Rizzed out
elegraph the durango
FREE Dec. 14, 2023 Vol. XXII, No. 50 durangotelegraph.com
inside
T H E
O R I G I N A L
I N D I E
W E E K L Y
L I N E
O N
D U R A N G O
&
B E Y O N D
Chasing the dream
Grapes of wrath?
Slip, sliding away
Ski bum living faceplants into ski town realities p6
Liquor store wine sales take a hit, but not all bad p8
Biking in snow, slush and ice can be fun (no, really) p10
2 n Dec. 14, 2023
telegraph
lineup
The dreams – and realities – of starting your own Christmas tree forest
6 Writers on the Range
4 La Vida Local
Heavy lifting by Zach Hively
7 Soap Box
6
8 Top Story 10 Gossip of the Cyclers
Bummed out If ski towns want to stay that way, they need to take care of their own
12-13 Stuff to Do
by Heather Hansman / Writers on the Range
13 Ask Rachel
8
14 Free Will Astrology
Yep, grocery stores have put a hurt on local liquor stores, but it’s not all bad by Missy Votel
On the cover The nearby Wilson range in all its winter splendor. We’re not sure whose idea it was to name adjacent 14ers “Mount Wilson” and “Wilson Peak,” but who really cares which is which? They’re equally beautiful./ Photo by Andy High
Snow what? If you’re prepared, riding in the snow, slush & black ice can be fun (no, really) by Jennaye Derge
boilerplate
15 Classifieds 15 Haiku Movie Review
10
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Dread not
We know it may be cold and snowy out there, but it’s never too early to start thinking about festival season. And that festivarian heaven just south of the border, Tico Time, has announced its line-up for next spring’s “Rise & Vibes” reggae festival May 10-12., 2024 Topping the guest list is none other than legendary reggae band Steel Pulse, one of the most critically acclaimed and successful reggae bands of all time. Fronted by lead singer David Hines, Steel Pulse formed in Birmingham, England, in 1975. The band, which oddly enough started off playing London punk clubs, soon became known for its strong social justice and anti-racism message. Their early single "Ku Klux Klan” – which often included a lively stage parody including full KKK regalia – went on to make Rolling Stone’s list of the “Top 500 Greatest Songs of All Time.” David Hines
Buzz kill
T
Ear to the ground: “We drove down here from Colorado.” – Uh, although Durango is south of I-70, it technically is still part of Colorado
thepole
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RegularOccurrences
REAL WORLD ADDRESS: 679 E. 2nd Ave., Ste E2 Durango, CO 81301 PHONE: 970-259-0133 E-MAIL: telegraph@durangotelegraph.com
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Heavily influenced in the early days by Bob Marley (and who wasn’t?) the band went on to become the first non-Jamaican act to win a Grammy for Best Reggae Album for 1985’s “Babylon the Bandit.” The band has also won a slew of other awards, including “Best Reggae Act” by the British MOBO awards, which honor achievements in music of Black origin, and a Lifetime Achievement Award from the Jamaica Music Industry Association. Beyond their message and accolades, though, Steel Pulse is known for its bumping and highly (no-pun intended, well maybe a little) energetic live shows. Aztec may never be the same. Other “Rise & Vibe” headliners include Tribal Seeds, J Boog, Wookie Foot and the Elovators. Even better than reggae in the sun? Proceeds from the festival go to Tico Time’s new Pura Vida for Good nonprofit, which seeks to better the lives of area residents through addiction-recovery support, affordable housing and more. For tickets or more info. go to: www.rise andvibes.com. Dec. 14, 2023 n 3
opinion
LaVidaLocal The trees for the forest When I was a younger man, I had a grand vision for my future: I would buy (or otherwise acquire) some land, and with this land I would grow a Christmas forest, planting a pine tree each year to create homes for woodland creatures until enough of them became my friends that I could dispense with human interaction altogether. I have grown and matured though, and so has the vision. Namely, I am less certain that the forest is a Christmas one. I might more honestly call it a solstice forest. Or a Thanksgiving forest, since that is closer to when I buy the trees. Or a January forest, because that is when I plant them. Or, perhaps most accurately, I could call it a money pit. Regardless of cost, this is one dream coming true. I may not be a world-famous paleontologist ballplayer with a pilot’s license (yet), but by Jiminy Christmas, I have a forest. It is 5 feet tall, four trees large, and counting. Mostly it seems to be counting up. It almost counted down last year, when one of the trees developed an infestation of some kind – not the type of woodland creature I hoped to befriend – that made me abandon, with prejudice, my nochemical kumbaya approach to winter forest management. This tree also had a comorbidity, a second infestation, that I could not identify despite my four years’ experience in forest stewardship. I showed a picture to a man at the nursery. “Looks like bird vomit,” he said. In hindsight, I question if he actually worked there. These are the difficulties that confound my annual tradition. You see, growing a magical EOY forest is less simple than picking up a tree from a lot and strapping it to the roof of any ol’ car. It is predicated on several factors, chief among them that picking up living trees is really, really hard. Living trees require dirt. Dirt is heavy. It is also notoriously difficult to strap to the roof. If we are perfectly frank – and why shouldn’t we be? – half the reason I keep the registration current on my thirtysomething pickup is so that, once a year, I can drive it to my tree dealer, and he can direct two much-younger men to hoist the tree into the bed, and I can drive it home where I unload it by my much older self.
