Single! Young Christian Woman Aug 2010 by On My Own Now Ministries

single!

A P U B L I C AT I O N O F O N M Y O W N N O W M I N I S T R I E S

AUG 10

Young Christian Woman

5 morning routine steps to a stress-free

5 breakfasts

grab-and-go

Heel, Fido! Godâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Obedience Training

Tired of Waiting for

The Perfect Guy? w w w. o n m y o w n n o w. c o m

AUG 2010

table of

contents 4.

STRAIGHT TALK FROM THE PROVERBS

Heel, Fido! God’s Obedience Training By Donna Lee Schillinger

Do In the Right Order CENTER RING

Confidence While You Wait By Thomas Mollohan

12.

REBA RAY’S DOWN HOME HEALTHY COOKIN’ FOR ONE ON A BUDGET

Breakfast on the Go By Reba Ray

14.

DEAR GABBY

I’m Tired of Being the Sunscreen Police By The Gabster

16.

SPARE CHANGE

It Pays to Discover… How to Manage Credit Wisely By Julie Ann

18.

young christian woman

MOVING OUT ... SETTLING IN By Kimberly Schluterman

10.

single!

FASHION DIVINA

Stress-free Mornings (breakfast included) By Tamara Jane

A publication of ON MY OWN NOW MINISTRIES

www.onmyownnow.com

EDITOR IN CHIEF Donna Lee Schillinger

www.twitter.com/D_L_Schillinger

WRITERS

Kimberly Schluterman Debra Collins Julie Ann Tamara Jane Thom Mollohan

ART DIRECTION Daniela Bermúdez

the

team

Fridge-worthy.

We see high drama in the movies all the time, but in real life, big acting does not win awards.

Straight talk from the proverbs for young Christian women who want to remain pure, debt-free and regret-free. â&#x20AC;&#x153;In this interesting and thought-provoking exploration of the book of Proverbs, Schillinger takes young women along a journey that will help them to make better, safer, and more sound decisions.â&#x20AC;? Cheryl C. Malandrinos The Book Connection blog Now Available at www.onmyownnow.com, at Amazon, B&N and a library and bookstore near you.

⎟straight talk⎟

heel, fido! God’s Obedience Training Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far from her. Proverbs 22:15

by donna lee schillinger Last summer money was tight around the Schillinger household – we were building a deck and converting our basement into an entertainment room, and therefore, we had no money to take a vacation. So we decided instead to take a long weekend in Tulsa, only a few hours away from our home. But we didn’t even have enough money to do that. We needed to have a garage sale or something. One day, I overheard a conversation about the nation’s longest/largest garage sale “Bargains Galore on 64.” For three days in August, on an approximately 150-mile stretch of Highway 64, there is one huge garage sale. People from all over the south come to Arkansas for this event. In years past, we’d always been on vacation during that week in August and had not personally experienced Bargains Galore. From what I overheard, a person could make a lot of money in those three days. The light went on for me and I really felt as though my proximity to that conversation had been divine appointment and that God was saying to me, “You need

money for vacation, here it is. Just work this three-day garage sale and you can pay for your vacation.” The more I got into planning our participation in this huge sale, the bigger the plans became. I invited my family and friends to give me some of their things to sell, with the understanding that we would peddle their wares and take 10 percent for our efforts. That’s actually quite generous, but it seemed to me the right thing to do. Not only were we going to raise enough money to pay for our vacation, we’d help some others earn some cash too! Additionally, I wanted to sell lemonade and ice cream. Arkansas in August – who wouldn’t want a lemonade or ice cream! Especially when the temperatures were in the hundreds! In theory, a lot of people garage-saling in hundred-degree weather would welcome an ice cream or lemonade. The flaw in my projections was that not a lot of people go garage-saling in hundred-degree weather. Add to that a sudden surge in the price of gas, putting it at record highs for this country and, well, a lot of people who

The light went on for me and I really felt as though my proximity to that conversation had been divine appointment .

⎟straight talk⎟

might have looked for bargains galore on 64 decided they’d rather stay in their comfortable, air-conditioned homes and save the gas money. They decided they could live without someone else’s junk – how prudent of them!

to be an answer to our need for vacation funds!”

