Dircksey vol 4 ed4 online

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

1 DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4

VOLUME 4: ED. 4

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Get Involved, Get Experience, Get Published 2 DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4

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Dircksey Team Editor-in-Chief: Holly Ferguson editors@ecuguild.org.au Current Affairs Editor: Elisha Hammond dirckseycurrentaffairs@gmail.com

Lifestyle Editor: Adam Di Tuillo Marketing & Promotions: Lauren Reed l.reed@ecuguild.org.au

Art Editor: Zachary Sheridan dirckseyart.filmeditor@gmail.com

Logo: Sella Winadi The opinions expressed herein are not necessarily those of the Dircksey Editor(s), sub-editors/section-editors, Edith Cowan University or the Edith Cowan University Student Guild. Reasonable care is taken to ensure that Dircksey articles and other information are up-to-date and as accurate as possible, as of not the time of publication– Editor(s), but no responsibility can or will be Cowan taken Universityif by the abovementioned entities taken an issue of Dircksey has any errors or other omissions contained herein. accurate publication– taken issue omissions

Online print just got better.

pictondiy.com.au

CREDITS // VOL 4: ED.4

CONTRIBUTORS:

ARTISTS:

Abigale Larocca

Charlotte Scott @lotte.designs

Adam Di Tuillo

Clare Solano @chlorofluro_artist

Andrew Douglas

Darren Stapley www.darrenstapley.com

Christopher Spencer

Jackson Lavell-Lee @jackson_lavell

Elisha Hammond

Jesse Newell @newellcreative

Grace Flynn

Marcos Chavez @marcoschavez43

Holly Ferguson

Marshall Stay @Marshallarts

Jackson Lavell-Lee

Neel Goodwin @Kloudkat

Jess Nieuwenhuis

Shona Wong @somechuppy

Jesse Newell

Zoe Wolski @zoewolski

Krishna Aksa

MODELS:

Marcos Chavez Marley Amplett Rhys Gardiner

Courtney @courtshenri

Sabrina Johnston

Finn @trashbinfinn

Tristan Sherlock

Jarryd @prainthegayaway

Vanessa Vlajkovic

Jen @jen.bagg

Zachary Sheridan

Lawrence @lawrence_w_murphy

SPECIAL THANKS TO: Emily Smith Hyclass J.F.K Jess Nieuwenhuis Madison De Rozario

COVER ART: Brianda Delgado @GhostBandit1998

4 DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

socials

online www.dircksey.com

Facebook | facebook.com/dircksey Instagram | @dirckseymagazine Spotify | Dircksey Follow us for BTS, giveaways, events, updates & more

Head to our website for your daily dose of Dircksey. Updated daily, we publish reviews, interviews and a mix of engaging (& occassionally controversial) articles.

write & create www.dircksey.com Want to write with us or create art? We’re always looking for new people to join the team. If you’re interested email editors@ecuguild.org.au for more information. Or head to our Facebook page for details on our next contributors meeting (all are welcome).

DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4 5

CONTENTS // VOL 4: ED.4

FEATURES

06 EDITOR’S NOTE 07 WHAT’S ON 08 MILLENNIAL PINK PLAYLIST 10 SPONSORED 12 VIRTUAL ESCAPE BECOMES REALITY 13 ZINE 15 ZINE INSTRUCTIONS 16 A PUBLIC (TRANSPORT) PAIN IN THE ASS 18 IN THE NUDE 20 5 THINGS TO CONSIDER BEFORE BUYING A PET 22 A MAN’S COAST IS HIS CASTLE

29 BINGO 30 ON TRACK WITH: MADISON DE ROZARIO 32 MIRROR MIRROR 34 WHAT’S FOR DINNER 38 ARTIST FEATURE: DARREN STAPLEY 41 TOP 5 MYTHICAL PLACES THAT COULD BE REAL 42 SPOTLIGHT ON MODERN SLAVERY 44 WHAT YOU SHOULD

24 CAN’T GET NO EDUCATION

MUSIC

46 J.F.K 48 HYCLASS 50 MUSIC REVIEWS

FILM

51 THE LIFE AND DEATH OF A BAD IDEA: THE “POPULAR FILM” OSCAR 52 WHERE MY QUEERS AT? 54 FILM REVIEWS

LITERATURE

55 BOOK REVIEWS

CREATIVE

56 THE GAP YOU SPEAK 57 WHERE’S THE SUBTITLE?

6 DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4

END OF SEMESTER WINE TOUR Sunday November 4th 2018 11:00am - 5:00pm Drinks @ Black Swan Lunch @ Feral Brewing Co Duckstein Brewery

Guild Members: $22 Non-Guild Members: $32

Tickets: Bit.ly/ecuwine2018

EDITOR’S NOTE // VOL 4: ED.4

ALAS, MY MY TIME TIME HERE HERE IS IS DONE. DONE. ALAS, After two years editing Dircksey, it’s time for me to pass the baton (that’s the first and only sports reference I will ever write) onto a new editor. I won’t lie, these past two years have been pretty stressful. Coming into the job I felt unprepared, scared and I doubted my ability to produce work to the standard of the previous editorial team. But with the help of my team and a bunch of amazing contributors, low and behold we made our first issue and from there we went on to create a total of 10 magazines over two years. These two years have been an intense but incredible learning experience; I feel so fortunate to have had this job and I hope you all enjoy my last issue.

So, what’s in Volume 4 Edition 4?

In this edition, we have an eclectic mix of articles with a focus on current issues and topics that will keep you thinking long after you’re done reading. We also have a little summer zine, which you can cut out and enlist your inner origami master to construct it. This issue also has some incredible art including Dircksey’s first, satirical, fashion feature (if you want to stalk the hot models, their instas are on the credit page)! To top it all off we have our cutest cover yet, by Brianda Delgado which represents all of what Dircksey’s about, teamwork (with an Adventure Time flare).

changing its dark chocolate recipe. Third thank-you goes to Elisha, our Current Affairs Editor, for being the best grammar-nut ever; you have saved our writing too many times to count. Another thank-you belongs to Adam, our newbie editor who has more energy than Honey Boo Boo on her Go Go Juice; thanks for being refreshingly enthusiastic. Thank-you to Jesse for keeping me company at the lowly Mount Lawley campus, I’ll make sure to still come and pester you next year. Another thank-you goes to Shona for helping us with art since the beginning, your work is enthralling. And finally thank-you to all the contributors from the past two years who have shared their work with Dircksey, you are the heart and soul of this magazine and without you there would be no Dircksey.

If you would like to apply for the position of Editor-in-Chief head to www.dircksey.com or email editors@ecuguild.org.au for more information.

TTYL, Holly Ferguson Editor-in-Chief

Before I sign off I have a few people I want to thank.

First, I’d like to thank the 2016 Dircksey editor, Kitty Turpin (who has gone on to do some incredible things) for giving me this opportunity and believing that I could do the job.

Second, a big thank-you goes out to my day dot editors Tristan and Zach. You two have been with me since the start and I honestly couldn’t have done it without you; we will be forever bonded by the devastation of Coles

SUMMER ‘19 SAVE UP TO

WHAT’S ON // VOL 4: ED.4

WHAT’S ON: ON: WHAT’S MUSIC:

FILM

OTHER:

Childish Gambino November 8 HBF Stadium

A Star Is Born October 4 Drama, Romance

Don Giovanni October 20 – 27 His Majesty’s

The Wombats November 15 Red Hill Auditorium

Venom October 5 Thriller, Fantasy

Irish Day October 27 Ascot Racecourse

The Wiggles November 17 – November 18 Perth Arena

Bad Times at the El Royal October 12 Thriller, Mystery

The Colour Run November 4 Langley Park

Shania Twain November 30 Perth Arena

First Man October 12 Drama, History

BeerFest Fremantle November 9 – November 11 Esplanade Park

André Rieu November 24 Perth Arena

Bohemian Rhapsody November 2 Drama, Biography

twenty one pilots December 7 Perth Arena

The Grinch November 9 Christmas-Musical

Fabulous Times – The Cour ts Pride Parade.

November 24 The Court

Florence + the Machine January 12 Perth Arena

Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald November 16 Drama, Fantasy

Phil Collins January 28 – January 29 Perth Arena

Nutcracker and the Four Realms November 22 Fantasy Drama, Fantasy

Into The Woods November 28 – December 1 Studio Underground – State Theatre Centre of WA Kevin Hart – Irresponsible Tour December 3 Perth Arena Hopman Cup 2019 29 December – January 5 Perth Arena

What’s on at ECU: ECU Women In Business, End Of Year Cocktails and Celebrations October 18 Hyatt Regency Perth Frocktober Formal Friday October 26 ECU Joondalup ECU’s End of Semester Wine Tour November 4 Swan Valley ECU Student Guild Ball 2018 November 24 Crown Ballroom – Crown Perth DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4 9

PLAYLIST // VOL 4: ED.4

MILLENNIAL PINK PLAYLIST Does Your Mother Know - ABBA No More Tears Left To Cry – Ariana Grande Toxic – Brittany Spears Everytime We Touch – Cascada Finally – CeCe Peniston Car Wash (Shark Tale Mix) – Christina Aguilera & Missy Elliot Coming Out – Diana Ross Wuthering Heights – Kate Bush Bleeding Love – Leona Lewis Hot in Herre – Nelly Shut Up and Drive – Rihanna All Star – Smash Mouth Round Round – Sugababes Africa – Toto

By Tristan Sherlock

10 DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

ECU Student Guild

SECOND HAND BOOKSHOP

Guild Student Assist Officers can explain your rights and responsibilities as a student and help you navigate University policy.

