Durango Telegraph - December 20, 2018

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Dec. 20, 2018 Vol. XVII, No. 51 durangotelegraph.com

inside

T H E

O R I G I N A L

I N D I E

W E E K L Y

L I N E

O N

D U R A N G O

&

B E Y O N D

A downward slide

Cold feat

Absinthe-minded

Fewer avi deaths seen as good sign, but vigilance still key p8

A look at some of the San Juans’ classic ice-climbing lines p12

Surviving a dance with the green fairy & the morning after p14

2 n Dec. 20, 2018

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lineup

8

4 La Vida Local

Slippery slope

Avalanche deaths are down, but vigilance still key in fickle snowpack

4 Thumbin’ It

by Tracy Chamberlin

5 Word on the Street

10

6-7 Soapbox

Colorado Classic announces all-womens road race for 2019

11 Mountain Town News

Ladies only

by Missy Votel

12-13 Day in the Life

12-13

16 Flash in the Pan

Good pickins

17 Top Shelf

Chilling out on some of the San Juans’ coolest lines photos by Stephen Eginoire

18-19 On the Town

14

21-22 Free Will Astrology

Absinthe-minded An evening dancing with the green fairy – and living to tell

22 Classifieds

by Donna Hewett

23 Ask Rachel

16

23 Haiku Movie Review

Evergreen

On the cover: John Shocklee keeps it real, freeheeling in the San Juan backcountry./ Photo by Stephen Eginoire

Extending the growing season with the winter farmer’s market

by Ari LeVaux

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EDITORIALISTA: Missy Votel (missy@durangotelegraph.com) ADVERTISING AFICIONADO: Lainie Maxson (lainie@durangotelegraph.com) RESIDENT FORMULA ONE FAN: Tracy Chamberlin (tracy@durangotelegraph.com)

T

he Durango Telegraph publishes every Thursday, come hell, high water, beckoning singletrack or monster powder days. We are wholly owned and operated independently by the Durango Telegraph

STAR-STUDDED CAST: Lainie Maxson, Chris Aaland, Clint Reid, Stephen Eginoire, Tracy Chamberlin, Jesse Anderson, Zach Hively, Donna Hewett and Shan Wells

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We’re only human. If, by chance, we defame someone’s good name or that of their family, neighbor, best

friend or dog, we will accept full responsibility in a public flogging in the following week’s issue.

Although “free but not easy,” we can be plied with schwa, booze and flattery.

PHONE: 970.259.0133

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Ear to the ground: “I tried cutting out snowflakes with my daughter, but they came out looking like pornography.”

– Holiday decorating gone horribly awry

Hearing voices

thepole

RegularOccurrences

It’s time to channel your inner karaoke star – the Durango Voice is back. Although auditions don’t take place till Feb. 23, submissions for the 4th annual Manna fundraiser are due Jan. 11.

Aspiring contestants are asked to submit their two-minute songs in mp3 format to durango voice2@gmail.com and to include their name, phone number and a short bio. The contest is open to all ages and abilities, from showersinging amateurs to fledgling superstars.

Eighteen lucky winners will be chosen from the submissions to go onto the live auditions Feb. 23 at the Henry Strater Theatre. From there, 12 will be chosen by the four-judge panel to go on to the finals Sat., April 6, at the Strater.

In the meantime, finalists will also receive a free month of voice coaching. Three winners will be selected at the finals, and in addition to local notoriety and fame, will receive gift certificates, prizes and singing engagements around town.

The Durango Voice supports the efforts and mission of Manna. For more information about The Voice or Manna, visit www.mannasoup kitchen.org or email durangovoice2@gmail.com.

Raising cane We all have our most despised Christmas carol, but what about that other overdone holiday abomination: Christmas candy?

The Candystore.com blog recently took a reader poll to find out which holiday sweets give folks nightmares of sugar bombs dancing in their heads the most. While the list may not surprise you, with the holiday regifting glut upon us, it probably bears repeating. A few of the biggest offenders: 1. Christmas tree nougat – “Everything about these is all wrong. First off, it looks like a poker chip that you can only cash in for sadness,” blogger Claire Robbins writes. “Wretched is a word that comes to mind. Seriously the WORST.” 2. Reindeer corn – A Christmas huedvariation of the Halloween staple, the corn scorn ran high among readers. (As lovers of candy corn, we and Robbins took issue with this.

“There is substance here, people.

It’s tasty sugary goodness,” Robbins wrote. We concur.)

3. Peeps – Another low-hanging fruit on the candy tree. “The texture alone gives me the heeby geebies,” wrote Robbins, who compared it to “swallowing rubbery styrofoam.” (For the record, we love Peeps almost as much as candy corn.)

4. Peppermint bark – This ubiquitous entry is a love-it-or-hate-it thing, with detractors referring to it as “Grinch vomit” and to white chocolate as the “runt of the chocolate family.”

5. Chocolate-covered cherry cordials – At last, one we can ALL agree on. Obviously, folks took issue with the plastic-y shell and the strange goop inside. And why the heck is it called a “cordial” – there is nothing polite about having one of these dribbling down your chin at the office party.

Dec. 20, 2018 n

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opinion

LaVidaLocal Sleeping dog’s lie I recently broke the most universally applicable, insightful and helpful advice I’ve ever heard. It didn’t come from a rabbi or a Hallmark card. It didn’t come from Mr. Rogers or a scout leader or an elderly neighbor. It certainly didn’t come from the internet or a teacher. Rather, it came from a Dean Koontz thriller: “Never lie to the dog.”

Lying to a dog is easy – at least on paper. After all, dogs can’t read. But even if you lie to dogs out loud, they’ll treat you just the same as if you spoke the truth. Oh, they’ll know you lied to them – they’ll smell that one part-per-million of guilt that drips into your heartless bloodstream. But that doesn’t stop their unconditional affection, or fear, or whatever it is they feel toward you. I suspect that for the dogs, lying is a lesser offense than, say, failing to feed them bacon grease or salmon skins for breakfast.

Lying to the dog doesn’t matter to the dog. But it matters to me. Oh, sure, I could lie to myself all day. Other people, even, given good cause. Yet I refuse to speak untruths to an all-heart-and-nose being who can’t even understand the words I’m using except when he wants to.

I adopted a new dog – let’s call him “Hawkeye” because that is his name – late this summer. For more than four months, I succeeded in not lying to him. I didn’t even break my word or soften the truth enough to bend it.

Then I went to a Christmas party.

Now I do enjoy the occasional Christmas party. I particularly enjoy this one specific Christmas party.

I get to see plenty of other introverted writers and photographers and other artists whom I ever see only at this one Christmas party. We all laugh and flirt and buy each other drinks because the bar is open. When the bar tab closes, we caravan around town, shutting down other bars until we nearly get in a fight with cowboys, which we back down from because we are artists and they break horses. Then we all celebrate the annual Christmas hangover. It’s always worth it, once we’ve forgotten about last year’s annual Christmas hangover.

But not this year. This year, I was set on driving my own self home after the first stop. No after-after parties, no tussling with cowboys. I told Hawkeye so. I’d be home to feed him dinner after the official party wrapped.

I didn’t mean to lie to the dog. But I did.

I did as soon as I accepted the first drink I didn’t order for myself. I’ll always have enough college student left in me not to decline a free double.

Plus, I couldn’t well be rude, could I? Not on Christmas. This drink was an embodied act of Good Will to Men – specifically, Good Will to Me. Besides, I sipped it slowly, until I had to slam it to catch up with everyone else going down the street to the next establishment.

I kept my wits about me. I had enough sense, for example, not to pick up ping-pong paddles or foosball handles and pretend I could play respectably.

I had enough sense to pocket my wallet when I ditched my coat along the back wall. And I had enough sense, when someone asked me how I was getting home, to abandon my resolve to drive myself there.

The shared cab dropped me at the end of the block. I got home, and Hawkeye was purely happy to see me. He didn’t gripe about dinner being hours late. If he smelled my greater than one partper-million of Christmas cheer, he kindly didn’t mention it. We played fetch outside, in the dark and all 10 degrees of Fahrenheit.

Drinking doesn’t affect me like other people. It’s just a mask I can put on or take off to be with people I enjoy being with. That’s always been my truth.

Back inside, I pulled a bottle off the top of the fridge and took a whiff. Then I dumped it down the sink. I dumped all of it. Every remnant of every bottle.

I enjoy the bonding that seems to happen over a glass. I do. I like the way I feel while I’m having a drink. But I don’t like the way I feel when I’m done drinking. I like not losing Saturday to Friday night. I like being myself, and talking with folks who enjoy me being myself.

I’ll still go to Christmas parties, and I’ll deck the halls with my ping-pong opponents. But I’m done sloshing myself to fit as a round peg into those square holes. I’m ready to embarrass myself of my own volition, without any help. I’m ready to keep my word with my dog.

I don’t ever deal in absolutes. And I always say, you never know what’s coming. So I cannot say I will never drink again. I mean, what if I’m dining in Paris’ finest, and the sommelier suggests a perfect pairing for my duck confit oui madame? Or I’m in a remote foreign village without the words to explain my refusal of my host’s traditional liqueur? Or someone buys me a beer?

I won’t know what I’ll do until it happens. I like to think that I care about what I think of me more than I care what anyone else thinks of me. I like to think I’ll stick to my word, as long as it serves me.

So here’s to making the hard choices. No – to making the choices I need to make! I won’t drink to that.

Thumbin’It A few more options for summer air travel in and out of DRO, with United and American airlines announcing weekly flights to Chicago, Houston and L.A. The COGCC closing a loophole in oil and gas setbacks and making the 1,000-foot buffer apply to all school grounds and facilities, not just school buildings Interior Secretary Ryan Zinke, the orchestrator of the Bears Ears and Grand Staircase-Escalante national monument dismantling, stepping down amid a firestorm of ethics violations

4 n Dec. 20, 2018

– Zach Hively

This Week’s Sign of the Downfall: Needless hysteria in already turbulent times, with hoax bomb threats called into three of Durango’s elementary schools this week Another new low for the office of POTUS, with Trump shutting down his nonprofit Donald Trump Foundation for allegations of “persistently illegal conduct” such as using funds to pay legal settlements, buy art and make political donations More creepy Big Brother revelations about Facebook, with the tech giant reportedly allowing companies to read and/or delete users’ private messages without their knowledge

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Incarcerpated David Berry Jr., a poacher from Missouri, was sentenced to a year in prison for illegally killing hundreds of deer, chopping off their heads, and leaving the bodies to rot. But since this is ‘Merica, the judge gave Berry an additional punishment: he must watch Disney’s “Bambi” at least once a month while he’s incarcerated.

Berry’s father and brother are going to jail as well (cue the banjo music) for related weapons charges, but their charges weren’t severe enough for cartoons.

WordontheStreet With the year coming to a close, the Telegraph asked: “What will you miss most about 2018?”

Q

“Giving birth to my first child.”

Anna Layden

“My fiancee.”

Christopher Rogers

Kelly von Stroh

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“The 416 Fire – I baked it a cake when it was onemonth-old.”

“I’ll tell you what I won’t miss: the divisiveness.”

