Spartanburg Everyday February/March 2014 Edition

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Volume III, Issue 15 - February/March 2014

SPARTANBURG y a d y r e v e Bridal www.spartanburgeveryday.com

Complimentary

Edition

Advice for Newlyweds The ‘BIG E’ Local HGTV House-Hunter



The “BIG E”

FEATURED ARTICLES

10

Looking for a fun place to spend time with the family? Amusement industry veteran, Rick Hackel has transformed The “BIG E” into an elite Upstate entertainment destination. With arcade games, indoor playground, bowling alley, a nine-screen movie theater, and a small night club for adults; everyone is sure to have a blast!

SPARTANBURG y a d y r e ev

Publication Acknowledgements: Editors: Joy Mabry Les Timms III Contributing Editors: Beverly Knight Steve Wong Karen L. Puckett Mary Caldwell John Clayton Layout/Design Editor: Les Timms III Contributing Designers: Reid Price Scott Neill Website Design: Everette Murray Contributing Photographers: Ed Overstreet Reid Price Steve Wong Everette Murray John Clayton John Marsh Photography Contributing Writers: John Anwiler Tony Forest Beverly Knight Harvey J. Kulka Cody H. Owens Dr. Walter J. Kucaba, D.D.S., M.S. Pat Snyder Jill Miracle Terry L. Ledford, Ph.D. Steve Wong Project Manager: Wayne Smith

Every effort has been made to ensure the accuracy of this publication. However, the publisher cannot assume responsibility for errors or omissions. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission. Copyright ©2014.

Advice for Newlyweds

18

Jon Mitchell, minister at Duncan Church of Christ, and Scott Linnerud, minister at Calvary Baptist Church in Boiling Springs , remind couples that, “A wedding is just one day, a marriage is the rest of your life.” These two marriage counselors, with more than 39 years combined experience, have some sound advice for couples before they say, “I Do.”

A Local House-Hunter

26

Porscha Davis of Boiling Springs has become a local celebrity. Davis contacted HGTV “House Hunters,” one of her favorite shows, when she began her quest for a new home. With a budget of $100,000, an opinionated best friend, a hard-working Realtor, and the crew of HGTV’s House Hunters following her progression, Ms. Davis successfully became “a first-time home buyer.” Davis hopes her experience will inspire other individuals in their quest for home ownership.

Identifying The Enemy

30

Caring for a family member with dementia, Parkinson’s and other catastrophic diseases can sometimes be just as detrimental to the caregiver as the patient. Subtle, sometimes deadly enemies such as stress, lack of knowledge, and guilt can affect the relationship between the patient and caregiver. Pat Snyder helps others to effectively identify and implement actions to combat these issues that plague caregivers.


MAGPIE CHATTER

SPARTANBURG y a d y r eve As the season of “LOVE” approaches, I am reminded of one of the dearest statements my daughter whispered to me on her wedding day. She said with tears in her eyes, “Thank you and daddy for setting the perfect example of what a marriage should be. I only hope that Joey and I are as happy together as you and daddy.” Although “perfect” is definitely not the word I would have used, I knew what she meant. In this edition of Spartanburg Everyday, we have partnered with wedding experts that desire to aid you in making your wedding day as joyous and effortlessness as possible. Wedding professionals have seen all the “perfect” storms and are well equipped at navigating around all the “waves” that have a tendency to sink the unexperienced. In our continued efforts to bring you awe-inspiring programs and individuals serving and enjoying our “sparkling” county, we hope you enjoy a follow-up on a home recently featured on HGTV in the Boiling Springs area, and our features on events and businesses designed to bring safe, family-fun environments for Spartanburg and surrounding residents. Take advantage of these events and facilities and give one of the greatest gifts you can give to your family and yourself by spending time together. Our medical community is equally doing its part in bringing you the finest in health care and wellness programs designed to help families stay healthy and active. We know how important your family is to you and Spartanburg Everyday is committed to bringing you professionals and information to assist in caring for your loved one. No, we can’t claim that Spartanburg County is the “perfect” place to live; however as individuals with purpose and involvement, we can certainly continue to make it a better place to live. Spartanburg Everyday would like to thank its partners and others for their continued support and efforts to make Spartanburg the best place to live, work and play!

Volume III, Issue 15 - February/March 2014

Magnolia Magpies LLC

Joy Mabry, editor jmabry@spartanburgeveryday.com PO Box 172093 Spartanburg, SC 29301 864-381-8278 Wayne Smith, Project Manager wsmith@spartanburgeveryday.com 828-289-8568

Web Alert find more information online at

www.SpartanburgEveryday.com

One email away info@spartanburgeveryday.com

2 FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 u SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY

SPARTANBURG y everyda www.spartanburgeveryday.com

Complimentary

Bridal Edition

Advice for Newlyweds The ‘BIG E’

CONTENTS Magpie Chatter ...2

SHOPPING, EVENTS & ENTERTAINMENT Newberry Opera House…3 Carriage House Wine…4 Calendar of Events…5 At The Corner of I-85 & I-26...6

OUR COMMUNITY

First Tee of Spartanburg grant…9 The Big E Entertainment Outlet…10 Soar Spartanburg…12

BRIDAL

Electronic Wedding Planner …14 Wedding Checklist…16 Advice for Newlyweds…18

HOME & GARDEN

Metcalf Land…24 Spring at Hatcher Gardens…25 Local HGTV House-Hunter…26 Shower Steamer Tutorial…28

HEALTH & WELLNESS

Caregiver Tips …30 Dr. Walt Kucaba: Down in the Mouth…34 Search for top S.C. Senior Volunteer..35

Local HGTV House-Hunter

Spartanburg Everyday distribution includes the following areas in Spartanburg county: Downtown Spartanburg, Inman, Lyman, Moore, Duncan, Pacolet, Cowpens, Chesnee, Landrum, Boiling Springs, Hillcrest, Westgate, Roebuck, and Gaffney.


Come Visit Newberry for sumptuous dining and unique shopping 803.276.6264

February 2/4 Godspell The Musical 2/7 2/8 2/9 2/12 2/14 2/15 2/16 2/22 2/25 2/28

The Sylistics Richard Smith Glenn Miller Orchestra Nat. Dance Co. of Siberia Marina Lomazov Arlo Guthrie The Lettermen James Gregory - Comedy Man of La Mancha Delbert McClinton Limited Seating

www.newberryoperahouse.com 2014

2/25/14 3&8pm

Georgette Jones 3/22 8pm

Roslyn Kind 3/16 3pm

March 3/2 Annie Sellick and the

Cinderella-Russian National Ballet 5/8 8pm

3/3 3/4 3/6 3/8 3/9 3/11 3/15 3/16 3/19 3/20 3/22 3/23 3/24 3/25 3/28 3/29 3/30

Hot Club of Nashville Ozark Jubilee Church Basement LadiesA Mighty Fortress Michael Bolton Limited Seating The Oak Ridge Boys Frankie Avalon Dublin’s Irish Cabaret Cowboy Movies Roslyn Kind Don’t Stop Believing, Journey Tribute Direct from Ireland - Celtic Nights Georgette Jones and Band The Kingston Trio A Variety of Great Music Steep Canyon Rangers A Far Cry Up Yonder, Comedy Guy Lombardo's Royal Canadians

Frankie Avalon 3/9 3&8pm

2/4 3&8pm

3/4 3&8pm

The Kingston Trio 3/23 3&8pm

April 4/7 Golden Dragon Acrobats

Marina Lomazov 2/14 8pm

4/10 4/22 4/25 4/26 4/27 4/30

An Evening of Duo Piano Music Newberry College Opera Scenes Charlie Thomas' Drifters James Best - Comedy Doug and Bunny Williams C. B. Smith Show of Pigeon Forge

And Much More!

