RVA Magazine Vol. 4 Iss. 2 Pretzel Logic by dougrva

www.stickyricefan.com

70 18

68 26

By Rob Lee

B y R a ndy H e s s

A D A G a lle ry At ADA Gallery on June 6th, a skate art show curated by Rob Lee, featuring the work of local and national artists who skateboard. Come shred the mini ramp installation. Anthony Pappalardo - Jerry Hsu - Jonathan Mehring The Spahr Brothers - Mickael Broth - Randy Hess Josh Bennett - Adrian Meyer - Jim Callahan - Rob Lee

ADA is located at 228 West Broad Street (cor ner of Broad and Madison). For more infor mation call (804) 644-0100 or go to www. adagaller y.com.

By Josh Bonnett

Bar r y B r une r www.bar r ybr uner.com

H o lly C a m p www.hollycamp.com

Richmond Illustrators Club Second Annual Juried Show O pe ning Rec e ption Friday, June 6 t h, f r o m 7 - 1 0 p m a t G ho s t p r int G a lle r y 2 2 0 W. B r o a d St . R ic hm o nd , VA 2 3 2 2 0 www.ghostprintg aller y.com (8 0 4 ) 2 4 4 - 1 5 5 7 1 p m - 7 p m We d ne s d ay - Sa t ur d ay o r by a p p o int m e nt Andr e w Wright www.andr e wrwright.com 15

T he a Dus kin www.ghostprint.com

St e v e n Wa lk e r www.ste venw alker studios.com

This year’s show had 183 entries from 49 different illustrators from all over the country. 45-50 pieces will be on display. The Richmond Illustrators Club co-chairs, Holly Camp and Katie McBride, curated the show. Participating local illustrators will include: Barry Bruner, Eric Collins, Doug Thompson, Steven Walker, Holly Camp, Katie McBride, Chris White, Andy Parrish, Kelly Alder, Raven Herrera, Neal Iwan, Kevin McFadin, with non-local illustrators Andrew Wright, Seounghyon Cho, Brooke Olivares and Angela Dominguez also participating. The Richmond Illustrators Club is a non-profit organization that provides information and promotion for the advancement of freelance illustrators and the illustration profession. The club has been in existence for almost 20 years, and if you’re a working illustrator in the Richmond area, odds are you’ve been involved with the club at some point. The members have worked in various aspects of the communication arts field, from editorial illustration to graphic design to fine art. Some of the club’s clients include National Public Radio, Christian Children’s Fund, NASA, Virginia Living Magazine, Rolling Stone, The Washington Post, Raven Tree Press and Virginia Commonwealth University. The club provides an opportunity to maintain and create contacts within the communication arts community, both in Richmond and with members of other regional illustrators clubs; it also offers members’ shows, juried shows, group promotional projects and a website to host portfolios and club news. For more info about Richmond Illustrators Club visit www.richmondillustratorsclub.blogspot.com K a t ie M c B r id e www.katiemcbride.com

Se o ung hyo n C ho www.c hoillustr ation.com

Bringe r o f

G re at e r Th i n g s

A n I n t e rv i e w w i t h Mickael Broth

By Par ker

I fir st came across Mickael Broth’s wor k when I star ted seeing his now infamous “Refuse To Be Smar t” sticker s and roller pieces pop up around Richmond in the ear ly 2000s. It was a simple, stenciled visual image of a figure looking straight at you often accompanied with the tagline. To me it was a beautiful but aggressive statement that made you ponder an inter pretation of the meaning. It gave you a wink, grabbed you, pried your eyes open a little wider and made you want to look deeper into the wor ld around you. “Refused To Be Smar t” reiterated my refusal to be stupid by not being a spoon-fed, cookie cutter, robot content on swallowing all the bullshit society was tr ying to feed me and think for myself. Mickael was ar rested in 2004 for his “crimes” and had to spend 11 months in the slammer. He emerged with a new direction for his ar twor k, star ted Wilted Roses and is constantly commissioned to do mural/poster/graphic design wor k. His wor k is now shown in galleries around Richmond (and beyond). With no slowing down in sight, Mickael Broth has become one of the hardest wor king and most talented ar tists in the city.

Parker What’s new with WiltedRoses? Any big things coming up on the horizon? Mickael Broth Well WiltedRoses as a company has pretty much changed. Brionna (my wife) star ted teaching last fall and will be going back to school to get her master’s degree this fall, so she doesn’t have much time at all (much less for making pur ses), and I am tr ying to make ar t my actual job so I’m not as into printing shir ts lately. I’m sure we’ ll still make shir ts in limited r uns from time to time, but basically WiltedRoses has just become the name of my ar t website. P The last times we hung out, we discussed the abuses

of power, lies, cover-ups and cor r uption our gover nment (and a cer tain organized religion) are involved in (I watched ZEITGEIST the next night...WOW!). Some of your new pieces are visually less complicated and blatantly more political…sor t of a singular symbolic visual punch. Is this something that you are going to explore more? MB Yeah, the “haloed” pieces are par t of a series I’m

wor king on called “Bringer of Greater Things”. The title comes from a Propagandhi song with the same title. That song addresses all of the “wonderful” things that “civilized” cultures have brought to the wor ld (environmental destr uction, enslavement, genocide, to name a few). The series I’m wor king on focuses on some of America’s contributions to the wor ld (from secret prisons to Thickburger s).

P If you could say anything to George Bush right now

what would it be? Should I get the boxing gloves prepared? MB Honestly, I wouldn’t know how to express my ha-

tred in single syllable words, which after all is the only way he would be able to under stand me. P Some of your other new pieces are extremely col-

orful and seem to be a progression of the flowing, car toonish style you’ ve been perfecting over the last couple of year s. Care to discuss these new experiments?

MB Yeah. Basically I just needed to add something

P Why do you think Richmond, as a city that has so

and ink washes seemed like a way to expand my wor k. Technically, ink washes are great with pen wor k, and it helps to bring out cer tain details that I think might get lost otherwise.

many talented ar tists and a rapidly growing creative community, is so intent on prosecuting street ar tists to the fullest extent of the law? Do you think Richmond will ever have “legal walls”?

P I know you are probably sick of talking about this

MB Because assholes like Steve Nuckols and the rest of the Fan District Association are intent on controlling ever y aspect of their environment and they have the money to hold sway with politicians. I could go on for a long time about how there are plenty of more impor tant problems these people could address, but it all comes down to the fact that those with money get their voices heard (and stamp out the voices of those who they disagree with).

but how does it feel to go from a “graffiti vandal” (notice the quotation mar ks) to someone who now does signage and commissioned murals for businesses as well as being shown in galleries? MB It feels like a pretty natural progression to me. I

love graffiti and wish I could still be involved, but I’ ve got too many awesome things going in my life that would be put at risk for a relatively small reward. I love painting walls and doing large wor k so that’s the main reason I do signage and showing in a galler y is fun, too. It feels good to have people appreciate your wor k, but it’s definitely a ver y different feeling from graffiti where the satisfaction came from knowing your wor k pissed people off... I guess I’ ve got to wor k on doing that with my galler y wor k. P You just won a Virginia Museum Fellowship Award

recently (only 31 ar tists across the state receive the award). How does it feel for your wor k to be recognized by such a “prestigious” entity such as the VMFA? See any irony in the situation?

MB It feels fucking awesome to get the recognition

and the money from a cool museum. It felt even better to get letter s from gover nment officials thanking me for being a valuable par t of the ar tistic community. As par t of the award, I got to go to the General Assembly and be recognized by all those scumbag liar s. I thought it was pretty great that three year s ago they passed a new law in response to my ar rest, and now they invite me there to be honored as an outstanding member of the community. Now I just need to piss them all off again. I think I will have achieved success when they haul me off for being a “freedom hater”.

As far as the “legal walls” business goes I don’t get it. There is no such thing as “legal graffiti” and legal walls generally tur n into a shitty mess of wack ass kids tr ying to act like they are thugs. Commissioned murals (whether graffiti or otherwise) are great for the visual appeal of a city, and we could definitely use more... but interesting murals, not just some giant painting of the Jamestown landing (8th and Main... not that it’s ter ribly executed, it’s just fucking boring). P It seems like there has been a growing popularity

over the last few year s in for mer (and cur rent) street ar tists. Banksy, Shepard Fairey, Dalek and other s are 21

now big player s in the ar t “game” where a few year s ago they were viewed as criminals. Galleries wouldn’t have touched them. How do you see the ar t wor ld changing as far as trends and what’s “acceptable”? MB I guess it’s tr ue that people love a rebel and

despite “street culture” having been co-opted by cor porations, tr ue vandals still function outside of the law and against the framewor k of society. That sor t of renegade life is exciting to most people and by suppor ting it they get to feel like they are par t of it. The people you named (along with plenty of other s) are incredibly talented both as legal and illegal ar tists, and thankfully their skill and deter mination are now helping them pay the bills. The ar t wor ld seems just like any other mar ketplace where trends come and go so maybe in a next season “street ar t” won’t be such a good “investment”. I think the tr uly talented people who are able to translate their lifestyle and beliefs into their ar t will always be creating great wor k no what the mar ket is calling for.

B r i n g e r o f G r e at e r T h i n g s New Wor k by Mickael Elliot Broth Opening Reception at ADA Galler y on Saturday, June 14th, from 7pm-10pm with the show r unning through July 19th ADA is located at 228 West Broad Street (corner of Broad and Madison). For more infor mation call (804) 644-0100 or go to www.adagaller y.com. To see more of Mickael’s wor k go to www.wiltedroses.com

P ho t o by Ad am Wa lc av a -

Time and Money GWAR’S BIGGEST ENEMIES By Browning Keister

photos by Coy Koehler + Adam Walcav acae

O u r m o d e r n s o c i e t y i s i n d i r e n e e d o f a u n i f y i n g m y t h o l o g y. T h i s i s a u n i q u e position to find our selves in. Until Nietzsche declared God to be dead with a n a u t h o r i t y ye t t o b e s e r i o u s l y c h a l l e n g e d i n p h i l o s o p h i c a l c i r c l e s , p e o p l e and cultures around the wor ld for med various stories and gods to explain the wor kings of the wor ld around us and to illustr ate the foibles and follies, as well as the compassion and kindness inherent in human nature. The g o d s c a m e t o i n s t r u c t , n o t m e r e ly t o e x p l a i n o r c o n d e m n . H o w e v e r, a s w e developed, our gods became antiquated, and their instr uctions became out of touch, which made their explanations ludicrous and therefor e their cond e m n a t i o n s i r r e l e v a n t , a t b e s t . Fo r a l l b u t t h e m o s t f u n d a m e n t a l , p hy s i c s and biology have supplemented, if not completely supplanted, r eligion in its c a p a c i t y o f ex p l a i n i n g t h e t r a p p i n g s o f n a t u r e . P s y c h o l o g y h a s p r o v i d e d a similar effect (and perhaps affect) to religion in the arena of explanations o f h u m a n n a t u r e . Ye t j u s t a s m a n k i n d ’ s d e s i r e f o r t h e r i t u a l o f r e l i g i o n h a s not seemed to vanish because of our disbelief in the gods, neither has our desire for their stories diminished because of our widespread atheism. At the same time as the gods began to be subjects to the wor ms of the g r o u n d , n e w a n d ex c i t i n g d e v e l o p m e n t s b e g a n t o o c c u r i n t h e m a n y f i e l d s of ar ts & enter tainment. As often as not, these revolutions were caused by, c o r r e l a t e d t o, o r c o i n c i d e d w i t h p a r a l l e l d e v e l o p m e n t s i n s c i e n c e . Re corded music, film, comic books and television have tr ansfor med how what w a s o n c e o u r o r a l t r a d i t i o n i s h a n d e d d o w n t o u s. A n d w h i l e t h e r e p e r c u s sions of the Inter net on stor ytelling has yet to be completely felt, ther e i s a d e a r t h o f t r u ly l a r ge r t h a n l i f e e n t i t i e s w h o s e v e r y b e i n g i s r e l e v a n t t o o u r e v e r yd ay l i f e , n o t t o m e n t i o n h e l p i n g t o i n s t r u c t , e x p l a i n a n d , y e s ,

e v e n c o n d e m n o u r b e h a v i o r. T h i s i s n o t t o s ay t h a t t h e s e m e d i u m s h a v e n o t m a d e t h e e f f o r t . Fr o m S u p e r m a n t o S t a r Wa r s , f r o m Wa g n e r ’ s R i n g C yc l e t o t h e Wo r l d Wi d e We b, w e f i n d a r t i s t s a n d s t o r y t e l l e r s a s p i r i n g t o t a k e t h e i r p l a c e i n t h e n o w v a c a n t p a n t h e o n . Ye t t h e c r y c o n t i n u e s t o i s s u e f r o m t h e m a s s e s – t o p r o v i d e t h e m w i t h s o m e t h i n g s o m e h o w l a r g e r t h a n l i f e . M a ny have begun to feel their cries are in vain. B u t , L o ! T h e C a l l o f t h e M a s s e s i s A n s w e r e d ! A n e w a g e o f h o p e i s a l r e a dy u p o n u s ! Fo r t h e r e e x i s t s i n o u r o w n f a i r l a n d s s o m e o n e w h o a n s w e r s. A voice cr ying in the wilder ness, proclaiming the good news of fantastical intergalactic pirates bent on destr uction, stuck on our pitiful, desolate rock, desper ate to escape, yet at least mildly amused with our weakness a n d i g n o r a n c e , m i l d l y p l a c a t e d w i t h o u r g l o r i o u s i n t ox i c a n t s a n d m i l d ly a p preciative of our mindless submission. A voice answering our cr y with their own, which is to “...give the people what they want...the senseless s l a u g h t e r o f t h e g u t t e r s l i m e . . . b e c a u s e w h e n yo u r l i f e a i n’ t s h i t , yo u a i n’ t got much to lose...” Fo r n e a r l y 2 5 y e a r s t h e a r t i s t s a t S l a v e P i t , t h e h i g h p r i e s t s o f G WA R , h a v e “left their bloody mar k all over this town”. T heir peculiar br and of “multiplatfor m, multimedia” commentar y comes closest to replicating the numero u s w ay s t h a t o u r o l d t i m e r e l i g i o n s u s e d t o p a s s o n t h e i r m o r a l i t y p l ay s. N o n e o f t h e m o d e r n m e d i a h a v e b e e n l e f t u n t o u c h e d by S l a v e P i t . A n d a s n e w f o r m s d e v e l o p, yo u c a n c o u n t o n S l a v e P i t t o i n j e c t t h e my t h o s o f G WA R i n t o e a c h a n d e v e r y o n e . F u e l e d by c r a c k c o c a i n e a n d f r e s h s o u l s f o r t h e Wo r l d M a g g o t , t h e y p e r s e v e r e i n d e c i m a t i n g o u r p o p u l a t i o n , d e c a p i t a t i n g our leader s, and enslaving all who r emain. But in all seriousness, Slave Pit has been providing our postmoder n culture with a tr uly postmoder n mythology since their inception. Their modest stud i o s p a c e i n A n t a r c t i c a … e r, M a n c h e s t e r, q u i e t l y h u m s w i t h s u bv e r s i v e a c t i v i t y s t i l l . S t a r t i n g i n a n a g e w h e n m u s i c v i d e o s w e r e u s u a l ly t h e a p o t h e o s i s 27

t o u c h s t o n e s o f o u r c u l t u r e h e r e , f e w c a r r y t h e w e i g h t t h a t G WA R c a r r i e s. I t w o u l d n o t b e hy p e r b o l i c t o s ay t h e y a r e a s i n t r i n s i c t o R i c h mond as Patrick Henr y or Jeffer son Davis, as white flight or cor r upt c o u n c i l m e m b e r s , a s C h u r c h H i l l o r t h e J a m e s R i v e r. I r e c e n t ly h a d the chance to speak with Dave Brockie, and again with Bob Gor man a n d M a t t M a g u i r e o f S l a v e P i t , a b o u t a l l t h i n g s G WA R i n a n t i c i p a t i o n o f t h e i r M ay 3 0 t h s h o w a n d t h e i r u p c o m i n g 2 5 t h a n n i v e r s a r y. A s a b o n u s , I w a s l u c k y t o h a v e m y l i f e s p a r e d by t h e f e a r e d O d e r u s U r u n g u s , w h o v o u c h s a f e d m y l i f e o n t h e c o n d i t i o n I r e l ay h i s d r e a d r e q u e s t s t o t h e “ h u m a n f i l t h ” r e s i d i n g i n R VA .

