Durango Telegraph - January 3, 2018

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Don’t call it a comeback

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Jan. 3, 2019 Vol. XVIII, No. 1 durangotelegraph.com

inside

T H E

O R I G I N A L

I N D I E

W E E K L Y

L I N E

O N

Ups and downs

Common ground

Purg starts New Year with lots of snow, some hiccups p9

The top stories that defined the West in 2018 p10

D U R A N G O

&

B E Y O N D

Crappy New Year! Can’t get off the struggle bus? Here’s the next best thing p14


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lineup

boilerplate

4 La Vida Local

Ups and downs

4 Thumbin’ It

Deep snow spells delays on first big powder day in recent memory by Tracy Chamberlin

5 Word on the Street

10

6 Soapbox

A look at the trends that defined the West in 2018

8 ReTooned

7 Community Voices

Fire and rain by Allen Best

10 Mountain Town News

12-13

12-13 Day in the Life

Celebrating winter’s momentous return to the Southwest

17 Top Shelf

16 Flash in the Pan

Snow daze

photos by Stephen Eginoire

18-20 On the Town

14

20 Ask Rachel 21-22 Free Will Astrology

Overserved?

22 Classifieds

Hangovers: remedies from simple to slightly insane by Donna Hewett

22 Haiku Movie Review

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23 Murder Ink On the cover: Hogsback under a blanket of freshly fallen snow (Keen observers will notice a pair of hikers standing on top.)/ Photo by Stephen Eginoire

Souper soup Eternal broth the culinary gift that keeps on giving

by Ari LeVaux

EDITORIALISTA: Missy Votel (missy@durangotelegraph.com) ADVERTISING AFICIONADO: Lainie Maxson (lainie@durangotelegraph.com) RESIDENT FORMULA ONE FAN: Tracy Chamberlin (tracy@durangotelegraph.com)

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he Durango Telegraph publishes every Thursday, come hell, high water, beckoning singletrack or monster powder days. We are wholly owned and operated independently by the Durango Telegraph

STAR-STUDDED CAST: Lainie Maxson, Chris Aaland, Clint Reid, Stephen Eginoire, Tracy Chamberlin, Jesse Anderson, Zach Hively, Donna Hewett, Stacy Reuille-Dupont, Sarah Rankin and Shan Wells

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friend or dog, we will accept full responsibility in a public flogging in the following week’s issue. Although “free but not easy,” we can be plied with schwa, booze and flattery.

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telegraph

Ear to the ground:

“He told me I sound like a chainsmoking hooker from the 1950s. He always says the nicest things.” – Local crud-sufferer on a friend’s sympathetic words

Of love and money

thepole

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RegularOccurrences

The ball has dropped, the last needle fallen from the tree and the empty liquor bottles and cans hauled out to the curb. Which can only mean one thing: time to start working on those New Year’s resolutions. And if you’re like most Americans, losing weight and exercising more is near the top of your list. According to a poll of more than 1,000 Americans taken by Offers.com, fighting the holiday bulge topped the list of folks’ goals for the New Year. Thirtyeight percent of respondents put “exercise more/lose weight” at the top of their wish list for 2019. Other top contenders included: save money (37 percent); travel (24 percent); get a new job/hobby (12 percent); make new friends (11 percent); find love (7 percent); and other (3 percent.) However, as we all know, Coloradans – and particularly Durangotangs – tend to be an active lot. As such, exercise/lose weight was tied at the No. 2 spot (27 percent) along with travel (27). Coming in at No. 1 was save money (41 percent), no surprise given the unofficial “mountain tax.” Lower down the list, 17 percent were hoping to score a new job or hobby (or hobby job?) and 12 percent were looking for love (mountain towns can be a lonely place.)

Earthly pleasures

Looking for a book to cozy up to the fire with? Cortez-based writer and occasional Telegraph contributor, Curt Melliger has just released a book, Heaven Here on Earth. After years of freelance writing, this is Melliger’s first book and a new take on an ancient, archaic, almost forgotten subject: access to the divine while still breathing. Down through the ages, a number of sages have suggested that heaven is actually on earth, or at least available here by way of various means. However, most modern religions have strayed from that message, advising us to repent our wicked nature and reject pleasures of the flesh. Well, they’ve got it all wrong, according to Melliger. “We don’t have to wait to experience heaven. Indeed, heaven is waiting for us,” he writes in book’s intro. “It lurks behind bushes, below bridges and inside abandoned buildings. It hides on top of high mountains, in deep cool canyons, and at the bottom of the lake. It resides within storm clouds, bolts of lightning, and the colors of a rainbow.” The book explores how, where and why heaven is accessible right here on Earth – and best of all, it’s totally free. Heaven Here on Earth is available online at ozarkmt.com, amazon.com or barnesand noble.com. It is also available in e-book from Kindle. For more info, visit curtmelliger.com.

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opinion

LaVidaLocal The long way home “What are you willing to give? What are you not willing to give?” These are the first two items on my 7-year-old son’s questionnaire that he distributed to his neighborhood friends, in an effort to help the homeless population of Durango. At the time, I chuckled about his ingenuity, reflecting on how smart it is to explore the depths of donators’ pockets before agreeing upon a donation. It was my brother, however, who drew my attention to the deeper layers of these questions and it is my answers to them that have haunted me since. Here are the things that I have been able to give to Durango’s homeless: a few dollars to whomever I see asking; a two-person tent and camp stove to a toothless woman in the Wal- Mart parking lot; an old backpack, filled with 5-gallon baggies of personal hygiene supplies; Tshirts and socks; a big jar of change that was just sitting on my dresser at home; some Subway gift cards; and a few minutes of my time to listen and engage. In December 2017, the city of Durango allocated $33,000 to hire an advocate to work for the benefit of the Durango homeless population. The idea was to have this position filled early in 2018. The position has never been filled, and the idea was dropped in the middle of the year when the fires broke out. Since then, the homeless people have shuffled around from a camp west of Durango, to Escalante Middle School, to near Manna, to the base of Hogsback. The idea for a permanent home next to the Dog Park was nixed due to uranium deposits in the area. In November, the homeless population again set up camp west of town, but have since been told to leave by officials, but no alternative options have been given. Most recently, the ACLU and the National Law Center on Homelessness have stepped in to draw attention to the harsh treatment of Durango’s homeless population. These groups state that the most basic step is establishing a permanent place for homeless residents to set up camp and stay any time of day, while working on a more permanent solution. It is unfortunate that the oversight of outside entities has been a motivating factor in the care of our most vulnerable population. Nighttime temperatures in Durango have been plummeting to the single digits, and I am painfully aware that my ability to sit here on my couch, in a heated home, is the result not so much of my hard work, but luck. Mine isn’t so much a story of pulling one’s self up by her bootstraps, but rather

the inheritance of some pretty sturdy boots. In this light, my heart hurts for those who are not so fortunate. Once, when I was driving through Bodo Park, I saw a woman and a man hitchhiking. My mind fast-forwarded through all the logical reasons I should not pick them up, three kids in the car, a bunch of gear in the back. As I passed them, the woman threw up her arms and said, “Oh come on, sister!” All those reasons melted away, and the more prevalent thought was, “She’s right. She is my sister.” I drove this woman and her son into town. They were not homeless, but with a rental outside of town, no car and jobs in town, they were closer to the edge than I am. The woman lamented the fact that the trolley now costs $1 to ride each way, saying there are many people who can’t afford to do this every day. She talked about how wealthy people were flocking to our little town and saying things like, “There is a real problem with homelessness here. (The city of Durango) needs to do something about it.” She said, “That’s the real problem. It’s not that they need to do something about it. It’s that we do.” I am fortunate to have always had a roof over my head, 15 of those roofs here in Durango. Like many of us who live here, whether it be in the protection of a house or at the mercy of the elements, we agree there is no place like our Animas River valley. While the full name of the Animas River is Rio de las Animas Perdidas, we call the river and the valley “life.” All lives are valuable and every human deserves respect and compassion. My solution isn’t grand. It doesn’t pave the wave for the reformation of an entire paradigm that sets people up to fall after having once slipped. I don’t attempt to break the homeless population into smaller ones based on who has chosen this lifestyle vs. those who need support to get out of it. I don’t rate the worth of a being on his or her level of substance abuse or psychological state. I don’t know how a city whose needs for improvement outnumber the dollars in the budget can fund a long-term solution. I just urge anyone who has read this story to honor and validate the humanity in every person you encounter. We can come together to discuss a more permanent, non-prohibitive shelter for Durango’s homeless, and in the meantime, provide an outdoor camping option that works for all members of the community. We owe it to each other, in this time of immense worldly suffering, to do at least this.

Thumbin’It An epic change in the winter outlook, with a series of glorious storms pummeling the area in the last week, making for happy skiers, residents and reservoirs

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– Sarah Rankin

This Week’s Sign of the Downfall: More bad news for Durango transit riders, with even deeper cuts to the budget in 2019 thanks to a restructuring in the way the CDOT allocates grants, which make up 90 percent of the City’s transit budget

Lawmakers working to reform drug convictions in an effort to stem the state’s swelling prison population, most of which is due to an epidemic of substance addiction

The third vehicle in almost as many weeks plunging off the side of one of the area’s hairy mountain passes

An end to singing the “3.2 Blues,” with abolishment of the state’s Prohibition-era 3.2 law and the arrival of full-strength beer in Colorado grocery stores Jan. 1

The languishing stalemate over the government shut down, with Trump holding thousands of federal workers and programs hostage over his border wall funding

telegraph

Happy New Species!

A British company, EnviroBuild, purchased the rights to name a newly discovered species of amphibian from Panama, and they named it after our president: “demorphis donaldtrumpi.” They did so because this slimy worm emulates Trump’s behavior when it comes to climate change (burrowing its head in the mud and ignoring the danger), and because of the ironic fact that this creature might go extinct due to its namesake’s stance on global warming.


Q

WordontheStreet With the great New Year’s storm of 2019, the Telegraph asked: “How are you surviving the snowpocalypse?”

“Layering up.”

Amanda Hunt

“I’m from New York, so this is normal.”

Francine Romeo

“Drinking.”

Chris Hesse

“Chocolate.”

“The warmth of my friends.”

