtiaz Ali touched upon a similar issue by showing how the protagonist, played by Alia Bhatt, is sexually abused by her own uncle.

Rajkumar Gupta had successfully brought on the big screen the Jessica Lal murder case through “No One Killed Jessica”. Model Jessica Lall was gunned down in a restaurant in the capital in 1999 and the director decoded the sequence of events for the audience in the film.

If you go back in the past, there have been films like “Insaaf Ka Tarazu”, “Pratighat” and “Damini”.

It’s not that filmmakers’ focus only on women-centric topics, they scrutinise different types of crime - for instance, “Shootout At Lokhandwala” and “Shootout At Wadala” took a closer look at the Mumbai crime world and real life gangsters Maya Dolas and Manya Surve respectively who were gunned down by the police.

The thriving coal mafia in Jharkhand was the theme of Anurag Kashyap’s twoseries “Gangs of Wasseypur”, while Tigmanshu Dhula, in the biopic “Paan Singh Tomar”, showed how athlete Paan Singh Tomar turned into an outlaw.

Ram Gopal Varma told the story of Paritala Ravi, a murder accused and one of the most feared individuals in southern politics, through his “Rakta Charitra”, which was released in two parts.

So, movies are indeed a mirror of society!

By Arpana, IANS www.desitoday.ca

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I am ready to be in a relationship: Parineeti Chopra Bollywood actress Parineeti Chopra put end to rumours of her dating anyone during her appearance at the finale of celebrity talk show ‘Koffee With Karan’. The ‘Ishaqzaade’ actress further said that she is ready to fall in love and get into a relationship. Parineeti Chopra said, “I really want to be in love.

I genuinely want to be in a relationship.” The actress has been linked with ‘Ladies vs Ricky Bahl’ and ‘Shuddh Desi Romance’ director Maneesh Sharma.

Deadmau5 to drop the beat with Daler Mehndi Canadian EDM icon Deadmau5 and Punjabi bhangra star Daler Mehndi set Twitter ablaze after the two exchanged a string of tweets giving props to each other. Deadmau5 started the interaction when he tweeted that he prefers Daler Mehndi’s music to that of Yo Yo Honey Singh, and then began working on a remix of Mehndi’s “Tunak Tunak Tun.” When Deadmau5 tweeted Mehndi, it was unclear what would happen. After a series of back and forth tweets, Mehndi posted a few more photos on his account, including one showing him with a Deadmau5 t-shirt. Meanwhile, Deadmau5 tweeted the Instagram link featuring the remix of “Tunak Tunak Tun.” On March 17th, Deadmau5 uploaded a video to YouTube called “Coffee Run!!! ft. Daler Mehndi!”, which shows the two artists chitchatting in a Lamborghini. Mehndi later attended Deadmau5’s show that evening.

Is Uday Chopra pressuring Nargis Fakhri into marriage?

Uday Chopra and Nargis Fakhri are as different from each other as chalk and cheese.

We all know Uday is super rich and amazingly talented when it comes to handling his diligently followed Twitter account.

Nargis on the other hand is super sexy, absolutely haughty and incredibly hopeless when it comes to expressing herself in front of the camera. Together Nargis and Uday make for a deadly couple, indeed!

But here’s a major twist in the juicy tale.

We hear that Nargis is an ambitious girl who loves to live her life on the edge. After making a swift entry into Bollywood, the leggy lass has set her sight on Hollywood now.

Uday on the other hand, at 41, wants 64

APR / MAY 2014

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to settle down in his life since he is beyond fame and money. Not that he achieved either, on his own, but the guy has seen starts and superstars rising right before him through his papa’s (and talented brother Aditya’s) production house. Nargis is not particularly keen to tie the ceremonial knot as yet while Uday is looking for a proper wifey.

What makes things worse in this scenario is that Nargis’s adventurous past that suggests that the babe had dumped her previous lover boys and love-life to live the way she wanted to-with no strings attached. And history, as we all know, has the tendency to repeat itself. Should Uday take a cue? www.desitoday.ca

Irrfan Khan is a fantastic actor, says Spider-Man Andrew Garfield

NOTARY PUBLIC

Spider-Man actor Andrew Garfield who recently visited Singapore to promote The Amazing Spider-Man 2 for Earth Hour along with girlfriend Emma Stone and Jamie Foxx is all praises for his co-star and Bollywood actor Irrfan Khan who was part of the earlier Spider-Man flick!

The actor was also quizzed about his Bollywood innings to which Andrew jokingly said, “I know its pretty big. Its pretty cool. You have to learn to dance!!” Well, we’re sure Andrew hasn’t caught one of Irrfan’s films, right?

However he seemed vocal and sang praises for the Life of Pi actor, “Yes, Irrfan Khan! He was in the first Spider-Man movie in 2012 and I think he’s a fantastic actor!!”