o f ex p r e s s i o n f o r m u s i c a l g r o u p s , G WA R b e g a n w i t h b i g g e r t a r g e t s i n t h e i r s i g h t s. O v e r t h e i r c a r e e r t h ey h a v e b e e n r e s p o n s i b l e f o r m u s i c , p a i n t i n g s , i l l u s t r a t i o n s , s c u l p t u r e s, f i l m s, c o m i c s a n d t h e a t r i c a l p e r f o r m a n c e s. T h e y h a v e a p p e a r e d i n T V, f i l m a n d v i d e o g a m e s, s h o w c a s e d t h e i r a r t i s t r y i n s m o k y b a r s a n d h i g h c l a s s g a l leries and influenced Brendan Small and Lordi alike. R i c h m o n d h a s i n r e c e n t y e a r s i n c r e a s i n g ly b e c o m e a m e t a - t o w n . W h i l e t h e m e t ropolitan population of Richmond has grown to 1.3 million people, much of what we speak of when we talk about Richmond is the underground culture we have created here – one that largely ser ves as a foil to the “redneck, backwoods, hick t o w n ” ge n t r i f i e d R i c h m o n d t h a t w e a l l d e s p i s e . A n d a m i d t h e m u l t i t u d e o f t e m p o r a l 28

D u r i n g 2 5 y e a r s , m o s t b a n d s c o m e a n d g o. A n y m u s i c f a n , e s p e c i a l ly w h e n h i s t a s t e s r u n t o w a r d t h e u n d e r g r o u n d , w i l l f i n d n o p r o bl e m r e c a l l i n g a n e n c y c l o p e d i c l i s t o f b a n d s t h a t h a v e c o m e a n d go n e f r o m t h e i r o w n h o m e t o w n . R VA i s c e r t a i n l y n o e x c e p t i o n . T h i s t r a n s i e n c e i s a s t a r k c o n t r a s t t o t h e “ r o a d k i n g s ” o f G WA R . I a s k e d M a t t M a g u ir e near ly two and a half year s ago what he thought of the cur rent s c e n e , a n d h e t o l d m e , “ T h e y ’ l l f a l l o f f. A n d w e ’ l l s t i l l b e d o i n g t h i s. ” H i s r e m a r k s b e c o m e o n l y m o r e a p p r o p r i a t e w i t h e a c h ye a r. W h i l e cur r ent ar t tr ends seem to nudge ever closer to a complete and total emulation of their style, they r emain the fir st, the best, and the most cutting edge of them all. W h e n a h i g h f a l u t i n m u s i c c r i t i c t e l l s m e d a m n n e a r a ny t h i n g a b o u t a band’s “ar tistic merit” I want to shit. When any other band professes to have the most exciting show in rock and roll, I either giggle or c r i n g e , d e p e n d i n g o n t h e i r m e a g e r t a l e n t s. B u t G WA R h a s e a r n e d t h e r i g h t t o t h e i r b r a v a d o. W h o e l s e w i l l s t a n d u p t o p r e s i d e n t s, t e r r o r i s t s a n d t a l k s h o w h o s t s ? W h o w i l l k i l l i n d i s c r i m i n a t e ly ? W h o will dump hundr eds of gallons of blood, urine and semen onto the huddled masses? T h e a b i l i t y t o s e r i o u s l y c a l l G WA R t h e b e s t s h o w i n r o c k a n d r o l l

c o m e s w i t h a h e f t y p r i c e . “ P r o b a bly t h e m o s t p hy s i c a l ly d e m a n d i n g t h i n g i s a c t u a l ly d o i n g t h e s h o w. . . yo u ’ r e w e a r i n g 6 0 p o u n d s o f bl o o dy l a t ex , a n d I ’ m t r y i n g t o b e l l o w l y r i c s a n d f i g h t m o n s t e r s , a n d these guys are r unning around, going cr azy backstage, jumping in a n d o u t o f c o s t u m e s, t a k i n g c a r e o f ex p l o d i n g c o m p r e s s o r s , f l a i l i n g s p e w l i n e s, a n d k e e p i n g t h e c r o w d u n d e r c o n t r o l , ” D a v e B r o c k i e n o t e s. B o b G o r m a n f i n d s i t d i f f i c u l t t o k e e p a n o r m a l l i f e . “ W h e n w e w e r e yo u n ge r, d o i n g t h a t [ G WA R ] a n d j u s t d o i n g t h a t w a s f i n e . B u t a s yo u ge t o l d e r, yo u k n o w, h e a l t h c a r e . . . s h i t t h a t n o r m a l p e o p l e [ h a v e ] , yo u k n o w, w e d o n’ t h a v e a ny o f t h a t a n d , yo u k n o w, yo u s t a r t thinking about that more.” He also finds that his “love of live music h a s b e e n c r u s h e d ” f r o m h i s ye a r s i n G WA R . “ We s p e n d s e v e n m o n t h s o u t o f t h e ye a r, o n a go o d y e a r, i n c l u b s. W h e n I g e t h o m e p e o p l e a r e l i k e ‘ O h , t h e r e ’ s t h i s c r a z y k i d b a n d ’ . . . I d o n’ t h a v e i t i n m e . We ’ l l have to stop touring for a couple of year s before the desire to go in a h o t , s t e a m y c l u b a n d b e s u r r o u n d e d by p e o p l e c o m e s b a c k . ” D a v e d o e s f i n d h e i s a b l e t o m a k e a n e x c e p t i o n f o r F i r s t Fr i d ay, a l t h o u g h i t i s n’ t f o r t h e a r t o r t h e b a n d s a s m u c h a s “ w a t c h i n g t h e s e c h i c k s walk around in their little sundresses”. T h e t i m e a n d e f f o r t S l a v e P i t p u t s i n t o G WA R i s n e a r l y s u p e r h u m a n , a n d n e a r ly a s s t r e n u o u s a s t h e p hy s i c a l s h o w s. “ G WA R t a k e s u p s o much of our time. It takes so much time just to do the things we’re ge t t i n g p a i d t o d o r i g h t n o w – b u i l d a n e w s h o w, m a k e a n e w a l b u m , a n d ge t r e a dy t o go o n t h e r o a d a g a i n , ” D a v e o p i n e s. “ We ’ r e p r e t t y m u c h d o o m e d t o s u p p o r t G WA R n o m a t t e r w h a t , t o t h e e x c l u s i o n o f h a v i n g a ny t h i n g e l s e g o i n g o n i n o u r l i v e s , a n d t h a t i n c l u d e s r e l a t i o n s h i p s. W h e n yo u a r e e n s l a v e d by G WA R yo u t r u l y a r e e n s l a v e d by G WA R . ” T h e r e ’ s c l e a r ly a r e a s o n t h e i r p r o d u c t i o n c o m p a n y i s c a l l e d S l a v e P i t , I n c . Fo r t y h o u r s a w e e k s e e m s t o b e a b a r e m i n i m u m w i t h t h e s e g u y s, i f n o t m o r e . S t i l l , a l l m a n a g e t o f i n d s o m e l i t t l e a m o u n t o f t i m e t o p u r s u e t h e i r o w n i n d i v i d u a l a r t i s t i c i n t e r e s t s. D a v e d o e s

c u s t o m p a i n t i n g s , d r a w i n g s a n d t a t t o o d e s i g n s , t h o u g h h e ’ s n o l o n ge r a c c e p t i n g r e q u e s t s d u e t o a h u g e b a c k l o g. M a t t d o e s s o m e m o v i e a n d t h e a t r e w o r k , a n d B o b w e l d s a n d w o r k s o n b i k e s. “ W h e n yo u p u t a l l o f yo u r t h o u g h t a n d c r e a t i v e j u i c e s i n t o [ G WA R ] , yo u g e t d r a i n e d . Yo u w a n n a g e t h o m e , d r i n k a b e e r a n d w a t c h a m o n s t e r m o v i e , ” B o b s ay s. G WA R h a s s e e n p l e n t y o f c h a n g e s o v e r t h e y e a r s. T h e e a r l y y e a r s w e r e c h a o t i c , a s S l a v e P i t h a d w h a t t h e y s ay w e r e t o o m a n y a r t i s t s , e a c h t h i n k i n g t h e i r i d e a s w e r e b e s t . T h i n g s w e r e r a r e l y d o n e t h e s a m e w ay t w i c e . Pe r h a p s t h e i r f i n ge r s w e r e i n a f e w t o o m a n y p i e s. Wi t h t h e a r t i s t s t r y i n g t o b u i l d c o s t u m e s, m a k e m o v i e s a n d c o m i c b o o k s a n d w r i t e m u s i c a l l a t t h e s a m e t i m e , t h e m u s i c q u i c k ly d e v o l v e d 29

into pop-punk slapstick, and the member s began to take notice that the quality of t h e o t h e r p r o j e c t s w a s b e g i n n i n g t o s l i p. A r o u n d 2 0 0 0 , t h e d e c i s i o n w a s m a d e t o m a k e a “ l e a n e r, m e a n e r ” G WA R , t o f o c u s o n w h a t t h e y d i d b e s t a n d w h a t w a s b e s t r e c e i v e d by t h e i r f a n s. T h e y b e g a n t o r e a l i z e t h a t t i m e a n d m o n e y w e r e m u c h m o r e p r e c i o u s c o m m o d i t i e s. A s B o b s ay s , “ t h e o l d G WA R d i e d i n 2 0 0 0 ” . O f c o u r s e , yo u c a n’ t p l e a s e a l l t h e f a n s. A n e m a i l t h e y h a v e p o s t e d i n t h e i r o f f i c e i s t e l l i n g :

i h a v e b e e n a g w a r f a n fo r 1 0 ye a r s a n d i j u s t w a n t e d t o s ay t h e n e w a l bu m s u x d o n k ey d i c k . i h a v e l o v e d e v e r y o n e o f g w a r ’ s c d ’ s. Vi o l e n c e h a s a r r i v e d bu t n o t g w a r. O h by t h e w ay w h e r e a r e a l t h e o t h e r b a n d m e m b e r s. yo u h a v e l o s t yo u r f u n ny e d ge . w e l l a t l e a s t i go t o n e n e w g w a r a l bu m o r i s i t D B X ? - s a d l o n g t e r m f a n

H o w e v e r t h e f u t u r e s t i l l h o l d s m u c h p o s s i b i l i t y. S l a v e P i t o w n s a l l t h e i r i n t e l l e c t u a l p r o p e r t y, a n d s o o n w i l l h a v e t h e r i g h t s t o t h e i r e n tir e back catalogue. As Dave explained, any of the non-band chara c t e r s c a n b e f o l d e d b a c k i n a t a n y t i m e t h e y p l e a s e . Fa n s w i l l b e d e l i g h t e d t o k n o w o f t h e r e t u r n o f S l e a z y P. M a r t i n i t h i s f a l l . T h e r e i s t a l k o f a G WA R v i d e o g a m e , a n o n l i n e i n t e r a c t i v e G WA R w o r l d a l a Wo r l d o f Wa r c r a f t o r S e c o n d L i f e , a n d t h e o n l i n e r e t u r n o f S l a v e P i t f u n n i e s. W h i l e t h e a g e o f d i r e c t t o v i d e o r e l e a s e s w i t h e v e r y a l b u m i s o v e r, G WA R a c k n o w l e d g e s t h e p o s s i b i l i t y o f m o r e h a p p e n i n g i n t h e f u t u r e , a l t h o u g h t h e y w o u l d r a t h e r h a v e t h e bu d ge t t o d o i t f o r a t h e a t r i c a l r e l e a s e . T h e y s t i l l w o u l d l i k e t o d o a B r o a d w ay s h o w. A c o f f e e t a b l e b o o k s h o u l d b e c o m i n g i n 2 0 0 9 . A n d t h e n ther e ar e projects so super secr et that they cannot be mentioned. In the meantime, Oder us Ur ungus will be hosting the Metal Hammer G o l d e n G o d s A w a r d s i n L o n d o n , “ w h i c h i s l i k e t h e E m my s o f m e t a l . I ’ m g o n n a a n n o u n c e t h a t G WA R w i n s i n e v e r y o n e ! ” O f i n t e r e s t t o R i c h m o n d e r s , o u r o w n M u n i c i p a l Wa s t e i s n o m i n a t e d f o r b e s t u n d e r g r o u n d b a n d , a n d G WA R u r g e s yo u t o v o t e f o r t h e m o n t h e M e t a l H a m m e r w e b s i t e . I n s h o r t , G WA R i s c o n f i d e n t t h a t t h e i r e f f o r t s w i l l bring them the r ecognition and r espect they deser ve, although Dave a c k n o w l e d g e s p e r h a p s t h i n g s c o u l d h a v e b e e n e a s i e r “ i f I h a d n’ t g o n e t h r o u g h , yo u k n o w, t h e l a s t t w e n t y - t h r e e y e a r s w i t h my c o c k hanging out, but I felt it was impor tant.” S l a v e P i t i s o p e n a b o u t t h e i n f l u e n c e R i c h m o n d h a s o n i t s o r i g i n s. B o b c r e d i t s R i c h m o n d ’ s f e r t i l i t y t o t h e a b u n d a n c e o f b a n d s, c h e a p w a r e h o u s e s p a c e a n d t h e c o n s t a n t s u p p l y o f VC U g r a d s a n d d r o p o u t s. T h e y l o v e p l ay i n g w i t h “ s t r a i g h t u p m e t a l b a n d s ” a n d f i n d g r e a t p l e a s u r e t h a t R VA i s f u l l o f t h e m . “ Pe o p l e a r e l i k e ‘ R i c h m o n d ? W h a t t h e , w h a t t h e h e l l ? W hy d o s o m a n y g r e a t b a n d s c o m e o u t o f t h i s t o w n ? ’ ” D a v e s ay s. H o w e v e r, d o n’ t q u e s t i o n w h o i s t h e m o s t “ R i c h m o n d ” o f t h e m a l l . “ We ’ r e t h e u l t i m a t e R i c h m o n d b a n d , ” D a v e