Skyler Parks

Yvonne Bock

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Jan. 3, 2019 n 5


SoapBox Best pick-me-up is helping others To the editor, For those that have the basics of a warm bed, bathroom and meals – count your lucky stars. Giving back to family and friends in an emergency will always be in us to do everywhere on Earth. The “other people” in dire need, whom we do not know personally, are here in the USA, caravan asylum seekers and refugees from the Middle East (who rarely get coverage because of the hundreds of killed/jailed journalists), many more and last to be thought about seriously at the bottom rung. All of the “other people” have their own personal story, either true or a desperate little lie that works to generate enough money for the ache in the belly. Buddy, if you can spare a dime, here in our area, please think about Women’s Resource Center. A potluck every other month at the Rochester Hotel is where you can pitch in 35 bucks toward a group of local people needing a one-time chance for help. If you got more to spare, do local and global giving year-around. Feels good, promise. – Sally Florence, Durango

Thanks for doing a thankless Job To the editor, Despite the peculiar yet popular predilection by the populace to vote against tax increases and yearn for keeping things the way they were (hey, like Rico), I would like to recognize one of the unheralded services that are incredibly cost-efficient, well run (despite being woefully understaffed) and one that helps keep Durango a great place to live and not just a place to visit (like Silver-

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thorne): Code Enforcement. I’ve spent most of my career in construction and infrastructure management and quickly learned that the only thing worse than well-managed infrastructure is one that is ignored. Kudos to Steve Barkley and his crew for their good work! – JD Watson, Durango

Little Joe’s Christmas Usually a week before Christmas, my father would gather some of his World War II veterans for dinner. They would reminisce about their days in the service. One of my favorite stories that he recounted was that of “Little Joe” and Gus. Recently, while rummaging through memorabilia that my dad left me, I found a small sketch that he did of “Little Joe” and Gus. It prompted me to recall this tale. On Dec. 16, 1944, the Germans attacked an 80-mile front along the Ardennes. My father was an infantryman with the 1st Division during that time. Near the town of Bullingen, Belgium, in the Northern Sector, fighting became fierce and chaos reigned. My dad’s buddy and squad leader was Gus. They were ordered to reconnoiter a small hamlet. As they cautiously entered, they found it deserted except for a small mongrel dog. Gus stuck the dog in his wool coat and they continued patrolling only to find the village abandoned. On returning from their reconnaissance, they brought this mangy little character to the allied lines. Gus dubbed him “Little Joe.” He quickly became the platoon mascot. Within the next six hours, there was a thunderous barrage as the Germans began their offensive. Apparently Little Joe was spooked and ran into a snowy field. Gus instinctively ran after the little pup. About 200 yards from the trench, Gus was hit by a sniper. My father and

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his comrades watched in horror. There was no attempt to rescue Gus as the German infantry had their unit pinned down. They couldn’t see Gus through the drifts and sleet. They only hoped that Gus was still alive. By evening they heard a faint barking in the distance. This alerted them that Gus may surely still be alive. The platoon waited till dark, and my dad and a few corpsmen crawled into the field to rescue Gus. They finally reached him, and to their surprise they found Little Joe lying on his chest. Apparently, the sapper’s bullet had penetrated both legs but miraculously missed any vital arteries. The corpsman believed that “Little Joe,” by lying on Gus’ chest, kept him alive through the freezing night. Gus was dragged back and was driven to a field hospital. Little Joe wouldn’t leave his side. A few months later, a photo was sent to my father of Gus and “Little Joe” celebrating Christmas in northern France. My father always said, “In the darkest of times, always look for the light.” Little Joe was surely Gus’s little beacon. I looked for the photo but all I could find was the sketch. – Burt Baldwin, Ignacio

“We’ll print damned-near anything”

The Telegraph prides itself on a liberal letters policy. We offer this forum to the public to settle differences, air opinions & undertake healthy discourse. We have only three requests: limit letters to 750 words, letters must be signed by the writer; and thank-you lists and libelous, personal attacks are unwelcome. Send your insights by Tuesday at noon to: PO Box 332, Durango, 81302 or e-mail your profundities to: telegraph@durangotelegraph.com. Let the games begin ...


CommunityVoices

Finding the light Thirteen things to keep your spirits up this winter

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inter is here! Many of us love it. But, for others, it means dark, cold, lonely days. As a psychologist, I tend to see the latter this time of year. No matter which camp you are in, here are 13 things you can do to keep your spirits up this winter: 1. Accept your feelings about winter – living in Durango, we cannot not have winter. Acceptance allows for choice. It doesn’t mean you agree with or condone the current situation, it just means you acknowledge what is going on. Acceptance gives you power and allows you to decide what you want to do. 2. Make a pros and cons list: what do you like and not like about winter? From here you can build on things you like and work with what you don’t like. 3. Take stock of your pros & cons. What can help you? Even if you have nothing good to say about winter, reframe what you wrote. Trapped inside can become checking out new indoor spaces, rearranging your furniture or making small steps to get outside a little bit at a time. 4. Make a plan to tackle dark days and loneliness. Find out what local organizations offer for connection and outings this winter. Put them on your calendar so you have things to look forward to and commit to going to them. 5. Get moving. As an exercise scientist-turnedpsychologist, I am amazed at how many people do not use their body to treat their moods. When we don’t move, our energy gets low, and we tend to try using calories to increase it. Hello weight gain (see No. 8.) Instead move – even if your pushups are against a wall and your squats land you on the couch. Check out the Rec Center – being in a warm pool is pretty nice when it’s snowing outside. 6. Do some beach-oriented guided meditations. The power of the mind is great. Just think about a succulent, bright yellow, aromatic lemon. How many of you salivated? Next blizzard, cozy up, put on your earphones, close your eyes and take a 20minute vacation in the comfort of your own home. 7. If it’s cold you hate, make sure you have gear. Get a new blanket (try a weighted one), sweater, bathrobe, slippers, hat or scarf. Get a fake fire app on your phone, TV or computer – you’ll be surprised at your mind’s abilities to create an experience for you if you let it. 8. Take a look at your diet. Many of us eat foods that

leave us feeling depleted, tired and SAD (standard American diet). Eating for mental health includes a variety of foods, especially leafy greens. This gives the body the nutrients it needs to make the neurotransmitters you need for contentment, joy, pleasure and ease. Get with a nutritionist to review your diet and make sure you are getting what you need. Find some new recipes that look

appealing and commit to making a new one every week. If you don’t like to cook, enlist someone to do it for you, take a class or find some new local restaurants to sample. 9. Connect with friends and family. Let them know winter is hard for you and you need some extra support. Set up reoccurring dates: game nights, lunch and movies.

What if I don’t have family or friends? Look around your community for options that interest you, even if you don’t know anyone yet. Some of you may need to take an additional step by getting into therapy, joining a group or reaching out to an online community. Be open to trying – it may be uncomfortable at first, but without being flippant, we have to start somewhere. 10. Be gentle with yourself and others. Work to have compassion. People will say things you don’t like, do things you may think are weird, and struggle to connect with you. When you shift the focus from yourself, you’ll be surprised. If people aren’t your thing look into volunteering with animals. You may even get the added benefit of being outside 11. Take up a new hobby. Find something that’s healthy and commit to learning it. Stay open, even if it’s a bit difficult or boring at first. Staying curious activates your pre-frontal cortex, which helps you stay in the moment, judge, plan and respond rather than react. Stick with it – having grit increases confidence. When you increase confidence, things get a little brighter. 12. Take stock of your thoughts. Do not underestimate your ability to change your mind. Remember that lemon? If lemons don’t do it for you, how about a crunchy pickle? You can hate winter all you want, but the more you tell yourself you hate it, the more you will. If moving to “I love winter” is too much, just go neutral. Move away from the emotional content of your statements and just be objective. Many of us remain trapped in the prison of our minds (about all sorts of things) because we refuse to give up our stories. Hard part of changing your mind … no one can fix the way you think but you. 13. Commit to yourself! By being proactive, you can have a different experience this winter. By noticing the way you talk to yourself, you can learn how to shift your focus and stand a better chance at tolerating what you don’t like. And then, winter be damned, it becomes spring. n – Dr. Stacy Reuille-Dupont is a licensed clinical psychologist and addiction counselor. She’s trained in somatic, cognitive and behavior psychology and is also a kinesiologist and personal trainer.

Stacked Rock Kennels • Boarding • Dog Training • We offer pick up and delivery (to Durango) • Home counsel (we’ll come to you!) 5 miles north of Mesa Verde National Park

www.Stackedrockkennels.com

Facebook: stackedrockkennels/kimberlysilverkincaid

Call/text: 970-317-5446

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Jan. 3, 2019 n 7


ReTooned/by Shan Wells

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Quick’n’Dirty

Snow slides delay Purg opening

After more than a foot of fresh powder fell over the southern San Juan Mountains to start the New Year, the avalanche danger was extremely high. An official warning issued by the Colorado Avalanche Information Center (CAIC) for the areas north of Durango and Pagosa Springs – both prime spots for backcountry enthusiasts – described conditions as very dangerous and travel was not recommended through at least Wed., Jan. 2. The CAIC’s warning for New Year’s Day suggested, “Today is a great day to ski your favorite run at a ski area.” But, even the resorts had some slides to contend with. Purgatory Resort didn’t fire up Lifts 1 and 4 until almost 9:30 a.m. Tues., Jan. 1, because of concerns with “pocket slides,” according to Stacey Glaser, marketing director for Purgatory’s parent company, Mountain Capital Partners. With 13 inches of fresh powder sitting on the hardpacked base of manmade and natural snow, conditions were prime for these smaller, isolated slides, she said. “Avalanche is too strong of a word,” Glaser said of the slides. Several were triggered when employees cut across the top of the resort’s steep slopes, something they typically check for on a powder day at Purgatory before opening the slopes. Later that morning, lifts 3 and 5 got rolling on the back side. Lift 8, however, didn’t start running until around 2:30 p.m. Dealing with pocket slides wasn’t Purg’s only hiccup that day. Due to mechanical issues, lifts 4 and 5 were shut down for a time that day. The fact that throngs of powder-starved skiers all showed up at once, first thing in the morning also complicated matters. Glaser explained that on typical days, it’s more common for guests to space out their arrivals. But after the epic New Year snowfall everyone was ready and waiting for the lifts to fire up. Parking lots were full and, according to Glaser, New Year’s Day was one of the busiest days so far this season. (The resort does not release skier numbers, she said.) Purgatory hasn’t seen a powder day like this since February of last year, according to Glaser, when 15 inches fell Feb. 13. Although it took time to make sure conditions were safe before opening, she said the heavy snowfall was a welcome sight. “We understand people were ready to ski … but the safety of our guests and staff is priority,” she said. “We’ve missed this kind of powder. To start 2019 with over a foot of snow is fantastic.” To get the latest avalanche alerts from the Colorado Avalanche Information Center, visit avalanche.state.co.us. Check out the snowfall and latest news for Purgatory at www.purgatoryresort.com. – Tracy Chamberlin

Purgatory’s Chair 8 eventually opened late in the afternoon on Tues., Jan. 1, after the ski area received more than a foot of snow. According to resort officials, the delay was due to mitigation of “pocket slides” on the mountain./ Photo by Missy Votel