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“Being back in Durango after moving to Mexico City”

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Dec. 20, 2018 n 5

ReTooned/by Shan Wells

SoapBox Playing ‘Masters of the Universe’ To the editor, I have a message for the people who want to relocate wolves to Colorado – and those who don’t. Leave native fauna (and flora) alone! If wolves return to Colorado on their own, fine. If they don’t, fine. Native animals have challenging lives as it is and don’t need our interference to make things worse. We need to: 1. Stop destroying habitat; 2. Unless you plan to eat what you kill, stop shooting, trapping, poisoning, experimenting on, feeding and relocating wildlife; 3. Remove domestic livestock from public land and leave it to wildlife. Take responsibility for your animals without public subsidies. Maybe meat should cost $40 a pound; 4. Quit playing “Masters of the Universe” as if humans know what’s best for every other living thing. Our hubris is appalling. Will species go extinct? Yes; they already are and will continue to do so at an alarming pace (and once they’re gone, we will go, too). Why? Because humans have determined that everything else on Earth was put here to serve our every greed, including the “right” to reproduce ad infinitum.

Put that in your pipe and smoke it, everyone. (If I haven’t pissed you off, you’re not paying attention.

Wake up!)

– Eilene Lyon, Durango

Wolf symposium shared science To the editor, I was honored to share some lessons learned about ranching in wolf country at the Durango Wolf Symposium on Nov. 29. And I was disappointed by the letter to

the editor (Dec. 6) sent by Naomi Dobbs representing the La Plata County Farm Bureau, La Plata County Cattlemen’s Association and La Plata Liberty Coalition – a letter that misrepresented both the symposium and the science on wolves.

Wolves are native to most of North America. Gray

wolves lived from northern Mexico to the Arctic, from the Pacific to the Great Lakes. As with most species, individual size increased from south to north. Gray wolves were nearly extirpated south of the Canadian border; and after decades of recovery in the Northern Rockies, Great Lakes and a small part of the Southwest, they now occupy 4

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about 15 percent of their former range in the Lower 48.

Gray wolves from any of those places could be reintroduced to western Colorado. Wolves already coexist with people and livestock in those places, and, in Europe, several times as many wolves live with millions of people.

The symposium brought together a group of wolf biologists, Native Americans, a historian, a range conservationist, a member of the Colorado Wolf Management Working Group, a rancher who has learned to live alongside wolves, and a local rancher who would rather not. The point of the symposium was to share multiple perspectives of professionals who have lived and worked with or studied wolves, not to have a debate between two sides. The organizers did not pay any of the presenters for our time.

It turns out that most biologists and even some ranchers think that western Colorado could once again be wolf country, and if so, that ranches would continue providing benefits to society, including habitat.

Colorado’s existing wolf plan (2004-05) did not address reintroduction, only management of dispersers from other states. That’s the plan that Mark Pearson outlined – a presentation misrepresented in the Dec. 6 letter.

The comparison of the Durango Wolf Symposium to the so-called “symposium” hosted by Big Game Forever, an anti-wolf propaganda organization, is an insult to science.

Had the writers actually attended the symposium, they could confirm it covered the usual issues raised by people who fear wolves. In contrast to what the letter writers would have you believe, the risk to big game is greatly exaggerated: most of the Northern Rockies now have more elk than they did when wolves were reintroduced. Only where wolves were allowed to reach very high density were they able to locally reduce (previously overpopulated) elk herds.

The purported threat to human safety was only addressed because it is a persistent concern, not a real issue.

And hydatid disease, a parasite associated with domestic dogs and sheep, is a red herring.

I ran cattle in the northern San Juan Mountains for a few years. I never lost a calf, and thanks to strategic grazing

management and low-stress herding, my cows rediscovered their herd instinct and learned to mob up and run off potential predators. I actually left Colorado for five years to work on ranges shared with grizzly bears and wolves in Montana and Wyoming.

Since Montana stopped trying to count all of its wolves, those wolves have been verified as killing about 50 cattle (mostly calves) per year, out of about 2.5 million. Not all predation is documented, but it is far from what anti-wolf extremists would have us believe. Nevertheless predation can be locally significant. And it turns out that my experiences with strategies for preventing predation – while making the ranch more resilient – aren’t unique to me. Other ranchers in big-predator country, including Joe Engelhart who joined the symposium from Alberta, have successfully applied those ideas.

My purpose at the symposium was not to argue for wolf restoration in Colorado, but to share some experiences and the stories of some ranchers and cowboys who are learning to live with wolves.

But, full disclosure: I think Colorado is more Colorado with its ranchers than without. Our cowboys would be punchier, our mountains higher, our breeze more invigorating if it carried the howl of the wolf.

Colorado ranchers, tough as their wolf-country brethren, have a soft spot: love of their animals. It’s time for us to expand our love beyond humans and domestic animals to the wild ones. Our greatest wildlife biologist, Aldo Leopold, also a forester and farmer, saw it most clearly: only the mountain has developed a broad enough perspective to listen objectively to that howl.

– Matt Barnes, Dolores

Broken street lights pose hazard To the editor, There are a lot of street lights along the River Trail and on Bennett Street that are out. There is also a street light at the 32nd Street boat launch that has been flashing like

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a strobe light for over two weeks, which is dangerous for a couple reasons: one being the amount of deer that cross right there, and the second being the vision of the people biking, running and driving. Now that it is winter and the days are short, it would be nice to be able to go out and exercise safely or walk after work and to be able to see and not get potentially hit by a car.

– Amanda St Pierre, Durango

Vermont – for Rilke

Tell me again about that clearing in the woods where she kissed you for the first time.

Immortals – angels – never tire of those stories.

That is love, isn’t it? That image, that memory?

Clothed ineradicably in self and time when the caustic is removed.

What we don’t have.

It is your story, not ours – tell it again, while you can, to those of us removed from all actuality or potentiality except in essence.

We muses long to cry once more forever as you have.

Not like you, because of the loss, in time, but for the gift of its happening after all.

– Christian Hatfield, Durango

“We’ll print damned-near anything” The Telegraph prides itself on a liberal letters policy. We offer this forum to the public to settle differences, air opinions & undertake healthy discourse. We have only three requests: limit letters to 750 words, letters must be signed by the writer; and thank-you lists and libelous, personal attacks are unwelcome. Send your insights by Tuesday at noon to: PO Box 332, Durango, 81302 or e-mail your profundities to: telegraph@durangotelegraph.com. Let the games begin ...

Dec. 20, 2018 n 7

TopStory

On the downward slide As avalanche fatalities decline, awareness and education remain priorities

by Tracy Chamberlin

A

s one member on the Colorado Avalanche Information Center wrote in the nonprofit’s most recent annual report for the 2016-17 winter season, “Unfortunately Colorado had one avalanche fatality, one fatality too many.”

That number is down from five JusttheFacts avalanche-related What: Avalanche Awareness event hosted by Silverton Avalanche School fatalities over the 2015-16 season, When: Fri., Dec. 28, 6-8 p.m. according to the Where: Avon Hotel in Silverton CAIC, a decline For info.: www.avyschool.org that is happening at both the state and national levels. Over the past several years, in fact, there has been a sharp drop in avalanche fatalities across the United States.

It’s not a result of a lack of snow either. For example, in 2012 and 2013 – both years of record low snowfall and persistent drought conditions – the number of avalanche fatalities was higher, recording 7 and 11 respectively.

The decline is certainly a welcome trend, but avalanche experts use caution when analyzing the statistics.

“I don’t know if we’re getting better or if we’re just getting lucky,” Michael Ackerman, faculty for Silverton Avalanche School and board member of Friends of the San Juans, said.

Jeremy Yanko inspects an intentionally triggered wind slab last week. Conditions continue to be touchy and avalanche prone./ Photo by Stephen Eginoire The real risk with celebrating the declining numbers, experts say, is taking them for granted. Ackerman calls it a negative feedback loop.

Someone who survives a near miss – which can also be described as an avalanche accident that could have ended fatally – can start to let his or her guard down, or believe it’s more than just luck.

“In avalanche and backcountry travel, there’s nothing out there that’s safe,” Ackerman explained.

Not only is there a risk of getting caught in the negative feedback loop, but the numbers are not necessarily reliable.

Unlike ski resorts where passes and lift tickets are scanned for an accurate skier count, it’s hard to know exactly how many people head into the mountains in search of fresh

powder. One way experts attempt to assess backcountry use is by looking at the increasing number of sales for backcountry gear, like skins or avalanche beacons.

However, it’s impossible to know if all that gear actually gets used. One way local professionals gauge the popularity of the backcountry is to head up to Red Mountain on any given weekend.

It used to be just a few vehicles scattered along the pass but, according to Jim Donovan, director for the Silverton Avalanche School, these days it’s packed.

“I think the use has really skyrocketed in the past 10 years,” he added.

There are several reasons for the increase in popularity, Donovan said. For one, gear has improved. It’s lighter, 4

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8 n Dec. 20, 2018

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more affordable and more effective. Also, snowmobilers have grown dramatically as a user group with vehicles capable of taking on terrain that used to be unreachable.

“The tools, technology and techniques we use in the backcountry are being refined and advancing at an amazing speed,” Ackerman explained.

It’s still hard to know, however, just how much new technologies and improved gear impact the numbers.

Experts say they do have confidence in the data associated with avalanche fatalities.

Those numbers come from official sources, like Forest Service or coroner reports. But the data for things like accidents and near misses are less concrete.

First of all, not everyone is willing to tell his or her story of a near miss. It can be challenging to face the trauma or admit mistakes, especially in a public forum. It’s even harder for professionals who may fear it’s a blemish on their record.

Donovan said that’s beginning to change with avalancheworkersafety.org, a website where reports on accidents and near misses can be submitted anonymously.

Something else that stands out in the CAIC’s statistics are the number of fatalities in Colorado compared to the rest of the country. Between the winters of 1950-51 and 2016-17, Colorado reported 276 avalanche fatalities, the most, by far, of any state, with Alaska coming in second at 152.

One of the reasons for Colorado’s spot at No. 1 is the growing number of people who visit and recreate in the Centennial State.

The other reason is the tricky snowpack found in this part of the country.

“If you can figure out the snowpack in the San Juans, you can do it anywhere,” Ackerman said.

With the mix of snow types, inconsistent snowfall and wide temperature fluctuations in this part of the country, the snowpack here is unlike any other. It also doesn’t change quickly. This region is infamous for its persistent conditions – meaning when there’s an avalanche danger, it takes a long time for that danger to pass.

What makes this region so fickle is also what makes it a hot spot for avalanche research and snow science.

Donovan called the San Juans an amazing mountain range with a long history of being a hub of avalanche research and snow science. With so many experts in one place, the Silverton Avalanche School decided to host a first-ever avalanche awareness event for the general public.

The event will highlight many of the area’s snow and ice minds, as well as introduce the subject to anyone who isn’t in the know when it comes to avalanches. It happens Fri., Dec. 28, from 6-8 p.m. at the Avon Hotel in Silverton.

“We do have a lot of great local resources,” Donovan said. “People need to access them and use them.”