They’ll help explain decisions made about your enrolment, academic progress or assessments. They’ll also advise you as to how best to resolve issues.

Joondalup Building 34.215 (Ngoolark) Mt Lawley Building 12 Bunbury Building 7.103A Mon - Fri: 8am – 4pm

DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4 11

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.2

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FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

#sponsored

By Grace Flynn Art by Shona Wong @somechuppy

Since launching in 2010, Instagram has gathered a following of over 800 million people across the globe and its become the go-to platform for advertising. It’s proving to be both cost-effective and successful in engaging consumers. Social media advertising is now an essential for businesses, both established and start-up.

This has seen the rise of the Instagram elite (think Zoe Sugg, Jay Alvarrez and Nash Grier) whose posts can have price tags upwards of $20,000. Their millions of followers earn them all-expenses-paid tropical holidays and free designer clothing.

These influencers (people who have access to a large audience and can persuade others by virtue of their authenticity and reach) have come to represent a small group of people who earn a living solely from posting online. With more and more businesses turning to social media to promote their brand image, the phenomenon of the influencer is becoming more widespread than we realise.

From the posters plastered across our Transperth buses to the unskippable ads that interrupt our YouTube videos, we’ve become somewhat immune to advertising messages.

Place a brand message in the hands of someone we know and trust, and we might just listen.

This increased emotional connection between consumer and sponsor (a brand supporting an influnecer) is what makes 64% of consumers more likely to trust brands that positively engage on social media.

Judging by the stats, businesses are starting to catch on. With a whopping 90% of big businesses

implementing social media strategies, it is evident that brands across a variety of industries are recognising the marketing power of social media.

With an increasing number of brands turning to sponsorships and brand ambassadors to peddle their products or services, you no longer need to have millions of followers to become an influencer.

Take Melanie Barlow for example, a 22-year-old Perth girl whose 24,500 followers on Instagram attracts 10 to 15 emails and DMs from clothing and beauty brands every month.

Collaborating with swimwear brands and clothing boutiques, she admits that receiving free products is definitely a perk of the part-time influencer gig, something that continues to attract more and more aspiring Insta-influencers.

Another Instagram user that has gained the attention of beauty brands is 17-year-old Ellie Chilvers. With just over 1000 followers, Ellie describes herself as “a very small fish in a huge ocean” when it comes to influencing. However, Ellie has strong views surrounding the integrity of those that are sponsored to promote products.

“For lots of influencers, whether its YouTube or Instagram, being paid to promote products is their job, and if they aren’t honest in what they like and don’t like, they are setting bad standards for other influencers and are being selfish and dishonest.”

they trust influencers less than they used to.

Consequently, many brands are narrowing their focus on ‘micro-influencers,’ who, despite having followers in the thousands rather than the millions, are able to establish a stronger sense of trust and authenticity with their followers or subscribers.

Responding to a shift towards social media marketing, ‘influencer agencies’ are emerging across Australia and creating networks of influencers and connecting them with brands, including The Influencer Agency (TIA) in Perth.

As the first of its kind in WA, the TIA has become host to a range of influencers since its establishment in October 2017, including radio host of 92.9, Heidi Anderson and Perth Wildcats basketball player, Damian Martin.

So, given that even Perth has jumped on the influencer bandwagon, social media has undoubtedly changed the marketing game.

With an influx of sponsored posts cramming our feeds, how long can the influence of influencers last?

Will we eventually become unmoved by our friends’ sponsored Insta posts and disengage from labels just like we would a regular ad on TV? It seems only time will tell... But, for now, enjoy the discount codes.

Recognition of this dishonesty, evident in the form of overly gushy and exaggerated product reviews, has seen millennials begin to distrust the big dogs in the influencing world.

In fact, 52% of millennials say DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4 13

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

Virtual Escape Becomes Reality

By Abigail Larocca Art by Shona Wong @somechuppy

I’m on the train. I look around and I can see two faces. Two older women engaging in a deep conversation about their grandchildren and exciting retirement plans. Everyone else is looking at their phones, tablets or laptops. The majority of them are zoned out with headphones on, immersed in their online world.

This is our escape from the real world. The millions of technological devices on offer allow users to connect to their perfectly tailored and personalised online spheres.

Current data suggests that Australians over 14 spend, on average, six hours per week on social media platforms.

Many of us use social media platforms such as Facebook, Instagram and Snapchat as a tool to manage our social networks, seamlessly engaging and building relationships without speaking a word.

Furthermore, to engage with our friends on a regular basis, all that is required is a quick comment, like or snap selfie. This is the ultimate in efficient friending. Would you even recognize half of the friends you have on Facebook in the real world?

The top eight social media platforms worldwide boast over 100 million users from all ages, ethnicities and geographic locations. As this trusted technology advances. So too does its integration into society and the variety of uses consumers have for it. In addition to 14 DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4

managing our social networks, we use social media to follow, buy, sell and create.

We find that social media is this safe place where we can promote the image we want. We can engage freely with things of interest without fear of judgement. We can create the life we want. The position and relationship we have with social media is worth investigating when reviewing virtual reality (VR) technology and exploring its relationship to the networking world. The 2018 film Ready Player One, explores the environment of a social network, ‘the OASIS,’ which offers a platform for users to make friends and engage in games. Users can earn online money to create a world which is better than the overpopulated, poor reality.

The ideas presented in Ready Player One are intriguing.

Could humanity revoke from the real world and choose to spend more time and energy in their virtual online worlds? While this concept sounds far-fetched, it’s a serious possibility.

Our generation is already being told it’s unlikely we will be able to afford to buy our own homes. We face the lowest job security in decades and with climate change threatening the environment we live in, it is easy to see that the Ready Player One lifestyle could become something we want and need. A virtual world where we can be who we want, and can achieve what is unachievable in the real world.

Therefore, the observation I made on the train last week is just the beginning of our retreat to our online presence.

Pisces: Will find it too hot

Aquarius: Summer festival hoe

Capricorn: Winter body realness

Sagittarius: Works all summer

Scorpio: Goes to the beach too much

Libra: Wears jeans in summer

Virgo: Gets Botox to stop sweating

Leo: Laughs as the world burns

Cancer: Will be sunburnt

summer suicide

Gemini: Already planning their

Will have one

Taurus: Doesn’t want a summer fling;

Thermal Water Bottle: To keep your water extra cold, even if you leave it in your hot car!

Frisbee: Easily transportable and a whole lotta fun! You can play this with any number of people or furry companions.

A keep cup for iced drinks: You’ve got your keep cup for hot drinks in winter, now you need your keep cup for iced drinks in winter! Do your part for the environment and look super cute while you’re at it.

Aloe vera gel: You’re bound to get sunburnt at some point, minimise your pain and slather on some aloe gel.

to happen

THIS BELONGS TO Mary, Queen of Scots January 17 Cinemas Grease - The Arena Experience January 19 Perth Arena Fringe World Festival January – February Various venues Faulty Towers, The Dining Experience November 24 Rigby’s bar

Mini portable fan: Yes, you’ll probably look like a tourist but at least you’ll be a less sweaty one.

Bring It All Back – S Club 7

Four Seasons – Vivaldi

Orinoco Flow- Enya

Barbie Girl – Aqua

Push the Button – Sugababes

California Gurls – Katy Perry

You Make Me Feel (Mighty Real) – Sylvester

Aries: Wants summer fling; not going

Kwinana Freeway Leederville IGA Bicton Pool Beach Perth Observatory Serpentine Falls Swan Valley Wildflower Trails Yelo For the milkshakes (and dogs)

Gelato 101 For the most delicious cold treats

Annalakshmi For the sunsets

Presotea For the most refreshing tea

Déjà vu For rooftop views

Little Creatures For the alcohol

Perth Upmarket November 25 Winthrop Hall

SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY BRANDED SEAT BELT BUCKLES BLISTERED PAVEMENT SPIDERS INSECT SPIDERS DRINK 40-DEGREE HEAT CRICKETS NASTY SWEAT PATCHES BLOW FLIES MOSQUITOES MOTHS IT’S SO HOT SCORCHING WATERMELONS WATER TIRED HUMIDITY WAVES SUNBURN ICED DRINKS CREAM GELATO SAND LIZARDS SNAKES BURNING HOLIDAYS SPRINKLER AEROGUARD CICADA SUMMER HOT SWEATY AUSTRALIAN SPF 50+ SUNSCREEN REIGNS SUPREME PUBLIC SWIMMING POOLS COTT. BEACH SCARBS ALOE VERA COCOA ABUNDANCE OF SEAGULLS BUTTER T-SHIRT TANS SUNGLASSES TANS SOCK TANS WATCH TANS MOUSTACHE TANS ZOOPER DOOPERS MONOPOLIES ICY POLE INDUSTRY

HOW TO MAKE AND USE YOUR SUMMER ZINE: 1. Cut the page out from Dircksey.

2. Fold the sheet in half, width-wise.

3. Fold the sheet in half again so it is divided into four sections.

4. Unfold the paper, place it in landscape, and fold the left edge to centre fold.

5. Do the same with the right side. Unfold it – you should have eight sections.

6. Fold the sheet again, width-wise.

7. Use scissors to cut through one panel from the outer folded edge.

8. Your zine is all ready for summer!

Made by Zachary Sheridan & Holly Ferguson

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

A Public (Transpor t) Pain in the Ass 18 DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4

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The Labor state government is moving full steam ahead with its fabled METRONET project, and Perth’s public transport landscape is set to change noticeably in the coming years.

I’m personally quite excited for developments on the railway side of things – Yanchep, Forrestfield and (maybe, finally) Ellenbrook all getting a line, and much more.

The Thornlie-Cockburn link is also the first step to our suburban railways resembling something that can be called a ‘network.’