www.newberryoperahouse.com

Golden Dragon Acrobats

4/7 8pm

Steep Canyon Rangers 3/25 8pm

Box Office 803.276.6264


SHOPPING / ENTERTAINMENT By Tony Forest

Wedding beverages As you prepare for a wedding, deciding on the adult beverages is sometimes the last thing on the list. People are often frightened at the possible cost but then surprised at how affordable the cost can be. Depending on the brands you choose to use, the cost per person is usually between $4.00 and $8.00. The first thing to decide is what type of alcoholic beverages you will be serving. Beer, wine and liquor, or just beer and wine? When you add liquor to the equation, you also add the expense of mixers. For that reason, most events now usually go with just beer and wine. The next question is how much will I need? That is something I can help you determine. I have been in the business for over 33 years and can give you a very good approximation. I always get the question, “How much Sparkling wine?� The answer to that question depends on how you are going to serve the bubbles. If it is just part of the overall reception, then it will be counted in the rest of the wine total. If you are going to hand out a glass to all of the guests for the toast, you will need more. One other thing you need to consider is a corkage fee versus purchasing alcohol from the venue where you are having the event. If you bring your own alcohol, the venue may charge you a fee for each bottle that is opened and served or a set fee for each person in attendance. There is not enough room in this article to go into all of the details about adult beverage service, but if you have other questions, please come by Carriage House Wines and I will be happy to assist you. Tony Forest has been in the wine business for over 30 years and is the owner of Carriage House Wines in downtown Spartanburg. /CarriageHouse-Winesand-Wine-Bar

196 W Main St Spartanburg, SC

www.carriagehousewines.com

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Valentine Pops & Champagne Concert: Feb. 14 8 P.M. Twichell Auditorium at Converse College

Omega’s Mardi Gras 2014 March 7 9:00 P.M. Spartanburg Memorial Auditorium

Winter Jazz Series: Viva les Divas! Feb. 20 7 P.M. Chapman Cultural Center

Carolina Crabb Family Reunion March 8 6:00 P.M. Spartanburg Expo Center

Big Time Wrestling Feb. 28 8:00 P.M. Spartanburg Memorial Auditorium

9 to 5 : The Musical March 14 8:00 P.M. Chapman Cultural Center

Funniest Man in America James Gregory Feb. 28 7:30 P.M. Chapman Cultural Center

Hejaz Shrine Circus March 31-April 3 7:00 P.M. Spartanburg Memorial Auditorium

CALENDAR OF EVENTS

February & March Events

Downtown Spartanburg is captured at sunset from the Denny’s building by photographer Ed Overstreet.

SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY u FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 5


SHOPPING / ENTERTAINMENT

At the Corner of I-85 & I-26

Dance at my wedding? No, Really, Well, Okay just one more

By Steve Wong

Ding, ding, ding, ding. Ding, ding, ding, ding. An anxious and well-dressed man gently bangs a silver spoon against a crystal champagne glass in a room full of smiling family, friends, and strangers. The honored couple is now and forevermore joined at the hip. There are hors d’oeuvres, freshcut flowers, music, and booze a’plenty. And I’m a wearing a necktie and dress pants that are choking me to death in more ways than one. Yes, it’s that time of the year. Ladies and gentlemen now that I have your attention, is there a wedding in your foreseeable future? Are you getting married? Will you be in a wedding? Or, will you just be one of the many on-lookers there to… ah… wish the bride and groom well (of course!)… see a bunch of people you’ve not seen in a long time and meet a lot of other people you’ll never meet again… and just have a good time? As a guy who has (1) bore the ring (I was 6 years old), (2) given away the bride (my aunt), (3) ushered (“The bride’s or the groom’s side?”) (4) bested the man (my brother), (5) married the bride (my wife, duh), and (6) threw up on some lady’s shoes (all at different weddings, thank God), I don’t consider myself to be any sort of wedding insider. I just pretty much do as I’m told, and it pretty much works itself out. There are plenty of other people/women in the wedding party willing, able, and determined to be charge, and I say, “have at it.” And, hey, you, the groom, straighten up, pay attention, and say “yes, Dear.” You are just the guy in orbit around bride in the universe of womanhood. Having fun at your own wedding can be iffy, but when you’re just a guest there’s no reason not to party on! Granted, I’m easily impressed, but one of the best weddings I ever drank too much at was in Charleston, SC. I have absolutely no idea whose wedding I was attending, but I know Charleston is an awesome city in which to have a big Southern wedding. Bride? Groom? It was crowded with many pretty-young-things and hunky Citadel cadets, but Jimmy Buffett sat three pews in front of mine, on the bride’s side. After the big-church ceremony we all hoofed it just down the street to the reception held somewhere with stone arches, ornate black wrought iron fences, naked baby angels in water fountains, and an open bar. One of those well-known-in-South Carolina beach music bands played all the right dance tunes of the day, and when the shagging mother of the bride missed a beat and hit the beer-soaked floor in a sequined blue evening gown, that’s when the fun really began… at least that’s what I’m told. A little sprawl on the dance floor didn’t stop the bride’s mother. With what she was paying, not having a damn good time was not an option. And the band played on… Not all weddings have to be big, expensive, and bruising to be fun. Last year, I attended what I consider to be one of the better weddings on my list. It was outdoors on a beautiful spring day with the Blueridge Mountains as a backdrop. Under sunny blue skies and on rolling grassy green yards, the mood was casual and not wearing a tie was perfectly okay. The wedding party was small but obviously engaged in the true spirit of the moment. The bride and groom had eyes only for each other… they were focused on why they were there and their smiles were genuine. A single guitarist played baroque tunes, while a nearby woodpecker kept counterpoint time. We onlookers were just in privileged orbit around two blissful people making love. I had a lemon tea at the afternoon reception and enjoyed it immensely. Steve Wong is a writer, living in the peach orchards of Inman, a small town in northern Spartanburg County. He takes full responsibility for his views on life, and this magazine claims no responsibility whatsoever for his odd ideas. Constructive or not criticism can be emailed to Just4Wong@Gmail.com.

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Shop Early for Best Selection! Fall/Winter Clearance Sale Hours: Mon - Fri 9:30-6:00 Saturday 9:30 - 4:00

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WEDNESDAY WINE DOWN ALL NIGHT Malbec special House Margarita - $3 Jose Quervo - $3.25 Apple Martini - $3.00 Caprese Flatbread- $10.95 THIRSTY THURSDAY Cabernet Sauvignon special (excludes house) Screwdrivers - $2.98 all night Collard Green Dip - $6.95

Downtown Spartanburg’s Premiere Classic Event Venue where every event is simply - Signature.

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FALL & WINTER HOURS: Tues & Wed- 5-10pm Thurs & Fri- 5-11 pm Sat 5-12 Midnight Weekly Specials TUESDAY NIGHT: Retail Bottle Wine specials Rum & Coke $2 all night Bruschetta al Pomodoro (no cheese) $8

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The First Tee of Spartanburg received a grant for $17,500 and was named one of four chapters of The First Tee in NC/SC to be awarded grants totaling $100,000 from PwC Carolinas. In addition to The First Tee of Spartanburg, grants funded by the PwC Charitable Foundation were awarded to The First Tee chapters of Charlotte, the Triangle, and the Triad. In conjunction with the grant, PwC employees provide volunteer assistance to The First Tee chapters. A series of

Making

four Financial Literacy classes led by Spartanburg-based PwC employees are scheduled for December, January, and April at the Downtown Campus of Spartanburg Community College. Topics include “Income and Careers” and “Paying for College” with curriculum tailored to youth grades 6 through 12. One boy and one girl from The First Tee of Spartanburg who participate in the Financial Literacy classes will be selected to attend the 2014 US Open Championships at one of golf ’s most sto-

ried courses, Pinehurst No. 2, along with partners from PwC’s Carolinas offices. For the first time ever, the events are held on consecutive weeks, June 9-15 (Men’s Open) and 16-22 (Women’s Open). “The First Tee’s mission of promoting youth education aligns with PwC’s focus on developing future leaders, and we are looking forward to building a lasting connection between our offices and these chapters,” said Matt Kosmicki, PwC Carolinas Managing Partner.

