Desi today english february 2016

Vol. 7 | Issue 1 | Feb-Mar 2016

HARJ NAGRA:

Local Music Producer With International Fame

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HOMETOWN HERO:

Jas Dhillon Playing for BC Lions

20 THINGS I Wish I knew in my 20’s

What’s in a Name?

Foreign Name Prejudice and Hiring

MasterChef CANADA

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what’s inside Features 08 2016 The Year of Our Daughters’ Lohri 10 Harj Nagra: Local Music Producer With International Fame 12 SAAV: Young South Asians Bettering The Community 14 20 Things I Wish I Knew In My 20’s 18 Hometown Hero Jas Dhillon Playing For BC Lions 22 Facebook: Neither Good Nor Evil 24 How Replacing The Words “I’m Sorry” With “Thank You” Can Change Your Life 26 MasterChef Canada’s Youngest Contestant: Surrey’s Jasdeep Sra 32 Earthquake Safety Tips 34 What’s In A Name? Foreign Name Prejudice and Hiring 36 Jasmeen Johal Walks Lakme Fashion Week In India 38 Codependent Indian Females 40 How The Government Can Increase Social Inclusion And Social Mobility 42 From Teaching to Law: Preetka Brar’s Journey 44 Group Learning Makes Kids Active Decision-Makers

Love & Relationship 46 48 49 50 52 53 54 56 58 59

Top 10 Creative Places To Take Your Partner The Tinder Phenomenon Does Your Birth Order Affect Your Personality?

Candlelight Captivation: Interesting Secret To Making You Look More Attractive Is Your Mother Facing This Addiction? The Indian Drama Debacle 15 Ways To Make Someone Feel Appreciated Without Spending A Dime Let’s Meet For Coffee: Joti’s Advice Column 5 Times You Must Get Out Of A Relationship Can Drugs Help Reduce Domestic Violence?

How Long Before The First Kiss? Saying “I Love You?” Study Reveals Averages

Health & Wellness 60 Tips On How To Stick To Your Health/Fitness Resolution 61 Back And Knee Problems From Improper Exercise 62 Speeding Up Your Metabolism 63 Cotton Candy Machines Pave The Way For Artificial Organs 63 Thumb Sucking: When Do Cute Habits Harm Your Child’s Teeth?

64 Stop Treating Google As Your Doctor

Beauty & Entertainment 66 “I Cut My Hair For Salman Khan” : Prince Narula 67 “Great Expectations” Apart, “Fitoor” Stands On Its Own : Katrina Kaif 68 Freedom Of Expression Can’t Be Hurtful To Others: Kangana 69 “I was Born Here, I will Die Here” : Aamir Khan 70 Upcoming Movies 72 Bollywood Inked: The Tattoos Of Your Favourite Actors and Actresses

Beauty & Entertainment 74 76 78 80 82

Around Town Lots Of Hypocrisy In India Regarding Women “The House I Can’t Forget” Does Chicken Tikka Have A Nationality?

Horoscope

Publishers Sanjeev Katyal Rakesh Gupta Editor Parveen Sohal Writers Parveen Sohal Amrita Lit Tina Goulart-Rallhan Dhiraj Khatri Navjeet (Joti) Bajwa Jasmeen Rahiman Alex Sangha Suresh Kurl Layout & Graphic Design Mohammed Ahmed

Photos by Jay Mahi Photo Studio Surya Photo Studio Chandra Bodalia Cover photo by Jay Mahi Photo Studio Letters editor@desitoday.ca Sales Desi Today Group: 604.502.6100 info@desitoday.ca subscribe@desitoday.ca email: editor@desitoday.ca Published By Desi Communication Inc. #102-9360 120 St., Surrey, BC V3V 4B9 604.502.6100

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With Lohri season ending and Valentine’s Day beginning, we have brought you the latest stories with topics that have been on everyone’s minds! We bring you a research study on the increase in girls’ Lohri party, how candlelight scientifically makes you look more attractive to your partner and much more!

Our proudest story is Surrey’s Jasdeep Sra who is representing the South Asian community as a competitor on the renowned show MasterChef Canada. Desi Today is the first to have a sitdown conversation with the young carpenter who, before going on the show, was working to help support his single mother and brother. The young talent has much to say about his cooking style, his hopes for the show, and how proud he is to be representing the community and all of BC on a national television show.

Our community never has a shortage of amazing talents who are rising to new heights to make us proud. Desi Today has also featured: BC Lions’ Jas Dhillon, music producing phenom Harj Nagra, Lakme Fashion Week model Jasmeen Johal and the philanthropic efforts of the young men and women of “SAAV.” This edition of Desi Today is also created to serve as a learning tool for our readers. Have you ever wondered what people wish they knew when they were 20? We’ve got you covered! Ever wondered what you’re supposed to do if we suffer another earthquake? We’ve got you covered! Ever wondered if your Indian name affected your chances of getting a job? We’ve got you covered there too! From “cover to cover” we bring you the newest and most informative articles to meet your February and March reading needs.

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FEATURE

2016: The Year Of Our Daughters’ Lohri

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By Parveen Sohal

“We surveyed 89 couples that had kids in the 1990’s and found that out of the couples who had a Lohri party for

their sons, only 7% had any type of celebration for their daughters. In comparison, we surveyed 72 couples who had children starting in 2010 and found that 24% had some type of Lohri party for their daughters.”

This past Lohri may seem to pass uniformly with its typical grand celebration and zeal like any other year. However, we have found that this January the 15th brought out something very notable within our community: equality.

Lohri is traditionally a holiday used to celebrate the birth of a son in the family (most famously, the first born son by a newly wed couple). This year, it seems more and more families are choosing to celebrate the birth of their daughters than ever before.

Our survey found that a substantial 8

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

number of Lohri parties for girls are taking place. Most notably, the peak number of girl Lohri parties occurred in 2016 and some were even held in banquet halls.

This shows the great progression in women’s equality over the years among the South Asian community. “Lohri is starting to be less about celebrating the birth of the first born son and more about celebrating the birth of the first born child,” said one food vendor that provided catering servicing for many Lohri parties this year.

Having a Lohri party for both girls and

boys sets the precedent that both genders’ are to be celebrated and that males do not have some sort of “birth right” to any special treatment for something as arbitrary as their gender.

Lohri celebrates fertility of crops in Punjab and the fertility of newlywed couples so they continue getting larger and more prosperous.

Today, we see the minds of the Indian community becoming more fertile: giving birth to new ways of thinking; giving birth to the idea that women are without a doubt equal to men. www.desitoday.ca

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FEATURE When you’re dancing along to your favourite modern Punjabi hit, the master behind the music magic may be local music producer Harj Nagra. The Surrey born talent was a part of many popular songs such as: “Range Rover” “DIl Vaarda” “Aish” and many more. Find out what he had to say in his exclusive interview with Desi Today.

Could you explain exactly what a music producer/composer does?

A music producer/composer basically has the most important job to create a song. Without them a song can’t really see the light of day. These days the word “producer” is thrown around loosely, but a real music producer is the one creating the song from scratch. They are the one composing the music/melody, arranging everything, recording the vocalist for the track etc. If you listen to a song without vocals, everything you hear in that track is created by the music producer.

HARJ NAGRA: LOCAL MUSIC PRODUCER WITH INTERNATIONAL FAME

By Parveen Sohal

What made you get into the music industry? Is it something you already dreamt of doing or did the idea come later in your life?

I’ve always had an interest in music from a young age. Growing up, I’ve been fortunate to be surrounded by big name artists in the punjabi industry such as Sukshinder Shinda, Jazzy B etc. I’ve been able to learn a lot from these guys and they are always there giving me advice.

I started producing music when I was 16 as a hobby and learnt everything I could by myself. Everyday after school I would

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So far it has to be Sukshinder Shinda, because growing up as a kid he would take me to the studio with him whenever I’m in england and I would just watch him work. Then few years later I’m able to say I have done tracks with him and we are continuing to work together which has been an amazing feeling that not many people can say.

In your opinion who are the top 3 people in music right now and why?

I would have to say the top 3 people in the industry right now (In no order) Jazzy B, Diljit & Dr.Zeus. If you turn on the radio or are at a wedding, party, etc.

You would definitely be hearing their songs playing many times.

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What are some challenges you’ve had to overcome in the industry?

Being one of the younger artists in the industry I have faced many challenges throughout my music career. As people or even other artists didn’t take me serious at first or questioned my credibility or what I bring to the table. However I never let that affect me and continued with proving people wrong with my work. I try to express myself in any possible way I can creatively, whether it be in music or acting.

Do you have any messages you would like to give to our readers (especially those who want to pursue a career in the music industry)?

Yes: don’t be discouraged by any challenges that you may face in anything you do or people telling you no. If you are passionate about something, pursue it. However you have to put in the work.

Nothing happens overnight. www.desitoday.ca

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FEATURE

By Parveen Sohal

SAAV: Young South Asians Bettering The Community South Asian Alliance Vancouver (SAAV) is a not-for-profit foundation made up of current and graduated post-secondary students who share the same simple passion: giving back to the community. The group has been a part of a number of food and clothing drives, fundraisers to aid the underprivileged, anti-bullying campaigns, educational information sessions, tree

planting events, and much more. SAAV is ultimately a platform for youth to band together to work toward the betterment of the South Asian community and of society at large.

SAAV recognizes the seven South Asian countries in the world and its members act as a group (or an “alliance” if you will) to represent the community in the most positive

SAAV Food Drive Once a month, a company sponsor covers the cost of groceries for members to make sandwiches to deliver to the homeless in the downtown eastside.

and progressive manner possible.

SAAV has been able to make these positive strides thanks to the help of its’ generous sponsors/partners including: Decibel Entertainment, Just Cakes BC, Pink Orchid Studio, Deo Studios, Precious Moments Decor and Always & Forever Wedding Planners, MannKind Charitable Society and others.

SAAV Tree Planting SAAV partnered with Mannkind to plant trees throughout Langley to promote environmental progression.

SAAV University Information Session

SAAV Clothing Drive SAAV partnered with SOAR Philanthropic Society to collect warm clothes and blankets to benefit the underprivileged in the Downtown Eastside.

SAAV hosts information sessions where members share their post-secondary experiences to high school students and students are able ask questions to SAAV members who are in faculties or programs they wish to pursue.

Ever want to give back but not sure how? Contact saavbc.org@gmail.com to become a member or sponsor. Become a part of the movement. Become part of the alliance.

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FEATURE Compiled By Parveen Sohal

THINGS I WISH I KNEW IN MY 20’S Your 20’s will shape up to be some of your most magical, confusing, eye-opening and exilerating years of your life. More often than not, it is when you enter your 30’s, 40’s and even 50’s, that you realize how precious those 10 years really were. What we’ve done for you is sifted through dozens of Desi Today readers’ advice pieces about what they wish they knew when they were 20. For everyone entering the decade: sit back and let the adice sink in; for everyone who passed the decade many years ago: decide which pieces you agree most with and let the reminiscing begin!

YOU’RE NOT OLD When I hear my neices call themselves “old” I want to use my old lady baylunah to set them straight! You have four entire decades (40 years) before you even have to retire! In my day I thought being 20 meant I was an adult and it was the end of my youthful days but I was so wrong. Being a twenty-something year old with a college degree will make you one of the youngest people at any workplace. You’re at the very beginning of your career, you’re starting to build more serious relationships, your opportunities are endless. In your twneties you are a BABY. Appreciate it. Enjoy it.

Understanding this will make your 20’s so much better.

- Kiran, 42 years old

THE WORST THING THAT CAN HAPPEN IS YOUR TWENTIES BEING EASY I wish someone had told me in my twenties that the decade is meant to be difficult— and if it’s not, you’re going to be a crappy adult. If my dreams had worked out as seamlessly as I wanted, I would not have built the character, backbone , work ethic or strong skills set that I gained by my thirties which is essential for the rest of my life.

I was forced to use my twenties to work harder, study longer, grind farther, struggle, strategize and grow as a person. It feels terrible at times but it’s supposed to. Those terrible kid years are the reason I am such a successful adult today. Remind yourself that your struggle is normal—necessary even.

- Hardeep, 34 years old

THIS IS THE BEST YOU’LL EVER LOOK

MOVE OUT OF THE HOUSE FOR SCHOOL

Enjoy it.

It’s pretty much set in stone for every Indian household that the kids live with their parents and then get married and live with their in-laws (or your own parents or just with your spouse). The only time you get to truly be on your own is if you move away for university in your twnties. I did this and it was one the best decisions of my life thus far. Getting to live on my own and with roommates really allowed me to find my own and build myself as a person—and it was really fun! Waking up and hanging out with my girls all day long are the days I’ll never forget. When I talk to my friends who stayed at home for school, they say it was their biggest regret so don’t make the same mistake. Being Indian, let’s be honest, you will never get the opportunity again other than moving away for school. Do it and I promise you’ll thank yourself later.

- Karn, 38 years old

DON’T SUBSCRIBE TO “AGE MILESTONES” Everyone goes down their own path, so don’t get caught up in achieving certain goals based on an arbitrary age. I used to tell myself “be married by 25” “have your dream job at 27 or you’re screwed” “have kids before 29 otherwise you’re failing at life.” And it’s ridiculous. I honestly believe that thinking this way can ruin your twenties. Sometimes I made myself miserable because I didn’t think I was doing my 20’s “right.” You don’t “have” to do anything at any certain age. You’re setting yourself up for disaster if you do this. Instead, focus on being happier, focus on being a better you each day. All of your “life milestones” will happen naturally so don’t give yourself a deadline and definitely don’t think of yourself as a failure if something isn’t done by a certain age.

A quote I always follow is “The less you worry about when something will happen, the more likely it is that you’ll learn more from the process of making it happen when it’s right for you. People are going to get engaged, earn promotions, buy houses, have kids, and sometimes these things will happen before you; other times you’ll be the first in your group to do something. So just do you, and be you, because there’s no “right” time to do something except when it feels right to you. Life really does have a way of falling into place that gets clearer and more meaningful the older you get. Don’t worry about what you’re going to do with the rest of your life. You will figure it out day by day, year by year.

Enjoy the journey and trust yourself.”

- Hanna 32 years old

- Jas, 31 years old

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YOU’RE GOING TO SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF OFTEN—DON’T For whatever reason, it’s in your twenties that you let all the little issues in life really get to you and we really have to train ourselves to stop. As long as you haven’t burned down your office or committed a million dollar tax fraud, you’re fine. You’re good. Life is good. In your thirties everyone really mellows out and wishes they could go back in their twenties and not let the small stuff bother them or ruin their day. Let yourself enjoy your twenties because everything is okay. Tell this to all your friends and yourself. You’re doing great, just relax and enjoy the ride.

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FIND HUMOR IN EVERYTHING If people looked at life seriously all the time then everyone would be severely depressed. Find humor in all the horrible things around you. It’s the only way you’ll survive.

- Gary, 46 years old

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Go, right now! I promise in your 30’s and 40’s you’ll understand why.

- Sandy, 39 years old

YOUR 20’S ARE YOUR TIME TO BE LOST Don’t buy into all those songs and movies that depict yout 20s as the “greatest” times of your life. Honestly, your 20s can be miserable at times and that’s okay. You probably don’t have it together—probably not even close and that’s okay too because these are the years to be lost.

- Raj 34 years old.

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FEATURE BE NICER TO YOURSELF

BE PATIENT WITH YOUR CAREER

People seem to be harshest on themselves when they’re young which is ironic because when you’re old, all you’ll do is wish you could be young again. So Stop. Treat yourself like you would your best friend. One of the best pieces of advice I ever got in my twenties when I was upset with myself was “treat yourself like you would your daughter if she was in this situation.”

By the time you reach age 35, you’ll still have 30 more working years ahead of you, so it’s not the end of the world if you’re not the CEO by age 25.

Jessica, 32 years old

COMPARISON IS THE DEATH OF HAPPINESS In this day and age with social media being such a big part of our lives, it’s frightenly easy to compare our lives to others. We tend to spend a good portion of our day scrolling through feeds that fill our heads with what other people have done and achieved. The easiest way to ruin your twenties is by allowing yourself to compare your life and milestones to someone else’s.

We have our individual opportunities, skills sets and paths in life. I know it’s cliché but only compare yourself to the person you were yesterday.

Train your brain to not pay attention to what people are doing in relation to you. Your twenties are the time when two seemingly “similar” people can be at complete different times in their life: one could be expecting heir second child, while the other is still waiting for the second promotion at an entry level job. Remember that this is completely normal. Use your twenties to explore, experiement and build yourself for yourself.

Jessica, 33 years old

LEARN TO ENJOY YOUR OWN COMPANY There will be times in your life when you really want to go to that concert, check out the new bookstore or go on a getaway trip and your friends may not want to or have the time to. But that doesn’t mean you can’t go alone!

In your 20’s try to build a retionship with yourself and become comfortable hanging out with yourself.

Amy, 33 years old

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FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

Harjot, 38 years old

THERE WILL BE MANY TWISTS AND TURNS BUT ALWAYS ASK YOURSELF “WHAT DID I LEARN HERE?” You’re going to make a ton of mistakes but think of every “failure” as a life lesson. Every bad event, as terrible as it may seem, will build you in a positive way—if you let it. After every mistake think “okay, what can I learn from this?” It sounds cliché and dumb but do it everytime you run into a sticky situation. It will make all the difference.

Pam, 43 years old

WHEN YOU GET INTO A FIGHT, ASK “WHAT DID I DO?”