However, the project outlines bus service improvements in its goals as well, which I agree is something that cannot be ignored.

Edith Cowan University’s two metro campuses are already well-supported by public transport. Mount Lawley has seven bus services, and Joondalup has five, (plus the CAT bus from Joondalup train station). In all honesty, we are quite fortunate to have so many options at our campuses.

However, the situation is not without its headscratchers.

For a time in 2017, while I was without a car, I dealt with an inconvenience that many eastern suburbs students and staff no doubt face.

ECU Mount Lawley’s closest railway station is Maylands, roughly two and a half kilometres away, but there is no direct public transport connection between the two.

Staff and students living in Perth’s east and along the Midland line have to take the train all the way into the city centre and then catch the 960/361/362 bus service to get back out to the Mount Lawley campus.

Combined with the wait at train stations and bus stops, this can add up to half an hour of journey time. For myself in Midvale, it nearly doubles the length of what is otherwise a square 30-minute commute by car on a busy morning - and for students and staff living further east, it is another burden on what is already a long journey.

The real kicker is this; thanks to the Transperth journey planner, I found that Maylands station to ECU Mount Lawley takes over half an hour via bus and train.

Google Maps and mental maths provided a shocking revelation: it takes the same amount of time - no, really, the same amount of time - to get off the train at Maylands and walk to the Mount Lawley campus.

When I had no car and was doing a film and video unit, I would take all the sitting-down time I could when travelling. Walking for half an hour straight is not an option for all of us, especially not when the hotter months come around.

Central Avenue is a wide and spacious route that almost forms a direct link between ECU and Maylands station, and in my opinion could easily accommodate buses with a stop or two along the way.

Such a service doesn’t need to be a dedicated shuttle to ECU, or even be a completely new service. Time, money and resources would be better spent making use of what we have.

One of the existing services operating out of the city along Alexander Drive may add a diversion, along Central Avenue via ECU, then onto Maylands and Meltham stations, then onto Grand Promenade to return to its regular route at Alexander Drive.

Thus, a great opportunity opens to serve ECU students and staff who rely on the Midland Line to get to the campus.

There will no doubt be dismissive responses to my complaints and suggestions, telling me to suck it up or manage my time better. But in response - perhaps a little pre-emptively, why shouldn’t we be looking at ways to streamline the way students get to university campuses, especially from the outer suburbs? Why shouldn’t we see obvious redundancies, and opportunities for improvements and point them out?

Connecting ECU Mount Lawley and Maylands station by bus would increase accessibility, and perhaps make commuting to university by public transport a more attractive option for those of us in the eastern metro area. With the busy lives we lead, 20 minutes shaved off a journey is never a bad thing - and a few extra spaces in the carpark would not go amiss.

By Rhys Gardiner Art by Neel Goodwin @Kloudkat

Obviously, some will see an opportunity to get some exercise in this. I certainly would, under most circumstances. But think of students who need to lug around gear for assignments away from the university.

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IN THE NUDE What you didn’t know about nudes The first nudes were statues

Man boobs

The Ancient Greeks loved to run around in the

It’s rumoured that the renaissance sculptor

nude all the time. And you know how art imitates

Michelangelo was a homosexual, which would

life? Well, a bunch of sculptors made some stat-

make sense, since he preferred to use male

ues (called ‘Kourous’) which “embodied Greek

models over female ones when making his work.

ideas of moral and physical beauty, nobility, and

This resulted in some… interesting anatomical

youth.” (For those of you wondering, yes, the

choices, with female bodies being painted in a

dicks on these statues were super small)

very masculine way. Often, they looked like men

Erotic imagery is older than Jesus So, they may have not been nudes but some of

with boobs!

Are facts, facts?

the first erotic imagery dates back to 30,000 B.C.

In an Internet-based survey, 53% of women

It seems our early ancestors loved decorating

aged between 18 and 34 claim to have received

their walls with paintings of various sexual acts.

nude photos from men, while only 22% of men

Pigeons are the real love birds In the 12th century people used carrier birds to send naughty notes! Slight catch though, it took 6 months to get your significant other’s response.

Way to dampen the mood.

Urban Dictionary has the vocab Back in 2005, a user called ‘madmaxxx’ posted on Urban Dictionary the definition of the word

have sent a dick-pic. Those few men are on a mission.

Jokes aside 24% of high school teens (aged 14 to 17) have participated in sending or receiving nudes, with 12% of teenage participation caused by peer-pressure.

Gay men are more truthful

‘nudes.’ Madmaxxx wrote; “Nude pics a chick

A survey found that 83% of gay men send dick-

posts of herself in a forum. Often times if a

pics on gay dating apps. But how many of them

hottie post a regular pic, the other poster will

are “STR8?”

keep asking for “nudes?” or “n00dz plz.” This shows that people have always been creepy AF on the internet.

Listicle by Holly Ferguson & Tristan Sherlock Art by Charlotte Scott @lotte.designs

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5 Things to Consider Before Buying a Pet So, you’ve decided that you want to surprise your loved one and buy them a pet for Christmas or a birthday. The real question here is: Did you consider what’s involved? Here are five things you should consider before buying a pet: 1. Pets aren’t toys.

Pets aren’t something that should not be bought on a whim, they need to be researched and prepared for. Here are a few questions you need to ask to make sure everyone is ready: Is the person mature enough to understand the responsibilities of owning a pet? Does their living situation accept pets? Do they have enough space to house the animal? Just because someone expresses an interest in having a pet doesn’t mean they are ready to own one (even a fish!).

2. Pets require daily care, just like us.

Whether you’re buying for your young children or partner, owning a pet is a family affair. Having a pet means daily feeding, picking up after those dreaded number twos and making sure they have enough stimulation so they don’t get bored (that’s when they destroy things). Completing these tasks as a family means you are giving your pet the ultimate loving home.

3. Pets have feelings too!

Pets love us unconditionally, but unfortunately, we don’t always give the same love back. As pet owners, it is our responsibility to train our pets and to show them how to behave so that we don’t have to constantly tell them off for doing the wrong thing. By spending time with our pets and training them, we create an everlasting bond.

4. Pets are for life, not just right now.

Before you run out and get yourself a furry companion, have you done all your research about them?

You’ll need to know how long they are estimated to live for, any special requirements the breed has, and how expensive the costs of owning a pet is. The important question you need to ask yourself is, am I ready for the responsibility of owning a pet or do I just like the idea?

5. Pet stores versus pet rescues.

There are so many places to buy pets nowadays, but which is the right one? Pet stores sometimes aren’t trustworthy due to puppy farming and the poor conditions animals are kept in. Backyard breeders are just trying to make a quick buck (and claiming their animals are pedigree). So, who can you trust?

Rescue groups are not-for-profit organisations dedicated to the welfare of animals big and small. By adopting a rescue animal, you not only give them a second chance at love, but the adoption fees go toward vital vet bills and the rescue becomes free to take in more animals.

Does someone in your family want a pet? Do you know when the right time to get a pet is?

Doing your research can be the difference between a beloved new family member or an abandoned pet. A great place to start your search for your new family member is petrescue.com.au.

The website is host to all sorts of animal rescues Australia wide.

By Jess Nieuwenhuis Art by Zoe Wolski @zoewolski

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FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

A Man’s Coast is his C astle Insight: The Curious Incident

of the Dog in the Night-Time

By Elisha Hammond Image by Jesse Newell @newellcreative

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FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4 14 hours north of Perth, there’s a tiny, secluded paradise.

It doesn’t look like much from the outside, a good hour’s drive from the main road, over a bumpy gravel track dotted with termite mounds. But once you see the terrific blue of the Ningaloo coastline, the long journey is worth it.

Tucked away in the peeling laundry-blue paint of their well-worn homestead, listening to the chirping of half a dozen resident swallows, are caretakers Phil and Jane. They’re the pastoralists up at Ningaloo Station - the proud protectors of 48,000 hectares of pristine West Aussie land.

Jane’s family has taken care of Ningaloo Station since 1949. She grew up watching her father and grandfather manage the homestead.

She and her partner Phil have been looking after families camping at the station for decades.

But the last 20 years haven’t been smooth sailing for the proud regional custodians, and they’re now engaged in a David and Goliath battle over the right to own and operate their station.

Back in 1933, pastoralists in WA signed the Land Act, an agreement to manage their property outside of the Crown. But in 1997, the Government came knocking. They realised landowners were making money using their land to host livestock and wilderness campers, and they wanted a slice of the pie.

The Government put forward a proposal: they wanted a large chunk of the land owned by six station managers along the Ningaloo Coast to put together a conservation reserve. And the 48% they want to take from Phil and Jane? It includes their home, campsites, the main coastal strip and all their equipment.

“We just want to be able to derive an income so we can afford to stay in our house, nothing more than the average person … we’re left with some spinifex and fencing; everything we own is along the coast,” Jane recounts sadly.

The troubled landowners were

given three options; comply with the Government, negotiate the deal, or forfeit the whole lease in 2015. And if negotiations don’t result in a compromise for both parties, then the land defaults to the Crown. Naturally, Phil pleaded his case, looking for any and all options to keep the property.

“You’ve got a gun at your head really. You agree to what they want or you forfeit your whole lease,” Phil says. “We put everything we could to them - 32 options. But it’s the same response we got in 2004: No. They don’t have to give a reason for their answer.”

“To take something off someone and not enter into true and genuine consultation is a travesty.”

Fast forward to 2018, and Phil and Jane still haven’t signed the amended Land Act. They’re in the middle of a Supreme Court case with the State Government, awaiting a decision on whether their land is still protected under the original law.

it’s one of the most popular locations along the coast. The next four years at the site are almost completely booked out, and half the campers have sworn never to return to the campsite on principle if the Supreme Count decision is unfavourable. There’s a very strong sense of community along the Ningaloo shores.