S.J. watershed group hosts meeting With several feet of new snow in the San Juans, fears of another dry summer may be dissipating. Nevertheless, a newly formed group is focusing on the long-term projection of a warmer, drier future and finding ways to manage the area’s dwindling water supplies. Made up of representatives from various river-users, including agriculture, recreation, municipal, industrial and environmental groups, the Upper San Juan Watershed Enhancement Partnership will explain its work and objectives at a public meeting 6-8 p.m., Thurs., Jan. 10, at the CSU Extension Office in Pagosa Springs, 344 U.S. Highway 84. Formed in 2018, the goal of the partnership is to spearhead cooperative ways to ensure the needs of water users are being met while improving the use of water resources. Examples of such projects include ditch lining, improving diversion structures and cooperative water management. The projects will be funded by the Colorado Water Conservation Board as part of the Colorado Water Plan and apply to the San Juan, Piedra, Navajo and Chama rivers and their tributaries. “This effort would take advantage of this funding for the

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benefit of our community,” Aaron Kimple, Mountain Studies Institute’s San Juan Headwaters’ Program director, wrote. “The relevance of water to all aspects of our community cannot be understated … The goal of this effort is to think collectively about opportunities that can help secure the future of water for all uses, while maintaining a healthy ecology and respecting water rights.” The group would ultimately like to address the entirety of the San Juan River Basin, through a phased series of locally focused meetings guided by local water users. “This conversation is designed to include all interests,” wrote Kimple. “Drought and growing pressure from increased water demands and permanent reductions in overall water supply are increasing demand on our water resources. Identifying opportunities to secure the viability of our water resources will help our community to remain viable for future generations.” In an effort to identify water resource issues, opportunities and potential projects, area residents can fill out a survey online at www.surveymonkey.com/r/WP2J6YG. Surveys can also be printed out, filled in and sent to Aaron Kimple c/o Mountain Studies, 679 E. 2nd Ave., Durango, CO 81301. – Missy Votel

Jan. 3, 2019 n

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MountainTownNews

The 416 Fire flared June 1, producing lots of smoke and crippling summer tourism. At 54,000 acres, it was the second-biggest fire near Durango after 2002’s Missionary Ridge Fire./Photo by Stephen Eginoire

Common ground The top stories that defined the West in 2018 by Allen Best

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very mountain town in 2018 struggled with the affordable housing pinch for those working in the hospitality and service industries. Many towns struggled to come up with meaningful climate-action plans. Several in Canada as well as Colorado grappled with rules for marijuana legalization, while a few Colorado towns worked through refinements of rules governing legalization. Here are four other stories from New Mexico to British

Columbia with common themes in 2018. They will almost surely be themes going forward in 2019. 1) Yet another drought in the Southwest Before snowmaking, skiing was never a sure thing until after Christmas at Western resorts. But, in 2018, snowmaking wasn’t enough in New Mexico. Taos had a new hotel, The Blake, to brag about, but snow itself was scarce. Conversely, Whistler did just fine, Montana’s Whitefish had a banner early season, and Jackson Hole’s came in strong. Despite the lack of precipitation, Colorado Ski Country

USA resorts still managed to finish 2018 with 7.1 million skier days. (Vail Resorts, which has four ski areas in Colorado, is not a member of the state-wide industry association). However, the lack of snow had repercussions far beyond economies. The lion’s share of Colorado River water, which supplies cities (mostly orchards and farms) from Cheyenne to Albuquerque and San Diego to Salt Lake, originates as snow in the mountains. And the river ran low – again. From 2000-18, the flows into Lake Powell were 4

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above average during only four years, reports the Bureau of Reclamation. The water year ending in October was 43 percent of average, the third driest year on record, better than only 2002 and 1977. Entering the 21st century, the many reservoirs in the Colorado River Basin collectively were at 94 percent of capacity. As November began, they were at 47 percent of capacity. This long-term decline has water managers scrambling to rethink water use and storage. Shadowing the discussions has been emerging evidence that a warming climate will produce even more droughts in Colorado and other southwestern states in decades to come. Nearly every mountain town was thinking about ways to make their communities more resilient in the face of these slow-moving but monumental changes in water supplies. 2) When smoke gets in your eyes: thinking about wildfires The 416 Fire between Durango and Silverton flared June 1, producing lots of smoke and crippling the summer tourism economies of In 2018, thanks to declining prices for wind and solar, the 100 percent renewable the two mountain towns. At 54,000 acres, it fell short of the threshold goals espoused by many communities began looking attainable./Telegraph file photo of 100,000 acres used by some students of David Perry, the No. 2 at Alterra, downplayed the competition wildfire to describe “megafire.” But in the 21st century, it was the secwith Vail in an interview. There was plenty of money for both comond-biggest fire near Durango after 2002’s Missionary Ridge Fire. Wildfire was a big story in 2018 in most ski towns. Some had panies to make, he suggested. But if that suggests friendly oligopolies, smoky skies, others had fires nearby, and almost every resort town others see a fierce competition shaping up. What’s interesting is skiing participation levels have grown little from Whistler to Aspen was thinking about how to make itself less since the 1980s. Yet the rise in the stock price of Vail Resorts testifies vulnerable. Then came the Camp Fire, which killed 85 people in the foothills there’s money to be made. Stock prices started out at $16 per share at the initial public offerof the Sierra Nevada in November, the most destructive fire in California history. Experts predict many more will come in decades ing in 1997. Even in 2014, it stood at $77 a share. But by September, ahead, as aging forests become more susceptible to wildfire. Too, ill- it had leaped to $294 a share – before tumbling at year’s end to $210 per share. Perhaps a reflection of the new competition from Alterra? advised fire suppression has only delayed the inevitable. 4) Aspirational energy goals lead to action And again, climate change figures into the story. Scientists predict In 2018, thanks to rapidly declined prices for wind and solar, much larger fires for the next several decades, the result of drought along with other small technological imbut also more directly because of warmprovements, the 100 percent renewable ing temperatures. goals espoused by many ski communities The fire north of Durango may have began looking increasingly attainable. been started by embers from the coalColorado’s Wolf Creek Ski Area last fired D&SNGRR train. National drought year could credibly claim to be 100 permaps even into 2019 show the Four Corcent powered by clean energy, the result ners bathed in deep burgundy, the most of its part in developing a solar farm intense drought in the United States. about 45 minutes away in the San Luis Then on July 3, smoke engulfed ColValley. orado’s Roaring Fork Valley, threatening Aspen Electric, which serves part of the power supply to Aspen. the city of Aspen, had achieved the same In Colorado’s Summit County, fire feat several years before. But the ski lifts also flared near Silverthorne, at the foot of Aspen and Vail are powered by electricof the Gore Range. It produced a scare, ity delivered by Holy Cross Electric, a coforcing hundreds to evacuate homes. Thanks to efforts to create buffers be- The battle over skier numbers raged, even while operative. In September, Holy Cross announced tween homes and forests, damage was resorts grappled with low to no snow in it planned to achieve 70 percent renewrelatively light. 2018./Telegraph file photo ables by 2030. Furthermore, it laid out a But what may matter most is that nearly all the houses and other buildings in Summit County are lo- strategy for achieving this, a combination of local power generation cated within the wildland-urban interface. Having wilderness out and imported renewable power from primarily eastern Colorado. Later in fall came more announcements. Vail Resorts had pledged your back yard can be wonderful, but there can be consequences. to be 100 percent emissions neutral, not just in Colorado but in all 3) A second 800-pound gorilla in the ski world In retrospect, of course somebody would come along to challenge of its geographically dispersed enterprises. It inked a deal for a wind Vail Resorts at its own game. Largely under the direction of chief ex- farm in eastern Nebraska to satisfy that declaration. Then Xcel Energy, the dominant electrical supplier in Colorado, ecutive Rob Katz, the company crafted the Epic Pass to create cusannounced in December its goal of 80 percent renewables by 2030 tomer loyalty, improve revenue and create geographic diversity. California hurting for snow? Well, use your Epic Pass in Colorado. and, by 2050, carbon-free power. The latter might involve burning Or Whistler. And last year, as Colorado limped along, Whistler – in coal and sequestering the emissions, or it might involve nuclear, company officials said. its first year as a Vail Resorts property – came on like gangbusters. The company delivers power to both Breckenridge and Nederland, But now there’s a new monster on the block, hatched by KSL Capital Partners and the Chicago-based Crown family, owners of the two Colorado mountain towns that had previously adopted goals of Aspen Skiing Co. Early in 2018, the unnamed company became Al- 100 percent renewables. Also in Colorado, electrical co-ops serving terra, and then later gained its first chief executive, Rusty Gregory, Durango and other mountain towns became increasingly assertive the long-time boss at California’s Mammoth Mountain. As the 2018- about embracing renewables. Next will come electric cars and other incremental changes as 19 season began, it had 14 major resorts on its pass. But Vail didn’t sit idle, adding Crested Butte and Telluride to its lineup, putting it at the 20th century energy system gets turned upside down in ski towns and beyond. n 10 major resorts and three urban ski areas.

telegraph

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dayinthelif

Snowplace like home

W

by Steph en E gin oire

elcome back to the Animas Valley, Old Man Winter been quite some time since we last had to unbury ou from a deep blanket of freshly fallen snow. So thr other log on the fire, wrap yourself in fleece, and sip somethi from your favorite mug because it’s darn cold out there. Here’s

When words don’t do justice. Folks enjoy a New Year’s Day stroll as the latest storm clears.

Add a color photo to your Telegraph classified ad for just $20/week. (Just like Craigslist ... but a lot less creepy.) For more info, email:classifieds@durangotelegraph.com or call 970-259-0133

12

n Jan. 3, 2019

teleg


r! It has urselves row aning hot a look:

graph

Bluebird skies between storms.

