DEVIL’SLASTDANCE
SamCrescent
Copyright©2024
Antwone,TheBoss,satatthebarsippinghischeapwhiskeywhilelisteningtohiscellphoneringconstantly Hedidn’t evenneedtocheckwhothecallerwastoknowitwashisbrother,Draven.
His brother was married, had two children, and Antwone was happyfor them. After all, he’d beenthe one to help manipulatethingsandsetitupsoDravengotthewomanhewanted.Itwastheleasthecoulddo.Hisbrotherhadsavedhislife, kepthimsafe,andthenputhimonthethrone,makinghimTheBoss.
Menlookedtowardhimtorule,tocontrol,todoeverythingthatneededtobedone
Butbecauseoftheirpast,secrets hadtobekept.Noonecouldknowtheywerethebrotherswhoweresupposedlykilledbytheirenragedfather.
Runninga hand downhis face, he cutthose memories off, because theyweren’timportant He and Dravenhad fixed thoseproblemsyearsago,andanyonewhodaredtoblackmailthemwastakencareof.Itwasalotofhardwork,andAntwone wasmorethanpreparedforit.
Buttherewereafewoccasionswhenhejustwantedtohaveanicedrinkwithoutthetroublesthatkeptknockingathis door.Northepainthatcamewithknowinghewasalone.
Beingatthetophadagreatdealofperks Helikedhavingpeopleafraidofhim,andforgoodreason Therewasatime hisfathercalledhim“weak”anda“pussy.”Notbeingabletokillanimalsmadehimpatheticinhisfather’seyes.Antwonestill refusedtokillanimals,butwhenitcametopeople,hewasmorethanhappytohurt,hunt,torture,andgetwhathewanted
There was a monster inside him a beast. Manycalled Draventhe devil, buttheybothknew who the real monster was.
Antwonelookedatthesmallamountofamberliquidinthebottomoftheglassandfinisheditoffinonegulp Ittasted vile,andwasnothinglikethegoodstuffheloved.
There was a time he didn’tdrink There was a time he didn’tdo a lotofthings, butknockingatdeath’s door after a beatingfromyourfatherchangesyou.
Over the years, Draven had told himhe’d changed Antwone tried to laugh it off as nonsense, but he knew it was bullshit.Hehadchanged.Yearsago,awoman’spleaswouldresultinhimbeinglenient,showingmercy,butnow hesaw the deceitandbetrayal.ItwaswhatmadeMaria,Draven’swife,soverydifferent.Shehadknownherfamilywasgoingtobetray him,butshe’dcometohim
Mariawasthelastwomanhe’dshownmercy.Thatwasfiveyearsago.
“Areyouallright,honey?”asoft,beautifulvoiceasked
Antwonelookeduptoseeablonde,blue-eyedbeautystandinginfrontofhim.Therewasnomakeuponherface,and herlonghairhadbeenpulledbackintoaponytail.Ifhedidn’tknowbetter,he’dbelievehergazeheldconcernforhim.
“Morethanfine.Justarefill,”hesaid,shovinghisglasstowardher. Shegrabbedhisglass,thewhiskey,andrefilled,placingitbackinfrontofhim.Heknewshekeptaneyeonhim. Antwonedecidedtolookherintheeye Hehadcometolearnthatstaringbackatpeoplemadethemnervous,andthey oftenlookedaway.This woman,with Candice onher name tag,didn’tlookaway.He didn’tknow ifshe was brazenor just plainstupid
“Tellme,Candice,whatareyoudoinginthisbar?”heasked. Herbrowswentupjustanotch,andthenshepursedherlips.“Iworkhere.That’swhatI’mdoing.”
“Abeautylike youworkinghere? Please, youcould have your choice ofa life.” He was prettysure there would be manymenliningup,willingtogiveherwhateverherlittleheartdesired.Allsheneededtodowasclickherfingersandthey’d beputtyinherhands
Insteadofbeingcharmed,sherolledhereyes.Nottheresponsehewashopingfor. “Doesthatlineworkoneveryone?”sheasked Hetutted.“Mostwomendon’tneedmuchelse.”
“Nice.Insultingmysexwhileyou’reatit.That’sprettygood…”Shesighed.“What’syourname?”
“Wouldn’tyouliketoknow?”heasked,winking
Thiswas…refreshing.Ithadbeenalongtimesincehehadtalkedtoawomanwhodidn’tknow whohewas.Ifshe did,therewasnowayshe’devenbetalkingtohimwithdisrespect Helikedherattitude Itwasnice
Shewipeddownthebar,andhecouldn’thelpbutwatchher asswhentherewasanother customer whoneededtobe served Hedidn’ttakeasingledrinkashewasmoreentertainedbythewomaninfrontofhim Shegottheguyhisdrink,took thepayment,andhandedhimthechange.
Again,shecleanedthebarandthenmadeherwaybacktowardhim.
“Ihaven’tseenyouherebefore,”shesaid “Areyoulost?”
“Notlost.Justaguywantingadrink.”
“Yeah,youlooklikeaguywho’sdrowninghissorrows Lostatthetables?Putabetdownthatdidn’tgoyourway?” sheasked.
Antwonecouldn’thelpbutlaugh.“Don’tgamble.” “Really?”
“You’resurprised?”
“Lookaround you, sweetheart. There are a lotofmenhere who are drowningtheir sorrows because theylostatthe races”Candicefoldedherarmsacrossherchest,andthenpursedherlips “Brokenheart?” “No.”
“Wifegivingyoutrouble?”
Heliftedhisdrink.“Idon’thaveawife.”
“Really?”
Antwonecouldn’thelpbutchuckleagain “Anothersurprise,Isee”
“Ifiguredyou’dbemarried.”Sheshrugged.“Youlooklikethekindofguywhohasitallfiguredout.”
“Thanksforthecompliment So,isthereahusbandwaitingforyou,Candice?”heasked Sherolledhereyes.“Nah,nospecialsomeoneforme,thankyou.”
Thisdidsurprisehim “Areyoulyingtome?”
“Youmaybeastrangertome,butno,I’mnotlying.I’msingle.Trustme.It’sagoodthing.” “Ah,haveyouswornoffallmen?”
Sherolledhereyes “It’snotlikethat Let’sjustsayI’vehadabadexperienceandleaveitatthat” Hedidn’twanttoleaveit.Hewantedmoreinformationandashestaredather,Antwonefoundhimselfcuriousabout thiswoman Inallhislife,hecouldn’trecallawoman,notevenhisbrother’swife,talkingtohimsofreely Mostofthewomen inhisworldwerevyingforhisattention,wantingthestatusofmarryingTheBoss.
“So,ifyou’renotmarried andyou’reclearlydoingwellintheworldbythelooksofthesuit whyareyouhere, lateonaFridaynight,drinkingalone?”
Hiscellphonebuzzed.
“Ignoringyourcalls?”sheasked “It’scomplicated.”
“Mostthingsinlifeare,”shesaid,sighing “You’retotallyright,though Igetit It’snicetojustgetawayfromallthe shit,isn’tit?”
Antwonesmiled.“Yeah,itis.”
Hewatchedasshegrabbedthewhiskeybottle,steppedtowardhim,andpouredhimanotherglass.
“Onthehouse,”shesaid.
Hedidn’tgetachancetothankherasshewasalreadymovingawaytodealwithothercustomers
Hiscellphonedied,butthenwasimmediatelyaglowagainwithDraven’snumberlightingupthescreen.Itwouldbeso easytoignoreit,butifhecontinuedtodothat,bloodwouldbeshedasDraventriedtofindhim,expectingtheworst Clicking thegreenphoneicon,heplacedthecalltohisearandwaited.
“Antwone,speak,orsohelpme,Iwillmakeyousuffer.”
“Whatcouldyoupossiblyneedfrommerightnow?”Antwoneasked “You’realone.”
Hehadevadedhisguardsforareason “Gettothepoint”
“Damnit,Antwone,youknowthethreats.Ourenemies ” “Arealwaysoutthere,andIknowhowtodealwiththem Trustme,Draven Icantakecareofmyself”
Hisbrotherhadbeentakingcareofhimforlongenoughnow.Itwastimeforhimtostop.
Heknewhowtohandlehimself.He’dshedenoughofhisenemies’bloodtoknowhowtotakecareofeverything.There wasnomercyinhim Noonewouldeverbesafewithhimaround
AntwonewatchedasCandicesmiled.Shewasabeautifulwomanandhersmilewassosweet,buthealsosawnoother manpaidhertoomuchattention Theywantedtheirdrinksandtodrowntheirsorrows
He had no idea whatmade himwalkinto this bar. He didn’tevenknow the name ofthe place, justthathe needed a drink,someprivacy,andthisplacehadlituplikeabeaconforhim
CandiceSwifthatedthedark.Itwastheonedownsidetoworkingatnight onlythestreetlightstoofferanykindof protection Steppingoutontothe street,she wrappedherselfupinher jacket Itwas onlylate September,butitwas already cold.Theyweregoingthroughoneofthosestrange,earlyfall/winterthings.Onedayitwasfreezingcold,thenexttoastywarm. Shepulledouthermittensandslidthemonherhands.
“Cold?”
Thesuddenquestiondirectedclosetoher ear hadher screaming.Shequicklyspunaround,hands clenchedintofists,
notthatanyonewouldseethem,astheywerealreadycoveredbyhermittens.Shewassurprisedtoseetheguyfromthebar theonewithoutawifeorgirlfriendwhohadn’tlostatsomegamblingventure.
“Hello,Candice,”hesaid
Keepingherfistsraised,shefrownedathim.“Youdorealizethisistotallycreepy,right?” Hefrowned “How?”
“Youwaiteduntilclosing,andyoustartledme.I’mgettingalittlebitofacreeperviberightnow.”
“Ah,Isee Iwantedtothankyou”
Shestilldidn’tlowerherfists,butshecouldn’thelpbutbeintrigued.“Youwanttothankme?” “Yes.”
“Whatfor?”
“Forhelpingme,andIalsowishedtoofferyouaridehome,orwecanwalk.”
“I’mnotgettingintoacarwithyou,”shesaid “Ah,okay.”
Itwas strange, because this manwas indeed a stranger, and yetshe wasn’tafraid She didn’thave anoverwhelming feelingtomakearunforit.
“Youcanwalkwithme,but…Ineedtoknowyournamefirst.Youknowmine.”
“So,Candiceisyourrealname?”
“Yes,”shesaid.
“Antwone”Heheldhishandout
Shelookedatitforseveralseconds,thenheldherhandouttowardhimandshookit.“Nicetomeetyou,Antwone.”
“ThishastobethestrangestmeetingI’veeverhad,”hesaid.
“Well,consideritamemorableone.”Shepulledherhandbackandshoveditintoherpocket.“Youdon’thavetowalk mehome.Iliveabouthalfanhourfromhere.Nottoofar.”
“Ihavemycar”
“Stillnotgettingintoit,andIshouldwarnyou,IhaveMaceaswell.”Shehadnoideawhyshetoldhimthat.Hecould beanattacker,andnowshehadjustwarnedhim
Again,itwassostrange,butshedidn’tfeelhewasdangerous,whichwassoweird.
“Then,howaboutwestartwalking?”
Shelookedathiminhissuitandnoticedhewasn’twearingajackettowardoffthecold. “Areyounotcold?”
“Nope”
Candicefoundthathardtobelieve,butshewasn’tgoingtoarguewithhim.Ifhedidn’twanttowearajackettokeep himselfwarm,thatwasonhim
“We’regoingthisdirection,”shesaid,pointinginfrontofher. “Leadtheway.”
Andsoshedid,forseveralsteps,andshecouldn’thelpbutstealglancesinhisdirection Hekeptasmalldistancebetweenthem,buthekeptpacewithher.Shewasusedtowalkingfast,andshekeptmoving, notwantingtoslowdown Hedidn’tcomment,didn’tcomplain Juststayedbyherside Shetookadeepbreath,expelledit,andthencouldn’thelpbutglancehiswayagain.
“Doyoulivearoundhere?”sheasked “Yes.”
Hedidn’tsayanythingmoreandafterabriefpause,shenodded.
“Theweatherisconfusing,huh?”
Antwonechuckled.“Theweather?”
“You’renotexactlymakingmylifeeasier You’reastranger,andI’mtryingto youknow befriendlyanddothe rightthing,beniceandmakeconversation.”
“Conversation?”
“Isthisastrangeconceptforyou?”sheasked. “Indeed.”
Shechuckled Shejustcouldn’thelpit “You’reaconfusingguy,Antwone” “Thankyou.”
