The Eyeopener: Volume 53, Issue 21 by The Eyeopener

HANG IN THERE Volume 53 - Issue 21

April 1, 2020

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Illustration: Pernia Jamshed

what just happened

Shit hit the fan. A provincial policy that defunded student groups. The termination of the RSU. And a global pandemic to top it all off. Alexandra Holyk and Madi Wong report on the takeaways for the community ILLUSTRATION: KHALED BADAWI

or two years, David Jardine has been heavily involved in student life on campus—from being the now-former president of the Ryerson Science Society, to working as a residence advisor at the International Living/Learning Centre (ILC), to proposing a new student government structure. But Jardine has struggled with constant “wrecking balls” being thrown at students. There were numerous times this year when it seemed like the universe wanted everyone to give up, Jardine says. “And, I mean, I think everyone at certain points did for at least a little bit. And I think that’s valid.” Nothing prepared Jardine for the email they received when Ryerson announced students living on campus would have to move out within five days because of COVID-19. “I can’t remember a time in the last two or three years where I cried as much as I did.” “Every single thing that has happened...I can’t comprehend that this is the same year. This has all been one year.” Ryerson students have faced a tumultuous year to say the least. It started with the implementation of the Student Choice Initiative (SCI), which drained numerous student groups and unions of their funds—only to later be deemed unlawful (a decision that is now being appealed). This was followed by Ryerson’s termination of the operating agreement with the Ryerson Students’ Union (RSU). Now, students have been uprooted from their homes due to the COVID-19 pandemic. After a year of chaos, Ryerson students and leaders speak to us about how they have navigated everything, the lessons they learned and how to move forward.

“Most students on campus [recognized] that paying into these things is beneficial. Obviously, some services suffered more than others, and I think that’s super unfair,” says Jardine. On Nov. 21, 2019, it was announced that an Ontario Divisional Court ruled unanimously that SCI was “unlawful.” Adam Asmar and Charmaine Reid have faced this year’s turmoil together as RyeACCESS coordinators.“The overturning of SCI was huge,” says Asmar. But, the RSU hadn’t received any funding since the fall 2018 semester, including the opt-in fees of fall 2019 when the SCI was in place. The uncertainty around what they could afford to do prevented Asmar and Reid from pursuing things they wanted to, running off only savings. Asmar recalls the opt-out portal from the SCI being implemented on Ryerson’s RAMSS system without notice, while his friends from the University of Toronto were given warning. “Ryerson just woke up one morning and [said], ‘Oh, here’s the portal!’ Now we have to organize a campaign to stay opted in.” Ali Patel, a third-year biomedical engineering student, says the university did a “very very bad job” when putting up the SCI portal. “I didn’t have a chance to go through everything else and see what I wanted to support and what I didn’t want to support.” When the November ruling happened, overturning the SCI, Ryerson made a good decision—they announced the portal suspension. “But we still didn’t get our funding,” Asmar says.

“You can’t do everything. You can’t save everything”

sci? more like sci-bye On Jan. 17, 2019, the provincial government introduced the SCI to give post-secondary students the ability to opt out of certain fees that were previously a mandatory part of tuition. “The SCI was so hard to navigate...It was just always so unclear,” RSU president Vanessa Henry says, adding that all communications were like “a copy and paste” of what the government said. Sixty per cent of full-time students opted into the RSU in September—more than services like the campus radio station and student refugee program received.

till termination do us part On Jan. 24, the university announced its termination of the 1986 Operating Agreement with the RSU, citing it had “lost confidence” in the union’s ability to represent and serve students. A few days later, the RSU announced they filed a legal claim against the university with the Ontario Superior Court of Justice. Vicky Cheung, a second-year child and youth care student, says she felt the communication of events in the past year has been “really unclear”—the termination being an example. She says she assumed the university didn’t want to post too much information because of the court case, but it made her not trust the school as much.

During a hearing on March 6, the RSU sought an injunction—requiring the university to temporarily comply with the operating agreement by recognizing the RSU as the official student union and transferring withheld fees. Following the hearing, an Ontario Superior Court judge granted the injunction. “I think [the granting of the injunction] set a huge precedent, not just for the RSU but for schools all across Ontario,” says RSU president Vanessa Henry. “Don’t infringe on our democratic right to run a student government... don’t try to silence a union who is working and still putting on events despite the lack of money and resources available to us.” According to Henry, vice-provost, students Jen McMillen said Ryerson doesn’t plan on appealing the injunction result. “I would say that it was a learning lesson for [the university]. And I think they needed to do that for themselves to see how meaningful the RSU is.” “[The injunction grant] felt like we won some sense of stability and some enforced respect from the university,” Reid says. But Reid says there was never a time during this situation where students were given the ability to consult before the university acted. “I struggled...being caught in between ‘I want to see the RSU burn’ and ‘I want to see Ryerson told to stop having a power trip,’” says Jardine. “We hate the system that gave us Ram Ganesh but also that system is what gave us the Equity Service Centres. So it’s very complex,” they say. Jardine added that it was a struggle to get students to see the termination and formation of a new student government as anything other than “black and white.”

