Volume 45, Issue 3, November 19, 2014

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estoque MONTA VISTA HIGH SCHOOL ELESTOQUE.ORG

NOVEMBER 19, 2014 ISSUE III, VOLUME XLV

Victims of abuse suffer in silence

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NEWS

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Leaving a legacy After nine years, college and career center liason Miriam Taba retires

New language, new voice Three perspectives on English Language Learning at MVHS

We can fix this Out of the blue

OPINION

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I say, they say Regardless of cultural causes, child abuse is unjustifiable

Are you abused?

Where discipline becomes abuse in the eyes of the law

What now?

Options to deal with an abusive household

Please, just leave On higher ground

Dear anonymous, “Withholding a name will only occur in rare cases when a student’s safety is in danger, if it is required by law, or in the event that the Editorial Board deems it appropriate.”

Our staff policy takes a clear stance on the use of anonymous sources — they are only meant to be used sparingly and only in extreme cases. This is one of those cases.

Domestic abuse is an issue that divides our community. We all come from different places that shape the way we see and interact with the world around us. Our staff editorial this month (page 12) goes into these cultural stigmas in great detail, explaining that our upbringings define our outlook on the fine line 2

between discipline and abuse.

And by the nature of the parent-child relationship, the abused find themselves unable to speak up out of fear of harsher punishment.

Trauma, especially when it comes from those who are our mentors, our keepers, our parents is not an easy topic to speak up about.

We are taught to honor our parents, to believe that what they do is for our own good.

That in 10, 20, 30 years we’ll look back at them and thank them despite our suffering in this moment. How do we as teenagers have the life experience to question our elders, to affirm that we know the line between right and wrong better than those who raised us?

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A&E

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Decoded Dress code subjectivity debate

Poppin’ tags Are the deals worth the trouble on Black Friday

Old sport Exchange student shines on stage

Walk a mile in my shoes The stories shoes tell

No, shave this November She’s the man

Placing any serious blame on our parents is extremely uncomfortable, something we are conditioned not to do.

This is why we ultimately supported reporter junior Kristin Chang’s story (page 25), despite its heavy dependence on the word of a single student. We believe that it is a voice that must be heard and that there would be no other way that this student’s could be heard.

This boy’s story speaks to a pervasive problem that is too often ignored and put off as the status-quo in our community.

Unfortunately, that’s not a dynamic we can change. We’re just a group of high school students; we can’t force all the parents in our EL ESTOQUE

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estoque

21840 McClellan Road Cupertino, CA 95014 mv.el.estoque@gmail.com

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SPECIAL REPORT

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Behind closed doors The narrative of a child abuse victim

When should CPS respond immediately Immediate response situations

Power and control progression Common types of abuse

SPORTS

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community to change the values that they grew up believing in. And we can’t keep them from imparting those values onto their children.

But what we can do is tell the story of one boy — a boy who represents more than just himself — and give him the freedom to tell his story without the fear of further repercussions. More than telling a story, each of us can still make a difference in the lives of those around us. We have an obligation to stand for our friends.

Especially when they suffer in silence.

Out of their league Football team finds difficulty in new league

Organized chaos Athletic trainer navigates hectic field

Taking a break Yearlong competition risks ACL tears

Outside the line

Rookie of the Year

What’s in your bag?

Junior Anshu Jain opens up about football gear

Editors-in-Chief: Nathan Desai, Daniel Fernandez Managing Editors: Yifei Wu, Kathleen Yuan Copy Editors: Rahul Iyer, Jady Wei, Varsha Venkat Webmaster: Varsha Venkat News Editors: Elia Chen, Maya Murthy, Dylan Tsai Sports Editors: Alina Abidi, Amol Pande, Malini Ramaiyer Entertainment Editors: Christine Liang, Sarah Ramos, Lydia Seo Opinion Editors: Gabriella Monico, Pranav Parthasarathy Special Report Editors: Kristin Chang, Harini Shyamsundar, Mingjie Zhong Beats Editors: Ashmita Chakraborty, Avni Prasad Photo Editors: Justin Kim, Aditya Pimplaskar Design Editor: Rhonda Mak Graphics Editors: Rhonda Mak, Sharon Tung Business Editors: Claire Lu, Sarah Weinberg Staff Writers: Rabina Bisht, Brandon Chin, Aditi Desai, Brian Fan, Kalpana Gopalkrishnan, Pranav Iyer, Pranav Jandhyala, Trisha Kholiya, Elliot Ki, Anjana Melvin, Sanjana Murthy, Vishal Nagar, Jyotsna Natarajan, Colin Ni, Neha Patchipala, Vanessa Qin, Anushka Tyagi, Joshua Tsuei, Emily Zhao Adviser: Michelle Balmeo Credits Some images in this publication were taken from the stock photography website sxc.hu.

Mission Statement El Estoque is an open forum created for and by students of Monta Vista High School. Opinions expressed in this publication are those of the journalism staff and not of Monta Vista High School or the Fremont Union High School District. The staff seeks to recognize individuals, events, and ideas and bring news to the MVHS community in a manner that is professional, unbiased, and thorough in order to effectively serve our readers. We strive to report accurately, and we will correct any significant error. If you believe such an error has been made, please contact us. Letters of any length should be submitted via email or mail. They may be edited for length or accuracy. Letters cannot be returned and will be published at El Estoque’s discretion. We also reserve the right to reject advertising due to space limitations or decision of the Editorial Board that content of the advertisement conflicts with the mission of the publication.

NATHAN DESAI AND DANIEL FERNANDEZ LETTER FROM THE EDITORS

n.desai@elestoque.org | d.fernandez@elestoque.org

NOVEMBER 19, 2014

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NEWS

Leaving a Legacy After nine years, College and Career Center Liaison Miriam Taba retires

BY CLAIRE LU

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visit to the College and Ca- ing, volunteer, academic, employment and ognize the nuances between colleges so that they make the right decision. Since she arreer Center in A102 can be college information. overwhelming — with college Taba, along with Ota, played a major role rived, Taba has noticed an upward trend of flags and posters adorning its in establishing the foundation of the current students applying to liberal arts schools.

Taba acknowledges that often, students walls, it’s easy to get lost in all College and Career Center, helping to transequate “lesser-known” with “less prestithe information. fer materials and create a forum for all colgious.” However, she believes that the intiBehind the desk at the back of the room lege and career-related questions. mate intellectual environment that liberal sits College and Career Center Liaison Miriarts schools offer allows students to receive am Taba. Unassuming and soft-spoken, Taba Finding the Perfect Fit personalized attention. gently guides students through everything, One of the most important ideas Taba from PSAT registration dates to medical in- leaves behind is the concept of finding “the Impact on Students ternship opportunities.

MVHS class of 2014 alumnus Molly Vora, perfect fit.” Throughout her nine years at Taba has worked for the past nine years to MVHS, Taba has introduced students to currently in Boston University’s seven-year ensure a smoothly running College and Ca- lesser known and newer colleges that may medical program, is grateful for Taba’s adreer Center. While her role is mainly clerical not have the prestige and name brand of the vice in applying for scholarships and choosing which school to attend. Deciding bework, such as organizing college representatween many different colleges across tive visits and fielding calls, her the country, Taba guided her through impacts have been tangible to I’ll definitely miss the people the decision-making process. many students on campus. This Before coming to Taba, Vora was most. Students here are so indecisive December, Taba will retire, leavand confused. While iniing behind a legacy of nine years incredible. I am fortunate to tially elated over her acceptances, of college and career advising. the exuberance soon wore away as work with you all. she realized she could only pick one College and Career Center Liaison Miriam Taba school.

Her Inspiration “I was so conflicted,” Vora said.

Taba’s daughter and son, Kim“I talked with her about deciding colleges, berly and Brian, were MVHS alumni of the “Top 50” colleges, but all have qualities that and she helped me come to a conclusion by class of 1998 and 1995, respectively. When may be the right fit for some students. En- weighing the pros and cons of each deciher children were students, Taba volunteered couraging students to focus more on “fit,” sion.” at “Career Day” events, where she organized Taba keeps a copy of Loren Pope’s “Colleges With an older sister at UC Berkeley, Vora 2,500 students into five career sections, del- that Change Lives” on her desk. was also concerned about financing her colegated tasks and recruited speakers in variTaba uses the book, which profiles 40 lib- lege education, and Taba introduced her to ous career fields. eral arts colleges that are lesser known, in potential scholarships, both community and Often, Taba spent her time with former order to recommend schools to students who national.

Career and College Center Liaison Alice may be uncertain of where to apply. Schools Ota, who brainstormed the idea for a dedi- like Babson College, Lesley University and A hurdle in the road Bentley University, while not widely known Two years ago, Taba encountered a blip cated space for college and career advice. to MVHS students, are some of Taba’s fa- during her time at MVHS. After her annual Before the center was officially established, vorites. In addition to contacting the schools mammogram screening, Taba was contacted all college brochures, pamphlets and test themselves for more information, Taba has by doctors and notified that she had breast prep books were organized along a shelf in welcomed certain schools in Pope’s book to cancer. Thankfully, because the breast canthe corner of the library. Eventually there MVHS, such as Reed College, whose repre- cer was detected early, the tumor was not was enough student interest that administra- sentative came in October. particularly developed, or malignant.