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COMMUNITY

First Tee of Spartanburg awarded $17,500 grant


COMMUNITY

BIG E

ENTERTAINMENT OUTLET brings big family fun to Upstate By JOHN CLAYTON

R

ICK HACKEL quit retirement in the name of fun. Hackel, a veteran in the amusement industry in the Chicagoland area, had left the midway games and their flashing lights but the bells and whistles called him back when he found the Big E Entertainment Outlet. The Big E, which features a nine-screen movie theater, full-sized bowling alley, arcade games, an indoor playground for kids and a small night club with live entertainment and a full menu for adults, opened for business under the experienced Hackel on Oct. 1 of last year. “(The facility) was on

10 FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 u SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY

its last breath,” Hackel said. “Since we’ve done the renovations, the public has embraced us. We’re trying to rebrand ourselves and trying to endear ourselves to the community.” After taking over operations in October, Hackel began a $1.7 million renovation that also included a mandated switch to digital projectors in the cinema -- two of which are 3D capable. With the recent closure of Spartanburg’s east-side theater complex, Hackel said he is hoping the Big E will become an option for movie goers from the area. Plans for April 2015 also include a miniature golf course, batting cages and a go-kart track as Big E becomes an indoor/out-

door complex. “(The facility) needed some new life brought to the table,” Hackel said. When plans are completed, the Big E will be the only entertainment complex of its kind without a Greenville, Charlotte or Columbia zip code. So far, the reaction from the local community has been positive. “We’ve seen the numbers double since we took over,” Hackel said, noting the progress and the sparse crowds when he took over operations. “It’s amazing,” said Anna Grace Phillips, 11, who was visiting with family from Clyde, N.C. Phillips and other families were taking advantage of Big E’s amenities during a chilly Martin Luther King Day holiday in January. “I’m really excited that this is available to us here,” said

Elizabeth Goodenough, of Gaffney, who was spending time with daughter Emerson, 5. “It’s a great place to have birthday parties and things like that. We didn’t really have that here before.” Two days earlier, Big E had set a new facility record by hosting 19 birthday parties. The previous high had been six. “A family atmosphere is what we’re striving for,” Hackel said. “We don’t have violent video games and we keep the playground for the younger kids. . . . We want to make it a safe environment. That’s what (parents) want when they bring their kids here.”


COMMUNITY

Bowling industry veteran Alan Southern, top photo, left, took over floor operations this past October and has helped transform The Big E into an elite Upstate entertainment destination. Here, Southern poses with several members of his team.

BIG E ENTERTAINMENT OUTLET >> LOCATED OFF I-85, EXIT 90 on Factory Outlets Boulevard, adjacent to Gaffney Premium Outlets >> OPEN 7 DAYS A WEEK: Mon.-Wed. -- 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Thurs.-Fri. -- 11 a.m.-1 a.m. Sat. -- 11 a.m.-12 a.m. Sun. -- 11 a.m.-10 p.m. >> For parties and corporate events, call 864-489-1515, Ext. 100 SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY u FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 11


COMMUNITY

Communitywide Spartanburg Soaring! Adds Playfulness to Economic Growth By CODY OWENS If during the next few months, someone in Spartanburg tells you to “go fly a kite,” accept it as an invitation to celebrate everything that is good about our community. Spartanburg Soaring! is a countywide initiative to build civic pride from January to May and beyond. Chapman Cultural Center inaugurated the initiative after more than a year of planning to engage all citizens in cultural curiosity and to promote active play no matter how young or old they might be. The Center was soon joined by 25 other community partners, who share in a vision of Spartanburg going to new heights. And it is all symbolized by the simple kite, tethered to our humanity, soaring to places only dreamed. “Spartanburg Soaring! came about because of one man who wanted to share his passion for kites,” Chapman Cultural Center President and CEO said Jennifer Evins said. “Chuck Holmes, Master Kite Maker

and two-time National Award Winner, came to us about a year ago and offered to let us exhibit his extensive kite collection. We saw it as an opportunity to make the kite a community symbol of progress and playfulness.” The kite-themed initiative is a highly collaborative celebration of Spartanburg’s soaring successes, open to all citizens, businesses, and organizations. Though the campaign will only last until May, the results will be long–lasting on the city’s economy and strong sense of community pride. “Spartanburg is on the rise — culturally, economically, educationally — and we should be proud of how we’re soaring together,” Evins said. Although Spartanburg Soaring! is spearheaded by Chapman Cultural Center, the all-inclusive program is a collaboration of many partners: Ballet Spartanburg, City of Spartanburg Parks and Recreation, HUB-BUB, Hub City Writers’ Project, Mary Black Foundation, Partners for Ac-

tive Living, SEW Eurodrive, Spartanburg Art Museum, Spartanburg County Historical Association, Spartanburg County Public Library, Spartanburg Downtown Association, Spartanburg Philharmonic Orchestra, Spartanburg Photography Guild, Spartanburg Science Center, Spartanburg Youth Theatre, Spoken Word Spartanburg, The Johnson Collection, The Marriott at Renaissance Park, The PhiferJohnson Foundation, The Spartanburg County Foundation, The Spartanburg Little Theatre, Thomas E. Hannah Family YMCA, Upstate International, and WSPA TV. And, if anyone else wants to add to the festivities, they are more than welcome. “The list of activities grows everyday,” Evins said. “Right now we have everything from exhibits and festivals to scavenger hunts and a poetry slam.” But it is the upcoming kite exhibit, owned by Holmes, that provided the catalyst for Spartanburg Soaring! and it will certainly be a centerpiece of attention. In 2012, Holmes and his wife approached Photography Provided By Chapman Cultural Center

14 15- FEB. 14, 2014 DAY 12 JAN. FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014uuGAME SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY


Any individual, business, or organization interested in becoming a partner should contact Jennifer Evins at (864) 278-9663 or jEvins@SpartanArts.org. For more information on all Soaring! events, go to SpartanburgSoaring.com.

COMMUNITY

Chapman Cultural Center in hopes of showcasing their collection. “We knew right away that Mr. Holmes’ extensive kite collection was too exciting to be just a single exhibit,” Evins said. “Throughout March and April, his kites will hang from every ceiling at Chapman. It will definitely be a most beautiful exhibit.” Another highpoint of the initiative will be the Spartanburg Soaring! International Kite Festival on March 29. Evins hopes that kite enthusiasts of all kinds—from near and far—will come to Barnet Park for a day of kite flying and other activities. “I can just see hundreds of kites aloft in Barnet Park, representing many countries and creative people” Evins said. “Kites held by children; kites flown by professionals; beautiful kites; simple kites; kites that represent the diversity, creativity, and progress of Spartanburg.” The City of Spartanburg’s Upstate International parade will provide the opening ceremony, furthering the spirit of multiculturalism. The Parade and Festival, 1-4 p.m., will kick off April, National Kite Month. Building up to the International Kite Festival will be Community Kite-Flying Fields. Several local parks and playgrounds will become kite-flying sites on Saturday, March 15 and 22, 2-4 p.m., thanks to Mary Black Foundation. Activities will be organized by City of Spartanburg Parks and Recreation, Partners for Active Living, and Thomas E. Hannah Family YMCA. Competitions and other activities will engage participants of all ages in the fun of kite flying. Winners of the competitions will advance to the International Kite Festival. The designated community kite-flying fields are Stewart Park Fields, Northwest Center Fields, CC Woodson Center Fields, Adams Park in Beaumont Mills, Woodland Heights Elementary School playground, Jesse Bobo Elementary School playground, and Thomas E. Hannah YMCA soccer fields. In addition to newfound events, everyone’s favorite annual shindig--Spring Fling--will be Spartanburg Soaring! themed for 2014. “Like a beautiful kite, Spartanburg is already on the rise. We’re just adding a much needed element of playfulness to the city’s economic growth,” Evins said. “Can’t you just feel the tug of your kite soaring in the air? That tug gives you hope and energy and carries you forward looking up to the sky and hoping to keep it flying for as long as you can hold on. This is how I feel about the arts and the role that arts and culture have played in the revitalization of our city and the joy that we give children and adults every single day of the year.”

A generous gift that was specifically designated for lighting transformed the C.B. (Slim) Mooneyham Baseball Field at SMC.