Far left: If you stand around long enough, snow-topped rocks in the Animas River start to look like marshmallows floating in a river of hot chocolate. Almost. Left: Intricate ice patterns following a cold, clear night. Jan. 3, 2019 n 13


thesecondsection

Crappy New Year! If you can’t stay on the wagon, you can at least get off the struggle bus a little sooner by Donna Hewett

S

o thirsty (it’s so early!) you would kill your dog for a glug of water. Four hours later you wake again, this time with a headache that may as well be an open wound. An acidulent stomach churns upward. Bloody eyes are stuck. Your leggings have rips at the knees. As you wrestle to the bed (from the floor), you realize your shoes are still on. What happened? In finality, you are a loathsome, fall-down drunk, and no amount of Advil or egg soup will soothe this specter of doom. Guilt inflames lethargy, or is it the other way around? Shame is such a shitty feeling, especially the first day of a bright, new year. It’s an insulating fear, so it is best to answer all your text messages quickly, so your friends know you’re still alive. Then, turn your phone off and stay in bed. Which is where I am, dear reader. And if I may add, nothing’s more debilitating than trying to write about a hangover while in the midst of one. But I’m getting ahead of myself. There are two explanations for a hangover, a short one and a long one. The short one hardly needs to be mentioned: a person gets a hangover because he or she drinks too much. The long one is predicated upon the way the human body functions. We all know this. I’d prepared this year not to be hung. How? First off, I did what I never do: I ate a really fine breakfast on the eve of. I drank a six-pack of Pedialyte during the day to ward off any pre-existing dehydration stemming from the previous nights’ drunk. Secondly: the celebratory

14 n Jan. 3, 2019

drink of choice was not to be the usual Maker’s Mark Manhattans. Why? Congeners, the toxic chemicals formed during fermentation, are thought to be widely responsible for nut-cracking headaches; bourbon drinkers ingest 30 times the amount of congeners as those who drink vodka. So the clearer the drink, the clearer the drunk. Right? We switch to Grey Goose martinis. Nothing sparkling. Nothing sugary. Just a little dirty because the brine of olives is basically the same as pickles, which means a little side-dose of electrolytes to keep things healthyish. That’s the plan anyway. Alcohol is toxic (intoxication, duh). It’s thought to destroy your body’s electrolytes, dehydrates you of precious body fluids, and strips away vital nutrients. So before we step out, I swallow a couple multi-vitamins, which would choke a horse, and chase it with a nice glug of blue Gatorade and a dripping tablespoon of Pepto-Bismol (thus doing away with the prerequisite, high-caloric greasy meal). All set.

telegraph

Not so fast. Literally. She who drinks fast, pays slow. If the liver gets more booze than it can metabolize in its plodding fashion (a shot, aka 1 ounce, per hour) a hangover is pending. More than one drink per hour, and you start building up excess alcohol in your blood steam. And therein lays the road map for trouble ahead. My first two martinis go down pretty quick. I sit out the next round with a tall glass of H2O and a small plate of cheese cubes. Good girl. But it’s the next round – and another – where I lose control (or at least count). Before I know it, it’s already past midnight, and I’m chain smoking filtered cigarettes while swaying to the Chainsmokers, my second misstep toward a serious hangover. Most everyone knows that drinkers who smoke are inclined to smoke more when punishing the bottle. What’s never mentioned is the fact that alcohol dilates the blood vessels (producing bloodshot eyes), while smoking contracts them. The smoke more often wins out over the alcohol, contracting veins in the head and brain, which causes even more horrendous headaches and sometimes odd twinging pains in other parts of the body. Back at the house, I’m thinking this is the last cloudy, crucial moment – between drunk and passed out, to medicate in order to stave off what’s tumbling toward me. I swear never to get drunk again, then bolt down two Tylenol with a can of ice-cold Coors (not the Silver Bullet, but the real thing) before I remember: acetominophen in combination with alcohol does horrendous things to the liver. The damage is exponential.4


Damn it. I fall into a sodden, dreamless sleep and wake up tired as hell to my husband shaking my shoulders, warning me again about sleep apnea. I don’t snore, I remind him. But it doesn’t matter if I do or don’t because I’m in a mini depression, which takes us back to the beginning of last year’s final holiday. Sorry to say that even in 2019, no one truly understands the complete anatomy of “crapulous.” Concerning hangover cures and preventatives, most of the “research” on the internet is repetitive (sometimes conflicting) nonsense. The most recent attempt in the publishing world is a cute read entitled, Hungover: The Morning After and One Man’s Quest for a Cure, by Shaughnessy Bishop-Stall (a drinker’s name if ever there was one). Here’s a Canadian who spent 10 years roving all over the world doing research (drinking) in order to find the ingredient (or combination thereof) that will stave off the horrendous after-effects of too much “proof.” He spends a lot of time trying various tricks, everything from doctor administrated IV drips in Las Vegas to eating charcoal scraped off his fireplace (mixed nicely with a bit of milk). And why not? To avoid the heaves, the Romans chugged roasted owlet and sheep eyes and the ashes of a swallow’s beak (poor things). Spoiler alert! Bishop-Stall’s miracle cure is a combination of stuff that, correctly assembled and administered at the proper time, wards off the nastier symptoms of overdoing it. According to him, just before sleep, ingest: a jumble of N-acetylcysteine, or NAC for short, an amino acid and immune system aid; a bouquet of B vitamins (B1, B6 and B12) to boost the metabolism; milk thistle for the liver; and frankincense. Yes, the gift to Jesus is an anti-inflammatory. But none of these changes the fact that a lack of good REM sleep produces a moody, grouchy person with little brain function. Time and rest, and a “second sleep” seem the only cure here. For the more topical hangover distressors, different remedies work for different people. For the Australians, it’s Recoverthal and Marmite. In America, it’s coffee, Blowfish,

Irish I was dead ...

Although you may feel like sticking your head in the sand after a rough night out, the ancient Irish took this to a whole different level – quite literally. When someone was suffering from especially cruel after-effects, they were buried up to their necks in river sand. It’s not clear how – or if – this remedy worked. But, at the very least, it kept the moaning and groaning out of ear shot.

Around the world Match the country with its preferred hangover cure, and win a prize. Or at least give yourself a good hangover-day activity.

Tiger Balm, Gatorade and CBDs. (Whatever happened to Chaser? That seemed to work a bit.) For the Brits, it’s a full English breakfast of bangers and a couple Black Velvets. The Polish swear by pickle juice. Mexicans turn to menudo and michelada (spicy beer); the Scottish trust Irn Bru (a supplemented orange soda). For the Koreans, it’s a lot of pho. Some just stay drunk. Which might be smart. Most MDs agree that one can avoid a hangover by not drinking at all. Duh. But if that’s not humanly possible, then water, coconut water, fresh air and eggs top the list of alleviators. Eggs are the most-mentioned food, dating from eons back, and it’s bona fide. They contain cysteine, a substance that breaks down acetaldehyde, a hang-over causing toxin in alcohol. The rest – bananas, honey, avocados, burnt toast, oatmeal, exercise – is so bland, that in a sense I prefer Bishop-Stall’s final recommendation if all else fails: “Climb, or drive or helicopter yourself to a remote hilltop in the Alps; descend into a catacomb, lie for a while in a coffin of herb- and grass-infused water poured from a boiling cauldron, emerge to be buried completely in hay, lay with the remnants of your hangover for just a bit longer, then finally arise – up and out, into the mountain air. Then you sit down for a plate of food, and some ancient orange Austrian wine.” Right on. But seriously, the only real way to get past a hangover is to soldier your way through (especially if there’s no oxygen tank readily available). I used to think I was hangover immune, but age has changed that, and recovery takes longer (thanks, perhaps, to lower production of the antioxidant glutathione). In any case, with my vast drinking experience, I recommend that in the future you chase the demon with a Stoli bloody, then take a hit or two off a good joint. And what’s more, like everyone else on Earth, I do have, and will reveal here, my own hangover miracle serum: Alka-Seltzer Morning After. Boom. Brunch anyone? By golly, I crave an egg sandwich. n

telegraph

*For answers, see next week’s Telegraph. Just kidding. If you can’t figure this out on your own, you need more help than we can offer. Good luck!

Jan. 3, 2019 n 15


FlashinthePan

Cháoing down on perpetual potion by Ari LeVaux

A

restaurant in Bangkok has served the same soup for more than four decades. Not the same recipe, the same soup. Every night at Wattana Panich, the leftover broth of the kway teow beef noodle soup is removed from the Jacuzzi-sized wok in the center of the kitchen and filtered. The chunks and particles are discarded, the broth is refrigerated, and the next morning the leftover broth is used as the mother of that day’s kway teow. This type of dish, and the method behind it, is sometimes called perpetual stew. The idea is that every day the stew/soup/broth/stock, depending on the exact ingredients, gets eaten, added to, and heated. Perpetual stew makes use of the fact that extended heating can extract nutrients from food, while keeping it sterile and safe to eat. In some ways, perpetual stew resembles the sourdough starters that bakers adopt into their families and use for years, sometimes naming their starters and even assigning them a gender. But while a starter must be painstakingly maintained, a perpetual stew is rekilled every day in the bubbling cauldron. Nonetheless, that dead elixir has the ability to breathe life into any savory dish you could imagine. Use it to cook rice, deglaze a pan, add subtle complexity to a pasta sauce. And of course, when you have perpetual stew you always have soup at a moment’s notice. Add some nonscrap carrots, cut into bite sized chunks, some pieces of celery, an onion cut in half, some potatoes, maybe some meat. Eat what you wish of the soup, and let the rest of the veggies cook into the broth, to be strained later. If you happen to go through a lot of onions, carrots and celery, it may be possible to keep your perpetual broth going solely from scraps, without spending any money. If you can feed it a few bones once in a while, all the better. A vegetarian broth can have great flavor, but you won’t feel it in your own bones the way you can feel a bone broth. Any kind of animal part, bones, meat and

everything in between, will help. The next most important ingredient is some kind of tomato product, which adds acid and umami. Any undrunk wine can be added, as can most roots, including the peels, taproots and stems. Leftovers can be added as well, on a case-by-case basis. Be careful to avoid ingredients that will swing the flavor of the broth in an irreversible way. Strong flavored ingredients like kim chi, blue cheese or anything that might be described as “an acquired taste” probably won’t help. If you are into aromatics like ginger or lemongrass, the unused peels and ends can be added. Nuts and beans will leave a lasting impression, but the stock itself can and should be used in cooking beans or lentils. Just don’t add those leftovers back to the perpetual stock pot. Fish and seafood scraps, including crab and lobster shells, can be used, as long as you don’t mind a house that smells like boiled fish parts. Remember, you aren’t here to make soup. You are making your regularly scheduled meal, while at the same time you’re maintaining perpetual stew. Over time, the perpetual stew becomes a record of meals cooked. The leftover potatoes, drenched in chicken fat may contain particles from Sunday dinner, the ginger and scallion scraps recall a recent batch of congee. The most subjective part of perpetual stew is the degree to which the fat is skimmed. It depends on the type of fat in the pot and the personal preferences of your target audience – you should aim to please the least fat-tolerant. Chicken and pork fat tend to be appreciated more than lamb or wild game. If it has fat (and salt), it’s considered broth. If the broth has chunks, it’s a soup or stew. Without fat and salt (and chunks) it’s stock, which is more versatile but needs seasoning before serving. I prefer my perpetual stew at the stock end of the spectrum, so I skim that fat. It can always be added later, at serving time, preferably in the form of mayonnaise. At Wattana Panich, they strain the soup in the evening, after the close. I recommend doing the same. Turn it off early enough that you give it time to cool,