WATCH THE MOVIE “INSIDE OUT/YOU PRETTY MUCH DICTACTE YOUR ENTIRE LIFE Because you control your mind, your outlook on life and your reaction to whatever life throws your way, you essentially dictate your happiness and if you have a “good” life. In your twenties it’s easy to think the world is so out of your control and you’ll only be happy if you get X and Y and it wil be terrible when Z happens. In reality, to quote a very cliché line “the happiest people don’t have everything, they make the best out of what they have.” I wish I knew in my twenties that you honesty have to train your brain to understand that you can react to situations in a way to make yourself feel good OR bad. And this is what determines if you are a happy twenty year old: not what happens to you, but how you react to what happens to you and what your attitude is. My entire life changed after watching “Inside Out” and I came to understand how the inside of my head truly works. Watch the movie.

Understand this ideology.

This one will easily be the hardest one on the list. When I was younger and would get into disagreements with someone, I was always jump straight to “I can’t believe they would say that to me! They are terrible! I’m right because X, Y, and Z! I didn’t even do anything!”But in my 30’s I learned that, yes, some people are just jerks, but for the most part, the majorty of people aren’t. Maybe you’re accidentally pushing a person’s buttoms. Take a moment to think about where the conversation changed and why someone is reacting to you in an extreme or aggressive way. Take responsibility for your role the agreement because chances are it’s more of a 50/50 on the blame chart.

Yes, there will be times when you truly didn’t do anything but those moments are very rare. Most times, if you really re-play your disagreement in your head and pretend you are your adversary, chances are you’d probably react aggressively too.

You have the rest of your life to lounge around and watch television shows.

Fill your 20s with memories from your own life, not your favourite show’s.

When I think back to the latter end of my 20’s, I filled them up with Law and Order, Friends, Prison Break and House. These are fantastic shows, don’t get me wrong, but your 20’s are when you have the most energy so go out and make the most of it! Use your 40’s to sit around watching shows.

Hanisha, 32 years old

Belina, 31 years old

Ruvneet, 32 years old

TURN OFF THE NETFLIX.

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF Wash off your makeup, put on sunscreen, work out, eat right. Your 30 year old self will thank you.

Jasmine, 37 years old

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BE DUMB SOMETIMES Do it. Do it on purpose even. There is no other point in your life where you can and be dumb and be able to get away with it. When you’re 50 years old, it’s those memories that will keep you going.

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Harry, 35 years old

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YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE MARRIED IN YOUR EARLY TWENTIES This is something that is specific to our South Asian community. We have it engraved into our heads that we “have” to be married at a young age otherwise our entire worlds will collapse. I wish I knew in my twenties that not being married at age 25 could be the best possible decision for me.

If I could give one piece of advice for twenty year olds, it’s that this decade is the one where you will change the most as a person. Because of this, someone you have been dating for years and used to be compatible with, may turn out to be completely different when you turn 27 or 28. Some people grow in different directions and become completely differnet from when they first fell in love. What comes difficult is, is that you may think you “love” this new person and of course you will feel attached to them but that doesn’t mean you’re in love with who they become. It’s the couples that got married quite young in their twenties who are now thirty that: fight all the time, are distant from one another and are just simply unhappy. I noticed that it’s those couples that met later in life (after they’ve done changing a lot as a person) who get married later that end up being happier because they are with a person they are truly compatible with (not someone they’ve grown to be attached to from dating for so long during their adolesnt years). For some couples it works, but for a lot it’s the perfect recipie for a terrible marriage. So if you’re not married at 25 or 26 or maybe aren’t in a serious relationship yet, don’t worry! It may be the best decision possible.

Amrita, 33 years old

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17

FEATURE “I wanted to play for the home team, “ Jas Dhillon exclaims. “I wanted to be a homegrown kid who gets my represent my community.” The 26-year-old UBC graduate was born and raised in Surrey, BC and is living out his dream as offensive linesmen for the BC Lions. The journey getting there was not an easy one. Jas began perfecting his craft almost two decades ago and has since put fourth countless hours of gruelling practise and intense training to lead him to his position today.

The 6 foot, broad-shouldered football powerhouse defies all stereotypes of the “typical” professional athlete. He is smart.

He is humble. He is incredibly kindhearted.

What’s the worst part of his job? How did his upbringing affect where he is today? What are his views on performance enhancing drugs? Find out in Jas Dhillon’s exclusive interview with Desi Today where he unveils the secrets behind the helmet.

Hometown Hero Jas Dhillon PLAYING FOR BC LIONS

By Parveen Sohal

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FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

www.desitoday.ca

Does it feel any different playing for your hometown rather than Toronto?

Without a doubt, Toronto gave me the opportunity to become a professional athlete. They saw something in me that I didn’t realize I had in myself until very recently. For that, I am forever grateful.

I am grateful to Toronto and the entire organization of the Argonauts for giving me the opportunity to live my dream.

But make no mistake about it, I wanted to be a BC Lions player. I wanted to play for the home team. I wanted to be in the position I am now, where I get to be a homegrown kid that gets to represent my community. It’s huge. There are so many people I grew up playing with that I now see rooting for me and it’s amazing.

The support structure, the overall atmosphere, it’s much more fitting for me.

What’s the best and worst part of being a professional athlete?

The best part would be being able to represent the Indo-Canadian community and overall being one of the few IndoCanadians at the forefront of sports.

It’s amazing. The worst part, which sort of goes hand in hand, is the pressures and expectations that come along the way. I’m in no way stepping onto the field to play for anyone but myself and sometimes that’s hard for people to understand that. I love to represent my community but at the end of the day I’m not doing this for anyone but myself. But for the most part, being able to play football professionally is probably the biggest blessing of my life.

What’s your favourite position to play and why?

Growing up, I always played defensive end and defensive tackle. This means that my primary job was to pretty much stop the run and sac the quarterback.

That position came with a lot of limelight and it came with a lot of accolade.

You get noticed more because you have a statistic that people are following.

As an offensive lineman, your sole job is to protect the quarterback and to create paths for the run. We really don’t have measurable statistics that we get rated by. The other thing about being an offensive lineman is that it’s a super cerebral position: you have to know each play inside and out and be able to adapt on the fly to things you may have never www.desitoday.ca

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FEATURE You really need to be prepared about what happens next and if you’re an athlete that gets busted, you have to be ready to suffer the consequences. If you get busted in the CIS, you’re banned for 5 years. You wouldn’t be able to play college football after that. At UBC we were so restricted that we couldn’t take certain cough medicines--we couldn’t take Nyquil or Advil Cold & Sinus because they had certain ingredients that were restricted. All in all, you have to be careful about what you put into your body and what the outcomes will ultimately be.

seen before. In that sense, I liked being an offensive lineman because you have to be really quick on your feet and really understand the game.

In comparison, being a defensive lineman was really fun, too, because you basically pin your ears back and get after the quarterback as fast as you can. So both really have their pros and cons.

There seems to be a trend toward athletes turning to steroids for performance enhancement. What are your thoughts?

Performance enhancement is a really sticky subject because there are so many varying schools of thought on it. If you look at sports as a whole and if you look at the evolution of sport itself, you can see that athletes in general are held to a higher regard now than ever before.

They’re expected to put out higher numbers as well. So if you think about it in that sense, I can see where the pressures on an athlete would start to transpire and where they would think, “okay, if I take these performance enhancers, I’ll be able to produce those numbers and be part of the norm.” However, do performance enhancers have a place in sports? I don’t think so.

As soon as you make the playing fields unequal, there’s no fairness left. I mean, I personally wouldn’t care if an athlete is putting steroids into their bodies, it’s definitely something I think that needs to be thoroughly researched because you are putting a foreign substance into your body.

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FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

You’ve played countless football games in your career thus far, what has been your proudest win?

You know, that’s really hard to say.

There are lots of games that I’ve played in that were very high stakes and they went 50/50: sometimes we won and sometimes we lost. One thing I was always proud of was the players I was playing beside. I loved my time at UBC and I still sit back and think about my times there and I still talk to my friends who play at UBC today. Being around those types of guys and being immersed in that environment, those are moments I’m never going to get back. I can’t pinpoint one specific game, but my proudest season was my season at UBC. How has being Indo-Canadian shaped your career?

One thing about being an Indo-Canadian, especially a male born in central Surrey is that there are so many things going against you: you’re going to be stereotyped, you’re going to be expected to get into the gang life, or become a pothead, or just to do something stupid. There were all these negative associations

with being an Indo-Canadian male.

So, for me growing up, it was always at the forefront of my mind to break that stereotype. In high school I kind of walked to the beat of my own drum and never really did anything to conform to what was socially accepted at that time.

There’s a reason I transferred out of Princess Margaret Secondary and went to Sands Secondary. It wasn’t because I was kicked out or even because I was hanging out with the wrong crowd, I really wanted to make a strong statement about what I was doing and how I was serious about playing.

Being an Indo-Canadian has also given me the responsibility to uphold my family’s name, my name and even the name of our people. There aren’t very many Indo-Canadians playing sports professionally right now so the responsibility is always tenfold for us. I do try to analyze and critique everything I do before I do it because, ultimately, I want to be the best role model out there. I want kids to be like, “Hey, that guy could do it, so I can too.”

I want kids to believe that it’s very possible to be a professional athlete.

I truly believe that if I can get to this point, that there is potential for youths to follow and do the same. I think over time we’ll see a wave of Indo-Canadians coming into sports and I think what we were initially lacking was some sort of a role model to emulate and to make us understand that it’s possible.

Is there any other sort of message you would like to give to our readers?

For all the youth, I just want to say that it doesn’t matter what sport you’re playing or what you’re doing as long as your heart is in it. My only message is that you have to do whatever it is you have to do to be the best at your sport of craft. Whatever it may take: hiring a trainer, working on your diet, whatever you need to reach your goal, put in the hours to get there. Make your dreams a goal and put your all into making your dream a reality.

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FEATURE

Facebook: Neither Good Nor Evil Social media has become a hot topic in recent years. When it was first unveiled, Myspace and later Facebook were hailed as innovative. People flocked to join and become apart of this new trend. Recently these social media sites have been blamed for suicides caused by bullying among adolescents, as well a tendency for people to actually become less social. There is a new movement of people who are “deleting” their Facebooks and unplugging from social media. Facebook has become a dirty word associated with inflated egos, “selfies” and superficiality.

I agree that social media platforms have attracted a certain type of attention seeking individual who feeds on praises from “friends”. It has brought about an obsession for sharing every detail of individual lives.

The need to keep up with their friends and to shape their family photos into perfection!

To be more interesting, thinner, and happier than everyone else on their friends list.

I believe that social media is simply a stage! On that stage you can build anything you want. Some people choose to make it all about them and post “selfies” and pictures of their vacations or new car purchases. Others use that stage to discuss political issues

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FEB OCT // MAR NOV 2016 2015 News With A DEsi View

that are important to them. I use my stage to share my family’s life with those that I love and care about.

I have three sisters and four brothers. I also have have 11 nieces and 1 nephew and another niece on the way! My husband is from India, where his mom and two sisters and a niece and nephew still live. We both went to college in Southern California and now live in Northern California. I have traveled to South America. In short, Facebook is where I keep in contact with all of my family and friends.

To be honest it hurts me deeply that I can not be with my nieces and nephews as they grow up. I have always wanted a close family, but for varies reasons we are scattered around the world. It fills me with so much happiness to see their pictures, videos, and milestones on my Facebook feed. This may sound corny but I feel as if I am there with them as they grow up. On the occasions I do get to see them in person I feel like I have not missed any time with them. I do not feel like a stranger. I feel that I know them and their interests and personality. I have seen them play sports, dance, sing. I have seen their videos and I have watched them blossom. I have seen friends wedding photos

By Tina Goulart-Rallhan

and births and graduations. I have laughed at jokes and video and cried and connected with people over tragedies.

I can send out emails to all these people in my life, but Facebook just makes it easier.

I can post a picture of my daughter at ballet, and now my mom and siblings and family all can see this important event in my daughter’s life. I am not ashamed to say that Facebook keeps me connected.

Social Media has allowed me to make new connections as well. To make new friends. I mean to use the word friends, not just the people on my facebook account, but real friend I actually care about and who care about me. Specifically Facebook has allowed me to meet other “Masala Couples”.

When I first met and then married my husband I did not know any other mixed Indian couples. I had questions and concerns. We Masala couples face unique issues that only other Masala couples would understand.

Since starting my group for mixed Indian couples on Facebook I have made so many friends. We have all connected and bonded over shared experiences.

The problem comes when people judge their self worth by how many likes they get on their photos, or by comparing their lives

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to others. In the past our life events were not judged and evaluated so easily by others. Facebook has made our lives more public.

I have fallen pray to comparing my life with others, and feeling inadequate. I see a friend’s new house, vacation, or career. I feel my own self esteem sink. For a moment I feel like failure in comparison. The reality is that Facebook is a stage and we control what we put on it. We do not know all the details of that person’s life.

My favorite quote expresses my feelings pretty well on this issue: “Life is a Journey, not a destination.” by Ralph Waldo Emerson I have to remind myself of this often.

Everyone takes a different route in life.

There is no meter of success! No scale, no bench mark! It is all relative!

I have had people tell me that I am such a wonderful mom because I do so many activities with my daughter. I have heard people say they feel inadequate in comparison because they do not have the time to do those activities with their children. It was never my intention to have that effect on other people. No one sees the tantrums my daughter goes through. No one sees the doubts that I have as a mother or my feelings of inadequacy. I don’t share all those things daily on social media. Sometimes I share issues I am having with my daughter because I believe in reaching out for support.

Social media is a communication tool, like a phone, letter, or email!

Gossip, bullying and judgment has been around since the dawn of time. I bet the cavemen even criticized each other. You know they probably competed for best cave paintings!

Forget about blaming social media! It’s like blaming a piece of paper because a mean letter was written on it! Let’s instead realize that social media is just a tool for communication. Let’s teach our children that happiness is more than things that money can buy. That popularity is fleeting and human kindness is more important. That no one is perfect, and that we should embrace the journey and not just the destination.

Facebook has connected me with my loved ones and allowed me to be apart of their lives even though we are thousands of miles apart. It is a tool that I control, and is nothing more then that. Deleting Facebook is like destroying my mailbox for its potential to bring bad news. It does not make sense, and has more to do with the individual than the site.

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23

FEATURE

By Parveen Sohal

s d r o W e h T g n i c ” a l u p o e Y R k n a How h T “ h t i w ” y r r o e f i S L r m u o Y “I’ e g n a Can Ch Imagine two people arriving late for an appointment. One says, “Sorry I’m late,” while the other says “Thank you for your patience.” How do you respond?

How is it different?

Apologizing to someone shows your humility while thanking someone shows your appreciation. You could be put in the exact same situation and choose one of these two routes to take. Yao Xiao’s cartoons show that people tend to be overly apologetic when they really mean to be thankful instead.

“A few friends of mine would always say ‘thank you for hanging out with me’ and I couldn’t figure out why it was so nice to hear it,” Yao explains. The act of thanking something uplifts the person doing the thanking as well as the person being thanked. In comparison, the act of apologizing simply puts the apologizer in an inferior position. An outcome neither person really wants.

Yao highlights that there are of course times when saying “I’m sorry” is necessary but she shows how more often than not people will apologize when they mean to thank a person. And it makes the biggest difference.

Understanding this can have many positive benefits in your work and professional life. A hospitality clerk explains that when dealing with difficult customers she was taught to replace “Sorry that your cabinet is broken” with “Thank you for recognizing that the cabinet is broken and taking the time to let us know. We will fix it right away.” She explains that when you say “sorry” it only fuels a difficult customer’s anger and makes them want to complain to her more. In comparison, thanking them forces them to still keep you in a high regard while still validating their negative experience.

We are not saying for you to tell your spouse “thank you for recognizing that I’m cheating” by any means but we do agree with Yao that people apologize for things they shouldn’t. Apologize when you hurt someone, otherwise thank them instead.

You’ll feel better and they will too.

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FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

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25

FEATURE

E

ight months ago, Jasdeep Sra laid in a hospital bed fighting for his life a er suffering an unexpected brutal a ack. Eight months ago, Jasdeep aimed to return to his 9 to 5 labour job to continue supporting his single mother and younger brother. “It was the lowest point in my life,” Jasdeep comments. The young man with everything going against him had one unlikely talent on his side: a passion for cooking.

Today the 19-year-old Surrey resident, Jasdeep Sra, is the youngest contestant on the biggest Canadian cooking show on television, “MasterChef Canada”. He made the top 40 cut with his audition dishes: Tandoori Salmon Steak and Shrimp with Bu er Chicken Gravy. An unlikely choice, fi ing for the young man who is anything but ordinary.

Jasdeep’s talent and passion for cooking can only ever be outweighed by the love and compassion he has for his mother and young brother.

“For me, success will be when my mother, who works 3 minimum wage jobs to support us, can sit down and not ever have to li a single finger. For me, success will be watching my brother grow up playing sports and going to school like any kid his age and not have to worry about some of the things I did.”

Jasdeep comments.

“Cooking is my passion and anyone that knows me knows I will stop at nothing to get to where I want to be. I’ll put in the work, I’ll put in the hours, I’ll my whole heart into it. I’ll stop at nothing to be the very best.”

MasterChef Canada premieres on February 14 on CTV with Jasdeep Sra and 39 other finalists from all across the country. Watch as the young Surrey man represents the South Asian community in a ba le of culinary greatness.

Who was the one who encouraged him to apply for the show? How have his friends and family responded to him being on national television? What’s his take on cooking being a “feminine” trait in our community?

Find out all of this and more with Desi Today’s exclusive interview with the up-and-coming national cooking star.

Give us a li le bit of background information about yourself I have a younger brother who is 10-years-old and a single mom at home.

Growing up, because I had a single mom, we had to do a lot of things for ourselves like cooking. Having to take on that kind of responsibility is part of the reason I am where I am today.

Also, ever since I can remember I’ve always been a really competitive kid. Whether it was sports or anything else, I was al-

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FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

ways into competition so doing something like cooking to compete was a good fit for me in that sense. But I was dealing with a lot growing up and trying to get in my 9 to 5 job to pull my weight at home so the whole cooking as a career thing wasn’t really ever at the forefront of my mind.