One thing Ethan Greene, director for the Colorado Avalanche Information Center, noted about the CAIC’s statistics was that although more people are participating in winter recreation activities – like backcoun-

The back side Resources for backcountry travel and avalanche awareness: • Colorado Avalanche Information Center: avalanche.state.co.us • Friends of the San Juans: www.thesanjuans.org • Avalanche Worker Safety program and near-miss database: avalancheworkersafety.org Also check out a personal story of avalanche awareness in the latest edition of The Gulch: Heavy backcountry use in avalanche terrain above www.gulchmag.com Red Mountain Pass./ Photo by Stephen Eginoire try skiing or snowmobiling – the number of avalanche deaths is not climbing at the same rate.

He said there’s a lot of different reasons why this could be happening, but it’s hard to argue that education and outreach efforts are not making a difference.

In the past few years alone, class offerings for both professionals and recreationists have increased and changed to suit the two different types of users. In this region, organizations like Friends of the San Juans and the Silverton Avalanche School have seen a

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marked increase in attendance.

Ackerman said in the Friends of the San Juans latest round of introductory avalanche awareness clinics, the group hosted about 140 participants. He attributes the increase to the growing popularity of backcountry recreation, a growing awareness by many users of the need for safety, and the push by groups like Friends to advocate for education.

“We’re really in a resource rich environment,” he added. “I hope we don’t take it for granted.” n

Dec. 20 2018 n

9

Quick’n’Dirty COGCC closes setback loophole

Colorado Classic goes women only

Fracking foes have won a battle in the war on setbacks.

On Tuesday, the Colorado Oil and Gas Conservation Commission passed a rule that requires new oil and gas development to be at least 1,000 feet from all outdoor and modular school and day-care facilities, rather than just school buildings. This rule closes a loophole that formerly allowed oil and gas activity to occur near school playgrounds and sports fields, as long as it was 1,000 feet from school buildings.

“Closing this loophole is a much-needed change, and we’re glad to see increased protections for the health and safety of children across Colorado,” Conservation Colorado’s Sophia Mayott-Guerrero said. “But, it is important to note that this is just one small step forward; we look forward to working with Governor-elect Polis and the Legislature to ensure that health and safety of all Coloradans is prioritized when it comes to oil and gas development.”

Closing the loophole was a three-year effort on the part of a handful of other citizen environmental advocacy groups. Several bills introduced into the State Legislature that would have closed the loophole were defeated.

According to the groups, oil and gas development puts those nearby at risk from smog, benzene and a host of other toxins. In addition, It poses more imminent threats, such as blowouts, gas leaks and explosions. Last year, a school in Erie was closed due to wafting hazardous gas from a nearby venting operation. In addition, a high school football game in Greeley was evacuated in 2017 because of a methane leak just 600 feet from the stadium.

“We should not put children at risk for a privately owned company’s bottom line,” Leslie Robinson, chairwoman of the Grand Valley Citizens Alliance said. “Everyone is a champion when we protect children’s health and safety, and we hope that this rule is the beginning of more significant changes in Colorado’s oil and gas industry.”

The Colorado Classic road race is changing gears for 2019. Organizers announced that next year, the annual race, which started in 2017, will be a womens-only affair.

The change up will make it the only stand-alone womens stage race in the Western Hemisphere on the Union Cycliste Internationale and USA Cycling Pro Road tours.

The four-stage race will take place Aug. 22-25, 2019. It is expected to bring in the best female teams and cyclists in the world to duke it out on Colorado’s most challenging terrain.

“Colorado is such a beautiful state and such a hotbed for American cycling that it seems like the perfect place to host a challenging UCI stage race that will feature the women,” pro cyclist and 2018 womens winner Katie Hall said.

More than a race, organizers hope the event helps redefine female cycling and ultimately empowers women and girls to break the mold and reach their goals.

“With women’s cycling, we saw the greatest opportunity to fulfill our mission to create a world-class race in Colorado that is socially impactful,” Ken Gart, chairman of organizer RPM Events Group, said. “By creating one great race instead of two average ones, we can shine a bright light on Colorado and pro women’s racing.”

In addition, the Colorado Classic will offer a prize purse more than the men’s 2018 purse, along with stipends to support team travel and expenses. There will also be free live streaming as well as on-demand replays through cycling and partner websites, Facebook and the race’s Tour Tracker app.

Kristin Armstrong, perhaps the most decorated female cyclist in U.S. history, who won gold in each of the last three summer Olympics, applauded the move. “The announcement of a women’s-only UCI stage race truly shows the dedication and commitment the Colorado Classic has to women in sport,” she said. “I was fortunate enough to have my start in a women’s-only event back in 2002; I

The womens podium-toppers celebrate at 2018’s Colorado Classic road race. For 2019, the race will be women-only./Courtesy photo know first-hand the tremendous amount of impact this will have on women’s cycling.”

Since its inception in 2017, the Colorado Classic has been a front-runner in women's racing in other ways as well. It was the first major USA cycling race to go without podium hostesses, opting instead to celebrate male and female cycling legends, including Connie Carpenter Phinney.

Last year, the race designed the womens routes similar to the mens, and for 2019, it has assembled an all-female team of announcers from across a variety of athletic disciplines.

“We are proud to support their bold move in becoming a women’s-only bike race,” Colorado Governor-Elect Jared Polis said. “The Colorado Classic reflects what our state is known for – innovation and inclusion – while showcasing Colorado’s diverse outdoor health and wellness lifestyle.”

– Missy Votel

Don’t take it out on the moose – we warned you.

We will be on vacation starting 12/19/18, returning to the office Mon., 12/31/18.

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Whistler rattles fossil fuel companies

WHISTLER, B.C. – Whistler this fall set out to wag its finger about climate change. Now, fingers are wagging back, accusing the resort town of hypocrisy or at least being politically tonedeaf.

The November letter that ignited the controversy was sent by recently elected mayor, Jack Crompton, to about 20 oil and gas companies, accusing them of bearing disproportionate responsibility for the growing climate crisis.

“All levels of government, industry and individuals bear responsibility for solving and paying for climate impacts,” read the letter.

“However, we suggest that your company and industry bear a larger portion of the responsibility. Your industry is aware that its products have a negative impact on the climate, yet continues to develop new resources.”

Whistler, said the letter, expects to see more rain during winter and less snow. Summers will become longer, hotter and drier, with increased risk of fires. This year it spent $1.4 million in community wildfire protection, and such investments will continue for at least 40 years.

You owe us, the letter said.

This wasn’t the first such letter sent to an oil and gas company.

Vancouver-based West Coast Environmental Law persuaded 16 communities in British Columbia to write such letters to the world’s 20 largest fossil fuel companies, only of few of which are based in Canada.

Previously, for example, the mayor of Victoria sent a letter to Chevron asking the company to pay 3.34 percent of the city’s climate-related costs going forward. “You cannot make billions of dollars selling your product, knowing that it is causing significant financial harm to communities around the world and not expect to pay for at least some of that cost.”

Many of the companies have acknowledged the link between fossil fuels and climate change, and most say they’re trying to reduce emissions. But few can make as strong a claim as the Calgarybased firm that got Whistler’s letter, Canadian Natural Resources.

The owner, along with Microsoft founder Bill Gates, has been a key investor in a project at Squamish that seeks to withdraw carbon dioxide from the air.

But there’s another reason this particular letter went viral whereas others did not. Calgary, where the company is based, is hurting, with a vacancy rate downtown of 27 percent (compared to 15 percent in Denver). Some 350,000 people in the oil and gas sector have lost their jobs as Alberta’s more expensive oil/tar sands struggle to compete in a world market glutted by oil from fracking and horizontal drilling. Those techniques have allowed the United States to become a net exporter for the first time in 75 years and the world’s No. 1 producer of oil.

But for Whistler to point the finger at a company in Calgary was seen by some as the height of hypocrisy. Columnists from Toronto to Vancouver pointed to the dependence of Whistler on mostly long-distance travelers to sustain its economy.

To buy carbon offsets to neutralize their carbon-based travel, air travelers from London flying in economy class would have to cough up $50, while those from Sydney would have to pay $82.80, pointed out the Vancouver Sun. Flying first class quadruples the offsets.

Without singling out ski towns, the Economist made the same point. On average, each person going about their normal business produces 5 tons of carbon dioxide a year. But a single transatlantic roundtrip produces about 1 ton per economy class passenger.

Whistler’s letter caused several companies to cancel their plans to attend a conference planned there in January. The energy component of that conference also was subsequently cancelled.

In response, the Whistler mayor posted a video on Facebook that expressed a “sincere regret that anyone felt unwelcome here.”

Crompton also seemed to back away from criticism of oil and gas.

Whistler as a community, he said, acknowledges “that we depend upon fossil fuels. We have a responsibility to respond to the climate change challenge ourselves and do it locally.”

In her assessment of the controversy, Whistler’s Pique Newsmagazine editor Clare Ogilvie faulted Whistler for not being sensitive to the distress of Calgary and Alberta. But the errant tactic does not diminish the urgency of climate change, she said.

In her estimation, nobody looks good. Fossil fuel companies have been aware of their impact on the environment for years, yet they

have continued to expand while raking in huge profits.

But the tourism industry – including Whistler – can’t clean up its act, either. She points to a 2018 study in Nature Climate Change that found tourism accounts for around 8 percent of global greenhouse gas emissions. Air travel was the primary culprit.

“Do we not need to get our own house in order before we start demanding others do the same?” she asked. Whistler, she noted, can’t seem to ban plastic bags, stop outside heaters and gas fires from being left on all the time, or get shop-keepers to close their doors in the winter.

Real estate deal spells Zinke’s demise WHITEFISH, Mont. – Ryan Zinke is leaving the cabinet of Donald Trump, and The New York Times says that a real estate deal figures into his departure.

As Interior Secretary, Zinke, a former Navy seal, was in charge of the national parks and BLM lands, as well as other agencies. He led Trump’s efforts to allow more drilling on public lands and downsize two national monuments in Utah.

The most damaging allegation against him may involve a real estate deal in Whitefish, Mont., his hometown. Politico earlier this year wrote that David J. Lesar, the chairman of Halliburton, was lending financial support to a hotel and shopping development in Whitefish. That project would make property owned by Zinke significantly more valuable. Zinke’s wife had pledged in writing to allow the developer to build a parking lot that would help make the project possible.

“Because Halliburton is the nation’s largest oil services company, and Mr. Zinke regulates the oil industry on public land, the deal raises questions about conflict of interest,” says the Times.

More wildlife crossings over interstates PARK CITY, Utah – A wildlife overpass, the largest in Utah, has been completed across interstate 80 between Park City and Salt Lake. And work continues on a wildlife overpass across Interstate 90 near Ski the Summit at Snoqualmie, east of Seattle.

The 320-foot-long Utah overpass was built at a cost of $22 million with the intent of allowing deer, elk and moose to cross the highway without danger of hooves ending up on hoods. That segment of highway where it was placed has been called “Slaughter Row.” Is it wide enough? Lorelei Combs, a member of Save People Save Wildlife, said the overpass needed to be wider and more natural looking, with grasses, trees and shrubs. “We were hoping for something bigger and better, but something is better than nothing,” she told The Park Record.

In Washington, the $6.2 million crossing of I-90 has largely been completed, connecting the north and south Cascades. The Seattle Times reported that the equivalent of 1.5 million bags of dirt such as you buy at Home Depot had been used. More than twodozen wildlife crossings or underpasses are either completed or planned along a 15-mile stretch of the highway.