Again,shelaughed Yes,itwasweirdtohaveastrangerwalkingherhome,butitwasalsokindofnice Shefeltsafe Thereweren’tmanypeopleonthestreetslateatnight.Therewereacoupleofpeople,someofthemdrunk,othersjustworking, ordoingwhatevertheydid.
“Whatdoyoudo?”
“Whatdoyoumean?”heasked.
Thishadtobethestrangestconversationsheeverhad.“Youknow,forajob.Whatisyourcareer?”
“Whydoyouwanttoknow?”
Candicesmiled “Well,youalreadyknowwhatIdo Iworkinabar I’mmakingpoliteconversation Youknow,rather thanthesilence.Ithelpstokeepthings…light.”
“ByknowingwhatIdoforaliving?”heasked
“Youknow,thewholegettingtoknowoneanother,talking,thatkindofthing.It’swhatpeopledo.”Sheglancedoverat himashestoppedwalking
“I’minbusiness,”hesaidafterasecond’spause.
“You’reinbusiness.”
“Yes”
“Okay,whatkindofbusiness?”
“Multiple I’mabusinessman Iowncasinos,restaurants,andIalsoinvest”
“Ah,okay.Soundslikeahectickindoflife,andIbetit’snoteasy.”
Antwonestaredatherforseveralseconds
“What’swrong?”sheasked.
“Didyoualwayswanttoworkinabar?”
“Nah,Iimaginedowningmyownbusiness Iwasgoingtobeamultimillion-dollar pancakemaker,or somethinglike that.” She laughed, recallingher ownchildhood innocence. “Trust me, mypancakes are the bomb, but not everyone is into pancakes Somepeoplelovewaffles,butIdogreatwafflesaswell”Sheshrugged
Thetruthwas,shedidn’tdowellatschool.Sheunderstoodeverything,butshedidn’ttestwell,sotherewasnocollege educationforher.Afterherparentspassedaway,shesoldthehouse,movedtothecity,andeverythingelsewashistory.
Atthirtyyearsold,she’dseenalotoftheworld,learnedalotaboutpeople,howhardandcruelsomecouldbe.
Ithadtakentime,butshelikedherjob,andthenshegottodowhatshewantedduringtheday.Shemadeenoughmoney topaythebills,withabittospendonluxuries,andshedidn’thavemuchcareintheworld Her parentshadlefther enough money,whichshehadsaved.
She never lived outside ofher means Her parents had always taughther the value ofonlyspendingwhatshe could afford.Therewerenospendingspreesinherfuture.
“Youlovetocook?”heasked.
“Yeah,Ido.Everythingtastessomuchbetterhomemade.Iremembermymomusedtospendhoursinthekitchen,every Sundaymorning.She’dbakebread,cookies,muffins,bars,andtreatsfortheweekahead.OneFridayeverymonth,we’dgoon aginormousfoodshoppingspree,andwe’dspendthatSaturdaypreparingitall She’dmarinatemeattostickinthefreezerfor thewholemonth,whichwasawesome.We’dmakeburgers,differentkindsofmeatballs,sometimeswe’devenmakethemeals aswell”Shesighed,recallingthefondmemories
“Soundslikefun,”hesaid.
“Itwasalotoffun.Thereweretimeswhenifwehadtoomuchfood,we’dcookwhatwehadandthentakeitaroundto neighbors Myfamilylovedthewholecommunityspirit”Shesighed
Itwasmomentslikethis,whenshethoughtaboutwhather parentsdid,thatshewishedshehadn’tleftthesmall town whereshe’dgrownup
But,thatwas theproblem thememories.Shehadtriedlivingandgettingby,butithadbeentoopainful.Everyone wassonice,butshefoundherselfconstantlyintears,feelingsoaloneandmissingthem
Comingtothecityhadbeenlikeabreathoffreshair,whichwaskindofodd,consideringsomeofthecongestionand theconstantfumes.She’dbeenabletofinallyheal,butthegriefwasalwaysthere.
She had her mother’s cookbooks, all her notebooks, not just on food, but everything she did Her mother was an amazingknitter,andCandicehadlearnedfromher.Shehadthepatternshermotherhadkeptovertheyears,includingsomeof herowndesignsaswell Theywerethememoriesshewantedtokeepandsavor
“Whataboutyou?Anymemoriesyoucaretoshareaboutyourparents?”sheasked.
“No”
Hesoundedsocold,sohard.Candiceregrettedaskinghim.
“Oh,ofcourse.”
Silencefellbetweenthem,andshekeptwalking
Thismanwascertainlydifferent.
Antwonesataloneinhishome,staringupattheceiling Hewasdrinkinganotherglassofwhiskey,onlythisonewas verydifferentfromtheothershehadbefore.Thisonewasexpensive.Itwasanicedrink.
HetriednottothinkaboutCandice.Shehadnoplaceinhisthoughts.Ithadbeenthreedayssincehehadwalkedher home threedays,whenhehadbroughttheconversationtoaclose.Hetookalongdrinkofhiswhiskey,finishingtheglass.
Heshouldhaveknownhisbrotherwasgoingtomakeanappearance.
Dravendidn’tknockonthedoor,butstormedintohisofficeasifheownedtheplace Technically,asfarasAntwone wasconcerned,hedidownhalfofeverythingthatwashis.IfDravenwantedit,hecouldhaveit.
“Whyareyounotansweringmycalls?”Dravenasked “Busy.”
Draventooktheemptyglassfromhimandputitdownonthetable.
ThecalmerDravenappeared,theangrierhewas “Whatthefuckisgoingonwithyou?”Dravenasked “Ihavenoideawhatyou’retalkingabout.”
“Cutthecrap,Antwone YouandIbothknow you’vegotsomeproblems”Dravenpacedinfrontofhimandthensat downonthecoffeetable.“Talktome.”
Antwonesighedandlookedathisbrother “Whatistheretotalkabout?” Dravenranfingersthroughhishair.“Tellme.”
He leaned forward and stared into his brother’s eyes. “There is nothingwrong. Shouldn’tyoube athome withyour wifeandkids?”
Hisbrotherstoppedandlookedathim.
Antwonestaredrightback Hedidn’thaveacareintheworld “Isthatwhatthisisabout?”Dravenasked.
“What?”
“I’veheardtherumors,Antwone.Iknowwhatpeoplewant.”
Antwoneburstoutlaughing.“Ifyou’regoingtostartpayingattentiontoalltherumors,brother,wearefucked.”
“Theywantyoutogetmarried Theywantyoutosettledown,haveacoupleofkids,andforeverythingtoberosesand allthatshit,”Dravensaid.
Antwonestoodupandhewasabouttomakehiswayovertowardthedrinkasheneededanother Dravenstoppedhim,puttingahandonhischest.“Don’tdothis.”
“What?Haveadrink?Please,IthinkI’veearnedadrink,haven’tI?”
“Cutmeoff.Don’tdothis.Don’ttreatmelikeI’moneofthem.”
“Ah,buttoeveryone,you are oneofthem,Draven,”hetutted.“YouandIbothknowthat.Haveyouagreedwiththem? Areyoualreadyliningupmyvirginwife?Asuitable candidate”Hewrinkledhisnoseattheverythought Hehatedallthings todowiththetradition.
Forthepastfiveyears,heheardthewhispers,thesuggestionsthatheneededawifeandtoproduceanheir Nothaving thatstatuswasstartingtomakehisclaimasTheBossweak.
He knew the men his capos were trying to prepare their daughters to be his wife. All of them were young, nineteenortwenty,childreninhiseyes.Antwonewasn’tinterestedingirls,neverhadbeen,evenasayoungman.Healways wantedawoman.
Healsodidn’twanttodealwithavirgin Dravenhadgottenavirgin,butAntwonedidnotwantone
Again,histhoughtswenttoCandice,theyoungwomanhecouldn’tgetoutofhishead.
Hecouldn’thelpbutwonder ifher blondehair was natural or not Threedays ago,hehadseenher toher door,then walkedbacktohiscarandgonehome,whereDravenhadbeenwaitingforhim.
Inthepastfewmonthshisbrotherhadappearedtoconstantlyberatehim,anditwasgrowingalittlethin.Antwonedid all his duties, dealtwiththe business, keptpeople inline, and was always presentfor the parties The fear ofhimwas still firmlyinplace.
Hecouldnolongerstandtheinvitestopersonaldinnerparties,whereyounggirlswerepresentedtohimasiftheywere suitablecandidates.Hejustwasn’tinterested,butheknewdutycalled.
Runningahanddownhisface,helookedatDraven Heowedeverythingtohisbrotherandhadpromisedthatwhatever Dravenneeded,hewouldgivehim.Thatwaswhyhe’dshownmercytoMaria.
“Isthatwhatthisisabout?”Dravenasked.“Marriage?Havingchildren?” “It’smorethanthat,andyouknowit” “Whatareyouafraidof?”
Antwonecouldn’thelpbutlaugh “YouthinkI’mafraid?”
“Ifyou’renotafraid,thenwhatareyou?”Dravenasked.“Letmehelp.”
“There’snothingyoucando.Weallknowthevulturesarecircling…whattheyexpectofme.”HepushedpastDraven andwenttohisdesk,butthenmovedstraighttothewindowandlookedoutatthegarden.
“You’retheboss,Antwone Whatyousaygoes Youdonothavetotakeanyoftheirdaughters,oranyofthatshit” Antwonelaughed.“YouthinkIcanmakeitupasIgoalong?”
“Whynot?”
“Iseemtorecallgoingtoabarafewdaysago,andyoublewupmycellbywantingtoknowwhereIwas.”
Dravenrolledhiseyes “Thatwasforyourownprotectionandyouknowit” “Ah, butthatis the point. Youknow Icantake care ofmyself, butIcannothave a few minutes to think. To plot. To plan.”
“Isthatwhatitwasaboutandnottryingtoescape?”Dravenasked “WhywouldItrytoescape?There’snoreasonformetofearanything.”
TherewasabriefpausebeforeDravencontinuedtospeak “Whatareyouplotting?Whatareyouplanning?”
Thetruthwas,fuckall.Itwasplainandsimple,Antwonewantedabreakfromallthebullshit.BeingTheBosswasn’t exactlywhathe ever had planned After Dravenhad saved himfromtheir father, and theywentinto hidingmanyyears ago, he’dhopedtoneverlookbackatthislife.
Draven’s planoftakingover and rulingthe veryorganizationthatprotected and admired people like their father felt likeamazingrevenge Now,though,Antwonewishedforsomethingverydifferent “Whyareyouhere,Draven?”Antwoneasked.
“You’remybrother,Antwone”
“Yes,webothknow this,asdoesyour sweetwife,butwealsoknow wemustkeepthingsprofessional.Now,Ithink it’stimeyouheadbackhome.Thiswasagoodchat,anddon’tworry, brother,Iwon’trunoffagain.Ipromiseyou.I’ll stay hereanddomyperfectduty.”
“Damnit,Antwone,don’tdothisshit,please.”
Hewavedhishand “Goandfindmeawife Godowhatyoufeelisbest”Antwoneknewhewasbeingaroyalprick, butrightnowhewasn’tinterestedindutyoranyofthatshit.
“Doyouthinkthat’swhatIplantodo?Findyouawife?”
“Ihavenoideawhatyou’regoingtodo,andIwon’tevenattempttounderstanditeither,”Antwonesaid.
“YoudoknowthatIonlycareaboutyou,right?Thishasnothingtodowiththefamilyoranyofthatfuckingbullshit.” Dravenwalked over to himand gripped the backofhis neck. “You’re mybrother. Iwill always have your back, and ifyou don’twanttodoanyofthatshit,thenyoudon’t.I’llmakesuretheylisten.”
AntwonegrippedDraven’sneckandplacedhisheadagainsthisbrother’s Theyhaddonethisoftenwhenthestressof everythingfeltlikeitwascrashingdownaroundthem.
“Noonewillevermakeyoudoanythingyoudon’twantto”
Theywereprettywords,butAntwoneknewthetruth.BeingTheBossinthisworldcamewithcertainroles,andoneof themwastakingcareofbusiness,havingkids,beingwitharespectedwoman.
“Youbettergo,”Antwonesaid
Dravenlookedlikehewantedtostay,buttheystillhadtokeeptheirpersonalrelationshipasecret.
HewatchedDravenleaveandthemomentheheardthedoorclickintoplace,thesilenceseemeddeafening Antwonelookedaroundhisoffice,andhefeltnothing nosmugnessorhappiness justanemptyvoidofnothing.