e x p l a i n s. “A b u n c h o f f r u s t r a t e d a n d f a i l e d a r t i s t s i n t h e i r o w n w e i r d l i t t l e w o r l d t h ey ’ v e c r e a t e d f o r t h e m s e l v e s – t h a t ’ s v e r y R i c h m o n d . G WA R c o u l d n’ t h a v e h a p p e n e d a ny w h e r e e l s e . ” F i n a l ly, “ O d e r u s w o u l d l i k e t o t a k e t h i s o p p o r t u n i t y t o a n n o u n c e t o t h e p e o p l e o f R i c h m o n d , t h e b a c k w a t e r, r e d n e c k , h i c k t o w n t h a t i t i s, t h a t h e i s s u p p o r t i n g D i r t w o m a n’ s c a n d i d a c y f o r m ayo r ; a n d i f D i r t w o m a n i s e l e c t e d a s t h e m ayo r, I w i l l l e t D i r t w o m a n s u c k m y c u t t l e f i s h i n S h a f e r C o u r t f o r e v e r yo n e t o s e e . I ’ m b a c k i n g D o n n i e C o r k e r, a . k . a . D i r t w o m a n ; I ’ m h e a d o f S ex c u r i t y f o r h i s c a m p a i g n . I’m taking this oppor tunity to urge the people of Richmond to vote f o r D i r t w o m a n … f i n a l ly g e t s o m e b o dy c o m p e t e n t i n t h e o f f i c e o f t h e m ayo r, a n d O d e r u s h i s M i n i s t e r o f S ex u a l A f f a i r s , t o d i s t r i bu t e A I D S a n d f r e e c r a c k t o a nyo n e w h o d a r e s t o v o t e f o r h i m . ”

G WA R u r ge s yo u t o v o t e fo r M u n i c i p a l Wa s t e fo r b e s t u n d e r g r o u n d b a n d i n t h e M e t a l H a m m e r G o l d e n G o d s A w a r d s. G WA R a l s o u r ge s yo u t o v i s i t t h e i r w e b s i t e , w w w. g w a r. n e t . T h e A r t i s t s o f S l a v e P i t , I n c . u r ge yo u t o a l s o v i s i t t h e i r w e b s i t e , w w w. s l a v e p i t i n c . c o m a n d t o v i s i t t h e p e r s o n a l w e b s i t e s o f t h e a r t i s t s, w h i c h c a n b e fo u n d by fo l l o w i n g l i n k s f r o m t h e S l a v e P i t s i t e . G WA R i s o f f e r i n g h a l f o f f a d m i s s i o n t o a nyo n e w h o b r i n g s t h e m t h e h e a d o f Pa p a U k r o p o r D a d dy L o v i n g t o t h e i r s h o w a t T h e N a t i o n a l , M ay 3 0 t h , a t 8 p. m . T h e N a t i o n a l i s l o c a t e d a t 7 0 8 E . B r o a d , R i c h m o n d , VA 2 3 2 1 9 . Browning Keister would like to thank Dave Brockie, Bob Gor man a n d M a t t M a g u i r e fo r t a k i n g t i m e o u t o f t h e i r bu s y s c h e d u l e fo r t h i s i n t e r v i e w a n d a l l o f t h e a r t i s t s o f S l a v e P i t fo r a l l t h e i r h a r d w o r k e n t e r t a i n i n g u s m a g go t s.

Loving His Black T-Shirts, Metal

and the World through Music:

An Interview with Craig Pfunder of VHS or Beta By Wendy Hsu Pho to s by Camer o n Le wi s

Craig Pfunder fronts the dance punk band VHS or Beta. Fir st emerged as a noise punk band in Louisville, Kentucky in the 90s and now signed onto Astralwer ks, the band recently released Bring on the Comets (2007), an album consisting of songs that mixed two worlds of music – electronic dance and rock – that no one believed would collide in the 1990s. VHS or Beta offered us a set of intense love for music, fun and m o v e m e n t a t t h e To a d ’ s P l a c e i n R i c h m o n d ’ s S h o c k o e B o t t o m o n A p r i l 1 2 , 2 0 0 8 . Before sound check, Pfunder sat down with me and spilled details about his background and insightful thoughts on the changing social and cultural landscape of indie rock. He told stories that verge on being a social and historical scr utiny of indie music. Craig Pfunder’s self-conscious, critical lens brings out indie rock music’s cultur al ebb and flow with convincing fr ankness. W e n d y H s u Te l l m e a b o u t y o u r t r a i n i n g o r i n f l u e n c e s . Craig Pfunder I never r eally had any for mal tr aining. T he only for mal tr aining I had was when I was in middle school. I was playing saxophones when I was a kid. Ever ything is pretty much self-taught. I got my fir st guitar when I was in sixth grade and just kept playing, playing and playing songs. At some point I really wanted it [for mal training], because I was really interested in the technical aspect of music. I still think that having a background in some sor t of music theor y is good, because I still retain that, and I was teaching myself music theor y when I was in high school.

W H T h a t ’ s r e a l l y c o o l a c t u a l l y. W h a t d i d y o u d o ?

Did you find music

textbooks? C P Ye a h , t e x t b o o k s … t e a c h i n g m y s e l f c h o r d s , t h e o r y a n d s c a l e s . WH Does that affect what you do now? CP We l l , h a v i n g t h e k n o w l e d ge , t h e fo u n d a t i o n a l k n o w l e d ge o f t h i n g s, c a n h e l p. A n d I t h i n k w i t h m u s i c , s o m e t i m e s p e o p l e g e t o v e r - s c h o o l e d . Sometimes they have a tendency to lose the imaginative par t of music. I know a lot of people who can sight-r ead anything. T hen when I ask t h e m t o c o m p o s e a s o n g , t h e n t h e y s a y, “ I d o n ’ t r e a l l y … ” I g u e s s i t boils down to the person. WH What about influences?

CP Ear ly on, I was just influenced by a lot of differ ent things, almost anything that my ear s grabbed onto that I could like. I guess when I fir st star ted playing music there was a lot of weird metal in the 80s. At the same time, I was listening to college rock, or the music that was being claimed as college rock at the time like REM. I really embraced that kind of music as well. I think I ended up going more o f t h e a l t e r n a t i v e e n d , i n s t e a d o f t h e m e t a l e n d . Yo u k n o w, w e w e r e p l a y i n g e a r l y M e t a l l i c a i n t h e b a n d t h e o t h e r d a y. T h a t k i n d o f m u s i c still resonates with me, and I enjoy listening to it. At the same time, I just got the new REM record. WH I totally hear REM in your music. CP Sor t of my ear ly influences. I think they’ r e probably in my top 10 bands of all time.

WH What do you think of indie rock in gener al? What do you think of the

scene? What do you think your role within it is? CP Indie r oc k has taken so many for ms and meanings. For a w hile, ther e w a s a s t r o n g s e n s e w i t h i n i n d i e r o c k t h a t y o u ’ r e d o i n g i t y o u r s e l f, y o u ’ r e independent, and that you’re free of the major label “cor r uption”; and t h a t , I w o u l d s a y, e x i s t e d m o r e i n t h e 8 0 s a n d 9 0 s . Yo u k n o w l i k e , “ W e ’ r e i n d e p e n d e n t a n d f u c k a l l t h i s , l a b e l ’ s m o n e y a n d a l l t h i s s t u f f. ” B u t n o w, it’s so easy to be independent because you have blog culture, Inter net, Myspace, Facebook, and you have all these things that can help you exist without cor por ate dollar s.

I t ’ s d i f f e r e n t t o b e i n d i e r o c k n o w t h a n i t w a s 1 0 ye a r s a go. We l l , t h i s b a n d [ V H S o r B e t a ] h a s b e e n a r o u n d fo r ov e r 1 0 ye a r s. We d i d ever ything our selves, down to packaging to transfer ring the master s to final ver sions, to booking our own shows and taking out per sonal loans from banks or begging our parents just so that we could buy a van so that we could tour and do all those things. Now that we have a l a b e l , I d o n’ t k n o w w h a t p a r t w e h a v e i n i n d i e r o c k . I f e e l l i k e , t h o u g h , t h e r e w a s a p a r t o f t h e i n d i e r o c k s c e n e t h a t w e d i d n’ t w a n t t o b e a p a r t o f. I t h i n k t h e 9 0 s h a d a s t a l e n e s s i n t h e i n d i e r o c k s c e n e , a t l e a s t w h e r e I w a s. A l o t o f i t f e l t d a r k a n d j u s t t h a t p e o p l e w e r e n’ t having as much fun anymore.

WH B u t t h a t w a s k i n d o f t h e z e i t ge i s t o f t h e 9 0 s, w o u l d n’ t yo u

say? C P Ye a h , m a y b e t h e r e w a s a n a t i o n a l c l o u d t h a t w a s j u s t l o w e r i n g over the audiences of indie rock, and we kind of wanted to go in a different direction. At that point we had really fallen in love with house music, r aves, but maybe not r ave culture per se, but like going somewhere like a big fucking place with a bunch of different rooms, all these different types of music, and all these different l o o k i n g p e o p l e . I t w a s n’ t fo r u s s o m u c h a b o u t t h e d r u g c u l t u r e a s much as it was that our ears were hearing things that we had never heard before. That was exciting and people were inviting us to be a par t of that in a way that indie rock never really felt. Indie rock rea l l y, i n a w a y, f e l t e x c l u s i v e . I w a s g o i n g t o t h o s e p a r t i e s a n d t h o s e nights felt really inclusive. I think the band somehow went kind of a n t i - r o c k f o r a m i n u t e , y o u k n o w, a n t i - w a n t i n g - t o - g o - h a n g - o u t - a t t h e - h i p s t e r - b a r s , o r a n t i - w a n t i n g - t o - b e - a - p a r t - o f o r, - b e i n g - a w a r e of-what-was-on-the-radar s-for-what-was-cool.

kind of indie r oc k, like Fr enc h Kiss, kind of Walkmanish voice, but it’s got t h i n g s o n t h a t n o t a l o t o f b a n d s a r e d o i n g r i g h t n o w. S o i t g e t s p r a i s e d for that. Not whether it’s good or not, but it’s just different enough to a t t a c h t h e m s e l v e s t o . T h e r e a r e s o n g s t h a t I e n j o y, b u t I d o n ’ t t h i n k t h e whole record deser ves that much attention. WH S o n e w n e s s i s n’ t n e c e s s a r i ly go o d . C P I t d o e s n ’ t m e a n t h a t t h e p r o d u c t i s b e t t e r.

I think there’s a black t-shir t somewhere at a thrift store that I will love just as much as any o t h e r t - s h i r t s t h a t I o w n . I d o n ’ t n e e d t h e n e w c o l o r. A n d i f i t f i t s r i g h t a n d f e e l s r i g h t , j u s t b e c a u s e I h a v e 8 m i l l i o n bl a c k t - s h i r t s, d o e s n’ t m e a n that there is not another black t-shir t out there with my name on it, just perfect. And there are records out there I know are pop records. I know that they’ ve been done that way a million times, but I like it, then I like it. I d o n’ t n e e d t h e f i l t e r o f w h a t ’ s go i n g o n w i t h m u s i c , w h e t h e r i t i s s t a m p e d w i t h a p p r o v a l b y [ P i t c h f o r k ] o r w h o e v e r.

WH One last question, you guys have played with Melt Banana, have you

I ’ m n o t a n t i - r o c k a t a l l . Yo u c a n l i s t e n t o o u r r e c o r d a n d k n o w t h a t . But I definitely feel like I’m at the point where I’m not as concer ned a b o u t i n d i e r o c k a n d c o o l n e s s . T h e r e ’ r e a l o t o f b a n d s c o m i n g u p, n o t t h a t I d o n’ t l i k e t h e m o r w o u l d l i k e t h e m . I f e e l l i k e I u s e d t o f i n d o u t a b o u t m u s i c i n s u c h a d i f f e r e n t w a y t h a n I d o n o w. N o w a days it seems like if I want to find out about something, there’s going to be a flood of people telling me about it because they read about it on a blog. Not that that’s bad, but things ar e differ ent. I think we’re at a weird time in music where we feel like it’s hard f o r a n y o n e t o i n v e n t a n y t h i n g n e w. F o r m e , i t ’ s l i k e , i s t h e p r o d u c t good? Is it different enough to call it good? I feel like a lot of the Pitchfor k-y like places really latch themselves onto bands based on t h e q u e s t i o n o f : n o t i s i t g o o d - b u t i s i t n e w, o r d o e s i t f e e l n e w t o l i s t e n t o ? L i k e Va m p i r e W e e k e n d , i t ’ s k i n d o f A f r o P o p i n f l u e n c e d ,

guys toured Asia? CP We j u s t go t b a c k f r o m J a k a r t a , I n d o n e s i a . I t w a s g r e a t . I t w a s a w e s o m e . We h a v e p l a n s. We ’ r e g i g g i n g i n B a n g k o k . We ’ r e h o p e f u l ly d o i n g some things in par ts of China and maybe South Korea, which is where I’m f r o m , s o i t w o u l d b e a b i g d e a l fo r m e b e c a u s e I h a v e n’ t b e e n b a c k t h e r e s i n c e I w a s a d o p t e d . We c o m p l e t e ly w a n t t o a p a r t o f a m u s i c s c e n e t h a t ex i s t s. We ’ v e d o n e J a p a n . I w o u l d l ov e t o go b a c k . I w i l l p l ay a ny w h e r e . But it would be special for me to at least be a par t of something in Asia, because I’ ve always lived in the States, and it would be nice to spend time over there. And if music is the way I can do that, then that’s awesome.