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Salt Lake U.S. nominee for 2030 Games SALT LAKE CITY, Utah – Salt Lake City has gotten the nod over Denver as the U.S. nominee to host the 2030 Olympics.

The Denver Post noted that Denver and Salt Lake City were the final two U.S. competitors after Reno-Tahoe withdrew earlier this year. Salt Lake proposed to run the Games for $1.3 billion by reusing facilities from the 2002 Olympics.

A poll found 83 percent support for the Olympic bid among Utah residents. Denver’s bid faced stronger skepticism among Colorado residents.

But will Utah be asked to host the 2026 Olympics? There’s some conjecture. Calgary withdrew from bidding in November, leaving only Stockholm and a joint Italian bid of Milan and Cortina d’Ampezzo. But there’s some shakiness to both bids.

If Utah wins, Park City would figure prominently. It hosted several of the events in 2002. Other events would be held at the Utah Olympic Park, located near the turnoff from I-80.

“Park City could host the games nearly any time,” Park City Mayor Andy Beerman said. “We’ve kept all the infrastructure in place.”

– Allen Best

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n Dec. 20, 2018

Cold Feat W

by Stephen Eginoire

hat could be more enthralling than climbing a frozen waterfall?

A minute to learn, and a lifetime to master, ice climbing is one of the more accessible climbing disciplines (provided that one has the right equiment) here in the San Juans. Between the mountain towns of Silverton, Ouray and Telluride, there is enough beautiful blue ice to keep beginners and professionals alike busy all winter long. And, with the recent opening of the Ouray Ice Park, it’s game on. Here’s a look at but a few of our classic neighborhood ice lines.

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Dec. 20, 2018 n 13

thesecondsection

Absinthe

makes the heart grow fonder (& the head hurt) An evening with the storied green fairy – and living to tell

by Donna Hewett

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s usual, I wanted something locally made. This time from the liquor store. You know, a holiday bottle of cheer for friends back in Brooklyn sort of thing. Lars, on my last visit, showcased a fragile yellow bottle of buffalo grass vodka from Upstate. Reminiscent of – though certainly not as powerful as – green chartreuse, it seemed to render us very apt-minded indeed. Until we soon found ourselves weeping in the middle of the afternoon, overwhelmed by David Bowie’s just awarded “Blackstar” CD. Spirit notes. Timeless moments. That’s what I’m after – a special liquor guaranteed to deliver a poetic punch, a real alcoholic kick that announces a fair well to sobriety (for now anyway).

I’ve just missed the only day of the year (Dec. 1) where you can stand in line with a thousand or so other folks in Denver to buy the cult-like Stranahan’s Colorado Whiskey, Snowflake Batch 21. However ungodly rarified, I was in no position to travel or spend a hundred bucks on a bottle, nor wait on the cold street for anything that’s not supporting my own dang neighborhood.

In downtown Durango, I find a wonderful world full of liquor, a large store with what looks to be a million-dollar-plus inventory of booze. Quite impressive.

After strolling the aisles, I find myself staring at a creepy $65 bottle of absinthe; its Gothic label seems to advertise contents that just might very well make you dead.

Hmmm. Getting close.

Right next to it, I see what I’m looking for. A bottle of absinthe brewed in Golden, with a price point that makes more sense ($24). The bottle’s label: Damn. Good. Absinthe Verte. A very strong spirit (110 proof), that’s fla-

14 n Dec. 20, 2018

vored green with botanicals of medicinal and sometime mysterious value. It’s a new product from State 38 Distilling made with local, hand-forged ingredients. Perfect. I buy it along with a mini bottle of absinthe produced in France for a taste-and-buzz comparison. The latter, rather sly, boasts “a full measure of the legendary and notorious botanical, wormwood, aka artemesia Absinthium,” the herb thought to produce a hallucinogenic euphoria that can make slicing one’s ear off seem necessary and painless (I guess).

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So caution, dear reader. Before we party like it’s 1899, we’d be better suited to refresh ourselves on the history of this Belle Epoche elixir and find out why it was banned around the world for nearly a century. That way, enduring the taste will seem more worth it. (The word “absinthe” is derived from the Greek word “apsinthion,” meaning “undrinkable.”)

Wormwood was used for medicinal purposes in ancient Egypt. In papyrus documents dating back to 3500 BC, it’s confirmed to be the best treatment (at the time) for intestinal worms. The ancient Greeks made wormwood-flavored wines, “absinthe oinos,” which began the connection. In the sense of a distilled spirit containing green anise and fennel, absinthe was created around 1792 in Couvet, Switzerland. Like the drink itself, the facts of who really invented absinthe remain a bit murky. Was it the Henroid Sisters (who feared being labeled as witches) or their newly acquainted fine French friend, Dr. Pierre Ordinaire?

Who knows? Let’s hop to 1805 when Henri-Louis Pernod opened an absinthe manufacturing company in the French town of Pontarlier, under the name Maison Pernod Fils, which remained the most popular-selling brand of absinthe until it was banned in 1914.

The consumption of absinthe grew rapidly throughout the 1840s, when it was surplussed to French troops as a malaria preventative. The soldiers brought their thirst for it back home, where it became so popular in bars, bistros, cafes and cabarets that by the 1860s, the five o’clock hour was called “L’heur vert,” the green hour. It was wildly favored by all, from the wealthy and bourgeoise, to the poor and ordinary working stiffs.

By 1880, absinthe was produced en masse, which meant a sharp decline in the price. Popularized by some of the greatest literary and artistic figures in history, it defined the heady days of late 19th century Paris. Bohemian luminaries such as Van Gogh, Degas, Toulouse-Lautrec and Picasso were inspired by the “mindaltering” effects, painting faces of filthy men and puffy women staring out at nothing at daytime cafes, sodden and benumbed. The all-powerful art critics absolutely HATED these “impressions” of degenerates. 4

And so, before too long, it became pretty clear that absinthe made a “beast of a man, a martyr of a woman and a degenerate of an infant.” That it “disorganized and ruined the family and menaced the future of mankind,” was probably not too far off track.

Talk about a country over-served. The over consumption of absinthe in France was so rife that it was believed to produce a syndrome called absinthism, characterized as addiction, hyper-excitability and hallucinations. Sufferers were all drunks and alcoholics for sure. But some of absinthe’s bad effects were possibly caused by unscrupulous manufacturers adding cheap and often poisonous ingredients such as copper sulphate for that extra green effect, or antimony trichloride to enhance the louching (clouding) of the beverage. Not to mention that glassware at this time was made of lead.

The (mostly) myth behind the effects of absinthe going beyond that of just alcohol was driven even further when it was blamed for Van Gogh’s ear-lopping and filling asylums with people made insane by drinking it. Parisians started ordering absinthe by asking for “une correspondence,” a reference to a ticket to Charenton, an infamous lunatic asylum on the outskirts of the city.

The drink also became associated with violent criminals. Probably the most notorious story occurred in 1905 when Swiss farm laborer Jean Lanfray shot and killed his pregnant wife and two daughters, supposedly in an absinthe rage. A second murder a few days later in Geneva, where a heavy drinker named Sallez also murdered his wife, led to

an outcry throughout Switzerland.

This bad reputation and the rise of the temperance movement led to absinthe being banned by the Belgians in 1905, followed by the Swiss in 1910 and the United States in 1912. Meanwhile in France, the government was under pressure from conservative newspapers, winemaking associations (still trying to recover following the decimation of European vineyards by Phyfloxera), and the impending world war to stop its production. So, it was in 1914.

Italy was the last country in Europe to ban absinthe (1932.) The United Kingdom, Spain and the Czech Republic never did.

Wormwood does have a psychotropic ingredient, thujone, which has a molecular structure similar to cannabis. That is why the drink has been linked more to narcotics than to other alcoholic substances. The trouble is that thujone is served up in such a low dose, that you would sooner die of alcohol poisoning than go mad with the sighting of green fairies and such.

About 10 years ago, absinthe was reintroduced to a world of more responsible drinkers, and more enlightened distillers.

It’s totally legal here and everywhere, for anyone (who likes the black-licorice flavor of anise) to enjoy. I like it served as an aperitif: Absinthe and Prosecco 3:1.

I drank some of the bottle from Golden just the other night. Very light, herbaceous; lots of minty notes. Much less bitter than the French stuff. Our friends Tom and Laura sniffed at it but were quite wary of touching their lips anywhere near it. My husband: definitely not a fan. Despite lots of insis-

Golden’s State 38 Distilling is part of the absinthe renaissance, creating a more modern, drinkable iteration, bedecked with a lime instead of sugar cube. But beware – like its 1880s predecessor, it packs a wallop at 110 proof. tence that absinthe is only about as harmful as gin, they were adamant in their refusal.

Fine. More for me. After I poured a super milky third cocktail, my husband slipped behind me and dumped the glass into the sink.

“Hey! You can’t do that! You’re messing with my civil liberties!”

“There’s no legal provisions, rights or protections for drunks here. And so let it be known that Absinthe ankkoyoance is hereby banned from this house.”

He poured the entire contents of the bottle away, and calmly re-sat himself at the

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dinner table. Tom and Laura’s eyes had widened, but their want to finish dinner was stronger though than the urge to flee.

So we continued naturally into an evening of good food and conversation, about – me, me, me!

Yakety yakety yack.

Sorry guys. If it’s any consolation, the absinthe hangover was a real son-of-a-bitch of ice-pick stabbing in each temple, and just beneath, throbbing. And I thought to myself, tossing beneath the covers: does the left ear just need to go? n

Dec. 20, 2018 n 15

FlashinthePan

Dressing up for winter market

by Ari LeVaux

T

he farmers markets of summer get all the glory, but pound for pound, the winter markets have more guts. These off-season centers of homegrown commerce run from about Halloween through Easter, and are like distillations of their summer counterparts, giving farmers the chance to make a little money, while offering locals an opportunity to buy some produce. Like some secret society for extra-cheerful and healthy people, those who know about the winter market show up while the rest of the world watches cartoons.

The web page LocalHarvest.org provides online tools to help farmers thrive and maintains a database of active farmers markets in the United States.

According to LocalHarvest’s Guillermo Payet, there are about 4,700 summer markets nationwide, compared to 1,911 winter markets. He recently added a winter market search feature to the LocalHarvest page, so shoppers can easily find the winter market closest to them.

Winter markets are smaller, cuter and cozier, with more hot cocoa on tap. Like a summer market, the winter market is like a big, living microchip of the farming community. You find out who died, who got pregnant, who grew a beard, and who went to Costa Rica. Like a fire in the dark, winter markets provide heat and light when it’s needed the most.

My winter market in Montana, which takes place in the senior center, which has a thrift store in the basement, is flush with “normal” cold weather crops like potatoes, squash, onions and garlic, not to mention animal and value-added products like bacon, pickles, cheese and eggs.

But thanks to advances in cold-weather horticulture, and with a little help from a warming climate, there are now summery foods available, like celery, tomatoes and apples, not to mention tropical foods like lemongrass.

But the stars of the winter market are the winter greens, that large and delicious green spectrum of leaves like spinach, tatsoi, arugula, broccoli, kale and leafy cabbages like Napa. These greens, planted during the dog days of summer, came of age in cooler, shorter days.

Under these conditions, plants build themselves differently. They are smaller but sturdier, denser and crunchier.