“The coast is a great equaliser,” Jane says. “We’re all the same out here.”

“The people who come over are so considerate and respectful,” Phil adds. “They’re the sort of people you love having on your property, because you know damn well they’re gonna look after it.”

And while Phil and Jane look after the families that choose to holiday at the coast they care for so carefully year after year, the question must be asked: Who’s looking out for them?

The Government has talked about excising the land for conservation reasons, keeping the coast clean for future generations. But according to Phil, they’re also planning to invest in expensive eco tourism that will put an end to wilderness camping.

Other parts of excised land are being claimed under the broad umbrella of public purpose, simply put, it’ll become land the government can do whatever it pleases with.

Think this sounds like The Castle?

You’re not the only one.

You’d think over twenty years of back and forth with the Government would have resulted in someone sticking up for Phil and Jane. In 2005, Colin Barnett and Brendon Grylls signed an agreement saying they would stop the intrusion on pastoralist land if they won the election. “There will be no excision of pastoral leases to add to the Ningaloo Marine Park,” the agreement states. But when the Coalition got into power, not a finger was lifted off the Ningaloo coast to help landowners.

Over 500 campers visit Ningaloo station during the peak season, and DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4 25

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

CAN’T GET NO EDUCATION PHOTOGR APHY

MARSHALL

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S TAY

|

ST YLING

H O L LY

FERGUSON

Top Left: Lawrence wears ECU Men’s Roo Hoodie in Grey $59.95, Top Centre: Finn wears ECU Women’s Roo Hoodie in Navy $59.95 & ECU Cap in Navy $19.95, Top Right: Courtney wears ECU Varsity Tee in Green $5.00, Bottom Left: Jarryd wears ECU Men’s Varsity tee in Navy $5.00 & ECU Duffle Bag in Blue $29.95, Bottom Right: Jen wears ECU Women’s Varsity Tee in Grey $5.00 & ECU Cap in Navy $19.95

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Lawrence wears ECU Men’s Roo Hoodie in Grey $59.95

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Top Left: Courtney wears ECU Varsity Tee in Green $5.00, Top Centre: Jarryd wears ECU Men’s Varsity tee in Navy $5.00 & ECU Cap in Navy $5.00, Top Right: Lawrence wears ECU Men’s Roo Hoodie in Grey $59.95, Bottom Left: Finn wears ECU Women’s Roo Hoodie in Navy $59.95, Bottom Right: Jen wears ECU Women’s Varsity Tee in Grey $5.00

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Left: Courtney wears ECU Varsity Tee in Green $5.00, Right: Lawrence wears ECU Men’s Roo Hoodie in Grey $59.95

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

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BINGO

Things you hear at ECU

I auditioned for WAAPA.

What’s the guild?

My coffee’s burnt.

I can’t find parking.

We have a third campus?

Yeet!

I didn’t even need that text book.

Super TAFE.

How do I reference this?

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

ON TR ACK WITH: MADISON DE ROZARIO

By Vanessa Vlajkovic Image from: Griffith Sports College

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P

erth-born Paralympic Games champion Madison de Rozario is just 24 years old. Don’t let her youth confuse you, she’s lived more than most people her age manage to do in two lifetimes.

Before she started training for the Paralympics, Madison was involved with a very different kind of sport.

She started training in ballet when she was just four years old and was constantly dancing. But right before a concert, she got a bad case of the flu.

Madison’s cells started fighting the disease, but even after she got better, her body began attacking itself. The cells targeted the fluid around her spinal cord, and days later she was declared paraplegic.

But life in a wheelchair has been anything but ordinary, giving Madison the opportunity to go for gold at the Paralympic games since 2008. The Sydney resident had her first taste of the competitive sport when she was just 14, flying to Beijing and bringing back a silver medal in wheelchair racing. De Rozario developed the upper body strength and speed necessary for competing internationally in just 24 short months and now has her eye on a spot in the 2020 Tokyo Games.

I chatted to Madison about her past experiences, present training and future goals. Here’s what she had to say.

How did you get involved with the Paralympics?

I got involved with athletics when I was 12. It was just a matter of trying all kinds of sports until I found one that I really clicked with. I was training with the goal of heading to London in 2012 when I was selected for the team heading to Beijing in 2008 as a part of the 4x100m relay team. It was a massive surprise.

How does it feel to be on the world stage all the time, be so wellknown? Is it overwhelming? Do you love it?

It is absolutely overwhelming. I don’t love being well-known, I like to keep my head down and train, but I do love that it has given me a platform that I can use to influence change.

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4 Who’s your biggest inspiration/ role model?

Definitely my coach, Louise Sauvage.

What’s the worst question a journalist has asked you?

Journalists who ask to do a piece on me as an athlete and end up making it a narrative around overcoming disability are the worst. I have no issue speaking about disability, but I need it to be on my terms.

Are you living your dream career? Do you see yourself keeping at it well into the future?

I am living my dream! I get to push myself to my absolute limit every day and it’s amazing. I see myself involved in athletics for as long as it’s allowing me to grow and become a person that I am proud to be.

When you’re not competing or training, what do you enjoy doing?

I don’t have a lot of downtime at the moment, I’m also trying to complete my business degree as well as a number of other commitments. But my downtime is spent with my dog!

What’s your favourite part of what you do?

The way my sport allows me to push myself and see how far I can go.

Not just physically but mentally.

And your least favourite part?

I hate how black and white those final results are.

Finally, any words of wisdom for the public and the disability community?

To the disability community - use your voice. Take back the narrative and claim your own story. Tell your story how you want it to be told.

Know how you want to be treated, spoken to and thought of - and don’t settle for anything less than what you deserve. To the general public - your role here is to listen. Listen and ask questions. Don’t assume to know things but also don’t be afraid to ask.

Be a good ally.

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Mirror Mirror…

The past few decades have seen an increase in the greater number of people medically altering and enhancing their looks through fillers such as Botox to more elaborate surgical procedures like body implants.

Last August a Four Corners documentary detailed several aspects of this current trend. Amongst other things, it showed an 18-year-old who regularly does podcasts on what fillers she will have next.

Once upon a time, cosmetic procedures were the territory of the rich and famous as they approached middle age; nowadays they are undertaken by a broader cross section of the community and by progressively younger individuals.

On top of the potential risks, such procedures do not produce permanent results. Botox or any other filler is a temporary fix lasting about three months or so.

Furthermore, these fillers do not stop the actual aging process: the lines they fill will continue to deepen and expand as the years pass.

A few hard facts might help reassure those of us who feel left behind in this cosmetic rush.

Hence, bigger doses of Botox will be required as life goes on. Fillers merely disguise the signs of aging temporarily. A beautician once told me about the procedures offered at her salon, confirming that none of them were permanent.

Any surgery involves risks, and the more invasive the surgery, the greater the risk. However, some fillers such as Botox are far less invasive and pose less risk, assuming they are administered correctly by trained professionals.

For those who want to avoid this bandwagon, there are cheaper and safer alternatives to cosmetic intervention. Good preventative measures and lifestyle factors such as exercise and a good diet with simple reductions in sugar and fats.

But some procedures, (even fillers) can lead to drastic and unexpected results (for example, the documentary stated how a woman had lost sight in one eye as a result of fillers being incorrectly inserted into her cheeks).

Another important factor with our climate is to avoid prolonged exposure to the sun. Excessive exposure to its ultraviolet rays leads to premature ageing of the skin. In addition, there are exercises that can assist: just as we exercise the muscles of the body,

so too the muscles of the face can be toned (there are plenty of resources on the Internet).

Aging is merely the outward manifestation of a more general process that every physical entity, whether organic or inorganic, undergoes at differing rates. The chemical elements that comprise the cells and tissues of the human body eventually unravel and break down. This decay—or entropy, to give it its fancy scientific name—is a law of the universe.

No one likes the physical aspects of ageing. Unfortunately, there is no ‘cure’ for it, no fountain of eternal youth (unless you’re Doctor Who!).

The longer you live, the more you will age; how much it will show on your face depends largely on your genetics and your lifestyle. Take care of yourself, don’t overdo it and the process will slow down, at least a little.

By Andrew Douglas Art by Claire Solano @chlorofluoro_artist

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WHAT’S FOR DINNER? Welcome back to our favourite regular segment, where our contributors scope out Perth’s most interesting restaurants, stuff their faces and call it ‘serious research.’ We’re back with some quirky haunts that are perfect for a first date, Sunday brunch or afternoon delight. Bon Appetit!

By Rhys Gardiner and Elisha Hammond

A RESTAURANT FOR WHEN YOU’RE ROLLING IN CASH AFTER PAYDAY AND WANT TO TREAT YO’ SELF Bistro Guillaume 63 Bolton Avenue, Burswood If there’s one place where you’re pardoned for, it’s spending your entire paycheck on food, then it’s Bistro Guillaume. This ultra-chic, French restaurant will have your mouth watering with its fantastic dinner and dessert menu (P.S. - the mashed potatoes are to DIE for). You’re guaranteed to charm the pants off the lucky person who dines with you. The night is best served with a glass of their most affordable champagne and a big portion of their famous tarragon chicken for you and your guest to share. Your bank account will probably regret it, but you certainly won’t. Situated just a hop, skip and a jump away from the casino, it’s the perfect opportunity to wine and dine in style for a night before blowing whatever leftover cash you’ve got on the roulette tables.

A RESTAUR ANT WITH MT LAWLEY HEART Crooked Spire 71 Victoria St, Midland Crooked Spire is located a stone’s throw away from the train station, and gives a lively kick to groggy and troubled Midland.

