NICOLE FARADAY OCTOBER 2017
“Bad Girls helped me accept my sexuality”
EUROPE'S LEADING MAGAZINE FOR LESBIANS & BI WOMEN
THE WEDDING ISSUE
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CELESBIAN WEDDINGS
Oodles of inspo from your fave couples
JANE HILL Her most memorable interview
Ellen Page
“ I had to come out – even if it meant I would never work again”
Below Her Mouth We speak to the stars of the hit lesbian film
Suits you!
Bridal fashion for the gentlewoman
| WELCOME |
Contents On the cover
26
UP FRONT
VIEWS
FEATURES
06 08 10
18 20 21 22 23 24
26 34 38 42 44 48 50
DICTUM
A defence of civil partnerships from DIVA editor Carrie Lyell
YOUR SHOUT
You tell us what you think of DIVA
NEWS
This month’s round-up from OutNews Global
MS & MX
Will McCreath on planning a non-binary wedding
JANE HILL
A memorable last column for DIVA
REETA LOI
Leading Gaysians.org to love and Pride
DIATRIBE
CERIAN JENKINS
TRENDS
12 13 14 16
Time to trash tradition says Nadia Huq Single and ready to mingle? Read this...
ELEANOR MARGOLIS
VOICES
#WeStandWithMunroe
Meet my plus one
ELLEN PAGE
“Everything is different now...”
READER WEDDING
Photographer Anete Lūsiņa shares snaps from a special day
FOUR WEDDINGS
Meet the couple who got married four times
HOW TO GET MARRIED A step-by-step guide
CELESBIAN WEDDINGS Oodles of inspo from our fave couples
WIN YOUR WEDDING Win a dream day worth £15,000
HAPPY EVER AFTER?
PICK’N’MIX
Stuff that caught DIVA’s eye this month
One cynic’s search for long-lasting love
WHY WE LOVE
Raindance’s eclectic LGBT stories
SHE SAID
12
Notable quotables from women to listen to
16
54
64
66 3
| WELCOME |
ON THE COVER
CULTURE
54 56 57 58
VERONICA FEARON Writing and women in London’s underworld
BOOK REVIEWS
Top reads from our new books editor Kaite Welsh
FILM REVIEWS
DIVA’s lowdown on the hottest new releases
60 62 64
MUSIC REVIEWS
Heather Peace’s musical loves of the month
Photography Maarten de Boer
NICOLE FARADAY
“Bad Girls helped me accept my sexuality”
TV REVIEWS
It’s all happening on the small screen this month
BELOW HER MOUTH Sexy, original and unwaveringly lesbian
COMMUNITY
66
LIVING HISTORY
“Older generations are our strongest link to the future”
TRAVEL
78 82 83
A LIFE-CHANGING RIDE Travelling along the Trans-Siberian railway
RAINBOW HONEYMOONS Our top five places to explore with the lady you love
FIRST CLASS
Make the most of your holidays with DIVA’s travel tips
WOMEN ON TOP
LIFESTYLE
72 76
86 88 92 95 98
LESBIAN PAGE-TURNERS Author Clare Lydon on the lesfic success story
WHAT’S IT LIKE TO BE A... Wedding photograper? We find out with Shen Salih
DIARY
DIVA’s monthly pick of the best events
WEDDING FASHION Fix up, look sharp!
SUITED AND BOOTED Getting hitched? Do it in style
HOROSCOPE
Throughout the issue you will see this symbol, which indicates that there is digital content available related to that particular feature. You will be able to access this complementary content when you purchase our digital edition from divadigital.co.uk or directly through the DIVA branded app, available on the App Store, Google Play, Kindle Newsstand and Windows Store. (Please note that additional content may not be available via all of our third-part digital suppliers. However, buying the issue using one of the methods above will give you access to this content.)
Michele Knight reads your stars
CROSSWORD
Test yourself with our cunning crossword
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| WELCOME |
DICTUM
Editor Carrie Lyell Deputy editor Roxy Bourdillon Staff writer Danielle Mustarde Sub-editor Ellen Tout Designer Fernando Safont Music editor Heather Peace Books editor Kaite Welsh Travel editor Bella Qvist Big thanks to: Emma Joanne, Nikki Aslatt, Merryn Johns, Emily Bashforth
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CELEBRATING THE REAL THING In March 2012, my wife Sarah and I had our civil partnership. It’s been a glorious five and a half years, full of laughs and adventures and arguments over the pronunciation of the word “almond”, but if I had a pound for every time someone has asked since when we were going to “upgrade”, we’d be able to afford another one. We tell them all the same thing – we’ve no plans to convert to a marriage – and each time are met with the same confused look. Why wouldn’t we want the real thing? The thing is, we feel like we have the real thing. Our wedding at The Caves in Edinburgh was better than I ever could have imagined, and when our celebrant declared us partners for life and we walked hand in hand down the aisle to Nothing’s Gonna Stop Us Now by Starship, it didn’t feel like second best. It felt perfect. I know ours is not the most popular opinion – the number of couples entering into civil partnerships in Scotland, England and Wales has 6 OCTOBER 2017
fallen dramatically since the introduction of same-sex marriage three years ago, evidence that most couples do want “the real thing”. But civil partnership, to us, is a modern, egalitarian institution that doesn’t carry the same baggage that marriage does. We get (most of) the benefits of being married without having to sign up to the things we don’t believe in. It might not be for everyone, but it works for us. Whether you and your partner choose a marriage or civil partnership – or not to have your relationship legally recognised at all – I hope you enjoy this, our wedding issue, and that you and your partner are as happy as me and Sarah are. After all, the piece of paper we sign and the words we use to describe each other aren’t really important. What matters is that she’s my fave. Even if she does say almond weird. Carrie Lyell
carrie@divamag.co.uk @Seej
If you need a back issue to complete your set, email fiona@divamag.co.uk. If you have difficulty reading the printed word, you can get DIVA on audio cassette on subscription. Contact Feminist Audio Books on 0161 273 8038 or email books@feministaudiobooks.org.uk THE NOVEMBER ISSUE OF DIVA IS ON SALE FROM 20 OCTOBER (DIGITAL) AND 26 OCTOBER (PRINT). Postal address DIVA, Twin Media Group, Room 32, Spectrum House, 32-34 Gordon House Road, London NW5 1LP Email editorial@divamag.co.uk Website divamag.co.uk Newstrade distribution Select Publisher Services Ltd, 62 Wimbourn Road, Bournemouth, Dorset, BH3 7AR Distribution help steve@magazineworkshop.co.uk Printed in UK by CPUK Print Publishing (cp-uk.co.uk) PUBLISHED BY TWIN MEDIA GROUP LTD CEO Linda Riley
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| MAIL | YOUR SHOUT |
Meet Nancy snd Stanley who joined us in March and May of this year. They were supposed to be five weeks apart but Nancy’s early arrival made them the closest siblings born in the UK to a same-sex couple. People say we were crazy, and to be honest they aren’t wrong. Our simple structured lives have been completely upturned – but 100% for the better. We’ve never been so hectic, so tired, or so in love!
CHLOE & CASSIE DITCH THE LABEL Well done Nadia Huq in presenting a balanced viewpoint (The Confabulation, August). It is encouraging for us femmes within the spectrum of LGBTQ+ to read that there are women out there who just want to be liberated from the identity label.
YOUR SHOUT
DOUBLE LOVE, DOUBLE SMILES AND DOUBLE NAPPIES!
@DIVAmagazine @Rita_Gilda Wow @sophieannaward looking amazing in the new @DIVAmagazine #HairEnvy @OmaghDeery Been a fan of #sophieannaward since Village Affair days.. luv her strength.. coming out not easy xx @ajones_ptp Fab to see complimentary copies of @DIVAmagazine in the #VIP clubhouse @ManchesterPride this weekend featuring the lovely @sophieannaward @JoanFanForever I absolutely love @sophieannaward, she is an incredibly wonderful and talented actress. #MyInspiration @emma_shone It is still rather awkward when I go Tesco and the woman who flirted with me one time when I bought @DIVAmagazine serves me!
8 OCTOBER 2017
WRITE TO US letters@divamag.co.uk
or use the old-fashioned method and drop us a line at
DIVA MAGAZINE Spectrum House, Room 32 32-34 Gordon House Road London NW5 1LP United Kingdom
Nadia’s column was music to my ears. Should our attempts (in my own case, increasingly difficult since turning 60) to find that soulmate (however “out” we may or may not be) be further thwarted by trying to prove that we fulfil all the desired criteria of a specific sub-category within the overarching LGBTQ+ label? Single for almost four years, it’s difficult and daunting enough to meet like-minded femmes within the sub-category of lesbian/bi. “Specialist” dating sites hold a degree of optimism and can no doubt present successes for some. I am somewhat sceptical – a flurry of replies that on the face of it seem promising, but often result in the classic one-liner: “Nice to have met you but I found
there was no instant chemistry”. I am not blessed with extraordinary looks, but like most have my own share of beauty imperfections that make us ordinary. Am I overly old fashioned in thinking that seeking perfection in another instantly is not practically viable? Rather, the journey to finding longer term connectivity often progresses slowly and can over time yield a truly wonderful and fulfilling coupling. And where – for those of us on the wrong side of 55, but enticingly eligible – do we find like-minded souls to share that cup of coffee or maybe a glass of vino? So, like Nadia, I too am a human and would like to date women (again), but crikey, where do you start?
@J4ye79 When you pick your @DIVAmagazine up and @lspraggan and @ge0rgie_gordon are in it – makes my day xxx @sophiearmishaw Love this feature in @DIVAmagazine – “Queer Musicals”. I would so go and see all of them especially Mamma Queer and Lez Girls... so inspired!
@nellylel Perfect start to my day off!! Feet up, brew ready and new @DIVAmagazine #mellowmondaymorning @KristyDaniels_ Thank you @CerianJenkins for the extremely relatable article ‘Be your own kind of beautiful’ about body positivity in @DIVAmagazine this month
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CAN YOU HELP?
I’m a PhD student in Germany and need your help. For my thesis at the University of Freiburg I’m comparing German and British lesbian periodicals and their respective developments. I’m urgently looking for DIVA issues 3-5, 8, 11, 14, 15 and 36. I’d be happy to buy these magazines from you, but would also be willing to return them when I’ve studied them. If you can help, please e-mail Stefanie at staffage@gmx.de. Thank you! Opinions expressed by correspondents and contributors do not necessarily reflect the views of the editors of DIVA magazine or its publishers. Letters may be edited for length and clarity.
COME OUT SUPPORTING. The fight for equality is far from over. Whatever you do and however you do it, it’s time to come out in support of LGBT. Join us. Search #ComeOutForLGBT.
| NEWS ROUND-UP |
In case you missed it... COUPLE GIVEN “LESBIAN” RECEIPT Belinda Mulcahy and her partner Jo James were shocked when, while staying at a holiday resort in North Wales, a barman handed them a receipt with the word “lesbians” printed on it. Jo told DIVA: “I don’t know what upon earth possessed the staff member a) to write it and b) to hand me the receipt with it on.” The couple complained to the bar manager, who tried to appease them with free drinks, and attempted to take the receipt from them. A spokesperson for the resort, Hafan y Môr, told DIVA that the staff member had been disciplined.
GMB ACCUSED OF GIVING PLATFORM TO HOMOPHOBIA ITV’s Good Morning Britain has been criticised for airing an interview with Dr Michael Davidson, an advocate for gay conversion therapy, who calls homosexuality an “aberration” and a “maladjustment”. Many viewers were angry that the programme deemed it appropriate to give a mouthpiece to this kind of homophobia on national television. Sophie Ward tweeted: “I hoped we had got beyond the damaging, bullying and dangerous tactics of ‘debating’ our ‘cure’”, and Stonewall CEO Ruth Hunt was equally appalled: ”I’m increasingly thinking that @stonewalluk needs an early morning crew just to respond and counteract early morning ITV sanctioned hate.” PinkNews reported that within an hour, OfCom had received over 100 complaints.
A FOND FAREWELL TO “FEARLESS AND FUN” LIZ MACKEAN Broadcaster Liz MacKean has passed away from a stroke at the age of 52. The investigative journalist helped to reveal Jimmy Savile’s widespread child abuse and in 2013 made Hunted for Channel 4, an exposé of the Russian gangs who pursue gay men for sport. She was named Journalist of the Year in 2014 and Journalist of the Decade in 2015 by LGBT charity Stonewall. Her former colleagues at Newsnight created a moving tribute, describing her as “fearless and fun”. Liz leaves behind her wife and their two children.
BILLIE PIPER SHIPS ROSE AND THE NEW DOC Former Doctor Who star Billie Piper has opened up about how her character Rose Tyler would have felt working with a female Doctor. She delighted audience members at Canadian fan convention Fan Expo when she revealed that she believed Rose would still have been in love with Jodie Whittaker’s Doctor. She reaffirmed this by retweeting an Attitude magazine article covering her comments, adding “Yehhhh she would… Jodie’s a babe.”
SUSAN CALMAN LIMBERS UP FOR STRICTLY
Join the conversation on Twitter @outnewsglobal 10 OCTOBER 2017
Former DIVA columnist, stand-up comedian and TV presenter Susan Calman is taking part in the 15th series of Strictly Come Dancing. Following the announcement, Calman joked online about the fact that she hadn’t worn heels or a dress since she was a teenager, and hadn’t danced with a man in over 10 years. When the cast photos were revealed, showing the contestants in glitzy ballroom dancing outfits, she shared her mother’s touching response, tweeting: “Sent my Mum my official Strictly photo. She said I looked beautiful. I had a bit of a cry. A happy cry.”
WORDS ROXY BOURDILLON PHOTOS CREATIVE COMMONS, STEVE ULLATHORNE
MONTHLY NEWS ROUNDUP BROUGHT TO YOU BY OUTNEWS GLOBAL
12
VOICES
TRENDS
#WeStandWithMunroe
13
PICK’N’MIX
Stuff that caught DIVA’s eye this month
14
WHY WE LOVE
Raindance’s eclectic LGBT stories
14
16
SHE SAID
Notable quotables from women to listen to
Bruce LaBruce’s controversial feature film
11
| TRENDS | VOICES |
MUNROE BERGDORF This month we’re standing in solidarity with Munroe Bergdorf after she was fired by L’Oréal for a Facebook post challenging racism and white supremacy. Bergdorf, a black queer trans woman, had been hired by the cosmetics giant to take part in their True Match campaign, but was sacked days later following an inflammatory article in the Daily Mail. What came next was weeks of death threats and a “general bombardment” of abuse that left the model, activist and DJ paralysed with fear. “The most ridiculous thing is that you call out racism and they respond with more racism,” she told the Guardian. “It just doesn’t make sense.” But Bergdorf did not cower; she did not hide. Instead, she stood up to those who sought to patronise, gaslight and abuse, and in doing so challenged the hypocrisy of those corporates who want to cash in on diversity without actually doing anything about, you know, diversity. #WeStandWithMunroe
CELEBRITY
tweets @HARTO
Texans have been kind to each other and stronger together. Respect. #HarveyRelief @MARGARETCHO
Can’t lean into #NationalRelaxationDay when there are literal Nazis running amok, killing people, ruining tikitorch fortunes and what not
12 OCTOBER 2017
@CLAREBALDING
Well done New Zealand. Too strong. Well played England - you fought to the end. Terrific match #WeartheRose #WomensWorldCup2017
@SUSANCALMAN
I haven’t worn heels or a dress since I was 17. Haven’t danced with a man in over a decade. Strictly, I’m ready. #WhoLeads? #CalmanCanCanCan @HALSEY
Love is a hell of a drug
@SANDITOKSVIG
#GBBO2017 takes the biscuit tonight... don’t mind if I do. 8pm ch 4. Wave your lady fingers about
@ROXETERARIBBONS
I WAS DRINKING WINE AND I DRANK A FUCKING MOTH
@LAURENJAUREGUI
My favourite part of @GameOfThrones is how many bad ass, brilliantly intelligent women have bold roles of power, control & bravery. I <3 it
MEDIAWATCH with Carrie Lyell
IN THE PUBLIC INTEREST?
Earlier this month I was invited on LBC radio to talk about former Scottish Labour leader Kezia Dugdale’s allegation that she was outed by a journalist against her wishes. Dugdale made the claims (which have been refuted) on the Victoria Derbyshire programme, telling Hannah Bardell MP that she asked journalist Mary Riddell not to talk about her sexuality, but that her requests were ignored. As a lesbian journalist, I was happy to talk about the issue on Nick Ferrari’s programme. But it struck me that there’s not really a debate here. After all, few would argue that outing Dugdale was in the public interest. Responding to the story, LBC listeners were on the whole in the “who cares” camp. It’s not a story, they say, because whose business is it anyway? Well, I’m not sure I agree. Visibility is hella important and my little gay heart skips a beat whenever anyone goes public. The issue here isn’t whether or not to report on a person’s sexuality; it’s that everyone’s story is different, and while we might speculate about the reasons someone might not choose to talk about it, we don’t really know their story. So it wasn’t wrong for the journalist to ask, but if Dugdale didn’t want to talk about it her wishes should have been respected. Coming out – or not – is deeply personal. It has to be up to the individual to set their own narrative and tell their own story in their own time. Just as it wasn’t right for my mother to tell my grandparents I was a raging homo, neither was it right for Dugdale to be outed before she was ready, as she claims she was. For the record, while it’s not how I would have chosen to tell them, it all worked out alright for me with my grandparents in the end. I hope Kezia can one day say the same. @Seej
PHOTO SAM SHAW
PERSON OF THE MONTH
| TRENDS | PICK’N’MIX |
2 S AY
HELLO
TO
OUR
HELLO
L AT E S T
S AY TO
OBSESSIONS
ecial #WeddingSp
OUR L AT E S T
WORDS ROXY BOURDILLON
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3 4
OBSESSIONS
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YOU KNOW THE SAYING: SOMETHING OLD, SOMETHING NEW, SOMETHING BORROWED, SOMETHING SUPER GAY…
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HOUSE OF OLLICHON
2 3
CAKE TOPPER
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PHOTOBOOTH SIGNS
Rock a bridal jumpsuit for a wedding look that’s as unique as you are. houseofollichon.co.uk, £820
Teeny tiny mini-mes for lego-loving lez/bi women. etsy.com/uk/shop/Mylegoideas, £20.89
LESBIHEN BRACELETS Show off your #BridePride with matching rainbow wristbands. etsy.com/uk/shop/MartyMcColgan, £2
Must-have props for all those Big Day selfies. etsy.com/uk/shop/YouGrewPrintables, £6
5 6
MATCHING PILLOWS
7
WEDDING ARTWORK
Ideal for a spot of post-honeymoon spooning. etsy.com/uk/shop/CreativePillowLV, £23.74
COMPATIBLE CARDS Totes adorbs and guaranteed to make the brides’ smiles even wider. compatiblecards.com, £2.80
Personalised word art to celebrate your love story. etsy.com/uk/shop/AliChappellUK, £48
For more fab wedding fashion, turn to page 88 13
| TRENDS | WHY WE LOVE | THIS YEAR’S FESTIVAL IS PACKED FULL OF ECLECTIC LGBT STORIES, AS CARRIE LYELL FINDS OUT
More information on p4 divadigital.co.uk
Over the last 25 years, Raindance has made a name for itself as one of the leading independent film festivals in the world, showcasing some of the most groundbreaking and memorable stories. Conceived by Elliot Grove in 1992, it aimed to be the voice of British filmmaking, going on to screen and premiere many iconic titles, including What’s Eating Gilbert Grape, Memento and Pulp Fiction. For the queer cinephile, this year’s festival looks set to be the best yet with an impressive LGBT strand including the UK premiere of Bruce LaBruce’s controversial feature The Misandrists about a secret cell of feminist terrorists on a mission to overthrow the patriarchy. And the international premiere of Becks, following a Brooklyn musician forced to move back to the midwest after breaking up with her girlfriend. Directed by Elizabeth Rohrbaugh and Daniel Powell, and inspired by the life of singer-songwriter Alyssa Robbins, this engaging movie musical stars Tonyaward winner Lena Hall, American Beauty’s Mena Suvari, Christine Lahti (Hawaii Five-O, The Good Wife) and actress and musician Hayley Kiyoko. Here are three other LGBT films from this year’s festival that shouldn’t be missed:
Telling stories: (top to bottom) The Joneses, Mist and Rebels On Pointe
Why we love...
Raindance 14 OCTOBER 2017
THE JONESES In this 80-minute documentary, director Moby Longinotto takes us to “bible belt” Mississippi to meet Jheri Jones, a 74-year-old trans divorcee attempting to rebuild her relationship with her two sons following years of estrangement. Now living with her family again, Jones embarks on a journey to reveal herself to her grandchildren while Trevor, her son, faces a voyage of his own.
MIST Writer and actress Sofia Espinosa stars in Mist as Martina, a woman feeling trapped in Mexico City. Her sense of entrapment and confusion only grow when she falls pregnant and, at a loss, Martina flies to Berlin in search of her baby’s father. But what should be a straightforward trip ends up revealing much more about her own identity than she expected.
REBELS ON POINTE Directed by Bobbi Jo Hart, Rebels On Pointe is a documentary celebrating notorious drag ballet company Les Ballets Trockadero. Founded in New York in 1974, just five years after the Stonewall riots, this film is a fascinating insight into the world of the men who kick-started a revolution in ballet pumps and went on to become an international sensation. Slay queens!