Considering that Irrfan‘s film Life of Pi was one of the frontrunners at the Oscars, he could not have missed Mr Khan. An looks like Irrfan is soon replacing Aishwarya Rai Bachchan and Anil Kapoor as the most known Bollywood faces in the west.

Nandita Das, Parmesh Shahani among 2014 Yale World Fellows

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Mohinder Singh

604-614-7591 With the addition of Nandita Das and Shahani, India has more fellows in the global Yale World Fellows network than any other country since the programme was established in 2002 by the New Haven, Connecticut-based Ivy League university.

The Yale World Fellows Programme is Yale University’s signature global leadership development initiative and a core element of Yale’s ongoing commitment to internationalisation, according to the university.

“Like prior cohorts, the 2014 Yale World Fellows are dynamic, high impact practitioners committed to effecting positive change,” said Yale World Fellows Director Michael Cappello, professor of paediatrics, at the Yale School of Medicine.

“Das and Shahani fit that mould perfectly and will bring immense talent and vision to the group.”

Nandita Das “has leveraged her interna-

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tional profile to campaign on social issues including child mortality, gender and race issues and violence against women,” the announcement noted.

Parmesh Shahani heads the Godrej India Culture Lab, described as “an experimental ideas space in Mumbai at the intersection of academia, business and creative industries”.

Das and Shahani are among 16 World Fellows selected in 2014 from a pool of about 4,000 applicants, the university said in a media release.

The 2014 group also includes an Italian robotics engineer and artist, a Pakistani environmental lawyer, a Syrian peace activist and a 2012 candidate for president of Iceland. This year’s cohort brings the total number of Yale World Fellows since the programme’s inception in 2002 to 257 Fellows, representing 83 countries.

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65

FOOD, ART, ENT

Meet Shashaa Tirupati The Indian singer you’ll love listening to (and looking at) Shashaa started singing at the age of five, and never imaged she would have a career as a Bollywood Playback singer, singing the old Hindi melodies of Mohd. Rafi and Lata Mangeshkar over a local radio channel, Radio Rim Jhim, in the well-received show ‘Aapki Pasand, Aapki Zubaani’, hosted by Vancouver’s beloved radio host, Rockin’ Rakesh.

How was our city’s very own Shashaa Tirupati, popularly known as Reecha, to know she would one day be giving voice to megastar Deepika Padukone in a Rajnikanth and Deepika Padukone starrer film! But, what comes even beyond that, in her own words, as the “greatest blessing of Bappa (Lord Ganesha) she could have asked for in this lifetime” and what she considers her ‘big break’ in Bollywood after having sung for over 15 films, lies in the fact that she has sung a solo song in the film for Academy Award - Oscar Recipient, A.R. RAHMAN, her childhood idol, inspiration and the sole reason for her singing. The song is called Vaada Vaada (Female) for the film Kochadaiyaan.

It was back in 2007 when Vancouver’s first

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Red FM Idol was selected for one of India’s biggest television singing reality shows, Zee TV SaReGaMaPa, when Shashaa (Reecha) had decided to move to Mumbai to create a niche for herself in singing for Hindi film songs, commonly known as playback singing. Post reality show she stepped into the competitively creative realm of advertising. Having lent her voice to actors including Kareena Kapoor, Katrina Kaif, Hema Malini and Amrut Maghera, she established herself over the next couple of years as a much sought after jingle singer and voice-over artist with over 500 advertisements to her credit. After having sung for some of the biggest international brands, her first opportunity as a bollywood playback singer came with Director Priyadarshan’s film Bumm Bumm Bole, starring Darsheel Safary. Following Bumm Bumm Bole, Shashaa’s discography grew with films including Turning 30, Be Careful, Hostel, Boys Toh Boys Hain, Yeh Stupid Pyar, Jo Hum Chahein, and Karle Pyar Karle to name a few. She had the opportunity to sing for famed Tamil music director GV Prakash Kumar, who also happens to be the nephew of Oscar Winner

AR Rahman. The song, called “Oday Oday” from the film Raja Rani, topped Tamil charts, and the film proved to be one of the greatest blockbuster hits of 2013 and all- time. Other regional films with songs credited to her name include Nimirnthu Nil (Tamil), Aiwain Raula Pai Gaya (Punjabi), Tere Ishq Nachaya (Punjabi), Jandapai Kapiraju (Telugu), Pipani (Marathi), Powder (Unreleased, Marathi), and Coffee Aani Barach Kaahi (Releasing July 2014, Marathi).

But what is the story behind Shashaa’s “big break” with AR Rahman? It started with auditions for MTV Coke Studio Season 3 where “Sir”, as she respectfully calls the Mozart of Madras, was in search of a group of female singers for his Hindustani Choir on the episode. She auditioned for the slot and bagged a position on the choir. A month after the telecast and raving reviews of the AR Rahman Episode, she received a call one fine morning from Panchathan Studio, Chennai: she was asked to come down south for a song the maestro wanted to try her voice for. That song was “Vaada Vaada”.