I didn’t understand. For a long time, I didn’t get it. It seemed like nothing more than a humiliating miscalculation on my part and finally, something for my husI didn’t see it coming! I had no idea as I band to hold over my head! was heavily investing in supplies to serve The Bible speaks a lot about discipline ice cream and lemonade to hundreds of and I believe we often too narrowly interpeople; I had no idea as we spent days pret that to apply to correction for wrong preparing our junk for sale; I had no idea deeds or training of children. Discipline as my husband decided he would have to doesn’t stop at age 18. In fact, it becomes spend three nights in the bed of our pick- more important. up truck to keep watch over our things at night. Even after the first extremely dis- Physical discipline takes the form of getcouraging day in which I felt nauseous ting up early even when I don’t want to, from the heat, I had no idea that at the eating right when I’d rather eat wrong, end of the three-day torture, we would taking vitamins, the benefits of which I have made just enough profit to order a may not realize for decades, and exercispizza – which was good because our house ing when I would rather be reading or laywas a disaster zone with no food and I had ing in the hammock. no energies left to cook a meal. So we had Spiritual discipline is sometimes harder pizza! We still have Styrofoam cups left to recognize. I know that carving out time over from lemonade sales (or lack there- each day to read God’s handbook on life of) – even after donating a bunch to our and discuss it with Him is an exercise in church. And we still have chopped pecans, discipline. Resisting temptation takes which I now know very few people like to discipline as well. I have to discipline my sprinkle on ice cream. mind not to spend time in anxiety, worry, My bright idea was a blessing for those negative fantasy or even positive fantasy people who had to do nothing more than to the neglect of work. Yet there’s another give us their stuff to sell, like my mom huge aspect of spiritual discipline that is and sister. We sold a fair amount of other not so clear cut: discipline through obedipeople’s things and passed on 90 percent, ence to God.

“I didn’t understand. For a long time, I didn’t get it. It seemed like nothing more than a humiliating miscalculation on my part and finally, something for my husband to hold over my head!” as promised. But besides that little good it did for others, there was no obvious benefit to that exercise in obedience. I was bewildered: “God, I heard you tell me to do this. I asked you several times to make sure I was on the right track. You told me to sell stuff for others. It was supposed

I want to do my Heavenly Father’s will. I try really hard to look for the signs (which He instructs us so often in His word to do) and listen for the urgings of the Holy Spirit. Sometimes I think I hear God telling me to do something that is a little questionable, risky, seems off target

with my goals or like a waste of time. I can hardly believe it’s God telling me to do it, but it doesn’t go away. Things keep coming along to reinforce God’s bidding that I should do this thing. And so I do it and then, as if I were right to be suspicious about it all along, nothing happens. I see no positive result from my followthrough and sometimes the results are a

important to us, as puppy’s master, that she walk right beside us on the path. We know that we don’t want her to dart off and chase a squirrel and get hit by a car. But she will never understand that. She just sees a squirrel that she wants to chase but can’t because she hears, “Heel!” She must think “But why? Every time I see a squirrel, I have to heel. Why? Why!”

Then one day God revealed to me that perhaps

I was just learning to obey.

That was a huge concept.

big negative – like Bargains Galore on 64. I know that obedience for my dogs and Though the memory still burns in my my children is important for reasons mind, I did learn a lot from the experi- they don’t understand. Therefore, I can ence. I learned that you can’t keep ice logically conclude that my own obedicream cold in summer with regular ice; it ence training is also for my good in ways I takes dry ice. I learned that selling stuff don’t understand. second hand is not profitable – a conclu- The whole goal of obedience training is to sion I drew from extensive interviews respond quickly and appropriately in cruwith other vendors as well as a compila- cial moments. Yet it takes a lot of practice tion of other sour experiences with con- responding in noncrucial moments to signment and garage sales. I learned that be ready to respond correctly in a crupeople will simply not even look at heavy cial moment. This is the theory behind wool sweaters when the temperature is military training, martial arts and fire above 90 degrees. Highly useful lessons? drills! And it’s an important part Hardly. of my overall discipline – even To this day, I still am not sure what all that was about. Why did it happen the way it did? Why would God lead me to do something that turned out to be such a flop? I recalled a time or two before, coincidentally in August, when I had what I thought were good ideas that turned out to be real pains. Maybe the point of all of this is that I should not follow through on any unusual ideas that occur to me in the month of August. I just don’t know. Then one day God revealed to me that perhaps I was just learning to obey. That was a huge concept. I imagined myself a puppy in obedience school. If dogs have any such thoughts, I’m sure more than one puppy has asked herself, “What is the point of all this sitting and heeling and going to the bathroom in one particular place?” The puppy doesn’t get it and might never understand why it’s