The atmosphere is open, warm and inviting.

A concrete floor space houses comfortable old couches, a stage for live acts, and merchandise racks selling subversive greeting cards. The coffee blend is excellent for those who enjoy a mellower brew – creamy and nutty, with a chocolate undercurrent.

For the hungry, Crooked Spire offers a variety of snacks, sweets and brunch items.

From quirky cakes to paninis and salads, all the way to made-to-order cooked meals – the majority with gluten-free or vegan options. There is something for everyone.

With my “B.A.E. Bagel” costing $13.45, the prices are a bit dear, but I can forgive that for the smile I wear every time I walk out feeling refreshed and happy. Midland has needed a place like this for years.

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SCATTERBRAINED CHARM Taylor’s Café 510 Great Northern Hwy, Middle Swan This art and coffee house has recently emerged as one of Swan Valley’s foremost establishments. Taylor’s is nestled in a shady patch of greenery. The corrugated iron café building gives way to a large outdoor garden, perfect for spring weekend jaunts. The interior is eclectic – mix and match furniture, art hanging all over the place, and kangaroo paw wallpaper. An old rainwater tank is used as an enclosure for one of the tables. It’s easy to tell that Taylor’s is a place run by, and for artists. But it’s a café first and foremost, so how does it compare to other cafés around Perth?

Very well, I am happy to report. As I sat down with my coffee, I saw food coming out of the kitchen that made me wish I had skipped breakfast. Golden frittatas, hearty salads, bacon and eggs, a pumpkin sandwich, and cakes and confections made with care; many of which are vegan, and sugar or gluten free if you so desire. Well-placed at the southern entrance to the region, Taylor’s is a great introduction to the sights, sounds and tastes of the Swan Valley.

A RESTAURANT WITH THAT GORGEOUS RETRO FEEL The Moon, Northbridge 2/323 William Street, Northbridge As a uni student, I live for happy hour at The Moon. I’m always here for six-dollar-drinks and fry buckets on an off day. I’m convinced that it’s one of the only places in Northbridge that still has a little bit of magic. The service is always amazing, the waitstaff are super friendly and your food is nearly always brought out two minutes after you’ve placed your order - I’m not joking, they’re that good.

They’ve also got a solid range of vegan options and an awesome drinks menu (two words: Boozy. Milkshakes.). With plenty of themed nights and playful 50s-style greasy spoon charm, The Moon will soon become your favourite hangout on any day of the week.

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BREAKFAST RECIPES Microwaved Poached Eggs You will need: • 2 eggs • Water • 1 tsp salt • 2 ramekins or small bowls or coffee cups Instructions: 1. Into each ramekin, add ½ cup of water and ½ tsp of salt. Crack one egg into each ramekin.

2. Place each ramekin into the microwave. The cooking time will depend on the microwave, your vessel and how well-done you want your egg to be. Start by cooking them for 1 minute and cook longer if need be.

3. Once the egg is cooked to the desired consistency, let it sit in the water for another minute or two. This will gently finish cooking the whites without hardening the yolk.

4. Once your eggs are cooked, carefully spoon them out and serve on top of the breakfast of your choice.

Diablo Eggs & Toast You will need: • 2 slices of bread • Butter • Two poached eggs • Tabasco sauce • Chives Instructions: 1. Take your favorite bread and spread butter on both sides. Heat a pan on medium heat and grill the bread on both sides until lightly browned.

2. Top each of the slices of toast with the previously poached eggs.

3. Whilst the eggs are still hot, put a pat of butter on top of each egg and drizzle the Tabasco to your liking.

4. Finally, top the toast with chopped chives.

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Çilbir You will need: • • • • • • • •

Olive oil 2 slices of bread 2 Tbsp butter Two poached eggs ½ cup greek yogurt 1 garlic clove (chopped) ½ tsp chilli flakes 1 tsp paprika

Instructions:

Harvest Hash You will need: • ½ onion • 1 potato or sweet potato (cut into cubes) • Vegetables of choice* • Olive oil • Two poached eggs • Lemon Instructions:

1. Drizzle the olive oil on your bread slices and spread it using your fingertips. Heat a pan on medium to high heat and grill the bread on both sides until golden brown and crunchy. Set the toast aside.

2. Add the yogurt to your serving dish and mix in the chopped garlic clove.

3. After poaching your eggs place them on top of the yogurt.

4. Heat up a small pot or pan on medium low heat and melt the butter. When the butter begins bubbling, sprinkle in chili flakes and paprika.

5. Pour chili butter on top of the eggs. Serve with the grilled bread.

1. Chop all the vegetables and have them ready to use.

2. Microwave the cubed potato for 3 minutes or until tender.

3. Heat a pan on medium heat and drizzle a bit of olive oil. When the oil starts to simmer add the sliced onions. Cook until the onions are slightly transparent.

4. Add the potato and the rest of the vegetables, then continue to sauté until tender. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

5. Plate the sautéed vegetables and top with your two poached eggs. Garnish with a lemon wedge. *Use whatever vegetables you have on hand.

This recipe is all about customization! My favorite combination is sweet potato, brussels sprouts and cherry tomatoes.

By Marcos Chavez Art by Marcos Chavez @marcoschavez43

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Artist Feature: Darren Stapley

Bachelor of Contemporary Art | Majoring in Photomedia Major and minoring in Graphic Design

Tell us about your first experience with photography/when did you discover it?

I spent a summer in New York City in 2014 and went to a small art gallery in an old police precinct in midtown Manhattan.

I met a man named Jesper Heynes who was doing an installation there. Jesper had spent the last 30 years in New York photographing his life and his friends around him and I found a similarity in his photos to the pictures I was taking at the time.

I was shooting black and white film in New York and Jesper was the first person to make me realise that my photos were both a documentation of my life but also an artistic expression.

What led you to want to study it at university and why did you pick ECU? When I got back from New York I kept shooting film. I kept documenting whatever was going on around me. Then I started getting asked to do photoshoots for people I knew around town so I thought I may leave my career at the time and pursue photography as a new career option. I chose ECU because of the facilities and the famous photographers who have graduated from the institution.

It came with challenges but overall it was a incredibly rewarding experience to work with different scholars and different students. There have not been many struggles… Possibly keeping a portion of my weekly wage aside to buy and develop film.

Where do you draw inspiration from with your work?

The majority of my work is inspired by my experiences and the relationships I keep with people and places around me.

I mostly take photos of people I know, and I can trace every photo back to a moment I spent with either a person or a place.

I’m also heavily inspired by music and film if you haven’t seen Lost in Translation – watch it!

What’s next for you?

Later this year I’ll be graduating from ECU. I hope to do my own solo show some time in the near future and I hope to get consistent work in the area of fashion photography.

I have been slowly building a portfolio of both art and editorial style photos, and I hope to keep developing my skills in those areas.

Find Darren Here: www.darrenstapley.com

What have been some of the triumphs and struggles you’ve experienced at uni?

A recent triumph would be the year I spent in the USA at Western Washington University.

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Bread in Common

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

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FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

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FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

Top 5 mythical places that could be real...

When listening to bedtime stories and dreaming of being transported away to a new world, stories of mythical lands trump all. These stories may seem bizarre and beyond belief but some of these could be taken as truth, or simply as legend. Centuries of these tales fill our society. Strap yourself in for an impossible journey to a faraway land.

5. Dwarka – Underwater City, India “I’d like to be under the sea, in an octopus’ garden in the shade.” If this song were applicable to any city, it would probably be the (potentially) mythical city of Dwarka. Submerged underwater, Dwarka is considered in Hinduism as one of the four Dhamas (a place where people would seek out a holy pilgrimage). According to legend, the city was attacked and destroyed by a mythical flying machine that was equipped with laser weapons. Recently, what are thought to be the ruins of the “city” have been found submerged underwater. Historians are currently researching if the city actually existed and are trying to place a date on how long the civilisation existed for.

4. Scolomance – Magic school run by the devil, Transylvania This place is 100% more wicked (and selective) than Hogwarts. Scolomance is one hell of an academy with their head academic, the devil, teaching approximately 7-13 students in the mystical arts. It is believed that their curriculum includes weather control, advanced magic and how to train your dragon. The school’s final exam requires students to write a dissertation on everything they have learned in their nine years of study. Rumour has it that the top student is chosen to be the weather-master who rides a dragon; which God subsequently stops from plummeting into the earth and devouring us.

3. Shangri-La – Mythical Valley, Himalayan Mountains Shangri-La (not to be confused with the 5-star resort chain) is fabled as an Asian paradise, permanently existing in a harmonious state. Although it has been described in many poetic texts, the paradise has only emerged into pop culture recently. With the land releasing natural healing and immortality properties, it’s the place to be.

2. Yomi – Land of the dead in Shinto religion, not in this world Yomi is not heaven or hell, it acts as a place of existence after death and mirrors our world. Unlike other religions, the place is accepting of all non-living beings. Here, no one is praised or condemned for their past actions. Initially, the land was ruled by Izanami, who was one of the mythical creators of Japan but he was eventually replaced by Susanoo. If you end up here, at least you’ll be able to have fat chats with your mates.

1. Asgard – One of the nine-realms in Norse mythology, somewhere very far away Asgard is home of the Æsir gods, most importantly Thor. Chris Hemsworth in your world? What more can you want?

Flowing wine, meat off the bone, and a machine called the Bifröst that transports you anywhere in the nine realms faster than Transperth ever will. The land is said to be destroyed in the “future” due to the events of Ragnarök; so if somehow you end up there, make sure it’s when it still exists.