I originally went to school for carpentry but decided it wasn’t really for me.

Then went back to school to do paramedicine and I’m a licensed Emergency Medical Responder. To be honest, cooking was always where my heart was at but doing it as

a career never seemed like a possibility for me growing up.

What ultimately lead you to apply to be on MasterChef Canada?

In May of last year I was involved in an incident that left me with six stab wounds and I was told I might not survive. I remember laying in the hospital bed looking

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MasterChef Canada’s Youngest Contestant

SURREY’S JASDEEP SRA www.desitoday.ca

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

27

DESI TODAY EXCLUSIVE

By Parveen Sohal

FEATURE and flavours.

When I make something, I have a general template of ingredients but the magic happens when I taste it and know I have to add something or if there’s something missing. Through learning, I have a pretty good handle on flavours that go well with each other or how to counteract something that’s too spicy or too sweet. Or, for example, if something is too garlic-y, it will need honey because garlic and honey are like ying and yang! Small stuff like that you pick up on and after experimenting so many times I learned a lot of different tips and tricks for flavours.

How old you were you when started cooking?

outside and it’s really moments like those that you just think “I want to go home.”

You know what I mean? You think, “I want to go home. I won’t let this stop me. I want to be more than this.”

Again, my mom was a single mother and she worked her entire life to support my brother and I, and I just thought, “this is how I’m repaying her?” And this goes for a lot of South Asian youth who are on the wrong path. You know, many of our parents came from India and worked tirelessly in labour jobs, or worked three jobs on a single income like my mother, to provide a better life for us.

It was at that time, when I was at the lowest moment of my life that my girlfriend said “you’re injured, you’re not working, you’re not going to school, you’re not really doing anything with your life, you should do something.” She told me she saw a commercial about applying to MasterChef Canada and told me I should apply.

And, of course, my first instinct was “Me? Do you think I could really do something like that?” And she said, “You’re always cooking and everything you make is so good, so why not?”

So she’s the one who ultimately encouraged me to apply. So I applied and did the audition. Next thing I know I’m on a flight to Toronto for taping.

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FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

Where did you learn how to cook?

I never went to school for cooking. It all sort of came from watching my family and experimenting with whatever I saw in front of me. You know, you’d see your dad making “bakhra” (goat) on the weekends and you would sort of watch and take it in.

When I’d go to restaurants I’d paid attention to the tastes and the flavors of what was in front of me. I was always really interested in the cooking process.

My “mamma” (uncle) was also a huge cooking guy and anything he would get to cook, he would want to change it up.

Whether it be regular Tandoori chicken, he wanted to make it different: to add spices, to keep the fat in the pan to cook it tender rather than crispy, just anything to make it different. I have the same cooking style today. I sort of learned by trial and error and have been always been into the experimenting aspect of the whole thing.

I remember being very young and like every other kid, I made Maggie noodles.

But it wasn’t that you could just throw them into the pot. I remember trying to add different spices, or cheese, or anything to get the taste I wanted at that time. I’ve just always loved mixing things together and experimenting with different sauces

I have one vivid memory of when I was about eleven or twelve years old and I wanted to eat “Gol Gappay” and my mom said “Okay, I’ll go get some from the store.”

But I told my mom I didn’t want the store bought ones. I didn’t love the taste of the store ones and they were always too crunchy and they were always so small!

I was being a little stubborn and she was kind of like, “What do you want me to do?”

So what I did was, I took a computer, I looked up the recipe and I made the biggest Gol Gappa you’ll ever see! (laughs) My mom walks in and said, “What are you doing? How did you do this?” And I stood there at eleven or twelve years old, looking at the recipe, of course changing a bunch of things, and make some delicious Gol Gappay. For whatever reason, I’ll never forget that day.

To answer your question, I’ve been experimenting with different tastes and flavours ever since I can remember. But I guess I never really classified myself as a “cook” until much later.

How did you come up with your signature dish?

In our culture, it’s renowned that our main thing is: tandoori and butter chicken.

But I realized that no one has ever mixed the two and I wanted to try something different.

I have another vivid memory of one time that my mamma made salmon steaks.

I remember he carefully made them and pan-seared them and we had them so delicately. I have that memory in the back of my head and I still remember that day: sitting on the kitchen table and looking at this beautiful piece of food. It’s something that just sparked with me. So that’s why I came up with the salmon steak part.

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The Tandoor part? Well I’ll make Tandoori anything! (laughs). And shrimp goes so well with salmon so that’s where that came in. The butter chicken sauce was sort of like the clam chowder: the butter type feel to soften everything up. So butter chicken is made with whipping cream and I am a strong believer in having a base with a kick. So a base would be any dairy product whether it be sour cream, mayonnaise, whipping cream, anything. The kick would be anything with spices so for me the butter chicken sauce was the base and the Tandoori part with the masala was the kick.

I actually decided that part first earlier and all I needed to do was decide on the meat. That’s where my mamma’s salmon steak inspiration came in. And it turned out amazing. I mean it: the sauce, the salmon, the way I cook it, it’s delicious. I want everyone to try it. I’m very proud of it.

In your opinion, what is the most enjoyable part of cooking?

I don’t want follow the book. That’s why I would probably hate about working at a restaurant. I don’t like following a recipe. I want to make my own rules. I am a strong believer that “It takes a good chef to get the exact measurements but it takes a great chef to not look at the measurements once.”

That’s the way I’ve always sort of lived: living by my own rules. That’s the way cooking especially has always been for me.

When people eat my cooking I want the flavours to come out by my hands. Some of the things I mix together, people think I’m crazy but I can guarantee it will be delicious!

Who is your biggest role model and why?

For most young boys, your dad will likely be your role model. My dad wasn’t around to raise me so the whole “role model” thing is tricky for me. My dad and I don’t have a bad relationship now but I can’t really say he was any type of role model for me growing up.

I guess my “cooking role model” would be my mamma. He never really sat me down to teach me the skills but I watched him a lot and just absorbed everything he did. He was playful with his cooking and tried different things which definitely encouraged me to do the same.

To answer your question, the whole idea of me having a role model to look up to just makes me want to be the best possible role model for my brother. I did get into

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a really bad situation when I was younger and I didn’t mean for it to happen but I still took ownership of it. And I’m glad that my brother could see me go from my lowest lows and now see me at my highest highs.

Even though that experience almost killed me, it’s probably one of the most rewarding experiences because I learned so much from it. Today, I just want to set the best possible example for my brother and give him everything I possibly can.

How has your family shaped who you are today?

One of the biggest things that has shaped me as a person is seeing my mom’s struggle. My family is my mother and my brother. My dad was never really there and everyone kind of left us out to dry. My mom is hands down one of the hardest working people I know. She grinds away at three jobs working minimum wage. I know her potential is so much higher than that but the stress of the single mom life can really take a toll on a person.

I want to work hard to make sure that one day my mom won’t have to lift a finger. I want to work hard to be successful for her. I want to get us out of the basement we’re in an into a house. I want my mom to get to relax and I want to pay for my brother’s school.

That will be the definition of success to me.

Look at Surrey: it’s definitely not the poorest city by any means but look at all the crime and the kids who are committing them. Punjabis, they work hard and these kids have castles built around them.

But still they take it for granted. Still, they go down the wrong path.

I want to be a role model for these kids. Whether you have everything or nothing. Especially to those kids who have nothing: I want to say that there is something out there for you. Whether it be work or something else, each person has a passion and you just have to go out

and find what that passion is. You can’t be afraid to take risk and you can’t be afraid to grind for it. I mean, look 70% of the world hates their jobs and dreads waking up to go to their jobs. I was no different, but if you take those risks and put in those hours, there will be a brighter day.

What do you think sets you apart from the other contestants on MasterChef Canada?

Well, first and foremost, I have my East Indian blood! When some of the other contestants looked at me, I know a part of them was like, “Look at him, he must know his spices!” (laughs). And another thing is that I’m the youngest. And being the youngest some of the others might consider me the underdog. You know what, I might not have the experience but I have the heart and the drive. And you better believe, being the youngest, I’ll be faster than the rest of them! (laughs).

So, the ethnicity, the age and just what I’ve seen in life is what makes me different.

I know everyone has their own emotional road for life and what shape them.

But what I’m fighting for is totally different: I’m fighting for my mom, I’m fighting for my brother. What I saw eight months ago

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

29

FEATURE and compared to where I am now, that’s what sets me apart.

How does it feel being the youngest on the show?

It’s a bit intimidating thinking that people on the show are double my age but I am ultimately just proud of myself.

It’s like “Woah, I’m doing this at my age.”

I’m competing on MasterChef Canada at 19-years-old so this just tells me where to set the bar ten years from now.

How does it feel representing the South Asian community on a national show?

It feels amazing because the amount of support you’ll get from the Punjabi community is next level. In our community, they want to see a young kid from Surrey succeeding and will celebrate it as if it’s their own son out there. That’s what makes it special. It’s the love you get from our people.

Cooking is an “unconventional” career to many people especially in the South Asian community. What made you pursue it even though it is unconventional?

That’s what got me into carpentry. No one ever really said, “You know, follow your dreams, you can have the career that you want.” So I went for the practical choice.

Mostly being from the Indo Canadian community you’re told: be a doctor, lawyer or engineer. Never a chef. They’d probably pick carpenter over a chef (laughs). It isn’t a career I was going to follow, it was a really my faith in god and me having the blessing that is my girlfriend kind of brought me here.

Cooking is mostly thought of as a “feminine” trait within the South Asian community. What are your thoughts?

It’s a stereotype that needs to break. We can all cook: men can cook,

30

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

women can cook. Some of the best chefs in the world are men. Anything we do in life, we can do both. I was in construction and carpentry and there was a woman in my class. It can go both ways.

It’s extra shameful that in the South Asian community, it’s typically the man that can do anything and women who are suppressed. That’s wrong. You hear about women committing suicide or parents aborting their unborn daughters. It’s just wrong. These are big issues in the world and I’m glad we live in country where women can become whatever they want to.

Culinary-wise, men shouldn’t be afraid to cook. The food’s going in your stomach! (laughs). And who knows, it might be your next thing. It was for me.

Do you have any advice for our readers?

With the

younger kids,

there’s so much crime going on and it’s like “you’re a kid, what are you fighting for?”

Fighting for what: for drugs, for “turf”?

Why are you even doing this? What’s it all for.

And it’s just sad because your parents have a life set up in front of you. It’s just a question about whether you want to take it. If you go up to your dad tomorrow and say “I want to go to school” a hundred bucks says he’ll say “Okay, I’ll put you through school.” If my mom working minimum wage at three jobs and says “I’ll put you through school” your parents will too.

My advice would just be to follow your dreams. People do the typical 9 to 5 and that was the path I assumed I had to take but you don’t. 90% of us are in our comfort zone where we got a job, stick to do it, and never tried anything bigger. Give yourself the opportunity. You think you’re good at something? Try it. Why not just try?

What do you have to lose? What, you’ll take a week off work, go to school for a little bit, why not? See if you like it, see if it’s everything you’ve ever wanted. Life is way too short. If you’re here reading this right now, you have time. We all have time.

There’s never a limit. And to the younger people who don’t have anything and even to the kids who have everything, just follow your dreams. There’s something for you to live for. It’s hard to get out of that rock bottom. You look at your parents and they’re struggling, or you don’t have parents or have single parents and you get caught up in the wrong things because you don’t think you have a choice. You can do better. You can work doing what you like.

I pray to god every morning before going to work, before going to sleep, everything.

That’s just my way of saying everything that happens is because of god. There’s a reason behind everything. I’m the type of guy who doesn’t look at opportunities lightly because I believe everything that happens is purposeful.

So go chase your dreams. Just go out and do it. We’re all dream chasers.

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FEATURE

By Parveen Sohal

READING THIS COULD SAVE YOUR LIFE:

Q

EARTH UAKE SAFETY TIPS It is very likely that you are aware of the 4.8 magnitude earthquake which was felt by many BC residents several weeks ago. What you may not be aware of, however, is what to do to prepare yourself in case of another earthquake. We have compiled a list of tips to help you be as prepared as possible in case of any repeats of the event.

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU’RE INSIDE 1. Stay Inside - Rushing out the door puts you at greater risk as there will likely be many flying objects that could hit you with full force along the way - The exterior of your home is a very dangerous place to be as windows, frames and facades will be the first to collapse 2. “Drop, Cover and Hold On” - Drop to the ground before the movement of the earthquake causes you to fall

-

-

Cover your head and neck Hold on until the shaking stops and 60 seconds a er that

3. Find your nearest table or desk to go under - Studies show that the greatest number of injuries are caused by flying objects (e.g., TV’s, bookcases, glass cabinets, etc.,) so you want to be covered - Use one hand to hold on to the table/ desk legs and the other to hold onto your head and neck - Be prepared to move with the table/ desk 4. If there’s no nearby table or desk - Get down and cover your head next to an interior wall (exterior walls have windows that can sha er) - Face away from windows 5. Do not go under a doorway - Contrary to popular belief, doorways are not stronger than other parts of your home and they also pose a greater danger as a swinging door can hit you 6. If you’re in bed - Stay put and cover your head with a pillow

Moving from a bed puts you at risk for coming into contact with flying objects

7. The most dangerous room is your kitchen - Evacuate your kitchen immediately if possible: as mentioned previously, falling objects pose the greatest threat and there are numerous heavy appliances that can harm you in your kitchen - If you have a gas stove that is on, turn it off before evacuating if possible

WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU’RE OUTSIDE 1. Get to an open area - Get as far away from buildings, trees, power lines, etc., as possible - Drop and cover in case of flying debris 2. If inside a vehicle - Pull over to the side of the road and press on the breaks - Stay inside your vehicle until the shaking stops - Avoid bridges, overpasses, tunnels, power lines, trees, light posts, etc

WHAT TO DO AFTER THE SHAKING HAS STOPPED 1. Count to 60 - check for injuries, remain alert for falling objects 2. How to help injured parties - Apply first aid if qualified

32

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DESI View

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Do not move injured parties unless they are in serious danger

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3. Prevent danger - Check for fires, gas leaks water leaks, damaged electrical wiring etc., - Check for any appliances that were le on (turn them off )

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4. If you smell gas - Do not light candles/matches - Evacuate the building 5. Find uncontaminated water - Purify water by boiling for at least 7 minutes - If you cannot boil water, strain water through paper towels or layers of clean cloth 6. Do not use telephone - Unless there is a severe injury, gas leak or fire to report - You do not want to clog up the telephone lines 7. If driving - Stay off of “Disaster Response Routes” for emergency vehicles - Stay at least 10 meters away from power lines that have gone down

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8. Protect yourself from tsunami threat - Avoid low-lying areas and waterfronts 9. A ershock preparation - A ershocks can occur minutes or even hours a er an earthquake - Stay together, obtain first aid kits/ food/water, secure tables/desk to take cover under - “Foreshocks” are earthquakes experienced days or even weeks later

WHAT TO KEEP IN YOUR EARTHQUAKE SURVIVAL KIT 1. Nonperishable food (nutrition bars, trail mix, etc) 2. Bo led water 3. Blankets, jackets, sweatshirts, sturdy shoes 4. Flashlight with fresh ba eries 5. Ba ery-operated radio with fresh batteries 6. Small first aid kit 7. Whistle 8. Gloves 9. Waterproof matches 10. Knife 11. Toilet paper 12. Small fire extinguisher 13. Duct tape www.desitoday.ca

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FEATURE

What’s in a Name?

Foreign Name Prejudice and Hiring

H E L LeO is my nam

ce n u o n o r P o t d r Ha

By Tina Goulart-Rallhan

My husband has a long, complicated name! Even for a Punjabi it is quite rare and even a bit serious in nature. Names are incredibly important in India. In North America, most people I know choose names for their sounds or family tradition. In India most names have a deep meaning. It is a hope that the trib34

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DESI View

utes of that name may impact the life of the person with that name.

Punjabi names are exceptionally long, usually in two different parts. Sikh names are traditionally gender neutral, which further teaches the Sikh tradition of gender equality. There are some names that are gender specific (my husband’s name

is very masculine so I can’t imagine a girl with his name) but it is less common.

Many Indians choose nicknames.

Sometimes it is a western name other times just a shortened version or their original name or sometimes something completely different. For example Jaswinder can become the nickname Jessie. www.desitoday.ca

Even Forbes, a Business magazine has an article title: “Have a Foreign-Sounding Name?

Change it to Get a Job” Many Sikh names are known to have a meaning associated with God. My husbands name is very religious in nature!

His name is Gurucharan Guru-religious teacher/prophet Charan-At the feet.

So the translation is “At the feet of the Prophet”.

I love his name, I believe it is very noble and beautiful! I have to admit it is a long and very foreign sounding name to North Americans. Most North Americans that try to say it usually over complicate it. The truth is no one really uses his full name.

I don’t even use his full name! When we met for the first time he introduced himself as GC, and that is what most people know him as. His family has a childhood pet name. Gaggi. Which I think sounds adorable! I could never use this name for him because I imagine a very small child.

It has really shocked me to realize that something as simple as a name can affect a person’s life so dramatically! Here is his story.

My husband and I were married the weekend before graduating from college.

He had to switch his visa from a student visa to a Green Card once we were married. Once we got that Green Card in the mail we were overjoyed. He jumped right into the job search! He looked everywhere.

Sent out hundreds of applications and resumes. He heard nothing for over a year!

Not a single interview! He finally took a job at a gas station making minimum wage because we needed the money! He felt defeated.

One day I decided to go over his resume and cover le er to see if I could make any improvements. Everything looked great.