Raindance Film Festival runs until Sunday 1 October. For tickets and more information, visit raindance.org/festival
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| TRENDS | SHE SAID |
I’M GLAD, BUT I’M ANGRY
SHE
SAID
“I am overwhelmed with mixed feelings. Glad that I am safe, and angry. I’m angry knowing that there are other LGBTI people seeking asylum facing the same fear of deportation that I had just overcome.” Nigerian LGBT rights activist Aderonke Apata speaking to DIVA about finally winning her UK asylum claim after a 13-year battle
16 OCTOBER 2017
SHUNNED FOR MY SEXUALITY
“I went into a severe depression, started seeing a therapist and had to go on antidepressants for the first time in my life. It was scary and lonely.” Ellen DeGeneres opening up about being bullied after coming out in Hollywood, speaking to Good Housekeeping magazine
NOTABLE QUOTABLES SELECTED BY ROXY BOURDILLON
REPRESENTATION AND RESPONSIBILITY
“I’ve always felt a responsibility to portray Carmilla in a positive light. Representation has always been important to me.” Natasha Negovanlis talking about her role in the upcoming Carmilla Movie at Fan Expo in Canada
“I was just stunned... It was uncomfortable. I think it was typical, talking to girlfriends, and I’ve been in therapy for years to just have somebody to talk to about life.” Stand-up comic Tig Notaro discussing her experience of being sexually harassed at work in an interview with Time magazine
PHOTOS CREATIVE COMMONS
THE SHOCKING REALITY
20
JANE HILL
VIEWS
A memorable last column for DIVA
21
REETA LOI
Leading Gaysians.org to love and Pride
23
CERIAN JENKINS Single and ready to mingle? Read this...
24
ELEANOR MARGOLIS
Meet my plus one
22
LETâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S GIVE TRADITION THE FINGER...
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| VIEWS | MY NON-BINARY WEDDING |
My non-binary wedding HOW DIFFICULT IS PLANNING A WEDDING WHEN YOU’RE NON-BINARY? “ENBY” WILL MCCREATH GIVES DIVA A PEEK AT THEIR MOOD BOARD
“I challenge you to find Ms & Mx on a cake topper...” 18 OCTOBER 2017
My partner Bexx and I got engaged in May last year and since then I’ve immersed myself in wedding planning – wedding fairs, wedding magazines, mood boards, wish lists, books and spreadsheets. I’m planning everything except the alcohol (since my sum total knowledge is that Bexx likes rioja). It’s important to note at this point that I’m a person who identifies as non-binary – I don’t sit on either side of the man/ woman seesaw, instead I stand in the centre. We headed to our first wedding fair in autumn. It was great fun. This was, however, where we encountered our first problem: “So, which one of you is getting married?” “Both of us.” “Oh, a double wedding!” “No, we are marrying each other...” The vendor seemed somewhat stumped, which I thought was strange, given that equal marriage has been legal in most of the UK for years. Why did they find this so odd? That didn’t put us off though, and we soon headed to another wedding fair. After all, free cake! Again, we were asked some variation of who was getting married, and we answered that we were marrying each other. This was becoming a pattern. The vendors looked us up
and down, assessing us as a couple. One person of indeterminate gender in jeans and a hoodie, and one person, clearly a woman, in more feminine clothes. Bride located! So they start asking Bexx questions: “What’s your colour scheme/decor/theme?” Bexx is panicking. She doesn’t know. She doesn’t really like weddings, and her self-chosen jobs are food and honeymoon, along with listening to my rants about heteronormativity and cisnormativity. So I jump in and tell them our colour scheme – rainbow. The conversation stilts and soon the vendor moves on to someone more “traditional”. In my experience, when a vendor reads us as two brides, they are often reluctant to offer their services. I don’t know if it’s homophobia or if they think two brides equals double bridezilla. Either way, it’s not an encouraging start. Wedding magazines aren’t much better. I have yet to find one with a substantial section on same-sex weddings – and I have no hope for finding gender-squiggly ones, particularly since under UK law you have to marry under a binary gender title. They are all for the bride planning her hetero wedding. Same-sex relationships
might get a fifth of a page regarding legality or the difference between a civil partnership and marriage. These magazines have prompted some serious questions though: Is it a “gay thing” to both be involved in the planning process? Is it a “gay thing” to understand the expense of a wedding dress? Is it a “gay thing” (or an “us thing”) to not argue? Bexx and I haven’t argued about the wedding once. I suggest something, she vetoes it, I sigh because it feels like she isn’t invested, she assures me she is, I tell her I’ve been dreaming about this since I was a tiny enby (although in those days there was a rainbow corset and tear-away skirt for ease of horse riding into the sunset). If these magazines are how to do weddings, then we’re doing it wrong. Finding inspiration sadly lacking in these mags, we head to Pinterest. I can’t recommend it enough if you’re a queer couple looking for decor and cake ideas. However, if you’re looking for non-binary inspo, you’re out of luck. While you can find hundreds of placards, giant cardboard letters, personalised paper napkins and cake toppers, they all say the same things: Mr&Mrs, Mr&Mr or Mrs&Mrs. I’ve yet to find anything that deviates from the norm. We’re looking for Ms&Mx and I challenge you to find that on a cake topper, big cardboard letters, placard or personalised napkin! Of course, Etsy is a good option if you’re looking for custom-made, but telling every potential vendor “This is my gender and this is what it means” is exhausting. So why is it so hard to plan your wedding when you’re non-binary? Well, you encounter the same pitfalls that those of us who identify as non-binary experience on a daily basis: namely the lack of recognition. It’s no wonder then that navigating wedding planning is so difficult, given its highly gendered history. It’s hard enough planning a same-sex wedding, never mind when one or both of you are non-binary. I doubt most wedding fair vendors would recognise an enby even if you carried an explanatory sign. In my experience, homophobia is rampant throughout the wedding planning industry and it makes you wonder if, just because it is legal, you’re meant to marry queer. It seems the only way to have a truly non-binary wedding is to do it yourself.
What will you see in Cardiff?
www.irisprize.org
| VIEWS | JANE HILL |
JANE HILL SHARES AN INTERVIEW TO REMEMBER IN HER LAST DIVA COLUMN
“Dramas marking that milestone have largely left women out” 20 OCTOBER 2017
There are some interviews I’ve carried out in my career that I will never forget. Recently I had the pleasure of speaking to a remarkable 90-year-old man. He was a little slow walking and needed help settling himself into our studio chair, but his eyes sparkled and his conversation was razor-sharp. He’s been with his partner for more than 50 years. They were one of the first couples to have a civil partnership when they came into law in 2005, and have since converted that partnership into marriage. I could have chatted to him for hours about what he’s lived through as a gay person in this country. I wanted to hear how he’d navigated his younger years, when simply being who he was was a criminal offence. He said he’d always managed to avoid being caught by the police. “Did you just get lucky?” I asked, to which he chuckled and said with glee that he thought you could be one step ahead if you kept your wits about you. He suggested that many of the “coppers” sent to deliberately entrap men were pretty lumbering and he’d enjoyed the thrill
of outwitting them. He acknowledged, of course, that not everyone was as nimble or as fortunate as him, and he knew men who’d been arrested and sent to prison. He was 40 years old by the time homosexuality was partially decriminalised in England and Wales in 1967. That legislation stipulated that “homosexual acts” were no longer illegal for two men if you were over 21 years old and kept your relations private. But it didn’t apply in the armed forces, which prompted another chuckle from my interviewee – he’d been in the navy as a young man where he’d had plenty of experiences with men. Above all, I wanted to know whether in his youth he’d ever envisaged that same-sex couples in Britain would one day be able to marry. The look of astonishment on his face was a visual reminder of how far we’ve come. “Good lord, no”, he said, and he was so interested to hear about my own civil partnership. He was a thoughtful, intelligent and delightful man who appeared robust, having travelled through life largely untroubled by his sexuality – but he had to concede that he’d never come out to his family. He said he’d kept his distance from his parents and could never have told them he was gay. We have heard so many tales like his in the last few months, many heartbreaking, all of them fascinating – but most of them pertaining to gay men. That, of
course, is because the laws governing certain sexual activities didn’t apply to women. Male homosexuality was recriminalised in Britain in 1885, lesbianism was not. I have enjoyed watching and listening to the dramas and documentaries commissioned to mark that 50-year legal milestone, but they have largely left women out. I would now love to talk to a 90-year-old gay or bi woman about her experiences of living through an oppressive era when to be “other” was socially unacceptable, even if it didn’t carry the risk of a criminal conviction. That would be another interview to remember. Very sadly, this will be my final regular column for DIVA. My day job demands that I remain neutral about issues I care passionately about, so I’ve reluctantly decided that my time as a columnist has run its natural course. I’ve so enjoyed being part of a publication that is valuable to LGBT women – regular readers will recall an earlier piece about the role DIVA played in my own life when I was struggling with my sexuality in my 30s. I never imagined I would one day write for the very magazine that helped me then, and I’m grateful that its publishers and editors gave me the opportunity to do so. Thank you for all of your kind messages over the last year. I wish all of you continued success and happiness.
@JaneHillNews
PHOTO JEFF OVERS/BBC
I’ll always remember…
| VIEWS | REETA LOI |
Love and Pride REETA LOI SHARES HER MOVING JOURNEY TO WALKING IN PRIDE
“I know that sometimes we need loss in order to grow”
On the morning of Pride In London this summer I woke up and burst into tears. It would be my first time walking in the parade. I was leading gaysians.org, the umbrella group I co-founded for wider representation of UK-wide British Asian LGBT+ support groups. We had 100 spaces and were oversubscribed just through word of mouth. But I couldn’t grasp the importance of this moment. I missed my family. I missed my wife. What I felt was loss and grief that I wouldn’t be sharing this day with them. My wife had been by my side for over 12 years, encouraging me, consoling me and holding me as I dealt with my family disowning me because of our choice to marry. As I learned to slowly accept myself; and as I navigated my way through the loneliness and rejection to eventually share my story and start building a community of my own. I’d arrived somewhere monumental on my journey, and I’d never felt so alone – without her and her family, who had become my own. As I write this, in the week that would have been our ninth wedding anniversary, I feel overwhelmed by an ache in my chest that has been constant for six months. The divorce papers await my signature and I feel unready to sign my married name for the last time. The year has been a gruelling time of grief upon grief. How did our dream life become a nightmare? Waking each morning and realising that the universe has picked me up and thrown me into
a parallel life where nothing makes sense anymore, I’m groundless. Sliding, floating through the day, randomly crying on the street, at work or with friends who have been my rock. Back to Pride morning – I receive a text from my wife. She says she’s thinking of me and will look out for me in the parade. The pain in my chest seems to disappear for a moment. I tell her I’m sad not to be sharing the day with her. She says we will hold each other in our hearts today and be proud of who we are and what we stand for. I felt held again for a moment. My mum calls and I try to hold it together, but end up being defeated by a wail. She wants to know what’s wrong. I tell her. She’s shocked. Everyone is. She tells me not to worry, everything will be ok. I’m strong. I’m the strong one, she says. I rush to Great Portland Street, running late to meet my group, trying to eat a whole boiled egg and down a coffee. I see them, the queer, brown, beautiful Gaysians that have come from all over the UK and as far as Mumbai and Canada to be here. I paint rainbow stripes on everyone’s faces as I introduce myself, having not met about 95% of them. The anticipation builds as we join our space in the parade and our dhol drummers start setting up. They unleash some traditional desi beats and we go wild. A mini carnival starts as our drummers begin playing along with another group of marching drums further up
the parade. Our smiles could not have been bigger. Eventually we begin to move and, as we start dancing down the street, I’m faced by a sea of hundreds, thousands (in fact one million) people cheering us on and celebrating with us. Fuck me, I’d been so preoccupied that I hadn’t even thought about the actual parade! Walking through the closed streets of London, cheered and supported my so many people for being our beautiful queer selves. WOW! About an hour in, we were elated and in full force when I hear my name called at full pelt behind all the cheers. I run over to see my wife. We embrace in tears. “You did it,” she says. “You did it,” I tell her. “I couldn’t have done it without you, I love you.” I kiss her. “I love you too,” she says before telling me to get back to my crew, her beautiful smile shining through, like a beacon. That moment was a much-needed time of connection after six months of pain for us both and over 12 years of struggle for me to get here. I don’t think anyone gets married expecting to break up. I’m sure everyone thinks it won’t happen to them. I know that sometimes we need loss in order to grow. And even behind all the hurt and anger and loss, there is love. I hope that’s what we take with us. Because it’s that love that got me here, and I wouldn’t change that for anything.
@ r_e_e_t_a_ 21
| VIEWS | DIATRIBE |
Let’s trash tradition IT’S TIME TO RIP UP THE RULE BOOK ON WEDDINGS, SAYS NADIA HUQ
“We can craft a day that sings with our little pleasures and idiosyncrasies” 22 OCTOBER 2017
One of the best weddings I’ve ever been to was a same-sex wedding. I arrived at the town hall to find the couple, all smiles, greeting each and every guest and urging them to find a seat. There was no grandiose entrance, no stuffy dress code, no excited titters about their outfits. Instead, they walked down the aisle, hand in hand, as their families and friends looked on with love. So many women dread their big entrance, I had no idea it could be like this. I’ve heard brides retching or snuffling tearfully in the loos before calling through the bolted door, “I’m fine! Really... I’ll be fine once it’s all over.” I’ve practiced walking (walking!) for half an hour before a big aisle debut – the bride and bridesmaids all shuffling and tripping behind each other in a circle, like terrified ducklings. It honestly wouldn’t surprise me if some brides are chasing their breakfast glass of champagne with a dioralyte to quell their palpitating stomachs. How did we get to this point? If we all hate walking down an aisle with a roomful of people staring at us, why do we keep doing it, like lemmings plodding relentlessly to the edge of a cliff? And then I remember: tradition. This is what society tells us to do. This is what our friends and families have done for generations before us – the big bridal reveal, the collective gasp, the groom looking on dreamily as his bride wafts down the aisle in clouds of tulle.
From the speeches, to the cake cutting, weddings are so choreographed that doing anything a little differently can feel weirdly jarring, like playing a false note in a symphony we know and love. I was at a wonderful wedding recently where the couple decided not to have a first dance. Someone turned to me and whispered, “such a shame”. Well ladies, this is a golden opportunity for us, because most people have no preconceptions about what a same-sex wedding should look like. We’ll never hear the words, “Oh, but it’s tradition for a lesbian to walk down the aisle/wear a white dress/toss the bouquet/sit in silence during the speeches whilst the menfolk coddle and coo at her like a prized terrier”. It’s not just that we’re entitled to ignore the rule book – it’s that the rule book doesn’t work for us, period. See this stuff here? The traditions? The misogyny? Doesn’t apply. Because when all this shit went down, we were barely allowed to exist, let alone fall in love and get married. No one will sit at our weddings and whisper “She’s wearing yellow Jen. Yellow. Barb will be fucking devastated,” because Barb has presumably embraced her daughter’s sexuality and realised it’s totally unreasonable to be devastated by the colour of an outfit. When it comes to same-sex weddings, the etiquette police have nothing for us. Nada, bupkis. No doubt they’ve been so overwhelmed with
all this progress, they’ve been forced to retire tearfully to the caviar room to convene an urgent meeting of the forks and spoons. Maybe one day we won’t have this kind of freedom. Maybe tradition will catch up with us. Maybe in 10 or 15 or 20 years’ time a young bride will be reading an article that says: “It’s customary for two brides to wear complementary pastel colours”, or “same-sex people particularly enjoy bagpipes at weddings”, or some other such nonsense. But for now we have a blank canvas to do with what we will. We can paint whatever we want, douse it in whiskey, throw fistfuls of bread and butter pudding at it, put our whole foot through and use it for kindling. We can craft a day that sings with our little pleasures and idiosyncrasies, and where the only person retching into a toilet is Uncle Tim after eight red wines and a thoroughly ill-advised tequila. We can serve fried chicken, or vegan hotpots, or 18 different types of hummus because I bloody well like hummus and it’s my day. We can wear suits, or dresses, or jeans, or leathers. We can walk down the aisle alone or with our wife-to-be, or we can just wander down it nattering to our guests. Gather the pitchforks, stoke the fires, and let’s all bellow together: NO MORE COLD SALMON STARTERS! Weddings, hear me now: we’re coming for you.
| VIEWS | CERIAN JENKINS |
All the single ladies CERIAN JENKINS SHARES A WEDDING SURVIVAL GUIDE FOR THOSE FLYING SOLO
“Focus on the real reason you’re there, to celebrate love”
Ah, weddings. Much like wrinkles and existential crises, matrimony only made the occasional guest appearance in my early twenties, but as I near the big three-oh it seems to be piling up in excess. On one hand, I’m genuinely delighted for my friends and love being invited to witness their special day. On the other, I’m a bitter hag who resents becoming a veteran of flying solo. But luckily that means I’m in the perfect position to offer an almost military-level survival guide for all fellow singletons. 1. RECRUIT A DATE: If you don’t get the option to bring a plus-one, please skip directly to point two. We’ve got this, don’t worry. If you do get a plusone, remember, your choice of Filler Date must be made wisely as you will be stuck with this person for a number of hours. My go-to is to bring along a friend instead of an actual date, because who wants to decide between impressing somebody you barely know and seeing how many crab meat canapés it’s possible to stuff in your cheeks at once? 2. DRESS TO IMPRESS (YOURSELF): Ensemble empowerment is “a thing”, and one of the quickest way to give yourself a much-needed confidence boost is to wear something that makes you feel a million bucks. You don’t want to look like you’re trying to outdo the bride, of course, but an
extra bit of glitz never hurt anybody. 3. TABLE TACTICS: When it comes to weddings, seating is half the game. Your experience can hinge on who gets the honour of watching you quaff down that fourth (or was it fifth?) glass of bubbly whilst simultaneously babbling about how sentimental moments always remind you of your (sob) first girlfriend. Trust me – if you can, call in a favour and request to be seated next to the funniest singleton at the wedding. They will always trump the hottest. 4. THINK BEFORE YOU DRINK: Yes, “free” and “alcohol” are probably two of the favourite words known to humankind, but an open bar is both your best and worst friend. There’s an art to finding the line between “too drunk” and “not drunk enough”, which falls somewhere between having enough Dutch courage to have a cheeky flirt with that gorgeous woman at the bar, and having to spend the next wedding you’re invited to trying to avoid all the people you snogged at previous receptions. 5. PLAY AT PAPARAZZI: Taking photos of other happy couples might sound like a terrible idea, but it can actually be really fun (and helpful) to offer your services. It gives you something to do, you can act busy when a gran starts pulling the “I’m-old-and-mightdie-at-any-moment-so-you-need-to-
get-married-ASAP” schtick, and people will be really chuffed to have some lovely pictures of themselves looking gorgeous. You might even catch a candid photo of the couple which they can treasure forever. 6. DANCE IT UP... IF YOU WANT: Even when you’re rocking the single life, a dance floor can be tons of fun and, best of all, you’re dancing to your own rules. Wallflower? Have no fear, you don’t even need to get up and dance, but can choose to sit back, relax and watch. Dancing Queen? Well, you’re sorted, and you don’t even need to waste precious minutes convincing your date to join you. Besides, consider this: when the DJ plays Single Ladies, someone needs to represent. 7. MAINTAIN PERSPECTIVE: If you find that none of the above tips have made a difference to the dread, focus on the real reason you’re there – to celebrate and support your friends, who obviously think you are an important enough part of their life to want you there on their big day. There are so many more bloody difficult things in life than being young(ish), single and going to a fancy party in a nice dress to watch two people celebrate their love for each other. Plus there’s always those canapés. Bon appétit!
@CerianJenkins 23
| VIEWS | ELEANOR MARGOLIS |
ELEANOR MARGOLIS RECEIVES AN UNEXPECTED PROPOSAL
“Even at this wedding, my girlfriend and I are on display” 24 OCTOBER 2017
Most queer people know that coming out isn’t something you do once. You come out to an assortment of strangers every time you kiss your partner in public, or to your Uber driver when he asks you why you don’t have a husband (this has happened to me at least twice). Coming out can be something you do nearly every day. And perhaps the biggest, loudest, most ceremony-rich coming out day is the first family wedding you go to with your girlfriend as your plus-one. “Is that your… friend?” asks an aunt, nodding towards the woman who is quite a lot more than my friend. She’s across the room immersed in a presumably just as uncomfortable conversation with another conservative relative. “Uh, well, yes,” I say. “My girlfriend,” I emphasise. “Yes, right,” she replies. This is, really and truly, my first personal experience of the age-old “friend” euphemism. As if such a thing is needed for same-sex partner. And it really does hit you like a sack of dildos. “Friend” – are you kidding me? I should marry her right here and now (at my brother’s heterosexual wedding) just so I can respond “No, she’s my wife, actually.” Because having a zesty retort up my sleeve seems to me like a perfectly acceptable reason to commit myself to someone for life! I should
throw in four children and a semi-detached mock Tudor house in Surbiton just to make us all the more married. Not that I actually want a single one of those things, but if one more person calls my girlfriend my “friend”, I swear to god, I am capable of living a boring suburban life out of pure spite. Even at this wedding though, my girlfriend and I are sort of on display. Ninety per cent of the people here couldn’t care less, but I have been warned about a fundamentalist Christian lurking somewhere near the canapés. And I still can’t help feeling that this is both my brother’s wedding and my “Yes, I really am a giant lesbian; all the rumours are true; here’s my girlfriend to prove it” party. Completely by accident, we’re both dressed in navy blue, and I’m starting to wonder if some of the older people here are assuming this is some kind of Gay Thing – to wear the same colour as your partner. Same-sex. Same-colour. Either way, the GF thinks we look adorable, and I’m worried we look like weird boning twins – as opposed to normal boning twins, I suppose. When we sit down to dinner, there are tiny envelopes in our places. As wedding favours my brother and brand new sister-in-law have written everyone a personal note, promising a literal favour. As I read mine, my face
does something to warrant the GF looking at me and saying, “What…?” I think about it for a second before giving in and just handing her the piece of paper. Then she makes a face I don’t think I’ve ever seen. On anyone. It’s a combination of primal fear, curiosity and hilarity; like she just opened the door to a chainsaw-wielding maniac who told her a fantastic joke. “Should you decide to have a kid”, the note says, my brother is “happy to donate his sperm to my girlfriend”. Which, indeed, manages to be simultaneously horrifying and extremely moving. Whichever one it really is, I feel like my girlfriend has just been welcomed into the family the Margolis-way – with an offer of being impregnated by my brother. While we dance together to the rockabilly band, I can’t get the thought of my nephew/son or niece/daughter out of my head. But there’s still something quite beautiful about it. Maybe this barefaced and kind of inappropriate display of acceptance from my brother cancels out the “friend” comment earlier. But if my relatives could find the sweet spot between refusing to acknowledge that we’re in a relationship, and wanting to help us get pregnant, that would be ideal.