“You’reback,”Candicesaid,lookingatthemandressedlikeeveryotherbusinessman
TherewasonlyaslightdifferencebetweenAntwoneandtheothermensheserved.Shecaughtsightoftheringofink aroundhiswristwhenhereachedforward Thesuitdidn’tquitecovertheinkanditdidmakehercuriousastowhatitmeant Healsodidn’thavehisheadinhishands,lookingliketheworldwascrashingdownaroundhim.Ifanything,helookedsad.
“Andsoareyou,”hesaid
Thisdidmakehersmile.“Ah,butyouwill seemehereeverysingledayunlessI’monvacation.Iworkhere,babe.” Shewinkedathim.“WhatcanIgetyou?”
“Whiskey,neat”
She reached backfor the bestwhiskeythe bar had, and itstill wasn’tas good as some ofthe brands outthere. She pouredhimagenerousglassandtoldhimtheprice Hepaidrightawaywithoutgrumblingaboutinflationortheextortionofthe prices.TherewerenotmanycustomersonaTuesdaynight,soshedidn’tneedtoserveanyoneelse. “Areyouokay?”sheasked. Antwonestaredatherwithoutresponding. Silencemetherquestion.
Sheheldherhandsupintheairandgaveachuckle.“Youdon’thavetoanswer,youjustlook…sad.” “I’mnotsad.”
“Okay,you’renotsad,thenwhatareyou?” “Whydoyouwanttoknow?”heasked.
Candicehadseenmanyangrymeninhertimeservingatthebar Notonlyhadsheseenthemhere,butthroughlife,on thestreets,andevenpastboyfriends.
She shrugged and held her hands up “I was just beingfriendly Sometimes, all we need is someone to talkto, and besides, I’m no one, so you can tell me your worries and not be concerned about me spreading hateful gossip or telling someonewhatyousaid.”Shewasn’tabouttofightthemanaboutopeningup.
Leavinghimalone,shemadeherwayaroundthebar,servingdrinkstoafewofthecustomers,clearingawayglasses, andthenheadingbackaroundthebartofindAntwonestillwithadrink.
“I’mnotsad,”hesaid “I’vegotnothingtobesadabout”
Shewastemptedtoleavehimalone,buthadafeelingthisguywasn’tusedtotalkingabouthisfeelings.
“You’renotsad”
“No.”
“Thenwhatareyou?”sheasked.
Hedidn’tsayanythingbutlookedpasthershoulder Shecouldn’thelpbutwonderifhespentalotoftimethinkingover hiswordsoractions.EverythingwithAntwoneseemedverycontrolled.
“Haveyoueverhadtodosomethingyoudidn’twanttodo?”heasked
Thismadeherlaugh.“Yeah,ofcourse.Mostpeoplehavetodosomethinginlifetheydon’twanttodo.”
“Likewhat?”
Shesnorted.“Work?Yeah,Iknowsomepeoplelovetoworkandallthat.Somepeoplegetthedreamjobtheylivefor, yadda yadda yadda. But, there are those ofus who have to workto survive.” She shrugged. “There are people outthere in worsesituations,bettersituations,butsomejobsarenotgreat”Sheshrugged
“Whatifit’swithsomeone…youdon’twant?”heasked.
“You’rebeingvaguerightnow I’mnotsurewhatyoumean”Sheplacedbothherhandsonthecounterandlookedat him,figuringheneededherfullattention.
Antwonelookeddownathisglassandtookseveralminutes.Shehadafeelinghewasn’tgoingtosayanythingandjust giveherhalfastory,butthenhereturnedhisattentiontoher.
“Haveyoueverbeenforcedtobeinarelationshipyoudon’twant?”
Candicechuckled “Okay,thisseemsalittle,Idon’tknow,outoftheblue”
“Well,haveyou?”
“Nah,Imean,ofcoursetherehavebeenpeopleouttherewhostumbleintoarelationshipandthenrealizetoolatethat it’snotwhattheywant.Areyouinthatposition?”sheasked.
“No.I’mnotwithanyone,”Antwonesaid.
“Areyouaskingforafriendorsomething?”sheasked “Yes.”
ShehadafeelingtherewasmoretobesaidbutAntwonesippedhisdrink
“Youknow,youdon’thavetodrinkifyoudon’twantto.”Shereachedbehindher,grabbedaglass,andmovedtothe fridge,totakesomeofthebottledchilledwater Openingitup,shepouredhimaglass
“Ifyoujustwanttostayinthebarforthecompanyorwhateverreason,youdon’thavetodrink.”Shewinkedathimand movedawaytoserveoneoftheothermen.
Shecouldn’thelpbutlookbacktoAntwone Hewassodifferentfromthemenshewasusedto
With everyone served, glasses collected, she moved toward Antwone to see the glass of water was finished. The whiskeywasstillintheglass Shepouredhimanotherglassofwater
“So,thisfriendofyours,whenyousayforced,doyoumeanlikearrangedorsomething?”sheasked.
“Anarrangedmarriage?”
“Yes.”
Henodded.“Peoplehavetomakedecisionsonthekindofwomanhehastomarry.” “Why?”
“Thatis…tradition.”
“Andyoudon’tthinktraditionhastobebroken?” Antwonechuckledbuthedidn’tanswer.
Candicenibbledherlip.“Yousaid‘kind’ofwoman,whatdoesthatmean?”
“Shehastobeavirgin.”
Hisliptwitchedattheword.
“Youdon’tlikevirgins?”sheasked. “Notparticularly.”
“Haveyoubeenwithanyvirgins?”Candiceasked “Areyouavirgin?”hefiredbackwithaquestion.
She sighed “No, I’mnot IlostmyvirginitywhenIwas twenty-five years old IthoughtIwas goingto be withhim forever.” He was her one and onlyboyfriend. Theybroke up lastyear because Devonstarted to getmean. He worked ina corporaterole Herarelytalkedabouthisjob,butovernight,hewantedhertolearntobelikeotherwives Hecalledherthick andstupid.Thenofcourse he wouldstartonher body.He suddenlydidn’tlike her curves.She figuredatthe office she had becomethebuttofallthejokes,oratleasthehadbecauseofher.
Candice was pleasedshe never marriedhim,butthe firsttime he hither was the lasttime he hither She alsonever movedinwithhimeither,preferringherownlifeandseeingwheretheirrelationshipwent.Itwassomethingherparentshad alwaystoldher tobesureofherselfandthepersonshewaswithbeforecommittingtoanything Thatwaswhatshetriedto do.
“Butyou’renottogetheranymore?”
“Nope.”Andshewasn’tabouttotellhimwhyeither.
Shehadafeelingthis friend wasn’tafriendatall.“Iguesswhatyoucoulddoiswaittoseewhatwomantheychoose.”
“Formyfriend?”Antwoneasked,browsraised
Rather thancall himout onhis lies, she offered hima smile. “Yeah, tell himto see who theychoose. It might be a womanhecanbewith,orevenfallinlovewith”
Antwonesnorted.
“Areyouabouttotellmeyoudon’tbelieveinlove?”Candiceasked,handonherhip. “Doyou?”
“Look,I’mgettingtiredofyouavoidingtheanswers,butforyourinformation,yes,Ido.Ibelieveinlove.”
“Eventhoughyou’renotwithyourboyfriend?”
“Isawmyparents,”Candicesaid.“Andeventhoughthey’renotwithmeanymore,Isawtheirloveandyes,Iknowit’s rarebutIalsoknowit’ssomethingpreciousandspecialandsweet Thatkindofloveisoutthere,withaspecialperson”
Antwonestaredather.“Youreallybelievethat?”
“I’vewitnessedit.Haven’tyou?”
Shewaitedashelookedpasthershoulder.“Mybrotherhasit.” “See,thereisproof.Didn’tyourparents?”
“Idon’thaveanyparents”
She had a feelinghe didn’twantto be asked questions abouthis parents, so she picked up the lastofthe water and poureditintohisglass
“Thenmaybewhatyoucouldtell your friendistohavehopeandanopenmind.Thisarrangedmarriagecouldbethe bestthinghe’severexperienced.”
“Andifit’snot?”Antwoneasked “Then,makethemostofit,orevenbeforethemarriage,standupandsayno.Noonecanmakeusdoanything.It’sthe modernworld,afterall”
Thistime,Antwonedidlaughbutitdidn’tsoundlikeitwasanythingotherthanhysterical.
“Youthinkbecausethisisamodernworld,we’refreetodowhatwewant?”heasked “Iliketothinkso,yes.”
“You’readorable.”
“Well,well,well,towhatdoIowethispleasure?”Candiceasked
Antwonedidn’tsayanythingtoherthefollowingdayashetookaseatatthebar.Therewasnothingtosay.Hedidn’t knowhowheendeduphere,onlythathetookadrive,andthiswasexactlywherehestopped.
“Adrink,”hesaid.
“Scotch,beer,orwater?”sheasked.
“Thewater”
“IfIkeepseeingyouthis regularly,I’mgoingtostartthinkingyou’ve gota thingfor me.” She gave hima winkafter pouringhimaglassofwater
Sheputthelidonthebottleandplaceditbesidehisglass.
Oneofherhandsrestedonthebarwhiletheotherwasonherhip.Lastnight,hehadalsowalkedherhome,andthey talkedaboutabsolutelynothingontheway Therehadbeensilence
Heknew hetookarisk.Withall hisenemies,heshouldn’tberiskinghislifelikethis,buthefoundhimselfunableto stop Hewantedtomakesureshegothomesafely
“Isthatwhatyouthinkabouteveryguywhowalksintothisbar?”
“Nope,butnoteveryguyattemptstowalkmehome You’vegottobecareful,Antwone,Imightstarttothinkyou’rea perfectgentleman.”
Now this made himlaugh. If onlyshe knew that he had killed someone this veryday. The manhimself hadn’t been anyoneimportant,buthe’dattemptedtokillhim Anamateurhitman
Therewerealotofpeoplefromrivalgangs,aswellasmenandwomenwithinhisowncircuit,thatwantedhimdead. Thiswasnotanewoccurrence Ratherthanallowhissoldierstotakecareofit,hedid Therewasnowayforhimtogivethe sonofabitchaneasydeath,soithadtobeahardone.
Three hours oftorture to discover who had hired him Some MCganghad offered himtengrand to tryand kill him Rathermeagre,consideringwhohewas,butthen,whatdidheexpectfromassholes?So,nowtheyhadtotakecareoftheMC, whichwasn’taproblem.
Afterward,allhewantedwasadrink,anditcertainlywasn’taglassofwaterhehopedtohave OnelookatCandice, though,andhe didn’tneeda stiffdrink.He stoppedhimselffromglancingdownthe full lengthofher body,eventhoughthat wasexactlywhathewantedtodo
Shealwaysworethesamething apairofblackjeans,andablousewiththebar’slogoplacedoverherleftbreast. All that changed was her hair. Like tonight, it was pulled back off her face with two clips, whereas last night, she had it wrappedinabun.Shelookedsotemptingtohimashetookaswigofwater.
“Don’teverthinkI’mtheperfectgentleman.Trustme,I’mnot.”
“Thenifyou’renotaperfectgentleman,whatareyou?”sheasked “Youdon’twanttoknow.”
Shegavehimsuchasweetsmilethatforseveralsecondshecouldn’tdoanythingbutstareather Shewasbeautiful “Ithinkyou’rebeingalittlebitofatease.IknowgentlemenandIknowevilassholes.”
“Thenputmeintheevilassholecategory.”
Shesighedbutdidn’thaveanythingelsetosaytohim.Sherolledhereyesandwalkedawaytoserveanotherman.
Antwonelookedathershapelyass.Neitherthejeansnortheshirthidthefactthatshehadanice,roundedass.Hewas always temptedtotouchher,topull her close,andjustfeel her againsthim Hewas always abletostophimself Shewas a temptingwoman,though.
Sippinghis water, he finished the glass and knew itwasn’tthe drinkhe wanted, butCandice was there to pour him anotherglass.
“Howwasyourday?”sheasked. “Shit”
“Ah,so,notagooddaythen.”
“WhydoyouthinkI’mhere?”
Shepressedahandtoherchest.“Youwoundme.Ifigureditwastofinishoffanamazingdaybybeinginmythrilling company”
Thismadehimchuckle.“Youarethrillingcompany.”
Shewipedthebardown,liftinghisbottle,thenhisglass.“Doyouwanttotellmeallaboutthisbadday?”
“Yeah,itwasfuckingshit,”hesaid Hepickedupadrink.