However, it was announced the following day that students living in residence buildings would have to move out by March 23. Only students with “exceptional circumstances” were allowed to stay or have extra time to move out. Jardine says as a leader to students living at ILC, seeing students be uprooted without certainty of when they would see their peers again was like having a “rug pulled out from under their feet.” “It was just so hard to be in a position where my job is to support them...When I’m also struggling a lot.” Students on exchange were also asked to return as student internships and practicums were cancelled. June 2020 convocation was also postponed until fall. “I still can’t really comprehend how much [COVID-19] has changed our lives...This isn’t something that we can do anything about other than just adapt to change our entire lifestyle, Jardine says. As for the RSU’s Equity Service Centres, Henry says they’re trying to adhere to students’ needs by providing access to external resources. She adds that RSU board meetings are being run online, however, training the incoming executive team poses a challenge. With all levels of government advising people to stay inside, it’s unclear what the future holds for the Ryerson community. “We are trying to be creative and deal with a very difficult situation. I’m very positive that we’ll learn a lot from it and will be much stronger in the future,” says Lachemi.

“It was like having a rug pulled out from under students’ feet”

uprooted by covid-19 On March 13, Ryerson campus life came to a standstill when the university announced the cancellation of in-person classes in light of COVID-19. Patel came out of a midterm with no idea what was going on. COVID-19 led to the cancellation of major Ryerson events, like the fashion school’s Intro and Mass Exodus fashion show, students on exchange being asked to return home and June 2020 convocation being postponed until fall. In an interview with The Eye on March 16, Ryerson president Mohamed Lachemi confirmed student residences would remain open.

ooking back, Asmar says in times like this—especially as a student leader—it’s important to ground yourself. “Don’t just abandon student life when things get hard, because you’re in it for a reason.” Reid’s advice is to “get involved casually” with student life. “Go to a few events, learn how to follow the news of the RSU...you can have a better university experience by getting involved,” she says. Though letting go may be unpopular advice, Jardine says it is one of the things they have learned throughout the year. “Everyone has to recognize that you can’t do everything, you can’t save everything.” “Sometimes things are out of your control. Whether that be because Doug Ford passed a law that you don’t agree with, or a deadly virus is spreading…. You just can’t save everything.” With files from Sarah Krichel

Which Ryerson crisis RU?

Find out which hot news topic of the 2019-20 year relates to you the most by completing the quiz below!

START HERE! RU a commuter student?

LOL NO. I absolutely do not commute

SHAMELESSLY YES. It be like that sometimes

RU still late to class even though you live close by?

NO WTF. I am absolutely positively PERFECT

YES, I hate it, thanks How long is your commute?

MORE THAN AN HOUR— ughhhh

LESS THAN HOUR— super blessed

RU involved in extracurriculars on campus? (e.g., clubs, student groups)

UH HUH HONEY

UR CONSTRUCTION. A common but mysterious character, your actions are completely unexpected and terribly inconvenient. No one knows when you’ll be back off your BS.

Do you usually sit near the front or the back of the lecture hall?

RU still late to classes even though they’re all online?

(Watch me throw it) BACK

FRONT BABY. We’re here to learn ah ah ah Were the Ryerson Students’ Union and Ryerson on a break?

NO. #TeamRSU

Me? NEVER

NO. Now that I’m home, I’ve got my shit together

RU an introvert or an extrovert?

EXTROVERT. Yelling is my indoor voice

UR THE RSU TERMINATION. You will always fight for what you believe in and what’s yours—so drop kick your sibling and take the last cookie because you deserve it.

UR RYE’S STUDENT GOVERNMENT. Commonly confused with the RSU, you essentially also stand up for what you believe in, but only for like, six weeks.

YES. Don’t come after me for having no motivation and prioritizing Netflix over my responsibilities

INTROVERT *smol giggles*

UR ONLINE CLASSES BECAUSE OF COVID-19. It’s week three. Your professor tries to set up Zoom for the third time—it’s not funny anymore. You’ve finally accepted that this is what life will be like for a while.

UR THE ONE-DAY STUDENT STRIKE. A nice walk in Queen’s Park sounds so appealing to you right about now, but only if you get to hold a sign and chant about OSAP cuts.

QUIZ: Alexandra Holyk, Madi Wong | DESIGN: Alexandra Holyk | VISUALS: Ryan Dioso, Khaled Badawi, Jamie Strand, Elana Emer

