Hot Topic Don’t hate, communicate Spotlight father-son legacy Written in the Stars monica chowdhury
Dhaka Tribune
Tuesday, July 30, 2013 Volume 1, Issue 15
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CHECK IT OUT
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A weekly production of
DhakaTribune Editor Zafar Sobhan Magazine Editor Sabrina Fatma Ahmad
8 Written in the Stars Giving the youth a voice
TMAG Team Sabiha Mahmud Sumi Rubab Nayeem Khan Munira Fidai Afshan Sattar Natasha Rahman Azfar Rahman Saudia Afrin Tahsin Momin Sama E Deen Rifat Binte Haider Contributors Fardeen Ameen Shehtaz Huq Graphics Mohammed Mahbub Alam Sabiha Mahmud Sumi Kazi Istela Imam
10 Spotlight Father-son legacy
Production Masum Billah
5 Look of the Week
Advertising Shahidan Khurshed
Stunning in sapphire
Circulation Wahid Murad
Editor’s note
Email: tmag@dhakatribune.com, Website: www.dhakatribune.com
Dear Readers,
About the cover Hot Topic Don’t hate, communicate
Dhaka Tribune Tuesday, July 30, 2013 Volume 1, Issue 15
Spotlight father-son legacy Written in the Stars monica chowdhury
The great generation divide Models Manam Ahmed Zerif Ahmed Photographer Quamrul Abedin
One of the worst things about adolescence is the fighting. Half the time your parents tell you you’re too young for something, and the rest of the time they tell you to grow up, and it feels like they never listen. This week, we explore the ways in which parents and teens communicate, with varying degrees of success, and tips and tricks on how to deal. From real-life stories and stats on the generation gap on Hot Topic (Page 6-7), to heart-warming tales of father-son musical duos on Stereo (Page 10), we’ve got both the ups and the downs. And do check out our You Write it (Page 9) for a wonderful writing/performance opportunity. As always, do let us know how we’re doing and what else you’d like to see in our pages. Send your doodles, chic pics, confessions and queries to tmag@dhakatribune.com We’ve also got our own Tumblr page now. For sneak previews of our upcoming issues, and a few behind-the-scenes snapshots of the team that brings you your weekly dose of awesome, check out http:// tmagtribune.tumblr.com Love, From the TMAG desk
More inside Gossip 12 Dear Diary 12 Blush Much picks OF THE WEEK 2 Room Raiha Ahsan 3 Doodle Simontika Chawdhury YOUR WORLD 9 Fiction The Rest is Still Unbidden 9 Comic book Heavy Liquid 9 Book The Casual Vacancy 5 Car Lexus LFA 11 Gadget Hunt Onboard with PG 11 Web Critic Sikh Chick Talkies
HOROSCOPES 5 Your forecast FASHION 4 Beauty Check Quick fix skin mantra 4 Wardrobe Check It’s good to keep your clothes on
TMAG SAYS 2 Funk up Your Room Knock knock 2 FYI Negotiating curfews 3 School Survival Catching the reading bug Real Life 3 Event tweets Airtel buzz 6 Hot topic Bridging the gap 9 Non-fiction Quit labelling 12 Kids say, parents say
Status of the week You can only be young once. But you can always be immature.
Quote of the week If you and a friend were fighting over a cookie, your friend would give it to you… but a best friend would take the whole thing and say… ha! Too slow loser!
Lingo of the week Shemurr- A vocalisation of the grimace you make when you get into a really awkward situation. Made popular by the Youtube sensation IISuperwomanII Example: “I bunked a class this morning, telling the teacher I was sick. She caught me in the cafeteria right after. Shemurr”
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Your Life
FYI
Funk up your room
Negotiating Curfews One of the most contentious topics for a teen and his/her parents is the issue of curfews. With security being a huge issue, parents tend to get anxious when their kids are out, and the teens feel cooped up when curfews are imposed. TMAG gives you a few pointers on how to curb down restrictions from parents, without having to throw a tantrum at each other.
Knock knock! Bedroom doors don’t just hold meaning for the entrance of a room. They can be a gateway through which the owners can show off their individuality, desires and creativity. What mostly happens is that door decorations remain ignored and unnoticed in comparison to other parts of room. However, with simple additions and inner creativity you can create a doorway which will expose the real you. Below are some tips which will help you create a door that speaks your language Hobbified
Showcase your interests through your bedroom door. Sounds weird? It’s actually not. Sports, music, movies, photography, painting- whatever floats your boat, have it on your door. You could also put up favourite celebrity posters/ symbols or anything that means something to you in order to create a shrine of your own. If you are the artsy type you could decorate your door with your favourite poems, quotes and paintings. Hanging can also be a good option. Blank or decorative frames will do wonders to your door.
Post it bigstock
All ears
When your mom or dad say’s “You have to be home by 8!” try not to show your temper because, that will give rise to a bunch of curfews! If you stay calm, they’ll be convinced that you have become a full-fledged adult.
In this mad world, it’s difficult to keep in touch with family members. No worries! Your door can be your mouthpiece and mediator. How? Adorn it with a beautiful calendar and pencil in your schedule. For getting important notes from family
Their perspective
Your friends
Afsara Tasnim
Introduce your friend circle to your family. Call them over more often to your place; encourage them to engage in conversations with your parents. That way, both sides will be familiarised with each other, and if they click well, they won’t have to worry about a thing.