“AnythingIcandotohelp?”sheasked
Antwonelookedather.“Howwouldyouhandleapossibleassassination?”Heknewheshouldn’tbeaskingherthese
kindsofquestions.Shedidn’thaveacluewhohewasorwhathedidwithhislife.Toeventellherwouldriskherlife.
He risked itnow justbyvisitingthis bar regularly. Ifhis enemies knew whyhe came here, theywould setaboutto destroyherorusehertomakehimmeettheirblackmaildemands
“Assassination?Doyoumeanlikesomeoneistryingtokillyou?”sheasked.
“Inaroundaboutfashion”Hecouldn’thelpbutsmile Shepursedherlips.“Doyoumeansomeoneinyourcompanyisattemptingtogetridofyou?”
“Yeah,likethat”
Shedidn’tneedtoknow thattherewasalwaysatargetonhisback.Shewassonaive,itwasverysweettobeinher company.Heliftedtheglassofwater.
“Isthisbecauseyou’rebetterthanthem?”sheasked
“Yep.”Afterall,heandDravenhadbeenabletogetintopower,wipeouttheircompetition,andredesignthefamilythe waytheywanted ItwaswhynoonecalledhimanythingotherthanTheBoss
“Wow,anddotheyknowthis?”sheasked.
“Yes”
“So,you’renotoneformodesty?”
“WhywouldIbemodestaboutthetruth?”
She held her hands up “Fine, fine, fair enough Well, Iguess the onlythingyoucando is eliminate the competition, right?”
“Funnyyoushouldsaythat Ido”
“Youknowyoudon’thavetodothis,”Candicesaid.
ThiswasthefourthnightinarowthatAntwonehadwalkedherhome Eventhoughshehadtoldhimhedidn’tneedto, shecouldn’thelpbutfeelrelievedeverytimehedid.Itwasn’tthatshewasafraidtowalkhome,she’dbeendoingitforyears. But,andthiswasabigbut,shelovedhiscompany Sometimestheydidn’teventalkallthewayhome Theywalkedinsilence “Iknow,butit’scoldandit’slate,andit’sdark.”
Therehadbeenseveraldrunkenmenwhoshewouldhavecrossedthestreettoavoid.
Shovingher handsintoher pockets,theyonceagainmanagedtowalkinsilence,butitdidn’tseemawkward,atleast nottoher.
“Howwasyourcompetitiontoday?”sheasked “Nocompetitionproblemstoday.Justwork.Lotsandlotsofwork.”
“Ah,sothegoodoldreliablework”Shenoddedher head Henever saidwhathedid,andshefoundthatshedidn’t needtoknow.ShehadlearnedthatAntwonewouldtellherwhenhewasready,andtherewasnoneedtorushhim.
“Doyouhaveanyfamily?”sheasked.
“Abrother”
“Oh.Areyouclose?”
“Sortof”
Again,allthevagueanswers.
“Idon’thaveanysiblings Iwasasurprisechildtomyparents Actually,theyhadbeentryingtohaveachildforyears, andthenoneday,whenmymomwaslikefifty,shegotpregnant.Ithinkitfreakedalotofthedoctorsoutatthetime.Iknow theywere worried aboutbeingmucholder parents, butIdidn’tcare how old theywere. Theywere myparents and Iloved themsomuch”Sheshruggedandsmiledjustthinkingaboutit Candicehadalreadytoldhimthatherparentsweregone Ithad droppedintotheconversationafewdaysago.
She didn’tmind tellinghimabouther life She figured she was more used to talkingthanhe seemed to be Antwone seemedtobemoretalkativeaboutnon-personalventuresthananythingelse.
Again,shedidn’tmind Itneverfeltawkwardwithhim
“Doyouwishyouhadabrotherorasister?”
“Sometimes.IknowmyparentstriedtomakesureIwaspartofeverything.Theymademegotoeverysingleinvitefor abirthdaypartyorwhatever Theydidn’twantmetomissout I’veneverbeengreatatmakingfriends”
“Andyetyouworkinabarwhereyoutalktoeveryone,”hesaid.
“Ah,butyousee,that’sthetrick Italktoeveryoneandnoone Idon’thaveanyfriends”Sheshruggedthenfrowned “Okay,nowIseeIshouldn’tbragaboutthat.I’mopenlyadmittingthatIhavenofriends.”
“NeitherdoI,”Antwonesaid.
“Ah,butthatcouldbeyourmodestyegoproblem.Noonelikesaknow-it-all.”
“Evenyou?”heasked.
“Idon’tmindaknow-it-all.It’skindoffuntowatch.”Shecouldn’thelpbutlaugh. “Areyoulaughingatme?”Antwoneasked.
“No, butdon’tyouthinkit’s kind offun? You’re a know-it-all, and I’mfriendless Maybe together we could be best friends.”Shegavehisshoulderanudge.
“Bestfriends?”
Herepeatedthewordasifitwasaforeigntermtohim.
Shesighedandthenslidherarmthroughhis,linkingthemtogether “Yeah,wecanbefriends Youknow,sharesecrets, andtelleachothereverything.Maybeevenhavesleepovers?”
“Ihavemyownbed,”hesaid.
Candice smiled “Iwasn’tbeingserious Lightenup, Antwone” She sighed and thenfelther stomachstartto growl “I’mstarving,andthere’renogoodplacestogetfoodthatareopen.”
She saw her place just up ahead and quicklygrabbed his hand before he could pull away She marched himup the street,goingtoherbuilding.Pullingoutthekeysheturnedtohimandsawhewasalittleunsure.
“Look,IcanmakeyouthosepancakesIwastellingyouabout ThatisallI’moffering,”shesaid “Pancakes?”
“Yes.That’sall.Pancakes.Youknow,food.It’swaytoolatetoeatanythingtoobigandI’msoinneedofsomefluffy pancakesrightnow”Herstomachchosethatmomenttogrowl “Whatdoyousay,bestie?”
She didn’t know why she was inviting himto her apartment. Antwone was a stranger. She never, ever, ever, ever invitedanyonefromthebartoherplace Itwasafirmandabsoluteruleofhers Justlikesheneverdatedanyoneshewentout drinkingwith,ormetinthebar.Hermotherhadoncetoldherthebestdatesweretheunexpectedoneswheretheguyremained sober.Candicehadstuckbyit.
Andsoshewaited,lookingatAntwone.
Henodded.“I’denjoysomepancakes.”
Shechuckled,turnedtothedoor,typedinthecode,andreleasedthelock Sheheldthedooropenforhimandwaitedas hesteppedintoherbuilding.Closingthedoorbehindhim,shetookthestairsleadingtoherapartment.Shewasn’tonthetop floor as she couldn’t stand heights Unlockingthe door, she let himinand immediatelyswitched onthe light, floodingher apartment.
“Comein.”
Antwoneenteredherapartmentandshenoticedhewastense.
“Areyouokay?You’renotlikeavampireoranything,expectingtobesprayedwithholywater,areyou?”sheasked.
“I’mnotavampire”
“You’reactinglikeyou’veneverbeeninvitedintoanyone’shomebefore.It’skindof,youknow,alittlescary,Iguess.” Shenibbledherlip,notexactlysurewhattosaytohim
“I’mnotusedtothis.Putitdowntomyegotalking.”
Thisdidmakehersmileandratherthancontinuetobeawkward,sheremovedherjacketanddecidedtoleavehimfree tosnoop Shemadeherwayintothekitchenandgrabbedthemilk,eggs,andbutterfromthefridge
Hummingtoherself,shegotherskilletoutandbegantomeltthebutter.Shealsowasn’tinthemoodforanythingsavory sosheaddedsomesugarandvanillaforflavor ShewasintheprocessofwhippingupthebatterwhenAntwonejoinedherin thekitchen.
“Didyouenjoywhatyousaw?”sheasked “Youhavealovelyapartment.”
Shesmiled.“It’shome,orasgoodashomecanbe.”
“Butthisisnotwhereyougrewup?”
“Nope,I’masmall-towngirl,andImovedherenotlongaftermyparentsdied.” “Why?”
“Thememories.Theyweretoomuch,andImissedthemeverysingleday.ItwashardtobewhereIhadmemoriesof them”Sheshrugged “Areyourparentsstillalive?”sheasked “No.”
“I’msosorry,”shesaid.
“Notallparentsaregoodparents Youdon’tneedtobesorry”
Shelookedathimandpressedherlipstogether.Therewasclearlynolovelostforhim.Shecouldn’timaginefeeling thatway
“Still,Iamsorry.Theywereyourparents.”
“Theyweren’tgoodparents.”
She wantedtoaska lotofquestions butdecidedtojustsmile andreturntocookingthe pancake batter.She hadalso gottensomemaplesyrupout.Pancakesalwayscalledfor lovelysweetsyrup onlythebest andtoher maple syrupwas
thebest.
“Soyouhaveabrother.Whatishelike?”sheasked,wantingtomakethetopicalittlelighter.
“Idon’ttalkaboutmybrother”Shepausedinplacingthebatterintothepan,andthenturnedtowardhim “Okay”She laughed.“Howaboutyoupicksomethingforustotalkabout?”
Shewasoutofideas
“Doyoulovetocook?”heasked.
“Yes Itremindsmeofmymom Shealwayslovedstandingatthestoveandshewasanamazingcook”Shetookadeep breath.Thepainwasstillthere,butitwasmanageable.Sheknew shewouldnevergetoverthedeathofherparents.Allshe coulddowasacceptitandtrytoliveherlife.
“Anddoyouloveworkinginabar?”
“IthelpspaythebillsandatleastI’vegotajob,soyeah,Ilikeworkinginabar.”Sheglancedoverhershouldertosee himstanding,armsfolded,watchingher
“Butisthatallyouwantedtobe?”heasked.
“To be honest, I never knew what I wanted to be At school, I never really had the smarts, and I got by and just graduated.SchoolwashardenoughandIwasn’tinterestedingoingtocollege.Lifekindofplayedoutthewayitdid,andthenI bouncedfromjobtojob,untilmyparentspassed.ThenImovedhere,foundthisapartment,thenmyjob,andlifehasjustbeen on‘play’since”
She flipped the pancakes, giving them a couple of minutes, and then grabbed two plates. She began to serve the pancakes,puttingallfourontohisplate,andthendrizzlingthemwithmaplesyrup
Shedollopedoutmorepancakesforherself.Inherkitchen,shepossessedasmalltableandsheglancedbehindherin timetoseeAntwonepullingoutoneofthechairsandtakingaseat.
He looked so outofplace, and she couldn’thelp butsmile as he satdown, and thenusinghis fork, sliced downthe stackofpancakesandtookabite.
Whenhelookedtowardher,sheturnedbacktoherpancakesandquicklyflippedthemover Itwouldn’tbelongbefore herswerecooked,andshehadenoughbatterleftovertostoreinthefridge.
She grabbed some plastic wrap and placeditover the bowl, returningitto the fridge Bythis time,all her pancakes werecooked,andshepiledthemontoaplateanddrizzledoutthelastofthemaplesyrup.SittingoppositeAntwone,hewas finishinghisplateasshestartedhers.
“Well,whatdoyouthink?”sheasked.
“I’vealwaysbeenawafflekindofguy,buttheywerestunning.”
Thismadeherlaugh “You’reinsane,youknowthat,right?”sheasked
One Week Later
AntwoneknewhehadtostopgoingtoseeCandice.Everytimehewenttoseeher,hepromisedhimselfitwouldbethe last,butsomethingkeptpullinghimback.Hedidn’tknowwhatitwas.
Eachnight, he’d sitatthe bar, nurse a glass ofwater, eventhoughhe wanted onlyscotch, and he’d watchher work. Fridaysleadingintotheweekendwerethebusiest,andherarelygotthechancetotalktoher
Hehadalsocometofindthathehatedseeingrandommenflirtingwithher.Marriedornot,theyflirtedwithher,asking for her phone number There had beena few occasions whenhe’d beenwaitingfor her thatsome ofthe menhad also been waitingtoseeherafterhours.HemadesuretheyweregonebeforeCandicecameout.Shehadconfidedinhimthatshewasn’t interestedintheirattention.Ithadsomethingtodowithwhathermotherwouldsay.Hedealtwiththemswiftly.
Dravenwasdrivinghimcrazywithhisincessantcalling Hedidn’twanttolistentohisbrother,nordidheplanto He neededtobeleftalone.