“It was a dream of an experience... How it all happened has still not sunk in. Sir knows exactly what he wants, and his judgment is beyond commendation. Rahman Sir and the entire team at Panchathan made the entire experience very comfortable and they’ve made me sing and sound better than I could ever have imagined doing on my own!

As far as my song Vaada Vaada is concerned, this song means to me what defined Rahman Sir to me when I was growing up, as it was HIS music that taught me what I should really be listening to. It takes me to the AR Rahman I’ve worshipped for almost two decades, be it with Roja, Bombay, Taal, or Guru, to name a small handful.

Now its Vaada Vaada and Kochadaiyaan.”

Shashaa is currently touring and performing with AR RAHMAN in his world tour RAHMANISHQ. As of now we wish her the very best for her soulful song sung with pure divinity in Kochadaiyaan, and another dozen songs with the maestro to come!

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DESI

Around Town with Pardeep Sahota

Advanced Education Minister Amrik Virk made a budget presentation at Surrey’s Grand Taj Banquet Hall last week.

Mrs and Mr Paul Bhogal with Tarannum Thind and Riz Rajwani at an exclusive reception at Fruiticana owner Tony Singh’s residence in Surrey.

At the fundraiser for a multicultural long-term care home by PICS Society last Saturday with guest speaker Wally Oppal.

At the grand opening of India Bookworld, B.C.’s first South Asian bookstore, by Asian Publications last Saturday at #117B, 12888-80th Avenue (York Centre) in Surrey.

THE India Club honored five top Grade 12 graduates - Siddhant Malik, Ishmeet Singh, Shishir Gopinath, Purujeet Monga and Nikhil Prakash - recently. The special guest speaker was Ravi Shankar Aisola, Consul General of India. Other guests included Indian Consul and Head of Chancery R. Chandramouli, former MP Ujjal Dosanjh, Raj Chauhan, MLA for Burnaby-Edmonds, and Sav Dhaliwal, Burnaby Councillor.

At the Sanatan Cultural Society of B.C.’s Holi celebration at Punjab Banquet Hall on March 21.

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DESI

Around Town with Pardeep Sahota

Bollywood singers Mohit Chauhan and Mamta Sharma at an exclusive reception at Fruiticana owner Tony Singh’s residence in Surrey.

At the Nagar Kirtan on the 637th birth anniversary of Sat Guru Ravidass Ji organized by Shri Guru Ravidass Sabha Vancouver-Burnaby on March 22.

At the 40th Anniversary bash of the India Mahila Association at Vancouver’s Fraserview Hall on March 14.

At the Yellow Cab elections at Vancouver’s Fraserview Hall.

Those elected were Kulwant Sahota, Dev Janda, Manjit Pabla, Satnam Jaswal and Rana Lodhra.

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APR / MAY 2014

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69

LIFE ETC.

I Grew Up Being Slut-Shamed

By My South Asian Parents

by Fariha Roisin

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On a recent trip to visit my dad in Abu Dhabi, where he now works and lives, I was reprimanded for what I wearing -- a loose boatneck tee with baggy printed pants -not by a stranger, but by my father. I hadn’t seen him for years, and had thought we were past this stage. I stood there, first flabbergasted and then frustrated, on the verge of tears that I only unleashed later in the privacy of my own space. For me, the ignominy of being rebuked by my parents has a far greater effect than many might imagine.

For years I wondered why I suffered from such severe body dysmorphia, unsure why I couldn’t accept myself for all the things that I am. Even if I couldn’t fully believe that I was beautiful, I wanted to at least allow that I was -- I am -- a human, a woman, alive, and that I have so much to be grateful for. But the seemingly innocuous things that many parents say to their children -- about what they wear, how they act, their weight, their acne, the size of their nose or their ass -- affect how children learn (or don’t learn) to accept themselves.

Passing comments are loaded, as was this comment from my father. It was loaded with the history of our family and the interactions I had growing up with parents who always seemed to disapprove of my style choices, always encouraging me to dress better (read: more conservative, less slutty).

Growing up in a South Asian household has its downsides. I understand generational and cultural gaps will always create some kind of disconnect; my mother’s style icon is Jackie Kennedy, whereas I’m more of a “whatever” kind of girl. There are things she couldn’t condone my wearing, and that’s OK, but for me it really comes down to how that’s communicated. My parents judged and criticized my clothing constantly. I was side-eyed anytime I wore something they deemed inappropriate (which was most of my wardrobe). If I wore anything tight, they harassed me until I changed.

South Asian mothers like to ridicule.