Maybe it’s the bleak context in which they appear, but

wintergreens emanate a vitality that you can see and taste, like earthy, bitter candies.

Here are three recipes to help you enjoy the winter greens in season today. These dressings will also benefit many non-green crops of winter too, like radishes or cauliflower. And when the time comes, these salad sauces will help us enjoy the bounty of summer.

This first recipe comes from Cheryl Marchi, proprietress of the Crazy Mountain Inn, a 117-year-old boarding house in Martinsdale, Mont., where Calamity Jane once stayed. The Inn’s living room boasts a glorious wood stove that warms that room like a winter market warms a community. The adjacent café is the toast of Meagher County and where I first tasted Marchi’s blue cheese salad dressing.

It’s thick enough to use as a dip, but not so thick that your shirt won’t look as splattered as mine does after dipping cauliflower florets too impatiently. Marchi likes it with onion-y dishes, as a dip for onion rings, or to hold the grilled onions in place on a French dip sandwich.

Crazy Mountain Blue Cheese Dressing 1/2 c milk 3½ cups Best Foods mayo 6 ounces Gorgonzola

4 or 5 cloves of garlic, crushed Lots of fresh, coarsely ground black pepper Set a third of the Gorgonzola aside. Blend everything else together. Break apart the unblended chunk of Gorgonzola into little chunks and stir it in. Let it sit for a bit, preferably overnight.

This second recipe comes courtesy of Flower Child vegan restaurant chain. This sauce is an emulsion, meaning it won’t separate after you mix it up. In other words, it’s basically lemon tahini mayo, which is pretty special.

If you add a yolk it will emulsify even thicker, but that of course would cause the dressing to lose its veganity.

The dressing also contains nutritional yeast, aka “Hippy Dust,” which seems appropriate for a restaurant called Flower Child. The yeast confers a meaty strength to the dressing, which isn’t surprising because Hippy Dust is 100 percent yeast meat.

If your garlic is large of clove, like mine, you might not want to use the full eight cloves called for. Use your best judgement, but no fewer than three cloves. The acid, sweetness, saltiness and richness of this dressing makes it a great blanket to a pile of earthy leaves.

Flower Child Lemon Tahini Dressing 8 cloves of garlic, peeled ½ cup fresh lemon juice 2 ½ tablespoons tahini 1 teaspoon whole grain mustard 2 teaspoon evaporated cane sugar 1 teaspoon kosher salt 1 tablespoon nutritional yeast ¼ c extra virgin olive oil ½ c grapeseed oil Put the first seven ingredients in a blender and process on medium speed for 15 seconds. While the machine is running, slowly pour in the oils until emulsified. Place in covered container in refrigerator.

And lastly, my wife is convinced that every homemade salad dressing needs more salt, and I think she may have a point. Her go-to dressing is basically oil and vinegar, plus soy sauce.

Mrs. LeVaux’s All-Purpose Dressing 1 cup extra virgin olive oil ½ cup soy sauce ¼ cup cider vinegar ¼ cup lime or lemon juice ¼ cup balsamic Combine ingredients, dress or dip your salad. If dipping, replenish the oil as necessary.

This dressing is especially good on bitter vegetables, like radicchio. The flavors of the dressing engage those of the greens on many levels, disarming and charming those tasty winter greens, leafing you wanting more. n

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Call/text: 970-317-5446 16 n Dec. 20, 2018

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Adieu to ’18, the Daddies and coffee table reunion larly named band, the Inconvenient Coffee Tables at the 2009 Joe Moore Picker’s Reunion. The two still jam together at local festivals, often playing Jimi Hendrix songs. “Jess has been part of the nd so we bid adieu to the calendar year 2018 … my 50th local acoustic music scene since he fell in love with the Durango year on this planet. It was a banner one for me, marked by Bluegrass Meltdown in the mid ’90s,” said Nordstrom. Since then, festivals, youth sporting events, a handful of outdoor exJester has sang and played mandolin in such groups as the Outta cursions and all-too-infrequent nights on the town. Such is the Hand String Band and Clods, the latter of which is a dirty blueburden of responsible parenthood. Adulting is never easy, but cergrass jam collective of tainly rewarding. longstanding friends.

We didn’t attend as He’s also a member of many festivals as we the Irish pub-folk quaroften do. In some years, I tet, Big’ns, playing such trek up to Telluride for all events and venues as four major musical Aztec Scottish Fiddle Soevents – Bluegrass, The ciety ceilidhs, St. Patty’s Ride, Jazz, and Blues & Day parties and Irish EmBrews. This year saw me bassy Celtic jams. Expect in Town Park just the Jester & the Nord to play four days of Bluegrass. originals and covers The two FolkWest festers ranging from Steve Earle, up on Reservoir Hill were Soft Cell, the Ramones, certainly highlights, too, Meat Puppets and, of as was this spring’s Ducourse, Hendrix. rango Bluegrass MeltThe hardworking mudown. Among my sicians in Black Velvet favorite performances of certainly are sticking ’18: the Western Cenaround over the holituries’ two-hour days. The duo of Nina twangfest at Meltdown; Sasaki & Larry Carver reLos Lobos’ epic performance at the Community The Cherry Poppin’ Daddies bring their WWII XMAS Canteen show to the turns to the Diamond Belle Saloon at 5:30 p.m.

Concert Hall last winter; FLC Community Concert Hall at 7:30 p.m. tonight (Thur., Dec. 20).

Friday and the Office Tom Russell & Ramblin’ Spiritorium at 5:30 p.m.

Jack Elliott swapping stories and songs at the Hank in late SepSaturday and then treks down to Ignacio to play the Seven Rivers tember; a politically charged Emmylou Harris at Telluride BlueSteakhouse at the Sky Ute Casino Resort at 6 p.m. on Sat., Dec. grass when she cursed (!!!) when discussing the current state of 29. The group grows to a trio for a 7 p.m. gig at the Derailed Pour American politics; a feel-good Leftover Salmon affair at the ConHouse on Fri., Dec. 28. The full Black Velvet band returns to the cert Hall (no fire alarms were set off after the band’s 15-year ban Derailed Pour House for a big show at 9 p.m. on New Year’s Eve. at that venue!); and a mind-altering set by Australian six-string The Starlight’s slate includes a funk jam from 6-9 p.m. and a slinger Tommy Emmanuel at Pagosa Folk’n Bluegrass, capped off naughty or nice party with best outfit prizes and dancing to

by Rob Ickes & Trey Hensley joining him onstage for some real Kaztro’s DJ set at 9 p.m. Friday and an ugly sweater contest at 9 pyrotechnics. p.m. Saturday. They’ll also hold a food drive to benefit Manna But those shows are in the past. Here’s what’s coming up: Soup Kitchen Friday and Saturday. Donate an unopened, nonperThe Cherry Poppin’ Daddies bring their WWII XMAS Canishable food item and receive a free drink (one per customer, but teen show to the Community Concert Hall at 7:30 p.m. tonight (Thur., Dec. 20). You might remember the Daddies from the 1990s feel free to donate more out of the goodness of your heart).

More local stuff happening the next two weeks includes Leah swing revival, in which bands like Big Bad Voodoo Daddy, SquirOrlikowski at the Ska Brewing World Headquarters from 5-7 rel Nut Zippers, the Brian Setzer Orchestra and the Daddies made tonight; the Animas Jazz Trio swinging at Jean Pierre Bakery at big band hip again. They had such hits as “Zoot Suit Riot” and 6 p.m. Friday; Kirk James does solo blues at 7 p.m. Saturday at “Brown Derby Strut.” Coming from a swing, jazz, jump blues, the Seven Rivers Steakhouse at the Sky Ute Casino Resort; and the Great American Songbook and Tin Pan Alley tradition, the DadBlue Moon Ramblers holding court at the Diamond Belle at 6 dies are retro yet contemporary, creating their own modern, iconp.m. each Sunday. oclastic version of the music that kept the Greatest Generation’s Finally, KSUT’s year-end drive concludes at noon on Fri., toes a-tappin’. Yes, the dance floor will be open.

Dec. 28, when one lucky listener/member will win a trip for two The Animas City Theatre throws a funkalicious New Year’s Eve to a Mexican resort in the big year-end drawing. Choose an bash this year featuring Elder Grown, J-Calvin and eight-day, seven-night package from one of six different ViMesquite. Doors open at 8 p.m., with music starting at 9 and a danta Resort locations, and KSUT will foot the bill for airfare champagne toast at midnight. Elder Grown combines the freefrom Durango for two. Ensure your entry by pledging online at dom of improvisational jams with captivating, original songs in a www.ksut.org or returning your holiday membership mailer by space where funk meets rock and pop meets hip-hop. J-Calvin is a the drawing date. home-grown, soul/funk outfit that played such major events as The best thing I heard this week is Shinyribs’ holiday single, Telluride Jazz this past year. Mesquite spins lo-fi, chill-hop beats.

“Christmas time in Bossier City.” It tells the tale of true love I sure do love festivals on Reservoir Hill in Pagosa Springs … between a truckstop hooker and a long-haul trucker. What more the music, the beer, the camping. One of my favorite parts of the could you want for the holidays than a hummer in a sleeper cab?

Rez Hill experience is campfire picks, when I can catch musical Anyone who’s been to the greater Shreveport area can certainly friends of mine holding court until the wee hours. Two that are appreciate Kev Russell’s literary genius. regulars, Erik Nordstrom and Jess Wilton, play the latest Erik & Friends show from 5-7 p.m. on Sun., Dec. 30 at Fenceline Cidery in Mancos. The two played in a short-lived-but spectacuSanta’s got a brand new bag? Email me at chrisa@gobrainstorm.net. n

by Chris Aaland

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onthetown

Thursday20 Yoga Flow, 8 a.m., Pine River Library.

Beginner Tai Chi, 9:15 a.m., Durango Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave. ​Baby Meetup with Durango Café au Play, 9:30-11:30 a.m., 2307 Columbine. durangocafeauplay.org.

Baby Meetup, 9:30-11:30 a.m., Columbine House at Unitarian Universalist Fellowship, 419 San Juan Dr.

Durango Early Bird Toastmasters, 7-8:30 a.m., LPEA, 45 Stewart St. 769-7615.

Free yoga, 8:30-9:30 a.m., Lively Boutique, 809 Ave. Book Walks, meet at Ignacio Library for carpool at 9:15 a.m. or at Little Bear Trailhead for walk back to library at 9:30 a.m. 563-9287.

Zumba Gold, 9:30-10:15 a.m., La Plata Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave.

Toddler Storytime, 10:30 a.m., Durango Library.

Open Art Studio, 10 a.m., Ignacio Library.

Luminaries Toastmasters, open to all, noon, La Plata County Administration Building, 1101 E. 2nd Ave. Office Hours with La Plata County Commissioner Julie Westendorff, 1 p.m., Pine River Library.

Drop-in Tennis, all ages, 4 p.m., Fort Lewis College.

Kidz Klub, 4 p.m., Ignacio Library. 563-9287.

Submit “On the Town” items by Monday at noon to: calendar@durangotelegraph.com

Friday21

Storytime, 10:30-11 a.m., Durango Public Library.