C o n t r i bu t o r ’ s n o t e : We n dy H s u r e s e a r c h e s, t e a c h e s a n d w r i t e s a b o u t c o n t e m p o r a r y popular music with a focus on US-Asian social landscape. She also blogs and rants a t w w w. Ye l l o w B u z z . o r g .

y of a histor

by J a m es M en efee Fun Size star ted mor e or less in 1991, in Ric hmond, Vir ginia. Allen and I had been friends since I w as four, and he had come bac k fr om a four-year stint in Wisconsin with a skate boar d and a Descendents ta pe. KC (aka Brian) came ar ound w hen Allen and I built a half pipe in my bac k yar d, and said he had a guitar. When we fir st got to gether we played w hat any ear lyteena ge suburban kids would play on Sunday after noons in their par ents’ g ar a ges, namely “House of the Rising Sun” and “Wild T hing”. I s witc hed fr om keyboar d to bass, because we didn’ t have a bass player, and once we lear ned how to tune our instr uments we star ted writing our own stuf f. We had a singer for a bit and played under the name Gr een Room, but c hanged it to Fun Size because Gr een Room sounded too muc h like Gr een Day (w ho w as one of our f avorite bands, of cour se). We r ecor ded our fir st demo Gob bshlopper in 1993 and star ted playing (side note: my friend Jonathan still tells me that this fir st demo w as our best stuf f. I don’ t know if that’s a good thing or not…). Enter Orice Collins: Orice w as a friend of our s w ho star ted hanging ar ound our pr actices, and w ho didn’ t e ven have a musical instr ument (he would just put a c ymbal on his head and yell “Welcome to Samur ai T heatr e!!!” befor e bashing his br ains out…of cour se we thought he w as a genius). Being one of those

guys w ho can pic k up anything and master it quic kly, Orice star ted gi ving us four-tr ac k r ecor dings of songs he w as writing. When we hear d w hat tur ned into “Abacus” we wer e blown aw ay. I wr ote lyrics to it, and Orice joined the band. We r eleased our fir st 7” in 1996 called Bingo King and went on our fir st tour that summer. We also r eleased our fir st CD, Pop Secr et , in 1996, on our friend and mentor Dave Triano’s la bel Bob Recor ds. We went on tour a g ain that winter with our buddies Discount, and then a g ain in spring 1997 with Alge br a 1. By then, I had gi ven Ro ger fr om Less T han Jake a ta pe of Pop Secr et and he passed it on to their dr ummer, Vinnie, w ho w as thinking a bout star ting a la bel. He phoned me and said he dug it and said his la bel w as going to be called Fueled By R amen, and he asked us to r elease a 7”. We called it T he Pr ocess of Selling Out , a play on the Blac k Fla g r ecor d T he Pr ocess of Weeding Out, and also poking fun at Less T han Jake for r ecently signing to Ca pitol after Vinnie told me a bout all the undeser ved f lac k the band w as getting for signing to a major. In the winter of 1997/98 we went on tour with Ben Grim, friends of Allen’s fr om Wisconsin w ho ended up being some of our best friends and musical allies. Man that tour w as fun. At this point we wer e spending a lot of time playing shows up and down the East Coast on the weekends since most of us wer e at sc hool and booking tour s for the winter and summer br eaks. We had ne ver made it out to the West Coast, and wer e tr ying to figur e out how to do that, w hen the Par asites asked us to be suppor t for their full U.S. summer tour in 1998. Fueled By R amen had decided to do a full-length with us, and we went

into the original Big Blue Meanie studio in Hac kensac k, Ne w Jer sey with Jer r y Jones fr om one of our f avorite bands, T he Fiendz, as pr oducer. At this point we had accomplished w ay mor e than we e ver thought possible as a band, and as things star ted getting complicated we star ed drifting a par t. Myself, Orice, KC (Brian) and Allen wer e 19, 20, 21 and 22 r especti vely, and decided it w as time to move on. We played our f ar e well gig at Twister s, our home base, on December 10, 1998, and it w as an amazing show. I will ne ver for get how pac ked it w as, seeing all my friends in the audience, and looking over at Brian and smiling, thinking how gr eat it w as to spend my teena ge year s in a pop/punk band with my best friends. T hat w as the par t a bout Fun Size that matter ed most: being in a band with your best friends…and gr owing up to gether, listening to and playing punk r oc k, touring in your mom’s conver sion v an, and writing songs a bout soda and gir ls. Fun Size will play a r eunion show on Friday, May 30th, along with Neighborhood Friendly, Love and Re verie, and Us and Chuc k (Knuc kle Hed member s doing Knuc kle Hed songs). $8 in adv ance, $10 at the door. Door s at 6pm. Tic kets on sale now at Plan 9 and www.alleykatzr v a.com. Chec k out an exc lusi ve inter vie w with James Menefee on RVAMa g.com. Alley K atz is located at 10 Walnut Alley in the Historic Shoc koe Bottom District in Ric hmond, Vir ginia. Mor e specifically, you can find us between 17th and 18th Str eet of f of Main Str eet. Just look for the wide cob blestone alley near the 17th Str eet Far mer s Mar ket pavilion. For mor e info go to www.myspace.com/funsizer v a

k than f or god

mental illness

punleps to

dis By Lan

Wine

The most pointedly depressing moment in my histor y with music occur red during my freshman year of college at MacRock in Har risonburg, Virginia. I was killing time in the hallways of their event center when I overheard a promoter and manager discussing the cur rent state of the n i g h t ’ s h e a d l i n e r, W e s l e y W i l l i s , w h o w a s c u r r e n t l y a t t h e h o s p i t a l u n d e r g o i n g t r e a t m e n t f o r h i s r e c e n t l y d i a g n o s e d c a n c e r. F o r t h o s e o f y o u not familiar with Willis, he was an enter tainer out of Chicago who was essentially homeless befor e having his talent nur tur ed by none other t h a n J e l l o B i a f r a a n d h i s A l t e r n a t i v e Te n t a c l e s l a b e l . A f t e r q u i t e a f e w f r a n t i c p h o n e c a l l s, i t w a s m a d e c l e a r t h a t We s l ey w a s n o t , u n d e r a ny circumstances, going to miss the perfor mance that night, and would p e r f o r m f r o m a w h e e l c h a i r i f n e c e s s a r y. N o w, a f t e r d e a l i n g w i t h b a n d s f o r a n y p e r i o d o f t i m e , y o u c o m e t o u n d e r s t a n d t h a t n e a r l y a n y t h i n g c a n c a u s e t h e c a n c e l l a t i o n o f a s h o w. A d e a t h i n t h e f a m i l y, a s o r e t h r o a t , a b a d b a g o f w e e d , b a d v i b e s , e t c . can r uin months of planning and promotion, yet here was a 350 pound schizophrenic man with what would turn out to be terminal cancer rolling onstage to perfor m to a group of rowdy hipster s and punks, simply out of obligation to his fans. Three songs in, various kids in the audience began heckling and yelling “fat retard” at the obviously ill man onstage. It was at this point that I decided that I would either have to walk out immediately or trample their perfectly aligned teeth with my heels. Ever since then, I have had an exceptionally low tolerance that border s on physical disgust for the abusive nature with which seemingly competent fans treat perfor mer s with mental illness. The past sever al year s have seen a smattering of documentaries about perfor mer s such as Willis (who has his own to boot), with the likes of Roky Erikson of the 13th Floor Elev ator s, Daniel Johnston, Anton Ne wcomb from T he Brian Jonestown Massacre, having their myths carefully teased and Ima ge by Br a nd on Pe c k

presented to an audience that is begging for the spectacle of selfdestr uction (and destr uction by proxy of their illness). All of these a r t i s t s , s a v e W i l l i s , w h o h a s s i n c e p a s s e d a w a y, a r e s t i l l p e r f o r m i n g t o s o m e e x t e n t , a n d t h o u g h t h e i r d e g r e e s o f i l l n e s s v a r y g r e a t l y, t h e y car r y the common denominator of having their music being a footnote their maladies. I f yo u d o n’ t b e l i e v e m e , t r y go i n g t h r o u g h a ny n u m b e r o f a r t i c l e s a b o u t Daniel Johnston, who has released a for midable body of wor k that could trounce any number of songwriter s, and has been covered and r e-wor ked by too many ar tists to mention. Look at exactly how much print is dedicated to his music and craft. The meat of these ar ticles gener ally consists of grotesque descriptions of his physical and a brief history of the most devastating moments of his life complete with a laundr y list of physical and mental ailments. This, of cour se, is what is deemed acceptable when writer s are tr ying to frame the ar tist suffering for his wor k and producing despite a myriad of odds, but the moment that the music becomes secondary or ter tiary to the spectacle of the ar tist, it becomes simple exploitation. This is the point at which people who often consider themselves above such things consider it justifiable and er udite to amass collections of things based upon the monstrosity of the ar tist. I’m sure that every reader out there has had at least one experience with a friend who has pr efaced a song by saying, “T his guy is totally fucked up…” followed by a wild anecdote that completely engulfs any possible impression of the song before the fir st note is sounded. This is entirely separated from the self-destr uction that is one of the tenants of rock music, but I always find it curious how easily people can slip from one definition to another without batting an eye. In rock & roll, the acid bur nout is forever the equivalent t o s c h i z o p h r e n i a a n d b i - p o l a r d i s o r d e r. S u f f e r i n g w i l l a l w a y s r e m a i n a vir tue in ar t, but it’s cer tainly not a fir e that needs to be fed by the disgust and ignor ance of the fans. 39

Murder By Death Red of Tooth and Claw Vagrant Records Murder By Death has a history of changing their sound, be it slight or extreme, from record to record. Beginning with a sound much akin to Cursive (and often compared to), by the time they had released their third album, In Boca Al Lupa , their sound had changed so much, it was difficult to recognize them as the same band. Trading in their disjointed, 42

awkwardly timed indie rock tunes for Johnny Cashesque down tempo ballads and sea shanties, Murder by Death had reinvented themselves. This time around, the formula hasn’t changed all that much. Still intact are the pirate tunes and low rumbling vocals, but this time with more ferocity than ever. These songs all tell stories of the old days, drinking and sailing, love and loss, crime and punishment. It’s a beautiful

record, swelling with intensity at all the right moments, calming and soothing at others, and is a testament to the fact that this band will continue to change but never disappoint. - Brandon Peck

Vivian Girls S/T Mauled By Tigers Vivian Girls are a trio of girls from Brooklyn that are going to be one of your favorite bands. The band’s

sound is an authentic incorporation of elements of 60s garage surf and modern day punk, and it doesn’t sound cheesy. The most impressive aspect of this record is the vocals. The girls do a lot of harmonizing, and it has a natural sound to it (if you get a chance to see them the vocals sound just as good live). Think the Sonic Youth track “Little Trouble Girl” that has Kim Gordon and Kim Deal doing vocals together; imagine a whole record sounding that cool.

The songs feel laid back, kind of shoegazey, but the bass and drums hold it down keeping the record energetic. With so much stupid shit coming out these days it is comfor ting to know that there are still good bands like the Vivian Girls dropping killer records like this one. - Cur tis Grimstead

The Black Angels Directions to See a Ghost Light in the Attic

I could make this brief: buy this record immediately, and I’ll explain why. You see, Austin’s psych-rockers extraordinaire, the Black Angels, have made what I’d be willing to call album of the year, thus far. I’d been dying to hear this album since, well, the release of their exceptional debut, Passover . As good as that album was, Directions to See a Ghos t blows it out of the water. It’s mindbendingly good; the drone is hypnotic, and the whole

Bands in R ED ar e lo cal

thing is an explosion of a dizzying wall of noise straight out of 1968. Or it is 2068? They don’t seem to belong here, this is a band born both out of the past and the future. Opening track “You on the Run” is awash with the heady guitars and ghostly tambourine that hallmarks the Black Angels sound. As with many of their tracks, the content is pretty politically charged. “Mission District” wouldn’t be out of place on Passover , molasses-like

at the star t and crackling with distor tion. Standout track “18 Years” has one of the sexiest bass lines I’ve ever heard. The song is off the char ts. Alex Maas’ passionate indifference is perfect for lines like “she’s got control of you and you love it”, and “she’s got control of you and you need it”. It’s life in slow motion; the consummate song to cast burning glances at the object of your affection across a smoky bar. There’s an undercurrent of Native American sounds in the

Black Angels’ music, and you’ll hear it all over the place. On “Vikings”, it’s present in the hauntingly tribal backbeat, the perfect foil to Maas’ tinny voice as he sings about German warplanes and bombs. “You in Color” sounds at times like Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, and while both bands share an affinity for the Velvet Underground, the similarity is temporary. This, and much of the album, is the sound of Dennis Hopper and Peter

Fonda driving through the deser t in their drugfueled daze. It’s heat waves and coiled snakes and peyote and bones and all things dry and burning and otherworldly. It’s that moment on a plane when you hit that first patch of turbulence and your stomach drops out from under you. It’s pure, classic, hot damn rock and roll. Whether it’s the dawning of the Age of Aquarius one more time, or a point in history so advanced it doesn’t yet exist, the Black

Angels are there. They’re really fucking good, and they’re only getting better. So, in closing, buy this record immediately. - Megan Petty

Pete & the Pirates Little Death Stolen As the temperature heats up, so too does the libido. As summer approaches, if you’re anything like Reading, England’s, Pete & the Pirates, you’re probably

feeling a little frisky these days. Little Death marks the Pirates’ first foray into fulllengths, and they’re making quite a splash with their sexed-up and more than a little poppy jingling and jangling. Even the album title plays homage to the big “O”. Watch out, ladies, they’re (possibly) single and (definitely) ready to mingle. Right away, you’re made aware that there’s a par ty in the Pirates’ pants that you’re invited to. Sure, 43

they’re a little superficial (“your smile is fake/but I like your face), and a tad selfish (“I messed up your bed/I mixed up your head”), but they’re pretty likeable all the same. Taking cues from the Buzzcocks and early Supergrass, Pete & the Pirates embark on a baker’s dozen tracks that intoxicate and captivate. The entire album is ridiculously listenable, and falls under the category of inescapably catchy.

is an ode to an unattainable lover, showing off the cheeky harmonies that run rampant on the record (along with all those raging hormones). On “Lost in the Woods” the Pirates get a little metaphorical (“it feels so good/when I’m lost in the woods”). You know they’re not talking about their neighborhood park. The guitars are as wicked as the lyrics, adding to the undeniable charm of these saucy lads. The sexy talk doesn’t stop there; on “She Doesn’t Belong to Me” “Moving” we’re serenaded 44

with “knocking boots/and we’ll make the car horn toot/and the neighbors stop and stare”. The big single from the album, “Knots”, is dizzyingly frenetic, the taut guitar and rapid-fire drumming reminiscent of the halcyon Britpop days gone by. Lest you think it’s all casual sex ‘round these par ts, well, you’re almost correct. But the Pirates do a lovely little balladesque number in “Eyes Like Tar” that show a somewhat deeper range of emotion than you might

have expected. Only just. Sure, they’re not breaking any new ground, these Pirates, but sometimes making a record like this is good enough. These Pirates can pillage my house any day. - Megan Petty

The Breeders Mountain Battles 4AD This is a good album. I want to star t with that, because nothing else I write should detract from the fact

that this is a good album. The problems arise when The Breeders put out two amazing, nearly perfect albums, nine years apar t, and then take six years to drop this. It’s a little disappointing.

