The Durango Telegraph, Jan. 5, 2023

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Party

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Bagging it

Top albums of 2022 continues with punk supergroup, hip hop geniuses by Jon E. Lynch

9 Ruling

the roost

Ear to the Ground

Durango Telegraph 4 La Vida Local 4 Thumbin’ It 5 Land Desk 6-7 Soap Box 7 State News 8 Local News 9 Kill Yr Idols 10 Murder Ink 12-13 Stuff to Do 13 Ask Rachel 14 Free Will Astrology 15 Classifieds 15 Haiku Movie Review“I’m torn between being a bad influence on other people’s lives and never feeling sad again.”

– Deciding on New Year’s resolutions can be difficult with so many options.

Welcome to Durango

the pole

If you have something to say about the state of tourism in Durango (and we know you do), now is the time to speak up.

Thursday, come hell, high water, tacky singletrack RegularOccurrences Jan. 5, 2023 n 3The City of Durango recently announced the “Resident Sentiment Survey” is now open for all county residents to weigh in, which aims to “monitor resident opinions on tourism in La Plata County over time.”

Of course, Durango has been a tourist economy for decades. But with the surge of visitors as a result of the pandemic, local officials have boosted efforts to gauge the town’s pulse on the effects of so many visitors.

After entering some personal info on how long you’ve lived in Durango, the survey asks questions about how much you know about the lodgers tax. The quick and dirty: the lodgers tax is a tax paid by visitors on hotel rooms, vacation rentals and commercial campsites.

About 55% of the tax revenue goes to increase tourism efforts, 20% for city transit and 14% for arts and culture projects (the remaining balance is left to the City Council on how to spend). In 2021, Durango voters approved an increase of the lodgers tax from 2% to 5.25%.

Back to the survey, residents are asked whether tourism is good for La Plata County, whether they believe the tourism industry is strong and whether “tourism improves my quality of life in La Plata County.”

monster powder days. We are wholly independently owned and operated by the Durango Telegraph LLC and distributed in the finest and most dis10It also asks whether residents believe Visit Durango, the organization in charge of tourism efforts, is doing a good job of sustainable tourism management and marketing (think those “responsible tourism” signs you’ve seen around town). Indeed, since the pandemic rush of visitors, especially to the backcountry, Visitor Durango has made it a priority to put out messaging to encourage more responsible behavior, like don’t drive your ATV off trail and pack out your poop.

The survey also seeks to gauge whether residents are “satisfied with the balance of positive impacts to negative impacts of tourism,” and whether you’d like to see more tourists coming to La Plata County during off-peak seasons (November-April).

One of the harder questions we found was whether “the sales and lodging tax that tourist pays on their purchases adequately compensates for the wear and tear they create on our infrastructure and outdoor recreation areas.”

All in all, the survey took about 10-15 minutes. And hey, you’ll also be entered to win a $50 gift certificate to a local shop or restaurant. Check it out here: bit.ly/3i8uW3j

telegraph

How to shed the world

Maybe it’s the way snow sparkles as it dances through the streetlights, but there’s something enchanting about being in downtown Durango during those early moments of snow arriving. Especially on a Friday night of a dying year. Especially if you’re pulling tarot cards at The Office with an enchanting friend.

I pulled the Scorpio card, and as Cristen was telling me the meaning of it, I looked out the window and was held in that moment of cinematic serenity. The song “Faintly Falling Ashes” by The Lawrence Arms immediately leapt into my chest. “All those days that burned inside us swell up in the silence / Of snowflakes falling magically,” croons guitarist Chris McCaughan. The song is an ode to winter, while also acting as an elegy, reflecting on death and mortality. It’s my kind of holiday song. As Cristen and I sat in that booth, looking out the window, another verse filled the air: “No thoughts of dying / no more selfloathing for today.” And then a realization came over me: that is how I wish to enter every new year; how I’d like to feel every day.

Lately, every month has felt like a year, with the specter of fascism continually haunting our anemic democracy. Some nights I find myself exhausted from a heart that won’t stop bleeding. As much as I would like to carry on the days without death as a thought or threat on loved ones, the world reminds me how unavoidable that is. But I appreciate the joy found in celebrating a new year. It’s a transformation, with the hope that the sunrise will bring something better.

Much of The Lawrence Arms’ music grapples with self-loathing and ennui. It’s something I can relate to. So when McCaughan sings, “No more self-loathing for today,” it’s coming from someone who has devoted many lyric-filled notebooks to the topic. He’s giving himself, as well as the listener, permission to let that feeling die, to let it be buried in the snow globe moment. After that lyric, there’s an instrumental break. The guitars and drums are in contemplative conversation. To me it sounds like the whole band is holding onto that fleeting moment. I say fleeting because there’s a somber tone to the guitars, as if they know this comfort will only last as long as melting snow.

We live in an unwell country that thrives on violence and exploitation. Our imperialist power-system prioritizes war and policing over shelter and universal health care. Traffic lights and time clocks pull at our teeth on a daily grind. The

Thumbin’It

The latest atmospheric river event which brought copious amounts of moisture to SW Colorado and one of the more generous ski/shovel/sleep repeat cycles in recent memory Colorado’s new state law charging 10 cents for plastic bags going into effect. Slogan suggestion: “Don’t be a dope, bring a tote.”

Boulder Public Library reopening after traces of meth were found in air sampling. This is … good news?

demand of being overworked while underpaid, an act of survival for many, makes it difficult to access our creative, communal instincts. There’s also the toxic culture behind the screens we stare into, where algorithms reinforce the synthetic status quo. Within the cage of capitalism, we’re born into self-loathing.

It might take me a lifetime to unlearn that mindset. But when I listen to that song declare a strike on self-loathing, it’s a moment of refuge and relief.

It’s my ritual to play that song during the season of festive snow. But there’s another holiday track that gets repeated plays for the celebration of dying calendars, “One Hundred Resolutions.” It’s a song that, in its grimy glory, brings to life the magic of a transformative event. Once again McCaughan is reflecting on a destructive, directionless year of “accidental aspirations,” where he “laughed too late / and dug (himself) into a grave.” Backed by abrasive, highly charged drums and guitars, the song reckons with a year of bad luck. But the chorus seeks to reclaim dignity and empowerment: “This year I’ll try to stand up for myself / This year I’ll try not to drink so much.” It’s another attempt at working through destructive selfloathing, and there’s hope to be found in the confetti of a new year. Unlike the break in “Faintly Falling Ashes,” there’s an abundance of optimism in the interlude of “One Hundred Resolutions.” The muted guitars build up to an explosive outro chorus where McCaughan sings with conviction: “This year I’ll try to stand up straight / This year, let’s live like we’ve never lived before / This is our year for sure.”

The last two lines are clichés. And since the pandemic started, it feels impossible to embrace those statements. But in the context of this song, with the raw, romantic cadence of his vocals, it’s easy to believe. It’s magical when sappy clichés feel like truth. To believe we can begin again. To shed a dying world and rebuild.