It is important to Taba that students rec“I think I was fortunate that I didn’t miss tion dedicated a room to scholarship, test4

EL ESTOQUE

NOVEMBER 19, 2014

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Schools all over the country from Ivy League schools to liberal arts send Taba college pennants.

Even after retiring, Taba will continue to search for scholarship and job opportunities.

The bulletin board lists important information and dates for seniors.

much school, considering I had six rounds of chemotherapy every three weeks, and five weeks of radiation five days of the week.”

Many of her treatment sessions coincided with school breaks, which allowed her time to recover and relax. On weeks without school breaks, hospitals were able to accommodate Taba at 7 a.m. so that Taba would only miss 15 to 30 minutes of school.

Former assistant principal Brad Metheany, Taba’s supervisor at the time, was understanding of Taba’s schedule because his own wife had undergone cancer. A supportive administrator, Metheany was sensitive to Taba’s needs and aware of the exhaustion that accompanies chemotherapy. As the radiation and chemo sessions grew lengthier, Taba found it more difficult to run simple errands.

Simply walking from the staff parking lot to her office was a challenge; her only relief was that sitting alleviated her exhaustion.

The most shocking part of Taba’s battle with cancer was her hair loss. “[Nurses] told me that due to my treatment, I was going to lose my hair,” Taba said. “But it didn’t really hit me until one day I was combing through my hair, and a whole clump fell out.”

Shocked, Taba decided to purchase a wig to wear for the remainder of the year.

“It was a nice color and style for me.”

Taba said, with a laugh. “People who didn’t know that I was going through [cancer]

Taba’s bookshelf has books on College Guidance and Standardized Test Prep.

asked me who my hairdresser was!”

By summer, her hair had started to grow back, and she stopped using the wig.

Chemotherapy also came with the side effects of foods and liquids tasting like metal.

“Everything tasted terrible,” Taba said.

“Especially sweet things, such as cookies.

And I usually love cookies.”

She also began to lose feeling in her fingertips, an effect called neuropathy. Neuropathy often causes a prickly, tingling sensation in one’s fingertips that makes it hard to grip objects. Unfortunately, Taba still deals with the lingering side effects of neuropathy, which takes around two years to fade away.

Despite her condition, Taba never felt frightened about her future.

“It partly stems from the nature of who I am,” Taba said. “I could still get worse, whether or not I worry. So why worry?”

Taba’s most recent visit to the oncologist revealed that her tumor was gone.

Saying Goodbye While Taba is looking forward to more personal time with family and friends and a more relaxed schedule, she remains nostalgic about her time here.

“I’ll definitely miss the people most,” Taba said. “Students here are so incredible. I am fortunate to work with you all.”

The passion, determination, and diligence of MVHS students and staff never fails to in-

spire Taba, even after nine years.

Le-Xuan Cao, the new College and Career Center advisor, will continue Taba’s legacy by carrying on Taba’s own visions for the center in the future.

“The [center], ideally, will be a one stop shop for the students,” Cao said. “I want them to feel comfortable and ask questions.

No matter how silly the question is, it is never to silly to ask.”

Cao also hopes to introduce changes such as monthly virtual guidance newsletters and revamping the guidance website.

Although Taba will be shedding her role as liaison, she hopes to come back and volunteer at the center. One of the causes she has dedicated herself to during her time at MVHS is finding scholarships for students.

“A school of such high-achieving students...students deserve to know more about such opportunities,” Taba said. “Sometimes, students are so focused on prestige that they forget about financing education.”

In regards to her personal life, Taba hopes that leaving the Center will allow her to spend time with her 98 year-old mother-inlaw, as well as her two grandchildren. She also looks forward to reading, picking up sewing and finding new recipes.

“I’m from a big family, and I was always the baker in the family. I’d bake a batch of cookies but they would all be gone.” Taba says, laughing. “Now I’ll have time to bake.” c.lu@elestoque.org

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EL ESTOQUE

NEWS

NEW LANGUAGE, NEW VOICE

BY NEHA PATCHIPALA, DYLAN TSAI AND YIFEI WU

The English Language Development program is an educational program dedicated to helping English Learners by providing language support and cultural exposure. Sophomore Betty Huang, a current English Learner, Stacey Cler, a sheltered literature teacher and class of 2014 ASB Social Manager Colin Kim, a former English Learner, share their journeys and show that language is not a barrier to success.

Photo used with permission of Colin Kim.

Left photo: alumnus Colin KIm and senior Nish Ullagaddi participating at the 2013 Purple and Gold rally.

Right photo: Kim in the red shirt poses with his ELD teacher I-Chen Wu and John Muir Elementary school’s graduation.

Photo used with permission of Colin Kim.

Bit and Parts of Culture English teacher Stacey Cler has been teaching English Learners for 15 years and this year, is teaching a sheltered World Literature course. Cler teaches the same curriculum that she would teach in a non-sheltered course, but with a different approach.

Cler spends more time defining vocabulary and modifies the reading level of the information to match the language level of her students. Cler also breaks down many of the concepts so that her students can better understand the material. Despite the fact that English Learners are not as fluent in English, Cler holds them to the same standards as her non-sheltered students.

“Any [English Learner] is just as capable of doing the same thing that anybody in a regular class can do,” Cler said. “And I always contend that.”

Having a smaller class has allowed Cler to experiment with technology as a way to 8

get information across to her students. She creates a class Google document, which she projects onto the board and her students can type their notes on while discussing a certain topic. This technique enables her to check for students’ understanding.

Cler is met with many cultural struggles when it comes to interacting with English Learners. Students who come from China, Japan, and Korea are taught to not consider the Internet as intellectual property and are therefore subliminally encouraged to plagiarize information. Explaining why they are not allowed to present this information as their own without citations or quotations is one of the many challenges that Cler has faced.

“For us it is such a black and white issue, but for a kid that is from a different country, you have to really look at it from a differentperspective,” Cler said.

Teaching English Learners has allowed Cler to teach students what it means to be an American as most of these students miss

out on the meaning of holidays such as Halloween, Thanksgiving, and Christmas. She feels a sense of responsibility to make these students feel welcome and introduce them to aspects of the American culture.

In fact, two years ago, her teaching assistants brought American food staples such as smoothies, Twinkies, nachos and Ho Hos to class almost every Tuesday as an attempt to expose the students to new foods. Cler enjoyed her students’ expressions when trying these new delights.

“I will always remember the looks on their faces when they drank [the smoothies] because they tried [them] and they just didn’t know what to think,” Cler said.

She considers helping English Learners transition from not being able to communicate at all to then being able to express themselves a humbling gift as this process allows her to understand her students’ personalities.

EL ESTOQUE

Two Different Roles She stared straight in front of her, her round brown eyes fixed on one point at the audience. She raised her hand, groping the air surrounding her, the big sleeves of her dress shivering in the slight breeze created by the Air Conditioner in the black box. It was sophomore, then a freshman, Betty Huang’s end of the year drama performance.

Her role was Helen Keller, a role that does not require much memorizing of lines.

Huang has been in the ELD program since freshman year, when she took ELD 1. The role of Helen Keller marked the end of her first year in drama, but her journey in MVHS continues.

Huang still remembers the process of rehearsing Helen Keller. Instead of focusing on memorizing long lines, Huang needed to practice staring at one spot for a long time and expressing emotions through a few simple gestures.

“I enjoy the role because it’s actually harder than [the ones] that have a lot of lines,” Huang said.

Yet she is not so happy about the fact that she has never got a role in drama that has many lines — oftentimes others would shove a role to her, according to Huang.

“I feel weird,” Huang said. “It’s almost like I’m not as good as them.”

She did not outwardly express her discontent, yet she experienced an outburst of emotions during one of the rehearsals when she was suddenly on the verge of tears, and rushed out of the drama classroom. Loneliness, homesickness, indignation, Huang could not quite identify the reason of her sudden tears.

On the other hand, ELD class seems like a safety zone for her. During her ELD class, Huang feels more secure because most of the classmates have been in ELD 1 with her during freshman year. The class is also smaller, so each student will receive more help. Huang often talks to her teacher, Lindsay Stuart, privately after class about things going on at home and in school.

She even expressed her joy of being the

Visit http://www. elestoque.org/ELD for more stories

“older sister” of her ELD class that combines ELD 1 students with ELD 2 students.

Familiarity with the course and her classmates made her more confident.

“I feel like now even when I’m walking [in the classroom], I raise my head high,” Huang said.

This confidence extends into her sheltered classes, Chemistry and Literature, but stops at her regular class, Algebra 2. Even though the class material is easy for Huang, she rarely talks during the class and prefers to stay out of the conversation of students around her in regular classes. She does not quite know why.

“I’m the quiet one in math,” Huang said.

“But I’m okay because it’s only one class.”

Kim.

Left photo: sophomore Betty Huang fills out her section preference form for her next drama preformance on Nov. 14 in drama class. Right photo: Huang acts in the MVHS performance of the play Helen Keller.

Photo used with permission of Betty Huang.

Vishalrathna Nagar | El Estoque

Becoming a Leader Eight years ago, former ASB Social Manager and El Estoque staff member, class of 2014 alumnus Colin Kim, was sitting in a fifth grade class at John Muir Elementary School. He was sitting with around 15 others, listening to their teacher, Mrs. Wu. Kim remembers that Wu made every student in the class feel at ease: she was calm enough to make 10-year-olds settle down, patient enough to teach the kids grammar and vocabulary, accepting enough of the students’ differences when introducing foreign cultural aspects. She was also Asian — just like the teachers they grew up with. After fifth grade, most of Kim’s friends in the class went to Hyde Middle School, but Kim went to Kennedy Middle School. He was one of the only students in his class to graduate from the ELD program.