This is relatively easy to do; I have the advantage of gravity. The real trick is sliding this half-ton or so of wood and soil from 3 feet high to ground level without seriously injuring the tree, or myself, or my pride. If we are still perfectly frank – why stop now? – this moment, usually taking place in dwindling daylight and encroaching cold, when I must navigate this living being and its dirt to the earth without the aid of an advanced pulley system, this is the moment I use to assess the state of my physical health. In short, it is my annual exam. When getting the piñon to the ground goes well, I am also doing well. When it is a struggle, or I throw out my back, or I wonder legitimately at any point if I will be spending the night pinned under a root ball, this motivates my exercise regimen for the next 12 months. I say this in earnest: other people train for beach bods or lower cholesterol. I look at a pullup bar in May and think, “Better try to jump and touch that – I got a tree to unload this winter.” This is ludicrous. I know it. The tree knows it. The woodland creatures know it. But I can make myself think that I can indeed transform my body and my physical capabilities from one winter to the next. It sure seems much more plausible than transforming my body in a month, which is about how long I have to enjoy the tree, festooned with white twinkle lights outside my living room window, before I need to put it in the ground. This requires an even greater feat of strength than dragging the tree out of my pickup truck. Because I cannot get the tree back into the pickup truck, I have nothing but my wits and my muscles – mostly my wits – to walk the tree, all while battling friction and pine needles to my face, from my living room window to the Yuletide forest and the too-shallow hole I tried to dig after the ground had frozen. Still, somehow, I have survived this odyssey every year, and so have the trees. We will more likely than not survive it this year, too. The forest will not be any taller, but it will be one tree bigger, and I will swell with pride every time I gaze upon it instead of doing a workout. In the spirit of frankness – in for a penny, in for a pound – I sure hope the birds don’t hurl on it. – Zach Hively
SignoftheDownfall:
Thumbin’It Score one for the wildlife. The La Plata Open Space Conservancy is putting 500 acres of prime forest land north of town, seen as an important migration corridor, into a permanent easement.
Continued Roe v. Wade fallout, with a new AP report finding women seeking abortions having to wait several weeks, leading to costlier, more complicated and sometimes riskier procedures.
A “major breakthrough” at the climate summit in Dubai this week, with 170 countries agreeing to a transition away from fossil fuels. The language is nonbinidng, but hey, admitting to a problem is the first step in recovery.
Don’t hate us. We know we really, really, really need the snow – but could it just not totally dump Thursday morning when we’re delivering papers? No one likes a soggy Telegraph.
The Womens Professional Hockey League, aka WPHL, is set to drop the puck Jan. 1, with six teams: Toronto, Montreal, Ottawa, Boston, Minnesota and New York. It’s about time, cuz girls are players, too.
4 n Dec. 14, 2023
A new study confirming what a lot of us know: the USPS is struggling in Colorado mountain towns due to staffing shortages, lack of space and high cost of living, leading to stressed out and tired delivery people. So be nice – and maybe cut your delivery person some slack (cookies help, too).
telegraph
Multiplying like habits Steve Lubanski bought his girlfriend, Candace Frazee, a stuffed rabbit for Valentine’s Day in 1993, and then Candace bought Steve a porcelain rabbit for Easter. But one of the gifts was cursed by a witchdoctor (probably) because Steve and Candace spent the next 30 years shopping insatiably for rabbit-themed items. Their collection outgrew the household in ’17, so they opened “The Bunny Museum,” and this year, their 40,550-piece collection won the Guinness World Record for largest rabbit/thing collection. But really, we should be worried about the rabbit collector who just lost his crown, because the thirst for revenge can be ear-resistible.
telegraph
Dec. 14, 2023 n 5
WritersontheRange This holiday season, care for those you love ... include yourself.
Chasing the dream Ski bum culture faceplanting into mountain town reality by Heather Hansman
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6 n Dec. 14, 2023
early two decades ago, I moved to the mountains to be a ski bum, chasing snow. I was a stereotype – an East Coast kid pulled west by the promise of bigger adventures and higher mountain ranges. I was also part of a counterculture that rejected social norms in favor of 100-day ski seasons. In ski towns in western Colorado in 2005, risk was everywhere, but in a way that felt exciting. I liked the brag of drinking too much, and I was too naïve to notice harder drugs. Climate change seemed theoretical, and no one I knew had died in the mountains yet. Corporate entities were just starting to binge-buy resorts while I somehow thought that living in my car was cool and I could exist like that forever. But myths are complicated things to keep alive, and I eventually left ski towns to work as a writer, already seeing the ski-bum dream changing. I saw friends struggling to build careers, families and community while still chasing the fragile dream that a powder day topped almost everything. So recently, I went back to see what was going on, to try to track the evolution of what had been my own obsession. I looped through mountain towns across the West, from Aspen to Victor, Idaho, and Big Sky, Mont., to assess the current state of ski bums. What I found was that everyone trying to build a life in those towns was struggling, from my old colleagues who had stuck around and wished they’d bought real estate to “lifties” fresh out of school. “A lot of people here are living a fantasy I can’t obtain,” Malachi Artice, a 20-something skier working multiple jobs in Jackson, Wyo., said. At the most basic level, the math just didn’t work. In most mountain towns, it’s now nearly impossible to work a single full-time service job – the kind that resort towns depend on – and afford rent. The pressure shows up in nearly everything, including abysmal mental health outcomes like anxiety and depression. Ski towns have some of the highest suicide rates in the country, and social
services haven’t expanded to meet demand. Racial gaps are also widening in an industry that often depends on undocumented immigrants to fill the poorly paid but necessary jobs that keep a tourist town running. On top of all that, abundant snowfall, the basis of a ski resort’s economy, is getting cooked by climate change. And sure, you can argue skiing is superficial and unimportant, but ski towns – some of the most elite and economically unequal places in the country – are microcosms for the way our social fabric is splitting. Ski towns face crucial, complicated questions: Can they build affordable housing and also preserve open space? What happens when health care workers or teachers won’t take jobs, because they can’t find a way to live in the community they serve? Will a town willingly curb growth when that’s what supports the tax base? There are no easy answers because the problems are entrenched in both that slow-moving nostalgia that stymies change, and in the downhill rush of capitalism, which gives power to whoever pays the most. The housing
telegraph
market tilts toward high-end real estate instead of modestly priced homes for essential workers. What we value shapes our lives, and so I think we must hold the ski industry to higher standards. If these rarefied places can find ways to support working as well as leisure-based communities, they could serve as lessons for change elsewhere. During my tour, I saw necessary workers in the ski industry facing hard economic choices, but I also saw positive, community-scale change. In Alta, Utah, for instance, the arts nonprofit Alta Community Enrichment added mental health support, because its employees reported an urgent need. If ski-resort towns are going to survive, the lives of their workers need to matter, and that means caring about them – from affordable housing to accessible mental health support. ■ Heather Hansman is a contributor to Writers on the Range, writersontherange.org, an independent nonprofit dedicated to spurring lively conversation about the West. She is the author of “Powder Days: Ski Bums, Ski Towns and the Future of Chasing Snow” and lives in Durango.