HewasTheBoss,themanincharge,yetoverthelastcoupleofmonths,hehadfeltevenmoretrapped Heshouldn’t feeltrappedwhenhewasthefuckingtopdog.Noneofthemshouldbetellinghimwhattodo,andhewasgrowingtiredofthe bullshit
Arrivingatthebar,hewassurprisedtoseethelightwasn’tlit,declaringthemopen.Themaindoorswereclosed,with asinglechainkeepingthemout.Candicewassittingonthebottomstepoftheclubandthemomentshesawhim,shestood.
“Iwonderedwhenyouweregoingtoarrive,”shesaid “What’sgoingon?”heasked.
“Thebossdecidedtocloseforthenight Herandomlydoesitfromyeartoyear Picksanightandclosestheclub”She shrugged.“Igotthecallthisafternoon,andseeingasIdon’thaveyournumberandforthepastweekandahalf,you’vebeen comingtothebar,IthoughtI’dstayheretoletyouknowit’sclosed”
“Doyouknowhowlongitwillbeclosed?”Antwoneasked.
“Aday,acoupledays,aweek,maybe.”Sheshrugged.“Noonereallyknows.Igetthecallwhenhe’sabouttoopen.IfI hadyournumber,Iwouldhavecalledyou”Sheheldherhandsup “NotthatI’mattemptingtopressureyouoranything Justto tell you the bar is closed, and there’s no point in coming down, especially if you’re coming to see me. As you can see, pointless”
Itwasn’tpointless.Hehappenedtoenjoycomingtoseeher.Glancingoverather,hesawhersweetsmile.Thatiswhat drovehimtothebareverynight.
Antwonekeptpromisinghimselfhewouldn’tgoseeher,andyeteverynight,hefoundhimselfatthebar.
Dravenhadalreadygivenhimthethirddegreeonthefacthewasn’ttakingcareofhimself,buthedidn’tgiveashit.All hecaredaboutwasseeingCandice Rightnow,beingaroundherwaseasy
“So,Idon’tknowifyouwanttoleaverightaway,orifyou’dliketogodancing.”Sheclenchedherhandsintofistsand didalittleshufflefromsidetoside
“Idon’tdance,”hesaid.
“Dinner?”
Helookedatherandsheheldherhandsup.“Asfriends.Afterall,Idon’twantyoutofeelthreatenedbymypancake ability.I’dinviteyoubacktomyplace,butthere’sariskyou’llgetthewrongidea.”
Damnit,therewasthatsmileagain Itwassofuckingsweet,andwide,andfuckingperfect Hewantedhersobadly,but hekeptthosefeelingsincheckwhenhewasaroundher.Candicehadmadeitclearshewasn’tlookingforanythingotherthan friendship,andthetruthwashe’denjoyedthepastweekandahalfwithher “Whatkindoffooddoyouhavebackatyourplace?”
“Asithappens,inmyslowcooker,Ihavetotallygotsomemeatballsandthemostamazingtomatosauceboiling.It’sa recipemymomalwaysmade Lotsofonionsandgarlic,andthey’rehomemademeatballsaswell”
“You’reeatingspaghettiandmeatballs,why?”Itwashisfavoritedish,andhecouldn’tbelieveshewaseatingit.
“Ugh, it’s the bestmeal onthe planet” She moved toward himand grabbed his arm “Come on, let’s go backto my place.” She started to move down the street, and Antwone followed, keeping an eye like he always did on any potential enemies
HehadnoideahowlonghecouldkeepCandiceasecret,buthisintentionsweretokeepherinthedarkforalongtime, ifnotforever.Shedidn’tneedtoknowwhohewasorwhathedid.Therewasnodoubtshe’dchangehermindabouthimifshe knew,andthatwasthelastthinghewanted
“Didyouhaveagoodandproductiveday?”
Antwone thought about the argument he had withhis brother Dravenwasn’t happywithhimconstantlyvanishingat night.Heneededtimeawayfromallthebullshittothinkandbehappy.Hedidn’tneedtohearthecraphisbrotherwastelling
him.Dravenhadagoodlife kids,afamily,hehaditall whileAntwonehadtoconsiderdatingawomanwhowasnothing morethanachild.
“Itwasthesamekindofday”
“Didyoueliminatethecompetition?”sheasked.
“Nottoday Ididn’tneedto TodayIgottobetheboss” “Ooh,thatsoundsawesome.”Sheheldontohisarmalittletighterandhecouldn’thelpbutglanceoverandwatchher.
Shelookedsohappy,sofree Antwonehadneverknownwhatthatwaslike EvenwhenheandDravenhadbeenable toescapetheirfather,theyhadnochoicebuttoconstantlylookovertheirshoulders,waitingforsomeonetotryandendthem.It waswhytheytookover.
Noneofithadbeeneasyfor either ofthem,buttheyhadfinallyrisentothetop Antwonehadthoughtitwaswhathe wanted,butdaybyday,hewasstartingtoseeitwasn’tquiteasfunashehopeditwouldbe.Andhedidn’thavemuchchoice inhislife Nowthattheywerearguingabouthimhavingawife,itwasfarlessenjoyablethanever Hedidn’twantthebullshit
Theyarrivedatherapartmentandlikeeveryotherevening,shetookhisjacketfromhim,hangingitupbesidehersin thehallway Herapartmentdidsmellgood
“Whydidn’tyougoforthepancakes?”heasked.
“As much as I love pancakes, and I do, I told you I was going to make a business and all that. I like variety, and besides, whenthe boss calls to informyouthere’s no work, youdon’t waste that time I had ground beef and everythingI neededtomakethemeatballs,andthat,mydearfriend,isexactlywhatIdid.”
Hefollowedherintothekitchen,andsheleanedovertheslowcookerafterliftingthelid “Comeandsmell.”
Antwone had learned it was easier to follow her commands thanto sayno. Besides, his mouthwatered, and as he steppedovertotheslowcooker,hewasprettysureheinhaledheaven.Theysmelledsogood.
Sheputthelidbackon.
“Icookthespaghettiseparately”Shehummedtoherself,andhedidwhathe’ddonethepastfewnights satdownat thetablewhilesheworked.
Shefilledapotwithwater,andhewatchedassheweighedoutthepasta Thewaterstillhadn’tcometoaboil,sosheturnedtowardhim.“WhatcanIgetyou,tea,water,coffee,wine?” “Waterwillbejustfine.”
She filledthembothtwoglasses.Candice veryrarelydrankwine andwhenshe did,itwas small bottles,where she didn’thavetoworryaboutthewinespoiling.
“Whatareyouthinking?”Candiceasked,takinghimbysurprise Sometimesherquestionsdidthattohim.Hedidn’tknowifsheintentionallydidit,orifthiswasnaturaltoher. “Whyareyouasking?”
Shesmiled.“Youdothatallthetime.Answeraquestionwithaquestion.Ifyoumustknow,it’swhatmyparentsalways did.”Sheshrugged.“Mydadwouldalwayssaythatthereasontheyhadagoodrelationshipwasbecausehegottoknow the wayhermindworked”Shepointedafingertoherhead “Momsaidthesame”Shesighed “Youmissthem?”
“Always”
Shewalkedovertothecounter,pulledoutabookthatlookedlikeithadseenbetterdays,andmovedtowardhim.
“Thisisthem”Sheopenedthebookandtherewasapictureofayoungmanandwoman,holdinghands,lookinghappy “Mommadethiscookbook,andshedidsowhilecreatingmemories.Thispicturewastheirfirstdance.Ithinktheysaid they’dbeendatingforabouttwoyearswhensheagreedtogotoherfirstdancewithhim.”
“Twoyears?”heasked
Shenodded.“Myparentstookitslow,butIalsohavetotellyouthatinthispicture,theyweresixteen.”
“Noshit,”hesaid
Candicegiggled.“Yeah,whichmeansmydadwasdatingheratleastwhenhewasfourteen.Healwayssaidthemoment hefirstsawher,hefellinloveandknewhewasgoingtomarryher”
Shemovedthepagesandhesawrecipes,combinedwithpictures.
“Therearenoneofyou,”hesaid.
“Ah,yousee,Icamelaterinlife”
Shegottoherfeetandmovedtowardasmallassortmentofbooks.Candicereturnedandopenedthepage.Thewoman andmanweremucholder,likeshesaid,butinthecouples’armswasababy
“See,”shesaid.
Flickingthroughthepages,hesawitwasabookofmemoriesandofplans,filledwithrecipes.
“Candice’swinningpeanutcookies?”heasked.
“Again,arecipemymomcreatedforme.Itwasarewardfordoingsowellonsomeofmytests.”
“Ithoughtyoudidn’ttestwell?”
“Ididn’t,sopassingwasabigdeal.”
“Ah,Isee”
Hecouldseethatshelovedherparentsverymuch.
Candice oftenpulled outthe cookbooks, so she could venture downmemorylane She loved her parents and missed themeveryday.Likenow,shewouldhavelovedtobeabletotalktohermom,toaskhersomanyquestionsandgetheradvice onAntwone.
She loved his company Every time he walked into the bar, her heart seemed to speed up, and then he’d talk Admittedly,herarelytalkedaboutanythingimportant,butitwasalotoffuntoher.Hesometimestalkedabouthiswork,butit wassovague,shedidn’tcompletelyunderstandwhathesaid Shedidn’tpressurehim,though
Notonlydidshelovehiscompanywhilesheworked,butattheendofthenight,hewashappytowalkherhome.She lovedlinkingarmswithhim
She shouldn’t be feelingthis wayabout a stranger. Although, he wasn’t so mucha stranger to her. She happened to enjoybeingwithhim, talking, gettingto know him, wantingto be near him. Theycould talkaboutthe weather, and to her it wouldbeathrillingconversation
Servingup the spaghetti, meatballs, sauce, and a nice handful ofgrated cheese, she walked over and putthe plate in frontofhim
“Pleasebekind.Thisistherecipemymotheralwaysmadeformeto…cureallills.”
“Areyousick?”heasked.
“No, notjustsickness, butwhenever Iwas feelingdownor lonely.” She picked up her plate. There were plentyfor leftovers,andshe’devenhavesomeforthefreezer.
Shetwirledsomepastaontoherforkandglancedoverathim He’dalreadytakensomepastaandsauce Nowhewas cuttingintoameatball.
“Fuckme,thatisgood,”hesaid Thismadehersmile.“Youthinkso?”
“Man,Ilovespaghettiandmeatballs.It’soneofmyfavoritedishes,butthis…”Hescrunchedhisfingerstogetherand air-kissed.“Delicious.”
Shefeltwarmfromtheinsideout.Helovedhermother’smeatballrecipe,cookedbyher.
“Also,youknowyouwerecute,right?”
“Shutup.”
“I’mbeingserioushere Youwereacutekidandturnedintoahotteenager”Hewrinkledhisnose “Okay,thatsounds weirdtosay,doesn’tit?”
Candiceburstoutlaughing.“Yeah,justabit.”
“You’rehotnow”
Shefelthercheeksstarttoheat.
“Becareful,Antwone,Imightthinkyou’reflirtingwithme”
“AndwhatifIam?”heasked.
Thishadtakenasuddenanddrasticturn Shedidn’tknowwhattosay,soshefinishedchewingonherfood Antwonelookedather.
“ThenIguessI’llhavetogetyoutodancewithme.”
Shegottoherfeet,leavingherplateoffoodandmovingtowardthesmall stereo Candicehadnoideawhatshewas doing,butwhilehe’dsaidthosethings,itdidfeellikeagoodidea.Glancingovertohim,shewalkedbacktothetableandtook hishand
“Candice?”
“Youcan’tsaysomethinglikethatandnotexpecttodancewithme”
Shepulledhimawayfromthetable,toherlivingroom.Therewasonlyasmallspacetodance.
Shelethimgolongenoughtomovethecoffeetableoutoftheway,andthenpulledhimintoherarms.Takingholdofhis hands,sheplacedthematherback,andthensheputherhandsonhisshoulders
Candicehadneverbeenonefordancinginnightclubsorbars,butshelovedtodanceinherownhome.
GlancingupatAntwoneandhowclosetheywere,thissuddenlyfeltlikeabigmistake Shewenttopulloutofhisarms, buthetightenedhisgriponher,notallowinghertogo.Tiltingherheadback,shelookedintohiseyes.Shehadnoideawhat washappening,butshedidn’tcare.
Hewassoclose,almostwithinkissingdistance.Whenhestrokedhercheek,shefeltlikeshewasmeltingagainsthim, andshedidn’twanttolethimgo.
“Tellmewhat’sgoingoninthatheadofyours?”heasked. “Idon’tknowwhat’shappening,”shesaid.
“Twothingscanhappen,”hesaid “Two?”