Comedy Cocktail open mic stand up, 8 p.m., Eno Wine Bar, 723 E. 2nd Ave. Ugly Sweater Contest, featuring live music and dancing, 9 p.m.-close, plus all-day food drive to benefit Manna Soup Kitchen, Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Sunday23

The Black Velvet Duo performs, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave.

Henry Stoy performs, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-Pierre Café, 601 Main Ave. 570-650-5982.

Open Mic, 5:30-8 p.m., sign up noon-4 p.m.; Smiley Cafe, 1309 E. 3rd Ave. Sign up at 403-5572.

Blue Moon Ramblers, 7 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave.

The Animas Jazz Trio, 6-9 p.m., Jean-Pierre Café, 601 Main Ave. 570-650-5982.

Monday24 Christmas Eve

Funk Jam with Bootyconda, 6-9 p.m., Kaztro performs, 9 p.m., with all day food drive benefit for Manna Soup Kitchen, Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Gary B. Walker performs, 6:30-8:30 p.m., Jean-Pierre Café, 601 Main Ave. 570-650-5982.

Teen Game Night, 7-10 p.m., Mancos Library.

Laugh Therapy, stand-up comedy open mic, sign up, 7 p.m., show starts, 8 p.m., Irish Embassy, 900 Main Ave.

Ecstatic Dance with DJ Codestar, 7-10:30 p.m., YogaDurango on Florida Road.

Cherry Poppin’ Daddies’ WWII Xmas Canteen, 7:30 p.m., Dec. 20, Community Concert Hall at Fort Lewis College. www.durangoconcerts.com.

Saturday22

“Sea Gypsies: The Far Side of the World” documentary, 7:30 p.m., Sunflower Theater in Cortez.

Henry Stoy performs, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-Pierre Café, 601 Main Ave. 570-650-5982.

Open Mic & Stand-Up, 8 p.m., El Rancho Tavern, 975 Main Ave.

VFW Indoor Flea Market, 10 a.m.-4 p.m., 1550 Main Ave. 247-0384.

18 n Dec. 20, 2018

Ute Storytelling, 5-7 p.m., Southern Ute Museum in Ignacio. www.southernutemuseum.org.

The Black Velvet Duo performs, 7 p.m., The Office, 699 Main Ave.

Spanish Speaking Parents & Littles Fridays, 3:30-5:30 p.m., Durango Café au Play, 1309 E. 3rd Ave., Room 201. durangocafeauplay.org.

“All In” Matchstick Productions ski film fundraiser for Four Corners Freeride Team, 6:30 and 8:30 p.m., Durango Arts Center, 802 E. 2nd Ave.

Santa Claus on the Mountain, 2-3:30 p.m., The Beach at Purgatory Resort. www.purgatoryresort.com.

Lactation Support, 10 a.m.-noon, Prenatal Yoga, noon-1 p.m., Durango Café au Play, 1309 E. 3rd Ave., Room 201. 749-9607 or durangocafeauplay.org.

Leah Orlikowsi performs, 5-7 p.m., Ska Brewing, 225 Girard St.

Sitting Meditation, 5:30-6:15 p.m., Durango Dharma Center, 1800 E. 3rd Ave.

“Love Actually,” matinee 2 p.m., Pine River Library.

Kirk James performs, 6-10 p.m., Seven Rivers Steakhouse at Sky Ute Casino in Ignacio.

STEAM Lab: Glitter Jars, ages 5-12, 3:30-4:30 p.m., Durango Public Library.

Death Café, gathering to talk about death and dying, 5:30 p.m., Mancos Public Library. 533-7600.

Bolshoi Ballet’s “The Nutcracker,” 12:55 p.m., show also runs Dec. 23, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Drive. www.animascitythe atre.com.

Intermediate Tai Chi, 10-11 a.m., Durango Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave.

“Doc Swords,” PTSD Social Club for Veterans, 4-6 p.m., VFW, 1550 Main Ave.

Santa Terry Ricard performs, 5-8 p.m., Digs Restaurant, Three Springs.

Sensory Storytime, for children on the autism spectrum and differently abled children, 10:30-11:30 a.m., Durango Public Library.

Yoga Storytime, 9:30-10:45 a.m., Smiley Building Studio 10, 1309 E. 3rd Ave. Watch Your Step class, 10:15 a.m., Durango Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave. Monday Music, 10:30 a.m., Durango Café au Play, 1309 E. 3rd Ave., Room 201. durangocafeauplay.org.

Trivia Night, 7 p.m., Blondies in Cortez.

Drop-in Tennis, all ages, 9 a.m., Durango High.

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Learn to Square Dance, with Wild West Squares, 78:30 p.m., Florida Grange, 656 Hwy 172. 903-6478.

Tuesday25 Christmas Day

Wednesday26

Snow Sculptures in the Plaza, Dec. 26-29, Purgatory Resort. www.purgatoryresort.com.

Intermediate Tai Chi, 10:30 a.m., Durango Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave.

Black Velvet Duo performs, 7 p.m., Derailed Pour House, 725 Main Ave.

Free Trauma Conscious Yoga for Veterans and Families, noon-1 p.m., Elks Lodge, 901 E. 2nd Ave.

Saturday29

Open Knitting Group, 1-3 p.m., Smiley Café, 1309 E. 3rd Ave.

ICL MakerSpace, 10 a.m., Ignacio Library. 563-9287.

Henry Stoy performs, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-Pierre Café, 601 Main Ave. 570-650-5982.

Free Trauma Conscious Yoga for Veterans and Families, noon-1 p.m., Elks Lodge, 901 E. 2nd Ave.

VFW Indoor Flea Market, 10 a.m.-4 p.m., 1550 Main Ave. 247-0384.

Fenceline Cider featured, noon-3 p.m., The Beach at Purgatory Resort.

Thank the Veterans potluck, Peter Neds and Glenn Keefe perform, 5:30-8:30 p.m., VFW, 1550 Main Ave.

Bluegrass Jam, 6-8 p.m., downstairs at The Irish Embassy, 900 Main Ave.

Black Velvet Duo performs, 6 p.m., Seven Rivers Steakhouse, Sky Ute Casino in Ignacio.

Ongoing

Jess Wilton & Erik Nordstrom perform, 5-7 p.m., Fenceline Cidery in Mancos.

Thursday27

Beginner Tai Chi, 9:15 a.m., Durango Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave.

Blue Moon Ramblers, 7 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave.

Baby Meetup, 9:30-11:30 a.m., Columbine House at Unitarian Universalist Fellowship, 419 San Juan Dr.

Monday31

“Doc Swords,” PTSD Social Club for Veterans, 4-6 p.m., VFW, 1550 Main Ave.

Fireworks & Torchlight Parade, 6-6:30 p.m., Night Rail Jam, 6:30-8 p.m., People We Know performs, 9 p.m.-1 a.m., Purgatory Resort. www.purgatoryresort.com.

Robby Overfield performs, 5-7 p.m., Ska Brewing, 225 Girard St.

New Year’s Eve with Elder Grown, J-Calvin, and Mesquite, doors open, 8 p.m., show begins, 9 p.m., The Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Drive.

Sitting Meditation, 5:30-6:15 p.m., Durango Dharma Center, 1800 E. 3rd Ave.

The Black Velvet Duo performs, 9 p.m., The Derailed Pour House, 725 Main Ave.

Karaoke, 8 p.m.-close, Wild Horse, 601 E. 2nd Ave.

Little Readers, stories, activities and crafts, 10:30 a.m., Pine River Library in Bayfield.

Open Art Studio, 10 a.m., Ignacio Community Library.

Open Mic, 5:30-8 p.m., Smiley Cafe, 1309 E. 3rd Ave. Sign up noon-4 p.m. or at 403-5572.

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Wednesday02 Free Kids Yoga with Joy Kilpatrick, ages 3-7, 9-9:45 a.m., Pediatric Associates, 1199 Main Ave., Suite 205.

Zumba Gold, 9:30-10:15 a.m., La Plata Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave.

Intermediate Tai Chi, 10:30 a.m., Durango Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave.

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Karaoke, 8 p.m., Thur-Sun, 8th Ave. Tavern, 509 E 8th.

Upcoming Writers’ Workshop, Jan. 6 and 20, Ignacio Library.

Super Ted’s Super Trivia, 6:12 p.m., Jan. 8, Henry Strater Theatre, 699 Main Ave. 769-4174 or www.henrystratertheatre.com.

“The Landing of the Mary Jane,” opening reception, 7-8:30 p.m., Jan. 9, Durango & Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad & Museum. www.durangotrain.com.

Supersuckers perform, 9 p.m., Jan. 11, Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Dr. www.animascitytheatre.com.

New Year’s Day

Durango Early Bird Toastmasters, 7-8:30 a.m., LPEA, 45 Stewart St. 769-7615.

Live music, nightly, Diamond Belle & The Office, 699 Main Ave.

Geeks Who Drink Trivia, 6:30 p.m., Jan. 9, BREW Pub & Kitchen, 117 W. College Dr. 259-5959.

Tuesday01

Friday28

Free Morning Yoga with YogaDurango, 8:30-9:30 a.m., Saturdays and Sundays, Durango Mountain Institute at Purgatory.

Funk Jam with Bootyconda, 6-9 p.m., Kaztro performs, 9 p.m., Jan. 4, Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

New Year’s Eve

Office Hour with City Councilor Dick White, 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m., City Hall, 949 2nd Ave.

Karaoke, 8 p.m., Blondies in Cortez.

Karaoke with Crazy Charlie, 8 p.m.-close, Wild Horse Saloon, 601 E. 2nd Ave.

Henry Stoy performs, 10 a.m.-1 p.m., Jean-Pierre Café, 601 Main Ave. 570-650-5982.

Karaoke with Crazy Charlie, 8 p.m.-close, Wild Horse Saloon, 601 E. 2nd Ave.

Pub Quiz, 6:30 p.m., Irish Embassy, 900 Main Ave.

Sensory Storytime, for children on the autism spectrum, 10:30-11:30 a.m., Durango Public Library.

Sunday30

Pub Quiz, 6:30 p.m., Irish Embassy, 900 Main Ave.

Thank the Veterans potluck, Peter Neds and Glenn Keefe perform, 5:30-8:30 p.m., VFW, 1550 Main. 828-7777.

The Met: Live in HD, featuring “Adriana Lecouvreur,” 10:55 a.m., Jan. 12, Student Union at FLC. Snowdown 2019, Get Your ComicOn, Jan. 30-Feb. 3. www.snowdown.org.

An Evening with Chris Robinson Brotherhood, doors open, 8:30 p.m., show begins, 9:30 p.m., Feb. 3, The Animas City Theatre, 128 E. College Drive.

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FreeWillAstrology

by Rob Brezsny ARIES (March 21-April 19): Consumer Reports says that between 1975 - 2008, the average number of products for sale in a supermarket rose from about 9,000 to nearly 47,000. The glut is holding steady. Years ago you selected from among three or four brands of soup and shampoo. Nowadays you may be faced with 20 varieties of each. I suspect that 2019 will bring a comparable expansion in some of your life choices, Aries – especially when you’re deciding what to do with your future and who your allies should be. This could be both a problem and a blessing. For best results, opt for choices that have all three of these qualities: fun, usefulness and meaningfulness.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): People have been trying to convert ordinary metals into gold since at least 300 AD. At that time, an Egyptian alchemist named Zosimos of Panopolis unsuccessfully mixed sulfur and mercury in the hope of performing such magic.