SoapBox The Lone Road Tree
The lone road Christmas tree quietly grows out there, near the highway, belonging to no one, bending to the wind.
They say greenery is a symbol of what we can ignore or recognize within ourselves. Branches, a reminder of reaching out in kindness and care.
Somehow, because of its quiet presence we may foster the joy of giving from within the shadow of a longing heart. – Burt Baldwin, Ignacio
Tax non-residents more
With Colorado’s teachers pay ranked 49th in the USA, we in Colorado should be outraged. I think the state should increase home taxes on non-residence
D-Tooned/by Rob Pudim homeowners. We charge non-residents more money to buy elk hunting licenses. Residents pay $63; nonresidents pay $761 – they don’t even blink an eye. Non-residents who own a home in Colorado don’t vote, pay Colorado income tax or register vehicles here. But they use our parks, roads, forests and lakes. I think that the extra tax on nonresident homes could be used to increase teachers pay and for forest fire prevention, law enforcement, roads and parks. We homeowners and Colorado residents pay most of the bills. Contact your representative if you like this idea – or dislike it. This will only help Colorado and may help the residents of Colorado keep home taxes down. – Bob Battani, Durango
A public emergency Loud industrial noises along 32nd Street in the early stages of overnight hours have left me wondering what’s going on along the corridor. There is no real industry, nowhere where big trucks idle and just a bunch of McMansions and housing developments. I think we
need a conversation about unmitigated growth, incompetent city management and incompetent planning and zoning boards.
telegraph
When do we make all this a public emergency and demand change? – Christa Turnell, Durango
Dec. 14, 2023 n 7
TopStory
Grapes of wrath? Local liquor stores take a hit with wine sales but remain optimistic by Missy Votel
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early a year after Colorado voters narrowly agreed to allow folks to buy wine with their oat milk and avocados, local liquor stores aren’t quite dying on the vine. But they’re not exactly popping the cork, either. “It’s had a really, really big impact,” Mark Raymond, manager of Wagon Wheel Liquors said. “And it doesn’t just affect liquor stores. It affects everyone in town.” He was referring to Proposition 125. Passed in November 2022, it allows sales of wine in big box and grocery stores, which began stocking wine March 1. (Full-strength beer has been available in grocery stores since 2019.) James Dempsey, who bought Wagon Wheel in August 2021, did not want to discuss specific percentages, but suffice to say his hit in wine sales is a double-digit drop in the barrel. Beer sales saw a more modest decrease while liquor sales remained about steady this year, he added. On the other side of town, Mike Vermette, manager of Star Liquors, said since last March, total sales there are down 25% – the lion’s share of which he attributed to wine sales. Star has been hit particularly hard, he said, because 40% of its overall sales typically come from wine vs. only 20% from beer. More telling than sales volume, Dempsey said, is the number of shoppers coming through his door. Now that people can buy a bottle of wine while fetching groceries, they’re less inclined to make that extra trip to the liquor store. According to Dempsey, customer traffic at his store is down about 10 % this year over last. Star reports a similar trend, but Vermette notes that smaller stores that may not have as sophisticated tracking methods may be faring even worse. “A lot don’t even know how badly they’re getting their butts kicked,” said Vermette. And with winter tourism season coming, he said it may only get worse. “January, February and March are big tourist months,” he said, adding that tourists may not have the allegiance to independent liquor stores that locals do. “A lot of them may think, ‘There’s wine and beer at the grocery store, great, I’ll buy it there.’” Dempsey said it’s this local allegiance – along with his store’s location downtown – that has helped his store weather the Prop 125 hangover. “If we didn’t have those regulars, I think we’d be in worse shape,” he said. Wagon Wheel has 11 employees and Star about 13 – and both stores report not having to make any layoffs because of the downturn. “It’s made things tighter,” said Dempsey. “I haven’t had to lay people off, but that’s by choice.” However, one area where local liquor stores may be forced to make cutbacks is donations, such as for fundraisers and nonprofits.