though I may not know what I’m training for. There may have been some profit from that garage-sale debacle after all – a worthwhile lesson on obedience.

this Hold g t: thou h

ere is I trust th to my a pointience obed ing! train

DO IN THE RIGHT ORDER

B Y K I M B E R LY S C H L U T E R M A N

➊ ➋ ➌ 8

⎟Moving Out ... Settling in⎟ Well, it’s official: I’m married! My gracious editor, Donna Lee Schillinger, gave me a two-month hiatus from this column so that I could prepare for my wedding and enjoy the honeymoon and first weeks of marriage. First, I should say that I love marriage! What a joy it is. Second, I’ll say that that isn’t what I want to talk about. Instead I want to talk about my carpet. I’ve been trying to pick out a carpet for our living room, and curtains for the windows. I tried to do both of those things before we moved into the house, but all I had to go on were pictures because it was still being lived in. In retrospect, what I should have been focused on was preparing for my wedding! I’ve been living in this house for two months, and I realize that I’m just now getting an idea of what I want for both the rug and the curtains. Further, it occurred to me that I should pick the rug first, and then match the curtains to it. Curtains are easier to change than the rug, and they may be changed seasonally; but if I match the rug to the curtains and it doesn’t turn out just right, I’d be in trouble. See? Ecclesiastes 3 tells us that there is a time for everything. In fact, woven throughout scriptures is the idea that we are to do things in a proper order. In this case: Buy the house. Live in the house. Pick a rug. Think about curtains... You get the idea. In life in general, we should do things in the right order. From the time you’re about eight, everyone wants you to decide what you’re going to do with your life. Are you going to be a firefighter? An economist? Musician? Decide, decide now! You need to know what classes to take, which electives and extra-curriculars to participate in. But it occurs to me that that isn’t the right order at all, evidenced by how many kids change their major halfway through college. Why do we put so much pressure on kids to make a decision that won’t be relevant until much later and will probably change a dozen times anyway? And unless you get to go to college for free (scholarships, parents work at the school, etc.), why

push to go to college when you’re 18 if you don’t know yet if that’s really right for you? Wouldn’t it make more sense to focus in our late adolescence on mental health, physical health and becoming a lady who reflects her Father, and decide what we’ll do with our life later? Here are some more examples of how “do in the right order” comes into play. Recently, we had some dinner guests and I made roast beef. I had to clean the house and make dinner. Since the beef would take several hours in the crock pot, I started it around 2:00. Then I cleaned from about 2:15 until about 5:00, at which time I got in the shower and cleaned up. By the time they arrived, the roast was done (and so very yummy) and both my house and I were clean. But what if I had cleaned the house before I started the roast? No dinner. That’s an easy example.

for the future, we need to ensure we have met our financial obligations for today, and are not forsaking tithes and offerings. Do in the right order. It would be “meaningless, meaningless” to retire rich after living 90 percent of our lives with financial stress. Let’s not get carried away with ordering things, though. We don’t need to make a list of everything we do in our day and number it. Whether I microwave the pizza or the corn first makes little difference to me or to God (as far as I know). Whether I put my left shoe on first or my right probably doesn’t have eternal consequence. But I do recommend putting socks on before shoes, and shoes on before running a marathon.