@EleanorMargolis
ILLUSTRATION FERNANDO WSAFONT
Coming out to a reception
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ELLEN PAGE
“Everything is different now...”
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HOW TO GET MARRIED
A step-by-step guide
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WIN YOUR WEDDING
Dream day worth £15,000
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HAPPY EVER AFTER?
A cynic’s quest for long-lasting love
FEATURES
Kate & Becky’s big day Celesbians say I Do
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two brides, four weddings & a lot of love
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Not hiding any more 26 OCTOBER 2017
More information on p4 divadigital.co.uk
THREE YEARS AFTER PUBLICLY COMING OUT, ELLEN PAGE TELLS US WHY SHE’S HAPPIER THAN EVER WORDS CARRIE LYELL
T
he last time Ellen Page appeared on our cover it was January 2016, ahead of the UK release of Freeheld, the true story of Laurel Hester, a New Jersey police detective fighting to change county policy so that her pension could be given to her partner Stacie Andree. Fresh out of the closet, Andree was Page’s first time playing a lesbian and marked both a personal and professional turning point. At the time she said she was “so much happier having fully come out”, and said that when she finally found the courage to say the words “I’m gay” on Valentine’s Day 2014 at a Human Rights Campaign event “all the dark clouds went away – instantly”. But what has life been like since? We jumped at the chance to find out.
| COVER STORY | ELLEN PAGE |
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| COVER STORY | ELLEN PAGE |
28 OCTOBER 2017
“ I feel an inner peace now which I hadn’t felt in a very long time”
“Everything is different,” the 30-year-old Canadian tells us, smiling. “From one day to the next [after coming out], I felt a happiness and an inner peace which I hadn’t known for years. My life now is overwhelming and I’m glad to be in a position where I can support my community and also help show that you can still play all kinds of roles after you are out. Things are changing fast and the more people who come out will ultimately help put an end to the idea that coming out destroys your career. We have to make that happen.” Indeed, being out as a lesbian hasn’t stopped her working – something she feared it might. Yes, Page has inevitably become a kind of spokesperson for LGBT equality, and it was this that led to her hosting Gaycation, an Emmynominated Viceland (viceland.com) series, for which she is also executive producer, where Page and BFF Ian Daniel explore queer culture around the world. And she plays the daughter of a man on death row who falls in love with a woman (played by Kate Mara) on the other side of her family’s campaign to save him in My Days Of Mercy. Produced by Christine Vachon, it premiered this month at the Toronto International Film Festival. But it hasn’t been all gay, gay, gay. No way way way. Post coming out, Page has played a variety of roles, from the titular Tallulah about a feral young woman who arrives unexpectedly on the doorstep of her boyfriend’s estranged mother’s house; to Courtney in the upcoming remake of 90s classic Flatliners which starred Kiefer Sutherland, Kevin Bacon and Julia Roberts. The 2017 version, directed by Niels Arden Oplev, follows the same premise as the original – five ambitious medical students obsessed with the afterlife embark on an experiment to stop their hearts for short periods of time to try and experience it for themselves – and Page stars alongside Nina Dobrev (The Vampire Diaries), Diego Luna (Rogue
2017
POWER LIST
LESBIAN | BISEXUAL | QUEER | CIS AND TRANS A new day is dawning for lesbian, bi and queer women working in entertainment, politics, culture and business. Those who are LGBT are finding new forms of opportunity and success every day, as the UK moves towards a more inclusive climate for gender and sexual minorities.
The DIVA Power List brings together the most influential lesbian, bi and queer voices. It is not confined or defined by economic status, education or skin colour, but by the actions taken to influence and enact positive change across our community.
Nominations can be made in the following categories, they will then be included in the final list:
MEDIA | BUSINESS | VOLUNTARY SECTOR | ARTS | ACTIVISM | CELEBRITY
NOMINATE NOW divapowerlist.com
Launching at our DIVA Christmas Party at Scala London, 20 December
One, The Terminal), Kiersey Clemons (Dope) and Happy Valley villain James Norton. Signing up to the project was a no-brainer for Page who has dipped her toes in sci-fi many times before as Kitty Pryde in the X-Men films and Ariadne in 2010’s Inception. “I was a big fan of the original Flatliners,” Page says, “And I’m excited to be part of it. It’s an interesting concept and it was great to work with Niels and the cast.” She’s certainly excited about her career, and life generally. She’s happy too. In fact, Page today has a spring in her step that fans will note was missing for a long time. What’s underneath this joie de vivre? “I’m so happy to be able for the first time in my life to align my authentic self with my creative world. I’m getting to be part of projects that I believe in and I can produce films like the one I did with Evan Rachel Wood last year (Into The Forest) and do similar kinds of things which I couldn’t do, or hesitated to do, before.” Like many of us, Page has a clearly defined “before” and “after” when it comes to coming out, and she doesn’t sugarcoat how destructive that “before” period of her life was. “Before, I had to hide my sexuality and that was making me increasingly unhappy, uncomfortable and anxious. I’m excited and enthusiastic about my work again. It feels the same way it did when I was 15 and beginning my career. It’s such a different feeling to be open about who you are and simply live that way and not have to put on masks and hide your identity. I feel an inner peace now which I hadn’t felt in a very long time.” That inner peace has changed everything – from Page’s outlook to the quality of the work she’s making – proof perhaps of the toll hiding a part of our identity can take. Page says: “I feel like I’ve been able to open up to the world. As an individual, it’s night and day when I compare how I feel and the person I am today to the person I 30 OCTOBER 2017
was before. It’s affected the way I move and the energy I have, just the way I spend my day.” Another upshot to living authentically, she says, is the freedom to be open about her relationships and “not worry” about being spotted by paparazzi out and about with girlfriends or “telling people I’m in love if I choose to do that”. She was clearly delighted to be able to walk the red carpet with her ex Samantha Thomas at the Toronto International Film Festival back in 2015, and these days she seems relaxed about being snapped locking lips with girlfriend Emma Portner, a 22-year-old dancer and choreographer originally from Ottawa, Canada. These days coming outs (thankfully) don’t tend to generate the negative headlines they used to, and some wonder what all the fuss is about. But there are many Hollywood stars who are still reluctant to come out, each with their own reasons – fear of finding themselves unemployed, or unemployable, being one of the major causes of perpetual closet-dom. Page, though, is blunt when she says that hiding is not for her, not any more. “Some people make an adjustment and live by hiding their true selves. It was a toxic situation for me, the fear that comes with the hiding. You can’t hold hands with your girlfriend if you’re walking down the street. You can’t talk about your partner. It becomes frustrating not to be able to involve them in your life or invite them to events in your professional life that are very meaningful to you. You are simply not able to live your authentic self and live openly with someone you love. You also feel uncomfortable just in terms of your body language and not being able to dress the way you would like. I reached a point where my desire to come out was so great that even if everyone in Hollywood had told me that I’ll never work again, it wouldn’t have made
any difference. I didn’t want to hide any more.” Coming out is one thing – but accepting and embracing the fact that lesbian, gay, bi or trans may then prefix everything you do from thereon out is another. And while some in Page’s shoes might have shunned the role model status applied to those in the public eye that are out, it’s something she has happily taken on. Being an advocate for equality is clearly important to her – especially in these globally tumultuous and politically regressive times – and it seems that her role in Freeheld has inspired her to live up to the example set by Hester, Andree and other fearless LGBT activists who have created great and lasting change in the name of queer liberation. “What [Hester and Andree] did was very brave and remarkable for their time. We’ve made so much progress since then, even though we still have a long way to go. There’s still a lot of discrimination going on and a lot of fear. Also, the LGBTQ community is facing a backlash and a lot of negative rhetoric from prominent politicians in reaction to that progress. That’s why it’s important to keep fighting, and another great benefit of my being out – I can actively campaign and work and defend my community and also be part of different projects that address such issues.” Reflecting on how things have changed for her, a grinning Page echoes the sentiments she made in our last interview, and says she wished she’d come out sooner. But it’s so heartwarming to see her making up for lost time, and living her best life. “There’s a huge ripple effect to this kind of a journey and it changes every aspect of your world,” she says. “My life is so much happier and I couldn’t feel more grateful and fortunate than I do now.”
Flatliners is in UK cinemas 29 September.
| COVER STORY | ELLEN PAGE |
“Even if everyone in Hollywood told me I’ll never work again, it wouldn’t’ve made any difference” 31
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| FEATURE | WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY|
34 OCTOBER 2017
g n i t n e docum
PHOTOGRAPHER ANETE LŪSINA EXPLAINS WHY THIS DIVA READERS’ WEDDING WAS EXTRA SPECIAL
PHOTOS ANETE LŪSINA
A
s a wedding photographer I get to see the full spectrum of emotions at weddings, but this one was oh-so-special
to me. Kate and Becky, both from the UK, met in Southeast Asia when they were working and travelling. Life took its twists and turns and now they spend their life together in Cambodia, working as teachers. To celebrate their union they planned a wedding back in England, to share with their closest family and friends. People travelled from as far as Australia to be a part of their beautiful day. The wedding took place at The Pumping House in Ollerton, a small town in Nottinghamshire, and was organised by wedding planner Amy Thorne from Amaranthyne Weddings, meaning I could fully immerse myself in the day and document all of the emotions as they happened. The pair were clearly meant to be, a fact to which their family and friends testified during the speeches. But you didn’t really need to hear them to know that they both hold a very special place in each other’s hearts. The loving vows Kate and Becky gave made myself, and everyone else, in the room tear up. I have never been a part of such an emotional wedding and I can’t bear to think that there are places in the world where these two souls can’t celebrate their love for each other. I am thankful they chose me to document it all, because these aren’t just memories for them to hold dear, these are memories I will hold onto myself as a long-lasting reminder that love will find a way.
Check out more of Anete’s work at lusinaphotography.com. 35
36 OCTOBER 2017
| FEATURE | WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY |
37
38 OCTOBER 2017
| FEATURE | FOUR WEDDINGS |
Serv ing
WORDS ROXY BOURDILLON
WEDDEDreaBLISS lness “It was never gonna be a quiet understated do for you, was it?” Jo teases her new wife Kaz affectionately, as the couple cosy up on their sofa, PJ-clad with G&Ts in hand, all set for our Skype call about their four (yes, you read that right, four) wedding celebrations. Before we go any further, allow me to break down this staggering list of nuptials for you, because with this many big days, each one more show-stopping than the last, it can get a tad confusing. First there was the legal ceremony in Stockport. “It was a requirement, so if we’re gonna do it, we’re gonna have amazing outfits for it,” says Jo, referencing their gag-worthy getups inspired by Kaz’s drag king alter ego, Jack the Lad. Then there was the five-day shindig in the south of France, which included an Indian wedding, complete with a traditional Mehndi party, honouring Kaz’s Hindu heritage – “Jo’s idea!” Kaz is quick to point out. Next up was the fairytale ceremony, also in France, attended by 36 of their nearest and dearest and, the latest must-have wedding accessory, a mariachi band. Kaz describes the scene with glee: “We’d finished our vows, we were running up the aisle, and the Mexican mariachi band came up from the
KAZ AND JO KANSAL SHARE THEIR MULTIPLE WEDDING CELEBRATIONS WITH DIVA
horizon and started singing. All our friends and family were like, ‘What the hell?’ The looks on their faces were epic.” And just when you think two people can’t possibly have the energy, imagination or inexhaustible supply of sequins to pull off yet another wedding party, they throw a decadently debauched Twisted Fairytale reception in their hometown of Manchester, paying tribute to their shared passion for drag queens and Tim Burton movies. “What is it you say?” Kaz nudges her wife, “If you’re gonna do it once you might as well do it four times.” Jo chimes in, “It was the Pringles of weddings. We got drag queens involved – it was gonna get big.” Now if you’re wondering how they afforded all this, Kaz is keen to stress: “Let me be clear, we’re in a lot of debt. It’s not like we’re millionaires. You can always make more money. Time, you can never get back.” But their multiple weddings weren’t just about eleganza extravaganza (although a mere glance at the spectacular pics shows that all four dos were fierce AF). They were about their love bringing people from all of their different worlds together, crossing divides and creating celebrations that were diverse, inclusive and shedloads of fun, which they and their guests will undoubtedly remember for the rest of their lives.
Special thanks to. .
ELLIOTT BANKS
Makeup for Jo and Kaz at the Manchester reception facebook.com/elliott.banks.18
PRIYA WARD
Kaz’s makeup for France facebook.com/retreatstockport
ANNALIESE
Jo’s hair and makeup for Stockport, and hair for Jo and Kaz for Manchester hairandmakeupbyanneliese.com
TOM KUZNIAR Choreography @TomKuzniar
ANNA PHYLACTIC AND CHEDDAR GORGEOUS Drag Queen hosts for Manchester
KELLIANNE NEWISS PHOTOGRAPHY Photography for legal ceremony and Manchester reception kelliannephotographer.co.uk
JOHN ARMSTRONG-MILLAR Photography for France armstrong-millar.com
CHRIS
Videographer for France zenfilmworks.net
CAT AND PRESLEY SWENSSON Caterers for France theeventkitchen.com
39
| FEATURE | FOUR WEDDINGS |
“Our friends, family and community all came together, whether it’s Indian or a little bit homophobic or straight or really, really camp,” explains Kaz. Jo is reflective about the challenges they faced during the build-up: “With any marriage there’s always gonna be people that have got an opinion, particularly when it’s a same-sex marriage. But ultimately, everybody realised the most important thing was that Kaz and I love each other, and actually, I don’t think anyone could have been any happier for us.” Kaz was especially touched when her dad turned up to the reception. “He’s in his 70s and it was overwhelming for him to be around drag queens, but he showed up last minute wearing his Aladdin outfit! Our families said everything we did was uncompromising. We did it because we
Special thanks to. . LOCK 91
Venue for Manchester lock-91.co.uk
LA LÉOTARDIE
Venue for France laleotardie.com
AMANDA DREW
Bride hair and makeup for Indian wedding party and French wedding french-belles.com
NAIMA
Henna at Indian wedding Mendhi party naimahennabordeaux.com
MOIRA STEPHEN
Celebrant, France acelebrantinfrance.com
GLENN JONES/WRETCHEDGINGER Images for buttonholes wretchedgingerboy.com
ANDY BENNETT-STEELE
Wedding planner facebook.com/kandypartyandevents
LIZZIE PETERS
Jo and Kaz’s custom outfits for Stockport and Kaz’s for Manchester reception facebook.com/lizziebiscuits
POLKA POPS
Cake pops for Manchester Reception polkapops.co.uk
CHESHIRE BRIDAL WEAR Wedding dresses cheshirebridalwear.co.uk
CHRIS DRESDEN STYLES Manchester DJ
40 OCTOBER 2017
wanted to make each other happy and they were glad to be a part of it.” As Kaz and Jo melt my heart and make me hoot with laughter in equal measure, the connection between them radiates right out of my laptop screen. The pair met online and were mates for years before one drunken snog turned into a full-blown relationship, culminating in their own personal “wedding season”. Speaking of which, they were overwhelmed by the support they received from their beloved drag community. Jo describes how instrumental the gang from their regular haunt Cha Cha Boudoir were, especially, but not only, at their Manchester bash. Cha Cha’s DJ provided the tunes, a drag makeup artist painted their faces for the gods and a drag costumier created their sickening outfits. Drag queen pals Anna Phylactic and Cheddar Gorgeous hosted the proceedings and even choreographed their first dance. “It felt like a real drag community effort.” Naturally they both worked hard as well to bring the extraordinary events to life, with Kaz focussing on “big-picture stuff” like booking venues and Jo, a self-confessed “detail demon”, in charge of the more creative elements. “I spent about 15 hours glittering picture frames,” she admits sheepishly. Kaz fetches a meticulously sparkled photo of drag legend Jinx Monsoon and holds it up to the webcam proudly: “Look at the detail on that!” She then presents a table decoration from the Twisted Fairytale party. It’s Tinkerbell meets The Human Centipede – very artistic, slightly scary, totally on-theme. “Oh, it was lovely,” Jo sighs wistfully. “Sunday afternoon brunch, drinking prosecco and hacking up Tinkerbell!” They both guffaw again, the shared sense of humour that’s evident in all four celebrations on full display. “Me and Jo are extra,” Kaz beams. I ask if marriage has changed their relationship and Kaz assures me, “We still bicker, we still have a laugh, we still stay home in our slobs, but having that title makes me feel even more like I want to make sure this relationship does work.” Jo agrees: “And if we are falling out, Kaz waves her wedding ring at me and says, ‘Too late now!’” “That is correct,” Kaz confirms, grinning cheekily at her wife.
41
42 OCTOBER 2017
how to get
married TYING THE KNOT? ALLOW US TO GUIDE YOU PAST THE BUREAUCRATIC BS YOU’LL HAVE TO NAVIGATE WHEN YOU DECIDE TO SAY “I DO”
WORDS SOPHIE BROWN
| FEATURE | HOW TO GET MARRIED | So, you’re engaged. You’ve managed to successfully navigate the murky waters of who’s going to propose to who and found a compromise that will eventually result in you marrying the human you love. Congratulations! This will be one of the most exciting and exhilarating times; and whether you’re planning a modest occasion with close friends and family or an all-night bash to which everyone has a plus-one, there’s more to planning than just invites and rings. When we got engaged, I’d already been secretly planning our wedding on a private Pinterest board since our second date. All I had to do was change its visibility from secret to public and I was ready to rock, but I was completely oblivious to the legal bits that actually make a wedding possible. I soon found myself anxiously googling “How to get married”, and tentatively began embarking on the journey to becoming legally wed.
CHOOSING THE VENUE I already knew where I wanted us to get married – our local pub. It’s a place where we’ve celebrated birthdays and anniversaries, shared lazy Sundays tucking into roasts with our families, and raised a glass to loved ones gone. It’s where we go to celebrate when things go right, and get blind drunk when things go terribly wrong. It’s not just a pub, it’s a memory bank, and we couldn’t think of anywhere better to tie the knot. So with the ring on my finger and my Pinterest board overflowing, I rang the pub and asked to come over to check out the reception rooms. It was there that we learned our first lesson in wedding planning: you can’t just get married anywhere. Luckily the pub we’d chosen just happened to be one of the few that are licensed to hold civil ceremonies (that’s a non-religious wedding, by the way). In order for a venue to hold a wedding ceremony, it has to be approved to do so. You can see the list of approved premises on the government’s website (tinyurl.com/mkvlb6t), or get in touch with your local council for a list of venues in your area. We chose our venue quickly – the manager showing us around the pub jotted down our date, looked up cheerfully and said “Now you can register your intent to marry!”
YOUR LICENCE TO LOVE We had no idea what he was talking about because Pinterest doesn’t tell you these things. In order to marry in the UK, you have to give notice of your intent to marry at your local registry office at least 28 days before you get married. That means shotgun weddings are off the cards.
Before you head to the registry office, discuss whether you want a marriage or a civil partnership. Since equal marriage came into effect in 2014, marriage seems like the obvious choice, but that doesn’t mean it’s right for you. Civil partnerships were introduced in the UK to give same-sex couples a marriage alternative (without all of the same legal rights), but some couples still opt for it because of the religious connotations of marriage. There’s no right or wrong answer – both are available to you, and it’s up to you which one. Once you’ve decided, you can make an appointment with your local registry office to give your notice to marry. This is essentially just telling your local council that you fancy each other and want to make it official with a wedding. It costs £35 each, but can be more if you or your partner are from outside the EEA or Switzerland, and takes roughly half an hour. You’ll meet with a registrar, who might say something like “What’s their favourite colour?” or “What was the name of their first pet?” as a misguided joke to try and scare you. They don’t really care about colours or pets; they just want to scan your ID, ask what you do for a living and get you to sign a piece of paper confirming your identity. You’ll be expected to tell them where you plan to marry – if you change this before the wedding, you’ll have to repeat this process and pay again, so make sure you’ve got your venue on lock first! If you and your partner would prefer to be married in a religious ceremony, talk to those in charge of weddings at your place of worship. Religious ceremonies for same-sex couples aren’t as popular, but they’re not completely out of the question! This varies between religious organisations, but for more details see gov.uk.
BOOKING THE REGISTRAR Now is also the time to book the registrar for the big day. Registrars perform non-religious weddings and make sure that all the legal boxes are ticked. If you’re getting married at the registry office, the civil ceremony currently costs £46. However, if the registrar needs to travel to another approved ceremony venue (like a hotel or castle) then prices vary between local authorities and can cost up to £500. After this meeting, your notice of marriage will be shown publicly in the registry office for 28 days. When those 28 days are up, you’ll be issued your “authority to marry” (or licence to love, as we like to call it). This license will be valid for 12 months. With your marriage license on its way, the registrar booked up and the venue on hold, you’re set to get hitched. You can stop here if
you’re opting for a minimalist do, but if (like me) you’re planning a wedding to rival the Royals, it’s time to get to the good stuff.