8 n Dec. 14, 2023
Mike Vermette, manager of Star Liquors, shows off but a small sampling of the store’s wine selection. Since grocery stores started selling wine last March, Star’s sales are down. To compete, the store has begun using yellow tags to highlight wines that are only available at Star./ Photo by Missy Votel “A bigger impact that people don’t think about is philanthropy and giving back,” Vermette said. He said he expects there will be “significant adjustments” to what the store will be able to give away in the coming year, adding that paying his staff will be the biggest priority. Dempsey echoed this sentiment, saying that in 2022, Wagon Wheel donated upwards of $50,000 in product. “A big part of why we bought this store is because we wanted to give back to the community,” said Dempsey, who owns the store with his partner, Christi Williams. “That’s something the grocery stores certainly are not doing.” Trickling down The Colorado Licensed Beverage Association, which represents the state’s small liquor retailers, estimates one-third of small liquor stores in Colorado will go out of business as a result of Prop 145. Although the expansion of full-strength beer sales didn’t necessarily diminish the number of liquor stores in Colorado, losing wine sales could push some over the edge. “We have begun to see a lot of stores struggling,” Chris Fine, executive director of the CLBA, told Colorado Public Radio recently. He added that the extent of the impact depends a lot on where a store is located.
telegraph
Stores near supermarkets are having a difficult time no matter what part of the state they’re in, he said. One local store that seems isolated from that trend is River Liquors, which is adjacent to Nature’s Oasis on the south end of town. River Liquors – which is owned by Jeff and Sherri Watson, who also own Nature’s Oasis – is in a unique situation in that Nature’s Oasis does not sell alcohol. Even so, Jeff Watson said River Liquors is still feeling the pinch – though not as severe as what other local mom and pops are feeling. “It would be impossible to say it hasn’t affected us,” Watson said. “But I wouldn’t say it’s as much as what some other stores are seeing. We’re a little bit farther away out here and have a little bit more of a captivated audience.” Aside from the effects on individual stores, liquor store owners also point out there is a larger price for the convenience of supermarket wine. For starters, there is the all-important multiplier effect, whereby money spent at locally owned stores goes farther in the local economy than money spent at a chain, which is often siphoned off elsewhere. “Money spent at City Market doesn’t stay here,” said Wagon Wheel’s Raymond. “It goes to a big corporation.”
Watson also pointed out that the dream of increased sales, and thus increased tax revenues, from grocery store wine sales has yet to be realized. In fact, with grocery stores selling at lower prices, the exact opposite may be happening. “You get the same consumption at lower prices, which lowers sales taxes,” he said. “It’s taking money out of city coffers, and we’re taking money out of Colorado – all so people don’t have to walk across the parking lot.” No whining Despite the downturn in liquor store wine sales, it is not all sour grapes. Liquor store owners say they’ve seen the change coming for some time now, and the competition has given them an opportunity to up their game. “No one should have been surprised by this,” said Vermette. “We knew it was a possibility for over a decade.” He added that booze sales will probably be the next shoe to drop, with liquor likely being approved for sale in grocery stores in the next few years. With this in mind, he and other store owners say they have been working on that all-important post-pandemic buzzword: pivoting. Such tactics include loyalty programs, delivery, apps, wine or bourbon of the month clubs, and case and happy hour discounts. Wagon Wheel also recently upgraded its delivery truck and underwent an extreme makeover of its 60-year-old store. Smaller liquor stores also emphasize the “personal touch” – greeting customers when they walk in the door and offering product recommendations and expertise not available at a large grocery store. “We have combined more than 100 years of restaurant and industry experience,” Dempsey boasted of his staff. In addition, many stores have shifted away from the
“usual suspects” of mainstream wine – although they still offer them – to feature more unique, lesser-known but high quality labels. “We’ve moved to becoming more of a ‘bottle shop’ and having some nicer wines,” Dempsey said. “We are trying to pivot to other wines that are similarly priced and better.” At Star, they now feature “yellow tags,” which signify wines that are only available there. Fellow manager Tamara Vermette, wife of Mike, also noted that Star tries all of the wine it sells in order to provide better tasting notes and “to make sure they’re not poisonous.” (Don’t worry! She was kidding about the poison part, but not the sampling part.) In fact, changing up offerings to smaller or lesser known wineries is one way small stores can compete with the purchase power of the corporate giants, which buy in massive quantities or use rebates to incentivize sellers. Watson spoke of a brand of wine being sold at a certain big box store in town for $7 under what anyone else can sell it for. “They’re selling it at prices that we can’t even buy it for,” he said. Vermette echoed the concern, but was sober-eyed about the competition. “We’re not victims here,” he said. “Everyone has the right to make money. We just want to be treated on a fair playing field.” He said his hope is that once the buzz of grocery store wine wears off –much like the excitement of a new restaurant in town – folks will be back. “They’ll realize we’re still a better deal,” Vermette said.
Wagon Wheel owner James Dempsey talks in his office last week. The bottle of whiskey in the foreground is part of the store’s new “bourbon of the month” promotion./ Photo by Missy Votel Dempsey said he believes the low prices at the grocery stores are only to entice people. Once people change their buying habits, the prices will level out to be more in line with what liquor stores charge. And, he prefers to look at the past year as a “reset” – much like what other businesses went through with the pandemic. “I’m pretty confident we’ve hit the peak of the damage,” said Dempsey. “I think it’s going to go up from here. It’s been longer days, longer hours, but we’re just going to keep doing what we’re doing.” ■
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telegraph
Dec. 14, 2023 n 9
GossipoftheCyclers
Slip, sliding away Winter riding is sketchy but with a few tips, can be fun (no, really) by Jennaye Derge
F
rom what I remember of last winter, it didn’t start snowing – I mean, really snowing – until New Year's Eve. Then it didn’t stop snowing for two weeks after that; and, or, until April. During that two-week time period in early winter, I was also very sick. I’d gotten the flu, or COVID, or some combination of the two that kept me in bed and not shoveling the area around my vehicle. The result was a very stuck truck. Any time I thought about driving somewhere because it was cold, I’d kick at the icebergs clutching at my wheels and I’d say to my stubbed toe, “She ain’t goin’ nowhere.” Which was fine, because as we all know, I usually don’t drive anyway. So I just put on one more layer of clothing, both for warmth and for padding just in
case I slid on ice and fell on the ground, and rode my bike to work. And, for that matter, everywhere else the rest of the winter. I rode through the slipperiest, spiciest areas around Durango. My daily commute took me through the notorious Antarcticas – the sidewalk next to Backcountry Experience that’s never seen a shovel; the Rotary Park Bridge that plunges you into icebergs; and a totally nondescript intersection on W. Second Avenue that pools into an ice rink. It was the latter that I slipped and fell on the most. Neighbors were likely watching, probably cackling, as I’d usually make some weird “wwhooaaa ooohheeeyy” grunting noise, throw my foot down and catch myself and my bike before mayhem ensued. I’d giggle a bunch, and then be on my merry way. Only once did I fall so drastically that I ended up fully on the ground, groceries strewn
POWER IT FORWARD
WITH LPEA’S GIVING TREE Donate and help your neighbors keep the lights on this holiday season.