It really boils down to priorities. My priorities may not be the same as yours. That’s fine! God has not been specific in His Word about how to prioritize each aspect of our lives. Is education more important than starting a career? Is making money more importhan having a job you love? Is havECCLESIASTES 3 TELLS tant ing a job you love more important than having an active social life? Is spendUS THAT THERE IS A ing time with your friends more imTIME FOR EVERYTHING. portant than spending time with your family? Somewhere there is a balance, and you can evaluate your life and add these concepts into your own Project Here’s another easy example: Get Balance. married, and then have sex. Do in the right order! Get married, and then live Very important though: no conversatogether. God has a set order of things, tion on priorities would be complete without acknowledging that our priorand we should do in that order. ity numero uno is non-negotiable, if we There’s a logical order to managing fi- want to please God. Jesus said, nances too. My company has a 401k that will match my contributions, up “Love the Lord your God with all your to a certain percentage. Every penny heart and with all your soul and with all that my company matches is free your strength and with all your mind;” money – like a pay raise. However, if I and “Love your neighbor as yourdidn’t have enough money in the bank self,” in one way or another in three to pay my bills today, where would of the four gospels. Set your priorities be the wisdom in saving for 40 years straight, and then live your life in the from now? How will it hurt my credit if order that God intended. I default on payments now? How will a bad credit score affect my future? I always believe in saving, but I also believe that we should not store for ourselves treasures that can be destroyed (by a bad economy). Before we save

➍ ➎ ➏

⎟Center Ring⎟

Confidence

While You Wait By Thom Mollohan

“Well, I don’t know,” she responded. “I feel like I’ve got to do something.”

We talked a little more, prayed together, and then parted company with her only resolution being to pursue a relationship that was not Christ-centered—not exactly the kind of resolve she needed.

“

But I’m almost done with college and God still hasn’t done anything,” protested the young woman across from me in the campus coffee shop where I often held unofficial office hours as a campus pastor. Her voice was louder than she had intended and people at nearby tables cast a glance in our direction. Heedless of what others were thinking, she continued. “You say that God has a plan for me, but I don’t see it. I want to be with someone so badly, but it feels like God doesn’t care,” she said.

My heart hurt for that young Christian woman, partly for the pain of her loneliness, but mostly for the pain she was planning for herself as she forged her own path outside of God’s plan for her. Even then it seemed her life was about to take a turn in a tragic direction. Sadly, in her case, the result was the same as it has been for other men and women I have known in the last 20 years who traveled down this dangerous avenue rather than waiting on their loving God. Those chosen paths have been lined with heartache and brokenness, although in some cases, God brought some good out of tragedy.

In the June issue of Single!, John Buri, Ph.D., asked the question “Why wait to get

“But He does care,” I replied. “Don’t forget His promise to us in Romans 8:32: ‘He did not spare His own Son, but gave Him up for us all—how will He not also, along with Him, graciously give us all things?’”

married?” But for many of us, that question isn’t really applicable. Instead, we’re wondering why we have to wait. We’re eager to jump the broom, tie the knot and seal the deal—we just can’t find anyone to jump, tie and seal with!

Trusting God with our relationships seems to be a tricky thing. The world—the devil’s megaphone—likes to make us think that if we are single then something is wrong with us, either physically, or with our personalities. Then there’s impatience. It seems everyone around us already has that “someone special” making their life complete. Impatience can easily mutate into desperation which, in turn, can lead us astray from the walk of faith designed for us. On the flip side, we fail to realize that going without romantic love can be an excellent pipeline for us to experience the love of God. We are better able to celebrate something which can be called the “centrality of Christ,” the understanding that no relationship is remotely as critical, or as fulfilling, as our relationship with God. Solitude can also help us to practice the first part of “the greatest commandment,” which is to “love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind,” (Matthew 22:38). As Revelation 2:3 says, our souls long for our “first love,” who is Jesus Chris our Lord. It can be easier to focus on Him when He’s also our only love.

It’s common to look to a partner to provide that which only God can provide. However, unconditional love and acceptance cannot be consistently found in any human relationship—despite what we see in movies or hear through the messages of popular songs. Unless we are first grounded in the One who has already loved us unreservedly and approves of us with all our faults—demonstrated to us by the death of Jesus—we will fail to find another person who is able to complete us as we desire.