Your defence
Explain to them that staying out a little late for an hour or two with friends won’t hamper your curfew. If you want them to give you a slightly flexible curfew, suggest a particular timing and follow that religiously. The moment they see you are returning home as per the timing they agreed upon, they will gradually become more lenient towards you. Rubab Nayeem Khan
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Holiday flair
To honour holidays, a bedroom door is a good arena. Why don’t you make something very special for this Eid-ulfitr? Make tons of stars and moons in vibrant colours and make them shine with glittery pens. Glue the stars and moon at random with hanging EID wishes for every family member and friends so it looks like messages on the sky! Make your folks smile at your effort and love you just a little more! Saudia Afrin bigstock
TMAG’s Room of the week!
They are your parents, and yes they don’t get your drift and they don’t even want to, particularly because they are very protective of you. If you mock their concerns it’ll only aggravate them more, and you’ll be cursed with more restrictions.
member attach a pad of papers. To make it catchier, adhere with decorative papers and pictures on the door. Instant door decor! Create decorative name display for your door. For this you could buy dice-cut cardboard letters which is the easiest way but you can cut tag out of scrapbook paper as well.
Name
Area
BAILEY ROAD Nothing says a happy, fun-filled childhood than oodles of toys. Even when you outgrow them, a pile of plushies make a nice fuzzy detail for the bed or dresser
Send in a picture of your room to tmag@dhakatribune.com and you may be crowned TMAG’s room of the week!
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Schoologistics
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School Survival
Catch that Reading Bug! If anything in this world has mixed reviews, reading is it! For avid readers, it’s the coolest pastime ever. For non-readers, it’s just as easy to label their reader friends as nerdy. However, reading and being well-versed has a number of advantages like stress reduction, vocab expansion, memory improvement and greater analytical skills, improved concentration and writing skills and the best bargain of all- free entertainment. For those who like the idea of reading but cannot seem to quite catch that bug, here are some tips Time it
The best way to get used to reading is to fix a time of the day when you take out some moments to read. Make it a time when you are generally at home and are not rushing to do other chores. Evening times are best or right before sleeping. Once your brain associates the timing to the activity of reading, you will gradually start to long for a book as your time of reading comes nearer.
Choose smart
The best way to create an interest in reading is to choose books on topics that engage you. Ask your reader friends for names of writers who have page turning or suspense building abilities. It’s best to start with these authors as they help to get appropriately hooked.
Keep it handy
It’s always a good idea to keep a book that you’re enjoying, handy. Keep it in your bag and carry it around with you. The best way to find out you’re catching the bug is when you get reading pangs during free times and think about the characters in the stories. Don’t deprive yourself in those moments. Pull out that book and let the stories continue!
Ditch if need be
Not every book is for every reader. Don’t let the wrong author or a boring book put you off reading forever. Remember, you can work up a healthy reading appetite by starting to read blogs and e-magazines too! So if a big, fat book with fine print intimidates you, you know where to start! munira fidai Bigstock
EVENT
Buzzing through Facebook
Communicating with friends is not the only entertainment social networking sites provide. One can also get to know the thoughts and ideas of other people through popular social networking pages such as Airtel buzz that have thousands of followers, and share views. Airtel Bangladesh is only making things easier for ones who love to stay connected to each other on the most popular social networking sites- Facebook. For Zara, a business student and an ardent enthusiastic in corporate brands, the social networking page that tops her favorite list is Airtel buzz. Nowadays, many youngsters participate in Airtel buzz. As a youth centric brand, Airtel fast recognized the youth’s need to stay connected with each other. Airtel considers its Facebook page followers as bees and refers them as buzzers who would create buzz, and the more fan base it has, the bigger the “hive.” The
company has worked diligently to occupy a space in the social media. One example of a successful ad campaign of Airtel Bangladesh is “Bondhu Chara Life Impossible”. The video of this advertisement has been shared more than 11,000 times and has more than 50,000 likes in Airtel buzz. At present, Airtel Bangladesh Ltd. is the most talked about brand on Bangladeshi cyberspace, and Facebook is a convenient medium in communicating details of a service that Airtel offers; customers can even post their queries on ‘airtel buzz’ to gain a better understanding of the product and its services, and participate in online competitions. The rapid development of cyber space promises to have a profound impact on our lives. Successful brands like Airtel Bangladesh have already devised innovative ways to keep people interested in their Facebook page by providing a platform for hundreds and thousands to speak up, and not solely about their products and services. munira fidai
TMAG’s Doodle of the week!
Simontika Chowdhury drew this during History class If you are a classroom doodler, email your doodle to tmag@dhakatribune.com and see it in our weekly!
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FASHION FACE-OFF Beauty Check
Look of the Week
Quick Fix Skin Mantra
Sizzle in Sapphire
Pick out any article on skincare and you’ll be mobbed with a gazillion ways to torture your skin with elaborate massages and facials. Here we have for you a few quick fixes on how you can have gorgeous movie star skin without making a hole in your pocket on products that do you more harm than good.
Make a statement in a bold, bright blue. Sometimes, a stunning colour is all you need to turn heads
Gulp down the fluids Ladies, always end up stacking up on products that make false promises to make your skin look grand but they tend to forget the easiest way to have strikingly good looking skin. Drinking 6 glasses of water daily will not only make your skin glow but in this terrible weather fluids are what will keep you from looking like a wilted flower. If you don’t have faith in our words, try it and have your friends curse you secretly for mastering that natural angelic glow.
Model Benzir Ishrat House ERROR Photography Homayra Adiba
Wardrobe Check
It’s good to Keep Your Clothes On!
Every generation has made fashion boo-boos that have made future generations look back and say, “What on earth were they thinking?” But while fashion disasters are one thing, there are some fashion decisions we see on a regular basis that are so obscene, they border on insolence! Take a look at some of them- laugh but also keep in mind that these are to be avoided at all costs
Jeans: Too damn low for good Low rider jeans are fine but not when they provide a clear glimpse of the very thing pants attempt to hide. While people wearing jeans in such a way are eerily comfortable in that style, the rest of the people around are usually holding their breath for the moment the jeans all but slip off! Suspenders, anyone?