SMC baseball field receives the gift of light Baseball at Spartanburg Methodist College is looking a lot brighter these days...and nights, thanks to a generous gift that was specifically designated for lighting the C.B. (Slim) Mooneyham Baseball Field. The lights are in honor of SMC Alum J. Wesley Sparrow, Jr. and former SMC Director of Admissions Henry B. Sparrow, II as well as the SMC baseball teams of 1977 and 1978. Baseball is of great interest to the Sparrow family and John Sparrow donated the major gift with baseball specifically in mind. Wesley Sparrow served as the student manager for the SMC baseball team in 1977 and 1978. In fact, the opportunity to serve as the student manager was the deciding factor for Wesley attending SMC over Charleston Southern. “This gift is transformative for SMC! Our players will no longer have to miss afternoon classes or labs because of games that could only be held in the daylight; afternoon or morning rain outs can be rescheduled for evening games and rain delays won’t be game-ending,” shared SMC President, Dr. Colleen Perry Keith. “The list could go on. It’s a big deal for us and serves to make SMC more competitive as our complex will be improved.” Keith commended Bob Fuzy, VP of Institutional Advancement, SMC Baseball Coach Tim Wallace and former SMC President Charlie Teague for their assistance in working with the Sparrow family for such a wonderful gift...a gift that will forever change the game of baseball at SMC. The Mooneyham Baseball Field is one of three facilities composing the Olin D. Johnston Outdoor Athletic Facility, named in honor of the late Mr. Johnston who was a graduate of Textile Industrial Institute and served as Governor of SC and as a U.S. Senator.


WEDDING

DAILY SPECIALS WEDDING/CATERING Happy Hour 3-6PM: Local Beer $2, Import $3 Live Music Fri-Sat PM 910 E. Main St, Spartanburg

(864) 585-3720

14 FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 u SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY


Wedding Errors

Planning a wedding in the 21st century has new pitfalls, which “mom” experience cannot guide us through. The vast resources of the internet give us more options than thought possible a few years ago. The options offer great appeal, however they come with their own set of risks. Hopefully I can help some Bridesto-Be by sharing some of the problems that have created trouble The most stressful incident occurred while I was trying to secure reservations online. Destination weddings are trendy and for me. Online dress shopping can be fun and a good way to get ideas, however buying a gown from a website may not be the best idea. A dress looks very different on a model than on you. Even if you find a model that favors you, chances are you will miss some quality that could change the look of the dress. Browsing for a gown online, I picked out a dress that flattered a model with a similar build. Excited to try on this same style and color at a local bridal shop, I discovered that I had not considered my dark features and was very disappointed with the washed out look created by the true white color. The dress consultant suggested a gown that I would never chose online or on the rack, however this gown had a black trim which made it absolutely stunning with my complexion and was considerably lower priced than the one online. Trying on dresses is essential to picking the right one. If you are purchasing your gown online, I suggest buying a standard size so that you can return it if necessary. You can always have it altered once you are certain it is your perfect gown.

ideally less stressful; however booking the trip is not

always a piece of “wedding” cake. Travel websites are great for booking vacations because they are quick and easy. Most credit/debit cards have daily limits on how much you can spend which aids in preventing identity theft, however these bank policies can be incredibly frustrating when spending a large amount at one time. If you are booking for a large group traveling together, be prepared to split the charges up between a couple of different cards, or you can contact your bank or credit card company a couple of days prior booking to inquire about raising your daily limit. Another alternative is to leave this “headache” to a reputable travel agent to ensure that your party winds up on the same flights, at the same hotel, and all at the same time.

Online options and conveniences make planning a wedding easier and faster for the modern, trendy “Do it Yourself Bride.” Take advantage of these tools for research, registries, and budgeting, but some of the older traditions like dress shopping, gift shopping, and working with wedding professionals can help you Registering for wedding gifts online is a great idea and valuable avoid unnecessary stress and cost. I hope that you enjoy plantime saver; however don’t get so high tech that you leave your ning your big day as much as I am, and hopefully avoid these older relatives behind. As tempting as it is for our generation to little “snags” that have caused me unnecessary anxiety. use the one stop Amazon shop, it is important to remember that not everyone is versed in online shopping, or comfortable shopping over the internet. A good alternative is to register online at stores that you know are in the local area of your guests or relatives. Most chain home decor/improvement stores have bridal registries that will allow you to register online so that your loved ones can visit the store and still get the items you have selected. This way you don’t waste time answering phone calls and apologizing for making life more difficult for those trying to wish you well.

26 •Wedding Planning • Volume 1,Issue 3 • FEB 2012/MARCH 2012

SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY u FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 15

WEDDING

Wedding Planning

E lectronic By Patricia Mabry


WWEDDING edding

Wedding Checklist

Many couples become engaged during the holiday season. Planning a wedding is a very individual process for the couple and their families, but there are some general guidelines that will help make the plans go smoothly. Take a deep breath and clip this checklist to get started on your exciting year!

9-12 months before the wedding: • • • • • • • • • • • •

Start a wedding notebook or internet site to capture all of your ideas. Choose your wedding date. Begin looking at wedding and food magazines and attending wedding shows to get your inspiration. Determine your budget. Discuss it with any parents and family members who may be contributing. Determine who will pay for each segment of the wedding and celebrations. Decide on the level of formality you desire for your wedding. Start a rough draft of your guest list. Determine and reserve the wedding and reception locations and your officiant. Begin pre-marital counseling and any complete homework assignments. Purchase dress, shoes and undergarments. Leave adequate time for at least three dress fittings. Choose your wedding party. Visit with caterers, photographers, musicians and florists to gather ideas and narrow your choices. Host an engagement party if desired. Include immediate families and all in the wedding party at a minimum.

6-9 months before the wedding: • • • • • • • •

Announce your wedding date for out of town guests or send a save the date card. Register at gift registries that are convenient to your guests. Book the venue for your rehearsal and rehearsal dinner. Select a wedding printer and invitations or begin designing your own online. Shop for bridesmaids’ dresses. Schedule alterations and fittings. Book a honeymoon and order any necessary passports or travel documents. Book your photographer, videographer, musicians, DJ, caterer and florist and begin determining your preferences with each vendor. Begin making a wedding day schedule of events, including tasks for specific participants.

4-6 months before the wedding: • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Select your readings and readers who will participate in the wedding. Purchase your wedding rings. Order your wedding cake if this is not handled by the caterer. Select menu for reception. Reserve accommodations for out-of-town wedding participants and guests. Be clear on how payment for accommodations will be handled with guests. Arrange for rental items such as flatware, linens, tables and chairs, place settings, arches or floral pieces. Choose groom and groomsman attire. Place order if these are rentals. Decide on bridesmaid accessories and shoes. Choose wedding favors, if desired. Give each vendor a rough timeline for wedding day events. Confirm dates for bachelorette parties, bachelor’s parties and wedding showers. Visit a hairdresser and cosmetics professional for style ideas and book wedding day appointments if needed. Give a wedding guest list to shower hostesses.

2-4 months before the wedding: • • • • • • • •

Finalize guest list with both families and send invitations eight weeks prior to wedding. Choose or make a photograph for wedding announcements. Finalize rehearsal dinner plans, menu and décor. Finalize flower order and menus. Select music for wedding and reception and review playlists with musicians, DJ or bands. Select gifts for all attendants, hostesses and parents. Plan wedding transportation to venue, reception and going-away events. Purchase candles, flower girl and ring bearer accessories.

R 16 u SPARTANBURG 8 •Rutherford 2014 Everyday • Volume EVERYDAY II, Issue 12 • January-February 2014 e FEBRUARY/MARCH

• •

Submit a wedding announcement to local papers for the couple, parents and grandparents. Schedule a wedding portrait with your photographer.

1 month before the wedding: • • • • • • • • • • • •

Meet with photographer and videographer at the venue to determine specific photos of preparations, wedding and reception. Enter guest list into a manageable database and make daily additions and changes. Work with printer or make your own menu cards and wedding programs. Assign seating for reception and prepare place cards. Host a bridesmaid’s luncheon. Write and rehearse your vows. Get blood tests (if needed) and a marriage license. Sign all legal documents for name change. Have your final dress fitting and pick up dress. Take your wedding portrait. Complete and mail wedding rehearsal invitations. Confirm hotel arrangements for out-of-town guests and attendants.