“I wanted to join the regular classes and the regular sessions after the first year,” Kim said. “If you’re in ELD, you tend to want to NOVEMBER 19, 2014

stay in ELD because those are your friends.

For me, it was different. I really liked [ELD], but I wanted to explore and be in different social groups, and get involved in school activities.”

While Kim was excited to explore new social groups he lacked confidence in his ability to speak English and struggled to converse with other students outside of the ELD program.

“You’ve got to imagine how a student would feel in an environment where people are telling you things but you can’t really understand what they’re saying ,” Kim said.

“The frustration you have when you want to talk to them, but you can’t, because you don’t know how to respond to them.”

American culture was as foreign to Kim as the language. In Korea, Thanksgiving takes place on a different day. There are no celebrations on July 4. Koreans do not Trick-or-Treat or make Jack-O-Lanterns and Americans never celebrate Children’s Day.

“Holidays and all the culture is different, but it was cool for me and I got used to it,” Kim said. “It definitely helps to find friends.”

By his freshman year, however, Kim felt comfortable enough in the U.S. to run for class officer. He did not win. But, in his sophomore year, he was elected as Class of 2014’s Social Manager, followed by the same position in junior year and in senior year, he was elected to be Social Manager for ASB. “Throughout the whole journey, I really wanted to just go back home to Korea,” Kim said, “but you just have to have that mindset to try to put yourself out there and get out of your comfort zone. Then you can actually make things work.” n.patchipala@elestoque.org l d.tsai@elestoque.org l y.wu@elestoqu.org

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NEWS

The Bike Problem Revaluting bike safety in light of recent tragedy

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or all three years of middle school, my best friend would call me at 8 a.m. to see if I was ready to go to school.

If I was drinking my milk, we would both leave our houses at 8:05, and if she was eating her breakfast we would leave at 8:07.

Regardless, at about 8:12, we would find each other at Lincoln Elementary School’s teacher parking lot and bike down the path in between Lincoln and MVHS, eventually turning left on Hyannisport Dr. to start Round One of our own personal Mario Kart.

You laugh, but that’s pretty much the best approximation I can give you for what Hyannisport was like for a 12-year-old biker at 8:15 in the morning. And, to tell the truth, I’m awful at Mario Kart.

It’s funny that we used to make a game out of our numerous near death instances.

We’d go careening in and out of bumper-tobumper traffic because we were too old for the sidewalk, and of course, even attempting to bike on campus would result in a P.E. teacher taking our bikes “forever and ever, and don’t you dare think I won’t.”

So, faced with no other choice, we played Mario Kart with our lives every morning, glaring at drivers who were inches from shoving us into the pavement, making up names for one driver in particular that seemed to loathe our very existence, even as she nudged us so close to the sidewalk that I was thrown off my bike when my bike tire was caught in the gutter.

I managed to survive, though at some points, only by the skin of my teeth. I personally only managed to twist my left ankle once, and scraped my entire right knee very early in the game, though every day, it seemed like I was avoiding collisions in new and terrifying combinations.

Every day, I woke up and talked to my best friend, knowing but not realizing the danger that one wrong move could present.

I joked about cars that refused to acknowledge my presence on the road, cataloguing the nearest misses to tell to my parents, not realizing how pale they turned when they listened to how

In 2009, 91 percent of bicyclists killed reportedly were not wearing helmets.

Helmets.org

Students have been involved in six bicycle accidents since the start of the school year.

CBS SF Bay Area

The total cost of bicyclist injury and death is more than $4 billion per year.

National Safety Council

many times their little girl could have died in the past week. I was lucky, something I never seemed to realize until I heard about someone who wasn’t.

A few weeks ago, we mourned the loss of Ethan Wong, a sophomore biker who was killed by a big rig on McClellan Rd. The loss of his life was a tragedy, but it was definitely not an anomaly. It was almost certainly not just a freak of fate, nor a series of unfortunate events that stole the life of someone too young to die. It wasn’t, because every day, we let hundreds of students face the same fate on the road - biking in lanes too small, biking in the frenzied traffic of parents rushing to get their children to school on time, biking with their lives on the line because the area around the tri-school area is unsafe.

That lack of safety is a fact we all acknowledge, but a fact we also tend to ignore. There is no bike lane on Orange Ave., a street many of us use to get from Stevens Creek Dr. to MVHS. There is no bike lane on Hyannisport Dr., a street even more of us used to get to Kennedy Middle School.

In California, there is a law stating that cars have to keep a three foot distance from bikes on the road. I can tell you from personal experience, that many times it was probably more like three inches.

In the weeks since Ethan Wong’s death, my parents have stopped letting my brother bike to school, something he’s been doing since about second grade. Yet, as many other parent makes the same decision, the streets are even more crowded and congested, as every parent tries to stave off their worst nightmare for just one more day.

I think we all know that taking our bikes off the streets isn’t a long-term solution.

Eventually my parents will get tired of dropping my brother off, and he’ll be back to continuing the family tradition of swerving through traffic like Luigi at his finest.

I can only hope that eventually, he won’t have to.

MAYA MURTHY OUT OF THE BLUE

m.murthy@elestoque.org

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EL ESTOQUE

ABUSE OR DISCIPLINE A popular proverb reads: “Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you punish them with the rod, they will not die.� Philosophies like these equate discipline with physical punishment and consequently blur the line between discipline and abuse. They raise important questions we often shy away from confronting. Is it acceptable to be spanked? Is being locked in a room or denied food admissible?

Can our parents call us worthless? Unwanted? Some say yes. Others even call it tough love. Some call it discipline.

We call it abuse.

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Defining the cultural roots of abuse

Understanding how California defines abuse

Responding to parents in an abusive home

NOVEMBER 19, 2014

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OPINION

I SAY THEY SAY

Cultural factors don’t account for the effects of child abuse “It’s a cultural thing.” ore often than not, domestic abuse, especially in Cupertino, has cultural influences. A parent hitting a child because he or she got a D on a test is often deemed acceptable because it’s seen to be merely discipline.

In many cultures, predominantly Asian ones, a child is expected to respect his or her family by doing well in school and obeying his or her parents. The concept of “tough love” is used to justify harsh methods of discipline. “The more I hit you, the more I love you.” “The more I scold you, the more I care for you.”

However, what many fail to realize is that, although cultural upbringings influence disciplinary methods, in America, many traditional parenting methods that involve physical harassment are illegal.

A student at MVHS who wishes to remain anonymous lives in a household in which his mother constantly abuses him — she whips him with a belt and locks him in the bathroom. Countless times he’s heard those all too familiar insults: dumbass, idiot, useless. These jarring insults are often accompanied by a shriek-

M

for the development of borderline personality disorder, depression, anxiety, and other psychiatric disorders. One study using ACE data found that roughly 54 percent of cases of depression and 58 percent of suicide attempts in women were connected to adverse childhood experiences. Clearly, abuse is destructive, while discipline is meant to be constructive.

The law draws a definite line between abuse and discipline, and crossing the line has severe consequences. Acts of physical punishment are commonly believed to influence children to respect their elders and atone for their misbehavior, but the scarring effect of certain methods of discipline has latent effects.

Researchers have found higher levels of anger, hostility, fear and withdrawal, low self-esteem, and overall disconnect from youth that grew up in a violent household. Furthermore, 90 percent of abusive

ing reprimand and a slap in the face.

His mother justifies her abuse as discipline, a necessary precaution to ensure her son will live up to his full potential.

“It’s normal for parents to slap or scream or hit you,” the anonymous source said. “Especially when you’re ten and your grades are not good, or you’re not what they wanted.”

We accept these behaviors because extreme versions of discipline are often seen as the status quo, traditional practices passed down OPINION OF THE EL ESTOQUE through generations and something to be taken EDITORIAL BOARD with a grain of salt because “my parents only hit me because they love me.” Growing up experiencing household parents grew up in abusive households, violence can lead children to believe that thus these violent methods perpetuate a abuse is just a part of the learning process neverending cycle of abuse and trauma.

In contrast to traditional Asian paror another branch of regular discipline. It enting, Western and American parenting isn’t. Abuse doesn’t teach a child positive stresses that the individual is of highest behavior; it scars a child emotionally and importance.

Children born in America physically, straining relationships in the are often raised with the belief that they process. Childhood abuse is often a factor

STAFF EDITORIAL

SWEDEN UNTOLERATED

Less than 10% of youth are spanked.

Any form of physical punishment is illegal and can result in jail time for the parent.

INDIA HITTING

80% of parents admitted to slapping their child on the face or head in Delhi — American Journal of Pediatrics

DISCIPLINARY ACTIONS ABROAD 12

EL ESTOQUE

can be whoever they want to be. When children are born in America but with traditional Asian heritage, American values conflict with the traditional views of their parents, which can breed hostility. At a school in which 79.8 percent of the students are Asian, the cultural differences are strikingly prevalent. Students may be told in school that they should study what they are passionate about, yet at home their parents may speak to the contrary.