see you soon a final word from the editor

Dear student, The last time we spoke, the world was a different place. It had 41,000 more people walking in it. Whether you’re struggling or watching those around you struggle, everyone is experiencing this crisis. Maybe you’re facing severe depression and anxiety amid now-meaningless assignments. Maybe your graduation ceremony was postponed but you have to go home, outside of Toronto or Canada before the fall. Maybe you’re panicking about being able to afford rent, tuition or food. Maybe you’re feeling down with all the time you’re spending in your head these days. Or maybe you or someone you love is sick. Students are generally some of the most vulnerable people—we’re in the palms of an institution with complete control over the potential of our futures. That’s exactly why The Eyeopener watches over how Ryerson chooses to take care of its community—not just in this crisis—but in every crisis. Often, Ryerson is the perpetrator of these crises—which comes as no surprise if you read our paper or page two of this issue. It’s no thanks to the university that students made it through this year. It’s because of student solidarity and action that students get through anything the world throws at us. We had to cancel two weeks’ worth of print editions, but the show had to go on for our final issue of the year—at least, for now, as a PDF online—despite every Eye editor and contributor going through their own struggles right now. This week, we made something a little different than our regular newspaper—we made something fun for you to keep in your back pocket this summer. In this issue, you’ll find poetry, games, a colouring panel, lessons learned and more. This issue puts COVID-19 into a different perspective, because the Ryerson community doesn’t need more collective anxiety right now. The Eye just wants to help you pass the time. This is my last written piece for The Eye, since a new editor-in-chief will soon take the reins, and I leave knowing that the student body is watching out for itself. Ryerson will always be just another business trying to convince you that you need a degree to be okay in life—but, to me, the Ryerson community is what has always mattered. It’s what made everything worth it. I’m grateful for the five years I got to tell your stories. Now, hang in there Ryerson, and see you soon. Sincerely, Sarah Krichel Editor-in-Chief, 2019-20

the contributors who got us through the last three weeks: thank you Samreen Maqsood Sarah Tomlinson Akansha Dhingra Reedah Hayder Kashish Hura Abby Hughes Denise Paglinawan Jaime Strand Laila Amer Sabrina Kauk Ryan Dioso Ben Okazawa Will Baldwin Matt Vocino

Raine Hernandez Joseph Shenouda Gavin Axelrod Joseph Casciaro Ella Bonaldi Hayden Godfrey Therese Sevilla Gary-Joseph Panganiban Jonathan Bradley Urbi Khan Uhanthaen Ravilojan Constance Osuchowski Aaliyah Dasoo Josh Scott Jes Mason

Emma Moore Sofia Vavaroutsos Jack Wise Manuela Vega Abeer Khan Zawadi Bunzigiye Heidi Lee Nabeeha Baig Megan Mullen Manus Hopkins Mike Alves Julia Mlodzik Tess Thomas Adrian Bueno

watercolour by Catherine Abes

two indian comfort food recipes

from a communities editor’s mom

By Dhriti Gupta and Sumita Gupta

ingredients

Nobody does comfort food like brown people. We will douse anything in sugar syrup. Ghee, a.k.a. clarified butter, is a condiment in our households. Hell, we even deep-fry bread...as a breakfast food. But while there are tons of sugary, rich, cream-filled dishes in my culture, comfort for me lies in the simpler things. Take a break from stress-baking your coronavirus bread rations and try out these easy and light recipes as your next quarantine cooking venture. For that extra special touch of brown mom love, force everyone in your house to eat your creations by telling them they’ve gotten too skinny.

2 tbsp ghee or olive/vegetable oil 1 cup sooji (semolina/cream of wheat) 1 cup granulated sugar 3 cups water ¼ cup raisins ¼ cup slivered or crushed almonds One pinch green cardamom powder for garnish (optional)

sooji ka halwa Growing up, whenever I was sick, the only thing that would get me out of bed was the nutty aroma of roasted sooji. This warm, porridge-like dessert is made of semolina, almonds, raisins and water, and only takes about 15 minutes to prepare. Absolutely nothing hits like a warm bowl of sooji ka halwa when your throat is sore and the clouds are grey—or in this case, when the streets are empty and the social interaction is lacking.

PHOTO CREDIT: JULIA MLODZIK

instructions 1. In a large non-stick pan, heat up the ghee or oil for about 30 seconds to a minute. 2. Add in the sooji and roast it on medium to low heat until it turns a nice golden brown. Remove from heat and let stand while completing steps 3 and 4. 3. In a saucepan, heat the water and dissolve the sugar in it. Switch off the heat and let stand for five minutes. 4. Add the raisins and almonds to the sugar water in the saucepan. 5. After about five minutes, once both the sooji and sugar water have cooled down a bit, carefully transfer the warm sugar water into the sooji pan. If you start to hear a sizzle as you start pouring the water in, things are still too hot and the steam might hurt you! Give it a few more minutes to cool down and go watch some TikToks (sigh—if only you had a recommendation list). 6. Cook the mixture on medium-high heat, stirring until the sooji absorbs the water. It should have porridge-like consistency and be a light-brown colour. 7. You’re done! Scoop the warm halwa into a bowl and top with a shake of cardamom powder and more almonds to enjoy. If you wanna get fancy with your presentation, you can pack it into a small bowl and invert it onto a plate to make a lil halwa cake.

rajma One of my other favourite foods, rajma, is basically Indian chili. One time, my mom even entered her rajma into a chili-making competition and won. Everyone thinks their mom makes the best rajma, but how many moms can say their rajma has won a chili competition? Yeah, that’s what I thought. Either way, there’s no better way to beat the quarantine blues than settling down to rewatch the flu season episode of Parks and Recreation with a steaming bowl of rajma.

ingredients 2 cups dry light red-kidney beans OR 2 cups canned red-kidney beans 4 cups water if you’re using an instant pot, or 1 ½ cups water if you’re using canned beans 3 tbsp olive or vegetable oil 1 tsp fresh ginger, grated or ginger paste ½ tsp garlic, minced ½ of a medium-sized onion, finely chopped 2 tomatoes, finely chopped 1 whole black cardamom A pinch of powdered clove (optional) A pinch of asafoetida powder (optional) 1/2 tsp red chili powder 2 tsp coriander powder 1 tsp cumin seeds 1 ¼ tsp salt or to taste

instructions With an instant pot, start here: 1. Wash and soak light red kidney beans for four hours 2. Place 4 cups of water in the instant pot and boil them on pressure cooker mode for 1 hour and 30 minutes.