BUDGET, BUDGET, BUDGET They say you can’t put a price on love, but you absolutely can. The wedding website Hitched puts the average cost of a wedding at £25,090, and when you start to wade into the details, it’s easy to see how. By this point in your wedding planning journey, you will have already spent at least £100 on giving notice and booking the registrar. If you’ve placed a deposit for a venue, it’s likely to be much more than that. If you haven’t already done so, now is a good time to draw up budget. This will give you a better idea of how many of the extras you can really squeeze in. You might have to pick between flowers and favours, or a fancy fourcourse meal and a hog roast, but it’s better to know sooner, rather than later (i.e. when it’s booked on a non-refundable deposit). Budgets set – the time to live out your Pinterest dreams has come. Draw up your guest list, choose (and taste!) food for the big day, pick your flowers, find the perfect photographer, consider entertainment, decide what you’re going to wear, book your honeymoon, send your invites, sample lots of cake and get to grips with wedding rings.
THE FINAL HOOPS But don’t lull yourself into a false sense of fun security. There are still some bureaucratic hoops to jump through, especially if you’re changing your name. If you’re jetting off on your honeymoon straight away and have booked flights under your new names, you can apply for a new passport up to three months before the ceremony. You can get the forms you need from the Post Office. Your old passport will be cancelled and you won’t be able to travel until after the wedding, so read the small print if you’re opting for this. Otherwise, make sure all travel is booked under your maiden names and change this after you arrive home. Regardless of travel, if one of you is taking the other’s name, you can apply for a new passport at the Post Office and notify relevant agencies (DVLA, HMRC and your local authority, to name a few). You’ll need to show your certificate of marriage or civil partnership. If you’re planning on double-barrelling your names or meshing two surnames together, you’ll need to change your name via deed poll. With your name anew (or as it was, if you chose to keep it), you’ve come to the end of your wedding planning journey. And that’s the best reason to head to the pub I’ve ever heard. 43
If you’re anything like Team DIVA, you’ll thoroughly enjoy having a good gander at other people’s nuptials. It’s endlessly inspiring to see how different couples put their own sapphic stamp on their special day. So whether you’re searching for wedding inspo or you’re just nosy like us, take a look at how these celesbians got hitched in style. Best grab a hanky now–this could get emosh.
Outfits
Custom designs by Zac Posen–Ellen was radiant in a relaxed, fit ting suit while Portia looked breathtaking in her princess gown
odised, Ellen r haps st ckie “I’m the lu r ld,” wo gir l in the tia as or describing P ”. Portia ate her “soulm ve we lo added, “The people he felt from t s, and gu sur roundin ave for eh the love w ade it m each other, tiful ea u the most b l day.” na and emotio 44 october 2017
Menu
including All-vegan g rolls veggie spr in ed velve t r and vegan , prepared by e k ca g weddin al chef n so r e p their
Decor
Ecuador ian lait dahlia roses, café au s and cand lelight
It was the ultimate lesbian wedding. Our undisputed queen married her undisputed queen and we all bawled like babies. To make it even more heartwarming, it was just after samesex marriage was legalised in California. But rather than fly 500 guests to the Isle of Lesvos and get them smashed on Strawberry Dyke-inis, E and P did it in adorably intimate fashion. They were wed on 16 August 2008 in a candlelit ceremony at their LA house with only 19 of their nearest and dearest in attendance, plus their pets. (Can someone please pass the Kleenex?) Ellen explained to People magazine that they decided a grand wedding would be “too big and stressful” and chose to wed at home instead. Portia said simply, “It’s where our hearts are.” YouTube their wedding video and you’ll see the pure adoration written all over Ellen’s face the moment she sees her bride in her wedding finery for the first time. All she can say as she stares at her soon-to-be-wife in wonder is, “Oh my god, oh my god.” Meanwhile helicopters swirled overhead, desperately trying to snag pap snaps of the celebrity couple, but they managed to keep things heartfelt and deeply personal. They had no desire for a media circus. This day was purely about them celebrating their love for one another. It was authentic and understated–that is, except for Portia’s wowfactor dress. After exchanging vows, they feasted on an all-vegan banquet, sat at one long table with their guests. They shared their first dance to Stevie Wonder’s Ribbon In The Sky. Then Ellen surprised Portia with a live performance from one of her favourite singers, Joshua Radin. He did an acoustic rendition of (You Are The One I’ve Been Waiting For) Today and everyone’s hearts simultaneously turned to goo. In an interview with Good Housekeeping this August, Ellen proved that their love is still going strong nine years later: “In our vows, she recited a quote–‘It is good to be loved. It is profound to be understood’–and to me, that’s everything.”
PHOTOS YOUTUBE, INSTAGRAM @PORTIADEROSSI
EVERYTHING YOU’VE EVER WANTED TO KNOW ABOUT HOW YOUR FAVE QUEER COUPLES TIED THE KNOT WORDS ROXY BOURDILLON
More information on p9 divadigital.co.uk
such a crier, m I’ “ , d e l a e v e Lauren r this thing ’s e r e h T y. cr and I didn’t things are n e h w s n e p p a h that or it’s our t e p r ca d e r a cr azy. If it’s look at her, I s a n o o s s a – wedding okay.” everything is
Cake
PHOTOS INSTAGRAM @MARTHASTEWARTWEDDINGS, @LOMORELLI, @WHODODATLIKEDAT, PHOTOGRAPHERS JOSE VILLA, LAURENANDABBY.COM
t ti one large confe plus g, n cake for cu t ti cakes ti smaller confe t with ed for guest s serv sparklers
| FEATURE | CELESBIAN WEDDINGS |
Clot hes
custom c fr iend reations by and des Chr istia ig n Sir ian ner o
Cocktails
Samir a’s g o blood-or a -to spicy n and Laure ge margar itas n’s dr ink of choice Old Fashioned s
Actor Samira Wiley and screenwriter Lauren Morelli met while working on hit prison dramedy Orange Is The New Black. At the time, Lauren was married to a man, but realised she was gay on one of her first days on set. She split up with her hubby, fell hard for Samira (#WhoWouldnt #PousseyRiot) and then, proving lesbian fairytales do come true, the OITNB supercouple were wed, on 25 March 2017. They wanted a wedding that reflected their joie de vivre and shared love of confetti cake so they came up with a “fun-fetti” theme for their Palm Springs bash. From the invites stuffed with confetti to the champagne jelly shots topped with edible confetti-glitter, fun-fetti was everywhere. Seriously, that stuff gets stuck in all your nooks and crannies.
Their wedding was all about equality. Heck, even their aisle wasn’t straight–it was a spiral–and to make sure all guests felt equally involved, the ceremony was held in the round. Forgoing the traditional bridal party, they walked each other down the spiral aisle, high fiving friends and family on the way. Danielle Brooks, aka Taystee from Orange, serenaded them with a live performance of I Choose You by Sara Bareilles, the same track Lauren played when she proposed. Samira’s parents, who are ordained Baptist ministers, officiated. Samira told Martha Stewart Weddings, “I always knew that I wanted my parents to marry me. One thing they showed during the ceremony was that we weren’t only committing ourselves to each other, but that all of the people in attendance were there to do their part, too.
When they were asking, ‘Will you do this?’ we said, ‘I will,’ and everyone in attendance was asked the same question and said, ‘We will.’” Lauren recalled, “Samira’s vows were the funniest thing I’d ever heard. She started with, ‘Hey girl. How you doing? Your feet hurt? Me, too.’ I was doubled over laughing.” The shoes that looked amazing but caused major cramps were silver and white stilettos designed by Sophia Webster with “Wifey for Lifey” inscribed on their soles. Once they’d both declared their “I do”s, rainbow-coloured streamers and a confetti cannon signalled it was time to boogie to Uptown Funk by Mark Ronson featuring Bruno Mars. A total of 13 pounds of confetti rained down on the newlyweds and their grinning guests throughout the night. divamag.co.uk 45
Drensser desig f Dando o e in t is Chr ondon Dando L
46 october 2017
When it came to wedding planning and picking out decorations, in true Wegan style they went femmetastic. “Ours is probably one of the most feminine weddings out there!” they gushed to DIVA. “We wanted a really romantic and gorgeous vibe, with a hint of Palm Springs desert vibe.”
Time
Just before sunset in Palm Springs
Colour scheme
Uber-femme w pink flowers ith pale and gold accent s
PHOTO INSTAGRAM @MEGANFROMWEGAN
When YouTubers Whitney and Megan had a civil partnership in 2012, their intention was always to have a “big wedding” converting their CP into a marriage, but only once same-sex marriage was legalised in the UK and the US. Well, that big wedding day has finally arrived. The date is set for their anniversary, 28 September. The location? Palm Springs. The time? Sunset. The vloggers had a lot to say on the extremely important subject of dresses, having recently become the first lesbian couple to appear on the UK version of reality show Say Yes To The Dress. Last time around, they wore matching ivory Ted Baker dresses, but this time they wanted different styles to compliment their individual figures. However, there was one thing they had to keep in mind. “Knowing that we’re getting married in Palm Springs, the desert, definitely changes things! Goodbye big princess dress.” While they refused to give anything away about their final outfits (“You’ll have to wait for the pictures!”) they did confirm that they aren’t wearing the gowns they picked out in the TV programme. After initially saying “yes” to the dress, they experienced doubts, but luckily managed to find their dream dresses just in time. While some couples prefer to keep their ensembles a surprise, Whitney and Megan have a different approach. “Shop together! It’s so important that your dresses compliment each other. They don’t need to be the same but ensuring you both look equally fabulous next to each other and not clashing in colour or style is vital. Don’t listen to everyone’s opinions about your dress choice, as they will have them. What matters is how you feel and what your fiancée thinks. If she’s in love with you in the dress, then that’s the only opinion that matters.”
s t i f t u O
uit Lucy’s s s in r o f n e Dres All King & Lit t le White gown s e and Th or Georgina’ f Dublin
PHOTOS INSTAGRAM @LSPRAGGAN PHOTOGRAPHER ELYSIA DOWNINGSWVVWW
“I know it was my wedding, but it was the best wedding I’ve ever been to,” Lucy Spraggan confessed to DIVA, reminiscing about the day in June 2016 when she tied the knot with bae Georgina. To be fair, their reception does sound epic. They had a bucking bronco (Lucy’s idea), a VW Beetleturned-cocktail bar and a white London cab transformed into a photobooth. They even had their very own wedding tattoo artist (Tom Woodcock from Tats A Good Un in Yorkshire). Guests queued for hours to get their commemorative ink. Naturally Lucy and G got tat-happy themselves with Lucy going for a heart and her mum, who sounds like an absolute legend, getting a matching one and having a go on the bucking bronco. G opted for a yin yang on her back, symbolising how she and Lucy fit together perfectly. The ceremony itself was incredibly touching. G’s best friends were her bridesmaids (they brought the house down with their hilarious speech, singing
ack at b g n i k o Lo g day, n i d d e w r t hei d wi t h e m m i r b Lucy ally it r e t i L “ . y jo . It’s so t c e f r e p was people n e h w e clich he best say it’s t life, ur day of yo .” s bu t it wa
| FEATURE | CELESBIAN WEDDINGS | Lucy’s songs but changing all the lyrics) while Lucy’s three closest mates were her bridesmen. Lucy didn’t see G’s dress until the big day and watching her walk down the aisle was “unreal” and “massively overwhelming”. She admitted, “I cried so much that when the registrar said, ‘Repeat after me, I promise to love you’, I went, ‘I love to promise you’. Everyone started laughing and I started crying more.” Now, let’s discuss those spectacular get-ups. If you’re struggling to whittle your wedding outfit search down, take a tip from G, who chose hers by rating how much her mum cried when she saw her in
each of the contenders. As the party grew more raucous, G did a nifty costume-change, ending up rocking the bridal-denim look in white high-waisted jeans and a bralet, which meant she could show off her best moves on the dancefloor without putting her fancy frock at risk. Lucy had a suit hand-crafted especially for her by bespoke tailors King & Allen in Wilmslow, who she highly recommends. “It just felt like we were a couple getting married, not a lesbian couple that were getting a suit and getting frowned at. I can’t fault them.” Lucy offered a word of advice: “Put some money aside for your outfits, because you wanna feel the best you’ve ever felt.”
First dance
an old war so n called That Lo g v Weekend perf ely o r m ed by Ger aldo A nd His Orchest r a
Proposal
Lucy got down on one knee during a river cruise on the Thames on their anniversary
divamag.co.uk 47
| FEATURE | WIN YOUR DREAM WEDDING |
48 OCTOBER 2017
Win your
m a e Dr ng! i d d We WE’RE DELIGHTED TO PARTNER UP WITH SHOTGUN WEDDINGS TO OFFER ONE LUCKY COUPLE THE CHANCE TO WIN A WEDDING WORTH £15,000
We are absolutely thrilled to be teaming up with Shotgun Weddings to offer one lucky couple the chance to win their dream wedding worth £15,000! From the cake, flowers and hair and makeup, to a ceremony at the beautiful Royal Pavilion in Brighton and even a live dove release, we’ll take care of almost everything, so all you have to do is turn up and say “I do!” Award-winning photographer Emma Joanne from Shotgun Weddings, who has co-ordinated this fabulous prize, and will be providing photography on the day as well as a photo booth, told us she can’t wait to work with the winning couple to make their wedding the stuff of dreams. “I am open to whatever my couples represent and whoever they aspire to be,” Emma says. “Shotgun Weddings is all about living in a world free from categories, where we are no longer marginalised by our preferences, so I welcome anyone with the same open Photographer mentality as me. All Emma Joanne I request is that you from Shotgun love one anothWeddings er FURIOUSLY!”
To be in with a chance of winning this incredible prize, send a short paragraph about how you fell in love (no more than 100 words), along with a photo of yourselves to editorial@ divamag.co.uk with the subject line DREAM WEDDING. The closing date for entries is 20 October. For full prize details and terms and conditions, please visit divamag.co.uk.
The prize includes. . . SHOTGUN WEDDINGS
Full day photography package, plus themed photo booth
Forward-thinking wedding photography and photo booth brand, Shotgun Weddings is owned by award-winning photographer Emma Joanne, who is also the principle photog rapher. Based in Brighton and specialising in same-sex weddings, Emma consid ers herself an expert at capturing weddings in the city with her unique style and approach to your day. Included in your photography package is full day coverage from the bridal preparations to the first dance, plus a theme d photo booth of your choice for the evening’s entertainment, complete with professional prints for your guests to take home as a special momento of your day.
INFINITE LOVE CELEBRANTS
Gold wedding package: a fully personalised wedding ceremony reflecting your ideas, beliefs and personalities
Sam Goodchild is an independent celebrant dedicated to creating a wonderfully personal wedding ceremony that is just right for you. She has a vast knowledge of ceremonies and, unlike a registrar, can offer a completely personalised ceremony reflecting all of your values and beliefs. Sam can perform humanist ceremonies or more spiritual ones. Her services include a two hour consultation, drafting of your ceremony, the wedding rehearsal and
ej@shotgunweddings.co shotgunweddings.co 07807 468 555
officiating at the wedding blessing on the day.
sam@infinitelove.uk infinitelove.uk 07512 347498
THE BRIGHTON ROYAL PAVILION
Wedding ceremony in The Red Room
monument to The Royal Pavilion, a magnificent exotically most the of one is d, the romantic era of the Regency perio of Brighton and heart the in ted Loca in. Brita in beautiful buildings an unmatched setting for your wedHove’s Cultural Quar ter, it offers seaside pleasure palace when the IV’s ge Geor King ding day. Built as Regency society, it was designed le city was at the heart of fashionab great, the good and the grand the ant ench and ture to entice, enrap s as an exquisite wedding venue. of King George‘s court and now serve his brother King William IV and ge, Geor King of ng Following the passi ed here. resid niece Queen Victoria also at times age, the Royal Pavilion has herit and re cultu ry, histo Steeped in ts since the 1780s and many gues ble been welcoming royalty and nota . Over the last 20 years walls its n withi out d playe has a royal romance e weddings. Today, uniqu and tiful it has hosted some of the most beau Indian-style architecwith dour splen 1823 al origin its it’s restored to and minarets contrasted with strikture comprising of domes, towers The glorious garden is one of the t. Orien the by ed ing interiors inspir in the country, where groups of ns few fully re-instated Regency garde e striking views of the palace, fram reens everg ishing flowers and flour es of your special day. imag for creating a picture-perfect backdrop
pavilionweddings@brighton-hove.gov.uk brightonmuseums.org.uk 03000 290 905
HEBA PRIETO NOGAL
Professional hair and makeup
Heba Prieto Nogal is a highly experienced hair and makeup artist, specialising in weddings. Based in Brighton, she is able to make you look fabulous for your day and will offer you a trial beforehand to make sure she gets your look just right.
pinkpassionofmakeup@gmail.com
PRIZE ALSO INCLUDES: Florist and cake maker
PROUD COUNTRY HOUSE, STANMER PARK, BRIGHTON
Reception hire
Stanmer House is a beautiful Grade One listed 18th century manor, set in 5,000 acres of stunning parkland, and is unique for its Brighton location. Set in the heart of Sussex countryside, yet only minutes from the bustling city centre, it is nestled between the sea and the Downs. Steeped in history, the house has been beautifully restored and encompasses stylish and contemporary designs while retaining the original splendour of the house. The vast grounds and manor house are the perfect setting for any wedding. Its sense of history and welcoming atmosphere create an environment that is both inspiring and comfortable, ensuring the happy couple and their guests will have the most wonderful day. From the moment they step through the grand entrance, the magic of the house comes alive. (Please note: catering, drinks, security, sound and tech are not included.)
vicky@proud.co.uk stanmerhouse.co.uk
LAMBERT’S DOVES Live dove release
Weddings are wonderful, exciting, memorable days when lots of love and a huge amount of creative teamwork come together to give the couple the best start possible to their married life. A very special moment captured in memory and photo is a dove release. Seeing them fly changes the emotion of the – there’s a sense of awe, wonder and freedom. Elegant and beautiful, they above circle crowd they symbolise the occasion, and silently, with the beat of their wings, they leave a message of peace, love and hope for new beginnings… they are truly magical! As part of the prize, Lambert’s Doves will supply up to five white doves for release at a wedding in Brighton or the surrounding area – two doves for the couple and up to three for bridesmaids or guests to release, perhaps representing people who cannot share the special occasion in person, but who will be present in spirit.
brighton@lambertsdoves.co.uk lambertsdoves.co.uk 07942 860860 49
50 OCTOBER 2017
More information on p4 divadigital.co.uk
PHOTO YOUTUBE
| FEATURE | MARRIAGE SECRETS | I have a confession. I’m a bit meh about marriage. Maybe I’m scared of making such a huge commitment to just one… dress. It’s not that I’m emotionally frigid. If anything, I have far too many feelings. The other day I welled up listening to You’re Still The One by Shania Twain. Cards on the table, it was because it made me think about the meaningful relationship I had with the frock I was wearing - black floral wiggle, you’ve never let me down, through good days, bad days and fat days, you’re still the one. When I picture myself as an old lady, I’m living alone in a Parisian apartment overlooking the Moulin Rouge, with an admirable collection of silk kimonos, wild stories and laughter lines. And maybe a cat to spoon on a chilly winter’s night. I love deeply, humans as well as items of clothing, but I struggle to imagine vowing to be with someone “till death do us part”. It seems so morbid, so sombre. It seems like something other people do, like healthy eating or calling their parents. As I write this, my girlfriend is giving me the stink-eye. “I’m in love with you,” I insist. “I’m just not head-over-heels about getting hitched.” I’m aware that this makes me an anomaly among my fellow disciples of Ellen. Most of my queer female friends are as on board the bridal bandwagon as they are with The L Word Reboot, and I’m overjoyed for them, on both counts. When I’m invited to someone’s nuptials, I don’t bring a placard as my plus one, with “Brides are bullshit” scrawled on it aggressively in Sharpie. But it’s also true that my experience of marriage thus far hasn’t exactly been inspiring. My parents spent their pre-divorce decade spewing venom at each other, and resurrected this jolly family tradition more recently at my brother’s wedding. Then I found out my ex was engaged to another woman, what can only be described as, offensively soon after our break-up. While I was still licking my wounds and getting teary-eyed in Tesco’s bakery aisle - “She always loved a Multiseed Soft Bap” - she was planning floral arrangements. “Great,” I thought. “I campaigned for equal rights and now I’m being punished.” In all seriousness, I wish her every happiness. With her rebound. I shouldn’t have been surprised. Queer women are famous for moving at lightning speed: “Hi, nice to meet
you, never let me go.” First date: cat cafe, second date: Ikea to pick out furniture that represents you as a couple, third date: registry office in Brighton. However, anecdotal evidence (ok, Wikipedia) suggests that we’re just as quick to jump to the dump, with divorce rates for same-sex female couples far exceeding those for male or hetero pairings. Is Dyke Divorce set to become our next unwanted phenomenon, like Lesbian Bed Death or PMT Squared? Searching for answers and a glimmer of hope, I whack a callout on DIVA’s social media. “Have you been with your partner for more than 10 years?” I cry desperately into the online ether. “What’s your secret?!” I’m inundated with replies from lovely, loved-up couples eager to share their stories. They offer me gems of wisdom: never stop talking to each other, never go to bed angry. Laughter is vital, as is quality time and regular sex. Susanna and Lou met when they were 14 in science class and at 31, they are now married with a child. “Best friends support, love, encourage and respect you. If you marry your best friend, you get all of that,” they tell me sagely. “Add the attraction and you’re all set for a healthy, happy and long relationship. At least if the physical intimacy ever has glitches, you’re still married to your best friend until it resumes.” Claire and Helen have been together for 21 years, although it hasn’t all been plain sailing. Claire describes the moment she found out Helen had breast cancer. “I remember wanting to scream, ‘No!’ and cry. I looked at her, my eyes filled with tears. Helen smiled and said, ‘Be strong’.” Helen’s father was then diagnosed with cancer too and sadly passed away six months later. Four years on and despite their hardships the couple are together, healthy and happy. I’m curious to know how they’ve managed to stay so connected throughout it all. “We know when to give each other space or hold each other or laugh together or cry together. Most importantly we trust each other. She makes me feel safe and happy everyday.” I watch a documentary, The Devotion Project: Foremost In My Mind, starring Olympic medallist Gail Marquis and her wife Audrey Smaltz. Audrey is everything. She
ONE CYNICAL LESBIAN’S QUEST TO DISCOVER THE SECRET TO LONG-LASTING LOVE
WORDS ROXY BOURDILLON
has a flourishing fashion career, an infectious chuckle and a lilac scatter cushion emblazoned with the words “High Maintenance”. Gail is brilliant too and adorably enamoured with Audrey, who titters, “We’re not boring, Gail. That’s the one thing we are not.” Whenever they look at each other, they glow. At the time of filming Audrey is 75 and Gail is 57. I feel a pang. I want what they’ve got. I think about the lack of positive depictions of committed same-sex relationships, especially
Gail and Audrey
“I love my girlfriend but I’m not head over heels about getting hitched”
between older women, and how much we need to see them. I make a mental note to be more Audrey and to Google where I can get my hands on one of those fabulous cushions. So what have I learned from my marriage mission? The biggest secret is that there is no big secret. Laugh, talk, support, rinse and repeat. After all, hygiene is vital for long-lasting love. I share my findings with my girlfriend and ask how she thinks I should end the article. “With you being single,” she says helpfully. It’s ok, she’s kidding. I hope. I thought writing this would be a kind of marriage conversion therapy, that by bombarding myself with romance I’d start craving a fairytale ending. But this doesn’t end in a marriage, or a break-up (fingers crossed). It ends with the epiphany that I already have everything I need to make a relationship work. I’m going out with my best friend and I fancy her rotten. Just because I don’t currently feel an urge to put a ring on it, that doesn’t mean anything’s wrong with me or her or marriage. Maybe one day I’ll decide I do want a wedding after all and if so, splendid, pass the bubbly and let’s go frock shopping. If not, I’d like to make a toast anyway: “To love, happiness and human connection, wherever you may find it and however you choose to show it. Bottoms up!” Right, I’ve got to go now. I have a lot of making up to do. 51
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VERONICA FEARON Writing and women in London’s underworld
58
62
BELOW HER MOUTH
NICOLE FARADAY
Sexy, original and unwaveringly lesbian
We catch up with our favourite Bad Girl
PHOTO TEN SIX EIGHT PHOTOGRAPHY
CULTURE
Books Film TV Music
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“It’s very fluid. Your souls meet...”