Last Splash is, among other things, a road-trip essential due to its beginning-to-end excellence. Title TK excels in the same way, but with a totally different feel. There is not a song on either record over which you want to skip.

The first two tracks of Mountain Battles will reassure you that Kim Deal hasn’t spent the past six years writing lyrics. And I agree that one of the most winning attributes of The Breeders has been their ability to write freakishly great songs while obviously lacking in technical proficiency, but the guitar solo on “It’s The Love” does not sound like sloppy pop brilliance, or even a loving tribute to the songs original authors. It sounds like a 12-year-old who’s

been playing guitar for a week showing off to his parents. There are places on this album where the not-trying-too-hard sounds a lot like they’re trying too hard. There are, however, several songs on here that are good and sound like The Breeders that we know. I would actually say that the majority of these songs sound like familiar Breeders. But I think that’s why I’m bored with them. This album doesn’t sound

like it’s own entity. Songs like “Istanbul” and “German Studies” stand out as interesting, and “Regalame Esta Noche” can’t help but sound different with the Spanish lyrics and a guest guitarist. Fans of The Breeder’s first album, Pod , will probably like this album a lot more. But I have been let down. It’s still good. It’s just not as good as I hoped it would be. - Nathan Joyce

Now Sleepyhead Nocturne Pop Faction / Exotic Fever

as it had been so long since I’d heard their music and wasn’t quite sure that I was the man for the job I was being asked to do.

It has been nearly four years since Now Sleepyhead formed as a two piece between Michael Otley and Karen Creighton, which was the first and last time I saw them. Since then, they have added two other versatile musicians, Phil Barbato and Oura Sananikone. I had my misgivings about reviewing their new album, Nocturne ,

As it turns out, Now Sleepyhead has created a beautiful album full of lush sounds that ebb and flow from beautiful acoustic melodies to screaming guitars and orchestral crescendos. The way that Otley and Creighton’s voices play off of each other is perfect in most instances and easily brings to mind

the likes of Carissa’s Weird and Stars at separate times. In the song “Who the Fuck”, the song is capped off by a chorus of voices that it would be difficult to define as anything other than breathtaking. From the most modest and simple track, to the loudest and most complex, the album never misses a beat, and by the time it is over, if you are anything like me, you might be asking yourself where you’ve been for last four years. Bravo,

Now Sleepyhead, bravo. - Brandon Peck

The Kills Midnight Boom Domino Records In the past, it’s been easy to dismiss The Kills’ music as pretentious hipster music, especially if you were a fan of Alison Mosshar t’s previous band, the pop punk Floridians Discount. At the same time, it was hard to ignore the fact that the music being created between 45

her and counterpar t, Jamie Hince, was pretty goddamn innovative. Combining dance grooves with the likes of grunge rock and 70s era British mod rock, it was only a matter of time before they would release their magnum opus. Three albums and numerous singles later, this London based duo has released what may be one of the best pop records to come out this year. Staying true to their lo-fi approach to recording, these two have managed 46

to release an album that simultaneously sounds dir ty and beautifully produced. From the disjointed opening track “U.R.A. Fever” (whose music sounds to be created by a bass guitar, a dial tone and an electric drill) to pure indie rock gems like “Tape Song” and “Last Day of Magic” to the more quiet numbers like “Black Balloon” or the closing track “Goodnight Bad Morning”, this album is a testament to the pursuit of creativity in pop music. One of the most impressive

things about this album is that it can easily be listened to passively, but when you pay close attention to it, you will begin to discover little nuances in the songs that didn’t appear upon earlier listens. If this is just the beginning of things to come, I hope the end never arrives. - Brandon Peck

Dead Goats Tennessee People Self-Released The first time I heard the Dead Goats was during their

sound check at Hyperlink Café. I set up a show for my band at the time, Fuck if I Know. I asked my friends, Kemper Blair and Stuar t Holt, if they were up to anything new musically since the disbanding of their old group, the Rabbits. They made claims of having two projects, Rhinoceros and Cubscout (which would later be renamed to the Dead Goats). Cubscout would also feature ex-members of the band, KeyOns. Not knowing what to expect,

except the simple definition of their sound as “sloppy guitar rock”, I went in with no expectations. I was floored instantly by the infectious simple chorus of “Stayin’ Up All Night”.

staples, punk sensibilities, and modern rock ar tists such as Against Me!, they have developed a familiar, yet distinct sound that demands the listener to pay attention.

Since then, I have been a diehard fan and on occasion, the sixth goat. For their first release Tennessee People , they have compiled eight demos of whiskey-soaked, cocaine-whiffed, heavy rock anthems. Taking their cues from classic rock

There are many standout points to this release. One that comes to mind is the incredible vocal dynamic shared by Blair and tambourine player Chris Ramming. Throwing in as many “whoa” par ts as possible, they provide the perfect setting for the

best sing-alongs. The best example of this being in their song, “Cemetery”. Besides having fantastic sing-along par ts, they dabble with topics like the par ty lifestyle (“Stayin’ Up All Night”), holding out for the best dreams to come true (“Yer Ma and Pa”), and just being a rock band in general (“What Don’t You Go” and “Oh Yeah”). The subject matters don’t demand too much interpretation, but they do offer a universal appeal to

audiences of all kinds. The music, which may be sloppy at times, is engaging and full of high energy. The combined forces of guitarists David Rohrer and Jason Detzel help build foundations of ridiculous guitar solos and clever chord progressions that are as familiar as they are unforgettable. The only downside to this release is that their new songs are even better. They find

themselves incorporating more ambitious ideas into the fold, as well as adding Ramming’s input as songwriter and third guitarist. What the future holds for the Dead Goats is exciting to say the least. If there were one band not to be missed in Richmond, it would be this band. The Dead Goats continue slaying nightly. -Shannon Cleary

Wheelbite Discography 19982003 Flatspot Records It’s hard to believe that in ten years since the demo was recorded, Paul has grown the most fantastic beard. Anyway, while most of Wheelbite’s contemporaries were aping the posi-core revival of the late nineties, or fist fighting kids outside of Twisters because they were from Virginia Beach, Wheelbite

was more concerned with talking shit, making jokes, throwing dar ts, listening to Infest and Breakdown, and watching The State . Listening to the CD now I can understand how we were overshadowed by bands like Witness and Time Flies. We didn’t have the hear t, or the right moves, and I was really drunk. Completely oblivious to “scene unity” and overwhelmed with the number of our friends who had been stabbed in the back, Wheelbite instead focused our attention on

three things: Skate, Punk, Fuck. 21 songs and each one a milestone in musicianship and lyric writing. A legendary piece of Richmond hardcore/ punk history that rivals the Fun Size reunion. - Adam Juresko

im a ge Ad a m Jur e s k o

The Sanest People On Earth By T yl e r B a s s Believe what you want. No, seriously, in the words of Lafayette Ronald Hubbard, “If it’s not true for you, it’s not true.” The rest of this ar ticle is a mere caveat. By 11 a.m. on April 12, a variety of sunglasses-wearing characters had showed up, only nine in number perhaps, but persistent nonetheless. Their handheld signs disparaged the tax-exempt status of the Church of Scientology for various reasons, including its use of private investigators and what some have considered to be practices physiologically predatory in the pur view of mainstream culture. Famously, as the result of a landmark South Park episode, the church has been the subject of all manner of ridicule, par ticularly for its myths about the origins of human strife. In the words of Hubbard in the Operating Thetan level three technical bulletin:

“The head of the Galactic Confederation (76 planets around larger stars visible from here) (founded 95,000,000 yrs ago, very space opera) solved overpopulation (250 billion or so per planet - 178 billion on average) by mass implanting. He caused people to be brought to Teegeeack (Ear th) and put an H Bomb on the principal volcanoes (Incident 2) and then the Pacific area ones were taken in boxes to Hawaii and the Atlantic area ones to Las Palmas and there ‘packaged’. His name was Xenu. He used renegades. Various misleading data by mean of circuits, etc. was placed in the implants. When through with his crime, Loyal Officers (to the people) captured him after 6 years of battle and put him in an electronic mountain trap where he still is. ‘They’ are gone. The place (Confed.) has since been a deser t.” Last month was RVA’s first official inter view with church officials, and the whole rendezvous answered few questions and provoked insulting lies on behalf of both par ties. Sophia Alvarez is not the real name of the woman who accompanied me into this inter view.

Carol Down thr ough hist o r y, m a n ha s b e e n t r y i ng t o s o lv e his p r o ble m s. He’s done all sor ts of thing s. And m a ny m e n, inc lud ing [ Ar is t o t le ] , ha v e fo un d pieces to the puzzle. It’s no t unt il M r. H ub b a r d d id t he r e s e a r c h a nd fo un d Dianetics did he find all the p ie c e s a nd a lig n e d t he m . T he o nly w ay yo u k no w that’s tr ue is w hen you r ea d it b e c a us e it ’ s b a s e d o n t he p hy s ic a l la w s o f t h e uni ver se. It’s not mystical. I t ’ s no t p o s it i v e t hink ing. I t ’ s no t a ny t hing t ha t ’ s myste r ious. It’s based on p hy s ic a l la w s. So w he n a p p lie d t o a h um a n b e ing, it wor ks unifor mly only if they ha v e ha d d r ug s. W he n yo u w e r e in t o t he r a py, d id you hav e dr ugs? Sophia Alvarez:

No.

Carol Good. Absolutely go o d fo r yo u , o r s o m e k ind o f e v a s i v e t r e a t m e nt tha t psyc hiatrists do – lobo t o m ie s a nd s ho c k t r e a t m e nt s, o r t hi ng s o f t ha t natur e, is the time that Dia ne t ic s w ill no t w o r k fo r yo u b e c a us e t hey ha v e d e str oyed the par ts of the m ind t o t r a c k w ha t ha s o c c ur r e d t o it .

We ll, I d e f init e ly us e d a w id e v a r ie t y o f p ha r m a ceutical a gents of fer ed by p s yc hia t r y my s e l f, w he n I w a s a c hil d . A w ho le coc kta il.

Tyler Stephen Bass:

Carol

What w as the r eason?

Uhm , I suppose the int e nt w a s t o t r e a t d e p r e s s io n, t o s ay no t hing o f Scie nto lo g y, but I wouldn’ t s ay t ha t t hey w o r k e d , t he d r ug s. I w a s a ls o g i v e n Ad e r a ll, a bout psyc holo g y, a nd I t hink t hey a r e w e ll a d v is e d . Oh, a ls o Pa x il, e spe cia lly that one.

c a l e s t a blis hm e nt t ha t a c t ua lly m a r k e t s a nt i- d e p r e s s a nt s on t ele vis ion. I f t ho s e m e d ic a t io ns w e r e s o e s s e nt ia l, t he n w hy w o uld t hey need to make glitz a d v e r t is e m e nt s ? Fo r a n in t e r e s t ing p o int o f c o m p a r is o n, ima gine if gr ocer y s t o r e s s t a r t e d t o r un a d v e r t is e m e nt s fo r f r uit s : “ C o m e d o w n t o K r o ger and t r y b a na na s, by D o le . Po t a s s ium : inv a lua ble t o b r a in f unc t io n! ” C a r o l c o m m unic a t e d he r f r us t r a t io n w it h ho w s he p e r c e i v e d ps yc hiat ris t s con f us in g m a t t e r w it h t he m ind . “ T he b r a in, ” s he s a id , “ is like your left le g. It ha s no m o r e t o d o w it h t he s o ur c e o f yo ur p r o ble m s, t ha n i f you had a br oken le g. ” J a ne t Re it m a n a t Rolling Stone w r o t e a n ex c e lle nt a r t ic le two year s a go in w hic h s he a c t ua l ly go t a n a ns w e r a b o ut Xe nu f r o m Sc ie ntolo g y. Fr om that is s ue :

”[Sea Or g member, Mike] Rinder has fielded questions on Scientolo g y’s beliefs for year s. When I ask him w hether ther e is any v alidity to the Xenu stor y, he gets r ed-f aced, almost going into a tir ade. ‘It is not a stor y, it is an auditing le vel,’ he says, neither confir ming nor denying that this theolo g y exists.” H o w e v e r, a p p a r e nt ly t he c hur c h is no t w illing t o k e e p i t s stor y str aight on t his p o in t .

TSB:

Carol

I w a s r e a d ing a n a r t ic le . S c i e nt o lo g y a l lo w e d a P R per son to inter act w it h a r e p o r t e r f r o m Rolling Stone la s t ye a r (m e m o r y w a s not pr ecis ely s er ving ) . T hey inv it e d him t o o ne o f t he ir c e nt e r s in C a lifo r nia, and he asked Sc ie nt o lo g y w ha t w a s u p w it h t he Xe nu s t o r y.

TSB:

All of them , sir. All o f t he m . Carol

I do ha ve to c onc ede to Sc ie nt o lo g y s o m e r ig ht f ul d is d a in fo r a pha r m a c e ut i 52

W ha - W ha t ?