With canned beans, start here: 4. Add asafoetida powder (if you have it), ginger, garlic and onions. Sauté till the onions look translucent in colour. 5. Now add in tomatoes and stir, letting it cook on low heat with the lid on for about 10 minutes. It’s ready when you can see the oil separating from the rest of the mixture. 6. If you cooked your beans using the instant pot, transfer them to the tomato mixture, without draining the water. If you use the canned beans, transfer them in without draining as well, but add in 1 ½ cups of water. 7. Put the lid on and simmer for about 30 to 40 minutes, until the tomatoes and beans are integrated. If you prefer a thicker curry, you can remove the lid and let some of the water evaporate. 8. If you want to keep it traditional, serve on top of basmati rice with a squeeze of lemon and fresh cilantro. If you want to swindle some white people like my mom did, take the chili route and serve in a bowl, topped with sour cream and shredded cheese. If you make either of these delicious recipes, take a picture and tag us on social media! We’re at @the_eyeopener on Instagram and @theeyeopener on Twitter. Please, just do it. It’ll make my mom so happy.

10 TikTok accounts to help you pass the time during quarantine By Catherine Abes and Dhriti Gupta It’s week three of quarantine and you’re probably looking for something—or rather, anything—to bide the time. Especially now that you’ve eaten all of your end of the world Hot Cheetos, finished playing Animal Crossing: New Horizons and bothered everyone in your household to the point that you’re no longer on speaking terms. There’s only one solution left: enter TikTok, a platform for young, hip, conventionally attractive teenagers who are all weirdly good at dancing. Ignore your friends who have warned you that once you’re in there’s no going back…. please, just join us. Ghosthoney Tyler has one of those podcast voices that is so soothing to listen to. Regardless of what he’s chatting about: whether it be his favourite household items, an adventure with his husband or donning a silk shirt and assuming his 19th century romance novel alter-ego—you’ll immediately feel calmer after listening to him. Bomanizer Boman’s TikTok account has re-

cently gone viral for his hilarious reality show edits of his everyday life. Our personal favourite moment is when he went into labour to give birth to someone who would actually hang out with him (a big mood). He’s also a fourthyear Ryerson RTA student!

have simply given up on your degree and are now pursuing a bachelor in throwing it back. Bradosterhoutt If you thought Megan Thee Stallion was the CEO of ass-throwing, you’re wrong. Meet Brad. We’re not certain that it’s humanly possible for the average person’s spine to handle all that curvature. Nonetheless, he makes helpful tutorials for those of us who are a little less talented in the ass throwage department.

Deadave It’s hard to describe TikTok humour, but this is basically it: unhinged. Follow David for absurdist Gen Z jokes and to witness his descent into madness this quarantine szn. DeksyTheCat If you’re worried that your cat is upset about you being home so often now, be grateful that they aren’t as angry as Deksy. And if they are, consider calling a pet trainer? Or a priest. BoelterDesignCo Weird flex but there’s something so viscerally calming about watching someone paint plants. Rise and grind Twitter never said that this *doesn’t* count as engaging in a new art practice.

Tootymcnooty Lulu of Tootymcnooty does adorable and original animations of popular TikTok audios, blobby creatures called “ribbits,” memes and more generally wholesome content. PHOTO CREDIT: LAILA AMER

Keke.janajah Nothing but respect for the creator of the infamous Savage dance challenge. This challenge was a cultural reset: separating those who were somewhat OK at dancing from those who actually can dance. Follow Keke if you too

Astapasta3 Astuanta is simply the funniest person on the internet. Nothing else needs to be said. Bludetiger Fuck it, hot girl covering popular TikTok songs on her bass. This one’s for the girls and the gays <3.

CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE

Help deliver a secret message to Rye’s president As a member of this cursed, wretched world, you’ve been tasked with delivering a top-secret message to Ryerson president Mohamed Lachemi. Choose wisely.

The fate of Ryerson has fallen into your hands. You have been given a confidential letter that you must bring to Ryerson president Mohamed Lachemi, who could be anywhere on campus. The contents of the letter are unknown—for now—but it’s imperative the mission is completed. Ryerson campus can be your best friend or your worst enemy, as it’s filled with tricks, turns and dangerous outcomes—even death. Each step of your journey presents you with two options to choose from. Should you choose to accept this mission, it’s up to you to pick the best path that will ensure the message is delivered safely. Good luck.