Skirt too short, leggings too sheer Dhaka is slowly, very slowly becoming open to miniskirts in certain parts of town. However, while most of the street Romeos are used to seeing our foreigner friends in short clothes, they stand gaping in open mouthed wonder at the same clothes on their own nationality. No, sheer leggings are not the answer. There is a reason why they are called sheer. If you must wear shorter clothes, make sure you have the proper vehicle to travel in (visualize trying to get on a
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rickshaw in a miniskirt and you’ll know what we mean) and the right place with the right crowd.
I can ALMOST breathe There are some people who feel this way when they wear their ultra-tight clothes under the misconception that in makes them look skinny. For people who have fat or skin to spare, newsflash: it makes it worse! It highlights each part of your body and makes you look indecent, even when fully covered. Midriff tops with love handles are a huge no-no!
So low, you could call ‘em neck-less Showing off assets may not be a very polite way to spend a family dinner, however “in” it may be. Worse, when you try to pass it off as a mistake and the rest of the evening pulling up what shouldn’t be so low in the first place. Looking sexy is about attitude, not exposed parts of you that people rather not see! Munira fidai
bigstock
Sleep tight Want to wake up with rejuvenated skin? Give yourself a good 7 hours of uninterrupted slumber and have your skin thank you later. With the bustling all you students lead, sleep is a luxury that you end up succumbing to on weekends. Tuck yourself in early for a few nights and wake up to skin you can’t take your eyes off.
Strip out your natural skin Exfoliating is key to perfect skin .You can moisturize and empty your sunscreen bottle on your skin all you want, but without fighting off the dead cells on your skin, the result will be dismal. Pick out an exfoliating cream with smooth round granules which are kind to your skin and get the job done. Splash water on your face and feel your skin smiling smugly at the world! Natasha Rahman
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Street
HOROSCOPE Aries (Mar 21-Apr 19) Misunderstandings will come flying your way this week; instead of dodging them, clear them out with whoever is kept in the dark. It doesn’t matter who makes the first move, as long as both of you are on good terms it’s all fine and dandy. Frivolous expenditures won’t serve you well. Taurus (Apr 20-May 20) If you can’t organize your thoughts this week, hence it would be better if you stall making drastic changes to your life. Don’t get influenced by the impulses of others; do what you have to whenever you are ready. Pushing your limits is not a great idea for now. Gemini (May 21-Jun20) Getting out of your comfort zone will work wonders for you this week; it all starts with doing something you have never done before. You are a hard worker, but may not be an extraordinary one yet; really high expectations are no good if your performance is avarage.
Cancer (Jun 21-Jul 22) Being cynical about others won’t help you get any better; if you can’t play nice, don’t play at all. You’ll be coming off as annoying to those around you; tone down your sense of humour. You can’t expect people to take a gulp of your anecdotes all at once. Sensitivity can be achieved if you spend some quality time with someone new.
Libra (Sep 23- Oct 22) You get a bit nostalgic when thinking about your past, and as long as you don’t sink into depression, it’s all good. An idea that you implement will come off as a good investment for those around you. If responsibilities spin out of control, ask for help. Scorpio (Oct 23-Nov 21)
Leo (Jul 23-Aug 22) Relationships will come off as confusing to you at the start of this week. If you are in a rough patch with siblings or friends, now is the time to swallow your ego and say “sorry” or accept their apology if they were at fault. Virgo (Aug 23- Sep 22) Controlling your temper isn’t easy, but isn’t hard either if you know what’s at stake. Calm yourself if you are agitated about something; if you can’t deal with them in the presence of company, separate yourself from the crowd.
Showing someone helpless a little compassion will be a generous way to start the week. Try bonding with children, even if you don’t like them. Sometimes minions on a sugar rush cheer you up, even when you least expect it. Matters of the heart should be dealt with the mind, for a change. Sagittarius (Nov 22-Dec 21)
There’s nothing wrong with fulfilling your desires, as long as you remember to keep tabs on your actions. You can engage in something unconventional even when people don’t believe in you; set an example and prove them wrong.
Capricorn (Dec 22-Jan 19)
Something will be pestering you at the beginning of the week, and you won’t be able to figure out what it really is. Given your character, you’ll probably get to the bottom of it and send it back to where it came from, so don’t sweat it! Someone is eyeing you; try to spot the hints. Aquarius (Jan 20-Feb 18)
Handling multiple problems isn’t your cup of tea. Concentrating on existing tasks will bode well in the long run; especially if you are up against someone competitive. Diminish financial crisis by looking for a job. Pisces (Feb 19-Mar20)
Instead of solving your problems all by yourself, you could ask a friend to lend an ear. You don’t need to give others an accountability of what drives you; you are entitled to happiness even if the methods are odd. Just remember to keep track of your actions.