In addition, being single can be an opportunity to exercise the faith to which we have been called, as we consider what is at stake. God has a unique plan especially crafted out of the depths of His immense love for each one of us, but our spiritual enemy would like for nothing more—and wants nothing less— than to derail us from this perfect strategy. This is an attempt to steal our joy and peace, but also an attempt to sabotage our fruitfulness for God. King Solomon’s life illustrates this. Renown for his wisdom, Solomon undermined his effectiveness by giving his heart away to women who did not share his love for God. From a worldly perspective, these marriages made sense, but as a consequence, his heart turned away from the Lord. He failed to realize part of God’s blessing in his life and his actions negatively impacted his children and the entire nation of Israel (1 Kings 11). If we resist the tendency to act impulsively and foster desperation, we can be infinitely better positioned for God to use us and to increase our joy and peace. This doesn’t mean we have to give up the idea of marrying, but it will make our waiting more bearable. It can help to ask the following questions: If the Lord has in His plan for us a “special someone,” then wouldn’t he also share our calling? Wouldn’t he share our vision to know God and make Him known? As we attempt to answer these questions, the author of Hebrews encourages us with His words in chapter 10 verse 35, “So do not throw away your confidence: it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised.”

g Thom Mollohan is a husband, father, pastor and church planter, column writer, and author of THE FAIRY TALE PARABLES: Classic Fairy Tales Pointing to God’s Love and Truth. Visit him on the Web.

breakfast on the go O

ne of Tamara Jane’s strategies for a stress-free morning routine (see p. 18) is to make breakfast grab-and-go-able. Not exactly a novel concept, is it? Purveyors of breakfast grub have been tryin’ for the last decade or more to make it convenient for busy people to eat their grub on the run. Problem is, a lot of what has resulted is highcarb garbage. Some popular go-grub breakfast choices are yogurt, granola bars and instant oatmeal and they are loaded with sugar and may lack fiber. They’re better than nothin’ but I’m gonna steer away from the obvious and steer ya toward some simple grabbable grub that is healthy, easy on the budget and stuff you might not have thought about takin’ on the run. My jumpin’ off point was to ask myself, “What’s a good breakfast?” If time and a busy life-style weren’t interferin’, what would I make myself for breakfast? Some of my favorites are: half of a multigrain bagel with cream cheese and smoked salmon; a cheese omelet with some fresh fruit; a bowl of shredded mini wheats; pancakes; and oatmeal with lots of fruit and nut add-ins. Mmm Mmm – those ‘er some good breakfasts. Now, let’s see what we can do to create a grab-and-go version of each of these favorites. Some of these ideas are so simple that I’m hopin’ I don’t insult yur intelligence by fleshin’ ‘em out a bit. Most require a little prep the night before. Not as convenient as a granola bar, but a much healthier choice. Invest in a reusable lunch bag and load it up the night before with a Juicy Juice box or yur own reusable travel cup (or water bottle) with 100% juice or milk. Limit yurself to eight ounces of these high cal liquids. If yur thirstier than that, how about a blend of herbal tea with a few ounces of fruit juice. Drink all you want of that. Don’t forget the napkin because all these foods can be eaten with yur fingers.

▲ Multigrain bagel with cream cheese and smoked salmon: All

by reba ray 12

▲

you have to do is put this together the night before and wrap in foil. Sit it front n’ center on the fridge shelf and it will take you all of 5 seconds to get breakfast in the morning.

I will say that the smell of smoked salmon might not make you the most popular person in a carpool. Another drawback is you shouldn’t toast the bagel cuz it’ll end up too chewy. No matter, this is still a healthy favorite!

▲

Quiche and fresh fruit: Wash and chunk cantaloupe mixed with some strawberries or grapes the night before and put it in a small Rubbermaid container. Quiche on the go sounds trickier, but it’s not really if you’ll make yur quiche ahead in paper (not foil) muffin cups. Click here for a quiche recipe that uses cottage cheese and buttermilk (don’t knock it till you try it!), resultin’ in a healthy quiche. Yields 10 muffins – breakfast all week! If ya get tired of the same thing, freeze the rest of the muffin quiches and pull ‘em out the night before to thaw in the fridge. These suckers are gonna need 25 seconds (for 2 muffins) in the microwave to bring to room temperature, so this breakfast may actually take a full minute to pull together.