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Venmo us @GivingTree_LPEA (or scan the QR code) 2. Call us at (970) 247-5786 3. Drop off your donation at our office in Durango or Pagosa Springs. Donations will be accepted through January 31st, 2024.
www.lpea.coop | (970) 247-5786 10 n Dec. 14, 2023
telegraph
about, oranges rolling everywhere, my chain flopping off the cassette, and me having to wave well-meaning brethren off as they asked me if I was OK and if they could help. Yes, riding in the winter can be tricky and slippery and sometimes a little cold. But if done right, it can be more fun and less stressful than spinning 360 degrees in a Ford 150 on Camino del Rio. Or unburying a car from snow, or scraping off a windshield when you’re already running your normal 15 minutes late. If done right, riding in the winter can be really fun. First, I’d suggest picking a good bike, more so, a good set of tires. I manage to get through many winters on an old hardtail mountain bike, but last year, I often rode my heavy steel frame cargo bike. It was mostly a wild ride, and I was finally beaten down enough last year that I put on studded tires and bought a fat
bike for the really bad days. But, trust that any larger tire (at a slightly lower tire pressure) with tread should do just fine. The second most important thing, I’d say, is how you ride. Number one: if you’re going through a big ice patch or slush patch or whatever, pick your line and stick with it. Look ahead and go as an arrow. Don’t try to surf the slushy ice waves unless you’re willing and able to get knocked around. If you have to move over or turn, go slow, go wide, keep your weight back and turn with your hips. Try to hit the slush bumps straight on, and get ready for some splashing. If you are a mountain biker, you will have an advantage because it’s sort of like mountain biking, but slippery. If you need to get off your bike and walk, there is no shame in that. I’ve walked my bike a few times in front of impatient cars on Third Avenue in the deep chasms of slush where they forgot to plow. We all survived and moved on with our days. Then, of course, there is braking. Braking on ice on a bike is the same as braking on ice in a vehicle: gentle, feathered, predicted and predictable. Start braking before you need to, and try not to slam on your brakes, unless that’s what you want to do. If you want to slide around all willy-
nilly on your bike, caution to the wind, “yeeee hawww get in maw, it’s gonna’ get rowdy,” throw out all this advice and just go for it, because different from a vehicle, you probably won’t kill anyone if you slide around haphazardly having a hoot’n hollr’n good time. Besides all of that, I’d say wear warm clothes, bonus if they are waterproof, maybe try out some eye-pro to keep your eyes shielded from cold wind and snow (I’ve seen ski goggles. I just wear my reading glasses. You do you) and remember your bike lights for the ride home. Of course, a helmet is not a bad idea, although a winter hat sometimes makes that difficult. In all, riding in the winter, especially in the snow, is fun. You don’t have to deal with getting your car stuck in a snowbank, scraping your windshield or spinning out of control like an amusement park ride gone haywire. Many will argue with me, but I think it’s a lot less dangerous than putting a 5,000-pound vehicle on the ice-rink streets and seeing what happens. You might have to be thoughtful with what you wear, but you also don’t actually get as cold as you think you will because you are moving and working your heart and muscles. So as the winter sets in, the snow ap-
The author on a bike. In the snow. And laughing. Granted this was at the Silverton White Out, and tequila may or may not have been involved (which we would never condone.) proaches and you’re getting bummed about not being able to ride your bike, I challenge you to try riding your bike
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anyway. It’s fun, it’s a little spicy and you show up everywhere warm, albeit, a little wet, but mostly happy. ■
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telegraph
Dec. 14, 2023 n 11
StufftoDo
Thursday14
Alice in Winterland costume party with chick rock band Pussyfoot, 6:30 p.m., The Subterrain, 900 Main Ave., Ste F
Sunday17
Business After Hours networking, 5-7 p.m., TBK Bank
“A Christmas Carol – A Radio Play,” presented by Durango Theatreworks, 7 p.m., Fort Lewis College Main Stage Theater
Vinyl Sundaze, 12 noon, Lola’s Place, 725 E. 2nd Ave.
“A Ghost Tale for Mr. Dickens Jr. / The Claw,” 7-9 p.m., Durango Arts Center
“A Christmas Carol – A Radio Play,” presented by Durango Theatreworks, 2 p.m., Fort Lewis College Main Stage Theater
Aria PettyOne presents Aria’s Pizza Party, 8:30-9:30 p.m., Father’s Daughters Pizza, 640 Main Ave.
“A Ghost Tale for Mr. Dickens Jr. / The Claw,” 2-4 p.m., Durango Arts Center
Start-Up Support, 12 noon-1 p.m., Center for Innovation, 835 Main Ave., Ste. 225.