Car Talk
Up & Beyond Over the years Lexus has gained many awards in the executive class. This means they are beautifully made and impeccably engineered to achieve an unmatchable level of dullness. So, when they announced to make a super car, it became clear to the audience what it would be like. Right up till the moment they unveiled it. Yup, egg on the face, foot in the mud, apple pie for breakfast, lunch and dinner. It’s called the Lexus LFA. Despite being a Lexus, it does not have many of the Lexus-y features. There is no hybrid hidden underneath the bonnet or a golf cart hidden in the boot. It even has a spoiler. It is definitely the real deal. And if you are still not convinced that this is a super car, then chewing up on some real numbers might help. 552 BHP: same as a Gallardo. 0-62 mph in 3.7 seconds: same as a Ferrari 599. A top speed of 202mph: that is faster than an Aston Martin DBS. Now this being a Lexus, one might expect it to not just to be a supercar but a supercar full of immense attention to details. You would be right; the 4.8 Litre V10, but yet Lexus has somehow managed it to fit into a space of an oversized V6. But that is not the amazing thing about this car. The amazing thing is the way it revs. The engineers at Toyota had to fit a digital rev counter instead of
an analogue one, because it just couldn’t keep up with the rate it revs up and down. Even the paddle shifters are super responsive. That is some amazing stuff from a company which never built a super car before. Which is why they took their sweet time over this one. 9 years in fact. It was initially developed in 2001 and was meant to have an aluminium chassis but the Toyota R&D decided to scrap the whole aluminium chassis and opted for carbon fibre-reinforced plastic instead. The designers were obsessed with lightness, and the geekiness shows
up on the design. Then there is the most important question – does it feel like a sports car? Well it is most certainly lively and the brakes are brutal. While turning into a corner, the front end is a bit soft and the rear end covers it up nicely with a brute force and swallows up the corners in a gulp. Get it wrong and it shows no sign of mercy. Get it right though, it will leave you with laughter. So, there we are, what a turn up from the librarian of the car world! This brings us to the obvious question. Would you want one? All comes down to the price.
At a price tag of $465,000, it is $108,000 more than a Ferrari 599. Even at that price Lexus still can’t make a profit out of it; in fact for every car they sell, they lose money. So while this is an engineer’s wet dream, being a brilliant creation, price wise it’s on a different planet. Tahsin Momin
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HOT TOPIC
Dont hate
Communicate
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“They say I’ve got to learn, but nobody’s here to teach me If they can’t understand it, how can they reach me?”
While the song is ostensibly about gangsters and a life of crime, these lines might well reflect on the generation gap between parents and teens. After spending the first decade or so of your life secure in the roles you play as a child, suddenly you’re faced with confusing mixed signals. You’re either told to “grow up” and do things differently, or admonished about being “too young” for other stuff. Then there’s the media, and peer pressure telling you the exact opposite of what your parents are. You’d think that your folks, having passed this age would understand, but no, sometimes they are the problem. This week, TMAG talks about the gulf of miscommunication that separates parents and teens
Case study Fifteen year old Pavel Mahmood is his parents’ only son, and as such, never wanted for any material comfort since childhood. In spite of all this, he wasn’t close to his family; not even with his only sister. Pavel has no recollection of any beautiful moment spent with her. What he does remember is daddy always away at work and mummy busy in the kitchen or running around with household chores. While this may seem like almost everyone’s story in busy Dhaka, what happened to Mahmood three years ago is not. He’d already been bunking
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classes for a while, and his parents always complied without questions, when he asked them for money. They didn’t pay attention to his progress at school, never imagining what was waiting for them. The police found Mahmood, dressed in his school uniform, smoking outside on the streets at a time when he was supposed to have been in the classroom. He was taken into police custody for truancy, and it was several hours before his parents could retrieve him. One has to wonder, would it really have hurt the parents to talk to their precious son once in a while? By Saudia Afrin
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Saudia Afrin
“My parents should be proud that I’m addicted to texting, eating, video games, the Internet and not drugs.” ~ adiba afreen
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~ Coolio, “Gangster’s Paradise”
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HOT TOPIC
Survey
Communication is key Before we learn to bridge the gap between parents and children, we should look at the things we aren’t supposed to do in the first place. For instance when either party is upset and not comfortable with sharing it, please do not pursue the matter. Respect each other’s feelings by saying nothing at all. Sometimes silence is the best treatment for such situations. Both parties should keep in mind that both confrontation and arguments are toxic to the situation and will never help solving the problem, leading, instead to escalation. It is very important for them to be understanding and be sympathetic towards each other’s needs and expectations. Instead of having expectations, accept the reality by telling yourself that “it’s okay to be upset at times. It’s a phase in life where parents and children don’t get along with each other at times.” It very important to maintain a positive attitude at all times, because being positive will guide you through the worst of situations and help put back things in the right place. Furthermore, be patient and DO NOT jump to a conclusion immediately. It is always wise to see the other side of the coin. Sometimes children need to put themselves in their parents’ shoes and see it from their perspective and vice versa. rules to live by • Parents must believe in themselves. They can only try their best to do the right parenting (and not the ‘best’ parenting). There is no such thing as ‘bad’ parenting. After all we are humans and we do make mistakes. Parenting is a lifelong learning process that all parents learn through trial and error. • Children must remember that there will always be a generation gap between them and their parents. And there’s nothing wrong with it or something to be worried about. So, take it easy and be patient. DON’T get upset or surprised if parents don’t seem to be understand you at times. Dr. Afroza Akhter, Chief Executive and Principal Psychologist at NIRNOY, a centre for counselling, training and research
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TMAG interviewed 50 people, aged 15-30, about their communication patterns with their parents.