▲

Bowl of shredded miniwheats: That’s my favorite cereal, but

this will work for yur favorite too. Dish a cup of dry cereal into a sandwhich baggie. And load a travel cup half full with milk. Toss a spoon in yur reusable lunch pale and you can eat that cereal on the bus, train, in the carpool or once you get to work by just pourin’ the bag of cereal into the travel cup. You can prep all this the night before and leave it in the fridge. I do not recommend eatin’ anything with a spoon while you drive, so if the only time you have for breakfast is time behind a wheel, just eat the cereal dry and wash it down with the milk.

▲

Pancakes: OK, we’re gonna have to do a little compromisin’ here. Obviously, we’re not gonna be pourin’ syrup out as we drive and who has time to make pancakes in the morning! Make a small batch of pancakes the night before and put ‘em on a microwave-safe plate, covered with foil or plastic wrap and put them in the fridge. In the morning, pull ‘em out and stick ‘em in the microwave for 40 seconds (3-4 pancakes).

⎟reba ray⎟ As they’re heatin’, take out yur sweetin’ agent of choice: jam or powdered sugar. Spread jam on two pancakes and top them with the other two, making a couple of pancake and jam sandwiches. Or sprinkle all the cakes with powdered sugar. Wrap them in the same foil or plastic wrap they were covered with before and off you go.

▲

Oatmeal with Mix-ins: If you like granola bars, you oughta take that experience up a notch with the granola made from scratch. It’s easy to make and fun to experiment with. Make yurself a batch of homemade granola with any and every kind of add-in and flavorin’ yur heart desires: dried figs, ginger, dates, pineapple, cranberries, cherries, apricots, banana chips; chocolate, butterscotch, white chocolate and toffee chips; any and every kind of nut; pumpkin, sunflower, flax and chia seeds and wheat germ; vanilla, rum, almond, lemon or orange extract; and a blend of spices like ginger, cinnamon, ground clove, allspice, pumpkin pie spice, nutmeg or anise. Once you’ve got yur custom blend, take out what you’ll use in three-day’s time and freeze the rest. I recommend freezin’ one cup per sandwich bag, then put six sandwich bags in a large freezer bag. Then you can just pull out a bag of granola the night before and let it thaw on the counter. Eat granola like a cereal (same tips apply as for the mini-wheats), mix it in with a yogurt, or pop it right in yur mouth like trail mix.

They say breakfast is the most important meal of the day, and yet it comes at an awfully inconvenient time for the workin’ or studyin’ girl. But with a little bit of effort to prep tomorrow’s meal tonight, you can grab a breakfast for the road in less than a minute out of yur mornin’ routine.

â&#x17D;&#x;dear gabbyâ&#x17D;&#x;

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“ Then I considered all that my hands had done and the toil I had spent in doing it, and behold, all was vanity and a striving after wind, and there was nothing to be gained under the sun.”

Dear Pale, Gabby wants to you to take a good look at your butt. That’s right, that fishbelly pale place where the sun don’t shine – that is, on American beaches. And fortunately, because of our national terror over nude sunbathing, that’s just about the only place on your body that will resist laugh lines, crows feet and freckles for the rest of your life.Yes, the rest of your life! And believe it or not, at some point later on, you will wish that your face looked as good as that butt! Can you imagine what that adorable little derriere of the coppertone kid would look like today? Bigger, sure. But wait! What about her face? She would be about 50 now with skin as tough as leather. That’s because faces don’t lie; tan lines mean you’ve been exposed to UV radiation, which yields a rich harvest of wrinkles later in life. So toiling over a tan truly is pure folly. But I’m preaching to the choir, Pale, I know. And all butts aside, I’m sure you’ve heard the real, ugly truth about the sun’s radiation, according to the Skin Cancer Foundation, is that women aged 39 and under have a higher probability of developing melanoma than any other cancer except breast cancer. And that up to 90 percent of the visible changes commonly attributed to aging are caused by the sun. So Pale, you aren’t nuts. Every person should wear a sunscreen with an SPF (sun protection factor) that corresponds to their burning rate. For instance, if