1-2 weeks before the wedding: • • • • • • • • • •

Order any bar supplies for the rehearsal dinner and reception. Phone any invitees who have not responded. Make sure all deposits for vendors are paid and confirmed. Get a haircut and experiment with the wedding style. Put checks and tips for all vendors, musicians and officiants in envelopes for best man or parents to deliver after the ceremonies. Wear your shoes indoors as much as possible to insure they are comfortable for your day. Guarantee your number of guests with your vendors. Give an itinerary and maps to all wedding party with any assignments for the ceremony. Include phone numbers for any vendors where they have tasks. Send maps to out of town guests. Pack for your honeymoon.

The day before your wedding: • • • • • •

Give rings to best man. Give favors to the proper person. Get a manicure and pedicure. Confirm flight or travel arrangements for honeymoon. Prepare an emergency contact list for all vendors. Rehearse the ceremony with the wedding party and officiant.

Your wedding day: • • • •

EAT! Keep appointments with hairdresser and makeup specialists. Take your wedding license and rings. Enjoy every moment of your special day.

When you return from your honeymoon: • • • • •

Have your wedding dress cleaned and preserved. Write thank you notes. Complete your name change process. Meet with the photographer and videographer to finalize your memories. Contact your wedding registries to make sure all are completed.

Congratulations on your new beginning!


SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY u FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 17


WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY BY JOHN MARSH PHOTOGRAPHY JOHN MARSH PHOTOGRAPHY

Advice for Newlyweds From money to marital bliss, counselors offer valuable tips By KAREN L. PUCKETT

A

wedding is just one day, a marriage is the rest of your life. “You need to plan a lot more for the marriage than you do for the wedding because 10 years later, you’re not going to remember much about that day,” said Jon Mitchell, minister at Duncan Church of Christ. “It’s putting things in its proper perspective.” That’s where pre-marital counseling comes in. Mitchell, who has counseled couples before their big day during his 14 years as a minister, added that he never even got to taste the cake at his own wedding 10 years ago. Except, of course, when his bride, Beth, smashed a piece in his face. In counseling sessions, Mitchell covers a range of issues that need to be addressed long before the “I do’s.” On the top of his list is spouses taking each other for granted.

18 FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 u SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY

“I tell couples to be on the lookout for complacency and apathy,” Mitchell says. “That can sneak into a marriage, and when that happens, you start to feel like roommates instead of husband and wife.” How to prevent that from happening is simply to remember why you fell in love in the first place. As a result, the romance will be kept alive. That doesn’t mean taking her on exotic Caribbean cruises—although that can’t hurt—but rather enjoying each other’s company, especially in the course of day-to-day activities. “Marriage is not a Nicholas Sparks movie. It’s hard work,” says Scott Linnerud, minister at Calvary Baptist Church in Boiling Springs and a counselor for 25 years.

“It’s important that the both of you spend time together.” As Linnerud and his wife, Barb, approach three decades in wedded bliss—although, he tells couples, no marriage is solely made of such bliss—they still relish “the little things” to maintain the romance. “We find things that we enjoy doing together, traveling, walking, people-watching at the mall,” Linnerud says. “I just love hanging out with her.” Mitchell recommends hanging out with the future in-laws. “They should spend at least three days of deep, quality time with their fiance’s parents and be really observant. See what’s good and what’s bad and take mental note of their habits,” Mitchell explains. “Generally speaking you pick up characteristics of both parents.” After you spend that quality time with the in-laws, get away from them after you’re married, Mitchell adds.


WEDDING

“If you can move away from Mom and Dad, do it, even if it’s just the other side of town, but preferably out of state,” he says. “It’s a very sore spot in a lot of marriages, like giving credence to Mom and Dad over the opinion of your spouse or Mom and Dad interfering in your marriage. If there’s stress in any way, put distance between you.” Think “Everybody Loves Raymond.” Speaking of parents, Linnerud typically has the couple fill out a questionnaire with questions that often require essay-style answers, such as How Do Your Parents Feel About This Marriage? If the parents do not support the union of their child and future son- or daughter-in-law, then that’s a red flag worth exploring during the sessions. Both Mitchell and Linnerud get down to “I tell couples to basics, discussing the realities of daily living be on the lookout and possible conflicts that for complacency can arise if not handled and apathy. That appropriately between the newlyweds. At the top of can sneak into that list: Finances. a marriage, and “I challenge them to live when that hapon one income,” says Linpens, you start nerud, explaining that he and his wife did that for about 10 to feel like roomyears, with Barb, who has a mates instead four-year degree, returning of husband and to work after their youngwife.” est child entered first grade. REV. JON MITCHELL “At one time we survived on $15,000, one car and a house in Detroit. I don’t know how we did it, but we did.” Linnerud also cautions against couples having separate checking accounts which can lead to neither knowing where the money is going. In addition, he challenges them to set a budget and stick to it. Mitchell agrees and also encourages newlyweds to “be frugal, be savers and live within your means.” “Women crave security from their men,” Mitchell says. “If both parties are responsible with the money, and she can see that all the bills are paid and that the savings account is growing, then that builds security for her. In turn she will have more trust and respect for her husband.” As preachers, both Mitchell and Linnerud discuss with the couples Biblical commands about

God’s design for marriage, studying Scripture about the husband’s and wife’s role in the home, intimacy, and other relationship topics. From personal experience, Mitchell learned—sometimes the hard way—that the first few years of a marriage are the toughest. Upon reflection, he says something Beth did and still does helped to weather those early years. “From day one, if I help with the laundry, take out the trash, wash the dishes, Beth notices it and always thanks me. That has made a good impression on me and makes me want to keep on doing it,” he says. “It’s a positive

thing in our marriage and has had positive repercussions.” Finally, acceptance of each other is a focal point during counseling sessions with Linnerud. “Acceptance with no strings attached does not mean ‘I’m going to marry you in order to fix you,’” Linnerud said. And, if there are differences, then open and honest communication is the key to understand each person’s point of view. “Take time to listen to one another,” Linnerud said. “Any problem can be solved if you just talk about it. That’s how your marriage is going to last.” SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY u FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 19


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Crepe Myrtle lined drive announcing the bride’s arrival; an intimate ceremony in the English Garden amid blooming irises; a farmhouse table under the Ivy Jasmine Arbor set for an elegant rehearsal dinner; the sound of flowing fountains of the Roman baths adding natural music to your wedding reception; and don’t forget the sunlit Pecan Grove and the glass Greenhouse draped with Creeping Fig for an elegant large gathering. The possiblities are endless.