When asked about their age difference with parents 32% stated 18-25 years 44% said 26-30 years 22% said 31-35 years 2% said “Other”
FAQ’s I am doing my O’ levels and I need more allowance from my dad. He gives me a weekly allowance of Tk500 and expects me to get by with it. My coaching centre is in Dhanmondi, and I usually eat outside. But my dad thinks more money will only spoil me and he won’t even allow me to teach students to earn some extra cash. How do I convince my dad that to increase my pocket money? By recognising his stubbornness for what it really is - a chance for you to prove you’re responsible. Tk2000 per month is a tight budget, but not an impossible one (check out our back issues for money management tips). Show your dad that you can stick to the number, and he’ll loosen up on the no-tuition case, and by then you’ll have a new skill, and he’ll have new respect for you. My parents are forcing me to wear hijab because they want me to be more religious. But I am not ready yet to take that path. We constantly fight about it and my dad has threatened to take me out of university unless I listen to them. Please help. Ouch. This one’s a toughie, as issues of faith are often sensitive and nonnegotiable. The only consolation we can offer is that once you’re old enough to be independent, you can write your own rules. Till then, unfortunately, you’ll have to stick it out and comply with their wishes. My mother doesn’t like the girls I hang out with because they wear western clothes. Every time I tell her I am going out with them she snaps at me and makes a huge fuss. She disapproves of my mixing with them. How do I get her to be more open minded about my female friends? A lot of what we fear comes from uncertainty. Minimise this by introducing your mother to your female friends, and if possible, their mothers. Once she gets to know them, she’ll be less prone to
attributing questionable behaviour to them based on superficial observation. When you’re heading out with them, stick to a dress code she approves of, so she won’t fear you getting ‘corrupted’.
When asked if they have any sibling 86% stated they have other siblings 14% said they are the only child.
I am a 17 year old girl, and I really want to be an artist. However, both my parents have set their minds on me being a doctor. I have no interest in medical science and they just won’t understand that. They are now forcing me to go to med school. I have tried everything; from shouting, persuading, emotionally blackmailing. Nothing works. Advise please. Parents want a secure future for their children, and with the job market the way it is, their fears are justified. You’ll need back-up on this. Talk to your teachers, and maybe another adult relative. Get them to talk to your parents on your behalf, and maybe they’ll see reason. At the same time, you want to do your research and show them that your chosen path is a viable one. And also, get serious about what you’re doing so they know you’re not just frittering your life away. I am a lifestyle journalist and my work involves staying late on most days and that really angers my folks. Despite knowing how passionate I am about my job, they keep telling me to quit my job and look for a job with 9-5 timings. How can I bring them to agree with me? This is not a problem that will go away anytime soon, so if you’re serious about this, get ready for a long war. Keep bombarding them with the results of your hard work. They need tangible proof. It’s good that you’re passionate about your work, but also make sure you have a healthy work/life balance, because ultimately that’s one of their real concerns. It’ll take some time, but they’ll eventually come around.
What do you and your parents fight about? 6% fight about money 6% fight about curfews 4% fight over relationships/ significant others 12% fight over clothes/lifestyle choices 28% fight over education and career 44% stated they have other reasons
Who do you go to with your problems? 26% said that they go to their parents with problems 12% said they went to their siblings 6% said they go their cousins 36% said they go to their friends 20% said they go to others
How do you resolve conflicts with your parents? 16% said they are forced to accept their parents’ decision 2% stated they force their parents 14% said they shout 34% said they hug it out 34% resort to other means
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written in the Stars
Platform for the Youth
Monica Chowdhury
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he’s young, she’s energetic, and she’s up for any challenge. When we got to speak, she was also very bubbly and forthcoming. These are qualities that make a good anchor, and as a moderator for a show like Youth Voice, Monica Chowdhury knows she’s got to bring her whole arsenal of skills with her. “Youth Voice” is a platform for young students in Bangladesh to share their opinions and observations towards any social issue. The big challenge is to find the right setting, frame a context for the issue to be discussed, and then to find the right panellists to engage with the young participants. To Monica, this is an opportunity to feel the pulse of the youth regarding a particular issue. As a graduate of Media and Communication, she relates her learning to real life experiences and intensively researches her topics before going on air. The team of Youth Voice has been to six different universities and colleges so far. Monica has observed that even when the topic under discussion isn’t
necessarily political, the participating students eagerly rope in a political angle. She also finds a noticeable rivalry between Bangla and English medium students through the entire session. She says “It looks like they (Bangla medium students) hold grudges on students who have followed the English curriculum all their lives” Monica’s journey into professional media started during her third year at Independent University, Bangladesh(IUB). She shared her dream to be a news presenter with one of her university teachers, who hooked her up to a start as a news room editor in Boishakhi channel. Gradually, her voice and enthusiasm bagged her the role of news presenter. Monica has had a transitory school life, which prevented her from forming deep friendships. She attributes this to the fact that she started her schooling in Bangladesh then shifted to boarding school in Kurseong, West Bengal. She returned to Dhaka for her O & A levels. But now she is really thankful to God for
having a gang of good friends from her first semester at IUB. An avid movie buff, she credits her friends for her newfound interest in reading. This active media worker is equally active in social development. Very modest and sincere, Monica has started her own online boutique shop to help our heritage holders, the Jamdani makers since 2012. Right now, this successful anchor believes from her heart that she still has a long way to go. Monica is more than happy with what she is doing right now and thanks God for everything. Without her parents, it wouldn’t be possible for her to navigate so far, so easily. She holds a future plan of doing Masters in Mass Communication. Monica Chowdhury “The participants seem to understand their role in the society when asked questions but nobody wants to take sole responsibility, as in everybody agrees that we must do something for the development of the country but no one actually wants to step ahead for action.”