They think it builds strength, but it really just enables brutality. Telling a young girl she can’t wear what she wants because it’s not appropriate encourages the idea that men’s reactions should dictate society’s norms, and that all women are metaEves, tempting and ensnaring men with our sultry-eyed gaze. My parents’ culture is steeped in patriarchy, in the philosophy of the one-step machismo machine, where there is just one kind of man, and two kinds of women: the angel and the whore. These limited ideas of masculinity breed men who want ownership of women. www.desitoday.ca

From a young age I was taught that it was my responsibility to make sure I didn’t attract unwelcome attention or stares. Unfortunately for me, most stares are unwelcome, whether they’re meant to be positive or not. Somehow I always feel the burn of the male gaze. If a man gawks at me, it never feels admiring or uplifting, but rather insidious. Men ogle with no remorse, as if you’re their property. But it’s not admiration; it’s toxic.

When I was younger, if I wanted to wear anything my mom considered inappropriate, she’d look me dead in the face, her eyes burning, and ask, “Why not just walk around naked? At least that gets right to the point.” It was rarely useful and always insulting advice. I started believing my body was a sin.

I had an ass, I had tits, and I would stand in the shower pressing down hard on my chest, wishing my breasts would go away, pinching my nipples in the hope that they’d fall off. I didn’t want to bear the brunt of my mother’s anger anymore. I didn’t want to be seductive. But to her, I was. She unwittingly sexualized me through this whole process. I grew up far quicker than other girls my age because I understood the weapon between my legs. But instead of being excited by it, I was dangerously ashamed.

In later years, my mother would suggest that if I walked around in short skirts then I would get what was coming to me -- as in rape, or any kind of sexual violence.

According to her, there was no reason a

woman wore a short skirt other than to “ask for” harassment. To me, it seemed she was suggesting that fashion was only for men.

The frustrating politics of this language is that it implies women are responsible for rape or sexual violence -- the only crime where the victim is guilty until proven innocent. The New York Times published an article in March about the linguistics of the word “homosexual,” and how the oldfashioned terminology denotes the historical implications of that word. Like the “n-word,” which is loaded with meaning, “homosexual” also has a legacy, as does the language that describes women, and their assaults.

In his new book, “White Girls,” cultural critic Hilton Als imagines himself as silent film star -- and child sex abuse survivor -Louise Brooks, writing, “My beauty was a conduit for violence against me.” So, too, are all acts of violence against women, whether physical or verbal.

My parents’ language sowed deep seeds of self-doubt, which have left me feeling confused and alienated. I know, in the end, my parents thought that they were equipping me for the world, and I know they never intended to hurt me. But the shame they taught me hurts, and its roots are deep. So parents, take heed: there are more effective ways to open up dialogue.

Teach your sons to respect women while they’re young, and treat your daughters with respect. Never underestimate the power of your words.

APR / MAY 2014

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71

LIFE, ETC.

Teenage Prostitution in India One of the most heinous forms of crime - teenage prostitution has pierced its fangs deep into the heart of Indian society.

Amid the glitz and grandeur of the Indian streets, howls the withering childhood of 1.2 million children who are forced into the quicksand of prostitution.

A petrifying story of the degradation of humanity, teenage prostitution in India is rampant in big cities and small towns alike.

Teenage prostitution involves children as young as 13 years old who are trapped in the mortifying circle of trading their body for wages.

These hapless children are either abducted from various regions, from neighbouring countries and sold as prostitutes, or they are sold by their very own parents to pimps.

The whole situation becomes more repulsive as we correlate this phenomenon of teenage prostitution to a developing country like India. Besides the abduction of young ones and selling them to brothels, there is another factor that pares the vanity from the human soul in the name of teenage prostitution.

The reason is simple to comprehend; with problems ranging from poverty, lack of education and limited opportunities among a population of over a billion people, many a time the marginalised are caught in the eye of the maelstrom of 72

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prostitution.

A child born in a destitute household, where resources are scarce, might end up being treated as a liability. The result is a situation where parents see their descendant as a source of their income to salvage

them from the debt bondage, hence forcing the teenagers to tread the path of prostitution.

Another factor which aids this crime to propagate and strengthen its root in Indian society is the birth of children in the red

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agers who are already involved in prostitution, not just by a handful of organisations, but with the collective efforts of an entire society. Then and only then, can we see

the statistics depicting teenage prostitution receding and a bright sun soaring high and beaconing a brighter future for an entire nation.

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light area. The children born in brothels are shrugged off in their early years and assigned the task of household chores until the time they can contribute financially.

With a lack of awareness and a thin chance of salvaging their childhood, the ramification is an unintentional introduction to the hell-hole of prostitution which impacts the latent thinking of children and their lives. The facts all reflect the same.

Approximately 20 per cent of all prostitutes in the red light districts of India are children. 25 per cent of the child prostitutes have been abducted and sold. 8 per cent have been sold by their fathers to escape debt ridden situations.

As far as the long term impact where flesh slavery is concerned, the observations are heart-wrenching. They are tortured, flogged, degraded and forced into submission through the deprivation of food and water. Besides the physical toll that prostitution takes on them, mental and psychological trauma engulfs their lives and they are left with a bleak hope for a better future.