Ecclesiastes 2:11

it takes a person 10 minutes to burn without sunscreen, an SPF 30 will allow them to be in the sun 30 times longer or 300 minutes, before burning, assuming it doesn’t sweat, rub or wash off. Make sure also to get a broad spectrum sunscreen that filters out both UVA and UVB rays. Read the labels. Both damage skin. Both can cause wrinkles. Both can cause cancer. For a good suggestion of a sunscreen that uses minerals, which are more effective against the sun’s damaging rays, and do not use harmful chemicals that can themselves cause cancer, see the Environmental Working Group’s list of Best Sunscreens. Then read over God’s message in Ecclesiastes. It relates directly to our human weakness of vanity. It tells us vanity is like striving to own the wind. And a tan is the perfect metaphor for vanity. So it is Gabby’s advice that you embrace your bland, veal-like exterior with a Joan of Arc-like fervor. Go ahead! Arm yourself with knowledge and perseverance, and short of ambushing your friend around corners with a spray can of sport sunscreen, keep on nagging her like the best friend you are. Really, is she going to stop being your friend over sunscreen? God gave us our marvelous shady gray blobs of brains to help us help ourselves. Use it and help your friend use hers. And don’t forget to reapply often.

- The Gabster

IT PAYS TO DISCOVER...

HOW TO MANAGE CREDIT WISELY BY JULIE ANN

New skinny jeans from the mall: $44. Plane ticket to Miami for spring break $382. Fuel topoff, Cool Ranch Doritos and a Super Slushie from the Quickie Stop: $18.20. Dinner out with friends: $16.13. Getting into serious debt and ruining your financial future: Priceless. Credit cards. To function in society it seems you can’t leave home without one. They are convenient and easy, but can haunt you for years if misused. However, if you use your credit cards wisely you don’t have to fear sabotaging your finances for life. The first question you may have is how to get a credit card? If you’re in college, it might be as easy as filling out a postcard form and mailing it in. Otherwise, you might need to establish a credit history, which can be a Catch 22 of sorts. To get credit, you need credit. It reminds me of a story I once heard about a young actor who couldn’t act in a film until he had his Screen Actors Guild card but he couldn’t get his SAG card until he had acted in a film. One of the best ways to obtain a credit card is through your bank. If you have an existing relationship in which you have proven yourself a good customer, your financial institution might be willing to take a chance and extend you some credit. Another route is to acquire a first credit card from a department store or gas station. Because you can only use your card at their establishment, they are often easier to obtain. Finally, if your lack of a credit history is still a problem, try a secured credit card. Essentially, you’ll deposit money in an account and the lender will hold onto this money to ensure that you make your payment.

CREDIT/DEBIT

When I got my first credit card I went with a credit/debit from my bank. This helped me learn how to wisely use a credit card because the funds were coming directly out of my checking account. After a few years I decided to get a regular credit card and went through my credit union. I’ve avoided store credit cards and toss out the weekly offers that arrive in the mail. I don’t see that I have a need for more than two cards. If you have a choice of what card you can get, select one with cash back rewards. The card is key. Once you’ve got it, where should you use it? Don’t go out of your way to use your card – there will be plenty of times when you have no other option or it’s not convenient, such as online retailers, airline reservations and pay-at-the-pump gas stations after the manned booth is closed. Using your card only when absolutely necessary will get your card plenty of

⎟SPARE CHANGE⎟

action, build your credit history and keep your statement balance down. When not to use the card: to buy big ticket items you can’t afford any other way. Only use your card for big purchases if you know you’ll have the money to pay it off when the bill arrives. Avoid using your card for dining out, groceries and trips to the mall. Sometimes it’s difficult to avoid using it for emergencies, such as a vehicle repair, but do your best to pay it off ASAP! When your monthly bill arrives make sure that you pay it promptly and in full. Missing a payment or being late will do major damage to your credit score in short order. Plus, you may have to pay a late fee ($30.00 or more). You will also want to pay your bill in full to avoid interest payments. New credit card rules now force companies to print the estimated total with interest if you were only to pay the minimum amount. Take a good look at that figure. For example, if you were to buy everything I listed at the beginning of this article, your total would be $473.85. Assuming a minimum monthly payment of 2.5 percent (or a fixed $11.85) and 18 percent interest, it would take five years and two months to pay off those purchases, making only the minimum payment. And you would have paid $255.03 in interest. You could practically buy another plane ticket for that amount!