I made one suggestion, to change his name on his resume from his full name Gurucharan to his nickname GC. He was resistant to this idea, thinking that GC sounded too informal. He also thought www.desitoday.ca

that resumes required the full legal name, but I explained that applications require legal name but resume can be any name that people call you. We decided to give it a try, there was nothing to lose.

Within a week he received three calls for interviews that resulted in two job offers. Our whole life changed in a single moment! He had finally started on his career path!

We were so happy, but there was a part of me that was really upset!

Did his name really keep him from ge ing a job? This could not be a coincidence!

We had suffered and gone without for two years while my husband had the qualifications for a much be er job. All because of his name! To this day I am still very upset that we went through all of those struggles simply because some hiring manager made conclusion about my husband based on his name alone?

Were these people afraid to say his name wrong on a phone call requesting him for an interview? Did they think that he would not speak English or would not fit into the working environment because of being foreign? Did these people understand the effect that they had on our family?

I had read studies in the past about

how traditionally African American names affected a person’s ability to get a call back for an interview in comparison to traditional “white” names.

“In a study done by The National Bureau of Economic Research, 5000 resumes responded to help-wanted ads in Chicago and Boston newspapers. Half the resumes were sent with African-American names and the other half were sent with whitesounding names. The number of callbacks for each resume received for interviews was counted. Thus, they experimentally manipulated perception of race via the name on the resume. The results indicate large racial differences in callback rates to a phone line with a voice mailbox attached and a message recorded by someone of the appropriate race and gender.

Job applicants with white names needed to send about 10 resumes to get one callback; those with African-American names needed to send around 15 resumes to get one callback. This would suggest either employer prejudice or employer perception that race signals lower productivity.”

Even Forbes, a Business magazine has an article title: “Have a Foreign-Sounding Name? Change it to Get a Job” It angers me to know that something as simple as a name can change a person’s chances of success. That people with the power to hire can make such an opinion based on such li le information. My husband’s name is beautiful! It’s long, but it has deep meaning! To this day he still applies for jobs with his shortened named knowing that using his full name can mean failure.

Instead of people changing their foreign sounding names, it is the a itudes and ignorance of our community that must be changed.

H E L LeO is my nam

e m o s e w A FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DESI View

35

FEATURE

Abbotsford Born

“Jasmeen Johal” Walks Lakme Fashion Week In India

By Parveen Sohal

As we anticipate the February Lakme Fashion week event, let’s celebrate our local girl, Jasmeen Johal, for walking the most recent show this last August. Lakme Fashion Week is arguably the biggest fashion event in Mumbai where many familiar faces such as Deepika Padukone, Kareena Kapoor and Arjun Rampal have been featured on the runway. It has included international labels such as Louis Vuitton, Dolce & Gabbana, Manish Malhotra, Rohit Bal, Sabyasachi and many more. We are proud that this Abbotsford born girl is representing her community and her hometown for one of India’s most anticipated events in fashion

The most blissful moment I have experienced was when I got the opportunity to walk for Lakme fashion week.

It was not easy taking the step of leaving everything behind and heading to Mumbai but with the support of my loving family and friends I went ahead and took the leap. From the audition process to the actual fashion week itself, it was all so surreal. Never in my life would I have imagined I could be among the presence of such talented and inspirational individuals who I’ve been following all 36

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DESI View

my life. The whole Lakme journey was a learning experience for me. When it comes to showbiz things in India work a lot differently than they do here in the Lower Mainland, It was different at first but through the twenty days that I was there I gave it my all to adapt to the changes. It was a dream come true!

Looking back at how far you have came is one of the most amazing feelings, and appreciating the present is very necessary for me.

One essential lesson that I have www.desitoday.ca

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learned throughout my journey is the importance of being uncomfortable yet staying faithful in life. When I first started off in this field, there was so much that I wanted to conquer that it all seemed impossible to achieve. Even though I was extremely passionate and hungry to fulfill my dreams, the constant fear of FAILURE would prevent me from doing so. Eventually I le it up to God and focused on the only thing that I could control….working my bu off. As time and my career progressed, I reflected back on how important it is was for me feel uncomfortable. As someone once said, “Problems are not stop signs, they are guidelines.” The negative situations and recurring thoughts were the only things standing in my way. The struggles helped me learn a lot about myself honestly and made every accomplishment that much sweeter!

Although I have many goals set for the future and have a long way to go, I am thankful, blessed, and lucky to be surrounded my so much love and support each day of my life. Thank you to all my well wishers and hopefully this small town Abbotsford girl can continue to spread love and maybe someday represent our beautiful country internationally. God bless and stay grinding. www.desitoday.ca

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FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DESI View

37

FEATURE

Co����n��n�

Indian Females

By Amrita Lit

Many Indo-Canadian females would agree that we were not only taught to fear

It became apparent to me how so very

to them. I remember noticing that no mat-

backwards our culture still is when I first

ter how strong-willed and forward think-

got married. My education - what gave me

ing my mother was, she still took care of

my identity, suddenly wasn’t relevant any-

and metaphorically “bowed down” to one

more.

person, my father. No ma er what, meals

My bachelor’s degree from which I grad-

would be served to his liking right infront

uated with honors didn’t ma er. My ability

of him. It would be perfectly placed with

to type out a 20 page essay in less than an

his perfectly round roti next to his favou-

hour didn’t ma er either. What ma ered

rite side of green chillies and sliced onions

was how well I fulfilled the role of wife and

– with each and every meal.

daughter-in-law. I am sure this experience

I saw it in all my extended family mem-

well.

So why the codependence and subser-

work – but the man parked himself

viency? Why must we not believe in our-

infront of the television while the

selves to be all we need. To be put first. To

woman worked tiredlessly to wait

be all that we can be and have a fulfilled

on him hand and foot for the re-

and happy life. No, the goal is to be married by your mid-twenties, and completely

Sure this is commonplace

devoted to caring for the men in your life

in most households but what

while still doing your equal share in con-

differentiates the Indian culture from others is that we aren’t vouching for female

tributing to the household.

Seems a bit behind the times, does it not?

empowerment and in-

Perhaps it’s time we too teach our girls

depdence like the rest

that they can DO anything, BE anything,

of the world is. We are

and IF they choose to be married it’ll be to

still raising our li le

someone who values their intelligence and

girls with the ideal

independence and stays beside them, not

of being a man’s

in front.

perfect li le daugh-

Let’s stop raising followers and create

ter, sister, or wife

some solid leaders to be the new heads

in order to make

of the household, because let’s face it – us

their lives easier.

women do all the work anyway, why not let

The home revolves News With A DESI View

has been seen in many other households as

an could come home exhausted from

mainder of the evening.

FEB / MAR 2016

costs.

the men in our life but also be subservient

bers homes too. Both the man and wom-

38

around the head of the household at all

us be the ones in charge once in a while?

www.desitoday.ca

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FEATURE

How The Government Can Increase Social Inclusion And Social Mobility Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has an amazing opportunity to leave his mark on Canada just like his father who ushered in the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms.

Perhaps our new Prime Minister can introduce a new national “Social Inclusion and Social Mobility Charter” to ensure that everyone in Canada whether rich or poor has the services and supports they need to reach their potential.

Who knows how many Nobel Prize winners could never reach their potential in Canada because they were hungry or

40

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DESI View

homeless? This is a huge waste of our human resources. We need to tap into the greatness of all our citizens and watch the country flourish.

So how can the government increase social inclusion and social mobility?

This got me thinking about the great American psychologist, Abraham Maslow, who developed the concept of the “hierarchy of needs.” This theory stated that humans need to have their basic physiological needs met such as food, water, sleep, and sex before progressing

onto more advanced levels of human development such as safety which includes personal, financial, and health security; love and belonging which includes friendship, family, and intimacy; esteem which includes self-esteem and selfconfidence, and finally self-actualization which is where creativity and problem solving take hold.

Interestingly, Maslow published his theory in 1943 shortly a er WWII and was the descendant of Jewish immigrants from Russia. Who be er to describe what humans need to survive

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and function and develop to their fullest ability than someone connected to the horrors of war in his homeland and coming from a community devastated by the holocaust.

So how can we apply Maslow’s ideas to

social inclusion and social mobility?

ment, and innovation.

Well, the Canadian government can develop and fund strong national programs to ensure everyone has their basic needs met in order for them to progress to higher levels of development, achieve-

A new collective social contract and understanding that it’s in the national interest for all levels of government to invest in its citizens for the greater good would need to become a top priority.

So what are some ideas and who will pay for them?

Nutrition – Millions of children, youth, and families live in poverty and cannot afford nutritious meals. The government can legislate that all grocery stores and farmers markets have to donate their unused food to breakfast clubs, hot lunch programs, community kitchens, and food banks in their local neighbourhood. Nonprofit organizations can partner with culinary schools to prepare and deliver the meals.

Day Care – The shortage and cost of day care is a huge issue throughout Canada.

Most parents need day care because they are going to work or school. The government can develop incentives, therefore, for employers and educational institutions to develop day care centres at worksites and include day care subsidy as an employee benefit.

Education – Post-secondary education is one of the best predictors of improved social outcomes. Unfortunately, many bright students cannot afford to do graduate studies or research due to the high burden of student debt and basic living costs. The government can peg the cost of post-secondary education to a percentage of a family’s income. This would make it affordable for everyone. Families that earn less money would pay less and families that earn more would pay more.

However, the percentage would remain the same for everyone. This would be truly progressive and increase opportunities for all. Families experiencing undue hardship could apply for an education grant.

Health – Our health care system is falling apart due to increased pressures and lack of funding. I support new and innovative

approaches to deliver health care such as through increased public and non-profit and technological sectors. In terms of funding, it makes sense that a universal health care “insurance” program have “premiums” like all insurance programs. I would peg these premiums to the rate of inflation with premium assistance for the poor. The government can also expand health care services to include dental, vision, and professional social work, psychological, and clinical counselling to support the mental health and wellness of the nation.

Recreation – Children and youth need to engage in fitness and sports at an early age to stay healthy, develop social skills, and learn to work as part of a team. Many families cannot afford to send their children to baseball, soccer, hockey, or swimming teams in their community. A national athletic program has to be developed to nurture athletics in youth. Funding for this program can be obtained by introducing a junk food tax and increasing taxes on all private corporations who would directly benefit from an expansion of the national sports and athletics program such as sports clothing, sports drinks, sports shoes, and other similar corporations.

There are many other ideas such as investing in the arts and culture, libraries and schools, developing mentorship and youth programs, safeguarding our natural environment, and introducing a guaranteed annual income for the needy. The ideas are endless.

Let’s just hope that our new Prime Minister will make social inclusion and social mobility a reality for those that are currently neglected and not a priority for our political class.

Alex Sangha is an award winning author and social worker based in Surrey, B.C. His social discussion book, Catalyst, was a Finalist in the Current Events and Social Change category of the Next Generation Indie Book Awards of 2014. For more information about Alex check out his author blog at h p://alexsangha.com www.desitoday.ca

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DESI View

41

FEATURE

From Teaching to Law:

PREETKA BRAR’S JOURNEY Preetka Brar was a grade 7 teacher on the road to becoming an elementary school principal when she steered onto the prestigious path of practicing law. She founded her Surrey-based law firm, Brar Law, and practices exclusively in the area of Personal Injury. Preetka’s story serves as a reminder that we can continuously further our professional lives and can have multiple careers in one lifetime. Find out what made her become an ICBC lawyer, what ultimately drove her to open up her own practice and the knowledge and experiences she gained along the way.

By Parveen Sohal

What made you get into law a er teaching?

It was a difficult decision to leave my secure full time contract with the Surrey School District, where I had been teaching for five years, and move to Edmonton for law school. I think somewhere deep down I always wanted to be a lawyer so I wrote the LSAT and the rest is history. Teaching came naturally to me but I was ready for the next challenge. As a Grade 7 teacher, I was enriching the young minds of future generations. Now, as a lawyer, I get to utilize my legal knowledge to advocate for my clients and ensure a fair and just outcome for them. I believe that in today’s world, one can have multiple careers and one shouldn’t be confined to stay on a certain path dictated

and handling his routine denial le ers. At

This was a strategic career move. I became

a young age, I quickly learned the frustra-

one of their own and took instructions from

tion that came with the entire process and

adjusters, who just a year ago I was arguing

the imbalance of power that can occur

with from the other side. I ventured to the

when there isn’t a lawyer there to assist you.

“dark side� as some of my colleagues call it.

Dealing directly with ICBC is stressful for

Now that I have worked on both sides I have

injured persons and it is important to level

a strong foundation to help my clients. Brar

the playing field by hiring a lawyer. I deal

Law is a personal injury firm where we spe-

with a great number of claims each day, but

cialize exclusively in ICBC injury claims and

with each client I come into contact with, I

we act only for injured persons.

am reminded of my father’s struggle and my ultimate goal is to assist injured clients with their insurance claims. At Brar Law, if you have been injured we are on your side and deal with ICBC for you.

Why did you decide to defend ICBC claims?

What made you go from an ICBC defense lawyer to opening a private practice?

I am an entrepreneur at heart. I was practicing on my own prior to joining the downtown firm and then returned back to prac-

by societal pressures. The only limits you

Knowledge is power. I was practic-

ticing on my own. The grass always looks

have are the limits you believe.

ing exclusively in the area of ICBC

greener on the other side. However, I quick-

personal injury claims for injured victims in

ly realized I enjoyed the business aspect of

the lower mainland for several years when I

law and assisting injured persons rather

had the opportunity to work at one the top

than defending the insurance company and

I have a personal issue with insur-

insurance Defence firms in Canada. I took

meeting billable targets every month. I re-

ance companies. As the eldest of

the leap of faith and embraced the journey

turned to my roots determined to serve the

Why personal injury law?

four children, I had the responsi-

of working on the Defence side to learn how

community where I grew up. I want to give

bility of assisting my disabled father with

ICBC managed litigated files. My new client

back by helping my community and that

his lengthy insurance claim applications

became ICBC and not the injured victim.

gives me personal satisfaction.

42

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DESI View

www.desitoday.ca

3 QUICK TIPS FOR HANDLING AN ICBC CLAIM 1. Consult a personal injury lawyer before speaking to ICBC 2. If you are injured see your family doctor or walk in clinic as soon as possible and follow what the doctor is advising you to do, such as physiotherapy treatment 3. Do not sign ICBC documents such as statement, authorizations, or se lement release until you fully understand what you are signing. If you are unsure consult a personal injury lawyer

What is Brar’s Law mission statement?

We understand how stressful it can be dealing with ICBC on your own.

The process for many injured clients is daunting and our goal is to work with our clients as a team. Consulting with a lawyer is intimidating for many and at Brar Law, our mission is to provide exceptional service to our community and successfully obtain a higher se lement from ICBC in a timely manner for our injured clients.

What advice do you have for people who are considering changing careers but feel hesitant?

What do you want to be when you grow up? Is not a question that has only one answer. Yes, some do have a clear answer and pursue that one career and are very happy with what they do for a life time but some do not know. I agree

EDUCATION Bachelor of Laws, University of Alberta, 2006 Bachelor of Education (Intermediate), University of British Columbia, 1997 Bachelor of Arts (Sociology), University of British Columbia, 1994

it can be scary switching careers especially with looming financial responsibilities. I followed my inner voice and that led me to my calling in life.

I believed I could and I did. Sometimes you find yourself in just the right place at just the right time.

www.desitoday.ca

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DESI View

43

FEATURE

GROUP LEARNING MAKES KIDS

ACTIVE DECISION-MAKERS Participating in collaborative group work to learn about important social issues can make children be er decisionmakers than their peers who learn the same curriculum through teacher-led discussions, says a new study. “Collaborative group work positions students as active decision-makers, whereas direct instruction places them in a passive role, following the reasoning of their teacher,� said study lead author Xin Zhang from University of Illinois in the US. “If children are to become thoughtful decision-makers, they need more time in the school day for collaborative group work that involves active reasoning about significant issues,� Zhang added.

The study involving more than 760 fi h-grade students compared the efficacy of collaborative group work with conventional direct instruction at promoting students’ ability to make reasoned decisions.

The students studied a six-week curriculum in which they explored whether a community should hire professional hunters to kill a pack of wolves that was causing many residents concern.

Students examined various perspectives on the issue, including the potential impact on the ecosystem, the local economy and public policy.

The curriculum’s purpose was not to lead students to a predetermined best an-

swer but to raise their awareness about making responsible and reasoned decisions, Zhang said.

A er completing the wolf curriculum, the students wrote two individual essays: one that explained their personal decision on what should be done about the wolf pack, and another about their decision on a moral dilemma between two friends, presented in the story “The Pinewood Derby�.

In the story, a boy named Jack has a friend named Thomas who wins a pinewood derby competition but later confesses to Jack that he violated the rules by

enlisting his older brother’s help in building his car. A er reading the story, the students were asked to write an essay about whether Jack should reveal his friend’s dishonesty.

The researchers found that children who had worked in collaborative groups on the wolf project were be er prepared to take on the role of decision-maker about Jack’s moral dilemma with his friend Thomas.

These children were more proficient at three key aspects of decision-making: recognising more than one side of a dilemma, considering a range of reasons to support differing viewpoints, and weighing the costs and benefits associated with different decisions, according to the researchers.

The study was published in American Educational Research Journal, IANS

44

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DESI View

www.desitoday.ca

www.desitoday.ca

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A Desi View

45

LOVE & RELATIONSHIP

TOP C1ES0TO TAKE

By Parveen Sohal

CREATIVE PLA

r e n t r a P Your

Let’s be real: no one wants to go to another dinner date for Valentine’s Day. Let’s get creative together! We’ve compiled a list of the most creative and romantic places to take your partner within the Lower Mainland.

Whistler’s Scandinave Spa

Bike Seawall

The Dirty Apron Cooking School

8010 Mons Rd, Whistler, BC

745 Denman Street, Vancouver BC

540 Beatty St, Vancouver, BC

Enjoy a day of oasis for your date: book a couple’s massage, take a midnight swim, visit the reading huts and much more.