saudia afrin
For those just tuning in, Monica Chowdhury is the face of Youth Voice, a popular forum show on SATV, where students of various universities get to discuss and debate on current affairs and youth-centric issues with expert panellists. This week, Saudia Afrin catches up with Monica
Courtesy
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YOU WRITE IT
book
The Ghost Of Barry Fairbrother Rowling’s first non-Harry Potter-venture deviates rather far from what fans have learnt to expect from her. The Casual Vacancy is a rather adult book, dealing with social issues such as politics, blackmail and the like. The novel is set in a small town in England called Pagford and begins with the death of a councilman, resulting in what is known in politics as a casual vacancy. An electoral race ensues, but all those who stand for the seat find their darkest secrets published on the
Comic Book
council site. The Casual Vacancy is well written, but while the writing style is enough to hold the casual reader’s attention, the content may not be so. Fans of the Harry Potter series would do well to avoid the book simply because of the high expectations people have come to expect from J.K Rowling. I think I would have enjoyed the book more if I hadn’t known who wrote it. Rifat Binte Haider
Non-Fiction
Quit Labelling “Teenagers get a bad rap”-Richard Lerner PhD Director, for Applied Research in Youth Development, Tufts University. So much has been said about ‘terrible teens’ that parents get into their roles by expecting the worst. If a child is involved with music, his/ her parents and relatives assume that they are not good in studies or they might be doing drugs. Adults also cringe when they see opposite sexes socializing; so, if you are seen in a rickshaw with a female friend, look out, you will be stereotyped as being very “fast” and the same goes for girls, if seen with a male friend. Teens are judged based on
Fiction
their wardrobe too; girls in Dhaka city are already eyeballed by passer-by’s every time they stroll outside, but if she’s clad in western wear, her character takes a beating as well. As harmless as it seems, stereotyping or name calling stigmatizes kids and causes them to become more rebellious than they were in the first place. German Cultural Centre will provide those with the best pieces with a platform to perform your piece and share your thoughts and experience. There will be workshops prior to that which will help you prepare for it. Send in your work (in English or Bengali) to German Cultural Centre via email by August 31, 2013. No need for hard copies. Email is your work and a brief description
sculpting liquids
about at program@dhaka.goethe. org and please title your email as “Submission for OPEN SECRET: STEREOTYPES”. Rubab Nayeem Khan
The Rest is Still Unbidden The hardest part is when the thoughts come unbidden, without warning. The reminders lurk in the pages of abandoned books picked up by mistake, in the annals of old emails that have yet to be cleared out. Sometimes the thoughts are stirred up by the strains of some song not played since way back when. They don’t stop me in my tracks, these thoughts, but they do catch me off-guard. I remember, suddenly, the way the light slanted into the verandah the first day you got me roses. The mud on my shoes the day we met accidentally on purpose in the bookstore, and ended up sharing an ice cream sundae. I recall the jolt of adrenaline that beat a staccato rhythm against my ribcage on the nights that we would make clandestine phone calls to each other. We’d talk about the weather, our parents, school, always
coming back to “When will I see you next?” Sometimes that question remained suspended in mid-air, the answer too fraught with uncertainty. Sometimes my own recollections remain suspended in mid-air and I have to pluck my thoughts out of the past that we shared, brief though it may have been. The years have dimmed some memories but not others. I have forgotten your address, the names of your friends, your favorite movie. I remember some of the secrets you confided in me. I forget why it’s so hard to not remember the playlist of our relationship. I remember to remind myself to forget. Shehtaz Huq
Paul Pope who’s famous for his artwork and his connection to work such as “Batman Year 100” brings forward a zany sci-fi story that’s completely different from the dark streets of Gotham. S is the detective hired to find a missing sculptor who can create amazing things from Heavy Liquid, a unique metal with attributes that can be dangerously utilized if in the wrong hands and desired across the world. But only the detective knows that Heavy Liquid can also be used as a miracle drug, an addictive, hallucinogenic experience unlike no other. The search for the sculptor is an action packed adventure across two continents, pursued by deadly gangsters out for revenge in a post-apocalyptic depiction of New York and ending up in Paris, all while encountering more strange characters, girls, pirates and even spider-robots. The story is outdone by the art, and Pope’s work is mesmerizing as he captures the essence of iconic cities like New York & Paris while at the same time allowing you to get lost in the bizarre universe he’s created – the work is fluid and definitely helps the pace of the story, enabling readers to immerse themselves even further. All in all, it’s worth a read because of the unique setting that Pope creates. It’s a fun read and while the conclusion may not appease everybody – the journey’s a trip worth going on. Fardeen Ameen
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10 tmag
stereo
spotlight
Music in their genes “I believe the current generation of musicians doesn’t need any advice from us, the former generation, because, genetically they are far superior to us “old fogies!” I can say with certainty that if they continue to uphold their passion with such integrity and foresightedness, then world will surely be theirs. Their music is destined to be heard and I have absolutely no doubt regarding that.” ~ Maqsoodul Haque For any musician, the greatest achievement one can hope to attain someday would always be leaving behind a legacy for the next generation to come and pick up from. This week TMAG brings you three celebrity musician families By Azfar Rahman & Tahsin Momin
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Rafiqul Alam & Farshid Alam Maqsoodul Haque & Dio Haque Maqsoodul Haque, former lead singer of the famous mainstream band Feedback, is a pioneer in progressive rock and fusion music. Maqsood started his music career in 1976, and after making his mark in history, 23 years later, his son, Dio Haque, drummer for Nemesis, is now one of the most renowned musicians of the current generation.
i7clicks
Dio’s introduction to music came very early. “The earliest memory of music was definitely of Feedback” he says. “My dad had a huge collection of cassettes which included a wide range of genres and artists, and that contributed to my growing interest. Music was always around, in fact, I even went to my first concert when I was 3 years old, and that too on my dad’s shoulder while he was on stage!” The young drummer credits his dad with setting an example for him to follow in his growth as a musician. “Apart from his musical attributes, the most important way he has helped me is by giving me the space to be an independent musician, letting me create an identity of my own rather than one which is defined by whose son I am.” Mac is just as proud of his son as Dio is of his father. “More than hearing his music, I see the struggle he goes through every day, and the very high price he has to pay to believe in his own vision as a musician at times as hard as now.” He goes on to describe Dio’s passion and dedication, calling him a ‘self-made musician.’ “As a musician I am proud of him, but as a ‘father’ - he is just not my son - but a son of Bangladesh. I hope he rises to the call of the nation someday and does everybody proud instead.”