“One,Icankissyou,andyoudon’thavetothink,justfeel Two,wecanstopdancingrightnow,gofinishourfood,and pretendthisdidn’thappen.”Heleanedclosetoherear.“Tellmewhichonewouldyou’dliketohappen?”
Thiswasn’tfair Shelovedhisfriendshipbutthekisssoundedsogood Woulditbesohardtokissandseehowitfelt?
“Ormaybewecanexperiment.Imean,akissdoesn’thavetomeananything,doesit?It’snotlikeacontractoranything. It’sjustakiss.Twopeople,evenfriends,canshareakiss.”Shewasramblingnowandallshewantedhimtodowastellherto shutup
Hesmiled.“Youdon’twantakiss?”heasked.Antwonewenttolethergo,andsheheldontohimalittletighter. “Ididn’tsayIdidn’twantakiss,”shesaid Shefelthercheekswereonfire “Thenwhatareyousaying?”heasked.
“I Ilikeyourcompany Ienjoyseeingyou,and,er,Idon’twanttoruntheriskofanythinghappeningbetweenus” “Nothingisgoingtohappen.It’sjustakiss,toseehowitfeels.Oneteeny,tinykiss,”hesaid.
Shelikedthesoundofthat.Ateeny,tinykisssoundedsogood.
Staringupathim,shewaited,andthenshelinkedher fingers behindhis neck,wentontoher tiptoes,andkissedhim Hislipsfelthardandfirmbeneathhers.
Themomenthislipstouchedhers,shefeltlikeshewasfloating Itwasmagicalandsosweet,andsobeautiful Antwoneslidoneofhishandsupherback,goingtowardherhead,holdingontohertightly.Shemoanedandheslidhis tongueintohermouth.
Thekissdeepenedandshefeltherwholebodycometolifeinawayshedidn’tthinkwaspossible.Shemeltedagainst him.
“You’resofuckingbeautiful,”hesaid,whisperingthewordsagainstherlips
Thekisswasamazing.Therewasnodoubtaboutit.Shelovedfeelinghishandsalloverherbody.Shejustlovedhim holdingherandshedidn’twantittostop
Butthen,theybothbrokeawayfromthekissandlookedateachother.Candicedidn’tknowwhathewasthinking,nor didshewantto.Hislipswereslightlyredandsheknewwithoutevenlookingatherown,theywouldbethesame. Theystaredateachother.
Waiting.
But,theirfood
Antwoneclearedhisthroatfirst.“Ithinkourfoodisgettingcold.”
Andjustlikethat,itwasabucketofcoldwaterthrownoverthemboth “Yes,ourfoodisgettingcold.”
Theywalkedbacktothetableandthemusicwasstillplaying.ShetookaseatandAntwonesatopposite.
Thekisskeptreplayinginhermindandshecouldn’tgetitoutofherhead Herlipstingled,asdidherbody Itwasonekiss,butsheknewshewantedtorepeatitagainandagainandagain.
“Whereareyou?”Dravenasked
“Why?”Antwoneoftenignoredthecall,buttonightforsomeoddreason,he’dansweredhisbrother’scall.
“Why?You’reaskingmewhy?Damnit,youinsultedRafebynotshowingupathisdinnerinvitation.Whatthefuckis yourproblem?”
“Firstofall,RafeLorenzois afirst-gradeasshole.Youknow as well as Ithathe’s attemptingtosell offhis younger daughtertome We’retalkingasixteen-year-oldgirl,Draven”Hewrinkledhisnose “Thatdoesn’tmeanyouhavetochooseher.”
“She’s the onlyvirgininthe family Youand Ibothknow that, and I’mnotlookingto have a teenager or a two-year engagementeither.”
“Look,wecanhandlealltheinsultingshit.Igetit.Youdon’twanttobetoldwhattodo.Youneverhave.We’lldeal withthewholemarriagething Ipromisedyouwe’dsortthisouttogether,butIcan’thelpyouifyoukeepmakingenemies”
“I’mnotmakingenemies.IcalledaheadandcanceledwithRafe.Trustme,Iknowmyresponsibilities.”
“Thenwhereareyou?”
“Noneofyourbusiness.”
“For fuck’s sake You know we’ve had sightings of our enemies We’ve got the Bratva wanting to take turf, not to mentionourMCproblem,andallthepettycriminalsthatwouldlovetotakeyourplace.You’regotnoguards,nosoldierswith you.”
“I don’t need them You’re worrying too much, and even if I was to stay home or have dinner at Rafe’s, the same problemswouldstill bethere.Rafeisnotexactlyahappyman.Hisonlyinterestistakingmorepowerover theothercapos, and ifIwas to marryhis daughter, that’s exactlywhat he’d expect It’s not goingto happen Iexpect he’d poisonme for a chanceatthetop.”
Dravensighed His brother knew he was right Inthe lastfive years, theyhad to deal witha lotofshit Infact, the wholetimetheyhadcometopower,therehadneverbeenadullmoment.Antwonehadknownthereneverwouldbe.Theway hisfatheractedwhenhewasalive…therewasalwayssomeonewantingtotaketheirplace.
“Idon’twantanythingtohappentoyou,”Dravensaid “Nothingisgoingtohappentome.I’mdoingsomething,okay?Don’tworryaboutit.”
“Andifyou’reattacked?”Dravenasked
“I’llhandleit.Imayhavesoldierstokeepmesafe,butIalsohavemyself.Iknowhowtohandleit.Don’tstressout.It won’thelpwithyourlooks.”
ThisdidmakeDravenchuckle.
“HowisMaria?”heasked.
“She’sdoinggood”
“Andthekids?”
“Maybeifyoucameandsawthem,you’dseeforyourself”
Helookedatthebardoor,andsawitwasopen.Antwonehadbrokenalotofrulesandhe’dgivenCandicehispersonal cell phonenumber.Theonlyother persontohavethatnumber wasDraven.Everyoneelsehadhisbusinesscell number.She hadcalledhimearlierthatdaytolethimknowthebosstoldherthebarwouldbeopen.
For the pastfew nights,he hadbeengoingtoher apartment,andshe cookedfor him.The bar hadn’tbeenclosedfor long,buttheyhadn’tkissedagainlikethefirstnight
“I’llcomeandseeyouthisweekend.”Hetriedtoseehisfamilyasmuchaspossible,whilealsokeepingthefaçadethat Dravenwasn’thisbrother
Hedidn’tgiveDravenareasontokeeptalkingashehunguphiscellphoneandputitinsilentmode.Heknewitwas goingtopissDravenoff,buthedidn’tcare.
Steppingintothebar,hesawitwasonceagainaslownight Therewerealwaysacoupleofmen,sometimeswomen, butthatwasrare.
HewalkeduptothebarandsawtherewasalreadysomethingdifferentaboutCandice Inallthetimehe’dknownher, shehadneverwornherhairdownforwork.Thepastcoupleofnightsshehad,andhelovedthelengthofherblondehair.
Hesatatthebar,andsheglancedoverathim Therewasasmileonherlips,butitdidn’tquitereachhereyes,orat leasttheoneeyehecouldsee.
Shewalkedtowardhim,andhesawthatshedidn’tseemtomovetoofast.
“Youcame,”shesaid
“Youcalled.”Hedidn’tlookawayandkeptstaringather,wonderingwhatwasgoingon.
“WhatcanIgetyou?Water?Scotch?”
“Whyareyouhidingonesideofyourface?”heasked.
“Idon’tknowwhatyou’retalkingabout.Waterorscotch?”
“Candice…”Hestoppedhimselffromarguingwithherashesuddenlyrememberedhismother.Shewouldoftentryto hidebruises Itwastheonlytimehisfatherwouldpermithertowearherhairdown Ifhehadbeatenhertoobadly,shewould stayinherroomandpretendshedidn’tfeelwell.
“I’llhaveawater”
She nodded,turnedtothe fridge,andhe kepthis gaze onher,waitingfor the rightopportunity.She pouredhimsome water andas she reachedouttoputthe water infrontofhim,he struck He grabbedher wrist,nottootightly,justenoughto holdher,andthenhepushedherhairoffherface,andsawthatCandicewastryingtohideabruisedeye.
Antwonehadseenenoughofthemtoknowthecauseofablackeye.Hehadevencausedalotofblackeyeshimself.It wasn’tsomethinghewasproudof “Whothefuckdidthat?”heasked.
Angerfloodedhiswholebody
Shepulledherhandawayandtriedtohidethebruisingonherface.“It’snothing.Pleasedon’tworryaboutit.”
Hesawherhandshakeasshetriedtohideit
“Wasityourlandlord?”heasked.
“Antwone,letitgo.”
“No, I’mnotgoingto letitgo Unless youtell me rightnow thatwas the resultofsome kind ofchickfight, I’mnot lettingitgo.Irefuse.”
Shesighed “Please,it’snothing Ipromise”
“YouandIbothknowit’snotnothing,sowhydon’twetrythisagain?SomeonelaidtheirhandsonyouandIdon’tlike it.”
Candicenibbledherlip.Noonehadcometothebar,soshecouldn’tmakeanyexcusetorunorhide.Hewasn’tgoing tolethergowithoutfindingoutthenameoftheassholewhohaddonethis.
Hefelttheneedtocausewar,tospillblood Whoeverhaddonethisnowhadatimelimitonhowlongsheorhewould last.
“Look,Idon’twantyoutofreakout,okay?Itwasmyex,Devon Hecamebythisafternoon Hewantedtotalkandto behonest,Iwasn’tinterestedinwhathehadtosay.We’vebeenbrokenupforalongtime.HeneverlikedthatIneverwanted tomoveinwithhim.Irefusedtogetridofmyapartmentandmylife.Whenitwasover,itgotalittleugly.I’venotseenhimin months,sohimturningupatmyapartmenttodaywasasurprise.Westartedarguingandwell…thishappened.”Shepointedat herface.“Itwillneverhappenagain.”
“Yourex,Devon?”heasked “Yes.”
“Whatishislastname?”
Sherolledhereyesbutshegaveit.“Please,don’tworryaboutit.It’snothing.”
“You’vegotablackeye,whichmeanshehityouwithenoughforcetomakeitbruisequickly.”
“Iknow,Iknow,it’sjust it’sover” “Doyoulovehim?”Antwoneasked.
“No Idon’tlovehim Hewasanasshole”Shesmiledathimandtookhishandinhers “Itwill befine Trustme It doesn’thurtawholelot.”
Hedidn’tlikeit Itmaynothurtalotrightnow,butforDevon,itwasgoingtohurtahellofalotmore “Howmanytimeshashehityou?”heasked.
“Oncebefore.ThatwaswhenIendedit.Pleasedon’tworryaboutit.Icanhandleit.”Shegavehimasmile.“I’mglad you’rehere”
Andthensheliftedhishandtoherlipsandkissedhisknuckles. Hedidn’twanttolethergo Buttherewerepeopletoserve.
CandicewassurprisedwhenDevonshowedupatherapartment She’dbeensodistractedwiththoughtsofAntwone, shehadn’tevengivenathoughttowhowasknockingonherdoor.
Theapartmentbuildingwassecuritycontrolled Devonmusthavestillhadakeyandacode,butshenevergavehima keytoherapartment,justtothemaindoorsohewouldn’tfreezehisassoff.Nowshewishedshehadn’t.
Devon had refused to give her the key card back this afternoon. She didn’t know what to do about it. If she told Antwone,shehadafeelinghe’dbepissedoff,andshedidn’twanthimgettingintotroublebecauseofher.
TheyhadgottenintoanargumentbecauseDevonclaimedtohavemissedherandwantedherbackinhislife.Whenhe
hadtriedtokissher,she’dpushedhimaway.Shedidn’tloveorwantDevon.Thelasttimehehitherandabusedherverbally hadbeenthefinalstraw.Shewasnotgoingtofallforamanwhowasnasty.Devonwasmeanandcruel.
Whenshetoldhimitwasnevergoingtohappen,hehadgottenviolent Thelasttimehehitherhadbeenaslaptoher face. This time, he’d punched her inthe face, and thenkicked her inthe ribs. Nothingwas broken, justsore. Atleast, that’s whatshehoped
Glancingover at Antwone as he sat drinkingwater, she couldn’t help but wonder what was goingonhis mind. He lookedlikehewantedtocommitmurder,whichwasaveryscarythought Hedidn’tneedtoworryaboutanything Devonwasgoingtostayoutofherlife.Eventhoughhehadkickedher,whenhehadtriedtodoitagain,shehadlashed outandpunchedhiminthedick.Whilehe’dstruggledtogainhisbreath,she’dgrippedthebackofhisheadandpulledhimout ofher apartment The restofthe afternoonhad beenspentwitha bagoffrozenpeas againsther eye The swellinghad gone down,butAntwonewasright,hehadhitherhard.