By Adam Di Tuillo

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FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

Spotlight on Modern Slavery

Modern slavery is a thing, and it’s so prominent that the Turnbull government introduced a Modern Slavery Act earlier this year to keep big companies accountable.

Even though slavery was banned decades ago, modern slavery is far from a thing of the past. In a nutshell, any practice that involves extreme labour rights abuses comes under the umbrella of modern slavery. This includes human trafficking, a deplorable practice where migrants from foreign countries are often hit hardest.

Some of the biggest sectors adopting modern slavery practices include the cocoa and palm oil industries and seafood farming plants. Simply put, much of what we eat, drink, smoke, apply to our faces, and communicate, with have some ties to modern slavery.

So what will the Modern Slavery Act do to stop this?

Basically, any company in Australia

turning over 100 million dollars in revenue will have to put together an end of year report that demonstrates their workplace is fighting against modern slavery practices.

This will apply to some really big corporations (hospitals, universities, churches, government departments, and tech giants). Roughly 3000 business will need to present a report like this in Australia, and it has to be published less than six months after their annual business report is filed.

An act like this couldn’t come at a more important time. It shows Australia following in the footsteps of the United Kingdom, who introduced their own Modern Slavery legislation back in 2015. Some politicians have even marketed the bill as a way for Australia to ‘race to the top’ and

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become a world leader in abolishing modern slavery practices.

But most importantly, meaningful action to abolish modern slavery is important in sending a message to other countries. It’s particularly poignant for the Democratic Republic of Congo, the country responsible for producing half of the world’s cobalt supply.

Cobalt is becoming increasingly important as a resource that stabilises the battery life of handheld electronics such as smartphones and tablets. Most cobalt supplies come from artisanal mines in the Congo, where modern slavery is at its worst.

Children as young as seven are forced to mine cobalt, working 12 hours a day with no protective clothing.

Many have developed major health

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

Photo: The Carter Center/ G. Dubourthoumieu

problems as a result.

A 2012 report from UNICEF estimated that 40 000 children were working in cobalt mines, and as demand for the resource has doubled over the last six years, it is terrifying to think of how many young people may be working there now.

So a report is a great start to help corporations become more accountable, but there’s something missing from the new Australian law.

Companies have to file their reports, but there’s no infringement for not complying with the act. A business can stand back and choose not to report on slavery risks in their company and they wont face any penalty; in other words, the legislation is missing an enforceability factor that is paramount in making sure modern slavery practices are abolished once and for all.

While the act may seek to change

the culture and awareness of modern slavery practices in a first world country like Australia, the lack of infringement causes serious concerns around its true merit.

“A business can stand back and choose not to report on slavery risks in their company and they wont face any penalty.”

Educate yourself about where our products come from, from cosmetics to food, clothing to surf wear.

And if you’re interested in finding out how your own consumerism supports modern slavery, you can google Slavery Footprint and take their quiz to find out how many slaves your lifestyle supports. You’ll be surprised with the result.

Becoming more aware of the damaging effects of modern slavery, both in large corporations and our own lives, brings us one step closer to solving the global issue once and for all.

By Elisha Hammond

But while the legislation targets large companies, what can we do to reduce our own inadvertent support of modern slavery?

We can start by increasing awareness of our consumerism practices.

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WHAT YOU SHOULD // VOL 4: ED.4

What You Should:

What You Should Watch: What You Should Watch: Kidding Who Is America?

Jim Carrey stars in Kidding as Jeff Pickles, a children’s entertainer.

Think of a disenfranchised, aged Play School presenter and you have Mr. Pickles.

There is something incredibly precarious about the narrative. The character of Jeff is very much in survival mode. He goes through the motions on auto-pilot whilst internally crashing repeatedly.

His smile is fake, although he desperately wants it to be real, his hair is a perfect brown bob and his clothes are pressed and neat as a pin. At any given moment, you feel as though Jeff is going to teeter off the edge of sanity. As a matter of fact, the first episode demonstrates the theme of losing control impeccably. Jeff has lost one of his twin boys, his marriage, and creative control. He is expected to sing happy songs, frolic with puppets and live in a pastel world of ‘happy.’ All the while he is crumbling on the inside. At one point Jeff channels Britney Spears,

circa 2007, as he stares into his bathroom mirror, armed with an electric razor.

Kidding places children in adult situations.

These include witnessing death, adultery, and casual drug use. Kidding has a very Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind feel to it—incidentally, it’s also directed by Michel Gondry, so it is the second-time Carrey and Gondry have paired up to create something unusual that pushes Carrey’s acting abilities to new heights. Jeff Pickles seems to be trying to reassure himself as well as the children he is trying to entertain. He smiles, but there is an undeniable sadness present in his eyes.

Kidding makes you feel as though you might cry and yet want to burst out in an uncomfortable laughter.

The show can be streamed on Stan.

By Marley Amphlett

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A far-right conspiracy theorist, a far-left lecturer, a British ex-convict, an Israeli anti-terrorism expert, an Italian playboy and a Finnish YouTuber. What do they have in common? They are all portrayed by the master of disguise Sacha Baron Cohen, in his latest series.

Who is America? is a political satire with the goal of examining and critiquing the various ideologies across the United States.

Going incognito as a range of characters, Cohen interviews some of the key voices in America’s political discourse. Some of his interviews are unsuccessful but some have resulted in the resignations of senators and lawsuits against Cohen. And this is due to the fact that Cohen carefully manipulates his targets into revealing their true intentions.

He confront s these people and tells them exactly what they want to hear, so they feel more comfortable to open up

on camera. In the first episode he manages to get video recordings of a group of political figures openly advocating for children as young as 3 to bear arms. It’s scary to think that many of these people hold great positions of power.

His humour is crude, and his methods are questionable, but there’s no denying Cohen’s brilliance. He has truly mastered the art of political satire.

All episodes can be found exclusively on Stan.

By Jesse Newell

WHAT YOU SHOULD // VOL 4: ED.4

What You Should Watch: American Vandal Graffiti dicks. Stupid Americans Teens. A high school mockumentary.

Look, this is a stupid show. Like so dumb. But I love it!

American Vandal follows Dylan Maxwell, the subject of a high school documentary, after he is ‘falsely accused’ of spray painting dicks onto 27 cars in the teachers’ parking lot. Despite the satirical premise, the mystery is compelling. American Vandal relies on stupid conspiracy theories, and while it can appear tiring and repetitive, it makes for entertaining viewing. Peter and Sam, the brains behind the documentary are overly dramatic and they perfectly imitate serious documentary directors. While I am yet to watch the second season, I can say that season one is worth the watch. The only issue is, it’s very clear that character inspirations for American Vandal comes from Australia’s very own TV Icon, Jonah Takalua, and his clique from Summer Heights High. As stupid as it is, this show will forever be one of the funniest things on Netflix (as far as I remember). Except for Titus Andromedon’s parody of Beyoncé’s Lemonade from The Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt.

By Tristan Sherlock

What You Should Listen To: The Spotlight with Holly and Adam I’m not biased, but The Spotlight with Holly and Adam is my new favourite radio show. Broadcasting from ECU Mount Lawley, every Friday from 10am to 12pm, The Spotlight goes where no radio show has gone before.

From interviews with stage mums to chats with terrorism researchers, each week the show explores interesting people, topics and places. The hosts, Holly and Adam, have great banter and will have you laughing both with and at them. The show also has banging bops, great debates and giveaways; what more could you ask for? To listen live head to www.iradeo.com/station/154502 and to catch up or restream head to Dircksey’s soundcloud.

By Holly Ferguson

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MUSIC // VOL 4: ED.4

J . F. K Celebrating their brand-new track ‘Roll With It,’ Perth rockers J.F.K are fresh from their Melbourne tour and getting ready to play their second Western Australian Music Awards.

Last year’s WAM winners for Rock Song of the Year with ‘A Boy and A Boy’ were jamming pretty hard in an Osborne Park studio, but they decided to take some time out to chat about their nerves on that night, marriage equality, and the single ‘Forget About It.’ The video clip for ‘Forget About It’ is a Strokes-esque, mid-nineties, guitar thrashing blend of charisma which engages the viewer and asks – ‘what do you want to do?’

Lead singer James said it was born out of a toxic situation. “I was in a relationship, which was going through some tough times … [There were] arguments based around a lack of communication … I like to think about ‘Forget About It’ as an argument.”

“One night in particular, he wanted to go dancing after a gig. I was cool with it, but I wanted to get changed. So, 48 DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4

as we were driving home he said, ‘Oh no we’ll just stay in.’

I asked if he was sure, but he said it was fine.”

“The next day, he was furious and said we never did anything he wanted to do … That relationship didn’t last.”

The track was written in one of their ritual Monday marathon jam sessions at The Hen House studios, where they like to rehearse from 6pm to past midnight.

The energetic young band hope to emulate the sound of The Hives, Queens of the Stone Age and Arctic Monkeys. Lead guitarist Alex said that the band was always experimenting in these intense sessions. “We like having something really fresh when we go into the studio. With ‘Forget About It,’ James had the lyrics but we needed to play around with the chords and it became really riffy.”

With a recent tour to Melbourne under their belt, J.F.K are positive and ambitious about where things could go.

“We’ve played all different types of shows now. The sky is the limit.”

MUSIC // VOL 4: ED.4

“We love those intimate gigs because with a smaller crowd you can really see the people in front of you. It’s important because energy and being a live entity is essential to us and it’s nice to see we can bring that and have fun with the crowd regardless of the venue.”

‘A Boy and A Boy’ has truly inspiring lyrics, which directly speak of the experiences that young gay men have with societal prejudice. James said that he wrote the song after seeing the “disgusting anti-gay-marriage adds that ran before the plebiscite last year.”