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16 n Jan. 3, 2019

telegraph

then strain and refrigerate the liquid portion. The next morning, the fat will have gathered at the top and be easy to skim. Then you would have stock, which has the least flavor and the most possibility. You may ask, why not leave the onions and carrots and all the chunks in the pot forever, and let them continue to contribute more of their flavor and nutrients? The answer is that they have already given all they have to give and have nothing left. Even meat will eventually give up the ghost. The bones, however, will keep giving. So you can pick them out and put them back in the pot a few times. And taste the meat and use your judgement. If it tastes good, put it back in. If it tastes like cardboard, give it to the chickens. At some point in the day, I will take out the stock and begin adding the day’s accumulated scraps, diluting as necessary with water. My attempts at perpetual stew have not withstood the tests of time. It might get to a week of age before a cold day when a lot of people want soup and it’s gone. So I am perpetually making temporary stew. That’s good enough for me. Here is how I ran out last time: this recipe is for cháo, a Vietnamese version of congee, a simple, rice-based porridge common across Asia. This recipe for the Vietnamese version called cháo comes from the Queen of Vietnamese food, cookbook author Andrea Nguyen. Warm, soft and saturated with flavor, it is about as comforting as a food can get. Cháo Serves 4 ¾ cup rice 1-inch cube of ginger, cut into slabs (peels can go into the Perpetual Potion) 3 green onions, just the white part, with roots and greens reserved for the stock pot. 2 ½ quarts chicken stock Put rice in a 4-quart pot and fill pot with water. Swash the rice around with your fingers. When the rice settles, pour off the water. Repeat. Add stock, ginger and green onion to the pot. Bring to a boil over high heat, then partially cover and reduce to a vigorous simmer for five minutes, during which time, as Nguyen describes it, the rice “... should bounce in the bubbling water without the water boiling over the pan sides.” Stir, to ensure none of the rice has stuck to the bottom, and reduce to a gentle simmer, covered, for about an hour, “... or until the rice grains have bloomed and curled, releasing their starches to thicken the soup and turn it creamy white.” Then, let cool, spoon into bowls and “cháo” down. n


TopShelf

Human sacrifices, ComicCan and unicorns by Chris Aaland

N

ew Year’s Eve just doesn’t seem as wild as it did a decade or more ago. Gone are the days of slamming Jägermeister shots or powering through Das Boot filled with Zima and Goldschläger. Come to think of it, how come so many trendy douchebag liquors have umlauts in their names? Monday night found me sitting in front of the fireplace as the snow piled up outside my house. Opening faceoff of the Avalanche/Kings game was minutes away, so I grabbed a bomber of Steamworks’ Spruce Goose out of the beer fridge. I’d been saving it for a snowy day, and the fragrant scent and bitter finish of the spruce tips wafted out my nose with each sip. At 7.9 percent ABV, it jump-started my evening much more quickly than the Avs’ flailing power play. Next up was the last leftover growler of BREW from the KSUT holiday party ... 64 oz. of Idris, a toasty, malty, crisp amber ale. That’s four pints in layman’s terms. Fortunately, his ABV was just 4.5 percent. By the time I pulled my last sip, the Avs had fallen 3-2 in overtime. I still had hours to go until the clock struck midnight and finished with a couple of canned beers from some of my favorite western breweries: Avery IPA, which ranks highly in most national rankings of that particular style; and Melvin’s Hey Zeus! Mexican logger, finished with a fat squeeze from a lime wedge. Six hours. Eight beers. I wouldn’t have a hangover, would I? 7:45 a.m. came quickly. It felt like someone had struck me between the eyes with an ice pick and my mouth was as dry as could be. During the night, I’d slammed a couple of Nalgene bottles worth of water but was as parched as the Sonoran Desert when I stumbled into the kitchen. New Year’s Day means cooking around the Aaland household. In some years, it’s black-eyed peas with ham hocks. Other years is a bean and ham soup. 2019 called for posole rojo. I stocked up over the weekend on dried hominy, red chile pods, onions, garlic and a big pork shoulder roast. I was sober enough to remember to soak the hominy in water overnight. After cooking a breakfast of sausage, potatoes, fried eggs and green chile, I retired to the sofa to research traditional New Mexican recipes for posole. The joy of the internet is bouncing from one stream of thought to the next … hangovers help with such random searches. Pozole, as it’s usually spelled in Mexico, is derived from the Nahuatl language, meaning “frothy soup.” The ancient Aztecs boiled meat and hominy from the sacred maize plant with dried chiles and herbs. The preferred meat was the human flesh of prisoners, recently sacrificed by having their beating hearts ripped from their bodies at least according to the internet). It made sense in a macabre sort of way, since the Aztecs believed the gods created humans from masa. Since the Conquest banned cannibalism, human flesh was replaced with pork – a favorite of the Spanish conquistadors. Other European ingredients like garlic and onions were added,

and the stew evolved into what we now know as posole here in the American Southwest. Three varieties are popular in Mexico and adjacent regions: blanco, verde and rojo. In New Mexico, rojo is king. Posole is a tedious dish when cooked authentically. The chile pods must be rinsed and seeded, reconstituted in boiling water, fried with garlic in lard or bacon fat, and blended until fine. The pork shoulder gets cut into bite-size cubes and browned, then added to the red chile and water. Next, onions and garlic are sautéed and added. Spices like bay leaves, cumin, Mexican oregano, garlic powder and onion powder find their way into the mix. My secret ingredients are beef and chicken bouillon and a fat tablespoon of molasses for balance. The main ingredient is time. Reduce heat from boiling to a simmer and let sit all day long on the burner. The finished product killed the hangover like so many sacrificial prisoners. Best of all, good luck for another year is on its way. New year, new beer! Snowdown is a month away, so the time has come for our friends at Ska to release the official 41st annual Snowdown beer, ComicCan. Technically speaking, it’s the 24th official Snowdown beer. The first 17 years of Snowdown didn’t have an official beer because the craft brewing craze wasn’t a thing yet. Back in the ’80s, we had to rely on Coors Light and powder drugs to weather Snowdown … or so I’m told. The style of this year’s beer is a mystery, with the big reveal at 5 p.m. Friday at the World Headquarters. Costumes are encouraged at the jovial affair. The theme of Snowdown 2019 is “Get Your ComicON!” Durango’s annual winter bacchanal runs from Wed., Jan. 30 through Sun., Feb. 3. But why stop at one new beer? After all, this isn’t Utah! Steamworks taps its January firkin at 3 p.m. Friday when it rolls out barrels of My Other Car Is a Unicorn at both its downtown brewpub and the beach at Purgy’s. “We’ve jumped on board with the latest trend in IPAs by brewing a New England or ‘juicy/hazy’ style IPA,” head brewer Ken Martin said. “These beers have a lower perceived bitterness than traditional IPAs, but are heavy-handed in the flavor and aroma hops. The hop varieties used are known for lending tropical fruit flavors and aromas to the beer rather than the usual citrusy or spicy/piney characteristics.” Complementing the hops is an unusual accomplice. “We added a mango puree to each of the New England IPA firkins, and we’re hoping for a tropical fruit delight in the dead of winter,” Martin’s partner-in-crime, Spencer Roper, said. Don’t get bent out of shape from 6-8 p.m. Friday when you can’t find a seat at Durango Craft Spirits. That’s because the Badly Bent duo of Patrick Dressen & Mark Epstein will hold court. More than a decade ago, Durango’s premier bluegrass quintet won the Telluride Bluegrass band competition. Dressen and Epstein were driving forces in the classic version of the Badly Bent that produced a couple of CDs and got to perform on the mainstage before nearly 10,000 fans. He came dancing across the water? Email me at chrisa@gobrainstorm.net.n

telegraph

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onthetown

Thursday03 Never Summer Demo Day, 9 a.m.-3 p.m., event also runs Jan. 4, Purgatory Resort. www.purgatoryresort.com. Beginner Tai Chi, 9:15 a.m., Durango Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave. Baby Meetup with Durango Café au Play, 9:30-11:30 a.m., 2307 Columbine. durangocafeauplay.org. Baby Meetup, 9:30-11:30 a.m., Columbine House at Unitarian Universalist Fellowship, 419 San Juan Dr.

Free yoga, 8:30-9:30 a.m., Lively Boutique, 809 Main Ave. Zumba Gold, 9:30-10:15 a.m., La Plata Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave. Groove & Grow, 10 a.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield.

Career and Tech Support, 10-11 a.m. and 5-6 p.m., Ignacio Library. 563-9287.

Open Art Studio, 10 a.m., Ignacio Community Library.

“Boy Erased,” feature film 1:15, 3:30, 5:45 and 8 p.m., Animas City Theatre.

Intermediate Tai Chi, 10-11 a.m., Durango Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave.

Toddler Storytime, for ages 2-3, 10:30 a.m., Durango Public Library. Lunch with an Author, featuring Brooke Smith, author of The Mango Tree, noon, Ignacio Library. Less Jargon, More eBooks & Audiobooks, 1-5 p.m., Ignacio Library. 563-9287.

Submit “On the Town” items by Monday at noon to: calendar@durangotelegraph.com

Durango Early Bird Toastmasters, 7-8:30 a.m., LPEA, 45 Stewart St. 769-7615.

Kidz Klub for elementary school kids, 4 p.m., Ignacio Library. “Doc Swords,” PTSD Social Club for Veterans, 4-6 p.m., VFW, 1550 Main Ave. Lacey Black performs, 5-7 p.m., Ska Brewing, 225 Girard St. Sitting Meditation, 5:30-6:15 p.m., Durango Dharma Center, 1800 E. 3rd Ave. Powerhouse Pub Trivia, 6:30-8:30 p.m., Powerhouse Science Center, 1333 Camino del Rio. www.powsci.org. Community Acoustic Music Jam, 7 p.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield. Open Mic & Stand-Up, 8 p.m., El Rancho Tavern, 975 Main Ave. Karaoke, 8 p.m.-close, Wild Horse Saloon, 601 E. 2nd Ave.

Friday04 USASA Snowboard Slalom & Giant Slalom Races, Jan. 4-6, Upper Hades, Purgatory Resort.

Science Fridays, in partnership with Powerhouse Science Center and Montezuma School to Farm Project. Kindergarten-3rd graders, 10-11 a.m.; 4th-5th graders, 11 a.m.noon, Mancos Public Library. Lactation Support, 10 a.m.noon, Prenatal Yoga, noon-1 p.m., Durango Café au Play, 1309 E. 3rd Ave., Room 201. 749-9607 or durangocafeauplay.org. Preschool Storytime, 10:3011 a.m., Durango Public Library.