And at its core, that’s what the start of a new year feels like: a collective renewal of optimism. That’s what I felt when Cristen and I left the bar that Friday night as people were making snow angels in the middle of the street. It was snow anarchy. But then, because everything is interconnected, I thought of the unhoused, and the city’s disregard for them. While refocusing on what needs love and healing within, it’s just as important to keep community in sight. To ask how can we do better to stand with the unsheltered, the undocumented, the unconsoled – those most vulnerable to a heartless system. A new year held in a new day is another chance to fight for a new world.

– Kirbie Bennett

SignoftheDownfall:

Aforementioned AR also bringing the great slushpocalpyse of ’23 to downtown streets and dangerous conditions to the backcountry

A report by Colorado Public Radio that said nearly one-third of students at Fort Lewis College have experienced homelessness.

The horrible situation after a Buffalo Bills player collapsed on the field Monday, going into cardiac arrest and is now in critical condition.

In response to the holidays airline cancellation fiasco, Larry Flynt’s Hustler Strip Club in Las Vegas announced this past week that anyone who could prove that their flight was canceled could call in and receive a free ride to the club, along with a waived cover charge, a free drink and a free lap dance. And yes, this is the same establishment that ran a free Covid vaccination clinic on 5/21 that featured dancers and discounted bottle service, which just goes to show that this place really is a “gentleman’s” club.

Southwaxed Hairlines

Another one bites the dust

Reeling in the last of last year’s big news: dying coal; uranium; and parking vs. people

by Jonathan Thompson

Happy New Year and welcome back to the Land Desk. We have some catching up to do on hibernation season news, so we’ll jump right in ...

Big Breakdown Ticker

San Juan Generating Station, one of the biggest coal power plants on the Colorado Plateau, is dead, along with efforts to revive the polluting behemoth and retrofit it with carbon capture equipment. After a series of legal defeats, the city of Farmington – which owns a 5% share of the plant – announced in December it was dropping its bid to take full ownership of the plant and turn it over to Enchant Energy.

Public Service Co. of New Mexico shut down the last unit of the plant in September and was moving forward with decommissioning, a decision the utility made back in 2017 for economic reasons. But Farmington continued its legal fight to take over the plant, even though Enchant’s $1.6-billion plan was deemed infeasible by multiple energy analysts and the company had repeatedly failed to meet critical benchmarks.

Now Farmington is out at least $2 million in legal costs, and it must play catchup on economic development efforts and to replace the power lost when the plant shut down. True to its fossil fuel favoritism, it looks like Farmington will build a new natural gas plant to fill some of the energy gap rather than more cost-effective solar. And instead of truly diversifying its economy, the city and region are hoping to continue relying on fossil fuels in the form of hydrogen production using the vast stores of methane as feedstock. Unfortunately, planned solar installations that would replace lost property tax revenues crucial for local schools have been delayed by supply chain constraints and inflation. And funds from the Energy Transition Act have also not yet been disbursed.

Enchant Energy, which sprouted from an obscure New York hedge fund in 2019 for no other reason than to keep the plant running (and polluting) while collecting hefty federal subsidies, says it is looking into taking its carbon capture projects elsewhere. In November, the Intermountain Power Association soundly rejected Enchant’s unsolicited bid to purchase retiring Utah power plants and keep them running, apparently to power data centers and/or cryptocurrency mining operations.

It wouldn’t surprise me if Enchant tried to shift its pipe dream … er, carbon capture plans … across the San Juan River to the Four Corners Power Plant, another major polluter that is headed toward retirement by the end of this decade. The Navajo Transitional Energy Company, or NTEC, which is owned by the tribe but acts independently, owns a small share of the plant and the Navajo Mine that feeds it, and so has an interest in keeping it running. NTEC also invested

an undisclosed amount into Enchant last year.

NTEC has been making the news elsewhere. The company is suing BNSF railway for allegedly breaching its contract to deliver coal from NTEC’s huge mines in Wyoming’s Powder River Basin to the West Coast. Yes, despite the “transitional” in its name, NTEC is one of the nation’s largest coal producers.

Meanwhile, NTEC is partnering with Arizona Lithium Limited to develop the Big Sandy mining project on Bureau of Land Management claims near Wikieup, Ariz. NTEC CEO Vern Lund sees the project as an opportunity for the company to delve into clean energy, which he says will “benefit native tribes.” But the Hualapai people may disagree: The tribe has been fighting the proposed mine since its inception because it would destroy hot springs and land the tribe holds sacred.

While coal may be declining, uranium seems to be on the move. The Department of Energy awarded contracts to four companies to supply product to the Federal Strategic Uranium Reserve. That includes $18.5 million to Energy Fuels – the owner of the White Mesa Mill near Blanding, Utah – and to Uranium Energy Corp. The companies both say they will use the proceeds to ramp up or reopen mines in Utah and Wyoming.

Parking vs. People

I can’t help it. I have to do an “I told you so” about one of my pet peeves: the parking space separation anxiety that plagues much of America, including my hometown of Durango. Just to recap: A lot of Duranga-

tans are freaking out about a proposed main drag makeover to make it more people-friendly because it might take away some precious parking, which they allege is in short supply. Well, it’s not. A comprehensive study by the City of Durango found that on average, only 74% of downtown on-street public parking spaces are occupied during peak hours. This means that even during the busiest times, more than 100 parking spaces are available within easy walking distance of downtown, meaning the town can afford to lose some Main Avenue parking to make it a more amenable place for people.

The stat inspired me to go looking for some other parking lot data. It’s alarming.

• 2,720 acres: Area dedicated to parking in La Plata County in 2012. (USGS)

• 121,500: Number of households that could be powered by solar canopies covering all of La Plata County’s parking spaces. (Berkeley Lab)

• 12.2 million: Number of parking spaces in Phoenix in 2017 for about 4 million inhabitants and 2.7 million registered vehicles. (Cities)

• 820 million: Estimated number of parking spaces in the U.S. (VTPI.org)

The Durango parking study is worth reading (tinyurl.com/3tz93h95) and also contains some alarming figures regarding projected growth in population and number of cars for the town.

The Land Desk is a newsletter from Jonathan P. Thompson, longtime journalist. To subscribe, go to: landdesk.org

After attempts to retrofit it as a carbon-capture facility, the coal-fired San Juan Generating Station, west of Farmington, was officially retired at the end of 2022.

Living in harmony

Colorado Parks and Wildlife recently released their draft Colorado Wolf Restoration and Management Plan. Their plan allows for wolves to be killed on protected public lands.

It is futile to bring wolves into the state if they are allowed to be killed. In an August 2022 statewide survey of 1,500 Colorado voters, nearly two-thirds said they believed that Colorado’s gray wolves should not be trophy hunted or trapped after they have returned to Colorado. The survey was weighted to Republicans and Western Colorado voters.

Colorado voters also approved Proposition 114, which calls for using scientific data when implementing the gray wolf restoration plan. It is time to embrace sound science. Scientific studies have shown that killing wolves does nothing to reduce livestock losses.

What is needed is nonlethal wolf stewardship instead of wolf management that allows killing. Nonlethal human-wildlife coexistence is key. Doing this will lead to a successful and sustainable wolf reintroduction for all concerned.

– Michael Wenzl, Pueblo

A sampling of bills

As I head into my final two years as House District 59 representative, I eagerly anticipate the work ahead.