The notion of parenthood eludes them and social ostracism limits their intellectual potency. With depression, fears that putrefying their body and souls, these sleep-deprived teenagers are enveloped by the perpetual darkness of despair. Some of the teenagers are encouraged towards the use drugs by their exploiters. With drug abuse and flesh trading, teenagers are left with turbid thoughts and a minimal level of mental development.

Though teenage prostitution is one of the biggest social issues in India, sadly this topic is treated with apprehension in both society and the media. The media brushes the entire topic under the rug because of its ‘offensive’ nature. People in society try to look the other way when it comes to a healthy discussion about the possible course that should be adopted in order to eradicate this maelstrom once and for all. Over the years, organisations such as Global Hope India have been pumping up resources in order to provide facilities to the poor with a steadfast aim of helping children grow out of poverty and into a wonderful and bright future.

But the need of the hour is to accelerate the development of the poor and teen-

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LIFE, ETC

Indian invasion on

Restaurant magnate Vikram Vij is poised to join the cast of CBC’s Dragons’ Den this spring. The BC based restaurantowner will be joining remaining dragons, marketing maven Arlene Dickinson, personal finance guru David Chilton and franchise king Jim Treliving.

Vikram Vij immigrated to Alberta in 1989 and has been dominating the West Coast restaurant scene for more than a decade. He opened his first restaurant in Vancouver in 1989, which has been graced by celebrities like Martha Stewart and Harrison Ford — despite its strict no reservations policy. Since then, Vij and his wife have opened two more restaurants and launched a line of pre-packaged curries sold in grocery stores across Canada.

“I love looking at entrepreneurs that have either had family businesses or have had their own passion and they have churned this passion from a milk to butter ... Those are the kind of people I would love to share my wealth with and knowledge,” Vij said.

“I’m going to be a practical Dragon. And if you want me to take my wallet out and give you some money you better make sure that you have lined your ducks in a row properly.”

This won’t be Vij’s first time on TV. He has already been a judge on the Food Network’s Top Chef Canada and Chopped Canada, as well as CBC’s Recipe to Riches.

Aanikh Kler from Vancouver, BC was also recently pitching his ringtone, UndrTheRadr Ringtones, to the Dragons.

UndrTheRadr is a set of ringtones that only teens can hear, meaning they’re able to get all the texts and phone calls they want and adults will have no idea. When you download UndrTheRadr, you’re not only getting ringtones that only youth can hear, you’re also supporting Free The Children, an international charity dedicated to providing education to children and teens in developing countries. 20 cents of every $1 download goes to helping teenagers around the world get the education they need to change their lives.

Dragons’ Den, which earned a Canadian Screen Award for best TV reality series earlier this month, features entrepreneurs pitching business proposals and ideas to a panel of venture capitalists, who must then decide whether or not to invest in the projects.

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LIFE, ETC

LETTING GO OF SHITTY RELATIONSHIPS

Some relationships are incredibly pernicious. We often develop relationships out of convenience, without considering the traits necessary to build a successful bond with another person—important traits like unwavering support and shared trust and loving encouragement.

When a relationship is birthed out of convenience or proximity or chemistry alone, it is bound to fail. We need more than a person’s physical presence to maintain a meaningful connection, but we rou76

APR / MAY 2014

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tinely keep people around because … well, simply because they’re already around.

It’s easy to develop a connection with a coworker or a schoolmate or someone who’s always there—even when they’re not adding any real value to our lives. And it’s even easier to stay in those relationships. That’s because old relationships are convenient, and starting new relationships is difficult—it requires work. But so does anything worth holding on to.

We’ve all held on to someone who

didn’t deserve to be there before. And most of us still have someone in our lives who continually drains us: Someone who doesn’t add value. Someone who isn’t supportive. Someone who takes and takes and takes without giving back to the relationship. Someone who contributes very little and prevents us from growing. Someone who constantly plays the victim.

But victims become victimizers. And these people are dangerous. They keep us from feeling fulfilled. They keep us from www.desitoday.ca

living meaningful lives. Over time, these negative relationships become part of our identity—they define us, they become who we are.

Fortunately, this needn’t be the case.

Several actions can be taken to rid ourselves of negative relationships.

First, you can attempt to fix the relationship. This is obviously the preferable solution (albeit not always possible or worthwhile). People change over time, and so do relationships. You can change how your relationship works—be it marriage, friendship, or family—without completely ditching the relationship.

Sit down with the person who’s draining the vitality from your life and explain to them what must change in order for your relationship to work. Explain that you need them to be more supportive, that you need them to participate in your growth, that they are important to you, but the relationship in its current state does not make you happy. Explain that you’re not attempting to change them as a person; you simply want to change how your relationship works.

Finally, ask them what they’d like to change about the relationship. Ask them how you can add more value. Listen attentively, act accordingly.

Or, if you’re unable to change the relationship, you can end it altogether. This is incredibly difficult, but it applies to any relationship: family, friends, lovers, co-workers, acquaintances. If someone is doing nothing but draining your life, it’s perfectly acceptable to tell them “This relationship is no longer right for me, so I must end it—I must move on.”