Triple threat: Twilight Race Series returns to Purg What: Twilight Race Series for fat

bike, Nordic and snowshoe When: 6 p.m. Wednesday nights, Jan. 9, 16, 23 & 30 Where: Base of Purgatory Find out who the true kings and queens of the mountain are as the multisport, short-track Twilight Race Series returns to Purgatory on Wed., Jan. 9. Racers will battle it out in the dark, up and down punishing terrain in a variety of winter disciplines, including Nordic skiing, snow shoeing and fat biking. The

Firkin Fridays, featuring “My Other Car is a Unicorn” on tap, 3 p.m., Steamworks Brewing, 801 E. 2nd Ave., and The Beach at Purgatory Resort. 259-9200.

final race in the series – on Jan. 30, the opening night of Snowdown – will be a special “triathlon” format where racers can sign up as individuals or throw their name in a hat to be matched up with others on a team. Cost is just $10/race and sign up takes place from 5 – 5:45 p.m. at Purgy’s. A limited number of fat bikes and snowshoes are available free of charge, and headlamps are mandatory. Racing will be followed by drinks, prizes and epic war stories. Twilight Nights is brought to you by the Durango Nordic Center and McDonald’s.

Family First Friday: Stone Soup and Storytelling, 7 p.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield. Blue Lotus Feet Kirtan, 7:30-9:30 p.m., YogaDurango, Florida Road.

Spanish Speaking Parents & Littles Fridays, 3:30-5:30 p.m., Durango Café au Play, 1309 E. 3rd Ave., Room 201. durangocafeauplay.org.

Saturday05

41st annual Snowdown Beer, “ComicCan,” tapping, 5 p.m., Ska Brewing, 225 Girard St.

Pagosa Springs Fall Creek Double Skiathlon, part of the Southwest Nordic Race Series, Pagosa Springs. www.durangonordic.org.

Open Mic 5:30-8 p.m., sign up noon-4 p.m.; Smiley Cafe, 1309 E. 3rd Ave. Sign up at 403-5572. MakerLab Maker Mingle, 6-9 p.m., Powerhouse Science Center, 1333 Camino del Rio. www.powsci.org. Funk Jam with Bootyconda, 6-9 p.m., Kaztro performs, 9 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Rosca de Reyes (King Cake) Community Celebration, featuring yoga, zumba, live music and more, 9 a.m.-noon, Animas Valley Grange, 7271 CR 203. rachel@goodfoodcollective.org. ICL MakerSpace, 10 a.m., Ignacio Library. VFW Indoor Flea Market, 10 a.m.-4 p.m., 1550 Main Ave. 247-0384. 4

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18 n Jan. 3, 2019

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Ben Gibson Band, 7 p.m., Ernie’s 11th Street Station.

Tree Hotel, 501 Camino del Rio. theclubdems@gmail.com.

Teen Café, 7-10 p.m., Mancos Public Library. 533-7600.

ICL Knitters, 1 p.m., Inklings, for grades 3-5, 4-5 p.m., Ignacio Library.

Comedy Cocktail open mic stand up, 8 p.m., Eno Wine Bar, 723 E. 2nd Ave.

Sunday06

Veterans Breakfast, 9-11 a.m., event also runs Jan. 20, Elks Club, 901 E. 2nd Ave. 946-4831. MakerSpace, 11 a.m., Ignacio Library.

Free Book Giveaway, hosted by Durango Book Rescue, noon-4 p.m., 923 Narrow Gauge Ave.

Traditional Irish Music Jam, 12:30-4 p.m., Irish Embassy, 900 Main Ave.

Baby Storytime, 2-2:30 p.m., Durango Public Library. Code Club, computer programming skills, also runs Wednesdays, 3 p.m., Crazy 8s Math Club for Grades K-2, 3:30 p.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield. Rotary Club of Durango, presentation from Dave Woodruff with the Colorado Restaurant Association, 6 p.m., Strater Hotel. 385-7899. Super Ted’s Super Trivia, 6:12 p.m., Henry Strater Theatre, 699 Main Ave.

Writers’ Workshop, 2 p.m., event also runs Jan. 20, Ignacio Community Library.

Know Before You Go: Free avalanche awareness talk with Colorado Avalanche Information Center’s Blayne Woods, 6:30-8 p.m., Backcountry Experience, 1205 Camino del Rio.

Blue Moon Ramblers, 7 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave.

The Trivia Factory, hosted by Ben Bernstein, 6:30-8:30 p.m., The Roost, 128 E. College Drive.

Monday07

Latin Social Nights, 8-11 p.m., Wild Horse Saloon, 601 E. 2nd Ave. 375-2568.

Morning Meditation, 8 a.m., Groove & Grow, 10:30 a.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield.

Yoga Storytime, 9:30-10:45 a.m., Smiley Building Studio 10, 1309 E. 3rd Ave.

Watch Your Step class, 10:15 a.m., Durango Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave.

Monday Music, 10:30 a.m., Durango Café au Play, 1309 E. 3rd Ave., Room 201. durangocafeauplay.org.

Creative Asset Working Group meets, part of the Creative District initiative, 1-2:15 p.m., Durango Public Library. Register at colleen.obrien@durangogov.org.

Mindful Monday, free one-hour yoga, 5:30 p.m., Crow’s Closet, 750 Main Ave. Trivia Night, 7 p.m., Blondies in Cortez.

Wednesday09 Storytime, 10 a.m., Ignacio Library. 563-9287. Intermediate Tai Chi, 10:30 a.m., Durango Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave. Little Readers, 10:30 a.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield. Fired Up Stories, 10:30-11:30 a.m., Durango Public Library. 375-3384. Free Trauma Conscious Yoga for Veterans and Families, noon-1 p.m., Elks Lodge, 901 E. 2nd Ave. “Living Wages – More Than Just the Right Thing to Do,” Green Business Roundtable, noon-1 p.m., Henry Strater Theater, 699 Main Ave. Register at 259-3583. Teen Café, for grades 6-12, and MakerSpace, 2 p.m., Ignacio Library.

Tuesday08 Storytime, 10:30-11:30 a.m., Mancos Public Library.

Bookmarks Book Discussion featuring Pachinko by Min Jin Lee, 2 p.m., Crazy 8s Math Club for Grades 3-5, 3:30 p.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield.

“A Best First Step to Address Climate Change,” La Plata Dems on the Move luncheon, noon-1 p.m., Double

Tween Time: DIY Handwarmers, 4-5 p.m., Durango Public Library. 375-3384.

Yoga for All, 10 a.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield.

Thank the Veterans potluck, Peter Neds and Glenn Keefe perform, 5:30-8:30 p.m., VFW, 1550 Main Ave. Breaking Up With Sugar with dietitian and nutritionist Fran Sutherlin, 6 p.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield. McDonald’s Twilight Nights Races, for skiers, fat bikers and snowshoers, 6 p.m., event also runs Jan. 16, 23 and 30, Purgatory. www.durangonordic.org. Heartbeat Durango, support group for individuals affected by suicide, 6-8 p.m., La Plata County Fairgrounds, look for the Heartbeat sign. 749-1673. Geeks Who Drink Trivia, 6:30 p.m., BREW Pub & Kitchen, 117 W. College Dr. 259-5959. San Juan Basin Archaeological Society meets, presentation by Chuck Riggs on work at the Bowthorpe Site, 7 p.m., Center of Southwest Studies at Fort Lewis College. sjbas.org. “The Landing of the Mary Jane,” opening reception, 7-8:30 p.m., Durango & Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad & Museum. www.durangotrain.com. Karaoke, 8 p.m., Blondies in Cortez. Karaoke with Crazy Charlie, 8 p.m.-close, Wild Horse Saloon, 601 E. 2nd Ave.

Ongoing Winter Art Show, supporting Local First, thru Jan. 31, Smiley Building, 1309 E. 3rd Ave. After-school program for 1st-5th grade, 4:15-5:15 p.m. Wednesdays, Mancos Library. Free Morning Yoga with YogaDurango, 8:30-9:30 a.m., Saturdays and Sundays, Durango Mountain Institute at Purgatory. Live music, nightly, Diamond Belle & The Office. Karaoke, 8 p.m., Thur-Sun, 8th Ave. Tavern, 509 8th Ave.

Upcoming La Plata Quilters Guild, 6 p.m., Jan. 10, La Plata County Fairgrounds. 799-1632. Supersuckers perform, 9 p.m., Jan. 11, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr. www.animascitytheatre.com.

More “On the Town” p. 204

Happy New Year from all of us at Animas Trading Co. Check out our new location at 742 Main Ave. for warm and fuzzy hats, gloves and scarves, fun socks, and Snowdown costumes.

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Jan. 3, 2019 n 19



AskRachel Interesting fact: John Hughes wrote so many movies, and yet he wrote more than you ever realized. His worse efforts, like those Beethoven the dog films, were penned under his Edmond Dantes pseudonym. No one’s clamoring for a remake of those. Dear Rachel, With all the remakes and sequels getting made, I’m wondering when we’ll start to see the slate of John Hughes remakes. I’ve started to realize that dude had his hands on every ’80s movie ever made. And even if this is sacrilegious, let’s be honest … a lot of his work is due for an update. I mean, you can’t even watch “16 Candles” in public anymore, between the overt racism and the date raping. - Hughes With Me? Dear Retread, You also can’t watch “16 Candles” in public anymore because of copyright laws regarding public performances of commercial works. But your point stands. I recently rewatched “16 Candles” for the first time in a lot of years, and I think I understand why women experience such a constant mind-f—. We grew up on this crap! Rather than remaking them all, let’s just let them fade into the sunset. Except for “Home Alone.” That was Hughes’ finest hour. – Thirsty for more, Rachel Dear Rachel, I can’t be the only one who received gifts I’ll never wear, never use and never want to see again. Is there a statute of limitations on these things? Like, do I need to ensure that the giftgiver sees me wearing these stupid shirts at least

OntheTown

once before I can drop them at the thrift store or try to return them without tags or receipts? Or can I just clear out my life now and start the new year fresh? – Ungrateful Bastard Dear White Elephant, As the gift-givee, you have full ownership of whatever you received. I say clear it out now, or else it’ll become one with the back of your closet, and you’ll be stuck with it the next time you move. Unless, of course, these gifts are distinctive, like a hand-embroidered poncho from your Aunt Petunia. Then you have to be careful not to take it to the same thrift store she frequents. You might even have to donate it out of town. – On the road again, Rachel Dear Rachel, I dislike New Year’s resolutions. The new year is a totally Email Rachel at telegraph@durangotelegraph.com arbitrary time to decide to Dear Deep Thinker, change your life, and the resolutions never stick. You say you want no resolution? Well, you know, we The only resolution I want to make is not to don’t all want to change the world. You tell me that it’s no make any resolutions. But in sticking to my ressolution? Well, you know, we don’t all want to change the olution, I’ve already broken my resolve not to world. But when you talk about deconstruction, don’t you have any resolutions. The paradox is making me know that you can count me out. Don’t you know it’s start to question my own existence. And that’s gonna be all right, all right, all right. Now, if you got a real no way to start a new year. Help! solution, well, you know, we’d all love to see the plan. – Philosophically Quandaried – I can make remakes too, Rachel Teen Game Night, 7-10 p.m., Jan. 18, Mancos Library.