53
| INTERVIEW | VERONICA FEARON |
W
hen Veronica Fearon debuted her first novel in 2014, DIVA readers flocked to hear her read from The Girl With The Treasure Chest. Led by the novel’s black lesbian antihero Dani, Fearon’s characters vividly evoked London’s gangland. Now Dani is back to protect the streets, herself and her reputation. DIVA: If you were going to option The Thirsty Stranger [your new novel] to a Hollywood film director, what would your elevator pitch be? VERONICA FEARON: In the first book in the series, The Girl With The Treasure Chest, we met Dani, a black lesbian who negotiates disputes between gangs in London. In the second instalment, The Thirsty Stranger, the reader sees our protagonist trying to improve her behaviour and settle down with the also deeply flawed love of her life, Susanna. Unfortunately there are opposing forces trying to bring Dani to her knees. I might also say “if you are tired of the formulaic macho, not-afraid-of-anything, canconquer-everything hero, I have in Dani a character who presents you with greater freedom and range in terms of what you can do with her. You might find yourself rooting for her no matter what she does.” I’m hoping the elevator is in a very tall building!
54 OCTOBER 2017
JANE CZYZSELSKA SPEAKS TO AUTHOR VERONICA FEARON ABOUT HER NEW NOVEL AHEAD OF HER APPEARANCE AT THE DIVA LITERARY FESTIVAL
“There’s a long way to go with female characters who seem all too expendable in mainstream work”
When we met you back in 2014 you told us about your background in criminal law and leaving Legal Aid to start your writing career. Tell us how you came to write novels? Once I had stopped working as a criminal lawyer I took some time out. I had not planned to write at all, but having time and space, the characters came to me one night as I was driving. In fact I played out a scene in my car, arguing between the two characters and went home and decided to write what had come into my mind. I didn’t stop for five years. At the moment Dani is still an important figure in my writing; she is keeping me busy. Since then, you’ve read around the country at Polari events and others. What has the public response to your work been like? I had never given any thought to how I would get my book in front of people. I remember my first reading in public; I was extremely uncomfortable. I felt completely exposed, but when I saw the response I grew in confidence. I have come to really enjoy reading passages or deleted scenes from my books. I try as much as possible to bring my characters to life at my readings so that people can get a feel for what it is I’m trying to convey. Paul Burston of Polari has been particularly supportive, as have a number of authors such as VG Lee and Kiki Archer. I am extremely grateful to them and
Publishers told you Dani would be better as a man, and readers would prefer the book to be written by a man! Have you self-published again? The Thirsty Stranger is also selfpublished. I decided I was happy with self-publishing and being my own boss and my own gatekeeper. I still feel there is a long way to go particularly with female characters who seem all too expendable in mainstream work. In Dani I’ve tried to make a rounded, flawed and complex character. The world you create in TTS is so vivid, and tough. How has working in London’s underworld affected you today? If anything the affect has been to educate me about the way so many parallel societies are running simultaneously, sometimes completely under the radar. Once you go into different worlds and experience different values and norms it becomes easier to understand people and harder to judge them. You use lots of fast dialogue which gives the story immediacy and an urgency to the emotional world of Dani and her friends – it’s powerful and assured storytelling. Can you say a bit about your style? I think my style of writing comes from the fact that I always read my work aloud to check the rhythm and dialogue until it feels right. I try to write and re-write until the words match as closely as possible with my visualisation of the events. Your characterisation shows us the humanity of people who are often demonised – either in the mainstream press or polite white society. Do you see Dani as an anti-hero? I absolutely see Dani as an anti-hero. I have really tried to create a character you can root for and be angry with at the same time. One of the main arguments that the book puts forward – that the whole series puts forward – is that good people are very capable of doing terrible things, and bad people are very capable of doing wonderful things. Understanding that helps
PHOTO SUMAN ZAMAN
No fear
of course DIVA for the support and encouragement given to me along the way.
people be less wary or afraid of those who appear different. In Dani’s world her crew treat her lesbianism as no big deal, affectionately even … That was in fact my experience of growing up as a young lesbian in London. I had lots of certain types of friends and only actually experienced homophobia when I moved into the world of employment. It was quite a shock to me as no one prior to this had ever been remotely interested in my love life. I wanted to show this aspect of my young life because it was something I can really appreciate now. The relationship between Dani and Susanna is a rollercoaster, and as they spar and negotiate the vicissitudes of the underworld, it builds up to a thrilling climax. What do you hope the reader comes away with at the end? I hope the reader comes away understanding that really bad events or circumstances can be the catalysts that produce amazing, unique traits or talents in people. I have always understood that you need plenty of dirt to grow the best flowers. Dani and Susanna’s relationship is struggling because of the dirt they both have but that also clearly gives them strengths that will hopefully help them in the future.
Veronica Fearon is appearing at the DIVA Literary Festival which takes place 3-5 November at the Hilton Metropole in Birmingham. For tickets and information, please visit divaliteraryfestival.com.
EXCLUSIVE SIGNED COPIES FOR DIVA READERS The Thirsty Stranger is available from Amazon for £11.99. However, DIVA readers can purchase exclusive signed copies direct from the author at danifenton375@gmail. com for £9.99 +p&p. (£1 from each DIVA sale will go to Fearon’s nominated charity, Plan International UK’s Because I Am A Girl campaign) The Girl With The Treasure Chest is available for £8.99 on Amazon. DIVA readers can buy a signed copy of the first novel in the series for £6.99 (charity donation applies), or purchase both books for £15 +p&p. 55
| CULTURE | BOOK REVIEWS |
FICTION
PERFECT RHYTHM Jae
BY KAITE WELSH
FICTION
SO HAPPY IT HURTS Anneliese Mackintosh
Anneliese Mackintosh’s searing debut novel is not a story that leaves you always rooting for the narrator. The reader is forced to watch as Ottila makes bad decision after bad decision or relives unpleasant memories with defiance and shame. And yet she is compelling, an accident we can’t look away from even as she starts to piece herself back together. The format, with conventional storytelling crammed in with receipts, emails, diary entries and transcripts from Ottila’s therapy sessions, creates a patchwork of a life constantly teetering on the verge of out-and-out chaos. Mackintosh manages to write a book that no one else could pull off with the same weird panache, peeling back the surface of her main character to expose all the blood and guts and mess beneath. Jonathan Cape, £14.99
FICTION
THE GROWING SEASON Helen Sedgwick
In Helen Sedgwick’s ambitious second novel natural childbirth is a thing of the past and what it means to have – and be – a family is changing, thanks to FullLife and their mysterious baby pouches. It’s fiction and science without ever really feeling like science fiction. Instead it brings to mind Margaret Atwood’s Gilead (The Handmaid’s Tale) or Orphan Black’s Dyad Institute, dystopian or futuristic worlds that look eerily like ours. Sedgwick, a former biophysicist, handles the ethics and possibility of new fertility technology admirably, cementing her reputation as one of the most important new writers around. Harvill Secker, £12.99 56 OCTOBER 2017
If lesfic has a rockstar, it’s the prolific Jae. Spanning genres from romance to crime, via supernatural and historical, her fan base is devoted enough that she could rest on her laurels. Thankfully, with Perfect Rhythm she is on top form. Jaded musician Leontyne Blake returns to her small Midwestern hometown and meets nurse Holly Drummond, who might be drawn to Leontyne but couldn’t care less about fame – or sex. Romances with asexual characters are still thin on the ground, but Jae handles it beautifully in an enjoyable love story between two very different women. Ylva, £8
FICTION
THE NIGHT BROTHER Rosie Garland
A must for anyone missing Sarah Waters’ foray into the Victorian era. In Rosie Garland’s third novel, siblings Edie and Gnome explore the delights of 19th century Manchester – he during the night, her during the day. The prose is lush and vivid as gender fluidity mingles with magical realism. Edie grows increasingly jealous of her brother’s freedom and exhausted by her double life and the restrictions society places upon her. In The Night Brother, Garland crafts a study in dualism that would make Henry Jekyll jealous, and establishes herself as one of Britain’s best new historical novelists. Harper Collins, £16.99
| CULTURE | FILM & ONLINE REVIEWS |
KEYED ALIKE
Director Chloe Thomas
Immerse yourself in Keyed Alike, a brilliant seven minute virtual reality film written and produced by Alex Ruhl and directed by Chloe Thomas. Two very different women, played by Gemma Whelan (Game Of Thrones) and Natacha Karam (Homeland) meet by chance, argue and tease each other about love. Does it last? Is it locked in time? Strap on your headset and find out. VR is still new and can often feel forced, but story here doesn’t need tricks or gimmicks to keep you hooked. Full marks.
BY CARRIE LYELL (FILM) AND ROXY BOURDILLON (ONLINE)
BATTLE OF THE SEXES Director Jonathan Dayton, Valerie Faris
The year is 1973, the sexual revolution is in full swing, and tennis star Billie Jean King is preparing for the match of her life against former champion and serial hustler Bobby Riggs in what became one of the most watched sports events of all time, captivating more than 90 million viewers across the world. Now audiences are being given a chance to relive the spectacle in a new comedy drama directed by Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris, starring Emma Stone and Steve Carell. Sport not your thing? Not to worry. This is about much more than tennis, and viewers will find themselves captivated by the blossoming romance between a closeted King and Marilyn Barnett, played by the wonderful Andrea Riseborough. Battle Of The Sexes is poignant, powerful and, if you’ll excuse the tennis pun, ace. Battle Of The Sexes premieres at the BFI London Film Festival on Saturday 7 October and is in cinemas across the UK from 24 November
Keyed Alike premieres at the Encounters Film Festival, 19-24 September in Bristol.
IN BETWEEN
Director Maysaloun Hamoud
BFI LONDON FILM FESTIVAL: DIVA PICKS
Mayasaloun Hamoud’s feature debut In Between tells the story of three strong, independent Israeli-Palestinian women sharing an apartment in Tel Aviv. Away from their families and the constraints of family and tradition, Laila, Salma and Nour have separate visions for their free and unfettered lives, but their plans are threatened by a shocking series of events that push their beliefs to the limit and change their lives forever. In cinemas 22 September
Battle Of The Sexes isn’t the only reason to catch the BFI London Film Festival 2017. The 61st edition of this cinematic extravaganza, which takes place 4-15 October, is packed full of queer gems including Anchor And Hope. Directed by Carlos Marques-Marcet, the film stars Oona Chaplin and Natalia Tena as a couple coming to terms with the death of their cat, and offers a fresh perspective on the classic rom-com. Elsewhere, Robin Campillo’s 120 BPM tells the story of Aids activists in Paris in the 1990s and has been described as a modern queer classic, while Close-Knit, directed by Naoko Ogigami, is a rich and beautiful story about a transwoman which subverts expectations. We’re also excited about Good Manners, A Fantastic Woman, and macabre coming-of-age Thelma which is as moving as it is chilling. Explore the programme and book tickets now at bfi.org.uk.
online PODCAST
WEBSITE
Stand-up comedian Cameron Esposito speaks to her fave LGBT people about queer identity, experiences and relationships. The first episode features a fascinating discussion with her wife and fellow hilarious human, Rhea Butcher.
A brand spanking new online mag for the modern queer, brought to you by the creators of Grindr. If you’re into LGBT culture, style, history and debate, it’s time to get browsing.
Follow gender non-binary model Madison Paige and you’ll discover a plethora of posts that are stylish, stunning and 100% addictive. Whether you’re searching for style inspo or a new crush, Mads is a must.
QUEERY
INTO
intomore.com
MADSPAIGE
instagram.com/madspaige
cameronesposito.com
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The goddess of authentic film Remember the French film, Blue Is the Warmest Colour? Many were outraged at the movie’s exploitation of its actresses and the multiple sex scenes in which the women seemed to be performing, not for each other, but for the male gaze. The film started a debate in our community: why couldn’t we make a sexy film of our own, authentically representing lesbian sex and desire? It turns out that Below Her Mouth was already in development when Blue Is The Warmest Colour made a splash at the Cannes Film Festival in 2013. Screenwriter Stephanie Fabrizi and her partner and producer, Melissa Coghlan, were determined to make Below Her Mouth as sexy, as original, and as unwaveringly lesbian as they could. Crewed entirely by women, many of them queer, the film passes the Bechdel test (the test that asks whether a work of fiction features at least two women who talk to each other about something other than a man – phew!) with flying colours and received an F-rating from the Internet Movie Database – F standing for female or feminist. Even better news for long-term survivors of bad lesbian movies, the dialogue is kept to a minimum, desire is at a maximum, and no one dies at the end! We spoke to the cast and crew to find out more.
ERIKA LINDER – DALLAS On playing Dallas: “Dallas and I are nothing alike. She’s tortured and doesn’t live her life authentically. She’s driven by her lust, rather than love. She only cares about herself and trying to maintain this tough facade. I mean, it was kind of a running joke on set that Dallas ‘got way more game’ than I do. I’m like a puppy in comparison. It wasn’t an easy thing to do, regarding the explicit content and the feelings I had to find within and bring out. Those pick up lines were pretty funny to deliver, but I’ve never used any lines like that in my life. I’ve also never gone to a girl party before, until the release of the 58 OCTOBER 2017
More information on p4 divadigital.co.uk
| CULTURE | BELOW HER MOUTH| film. My mum’s comment about the film was, ‘Dallas is cooler than you’. She apologised after saying it, but to me it was a winner. I think girls fall for the Dallas [and Shane McCutcheon] type because they have an ‘I dare you’ feel and look about them. Most people always want what they can’t have.” On how she handled those sex scenes: “When I first read the script, I got a bit scared, thinking ‘How the hell am I going to be able to pull this off?’ I didn’t know what it was going to look like on screen, or how they were going to shoot it, or who my co-star was. All these questions came to my mind, but I wanted to take my career to a new level and this was my first ever feature film. April Mullen [the director] was obviously very respectful during these scenes. We had a closed set, which means only Natalie, myself, April, the camera and sound. You’re just so in the moment anyway. You shut out. The blocking wasn’t that specific, and we were pretty much free to do our thing, to make it authentic. It was all about making us feel comfortable with each other and the environment around us.” On what the film has achieved, and what’s next for her: “Literally everyone on set was female, and I think more than 50% of the crew were lesbian. It makes it a huge contribution to lesbian filmmaking. This is obviously a very maledominanted industry, and the fact that all these women came together was a powerful thing. I’ve got the acting bug now. I’m taking classes and learning as much as I can about the craft. I just got an acting agency and a manager too. It’s all coming together.”
NATALIE KRILL – JASMINE On filming those sex scenes: “I have to give credit to the creative team – we felt like no one was watching so were able to be open ourselves, be present and take risks in the moment. I was pleasantly surprised about the genuine innocence, which sounds crazy because it is very sexual and explicit, but I just thought there was an innocence to it. My mum was my date for the Toronto International Film Festival, and after she saw it she just said, ‘Wow, that’s a lot for a mother to see her daughter do.’ But she was very proud of me. I’m from a very small town in the Canadian Prairies and I said to her, ‘What are you going to say to
HOW DO YOU CREATE A FILM THAT’S REAL AND HONEST WHEN WE’RE AUTOPROGRAMMED WITH THE MALE GAZE? MERRYN JOHNS FINDS OUT
everyone back home?’ She said: ‘I’m going to tell them to go see it.’” On playing a “straight girl” attracted to a lesbian: “I’ve never really been in a serious relationship with a woman, but attraction is really fluid. In terms of longterm relationships, I’ve always been with men. But I’ve definitely felt openminded about attraction. I connected personally with the truth that Jasmine finds within herself, trying to be what other people want her to be. My best friend came out about five years ago and I know the struggle that she went through, feeling that she needed to be with men, and how much she grew and blossomed into the person she really felt was right for her.” On what the film has achieved for women: “Everything about this project felt serendipitous to me. There’s a different energy to it, a different level of comfortability, kind of an intuition that women share and a level of support that you feel when you’re surrounded by women. I grew up with a mum who told me I could do anything. I love what our team did. Instead of just talking about it, they created the opportunity for an all-woman crew. I think as women we have to keep pushing and doing it and making the work for us.”
APRIL MULLEN – DIRECTOR
“I love what our team did. Instead of just talking about it, we created the opportunity for an all-woman crew”
On casting Erika: “It seemed very difficult to find someone who could walk into a room and every head turns. One day I was googling ‘fresh faces of 2015’ and there was a little black and white video clip of Erika walking around in a t-shirt, and she went, ‘Yo, that’s my audition’ and walked away. And I was like, ‘This is Dallas’. So I started researching and found out that she was this Swedish supermodel, breaking stereotypes and creating trends as genderless. She’d done a lot of still photography, but it’s a much bigger deal to be able to perform. At her chemistry read with Natalie, we were like: ‘This is them, it’s undeniable.’” On what the film achieves for queer women: “I really wanted to make the community proud, to do women proud, and give them something authentic that would resonate with them, something that was lacking on the screen.
Director April Mullen
When you’re behind the monitor and you’ve had these images in your head for a year, and you get to see them come to life, those moments are one in a million. Only film can do that. It’s like a goddess that I want to respect and amplify at all times.” On creating the female gaze: “When I first approached the sex scenes, I kept gravitating towards scenes that I had seen in film. We are surrounded by so much of the male gaze that it’s really hard to not have it affect you. If a woman is arching her back, is that something that I find attractive, or is that just something that has been told to me in every advertisement? I had to keep reminding myself: forget about what you’ve seen before, look deeper, challenge yourself to find something real. What really, actually, truly turns you on? What do you feel when you want to be intimate with someone? What is the female gaze? Just watch the film and you’ll know. The truth behind it is what the audience can feel. It strikes a chord and it’s something different from a stereotypical thing that’s meant to sell tickets. Every woman on the crew gave all of themselves and we really were fighting hard to find our voices and allow them to be.”
Below Her Mouth is streaming now on Netflix 59
| CULTURE | MUSIC REVIEWS |
DIVA DISCOVERS
CRYS MATTHEWS
BY HEATHER PEACE
TORI AMOS
ALOFBTHUEM MONTH
Native Invader
Tori Amos is one of the most prolific and influential artists of her generation. More than two decades after her debut studio album, Little Earthquakes, (number 27 on NPR’s Greatest Albums Made By Women) Amos’ work is as powerful as ever, and this – her 15th album – is an intense feast of melody, protest, tenderness and pain. In the summer of last year, she took a road trip through North Carolina’s Smoky Mountains with the intention of reconnecting with the stories and songlines of her mother’s family. That winter two seismic events knocked the plan off its axis – the fallout from the US election and her mother, Maryellen Amos, suffering a massive stroke that left her unable to speak. Of the album, Amos explains: “Hopefully people will find strength and resilience within the songs to give them the energy to survive the storms that we are currently in”. But for all its dark themes, this album is a joy to absorb, full of warmth and puzzles. Want to hear it live? Amos plays three UK shows this October in London, Manchester and Glasgow. Visit toriamos.com for dates.