Her e, Car ol’s eyes nar r ow e d in w ha t w a s a ha l f w ay ho no r a ble bu t f a t uo u s a tte mpt, nonetheless, to deny ha v ing he a r d o f t he na m e o f t he fo r m e r int e rg a la ctic r uler plaster ed c ount le s s t im e s o n t he p a ge s a nd blo g s of ne w s m o n keys, par ticular ly thr ougho ut t ha t m o nt h a nd t he p r e v io u s Fe b r ua r y, w he n a n Inter net-based gr oup called “Ano ny m o us ” o r c he s t r a t e d p r o t e s t s t o inc r e a s e Xenu aw ar eness. By this junctur e in the inte r v ie w, I k ne w t ha t a l l fo r t hr i g ht ne s s w a s a b o u t t o shatter into a thousand pie c e s o n b o t h s id e s, t h a t is a p a r t f r o m t he f a c t t ha t I had gi ven phony names fo r my s e lf a nd Alv a r e z o n t he w ay i n. T ha t blip f r o m Me l Br o ok’s film Robin Hood: Men In Tights w he r e a ll o f Ro b in H o o d ’ s m e n ar e simultaneously “bullshit ” - c o ug hing, p laye d o n lo o p a s C a r o l b e g a n a c a t and mouse g ame for the r es t o f t he int e r v ie w w he r e s he lie d , k ne w I k ne w s he w as lying, yet tried to gi ve m e a n a ns w e r w it ho ut g i v ing m e a n a ns w e r. T ha n k yo u fo r that last par t, Car o l. TSB:

o f a q u o t e t ha t s h o uld in a ll r ig ht ne s s s e r v e a s a n e t e r nal landmar k to the ble a c h- s t r o ng b r a nd o f c o g nit i v e d is s o na nc e a v a ila ble t o all ins ide t he w alls o f M a nha t t a n’ s Sc ie nt o lo g y c hur c h. Carol I a m go ing t o t e ll yo u, a ny b o dy w ho w o uld r e v e a l – or, r e veal is t he w r o ng w o r d – s ay things s uc h a s t ha t , it ’ s k ind o f lik e , my tr ying to verbally ex p la in w ha t L R H w a s t a k ing s o m e fo ur o r f i v e hund r e d pa ges to deli ver to yo u p e o p le . I t w o uld b e lik e my t r y ing t o ex p la in it t o you. T her e ar e suc h f a ls e ho o d s. N o ne o f it is t r ue . T he o nly w ay t o k no w w ha t is on this OT3 le vel is by d o i ng it . T he n, he k no w s w ha t ’ s o n t he r e .

So, in a w ay, my q ue s t io n w a s a ns w e r e d , a s s he r e f e r r e d to OT3, w hic h I had no t p r e v io us ly a s s o c ia t e d w it h c hur c h- o r d a ine d k no w le d ge of Xenu (alt hough it c e r t a i nly is ). T he k ind o f v e r b a l r una r o und r e g a r d ing the name of Xenu, ho w e v e r, is b e lo w m o c k e r y a t t his p o int . L . Ro n H ub b a r d had no a bility to p r e d ic t t he e f f e c t t he I nt e r ne t .

T he Xenu stor y. H e r e ’ s w ha t I k no w – it c o uld b e jus t a c o m p le t e fo r ger y, and I could be jus t a fo o l, but , I m e a n, t he p o int is t his – yo u k no w, t he people w ho r eac h t ha t le v e l a r e t o ld no t t o d is c lo s e a ny o f it .

TSB: Carol TSB:

T he per son r e plied tha t it is no t a s t o r y, it is a n a ud it ing le v e l.

Carol TSB:

I don’ t know w hat t ha t is.

Xena?

Xenu. Yeah, this w as a P R p e r s o n fo r Sc ie n t o lo g y. I a m no t m a k ing t h is

up. Carol

Yeah.

A fe w moments later, after s he ex t r a p o la t e d fo r a w hile o n t he na t ur e o f t he Scie ntolo g y ’s or g anized, the r a p e ut ic hie r a r c hy, C a r o l la id d o w n a t r ue ge m

Carol We ll, I w a nt t o s ay s o m e t hing t o yo u. H e r e ’ s t he t r ut h of it : unles s yo u ha v e d o ne t he s e g r a d ie nt le v e ls, a nd I c o uld c o m m unicat e t o you w hat I ha v e go t t e n o ut o f [ t he a ud it ing le v e l] C le a r, it m ig ht no t be r eal to you. So fo r m e t o t e ll yo u w ha t I a m ex p e r ie nc ing t ha t is n’ t r e a l, o r isn’ t r eal for you, but r e a l fo r m e , w o uld b e lik e a d is t o r t io n o f w ha t it is t o be Clear. I can comm unic a t e t o yo u t ha t I ha v e bur s t s o f p e r s o na l f r e e d o m , t hat – I can des cribe it in c e r t a in w ay s in w hic h yo u ha v e s o m e r e a lit y o n it , but if I wer e to tell yo u t ha t I c o nt a c t e d a p a s t lif e – n o w t ha t m ay b e t r ue or t hat may not be t r ue – but w ha t a r e yo u go ing t o t hin k ? ‘ I s s he a n ut ?’ Ever y per son should s e e k it o ut fo r t he m s e lv e s.

At this point, I admitted to ha v ing r e a d OT 3 ’ s t e c hnic a l m a nua l. She a c t e d like she w as completely sur p r is e d , e v e n t ho ug h it is a v a ila ble a t c o unt le s s d e stina tion spots ac r oss the I nt e r ne t ’ s t o r r e nt und e r g r o und . It is d if f ic ult t o d e scr ib e the im m ensity of t he t e m p t a t io n a t t he t im e t o p ull o ut my la p t o p and show her all of the copy r ig ht e d f ile s, but t he s e Sc ie nt o lo g is t s a r e f a m o u s for their copyright law vood o o. I ha d ne it he r t he m e a ns no r t h e w illing ne s s t o deal with the f act that she m ig ht ha v e ha d s o m e r a p p o r t w it h t he p o lic e a t t h e door to deal with r esear c he r s s uc h a s my s e lf. I h e ld o f f ex t r a c t ing a m o ney sho t o f her f ac e w hen she s a w H ub b a r d ’ s o w n ha nd w r it ing s p e lling “ Xe nu” o n this mo nitor in the inter est o f a v o id ing a t a ng le w it h t he C hur c h. Carol You have r ead unt r u t hs. To t a l bulls hit . I t ’ s d is t o r t e d . I t ’ s m e a nt t o make us look like imbecile s b e c a us e o f o ne r e a s o n a lo ne , o ne r e a s o n o nly, and I am going to tell you t his : t he r e a r e fo r c e s o u t t he r e – d r ug s, b ik e r s . . .

–Biker s? T hat is completely ins c r ut a ble . P le a s e , Sla u g ht e r a m a p a r t ic ip a nt s, withhold w hat would have o t he r w i s e b e e n yo ur m e r c ile s s r e t a lia t io n– Carol . . . oil m onger s, t he r e a r e a c o up le o f o t he r s, t he m e d ia , w ho t r y to enslave our society by the ir lie s. T his o r g a ni z a t i o n is t he m o s t e t hic a l, t he most sane, the most suppo r t i v e , ha s t he t o o ls t ha t c a n a llo w p e o p le t o ha v e so me pe r sonal fr eedom . SA:

So many people don’ t go t ha t w ay.

Carol I’m telling you bec a us e , if s o m e b o dy p ut s, he s ay s, c o nf id e nt ia l m a terial fr om upper le vels and p ut s it o n t he I nt e r ne t – f ir s t o f a l l, a ny b o dy w ho would attain this state o f a w a r e s, w o uld n’ t d o it . H e w o uld n’ t d o it . H e just wouldn’ t because he ha s c o m p a s s io n t o r e a c h t he s t a t e w he r e he w o ul d inc lude mankind r ather than ind i v id ua liz e him s e lf.

W hile I a m t o o o f t e n a f a n o f f la t t e r ing my s e lf a s a n inf luent ial member of t he n e w s m e d ia , my a ge nd a t o e ns la v e yo u, t he r e a d e r, ha s not been w or k ing o ut s o w e ll la t e ly. I ha v e b e e n r e s e a r c hin g Sc ie nt o lo g y for year s and have r e g a r d e d O p e r a t ing T he t a n d o c um e n t s f r o m a v a r ie t y o f sour ces. Someone, some body w it hin t he c hur c h ha s no t o nly r e le a s e d t he s e document s, but in a l l s e r io u s lik e liho o d t his ha s ha p p e ne d r e p e a t e d ly. I n t his r espect, Car ol is e i t he r s inc e r e ly d up ing he r s e lf o r ly ing v e r y ha r d . Es s e nt ially, she posits that s o m e o ne w o uld t a k e t he t im e t o fo r ge w ha t a r e t ho us a nd s of pa ges of docu m e nt s. W ha t I le a v e o p e n fo r a ll o f yo u Sc ie nt o lo g y ha t e r s out ther e is this – w o uld C a r o l’ s ins is t e nc e t ha t t he d o c um e nt s I s a w w e r e f ak e on t he bas is o f t ha t “ f a c t ” t ha t n o Sc ie nt o l o g is t w o uld e v e r d is c l o s e t hem pr ovide in the c o u r t t he le g a l f r a m e w o r k t o e nd le s s ly d is t r ibut e Sc ie nt olo g y’s copyrighted int e r na l d o c um e nt s o n t he w o r ld w id e w e b ? I f C a r o l w e r e right, then ther e w o uld b e no ha r m b e c a us e t he d o c um e nt s c o uld no t c o ncei v a bly belong to t he c hur c h. T he int e r v ie w w it h C a r o l ha d num e r o us o t he r b r illia nt m o ment s of mis dir ect io n, p r e v a r ic a t io n a nd a v o id a nc e o n he r p a r t . (O ur ov e r lo r ds and s lave mas t e r s, p s yc hia t r is t s, s o m e t im e s r e f e r t o t his a s “ blo c k ing ”.) T hese inc luded he r d e ny ing ha v ing he a r d o f t he t e r m “ Fr e e z o ne r ” t o d e scribe the c hur c h’s d e b a s e d H ub b a r d it e r e l a t i v e s p r a c t ic ing in t he Ea s t e r n Bloc and Ger many o ut s id e o f t he f ina nc ia l t r ia ng le o f C hur c h P r e s id e nt D a v i d M is cavia ge. Simul t a ne o us ly, s he t r a s he d t he G e r m a n gov e r nm e nt w ho ha s c r iminalized Scient ol o g y a s “ o p p r e s s i v e ” (t hus d r i v ing t he und e r g r o und Fr e e z one movement ). So in a s up r e m e ins t a nc e o f ir o ny, s he ex p r e s s e d r e s e nt m e nt of t he per s ecut or a n d t he p e r s e c ut e d , w ho w he n p r e s s e d s he w o uld a c k no w le dge mer ely as “not p r a c t ic ing Sc ie nt o lo g y. ”

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T ALE S F RO M T O BAC C O A V E N UE

EDO’S GIANT Ima ge by Ant and Christian Detr es

The owner of Italian restaurant Edo’s Squid said the final touches are being put on a sister location that will ser ve similar dishes, only prepared with a much larger por tion of the eater y’s namesake seafood. Edo’s Giant Squid will open on May 25, owner and acclaimed local c h e f, E d Va s a i o, a n n o u n c e d t h i s m o r n i n g. T h e r e s t a u r a n t w i l l b e housed at a for mer w ar ehouse in Jac kson War d lar ge enough to accommodate sea animals that were once considered to be only mythological but have since been documented to reach up to 70 feet long, not including tentacles. Va s a i o, a l s o t h e m a n b e h i n d f a m e d l o c a l I t a l i a n r e s t a u r a n t M a m m a Zu’s and take-out hot-spot 8 1/2, said he’d always planned on establishing a four th eater y in town that was bigger than the other s. “ W h i c h i t i s , a n d r e a l l y, h a s t o b e i n o r d e r t o f i t t h e s e t h i n g s i n s i d e , ” he said, refer ring to what he called “fear some water beasts.” Edo’s Giant Squid plans to offer many of the signature dishes that have made the previous ventures so successful; food that will be slightly more costly but come with the added touch of a creature large enough to do battle with a sper m whale. Appetizers will include the jumbo calamari ($42, a single fried ring roughly the size of an office cubicle) and the Giant Squid with white beans ($68, including three pounds of white beans and arugula), Va s a i o s a i d .

Entrees will also be ser ved family-style, he said, with dishes able to ser ve 500 people comfor tably or groups of five with heavy leftover s. Richmond ar ea r estaur ant critics wer e delighted by the announcement. “Considering what Edo’s Squid and the like have given us in the past, w e ’ r e e x p e c t i n g b i g t h i n g s , ” S t y l e We e k l y w r o t e i n a p r e v i e w, “ a n d w e d o n ’ t j u s t m e a n p l a t e s t h e s i z e o f a n S U V. ” M u c h l i k e t h e ex p e r i e n c e a t a l o b s t e r r e s t a u r a n t , Va s a i o s a i d p a t r o n s at Edo’s Giant Squid would be able to pick their own dinner from an aquarium four city blocks in size, steering a whaling ship to the middle of the tank and using harpoons to catch squid. Va s a i o – w h o t o l d r e p o r t e r s t o “ C a l l m e E d ” – s a i d t h e h u n t fo r t h e g i a n t s q u i d s h o u l d n o t b e v i e w e d l i t e r a l l y a s o n l y s p e a r i n g a d i n n e r, b u t r a t h e r, a m e t a p h o r f o r s o m e t h i n g m o r e d e e p l y p h i l o s o p h i c a l : a vast allegorical study into the univer sal concepts of class and social status, moral values, religion, the epic fight between good and evil and the inevitability of fate.

To b a c c o A v e n u e i s R i c h m o n d , VA’ s m o s t a c c u r a t e s o u r c e o f m i s i n f o r mation. Go to tobaccoave.wordpress.com for more delicious satire and wacky enter tainment.