Fourteen centuries later, seminal scientist Isaac Newton also failed in his efforts to produce gold from cheap metal. But now let’s fast forward to twentieth-century chemist Glenn T. Seaborg, a distinguished researcher who won a share of the Nobel Prize for Chemistry in 1951. He and his team did an experiment with bismuth, an element that’s immediately adjacent to lead on the periodical table. By using a particle accelerator, they literally transmuted a small quantity of bismuth into gold. I propose that we make this your teaching story for 2019. May it inspire you to seek transformations that have never before been possible.

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GEMINI (May 21-June 20): United States President Donald Trump wants to build a concrete and fenced wall between Mexico and America, hoping to slow down the flow of immigrants across the border. Meanwhile, 12 Northern African countries are collaborating to build a 4,750-mile-long wall of drought-resistant trees at the border of the Sahara, hoping to stop the desert from swallowing up farmland. During the coming year, I’ll be rooting for you to draw inspiration from the latter, not the former.

Erecting new boundaries will be healthy for you – if it’s done out of love and for the sake of your health, not out of fear and divisiveness.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Cancerian poet and filmmaker Jean Cocteau advised artists to notice the aspects of their work that critics didn’t like – and then cultivate those precise aspects.

He regarded the disparaged or misconstrued elements as being key to an artist’s uniqueness and originality, even if they were as-yet immature. I’m expanding his

(Week of Dec. 20)

suggestion and applying it to all of you Crabs during the next 10 months, even if you’re not strictly an artist. Watch carefully what your community seems to misunderstand about the new trends you’re pursuing, and work hard to ripen them.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): In 1891, a 29-year-old British mother named Constance Garnett decided she would study the Russian language and become a translator. She learned fast.

During the next 40 years, she produced English translations of 71 Russian literary books, including works by Tolstoy, Dostoyevsky, Turgenev and Chekhov. Many had never before been rendered in English. I see 2019 as a Constance Garnetttype year for you, Leo. Any late-blooming potential you might possess could enter a period of rapid maturation. Awash in enthusiasm and ambition, you’ll have the power to launch a new phase of development that could animate and motivate you for a long time.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): I’ll be bold and predict that 2019 will be a nurturing chapter in your story; a time when you will feel loved and supported to a greater degree than usual; a phase when you will be more at home in your body and more at peace with your fate than you have in a long time. I have chosen an appropriate blessing to bestow upon you, written by the poet Claire Wahmanholm. Speak her words as if they were your own. “On Earth I am held, honeysuckled not just by honeysuckle but by everything – marigolds, bog after bog of small sundews, the cold smell of spruce.”

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): “Be very, very careful what you put into that head, because you will never, ever get it out.” This advice is sometimes attributed to sixteenth-century politician and cardinal Thomas Wolsey.

Now I’m offering it to you as one of your important themes in 2019. Here’s how you can best take it to heart. First, be extremely discerning about what ideas, theories and opinions you allow to flow into your imagination. Make sure they’re based on objective facts and make sure they’re good for you. Second, be aggressive about purging old ideas, theories and opinions from your head, especially if they’re outmoded, unfounded or toxic.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Memorize this quote by author Peter Newton and keep it close to your awareness during the coming months: “No remorse. No if-onlys. Just the alertness of being.” Here’s another useful maxim, this one from author Mignon McLaughlin: “Every day of our lives we are on the verge of making those slight changes that would make all the difference.” Shall we make it a lucky three mottoes to live by in 2019?

telegraph

This one’s by author A. A. Milne: “You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.”

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22Dec. 21): Until 1920, most American women didn’t have the right to vote. For that matter, few had ever been candidates for public office. There were exceptions. In 1866, Elizabeth Cady Stanton was the first to seek a seat in Congress. In 1875, Victoria Woodhull ran for president.

Susanna Salter became the first woman mayor in 1887. According to my analysis of the astrological omens, Sagittarius, 2019 will be a Stanton-Woodhull-Salter type of year for you. You’re likely to be ahead of your time and primed to innovate. You’ll have the courage and resourcefulness necessary to try seemingly unlikely and unprecedented feats, and you’ll have a knack for ushering the future into the present.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Studies show that the best possible solution to the problem of homelessness is to provide cheap or free living spaces for the homeless. Not only is it the most effective way of helping the people involved; in the long run, it’s also the least expensive. Is there a comparable problem in your personal life? A chronic difficulty that you keep putting band-aids on but that never gets much better? I’m happy to inform you that 2019 will be a favorable time to dig down to find deeper, more fundamental solutions; to finally fix a troublesome issue rather than just addressing its symptoms.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Many people in Iceland write poems, but only a few publish them. There’s even a term for those who put their creations away in a drawer rather than seeking an audience: “skúffuskáld,” literally translated as “drawer-poet.” Is there a comparable phenomenon in your life, Aquarius? Do you produce some good thing but never share it? Is there a part of you that you’re proud of but keep secret?

Is there an aspect of your ongoing adventures that’s meaningful but mostly private? If so, 2019 will be the year you might want to change your mind about it.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Scientists at Goldsmiths University in London did a study to determine the catchiest pop song ever recorded. After extensive research in which they evaluated an array of factors, they decided that Queen’s “We Are the Champions” is the song that more people love to sing than any other. This triumphant tune happens to be your theme song in 2019. I suggest you learn the lyrics and melody, and sing it once every day. It should help you build on the natural confidence-building influences that will be streaming into your life.

FreeWillAstrology

by Rob Brezsny ARIES (March 21-April 19): I suspect that in 2019 you’ll be able to blend a knack for creating more stability with an urge to explore and seek greater freedom. How might this unusual confluence be expressed in practical ways? Maybe you’ll travel to reconnect with your ancestral roots. Or perhaps a faraway ally or influence will help you feel more at home in the world. It’s possible you’ll establish a stronger foundation, which will in turn bolster your courage and inspire you to break free of a limitation. What do you think?

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): On the average, a total eclipse of the sun happens every 18 months. And how often is a total solar eclipse visible from a specific location on the planet? Typically, once every 375 years. In 2019, the magic moment will occur July 2 for people living in Chile and Argentina. But I believe that throughout the coming year, Tauruses all over the world will experience other kinds of rare and wonderful events at a higher rate than usual. Not eclipses, but rather divine interventions, mysterious miracles, catalytic epiphanies, unexpected breakthroughs and amazing graces.

Expect more of the marvelous than you’re accustomed to.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “The world’s full of people who have stopped listening to themselves,” wrote mythologist Joseph Campbell. It’s imperative that you NOT be one of those folks. 2019 should be the Year of Listening Deeply to Yourself. That means being on high alert for your inner inklings, your unconscious longings, and the still, small voice at the heart of your destiny. If you do that, you’ll discover I’m right when I say that you’re smarter than you realize.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): Jackson Pollock is regarded as a pioneer in the technique of drip painting, which involves drizzling and splashing paint on canvases that lie on the floor. It made him famous. But the truth is, Pollock got inspired to pursue what became known as his signature style only after he saw an exhibit by the artist Janet Sobel, who was the real pioneer. I bring this to your attention, because I see 2019 as a year when the Janet Sobel-like aspects of your life will get their due. Overdue appreciation will arrive. Credit you have deserved but haven’t fully garnered will finally come your way.

You’ll be acknowledged and recognized in surprising ways.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): As the crow flies, Wyoming is almost a thousand miles from the Pacific Ocean and more than a thousand miles from

(Week of Dec. 27)

the Gulf of Mexico, which is part of the Atlantic Ocean. Now here’s a surprise: in the northwest corner of Wyoming, the North Two Ocean Creek divides into two tributaries, one of which ultimately flows to the Pacific and one that reaches the Gulf. So an enterprising fish could conceivably swim from one ocean to the other via this waterway. I propose that we make North Two Ocean Creek your official metaphor for 2019. It will symbolize the turning point you’ll be at in your life; it will remind you that you’ll have the power to launch an epic journey in one of two directions.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): I have come to the conclusion that softening your relationship with perfectionism will be a key assignment in 2019.

With this in mind, I offer you observations from wise people who have studied the subject. 1. “The perfect is the enemy of the good.” – Voltaire 2. “Perfection is a stick with which to beat the possible.” – Rebecca Solnit 3. Perfectionism is “the high-end version of fear.” – Elizabeth Gilbert 4. “Nothing is less efficient than perfectionism.” – Elizabeth Gilbert 4. “It’s better to live your own life imperfectly than to imitate someone else’s perfectly.” – Elizabeth Gilbert LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): In 1682, Peter Alexeyevich became co-Tsar of Russia. He was 10 years old. His 24-year-old half-sister Sophia had a hole cut in the back of his side of the dual throne. That way she could sit behind him, out of sight, and whisper guidance as he discussed political matters with allies.

I’d love it if you could wangle a comparable arrangement for yourself in 2019. Are there wise confidants or mentors or helpers from whom you could draw continuous counsel? Seek them out.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): The body of the violin has two f-shaped holes on either side of the strings. They enable the sound that resonates inside the instrument to be projected outwardly. A thousand years ago, the earliest ancestor of the modern violin had round holes. Later they became halfmoons, then c-shaped, and finally evolved into the f-shape. Why the change? Scientific analysis reveals that the modern form allows more air to be pushed out from inside the instrument, thereby producing a more powerful sound. My analysis of your life in 2019 suggests it will be a time to make an upgrade from your metaphorical equivalent of the c-shaped holes to the fshaped holes. A small shift like that will enable you to generate more power and resonance.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22Dec. 21): Sagittarian singersongwriter Sia has achieved great success, garnering nine Grammy nominations and

amassing a $20 million fortune. Among the superstars for whom she has composed hit tunes are Beyoncé, Rihanna and Flo Rida. But she has also had failures. Top recording artists like Adele and Shakira have commissioned her to write songs for them only to subsequently turn down what she created. In 2016, Sia got sweet revenge. She released an album in which she herself sang many of those rejected songs. It has sold more than 2 million copies. Do you, too, know what it’s like to have your gifts and skills ignored or unused or rebuffed, Sagittarius? If so, the coming months will be an excellent time to express them for your own benefit, as Sia did.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): A typical fluffy white cumulus cloud weighs 216,000 pounds. A dark cumulonimbus storm cloud is 106 million pounds, almost 490 times heavier.

Why? Because it’s filled with far more water than the white cloud. So which is better, the fluffy cumulus or the stormy cumolonimbus? Neither, of course. We might sometimes prefer the former over the latter because it doesn’t darken the sky as much or cause the inconvenience of rain. But the truth is, the cumulonimbus is a blessing; a substantial source of moisture; a gift to growing things. I mention this because I suspect that for you, 2019 will have more metaphorical resemblances to the cumulonimbus than the cumulus.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): A hundred years ago, most astronomers thought there was just one galaxy in the universe: our Milky Way. Other models for the structure of the universe were virtually heretical. But in the 1920s, astronomer Edwin Hubble produced research that proved the existence of many more galaxies. Today the estimate is that there are at least 400 billion. I wonder what currently unimaginable possibilities will be obvious to our ancestors a hundred years from now. Likewise, I wonder what currently unforeseen truths will be fully available to you by the end of 2019. My guess: more than in any other previous year of your life.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Author Elizabeth Gilbert offers advice for those who long for a closer relationship with the Supreme Being: “Look for God like a man with his head on fire looks for water.” I’ll expand that approach so it applies to you when you’re in quest of any crucial life-enhancing experience. If you genuinely believe that a particular adventure or relationship or transformation is key to your central purpose, it’s not enough to be mildly enthusiastic about it. You really do need to seek your heart’s desire in the way people with their heads on fire look for water. 2019 will be prime time for you to embody this understanding.