One of the most prominent singers to have emerged from the Bangla movie industry, Rafiqul Alam, is still just as brilliant as he was back in his days. And like father, Farshid Alam has no short comings when it comes to talent. Former bassist of the band Pentagon, Farshid now plays for Bohemian, where he’s also the second/ alternate vocalist. With two studio albums under their belts, along with a number of singles in mixed compilations, Farshid is one of the very popular musicians in the field of modern rock’n’roll. Talking to Rafiqul Alam, it’s obvious he’s proud of his son. “Seeing him on stage performing makes me realise that at that moment, he is not just my son, he has grown up and created a separate personality of his own, one that has helped him make his mark in the industry.” Father and son discuss music both on a personal and professional level, critiquing one another’s performances and learning from one another. Farshid expresses wry amusement at how life turned out for him, revealing that he used to get D’s in music back in school. The musical gene finally showed through, and once it did, both parents were supportive. “Some of my fondest memories are of playing the guitar while he would casually sing throughout random load shedding back in the days” Farshid says, of his father. The duo have performed together many times, a notable memory being this song called “Chotto Pakhi.” “It wasn’t a typical “father and son” experience (what most people would expect), but more like two individual musicians coming together for one song. We made sure of that. Thanks to Bappa Majumder for the wonderful ballad.”
Manam Ahmed & Zerif Ahmed Manam Ahmed, keyboardist and additional vocals for Miles, a band that needs no introduction, is another notable persona from the former and senior music industry. And following their father’s footsteps, Zeheen and Zerif Ahmed, two of the extremely talented guitarists of this generation, have stepped up to the big leagues on their own terms as well. 2012 was the calling year for the brothers as they were asked to join Nemesis. They have certainly lived up to the expectations.
shihab rashid
Zerif Ahmed, 19, is definitely a musical prodigy in terms of his achievements so far. The young musician credits his father and brother for his success. As Zerif puts it, “Growing up as the son of a famous rockstar, my brother and I were always surrounded by musicians. We used to go to rock concerts since we were only kids. It was definitely our dad who inspired us to follow our passion and chase our dreams. He played a huge part then, and he still does even now because there’s always something that I can learn from him that will help me enhance my skills. Even though our music tastes differ by generations, I do however believe that Miles have experienced the best years of rock ’n ’roll, both nationally and internationally. The recognition and acclaim that Miles and its members have earned is definitely an extraordinary feat, and the fact that my dad is a part of this legendary group, is definitely one of the coolest things ever! For me, he is an insane musician and someone I can look up to, alongside my brother being another inspiration. I think the more the three of us keep growing older, the bond between music and family only keeps getting stronger.”
tmag 11
playroom
WE RECOMMEND TV
HILARIOUSLY DYSFUNCTIONAL Modern Family returns for its fourth season and if you haven’t been living under a rock, you are bound to be familiar with the ever hilarious but special Pritchett family. Jay Pritchett the head of the family, and his much younger wife Gloria, have an intelligent son Manny, from Gloria’s past marriage. Descending down the family line, Jay’s own daughter Claire and her husband Phil are proud parents of three Kids Alex, Haley and Luke. To top it all, Mitchell, Jay’s son, is in a relationship with the wonderful Cameron and they have adopted a 3 year old Vietnamese girl Lilly as their daughter. In
Gadget hunt
the last season, we have taken a wild rollercoaster ride with the Pritchett clan, watching the rebellious Haley go to college and the doting fathers Mitch and Cam decide on adopting a baby boy. These three families are unique together for which they give us an honest and hilarious look into the sometimes warm, twisted embrace of their family. If you have followed this series till now, hold your breath for the new season. But if you’re still new to this, move your bodies, you don’t know what you’re missing. Sama E Deen
Onboard with PG Parental Guidance is something that has baffled the minds of teenagers ever since the introduction of the internet. Have you ever thought what it would be like to use internet without PG? Here is a simple trick about how to override PG. If you have internet explorer, then simply look at the bottom right of the browser, there should be a globe symbol. Double-click on the globe symbol, go to restricted sites and simply delete it. And then follow the following seven steps to ensure your free override. Download a key logger software from the internet. n Pick the best rated ones, since they work better than the rest. n Afterwards, install the program. n Run the program, and then attempt to go to a website that is acceptable n
MOVIE
web critic
yet blocked. Ask your parents for an override, where they’ll have to type in the password in order for the site to come up. n After you have gotten the override, wait for them to leave. Then, open the application. n Find the file with the name similar to “text log.” Open the file and you’ll get the password used to unblock the particular website. n Use the password to bypass the parental guidance software, giving yourself free overrides whenever you want. You wouldn’t really want your parents to find out about this, so don’t let this get too popular. And don’t speak of it to your friends. Tahsin Momin
Wrong kind of love From the very first scene to the very last scroll of end credits, Icche is a massive eye opener. Released in 2011, Icche or The Desire is a Bengali film directed by Shiboprosad Mukherjee and Nandita Roy. The film is based on Suchitra Bhattacharya’s novel, which revolves around the relationship between an obsessive mother and her son. Manas, is an insurance agent who lives with his wife Mamata and son Souvik in Calcutta. His wife is dissatisfied by his principles of raising their son. Thus she makes it a point to raise Souvik as a unique child, and not like kids of his age. Mamata would urge Souvik to focus only on his studies and refrain from socialising. But this need for disciplining him soon becomes an