FUZZY JONES
Leeds-based Fuzzy Jones is a Radio DIVA favourite, having featured as a DIVA Discovers and performed on the Heather Peace Presents stage at Manchester Pride this year. Her music, described as “junk shop folk” (also the title of her 2016 EP) is cool, effortless and catchy. Check out the new single Blue Jean (No.45), but also have a listen to This Ole Hammock which sounds like a classic. 60 OCTOBER 2017
ROMAN & RAVY
This duo, taking influence from likes of Missy Elliott, Run-DMC and Michael Jackson, released their self-titled debut EP in August. The lead track, Alright, features the hook “I may not be the richest but the pretty girls still ride with it” as Ravy raps from her perspective as a lesbian, having previously being told to hide her sexuality due to homophobia in the urban music industry. Good on her for following her heart.
Crys Matthews is the lesbian daughter of a preacher from the US’ South and tells unique stories through moving acoustic folk. We Must Be Free is a soul-tinged acoustic blues track and Crys’ response to the disproportionate loss of black lives at the hands of law enforcement in the US. Check out both her EP, Battle Hymn For An Army Of Lovers, and her LP, The Imagineers – ambitiously released simultaneously. The latter is a thoughtful selection of songs on love and life, while Battle Hymn For An Army Of Lovers tackles themes of social justice. Thoughtful, realistic and emotional, with comparisons to the likes of Toshi Reagon, Ruthie Foster and Tracy Chapman, Matthews’ songs remind us why music does indeed soothe the soul. VIDEO OF THE MONTH
ARIANA AND THE ROSE How Does That Make You Feel
Pop auteur and artist Ariana and the Rose has released a self-directed video for How Does That Make You Feel, a provocative and empowering track lifted from her debut EP, Retrograde. It features Ariana’s wispy falsetto, underpinned by percussion and atmospheric synths. “I wanted to explore the idea that a woman can be multidimensional, empowered, sexy, eerie and twisted all at once,” she says. “It only felt right that a song about owning who you are and your sexuality has a visual created with the same intention.” Check this out, it’s absolutely beautiful.
Join in h t i w n u f e th e, c a e P r e h t Hea y b l i W e i s Ro and some ! s t s e u g g n i amaz New Roving Reporter RACHEL SHELLEY Check radiodiva.uk to find out our upcoming live studio guests! Radio DIVA is co-produced and co-hosted by Heather Peace and Rosie Wilby
radiodiva.uk @radiodiva104_4
Introducing
DIVA Discovers Unsigned artists: send your tracks to heather@radiodiva.uk for a chance to hear them on Radio DIVA!
Tune in every Tuesday at 6.30pm (104.4FM and DAB in London) or stream the show online at player.resonancefm.com Catch up will be available at mixcloud.com/Resonance
Supported by:
62 OCTOBER 2017
subject we’re both passionate about. “At the time it was probably the best job to get as an actress – female run company, all female cast, really strong characters. It felt like you were part of something special. I’d done bits like the lap dancer, token girlfriend, token bimbo, and it was the first time I’d been given a really juicy, meaty role. God, I wish I hadn’t hanged myself in it! I was gutted when they killed me off. It’s all a lie when people say, ‘It was a mutual decision.’” She needn’t have fretted, as her standout performance as Snowball led to more acting jobs, including the coveted role of “ultimate Bad Girl” Shell Dockley in Bad Girls The Musical. I ask who she thinks would win Top Dog if Shell and Snowball went head-to-head and she gives the question the serious consideration it deserves. “Well, Snowball’s much more intelligent than Shell, but then Shell would go headlong into something and not think about the consequences… I’d like to think Snowball because she was my original character and she’s very clever and manipulative.” Nicole’s built a career playing bombshells and baddies on stage and screen, from songbird Eva Cassidy and movie star Marilyn Monroe in the West End – “You can’t really beat the feeling of there being a larger-than-life-size picture of you dressed as Marilyn Monroe coming out of the smoke on Shaftesbury Avenue” – to the Wicked Queen in the panto version of Snow White. It’s a part she’s already played seven times, with her eighth lined up this Christmas. So what’s the secret to portraying a convincing villainess? “My evil eyebrows.” She demonstrates by wriggling her perfectly plucked brows and it’s clear why she’s so regularly cast as the sinister temptress. Nicole began performing at an early age. “I was probably a nightmare! My first leading role was Princess Lotus Blossom in Aladdin when I was 12 years old. My sister was my flower girl. ‘Why am I the flower girl?’ ‘Cos you are! Shut up!’ A lot of people grow out of it and realise that they need to get a proper job. I just never did.” A gifted singer, she’s gigged everywhere from the Royal Albert Hall (“I stood in the wings thinking, ‘Why do I do this to myself?’”) to the Ella International Lesbian Festival in Mallorca. “It was set up by a girl I was at boarding school with. She was probably, well, not my first love, but my first female interest, as it were. It was before I really realised what I was.” She’s playing yet another femme fatale in the soon-to-be-released dark comedy film Ask The Cheat, starring alongside Martin Trenaman of The Inbetweeners fame and Nick Moran. “I play a school teacher who finds out her husband’s cheating on her with someone half her age. She takes revenge and gets one of the male sixth formers to help. We kidnap my husband and do terrible things to him. Yes, I am playing evil again. Don’t know why they thought of me for the role,” she titters. “I’m nice really!”
“At the time it was probably the best job to get as an actress”
PHOTO TEN SIX EIGHT PHOTOGRAPHY
For Nicole Faraday, Bad Girls was life-changing, and not just because her role as Snowball Merriman in the iconic ITV prison drama was her “big break”. “When I was growing up, I didn’t feel like it was a possibility to be in a lesbian relationship, even though I was attracted to women and I fell in love with women,” she tells me when we meet for a waterside coffee on a glorious sunny day in London’s St Katharine Docks. “Being in Bad Girls – a few of the cast are gay and there’s lots of gay storylines – made me feel like, ‘Actually this is a possibility. I could live my life like this.’” As a Larkhall superfan, I’m thrilled to be spending time with Nicole and she doesn’t disappoint, looking every inch the glamourpuss with her flowing maxi dress and trademark blonde locks. She has the deep but dulcet tones of someone trained in the art of musical theatre, and a delightfully filthy laugh. She’s also strikingly honest, describing her adolescence growing up in a “sleepy seaside town” with a “very middle-class” family. “I didn’t really know anyone that was gay. In my head I always thought, ‘One day I’ll meet a nice man, get married, have kids and live in a nice house’”. But like so many of us, myself included, Bad Girls, with its abundance of sapphic storylines, was a defining moment in her coming out journey. After she left the show in 2003, Nicole had a threeyear relationship with a woman, followed by a succession of romances with both women and men. She’s currently coupled up and “slowly but surely moving in” with her new partner, Lauren. “Now I’m fine about saying, ‘I’m in a lesbian relationship and I’m bisexual’. It doesn’t phase me a jot, the idea that I might spend the rest of my life with a woman. But in the past I was always worried what my family and friends would think. But they’ve been so supportive and they really, really love Lauren – Lolly, I call her.” Was Lauren a Bad Girls devotee before they got together? “No, she’s Australian,” explains Nicole, before admitting, “I forced her to watch it! I think she thought Snowball was… yeah, sexy. It’s always sexy being a baddie,” she chuckles knowingly. She confesses that this is the first interview in which she’s opened up about her bisexuality. “Not for any reason other than no one’s ever asked! I think it’s all very fluid. Your souls meet.” She then sounds off about the challenges that can come with being bi. “Not only do you get stupid straight men going, ‘Can I watch?’ or not taking it seriously like, ‘Oh yeah? You need a cock,’ all that horrible, hideous stuff, but you also get people within the gay community that are like, ‘Make your mind up’ or ‘You’re just greedy.’” What about professionally? Has she faced any prejudice within her working life? “Actually no, and I know some people are unlucky, but having trained in musical theatre and with the kind of jobs I’ve done, I haven’t had any reason to hide who I am. If I’m with a girl I’ll say, ‘This is my girlfriend’, if I’m with a boy I’ll say, ‘This is my boyfriend.’” Our conversation turns back to Bad Girls, a
| INTERVIEW | NICOLE FARADAY |
Femme Fatale
BAD GIRLS STAR NICOLE FARADAY TALKS TO ROXY BOURDILLON ABOUT BOMBSHELLS AND BISEXUALITY
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| CULTURE | TV REVIEWS |
COMING SOON
GENDERQUAKE
POFICTHKE MONTH
Sorry, what was that? We can’t quite hear you over the sound of One Mississippi, the dark comedy (or “traumedy”) based on the life of Tig Notaro, back for a second season. Fans of the first instalment will be pleased to hear the bulk of the narrative is still centred around stand up comic Tig, but the writers have also brought in different stories and experiences, giving the show more depth and drama. The result is the same show we loved last time – charming, funny and addictive – but with even more bite. Tig says: “I’m endlessly proud of what we did this time around and imagine you’ll really enjoy it too. Can’t wait to hear what you think!”
ON OUR RADAR
THE BOLD TYPE BY CARRIE LYELL
Streaming now on Amazon Prime Video
WHAT WE’RE WATCHING
STRICTLY COME DANCING
WE CAN’T WAIT FOR
THE MAGIC SCHOOL BUS RIDES AGAIN
If Lily Tomlin’s Ms Frizzle taught you everything you know about the human body, space and science, then climb aboard this iconic yellow bus and strap yourself in for an update of the much-loved animated kids show. Ghostbusters star Kate McKinnon voices new teacher Fiona Felicity Frizzle – Ms Frizzle’s little sister – in a sure-fire Netflix hit that will leave both children and adults educated and entertained. Come on bus, do your stuff! Netflix, 29 September 64 OCTOBER 2017
Sequins, stilettos, Susan Calman; it can only be Strictly Come Dancing. Still sweeping audiences off its feet after 15 seasons, BBC One’s awardwinning entertainment show has us especially hooked this year thanks to the inclusion of the Scottish comedian and former DIVA columnist, who is dancing with Kevin Clifton – the only professional dancer to reach four consecutive grand finals. So will he and Susan go all the way this year? #CalmanCanCanCan. Saturdays, 7pm, BBC One
We’ve been hearing great things about The Bold Type, a new US series inspired by the life of Cosmo’s editor-in-chief which has won praise from queer telly fans for its feminist credentials and lesbian story arc. Unfortunately the series isn’t (legally) available in the UK but fingers crossed it gets picked up by a broadcaster. Quick. NEWS
THE HANDMAID’S TALE
Channel 4 says it’s thrilled to announce they’ll be airing the second series of the dystopian drama. Based on Margaret Atwood’s novel of the same name, The Handmaid’s Tale has been C4’s most successful acquisition since Homeland, attracting an average consolidated audience of 2.3 million per episode.
PHOTOS AMAZON PRIME VIDEO, NETFLIX, BBC - RAY BURMISTON, FREEFORM, HULU
ONE MISSISSIPPI
A new 90 minute one-off programme exploring gender fluidity in the UK has been commissioned by Channel 4. Genderquake promises to “shine a light on the subject by bringing together people from across the gender spectrum” and will see 10 young people living under the same roof for a week. Watch this space for more info.
COMMUNITY
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“we now face the final frontier”
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Marguerite kayaking with Spank, the cat
LIVING HISTORY
66 OCTOBER 2017
T
he proverb “May you live in interesting times” has, to me, long felt like a blessing, but as I age it appears more like a mixture of a blessing and a curse. It seems a feature of old age to look back and reflect on one’s life, and lately I find I’ve been intentionally looking back in order to continue looking forward. I find I have a dawning awareness that I have indeed lived through an iconic time that now attracts much in the way of examination, depiction and imitation. This feels particularly the case regarding 1960s America and 1970s Britain. I’ve come to the conclusion that, at 65 years old, I am a piece of living history. And as I watch the mirror of my own advancing years reflected in the ageing faces of my
| COMMUNITY | LIVING HISTORY | loved ones (if they look old… so must I!), I realise that the experience of older age was something that the generations before me tried to convey, but I didn’t pay any attention. Things like the way time seems to speed up; and that you still feel emotionally the same inside, but that energy and stamina wane, even if you’re lucky enough to be in good health. When I “retired” from full-time employment, many friends of all ages asked me about my bucket list, which felt rather creepy, as though friends could see a ticking life-clock marking time over my head. In fact I’ve never been someone who needed prompting to delve into new experiences or new places in the world. I’ve followed my nose into many adventures and I hope that doesn’t end any time soon. As I write this, I have just emerged from camping in some of the most beautiful wilderness in the US state of Maine where moose, bears and coyotes outnumber the local human population. If I do now have an emerging impulse, (here’s my confession), I would like to do something out of character – to put myself forward to share aspects of my life experience that represent the sum total of my professional, creative and personal life, rather than writing about other people, factual situations, or as a representative of an organisation or cause. No matter how feminist my politics and lifestyle, this is no easy challenge. It feels very strange to be writing about myself and my opinions and yet, for decades, I’ve watched male colleagues and associates blithely take to the page or the stage and do just that. Now that I’m taking the first steps, I’ve realised that it takes a lot of confidence to admit shyness and do it anyway. I was born at the tail end of the post-World War Two baby boom in the US, when a large number of new families were created as a result of so many young men retuning from Europe and the Pacific. “Baby boomer” is now often used as a term of envy or contempt by younger Americans who feel that they will never achieve the standard of living enjoyed by that generation. While this isn’t the place for an economic analysis of the phenomena increasingly being described as the collapse of the
MARGUERITE MCLAUGHLIN, FORMER CEO OF THE METRO CENTRE, GREENWICH AND FERVENT LGBT AND FEMINIST ACTIVIST, WALKS US THROUGH THE HISTORY BOOKS AND EXPLAINS WHY OLDER GENERATIONS ARE OUR STRONGEST LINK TO THE FUTURE
“The ways we lived, worked, loved and expressed ourselves involved communal endeavour”
US middle class, I’ve long known I’ve had the good fortune to grow up as a White Anglo-Saxon Protestant in the most prosperous phase of modern American history. We children of that era benefitted from the fad for liberal child-rearing, seemingly endless and idyllic sunny summers, and a generally friendly attitude towards “kids”. We didn’t know we were living off the backs of much of the rest of the world’s people and resources until a proportion of us grew up, woke up and realised that the boys amongst us might be drafted and shipped off to Vietnam. My political education continued as I moved to the UK and, as time went by, I became involved in feminism, gay rights, Rock Against Racism, the Greenham Common protest, opposition to Clause 28… and if these examples aren’t familiar to you, there’s much to discover. These grassroots movements seeking real change and improvements in society were what kept me here in the UK in spite of the siren call of affluent America. We were all engaged in changing the world for the better – or at least trying by creating alternatives to the dominant culture in all realms of life. The ways we lived, worked, loved and expressed ourselves involved communal endeavour. We created the squatting culture, co-operative enterprises, feminist and LGBT movements, fringe theatre and performance art. This is really where the feeling of being “living history” comes in. The life I led in the 1970s, and that has shaped who I am, as well as shaping subsequent decades, is now being systematically archived and made available online. The feminist magazine Spare Rib was the first, undertaken by the British Library; and the innovative Performance Magazine has since been digitalised by the Live Art Development Agency. Four Corners Media is currently assembling the history of the influential Half Moon Photography Workshop and Camerawork magazine, and the London Metropolitan Archives has a hugely detailed collection of material from the infamous and wildly productive Drill Hall, the birthplace of queer theatre. The Feminist Library also has an important collection of feminist and lesbian small press publications. All of this material is vital to
preserve, if it’s not to be lost along with its creators. New audiences will emerge and it’s a real comfort to know that what all we produced is available as a resource. Reflecting on those days, and contributing to the process of preserving history, I’m aware that my colleagues, housemates, lovers and friends were able to live out our politics because we had access to inexpensive ways of living, plenty of job opportunities, cheap spaces to express our ideals and explorations of establishing publications, galleries and venues. In fact, the politics of space is an issue whose implications have really struck me. I can see that young people now, especially in big cities, are isolated from each other in real time, in real life (rather than online), and denied access to affordable space in which to live and create their own new visions. Add the high cost of living, student debt, the cult of the individual and the professionalisation of culture, and the arts and young people are seriously being disabled from a vital creative process. My generation has been lucky, but there is also sadness because while some great inroads have been made, other issues in LGBT rights remain unchanged, and rates of violence towards women have remained the same for 40 years despite tireless campaigning. I first began thinking about “living history” a while ago when I was asked if I’d seen the film JFK when it was released. My immediate response was that I’d seen it the first time. My younger friend looked puzzled, but what I meant was that, although I was a child at the time, I vividly remember John Kennedy’s election and assignation. Since then, many other films have made me feel the same, including biopics about Martin Luther King, Muhammad Ali, Margaret Thatcher and the Queen at the time of the death of Princess Diana. What we face now is a the final frontier – it’s time for creating alternatives to the way our population ages and this needs to be the focus for my generation so that we do not disappear into isolation like too much of the population does in later years. Older lesbians and bi women who have spent much of their adult lives engaged in activism are re-grouping 67
| COMMUNITY | LIVING HISTORY |
68 OCTOBER 2017
â&#x20AC;&#x153;I hope that we older women may forge dynamic and meaningful links and friendships with younger womenâ&#x20AC;?
under the banner of 70s Sisters, online sites like Meetup are being used to put people back in touch, and the recently launched charity, Opening Doors, offers support for older LGBT people and what in essence remains a grassroots DIY movement. It is my greatest hope that we as older women not only create new ways to address our new needs as we age, but that we may forge dynamic and meaningful links and friendships with younger women. Realistically there are two generations of feminists since my third-wave crew, and one of the increasingly mentioned wishes expressed by many of us in gathering back together to journey into old age is to connect to create richer lives for us all.
70s Sisters is an ad hoc network reconnecting women who were politically active in the UK in the 1960s and 1970s. To request a place on the mailing list please contact london70s_sisters-request@lists.riseup.net. Opening Doors London is an organisation that supports activities run by, and campaigns for, older LGBT people. See openingdoorslondon. org.uk or ring 020 7239 0400 for a paper copy of their events newsletter.
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You don’t need to have a security background to join us. What’s important here is your natural ability to look after our customers from all walks of life and from all corners of the globe. No matter where you come from or where you want to take your career, if you’ve got what it takes to make customers feel at home at Heathrow, we think you’ll help us deliver our vision of the best passenger service in the world. Explore our world at www.heathrowairport.com/careers
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LESBIAN PAGE-TURNERS
PHOTO SIAN DAVIS LICK SOCIAL & INSTA-WEDDING
WOMENONTOP
Author Clare Lydon on lesfic’s success story
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WHAT’S IT LIKE TO BE A... Wedding photograper? We find out with Shen Salih
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BEHIND THE LENS OF WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY
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Clare Lydon shares a word ahead of DIVA Literary Festival
Fantastic books find them Mutter the words “lesbian fiction” and most people conjure up an image of Sarah Waters and Jeanette Winterson, their books merging into a tale of religious fervour wearing a velvet top hat. For years this double act tap danced on the lesbian fiction stage alone, purely because theirs were the books that broke into the mainstream – but times, they are a-changin’. The digital revolution has flattened the publishing landscape, replacing it with a democracy that’s reader-driven. 72 OCTOBER 2017
CLARE LYDON TELLS US WHY LESBIAN FICTION HAS NEVER BEEN MORE POPULAR, WITH A WEALTH OF STORIES AND WRITERS
Now the gatekeepers are gone all voices can be heard and anyone can publish. More importantly, readers are voting with their buying finger – and when it comes to lesbian fiction, they’re clicking like crazy. The market has changed beyond recognition in the past 20 years and is now pulsing with possibility, as crime fiction author Val McDermid knows. “I grew up at a time when there wasn’t any templates for living a lesbian life unless you wanted to be called Steven,
wear a suit and kill yourself. So if I did think of anything in terms of the politics when I was writing, I suppose I wanted the next generation of lesbians to have something a bit more cheerful to read.” McDermid is referring to the 1928 classic, The Well Of Loneliness by Radclyffe Hall. As the title suggests, it’s not a rom-com and was banned in Britain for decades – not for being depressing, surprisingly, but for being obscene. Now being obscene in lesbian
PHOTO STEFANO MASSE
and where to
| WOMEN ON TOP | LESFIC | fiction is positively encouraged – it’s called erotica. But far from being a wealth of delicious smut, widely available if you fancy it, lesbian fiction now comes in all flavours. Just pick your genre and choose your own adventure. The stories being published cover the gamut of categories, including romance, crime, thriller, supernatural, horror, western, paranormal and young adult. What’s more, the lead characters are not purely lesbian – they’re also bisexual and transgender women, mirroring back our current world. Modern LBT fiction is a chance to redress the massive imbalance of history, where women have been depicted as mad, bad or just plain overlooked. Now LBT voices are not just being heard; they’re being bellowed in every corner of literature, and that can only be all sorts of fabulous. Crime fiction author Cari Hunter thinks so: “Lesbian fiction gives us a chance to see lesbians living their lives, doing their jobs, falling in and out of love, and not dying at the end of the story. I just want to see lesbian characters doing normal stuff without their sexuality being a big deal, because it’s not – or it shouldn’t be.” The lesfic explosion hasn’t just been brilliant for readers. Although being able to buy whenever, wherever, with your reading choices hidden on your device has certainly driven sales. The revolution has also allowed writers to bypass the publishers who said lesbian fiction doesn’t sell, and publish by themselves on Kindle, iBooks and more. Attitudes have changed and lesfic is no longer passed under tables in darkened rooms, writers are embracing it and the choices in lesfic have boomed. Romance author Georgia Beers agrees: “You no longer have to put all your eggs in the basket of a publisher, hoping that maybe, just maybe, you’re good enough to catch their eye. Now, those limits are gone. Anybody can put any of their work up for sale.” That’s exactly what I did in 2014 with my first romance, London Calling. It was the most nerve-wracking button press of my life, but it was also seismic. I wrote that book because all the lesbian romances I’d read up to that point were set in the US, and mainly featured cowgirls on ranches. I wanted to see books that reflected my experience,
“Modern LBT fiction is a chance to redress the massive imbalance of history”
as a thirtysomething lesbian living in London, so I decided to write one. I haven’t looked back, writing seven novels and a slew of novellas since. As Hunter echoes: “I got so sick of reading mainstream crime novels where the queer characters were either absent entirely or miserable and closeted, so I decided I’d write my own.” Hunter is published by Bold Strokes Books, one of the many USbased lesfic publishers – another way to get your words out to the world. Her crime thrillers are set in the north of England, and they’re gritty and witty – everything you want a crime thriller to be. We’ve come a long way since Radclyffe Hall’s seminal tome, since the lesbian pulp fiction of the 60s, and since Patricia Highsmith’s The Price Of Salt, which is noted as the first lesfic book with a happy ending. Now, LBT women everywhere can read stories that echo their lives and relate to characters just like them – and those characters act as friends, catalysts and inspiration. The next step is for the many writers currently making a living in lesfic to cross over to the mainstream and join Waters and Winterson on stage, still tap dancing for their lives. The DIVA Literary Festival’s headliners, Val McDermid, Stella Duffy, VG Lee and Kiki Archer, have all made the leap
into the mainstream fiction market to various degrees, but we need more to join them. More writers, more readers, more of everything. As Sheena Lemos Ebersohn, founder of The Lesbian Review, says: “A good book is a good book, regardless of who the leading lady likes to sleep with. Lesbians read about and watch heterosexual characters all the time, so why not the other way around?” The DIVA Literary Festival (3-5 November, Birmingham) is a gigantic step in the right direction for this to happen, showcasing a glittering array of lesfic talent, offering readers and writers a chance to come together and chat books. If that sounds like your perfect weekend, I hope to see you there where I’ll be on panels talking about romance and self-publishing. There’s never been a better time to be a lesbian fiction reader or writer, and things are only set to get better. See divaliteraryfestival.com for details.