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classifieds

Deadline for Telegraph classified ads is Tuesday at noon.

Ads are a bargain at 10 cents a character with a $5 minimum. Even better, ads can now be placed online: durangotelegraph.com. Prepayment is required via cash, credit card or check.

(Sorry, no refunds or substitutions.)

Ads can be submitted via: n classifieds@durango telegraph.com n 970-259-0133 n 777 Main Ave., #214 Approximate office hours: Mon., 9ish - 5ish Tues., 9ish - 5ish Wed., 9ish - 3ish Thurs., On delivery Fri., 10:30ish - 2ish please call ahead: 259-0133.

Announcements The Durango Voice is Back!

Calling all vocalists! The Durango Voice (a fundraiser for Manna) is calling for auditions! If you would like to participate in this very popular event and “funraiser,” submit your 2-min song in mp3 format by Jan. 11. Include your name, phone, email & short bio. Send to duran govoice2@gmail.com. Live blind auditions will be held Feb. 24 at the Strater Theatre.

Nayda’s Art Holiday Prices - Bold and bright water colors – “Making visual happiness” – Enjoy coffee, conversation and the art show at Fahrenheit Espresso Bar – 201 West Grand Avenue, Mancos, Colorado.

The Perfect Gift for your favorite dirtbag. Literature from Durango’s own Benighted Publications. The Climbing Zine, The Great American Dirtbags, American Climber, Climbing Out of Bed and Graduating From College Me are available at: Maria’s Bookshop, Pine Needle Mountaineering, the Sky Store, or on the interweb at www.climbingzine.com.

Wanted Turn Vehicles, Copper, Alum, Etc. Into Cash! at RJ Metal Recycle, also free appliance and other metal drop off. 970-259-3494.

HelpWanted 6th Street Liquors is Hiring 6th Street Liquors at 273 E. College Dr. is hiring. Part time & full time evening shifts avail. Shifts are from 5pm-12am.

22 n Dec. 20, 2018

Come in for an interview between 9:30am-4:00pm Mon-Fri with resume or drop off resume. Please, no calls

Affordable Website Management 99SiteCare provides quality, experienced WordPress website management for businesses. 100% US based. Quarterly, semi-annual, annual plans available.

KDUR Radio is Looking for Someone to fill the community member position on our Community Advisory Board.

This person should live in La Plata County and be a regular listener to KDUR Radio. Monthly meetings/assistance at fund-raisers and miscellaneous duties are the commitment. Interested parties email Liggett_b@fortlewis.edu

Advanced Duct Cleaning Air duct cleaning specializing in dryer vents. Improves indoor air quality; reduces dust and allergens, energy bills and fire risk. 970-247-2462 www.advanced ductcleaninginc.com

Classes/Workshops

BodyWork

Yoga for Cancer Looking for 3 clients to participate in 6 Yoga for Cancer sessions, late January-mid March 2019. $15/session, sliding scale offered. For details contact Emily at 615-5565951 or apanatherapeutics@gmail.com.

Holiday Special A therapeutic massage, best gift ever 20% off now through Christmas duran gomobilemassage.com

Give the Gift of Music!

Flying Picards Studio of Music Etc. Piano, flute, sax, ukulele lessons. All ages. French tutoring and classes. 390 E. 12th Street. 970-764-7443 or 970-2594383. Experienced teacher. Need holiday music for a party? We’re versatile and entertaining.

Mommy and Me Dance Class Come join the fun! Now registering for classes. Call 970-749-6456. mom myandmedance.com.

Services House Keeper Professional, detailed, reliable, local references Barbara 516-480-8343.

Harmony Organizing and Cleaning Services Home and office 970-403-6192.

Organic Spray Tans!

Glow for the Holidays! Meg Bush, LMT 970-759-0199.

Low Price on Storage!

Inside/outside near Durango, RJ Mini Storage. 970-259-3494.

telegraph

partiers. Available mid January. $1,750 per month plus deposit. 759-0254.

Professional Roommate Wanted Professional wanted to share downtown Durango MT office w/ riverfront entrance & free parking. $365/mo. katie@durango bodyrolling.com for info.

CommercialForRent Cute Office to Share Office available weekdays until 4pm.

Set up well for therapist or health consultant. 1911 Main Ave, Suite 240. $190 per month. 946-1345.

RoommateWanted

massageintervention.life Voted best massage in Durango 2018.

Couples, sauna, outdoor shower, cupping. Reviews on FB + Yelp. 970-9032984.

Male Roommate Wanted Male roommate to share quiet house in town. No smokers, parties. $550 per month, $600 refundable deposit, $50 cleaning fee non-refundable. 759-0254.

Insight Cranial Sacral Therapy Quiet, relaxing, deep. Don 970-7698389.

ISO Prof. Female Furn. 1 BR on the Animas. No smking/pets. $600/mo. incl. util. https:// bit.ly/2Ljezw4. 749-8327.

Massage Gift Certificates!

30, 60 & 90 min Meg Bush, LMT 970759-0199.

ForSale

Massage with Kathryn 20+ years experience offering a fusion of esalen style, deep tissue massage with therapeutic stretching & Acutonics. New clients receive $5 off first session. To schedule appt. call 970-201-3373.

RealEstate Radon Services Free radon testing and consultation.

Call Colorado Radon Abatement and Detection for details. 970- 946-1618.

ForRent House in Town 4 bedroom, 2 bath house in nice neighborhood for rent. No pets, smokers,

Red Cliffs Pottery Holiday Sale Local handmade pottery, lg selection!

Come see us at 1375 Florida Rd. Mon-Sat, 9-5, Sun. by appt only. Call 970-7648229.

Colorado Paddle Boards Make Great Gifts!

Free shipping to any location in the USA. Boards in stock at the Durango Outdoor Exchange.

Hot Tub – New 6HP pump, 50 jets. Cost $8,000. Sell $3,650. 505-270-3104.

Reruns – Two Stores to Choose From The holidays are here! We have dishes, linens, serving ware and cool furniture.

Beautiful new arrivals – several Pier One cabinets, stained glass, lamps, nice rugs, lots of cool art (local as well), and beverage fridge. 572 E. 6th Ave. 385-7336.

AskRachel Interesting fact: Believe it or not, a century ago, whitetail deer were pretty much wiped out across the country. They’ve since staged a comeback, thanks in no small part to the back streets of Durango.

printed address labels and not so much as a hand-scrawled signature. What is wrong with people who can’t send a simple card with at least your name personalized on it?

– Photo-Bombed

Dear Rachel, I have a horrible confession to make. Every year during the family get-together, I fake my period. I start complaining maybe two days before so my kids and my hubby can note my distress. Then, anywhere from 30-45 minutes into the family get-together, I excuse myself and head home to a carton of egg nog and a flask of Jack. It’s my holiday gift to myself. So I’m wondering, can you recommend anything else to make my me-day even merrier and brighter?

- Ho Ho Solo

Dear Current Resident, You’re thinking about this all wrong. You’re being given the perfect opportunity to pretend you are far more social than you are. Most of us are stuck buying picture frames and leaving in the photos of the models if we want our home decor to appear non-psychopathic.

You, on the other hand, have a custom-made refrigerator mosaic that will last you the whole year through (or even longer if you cover up the “2018” with fridge magnets). It’s the gift that keeps on giving.

– Say cheese, Rachel

Dear Menstrual Krampus, My god. You’re like the Grinch, only more magnificent. He stole Christmas from the Whos. You’re stealing Christmas for yourself. I think this plan of yours is a more genius way to escape the fam than the traditional let’s-go-to-a-Christmas-afternoon-movie. Honestly? The only ways I can see to improve your day are a second carton of nog. And maybe some lactose pills.

– Bottoms up, Rachel Dear Rachel, I am fed up with Christmas cards that arrive at my house showing smiling faces of people I hardly know, babies I’ve never met, and cats I’ll never pet. I’m supposed to feel touched that someone thought of me during the holidays. But these atrocities always arrive with computer-

Dear Rachel, The deer in my neighborhood have killed at least two dogs now this year. I know we’re supposed to live in harmony with the wildlife, and I’m as pacifist as any non-vegan, but this situation is getting seriously out of control. Heck, I would run over the deer myself, if I could afford the body shop repair fees. Is there something I can do to deter these pests from town, or at least keep them away from my own dog’s yard?

– Deer Hunter Dear John, Well, this decidedly holiday-flavored Ask Rachel just took a turn for the morbid. I’m with you that the deer are menaces (unless they’re not, but you never know from moment to moment). They’re really dangerous in

Jonesing?

Email Rachel at telegraph@durangotelegraph.com mating season though. I can’t authorize you to shoot them or run them down like Santa’s retired reindeer. But maybe you can fake a period. That seems to keep all kinds of trouble at bay.

– In heat, Rachel

HaikuMovieReview ‘The Ballad of Buster Scruggs’ As usual, the brothers Coen both tickle and punch the viewer

– Lainie Maxson

Drinking&DiningGuide Himalayan Kitchen 992 Main Ave., 970-259-0956 www.himkitchen.com Bringing you a taste of Nepal, Tibet & India. Try our all-you-can-eat lunch buffet. The dinner menu offers a variety of tempting choices, including yak, lamb, chicken, beef & seafood; extensive veggies; freshly baked bread. Full bar. Get your lunch punch card – 10th lunch free.

Hours: Lunch, 11am-2:30 p.m. & dinner, Sun. - Thurs., 5-9:30 p.m., Fri. & Sat. ‘til 10 p.m. Closed 2:30 to 5 daily $$ Crossroads Coffee 1099 Main Ave., 970-903-9051 Crossroads coffee proudly serves locally roasted Fahrenheit coffee and delicious baked goods. Menu includes gluten-free items along with bullet-proof coffee, or bullet-proof chai! Eggnog lattes are here! Come in for friendly service and the perfect buzz!

Hours: Mon.- Fri., 7 a.m. - 4 p.m. $

Issue 6 is now out!

Wherever you find the Telegraph or at www.gulchmag.com.

To find out about advertising opportunities, email steve@gulchmag.com

BREW Pub & Kitchen 117 W. College Drive, 970-259-5959 www.brewpubkitchen.com Experience Durango’s award-winning brewery & restaurant featuring unique, hand-crafted beers, delicious food - made from scratch, and wonderful wines & cocktails. Happy Hour, Tues.- Fri. 4-6 pm & all day Sunday with $1 off beers, wines & wells & select appetizers at 20% off. Watch the sunset behind Smelter Mountain.

Hours: Wed.-Sun., Noon - 9p.m., Tues. 4p.m. - 9 p.m. Closed on Mon. $$

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Dec. 20, 2018 n 23

24 n Dec. 20, 2018

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