No matter the justification, a parent who beats his or her child is abusing him or her. A parent who refuses to feed his or her child is abusing him or her. A parent who leaves his child alone and isolated in Cupertino is abusing him or her. The legal line between what is discipline and what is abuse must be respected. When discipline goes beyond what is accepted by the law and ends up harming a child psychologically, it must cease, lest the bond between parent and child be irrevocably damaged. The fundamental problem is that a person’s cultural background cannot be changed. We can’t change the traditional values of our parents, and we can’t reshape their ideals. What we can do, however, is be sensitive to their cultural upbringing, while actively educating them on why extreme forms of physical and psychological discipline does more harm than it does help. Often the best method educating them is through family counseling.

And to victims of abuse, realize that if your parents physically or emotionally harass, especially if this kind of treatment is ongoing, you are in an abusive household. Although it may seem like just one strike or blow, any form of abuse should

not be tolerated. While your parents may have your best interest in mind, the bottom line is they are harming you.

We know that there is no easy fix.

The resolution is not as black and white as either calling the CPA or moving into a friend’s house. But these are steps

you can take. Furthermore, the CPA will only consider separation as a worst case scenario and will try to work with you and your family to readjust the family dynamics. Change can only begin with self-awareness and re-instruction.

IS IT ABUSE?

100 MVHS students’ responses to hypothetical situations

YOUR PARENT LASHES YOU WITH A BELT

YOUR PARENT SLAPS YOU ON THE WRIST OR HAND

89 11 YES

NO

53 47 YES

NO

YOUR PARENT TELLS YOU YOU ARE WORTHLESS

84 16

YOUR PARENT REFUSES YOU A MEAL

68 22

CHINA

TOUGH LOVE

YES

YES

NO

NO

KOREA SPANKING

with a “switch,” a small, yet pliable tree branch or twig.

Beatings involve broomsticks or hard objects that can leave bruises or welts on the child’s skin.

—Chinese-American Planning Council

NOVEMBER 19, 2014

13

GIVE HELP

OPINION

MY LAW

THE LAW

BY GABRIELLA MONICO AND PRANAV PARTHASARATHY

IS IT ABUSE? your parents refuse to feed you

v

abuse discipline

Under California Penal Code, “The failure to provide adequate food, clothing and shelter or parental care may lead to criminal prosecution for neglect.”

your parents lock you up in a room abuse discipline If this punishment lasts for a few hours or less it is within the provisions of legal discipline.

your parents shake or slap you abuse discipline California Penal Code Section 240 defines assault as an intentional attempt to “violently injure” a person and will lead to legal action being taken against the abuser.

14

Despite cultural practices in the way parents discipline their children, there are certain practices that the California Penal Code deem illegal and constitute abuse

T

ake a look at one senior whose mother hit her and her brother when they were in elementary school, often for things as trivial as not adhering to a bedtime or refusing to clean up their rooms. Take a look at two sophomore girls mentioned in this issue’s Special Report, one whose father threw a television remote at her and another who was spanked with a wooden spoon — at times simply because of a bad grade. The parents claim this was discipline.

Her parents and the law, however, are in conflict.

According to the United States Department of Justice, domestic violence is defined as “a pattern of abusive behavior in any relationship that is used by one partner to gain or maintain power and control over [another].”

Behavior that intimidates, manipulates, humiliates, injures, or isolates another person is considered domestic violence and when targeted at youth, child abuse. All incidents of domestic violence are considered felonies. A violation of domestic violence

1

laws can merit up to five years in prison.

And there are several actions which fall under that definition according to the law. California Penal Section 11165.3 clearly states that if a parent creates any situation that leads to “prolonged mental suffering” he or she has endangered the health of the child and may be charged with domestic violence. Corporal punishment, often employed in other countries as a disciplinary measure, is also expressly banned by California statute, which warns against situations, “where any person willfully inflicts upon any child any cruel or inhuman corporal punishment or injury resulting in a traumatic condition.”

The California Code barrs verbal abuse and forms of neglect which many cultures view traditionally as innocuous and even inevitable. General neglect explicitly bans resisting to provide a child with “adequate food, shelter, medical care, or supervision,” punishing parents even when no physical in-

jury to the child has occured.

The Child Abuse and Neglect Reporting Act expands child protections to verbal abuse, guarding minors from physical, emotional, sexual and psychological harm as well.

This means that not only is physical assault legally reprimandable, but verbal harassment that constitutes “prolonged mental suffering” can have similar repercussions.

While Santa Clara county has the third-lowest amount of county-wide domestic violence in the state, the phenomenon is far from absent.

In order to address these problems within our community we should be prepared to adopt and respect the legal definitions of abuse and understand that despite what is considered the “norm,” the definition of abuse is not as hazy as it can initially appear. g.monico@elestoque.org | p.parthasarathy@elestoque.org

BREAK the cycle Recognize that you are in an abusive home

2

Stop making excuses for the abuser

3

Take action to escape the dangerous situation EL ESTOQUE

What to do if you live in an abusive household

BY ANJANA MELVIN IDENTIFYING ABUSE

The effects of child abuse can vary dramatically. In a survey of 6,000 American families conducted by UNICEF in 2006, 50 percent of men who assault their wives also abuse their children. According to an online survey of 234 MVHS students, 49 percent have been slapped, hit or scratched by their parents. Fifty-five percent of students know someone at school who has been physically, verbally or emotionally abused. In a community like MVHS, where the pressure to succeed is at the forefront of everyone’s mind, parents can make their child feel worthless by constantly criticizing them over their grades or extracurriculars. On average, an MVHS student takes three AP tests a year. The average SAT score for the class of 2015 was 2,000, while the average SAT score for students in Calif. in the same year was 1,500. Despite these accomplishments, many students feel like they can never meet their parents’ expectations because the demands are so exorbitant and often neverending. This type of emotional abuse is often times overlooked, even accepted. We must recognize this as abuse so we can take a step toward fixing it.

1.

Take Action

Make an escape plan from your home.

2.

Have somewhere to go once you’re out.

3. Once you are in a safe

place, call 9-1-1.

Seeking Help

By law, all school personnel are required to verbally report suspicions of abuse within 24 hours and turn in a written report within three days, even with just reasonable suspicion. Alongside murder and suicide, abuse is not part of the confidentiality agreement between a student and his or her counselor, and thus, counselors must report the abuse of a student even without the student’s consent.

Talking to a trusted teacher or close friend is the safest way to report a problem. However, if there is a life threatening situation happening at the moment, call 9-1-1. According to Student Advocate Richard Prinz, it’s best to have a 3-step plan.

Signs of an Abusive Relationship

Marks on the body New, risky behavior, like using drugs or alcohol

SHIFTING FAMILY DYNAMICS According to Dr. Thomas Tarshis, medical director of the Bay Area Children’s Association, the child would first be placed somewhere where there is no threat of abuse, such as in the house of a close relative or friend. Then, he or she will usually be connected with a trauma counselor and put through a scientific treatment called Trauma Focused Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Depending on the severity of the abuse, the court may mandate different degrees of punishment against the abusive parent. Often, children are afraid that by reporting their parents, they would lose their family and destroy any chance they have at closure and a happy future. Both Tarshis and Prinz agree that this is not the case. The goal of social services, except in the most severe cases, is to work toward family reconciliation.

“Taking you out of the home is not a good thing. Living in a foster home isn’t healthy,” Prinz said. “Keeping the family together, educating the parents, getting things to change in the family is the most productive thing.”

People who talk about constantly getting nightmares or not getting enough sleep

Someone who was once very social and suddenly no longer seems interested in going out and hanging out with friends

F Someone who was doing well academically and is now all of a sudden getting bad grades and missing a lot of classes

Sudden switch to wearing more conservative clothing, especially during seasons when warm clothes are unreasonable

* according to Dr. Thomas Tarshis, MD, Bay Area Children’s Association, specialist in child and adolescent psychiatry

a.melvin@elestoque.org

NOVMEBER 19, 2014

15

Opinion

Please, just leave.

If Congress and Christie don’t get their act together, at least we can

I

16

ing one David Wildstein, a former classmate and Port Authority official. When asked about Wildstein, Christie, with his characteristic egotism said that he was the class president and star athlete in high school, and had no idea what the Port Authority official was up to during that span of time. I guess ambition starts young.

And now our favorite governor has a new problem beating at the gate of his lovely Garden State: Ebola. In conjunction with Governor of New York Andrew Cuomo, he announced a mandatory 21day quarantine for those coming from West Africa who have Ebola-like symptoms. Cuomo has recognized that this may seem a little bit harsh, so he has allowed patients to serve the quarantine at their homes. Christie? In his own words, “We’re not moving an inch.”

He definitely didn’t in the case of Kaci Hickox, whom he placed in a tent with no shower, climate control or modern toilet, instead providing her with a box with a hole in it. She wasn’t even sick her temperature was misread at the airport - yet her release was accompanied by Christie’s obstinate condescension. In his own words, his “extreme caution” was justified by his care for the health of the people of New Jersey.

And he also made it clear that he does not represent Hickox, only the people of New Jersey.

I could keep going on and on about our lovely protector of the Garden State, but I, unlike him and several of his Washington comrades, actually want to do a good job.

Unlike him and his Washington comrades, I recognize that being honest isn’t just a suggestion, it’s a mandate. And, unlike him and several of his Washington comrades, as I write the final sentence of this column, I am doing my work on time.