Ideal for the couple that wants to spend the day relaxing with one another in the luxurious and serene location.

The couple that bikes together, stays together! Some may say this is just a saying but you can quite literally be attached to your partner during your romantic ride with a tandem-style bike! There will be a lot of laughter as you try to steer and balance the large contraption.

What’s more romantic than learning how to cook an exotic dish with your loved one? Enjoy four hours of intimate hands-on cooking in a beautiful and large kitchen.

46

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

www.desitoday.ca www.desitoday.ca

LOVE & RELATIONSHIP blue lights of the large aquatic tanks?

Explore with your date as you visit beluga whales, dolphins, otters, jellyfish and much more!

Drive Thru Movie 260 Street and Fraser Hwy, Langley BC

Sea to Sky Gondola 36800 BC-99, Squamish, BC The Sea to Sky Gondola will take you and your date on a romantic 10 minute ride up to the mountain to the Summit Lodge. Once you two reach the top, the beautiful scenic nature is ready for you two to explore. There are viewing platforms, trails to hike, rock climbing, a beautiful lodge and much more.

Ideal for a newer relationship. Sweep your date off their feet with some oldschool romance. Watch a classic as you share quiet whispers and attempt the old “yawn and stretch” for the perfect cute Valentine’s date!

Casino River Rock Casino 8811 River Rd, Vancouver BC If you and your date enjoy a little thrill, visit your local casino where you and your partner can use numbers coordinating to important dates in your relationship to gamble the night away! Dress up in your fanciest clothes and make it a Gatsby-esque night of romance that you and your date will never forget!

Dr. Sun Yat-Sen Classical Chinese Garden 578 Carrall Street Vancouver, BC This 15th century built, authentic Dynasty style garden is the recipient of “World’s Top City Garden” by Natural Geographic and is one of most romantic places you can take your date this year.

It is based on the harmony of the four main elements: water, rock, plants and architecture and is sure to bring the perfect yin and yang to your date this year!

Exit Canada

Fly Over Canada

15345 BC-10, Surrey BC

201-999 Canada Pl, Vancouver, BC What’s more romantic than a virtual ride over the most beautiful parts of Canada?

Tickle your date’s senses: experience the smell of lavender, wood and grass; the feeling mist of water, wind and ride movement. Most importantly, view the sight of your date falling further and further in love with you!

Aquarium 845 Avison Way, Vancouver, BC

For all adventurous couples, step into a 5-D real life mystery! You and your partner will work together using clues and riddles to get yourselves out of a locked room. Choose between: The Psychiatric Unit, Antique Museum, a Cabin, and even a Military Base. The perfect date option for the couple that wants to put their brain and hearts together this year!

What’s more romantic than the dimmedwww.desitoday.ca

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

47

LOVE & RELATIONSHIP

The A couple years ago the concept of online dating was reserved for those considered “second tier” in the dating world.

A stigma surrounded popular websites in which people secretly and light heartedly signed up in order to “just see what’s out there.” But now, a new social media application which sole purpose is to use an online platform to unite likeminded individuals in intimate and potentially long-term relationships is sweeping the nation. Or perhaps the nation is swiping with eager interest to find their “one true love” – or their next booty call.

The app Tinder has caught popularity like viral wildfire to individuals who are hoping to match up with someone attractive and compatible, looking for exactly what they are. This may be what is most appealing to so many; that whether you’re looking for a one night stand or your soul mate, it’s pretty clear from the get go what you’re about to get once you’re matched up and chatting with someone.

This helps avoid incongruent ideals and potentially damaging unions to people who might not be seeking out the same thing as one another. It’s clear to see what has attracted people to this “dating app.” It’s so very simple to use. You see something you like, you swipe, talk to them, meet up, and things progress naturally from there – or maybe not if their online self didn’t quite match up with their “in real life” self.

But what does this do to future generations expectations of finding a life long partner? This seems so “wham-bamthank-you ma’am.” Where’s the charm?

Where’s the chase? Where’s the mystery and butterflies? This seems to straight to the point and missing what love is all about – effort.

It’s a very laidback and passive way to 48

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

Phenomenon

By Amrita Lit

jump into a relationship if you ask me. As if it wasn’t easy enough to keep someone “at bay” in today’s day and age. Now all we got to do is log on to an app and let it do all the work for us? How much are we really going to value a relationship that began this way?

How trusting a woman or man must be to meet up with a complete stranger and decide they MIGHT just work out just based on a few lines and a photograph? Is that all it takes now? How low have our standards really become?

Call me old fashioned, or maybe a hopeless romantic, but Tinder just doesn’t sit right with me. Something about it takes the very essence of the

platform of a long lasting and successful relationship right out of it.

Get out there and MINGLE for God’s sakes. Use those corny pick-up lines, take a chance on someone you might not consider “your type.” Love hides in the strangest of places, but your phone screens shouldn’t be one.

www.desitoday.ca

Does Your Birth Order Affect Your Personality?

Psychologists have come to a general consensus that you can predict certain traits about a person depending on their birth order. If you have heard of the “middle rebel child syndrome” you know exactly what we’re talking about and, to a certain extent, psychologists agree that the middle child stereotypes are in fact true. Read below to see how accurate the predictions are.

THE ELDEST CHILD - “The Controller” Because parents tend to pay more attention to their first child simply because they are their “first” the eldest child tends to be the most confident and has very high self esteem. Further, because they are likely forced to take care of their younger siblings, they tend to be the most responsible and willing to take on leadership roles. However, this combination of attention, confidence and responsibility likely manifests to some tyrant-like traits and a tendency to need to control every situation.

THE MIDDLE CHILD - “The Emotionally-Damaged Rebel” Because the first born tends to be controlling over their younger sibling, the middle child is likely to be the most angry and competitive (as they have always been compared to the eldest). Further, because parents tend to favour the eldest for being their first-born and favor their youngest for being the cute baby of the family, the middle child tends to feel the most neglected. This contributes to their heightened emotionality. Their anger and animosity toward their controlling sibling and neglecting parents (who they feel they can never be “good enough” for) causes them to act out. Lastly, because they feel a lack of attention from their family, middle children tend to be the most social as they interact with others outside of their family to compensate for their lack of attention. This is why middle children tend to have the most friends and the busiest social life.

THE YOUNGEST CHILD - “The Carefree Wild Child” Because parents tend to get tired of enforcing harsh rules on their first two children, they tend to be more lenient on their third/last child. This means the youngest child gets the most freedom and feels entitled to be able to do things in whichever manner pleases them. The eldest will protect their younger sibling but treat them more as a baby to have fun with rather than something they must control so the youngest child tends to not develop the same hostility the middle child does. The youngest child tends to have the best relationship with both siblings as well as the parents.

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49

LOVE & RELATIONSHIP

By Navjeet (Joti) Bajwa

Candlelight Captivation Interesting Secret To Making You Look More Attractive

“As soon as I had seen her, I was lost. For Beauty’s wound is sharper than any weapon’s, and it runs through the eyes down to the soul. It is through the eye that love’s wound passes, and I now became a prey to a host of emotions.”

- Clitophon describing his love at first sight with Leucippe; in an ancient Greek love story by Achilles Tatius

50

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

We have all seen countless romantic movies that depict the typical candlelit dinner date. Dinner by candlelight has become the quintessential date as it is what people imagine first when they hear the words “romantic date”. Very few activities come close to the amount of romance the candlelit dinner provides. This all begs the question: has it become the be-all and end-all of dates just because of its depiction in media or is there an actual science behind it?

Having dinner by candlelight in a dim

lit restaurant does multiple things that add to romance. To illustrate this, let me paint a picture for you: You’re on a date with your partner in a fancy restaurant.

Sitting across from them, all you can see is your date’s face illuminated by the candlelight. Everything that isn’t them gets covered in darkness and all you can hear are the clinking of other people’s forks on their plates. Your other senses are dulled and your focus is on your date; the meal you’re sharing, the conversation you’re having, their face and their eyes. You feel

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connected. Back to reality! As you can see, many factors are at play here; some small and some large. The larger factors are the romantic setting of the restaurant, the interesting conservation, your date and the ambiance the candlelight provides. Some of the smaller aspects involve things that may surprise you. The eyes! Having dinner by candlelight increases the pupil size of your partner which has a very interesting effect on attraction levels. This is completely backed up by science! In psychology, the act of measuring one’s pupil size in response to stimuli is titled Pupillometry and it is used to measure a subject’s response to light, arousal and emotions!

Our pupils dilate when we are excited and it is an indicator of attraction to one’s partner especially in females. If a male looks across the table at his date and is greeted by enlarged pupils, he will feel as if his date is attracted to him, excited by him and very engaged. This allows the romance between the pair to grow and strengthen. So, to revisit our previous question of whether it’s the media or if there is a scientific explanation the answer is it’s a little bit of both. Movies are a great way to steal date ideas and keep the romance alive. Watching candlelit dinners on screen may inspire a couple to also have one. Mostly all couples tend to experience the decline of ideas for dates as the honeymoon period gives way and a routine sets in. Having dinner by candlelight is a surefire way to jumpstart and keep the romance alive for more established couples and are an excellent way for newer couples to build a romance together.

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LOVE & RELATIONSHIP

Is Your MOTHER FACING this

Addiction?

The Indian Drama Debacle

By Amrita Lit

Have you noticed your mother acting different lately? Using less English, and more dramatic Punjabi or Hindi dialogue?

Are they picking fights and seeing issues where they don’t exist? Well perhaps they have fallen victim to the Hindi-DramaApocalypse. It’s happening right in your homes and will reach its peak when you least expect it.

At first it’ll seem like nothing. Dinners will be late. Your daily complaints will fall upon deaf occupied ears.

Horrible, isn’t it? Well guess what?

Maybe they DESERVE to have a few hours to themselves and enjoy a guilty pleasure or two since their entire existence has always been for the purpose to serve others.

It’s like all Indian mothers have taken an oath to provide for their family’s and maintain the household to a ‘T’ without a complaint. All responsibilities fall upon 52

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

their shoulders. So, so WHAT if they enjoy a little escape from reality and some of the characterizations are rubbing off on them just a tad. I used to be part of it too.

I would complain and secretly wish the ATN satellite would be somehow sent into oblivion in outer space and I would never have to hear the sound of a zoom in effect or collective gasp when a “thaal” falls or some other inauspicious event occurs.

I felt like I just couldn’t bear these shows being blasted throughout my house 24/7.

But then it dawned upon me how much of a hypocrite I was being. I realized that I believed it to be okay to watch Friends reruns and endless Netflix series one after another but they can’t enjoy some cheesy mindless entertainment of their own?

Sure it kind of sucks that prior to the entrance of these dramas we actually had

movie and family game nights to look forward to. But then I realized that at least now my mom actually had something to be excited about and discuss with her peers. The ongoings of Saloni and whether the seventh ‘phera’ she took was worth it. Or Lakshmi and her meddling boss.

The only real complaint I have is about the never ending daughter and mother inlaw dynamic storyline has been beaten to death with these shows so perhaps they need to find something else to grasp onto.

Yes, these shows are even more predictable than Hindi movies. And yes, they seem to be subtly influencing viewers across the world like some sort of cult.

BUT, I still think all women across the world who rush through their chores to catch a glimpse of their show deserve this guilty pleasure. They should be left in peace to enjoy this time to themselves – dramatic sound effects and all. www.desitoday.ca

15 Ways To Make Someone Feel Appreciated Without Spending A Dime

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Whether it be your mom, cousin, friend or sibling, it can be easy to neglect the ones we love. Further, we often make the excuse that we’re short on cash as the reason why we don’t show tokens of appreciation. It often takes very small gestures to make a person feel appreciated so we have compiled a quick list of things you can do for the people you care about to show them a little love!

Everything on the list is completely free but is guaranteed to touch those around you.

1. Send them a “good morning” text message 2. Invite them to take a walk with you 3. Help them reconnect with someone they lost touch with in their life 4. Give them a foot massage 5. Find out what their name means and send it to them

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6. Write them a list of things you like about them 7. Ask them for advice for an important life decision 8. Cook them dinner 9. Send them a picture of you two that you like 10. Write them a card. A short, sweet “thank you for being there” note goes a long way

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LOVE & RELATIONSHIP

“Let’s r o f t e e M Coffee” Joti’s Advice Column We’ve all had a problem or two (or seven) that we just need to get off our chest.

And what do we say when we have these overly stressful, life-altering situations that we must to talk over? Let’s meet for coffee! I now welcome you to my virtual coffee shop. Here I will answer some of your most pressing questions about life, love and anything in between.

ABOUT ME:

I’m a psychology and counselling student that’s not an expert, just a friend. I read about peoples’ problems every day, all day. Now I want to hear about yours.

Ask me anything!

Dear Joti, I have been with my boyfriend for almost three years. He has met my entire family, extended family, people who have visited from India--everyone. I thought we were perfect. I thought we were going to get married. And so did my parents. But about three months ago, I found out that he had been cheating on me. After weeks of sulking and crying and feeling like my life is ruined I think I am finally getting over it. But now my problem is my family. What do I tell them? The day they met him they said “okay you two are getting married.” How do I tell them we’re not?

Do I tell him he cheated on me? If I do, what if they think we were intimate? So, do I lie? What should I say?

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FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

) Bajwa

t (Joti

By Navjee

First I’d like to tell you that you’re making a very smart decision in leaving and that I’m sorry that this happened to you. Its courageous given the pressure girls face from their families to get married. With that said you don’t need to tell your parents more than they need to know. Simply say that you found out that he was talking to other girls and being dishonest.

Your parents can fill in the blanks and it doesn’t have to be up to you to spell things out too much. Of course your parents will be upset but they should be upset that this happened to you. Parents should put the wellbeing of their child first more than anything else so they should support your decision in leaving. If they’re not supportive you need to have the inner strength to realise that this is the best thing for your long-term happiness and

try and search for other family members that can support you. Sometimes when parents hear your side from someone they consider an equal they can change their mind a little faster. If all else fails you need to look after yourself and know that you know whats best for you. Wish you the best, Joti.

Dear Joti, I have been dating this guy for a little over a month and he’s sweet and pretty funny and really cute and everything but he cannot stop talking about himself. Every conversation we have ends up being about his day, his work, his classes and it’s getting pretty annoying. Worst of all, he’s trainnig to be a body builder so half the time he’s just talking about his workwww.desitoday.ca

now she has sole custody of her kids and she never lets them see their father. He was a terrible husband—I won’t deny for a second that he was terrible husband— but he was a good father. A really good father. I genuinely don’t think he would ever hurt them and the girls miss him so much. Do I say something to her or do I leave it alone?

When he chose to behave abusively he also chose the consequences. Even the courts didn’t decide for a shared custody agreement due to the conditions of their marriage and the reason of their divorce.

Saying an abusive man was still a good father is like saying a cupcake still looks yummy even though its been in the dirt.

They may not have faced physical abuse but witnessing this abuse in the home as well as all the endless fights have dire consequences for children. The children didn’t need to see the abusive he inflicted on their mother and thinking that this is what a relationship is like is dangerous for them. With that being said, if your cousin allows her ex-husband to see her children it would be a privilege not a right.

Dear Joti,

outs and how “big” he’s getting. I’ve told him to stop but I don’t think it’s working.

Sometimes he’ll cut me off mid-conversation to talk about how sore he is from his workouts. He still is like nice and funny and stuff...do I think I should keep dating him and see if he gets better?

I’m going to concentrate on the fact that you’ve already told him to stop yet he still keeps rambling on about the gym. It is not okay for him to cut you off mid-conversation to talk about himself and how sore he is! On one hand, bodybuilding can become close to an obsession because you can’t take a break from being one. It’s always on your mind: when you’re eating, sleeping, even going to school. You have to plan meals and organize your workout schedule. People tend to talk about www.desitoday.ca

what they’re thinking about but on the other hand it’s still not good that he ignored the fact that you told him to cut it down. As good conservationists we know that whenever we’re done talking about yourselves we always end off with, “what about you? How was your day?” Both parties should be able to say their piece and feel listened to. You need to pay close attention to how much he respects your needs. Wish you the best, Joti.

Dear Joti, My first cousin and her husband just got a divorce. They have two daughters.

The reason that they split up is because he had an alcohol problem and would be abusive toward her. Now they’re dealing with the aftermath of the divorce and for

I have been dating this girl for about 2 months and everything’s going really well but I’m just getting too broke for this relationship! I am currently helping my parents pay for school and paying for my car insurance and I only work parttime so moneys a little tight for me right now. But my girlfriend likes really lavish dinners and gifts but I just can’t afford it anymore. I can’t really say anything to her because it’s just such a shot to my pride and “manhood” if I do. What do you suggest?

Relationships shouldn’t be a strain on your wallet. If your girlfriend loves lavish dinners then she can pay for them herself.

There is nothing “pathetic” about you paying for your education, your own car and earning your own money. Especially only being two months into the relationship this is a wonderful opportunity for you to learn about whom you’re with. You’re given the opportunity to learn if your girlfriend is with you for your expensive dinners and gifts or if she’s with you for you. Either way you win! You either get to be free of someone who’s materialistic or you can take off the stress on your wallet and you both can do more affordable things together. Wish you the best, Joti.

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

55

LOVE & RELATIONSHIP

Times You Must Get Out of A Relationship

By Amrita Lit

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www.desitoday.ca

1

When you are constantly miserable or seem to be making your significant other miserable.

Nobody likes feeling like shit, and no matter what it seems like they probably don’t like belittling someone and making them feel like shit either. If you can’t remember the last time you and your ‘loved one’ shared a good laugh or a good time then chances are they just aren’t making you happy anymore and vice versa. Perhaps it’s the annoying habits you used to find cute. Or it could be that you just don’t agree with the life path they’re on. Maybe it’s their friends or family – whatever it is, if you’re not happy, it’s time to make a quick exit strategy and find a way to change that!

