A trend, a buzzword, a passing fad - self care has been called many things, but increasingly these days itś a tool for self-preservation. Why is self-care such a challenge? Knowing how important it is to take care of ourselves, why do we struggle so often to find the time or the energy to do it? Sometimes even to be kind to ourselves? Chances are, when you think of self-care, you picture any number of hobbies or activities you would love to fit into your day if only you had the time: massages, pedicures, a swim, a sunrise meditation. Social media is awash with smoothies, mantras and wellness rituals that are guaranteed to revolutionize your life. But while these pursuits are undoubtedly positive and beneficial, theyŕe only a part of your self-care story.
to be emotionally strong and she must still provide for them, but with less adult contact and outside support it’s a daily struggle.
The real challenge of self-care comes with learning to listen to yourself so that you can figure out your needs and address them. Feeling frazzled after a difficult day? Perhaps ten minutes standing in the back yard with a warm drink would give you the chance to reset. Struggling to get going after a particularly bad night’s sleep? Maybe take a few moments to sit quietly and focus on your breath.
Recognizing that her feelings were beginning to act against her well-being, she looked for a way to provide a boost to her day, a mental injection of positivity. She created her own self-care box. This act is practical, positive and proactive. She said: ¨I have to be my own advocate. My mental health has to come first otherwise I cannot be there for my children. They’re anxious and worried about the future of course, we all are, but if all I want to do is hide away and shut out the world, I can’t do anything to help them.¨
Finding a balance of different self-care rituals that fit with the way you feel and what your body is telling you means giving yourself permission to do whatever you need to at that moment, without feeling selfish. Whether that’s letting off steam, taking a little time to be alone, exercising or enjoying a piece of chocolate cake - it’s about what’s happening inside of you. Your well-being and wellness come first. It’s time to make time for yourself.
Jo’s box is a simple but effective gift to herself. Her favourite chocolate, a book, candles, some reminders of great vacations and times with her children. A few notes written to herself reminding her of her own self-worth become renegade acts of self-care that will see her through turbulent times. Acts of self-care will differ for every family, couple, or single set-up. It’s often seen as a deeply feminine term something men might struggle to access or apply to themselves. A concept that perhaps has run its course as wider society accepts the vital importance of robust mental health.
What gift can you give yourself? Jo is a 41 year old single mom to two teenagers. The new normalhas been tough on her. Her nearly but not quite adults require her 10