Mingjie Zhong | El Estoque

am writing this column on Oct. 28, 2014. A lot of interesting events are coming up: Halloween is obviously in three days, but, more importantly, the 2014 midterm elections are next Tuesday. And the rest of the staff and I are leaving for D.C. two days after that.

You might be wondering why I don’t wait a week to write this column. After all, tons of interesting stuff could happen in that week alone.

Surely there will be some earth-shattering scandal that will break on election day. Surely I can pull a Snowden while I’m in the capital and leak that information through this column (which millions of people obviously read). Surely I could draw comedic inspiration from Halloween costumes and give myself an excuse to buy pumpkin spice lattes, which would obviously help me write this column. So really, why am I writing this right now?

Well, I’m writing this right now because it’s part of my job. Though I have so much fun writing this I could hardly call it work. Nevertheless, I cannot shun responsibility. Part of my job is publishing the best content possible, but part of it is also making sure that I do it in a timely and responsible manner, always maintaining transparency along the way.

That’s funny, because that’s the antithesis of how our government functions. Congress shut our government down for 16 days because it couldn’t agree on a new budget after nearly an entire year of deliberation.

Our current Congress, the 113th, is the least productive in over 40 years. In order to find a less productive Congress we would have to go back to the times of race riots, of recordhigh crime, of a president who deserved to be behind bars, but managed to weasel his way out of a sentence.

And sadly, this dysfunction is not limited to our capital. Right now we may see it blooming in Trenton, the playground of

PRANAV PARTHASARATHY ON HIGHER GROUND Governor Chris Christie of the garden state of New Jersey.

Ah, this guy again. He actually reminds me of Rob Ford. While far smarter and without a drug problem, he is still undeniably hilarious, and like Ford, he has a particular dislike for reporters such as myself.

“When reporters act like jerks, you need to treat them that way back,” Christie said at one interview. When interrupted by protesters chanting “Christie kills jobs,” do you know what he said? “You know, something may go down tonight, but it ain’t gonna be jobs, sweetheart.”

That combative nature typified his response to the Bridgegate scandal, wherein the busiest bridge in the country had several of its lanes closed, causing a traffic jam that lasted for days. He viciously fired nearly his entire cabinet, all the while insisting that he had no contact with the perpetrators, includ-

p.parthasarathy@elestoque.org

EL ESTOQUE

A&E

DECODED The dress code is widely viewed as subjective

BY SARAH RAMOS AND EMILY ZHAO

E

47% of students think certain “innapropriate” clothing items may disrupt the learning environment

80% of students

think that the dress code is appropriate/ fitting for students

78% of students don’t think that the dress code should be more strictly enforced

stratio

n

very day, everyone is socially obligated be detrimental to the to get dressed, but where is the limit learning comas to what people can appropriately munity.” wear? All FUHSD schools have the same Senior Canrudimentary guidelines, but each school still dice Macaburetains its own unique and additional rules.

Across the nation, different levels of extremity of punishments are enforced to discipline students. As for Monta Vista, Diana Goularte, Executive Assistant to Principal, represents the view of the school district that advocates and enforces the dress code.

District policy reflects the idea that there is one main reason for a dress code: to prevent clothing-related disruptions to the learning environment.

Senior Abby Feather was disciplined for violating the dress code when she wore a tank-top with an exposed back, a cardigan and short-shorts. Feather essentially opposes a dress code in school.

“I think that [the dress code is] about con- hay believes trolling boys,” Feather said. “The way you that the purdress [should be] for yourself.” pose of a dress code Karen Mangiacotti, a writer on Huff- is prejudiced and ington Post, in her article “Back Off, Dress more strict toward Codes. This is Not Your Call,” suggests that girls than toward dress codes are inherently biased. males. “...Ripping dress-code-violating girls out “[I heard] Homeof class and sending them home prioritizes stead banned yoga pants the rights of the boys (to learn without dis- because they were too form-fitting traction) over the rights of girls (to simply at- for girls,” Macabuhay said. Macabutend school),” Mangiacotti said. hay believes that if a male were to wear Additionally, the article argues that dress form-fitting clothes on the other codes imply that men are weak and women, hand, the response of the communot men, are therefore held accountable for nity would not be as large or strict. mens’ inappropriate actions.

The Homestead High School “[Dress codes are] indoctrinating our dress code directly states, “Yoga young men and women into a mindset that pants, leggings, jeggings, stockis remarkably harmonious with rape culture,” said Mangiacotti.

GIRLS SHOULD BE ABLE TO History teacher HilWEAR WHATEVER THEY WANT ary Barron believes that dress codes are imporBECAUSE BOYS SHOULD LEARN tant to creating an environment in which stuTO CONTROL THEMSELVES. dents and teachers feel junior Jamie Tsai comfortable to interact.

“I don’t feel like it’s a huge issue at Monta Vista, but if students were to dress in a cer- ings, tights, or any clothing made of thin, tain way it could be distracting,” Barron tight material such as spandex or lysaid. “but I do think it has the potential to cra may not be worn unless covered by 18

are somewhat familiar with the dress code

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68% of students

EL ESTOQUE

shorts, skirts, sweaters, etc. that are beyond fingertip length without adjusting at all times.” MVHS students wear yoga pants, leggings and jeggings on a regular basis, so these students would not pass Homestead’s written rules.

A case in September had eleven girls at Utah’s Birmingham High School’s Homecoming dance turned away due to their “immodest dresses,” and the girls were asked to sit against the wall in embarrassment. One of the girls was asked

to manage behavior of males.

“Girls should be able to wear whatever they want because boys should learn to control themselves,” Tsai said.

In an article on Huffington Post Teen, Marion Mayer argues that girls should not be responsible for covering up to avoid excessive attention from males, because it’s up to the males to change their behavior.

Dress code violation outfit:

Retail report card Forever 21, H&M and Brandy Melville are popular vendors that market their clothes to high school students. These are three “best selling” items from their respective websites, and our grades for these items based on specific guidelines from the MVHS planner.

Forever 21 longline slit tank top product from forever21.com Grade: CViolates rule restricting low cut shirts, wide sleeves reveal side of chest.

“

Senior Abby Feather

“

I think that [dress codes] are about controlling boys.

The way you dress is for yourself.

to twirl around so administrators could check whether her dress was too short.

As part of the Faculty Advisory Committee, Barron acknowledges concerns regarding the dress code and its effects. Barron accredits that at MVHS, it’s not the administration’s priority in terms of issues, but the administration is very willing to implement changes and recognize possible contention. The dress code is written in the planner and students’ parents sign forms to agree to it, but the guidelines are vague in her opinion.

The dress code in the MVHS planner clearly states, “students should avoid exposure of extensive areas of midriff, backless, strapless or low cut tops, muscle shirts, extremely short skirts or shorts.” These guidelines are inherently vague, as “extensive areas” and “extremely short” are subjective, making it difficult for students to determine what constitutes these rules.

Junior Jamie Tsai is against the dress code because she believes girls should have freedom of expression through clothing, and that dress codes attempt NOVEMBER 19, 2014

Brandy Melville Vodi shorts “When the people who sexually harass other people happen to be male and you use the excuse ‘boys will be boys,’ you are not only excusing their behavior, you are condoning it,” Mayer said.

Ultimately, she feels that the “boys will be boys” statement is an insult to males because it assumes that they are incapable of suppressing any attraction they feel toward girls.

This argument that girls are blamed and are responsible to prevent unnecessary disturbances is prevalent among these sources.

Seemingly, the dress code is widely believed to hold an inherent prejudice toward girls, and the vague guidelines may just impose that upon school life. s.ramos@elestoque.org | e.zhao@elestoque.org

product from brandymelvilleusa.com Grade: BViolates length of shorts. Loose fabric and low waist are potential reasons for violation, but risk is low.

H&M flared camisole top product from hm.com/us Grade: D Violates rules banning low cut and backless shirts.

19

A&E

POPPIN’ TAGS

Two students discuss pros and cons of Black Friday

I

BY LYDIA SEO

t’s Thursday night in 2013, but Black Friday has officially begun. More than 5,000 people lie in wait, The Sun reports. Before the clock strikes 8 p.m., Walmart’s doors swing open, and the people outside are pitted against each other in the mad scramble for the entrance. Once inside, two fights erupt over merchandise.

Another breaks out in front of the store and injures a police officer. The brawlers are all taken into custody.

Black Friday is the manic day after Thanksgiving during which many retail stores open in the early morning and hold large sales. Last year, about 141 million people took advantage of the Black Friday sales, spending more than $55 billion.

Despite the many sales held on Black Friday, shoppers must face large, violent crowds. Is it worth it?

The renouncer “Black Friday is evil,” senior Eileen Tsai said.

Tsai refrains from Black Friday shopping due to the safety hazards of the night-time rush. Due to the large sales and early opening times, the risk of being trampled or having a traffic accident is higher than usual.

According to BlackFridayDeathCount.com, a website that collects

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Black Friday c a sua lt y-relat e d news, there have been seven recorded deaths and 90 injuries since 2006.

“It’s really dangerous,” Tsai said.

“There a r e people who have mace and they’ll spray it in your face… There are riots and [shoppers] 20

just trample one another trying to get to “To be honest, the sales are kind of the what they want.” same, and they have [fewer] products,” Park To Tsai, the costs of Black Friday greatly said. “It’s just the experience of a lot of peooutweigh the benefits. She acknowledges ple and … being with your friends and being that the shoppers contribute to the econo- up really early.” my, but is averse to joining the ranks.