“The song is about how I was having dinner with my boyfriend at the time and a mother and daughter just kept staring at us. At first I thought that I looked horrible, because I’m typically a gross eater, but then I realised it was because we were holding hands … When we play that song, I talk about my experiences with discrimination and you can see some people who are against that issue stop

moving. There have been times when audience members actually walked to the back of the venue.”

Although the stigma was still there, J.F.K never thought they would win an award for the political hit ‘A Boy and A Boy.’ They just wanted to make a statement.

“I still don’t really believe it, I’ve got the plaque sitting in my room and it’s weird, but inspiring,” James said.

You can find J.F.K’s tunes on Spotify and Apple Music.

Keep your ears out for more releases and a longer project dropping in early 2019.

Interview and Image by Jackson Lavell-Lee

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DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.3 49

MUSIC // VOL 4: ED.4

H YCL A SS

IS REAL PERTH HIP-HOP 50 DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4

F

resh from her bangin’ set at Listen Out; alongside rap icons such as Skepta, A$AP Rocky and Brockhampton, Hyclass is keeping it real at Ezra Pound in Northbridge. The Maori/ Samoan rapper talks about being proud of your culture and her new single ‘Queen.’

‘Queen’ celebrates diverse colours and backgrounds, something that the Australian scene has not always been comfortable with. “It’s not only from my point of view but also from others who, feel the same way. Embracing our heritage and our culture, whatever background that is, is truly important.”

“I had a vision of what the song was going to be like and I knew my family were going to be in it. For my young nieces and nephews, it’s important for them to see that and be proud of who we are,” she said.

The video clip doesn’t reference staged theatrics, fast cars or bling. Instead, the video features her closest support network, which reflects the themes of the track.

“I think hip-hop comes from a very personal place. Being original and authentic is essential, I try to celebrate that in ‘Queen’ by saying; everything we are, everything we see, represents us and comes through in our art.” she said.

One of the most popular songs performed by Hyclass is ‘Who’, which has a rugged soulful feel that you just can’t help but dance to.

Earlier this year at Fairbridge festival she had a legion of teenagers and middle-aged hip-hop heads alike breaking it down in the rain.

“When we first wrote it, we were having one of those nights. I was in the studio with my cousin, Rae, and he had a beat. We’d had a few drinks and he started humming this chorus and I was like, “Wow! What is that?”

“We were having fun with ‘who want it, who want it, who want it like this, who want it like that?’ It’s got a real hype delivery and it’s dope to play live.”

It hasn’t always been easy for

MUSIC // VOL 4: ED.4 Hyclass though, the struggle to juggle tricky work schedules with writing music and performing was tough originally, but she’s always had help to keep music as her focus.

“You have to be good, right? I guess I had a lot of support when I was starting because Rae had been in the scene and still DJs for me.”

“I did a bit of battle rapping and a lot of people were kind of surprised, I guess. A guy once said to me after a show that he thought I looked like one of the Mums that picks up kids from school but then when I started to rap he was amazed,” she said.

Her RTRFM DJ personality came out to talk about the next generation of young women who are taking on ‘the boys’ in the Perth hip-hop scene.

“I’m really digging this young indigenous girl called Shenae, she’s super lyrical with a strong flow. Although she’s more soul reggae, I want to shout-out Jamila as well. Her single is coming soon, she’s amazing.”

It wasn’t always hip-hop though; her musical confidence grew from an unlikely beginning.

“I started off DJing and I love drum and bass, house, and EDM. The first time I rapped was over the top of drum and bass at a party, grime style.

I was asked to do that at a club and that was my first ever gig,” she said.

The launch of ‘Queen’ was a double per for mance, one private video session at Rada Studios and another at Mojos with the brass jazz band, Premise.

“It was a really great show, we wanted to keep it intimate so that’s why we chose Rada (studios) and Mojos, we thought it was really cool with the band.”

“Those guys mean a lot to me and my performance.”

You can find Hyclass’ new song ‘Queen’ on Spotify and Apple music, and if you didn’t catch her at Listen Out, check out some of her live performances on Youtube; it’s a vibe.

INTERVIEW & IMAGE BY J AC K S O N L AV E L L - L E E

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MUSIC REVIEWS // VOL 4: ED.4 Stars are Blind | Paris Hilton, 2006

Multi-talented pop sensation Paris Hilton’s debut single ‘Stars are Blind’ will forever be one of the best dance songs of all time. The lead single for her debut album perfectly captures the style of her music and the mastery of her talent. This mid-tempo reggae fusion is the lyrical embodiment of everything good with the world. With beautiful autotune, poetic lyrics such as “those other guys, they wanna take me for a ride,” and “oh no, oh,” and, of course, Paris Hilton herself, nothing about this song is bad. Nothing. Quite easily the best song to ever grace the pop-culture scene, we should all be grateful it has blessed our ears.

Hilton’s star-crossed-inspired single is simply a masterpiece. There is a reason it had one of the highest debuts of 2006.

By Tristan Sherlock

Nothing in the World | Paris Hilton, 2006

The O.G. you-are-with-her-but-I’m-so-much-better bop, ‘Nothing in this World’ is another mid-tempo undeniably catchy song. The second single of Paris Hilton’s debut album, Paris, is clearly the inspiration for Taylor Swift’s ‘You Belong With Me’ and ‘Girlfriend’ by Avril Lavigne.

This song is emotional, sexy and simply amazing. ‘Nothing in this World’ comes accompanied with some of the best lyrics in music history: “I can do what she can do so much better.” The combined vocals of Paris and Ke$ha (before the latter’s official music debut) bolster the already undeniable perfection that is ‘Nothing in this World.’ This is easily the best song ever written about the struggles of unrequited love, and possibly the best song of all time.

By Tristan Sherlock

Do Ya Think I’m Sexy? | Paris Hilton, 2006

Disliking covers of songs is becoming an increasingly popular pastime (just go to the comment section of any Glee cover), but it’s undeniable that Paris Hilton’s cover of ‘Do Ya Think I’m Sexy?’ is one of the best — if not the best — covers of all time. Paris’ ‘Do Ya Think I’m Sexy?’ captures the tone of the original piece (I don’t actually know who the artist is) but it also adds Paris’ own flair. The soft vocals and mid-tempo beats of this powerful love ballad make for a soothing song that perfectly concludes the album, Paris. If you ever need a song for a pole dancing competition this might just be the song for you. ‘Do Ya Think I’m Sexy?’ will make you fan yourself while plagiarising Paris’ iconic phrase “that’s hot.”

By Tristan Sherlock

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FILM // VOL 4: ED.4

The Life and Death of a Bad Idea: The “Popular Film” Oscar Earlier this year, the Internet got word that the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences would shorten the 91st Academy Awards (or The Oscars) to a 3 hour telecast, rather than the 4 hour program from previous years.

They would be moving several categories to edited segments played at the end of the broadcast, leaving room for ‘more important’ categories in the main telecast.

Black Panther, both of which had little chance against the ‘prestige’ mentality of Oscar voters.

Oh, and they’d also be adding a new category for reasons that no one could understand.

It wasn’t a bad idea because it would give bigger movies an Oscar, it was bad because it would deny many of them true recognition.

This was the ill-advised and mercifully dropped idea for an Oscar called ‘Best Achievement in Popular Film.’

It would be an award for more mainstream films the Academy decides aren’t worthy of the oh-so-precious Best Picture award, but should be recognised anyway.

The smart people out there would say this is a response to the years when Best Picture went to lower-grossing independent films like Spotlight, Moonlight and The Shape of Water.

It’s also a response to the resounding success of Wonder Woman and

The ‘Popular Film Oscar’ lasted mere months, and was shut down entirely in August after an internal vote. Some of the members who loudly championed eliminating the Oscar were Laura Dern and Steven Spielberg.

It’s like getting a participation award: nice, but meaningless. And what were the stipulations for “popular?” Did it have to make above a certain amount domestically or worldwide? Did it have to be bound by a specific budget? What about critically-acclaimed and highly-regarded financial disappointments like Blade Runner 2049 and Mad Max: Fury Road? Do critical rankings on Rotten Tomatoes or Metacritic count? What about movies audiences loved but critics weren’t sure about, like The Greatest Showman or the Fast &

Furious films?

This was one of the only times when the internet was unanimously against a dumb idea.

It might come back one day down the line, maybe. Many people, including this writer, believe that the only new category worthy of being added is one for “Best Stunt Coordination,” but will that ever be considered?

And what about relegating some categories to edited segments during the end-credits? Is that still happening? Is three hours enough to give every gifted creative their dues?

Who the hell would host such an already-controversial show? So many questions, so little time.

By Christopher Spencer

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FILM // VOL 4: ED.4

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FILM // VOL 4: ED.4

WHERE MY QUEERS AT? When Jack Whitehall was announced to be playing Disney’s first openly gay character in the forthcoming Jungle Cruise, outrage sparked. A wildfire of angry comments spread online, expressing their disappointment at how a queer character was yet again being played by a straight, cisgendered actor. And while the rage seems manufactured, to some degree, it’s warranted.

Of all the 2018 box office films, can you name one that was led by a queer actor? Doubtable. Can you name a queer film that was led by a straight actor? All of them. 2018’s Love, Simon, 2017’s Call Me By Your Name and God’s Own Country, 2016’s Moonlight, and 2015’s Carol were all led by straight actors.

It’s disappointing that in recent years all the best box office LGBT+ films have had zero queer actors in the lead role. But not only that, I cannot name a single queer, actor other than Ezra Miller, who has led a Hollywood film even as a straight character. (Ezra isn’t scheduled to lead his film until 2020.)