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Home & Garden

HOME & GARDEN

MetcaLf

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Should youbut use we yourhave “residential” REALTOR “I’m sorry, a problem”. ... to help you buy land? solemn words no one wants to hear from The time has come to sell your current resitheirand real estate as aofclosing is approachdence escape theagent bondage subdivision life; ing with commitments on the table. then seek the refuge of the country for building your dream home. Afterreal several interviews, younot have finally selected an industry Most estate agents are experienced in selling leader marketlots yourwith home, agreedhave uponbeen an asking price and land.toWhile houses scrutinized forex-title/ ecuted a listing agreement. survey numerousREALTOR times and usually THEN,issues your residential hands you aclose BUYERwithout AGENCYa hitch, land is uniquely different. We have sold property AGREEMENT, granting that Agent the exclusive right to representfor you in your who quest acquired for land. the land under a King’s Grant. Othfamilies Agent thenland explains thatthrough their skills and expertise are ad-AlersYour have passed down several generations. equate for it assisting withidea, this transition and furthermore youcash will though isn’t ayou good many sellers simply made incur no costs for their services because the Seller will be paying the purchases same without an inattorney examining thehouse. title. While Our timcommission, as you the disposition of your this ber industry clients offer individual tracts that come out is true with Multiple Listing Service properties, you could be in forof an expensive truth is 100,000 the brokerage company alone packagelesson salesotherwise. that haveThe exceeded acres. When condetermines of commission, if any,ittoisbeevident paid to that a Buyer’s sidering the amount many potential problems, title/ Agent. survey obstacles and land deals are synonymous. Many land brokerage companies do not place their inventory in the MLS for numerous reasons. Tracts may be withheld at the request helping people buy and land in theinformaUpstate ofWe the have seller been because alternative methods of sell disseminating tion land 40 professionals have proven todid be more useful. landin fortoover years. Our surveyor his first platOther for us companies listcompany properties attorney statewide.did We his list properties across theus in 1971. The first closing with entire Upstate and no centralized to accommodate proper1976. Our civil engineer has MLS overexists 35 years of experience. To ties in numerous counties. Hence, the contractual obligation for the successfully close land sales it is necessary to comply with sharing of commissions via the MLS will probably not be available ina a myriad of ordinances and regulations land acquisition and you could be responsiblethat for vary payingfrom yourcounty Agent’s commission. to county. Legal issues routinely involve prescriptive easeIs Buyer Agency a good option land transactions? It depends ments, limited warranty deeds,formineral reservations, timber ondeeds, your selection Realtors. Like most professionals these days huntingofleases, unknown heirs, abandoned easements we are not all the same. Only a few specialize in land with the vast followed by an residential. infinite number of problems involving deed majority in general However, the National Association restrictions. Environmental issues within the past year alone of Realtors code of ethics Article 11 clearly states “Realtors shall not provide specialized services outside of War their ll respective areasand of experhave ranged from buried World explosives famtise, they thestormwater assistance of regulations. one who is competent in that ilyunless dumps toengage DHEC I can’t begin particular of on the the real deal-to-deal estate industry”. With this caveat in mind, to even facet touch survey problems that can when buying or selling land it makes sense to use one of our agents jeopardize a sale. When you finally think you have seen with many years of experience in the land business. Our staff also it all, a new issue like an improperly closedinroad that is includes two of onlyarises, four Accredited Land Consultants the entire Upstate. currently holding up a 70 acre sale. A good reputation is hard to earn and even harder to keep. Metcalf has been successfully thousands If youLand are Company, buying orInc. selling land, you needhelping an experienced of folks buy and sell land in the Upstate of South Carolina for over 40 landFor broker. Then whenvisit he calls and says “we have a probyears. more information www.metcalfland.com.

lem,” it will be followed by, “but we have seen it before.”

MetcalfLand.com “The Upstate’s Premier Land Website” 24 FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 u SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY S •Spartanburg Everyday • Volume 3, Issue 13 • October/November 2013

e 32

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Spring in the Garden

By Beverly Knight With the chilly temperatures, spring might seem far away. But Hatcher Garden & Woodland Preserve, located in the heart of Spartanburg, is busy making preparations for the warmer temperatures and milder weather that everyone knows is on the way. Horticulturist and garden manager Jeff Hall has already begun potting up this year’s selection of perennials and evergreens for sale at the Spring Plant Sale scheduled for April 18, 8 a.m. – 5 p.m., and April 19, 9 a.m. – 1 p.m. Each year Hall scours websites and gardening publications to find new varieties that will appeal to area gardeners. This year’s sale will feature five varieties of Japanese maples and six different fern cultivars that are suitable for Spartanburg gardens. “We sent out a survey to those who are regulars at our plant sales to determine what types of plants they are interested in buying,” Hall says of the garden’s efforts to have for purchase plants that are not available at other outlets. “It seems that ferns are at the top of many

gardeners’ wish lists for this area, so we decided to broaden our selection this year.” Hatcher Garden sells a variety of plants year-round out of its greenhouse, but the Spring Plant Sale is eagerly anticipated by avid gardeners because they know they can always find something new and interesting as well as all of their old favorites. There will be a member’s only sale Thursday, April 17, 3 – 6 p.m. For those who are not already Hatcher Garden members, $30 memberships will be on sale the day of the event. It’s worth the price of membership to receive a 10 percent discount on the price of all plants and get the opportunity to buy before the public sale begins. Also in April, the First African Violet Society of Spartanburg will be holding its spring sale in the Hatcher Garden board room. April 3, 1 p.m. – 5 p.m., and April 4, 9 a.m. – 5 p.m., club members will be available to sell their propagated plants. They will also be on hand to answer questions about the care and growing of African violets. Plant growing supplies

LANDSCAPING

& MAINTENANCE

will be available for sale as well. Further proof that spring is on the way is the fact that Twilight in the Garden, Hatcher’s May 1 spring fundraiser, has been in the planning stage for months. This year’s theme, “Lowcountry in the Upcountry,” promises to provide another festive night in the garden, with local chef William Cribb serving a Lowcountry buffet under the tents on the front lawn. There is never an off-season at Spartanburg’s only free public garden. It’s open year-round from dawn to dusk so that people can enjoy every season in the garden. There is no bad time to visit Hatcher Garden, but everyone’s favorite season is spring when the camellias, azaleas and spring bulb plants dot the 10 acres of woodlands with brilliant colors. And spring can’t come too soon for both gardeners and garden enthusiasts. For information about Hatcher Garden or any of the upcoming events in the garden, contact Robin Vollmer, executive Director of Hatcher Garden, at (864)574-7724 or visit www.hatchergarden.org.

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HOME & GARDEN

Hatcher highlights include Spring Plant Sale in April


HOME & GARDEN

“Twenty-something Porscha has been working two jobs to save for a house for herself and her dog, Diamond, in Spartanburg, South Carolina. With her opinionated best friend Ashley along for the hunt, she’s looking for a 3 bedroom home that’s wheelchair accessible for her mom, and she insists on upgrades like hardwoods and granite. With an entry-level budget of $100,000, she’ll have her hands full trying to find everything she wants.”

PORSCHA DAVIS

HGTV appearance has been a fun, ‘surreal’ experience for Spartanburg County house-hunter By MARY CALDWELL

P

ORSCHA DAVIS of Boiling Springs didn’t really broadcast the fact that she was going to appear on a January episode of HGTV’s “House Hunters.” But that hasn’t kept her from being recognized throughout town. “It’s crazy, because I didn’t really spread the word at work or anything. Even in the grocery store, I’ve had people call out, ‘Porscha Davis! Hey, I love the house you picked!’ I went out to Sunday dinner with my mom, and someone said, ‘You were on ‘House Hunters’! I love your

26 FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 u SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY 28 JAN. 15- FEB. 14, 2014 u GAME DAY

house!’ “ Davis says. “It’s really, really cool. The whole experience has been so surreal,” she says. Davis’ journey began last year when she decided to start the home-buying process. In her 20s, she works full-time at Draexlmaier Automotive and part-time at Jennifer on Mane Salon and was ready to start looking for a home. She loved watching HGTV’s “House Hunters,” which films in different cities to show home buyers choosing between several different houses “I watch the show all the time. Once I began my house-hunting process, I knew immediately that I wanted to be on the show,” she says. She sent the show’s producers an e-mail, and they asked for details about her


HOME & GARDEN

BOILING SPRINGS’ PORSCHA DAVIS APPEARED ON HGTV’S “HOUSE HUNTERS” IN JANUARY. BELOW, IS THE HOME SHE PURCHASED.

REALTOR KALISHA BRUSTER, LEFT, WITH PORSCHA.

story and the kind of house she was looking for. They also asked Davis and her Realtor, Kalisha Bruster of Agent Pros Realty, to send in a video that showcased their personalities. “They have thousands of people apply, and they picked us,” Bruster says. The episode detailed how Davis was looking for a home in the $100,000 range, but she didn’t want to sacrifice quality. She also wanted to have a one-story, ranch-style home that would be easily accessible when her mom, who is a double amputee, visits. She wanted her home to have that “wow factor” and curb appeal. The HGTV crew first came to Spartanburg last May and again in the summer. They chronicled Davis’ house-hunting as she narrowed her choices down to three. The filming process went on for about 12 hours a day over several weekends. “The crew was awesome. They were a lot of fun,” Davis says. “They were nice and very professional. They were excited for us,” Bruster adds. Spartanburg also received some publicity from the show.