Shefinishedservingthefewmenthatcametothebar Shekepthereyecovered Thebossofthebarhadwantedtosend herhome,butsheknewAntwonewouldbeheretonight.Shepromisedtokeephereyecoveredsoshecouldkeepworking.
Candice knew she was his best worker, and he was reluctant to let her go She breathed a sigh of relief when he relentedandallowedhertostayandwork.Itwasn’tbecauseshewantedtowork,buttherewasAntwone.
Shewalkedovertohim.
“Pennyforyourthoughts?”sheasked “Youshouldneverbewithamanwhobeatsyou,”hesaid.
She rolled her eyes “And Ipromise you, I’mnotwithanysuchman” She reached over and tookhold ofhis hands withinhers. “Devonwasn’t always mean. Yes, Itookhis insults. He didn’t always like havinga curvygirlfriend, and then aroundhisbuddies,hefeltIwastoothickandstupid.”
“Candice,thisisn’thelpingme.”
“Iknow,but…youneedtounderstand.Themomenthehitme,itwasover.ThisisthefirsttimeI’veseenhiminalong time IfItellyouthatafterhekickedmeintheribs,Ipunchedhiminthepenis,doesthathelp?”
“Youdid?”
“Yeah,and thenIused his hair to draghimoutofmyapartment I’mnotproud ofit Myparents always told me that violencewasnottheanswerbut ”
“Therearetimesit’snecessary,”hesaid.
“Yeah,andIwantedDevonoutofmyapartment.”Shesighed.
“What’sthematter?”heasked.
“It’s nothing Ijust youknow, he has a keyand the code to the mainbuildingand he wouldn’tgive itback” She shrugged.“I’llgetitbackonewayortheother.”
“Doeshehaveakeytoyourapartment?”
“No.”
“That’sgood.”
Shestareddownathishands “Tellme,howwasyourday?” “Busy.”
“You’realwayssovague” “Icanceledadinnertocomeseeyou,”Antwonesaid. “Youdid?” “Yeah.”
“Wasitimportant?”sheasked,takenabackthathewouldcancelsomethingtoseeher. “Somewouldsayitwasimportantandcouldpossiblychangemylife”
Sheletgoofhishands.“Thenwhatthehell areyoudoinginthisbar?Youneedtogotothatdinner.Youcan’tallow yourselftomissopportunitiesbecauseofme”Shewouldn’tallowit
Antwoneshookhishead.“ItwouldchangemylifeinawayI’mnotreadyfor.Idon’twanttochangemylife,Candice.” “Youdon’t?”shefrowned “Youknowtherearetimesyousaystuffthatdoesn’tmakeanysense”
Heshrugged.“It’sagift.”
This made her laugh. She didn’tknow whatitwas aboutAntwone, buthe seemed to know whatto sayto make her happy
Todayhadbeenfilledwithmixedemotions.
“Well,ifyoudon’twantwhateverchangestheyintendtomake,thenI’mgladyoucametoseeme” “Trustme,youshouldbe.”
Hefinishedhiswater,andsherolledhereyes,grabbingthebottletopourhimmore. Therestoftheeveningwentbywithoutevent.Thebarclosedandlikeeveryothernight,Antwonewaitedforher. She’dgrownsocomfortablearoundhim.Sheclosedthedistancebetweenthem,slidingher armintohis,andholding
himas they started to walk to her apartment. For the first ten minutes, neither of themspoke. The silence wasn’t tense or awkward,justpeaceful.
“Isthishowyouimaginedyourlife?”heasked “Whatdoyoumean?”
“Workinginabarlateatnight,walkinghomewithacustomer?”
Shegiggled.“No,notatall.”Shesighed.“Ididn’timagineaworldwheremyparentsweren’tinit.Isawmyselfliving inmyoldtown,maybewithahusband,acoupleofkids,goingtoseethemeveryday
Havingbigcookingsessions withmy mother.”Shesighed.“Butthisisprettygood.”
“Youwantedtogetmarriedandhavekids?”heasked.
“Yeah,Idid IknowmyparentswantedtohaveabigfamilyandIwasthesurprisetothemlateinlife IguessIwanted toalsohaveabigfamily.IknowatbigeventslikeThanksgivingandChristmas,Easter,andbirthdays,shewantedtohavebig familypotlucksandstufflikethat Therewasonlythethreeofus She’dsometimesinviteafewneighbors,whichwascool,but youknow,thatwasnotoften.”
“Doyoustillwanttogetmarriedandhavekids?”
Candiceglancedupathim.Shedidn’tknowhowtoanswerthatquestion.Didshewanttohaveafamily?
“Yeah,IthinkIdo.”Shetookadeepbreath.“Lifeiseasynow.Ionlyworryaboutgettingtoworkandpayingthebills, but attimes,itcangetlonely”Shetriednottothinkabouttheloneliness
Thereweredayswhenthebarwasclosedoverthefestiveseasonswhereitfeltcrushing.She’dgointothecitytoshop andshe’dseefamiliesenjoyingtheirtimetogether,anditcreatedayearningdeepwithinher
“Doyouwanttohavekidsandafamily?”sheasked.
TheyarrivedatherapartmentandsheletAntwonego,afraidofwhathisanswerwouldbe.
Sincethekisstheyhadshared,shehadfeltattimesitwastheelephantintheroom.Shehadn’tkissedordoneanything otherthanholdhisarm.Theyhadn’tevenhugged,andtoherthatfeltinnocent.
Hedidn’tanswer,notuntilshegotintoherapartmentandclosedthedoor Everyothernight,hewenttothekitchen,but notthistime.
“Myfatherwasn’tagoodman Hewasfuckingevilandthemorehurthecaused,thehappierhewas”Shewaspressed againstherclosedandlockeddoor.Antwonetookasteptowardher.“Iknow hisbloodrunsthroughmyveinsandforalong time,IdecidedIwasnevergoingtohavekids.Iwasnevergoingtoruntheriskofanychildsufferingbecauseofme.”
Shehadafeelinghisrelationshipwithhisfatherwasn’tagoodone.“Justbecauseyourdadwashorrible,doesn’tmean you’dbeabadone.”
“ButifIdon’triskit,thenitmeanstheywillalwaysbesafe”
“Buttheywillneverbeborn,Antwone.Takeyourfatheroutoftheequation.Doyouwanttohavekids?”Shestopped, lickedherlips “Tohaveafamily?”
Helookedintohereyes.“Betweenyouandme,morethanyouknow.”
FindingDevonwasn’thard
Antwonehadagreatdealofcontactswhoweremorethanhappytogivehiminformationwithoutaskingquestions.He paidthemtherightprice,andhe’dalsohelpedthemoutofbadsituations.Theirloyaltytohimwasabsolute.
ItwashowhewasabletolocateDevon.Candice’sexwasapieceofwork.NotonlyhadhehitCandice,andhedidn’t believeitwasonlyonce,butthemanlikedtohirepiecesofass.Themanvisitedmanybrothelsandaccordingtosources,he paidtoslapwomenaround,beatthemup,andthenfuckthem
The man lived a double life as a respectable businessman by day, and by night, he was a piece of scummy shit. Antwonehadalsogoneandvisitedafewofthewomenwhohadbeenpaidtotakeabeating
Devon never used the same woman twice, and there was a long line of victims. Most of the women had said they deserved itbecause theywanted the money. He didn’tgive a shitaboutthat, buthe had also gottenaccess to their medical records Someofthewomenhadsufferedbrokenbones,whichdidn’tsitwellwithAntwone
Now, as he looked at a hung-upside-down Devon, the man was completely naked and covered in his own urine. Antwone’sguardsdidn’tknowwhatDevonhaddone,buttheyalsoknewnottoquestionhim
HehadnodoubtDravenwasontheway.Hisbrotherseemedtohaveeyesandearseverywhere.Antwonedidn’tgivea shit Hewasriddingtheworldofapieceofshit
Devonkeptcrying.
Afterseeingthemedicalrecordsandlisteningtothewomendescribetheirexperiences,hehadsimplygivenDevona tasteofhisownmedicine
The womenwere notallowed to fightback. Iftheydid, theydidn’tgetpaid, so theyhad to take the beatinghe gave them
Devonwascurrentlycoveredinbruises.Theremightalsobeafewbrokenbones,butAntwonewasn’tadoctor,sohe lookedathishandiwork Devonwassobbing
“Please,pleaseletmego.”
Antwonetutted.“Butdidyouletthewomengo?”HecroucheddownsothathewasfacetofacewithDevon.Theman stunkofhisownpiss “BecauseIthinkyoudidn’t”
“Ialwayspaidupfront.ItoldthemwhatIwanted,andtheywerealwayswilling.”
“Ah,butyousaidyou’dslapthemaroundalittlebit Younevertoldthemthebeatingyouwouldgivethem,orthefact you’drapethemafterward.”
“They’refuckingwhores.It’stheirjobtotakecock,”Devonsaid.“Youcan’trapethefuckingpaid.”
Antwone pulledouthis knife andlookedatDevon,whobegantoshake andtrytogetoutofthe chains thatheldhim upside-down.
“WhataboutCandiceSwift?”heasked Devonfroze.
“She’snotawhore”
“Whatever thatbitchsaid,she’s lying.Shedoesn’tknow whatshe’sfuckingtalkingabout.She’sathick,stupidbitch. Please,youhavetolistentome.”
“Thick,stupidbitch.So,shedeservedthebruiseyougaveher?”
“Antwone!”
Dravenhadsteppedintothewarehouse
“Allofyou,leave,”Antwonesaid.
Noonearguedwithhim,andsecondslater,heturnedtofindDravenwastheonlyoneinthewarehouse Hewasn’thappy.
“DoIneedtoknowwhotattled?”heasked.
“Ididn’tneedanyonetotattle Ihavewaysoffindingoutwhatyou’redoing”Dravenlookedtowardtheman “What areyoudoing,man?”
Antwonetutted “Ifyouhaveyourwaysoffindingshitout,whydon’tyoualreadyknowabouthim?”
Draventookasteptowardhim.“He’ssomeonewhohasgottenonyourshitlistbutIdon’tknowhowhehasgottenonto it,otherthanbypissingyouoff”
Antwonelaughed.“Hedoesn’tneedtohaveanyotherreason.He’sscumandhe’sgoingtodie.”
Hedidn’twaitforDraventostophim.Heheldtheknife,walkeduptoDevon,andwithoutacareintheworld,heslit theman’sthroat
Inthebackofhismind,hesawthebruiseonCandice’sface,andthenhesawallthosewomen.Devonwasescalating. Itwouldn’tbelongbeforeheendeduphurtingher,orevenkillingawoman Antwonedidtheworldafavor
Wipingthebloodoffhisblade,hesliditbackintoplaceandthendumpedthesoiledclothonthefloor.Theyhadpeople
tocleanupthiskindofshit.
“DoesCandiceknowwhatyou’redoing?”Dravenasked. ThismadeAntwonefreezeashelookedtowardhisbrother
“You’reright,IhavemymeansofgettingwhatIwant,anditdoesn’ttakeageniustorealizeacertainblondehasyour attention”
“Youkeepheroutofthis.”
“I’mguessingthat’sthebastardthatgavehertheshinershecurrentlyhas” Antwonetensedup.“Howdidyouknow?”
“CandicehadadeliveryofflowerstodayandIgotthechancetomeether.”
Antwonethrewhimselfathisbrother,grabbinghimbythelapelsofhisjacket “Whatthefuckdidyoudo?”
“Ididn’tdofuckinganything,butareyougoingtoslityourownthroatoneday?”Dravenasked. Hefrowned “What?”
“Shedoesn’thaveafuckingcluewhoyouare,doesshe?Shedoesn’tknowyou’retheheadofthefuckingfamily,that you’rethebastardboss”
“Youstayawayfromher.”
“Andhowareyougoingtoprotecther?”Dravenasked.
“Noonewillharmher”
“Themomentyoushowedaninterestinher,youputheratrisk.”Dravenshovedhimaway.“Don’tyoufuckingseeit?I wasabletofindherandgetclosetoher Whileyou’retryingtoavengeher,Icouldhavealreadyslitherthroat”
“Youbetternottouchher.”