With regards to the dangers of the “While [Black crowds, Park doesn’t Friday shopping] is THERE ARE TWO KINDS OF mind taking the risks. helpful economi“There are two cally, it’s not some- PEOPLE ... PEOPLE WHO kinds of people ... thing I would do TRAMPLE AND PEOPLE people who trample personally,” Tsai and people who said. “My impact on WHO GET TRAMPLED. get trampled,” Park freshman Christine Park said. “I guess I’m [the economy] is so little, I choose not to the type of person go for my own safety.” who tramples.”

Although stores hold sales throughout For those who wish to avoid the frenthe year, most people decide to take ad- zy, an increasingly popular alternative is vantage of Black Friday sales in particular. Cyber Monday, the day after the ThanksThe day is considered the start of the winter giving weekend when shoppers can holiday season, which is why many retailers find sales online. advertise holiday-related products in order Despite the option of remaining in the to attract consumers shopping for Christ- peace and quiet of home, Park recommends mas gifts. that people venture into the world of Black Economics teacher Pete Pelkey advo- Friday shopping for the experience itself. cates the mass spending. Pelkey views the “Go for it if it’s your first time,” Park day as beneficial to the nation’s economy. said. “But if you’re really bad with crowds “It is the biggest single spending day of and you don’t like crowds, I would just say the year. It determines a great deal of our stay away from it and go GDP because we start the Christmas sea- in the morning.” l.seo@elestoque.org

son,” Pelkey said. “Almost a third of our GDP is in one month... That’s how much of a spending excess occurs during the month of December.”

The shopper Freshman Christine Park has consistently participated in the annual Black Friday rush.

With her friends, she shops as early as 1 a.m.

Though Park wishes to take part in the hectic shopping at Walmart someday, she tends to frequent clothing outlets such as Forever 21 or H&M and malls such as Westfield Valley Fair.

Park believes that the experience rather than the actual sales attracts her to Black Friday shopping.

Faceoff Senior Eileen Tsai (left) berates freshman Christine Park (right). While Park shops on Black Friday, Tsai refuses to.

EL ESTOQUE

Justin Kim | El Estoque

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s she steps out onto the stage on opening night, her mind returns to the moment when she first stepped out of the plane. She is separated from her homeland by 5,500 miles. A time difference of nine hours prevents her from communicating with her family back home. When she takes her first few steps on land, she finally realizes how far she is from home. All around her, strangers speak in a familiar, yet foreign tongue. Though she understands the words, she cannot keep up with the torrent of English. Home is so far away. She worries that she might miss it someday. And yet she is excited for this new experience, to dance and act on stage, to live the American dream she has heard so much about. There are butterflies in her stomach, fluttering everywhere in anticipation of the future.

Now she is speaking and performing in English in front of an audience, laughing and working with friends who, three months ago, she never would have imagined meeting. Any fears of her new, unfamiliar environment, any desire to prematurely return to familiar faces, never surface. In fact, she revels on stage, excited for what is coming next.

This, for now, is her home.

In the span of three months, junior Leonie Vullgraf, a German exchange student, went from being a foreigner, fresh off the plane from Germany, to the actress playing Mrs. Lucille McKee in MV Drama’s rendition of The Great Gatsby.

This isn’t the first time Vullgraf has acted on stage. Back in her hometown of Eckernförde, she actively participated in drama in her elementary school, where her mother was a drama teacher. Surprisingly, Vullgraf never enrolled in a formal drama class; she didn’t even think about it before this school year. Fortunately for Vullgraf, a friend, junior Eva Ruiz, took her for a visit to the Drama Black Box. “On the first day, Eva said to me, ‘Yeah, NOVEMBER 19, 2014

(Above) Junior Leonie Vullgraf rehearses her scene with junior Hari Ganesh and sophomore Nelson Niu on Nov. 4. She found her character Ms. McKee shallow, nosy and yet likeable. (Left) Vullgraf dances on stage with sophomore Nelson Niu. Justin Kim | El Estoque

you can come with me to the- getting along amicably. Hardee was espeatre, we have some friends and we are hang- cially eager to befriend her new housemate.

“Both of my siblings were off in college,” ing out there and it’s a lesson, but we can be in there. I went with her to theatre and it Hardee said. “The house was too quiet, so it was so cool that I asked the teacher if there was great to have some company.’”

Hardee’s family was introduced to the was a free spot,” Vullgraf said. “She said, ‘Okay, you can ask Mr. [assistant principal exchange program through the Wilson famMike] White if you can change your sched- ily, close friends who had housed Vullgraf’s brother Niklas when he was an exchange stuule.’ And three days later, I was in drama.”

On the fourth day of the school year, dent back in 2008.

Thanks to her new friends and old hobVullgraf joined MV Drama. Since then, she has performed in both MVSNL 2014 and bies, Vullgraf has found a new home in the MV Drama’s “The Great Gatsby”. Despite U.S. And those fears of missing home? She her unfamiliarity with the school and Eng- hasn’t bothered herself with those since she lish language, Vullgraf wants to continue to stepped out of the plane.

“I was a bit scared that I would be homeparticipate in MV Drama performances besick … I think I won’t be homesick because cause of the joy she feels while acting.

“To jump into character and to be on it’s so nice here; I don’t have a reason to be homesick,” Vullgraf said. “I really look forstage to get ward to this rest of this, I love this feeling after I WAS A BIT SCARED THAT my exchange year.

It only can keep the show when I WOULD BE HOMESICK ... I getting better, I you go on stage and get the apTHINK I WON’T BE HOMESICK think.”

Vullgraf will replause, and BECAUSE IT’S SO NICE HERE. turn to Germany you’re so happy junior Leonie Vullgraf after the end of her and full of emojunior year, near tion and adrenaline,” Vullgraf said. “And I love to wear cos- the beginning of July. After that, she can go tumes. And, well, it’s this mix of you jump back to her old school with her stories about into it and on the next day you are the next her experience in America. And perhaps she person. You can be whatever person you will miss MVHS as a second home. But until then, she plans to enjoy every second of her want to be.”

Vullgraf has been staying with fellow ju- time here. j.kim@elestoque.org | a.pimplaskar@elestoque.org nior Bronwen Hardee and her family since the middle of August. Since their first meeting in mid-April, the two girls have been 21

A&E

Walk a mile in my shoes Shoes defined by the memories of the wearer

BY BRANDON CHIN

T

his object is bound in leather or fabric and tells a story. It waits patiently, collecting dust and age, until the moment it is read and the knowledge is perceived. It comes in a myriad of lengths, sizes and volumes but it only ever serves one purpose — for you to step on.

A shoe rack is like a library and the shoe itself is a story for at the very bottom of every single one, underneath all the debris and worn fabric, is a sole. Each student wears a different type of shoe and each tells a unique story. From sneakers that have been worn from middle school to high school or stilettos worn for special occasions, shoes are not something to walk on but something to walk with. Shoes show the path that the wearer treads on. By tradition, creativity or emotional relief—a pair of shoes is tied to the character and the choice of the individual. b.chin@elestoque.org

SENIOR JONATHAN LIN

A

s a result of habit and familiar comfort, Lin has worn the same type of shoes for almost six years.

Changing the shoe itself but not the style, this model has been with him from middle to high school.

“A lot of people ask why my style never changes, especially my shoes,” Lin said.

“It’s kind of funny how many people mention it. All I have to say, really, to that is, ‘Does it need to change?’”

21

JUNIOR LAWRENCE HAN

H

an once bought a pair of $50 Vans and painted them stark white. The original black color was bleached out in swaths of white spray paint with the goal to make the shoes model the famous Margiela style. The result was that he turned his shoe into a makeshift canvas.

“I keep them because I think they’re pretty cool,” said Han. “But I honestly end up wearing them only when I’m too lazy to throw together an outfit.”

SENIOR ANOOSHA BAXI

B

axi celebrates both rain and sunshine by donning yellow rubber rain boots and tromping around campus. First received as a present three years ago, these 100 percent rubber boots have quickly become Baxi’s favorite not only to thwart puddles but to make herself feel bold and unshakeable.

“It keeps me warm when the weather doesn’t. Some people treat it like it’s disposable, but I still have clothing that I wear and still fits me from back in sixth grade!”

EL ESTOQUE

NO, SHAVE THIS NOVEMBER A

Swearing off razors does not raise awarness, just hairs

s the last few days of October come to a close, many of the “furrier” MVHS students purge their faces of their scruffy stubble. This yearly occurrence signifies the beginning of “No Shave N o v e m b e r. ” By the time T ha nk sg iv ing comes around, this men’s health awareness campaign has polarized guys and girls in a dispute summarized simply as, “To shave, or not to shave?”

I’ve personally never understood the appeal of keeping cactus pricks on your face for an entire month, especially if you don’t know that the original goal of No Shave November was to raise awareness for men’s health.

The real question is: does keeping an unkempt beard for the month of November really raise awareness for men’s health? Or has it simply become a ploy for some to claim that it is okay because it’s “manly?” The cause, like most awareness campaigns, is of course noble. However, I can’t help but feel that No Shave November has become an excuse to exempt participatory males from basic personal hygiene.