W

ith Valentine’s Day right around the corner, it is easy to get blinded by those alltoo-familiar rose coloured glasses. While everyone picks out those flower and chocolates and reminiscences the best moments of their relationship, we must also remember the times when we must get out of a relationship. The relationships in which everyone but those involved can see this couple is just not right for each other. Yet these two individuals cling on to one another. Be it for comfort, familiarity, fear of the unknown, or just because they’re too damn lazy to do anything about their unhappiness.

Perhaps it’s the case that one person has lost interest but the other hasn’t. Have you ever been around a couple in which one partner just completely obliterates the other persons self esteem on a daily basis?

It’s like their very existence irritates them in one way or another. Well, to them I say, why not set them free then? Why continue to make someone miserable just for the sake of not wanting to let them go? Does your fear of being alone run that deep?

That you would rather make someone’s everyday life absolutely hell in order to live comfortable in yours.

There are many reasons for certain relationships not working out. But I think it all boils down to these five times I would say it is time to throw in the towel for a relationship. www.desitoday.ca

2

When you’re living in the past.

Perhaps one of you acted less than loyal at some point in time. Maybe it was a major incident, or a minor one, whatever it may be if it’s too big to shake off, and is being repeatedly brought up, it’s time to stop trying to turn the page on what happened, and forget about each other instead!

3

When the bad outweighs the good.

Sure everyone has their ups and downs. Things can’t be amazingly spectacular at all times. But if you feel unsafe, unhappy, or uneasy at any point in time in your relationship. It’s time to call it quits! Nobody should ever have the authority to pop your happy bubble and make your life negative when you very well would be much better off without them!

4

When you are constantly fighting.

Chances are you’re doing so publicly and your friends and family have dropped some subtle and some not so subtle hints that perhaps it’s time to move on. So before things get out of hand, take a deep breath and suggest you guys take a collective breather from one another, maybe a permanent one!

5

Last but not least:

Before you turn into a infidel – when you begin to notice your interest is repeatedly caught elsewhere, it might just be time to stop sneaking looks and flirty banter on the down low – and make it be know that you’d just rather be single and ready to mingle. Rather than tied down with a frown.

(Note: This goes without saying but if you are in a abusive or otherwise unhealthy relationship there is NO justification for staying in such a situation. No ma er which way you may internally excuse this these types of scenarios are unacceptable and please tell someone and/or get help any way possible ASAP).

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

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LOVE & RELATIONSHIP

CAN DRUGS

HELP REDUCE DOMESTIC VIOLENCE?

According to a recent study, a drug that causes hallucinations may have therapeutic potential for reducing intimate partner violence. Researchers explored the therapeutic potential for hallucinogens such as psilocybin or LSD. The study looked at 302 men aged 1740 in the criminal justice system. Of the 56 percent of participants who reported using hallucinogens, only 27 percent were

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arrested for later intimate partner violence (IPV) as opposed to 42 percent of the group who reported no hallucinogen use being arrested for IPV within seven years.

From the 1950s through the early 1970s, thousands of studies reported on the medical use of hallucinogens, mostly LSD. Due to the classification of the most prominent hallucinogens as Schedule I controlled substances in 1970, research on health benefits

was suspended, causing many of these studies to be forgotten. However, the study pointed out that research with hallucinogens may need a rebirth.

“Recent studies have shown that psilocybin and related compounds could revolutionise the mental health field,” Hendricks said.

“However, additional research is needed. This study suggests that hallucinogens could be a useful avenue for reducing IPV, meaning this topic deserves further attention.”

The negative effects of drugs such as these are, of course, at the forefront of the debate about using such drugs and even testing them in controlled research studies.

However, if it is found that the positive effects outweigh the negative, perhaps hallucinogens can be use as a medical tool rather than a recreational drug.

The “war on drugs” has always been a slippery slope in North America but perhaps the war on spouses can be reduced with the help of these drugs.

- IANS

www.desitoday.ca

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4. Saying “I Love You:” 5 months (144 days) 5. Updating social media status to “in a relationship” 5 months (157 days) 6. Revealing of one’s imperfections: 6 months (173 days) 7. Having your first fight: 6 months (170 days)

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“While each relationship moves at its own pace, daters are often reassured by comparing their experiences with others,” dailymail quoted Kate Taylor, dating expert for Match.com, as saying.

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59

HEALTH & WELLNESS

TO W N HO

R U O Y S O S T E K N C T I I T F S / H N T O I L T HEA RESOLU O S P I T

By Jasmeen Rahiman

Well it’s that time of the year again where we set goals for ourselves for the whole year. I am sure that the one resolution that we can all say we have either contemplated or set is: staying healthy and/or working out. Chances are at some time in your life you’ve made a New Year’s resolution — and then broken it. This year, stop the cycle of resolving to make change and then not following through. If your resolution is to take better care of yourself and get healthy, you will have a much better year if your resolution sticks. Here are 5 tips to help you stick to your resolution!

Be realistic

By now we can only hope that we know ourselves enough to know what we are capable of and what is only possible when we are dreaming. The surest way to fall short of your goal is to make your goal unattainable. For instance, resolving

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to NEVER eat your favorite food again is setting you up to fail. Instead, strive for a goal that is attainable, such as avoiding it more often than you do now. Moderation is essential!

Stay positive

Change doesn’t happen over night so don’t be discouraged if you aren’t seeing the results that you are wanting to as fast as you are wanting to see them. Know that you are doing what you can to reach your goal and it will take time.

Remain consistent

Consistency is what will bring your resolution to life. If you have totally run out of steam when it comes to keeping your resolution start again! Don’t think that just because you forgot one day or two or three that your resolution no longer applies. TRY, TRY AGAIN!

Track your progress Keep track of each small success. Shortterm goals are easier to keep, and each small accomplishment will help keep you motivated. Instead of focusing on losing 30 pounds, focus on losing the first five.

Keep a food journal to help you stay on track, and reward yourself for each five pounds lost.

Have fun

Don’t make this a chore. Remember that you are doing this because you want to and hopefully it will bring you to a happier place in your life. Make it fun for yourself!

Experts say it takes about 21 days for a new activity to become a habit and six months for it to become part of your personality. It won’t happen overnight, so be persistent and patient! Good luck!

www.desitoday.ca

HEALTH & WELLNESS

BACK AND KNEE PROBLEMS FROM IMPROPER EXERCISE

By Dhiraj Khatri

Working in the fitness industry for half a decade, I have trained hundreds of clients and had conversations with thousands of gym enthusiasts who join the gym with different goals such as: weight loss, strength gains or bodybuilding.

Almost all of them have ended up with knee pain or multiple back problems.

The knee and lower back are most dynamic and loadbearing joints of our body which, through our birth, constantly working to keep us moving. Basically, your knee and hip are both connected and if one joint is under pressure or is

www.desitoday.ca

under risk, the other is already prone to risk or injury.

THINGS TO CONSIDER: 1. When changing from sedentary life to an active life, most people don’t understand the importance of alignment of our body. To give more light on that, many people have a slouched shoulder (kyphotic posture) which is a common reason for mid back or low back pain. Also, people with over pronation of foot/flat feet where the foot starts collapsing can lead to knee/hip pain. Hence, if not assessed by qualified fitness professional or physical therapist, before starting their fitness routine, they are susceptible to injuries.

2. Poor biomechanics while working out in the gym is the major factor causing back and knee problems. Every exercise must be executed in right form and mechanics 3. Some common injuries are shin splints or planter fasciitis which can occur when your joints are experiencing too much wear and tear because your muscles are not helping enough to support your movements.

You can avoid these by strengthening and activating the correct group of muscles.

4. Keep your ego out of the weight

room. One of the simplest way to save your back and knees from unnecessary injury. Every exercise plan should be based on progression otherwise you cannot reap the benefits of the exercise in long term. But suddenly progressing from point A to point D leads your way to common back or knee problems 5. Get assessed by a qualified fitness professional or physical therapist before starting a workout program so that you should know about the red flags and it will help you to plan a better and realistic program according to your individual body.

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

61

HEALTH & WELLNESS

p U g n i Spe ed ur Yo m s i l o b a t e M What is metabolism? Metabolism is a set

struggling with the slow one here are some

of complex functions going inside the body

ways to speed it up:

to generate the energy to maintain, grow and

1. Regular physical activity:

carry on essential functions of all the organs of the body to sustain the life. Human body is made to walk, run or keep on moving.

However, thanks to new world where day by day the new inventions or technologies are making us slow and inefficient.

We hardly move or do physical work, we eat non-nutritious food, we don’t sleep right and this all causes the slowing of the metabolism. This opens the gate for weight gain, metabolic disease like diabetes, cardiovascular problems etc. Some of us are genetically gifted with fast metabolism but for those

tri

By Dhiraj Kha

4. Eat a variety of green leafy and colourful vegetables: Vitamins and minerals help us to main-

Regular physical activity increases our

tain a healthy metabolism. Eating dark

overall need of energy for our body. Hence,

green leafy vegetables and colourful fruits

keeping active often alone increases the me-

gives us ample amount of vitamin B com-

tabolism of our body.

plex which is essential for a speedy metabo-

2. Strength training or weight training:

lism.

5. HIIT or interval training:

A 30 minutes session of strength train-

I often say any exercise done in comfort

ing can keep your metabolism up for next

zone is not an exercise. Doing some high

48 to 72 hrs as found by American College

intensity workout like sprint followed by a

of Sports Medicine. A couple of planned ses-

jog or some burpees, etc can create boost in

sions in a week increases our skeletal mass

your metabolism as it increases EPOC (ex-

which helps keep our metabolism fast.

cess post-exercise oxygen consumption).

3. Eat your macros in right order:

6. Get enough omega3’s:

Keeping your diet with a good combina-

Simply increasing the intake of omega 3

tion of carbs, proteins and fats gives your

in our diet helps our metabolism to kick up

body a sustained release of energy which

as it is one of the essential fatty acid which

enhances the metabolism to keep the food

help us to maintain our blood sugar as well

burning inside the body.

as help our body to reduce inflammations. A diet rich of salmon, eggs or eating walnuts or flaxseeds helps us to get good omega3 fatty acid. Supplement of omega3 is also a good way to get the adequate amount.

7. Avoid YO-YO diets: Deciding

to

cut

down

substantial

amounts of food can result in short term weight loss but it affects your overall metabolism. Your body needs food in order to sustain some basic functions of life. Look at your lifestyle: are you sedentary, active or very active? Get a consultation from a professional in order to increase physical activity or reduce your overall calories. “To break it take seconds but to make it take years.”

Overall your mantra should be to eat clean and your body will give you back energy and

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FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

a disease free happy life.

www.desitoday.ca

HEALTH & WELLNESS

COTTON CANDY MACHINES PAVE THE WAY FOR ARTIFICIAL ORGANS Taking a cue from cotton candy machines, scientists have developed a 3D artificial capillary system that can keep living cells viable and functional for more than a week, thus paving the way for making life-sized artificial livers, kidneys, bones and other essential organs.

Leon Bellan, assistant professor of mechanical engineering at Tennesseebased Vanderbilt University, has been tinkering with cotton candy machines for years.

Student in the Bellan Lab using a commercial cotton candy machine to His goal is to make fibre spin hydrogel fibers. networks that can be used as templates to produce the cell capillary researchers must build in a network of systems required to create full-scale artichannels that allow fluids to flow through ficial organs. the system, mimicking the natural capil“Some people in the field think this aplary system. proach is a little crazy but now, we have According to Bellan, his cotton-candy shown we can use this simple technique spinning method can produce channels to make microfluidic networks that mimranging from three to 55 microns, with a ic the 3D capillary system in the human mean diameter of 35 microns. body in a cell-friendly fashion,” Bellan So far, the other approaches have only managed to create networks with microchannels larger than 100 microns, about ten times the size of capillaries.

“Our experiments show that after seven days, 90 percent of the cells in a scaffold with perfused microchannels remained alive and functional compared to only 60 to 70 percent in scaffolds that were not perfused or did not have microchannels,” Bellan wrote.

Bellan and his team will fine tune their Dr Leon Bellan (Vanderbilt University) technique to match the characteristics of noted in a paper that appeared in the Adthe small vessel networks in different vanced Healthcare Materials journal. types of tissues and explore a variety of Bellan is currently focusing on watercell types. based gels called hydrogels, and using “Our goal is to create a basic ‘toolbox’ them as scaffolds to support cells within that will allow other researchers to use 3D artificial organs. this simple, low-cost approach to create To engineer tissues that have the the artificial vasculature needed to susthickness of real organs and keep cells tain artificial livers, kidneys, bone and alive throughout the entire scaffold, the other organs,” Bellan noted. www.desitoday.ca

Thumb Sucking WHEN DO CUTE HABITS HARM YOUR CHILD’S TEETH? By Dr. Diya Chadha

Certified Specialist in Pediatric Dentistry

Dr. Karim Kanani

Certificate in Pediatric Dentistry

www.smiletowndentistry.com

What’s cuter than a photograph of a sweet baby nestling into their crib with their favourite blanket sucking on their thumb as they sleep? Parents can all agree that tooth decay is anything but cute. Every parent knows that their infant will suck on their thumb at one point or another, but the question they may not know the answer to is: when should you stop them?

Thumb sucking (or sucking on any object such as a pacifier) is actually a natural reflex for most infants and can act as a soothing agent to induce sleep or relaxation.

However, thumb sucking should discontinue when your child’s permanent teeth appear. This usually coincides with your child being between two and four years old. If your child sucks on their permanent teeth, this can cause problems with the alignment of their teeth, can inhibit proper growth of the mouth and cause changes in the roof of their mouth.

Infants tend to suck their thumbs to sooth themselves when they are anxious about something.

To reduce your child’s thumb sucking, find out what they are anxious about and help sooth them yourself.

Also, make sure to reward your child when they are not sucking on their for the best outcome.

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

63

HEALTH & WELLNESS

STOP TREATING

AS YOUR DOCTOR At one time or another, most of us have turned to the internet to self-diagnose a rash, bug bite or an upset tummy. While the internet can provide a wealth of knowledge when it comes to simple health complaints, are we taking risks with our health by relying on it too much? Or is it a valuable resource we should use more often? There are two sides to the argument.

Are you among those who log in to Google every time you are down with body ache, fever or cold, only to get more confused and scared?

Many young Indians with smartphones in their hands are falling prey to the “Google-asyour-doctor” phenomenon and the dangerous trend is on the rise in the country, health experts feel.

Although there is nothing wrong in checking your symptoms or trying to find more about your illness on the internet, they say that one should know where to stop.

The ideal situation is to use search engines only when someone is diagnosed with a certain medical condition and wants to know more about it. The information available on 64

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

internet should be used to educate oneself rather than trying to find a cure for the disease.

“The biggest problem is that internet is loaded with enormous information which could be correct too but then your symptoms could be similar to some other disease which may cause confusion. Therefore, correct diagnosis of your health abnormality is very important,” Dr. Satnam Singh Chhabra, head (neuro-spine surgeon) at the Sir Gangaram Hospital here, told IANS. He has observed many young Indian adults getting hooked to the internet to look for every little thing, even self-diagnosis.

For instance, if one has a health abnormalwww.desitoday.ca

ity, then the instant reaction is to Google the symptoms before seeing an expert or a doctor.

“But one should be careful as people normally look for symptoms to get rid of curiosity and anxiety but to the contrary, it just worsens the scenario and leaves them more anxious,” Chhabra said.

According to Dr. (Prof) Raju Vaishya, senior consultant (orthopaedic and joint replacement surgeon) at Indraprastha Apollo Hospital, one should beware of getting trapped into “Google as your doctor” behaviour as this may cause more harm than good.

“Yes, there is an increasing surge in young Indians with smartphones who google common health symptoms. I find more such patients coming to me with queries related to hand, wrist and elbow,” Vaishya told IANS. Dr. R K Singal of the BLK Super-specialty Hospital had an interesting case study to share: “Once a patient in his mid-30s came to me with severe headache. He told me that he thought he had a brain tumour. After diagnosis, we found that headache was due to prolonged sore throat and rhinopharyngitis (common cold).”

“The patient visited me after a month of self-diagnosis through internet. Whatever he found on the internet made him believe that he had a brain tumour,” Singal told IANS. According to Singal, people in the 2540 age group are more hooked on to the internet and such self-diagnosis only increases one’s anxiety.

Dr. Rahul Gupta, senior neuro and spine surgeon at Fortis Hospital in Noida, is attending to many young Indians who come to him with weird health queries after scanning Google.

“Self-medication via the internet can be dangerous. Patients at times do not follow our advice and waste our time with silly questions,” he stressed.

According to Gupta, Google is good when it comes to searching for a good doctor, checking spellings of a medication and reading about general health-related issues.

Another danger of self-diagnosis is that you may think that there is more wrong with you than there actually is.

“For example, if you had insomnia, inattention and depression, you may believe www.desitoday.ca

people in the 25-40 age group are more hooked on to the internet and such self-diagnosis only increases one’s anxiety. that you have a sleep disorder or major depression. Thus, you may make things worse by worrying more as well,” Singal noted.

Self-diagnosis is also a problem when you are in a state of denial about your symptoms.

One may think that generalised body aches started with a worsening of mood, but a doctor may elect to do an electrocardiogram for chest pain that reveals possible coronary artery disease, the experts felt.

Are health websites trustworthy when it comes to answering health symptom queries?

“I don’t see any harm in doing that because it’s about your health after all.

In fact, a lot of times my patients come back with queries after surfing about

their health abnormality on the internet,” Chhabra said.

So, educate yourself as much before or after you visit your doctor, but let the experts do their job. Let your doctor prescribe you a treatment well-suited for your ailment.

