The VALUE of COMMUNITY

for your children is among the most important gifts you can offer them — and yourself.

Mary and Joseph modeled this. The Bible doesn’t say much about Jesus as a child, but it’s not hard to extrapolate that the Holy Family was solidly supported by community. Why else would Mary and Joseph have not even noticed their 12-year-old wasn’t with the group for three days after they left Jerusalem? The only explanation is, they were so comfortable with the community in which they were raising their son, they figured he was just with someone else and would show up soon.

I’ve been experiencing a surprisingly satisfying part of parenting lately. It’s the bit where I get to watch other people’s kids grow up alongside my own. As the years go by, I find I have almost as much fun watching other people’s kids succeed, grow and change as I do my own. It has its own sweetness, too, because I’m not the one working so hard on those kids. I’m just there for the celebration.

All of our children are going through major milestones this spring. First Communion, Confirmation and graduation from both elementary and high school are on the calendar.

In preparation, I am looking up again and again to see the families we have known for years presenting their children for the same things. Some I know well. Some I only know by sight — not even by name — but these kids and

Karen Ridder their parents are a part of our community. Walking beside them is a fruit of choosing to be in one. We don’t live in a world that is very conducive to community. People move a lot. Friends leave. Your kids grow. You quit a job. The situation changes. Maintaining or creating community can be exhausting. It requires intentionality, sacrifice and sometimes hard work. But, I would propose, creating a community is a parishioner at St. James Parish in Liberty and a convert to the Catholic Faith. She graduated from the University of Missouri School of Journalism and has written for numerous publications in the Kansas City area. Karen and her husband Jeff have three sons and a daughter.

You don’t have that kind of trust in your community by just making a cursory investment in a place. You have to live there. You have to stay there. You have to keep going back time and again, even when it’s hard.

It can be challenging — especially when you are new someplace — but God knows what your family needs, and he will help.

The most satisfying kind of community is with people who share your faith and values. Seek those people out. Invite them over. Ask for and accept help. Tell them your story. Listen to theirs. This is important stuff. Make space for it. Prioritize it.

Don’t be too busy for it.

Jesus never completely left the community his parents built for him. Two of his disciples were kids he grew up with. He went to his cousin John to be baptized. He performed his first miracle at a friend’s wedding. Jesus looked down to see a small community of women and his bestie by Mary’s side at the foot of the cross.

Create a community for your children. It will help them become God’s people. It will help you too by becoming a more satisfied parent — celebrating others — and living like Jesus.