Clare Lydon is a lesbian romance author and host of The Lesbian Book Club podcast. Her latest book, A Girl Called London, is out now. Find out more and get a free lesbian romance at clarelydon. co.uk/it-had-to-be-you.
WHAT DOES LESBIAN FICTION MEAN TO YOU? “Validity and company. It’s like kicking off your shoes and having a beer with old friends who understand your jokes and the significance of keeping your nails short. Never underestimate (like many who dismiss the romance genre) the power of seeing yourself deserve and achieve love and happiness in a novel. Lesbian fiction can act as a very healthy mirror, especially for isolated queer women.” Romance author Clare Ashton
“It means freedom and acceptance. It’s a space where I’m free to write the stories I want, that I know will be accepted with open arms by a community that is passionate about seeing LBTQ lives represented in our beloved books!” Crime author Wendy Hudson
“It’s a reflection of myself and my relationship, plus, as cheesy as it sounds, I do genuinely love to write about two women falling in love because we so rarely get to see it anywhere else.” Romance author Harper Bliss
“Lesbian fiction is the bringer of hope to women who just don’t fit into the world we are taught about – a world that is considered normal. It is a place where we can find acceptance and see people who are like us. When I first read a book about women who were like me, it was as if my entire world tilted. I was no longer a freak and that was a profound experience.” Sheena Lemos Ebersohn, founder of The Lesbian Review
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| WHAT’S IT LIKE TO BE A | WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER | and weddings. As a photographer you have a hands-on experience with the happy couple for the day, and in the run-up too, so you form intense one day friendships with them – and often some of the guests too – where you really do get to know about them. Most importantly, you share their special day. It’s a pretty wonderful feeling. What’s the worst thing about your job? How tiring it can be. It’s a long day; from bridal prep, to the first dance, and all the travelling. But adrenaline keeps me going, and knowing how happy the couple are going to be when I deliver their special pictures. What did you want to be when you were growing up? [Laughs] All sorts. I wanted to own an ice cream van and a sweet shop! I went from vet to lawyer and everything in
wedding photographer? Everyone loves a wedding. But 34year-old photographer Shen Salih from London loves them more than most, shooting nuptials up and down the country for her business, Shakey Face Photography, and as a freelancer for Insta Wedding. She let us peer down her lens at life behind the scenes. DIVA: What’s the best thing about your job? SHEN SALIH: Experiencing so much love. It sounds cheesy, but I love love 76 OCTOBER 2017
SHEN SALIH GIVES DIVA A CLOSE-UP OF LIFE AS A WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER
Has your sexuality or gender identity ever been an issue? Not to my knowledge, but I do panic when I’m shooting for Insta Wedding. Because I’ve had no contact with the couple until the week of the wedding, I flap “What if they’re homophobic?” So far I’ve been ok, although sometimes I do feel that the older guests can be a little prickly. I soon charm them! Did you ever have any doubts about being out at work? Sometimes I worry about the church ceremonies and the vicars judging me, but what can they do? Also, bridal prep can be awkward. I feel like saying now and again, “Don’t worry, I’m not perving on your boobs” when they’re getting their dress on! With some brides you build up a good bit of banter, so I just use my humour to make light of it.
between. Looking back, I often had a camera in my hand. My poor cat was constantly being chased by me and my camera! As I got older, I was always the mate with a camera on nights out. Thank goodness Facebook didn’t exist then! Photography wasn’t offered at school back then and it didn’t occur to me at 16 that it could be a career – it took me until I was 25 to realise it was the path I wanted to take. What’s been the biggest challenge in your professional life? To be totally honest, it’s self-doubt and anxiety. I struggle with both daily; I think most artists do, but I try not to let it get the better of me. I have a wonderful support network. My wife, mum, sister and friends are always there when I’m worried that “I’m just not good enough”. I also still haven’t quit the day job so that’s a big hurdle.
Where do you see yourself in five years? I’d love to be doing weddings/events full time. I’d hope by then my business will have grown enough to allow that. I’d move to be by the sea with my wife and cats. I can be based anywhere for photography, so that’s a huge bonus. What one superpower would make your job easier? The ability to fly, then I could get to/ from weddings and between venues super-fast and get the most coverage possible. How do you measure success? Simple – happiness! If me and everyone I love are happy, that’s the best life right there.
Check out Shen’s work at facebook.com/ shakeyfacephotography and insta-wedding.co.uk
PHOTOS SIAN DAVIS LICK SOCIAL & INSTA-WEDDING
What’s it like to be a…
What’s the funniest thing that’s happened to you at work? When a colleague outed me at the dinner table to the vicar and his wife! I was freelancing for Insta Wedding and one of their other freelancers decided to tell them how iconic my own wedding had become. Why, the vicar asked? “Well, there were two awesome brides for a start”, she replied. He didn’t know what to say to that; I think he almost choked on his dinner, and it went very quiet around the table!
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A LIFE-CHANGING RIDE
TRAVEL
Travelling along the Trans-Siberian railway
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WHERE TO HONEYMOON
FIRST CLASS
Our top five places to explore with the lady you love
Make the most of your holidays with DIVA’s travel tips
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bucket list: “300 things to accomplish before 40”
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| TRAVEL | TRANS-SIBERIAN EXPRESS |
Russia Perm
Moscow
Kazan
Krasnoyarsk Novosibirsk
Irkutsk
Ulan-Ude
Ulaanbaatar
Mongolia Beijing
China
Next stop on a life-changing journey Turning 30 was a wake-up call. Six years after leaving the Royal Navy a black cloud of depression had slowly crept up on me, to the point where I found it terrifying to even leave the house. Considering that I had been on active duty in the Gulf during the second Iraq War, the dread of facing the outside world was new and confusing. Confronting this fear, as well as a new decade, and in a bid to motivate myself, I decided to write a bucket list of 300 things to accomplish before I turned 40. I started small – the first thing on my list was to wax my legs. Still unable to leave the house, my neighbour’s daughter did this for me. It hurt like crazy and afterwards I wished I’d asked her to just do my eyebrows. But it was a tick on the list. As I continued to complete challenges – from holding a tarantula to releasing a song (House 78 OCTOBER 2017
TRAVELLING ALONG THE TRANSSIBERIAN RAILWAY, VICKY JONES DISCOVERS A RENEWED SENSE OF PURPOSE AMIDST THE BEAUTIFUL LANDSCAPES OF RUSSIA, MONGOLIA AND CHINA
of Cards, in aid of the charity Wipe Homophobia) – I discovered a book about walks off of the beaten track. This encouraged me to get out of the house without worrying about running into people. Exploring new places, my long-lost adventurous spark ignited, and after some time I even felt ready to venture further and visit family in Canada. The trip gave me a new sense of accomplishment and before I knew it, I was addicted to travel. Within the space of three years I visited Iceland, Alaska, Hawaii, New Zealand and Cambodia, but one big bucket list adventure remained. So in June I flew to Moscow for an adventure on the Trans-Siberian Express.
MEETING MOSCOW Organised by On The Go Tours (onthegotours.com), this trip wasn’t like anything I had experienced before,
and I felt a little nervous. My girlfriend Claire and I started by exploring the Russian capital with our guide Kostya, who proved particularly useful when navigating the metro. Together we saw the Red Square, the Kremlin, Lenin’s Mausoleum and the striking St Basil’s Cathedral. A river cruise along the Moskva River gave us a different perspective as we floated past stunning architecture and the famous Gorky Park, an amusement park from the 1920s. After our third day in Moscow it was time to board the Trans-Siberian Express for a five-day journey across Russia, Siberia and Mongolia, all the way down to China’s capital Beijing. We had requested a two-berth cabin and were given one in the first class carriage, which we were really excited about. However, once on the train we realised it wasn’t exactly what we had
VICKY’S TIPS
FOR ASPIRING BUCKET LISTERS “People may think that a bucket list means you have to start with a grand gesture, like a skydive, but you don’t. Start small, taking one step after the other, and things can get better. I am proof of that.”
expected – first class simply meant we had a room to ourselves. Having unpacked, made up our bunks and come to terms with the fact that the shared toilet flushed directly onto the tracks, we found our stay to be simple but cosy.
MAGICAL MONGOLIA
“The more I travelled, the more my confidence and curiosity grew”
We woke up at dawn to the most beautiful scenery. Lush green fields and small villages passed by our window and every three hours or so we pulled into a station where we could jump off, stretch our legs and nip to the kiosk for provisions. Watching the world go by, we spent our days reading, relaxing and taking it all in. Lake Baikal in Siberia was a particular highlight; it is so vast that we felt like we were travelling along the coast. After five days, and a drawn-out border crossing, we were exhilarated to finally enter Mongolia. Here the rolling hills changed into a stunning landscape, complete with beautiful granite rock formations breaking up the green steppe. To break up our journey we booked an add-on experience in the Gorkhi-Terelj National Park, where we stayed in a homely traditional ger (a Mongolian yurt), complete with handpainted furniture, a wood-fired stove and hand-carved beds. Here we were treated to authentic Mongolian mutton stew and yak milk tea, the latter of which was, let’s say, an acquired taste. After two nights in our ger, we moved on to the capital of Ulaanbaatar and stayed at Hotel Nine (hotelnine.mn), perfectly located in the heart. Their showers proved very welcome and we enjoyed strolling around the area, marvelling at huge bronze statues of Genghis Khan. We absolutely loved our
time in the Mongolian capital. A highlight was BD’s Mongolian Barbecue restaurant (modernnomads.mn), whose cookery show is very entertaining.
REACHING THE FINAL STOP Only one more night on the train remained before we arrived in Beijing, where the heat that met us on the platform almost floors you – but it wasn’t just the heat that was intense. China is the busiest country I have ever visited, and we were glad to see our Chinese rep Sunny and her driver, who navigated their way through the Beijing rush hour with skills the Stig would be proud of. The first night was spent literally chilling out at Yong’an Hotel (yonganhotelbeijing.com). The following days we braved the heat, visiting the Summer Palace, the largest royal park in China, complete with lakes and temples, as well as the Forbidden City and Tiananmen Square – rooted in history, not least because of the famous photograph of a student standing in front of a tank following the Tiananmen protests of 1989. It was a breathtaking experience, but the highlight of my Trans Siberian adventure was walking along the Great Wall. It is hard to adequately capture in words, but standing on it I felt both spiritual and insignificant, dwarfed by its size and scale. The higher up we went, the more magnificent the scenery became and although the heat made it difficult to walk too far, it was magical. Standing there, looking back at my journey, I realised that the more I travelled, the more my confidence and curiosity grew. I felt that slowly, that black cloud of depression was lifting. Six years ago I couldn’t step out of my front door, yet here I was, working my way around the incomprehensible Russian metro system, eating Mongolian barbecue and drinking yak’s milk. And to top it all off, standing on the Great Wall of China, realising how proud I was of myself for deciding to pluck up the courage to take the first step on the journey that brought me here. And it isn’t over yet.
Next on Vicky’s bucket list is her debut novel, Meet Me At 10, out 10 October. Follow Vicky on Twitter @VickyJones7. Struggling with mental health? Contact Mind (mind.org.uk) or the Samaritans (samaritans.org) for an informal chat. 79
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| TRAVEL | RAINBOW HONEYMOONS | ARUBA Aruba is a proudly diverse and LGBT friendly destination despite being surrounded by traditionally less-thanqueer-friendly neighbour states. This tiny island in the Caribbean offers stunning beaches for snorkelling and turtle spotting and glorious sunshine, as well as plenty of sightseeing and history for those who get itchy feet. Stay at the beautiful eco (and gay) friendly Bucuti & Tara Beach Resort (bucuti.com) where you can sunbathe on the beach, pamper yourselves in the spa and have candlelit dinners under the stars – the ultimate luxury Caribbean honeymoon experience.
ARGENTINA
Fly away: (clockwise, from the top left) Wythe Hotel in Brooklyn, Bucuti & Tara Resort in Aruba, Casa de Uco in Argentina and Dream Hotel in Phuket, Thailand. Centre: Northern lights viewed from Iceland
Rainbow honeymoons One of the best things about marrying the woman you love is that right after you throw a big party for all your friends and family, you get to debrief and de-stress together on your holiday of a lifetime. Whether your idea of honeymoon heaven is lounging on a beach in tropical sunshine, sipping glamorous cocktails on a big city rooftop or putting those hiking boots on and heading for the hills, here’s our roundup of some of the best honeymoon destinations out there.
BROOKLYN, NEW YORK The city that never sleeps is perfect for dynamic honeymooners and Brooklyn (dubbed the “lesbian capital” of NYC) is an amazing place to visit for newly-wives. Stay at the Wythe Hotel (wythehotel.com), a converted factory in Williamsburg that has arguably the best rooftop for drinking in the area. While you’re there you can grab a bagel at The 82 OCTOBER 2017
CURRENTLY PLANNING HER OWN WEDDING TO LONG-TERM GIRLFRIEND JEN, LAURA KAY GUIDES US THROUGH HER TOP FIVE DREAM RAINBOW HONEYMOON DESTINATIONS
Bagel Store (thebagelstoreonline.com) on Metropolitan Avenue, home of the rainbow and unicorn bagel, take a romantic stroll round Prospect Park and hop on the train to Manhattan to take in a Broadway show. If you go in the summer you can take the train to Coney Island and add on a beach holiday just an hour out of the big city.
ICELAND If you’re dreaming of escaping to the wilderness post-wedding then Iceland could be the one for you. Go between September and mid-April and you might be lucky enough to catch the Northern Lights, but there’s plenty to explore for an adventurous couple all year round. If you want an upscale base in Reykjavik then stay at the gorgeous Hotel Borg (keahotels.is/en/hotels/hotel-borg), or if you fancy something more remote then Hotel Ranga (hotelranga.is) in South Iceland offers stunning views in close proximity to black sand beaches, hot springs and caves.
After legalising same-sex marriage in 2010, Argentina is considered one of the most advanced countries in the world when it comes to LGBT rights. It also just so happens to be one of the most beautiful and interesting places on this planet, making it perfect for a honeymoon retreat. If staying in the hustle and bustle of Buenos Aires is your thing then check in at the grand Alvear Palace (alvearpalace.com). You’ll be close to museums, bars, restaurants and, of course, many clubs in which to practise your Argentine tango. If you fancy seeing the wine country then check out Casa de Uco (casadeuco.com) in beautiful Mendoza. You can take in the mountain vistas and vineyards from your bathtub, try wine tasting or, if you’re feeling adventurous, go horseback riding through the valley. Argentina has something for everyone.
THAILAND Thailand is a great shout for any honeymooners looking for good food, culture, stunning beaches and amazing, diverse nightlife – and Phuket a is go-to destination for LGBT travellers in Southeast Asia. A stay at Pride-friendly The Dream Hotel & Spa (dreamhotels.com/phuket) in Phuket promises to be just that. Enjoy cocktails and yoga on the rooftop, a swim in the pool and stunning beach views at this luxury abode. What’s more, there’s loads to see and do in Phuket, including canoeing tours, visiting temples or caves and taking in a cabaret show. This is a trip for foodies with lots of opportunities to tour around the island and try different local cuisines. Truly dreamy!
| TRAVEL | TRAVEL PRIDE
WORLD PRIDE 2019: NEW YORK
#DIVAMAGTRAVEL
ON TOP OF THE WORLD
Just about recovered from the amazing event that was World Pride in Madrid, it is time to start planning for the next one: New York in 2019. Marking the 50th anniversary since the Stonewall uprising, this global gathering promises to be nothing short of huge, and will go by the theme of Millions of Moments of Pride, celebrating the people, the stories and the love that embodies the spirit of New York. We can’t wait!
Social media executive Emily Moulder and her girlfriend Rhiannon went to Norway for Emily’s birthday last year and they took this super sweet picture at the top of the famous ski jump Holmenkollen. “It’s an incredible place where you can get stunning 360 views of Oslo,” says Emily, adding that Norway was gorgeous – and icy. “If you go in the winter, pack thermals. It’s colder than British winters and can be a bit of a shock.” However, it’s worth it – Emily says the locals are very helpful fluent SEND US YOUR English speakers, and that , TRAVEL HACKS there is a great gay bar in & S ON TI ES QU Oslo called London Pub ES! PICTUR EMAIL TRAVEL (londonpub.no). “We @DIVAMAG.CO.UK went on a karaoke night OR TWEET @BELLAQVIST and it was so fun!” Follow Emily on Instagram @moulder5000 if you like theatre, travel and being out and about in London.
nycgo.com/worldpride
BY BELLA QVIST
TRAVEL NEWS
VAPE NO MORE
PHOTO INSTAGRAM @MOULDER5000
Swapped smoking for vaping? Heading to Thailand? Then make sure you leave your e-cigarette at home. The British Foreign Office has issued a travel warning stating that you can’t bring vaporisers (like e-cigarettes and e-baraku) or refills into Thailand. “These items are likely to be confiscated and you could be fined or sent to prison for up to 10 years if convicted,” it warns, adding that several British Nationals have been arrested for possession. The sale or supply of e-cigarettes and similar devices is also banned. On the plus side, could a trip to Thailand be a good excuse to break the habit? See gov.uk/foreign-travel-advice for up to date travel advice.
Travel Hacks: bags reviewed
REVELATION LONDON ECHO SUITCASE Travel test: London to Costa Rica, and back A bag can make or break any trip, which is why we are kicking off a new series testing the best bags out there for you. First up is a suitcase sure to brighten anyone’s day. Having had some trouble picking among the many Revelation suitcase designs available, I fall in love with the Echo Blue bag as soon as it arrives. This is much more fun than my dull, old one. The medium-sized case is smaller than I would have wanted for a long haul journey (some of us struggle with the concept of packing light), but it fits everything I need for a trip that includes a conference, a jungle hike and a beach holiday – not to mention all my toiletries. I’m impressed. Rolling it along, the bag is light and the 360 rotation wheels are great, but they do slightly turn inwards, meaning I have to keep pulling it back. The low price point, however, makes up for this and a somewhat plasticky feel. The case is scratch resistant and I do love seeing this bright blue splash of colour appear on the conveyor belt.
Retail price: £59 Value for money: 5/5 Style: 5/5 Durability: 3/5 Comfort: 4/5 Practicality: 3/5 Overall: 4/5 The perfect suitcase for a city break or beach holiday
revelationlondon.com
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DIVA LITERARY F E S T I VA L & AWA R D S 3, 4 & 5 NOVEMBER 2017 Hilton Metropole Hotel, NEC, Birmingham
Celebrating the very best writing from lesbians and bisexual women VAL MCDERMID - MARI HANNAH - STELLA DUFFY KIKI ARCHER - SOPHIA BLACKWELL VG LEE - LUCY SUTCLIFFE HORSE MCDONALD - PHYLL OPOKU-GYIMAH AWARDS HOSTED BY HEATHER PEACE SATURDAY NIGHT CABARET HEADLINED BY LUCY SPRAGGAN
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DIARY
DIVAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s monthly pick of the best events
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WEDDING FASHION Fix up, look sharp!
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CROSSWORD
Test yourself with our cunning crossword
PHOTO ANDREW EDGECUMBE
LIFESTYLE
Diary Wedding Fashion Horoscopes Crossword
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lucy spraggan hits the road
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DIARY
September/ October
22.09
THE REST OF ME FLOATS
Rose Lipman Building, London
Weaving together autobiographical performance, movement, pop songs, stand-up and dress-up in an anarchic celebration of the body, And The Rest Of Me Floats is a bold, exciting and experimental piece of theatre made by an extra-fierce company of talented performers. tinyurl.com/y8dgczhr
BY DANIELLE MUSTARDE
23-24.09
FLUID FESTIVAL
THE DAYS MIGHT BE SHORTER, BUT OUR EVENINGS JUST GOT LONGER WITH PLENTY TO DO BY DAY, OR AFTER DARK...