Dravengrabbedthebackofhisneckandpressedhisheadagainsthis.“Listentome,brother,Iwouldneverhurther,but thinkaboutwhatyou’redoing.You’reatargetandeverysecondyouspendwithher,you’reputtingatargetonherback.Either endit,orbringherintothefoldandtellherthetruth.”Hepulledaway.“Becauseifyoudon’t,you’regoingtoregretit.”
Antwonewatchedhisbrotherasheleftthewarehouse Secondspassed,thenminutes Heknewitwasariskbeingnear Candice.Thatonenightinthebarshouldhavebeenthelast,buthecouldn’tgetthestunningblondeoutofhishead.Heliked her,anddidn’twanttoriskhurtingher Hewouldhavetoleaveher
Thecleanersarrivedandthatwashiscuetoleave.Hesteppedoutofthewarehouseandlookedtowardhismen. “Go,”hesaidtothem.
Hewalkedbacktohiscar,climbedbehindthewheel,andbeforetheygotthechancetofollowhim,hepulledoutofthe warehouse.
TheonlywaytokeepCandicesafewastoneverseeheragain Hepressedhisfoottothegas,andtheverythoughtof neverseeingheragainfilledhimwithpain.
Helovedtoseehersmilingface,thewayshegrabbedhisarmtoholdontohim Therewassomuchhelovedabouther, andhedidn’twanttolosethat.
Runningfingersthroughhishair,hefeltaragehehadn’tfeltbefore.BeingTheBosswasnotwhathewanted.Hedidit becausehewasgoodatitanditwaswhatDraventoldhimtofuckingdo,butthatdidn’tmeanhelikedit Farfromit
Beforeheknewwhathewasdoing,hepressedhisfoottothegas,andwithintwentyminutes,hewasparkedoutsideof Candice’sapartment
Antwoneknewhehadtoleave.Shedidn’tdeservethis.
He climbed out of the car and went to her door He didn’t expect her to answer the buzzer and when she did, he hesitatedforseveralminutestotellheritwashim.
“It’sAntwone,”hesaid.
“Comerightup”
Shesoundedsohappy.
Antwonedidn’tthink Heopenedthedoorandmadehiswayuptoherapartment Candicewasalreadywaitingforhim She was ina pair of sweatpants and shirt. Her blonde hair was downand cascadingaround her shoulders. She looked so temptingandhejustcouldn’tresist
Pullingherintohisarms,hesteppedintoherapartment,kickingthedoorclosed.Thiswasgoingtobethelasttimehe sawher,andhewantedtoexperienceeverythingwithher.
Itwas unexpected to hear Antwone’s voice. Candice couldn’twaitto see him, eventhoughtheyhad parted ways the previousnight.Whenhereachedforher,shehadnoideahewasgoingtokissher.Thatonekisswaseverything,especiallyas hesteppedintoherapartment,kickedherdoorclosed,andthenwalkedwithherbackintoherapartment.
“Whereisyourbedroom?”Antwonesaid.
Candiceknewshehadtwochoices.Tellhimnoandaskhimtoleave,ortakehimtoherbedroom.
Neitherofthemhadtalkedabouttakingtheirrelationshipfurtherandeventhoughshewasalittlenervous,shetookhold ofhishandandledhimthroughtoherbedroom
Her mother had once said thatone dayshe would find a man, and eventhoughitmightseemimpossible, she would know she was doingthe rightthing She barelyknew Antwone, butshe knew deep inher heartthatshe was doingthe right thing.
Steppingintothebedroom,shelookedupathimandthenreachedforhisjacket Hecapturedherwrists,stoppingher fromtakingoffhis clothes,buthe lether goonlylongenoughtotake holdofthe edge ofher shirtandpull itover her head, tossingittotheside.
Nibblingherlip,shewatchedashetookcontrolandbegantoremovehisownclothes Shenoticedheplacedthejacket onthefloor,butremovedhisshirtwithvigorandtosseditontopofhisjacket.Hewascoveredinink.Shehadseenglimpses ofit,hidingbeneaththecuffsofhisshirt,butthiswasthefirsttimeshehadseenitall Reachingout,sheplacedherhandonhis chest.
Hepulledhercloseandtherewasnowastingtimeasheflickedthecatchofherbra Sheletoutagaspasheheldherto him,nakedchestagainstnakedchest.Itfeltsogood.
“DoyouhaveanyideahowlongI’vebeenwantingtodothis?”heasked.
“No”
“SincethefirstnightImetyou.”Hestrokedhercheek.“You’resobeautiful.”
This made her smile “You’re notso bad yourself” Slidingher hands up and around his neck, she pulled himdown, kissinghim.
Hereleasedagrowlandsecondslater,hethrewhertothebed,butthistime,hewentstraightforhersweatpants.She wassurprisedathowquicklyhecouldremoveherclothes.Allshehadonwasapairofpanties,butAntwonewasn’tputoffby that.Heswipedthemoffherbodyasiftheywerenothing.Shewasprettysuresheheardthemtear,butshedidn’tcare.
Amoanescapedher
Antwonespreadherthighsopenwideandshewatchedhimgroan.Heranhisfingersupherlegs,andthenheldthemin place Shehadnoideawhattoexpect,butwhenhemovedincloser,sheheldherbreathasheclosedthedistanceandputhis mouthonherpussy.Thetouchwassounexpectedthatatfirstallshecoulddowasgasp.
He moved his hands to the lips of her sex and as he swiped his tongue around her clit, he continued to tease her, strokinghistonguebackandforth,makinghermeltandacheformore.Slidingdowntoherentrance,shecriedoutashepushed histongueinsideher,butthendrewbackupandfocusedonherclit.
Candicecouldn’tbelievethis was happening,butthen,shealsocouldn’tbelievetheyhadwaitedthis long Toher,it feltlikeshehadknownhimherwholelife,whichwascrazy.Thiswasjusthowhemadeherfeelaroundhim.Thisdidn’tfeel wrongtoherandashepushedhertowardanorgasm,shedidn’tthinkshewouldgooverthatedge Antwonewasamasterwith histongue.
Thepleasurebuiltandshecouldn’tholdbackanymore.Screaminghisname,shecamehardandfast.Heletgoofthe lipsofherpussytopressahandtoherstomachtokeepherinplaceashecontinuedtoravishherpussy
Moaningandwhimperingfor more,hewasn’tgoingtolether go.Toher surprise,withinminutes ofthefirstorgasm, shecameagainhard
“Please,please,please,”shesaid.
Antwonedidstop,buthemovedupthebed
She didn’t know how he managed to do it, but his pants and boxers were gone. He was rockhard and she felt the thickness betweenher legs. He pressed the tip againsther slit, and whenhe bumped her clit, she was still so sensitive. She criedout,butitwasn’tinpain Itwasalmosttoogoodforhertohandle
“You’resofuckingbeautiful,”hesaid.“Idon’twanttohurtyou.”
“I’mnotmadeofglass There’snowayyou’regoingtohurtme”
Shewatchedashereachedbetweenthemandgrabbedhiscock.Hemovedtheheaddown,goingtowardherentrance, andsheheldherbreathashepoised,andthenbegantothrustinsideher
Atfirst,itwasjustoneinch.
Thenasecond.
Hewasnotsmall
Thismanwaslarge.
Ifhe’dnotbroughthertoorgasmbeforepenetratingher,shehadafeelingitwouldhavehurt
“You’resofuckingbeautiful,”hesaid.
Hekeptsayingthosewords.
Candicestaredintohiseyesandwasunabletolookaway.
Half of his cock was inside her and he moved his hand frombetween their bodies. He took hold of her hand and
pressedthemeithersideofherhead,pushingthemdownagainstthepillows.Themomentshewasheldinplace,shefelthim tenseandthenhethrustthewholeofhisdickinsideher.
Shescreamedatthesheersizeofhim Hewassobiganditwasamixtureofpainandpleasure Itfeltamazingandshe didn’twanthimtostop.
Antwone obliged, as he beganto fuckher He started outslow, his thrusts makingher ache for more, and thenas he begantobuild,hewentfaster,andthatseemedtomakehimharderanddeeper.
Thesoundoftheirfleshandbreathingechoedoffthewalls “Iknewyou’dfeelfuckingperfect.”
Candicehadnoideahefeltthisway.Shehadwantedhimaswell,butfriendshiphadseemedthebestforbothofthem. Anothermoanescapedher Shecouldn’tbelieveitwashappening,butshefeltthatpleasurebegintobuildonceagain “I’mgoingtocome,”hesaid,lettingoutagrowl.Shewhimperedhisname.
She didn’t want it to stop, but as he thrust inside her one final time, she felt his release as well as her own He collapsedagainsther,hisarmssurroundingher.Sheheldontohim,knowinginherheartthiswastherightthingtodo.
Candicewantedtotellhimshelovedhim,thatshehadbeenfallinginlovewithhimoverthepastfewweeks,butshe didn’tsayanything.Instead,shejustbaskedinthemoment.
Therewouldbetimetotellhimhowshefelt.
The followingday, Antwone stared downathis personal cell and saw Candice’s number litonthe screenagain He keptstaringatit.
Last night had beenincredible. He’d beenwithher three times, and eachtime he had hoped to workher out of his system,butheknewitwasn’tgoingtohappen.Candicehadalwaysbeenspecial,andnothingwasgoingtochangethat. “Areyouokay?”Dravenasked.
Antwonedidn’tanswer He’dsnuckoutofherapartment
Allhehadwashismemoriesbutheknewhewasdoingtherightthing.Hehadtoallowhertoliveherlife.Beingwith himwouldputherlifeindangerandhecouldn’tallowthat Hetookadeepbreath,endingthecall,andturnedtoDraven “Yes,I’mokay.”
HewasgoingtoignoreCandice.Hiscrazinessofvisitingthewomanwasover.Thethreefuckshe’dgottenfromher wereallthatwouldhappenbetweenthem Itwasover.
Candicefelttearsfillhereyes. Heendedthecall.
Therewas nolong,drawn-outringtone,givingher theoptiontoleaveavoicemessage Justanendedcall Wouldhe blockhernumber?
Shesatonhersofaandlookedacrossthelivingroom Fallingasleepinhisarmshadbeenmagical Shelovedbeingin hisarms,justasshelovedgoingtobedwithhim.Thatmorning,she’dwokenup,andAntwonewasgone.Therehadbeenno signofhimevenenteringherapartmentapartfromhermemories,andtoher,inthatmoment,itfeltevenmorecruel
Whyhadhedonethat?Shedidn’tforasecondthinkofhimasanasshole,notlikethis gettingwhathewantedand thatwasit,over.
Candice pressed her lips together, feelingthe tears build She knew itwasn’tjusta coincidence thathe’d ended her call.Antwonewasdone.
Shedroppedhercellphoneandgottoherfeet,pacingthelengthofhersittingroom
Fine.Itwasfine.Itwouldbefine. Thatwasallshecouldhope.
One Month Later
Candicelookeddownatthestickandfeltevenmoresicktoherstomach. Thiswasn’tfair.
Onemagical nightwithAntwoneandshehadbeenamassivefool onsomanydifferentlevels.Hehadusedherfora goodtime,andshe’dbeensofooledbyhisperformance,shehadn’tevenaskedforprotection,andnowshewaspregnant.
Thiswasnotwhatshewanted Shedidn’tknowwhatthehelltodo
The pastmonth, she had watched the door ofthe bar, hopinghe’d walkinand all her doubts would be exactlythat doubts,butnotfounded
Whatwasshegoingtodowithachild?
Reachingforhercellphone,shehadspentmanynightsstaringatAntwone’snumber,hopingtodeleteit.Sherefusedto call him,butshehadn’tbeenabletobringherselftodeletethatnumber Shestaredatit Wouldheevenwanttoknow ifshe waspregnantwithhischild?
Nibblingherlip,shewaited,hoveringoverthatkey Herheartbroke,becausesheshouldhaveknown WhenAntwone kissedher,andthenmadelovetoher,inhisownwayhewassayinggoodbye.Shedidn’tknowhisrealstory.Shedidn’tknow anythingabouthim
Tearsfilledhereyesonceagain.
“Iknowyou’regoingtoneedyourdaddy,”shesaid,talkingtoherstomach.
Eventhoughthisbrokeherheart,sheknewshehadtogiveitatry,sosheputacallthroughtothenumber Muchtohersurprise,itrangandrangandrang.Tearsfilledhereyes.
Whenthecall wenttovoicemail,shequicklyhungup Whatwasshesupposedtosay?Whatdidshetell themanshe loved?Thesamemanwhohadbrokenherheart.Abandonedher.