“One should be wise enough to understand which is an authentic website with relevant content as there are a lot of paid sites which exist only to make business,” Chhabra advised.

Vaishya asked youngsters to share their internet-acquired knowledge with the doctor but not to force it upon the doctor to follow it.

“Trust your doctor more than Google,” Gupta summed up.

- By Nishant Arora, IANS

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

65

BEAUTY & ENTERTAINMENT

I CUT MY HAIR FOR SALMAN KHAN 10 THINGS PRINCE NARULA REVEALED Bigg Boss 9 winner Prince Narula revealed the real reason behind his haircut, and shared some gyan about life in a live chat.

Believe it or not, there’s still stuff about Bigg Boss 9 winner Prince Narula that you and I don’t know.

The reality TV star revealed quite a few details about himself that took us by surprise, even though we’ve been watching him every night for the last three-anda-half months. The 28-year-old also set the record straight about a few controversies surrounding him in the house. Here is an excerpt, directly in Prince’s words: 1. I will be doing fiction shows next. If after a year I feel that should do a reality show then I would do Khatron Ke Khiladi, otherwise Bigg Boss was my last reality show.

2. Main dil se khelta hun, dimag ghar pe rakh ke jata hun.

Game dimag se nai dil se khelo, toh tumhe koi nai hara sakta.

3. I was the best cook in the house. Jab task hota tha toh maine khane mein zada masala dalta that so that sab bathroom mein zada time rahe. (laughs) 4. I will go home for 10 days, and eat parathas cooked by my mother. After that I will start gymming.

5. I don’t want to get married for at least 10 years. Jo rishtey reality shows mein bantey hai, who tikte nahi hain... Maine aur Nora ne decide kiya tha ki jab hum bahar niklenge toh hum time spend kareinge and dekhenge that hum jaise andar they waise hi bahar hain, uske baad hi aagey sochenge.

6. No I don’t regret not giving up the ticket to finale task for Kishwer. Humara conversation bohot bada hua tha jo edit karke dikhaya. Humne bohot soch samajh ke faisla liya tha…Maine bola tu Rs 15 lakh leke ja main Rs 35 leke aa raha hun...So our strategy worked and we both won. (smiles) 7. Main bhagwaan aur apne Maa-Baap ke siwa kisi se nai darta. Jo darte hain who kuch nai karte.

8. I don’t think Rishabh deserved to win the show. 24 hours mein woh ek ghanta kuch karta tha and rest of the time kuch nahi karta that isliye mujhe lagta hai who winner banne layak nahi hai. Jo 24 main se 20 ghante entertain karta hai, task karta hai ya kuch na kuch karta rehta hai, woh deserving hai aur ismein Rishabh bohot peeche tha.

9. Main har jeet par aur har haar par vishwas rakhta hun, ki aaney wala kal achcha hoga.

10. I was hugely impressed by Salman Khan in Tere Naam. I followed his hair style of side parting and was suspended from school for it. Despite that I shaved my hair like his hairstyle in the second half of the film. I cut my hair on Bigg Boss to express what I feel for him as I may not get to meet him in future.

-IANS

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BEAUTY & ENTERTAINMENT

‘GREAT EXPECTATIONS’ Katrina Kaif, who is starring in filmmaker Abhishek Kapoor’s film “Fitoor”, an adaptation of Charles Dickens’ classic novel “Great Expectations”, says that its story is “relatable” to current topics and “stands on its own”.

“I think more important than being inspired by ‘Great Expectations’ or not being inspired by it, for me it is a relatable story and topic, which talks about many problems these days,” Katrina told IANS in a telephonic interview from Mumbai.

“It’s a really relatable story, probably one of the most relatable stories I can think of to have been adapted... Whether you’ve read the book or don’t care about it, the film stands on its own. It doesn’t need the book to support it. I hope people come into the theatres just based on wanting to give the film a shot,” she added.

The actress also highlights the “social stigmas”, which the story talks about.

“Social stigma is a big thing, the social status as I would put it, which oftentimes comes in love stories, and happens around us because of the nature of our country,” the 32-year-old said.

The actress, who recently launched L’Oreal Paris’s new La Vie En Rose signature collection, says Kapoor has “maintained the integrity” of the original novel.

“Abhishek has maintained the integrity of the story of ‘Great Expectations’. It’s basically about a mother who has been extremely jilted by her lover and has become very bitter. And as a result, she is almost brainwashing and manipulating her daughter and kind of having a wrong way on love and life,” the “Phantom” actress said.

“Maybe in a certain way, she is trying to protect her from the same heartbreak which love can sometimes bring and some way encourage her to take revenge on men in general for the hurt,” she added.

Does the the word “fitoor”, which means passion, hold any personal meaning for Katrina?

“If we talk about ‘fitoor’ and love, then obviously it is just the overwhelming, all-encompassing feeling that becomes the centre to the point of the universe... Love can have that effect on you. When you talk about ‘fitoor’ in relation to the movie, that’s the way I see it,” said the actress, who in her over decade-long stay in Bollywood has climbed up the ladder of success with her varied roles.

She said she is extremely passionate for her work.

“When you talk about passions for other things, then I am definitely very passionate about my work. It’s not just my job, it’s also something that brings me satisfaction. Definitely, there are times when you are tired and have a bad day. But there are many moments when we see the work you do and you feel wonderful,” Katrina added.

A talent that has worked in romantic, comedy and action roles, Katrina says she chooses her roles based on her instinct.

“I have always been very basic and instinctive with the kind of roles I choose. If I like a film, then it sounds like a film I want to be a part of, then I have always gone for it. There hasn’t been a plan or strategy, it’s always been very instinctive,” Katrina said, while adding that she is open to doing films in any “kind of language and good script.”

- By Ankit Sinha, IANS

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APART, ‘FITOOR’ STANDS ON ITS OWN KATRINA KAIF

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

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BEAUTY & ENTERTAINMENT

Actress Kangana Ranaut, who is uninhibited about her bold views, says freedom of speech “can’t be such that it is hurtful to others’ sentiments”.

Asked to comment on the state of freedom of expression in the country, Kangana said: “Freedom of expression cannot be such that it is hurtful to others’ sentiments as we are a country of so many languages, religions and colours.”

“Forget speaking about the country on a public platform, even at home or at your workplace, you should think before you speak. One must understand the power of words.”

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“If it can be perceived in many ways, then please value those ‘many ways’ and come up with the most precise and accurate way to express yourself, so that if you have to go back and evaluate the content of your comment, you should not be in a place where you think that this does not belong to me.”

The National Award winning actress spoke on the sidelines of a screening of “Saala Khadoos” here. She expressed her views when she was asked about freedom of expression in reference to filmmaker Karan Johar’s recent comment that freedom of expression in India “is the biggest

joke in the world” and its “democracy is the second biggest joke”.

Kangana, a National Award winning actress, is also one never to mince her words.

“I get so many backlashes for anything and everything that I say, but that’s okay.

I speak because I don’t want to be a darling or ‘goody shoes’ for all. I always speak my mind and whatever I speak, I know some people love me and for some, I am a bada**,” she said.

On the professional front, the actress is working very hard for Vishal Bhardwaj’s “Rangoon”.

- IANS www.desitoday.ca

BEAUTY & ENTERTAINMENT

“I WAS BORN HERE, I WILL DIE HERE” AAMIR KHAN

Bollywood actor-producer Aamir Khan - who kicked a huge controversy over the intolerance issue last year - said he had no plans to leave India and he can’t live more than two weeks out of the country.

“I love my country, I was born here and I will die here. I have never thought of leaving India and will never take such a step,” Aamir told reporters while celebrating the 10th anniversary event of ‘Rang de Basanti’ here.

“I never said India is intolerant or I want to leave the country... these two things have been said to everyone. So, obviously, people will get hurt and I understand their emotions. I am not surprised they are angry with me. But, there is no truth to this all...,” the 50-yearold actor said.

“I want to clear this; I have never said India is intolerant. Our country is diverse with so many languages, culture... no other country has so much diversity as India and that’s the strength of our country. But, despite this strength, if anybody tries to break us, that hurts me. Let’s not make this country weak. Let’s not spread poison and let’s live together,” he added.

After his comments last November, the actor was widely criticised by many and even slammed on Twitter by colleagues like Anupam Kher and Raveena Tandon.

Khan was recently replaced as the brand ambassador for the ‘Incredible India’ campaign by actors Amitabh Bachchan and Priyanka Chopra.

Aamir blames the media for misquoting him. He said: “I love my country and I’m not able to live more than two weeks out of the country. I get homesick. I was hurt and along with me many people have been hurt because of this misunderstanding. I give this credit to you all (media) because you all have twisted my words. I request you all that please don’t do this.” - IANS www.desitoday.ca

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

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BEAUTY & ENTERTAINMENT

UPCOMING Fitoor

Releasing 12 February, 2016 This story follows a young Kashmiri boy Noor, his muse Firdaus and a mercurial Begum, through love lost and realized over the course of two generations. Thirteen-year-old Noor, an impressionable shikara boy living by the piers of Kashmir’s Dal Lake, is lured into the world of the Begum - the wealthiest woman in town. Young Noor falls in love with the Begum’s daughter, Firdaus - a beautiful child who has been raised to break hearts. Suffering from a broken heart herself, the Begum finds her mark in Noor. Noor begins to obsess over Firdaus, someone who belongs to a world completely different from his. Seasons change and Noor leaves his hometown to move to the city of Delhi to build his career as an artist. He strives to be accepted into the sophisticated social circles that Firdaus is a part of in a quest to win her love, while the Begum plots retribution on their young and innocent love.

Neerja

Releasing 19 February, 2016 This is the story of Neerja Bhanot, a 22 year old part time model, who was the chief flight attendant on a flight that was hijacked by Palestinian extremists. Neerja had escaped an abusive marriage at a very young age and as a life change, decided to become an air hostess. Throughout the horrifying 17-hour situation, Neerja didn’t succumb to her fears and instead she used her courage, wits and compassion to make sure that the passengers were protected, going as far as to hiding the passports of the American passengers. Through her swift thinking and brave actions, she managed to save the lives of 359 passengers and crew on board out of 379, all at the cost of her own life.

Jai Gangaajal

Releasing 4 March, 2016 Gangaajal 2 is the seuqel of 2003 hit movie Gangaajal. Jai Gangaajal is about a female cop, who takes on some powerful and influential men in her district. Jha has started working on the film. It is about today’s dictum of societypolice relationship. ‘Gangaajal’ was more from the heart. This one has all the bizarre things happening around us in reality. The film is not made on a big scale and also has very less characters. It is a concentrated story. In the second installment, Priyanka Chopra will fill her Blackmail co-star’s shoes, as she takes on more corruption in the hinterlands 70

OCT NOV 2015 FEB // MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

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MOVIES Zoolander No. 2

Releasing February 12, 2016 When the world’s most beautiful musical celebrities are systematically assassinated with formerly famous male model Derek Zoolander’s iconic “Blue Steel” look on their face, Interpol recruits Derek and his friend Hansel McDonald to infiltrate a new and different world of high fashion in order to put a stop to it. Meanwhile, Derek’s rival Jacobim Mugatu is set free and is seeking revenge.

Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon: Sword of Destiny

Releasing February 26, 2016 Tells an epic story of lost love, young love, a legendary sword and one last opportunity at redemption, set against breathtaking action in an epic martial arts battle between good and evil that will decide the fate of the Martial World. Donnie Yen starring as Silent Wolf and Michelle Yeoh reprises her role as Yu Shu Lien. The screenplay is based on “Iron Knight, Silver Vase” by Wang Du Lu, book 5 in the “Crane-Iron Pentalogy” series, on which the original “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon” was based.

Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

Releasing 25 March 2016 Fearing the actions of Superman are left unchecked, Batman takes on Superman, while the world wrestles with what kind of a hero it really needs.

With Batman and Superman fighting each other, a new threat, Doomsday, is created by Lex Luthor. It’s up to Superman and Batman to set aside their differences along with Wonder Woman to stop Lex Luthor and Doomsday from destroying Metropolis.

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OCT NOV 2015 FEB // MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

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BEAUTY & ENTERTAINMENT

BoLLYWood inKed For her favourite man in her life, Priyanka Chopra has “Daddy’s little girl” across her wrist Bollywood’s favourite sweetheart, Sushmita Sen has “Aut Viam inveniam aut faciam”, which is a Latin saying that translates to, “I shall either find a way or make my own”.

Fitting for her explosive personality, Alia Bhatt has the word “Pataka” (firecracker) on the nape of her neck

Kangana Ranaut One of the most infamous tattoos in all of Bollywood: Deepika Padukone’s “RK” for her ex-love Ranbir Kapoor. The tattoo, along with their relationship, was from years ago.

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The Tattoos of Your Favourite Actors and Actresses Ajay Devgan shows his devotion to Lord Shiva with this chest tattoo.

Father of the year award definitely goes to Akshay Kumar who, shortly after the birth of his son, had his name inked in large letters onto his upper back.

Saif Ali Khan shows his devotion to his love, Kareena, by having her name inked on his left forearm

The sweet Arjun Kapoor has “Ma” on his wrist in memory of his mother who passed away.

Ranbir has “Awara” on his left wrist to commemorate the 1951 classic film that his grandfather, Raj Kapoor, starred in.

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FEB / MAR 2016 News With A Desi View

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DESI

Around Town

Well-known South Asian businessman Tony Singh of Fruiticana repays the generosity he experienced as new immigrant in 1975. Syrian refugee families in Surrey received free grocery baskets. The food baskets will help 500 Syrian refugees arriving in Surrey over the coming months.

Akali Singh Sikh Society of Vancouver donated $5,013 to Surrey Memorial Hospital Foundation.

Tony Singh, Founder and President of Fruiticana gives away prizes to the winners of the Fruiticana Lohri Lucky Draw Contest 2016. Fruiticana partnered with Brar Sweet Corn Flour and gave away a stroller to Subhpreet Kaur and a gold coin to Jaggit Kaur Grewal.

Defence Minister Harjit Sajjan (MP for Vancouver South) was honoured by Vancouver’s Khalsa Diwan Society-run Ross Street Gurdwara

At the Vancouver Soccer Club’s annual family Christmas and New Year celebration at Vancouver’s Fraserview Hall

Photos by Chandra Bodalia

Desjardins Financial Security Independent Network Annaul Award Ceremony for Top Sells & Staff organized by Perminder Chohan Managing Director of DFSIN at Dhaliwal Banquet Hall, Surrey

Indian Consul General Rajiv K. Chander addressed the Republic Day gathering at the Consulate General in Vancouver. The Consulate General staff and their families posed for a group photo.

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Mamta Foundation’s 7th Annual Event at Dhaliwal Banquet Hall to support sheltered girls in homes called “Unique Home” in Jalandhar City & Jyoti Sarup Kanya Asra Society, Kharar City (near Chandigarh).

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DESI

Around Town

Canada’s Finance Minister Bill Morneau addressed the Surrey Board of Trade on the country’s economy and the federal budget. This was part of the minister’s pre-budget consultations.

“Laadki” A Musical produced by the Gujarati Society of BC received standing ovations

Better at Home Surrey-Whalley’s group social initiative for isolated South Asian Women called Humjoli organized a New Year’s and Lohri celebration. The event organized at Taj Park Banquet Hall was attended byover 100 women with MP Sukh Dhaliwal and MLA Sue Hammell.

Kuri Mundey Di Lohri at Surrey’s Dhaliwal Banquet Hall Chartered professional accountants, and barristers and solicitors had a jolly good time at Surrey’s Bollywood Banquet Hall

At the reception held by the Indian Consulate General on India Republic Day at Vancouver’s Fraserview Hall.

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Everybody had a rocking good time at Rock The 2016 New Year’s Eve Party at Vancouver’s Fraserview Hall FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

75

LIFE & ETC

Lots of

HYPOCRISY in India regarding women

INDO-BRITISH MUSICIAN HARD KAUR Indo-British raptress Taran Kaur Dhillon, popularly known as Hard Kaur, says surviving in a “very male dominated industry” in this country is difficult as there are “too many double standards”.

Launched in 2007, her debut single “Ek glassy” was hot on the charts and also a party favourite for long. It proved that even women could rap with ease and beat men in the genre.

Despite her success story, the genre is still dominated by rappers like Yo Yo Honey Singh, Raftaar and Badshah. So, what keeps most women away from rapping?

“It’s a very male dominated industry and it’s very difficult for girls to get into it and actually maintain to survive. It’s a boys club and there are so many issues to deal with including a lot of sexism. There’s a lot of hypocrisy in India regarding women and what they are able to do.

Too many double standards,” Kaur told IANS in an email interview from London.

Wouldn’t she like to start a label to promote more raptress?

“No thanks! I’ve tried helping girls before and they are never serious about work. Some of them do it for a couple of days and then quit, wasting my time, effort and money. They make stupid excuses to quit like ‘My boyfriend doesn’t want me to do it’ or ‘I can’t handle boys being competition’ or ‘I’m get-

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ting married so I shouldn’t. What will my parents-in-law say?’

“You got to have a thick skin and be very strong to survive in this game,” said the “Move your body” hitmaker.

While she is a pro at it, actress Sonakshi Sinha tried her hand at the genre last month with her first single titled “Aaj mood ishqholic hai”.

“I didn’t like the song that she did, but I think it’s great that she tried and it gives a lot of inspiration to girls out there,” said Kaur, who has unveiled a new single “Aise karte hai party”.

How the catchy number was made is quite interesting!

“It was super fun working on this song.

It’s actually inspired from a time when Sonny Ravan (co-writer) and I met in a club. I was asking the DJ to change the music and he wasn’t listening to me.

“So, Sonny and I thought it would be fun to write a song about what all we do when we ask the DJ to change a track. He came up with the line ‘Are DJ gana band kar’ (DJ stop the song) and we started writing in the club,” said Kaur.