An Evening with Chris Robinson Brotherhood, doors open, 8:30 p.m., show begins, 9:30 p.m., Feb. 3, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr.

from p. 19

Kirtan, 6-8 p.m., Jan. 19, Studio 10, Smiley Building, 1309 E. 3rd Ave.

Coke Series Nordic Races, Race 2, for skiers, snowshoers and fat bikers, 10 a.m., Jan. 12, Durango Nordic Center; Race 3, for skiers and snowshoers, 8 a.m., March 10, top of Purgatory. www.durangonordic.org.

Nappy Roots, 8 p.m., Jan. 20, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr. www.animascitytheatre.com.

“The Pump and Dump Show: Parentally Incorrect,” 7:30 p.m., Feb. 6, Community Concert Hall. www.durangoconcerts.com.

“Les Ballets Trocadero de Monte Carlo,” 7:30 p.m., Jan. 22, Community Concert Hall. durangoconcerts.com.

Silverton Whiteout 10-Hour Fat Bike Race, Feb. 910, downtown Silverton.

The Green performs 8 p.m., Jan. 23, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr.. www.animascitytheare.com

An Evening with Keller Williams, doors open, 8 p.m., show begins, 9 p.m., Feb. 16, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr. www.animascitytheatre.com.

The Met: Live in HD, featuring Cilea’s “Adriana Lecouvreur,” 10:55 a.m., Jan. 12, Student Union at FLC. www.du rangoconcerts.com. Children’s Author Visit with Brooke Smith, author of The Mango Tree, 1 p.m., Jan. 12, Mancos Public Library. The Magic Beans and Kitchen Dwellers, 8:30 p.m., Jan. 13, Animas City Theatre. www.animascitytheatre.com. Full Moon Howler, featuring bonfire, s’mores, refreshments and presentation by Durango Nature Studies, 5:30 p.m., Jan. 18, Durango Nordic Center. durangonordic.org. “Friends: The Musical Parody,” 7:30 p.m., Jan. 16, Community Concert Hall. www.durangoconcerts.com. “Durango Rocks,” annual Chamber of Commerce awards, musical performance, 5:30 p.m., Jan. 17, Community Concert Hall. www.durangoconcerts.com.

“The Second City,” comedy troupe, 7:30 p.m., Jan. 24, Community Concert Hall. www.durangoconcerts.com. National Theatre Live Productions presents “Antony & Cleopatra,” 11 a.m., Jan. 26, also shows 1 p.m., Feb. 24, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr. animascitytheatre.com. Head for the Hills and the Sweet Lillies perform, 9:30 p.m., Jan. 26, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr. animascitytheatre.com. www.animascitytheare.com Tomorrow’s Bad Seeds perform, 9:30 p.m., Jan. 26, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr. animascitytheare.com

Russ Liquid with FunkStatik, 9 p.m., Jan. 17, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr. animascitytheatre.com.

National Theatre Live Productions presents “The Madness of George III,” 1 p.m., Jan. 27, also shows 11 a.m., Feb. 9, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr. www.animascitytheatre.com.

Papadosio, 9:30 p.m., Jan. 18-19, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr. www.animascitytheatre.com.

Snowdown 2019: Get Your ComicOn, Jan. 30-Feb. 3. www.snowdown.org.

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The Pine Needle Langlauf, part of the Southwest Nordic Race Series, Feb. 23, Durango. durangonordic.org. National Theatre Live Productions presents screening of “I’m Not Running,” 11 a.m., Feb. 23, also shows 1 p.m., April 7, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr.

Deadline for “On the Town” submissions is Monday at noon. To submit an item, email: calendar@durango telegraph.com


FreeWillAstrology by Rob Brezsny ARIES (March 21-April 19): No one has resisted the force of gravity with more focus than businessman Roger Babson (1875–1967). He wrote an essay entitled “Gravity – Our Enemy Number One,” and sought to develop anti-gravity technology. His Gravity Research Foundation gave awards to authentic scientists who advanced the understanding of gravity. If that organization still existed and offered prizes, I’m sure that researchers of the Aries persuasion would win them all in 2019. For your tribe, the coming months should feature lots of escapes from heaviness, including soaring flights and playful levity and lofty epiphanies.

other way to get on life’s good side: cultivate duties that consistently encourage you to act out of love and joy rather than out of guilt and obligation. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Here are four key questions I hope you’ll meditate on throughout 2019: 1. What is love? 2. What kind of love do you want to receive? 3. What kind of love do you want to give? 4. How could you transform yourself in order to give and receive more of the love you value most? To spur your efforts, I offer you these thoughts from teacher David R. Hawkins: “Love is misunderstood to be an emotion; actually, it is a state of awareness, a way of being in the world, a way of seeing oneself and others.”

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): The night parrots of Australia are so elusive that there was a nearly six-decade stretch when no human saw a single member of the species. But in 2013, after searching for 15 years, photographer John Young spotted one and recorded a 17-second video. Since then, more sightings have occurred. According to my astrological vision, your life in 2019 will feature experiences akin to the story of the night parrot’s reappearance. A major riddle will be at least partially solved. Hidden beauty will materialize. Long-secret phenomena will no longer be secret. A missing link will re-emerge.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “Most living things begin in the absence of light,” writes Virgo author Nancy Holder. “The vine is rooted in the earth; the fawn takes form in the womb of the doe.” I’ll remind you that your original gestation also took place in the dark. And I foresee a metaphorically comparable process unfolding for you in 2019. You’ll undergo an incubation period that may feel cloaked and mysterious. That’s just as it should be: the best possible circumstances for the vital new part of your life that will be growing. So be patient. You’ll see the tangible results in 2020.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Millions of years ago, Europe, Asia, Africa, Australia, Antarctica and North and South America were smooshed together. Earth had a single land mass, the supercontinent Pangea. Stretching across its breadth was a colossal feature, the Central Pangean Mountains. Eventually, though, Europe and America split apart, making room for the Atlantic Ocean and dividing the Central Pangean range. Today the Scottish Highlands and the Appalachian Mountains are thousands of miles apart, but once upon a time they were joined. In 2019, Gemini, I propose that you look for metaphorical equivalents in your own life. What disparate parts of your world had the same origin? What elements that are now divided used to be together? Re-establish their connection. Get them back in touch with each other. Be a specialist in cultivating unity.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Many plants that modern Americans regard as weeds were regarded as tasty food by Native Americans. A prime example is the cattail, which grows wild in wetlands. Indigenous people ate the rootstock, stem, leaves and flower spike. I propose that we use this scenario to serve as a metaphor for some of your potential opportunities in 2019. Things you’ve regarded as useless or irrelevant or inconvenient could be revealed as assets. Be alert for the possibility of such shifts. Here’s advice from Ralph Waldo Emerson: “What is a weed? A plant whose virtues have not yet been discovered.”

CANCER (June 21-July 22): 2019 will be an excellent time to swim in unpolluted rivers, utter sacred oaths near beautiful fountains and enjoy leisurely saunas that help purify your mind and body. You are also likely to attract cosmic favor if you cry more than usual, seek experiences that enhance your emotional intelligence and ensure that your head respectfully consults with your heart before making decisions. Here’s an-

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The slow, gradual, incremental approach will be your magic strategy in 2019. Being persistent and thorough as you take one step at a time will provide you with the power to accomplish wonders. Now and then, you may be tempted to seek dramatic breakthroughs or flashy leaps of faith; and there may indeed be one or two such events mixed in with your steady rhythms. But for the most part, your glory will come through tenacity. Now study this advice from mystic Meister Eckhart: “Wisdom consists in doing the next thing you have to do, doing it with your whole heart and finding delight in doing it.”

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22Dec. 21): Sagittarian polymath Piet Hein wrote a poem in which he named the central riddle of his existence. “A bit beyond perception’s reach, / I sometimes believe I see / That life is two locked boxes / Each containing the other’s key.” I propose that we adopt this scenario to symbolize one of the central riddles of your existence. I’ll go further and speculate that in 2019 one of those boxes will open as if through a magical fluke, without a need for the key. This mysterious blessing won’t really be a magical fluke, but rather a stroke of well-deserved and hard-earned luck that is the result of the work you’ve been doing to transform and improve yourself. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): What themes and instruments do people least want to hear in a piece of music? Composer Dave Solder determined that the worst song ever made would contain bagpipes, cowboy music, tubas, advertising jingles, operatic rapping & children crooning about holidays. Then he collaborated with other musicians to record such a song. I suspect that as you head into 2019, it’ll be helpful to imagine a metaphorically comparable monstrosity: a fantastic mess that sums up all the influences you’d like to avoid. With that as a vivid symbol, you’ll hopefully be inspired to avoid allowing any of it into your life in the coming months. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): In Canada, it’s illegal to pretend to practice witchcraft. It’s fine to actually do witchcraft, however. With that as our inspiration, I advise you to be rigorous about embodying your authentic self in 2019. Make sure you never lapse into merely imitating who you are or who you used to be. Don’t fall into the trap of caring more about your image than about your actual output. Focus on standing up for what you really mean rather than what you imagine people expect from you. The coming months will be a time when you can summon pure and authoritative expressions of your kaleidoscopic soul. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): In the 18th century, Benjamin Franklin was a Founding Father who played a key role in getting the United States up and running. He wasn’t happy that the fledgling nation chose the bald eagle as its animal symbol. The supposedly majestic raptor is lazy, he wrote. It doesn’t hunt for its own food but steals grub obtained by smaller birds of prey. Furthermore, bald eagles are cowardly, Franklin believed. Even sparrows may intimidate them. With that as our theme, Pisces, I invite you to select a proper creature to be your symbolic ally in 2019. Since you will be building a new system and establishing a fresh power base, you shouldn’t pick a critter that’s merely glamorous. Choose one that excites your ambition and animates your willpower.

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Jan. 3, 2019 n 21


classifieds

Deadline for Telegraph classified ads is Tuesday at noon. Ads are a bargain at 10 cents a character with a $5 minimum. Even better, ads can now be placed online: durangotelegraph.com. Prepayment is required via cash, credit card or check. (Sorry, no refunds or substitutions.)