Colorado law permits every legislator to present five

bills in a committee each year. Unlike some states, Colorado wants to hear from each of its 100 elected legislators and the people they represent. Post-election, I have been working regularly with constituents, fellow members and stakeholders to craft bills helping fellow Coloradans.

Although nothing is certain yet, here is some legislation I am considering:

• Student math scores have dropped in Colorado, so I am proposing to create a train-the-trainer model to help math teachers assist other math teachers and parents to help our students. We must understand what both urban and rural schools require, and which math programs best meet every need. The Governor’s office is interested in helping with this bill.

• Lead has been proven to be toxic in any amount to humans and animals, so I have been working with the Sportsmen Caucus, Colorado Parks and Wildlife and health departments to create a bullet exchange program, where hunting rounds using lead bullets can be exchanged for rounds with non-lead bullets. It is voluntary, but will prevent lead from contaminating game animals, water and soil.

• Water is the lifeblood of Western Colorado, so another bill will study how to use our mountains to store the snowpack, extending its use into the dryer parts of the year. This bill came out of my work with the bipartisan Water Resources Review interim committee.

• Another bill in the interim committee would

design a water literacy curriculum for K-12 students to teach them about the value of water and how to save and store it. The courses are voluntary, and we hope the next generation learns about how vital water is in Colorado.

• Though La Plata County closed the Bayfield landfill years ago, following all the laws at that time, regulations have changed, and now the county may be out of compliance, an issue found throughout Colorado. Together, we are working on legislation to remediate contaminated landfills while not charging counties excessive fines.

• In many areas, police will not arrest anyone disobeying a “stop arm” on a school bus unless they witness the act. This bill will add cameras to the arms, aiming to save children’s lives while stretching a police department’s limited resources.

• In rural Colorado, school administrators can be in short supply, and those who have retired with PERA benefits cannot return to the job while also being paid for all their hours of work. Last year, we gave rural teachers and other support staff permission to return to work to address the employee shortage and also receive full PERA benefits. We are investigating adding administrators to that permissive list as well.

• In statute, Colorado college professors can take sabbaticals and still receive at least partial pay from the schools. This bill will allow the same privilege for the staff who head specific student-related divisions, like

environmental, counseling, diversity and food-security programs. The schools decide if the sabbatical offer will be expanded.

Legislators have also formed discussion groups concerning special issues, such as affordable housing, school finance, health care, gun safety and drug-abuse prevention, where we will generate more legislation.

We have many issues to address this year. Together, we will find the resources to do what needs to be done.

– Rep. Barbara McLachlan, D-Durango

Remembering Franco

I graduated from high School in Willingboro, N.J., in 1967. We were known as the John F. Kennedy Gryphons. In the fall of 1966, our football team was competing for the South Jersey Championship against our arch rivals, the Rancocas Valley Red Devils. Both our teams were at a decisive 9-0. It would come down to a league championship game to be played on the Red Devils home field in Mount Holly. Mount Holly was the County Seat for Burlington County. I remember that crisp fall afternoon very well. I had never seen that many people attending a high school football game. The estimated crowd attendance was close to 2,000 people.

Rancocas Valley showcased its premier full back, Franco Harris. We relied on our own 220-pound fullback, Jeff Williams. Both young men were regarded as the two top players of the league. When the game started, we held our own for much of the

first half, but by the second half it was a different story, that was when Franco took over. Our coach, Bill Luttrel, decided to have Jeff play both ways and inserted him as a nose tackle. It was hopeless, Franco ran everyone down. Ultimately, we lost 42-14.

It was custom in those days to invite the opposing team to a Saturday night dance. What I recalled about Franco was that he was friendly, humble and gracious. He didn’t call attention to himself. Both teams enjoyed a night of revelry.

My father and Franco’s dad were friends, as they both were non-commissioned officers stationed at Fort Dix. Franco’s dad, as I recall, was a mess sargeant, and my dad worked in the Central Intelligence Department. After high school, I attended Rutgers University, and Franco was recruited by Penn State University. I remember during my college years visiting my dad at the local VFW and watching Franco play for Penn State. Destiny would call, and Franco went on to become one of the most legendary players to put on a Steeler uniform. He is best known for his miraculous feat, best known in the annals of professional football as the “Immaculate Reception,” which enabled the Steelers to defeat the Oakland Raiders in the AFC Divisional Championship on the last play of the game Dec. 23, 1972. Franco received many accolades for his performance on the field and was admitted to the Pro Football Hall of Fame in 1990. He passed away on Dec. 20, 2022, almost the 50th anniversary of his miraculous play. May he rest in peace. This old rival will miss him greatly.

– Burt Baldwin, Ignacio

New laws of the land

Disposable bag fees, higher wages and cage-free eggs include changes for 2023

by Colorado Public Radio Staff

The start of the new year brings into effect numerous laws and regulations. While some are relatively obscure, others will be felt by many.

Minimum wage increase

On Jan. 1, the statewide hourly minimum wage will increase by $1.09, to $13.65 for regular employees and $10.63 for tipped employees. In Denver, the only city to set its own minimum wage, the regular rate will increase to $17.29 an hour.

Colorado’s minimum wage changes at the start of each year based on the past year’s inflation rate. The statewide increase is equal to nearly 9 percent. It’s a small silver lining amid inflation, though it also adds a new cost for employers to absorb or pass along.

Plastic bag fee

Starting Jan. 1,  stores across the state will be required to charge 10 cents for every paper or plastic bag they provide to a customer. Local governments can set the fee even higher. The money collected will be split 40-60 between stores and local governments, which can spend the money on recycling and related programs.

The universal fee is the next step toward a statewide ban on single-use plastic bags that will take effect in 2024. The same law also bans single-use foam food containers starting next year.

People who show proof of being enrolled in a state or federal food assistance program are exempt from paying the fee.

Paid family leave deductions

Colorado workers will see their paychecks shrink slightly in the new year, as

the state starts collecting fees that will fund a paid leave program. The program is open to workers taking time off to care for themselves, a new child, or a loved one, among other reasons.

Up to $4.50 for every $1,000 of wages will be withheld from worker’s paychecks.

Late vehicle registration fines

Coloradans who fail to register a vehicle within 90 days of moving from out of state will have to pay additional penalties. The new law closes a loophole that exempted vehicle owners with a temporary registration from another state from paying late fees when registering vehicles here.

According to an analysis in 2021, around 500,000 vehicles were registered with an expired temporary registration.

Under the new law vehicle owners who register late will need to pay back taxes and fees. The change is estimated to bring in nearly $7.6 million this next fiscal year, and $15.4 in fiscal year 2023-24.

Increase of alcohol-monitoring Colorado will require more people to wear alcohol-monitoring devices if they’re convicted of driving under the influence. Under  SB22-055, any person who’s put on probation for felony drunk or drugged driving will be required to wear a device that can detect if they’re consuming alcohol. They’ll have to wear the “continuous alcohol monitoring” devices for at least 90 days.

The change applies to the most significant DUI charges, when a drunk driver seriously injures or kills someone, or if a person has multiple convictions.

It’s the nation’s first law mandating the use of the technology, according to  man-

ufacturer Scram Systems, although Colorado judges can already choose to require them in some cases. If the device detects a person is drinking, their probation can be revoked and they could be jailed.

