JEFF MINICK lives and writes in Front Royal, Va. He is the author of two novels, “Amanda Bell” and “Dust on Their Wings,” and two works of nonfiction, “Learning as I Go” and “Movies Make the Man.”
Jeff Minick
Giving to Others Benefits Us, Too The action of giving has emotional and physical benefits
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t is more blessed to give than to receive.” That ancient piece of wisdom would probably baffle a 5-year-old. He might enjoy watching his mother open her birthday card and take from a gift box the perfume his father had helped him select, but odds are that tearing into a package on his own birthday and yanking out a Spider-Man outfit or a soccer ball would bring a bigger grin. After all, he’s a kid and, like most preschoolers, is focused on himself. But what about the rest of us? For many, donating our time, treasure, and talent to others brings enormous satisfaction. Let’s say we volunteer once a month to serve meals to the homeless. We dole out soup, casseroles, salad, and other dishes to men, women, and children living in a shelter, in their car, or on the street. The food we offer them is plain and simple—sustenance rather than some meal to delight the taste buds, such as the gazpacho or quiche we might prepare for our own supper. We leave the shelter that evening grateful that we have helped people in need, in fact, feeling pretty satisfied with ourselves. We may not be saints, but we’ve done a good deed and we take a little pride in that accomplishment. We may not feel more blessed, but we’re happier having given than receiving. Some observers might find that sentiment self-serving. “Oh, look at me,” they imagine such folks saying as they pat themselves on the back on the drive home. “I’m wonderful for helping others.” Well, perhaps we do leave that food line with our chest puffed out a bit. But are there benefits, other than self-satisfaction, in giving to others? In her online article “4 Health Benefits of Giving to Others,” nurse Kitty 50 I N S I G H T July 1–7, 2022
These charitable acts, for example, ‘release “good feeling” chemicals.’ Stafford explains that acts of generosity make you feel happy, are good for your health, promote social connections, and are contagious, meaning your deeds of goodwill may prompt others to do the same. According to Stafford, helping those in need can do everything from lowering your blood pressure to promoting joy. These charitable acts, for example, “release ‘good feeling’ chemicals such as endorphins, which give you a sense of euphoria, and oxytocin, which promotes tranquility and inner peace.” Of course, such gift-giving can take all sorts of forms and guises other than public service: the neighbor who helps you load a moving van, an aunt who slips you a few hundred bucks when you’re down on your luck, even a word of encouragement or kindness from a friend. These and a thousand other gestures of love may lift us out of a dark place and return us to the
path of light. For those offering such gifts, however, there are no guarantees of success. That kind word might be wasted breath; that donation of money might just as well have been thrown to the wind. Once our benefactors have made the effort, the matter is out of their hands. Now, let’s return to the matter raised earlier. Is the giver’s motive important? In other words, if a cop offers assistance to a penniless teenager living on the street, does it matter whether he does so out of pure compassion or just to feel good about himself? Perhaps it matters to the policeman. Less so to the boy. Whatever the motive of that officer, his largesse delivers the same result: The boy receives some necessary help. He gets shelter and food, and, if he’s lucky, finds his way off the street and back into school. Neurosurgeon and politician Ben Carson once said, “Happiness doesn’t result from what we get, but from what we give.” In other words, when we give, we get. It’s a paradox, but there it is. Giving means getting.