SQUID SET TO OPEN IN MAY 57

Salvia Divinorum EXPERIMENTS WITH THE DIVINER’S SAGE Researcher s R. Anthony Har ris and Al Har ris Writer Al Har ris Documentar y filmmaker Ben Muri For countless centuries, Mazatec shamans of the Oaxaca region of Mexico have used a rare species of the mint family as a key to opening wide what Aldous Huxley dubbed “the door s of perception.” The plant, Salvia Divinor um, is perhaps the most potent hallucinogenic known to exist in the natural wor ld. Smoking a small amount can induce visionar y states, obliteration of ego, over lapping realities, distor tion of time and space, and encounter s with entities from other dimensions. Until recently, salvia has been legal in most states and easily obtained over the Inter net or at local head shops. Now Virginia has joined the growing list of states with salvia regulations on the books. Beginning July 1, a law passed by the General Assembly and signed by Gover nor Tim K aine will go into effect that makes salvia a Schedule I dr ug, meaning possession or sale of the divine sage will be a crime. Delegate John O’Bannon, R-Henrico, introduced the legislation at the request of “concer ned law enforcement officials.” He believes salvia is a dangerous dr ug and considered the bill one of his health care priorities. “I’m respectful of individual liber ties and the tension between individual liber ties and public good. I think what’s happening is this is becoming a dr ug that can be misused,” O’Bannon said. Salvia’s effects usually last between five to 15 minutes, and produce ver y little to no after effects. O’Bannon, who has never used the dr ug, says the effects are

similar to LSD, but salvia researcher Daniel Seiber t of Malibu, Califor nia says that comparison really isn’t fair. “It’s like saying a Fellini movie is like a Francis Coppola movie, they are both movies, but they are obviously different kinds of movies,” Seiber t said. Seiber t star ted the Salvia Divinor um Research Center as an educational resource for people to find out about the plant. In his opinion, salvia should have some regulations, such as restrictions to minor s, but says an outright ban of salvia is a “crime against nature.” “When used responsibly at appropriate doses, for therapeutic reasons, in the appropriate environment, there is no evidence it is har mful in any way,” Seiber t says. Delaware banned salvia several year s ago after the suicide of teenager Brett Chidester, whose parents claimed the intense experience induced by their son’s salvia use contributed to his death. She said in news repor ts that descriptions of his intense trip found in his diar y, led her to conclude that the dr ug fractured his fragile mental sate. Seiber t says he has witnessed a full range of emotional responses to salvia over the cour se of his 20 year s of research, from ir ritation to relaxation, but never suicidal tendencies. “I would say anyone who has any kind of histor y of mental abnor malities or mental illness should probably not do salvia or any other psychedelic,” Seiber t said. So, is salvia really a dangerous public menace or a har mless plant that offer s a fleeting diver sion from reality? We ask several fir st-time salvia shaman scouts to share their experiences with the so-called “shepherdess” and their opinion on the state’s new law.

01 Joe AGE 24 Effects Feeling of heaviness, sweats, mild laughter, relaxation, war mth, distor ted field of vision, slowed verbal response, separation of ego from physical self, spatial distor tions

How did the actual experience compare with your expectations? “It was kind of a let down in that I had heard a lot of people say crazy things, that they’ ve been on their beds seeing spirits from beyond, and this was not like that.”

“The cor ner s of my vision are all going wawawawawawa, but that’s about it”

Would you try salvia again?

Second dose administered 8:53 after initial dose

“Yeah, possibly. I don’t feel a need to buy some salvia, and that’s what this weekend is going to be.”

“For a minute there, it felt like who I am, or ever ything that makes up me, went back a foot, and I could still see through my eyes but ever ything was ver y removed and it was kind of cur ving around. It continued to feel that way but my field of vision came back.” What was your emotional state during the salvia experience? “Felt ver y clear, clarity of ‘I shouldn’t have done this.’ It wasn’t a feeling of dread or anything, it was like I feel sweaty and I shouldn’t have done this.”

Do you think salvia should be banned, regulated, or left legal? “Left legal. I don’t think that’s something the kids are going to be saying, ‘Let’s go smoke the salvia!’” TOTAL DURATION 16:30 minutes

02 Caitlin Age 20 Effects Laughter, fidgeting, t ing ling s e ns a t io n

How did the actual experience compare with your expectations?

“I felt a little tingly, and my h a nd s w e r e m ov ing, I f e lt f unny, but it w a s n’ t a nything c r azy at all.”

“ I t hink I he a r d m o r e t ha n it a c t ua lly is. ”

Second dose administered 5:00 after initial dose.

Would you try salvia again? “ Ye a h, I t hink s o. ”

“I couldn’ t stop staring a t t he s p o t t he r e , it w a s k ind o f ge t t ing b ig ge r maybe , but I c ouldn’ t tell.”

Do you think salvia should be banned, regulated, or left legal?

What was your emotional state during the salvia experience?

“ I t ’ s go ing t o r e g ula t e it s e lf. I t hink m a k ing it i ll e g a l is not going to stop p e o p le f r o m t r y ing it . ”

“I fe lt good.”

TOTAL DURATION 1 0 : 0 0 m inut e s

03 Tyler Age 25 Effects War m th, distor tio ns o f p hy s ic a l s e lf, la ug ht e r, ext e r na liz e d d ia lo gue , heav y sensation, per c e p t io n o f m ov ing line s, p hy s ic a l ma nif e s t a t io n o f music “I feel like my head is tur n in g s id e w ay s, lik e I f e e l lik e my ja w is c o m ing in r ig ht no w.” Second dose administered 4:00 after initial dose “I w a s looking at this ar ea a lo t , a nd fo r a w hile I c o uld s e e line s o ut lin ing all the dr esser, the we ig ht , t he f a n, a nd it w a s k ind o f m ov ing lik e t his, sid e w ays.” What was your emotional state during the salvia experience? “I felt good for a w hile.”

How did the actual experience compare with your expectations? “ N o t a s c r a z y a s t he s t o r ie s I h e a r d . I ’ v e he a r d p e o p le s ay they time tr aveled a nd s t uf f lik e t ha t . M ay b e t hey jus t s m o k e d m o r e t ha n I d id. ” Would you try salvia again? “ Ye a h, in t he f ut ur e . ” Do you think salvia should be banned, regulated, or left legal? “ I d o nt t hink 1 5 - ye a r- o ld k id s s ho uld b e d o i ng it . T he t hing is now I’m coming d o w n, w it h w e e d yo u a r e hig h fo r lo nge r, w it h t his yo u c o me down so easily. I n t he p r i v a c y o f yo u r o w n h o m e I t hink it w o uld b e t o t a lly cool, I wouldn’ t o p e r a t e a v e hic le o n it . I ’ m no t s ur p r is e d t hey a r e go ing to make it ille g al, t hey d o n’ t w a nt p e o p le t o ha v e f un. ” Total Duration 1 4 : 0 0 m inut e s

04 Laura Age 24 Effects War m th, heav y sens a t io n, b o d ily d is t o r t io ns, int e r na liz a t io n o f s e lf

Would you try salvia again?

“It fe e ls like my feet ar en’ t a t t a c he d , lik e t he r e is a b ig g a p b e t w e e n my f e e t a nd my k nees.”

“ Ye a h, in t he r ig ht s it ua t io n o r s e t t ing, t he n a g a in m ay b e not . Not b e c a us e it ’ s a b a d f e e ling, bu t it ’ s int e ns e . ”

“I feel like I’m mor e in it, I f e e l li k e I ’ m r e a lly ins id e my s e lf, p hy s ic a lly a n d me nta lly.”

Do you think salvia should be banned, regulated, or left legal?

What was your emotional state during the salvia experience?

“ I d o n’ t t h in k it s ho uld b e b a nne d , m ay b e r e g ula t e d lik e e ver yt hing is r e gu la t e d . I c o uld n’ t s e e my s e lf s m o k ing a nd go ing t o w o r k o r s omet hing. ”

“I’m like ‘w hat the fuc k?’”

Total Duration 9 : 0 0 m inut e s

How did the actual experience compare with your expectations? “I do n’ t know w hat I ex pec t e d . ” 62

CONCLUSION As you can see, salvia pr o d uc e d a w id e v a r ie t y o f e f f e c t s in t he s ub je c t s, with so me ex perienc es being m o r e int e ns e t ha n o t he r s. T he s ub je c t s s e lf a d minister ed low doses of s a lv ia a nd exp e r ie nc e d t hr e s ho ld e f f e c t s. T he a n cie nt sham ans bur ned bales o f s a lv ia le a v e s ins id e o f s e a le d t e nt s w he r e t hey wo uld i m m er se them selv es in s m o k e a nd r e m a in in a v is io na r y s t a t e fo r lo ng p e r iod s of tim e. Ev en thoug h t he s ub je c t s o nly exp e r ie nc e d a m e r e f r a c t io n of salviaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s full blown pote nt ia l, t hey a ll a g r e e d t ha t it w a s unlik e a ny t h in g they had e ver tried. If you intend to tr y salv ia w hile it is is s t ill le g a l, b e s ur e t o d o your r e s e a r c h. Salvia can be a ver y power f ul a nd uns e t t ling ex p e r ie nc e fo r t he unp r e p a r e d . Do no t tr y salv ia unsuper v is e d , o r if yo u ha v e a his t o r y o f m e nt a l illne s s.

Comic Book Heroes By Brian Visaggio

Po w ! A s i n g l e p u n c h f l e w, a n d I w a s r i g h t t h e r e , a s S p i d e r - M a n m o v e d i n to dr ag the deadly enemy to the ground. He was fighting for his mind, for h i s i d e n t i t y. Tr i c k e d i n t o a m i s t o f i l l u s i o n by t h e a p t l y n a m e d , M y s t e r i o, t h e w e b - h e a d p u n c h a n d k i c k e d a n d s w u n g h i s w a y b a c k t o l u c i d i t y, s t r u g gling to clear the mist in his head. All his doubts, all his self-hatred was poured out in front of him, the illusions of his friends and family telling h i m , “ D o n’ t b e a h e r o ! B e t t e r t o u s e y o u r p o w e r f o r y o u r s e l f – g e t r i c h ! Get women!” But how could that be tr ue? Spider-Man had done so much f o r s o m a n y. I s n’ t t h a t w h a t h e r o e s h a v e a l w a y s d o n e ? A n d I w a s t h e r e f o r i t a l l , f o r e v e r y p u n c h i n t h e t h i c k a n d s w i r l i n g f o g. I t w a s We b o f S p i d e r - M a n # 9 0 , o n e o f m y v e r y f i r s t c o m i c s . I ’ d b e e n r eading them for maybe four or five months at that point, and had made the tr ansition between the Super man books my dad had brought home for me one night, and the Spider-Man and X-Men books of my contempor aries. I d i d n’ t h a v e v e r y m a n y, a n d t h o s e I d i d h a v e w e r e s o s t r a n g e , s o c o n f u s i n g. T h e y w e r e t o o w r a p p e d u p i n t h a t t h i c k , e n d l e s s c o n t i n u i t y, i n s t o r y details, in plot for a nine-year-old to follow; the Super man books had him stuck as a time tr aveling amnesiac for some godawful reason, and in X-Men ther e was all of that and mor e: hidden identities, cloning, mindt r a n s f e r. A n d s o m a n y h e a v y q u e s t i o n s , w h i c h a l l b a s i c a l l y c a m e d o w n t o 64

“what the hell is going on”, hung over the books. But I was still so young t h a t I d i d n’ t e v e n k n o w h o w t o b e g i n f o l l o w i n g t h e s e s t o r i e s , a n d I k e p t r eading, and r eading, and r eading them. I picked them up in little drops, a n i s s u e h e r e f r o m U n c a n n y X - M e n , o n e f r o m E x c a l i b u r , a n o t h e r f r o m We b of Spider-Man. But I kept r eading, and on Christmas 1993, befor e I was old enough to really appreciate the mind-boggling gift I was being given, my dad bought me the fir st two issues of Alex Ross’s Mar vels. Mar vels, you have to under stand, is a master piece, and I appr eciated it as m u c h a s I c o u l d . I h a r d l y k n e w w h a t t o m a k e o f i t . F i r s t , t h e b o o k d i d n’ t look like anything I’d ever seen before. It was painted. It was lifelike. It was 1993, and in 1993 all comic books looked pretty much the same – unreasonably bulging muscles on dar k, unshaven, gritty antiheroes in body ar mor car r ying P90 submachine guns, or covered in spikes and arcane cloaks, or in hideous single-piece spandex suits inexplicably teamed with tr ench coats. But Mar vels looked to the past; the superheroes looked like, well, superheroes. And not only that, but I was no longer accompan y i n g t h e m o n t h e i r a d v e n t u r e s . I w a s n’ t a p a r t i c i p a n t a n y m o r e – I w a s a witness, on the sidelines, watching with breathless awe, or with hear ts t o p p i n g f e a r, a n d I c o u l d b o t h s e e t h e d e s t r u c t i o n t h e y c a u s e d a n d t h e shear physical beauty of the battles themselves, which only made it seem e v e n m o r e r e a l . A n d t h o u g h I d i d n’ t k n o w i t a t t h e t i m e , i t r a i s e d s e r i o u s issues and questions and got me thinking about superheroes in a ver y p a r t i c u l a r w a y. The seeds were planted before then. Comics are supposed to be fun,

r i g h t ? A n d w h e n I w a s a k i d I c o u l d r e a d t h e m f o r f u n . I w a s n’ t t o o c o n c e r n e d a b o u t s t o r y a r c s o r c r o s s o v e r s o r c o n t i n u i t y. I t w a s t h e c h a r a c t e r s a n d t h e i r a d v e n t u r e s a c r o s s t h e p a g e . I c o u l d n’ t w o r r y t o o m u c h a b o u t how these soap oper as resolved themselves, as long as I knew that Gambit l o v e d R o g u e , b u t c o u l d n e v e r t o u c h h e r, o r h e r p o w e r w o u l d k i l l h i m , o r t h a t n o b o d y c o u l d r e a l l y t a k e d o w n Wo l v e r i n e – t h e l i t t l e f u z z b a l l h a d t h e metal stripped from his skeleton and sur vived! But it was never only for fun, because, you see, I r ead Mar vel comics, and Mar vel’s books always had some sor t of overarching spin or theme. So from the beginning I was t r a i n e d t o l o o k a l i t t l e d e e p e r i n m y b o o k s – a t X - M e n’ s f a b l e o n t o l e r a n c e , f o r e x a m p l e , o r a t S p i d e r - M a n’ s b i t t e r o b l i g a t i o n – “ w i t h g r e a t p o w e r comes gr eat r esponsibility”. But in Mar vels, Alex Ross tried to take the w h o l e i d e a o f t h e s u p e r h e r o, t h e r o m p i n g m a d m e n w h o t r a i p s e d a b o u t i n colorful spandex doing good deeds, and think about what it means. W h e n y o u ’ r e a k i d , m a y b e y o u d o n’ t t h i n k a b o u t m e a n i n g t o o m u c h . I d i d n’ t , a t l e a s t . S u p e r h e r o e s s p o k e t o s o m e t h i n g i n m e , b u t I c o u l d n’ t p u t m y f i n g e r o n w h a t i t w a s . A p p a r e n t l y, n e i t h e r c o u l d t h e c o m i c b o o k b u s i n e s s . S t a r t i n g w i t h Fr a n k M i l l e r ’ s T h e D a r k K n i g h t R e t u r n s ( 1 9 8 6 ) , which imagined the Batman as despairing and br utal, there had been a spontaneous r ebellion against the aging, standard superhero stories and types. Maybe Super man was just too much of a Boy Scout for the har sh realities of the 1980s, but whatever the reason was, suddenly comics were packed with cynical and violent character s claiming to be the heroes of the new gener ation. T hey killed. T hey car ried big guns. T hey wer e Spawn, a n d Ve n o m , a n d C a b l e , m e r c e n a r i e s a n d d e m o n s , a l l I D a n d n o s u p e r -