The rule isn’t ironclad: People can be exempted from the monitoring if they live in an area where they can’t “reasonably obtain” the device, or if it would not be “in the best interests of justice.” People forced to use the devices are charged $8 to $10 per day to cover the cost, unless they’re unable to afford it.

State analysts expect that nearly 900 people per year will be required to wear the monitoring devices under the new law.

Free the chickens

Colorado’s largest egg providers are on the path to keeping all of their hens outside of cages. The first step, which goes into effect Jan. 1, requires that each hen have at least a square foot of floor space in its enclosure. By the start of 2025, cages will be banned altogether, and hens will have to be kept in open barns, although the law does not require that they have access to the outdoors.

Proponents say the traditional system of keeping hens confined to small cages is inhumane, preventing the birds from performing natural behaviors like perching and dust bathing. However, the transition could significantly increase the cost of eggs. For example, the cheapest cage-free eggs at Walmart are more than double the cost of the cheapest conventional eggs.

More treatment for fentanyl users

State lawmakers passed a law in 2022 to address criminal penalties and treatment for fentanyl, the deadly synthetic opiate.

Some elements of the bill already took effect – most notably, a new felony penalty for possession of more than a gram of the drug, which began July 1, 2022.

Starting Jan. 1, people convicted of certain drug offenses will have to undergo a substance-use assessment, and they could then be ordered into treatment, including staying at a residential facility.

County jails that receive certain state funding will have to implement policies by Jan. 1 to connect people with medication-assisted treatment and other services after they leave jail, rather than just while they’re behind bars. The state also will create a real-time map of overdoses and fentanyl poisonings.

Meanwhile, organizations that oversee behavioral health system will have to establish contracts to offer short-term residential care for withdrawal, medicationassisted treatment and more.

Funding search and rescue

A surcharge increase on snowmobile and off-road vehicle licenses will help pay for more funds for backcountry search and rescue equipment and training. Colorado Parks and Wildlife will oversee the program, which was previously located within the Division of Local Affairs.

The division still needs to conduct a rulemaking process to set the new fees. Backcountry search and rescue cards also go to fund search and rescue operations.

The new law also would give dependents of people who die in search and rescue operations free in-state college tuition.

For more from Colorado Public Radio, go to www.cpr.org. ■

Party on wheels

Thirsty Rooster cocktail trailer quenches in retro style

by Kathleen O’Connor

Thirsty Rooster, Durango’s hip mobile bartending service trailer bar, wants to make your next celebration or backyard shindig one you won’t soon forget. But first, let’s get one thing straight: They’re not Toast. They get that a lot. (For those who don’t know, Toast is the former mobile bar and traveling lounge that evolved into what is now the popular Union Social House on North Main.)

Thirsty Rooster co-owners and good friends Charlotte Ford and Marc O’Connor were inspired to start their own business when they moved to Durango from Bend, Ore., back in 2017. With a combined 20+ years of experience in the food and beverage industry, they knew their business would most likely revolve around this sector. However, they were not exactly sure what their business would (literally) look like. That is until one day, while driving through Bayfield, they spotted a fire-engine red 1972 vintage horse trailer for sale on the side of the road. The two friends excitedly bought the trailer the very next day.

“We saw this little red horse trailer and immediately knew we wanted it even though we weren’t sure what it was going to become,” O’Connor explained.

Initially, Ford and O’Connor tossed around the idea of starting a food truck with their newly acquired trailer, but given its small size, they eventually decided a mobile beverage bar with creatively crafted cocktails would be the perfect fit for them. So, in the winter of 2017, O’Connor customized the trailer’s interior to transform it into a workable space that would accommodate the needs of their new mobile beverage service.

Thirsty Rooster officially launched the following year in early 2018 in its flagship vintage red trailer. The business now touts an additional retro draft beer trailer – also rebuilt and customized by the industrious O’Connor –as well as two mobile wooden bars or “roosts,” as they are called. This collectively allows Thirsty Rooster to serve up libations to as many as 300 people at both public and private events, such as weddings, birthdays, anniversary gatherings or holiday parties.

Though crowds of humans simultaneously descending upon you for a drink can be daunting, Ford and O’Connor pride themselves on maintaining a steadfast standard during these high-pressure cocktail-slinging moments: No bar lines. “We hear these nightmare stories from people who attended other weddings with only one bartender for 150 guests, and the waiting line was so long,” said O’Connor. “For us, that would be a failure, and we refuse to let that happen at our events.”

Ford concurs. “There’s a lot going on, for example, at a wedding, and the last thing we want is for someone to have to wait so long for a drink that they miss a special moment, like the cake cutting or the bride and groom arriving,” she said. “Our philosophy is to get the drinks

out as fast as possible without sacrificing the quality.”

And the creative, handcrafted drinks Ford and O’Connor concoct are what really give Thirsty Rooster its unique service flair. In the case of weddings, the partners like to meet with the couple to get a feel for them and the type of drinks they enjoy. They then create a specialty drink unique to the occasion. “After getting to know the couple, we create a menu curated around what we think they would like,” Ford said. “If they’re local, we will set up a private cocktail tasting where they can try the cocktails we’ve created, see the colors of the drinks and their garnishes, and go over any other details. It’s part of our service.”

One popular creation, named the Southwest Lady by Ford, comprises tequila, aperol and fresh, organic grapefruit juice with a touch of jalapeño syrup and lime juice and completed with a chili-sugared rim. “It’s like a spicy Paloma with a twist,” Ford said.

And then there’s the Thyme for a Rye, made with rye whiskey, blackberries, organic lemon juice and thymeinfused simple syrup.

Depending on customer preferences, Thirsty Rooster also offers non-alcoholic packages, including lemonade, coffee, tea and water stations. “Most of our specialty cocktails can also be mocktails, so we can make them

without the alcohol,’’ Ford explained.

As Thirsty Rooster moves toward becoming a more full-service event coordination company, Ford and O’Connor have recently expanded their offerings to include more personalized options. They’ve introduced several new features, including yard games and a mobile photo booth. In addition, customers may rent the photo booth as a stand-alone service.

For Ford and O’Connor, building connections with people during these special occasions is not only what they consider part of their job; it’s one of the most enjoyable aspects of it. Ford describes how she and O’Connor love meeting the bride and groom beforehand in the case of weddings. “For me,” Ford said, “it makes for a more exciting, more personalized experience. Then, when they come to the bar, it’s like meeting up again with an old friend.”

“It feels good when the bride’s mother comes up, gives us a hug, and thanks us,” O’Connor added.

Ford and O’Connor are currently booking for their summer season, though – full disclosure – they’re already halfway booked through 2023.

For more information on the Thirsty Rooster, check them out at www.thirstyrooster.com. ■

Charlotte Ford and Marc O’Connor, purveyors of the Thirsty Rooster

Albums of the year (part two)

by Jon E. Lynch

By November and December each calendar year, hordes of bloated, self-aggrandizing critics and columnists are compiling, tallying and whitling down their “Best Of” lists for public consumption. Right around this time last month – in an attempt to bolster our local economy, encourage supporting artists of any sort and help prop up the early holiday shopping types – I began to compile a nowhere-close-to-comprehensive list of my favorite albums released in 2022.