MONTHLY BILL

Finally, beware of identity theft. A few months ago I opened up my statement to find a charge for $25.45 from a lighting company in Tampa. I was pretty sure that I would have remembered buying a lamp from Tampa, so I called the number listed on the card. It was disconnected! So I called my credit union to report a fraudulent change. They cancelled my card and issued me a new one. I then had to write a letter swearing that I did not make the charge nor did I authorize anyone else to do so on my behalf. The credit union then sent me a bunch of paperwork I had to fill out and have notarized. In the end the charge was removed from my card, but boy was it a giant hassle! Be prepared to watch for unauthorized activity and spending quite a bit of time and effort resolving issues should they arise.

IDENTITY THEFT

Credit cards can make your life easier, but they can also easily ruin your life.There is a certain convenience and even a necessity about them, but be sure to use your brain before throwing down your plastic or you can quickly find yourself everywhere that you don’t want to be. 17

m one of those super-organized people who get stressed out when things aren’t in order. So a long time ago, I developed a way to make getting ready in the morning a lot less stressful, and it’s had the pleasant side effect of making my morning routine very quick. Apparently it impresses people, because I’ve had several girls ask me how I do it! So here’s how, for everyone who ever asked. The key is to do a few simple things the night before and one really important thing first.

I love showering in the evening so I can go to bed feeling clean, rather than sleeping in the day’s grime. The downside is that my hair isn’t as fresh as it would be if I washed it in the morning. Bed head is no match for a good straightener, so that’s not a problem, but you should dry your hair before bed. If you let your hair air-dry, try showering a couple of hours before bed.

A big time killer in the morning is figuring out what to wear. Maybe it takes so long because our brains aren’t in high gear yet. That’s why it’s smart to pick out your clothes and shoes the night before. With the next day, modesty and the weather in mind, select an outfit and then stick with it the next morning – regardless of mood. You can’t trust a morning mood anyway. Another advantage to night-time wardrobe prep is that there is actually time to iron or sew on a button or find that special jewelry that goes perfectly – all things that the morning rush can edge out.

Is something special called for in hair or make-up? Based on tomorrow’s schedule and other factors such as the weather, think about what to do with hair and make-up. Important meeting? Plan a power up-do Sarah Palin style (which is not meant as a political endorsement, I’m just saying her up-do rocks). Walking during your lunch hour? Maybe a head band or other hair accessory to get your hair off your forehead and neck. Now, the icing (and no, I’m not suggesting you should cake it on). If you need your face to get you through an evening engagement, allot a little more time in the morning.

⎟Fashion DIVinA⎟

Now, really, I’m not a breakfast person, but maybe you are (I probably should be). I have a friend who loves to eat breakfast (well, any meal, for that matter), but she also loves to sleep late so she often doesn’t have time for breakfast. Sticking to the above tips should buy us some time in the morning, but if we’re still rushed in the morning, maybe we should set our alarm for five minutes earlier? What a concept, right? Not happening? Then stock up on healthy “grab and run” breakfast grub like granola bars (if you haven’t had one in a while, they’ve come a long way, Baby), string cheese and an apple, a muffin with a travel cup of milk or freeze a yogurt the night before and toss it in your purse to eat on the commute or after you get to where you’re going. There are many more possibilities, but the best will have five or more grams of protein. Do what you can the night before to make grabbing breakfast one fluid motion in the morning. Put fruit or granola bars in your bag the night before and put more perishable items right at the edge of the fridge or freezer shelf, so you don’t get flusterpated looking for them. Last, but actually first, we should always carve out some time first thing in the morning to greet the Heavenly Father and see if He has any special instructions for our day. Don’t rush this conversation if the alarm doesn’t go off.

We should always carve out some time first thing in the morning to greet the Heavenly Father and see if He has any special instructions for our day. The same force that orders the universe can make our hair behave, keep buttons from popping off on the way out the door, and turn all the traffic lights green. Or not! The best strategy for a stress-free morning is to start with our top priority.

by Tamara Jane