Thursday Night Sitting Group, 5:30 p.m., Durango Dharma Center, 1800 E 3rd Ave., Ste. 109 Bluegrass Jam, 6 p.m., Durango Beer & Ice, 3000 Main Ave. “Giant Beasts Tiny People,” film presented by FLC’s Outdoor Pursuits, 6 p.m., Ska Brewing
DJ Party, 9 p.m.-2 a.m., Roxy’s, 693 Main Ave.
Trivia Night, 6:30 p.m., Powerhouse Science Center, 1330 Camino del Rio.
Deadline for “Stuff to Do” submissions is Monday at noon. To submit an item, email: calendar@durangotelegraph.com
“A Christmas Carol – A Radio Play,” presented by Durango Theatreworks, 7 p.m., Fort Lewis College Main Stage Theater Drag Trivia Night, 7:30 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.
Friday15
Free Friday Yoga, 8:30 a.m., Lively (a boutique), 809 Main Ave. Idea Validation Networking Event, 9-10 a.m., Center for Innovation, Main Mall, 835 Main Ave., Ste. 225 Gary B. Walker, 10:15 a.m.-12 noon, Jean-Pierre Bakery & Restaurant, 601 Main Ave. Sitting with Peace, 12 p.m., meditation, Durango Dharma Center, 1800 E 3rd Ave., Ste. 109 SJMA’s Christmas Trees for Conservation Tree Lot, 12 noon-6 p.m., Durango & Silverton Narrow Gauge Railroad parking lot Fanny Pack Fridays, 3 p.m., The Nugget Mountain Bar, 48721 North Highway 550 Jack Ellis & Larry Carver play, 5:30 p.m., Diamond Belle, 699 Main Ave.
Saturday16
Cookies and Cocoa with Santa, 10 a.m.-2 p.m., TBK Bank “Caring for our Community through Creativity,” 10 a.m.-4 p.m., Durango Arts Center Community Art Fair, 11 a.m.-4 p.m., Lumien Apartments, 3180 E Animas Village Dr. Photos with Santa, 11 a.m.-2 p.m., Durango Harley-Davidson, 750 South Camino Del Rio “A Ghost Tale for Mr. Dickens Jr. / The Claw,” 2-4 p.m. & 7-9 p.m., Durango Arts Center “A Christmas Carol – A Radio Play,” presented by Durango Theatreworks, 2 & 7 p.m., Fort Lewis College Main Stage Theater Pasta Night Fundraiser, 3 p.m., American Legion, 878 E. 2nd Ave. Live music by Ben Gibson, 5:30 p.m., The Office Spiritorium Women’s Prerogative Barbershop Quartet, 68 p.m., EsoTerra Ciderworks, 558 Main Ave. Karaoke, 6 p.m., Durango Beer & Ice, 3000 Main
Chapman Hill Holiday Show on Ice, 6-7:30 p.m., Chapman Hill Ice Rink
Community Yoga, 6-7 p.m., Yoga Durango, 1485 Florida Rd. Donations accepted.
Friday Dance! 6 p.m. West Coast swing lesson, 7 p.m. dance of the month lesson, 8-10 p.m. open dancing, VFW, durangodancing.com
EDM Party, 9 p.m.-1 a.m., Roxy’s, 693 Main Ave.
12 n Dec. 14, 2023
Silent Disco, 10 p.m.-12:30 a.m., 11th St. Station.
telegraph
Toys for Tots & Veterans Benefit Breakfast with Santa, 9-11 a.m., VFW
Feed the People! free aid for homeless community members, 2 p.m., Buckley Park. Sunday Funday, 6 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.
Monday18
Ukulele Jam, 5 p.m., Durango Coffee Co., 730 Main Ave. Happy Hour Yoga, 5:30 p.m., Ska Brewing, 225 Girard St. Comedy Showcase, 7:30 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave. Meditation and Dharma Talk, 5:30 p.m., Durango Dharma Center, 1800 E. 3rd Ave., Ste. 109, or at www.durangodharmacenter.org
Tuesday19
Community Yoga, 4:30-5:30 p.m., Yoga Durango, 1485 Florida Rd. Donations accepted.
Slow Bluegrass Jam, 5:30-7:30 p.m., General Palmer Hotel, 567 Main Ave. Open Mic Night, 7 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.
Wednesday20
Morning Serenity: Small Group Meditation, 8-9:15 a.m., Durango Dharma Center, 1800 E. 3rd Ave., Ste. 109
Restorative Yoga for Cancer, 9:30-10:45 a.m., no cost for cancer patients, survivors and caregivers, Smiley Building, 1309 E. 3rd Ave. Info and register at cancersupportswco.org/calendar
AskRachel
Don’t nog it till you try it, no rain checks and all a-bored Interesting fact: If the dictionary is to be believed, nog is a strong ale that used to be brewed in parts of England. So strong, I bet it went straight to your noggin. Dear Rachel, What the heck is a nog, anyway? We have egg nog but no other kind of nog. Which makes me wonder why we have to qualify egg nog with the egg. We say “pumpkin beer” because we have other beers without pumpkin. So help us out. What other kinds of nog should we have been drinking all this time? – Egghead Dear Egg Noggin, We live in an enterprising age. I think it’s high time someone comes up with all the other kinds of nog and takes them for a spin. I mean, cannabis nog, obvi. An IPA nog. But then let’s branch beyond the standards. Savory nogs: sausage nog, broccoli nog, turkey nog. And the sweet! Chocolate nog, strawberry nog, crème brulee nog. Whatever doesn’t work, just put an -o at the end: nogo. – Nog in agreement, Rachel Dear Rachel, Why do people think they can take a rain check when I offer things to them? This just
happened when I invited a friend to stay for dinner. “No, but I’ll take a rain check,” she said. B, this isn’t a standing offer. You were already here, I have food that needs cooked, you think you can just call me up sometime and cash in the offer whenever you please? – Rain Check Yourself Dear Developmentally Rain Delayed, Oh come on. This is just a nice way of saying no. No one in history has called up and said, “I’ll take you up on that rain check now.” The only time this happens is when an actual ticket person hands you an actual rain check, like at the circus or a baseball game. Or if you’re that person who holds up the grocery line to get a rain check for pinto beans at 25 cents off. – It’s pouring, Rachel Dear Rachel, Never mind we have the Polar Express in our back yard. My family decided to drive to Chama to ride a different train that’s the exact same but without the licensing. It was sweet but ultimately unexciting. The kids met Santa and seemed happy. But I just wanted to be on my phone (except reception was crap). Have I lost my childlike wonder? Or have we just over-romanticized something really boring? – Not On Board
Live music by Ben Gibson, 5:30 p.m., Public House 701, 701 E. 2nd Ave.