What’s to follow is a continuation/ sexpansion of that list. A 100% subjective take on the things I listened to and enjoyed, rather than what garnered the highest starred or numbered review, widest acclaim or the strongest aggregate Metacritic score. I’ll even make a half attempt to make it easier to digest. Here goes.

Americana-ish

• Hermanos Gutiérrez, “El Bueno Y El Malo” – Two brothers, half Ecuadorian half Swiss, with acoustic and steel guitar, melding the Latin American influences of their grandfather and the textures of Ennio Morricone’s classic Spaghetti Western scores. All instrumental and produced by The Black Keys’ Dan Auerbach.

• The Sadies, “Colder Streams” – 11th full-length from Toronto’s purveyors of surf/country/noir-twang and the last before devastating and untimely passing of co-founder Dallas Good. This band has never made a bad record.

• Molly Lewis, “Mirage EP” - Six dense songs of layered instrumental folk-leaning soundscapes with Molly’s trademark whistling creating a throughline.

• Friendship, “Love the Stranger” –Pedal steel, sparse guitars, bass, drums, vocal harmonies in a hazy sometimes

twangy-leaning indie rock album on the stellar Merge record label. Ended up on repeat.

• Various Artists, “Something Borrowed, Something New: A Tribute to John Anderson” – Star-studded tribute to a country music legend. Songs interpreted and recorded by Gillian Welch, David Rawlings, Del McCoury, John Prine, Sierra Ferrell, Sturgill Simpson and more.

Rock and Roll, etc.

• Ghost Woman, “Ghost Woman” –No clue how I came across this record but so thankful I did. Multi-instrumentalist Evan Uschenko recorded this album in Arizona and melds psychedelic garage-folk with a variety of other styles into a haunting, cohesive indie/rock record.

• Lathe, “Tongue of Silver” – Tyler Davis created a record of heavy instrumental sludge that he’s described as

both Doom Country and Heavy Twang.

• The Black Angels, “Wilderness of Mirrors” – The Austin, Texas-based psych-rock band released a 15-track, 58minute double LP of some of their best work to date, culled from the sonics of forbearers Black Sabbath, 13th Floor Elevators and the Velvet Underground.

• OFF! “Free LSD” – While I may cringe at the moniker, punk rock supergroup is appropriate. Members of Black Flag/Circle Jerks, Burning Brides, …Trail of Dead and Thundercat released this “heavy punk industrial free jazz soundtrack recording.”

• Gilla Band, “Most Normal” – Irish quartet’s first record under the new name (formerly Girl Band) of perfectly spasmodic and sometimes caustic postpunk, noise & art-rock.

• Launder, “Happening” – John Cudlip is California born and raised. His debut under the name Launder came

out of sessions with friends Zachary Cole Smith (DIIV) and Jackson Phillips (Day Wave) and worships at the altar of bands such as My Bloody Valentine, The Jesus & Mary Chain and Slowdive.

The Hip Hop I Didn’t Mention

• Roc Marciano and The Alchemist, “The Elephant Man’s Bones” – Collision of coasts with New York’s Marciano and L.A.’s Alchemist creating an album too great in scope to distill here, but easily placed on this list.

• Infinity Knives & Brian Ennals, “King Cobra” – Direct from their U.K.based label Phantom Limb: “Baltimore hip-hop experimentalists Infinity Knives & Brian Ennals return with vital new album King Cobra, a mighty, omnivorous record that pushes the duo to unstoppable creative heights.”

• Westside Gunn, “10 aka Hitler Wears Hermes X” – I’m genuinely surprised that this, Gunn’s 14th mixtape and apparently ninth installment of the Hitler Wears Hermes series, grew on me the way it did.

Don’t forget the aforementioned Bonnie Trash, This Lonesome Paradise and Danger Mouse & Black Thought records. More than mentions deserved go to Goon, Tami Neilson, Chat Pile, Oneida, End It, Soul Glo, Satan’s Pilgrims, Built to Spill, Khruangbin and Vieux Farka Touré, Alex G, The Medicine Singers, Nikki Lane, Smirk, L’Exotighost, and Abraxas.

The best in locally made music that SHOULD have been covered above came from Nathan Schmidt, the Crags and Dreem Machine. Support them and all of the above through Bandcamp or at your local record store. I’m still curious what you listened to this year, whether new or old, that I should be made aware of. Send my recommendations along with questions, comments or gripes. Especially the gripes. KDUR_PD@fort lewis.edu ■

Punk rock supergroup OFF! made this year’s list with their album “Free LSD”

(From left): Justin Brown, Autry Fulbright II, Dimitri Coats and Keith Morris.

/ Photo credit Jeff Forney

Disappearing act

‘Sugar Street’ a poignant tale of trying to outwit surveillance state

by Jeffrey Mannix

Let’s start out the new year with a peculiar little book that’s fascinating in its atypical way and maybe even unusual enough to fit in with our conspicuously peculiar sociopolitical climate.

Jonathan Dee was contending for a Pulitzer Prize in 2011 for his novel “The Privileges” and has received fellowships from the National Endowment for the Arts and the Guggenheim Founda tion. He’s a former contributing writer for the New York Times Maga zine, a senior editor of the Paris Re view, and a National Magazine Award-nominated literary critic for Harper’s and the New Yorker. He certainly has the bona fides to be taken seriously, and with his latest hardback novel from Grove Atlan tic spanning a courteous 206 pages, we have to give Dee respect for writing an unconventional story well. And in my opinion, he’s written an interesting and even poignant narrative reflect ing the extraordinary times we find ourselves living in.

“Sugar Street” is the name of Dee’s seventh published book, about an unnamed, mostly ordinary man who decides to em bezzle $168,048 from his partner in a failing travel agency then disappear forever.

Written in the first person, “Sugar Street” is an avenue where our protagonist rents a room after meticulously avoiding a minefield of surveil lance for five days to arrive at nowhere he’s ever been or heard of and after a quick but thorough reconnoitering. “Your first instinct might be that the best place to disappear would be the country, the woods. But no, it had to be a city I figured: navigable by foot or mass transit, big enough to be anonymous in. Nothing too cosmopolitan, though, not someplace anyone of my acquaintance would go for a vacation or for some conference or convention. I’ve never so much as passed through; I know no one here; I know no one who’s ever even been here. Nothing to connect me to it: not the tiniest filament of logic or intuition to lead anyone who knew me to suspect that this is where I might have gone to ground.”

Disappearing is more than difficult anymore, nearing impossible when you get right down to trying. “Sugar Street” is more of a memoir of a fictional character attempting to outsmart the systems that are smarter than anyone

trying to be perfectly smart.

The book opens with:

“The American Interstate highway system. Wonder of the twentieth-century world. Smooth, wide, fast, inexhaustible; blank, amnesiac, full of libertarian possibility; burned into the continent like the nuclear shadow of the frontier spirit, even if you happen to be traveling east instead of west, not much difference anymore. Route 66, Jack Kerouac, all that shit. But at some point, I snapped out of it and remembered the truly salient, non-mythological fact about the interstate of today, which is that law-enforcement cameras are everywhere. You can’t travel 10 miles in any direction without your movements being logged, your license plate photographed, your face. Certainly once you’re on the highway, there is no way to get off it again without all those things happening, without your whereabouts becoming data, instantly. Right. No more highways, then. I pulled my hat down over my eyes and got off at the next exit, drove around until I found a nonchain gas station, bought a Three Musketeers and an old, folding paper map of the state. They still make them. I remembered my E-ZPass, another data bomb, and threw that into a construction dumpster.”