It’s OK to move on. You owe it to yourself to move on. You owe it to yourself to be happy with the relationships you have.

You are in control.

Moving on is sometimes the only way to develop new, empowering relationships. Starting anew, empty-handed and full-hearted, you can build fresher, stronger, more supportive relationships—important relationships that allow you to have fun and be happy and contribute beyond yourself. These are the meaningful relationships we all need.

It’s also important to do your part. You too must add value to the relationship.

Not by buying gifts or commoditizing your love, but by showing up every day and rigorously exhibiting how much you care, demonstrating your love through consistent actions, continually going out of your way to help the other person grow.

You see, both people must do their part to grow the relationship. Only then will both of you be satisfied with the relationship you’ve built.

by Joshua Fields Millburn www.desitoday.ca

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LIFE ETC

AMAVASYA (THE NIGHT OF NEW MOON)

November 30, 1982. Our Delhi-Haridwar bus, with wife Tripta, daughters Aparna and Shachi and me, reached Haridwar around 4, in the afternoon. Though the city is located on the banks of the glacier cold Ganges it felt much warmer compared to the weather we had left in Vancouver.

As quickly as I could climb the roof top of the bus, I unloaded our luggage off and made a run home leaving Tripta and the girls walking behind slowly, getting acquainted with their new environment and absorbing its cultural shocks.

As I reached closer to my familiar turf, I spotted mom standing alone at the door, without dad, focussed on every passing bicycle rickshaw and three wheeler, screen78

APR / MAY 2014

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ing for familiar faces of her family.

That’s strange! Where is dad? Usually it is he who announces the new arrivals to mom, “Come, look, who is here?’ I increased my pace; climbed the steps up the front door and touched her feet, gave her a big hug and asked, “Where is dad?”

“He is in bed. He hasn’t been feeling well,” she responded. I grabbed her arm and rushed her to his room.

“How are you dad?” not waiting for a response, I threw myself on him taking him in my arms.

“Ishwar ki daya hai, God is merciful,” and anxiously asked, “Where is Tripta?

Where are the little ones?” Perhaps he was afraid lest I might have left them behind in

Vancouver.

“They are coming,” I assured him.

“How long will you be with us this time?

There is very little time left.”

“Very little time left for what?” I asked with curiousity.

“Time for me to go.” dad responded.

“Go where? If you wait a while I could accompany you,” I said.

“No, there I go alone,” dad replied.

“But where are you going?” I asked again. “To be with my God,” he answered without hesitation.

Lord! It didn’t take him five minutes to break into his philosophical conversation.

“Mom, what is he talking about?” I turned around and asked her, who was trying to www.desitoday.ca

leave his room for the kitchen to make tea.

“You know your dad? He is always fishing for attention,” she responded waiving her hands in the air.

In the mean time, Tripta and girls arrived and entered his room. When Tripta saw dad lying in bed, she hesitated touching his feet. Touching a person’s feet, who is not sitting or standing up, but lying in bed, is considered inauspicious, unless the person is dead. But then, she leaned forward and touched them anyway and instructed the children to do the same.

Dad blessed them with his customary pronouncement, “Live long. Live happily.”

Then he started chatting with them. Their Hindi-English-pidgin opened a door for me to sneak out to the kitchen for tea. But as soon as I returned, dad asked me again, “How long will you be with me this time?”

I noted his change from plural ‘us’ to singular ‘me’ and replied, “We are here until January 5th.”

“That will be before January 15th; before my birthday. I won’t make it anyway.

I had been waiting for you. My time is up,” he spoke confidently, not sounding like he was fishing for my attention, as mom suggested.

After that prophecy, I could not keep standing. I sat down on the edge of his bed to talk to him, but all I could say was, “Dad,” and burst into tears.

“Don’t cry. We have time. We will talk,” he attempted to comfort me by touching my arm, and suggested that we should go visit aunty Kunti. She must be waiting for us.

Aunty Kunti lived a block down dad’s place. Widowed at age sixteen, within six months of her marriage, aunty Kunti was mom’s younger sister. We called her, “masi” as in ma (mother) with the suffix -si, (like), meaning someone like a mother.

I tried to stand up, but wobbled and sat down. All that surge of energy that I experienced, just an hour ago, when I climbed the bus to get of luggage down, seemed to have left. I managed to drag myself to masi’s home, somehow.

As soon as masi heard the knock, she came running. Masi looked much thinner and a bit darker. She always did in winters.

Winters could be very hard in India. But then what is soft in India? I questioned myself, and the answer was resounding nothing. After a brief conversation masi looked anxious to leave. “If you are thinking of going to make tea, please don’t. We already had it,” I told her. She heard me and sat down to detail our sleeping arrangements.

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and grandfather, and Ram, my elder brother, whom she raised, leaving for Nigeria, masi had been living by herself, though mom was always around to support her and sleep at her place every night for company. We also always stayed at her place whenever we returned home. After a short visit, we left to mom for meals, but soon moved back to masi’s house for the night.