The other “mainstream” awareness projects seem much less offensive and controversial than scratchy faces and neckbeards.

Breast cancer awareness, for example, asks only that you show support by wearing pink. And while there was heavy controversy over the ALS Association’s ice bucket challenge this past summer, it does require guts to dump that much ice-cold water on your head. Abstaining from shaving only requires laziness. And, at the end of the day, ice melts and water dries up. Hair does not.

The facial hair becomes wild and unweilding, and downright gross. I remember one year, someone I knew joked that his No Shave November participation was really his transition from human into grizzly bear. While that joke was amusing during Halloween, by Black Friday, he basically was a walking, talking bear. And I can say that this beast strolling around campus certainly turned heads, but I can’t say that people knew why this student decided to become more in-touch with the animal kingdom.

NOVEMBER 19, 2014

According to The Movember Foundation’s website, “No Shave November celebrates the hair that many cancer patients lose,” but since its creation, it seems that many people don’t make the connection

SARAH RAMOS SHE’S THE MAN

between over-grown facial hair and chemotherapy patients. While this may have been the intention, No Shave November has been more about accepting the challenge to prove manliness (or to just gross everyone out) and not about men’s health.

Most people don’t know what the foundation is all about, which is why there isn’t a strongly established bridge between beard and awareness. I’ve had my fair share of neckbeards, five-o’clock shadows, and nasty mustaches shoved in my faced and for what purpose?

The point of an awareness campaign or “challenge” is to spread awareness, and if people know about the challenge, but not the cause, then No Shave November might as well not exist. For many MVHS students, November is an incredibly stressful and demanding time of the year, and a long, out of control beard says less “I’m raising awareness for testicular cancer,” and more, “I’ve lost control of my life and my college apps.”

Because No Shave November lasts the entire month, it seems to get lost as participants give in to the itchy, scratchy, annoying hairs populating their face. The point of a challenge campaign is to complete the challenge, so why is it designed to be so difficult? For those of you who do

grow thick facial hair, think about the last time you let it grow uncontrollably for thirty days. Chances are, you don’t usually let it.

And even if you do make it through all of November, when someone sees you with that full beard, the first thing that they think of probably won’t be “prostate cancer.”

Nevertheless, there are still positives to No Shave November. Shaving is time consuming, causes irritation, bumps and redness. Plus, an extra coating of hair can keep your mandible insulated from this deceitful Californian “winter” weather.

And if all of these things are positive enough for you, by all means, keep that itchy, sweat-catching, repulsive shrubbery on your face for thirty long days.

But if you’re still on the fence about No Shave November, please, for the sake of your neck, your girlfriend, your dignity and yourself, choose to shave your beard this November before you get attached to it. s.ramos@elestoque.org

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BEHIND CLOSED DOORS

BY KRISTIN CHANG

Domestic abuse is a hard thing to discuss. It's even harder to live through. But for some, being hit, slapped or insulted for little reason has become an unremarkable part of each day. In this issue, we explore how domestic abuse desecrates self-confidence and respect, leaving behind vestiges of insecurities and false hopes.

And yet, we can't see the worst of it.

SPECIAL

H

grade, he recites to himself almost every night: It was just an accident. Or sometimes: It was so stupid. Or more often: It’s nothing.

There will be one girl who notices that his left eye seems slightly lopsided, but she won’t do anything but stare.

“As cheesy as it sounds, I would’ve said I walked into a pole or something,” he said. “Like something out of a movie. I would have said anything.”

In none of these scenarios does he say the truth, which is that he had been slapped almost to the brink of unconsciousness by his mother, who had stood over him as he curled against the living room sofa.

As usual, he forgets how the argument started, only that it ended the same way: with his body seeming foreign to him.

“Whenever I saw her transform, I would feel myself mimic her,” he said. “Which is why I’m afraid that when I grow up, I will inherit the [violence] somehow.”

The cycle always begins with something about his grades. Or his friends. Or the way he speaks — flippant, maybe. Sometimes it’s as arbitrary as spilling his water onto his textbook. And then she notices. And then he talks back.

“And that’s when it becomes kind of surreal,” he said. “[I start] to hear these sounds in my ear, kind of like white noise. That’s how afraid I get.”

It starts in his forehead: first an ache or a flash and then the vague static, the buzzing echoes in his ears that indicate a panic attack. And then the slightest trembling, but by then, he isn’t even looking at her anymore. His hands cover his face, his eyes squeeze shut. He’s on the floor, feeling cold. He’s waiting.

“At home, I was always

e watches the smoke curl away from his face.

26

18%

EL ESTOQUE

Manners or behavior

According to 138 students who have been either physically or emotionally abused by their parents

34%

Academics

Why They were ABUSED

30%

Honesty or integrity

Out the window, down the street, the white tendrils swimming away into the dying 5 p.m. light. The patterns of smoke remind him of these fish he had as a kid.

At this point, he doesn’t really care if he gets caught smoking with his head halfway out the window, his chin at rest on the sill with all of his piano-shaped trophies, the ones he owes to his mother.

For a brief moment of panic, as a cop on a motorcycle streaks along the street below, he thinks that he’ll get caught. But then he remembers: So what. Let them come.

Sure, he’s underage. But the smoke would help obscure his left eye. Which happens to be bleeding onto his arm, leaving little crimson stains. Kind of like freckles, he recalls.

He knows what he’ll say to his dad tomorrow after he’s woken up and ready to leave for school — if he manages to sleep at all.

He knows what he’ll say to his best friend, who will probably be the only one to ask, because his eye actually isn’t really noticeable, barely bruised, not even purple, probably a little puffy, but it’ll go down, maybe, probably, especially if he plunges his face into a sink full of ice, though the fridge is always running out of things like ice.

“I had it all planned out,” he said, remembering that day in 2012. “I always knew what to say, even if I didn’t even have to say it because no one asked. It felt so dumb to keep making things up.”

But it didn’t feel dumb then. In ninth

1

12%

5% Other

Extracurriculars

%

in a state of waiting,” he said. “I’m as unpredictable as my parents. I feel weak ... all at once.”

On one Wednesday, he tries telling a teacher about this one time. “This one time, one time” becomes his internal mantra. But when he opens his mouth, tries to speak, his voice never really comes out as anything more than a stutter.

The story he tries to tell is one of his earliest memories: a day in sixth grade, when his mom finds out that he has ripped his middle school geometry test into perfect 3-inch by 3-inch squares and then proceeded to deposit it in the compost bin. She begins to scream, that familiar pitch that reminds him of radio static.

He wants to explain, wants to finish the round of MarioKart he’s playing on his DS, but even without realizing, he starts to cry.

She throws his DS over the neighbor’s fence and pushes him down in his chair. His hands grasp the edge of the glass table so hard that the white coating is peeled.

When he’s ordered to stand up against the plaster dining-room wall until dinnertime, he can see his own eyes in the reflection of the microwave.

He’s distorted.

A few hours pass. His mom eats in front of him and continues to yell. He tries to cover his ears, but her voice is louder now, and rising. The entire round glass table seems to vibrate. Later, when he’s in bed, he hears her come up the stairs, that slap of slippers on carpet. He can feel the familiar tension reverberate up his spine and across his back.

When she raises her hand, poised to strike, he’s already in a fetal position. She punches his thighs, throws his textbooks at his exposed arms, slaps his chest and sides.

After a few moments he stops crying.

“It was always better when she just got to the physical part,” he said. “Because then she ran out of breath and couldn’t yell.”

What he hears is mostly unintelligible.

There are the familiar Chinese insults, the kind he sometimes hears in the student parking lot or the cafeteria: dumbass, idiot, useless. But somehow, when she says them, it feels worse than the time she made him sit on a backless stool for 14 hours with his

NOVEMBER 19, 2014

The Story behind the story How I spent a month behind the door

BY KRISTIN CHANG

M

y source and I treated our interviews like memoir-planning sessions: we laid out post-its with snippets from his dozens of journal and private blog entries, which he has written since grade school. They contain his own reflections and various pamphlets his therapist had told him to read and write about. Part of his therapy was to “excavate” — to unearth his memories and confront them.

For the first week we met half a dozen times, anywhere we could pretend that everything was between only the two of us. After the first week, I was still afraid to contact anybody to verify his story. I didn’t want to scare him into thinking I distrusted him, that I was doubting his experiences. I was terrified the whole time. I wasn’t being a very good reporter.

Finally, over the weekend, he asked me: “So, do you want to talk to my parents or what?” I immediately agreed and realized that he was trying to help me: that he had seen my fear and that he wanted the story to happen as much as I did. I met his parents at his house on three afternoons, where I sat at the kitchen table and asked them for their perspective of the story. By that time, I had shown their son every part of the story I’d written so far, but when I printed out my draft to give to them, their reading appeared cursory.

They told me that they didn’t want to be involved. They were exhausted from trying to communicate to Child Protective Service workers and therapists and other parents about their reasons, and they would rather I publish without their opinions. I asked again and this time, they read more carefully.

After a few hours of negotiation, they permitted me to include one quote in the story. Though they admitted to verbally and physically abusing their son, even conceding to me that it was not always deserved, they were apprehensive — not about their son’s account, but about how they would be perceived when their own voices were included along with their son’s story.

A few days later, I called the CPS

service line to contact the social worker who first arrived at my source’s house after his call; CPS would not identify the woman, but they did advise me to talk to someone who had performed a more recent follow-up.