Our man sleeps in his car along the route to somewhere that turns out to be Sugar Street, occasionally querying a worn out clerk late at night in a run-down motel lacking surveillance cameras if he’d take cash for a room, finding stand-alone greasy spoons behind burned-out street lights to eat, keeping to the bypassed routes east, obeying every law, looking a facsimile of normal.

When he finally reaches Sugar Street and a “For Rent” sign in a broken, first-floor window, he inquires to a once-comely now booze-ravaged landlady about the rental. With a separate entrance up to the second floor and windows facing the street, a deal is struck, cash is paid in advance for six months so a background check is irrelevant, and a single, pleasant and obviously unattached man is about to blend into anonymity that he knows is against the laws of nature.

Oh, did I say that his money is stolen; did I say that a murder is in the wind? There’s plenty more story here than I have even hinted at. We get to like this man because of his proactive disaffection for the surveillance state, for the goodness he displays on Sugar Street, and as much as we would like tranquility, poetic justice is ofttimes prepossessing.

A peculiar, allegorical book written by a talented, wary penman who’s warming up for another chart topper. “Sugar Street” is just right for January 2023. And Maria’s Bookshop will give you a 15% discount on Murder Ink books, just ask. ■

Stuff to Do

Thursday05

Grief Support Group, 10 a.m., La Plata County Senior Center, 2424 Main Ave.

Miller Middle School Groundbreaking, 12 – 1 p.m., Miller Middle School auditorium this Thursday, Jan. 5.

Live music, 5:30 p.m., The Office & Diamond Belle, 699 Main Ave.

Trivia Night, 6:30 p.m., Powerhouse Science Center, 1333 Camino del Rio.

First Thursdays Songwriter Series, featuring Chuck Hank, Wellington, Alex Graf, Anne Chase, Madeline Bauman, 7-9 p.m., iNDIGO Room, 1315 Main Ave.

Friday06

Salsa Dance Night, 6:30 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Silent Disco, 9 p.m.-11:30 p.m., 11th Street Station.

Sunday08

Purgatory Demo Days, 9 a.m. – 3 p.m. Demo the latest gear from local shops.

Open Mic, 2 p.m., Mancos Brewing.

Live music, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle & The Office, 699 Main Ave.

Feed the People! free mutual aid meal & winter gear drive for homeless community members, every Sunday, 2-4 p.m., Buckley Park.

Sunday Funday, featuring games and prizes, 6 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

“Unique Artifacts of the Gallina Culture

presentation, 7 p.m., FLC’s Lyceum Room. Hosted by San Juan Archaeological Society.

Geeks Who Drink Trivia, 8 p.m., The Roost, 128 E. College Dr.

Karaoke Roulette, 8 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Ongoing

“Life in Small Moments” art exhibit, Dec. 1-March 1, FLC’s Center for Innovation, Durango Main Mall, 835 Main Ave.

Pastische Art Exhibit, thru Jan. 7, featuring seven local women artists, Smiley Café, 1309 E. 3rd Ave.

is Monday at noon. To submit an item, email: calendar@durangotelegraph.com

First Friday Art Show, 5 p.m., Create Art & Tea, 1015 Main Ave.

Horizons play, 5 p.m., Mancos Brewing.

Live music, 5:30 p.m., The Office, 699 Main Ave.

Jack Ellis & Larry Carver play, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave.

Full Moon Snowshoe Hike, 6-9 p.m., Durango Nordic Center.

Deadline for “Stuff to Do” submissions

Starlight Jam Session, 6 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Ecstatic Dance, every Friday, 6:30-8:30 p.m., American Legion, 878 E. 2nd Ave.

Saturday07

Little Brother plays, 5 p.m., Mancos Brewing.

Live music, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle & The Office, 699 Main Ave.

Community Yoga, 6-7 p.m., Yoga Durango, 1485 Florida Rd. Donations accepted.

Monday09

Live music, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle & The Office, 699 Main Ave.

Happy Hour Yoga, 5:30 p.m., Ska Brewing, 225 Girard St.

Comedy Showcase, weekly, 7:30 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Tuesday10

Live music, 5 p.m., The Office, 699 Main Ave.

Jason Thies play, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle Saloon, 699 Main Ave.

Open Mic Night, 7:30-9:30 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.

Wednesday11

Live music, 5 p.m., Diamond Belle & The Office, 699 Main Ave.

Paint & Sip Night, 5:30 p.m., Starlight

“Wild Kratts: Ocean Adventure! And Creature Power!” hands on STEM exhibits for children ages 3 to 9, runs until Jan. 7, Farmington Museum, 3041 E. Main St.

The Hive Indoor Skate Park, open skate and skate lessons. For schedule and online waiver, go to www.thehivedgo.org

Upcoming

Free Legal Clinic, Jan. 13, 4-5 p.m., Ignacio Community Library, 470 Goddard Ave.

New Belgium Party & Giveaway, Jan. 13, 2-3 p.m., The Powderhouse & Pitchfork Pub at Purgatory.

Michal Menert and Late Night Radio w/Josh Tee plays, Jan. 13, 7 p.m., Animas City Theatre.

“From this Earth: The Timeless Beauty of Pueblo Pottery,” free zoom talk, Sat., Jan. 14, 1 p.m. Register at animasmuseum.org/ events.html.

A Mac & the Height w/special guest plays, Jan. 14, 7 p.m., Animas City Theatre.

Open Thurs. - Mon., 11am - close Closed Tues. & Wed!

Barking at ghosts, mommy issues and playing with dolls

Interesting fact: That string of random &#^$*@ characters we use for swearing in print is called a “grawlix” and should be spoken as “bleep.” Or “bleeping,” as context requires.

Dear Rachel,

My dogs constantly bark at things that I’m convinced aren’t there. They ignore the UPS truck, the postal workers and fireworks, all the stereotypical rile-up things. But then they bark when it’s snowing, there’s no sound anywhere, no hint of excitement or danger. They don’t seem to listen when I explain there’s nothing to bark at. But I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t even grumble if a cat burglar slipped through the roof. What is it that gets them going at nothing?

Dear Wrong Tree,

– Barking Mad

There are plenty of things you cannot see that are nevertheless, in theory, there. Like democracy. Or ghosts. Or the ghost of democracy, calling out in Dickensian pain to warn us off our current path before it is too late, too late, tooooo laaaaaate… but because we are human, we will ignore it and later claim we did “the best we could.” Maybe that’s what your dogs are barking at?

– Worth asking, Rachel

support this, because her mom is cool. But I also don’t support it, because now my mom is dropping big old clumsy hints about moving in with me. That straight up ain’t happening. But I’m also doomed to a lifetime of comments and guilt that will rough me up regardless. Do I have any way out here, reasonable or otherwise?