YOUR JOURNEY BEGINS AT YONGE AND GOULD STREETS

GO TOWARD THE SHELDON & TRACY LEVY STUDENT LEARNING CENTRE (SLC)

GO TOWARD THE GOULD STREET CONSTRUCTION

WELCOME TO THE SLC

GO TOWARD LIBRARY

GO TO THE BEACH FLOOR

YOU HAVE A CONVERSATION WITH RAM GANESH ASK HIM ABOUT THE RSU

Former Ryerson Students’ Union (RSU) president Ganesh disappeared off the face of the Earth after the alleged credit card scandal. Instead of asking him for intel, you test the waters and ask him, “Ganesh, where IS the money from last year?” He cackles. The ground begins to tremble and the concrete cracks as Ganesh shakes and twirls his hands like a torpedo in front of you. A small, electric orb forms between his palms, until it grows larger than your head. He screeches and hurls the orb at your chest. You fly across campus. Your body is never found. GAME OVER

ASK HIM FOR INTEL

In the back corner, an entire game of tackle football is happening, students are watching Netflix with no headphones on and somebody is doing a photoshoot by the window. You look for the gentle giant that is Lachemi, becoming increasingly distraught as you realize you’ve chosen the wrong floor. You yawn—this mission is exhausting. That’s when you spot it: a vacant body chair. For the first time in history, there isn’t a threesome in sight on one of them. You tell yourself, “I’ll just close my eyes for a minute.” Before you know it, you awaken with a start. You look outside and it’s well into the night. You reach for your phone in your pocket but can’t find it—the phone or your pocket. Everything you own has been stolen. You lay in the chair, naked and ashamed. GAME OVER Illustration by Jimmy Kwan Board game design by Andrea Josic Adventure by Andrea Josic, Nathaniel Crouch and Zachary Roman

CHOOSE YOUR OWN ADVENTURE

YOU’RE STOPPED BY RSU ELECTION ACCEPT WAFFLE CAMPAIGNERS DECLINE WAFFLE

In this universe, it’s always election season, which means it’s time to pretend to listen to people’s campaigns so you can have a dry waffle covered in discount maple syrup. A piece gets lodged in your trachea. You begin coughing violently, all the while the campaigner continues to make promises about engaging with student life and striving to make transit affordable or something. You kneel to the ground, face turning purple with a lack of oxygen. You use your final breath to plead for mercy, and the last thing you hear is, “Make sure you vote!” GAME OVER

Surely, Lachemi would be hiding amongst the stacks and the academia waiting for you to deliver the sacred message. You scour each floor, but alas, nothing. Defeated, you retreat to the 10th floor—until you hear some chittering. Maybe Lachemi took his lunch break in privacy and is nibbling away at a sandwich. You turn the corner, excited to meet your maker—until you see something horrifying: hundreds of bed bugs. They’re busy eating the librarian, so you try to walk away slowly to escape. Like the clumsy asshole you are, you back into a bookshelf and GO DOWN THE HALL GO INTO THE LIBRARY send it tumbling down. The bed bugs turn in unison. They assemble into one large transformer bed bug and their little pincers are the last thing you see before the world goes dark. GAME OVER

WELCOME TO THE LIBRARY

WELCOME TO JORGENSON HALL 13TH FLOOR

WELCOME TO KERR HALL

When the door opens, you are greeted by the unholy sight of Egerton Ryerson T-posing. It isn’t the asshole himself back from the dead—it’s the statue of him from Gould Street. AND IT’S TALKING. AND, OH FUCK, IT CAN MOVE TOO. Egerton blasts his arms out in front of you, stopping you in your tracks. “Just where the fuck do you think you’re going?” You aren’t sure if you should mention that you’re on a mission to deliver a secret letter to Lachemi. “Don’t you dare lie to me,” says Egerton. At this point, lying seems like the more dangerous option so you tell him the truth. Egerton’s robot eyes turn red, “That’s the end of the road for you bastard!” He exclaims as he decimates you with his steely arms and laser eyes. GAME OVER

BATTLE A DEMON EGGY WANDER THE HALLS

If Lachemi was hiding somewhere it’d be in Ryerson’s equivalent of a sneaky labyrinth: Kerr Hall. You look around with a strong sense of direction. Maybe he’s perched on the shiny basketball court in the Kerr Hall gym. Or doing lab experiments in Kerr Hall south. O-or m-maybe he’s in a classroom in the basement of Kerr Hall E-e-east? West? Every hall starts to look the same. You desperately mutter, “Never eat shredded wheat,” whipping your head around. You check the compass on your phone and it’s going haywire. “Where am I?” You scream—but nobody can hear you. Vertigo strikes. You lay on the floor, proceeding to spin in circles looking for a way out. Kerr Hall starts to close in on you, producing a devilish bellow as it swallows your pathetic body. GAME OVER

Lachemi tears into the letter with his teeth. He reads aloud, “Dear Mr. Lachemi, this message will not be easy to hear, so I shall be succinct. I am writing to inform you that your tenure as Ryerson’s president is nearing its end. I have found a new human host for my life force to inherit. It just so happens that they are sitting in front of you. I challenged them to a test to prove their worth. By delivering this letter to you, they have passed. I control their soul now, and they will control Ryerson. Far too much went down this year Mr. Lachemi, FAR too much. When you finish reading this message, your mortal form shall finish its time on Earth. Yours truly, Eggy.” Blood starts trickling out of Lachemi’s ears. Before you can blink, his whole desk is covered in blood. He didn’t even have a chance to say a single word before he died. The blood starts floating up off of the desk. You feel yourself drawn to it. Mmm, blood. It has never looked so good before, so tasty. As you, the blood and Eggy’s life force merge into one, you black out. You are the new tyrant overlord of Ryerson. END