HGTV filmed scenes that included Cleveland Park’s lake and City Range restaurant. “Spartanburg looked very good on the show. It portrayed Spartanburg in a very positive light,” Bruster says. In fact, HGTV staff members told Davis and Bruster that they’d love to profile another Spartanburg County househunter in the future and focus on a different price range. Davis decided to buy a home in a Boiling Springs subdivision and has loved being a homeowner. “She ended up with everything she needed and most of what she wanted,” Bruster says. She also stayed in her price range. Davis has the one-story ranch-style home that she wanted and has had a ramp installed so it’s more accessible for her mom. She also has the garage that she wanted to make sure her mom had an easier path from her car in bad weather. As beautiful as her home already is, Davis has added her own touches such as recessed lighting and ceiling fans. She loves the family-oriented feel of her community, where

children and adults spend time outside and neighbors pass by as they walk their dogs. It makes for a welcoming sight as she returns home from work and is the perfect setting for her to walk her dog, Diamond. It’s a neighborhood where everybody knows everybody, she says. Davis hopes that her experience serves as inspiration for other first-time homebuyers. Online comments and feedback from people who recognize her from the show have been very positive, she says. “A lot of people were shocked that you could get a house that nice at that price. By my story, I’ve encouraged others to want to become involved in the process,” she says.

SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY u FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 27


Shower Steamers Tutorial - super fun & easy to make! Shower Steamers are a great way to add a variety of fragrances to your shower for a little aromatherapy. Place the steamer on the floor of the shower opposite the shower head so that the steam and shower mist gently hits it. Feeling sick? Add some fragrances along with herbs and mints. Need energy? How about an orange or rosemary fragrance? Need to relax? How about a lavender fragrance oil? The possibilities are endless! Large Bath Bomb Mold (4 cavities) Citric Acid (1 cup) Baking Soda (2 cups) Royal Blue Mica Body Safe Fragrance Oil .15 cc scoop

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28 FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 u SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY

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HEALTH & WELLNESS

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Identifying the enemy in a caregiver role By Pat Snyder When a catastrophic diagnosis hits your family and you become a caregiver for a close family member, you are likely overwhelmed on a number of fronts---emotional, physical, and financial. This happened to me when my husband, John, was diagnosed in 2007 with Lewy Body Disease (LBD), a combination of dementia and Parkinson’s disease and the second most common form of dementia. Identifying the enemy in your new role as caregiver is vital to handling it well and not being consumed by it. So who or what is your enemy--and who is not? Many folks run into relationship problems soon after becoming the primary caregiver. This may occur when family members disappoint you by not helping as you had assumed they would. It may also happen with medical professionals who are not up to date with the most effective methods for treating your loved one. Regardless of how it may feel at times, these folks are NOT your enemy. Your real enemies are the disease itself, stress, and guilt. Let’s look at these one at a time.

The Disease

The disease is easy to identify as an enemy. It is hurting your loved one. Learn everything you can about it, especially the stage of it that you are currently fighting. What are the best available treatments out there? Are they offered where you live? If not, then where? Is it worth it to participate in an experimental program if current treatments

are not working? Can you schedule medications in a better way to reduce side effects and negative interactions? Are there triggers which may make the symptoms worse? Researching these things and connecting with other caregivers are appropriate and proactive steps you can take to help you feel more in control of your life again. Become an expert on this disease. Partner with all the medical professionals as coach of the team for your loved one. The more you know, the more respect you will gain. And move to another doctor if you are not respected and heard by the current one. Good ones are out there; you just have to hunt for them.

Stress

Stress is the subtle, sometimes deadly enemy that many caregivers do not recognize. I have become convinced that controlling stress is a key to managing effective caregiving. Everything works better when stress is minimized. Learn to sense the presence of stress. Then learn how to neutralize it. My first tip for stress control is one that has worked for me over and over again. •

Choose the lesserstressor when there is an option for how to do something. Set your internal radar to sense stress in its many forms, such as hurt, fear, worry, or frustration. Use common sense techniques to lessen its power over you, like naming the feeling out loud or taking a couple of


• • •

• •

• • • •

long, deep breaths. Get counseling and learn more stress reduction techniques. Pray and connect yourself to praying people who will support you. If you are cramming too much into your day, streamline your schedule. Simplify. Learn to say, “No.” Focus on the here and now. If you can stay in the moment, you will find that your stress level drops significantly. Eliminate people from your daily routine who are negative or draining. Prioritize what you need to do in your day, choosing the important over the urgent when you can. Then work that plan. Laugh every chance you get. Be with those who bring you laughter. Make time for yourself to recharge your batteries. Exercise. Organize your financial matters to simplify when and where you pay your bills.

• •

Work with your pharmacist to get all prescriptions filled on the same day of the month. Pay for what you cannot or should not do yourself or find someone who will volunteer to do them for you. Leave guilt behind.

Guilt

Guilt is the other subtle and sometimes deadly enemy for many caregivers. When you are giving all you know how to give, you simply must let yourself off the hook. If you think about it, what is the payoff for feeling guilty? I cannot think of one thing in this context that is positive or productive about guilt. It definitely does not make you a better caregiver! But it surely can

make you a worse one. Since it drains you of energy, you will have less to give, which will only make you feel guiltier. So recognize it for what it is---a trap and energy drainer---and then tell yourself that you are not falling for that trap. Period. The only exception to this is if you are doing neglectful or hurtful things that cause unnecessary pain for your loved one. It may help you to have a trusted person or two in whom you can confide and who will give you feedback about inevitable choices you will be forced to make in your caregiving journey. Listen to them. They will help you to know when you are beating up on yourself and falling into the guilt trap. If you can master these three enemies, even in part, you will feel more peace and more satisfaction in your caregiving season. And you will be better able to see it as just that—a season that most people will experience at some point in their lives. Pat Snyder is the author of Treasures in the Darkness: Extending the Early Stage of LBD, Alzheimer’s, and Parkinson’s Disease. You can find her book on Amazon.com.

Dr. Walter J. Kucaba Conventional and Mini Dental Implants for Dentures, Bridges and Single Tooth Replacements Appliances to help stop snoring and CPAP intolerant Cosmetic Treatments for gum recession and gummy smiles Surgical & Non-Surgical Treatment for Gum Disease

Because experience matters! 864-585-0468 www.scdental.net

www.isnore.net www.minidentalimplants.net SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY u FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 31

HEALTH & WELLNESS


HEALTH & WELLNESS

Are You a Mind Reader? By Terry L. Ledford, Ph.D. Do you believe that you are a mind reader? Do you assume what others are thinking or feeling? Do you react to your assumptions as if they are fact? Do you believe with all your being that you are right in those assumptions? Are your moods determined by your mind reading? If you are honest with yourself, you will have to answer yes to all the above questions. It is a rare human being that has attained that degree of wisdom, self-discipline or enlightenment required to never assume another’s thoughts or feelings. When you assume other’s thoughts, intentions or feelings without having all the facts, you are mind reading. So, let’s start with the admission that we all do mind reading. We observe another’s facial expression and assume that he or she is angry or displeased with us. We see someone hesitate when we voice an invitation and assume that they don’t really want to spend time with us. We listen for the tone of voice or inflection and believe the person is irritated, disapproving or displeased. We observe apparent distance and conclude that they don’t love us (or at least don’t love us as much as we love them). Our mind reading assumptions allow us to fill in the missing information in our social interactions, but is it accurate information or misinformation? How often are our mind reading assumptions simply wrong? Inaccurate mind reading assumptions may fill our emotional sails, pushing us forward quickly, but unfortunately pushing us off course. We often make decisions and choices based on those assumptions. If the assumptions are wrong, the choices will also be wrong.