– Mother&$#%ed

Dear Mama Punctuated,

I saw enough Garfield cartoons to say, with some authority, that you should mail your mother to Abu Dhabi to get rid of her. But she will come back. Mothers will always come back. There is no escaping mothers. And there’s no escaping this question: do punctuation marks stand for specific letters in curse words? Or are they just randomly chosen? I think we should just start saying “you ampersand pound percentage!” for emphasis.

– Dollar asterisk you too, Rachel

Email Rachel: telegraph@durangotelegraph.com

Dear Rachel,

Dear Rachel,

My long-time girlfriend has her mom about to move in with her. She’s not ill, just getting old, and my gal wants to keep an eye on her. I

Purgatory Classic Ski Team Races, Jan. 1922, USSA Super G and Giant Slalom race event.

Kim Richey plays, Jan. 19, 7:30 p.m., Smiley Café, 1309 E. 3rd Ave.

Nicki Parrott plays, Jan. 20-21, shows at 5 & 8 p.m., The Lift at Cascade, 50827 Highway 550. Durangocooljazz.com

Magic Beans & Tone Dogs play, Jan. 20, 7 p.m., Animas City Theatre.

Know the Snow SkiMo Race, fourth annual rando race, Jan. 22, 8 – 9:30 a.m. Benefit and fundraiser for Know the Snow Fund, a local

I received two life-sized stuffed dolls for Christmas, characters from a popular animated film. (Names avoided to preserve some shred of anonymity.) I do not want two lifesized stuffed dolls. I do not even have any particular excitement about this movie. I don’t know why anyone would think I want the equivalent of two fifth-graders taking up space without paying me rent. Walmart also won’t take returns without a receipt. What can I do with these dolls, and how can I get

nonprofit dedicated to increasing accessibility to avalanche awareness.

McDonald’s Twilight Night Race, Jan. 25, 5-8 p.m., Purgatory. Individuals or teams can choose one discipline from three separate races. Skate skiers, fat bikers and snowshoers.

A Shakespearean Snowdown, Jan. 27 – Feb. 5, Durango. www.snowdown.org.

Venture Snowboard Demo Day, Jan. 28, 9 a.m. – 4 p.m., beach at Purgatory.

Colorado Native Beer Party & Giveaway, Jan. 28, 3-4 p.m., Purgy’s Patio at Purgatory.

across to the gift-giver that anything unasked-for and bigger than a breadbox is uncool?

– Overstuffed

Dear Recipient, I see a mutually beneficial partnership opportunity with the barking dogs person. You have two humansized chew toys. Their dogs need to learn to bark at tangible invaders instead of imaginary friends. Bonus opportunity: take video of the dog-training at its most, erm, enthusiastic, and send that as a thank-you to your gift giver, whose budget is clearly better developed than their sense of scale.

– Get ’em, Rachel

Modelo Party & Giveaway, Jan. 31, 3-4 p.m., Purgy’s Patio at Purgatory.

Snowdown Kick-off Party & 2024 Theme Announcement, Jan. 29, 1-2 p.m., Purgy's Patio.

Great Decisions: Energy Geopolitics, presentation by Guinn Unger, Jan. 31, 11:45 a.m., Durango Public Library.

Leo Lloyd Avalanche Workshop, classroom session Feb. 2 from 6-8 p.m., field session Feb. 4 8:30 a.m.-4 p.m. Info at www.thesanjuans.org.

Purgatory Demo Days, Feb. 4, 9 a.m. – 3 p.m. Demo the latest gear from local shops.

FreeWillAstrology

by Rob Brezsny

ARIES (March 21-April 19): “My life was the best omelet you could make with a chainsaw,” observed flamboyant author Thomas McGuane. That’s a witty way to encapsulate his tumultuous destiny. There have been a few moments in 2022 when you might have been tempted to invoke a similar metaphor about your own evolving story. But the good news is that your most recent chainsaw-made omelet is finished and ready to eat. I think you’ll find its taste is savory. And I believe it will nourish you for a long time. (Soon it will be time to start your next omelet, maybe without using the chainsaw this time!)

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): After meticulous research of 2023’s astrological omens, I have come to a radical conclusion: You should tell the people who care for you that you’d like to be called by new pet names. I think you need to intensify their ability and willingness to view you as a sublime creature worthy of adoration. I don’t necessarily recommend you use old standbys like “cutie,” “honey,” “darling” or “angel.” I’m more in favor of unique and charismatic versions, something like “Jubilee” or “Zestie” or “Fantasmo” or “Yowie-Wowie.” Have fun coming up with pet names that you are very fond of. The more, the better.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Fun and useful projects for you to master in 2023 include the following: 1. Be in constant competition with yourself to outdo past accomplishments. But at the same time, be extra compassionate toward yourself. 2. Borrow and steal other people’s good ideas and use them with even better results. 3. Acquire an emerald or two. 4. Increase your awareness of and appreciation for birds. 5. Don’t be attracted to folks who aren’t good for you just because they are unusual or interesting. 6. Upgrade your flirting so it’s even more nuanced but make sure it never violates anyone’s boundaries.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): When she was young, Carolyn Forché was a conventional poet focused on family and childhood. But she transformed. Relocating to El Salvador during its civil war, she began to write about political trauma. Next, she lived in Lebanon during its civil war. She witnessed firsthand the tribulations of military violence and the imprisonment of activists. Her creative work increasingly illuminated questions of social justice. At age 72, she is now a renowned human rights advocate. In bringing her to your attention, I

don’t mean to suggest that you engage in an equally dramatic self-reinvention. But in 2023, I do recommend drawing on her as an inspirational role model. You will have great potential to discover deeper aspects of your life’s purpose – and enhance your understanding of how to offer your best gifts.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Are the characters in Carlos Castañeda’s books on shamanism fictional or real? It doesn’t matter to me. I love the wisdom of his alleged teacher, Don Juan Matus. He said, “Look at every path closely and deliberately. Try it as many times as you think necessary. Then ask yourself, and yourself alone, one question. Does this path have a heart? If it does, the path is good; if it doesn’t, it is of no use.” Don Juan’s advice is perfect for you in the coming nine months, Leo. Tape a copy of his words on your bathroom mirror and read them at least once a week.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Teacher and author Byron Katie claims, “The voice within is what I’m married to. My lover is the place inside me where an honest yes and no come from.” I happen to know that she has also been married for many years to a writer named Stephen Mitchell. So she has no problem being wed to both Mitchell and her inner voice. In accordance with astrological omens, I invite you to propose marriage to your own inner voice. The coming year will be a fabulous time to deepen your relationship with this crucial source of useful and sacred revelation

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Libran Friedrich Nietzsche offered advice that is perfect for you in 2023. It’s strenuous, demanding and daunting. But I have faith. That’s why I provide you with Nietzsche’s rant: “No one can build you the bridge on which you, and only you, must cross the river of life. There may be countless trails and bridges and demigods who would gladly carry you across; but only at the price of pawning and forgoing yourself. There is one path in the world that none can walk but you.”