Ads can be submitted via: n classifieds@durango telegraph.com n 970-259-0133 n 777 Main Ave., #214 Approximate office hours: Mon., 9ish - 5ish Tues., 9ish - 5ish Wed., 9ish - 3ish Thurs., On delivery Fri., 10:30ish - 2ish please call ahead: 259-0133.

Announcements

Classes/Workshops Salsa Dance Classes Start your New Year on the right feet, and learn to dance Salsa in 6 weeks! Starting Tuesday, January 8th at the Wild Horse Saloon, Beginners Classes from 78pm, followed by social dancing open to the public. No partner required, all are welcome! Contact salsadancedurango@ gmail.com or 970-317-0742 to reserve your spot NOW—see you on the dance floor! Body Rolling for Digestion Yamuna Body Rolling Workshop focusing on digestion & weight loss January 13th. www.durangobodyrolling.com

Live Old Time Music Dance Party Free Six Dollar String Band dance party and concert features a square dance fashion show (models needed) refreshments and easy square dance lesson with Caller Carla Roberts and the Wild West Squares. Be exuberant for the New Year! Call 970903-6478 for more info on this event and new classes in January. The Perfect Gift for your favorite dirtbag. Literature from Durango’s own Benighted Publications. The Climbing Zine, The Great American Dirtbags, American Climber, Climbing Out of Bed and Graduating From College Me are available at: Maria’s Bookshop, Pine Needle Mountaineering, the Sky Store, or on at www.climbingzine.com.

Wanted Turn Vehicles, Copper, Alum, Etc. Into Cash! at RJ Metal Recycle, also free appliance and other metal drop off. 970-259-3494.

HelpWanted 6th Street Liquors Hiring 6th Street Liquors at 273 E. College Dr. is hiring. Part time & full time evening shifts avail. Shifts are from 5pm-12am. Come in for an interview between 9:30am-4:00pm Mon-Fri with resume or drop off resume. Please, no calls

22 n Jan. 3, 2019

New Session of Yoga Classes Starting January 7. For students of all levels with Kathy Curran. Drop Ins Welcome! Smiley Building, Room #32. 2594794. www.4cornersyoga.com Yoga for Cancer Looking for 3 clients to participate in 6 Yoga for Cancer sessions, late Januarymid March 2019. $15/session, sliding scale offered. For details contact Emily at 615-556-5951 or apanatherapeutics@ gmail.com. Mommy and Me Dance Class Come join the fun! Now registering for classes. Call 970-749-6456. mommyandmedance.com.

Services House Keeper Professional, detailed, reliable, local references Barbara 516-480-8343 Harmony Organizing and Cleaning Services Home and office 970-403-6192 Organic Spray Tans! Glow for the New Year! Meg Bush, LMT 970-759-0199 Low Price on Storage! Inside/outside near Durango, RJ Mini Storage. 970-259-3494 Advanced Duct Cleaning Air duct cleaning specializing in dryer

telegraph

vents. Improves indoor air quality; reduces dust and allergens. 970-247-2462 www.advancedductcleaninginc.com

BodyWork Massage by Cindi Sheridan! I am very perceptive/receptive to each client’s specific needs & will schedule on wknds & early eves. Post holiday special! Phone 769-2048! massageintervention.life Voted best massage in Durango 2018. Couples, sauna, outdoor shower, cupping. Reviews on FB + Yelp. 970-903-2984 Massage Gift Certificates! 30, 60 & 90 min Meg Bush, LMT 970759-0199 Massage with Kathryn 20+ years experience offering a fusion of esalen style, deep tissue massage with therapeutic stretching & Acutonics. New clients receive $5 off first session. To schedule appt. call 970-201-3373.

Services Radon Services Free radon testing and consultation. Call Colorado Radon Abatement and Detection for details. 970- 946-1618.

ForRent House in Town 4 bedroom, 2 bath house in nice neighborhood for rent. No pets, smokers, partiers. Available mid January. $1750 per month plus deposit. 759-0254.

CommercialforRent Cute Office to Share Office available weekdays until 4pm. Set up well for therapist or health consultant. 1911 Main Ave, Suite 240. $190 per month. 946-1345.

RoommateWanted Male Roommate Wanted Male roommate to share quiet house in town. No smokers, parties. $550 per month, $600 refundable deposit, $50 cleaning fee non-refundable. 759-0254.

HaikuMovieReview ‘Bird Box’ ‘The Walking Dead’, ‘The River Wild’, and ‘Sophie’s Choice’, all in one box – Lainie Maxson

ISO Prof. Female Furn. 1 BR on the Animas. No smking/pets. $600/mo. incl. util. https://bit.ly/2Ljezw4. 749-8327.

ForSale AKC Australian Puppies For Sale Ready Jan. 13th Call (970) 884-2715 Reruns – Two Stores to Choose From The New Year is here! Beautiful new arrivals – Three matched tile-topped tables, console tables & desks. Lots of new cool stuff and daily markdowns. 572 E. 6th Ave. 385-7336.

CommunityService Christmas Tree Recycling Christmas trees can be recycled at Santa Rita Park thru Jan. 30. There is no curbside pick-up of Christmas trees. Residents may drop off their natural trees, free of ornaments and tinsel, at the dropoff site near the large playground area in Santa Rita Park. The trees will be recycled into mulch. For info, contact Parks and Recreation at (970) 375-7321 or by email at rec@durangogov.org Stephen Ministry Program Open to Help People in Our Community The First United Methodist Church of Durango has an active Stephen Ministry program which offers one-to-one care for individuals experiencing a crisis like losing a job, losing a loved one, divorce or terminal illness. Stephen Ministers are available to all members of our community. Please note: Stephen Ministry is not mental health counseling. If you know someone who is having a tough time, please ask them to call Stephen Leader, Cathy Schadt, at (970) 259-9293 for more information.


MurderInk

The year’s first big squall rolls in Buy, borrow or steal Thomas Perry’s ‘The Burglar’ while you still can by Jeffrey Mannix

T

homas Perry’s new fiction, The Burglar, will be released next Tues., Jan. 8, and you should stop reading right now and call Maria’s Bookshop to hold a copy or get on the list at the library. Do it now, before you have to wait three months to read one of the most exciting books for which you will skip meals, showers, sex and call in sick to finish reading. There are not many writers in the crime fiction genre with Perry’s ability to build electric plots and stereographic characters. We either get grandiloquent plots with flat, cardboard performers used primarily to turn the pages, or we find colorful, endearing actors plodding through a dopey story. Both imperfect intrigues can be fun reading, but they’re left on an airplane and immediately forgotten. But when the best of each comes together, it flirts with literature and makes the chronicles of “Murder Ink.” Tom Perry achieves such a lofty perch with most everything he writes, including his debut novel The Butcher Boy, which won an Edgar Award, and The Old Man – both reviewed here and with a permanent place in my library. The Burglar’s main character, Elle Stowell, is a fetching, smart, precocious and charming young woman who moves in affluent circles. Her life is full of country clubs, resorts, penthouse parties, beach houses, yacht clubs and haute couture. Elle is a burglar. She’s a pro:

she knows who has jewels, who keeps money and how to deactivate alarms, pick locks, scramble across rooftops, safely fence her merchandise. She also knows to trust nobody. Having prepped a dormer window at a party at a famous art dealer’s home in Beverly Hills, under cover of night she scales the gates, climbs, shimmies and squeezes through the third-floor attic window. Her plan is to search out the closet safe and other believed inviolable hidey-holes. She heads first to the master bedroom, silently opens the door, squats for a stealthy look, and on the bed sees the art dealer and two prominent socialite wives entangled in a ménage à trois. And very dead – each with a bullet hole in the forehead. A camera on a tripod is off to the side, plugged in and filming. Although she’s not sure why, Elle takes the cam-

Jonesing?

era, leaves through the window she came in and goes home. She copies the camera’s memory card onto her laptop and wastes no time going back to the house to return the camera, turn it back on, reset the alarms and leave without a trace. She’s good; she’s cool; she’s thorough; she’s the best. But she now has a complication akin to a high-wire walker between skyscrapers watching a squall come in. The squall of police and forensic snoops who will or won’t discover clues that she knows won’t come from her being there. Or will they … ? I can’t tell you any more; you don’t want this exciting story spoiled. But it wouldn’t louse up anything to know that Elle is being followed, round the clock, by black SUVs with blacked-out windows. And we’re just on page 57. This is a hell of a story, it’s going to win some awards, and you’re the first to know. n As with all “Murder Ink” titles, mention the Telegraph at Maria’s Bookshop and get 15 percent off.

Drinking&DiningGuide Himalayan Kitchen 992 Main Ave., 970-259-0956 www.himkitchen.com Bringing you a taste of Nepal, Tibet & India. Try our all-you-can-eat lunch buffet. The dinner menu offers a variety of tempting choices, including yak, lamb, chicken, beef & seafood; extensive veggies; freshly baked bread. Full bar. Get your lunch punch card – 10th lunch free. Hours: Lunch, 11am-2:30 p.m. & dinner, Sun. - Thurs., 5-9:30 p.m., Fri. & Sat. ‘til 10 p.m. Closed 2:30 to 5 daily $$ Crossroads Coffee 1099 Main Ave., 970-903-9051 Crossroads coffee proudly serves locally roasted Fahrenheit coffee and delicious baked goods. Menu includes gluten-free items along with bullet-proof coffee, or bullet-proof chai! Come in for friendly service and the perfect buzz! Hours: Mon.- Fri., 7 a.m. - 4 p.m. $

Issue 6 is now out! Wherever you find the Telegraph or at www.gulchmag.com. To find out about advertising opportunities, email steve@gulchmag.com

BREW Pub & Kitchen 117 W. College Drive, 970-259-5959 www.brewpubkitchen.com Experience Durango’s award-winning brewery & restaurant featuring unique, hand-crafted beers, delicious food - made from scratch, and wonderful wines & cocktails. Happy Hour, Tues.- Fri. 4-6 pm & all day Sunday with $1 off beers, wines & wells & enjoy select appetizers at 20% off. Watch the sunset behind Smelter Mountain as the train goes by. Hours: Wed.-Sun., Noon - 9p.m., Tues. 4p.m. - 9 p.m. Closed on Mon. $$

telegraph

Jan. 3, 2019 n 23


B

a picture . y u ..

it lasts longer. Some of the amazing photos you see in the Telegraph are now available to purchase online, in digital or print. (*for personal enjoyment and use only.) To find out more, go to durangotelegraph.com and click on “buy photos.�

24 n Jan. 3, 2019

telegraph


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