”Ec(h)o,” woodwork and art of Ted Moore, thru Jan. 5, 2024, 11th Street
Bar D Wranglers 2023 Christmas Jubilee, Dec. 20, 7:30 p.m., Community Concert Hall at FLC, durangoconcerts.com
“The Return of the Force,” FLC’s Center for Southwest Studies.
Geeks Who Drink Trivia, 8 p.m., The Roost, 128 E. College Dr. Karaoke Roulette, 8 p.m., Starlight Lounge, 937 Main Ave.
Ongoing
The artwork of Louisa Palmer in the Recess Gallery, Studio &, 1027 Main.
telegraph@durangotelegraph.com Dear Big Engine That Couldn’t, You completely lost your childlike wonder. What happened to being thrilled at trains, road trips and anything out of the ordinary? What happened to Santa being the most magical sight? Remember when you were young and didn’t question things like shouldn’t we have better things to do right now and what is a nog anyway? You just accepted the magic of the world for what it is. May we all reclaim some of that this season. – Pure cheer, Rachel
Upcoming
Solstice Bonfire, Dec. 21, 5-7 p.m., Pine River Library, Bayfield Solstice Party, Dec. 21, 6:30 p.m., The Subterrain, 900 Main Ave., Ste. F Santa & Mrs. Claus Visit, Dec. 22, 23:30 p.m., Purgatory Resort
Tina Miely Broker Associate
(970) 946-2902 tina@BHHSco.com
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Dec. 14, 2023 n 13
FreeWillAstrology by Rob Brezsny
tween a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world.” Your fate in recent weeks has been more challenging than seductive. You’ve been pressed to work on dilemmas. But this is about to change. Up ahead, life is seductive and welcoming. Are you prepared to drop any attachment you have to your discomfort to make the transition?
ARIES (March 21-April 19): In 1849, Harriet Tubman escaped from enslavement in Maryland. She could have enjoyed her new freedom but instead resolved to liberate others. During 13 bold forays into enemy territory, she rescued 70 enslaved people. She testified that she relied on her dreams and visions to carry out her heroic acts. They revealed to her the best escape routes and information about how to avoid “slave catchers.” I invite you to be like Tubman and seek guidance from your dreams in coming weeks to solve problems or seek bliss.
TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Jack Nicholson often plays mavericks and anti-heroes in his movies. His life off screen has also been less than steady. For example, he has fathered six children with five women. Fellow actor Carrie Fisher said Jack was “fun because he doesn’t make sense.” Some might be surprised that Nicholson is a Taurus, a tribe not typically known for eccentricity. But, Nicholson has the brash planet Uranus near his sun in Taurus, indicating he’s quirky. I have known plenty of Tauruses whose commitment to being themselves makes them idiosyncratic. These themes will be in play for you in coming weeks. GEMINI (May 21-June 20): The platitude says that if life gives us lemons, we should make lemonade. I’ve got a variation on this. Consider the Neva River in northwestern Russia. During the winter of 1739-40, Empress Anna Ioannovna ordered her workers to cut blocks of ice from the river to construct a magnificent palace. She filled it with furniture and art, making it a hub of festivities celebrating Russia’s triumph over the Ottoman Empire. I suspect in coming weeks, you will have substantial redemptive power. Whether you make lemonade or an ice palace is up to you. CANCER (June 21-July 22): “If the world were merely seductive, that would be easy,” Cancerian author E. B. White wrote. “If it were merely challenging, that would be no problem. But I arise in the morning torn be-
LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): I want to prepare you for the delights of the coming days. So I give you the thoughts of Leo psychologist Carl Jung: “It is important to have a secret, a premonition of things unknown,” he said. “We must sense that we live in a mysterious world – that things happen and can be experienced that remain inexplicable; that not everything can be anticipated … Only then is life whole.” VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Have you taken a break lately? Maybe a soothing sabbatical? Have you treated yourself to a respite from the grind? If not, please do so soon. And while you are recharging your psychic batteries, I ask you to give your fantasy life room to wander. Your imagination needs to be fed with gourmet food for thought. For the sake of your soul’s health, I hope you dream up fantastic, unruly, outrageous possibilities. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): My Uncle Ned advised me, “The best gift you can compel your ego to accept is to make it your servant instead of your master.” A Buddhist teacher sounded a related theme when she told me, “The best things in life are most likely to come your way if you periodically shed all hope and practice being completely empty.” Libra, you’re in a phase when the moral of your story is that there is no apparent moral to your story – at least until you surrender your notions of what the moral of your story is. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Scorpios are mostly likely to benefit from being empathetic – you have substantial power to thrive by reading other people’s feelings. You are often able to figure out angles that enable you to gather what you want while helping
$14 500mg GoldWater Carts:
$7 1g Pre-Rolls: (limit 15)
1000mg MAMMOTH Syringes:
$11 1000mg MAMMOTH Carts: MAMMOTH Farms 927 HWY 3, Durango 970.422.3282
14 n Dec. 14, 2023
$11 Sale runs through Dec. 31
*OTD pricing, while supplies last, 21+
telegraph
SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Pharaoh Tutankhamun died over 3,300 years ago. When he was placed in his tomb, treasures left included a pot of honey, meant to sweeten his travels in the afterlife. In the early 20th century, archaeologists excavated the site and dared to sample the honey, finding it tasty and fresh. Amazingly, longevity is a characteristic of most honey. Use this as a metaphor for your life. What past resources or experiences could be of value now? CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Screenwriter John Patrick Shanley writes, “Life holds its miracles, good erupting from darkness chief among them.” I predict a comparable miracle for you, though I suspect it will arise out of confusion rather than darkness. My advice: Don’t be so bogged down that you miss signs that a great awakening is nigh. Start rehearsing how you will feel when deliverance arrives. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): When he was 31, Aquarian Charles Dickens experienced financial instability. The situation got desperate, and he took extreme measures. In October 1843, he obsessively began writing “A Christmas Carol.” It was published Dec. 19 and sold out in a few days. Within a year, 13 editions were released. Dickens’ economic worries were over. I think the near future will be a favorable time for you, too, to take dramatic action to fix a problem. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Many religious people believe God can hear their prayers and intervene. Other religious folks think God can hear their prayers but may not intervene. Then there are non-religious folks who don’t believe in God and think praying is useless. Wherever you might be on the spectrum, you will have extra access to benefaction in coming weeks – whether from God, fate, nature or humans. Seek out blessings and assistance. Be receptive to all helpers.