When we do mind reading assumptions, we do so based on our expectations. We could have expectations based on the particular individual’s prior behavior. If Uncle Henry has tended to be critical in the past, we assume that the ambiguous statement he made today was said with critical intent. We may also have expectations based on our prior experiences with other people. If Cindy felt rejected in her previous high school, she will expect to be rejected at the new high school. If Jeff ’s parents were critical and difficult-to-please, he may perceive his current supervisors to be critical and displeased with him. The correct answer to the question about what someone is thinking is “I don’t know” because that is the truth. When we assume we know another’s thoughts or feelings, we act on those assumptions and we close the door to other possibilities. When we remind ourselves that we actually don’t know what they are thinking, we leave the doors open for all possibilities. Try to catch yourself doing mind reading. Remind yourself that you don’t actually know what other people are thinking. Avoiding such assumptions will be most helpful in your relationships and your personal mental health. Dr. Ledford is the author of “Parables for a Wounded Heart: Overcoming Your Self-Esteem Wounds and Transforming Your Perception of You.” He practices at Woodridge Psychological Associates in Rutherfordton, NC.

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Treatment for these conditions with an oral appliance can give you more than your life back. Besides helping to prevent heart attacks, strokes and even death, oral appliances in some cases might be able to get rid of your CPAP.

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It might be all you that need to get the sleep you require and back in bed with the one you love!


HEALTH & WELLNESS HealtH & Wellness

Our Services...

Dental Treatment for kids ages 1-17 Infant Oral Exams/Consultations Mouth Guards For Sports Limited Orthodontics and Specialty Appliances

Office Hours:

Monday - Thursday 8am-5pm

Check us out on Facebook! info@spartanburgpediatric.com 1575 Skylyn Drive Spartanburg, 29307

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What We’re All About

Getting back to his roots, Dr. Birch has returned to his hometown of Spartanburg to open his own Pediatric Dental office. He and his staff have been caring for the needs of children in the area since opening his office in January of 2010. At Spartanburg Pediatirc Dentistry we care about your child. Dr. Birch and his staff are committed to helping your child feel comfortable and relaxed while meeting each individual’s dental needs. Dr. Birch even brings his dogs, Yazzy and Taco, to the office

to cheer the kids on after their dental treatment. Even if it’s just to say hello from afar, it’s a fun twist to a normal dental appointment. Yazzy and Taco can’t wait to see your beautiful smile! Spartanburg Pediatric Dentistry has grown with the community as well as at home. Dr. Birch and his wife, Dr. Amy Birch, were so excited to welcome their little boy, Charlie, this past year. Come and meet our family, we would love to take care of your dental needs!

SPARTANBURGEVERYDAY.COM •

37


HEALTH & WELLNESS

Down in the Mouth

Dental and Oral Health: Relationship to General Health

April / May edition

By Dr. Walter J. Kucaba, D.D.S., M.S. A variety of medical conditions such as diabetes, heart disease, HIV, and adverse outcomes of pregnancy have associations with oral health. In addiWalter J. Kucaba, tion, the nutritional status of an individual also impacts oral health. In fact, D.D.S., M.S. a two-way interaction between nutrition and oral health has been observed. of the Academy of Dental Sleep Medicine Diseases of the oral cavity, as well as other Member systemic diseases that have an impact on oral health, can affect an individual’s ability to eat and hence affect Life Member of the American his/her nutritional status. On the other hand, if the nutritional status of Academy of Periodontology an individual is compromised, it may negatively influence their oral health development. It may also impact the severity of oral diseases as well as their rate of recovery. The associations between nutrition, medical status, and oral health have highlighted an important connection between dental and systemic health.

Oral Health and Diabetes

Poorly controlled or uncontrolled diabetes result in high blood sugar levels as well as increased amounts of sugar in saliva. This can lead to complications that put the individual at increased risk for oral conditions such as: • Xerostomia (dry mouth) • Periodontal disease • Dental Caries • Gingivitis • Infections • Candidiasis • Burning Mouth Syndrome Dry mouth can lead to difficulty in chewing, tasting and swallowingthese problems can adversely affect nutrient intake. Young persons with diabetes my have a higher incidence of dental caries due to reduced flow of saliva (a consequence of dry mouth). Keeping blood sugar levels in control helps prevent complications arising from dry mouth. The relationship between diabetes and periodontal disease is two-way. While poorly controlled diabetes raises the susceptibility to periodontal disease, having periodontal disease increases the difficulty of achieving good blood glucose control in people with diabetes. Procedures such as dental surgery or fitting dentures requires adequate control of blood sugar in order to be successful.

Dr. Walt Kucaba of Spartanburg specializes in the treatment of gum disease and placement of Dental implants to replace missing teeth and stabilize dentures. He may be reached at 864-585-0468. www.scdental.net www.minidentalimplants.net 34 FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 u SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY

Ask for us by name! Professional hospice care … the way it’s meant to be

Call now to schedule a Hospice House tour!

864.457.9100

260 Fairwinds Road • Landrum, SC 29356 hocf@hocf.org • www.hocf.org


HEALTH & WELLNESS

HealtH & Wellness

By Harvey J. Kulka

Search is on for S.C.’s Outstanding Senior Volunteer Every day South Carolina senior volunteers generously give their time and service to help others. Now here’s your chance to give back by nominating a deserving older adult in your community for his or her outstanding service through the Salute to Senior Service® program. You see, today’s modern seniors are volunteering in big numbers and in big ways and the results are all positive. These senior volunteers are engaged with churches, schools, hospitals, senior centers and other nonprofit organizations doing hands-on projects; preparing, collecting or distributing food; or providing companionship. Sponsored by Home Instead, Inc., the franchisor of the Home Instead Senior Care® network, Salute to Senior Service recognizes the invaluable contributions of adults age 65 and older who give at least 15 hours a month of volunteer service to their favorite causes. Seniors have so much to give and make a positive impact on our communities daily. Senior volunteerism not only benefits others, but also helps seniors stay active and socially engaged in their communities – important elements of healthy aging. Members of the community are asked to nominate and vote for these everyday heroes between Jan. 15 and March 1, 2014, at SalutetoSeniorService.com. State winners will be determined by popular vote. A panel of senior care experts will then select a national Salute to Senior Service winner from among the state honorees. Home Instead, Inc. will donate $500 to each of the state winners’ designated and approved nonprofit organizations, and their personal stories will be shared online on the Salute to Senior Service Wall of Fame. In addition, $5,000 will be donated to the national winner’s designated and approved nonprofit charity. To complete and submit an online nomination form for a senior age 65 or older who volunteers at least 15 hours a month, and to view the contest’s official rules, visit SalutetoSeniorService.com. Completed nomination forms can alternatively be mailed to Salute to Senior Service, P.O. Box 285, Bellevue, NE 68005. If you aren’t a volunteer already and thinking that you want to get involved in this wonderful community service, ask at your place of worship, or contact your local non-profit organizations or senior center for ideas. It’s likely they have a whole host of opportunities just waiting for someone like you to step forward. There are many ways to get involved and you can contribute as little or as much time as you have available. If you are interested in receiving our monthly e-mail newsletter, visit our website, www. homeinstead.com/768 , scroll to the bottom of the page and sign-up. It’s free and a great way to learn valuable tips on caring for your aging loved one, Home Instead Senior Care is the national leader in providing in-home, non-medical care for seniors. Helping seniors is something Home Instead has been doing passionately now for almost 20 years. Harvey Kulka and his wife Julie own and operate the Home Instead Office in Spartanburg. Harvey Kulka is the host of the Home Instead Hour from 9:00 am to 10:00 am every Saturday morning on WOLI 910am and 105.7fm or streaming worldwide at www.woliam.com.

Home Instead Senior Care 2811 Reidville Rd. Unit 21 Spartanburg, SC, 29301 (864) 699-9525 e-mail: Harvey.kulka@homeinstead.com

Facebook.com/ HomeInsteadSpartanburg

48 •Spartanburg Everyday • Volume 3, Issue 14 • December/January

HomeInstead.com/768 Retired dancing queen seeks passionate helper for tasks around the house.

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All CAREGivers are bonded & Insured Each Home Instead Senior Care® office is independently owned and operated. © 2014 Home Instead, Inc.

SPARTANBURG EVERYDAY u FEBRUARY/MARCH 2014 35


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