It’s evident that there are problems with Hollywood casting. Queer actors can’t get straight roles nor can they get queer roles. But when they do receive them, it’s before coming out.

So where does that leave queer actors?

It appears that casting directors

have a hard time seeing past an individuals’ queerness. Queer actors are stuck in less notable queer roles and their ability to act straight is seen as non-existent by casting directors.

This issue isn’t just notable in Hollywood blockbusters, it’s also an issue in television.

Actor Andy Mientus went on a bit of a twitter rant when the news of Jack Whitehall’s casting dropped, saying in one tweet: “I don’t want to get to a place where casting must be literal …” And in another tweet Mientus, continued on by saying “I have never played straight on television. The few queer male actors who have possess [sic] traits which society has decided ‘pass’ for straight and some were still in the closet at the time they did…”

number of queer actors out of a job.

There needs to be a balance.

It’s clear to see why queer actors are advised to stay in the closet given the lack of roles they’re able to play.

This needs to change. And not just for queer actors, for actors with disability, actors of colour, all actors.

The entire system that determines what roles are being played and who gets the roles needs to be restructured. The world needs to see that more than just a straight, white, cisgendered, able-bodied Matt Boomer doppelgänger can succeed in Hollywood.

By Tristan Sherlock Art by Claire Solano @chlorofluoro_artist

Diverse roles in film and television are abysmally lacking, therefore queer roles are scarce and are seen as more prestigious; which causes straight actors to snatch them up.

Now, in reference to the DisneyWhitehall scandal, we shouldn’t look at recasting Whitehall’s role. That would be counterintuitive. What needs to be done, is queer actors need to be given more straight roles (and more queer roles as well) to level out the playing field.

We don’t only want gay actors playing gay characters, that form of typecasting would just be problematic and would still leave a large

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FILM REVIEWS // VOL 4: ED.4

The Wife | Björn Runge, 2017

Johnny English | David Kerr, 2018

Directed by Björn Runge, The Wife stars Glenn Close, Jonathan Pryce, and Christian Slater. Joan (Close) is the ‘long-suffering’ wife to acclaimed writer Joseph Castleman (Pryce), who is to receive the Nobel Prize in Literature. During their time in Stockholm, Joan and Joe begin to question nearly every aspect of their marriage, which uncovers horrible truths long buried. All I can say after watching this movie is Glenn Close NEEDS to win the Oscar, for God’s sake. The Wife is a show of great craft from director Runge, and excellent writing by Jane Anderson, as well as great acting from almost everyone involved (some supporting performances around them are a little weak). The story is also being told from a few flashbacks which explore the meaning behind certain incredible twists later in the story. These scenes almost feel like different parts of a different movie, but when it’s Glenn Close and Jonathan Pryce going toe-to-toe - it’s incredible. The Wife is a film that sucks you deep into its web of twists and turns, and you come out feeling enlightened and partially disturbed.

By Christopher Spencer

Spy films are usually adrenaline-filled, predictable pieces that fail to create a new reaction from the viewer.

There haven’t been too many films that challenge this common formula. This one does. Johnny English Strikes Back is truly one of the most entertaining spy films to date. Filled with action-packed scenes and lots of humour, the film had me honk-laughing. With Rowan Atkinson taking the reigns as the fabled Johnny English. The actor perfectly epitomises the clumsy, resourceful but ever-socharming spy who is sent to save the day. His charisma is truly unmatched. He is undoubtedly 300% better than James Bond. Simply put, Mr. Bean is a stud. No questions asked. There are points where the viewer may dance in their seat and whip out a dab. Occasionally, there are moments that are very cringe-worthy (which made me die on the inside), but all the fantastic one-liners that are fired out of English’s comedy gun make it all worthwhile.

Johnny English Strikes Back is definitely worth a watch if you want a great night out, or something quite different from your typical Bond film.

By Adam Di Tuillo

American Animals | Bart Layton, 2018 From documentary filmmaker Bart Layton, comes an audacious heist thriller based on a true crime story.

Spencer (Barry Keoghan) longs for something eventful to happen in his life. When he meets up with his rebellious friend, Warren (Evan Peters), the two discover their library is in possession of a rare art collection. And the only person guarding this collection is an old librarian. With dollar signs in their eyes and the help of some childhood friends, they plan what appears to be a simple heist. But things take a turn for the worst when the gang realises they are out of their depth. What makes this film stand out from others in the genre is that it is actually part documentary. It frequently switches between re-enactments with Hollywood actors and interviews with the real culprits, which proves to be a unique way of presenting the story.

Each person recalls their own version of how the events took place and the film plays on this for a comedic effect.

By the third act, the film becomes a poignant reminder of the dangers of peer pressure. Layton has given us a compelling heist film that certainly puts the Ocean’s franchise to shame. By Jesse Newell 56 DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4

BOOK REVIEWS // VOL 4: ED.4 Leonardo da Vinci | Walter Isaacson, 2018

Walter Isaacson’s lengthy book includes vibrant pictures of Leonardo’s famous paintings and pages from his notebooks. As a gay, left-handed, vegetarian genius, he associated with many of the movers and shakers of his era: Michelangelo, Machiavelli, the Borgia clan, as well as popes and a couple of French kings. Da Vinci did not publish any of his major discoveries but luckily thousands of pages of his notebooks survived. These detail investigations into many fields: anatomy, engineering, optics, geology, hydraulics, and all on top of this impressive skill as a painter of unforgettable pictures.

His studies into optics informed the complexity and realism of his paintings.

Despite being over 500 pages and discussing a number of technical and scientific terms, the book is easy to follow and enhanced by many illustrations. Leonardo was the ‘sensitive new age guy’ about 500 years before it was fashionable.

By Andrew Douglas

No Friend But The Mountain | Behrouz Boochani, 2018

Many books nowadays are a pastime; they help us fill our hours with entertaining content. Few really seek to challenge our opinions or change our perspectives. No Friend But The Mountains is one such book, a transparent account that details the experiences of refugees on Manus Island.

It’s disruptive and provoking in the best possible way. A defining read that has received resounding praise since its release in July. Written over many months, via a hidden phone, by Kurdish refugee Behrouz Boochani, No Friend uses poetry and personal accounts to reveal the inhumane conditions faced by asylum seekers. Frank as it is, No Friend is far from an easy read. It flies in the face of all our Australian values and exposes the nastier side of immigration politics. It’s a raw, real and entirely necessary account of what’s happening not far from our shores. A unique read that will untether you, No Friend sticks with its readers long after the last page.

By Elisha Hammond

A Mis-Guide to Anywhere | Wrights & Sites, 2006 “For one night, change places with someone you know in your town.

Swap rooms and take note of the different sounds, new information and sensations you experience as you fall asleep and as you awaken.” This is how one of the instructions reads from UK site-specific artists, Wrights & Sites, in their radical book, A Mis-Guide to Anywhere. It’s not a novel in any traditional sense, but it can certainly alter your perspective on things.

Basically, Mis-Guide is an artsy pocketbook filled with instructions on how to see the world anew. “Look for the nonhuman” or “use the windows of your city as if they were movie screens” or “find somewhere to be private in a public space.” Embedded throughout its colourful pages are thoughts from the book’s makers; I interpret their philosophy to be a mindful one. Rather than driving or walking mindlessly, Mis-Guide encourages the reader to go towards the uncanny, get lost, take new paths – all in an effort bring one’s awareness to the brilliantly interesting world that surrounds us. More ideas can be found at www.mis-guide.com. Have fun exploring!

By Zachary Sheridan DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4 57

CREATIVE // VOL 4: ED.4

The Gap YOU Speak Politics. Politics. Politics.

Don’t they, make us…

Tick?

Who is we and what is Mut-you-al?

Am I, not I and well, you; YOU?

This gap you speak hath but your definition; Yet I, still well, sit and listen To the regime and mission of; dare I say, your intuition.

I am I! and you; you!

I doth love and respect thee yet continue my plea

That you doth love and respect ye thus to create, a we

By Sabrina Johnston

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FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

Where’s the Subtitle?

Maybe once or twice but never thrice - behind the door, on the wooden floor we’d hear it stiffly whispered by the creak: “Kadang sulit ‘tuk mengartikanmu; tiada bait, rima pun tak ‘ku temu”, just once or twice but never thrice “Mungkin masalahnya suku kata, terlalu banyak terhitung mata”, We’d hear it whispered by the creak “Dan untuk selain bahasa terjamu, semerta landaikanlah semua hurufmu”, We’d clearly hear it once and twice and maybe thrice

Then, a pointless declaration: “You probably tried to listen in, but if you’ve been listening, I wasn’t talking to you.”

Though I admit I’ve tucked my lies out, maybe once or twice but never thrice, we hear the foreign whisper evermore - behind that door, on that creaky wooden floor.

By Krishna Aksa 59 DIRCKSEY MAGAZINE VOL 4: ED.4

FEATURE // VOL 4: ED.4

Dead or alive… where does it end?

Or perhaps it doesn’t!

The City of Joondalup welcomes its internationally renowned Artist-in-Residence for 2018 – Dr Helen Pynor.

She will be in town from 13 October – 30 November to create a new artistic work and forge connections with the local Joondalup community.

Dr. Pynor is fascinated in the boundaries between life and death and is set to host a panel discussion On the Emergent Properties of Regeneration.

Time: Thursday 25 October 2018, 6.00pm Place: Edith Cowan University, Joondalup Event is free, however places are limited.

For further information on Helen’s residency, or to attend this event visit joondalup.wa.gov.au

PHOTO CREDIT: Helen Pynor, The End is a Distant Memory, 2016 (Video still) Installation: six single-channel videos with sound, photography, objects.

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