8TH FLOOR

ENTER LACHEMI’S OFFICE DELIVER THE MESSAGE

REFUSE TO DELIVER THE MESSAGE

“So, you’ve been expecting me?” you ask Lachemi. “What’s this letter worth to you then?” Lachemi takes a long pause, and a longer pull of his blunt. “Is that a honeyberry backwoods?” you ask, salivating. Lachemi replies, “Yes, $250,000 and yes.” You’re completely shocked. You thought they stopped selling honeyberries in Canada. AND TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY THOUSAND DOLLARS. But something tells you that whatever’s in that envelope is worth much, much more than $250,000. “Mr. Lachemi, I’m afraid I can’t give you this letter,” you say. Lachemi lunges for his desk drawer and pulls out a big-ass sword. You turn around and book it for the door. But it’s too late—it slams shut. Lucky for you, you knew to bring your phase-shifting suit on a mission and you send it through the door. You deus-ex-machina’d that bourgeoisie motherfucker. You open up the letter and see a blank cheque for a million dollars from the Ford government. Congratulations, you’re a winner and a millionaire! END Visit theeyeopener.com for an extended version of the game.

A recession will happen, but it’ll be fine... eventually Aaliyah Dasoo reports on how the class of 2020 is dealing and coping with unpredictable times

or Kayla Thomson, a fourth-year new media student, the job market is always on her mind. Before the outbreak, she recalls visiting employment sites like LinkedIn several times a day, and to her luck, would usually come across pages and pages of jobs posted in her field. After the outbreak, she says she’s been seeing significantly fewer postings for job openings and has seen some positions tak-

“There’s no sort of magic bullet lying around for when you’re going to get into a recession” en off of websites completely. When it comes to jobs she’s already applied to, Thomson has been receiving emails saying that companies have been “postponing” their hiring processes, but isn’t so sure she’ll hear back from them. The influx of employment cancellations has led to a shift in

Thomson’s priorities. Previously, she made a point to look at how much the jobs she applied to would pay her, making sure that it was above minimum wage to help pay off her student debt. Now, she says she’s more concerned with “making money rather than paying off debt.” As we all watch the COVID-19 outbreak, economies across the globe have taken a sharp downturn. Canada is no exception—both Toronto and Ontario have declared a state of emergency. As of March 28, gatherings of over five people have been prohibited by the province and public spaces like parks, libraries and others must close. Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has encouraged Canadians to continue to practice social distancing, and Ontario Premier Doug Ford has also ordered all non-essential workplaces to close for the next two weeks. According to John Shields, an economics expert and, a professor in Ryerson’s department of politics and public administration, the outbreak, while not the only reason we will experiecne as recession, has slowed down economies significantly and as a result quickened the economy’s descend into a recession.

Simply put, if a country has two or more quarters of economic decline—the three month period the business world uses as a financial calendar—it is classified as a recession. Recessions lead to a significant increase in the level of unemployment and a decline in consumer activity, as people aren’t working and are therefore

We don’t know when the outbreak is going to end” less eager to be spending money. Since COVID-19 has impacted the productivity of so many different industries and put so many people out of work, the economy has and will continue to take a sharp downturn. Shields explains that the economy works in cycles of growth and shrinkage. A recession is a part of the necessary cycle of our economy.

He says that in capitalist economies, markets expand all the time, but also have to shrink in order to return things to the status quo. “There’s no sort of magic bullet exactly lying around for when you’re going to get into a recession, or into a boom for that matter,” he says. “But if you look at the history of capitalist economies, it’s very clear that we do go through these different cycles over time.” Shields explains that generally, recessions are quite necessary to correct things like overproduction and the overheating of an economy. Once a recession finally happens, an economy can begin to slowly expand again. Currently, Thomson is employed through Ryerson’s career boost program and works as a social media assistant with alumni relations. She’ll be compensated until April but worries that she won’t be able to find another job in her field after that, as companies may not see marketing as their first priority anymore. “Even from an entrepreneurial standpoint, if I wanted to run social media, run marketing for companies, no one’s really worried about that right now, which is concerning considering we don’t know when [the outbreak] is going to end,” she says. “Right now, I know that I’m qualified enough to get a position, but it’s the issue with the job market in general. I’m of scared for what’s going to happen in April.” Shields says one of the challenges of this recession that predating the outbreak is “the nature of the labour market has shifted quite significantly.” According to Shields, there

has been an increase in jobs that move away from what academics refer to as “standard employment,” that is, “full-time jobs that have a high degree of security that usually come with benefits and [protection through unions].” Those sorts of jobs have become rare as employment is growing in what he referred to as “precarious work.” According to Shields, precarious work entails “work that is short term, part-time jobs, [and] contract positions that are term limited, with no guarantee that they will be extended beyond a specified period.”