e g o. T h e y w e r e c o m p l e t e l y u n r e s t r a i n e d a n d u n r e s t r a i n a b l e , u n s t o p p a b l e forces of will and individualism. They were vicious, punk rock heroes for t h e g r u n g e a g e . U n l i k e S u p e r m a n , t h e y d i d n’ t f i g h t f o r a b e t t e r w o r l d o r f o r a b s t r a c t v a l u e s . T h e y f o u g h t t o f i g h t ; t h o u g h I d i d n’ t k n o w i t a t t h e time, could hardly be aware of it, the basic principle of the superhero was being questioned. S o, w i t h M a r v e l s , a n d l a t e r K i n g d o m C o m e , A l e x R o s s t o o k t h a t q u e s t i o n t o h e a r t , a n d s t a r t e d a t t h e b e g i n n i n g. N o w, f o r l i t t l e n i n e - y e a r - o l d B r i a n , t h i s w a s n’ t i m p o r t a n t . I d i d n’ t k n o w any of this. Hell, all I knew was the grim-and-gritty heroes. Mar vels met me ther e in my ignor ance. Suddenly heroes wer e complex and layer ed. S u d d e n l y t h e i r a c t i o n s h a d c o n s e q u e n c e s . S u d d e n l y, h e r o e s w e r e p e o p l e acting in a wor ld I could comprehend. That was probably the biggest leap R o s s m a d e f o r m e – by p l a c i n g t h e f o c u s o n t h e s t r e e t r a t h e r t h a n i n t h e s k y, t h e s e e v e n t s w e r e n’ t c o m p l e t e l y s e p a r a t e f r o m m y e x p e r i e n c e . M y G o d , h o w w o u l d i t f e e l t o s e e t h e H u m a n To r c h a n d t h e S u b - M a r i n e r b a t t l i n g i n t h e s k i e s a b o v e m e ? H o w c o u l d I r e a c t ? H o w m u s t I ? T h e s e w e r e n’ t the pure, sugar y heroes of stereotype, nor were they the overwrought char acter s I’d known; they were mor al agents of change, both positive and negative. I only ever had the fir st two issues, and I lost the second one within a y e a r. T h e f i r s t , t h e n , s t u c k w i t h m e t h e m o s t , a n d I s t i l l f e e l l i k e I ’ m n i n e y e a r s o l d w h e n I s e e t h e m a n o n f i r e f l y i n g t h r o u g h t h e s k y, o r t h e t i d a l 65

wave falling over the Brooklyn Bridge. I approached the series again t w e l v e y e a r s l a t e r, w h e n I w a s t w e n t y - o n e , a n d c o u l d l o o k a t i t m o r e c r i t i c a l l y. W i t h l i t t l e m o r e l i t e r a r y e x p e r i e n c e u n d e r m y b e l t , I c o u l d s e e i n Mar vels, if not a deliber ate rejection of self-conscious antiheroes, at the least nostalgia for the old tr aditions. It seemed to me that Ross was deliber ately lionizing the classic heroes of his youth in a pur poseful contr ast with the violent, selfish heroes of the ear ly 1990s. Over the cour se of the four-par t series, Ross goes from the fir st heroes i n t h e S e c o n d Wo r l d Wa r t o S p i d e r - M a n i n t h e 1 9 6 0 s , a n d o u r p o i n t o f v i e w man spends the whole time tr ying to figure out what it means for a man to live when super men seemed to be seizing the wor ld, and what it means for the heroes to be here at all. Our protagonist, Phil Sheldon, maintains for much of the last issue that heroes exist to protect the weak, but is c r u s h e d a t S p i d e r - M a n’ s f a i l u r e t o s t o p a y o u n g g i r l f r o m b e i n g k i l l e d . Losing his ability to keep searching, he decides to pass off the question t o t h e n e x t g e n e r a t i o n ; t e l l i n g l y, t h e y o u n g b o y i n q u e s t i o n w o u l d g r o w u p t o b e t h e v i o l e n t , d e s t r u c t i v e G h o s t R i d e r. W h a t g o o d i s p o w e r i f y o u c a n’ t s a v e t h e i n n o c e n t ? I t ’ s t h e s o r t o f m o r a l question I’d become interested between 1993 and 2005, with a star k d e l i b e r a t e n e s s f u e l e d by a d v e n t u r o u s f o r a y s i n t o C h r i s t i a n a n t h r o p o l o g y, t h e t h e o l o g i c a l s t u d y o f m a n a n d m a n’ s r o l e a n d p u r p o s e . I n m y o w n c o m i c wor k, I’ ve attempted to r aise some of the same questions. I believe ver y strongly that Ross answer s the question with some finality in Kingdom Come (DC Comics, 1995), his follow-up to Mar vels. 66

I f y o u d o n’ t k n o w t h e p l o t t o K i n g d o m C o m e , I ’ l l s u m i t u p f a i r l y b r i e f l y : t h e wor ld is awash with violent anti-heroes who have taken to simply fighting a m o n g t h e m s e l v e s f o r f u n . L e d by a c y b o r g n a m e d M a g o g , t h e y i n a d v e r tently cause a nuclear accident, wiping out K ansas and bringing Superman, befor e convinced that the wor ld no longer needed him, out of r etir em e n t . H e b u i l d s a c o a l i t i o n c o n s i s t i n g o f t h e c l a s s i c D C H e r o e s – Wo n d e r Wo m a n , t h e Fl a s h , t h e G r e e n L a n t e r n – t o c o n v i n c e t h i s n e w c o t e r i e o f t h e o b l i g a t i o n t h e y h a v e t o t h e p u b l i c g o o d . H o w e v e r, S u p e r m a n h a s l o s t h i s sense of mor al strength, and events spin wildly out of control, and before long, Ar mageddon has broken out; a towering battle between the two sides t h a t t h r e a t e n s t o e n g u l f t h e w o r l d . S t o p p e d o n l y by a n u c l e a r d e t o n a t i o n , Super man comes to realize that their rightful place is to wor k alongside man, not r ule over them; that, in the end, they are not god. Maybe I’m biased. I’m a communitarian, which is to say that I believe in the community good over the individual good, and in finding self-identity i n r e l a t i o n s h i p t o o t h e r s . M a n’ s g r e a t n e s s a n d m a n’ s p u r p o s e a r e b o t h order ed to community life. It’s why we have families and friends, and e v e n t h e m o s t c y n i c a l o f u s g e t s l o n e l y. S o w h e n I s a y t h a t R o s s s e t s u p Kingdom Come as a battle between communitarianism, the order of selfs a c r i f i c e a n d g r e a t e r g o o d r e p r e s e n t e d by S u p e r m a n , Wo n d e r Wo m a n , a n d their ilk, and liber tarianism, the r adical, self-gener ating individual uncons t r a i n e d m o r a l i t y, i t s h o u l d b e c l e a r w h o I ’ m r o o t i n g f o r, a n d w h y. I t ’ s t h e N i e t z s c h e a n s u p e r m a n v e r s u s t h e S u p e r m a n h i m s e l f. W h a t ’ s a t s t a k e i s w h e t h e r S p i d e r - M a n’ s o l d t r o p e a b o u t g r e a t r e s p o n s i b i l i t y i s a n d c a n b e proven tr ue. Ross took the pivotal idea about superheroes and heroism,

the sacrificing, if sometimes misguided, force for public good so pivotal to Mar vels, and puts it in the cr ucible to see if there’s anything good there a l l . To s e e i f i t c a n s u r v i v e . K i n g d o m C o m e i s t h e c h e m i c a l r e a c t i o n . T h e tr agedy and bedlam is the heat of the catalysis. It had to happen. The cultural movement towards the comic book antihero was long, and has roots even in the ear ly wor k of Super man cr eator s J e r r y S i e g e l a n d J o e S h u s t e r, w h o f i r s t t o y e d w i t h t h e c o n c e p t i n a s h o r t s t o r y c a l l e d “ R e i g n o f t h e S u p e r - M a n ” . T h e w r i t i n g o f n o t a b l e b e a t a u t h o r, Jack Kerouac, glorified the individual and the individual’s quest above the community orientation of the immediately preceding gener ation, and the authority that found its champion in Super man was intensely scr utinized during the Nixon year s. By the time the 1980s had rolled around, postmoder nism finally r eached comic books. But the old br eed and new existed s i d e by s i d e e v e n a s t h e l a t t e r r i d i c u l e d t h e f o r m e r a s b e i n g o u t d a t e d a n d n a ï v e . E v e n C a p t a i n A m e r i c a b r i e f l y t u r n e d h i s b a c k o n t h e f l a g. So the conflict is also over meaning, and whether or not ther e is substance to idealism and symbols. T hese ar e questions that matter to me, and I believe should matter to ever yone. As long as I’ ve believed in God, I’ve believed in symbols and in idealism, so the fight, the conflict, the debate matter s. In Mar vels, Ross proposed that heroes ar e her e to be our protector s, but in Kingdom Come, we see the cost of that. Superheroes a r e u l t i m a t e l y t h e v i c t i m s o f t h e o r i g i n a l G r e e k t r a g i c f l a w : h u b r i s . Fr o m Spider-Man on, those with power s have seen it as their vocation and duty to protect the weak. But to them, ever yone is and must be weak. T he power s elevate them above mankind, and in Kingdom Come, mankind rebels

against that patronizing condescension. By taking themselves as the protector s of the people, they take from them responsibility for their own l i v e s . T h e y t a k e f r o m m a n , m a n’ s d e s t i n y. T h e y t a k e m a n’ s g r e a t n e s s . T hat’s the problem. T hat’s the problem Ross was looking for in Mar vels but never quite found, and emerged in strength in Kingdom Come. That’s the problem that I spent year s wondering about and have str uggled to resolve in my own wor k. Superheroes are not gods. If their great power s g i v e g r e a t r e s p o n s i b i l i t y, i t i s t h e r e s p o n s i b i l i t y t o i n s p i r e . I n S u p e r m a n , a l w a y s t h e a r c h e t y p a l h e r o, I t h i n k I ’ v e f o u n d t h e m o d e l o f e v e r y t h i n g they’re supposed to be, the resolution to the question that has driven m e . I ’ v e a l w a y s b e l i e v e d t h a t S u p e r m a n’ s g r e a t e s t a b i l i t y i s n’ t h i s s u p e r strength, or his heat-vision, or his ability to fly so fast that time itself m o v e s b a c k w a r d s . I t ’ s h i s m o r a l s e n s e , h i s h u m i l i t y, h i s c l a r i t y o f v i s i o n . And these are all the human vir tues he lear ned from his parents before h e c o u l d d o a n y o f t h o s e t h i n g s . A l l o f t h o s e p o w e r s b e l o n g by r i g h t t o C l a r k K e n t a n d t o e v e r y o n e . S u p e r m a n’ s h o n e s t v o c a t i o n , t h e n , i s n o t t o fly around the wor ld in blue tights, but to be, and I do not exagger ate h e r e , h o l y. Alex Ross answer s his question. What ar e superheroes for? In our wor ld, the real wor ld, where they exist only in comics and on films, just as much as in their own, this question needed to be answered. And who knew the answer was so simple? Superheroes exist to inspir e man to spiritual and mor al gr eatness. In the end, that’s all any of us have to be. 67

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The Aughties opened u p w i t h a s t y l e b o o k t h a t c e l e b r a t e d deconstructive fashion . Ta k e a p e r f e c t l y g o o d p a i r o f j e a n s , tear them apar t and s e w b a c k t o g e t h e r w i t h e m b e l l i s h m e n t s , inver te d seams and w i c k e d c o r r o s i v e t r e a t m e n t s g a l o r e . H o w it’s done has taken a n e w e r h i g h r o a d t o a d d t h e “ r e ” a n d drop the “de” for mor e f i n i s h e d , u p s c a l e l o o k s u s i n g t h e b e s t of r ec y cled f abrics, sil h oue t t e s an d c ol or pal e t t e s. T h e E m p t i e s will soon give way to t h e Te e n i e s , a n d w i t h i t n e w t r e n d s a n d re-imaginings of coutu r e f r o m b e f o r e w i l l a b o u n d . At the head of this m o v e m e n t i s t h e B r o o k l y n , N Y h o u s e Mandate of Heaven. T h e i r Va u d e v i l l e d r e s s i n g - r o o m p l a y s u i t s , jumpers and separates c a u g h t m y e y e a n d m a d e i t g l e a m w i t h the potential for a new d i r e c t i o n i n s u m m e r s t r e e t w e a r. B r e e z y, feminine and sexy to t h e n t h , M a n d a t e ’s f a s h i o n s a r e r i p e f o r m ak ing a scene while ma k in g t h e Sc e n e . E ac h out f i t i s h a n d made and one of a k i n d . T h e i r o u t f i t s a r e d e s i g n e d f o r t h e alpha female, but spe c i a l s i z e o r d e r s a n d r e q u e s t s a r e m o r e than welcome. Check o u t t h e f u l l l i n e a t t h e i r M y s p a c e p a g e : w w w. my space.co m//ma n d a t e _ of_ h e a ve n .

CREDITS Art Direction – Christian Detres P h o t o g r a p h y – S a r a h Wa l o r Styling – Christian Detres H a i r / M a k e - Up – D a y n a o f Va m p s a n d v i x e n s . n e t M o d e l s – C l a i r e Tu i t e , Ty l e r Wi l l i a m s S p e c i a l t h a n k s g o o u t t o B y g o n e s Vi n t a g e F a s h i o ns (in Car ytown) f o r t h e m a j o r i t y o f t h e a c c e s s o r i e s y o u ’ l l s ee here. Need S u p p l y, a l w a y s a f r i e n d o f RVA i n e v e r y w a y, i s responsible for t h e f r e s h g i l d e d p l a i d s h i r t i n t h e l a s t p a n e l o f t his sho o t . O f c o u r s e , s u p p o r t c o m e s f r o m m a n y d i f f e r e n t p l a ces, so Todd at t h e B y r d , J o h n w i t h t h e r e c o r d p l a y e r, S a r a h ’s roommate with t h e c l e a n b e d , D o c a t t h e F o u n t a i n B o o k s t o r e - yo u a ll ma ke it happen.