Check out our hot drink menu and housemade adult egg nog
1000mg GoldWater Carts:
$4/ea. or 3g for $10
others to gather what they want. You are potentially a genius at doing what’s best for everyone and getting rewarded for it. According to my analysis, this knack of yours will soon be operating at peak levels.
1135 Main Ave. • DGO, CO
Winter hours: Mon. - Thurs., 12-8pm • Fri., 12-10pm Sat., 11am-10pm • Sunday 11am-6pm
classifieds
Deadline for Telegraph classified ads is Tuesday at noon. Ads are a bargain at 10 cents a character with a $5 minimum. Even better, ads can now be placed online: durangotelegraph.com Prepayment is required via cash, credit card or check. (Sorry, no refunds or substitutions.)
Ads can be submitted via: n www.durangotelegraph.com n classifieds@durango telegraph.com n 970-259-0133 n 679 E. 2nd Ave., #E2 Approximate office hours: Mon-Wed: 9ish - 5ish Thurs: On delivery Fri: Gone fishing; call first
Announcements Friday 7pm Dancing now at VFW Go to DurangoDancing.com to get on notification list. KDUR is Celebrating 50 years of broadcasting in 2025. With that anniversary fast approaching, staff is on the hunt for past DJs. Maybe you did a show for one year, maybe you did a show for 10. However long that was, hopefully you have a fond memory, a story or maybe even some recorded material! If you do, please email station manager Bryant Liggett, Liggett_b@fortlewis.edu or call 970.247.7261
Classes/Workshops
appliance and other metal drop off. 970-259-3494.
Now Receiving new clients. Melanie Higbee LMT, 970.238.0422
Lost/Found
Holiday Special A therapeutic massage, best gift ever. Buy four 60min gift certificates, get $40 off; three 90min, get $30 off durangomobilemassage.com Offer ends 12/20/23
Found: Ski poles found Molas Pass Parking lot, Sunday Nov. 26 call to describe 9703855480
ForSale TaoTronics 4k Action Camera New and in the box. Comes with user guide and all accessories that came with it: waterproof housing, handlebar/pole mount, mounts, battery, tethers, protective back cover, USB cable and lens cleaning cloth. $50. J.marie.pace@gmail.com
Lotus Path Healing Arts Unique, intuitive fusion of Esalen massage, deep tissue & Acutonics, To schedule call Kathryn, 970-201-3373.
CommunityService The Maker Lab in Bodo Park Collaborative workspace, learning
HaikuMovieReview ‘Killers of the Flower Moon’ Intimate deceit and torment perpetrated by selfish monsters – Lainie Maxson opportunities and equipment featuring metal and woodworking, laser cutting, 3D printing, and sewing. To learn more, go to www.themakerlab.org Free Grief Counseling for children, teens and young adults with one of our graduate interns. Please contact us below if interested. Email: griefcenterswco@gmail.com
Reruns Home Furnishings Brighten up your space. Lots of new inventory including serving and glassware for the holidays, and cool furniture, lamps and decor. Looking to consign smaller furniture pieces. 572 E. 6th Ave. Open Mon.-Sat. 385-7336.
Services Harmony Cleaning and Organizing Residential, offices, commercial and vacation rentals, 970-403-6192.
Learn to Square Dance Start the new year with something fun and healthy! 4-week free introduction to square dance starts Monday, January 15th with Caller Carla Roberts of Wild West Squares. Pre-register now by calling 970-903-6478. Singles welcome.
Wanted Cash for Vehicles, Copper, Alum Etc. at RJ Metal Recycle. Also free
Lowest Prices on Storage! Inside/outside storage near Durango and Bayfield. 10-x-20, $130. Outside spots: $65, with discounts available. RJ Mini Storage. 970-259-3494.
BodyWork Massage by Meg Bush LMT, 30, 60 & 90 min., 970-7590199. Compassionate, Informed myofascial massage and structural integration, offering well-being and mind-body connection for 17 years.
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Dec. 14, 2023 n 15
16 n Dec. 14, 2023
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