A recession is a part of the necessary cycle of our economy This is very similar to the type of self-employment Thomson had considered, as well as freelance which is also a type of precarious work that Shields says will be quite different in terms of what student’s parents, and certainly grandparents would have faced when entering the labour market. Having a guaranteed job after graduation is something Thomson has seen her peers attain from working at companies beforehand. For herself, and many others working in student positions at a university, that opportunity isn’t something that can be offered. “The fact that I don’t know what’s happening after that last day for career boost...it’s making me anxious, because I can’t see my future.”

ILLUSTRATION BY JAMIE STRAND

Horizontal 2. Snake coding language 4. ______ Sidewalk Labs project could turn TO into Blade Runner 6. What is the other biggest crisis right now, apart from the pandemic? 8. Where are all your classes right now? 9. Ryerson attempts to separate itself from companies with ties to fossil fuels through __________

Vertical 1. PoWEr hOUse oF tHe CeLl :/ 3. Protecting your computer with a baseball bat 5. What’s the name of the dating app for Ryerson students? 7. A browser extension you should uninstall

arts & culture

when we’ll no longer

cross the street Poem by Andrea Josic

Post-exam summer playlist

The Earth re-inherits its kin Shadow lends itself to yesterday’s pavement We can go where we like again A hand can swallow a two-metre distance In this second life Sky so clear we can see our reflection in the neighbour’s sweat Wink at anybody with carnival lashes Neglect denses the two tongues Now together Envious of the way a rind can peel “I” becomes everything that belongs to us Fear tastes different when expected But we no longer cross the street when the sidewalk narrows How desperate are the fingers that shake And the heel that is left for desire Longing is unrecognizably familiar but we run beside each other That time will be afterthought A restaurant call bell still sounds the same A crowd will be adrenaline candy Wane along anything that looks like the old shell A new normal is quiet Unconditional

ILLUSTRATION: JULIA MLODZIK

By Rhea Singh As sunnier days begin to roll around, so does the end of the school year. The Eye put together a playlist that makes you excited for social distancing summer, going to the spacious Trinity Bellwoods and hanging out with friends at a sixfoot distance. “Perfect Day” - Lou Reed “Perfect Day” is the song for when you’re fantasizing about laying on the grass, cracking open a beer and spending hours outside in warmer weather—or actually doing it, again, with a six-foot distance between you and your friends!

become your

er at very own skat

“Fancy Footwork” - Chromeo “Fancy Footwork” is self-explanatory—it’s perfect to play when you’ve got the “I miss partying” blues. Call your friends, get them on FaceTime or Zoom and enjoy a dance party in your separate rooms. “Dancing On My Own” - Robyn Robyn will make you reminisce about spending time with the people you love going out or dancing with. So play this, dance around in your house and call your friend and talk about what you’re excited for in the summer. Warmer weather is going to do great things for us.

culture page! Welcome to the arts &

e you your very ue in isolation, we mad iss al fin ial ec sp r ou evo r Fo annel your inner Lake D ch to in ur lo co to d ar own skatebo pefully— tting pavement on—ho hi e th e in ag im st Ju r. skate ld and Victoria streets. newly constructed Gou

itor, Rhea Singh Love, arts & culture ed

“Hope” - Blood Orange, Diddy, Tei Shi Listen to this song while cleaning your room, on a walk, catching up with relatives and friends or getting ready for the next school year. This is also your go-to summer song if you plan on taking summer classes. It will push you through those quizzes, exams and lectures that you can’t wait to be done with so you can enjoy your summer, and you’ll remain hopeful that this will all be over soon.

Baby Blue’s - King Krule King Krule makes those online lectures a little more tolerable thanks to “Baby Blue’s” soft beats. And if you missed the lecture, play this in the background while you catch up on slides. Summertime Magic” - Childish Gambino How to describe “Summertime Magic”? It’s a trip to the beach or going thrifting in the west end. With all the cancelled plans and flights, listen to this song when you plan your late but still great travel plans. “Yo Perreo Sola” - Bad Bunny Even if you can’t go around the city dancing to the song, you can do it from the comfort of your own home. Translating to ‘I twerk alone’, this song is perfect for social distancing. “Always Forever” - Cults If you want to have an e-girl moment, listen to this song and do some Euphoria makeup with all the free time you now have or sit on a fire escape looking into the distance wondering when your e-boy/girl in shining black eyeliner will come save you from isolation. “Bottoms Up” - Trey Songz ft. Nicki Minaj If you have TikTok (which, at this point, I don’t know what to say if you don’t) you’ll know Nicki’s part of this song by heart. Start the song at 2:25. “September (Earth, Wind & Fire)”- K.K. Slider This is a song you have to go the extra mile for since it’s not on Apple Music. Visit YouTube for the Animal Crossing renditions. “Don’t Go Outside” - Poppy Just, please, for the sake of humanity and getting this over and done with, don’t go outside.

Which Ryerson icon are you? Ryerson is absolutely iconic. Every day that you step onto campus is a thrilling experience—you never know what to expect. Skater boys demanding the Gould Street foot traffic to move out of the way, business students working away on some life-changing pitches, rats scurrying about chaotically, startling anybody within a one-metre radius. Have you ever wondered what kind of Ryerson icon you are? Take this quiz to find out!

Quiz by Catherine Abes Illustrations by Jimmy Kwan Design by Andrea Josic

Do you have a startup in your mom’s basement?