The song’s video features known names like ace choreographer Saroj Khan, actor Punit Issar, actor-host Manish Paul and TV anchor-comedian Cyrus Broacha.

“Times Music came up with the idea of having celebs in the video playing characters, so they asked me to invite as many of my celeb friends for it. I fitted in as many as I could in the 12 hours that we shot.

Everybody was so supportive,” said the former “Jhalak Dikhhla Jaa” contestant.

“Saroj Khan is a legend and it was a brilliant surprise for the dancers. She was one of the judges on (dance reality show) ‘Jhalak Dikhhla Jaa’ when I was in it. She gave me so much love and we’ve stayed friends ever since. I always wanted to work with her and this was the perfect chance,” she added.

It’s not just music that’s keeping her busy these days, the “Patiala House” actress is also looking forward to her next film.

“I’m starring in an upcoming movie, ‘Ticket to Bollywood’, as a villain. Finally, I will get to play a character that I’ve always wanted,” she said.

What about Punjabi movies?

“I love to make music for all types of movies including down south. I love the Punjabi industry as they’ve always given me so much love for my work and as a fellow Punjabi, I would love to do something back for them,” she said.

- By Natalia Ningthoujam, IANS

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77

LIFE & ETC

THE HOUSE I CAN’T FORGET PART : I

The house I was born in, in Moradabad did not only witness my birth, but witnessed the births of my siblings as well. Built of small sized red bricks, it was a large piece of gated property, rented by my grandfather.

In front of the house, on the left hand side, was a high pavilion and big open dirt yard, where he stabled his two horses and parked two Tonga carriages he used to go to work, transport his family around and make a few extra rupees by renting them out.

I do not recall mom ever telling me how many rooms, bathrooms and toilets that house had, but I do remember counting the number of people who lived there, including my paternal great grandfather, grandfather, his three wives (not all at the same time, but one after the other as a result of their deaths), his younger sister, his seven children, my mom and my seven siblings and two live-in servants.

The building had no electricity or running water. We used propane lanterns and clay lamps for light and wells for water.

There were two wells inside the building and four outside for the use of the entire community. Years later, I learned that two of them had to be sealed off because a kid named, Kunno, had tossed kittens in them and the third one was sealed off because a child fell into it.

The fourth one, known as “Jayanti Prasad’s well” was the only one that survived the mayhem, perhaps because it was ritually wedded. Its wife’s wooden statue had been installed right in the wall next to the round

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water hole. I had seen people putting marigold garlands around her neck and praying to it for her husband’s good health and safety. People did not climb the well pavilion with shoes on. They took them off just as they did before they entered temples.

Before I was a year old my extended family had started to disintegrate, as I was told. My great grand father and grand father and three of my siblings had already passed away. Two of my siblings moved to Haridwar to live with my maternal grand parents and mom’s widowed younger sister, leaving mom and dad and two siblings and I to move into a new house. My uncles and my third step grandmother had to find their own places, here and there, though within the same city.

My own recollections of this new house start when I was three years old. This new place was a three-story building, built between on a dead end street, so narrow a Tonga could not pass through. Its outer walls seemed a patch work of modern art; filled of naked spots of the missing plaster, different shaped red and deep brown designs of exposed bricks, once covered under the white washed cement.

The entrance door had a two-panels studded from top to bottom with thick steel nails like the gates of medieval castles. The panels were so heavy small children could not open or shut them. Right behind the left panel was a thick log beam installed in the wall to be pulled out to jam the doors to ensure safety at night.

On the right hand side of the entrance,

there were two latrines for the use of thirty-one adults and teens. Mornings were the busiest time of the day. However, despite the number of people wanting to conclude their business within a small time slot, I never heard people raising their voice over their turn.

Children squatted on open drains out in the street. I was one of them. When I went out to do my thing, I would occasionally find a couple of children already squatting behind each other. It was time to socialize. We conversed, watched each other drop and observed different shapes forming in the flowing drain.

There was this boy, Naval. His favourite morning past time was to fashion coiled snakes by moving his behind. One day he suddenly stood up and screamed, “dekhdekh, ek-dam saanp hai. jaldi dekh, nahin to bah jaagyega.” Look, look, it is a perfect snake. Hurry up or it will flow away.” As girls were not allowed to join us, they were deprived of Naval’s live art exhibitions.

Down below the first floor was an underground large basement (taih-khaanaa). The entrance of this portion was through a renter’s suite, but he kept it locked. Though there was another entrance built in the middle of the stairs between the first and second floors it was too narrow even for a small child to slither through.

This basement was the supply source of all creepy and crawlies like spider, lizards, big white scorpions and centipedes; no snakes.

We were always reminded to shake our shoes

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first before putting out feet in them. I recall several times catching scorpions and holding them prisoners in bottles.

Lizards moving in slow motion in pursuit of crickets or cockroaches, or clinging to the ceiling and crawling up or down a wall could be seen in any part of the building. We always attempted to chase lizards out and away, not because we were afraid of them, but because we considered their fall on our body a bad omen. I recall I must be about seven years old, when I, performing my monthly assignment of sweeping the forty seven stairs, accidentally stepped on a lizard and severed its tail. It jumped all over the steps. I had recurring nightmares about that tail jumping and the lizard gnawing at my feet.

Other creatures that freely roamed around were mice. Leaving food open, even for a moment, was risky. Either it would go missing or you would see their teeth impressions all over it. Every night we would set a mouse-cage with a piece of roti-bread, and more often than not in the morning, would find a big fat mouse sitting in it looking up pleading with its shiny round eyes, “Let me out. Let me out,” though there were times when we would neither find a mouse nor the piece of bait in the cage. In that case, they were either too smart to be trapped or too tiny for the bars to hold them in.

Despite occasional failed attempts, trapping a mouse was still easier than finding a secret location to release it. Nobody would let you liberate it near his home, especially when people frequented the street, or some old man sat in front of his house during the day, smoking his hookah pipe and watching every passer by. And because the mouse is considered the transportation of the elephant headed god Ganesha, we could not let a cat have it either. Many times I had to return home with the prisoner still in the cage.

There was no indication that our building was haunted or that monsters lived down below in the basement, yet there was no shortage of fear mongering in their name.

They were mothers’ convenient allies used to control their young ones. Mothers would threaten their kids, when they did not do exactly what they wanted, “Hurry up. Finish your food or the monsters will come and take it away….Stop crying and go to bed or the monsters will take you away.” These monsters were always males, never females.

Females were witches, who were never invoked to frighten children. They were used only to describe the demeanour of female

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children or their unkempt look.

Our living accommodations were forty seven stairs up on the third floor. Whenever I went up or down those steps, I counted and recounted them as though by counting them again and again they would magically become lesser. They remained 47, until I grew up and started going up or down two steps at a time!!

Of the three rooms we had, two of them had cement roofs. The third one had a tin roof. During summer months, these rooms heated up like ovens, especially the one with tin roof. Every day, mom would remind me, “It is going to be a hot day. Don’t go out. Stay inside. Not only were those afternoons hot, they were long, lonely and much too quiet.

The only sound I recall I would hear, occasionally, were the cries of sunbathing eagles flying high in the sky. However, the nights were divine. While we rested on our string cots under clear moonlit skies, enjoyed an occasional breeze and counted the twinkling stars, the first floor renters spent their nights turning and tossing and fighting mosquitoes and offensive nearby toilet odour.

Another third floor blessing was the lovely monsoon season. By the end of June, dark clouds would start moving in with thunder and lightning and rain. A smell you would want to preserve in bottles would rise from the sun baked and rain drenched brick walls and cement floors, inviting to perform a rain dance, naked. But mom, rather than watching the lightning, or trying to smell the drenched brick perfume, or listening to the rain music, would get busy placing buckets and all big and small pots under the edge of the corrugated tin roof, collecting Indra’s bounty for bathing, washing and doing dishes.

Seven decades have gone by yet the memories of those third floor winters, when the nights were long and dark and biting cold are still fresh. Those were the nights when I would snuggle up to mom’s tummy for warmth. She did not mind that encroachment. What she did not like was listening to the sound of me grinding my teeth. One day she warned me, “If you did not stop grinding your teeth I would fill your mouth with sand.” I knew it was an empty threat, but once she did slap me while I was deep asleep.

The upside of that punishment for doing something I had no control over turned out pretty rewarding. Dad invited me to sleep with him. His shelter was cushier than mom’s. I accepted his offer, and from then on

I slept with him, safely, until I got my own bed.

Later, when my eldest brother was about to get married, mom and dad vacated the tin roofed room on the third floor and rented two more rooms on the second floor. One of them was bigger. It had a cement floor, but the other was smaller with dirt floor. Mom used the bigger one as bedroom, living room, prayer room and storeroom, and the smaller one as kitchen. Both of them had attics to store the type of stuff you might call, “younever-know-when-you-might-need-it”.

There was a two-foot by two-foot shelf built inside the wall right under the attic in the kitchen, where dad stored a dark brown wax jar of his special brand of pickles with onions, which were otherwise absolutely forbidden in mom’s cooking. One day, whitewashing the kitchen, mom discovered a deep pocket inside the pickle shelf. She had heard that builders sometimes build secret pockets within walls to hide valuables. Curiously she put her hand in it and found a small pitcher embedded inside. She moved her hand further down and felt lumps of something in the bottom. She grabbed a fistful of those lumps and pulled her hand out. When she looked at what she was holding in her fist she was gravely disappointed, but decided to have fun with dad.

In the evening, when dad returned from his store mom asked, “You know what I discovered today?”

“What did you discover?” asked dad with curiosity. “A bank full of gold; perhaps left behind by the first owner or renter of this house,” replied mom.

Dad got excited and wanted to know more about this bank and the gold.

But, as the expression goes: jhoot ke pair nahi hote; lies have no legs, mom’s story collapsed as soon as dad asked her to show him the gold. But when she shared the same story with her friends they had a different take. They said, “When your luck is against you, even solid gold turns into coal.” implying that those coal pieces could have been nuggets of gold.

By Dr Suresh Kurl Dr. Suresh Kurl is a former university professor; a retired Registrar of the BC Benefits Appeal Board and a former Member of the National Parole Board.

FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

79

LIFE & ETC

Does

CHICKEN TIKKA

have a nationality?

Food has the power to bring enemies together and this time it’s the lip-smacking appetizer, the chicken tikka, that has managed to bind neighbouring Asian countries India and Pakistan here together.

Mohit Bhargava from India and Shamoun Bhatti from Pakistan, chefs at Dubai’s seven-star Burj Al Arab hotel, say they “work like brothers” and love to serve the best of their countries’ delicacies to their consumers who don’t inquire about the

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FEB / MAR 2016 News With A DEsi View

recipes’ nationality.

For its authentic Arabic cuisine or Far East Asian or Modern European dishes, the hotel sources ingredients from across the globe, says 34-year-old Bhatti from Karachi.

“Some of the spices and herbs come from India and Pakistan, as we don’t find them here. You will be amazed to know that many people term Pakistani dishes as Indian food here and I feel proud. I don’t think chicken tikka has any nationality. You wonder if it is from India or Pakistan? I feel it’s chicken tikka, that’s it,” he told this visiting IANS correspondent, who was invited to witness the grandeur of Burj Al Arab during the ongoing Dubai shopping festival.

The Bab al Yam restaurant in the hotel, where he showed some of the food items prepared by him, has a contemporary and sophisticated concept with floor-toceiling windows offering stunning views, breathtaking spacious terrace and plush shisha (hookah) lounges.

“I think it’s not the people but the governments that are making a hue and cry.

There are so many politicians and all of them have their own reason for hating each other. Even in the recent Pathankot episode, Indians and Pakistanis were blaming each other. I feel this type of thing creates bad relations,” says Bhatti.

While he shifted to Dubai 10 years back for work, 32-year-old Bhargava, who hails from Lucknow, moved to the United Arab Emirates city with his wife two and a half years back. www.desitoday.ca

“We work like brothers and it’s always good to have someone around who understands your language,” said the chef while giving a pat on the shoulder of his Pakistani counterpart.

He also pointed out how Dubai has opened up for Indians, especially in the food sector.

“It’s a home away from home. People love Indian food here, especially chicken tikka masala that has become universal.

Some of the other dishes in demand are lamb rogan josh, biryani and, of course, masala dosa,” he said, pointing out how Indian restaurants are doing well in Dubai.

“There are many local restaurants which are coming in. Moti Mahal and Raaga are here. We also have a new restaurant in Taj. There is one at Shereton by chef Vikas Khanna called Junoon, then we have chef Vineet Bahl’s restaurant Indego. So, you have a large choice where you want to dine,” he informed.

The distinctive sail-shaped silhouette of Burj Al Arab is more than just a stunning hotel, it is a symbol of modern Dubai.

Repeatedly voted the world’s most luxurious hotel, the magnificent destination offers people the finest service and facilities throughout - right down to an optional chauffeur-driven Rolls-Royce.

Hence, it won’t be wrong to say that it’s the hot spot for all the Bollywood, Hollywood and other A-list celebrities.

It boasts of serving celebrities like Hollywood actor Vin Diesel during the shooting of “Furious 7” in Dubai, southern star Mahesh Babu with his family and tennis legend Roger Federer.

Talking about a loyal customer, Bhargava said: “There is one Russian lady who is very regular here and she always asks me about Indian food. She has a liking for different cuisines.”

Niamh Keohan, director of marketing and PR for Burj Al Arab, said hiring an Indian and a Pakistani together was not a “well planned strategy” but people are very open to all the “spicy foods” that India is known for.

“I feel the authorities wanted people with different nationalities and hence they were hired. People love Indian food and that’s why many Indian restaurants are opening up here,” she told IANS.

By Nivedita Nivedita’s visit to the UAE is at the invitation of Dubai’s Department of Tourism and Commerce Marketing.

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LIFE & ETC

KNOW WHAT YOUR STAR SAYS

HOROSCOPE FEB-2016 WITH PANDIT SRI SRI RAM SURREY WALE CAPRICORN (Dec 22- Jan 19)

This month may be a manifestation of uncontrollable desire to radically something in itself to change, whether it is the appearance or internal quality. Stars recommend in any time no doubt, but only to be active in this area, as any changes will attract the attention and admiration from others, which are so eager to Capricorns.

AQUARIUS

(Jan 20-Feb 18)

Horoscope recommends this month until the end to defend his point of view on the work and always offer original ideas for the development of the company. It will be approved by management and Aquarius will help get the respect and approval of his colleagues.

February will be the month of the �inancial wellbeing and success. But the stars have warned of possible minor troubles.

PISCES

(Feb 19-Mar 20)

This month will require representatives of Pisces maximum concentration, moderation and endurance. Safely month would be only under the condition that the controlling their emotions, Pisces will be able to go through all the dif�iculties with ease and to avoid losses. During this period, Star Pisces promise come true all plans, and many close friends will agree to help.

ARIES

(Mar 21 - Apr 19)

dream, soon it will grow into a life purpose and when will make the necessary efforts, the result will not take long.

TAURUS

(Apr 20 - May 20

Taurus is recommended to be sociable, which will make useful contacts that will be useful in the near future. The whole month will bring the owner of this zodiac sign a lot of positive emotions and impressions.

February will be generous for the bulls to pleasant surprises and unexpected meetings with old friends, with whom for a long time still can not manage to meet.

GEMINI

(May 21 - June 21)

Star Twins recommend not to overload yourself and once again afford to be lazy, it will only bene�it them. Horoscope Gemini warns about the possibility to get involved in the con�lict. Unwittingly, the representatives of this zodiac sign can hurt the feelings of people around them, so the light is urged to be restrained in their emotions.

CANCER

(June 22-July 22)

Stars strongly recommend cancers express their inherent perseverance and strength of character. In this case, the representatives of this zodiac sign can easily cope with their tasks. In general, the whole Cancers will have good luck, especially in the sphere of business.

LEO

You will not leave any chance for a moment, the stars predict dizzying success in business. In this connection, it is recommended to go ahead and not give in to the slightest obstacles. Aries can be safely plan and

(July 23-Aug 22)

Perhaps Lions realize that not meet the expectations of some people, but do not dwell on this point, even if it’s

someone from the family. Stars strongly recommended to be themselves and not try to change yourself in order to please others. Also born under the sign of Leo should not rush things, let things go on as usual, and the speeding up of cases will have an unfavorable outcome.

VIRGO

(Aug 23-Sept 22)

Stars recommend Virgo as often as possible to show their perseverance, this will help avoid manipulation by others, and show the power of nature. You will �ind that once lost, and perhaps already not expecting to get it back. All the goals that Virgin have set ourselves, whether they are global or ordinary, everything will certainly be achieved, albeit not in the near future, but just wait a year two and the result was not long in coming.

LIBRA

(Sept 23-Oct 22)

Perhaps in recent years Libra noted that external factors could shake their con�idence in their chosen path. Stars do recommend a small pause in the way and have a good think about it, to banish all doubts and go through selected. Let some adversity, gets in the way of Libra, no longer be able to knock them from their intended path.

SCORPIO

(Oct 23-Nov 21)

Stars strongly recommend irascible scorpions, most to keep yourself in their hands, so they are not drifting on turning in unusual and stressful situation, try to �ind the loopholes and come out unscathed. Let occur in relations with people his best qualities. After all, so Scorpios like to make a lasting impression on new acquaintances. Speaking of new friends, a lot of unexpected shining promise dating, so try to work on them.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22-Dec 21)

Stars recommend to try not to fall into con�licts and maximize smooth corners. Thus Sagittarians can protect itself from enemies who are trying to provoke them.

Listen to your feelings, they do not in any way disappoint. Sagittarius must show their perseverance in the professional sphere, especially if they are unsure of their decisions, it is absolutely not necessary to be silent and hide their brilliant ideas.

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