Exhausted after that long plane journey from Vancouver to New Delhi and followed by a six hour of bus ride to Haridwar, everyone was yawning and looking ready to hit the floor; literally, as there were not enough cots for everyone. We were a grand total of eight; four of us and four of Ram, including him, bhabhi--my sister-inlaw and two of their children: Shuchita and Sudhanshus, plus masi. Coincidently, the time we arrived to visit the family, Ram and his family were already there from Nigeria.

They were there to finish the construction of their house for an eventual return from Nigeria.

The next morning, when my bhabhi tried to wake me up for tea, I was in the middle of a dream. Actually calling my dream a nightmare would be more appropriate-I was sitting on the stairs outside facing the main street and watching different species of vehicles passing by. I saw dad coming towards me. He was dressed in my white kurta, a collarless shirt, looked very young and handsome. A few years ago, I had that white shirt tailored to wear at one of my nephews, Shekhar’s, first head shaving mundan ceremony. Since then, I had made it a point to bring this ceremonial shirt back every time I returned from Canada.

“What’s up dad? Where have you been?”

I asked. “I had a doctor’s appointment,” he responded casually, like that was not a big deal.

“Did you say a doctor’s appointment?

Well, what did the doctor say?” I asked anxiously. I knew dad was not the type who would go to see an allopathic doctor.

They were much too western for his Indian taste. He was Vaidya and Hakeem kind of a person.

“He has given me thirty days.”

“Thirty days! Thirty days for what?” I asked.

“Thirty days to live,” he responded.

I did a quick calculation; 30 days to live means December 31, and then I woke me up with a loud outburst of, “Oh my God.” Ram, who was sitting not far from me sipping tea, asked, “What are you ‘Oh Godding’ about?”

“How long has he been sick?”

“How long who has been sick?” he asked.

“I am asking about dad?”

“For about ten days.”

“Ten days?”

“Yes,” he repeated.

I went speechless. His health concerns continued to churn my inside. Yesterday, he told me that there was very little time left. His time has come. He would not make his birthday. Last night, he told me that he has only 30 days to live.

“What is going on?” I wondered. “How come he never wrote to me about his health? In the past, he had always kept me informed of every little minutia; who was getting married, who had a baby, who found a new job, how the next-door neighbour Brijlal swindled his younger brother, who died, and certainly who attended whose funeral and who did not or could not. He even wrote to me when Chandra Kiran, our next door neighbour passed away. Munia, his middle son arrived from Pilani right away, but Omi, the Amrikawala, the one who lives in Syracuse, did not.”

I knew my elders were philosophical about life. But dad’s exclusive details about life’s gloomy details were his warning bells to me that he too could slip away anytime, and I might not be around during his last hours. Many times he had compared me to a lone peacock dancing in a distant green forest, where there was no one to admire its performance or its lovely feathers, except the peacock itself.

And mom, well, I knew mom’s pain was mom’s very personal property, not to be shared even with her Ration Baby, her youngest son. Several times I had heard her quoting saint Rahim, “Rahiman nij man ki vyatha manahi rakhiyo goy, suni ithlai log sab baant na le hai koy”: Hide your pain within your heart. When people hear it, they only draw a pleasure out of it. It seems that either she does not trust me any longer or thinks that our physical distance—she being in India and I in Canada -- has de-sensitized me to her pain. Who can blame her? Once bitter, twice shy.

“Who is the doctor?” I asked Ram. “Right now he has been receiving Ayurvedic treatment. But I am going to bring Dr. Chauhan today,” he said.

“Who is he? Do you know him well? I asked.

“Dr. Chuhan was my classmate. He has a family practice. The trouble with him is that he is hard to get hold of. He is a devotee of Kali. He leaves home first thing in the APR / MAY 2014

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79

LIFE ETC morning for her Chandi mountain temple and does not return until noon.”

Dr. Chauhan being my brother’s classmate did not make him a good doctor, at least in my books. “Then how will you get hold of him?”

“I will leave a message with his housekeeper. Your nephew, Sudhanshu can do that.” As far as I knew, Sudhanshu did go to the doctor’s residence and did leave a message with his housekeeper, but he did not bother to make a house call. After waiting the entire day, we went to his clinic in the evening. The clinic was a disgrace, a hangout; there was nothing professional looking about that place.

Ram reported dad’s condition. The doctor hummed and hawed and scribbled a prescription on a scrap paper, but I was not satisfied with his diagnosis; actually I was pissed. When I invited him to come home and examine the patient in person, his response was a flat no. “There is no need to see the patient. My friend Ram has already given me all the details of his condition. They sound pretty accurate.”

For the next four or five days, the quack continued to treat dad, neither did he make a house call, nor did dad make any progress. On the contrary, he got worse having difficulty passing water, stool and keeping food down.