How active are you on Ryerson Facebook pages?

Facebook is for seniors

START

I’m the admin of several pages

Where are you from?

Toronto

Yes

What’s your favourite nightclub?

“Toronto” (The GTA)

Dance Cave How often do you get your hair cut?

Never, man

All the time, have to be clean-shaven

Rebel

What song do you play when you’re in your feelings?

“Crawling” by Linkin Park

“Cruise” by Florida Georgia Line

What program are you in?

Nibble, nibble

I don’t go to Ryerson

Congratulations, you’re a rat! You’re literally a rat that lives under Gould Street, occasionally making an appearance above ground to remind pesky students who really owns this city. You’re greasy, powerful and a little rough around the edges. Now that campus is closed it’s only a matter of time before the uprising begins. Scamper free, legend. a pandemic advice column for the Ryerson rats with itchy noses!

My nose is itchy, but I can’t touch my face. What do I do? By Andrea Josic I’m sure this is frustrating, so let out a blood-curdling scream. That will alert your synapses that danger is imminent and your brain will immediately expect the end. When it doesn’t arrive, you will descend into a sweet, cathartic release of pure relief and ecstasy. Realistically speaking, you could do this once a day until the quarantine is over, and even after it’s over—if only to fully realign

yourself. Once you have your emotions under wraps, you will transcend euphoria and be able to levitate with your new and improved consciousness. Upon opening your third eye, you will realize that you no longer belong to the shell of your body and that your soul must complete the journey it was meant to. If we aren’t actually real and this dimension isn’t real, your itch isn’t either.

Congratulations, you’re a Lake Devo skater boy! Never-ending construction won’t stop you from ripping it across Lake Devo and almost running students over. With your plaid shirt, wide-legged Dickies, rugged vans and small beanie that barely touches the top of your ears, you’re way cooler than kids these days. You may want to consider wearing a helmet though given you aged out of your parents’ health insurance a decade ago.

Congratulations, you’re a TRSM student! Other Ryerson students don’t get you— probably because you exclusively wear suits from Moore’s and they don’t. They’re jealous because your startup will definitely make you the next Bill Gates and your stock portfolio is much more diverse. Not to mention your calves are twice the size of anybody else’s because you choose to walk up the stairs of TRSM. You may not have gotten into Rotman or Schulich but you are closer to the downtown core and that “makes it easier to find a 9 to 5.”

The Eyeopener Class of 2020 A particularly unhinged cohort

EMMA SANDRI, NEWS

“Sorry, who, what, where, when, why?”

JIMMY KWAN, PHOTO

MADI WONG, NEWS “AH AH AHHHH”

PERNIA JAMSHED, PHOTO

SARAH KRICHEL, EDITOR-IN-CHIEF

“i think we ALL type loudly”

VALERIE DITTRICH, NEWS

ELANA EMER, PHOTO

ALEXANDRA HOLYK, NEWS

“Ukrainian Jesus camp puts the CULT in culture”

KHALED BADAWI, PHOTO

“all i know how to do is be a gemini, write news, eat hot chip and lie”

“Goodbye everyone, I’ll remember you all in therapy.”

“I will never get the Slack notification sound out of my fucking head”

FUNKÉ JOSEPH, ONLINE

KOSALAN KATHIRAMALANATHAN, ONLINE “Did you ever notice that Jesus died in a T-pose?”

“The best calves in the game, 21 years running”

ZACH ROMAN, ONLINE

“I’m so swol now. Thx 4 the memories.”

“I have cried in every corner of the office. I’ll show u pics”

CATHERINE ABES, FEATURES

SHERINA HARRIS, FEATURES “Show me your credit card statements #WhoWouldaThought?”

“Fine motor skills are small movements mostly associated with the hands.”

“can we have class war outside today”

“Hang on, let me take out my AirPods. I forgot The Franchise is in a different tax bracket than y’all”

NATHANIEL CROUCH, BIZ & TECH “Why won’t you guys let me play ‘Tequila’ in the office?”

DHRITI GUPTA, COMMUNITIES

KIEONA GEORGE, COMMUNITIES “The worst thing about The Eyeopener was the dementors.”

“my baptism was a real turning point in my life”

ANDREA JOSIC, FUN

CONNOR THOMAS, MEDIA

PARNIKA RAJ, MEDIA

RANEEM ALOZZI, MEDIA

LIANE McLARTY, GENERAL MANAGER “This may come as a surprise but that was bullying & you did not fix it with your response.”

CHRIS ROBERTS, ADVERTISING MANAGER “Real strength has to do with helping others.”

“You will be bored of him in two years and we will be interesting forever.”

“I can read.”

“no talk me im angy”

“‫—ﻛﻠﻜﻢ ﻣﻌﻔﻨﻴﻦ‬it means ‘I love you’ in English. But really, I do. Salam #NotMe”

“It’s so fun being an e-boy Clark Kent”

RHEA SINGH, ARTS

watercolour by Catherine Abes

TYLER GRIFFIN, ARTS

LIBAAN OSMAN, SPORTS

“God does not roll dice.”

J.D. MOWAT, DESIGN DIRECTOR “Shut the fuck up”

hi friend!

SEE YOU SOON - The Eyeopener