obsession to make Souvik the man she wants him to be. Constantly beating him and crushing his desires, Mamata thought this was the right kind of upbringing. But when Souvik grows up and starts rebelling against his mother’s decisions, Mamata comes to realise that she made a huge mistake by raising him that way. In every scene of the film, Icche delivers an important message to people of all generations by showing how dominance can have negative effects on a child. The depiction of estranged relationships and overcoming parental restrictions is what makes this film a must watch. Sama E Deen
Sikh Chick Talkies In recent years, Youtube has been a launching pad for talent, leveling the playing field for a lot of people who would otherwise have to rely a lot more on chance for a shot at stardom. Sure, it’s given us a lot of crazy, random stuff (here’s looking at you, Epic Mealtime) but it’s also turned up a lot of gems. Superwoman is one of them. Her name is Lilly Singh, and she is a 20-something Punjabi Canadian entertainer who goes by the handle of IISuperwomanII on Youtube. She posts twice a week, and it’s hard to peg her down as any one thing, because it’s quite the variety show on her channel. Some of her vlogs are her own comedic take on mundane things like shopping with parents, the battle of the sexes, and so on. She’s also done inspirational talks, and a couple of music videos, and has recently taken to staging short skits. Everything she does has a strong South Asian flavour, so that’s definitely something that will be funnier for viewers from this region, but she makes it relatable to young people of all kinds of ethnicity because she deals with issues such as self-esteem, family ties, gender roles, and more. The best thing about Singh is that she’s honest and funny without resorting to profanity, and she calls it like it is without setting out to insult anyone. She frequently pokes fun at herself and will play the clown if necessary to get her point across in a way that is at once amusing and insightful. If you want to try something fresh, young, and utterly hilarious, give Lilly Singh a shot. Check out her channel at http://www.youtube.com/user/ IISuperwomanII Sabrina Fatma Ahmad
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12 tmag
TEENARAMA
He says
Parents and kids are at a constant tug of war about anything and everything under the sun. They may be looking at the same thing but their perspectives are so vastly apart that bridging the gap becomes next to impossible. Here we have for you a few scenarios where parents and kids grumble about these never ending problems
She says
Dear Diary,
Every fairytale comes to an end; mine unfortunately came to an abrupt halt. I left a note at home telling my mother I will be off on a field trip from my university and will be back the next morning. She usually is very chilled out about my sudden trips, but today hell broke loose on me. My phone wouldn’t stop buzzing and she kept asking me a hundred questions about this “study trip.” I didn’t want to risk being caught so much to mine and Sameer’s dismay, we decided to head back home. We were having such a wonderful time, rowing boats, exploring the bungalow and swimming together- it was too soon for this trip to come to an end. We packed and quickly made our way home. I was on cloud 9. Sameer was the most romantic charming man I knew and it was only sheer sheer luck that he was mine now. When I reached home I wasn’t expecting to have my parents go behind my back the way they did. I entered the house, all dreamy and in bliss, and I see my mother smiling sheepishly at me. I knew something was up, something I wasn’t expecting or ready to deal with at that moment. She led me to the drawing room and I was face to face with Imran and his parents. I am not sure who was more stunned, them or me. I stood there and my mind began to think of various ways to get back at my folks. How could they put me in such an embarrassing situation? I never considered running away from home, but at that moment, it seemed like it was the only option I had …
The problem of dating without your parents consent Son says
I cannot have a get together at home with any of my female friends, so having a girlfriend is out of the question. My dad would rather disown me than witness me dating someone.
My son listens to every word I say, unlike most rowdy boys out there. I have full faith in him and I know he will not do anything against my wishes.
July 26, 2013
Father says
THE DREAMER
Daughter My mother is a Catholic and she is against says me choosing a guy who is of a different
If you want to share your awesome or not-so-awesome life events email it to us at tmag@dhakatribune.com
religion. I am seeing my boyfriend for the past two years and he is Hindu and I don’t know how I will ever break it to them about him.
The problem of having the freedom to dress according to your wishes Mother says
My daughter loves dressing up and wearing clothes I do not approve of. I do not like her going out of the house wearing a sleeveless shirt and jeans. I myself look down upon girls who dress like this in public places. Hence, it makes me uncomfortable when I think of what her image would be in the society.
I do not share my parents’ perception on right and wrong. I hate it when my mother tells me to wrap a stole when I am wearing a pair of jeans and a top. I don’t know what she is so ashamed of. If I try discussing this with her, it usually turns into an argument.
Son says
Daughter says
My father wants me to keep a long beard and wear loose fitted clothes to my university. He is very stern about his religion and expects me to follow his lead. I have tried telling him that I will eventually follow that path but it needs to come from within and cannot be forced.
Blush Much?
1
On my way to class, I was checking out a Volvo gliding through the streets of Gulshan-2; I didn’t notice that another car was speeding towards my direction. It almost ran over me.
2
I forgot to lock the bathroom door and my classmate barged in on me.
3
I was sitting cross legged, and after I came home at night I realized I was wearing a pair of torn leggings the entire time.
4
I was trying to make a classmate feel uncomfortable by staring at her; she came up to me and spanked my butt in front of the whole class.
5
I wasn’t being able to get out of tight clothes, so I took a scissor, cut through the clothes and ended up grieving because the clothes were really nice and I was too fat for them.
6
I lost balance while slipping into my trousers and ended up fracturing my ankle.
Email your confession today to tmag@dhakatribune.com
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