My situation being the youngest son was precarious. I could not say much about my elders’ choice of treatment. I had no experience with Ayurvedic or Homeopathic medicines, whereas, Ram grew up with our grandfather, who was a practicing Homeopath and versed in Ayurvedic medicines. Elder brother Shashi claimed to know quite a bit about Ayurveda, because he could pretty well interpret Nighantoo, the encyclopaedia of Ayurvedic medicines.

Who the hell was I to question their expertise, especially when I had been out of dad’s life for so many years?

After eleven days of our arrival in India, Ram, who had already been home for almost seven months, had to return to Nigeria. So, after finishing the construction of his house, he left with his family. Unfortunately, shortly after they departed, Shashi fell off the attic and broke his leg. In the beginning, he did not pay much attention to his injuries, kept treating them with Ayurvedic remedies, but to no improvement.

Every time, I asked him to have his foot X-rayed he downplayed his pain and my concerns. Finally, when his pain became unbearable, his wife took him to the hospital. She told me the doctor literally scolded him for taking so long to see him. X-ray 80

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confirmed a fracture.

Ravi, our eldest brother, the son, who might have received the most parental love and attention as he had arrived after the birth of three daughters, should have assumed the responsibility of his father’s treatment. But even dad’s sickness did not thaw his perm-frost bitterness towards him. So, with Ram gone, Shashi limping around on crutches and Ravi having an unbecoming filial relationship, I was the one to take over dad’s treatment responsibilities.

The first thing I did was to check around for a good doctor. Shashi recommended Dr. Taneja. He measured Dr. Taneja medical knowledge, his diagnostic expertise and experience, on the number of patients he used to see waiting in his clinic every day on the way to his store. When I arrived at Dr. Taneja’s clinic, I noticed there were at least six patients ahead of me, but he decided to come with me right away.

After examining dad, Dr. Taneja quietly handed me a long list of medicines and instructed me to start the treatment without any delay. However, before he left he touched dad’s forehead gently and assured him that he would visit him the next day.

His parting gesture made dad so happy that he showered him with blessings and called him “God.” Then, before driving back to his clinic, he asked me to walk him to his car. “Your dad has been suffering from pancreatic cancer. You took too long to start a cancer treatment. Now, do not waste any time.

Start the medicines right away. I will come tomorrow, same time.” Inside, mom, masi and Shashi were waiting to hear what the doctor had to say, but I chose to keep his diagnosis to myself and left to get the prescription filled right away.

Days went by, dad showed no signs of progress. Watching him decay was heart breaking. I began to suspect my ability to care for him at home. I considered putting him in a hospital for a close supervision and care of doctors and nurses. I shared my thought with the family, assuming they would support me. I was wrong. No one did, not even the patient. Actually, the patient raised the strongest objection; almost a verbal attack. “He is tired of looking after me. He wants to dump me amongst strangers.”

When I heard dad talking about me, in third person, I knew he was not only opposed to my suggestion, but he also found my suggestion deeply insulting. He did not say, “You are tired of looking after me. You want to dump me amongst stranger.” Dad

used the third-person-pronoun, ‘He’. One thing very important that I have learned in life is that whenever, in a family situation, facts battle against emotions, facts usually lose. My suggestion to admit dad into a hospital was based on facts, but his and my family’s reaction were based on emotions.

The writing was on the wall. I should have known could not win.

Thus feeling completely misunderstood and falsely accused, I decided to leave dad’s room and find some solace in the veranda, watching strangers go by.

While sitting alone and feeling emotionally beaten, I had an epiphany. Once I recalled once dad had his horoscope charted by a Varanasi specialist. I must find it and take it to our family priest for a reading. It is not unusual for believers to combine dava (medicine) with dua (prayers).

The thought of showing dad’s horoscope to the priest suddenly performed a magic for my psyche and energy level. It birthed a new hope. I immediately stood up and launched a search for that chart. After spending almost an hour going through all the possible places where it could have been placed or stored, I found it up in the attic, stuffed in a round shaped tin container collecting dust.

Immediately, I decided to take it to Pundit Vishnu Das. I asked Tripta to come along for company and moral support. But I was not sure that we would find him at his residence. He could be anywhere performing ceremonies.

“Let’s go. We will take a chance. People always take a chance. They just show up at the door. Who makes appointments in India, especially in small towns like Haridwar? How many families have telephones here? Even our own family does not have one,” Tripta made a good point.

“Then, let’s take a chance. shubhasya sheeghram, ashubhasya kalaharanam.

When you have a desire to do something auspicious and good, do it immediately (as later you might encounter barriers to it), and when you wish to commit something evil, you should delay it.” Ravana, the rival of Lord Rama had once given this wisdom to Lakshmana, Rama’s younger brother, which I passed on to Tripta and left to hire a rickshaw.

[To be continued…]

By Dr Suresh Kurl Dr. Suresh Kurl is a former university professor; a retired Registrar of the BC Benefits Appeal Board and a former Member of the National Parole Board.

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