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): How might you transform the effects of the limitations you’ve been dealing with? What could you do to make it work in your favor as 2023 unfolds? I encourage you to think about these questions with daring and audacity. The more moxie you summon, the greater your luck will be in making the magic happen. Here’s another riddle to wrestle with: What surrender or sacrifice could you initiate that might lead in unforeseen ways to a plucky

breakthrough? I have a sense that’s what will transpire as you weave your way through the coming months in quest of surprising opportunities.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Sagittarian Tina Turner confided, “My greatest beauty secret is being happy with myself.” Experiment with that formula in 2023. I believe the coming months will potentially be a time when you will be happier with yourself than you have ever been before – more at peace with your unique destiny, more accepting of your unripe qualities, more in love with your depths, and more committed to treating yourself with utmost care and respect. Therefore, if Tina Turner is accurate, 2023 will also be a year when your beauty will be ascendant.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): “I’m homesick all the time,” author Sarah Addison Allen writes. “I just don’t know where home is. There’s this promise of happiness out there. I know it. I even feel it sometimes. But it’s like chasing the moon. Just when I think I have it, it disappears into the horizon.” If you have ever felt pangs like hers, I predict they will fade in 2023. I expect you will clearly identify the feeling of home you want –and thereby make it possible to find and create the place, the land and the community where you will experience resounding peace and stability.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Storyteller Michael Meade tells us, “The ship is always off course. Anybody who sails knows that. Sailing is being off-course and correcting. That gives a sense of what life is about.” I interpret Meade’s words to mean that we are never in a perfect groove heading toward our goal. We are constantly deviating from the path we might wish we could follow. And as long as we obsess on the idea that we’re not where we should be, we are distracted from doing our real work. And the real work? The ceaseless corrections. I hope you will regard what I’m saying here as one of your core meditations in 2023, Aquarius.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): A Chinese proverb tells us, “Great souls have wills. Feeble souls have wishes.” I guess that’s true in an abstract way. But in practical terms, most of us are a mix of both great and feeble. We have a modicum of willpower and a bundle of wishes. In 2023, though, you Pisceans could make dramatic moves to strengthen your willpower as you shed wimpy wishes. In my psychic vision of your destiny, I see you feeding metaphorical iron supplements to your resolve and determination.

Deadline for Telegraph classified ads is Tuesday at noon. Ads are a bargain at 10 cents a character with a $5 minimum. Even better, ads can now be placed online: durangotelegraph.com. Prepayment is required via cash, credit card or check.

(Sorry, no refunds or substitutions.) Ads can be submitted via: n www.durangotelegraph.com n classifieds@durango telegraph.com

n 970-259-0133

n 679 E. 2nd Ave., #E2

Approximate office hours:

Mon-Wed: 9ish - 5ish

Thurs: On delivery

Fri: Gone fishing; call first

Announcements

Mind Body Spirit Fair

VFW Durango, Jan 21 & Apr 22. 105. Looking for holistic healers, readers, healing products, chair massage, etc.  CJ Marten weipcj@gmail.com

Lost/Found

Please Return:

To the Grinch who stole my mail from my front porch: Please return the wood bread board handmade by my great-great-grandfather, a family heirloom. May your heart grow 3 sizes today.

Classes/Workshops

Free! Adult Children

Of dysfunctional or alcoholic families (acoa) confidential support group offered by licensed therapists in person or zoom - Durango. Limited space. Date/time—TBD- “If you don’t heal what hurt you, you will bleed on those that didn’t cut you.” Call/text- Nancy Raffaele, MA, LPCC, NCC - (970) 7992202.

Insight Meditation for Beginners

Six-week class on the fundamentals of insight meditation beginning Wednesday, January 11. 5:15-7:00 p.m. For more info and to register, visit durangodharmacenter.org

HelpWanted

Americorps Vista Position

Southwest Conservation Corps seeks a VISTA to assist with creating a new

host-home model in the Four Corners region. Full position details at: https://my.americorps.gov/mp/listing/ viewListing.do?fromSearch=true&id=11 5497.

CommercialforRent

1100-sf Office/Retail Space in Bodo Park

Ground floor with open-front floor plan & back-of-house space + 1/2 bath & kitchenette. Wheelchair access ramp & on-site parking. Short- or long-term lease avail. $1600/mo. 970-799-3732

Wanted

Cash for Vehicles, Copper, Alum, Etc.

at RJ Metal Recycle. Also free appliance and other metal drop off. 970-2593494.

ForSale

Fine Wood Breakfront

153 ½”x89” hand-crafted fine wood breakfront. $2,500. Call Bob at 973454-5551 to receive spec sheets.

Kawai QX100 electronic keyboard

Your dad was wrong – you can still make it as a musician. Kawai QX100 electronic keyboard for $100 OBO. Comes with owner’s manual, no adaptor. Can be used with AC adaptor or six size C dry cell batteries. j.marie.pace@ gmail.com

Gordon Smith FibreFlex Longboard

A classic – sweet, smooth ride for

cushy cruising. Been around the block but still in great shape. 42” long. $50 Text: 970-749-2595.

HaikuMovieReview

‘Glass Onion: A Knives Out Mystery’

Fun fact: the first ‘Knives Out’ was the last film I saw in the theater

– Lainie Maxson

Harmony Cleaning and Organizing

Residential, offices, commercial and vacation rentals, 970-403-6192.

Crusher Fat Bike

2015 Sun Bicycles 7-speed, in excellent cond. Barely ridden. Basket and kick stand. MSRP: $530, asking: $450, firm. 970-903-0005.

Reruns Home Furnishings

Warm up your space with quality pre-owned furniture and décor. Vintage dish/glassware – great for entertaining. Retro cocktail glasses and decanters, Crat & Barrel dishes, etc. … 572 E. 6th Ave. Open Mon.-Sat. 385-7336.

Services

Anxiety, Depression, Trauma, Life Challenges?

You can live the life you want. Help is affordable & confidential/self-paysliding scale fee. Durango. Package specials avail. Call/Text: Nancy Raffaele, MA, LPCC, NCC- (970) 799-2202

Western Skies Counseling

@ 28th & Main, Durango 1. Nancy Raffaele, MA, LPCC, NCC-adults/selfpay/sliding scale fee/call or text (970) 799-2202 and 2. Joseph F. Prekup, MS, LPC - young adults & adults/selfpay/call or text (970) 281-5550

Marketing Small/Local Businesses

Media, website building and content editing, copywriting and editing, newsletters, blogs, etc. for small, local, independent or startup businesses.  www. thesaltymedia.com or email jnderge @gmail.com

Lowest Prices on Storage!

Inside/outside storage near Durango and Bayfield. 10-x-20, $130. Outside spots: $65, with discounts available. RJ Mini Storage. 970-259-3494.

BodyWork

Massage, Facials, Foot Detox

Durango. Competitive rates & package specials / Call /text Nancy, LMT, LE(970) 799-2202

In-Home Fitness Training

Free consultation. Diane Brady NSCA-CPT. 970-903-2421.

Lotus Path Healing Arts

Now accepting new clients. Offering a unique, intuitive fusion of Esalen massage, deep tissue & Acutonics, 24 years of experience. To schedule call Kathryn, 970-201-3373.

Massage by Meg Bush

LMT, 30, 60 & 90 min., 970-7590199.

CommunityService

Volunteer Advocates Needed

Do you want to make a difference in your community and the lives of others? Alternative Horizons is in need of volunteers to staff our hotline. AH supports and empowers survivors of domestic violence. For info. call 970-247-4374 or visit our alternativehorizons.org