Various venues, Birmingham
A weekend of new queer sound and music featuring an extraordinary line up of composers, performers and experimental musicians, plus special guests MATMOS live from their studio in Baltimore, US. fluidfestival.org
23.09
BRIXTON DYKES
Windrush Square, London
From Olive Morris and Brixton Black Women’s Group to the Rebel Dykes of the 1980s, Brixton has a long and powerful history of queer squatting. Back by popular demand, this interactive walking tour aims to bring queer history alive. tinyurl.com/ycb55sf3
24.09
LAUGHING COWS
Tribeca Bar, Manchester
26.09
LUCY SPRAGGAN
The Live Rooms, Chester
What a year 2017 has already been for Lucy Spraggan. And now Sheffield’s favourite singer-songwriter, who bagged her fourth top 30 album earlier this year, is on tour across the UK and Europe. Catch her while you can! tinyurl.com/ybvvofvw
86 OCTOBER 2017
WHAT’S ON WHERE YOU ARE?
Send your listings to danielle@divamag. co.uk or tweet direct to @daniellejournal
The longest running comedy club with an all-female line up anywhere in the UK, possibly Europe, maybe even THE WORLD. Get your lady-shaped laughs right here. tinyurl.com/y7xev5vn
26.09
LGBT BRITAIN ON FILM The Showroom, London
An evening of archive film screenings, including some of the earliest known representations of LGBT people on screen. tinyurl.com/y8ymtjxw
| DIARY | LISTINGS |
14.10
WANNA BE ON STAGE?
The Marlborough, Brighton
Have things to say, show and share? Team Bar Wotever will help you get on stage in a safe and supportive environment. This easy and friendly workshop aims to help more LGBTQI+ folk share their stories. You got this. tinyurl.com/ydeht57q
07.10
LATE NIGHT LIBRARY CLUB Sutton House, Hackney
Celebrating Jeanette Winterson’s Oranges Are Not The Only Fruit, let Late Night Library Club add a touch of trash and a splash of camp to your usual booze-ormoth-fuelled monthly book club. With performances, interaction, drinking and dancing. Dress-up highly encouraged. tinyurl.com/y7yrkun3
08.10
THE GAY WEDDING SHOW Hilton Doubletree, Manchester
27.09
THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID The Book Club, London
Back from Ed Fringe and raring to go, For Books’ Sake’s night of spoken word is here to welcome a wide range of speakers, from slam poetry to storytelling. Bringing women’s voices to the forefront with writer Lisa Luxx, Amber Agha and more. tinyurl.com/y7wwbfug
29.09
PITY LIKE: CLUB CHAI
Audacious Art Experiment, Sheffield
A queer club night all about inclusion, talent and rejecting binaries, expect hybrid club music and LGBTQ artists from this Club Chai takeover. All and no genders are very welcome. tinyurl.com/yb7bq9hu
30.09
LOCK UP YOUR DAUGHTERS Drygate, Glasgow
Come and dance one last time before the Scottish Queer International Film Festival (SQIFF) shuts up shop for another year. With fresh queers, craft beers and butt-thumping beats. sqiff.org/event
The UK’s national LGBTQ wedding show is coming to Manchester! Celebrating their 14th year, The Gay Wedding Show helps you and yours discover great ideas to make your big day extra, super spesh. tinyurl.com/y9sukrtx
11.10
LGBTQ JOGGING TOUR
Outside St. Bride’s Church, London
Fancy getting buff while exploring 3000 years of LGBTQ history? Look no further, friends. Stopping at places of interest along the way, this slow and steady jog will reveal queer stories from as far back as 1200 BC. And best of all? £2 from every ticket sale will be donated to the Albert Kennedy Trust for homeless LGBT youth. tinyurl.com/y7rvzzwa
15.10
13-15.10
THIS IS WHO I AM Safehouse 1, London
This first Flux Presents event will showcase the work of Suzie Pindar, aka The Naked Artist (ooo-er). Pindar’s art is explorative in the physical sense, as she often uses her own body to express her thoughts. Honest and bursting with feelings and memories, Pindar’s art will get you thinking. tinyurl.com/ydz7sttj
(SPOOKY) FEMME SINGLES Bar Humbug, Bristol
Shiver in sheer delight as you spot her across the room for this Halloween edition of Femme Singles! Don’t feel like splashing out on fancy dress? Just wear your usual gorgeous glad rags. There will be prizes. There will be ice breakers. There will be lots of scarily gorgeous femmes. tinyurl.com/yb3j9wzj
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SAY “I DO” TO FOUR FAB PAGES OF WEDDING FASHION Choosing what to wear to your wedding can be as daunting as popping the big question. You’re bombarded with suspiciously similar puffy white gowns, but what if your number one aim in life isn’t to resemble a radiant meringue from Planet Bridezilla? No shade, that’s a perfectly respectable goal, but now you’re drowning in mountains of identi-kit ivory chiffon and breaking into panic sweats! Take a deep breath and relax because we’ve selected a range of stylish options to save you time, stress and frantic Googling. So whether you’re the butchest bride going, a genderqueer style maverick, grand mistress of the femmes, or you just want something half-presentable that doesn’t require the selling of any vital organs to pay for it, Queerella, you shall go to the ball. And you’re going to look magnificent...
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Fashion forward
You’re a complete original and envision a look that showcases your flair
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CHI CHI CURVE HELOISE DRESS
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AYBREE EMBELLISHED MAXI DRESS
UK 18 - 26 £70, Chi Chi London, chichiclothing.com
C LUB L ALLOVER LACE FISHTAIL MAXI DRESS UK 6 - 16 £40, ASOS, asos.com
UK 6 - 16 £185, Frock and Frill, frockandfrill.com
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BIEN BRIDAL JUMPSUIT
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SIMONE BY ALAN HANNAH
Made to measure £1150, House of Ollichon, houseofollichon.co.uk
GLISTENING GRACE
UK 4 - 32 £2150, Platinum by Demetrios at Rispin Couture, rispincouture.com Made to measure £2900, Rispin Couture, rispincouture.com
WORDS ROXY BOURDILLON
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| LIFESTYLE | WEDDING FASHION |
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Femme fairytale
You’re a glamazon and your wedding day is just one more chance for you to slay
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A SOS BRIDAL TRUMPET HEM MAXI DRESS
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ALERIE DRESS
UK 4 - 18 £200, ASOS, asos.com
UK 6 - 16 £68, Chi Chi London, chichiclothing.com
CLEMENTINE BY ALAN HANNAH
Made to measure £2700, Rispin Couture, rispincouture.com
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HAMMOND
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TEALA EMBELLISHED BODICE BRIDAL DRESS
Made to measure £355 (top), £495 (skirt), House of Ollichon, houseofollichon.co.uk
C HARLOTTE BY SILHOUETTE AT ROMANTIC OF DEVON
UK 18 - 34 £1255, Rispin Couture, rispincouture.com UK 6 - 16 £1500, Ted Baker, tedbaker.com
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SARONG WHITE SATEEN
Waist size 24” - 34” £120, Vivien of Holloway, vivienofholloway.com
FATALE EMBROIDERED PROM DRESS
UK 8 - 20 £315, Pretty Dress Company, theprettydresscompany.com 89
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Budget beauty
It’s all about the love you have, not the dosh you don’t
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A SOS CURVE BRIDAL SOFT DRAPE FRONT MAXI DRESS
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EMBELLISHED PEPLUM MAXI WEDDING DRESS
UK 16 - 28 £95, ASOS, asos.com
UK 8 - 14 £89, Goddiva, goddiva.co.uk
MAYBELLE WHITE JACQUARD TWIN SET UK 8 - 26 £55, Lindy Bop, lindybop.co.uk
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ALLEGRA EMBELLISHED FISHTAIL MAXI DRESS HITE TUXEDO JACKET AND WHITE W SKINNY CIGARETTE TROUSERS
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DIAMOND TUXEDO
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UK 4 - 16 £180, Miss Selfridge, missselfridge.com
UK 4 - 16 £35 (jacket), £30 (trousers) Missguided, missguided.co.uk US 0 - 20 £113 (jacket), £75 (trousers), Little Black Tux, littleblacktux.com
I VORY URSULA CROSS-OVER BUST WEDDING DRESS
UK 16 - 32 £125, Lady Vintage, ladyvlondon.com
1950s HALTERNECK CIRCLE POSY LACE IVORY DRESS
Waist size 24” - 34” £120, Vivien of Howlloway, vivienofholloway.com
PHOTOS J S COATES WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY AND ROO STAIN WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY, S6 PHOTOGRAPHY
| LIFESTYLE | WEDDING FASHION |
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Sapphic suits
Try these if you want to look dapper and feel like a boss
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BLACK SUIT WITH SATIN COLLAR
UK 4 - 14 £199 (jacket), £145 (trousers), The Kooples, thekooples.co.uk
GARSON WINGTIP TUXEDO SHIRT US S - 5XL £120, Haute Butch, hautebutch.com
BLACK TUXEDO
US 0 - 20 £113 (jacket), £75 (trousers) Little Black Tux, littleblacktux.com
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BESPOKE SUIT
Two piece suits from £1150, three piece suits from £1350 The Butch Clothing Company, thebutchclothingcompany.co.uk
BESPOKE TAILORING
Made to measure Prices upon request, Orhan, orhanlondontailoring.com
BESPOKE SUIT
Made to measure Modern bespoke suits from £499, traditional bespoke suits from £899, King & Allen, kingandallen.co.uk
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BESPOKE SUIT
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BESPOKE TAILORING
Made to measure Modern bespoke suits from £499, traditional bespoke suits from £899, King & Allen, kingandallen.co.uk Made to measure Prices upon request, Orhan, orhanlondontailoring.com 91
| LIFESTYLE | WEDDING FASHION |
&booted
Suited
It’s true what they say – clothes do maketh the man butch. Wherever you sit on the masculinity scale – transman, transmasc, butch or boi, there are outfits that can make you soar through the day feeling like Leo DiCaprio or KD Lang. And equally, there are clothes that cause you to curl up like an old Quaver. Remember The L Word episode where Shane has to wear a dress? Yeah, that. Butch is an internal attitude as well as an outward presentation and the right outfit effortlessly fits your gender identity. Butch and engaged? I bet your search history is fast filling up with butch wedding fashion pages. As a hopeless romantic butch myself I decided to do some digging on your behalf and chatted to some butches in the know about ties and pocket flowers. K.Michelle founded butch fashion emporium HauteButch (hautebutch. com) after growing tired of wearing “ill-fitting men’s clothes”. HauteButch sells clothes exclusively designed for the masculine-identified butch, and even has a whole section dedicated to wedding suits. Hurrah! “I started as a result of both my own experience and the expressed frustration of other women that felt a need for clothing that fit their own personality and style,” says Michelle. “I wanted clothes that expressed who I was internally. Inside I was a confident, capable, fearless butch with a swagger that walked the fine line of tough and tender... yet my wardrobe didn’t express it.” Michelle feels her most sexy in “a crisp, masculine shirt with a stiff collar, cool cuffs and a fashionable vest”. I asked her what fashion advice she had for the soon-to-be-wed butch. “If they wanted to wear white, I would suggest a white tux shirt or military collar with a white vest and a bow tie the colour 92 OCTOBER 2017
of their bride’s accessories. And a pair of white slacks, colourful socks and a sharp pair of shoes. For a different butch, I might suggest a militaryinspired blazer, a masculine brooch, pocket square, fitted slacks and a pair of wing tips. Simple, clean, elegant and masculine.” Benjamin Butch is a London-based drag king, who also happens to be engaged. They shared their dream wedding look with me. “As a self-identifying gender fluid person, I describe my fashion as femme butch. I enjoy wearing flamboyant shirts and/or blazers and jackets, but always with tight skinny jeans or trousers. I do feel that most wedding blazers or waistcoats for women are either boxy in shape or tailored to accentuate parts of my body I don’t want them to. I would like to wear a flamboyant but classy suit to get married in. It will probably involve sequins! Then I’ll wear a different vibrant shirt with rolled up sleeves and braces for the after-party.” Some gender fluid people find a binder works for them in helping to flatten their chests under their clothes. There are lots of places to find binders — gc2b (gc2b.co) make a really great binder in a variety of colours and styles, and they are very helpful and attentive to their customers. A quick search should heed lots of top binder lists and in depth reviews if this is something you are thinking about for your wedding day. It took me until my mid 20s to feel comfortable dressing as a non-binary butch. When I shop on the high street I plump for the men’s section. Uniqlo make a great shirt, but the fabric still pulls uncomfortably at the hips and chest. The posh black suit I own is from a second-hand shop and it makes me feel sexy and masc. But I think I would want something a bit more on
GETTING HITCHED? DO IT IN STYLE, SAYS DORA MORTIMER
the je ne sais quoi side to get hitched in. Maybe a bold colour? Like blue or pink! With a nicely camp buttonhole arrangement to match. You can have lots of fun with the florist picking out different colours; they can even help you choose something suited to your tough, tender personality! I like the queer lineage carnations come with. When you’re the Ellen it can seem like there’s no obvious wedding options available for you on the high street that extend beyond ill-fitting men’s suits. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t out there. You’ve already found your Portia, but that white, floaty three piece suit is just around the corner. HauteButch “endeavours to accentuate and empower the entire spectrum of butches, studs and tomboy style-seekers in their myriad of identities, expressions and presentations” and it’s one of many brands that are putting butch tailoring front and centre. There isn’t one type of butch, in fact there are as many different genders as there are people. You know what’s right for you so play around, have fun looking, try stuff on and dress up for your partner. And when you’ve got your outfit sorted, send us a snap so we can all coo over how handsome you look!
, Doras tips for the
Butch Betrothed
Instagram and Pinterest have lots of wedding fodder to pore over | eBay | Second-hand shops | Search the men’s/boy’s departments on the high street | The Butch Clothing Company thebutchclothingcompany.co.uk | DapperQ dapperq.com | Bindle & Keep bindleandkeep.com | HauteButch hautebutch.com | Sharpe Suiting sharpesuiting.com | gc2b gc2b.co
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| LIFESTYLE | STARS |
ARIES (21 MARCH-20 APRIL) It may be colder outside baby, but your love life is hawt sauce. Not only is there a full moon in your sign, but fiery Mars is snuggling up to saucy Venus. Hunt your dream girl down at the gym, yoga or anywhere sweaty. Lust, sex, romance and roller coaster dating in the first two weeks of the month make the end of October all about balance. A surge of energy on the 15th brings a surprising adventure. TAURUS (21 APRIL-21 MAY) This month could not be better for all things love. Venus and Mars take you to the pleasure dome. The girls find you funny as hell, and charming. A mega cosmic happening on the 8th brings you a peak experience. Jupiter, the lucky planet, is also entering your relationship zone. Make the most of it, as after the 14th you’re more interested in working out than staying in. GEMINI (22 MAY-21 JUNE) October brings a tornado of potential as Mercury makes you a creative genius. In the first half of this month, you feel like nesting and sorting irritating home and family issues. It’s all change on the 14th when Venus meets Mercury and the sun is in your erotic, playful and happiness zone, making you every bit the babe magnet. The new moon on 19th brings a passionate surprise allowing you to finally make a decision. CANCER (22 JUNE-23 JULY) October’s full moon powers you to grasp that job you’ve been after or plunges you into an exciting project. Look out for a Capricorn gal who’s impressed with your rad skills. Feeling tongue-tied and nervous to ask that
OCTOBER
MICHELE KNIGHT READS THE QUEER STARS FOR YOU
Michele Knight is a queer psychic, astrologer, broadcaster, TV personality and best-selling author. She lives in a castle with her Gemini gal, parrot, pigs, dogs and donkeys. micheleknight.com
hottie out for a date? Mercury sorts you out from the 17th, and lucky Jupiter is spending the next year in your soul mate and pleasure zone from the 10th. LEO (24 JULY-23 AUG) Venus is getting you all serious about love and you’re determined to take things to the next level. All things cosy appeal to you now as you long for evenings snuggled up bingeing on OITNB. On the 15th you might catch the eye of a wild one, and find yourself torn between the familiar and the adventurous, but no one said you couldn’t have both! VIRGO (24 AUG-23 SEPT) The full moon on the 5th brings a secret erotic opportunity. Should you or shouldn’t you? Venus and Mars are in your sign making you irresistible to the gals and much more forceful than usual. Ooh er, it’s all so intense but also sexy as hell! After the 14th, Venus and the new moon turn your thoughts towards committing. LIBRA (24 SEPT-23 OCT) You’re in your element this month as Venus slips into your sign. Yes, you’re catnip to the ladies! You practically purr when you talk, and your sweet, sweet words are like spells. Taken? You bring the romance and butterflies back. Ok, there could be a bit of argybargy on the home front. Is someone accusing you of not pulling your weight? Just charm them and step up. SCORPIO (24 OCT-22 NOV) Jupiter is in your sign from the 10th promising a year of luck. Make the most of it, it only happens every 12 years. What does your sizzling heart desire? Jupiter rewards shaking things up – go for it. It’s time to change those pesky bad habits. From the 17th Mercury enters your sign making you quite the charmer. You are VERY
persuasive and definitely a cunning linguist, use those skills wisely… SAGITTARIUS (23 NOV-22 DEC) October allows you to go full party monster. Make sure you don’t double book. Jupiter is changing signs and turning you into a bit of a lush – saying no has never been harder. Jupiter transforms you into Willow from Buffy, you’re quite the seasonal witch you know! Trust your instincts, if you think she’s a wrong’un then she probably is. CAPRICORN (23 DEC-20 JAN) Venus in your adventure zone makes anything possible. You ooze sensuality, but are you flirting with someone offlimits? With saucy Mars and seductive Venus delivering a raunchy night around the 8th, your desire gathers. But where or with who are you going to channel it? As long as you do the work, the new moon on the 19th brings a job upgrade. Oh, and on the 14th when Venus shifts, a work attraction could get more intimate. AQUARIUS (21 JAN-19 FEB) Venus and Mars are dragging up hidden desires this month. Secrets, vanishing Snapchats and teasing confuse you. Perhaps it’s time to have a face-to-face and ask what’s going on? After the 14th you should feel more confident about your seduction skills. Taken? Let go of any grudges and start again. PISCES (20 FEB-20 MARCH) Even if you hide it, you probably have romance etched on your DNA. A part of you always dreams of a happy ending and Venus and Mars are dangling a fairytale. Is it real though? Your intuition has the answer, but are you listening? After the 14th you probably won’t care so much about the outcome as you happily play with her boundaries. 95
| DIRECTORY | a-z bespoke tailoring
a-z jewellery
The Butch Clothing Company Bespoke Clothing
www.thebutchclothingcompany.co.uk info@thebutchclothingcompany.co.uk Mob: 07851 227669 Tel: 01892 836936
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Bespoke Tailoring With A Twist
96 OCTOBER 2017
Kerry is in the vanguard of a new generation of young, dynamic, creative tailors. Nothing beats the thrill of wearing a perfectly ďŹ tted suit that's been made for you. Kerry's approach to the way she works is as fresh as her styling and the difference is clear the moment you step into her studio.
www.goodrichbespoke.co.uk
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| LAST WORD | CROSSWORD |
17 ACROSS
ACROSS 1
Comedian and “little misfit” who met her wife in Lesvos, Zoe ____
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Fifth Harmony’s new album
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Weight measurement
8 Much decorated lobe 10 Backdrop for a play 11 Dish sometimes served with wasabi
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13 Richard Bach novel
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14 Hunger for
2 Busy, busy, busy, three words
16 Sexy or spicy
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17 Rapper on The X Factor who recently came out as gay
4 Oohs and aahs (over)
6 Twilight Saga star, currently dating model Stella Maxwell, goes with 28 across
21 Unit of laundry 23 1996 Wachowski film portraying a lesbian relationship
32 Shaft of sun
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23 Big blowout party 24 Exhaust, as a supply, two words 25 A kind of queen 27 Morale-boosting meeting 29 Shirt label
12 Heartsick feeling
TEST YOUR LGBT KNOWLEDGE WITH OUR QUEER CROSSWORD
15 Fish tank organism, plural 17 Game Of Thrones channel 18 Prefix with interference 19 Shy and alluring 20 Wedding promise, two words
CROSSWORD MYLES MELLOR
31 Singer-songwriter who is performing at the DIVA Literary Festival in Birmingham, surname
22 Somebody on your side
9 Morning time
26 She plays Piper Chapman, ____ Schilling
30 Palace dweller
Stomach muscles, briefly
5 Star in The L word and All Over Me, first name
20 Fashionable
28 See six down
Greek island, home to Sappho
21 First name of Fifth Harmony singer who is bi
TRINITY WALK, ROYAL BOROUGH OF GREENWICH SE18
PHASE ONE RELEASED
Two & three bedroom Shared Ownership apartments for sale in Woolwich Arsenal, SE18 2 bedroom apartments: Minimum share 25 % = £97,500 (Full Market Value from £390,000) 3 bedroom apartments: Minimum share 25% = £107,500 (Full Market Value from £430,000)
The release of Phase One of these stunning homes forms part of a three phase development within Woolwich Arsenal in the Royal Borough of Greenwich. These apartments are just a short stroll from Woolwich Town Centre, offering high street retail outlets and a vibrant street market. Trinity Walk also benefits from excellent transport links. The national rail service runs into central London with direct services to London Bridge, Charing Cross and Cannon Street. The DLR service runs to Bank and Stratford. South and South-East can be linked to the town centre via bus routes. We look forward to the Cross Rail in 2018.
sales@pahousing.co.uk
www.sales.pahousing.co.uk
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