My source offered to contact the CPS worker who had most recently inspected his home and who was in possession of all his records and examination results. I Skype-called his social worker John Evitt, who has since moved to an office in Los Angeles County.

Evitt, after permission from both the source and his parents, agreed to discuss confidential information. He stated that the first inspection revealed that though the conditions of the house were deemed “low risk,” the child appeared to be physically and emotionally traumatized. He was scratched and bruised and suffering from potential stress and panic disorders, and there was evidence of previous trauma as well.

I then prepared a list of broader questions for my source’s therapist, who commented on the normalization of abuse and the importance of reconciling the family. I shared excerpts of the story and his only comment was that he thought I was accurately portraying a type of domestic violence common in the Asian-American community.

When I went home and arranged all my materials, all 30-plus hours of audio and my notes and the documents and the diary entries, I couldn’t help but wonder if I’d fulfilled my promise: that I would tell his story, tell it well and somehow help him “excavate” in the process.

I called him one last time 15 minutes ago, just to tell him I’m writing this column because this story — his story — has somehow become both of our lives. I warned him one last time that this story could change so much for him.

He told me he was beyond telling his story as a method of coping. He thought it might mean something now, that this story was the next “stage” in a long series of deciding to remember. He told me that he wouldn’t regret it.

And I don’t either.

27

SPECIAL

WHEN SHOULD CPS RESPOND IMMEDIATELY?*

if child . . . is unsupervised or alone is fearful of home situation

if caregiver . . .

needs immediate medical care has multiple injuries has injuries to the face or head has experienced severe maltreatment experienced premeditated maltreatment is in life-threatening living arrangements has experienced cruelty

is unable to provide basic care exhibits bizarre behavior is described as dangerous is out of control is under influence of substance cannot meet child’s needs is at unknown location cannot explain child’s injuries

if family . . .

mouth open. (He remembers that she said something about how open mouths are a bad habit. She insists that flies will enter his mouth, and that if he sits like that long enough he will see for himself.)

When she says that he’s being annoying, he’d much rather watch as she tears the thin pages of his textbook or pushes him into the wall beneath the stairs. He would sometimes think, I would rather die than upset her.

“When I was in private school, and later in middle school, I heard things like, ‘Yeah, well my mom hits me with a belt and locks me in the bathroom,’ and I would say ‘So what?’” he said.

He admits that for most kids, this is not abuse — at least not in his community. It’s simply a product of upbringing, of parenting, of discipline. A brand of normal descended from a long-respected legacy.

“It’s the ‘discipline’ that made me so used to things,” he said. “It’s dangerous.

[It’s] blinding.”

He apologizes for not being able to speak for a few minutes. He knows that everything he says is dangerous. He knows what people think about his culture already and doesn’t want to imply that slapping or disciplining children is necessarily abuse.

But whether or not it’s abuse in the eyes of the law doesn’t matter to him. He doesn’t like it.

“It’s a norm, and I get that. I can only speak for myself,” he said. “But my mom loves me, and she still does what she does.

You can’t say, ‘Well, she does it out of the good of her heart.’ I disagree. It doesn’t mat-

may flee *This information was provided by Child Protective Services worker John Evitt. CPS immediate response ranges from two hours to two weeks.

hides a child

minimizing, denying, & blaming

“

Making light of an abuse after-the-fact — either by the victim or the instigator — is a common coping mechanism.

28

using intimidation

“

Making people feel fear through actions, gestures, weapons ...

I’ve seen many people smash things with anger.

“

When you r ability to m you’re takin relate to pe

EL ESTOQUE

ter the intention, if this is the result.”

All the love in the world, better work ethic, a sky-high GPA: it isn’t worth locking himself in his room on a weekly basis, shaking, picking at his toes until they permanently stained the bottom of his bathtub.

He notices a book in the corner of my room, the torn dust jacket slanted slightly in our direction.

“Is that yours?” he says.

I nod, and he picks up the book and flips through a few pages, head down, not quite reading the words.

“Ha, it’s the ‘Scarlet Letter,’” he says. “‘A’ for Abuse.”

The call to action

He calls the Child Protective Services in November of his freshman year.

He carries the kitchen phone into his room. There are muffled voices outside his door when he dials the CPS number for his county. He has it bookmarked. His fingers are damp and he drops the phone twice, hits the wrong keys, thinks about dropping the phone and running away.

“I can’t even remember how she answered my call. Or was it a he?” he said.

“But I remember exactly what I Googled: ‘CPS number California.’ I’d typed it in before, saved it, put it in my phone. Only to delete it all.”

But that day, he hits enter. That day, instead of rechecking his math homework to give to his mother for approval, he spends three breathless minutes on the phone with a stranger whose voice sounds about as wea-

using isolation

ou refuse someone the o meet up with friends, aking away their ability to people.

ry as he feels. He trembles, somehow managing to leave out two digits in his address.

The woman, or possibly the man, only needs the basics: Who are you? Where are you? Who are your parents? Have you sustained physical injury? How severe? Sexual contact? Abandonment? Guardian, impairment, history? Time, place, witnesses? The questions, and his responses, are little more

“

There’s this fear about talking to these people, because what if it’s like dialing the police when there’s no emergency?

than a blur.

“There’s this fear about talking to these people, because what if it’s like dialing the police when there’s no emergency?” he said.

“What if they say you’re full of bullshit?”

They asked about physical harm, and I kept thinking, ‘Well, I’m not black and blue. I’ve

using emotional abuse

“

never been unconscious. This isn’t A Child Called It.’” He’s never read “A Child Called It.” He doesn’t relate to it.

His life isn’t sensationalist or macabre, and he’s painfully aware of this as he talks to this faceless person on the phone. He doesn’t think his friends would be shocked, so why would CPS? Or maybe he secretly thinks they’ll both be shocked, and that’s

Putting someone down, playing mind tricks, causing guilt ...

I hear a lot about this one from high school children.

why he’s never said anything until now. How can he admit that every time his buddies say “My mom will kill me,” it sounds more prophetic than hyperbolic? That he fears for them, too?

The conversation ends before his mother knocks on his door and tells him to do his

using coercion & threats

“

‘I’ll never speak to you again’ or ‘I’ll make it hurt’ ... these threats are a common form of both psychological and physical abuse.

THE POWER & CONTROL PROGRESSION

BY HARINI SHYAMSUNDAR NOVEMBER 19, 2014

Explained by Cupertino-based Psychologist, Debra Gordon Ph.D. 29

SPECIAL

26% monthly

17% weekly

17% daily

How often are you verbally abused?*

54% yes

46% no

homework, and that she’s made his favorite food, garlic fried rice. He should come downstairs now. He does.

After dinner, he sits underneath his desk, cross-legged and scrawls underneath his desk with a fat Crayola marker — something his cousin once told him to do whenever he had a secret. The nicked white surface is so congested with purple and black and magenta ink (bruise colors, he notes wryly) that the topside and the flipside of the desk display a startling before-after.

“It’s totally true that other people can’t solve my problems after everything, all this time,” he said. “So this is where I try to write things I wish I had done sooner…”

He gestures at both the desk and his journal, which is one of the only un-stained objects he owns. He protects it, for the sake of his dreams. “[In my dreams] I don’t worry about anything but what kind of pencil lead to use,” he said. “I write about the past, but it hurts me less to see it on paper.” On another surface, one that he can crumple up and toss away, memories are soothingly distant.

“It’s impossible to completely detach [myself], though, even though all the therapists in the world would probably want me to separate my identity [from the] past,” he said. “But sadly, this is the way things are, this is what my parents, and so many parents, think is right.”

To challenge that, to pound on that garage door, to lift his head from the window sill and say, “It’s not okay” is simply not an option. Because he never wanted his parents to get in trouble. He never wanted them to be villified for investing in him in their own way, for grooming him, for always caring.

At least, that’s what he thinks on some days, maybe one or two out of three. Those

Have you ever been called “fat,” “stupid,” “ugly,” etc. by your parents or legal guardians?*

Do you consider being scratched, spanked, or hit by your parents or legal guardians abuse?*

73% 27% yes 30

are the sluggish afternoons when he remembers learning how to roller skate behind a church and burning trash in the backyard, the impromptu marshmallows. The warm weather. His mother would give him a hug every night, would frame his Tae Kwon Do medals in the maple case above the sink.

“Even after I called, before I called, at that time I wondered if I was being fair,” he said.

“Two seconds after the call, I wondered if I was in my right mind. Or if I was imagining some things ... if I was...” He trails off. Those doubts still cling to him, remaining long after he sets down the phone.

Two days later, there’s a knock on the door that he’s been waiting for since Thursday, waiting the way he waits for a package even if he knows he hasn’t ordered anything.

Waiting for waiting’s sake, even believing — no, knowing — that nothing is coming.

He even mistakes the dull thud of a bluejay flying into the bathroom window as the knock of his imagined savior at the door.

“I don’t know why I thought [CPS] wouldn’t come,” he said. “I knew they would come, I asked them to, I basically begged.”

He runs for the stairs and nearly falls down the steps, but before he can stop his sock feet from sliding into a wall, his mother opens the door. She’s wearing what he calls her “solicitor smile”: a bland, slightly irritated grin she uses whenever there’s a door-todoor salesman or a Girl Scout.

“I panicked. I felt so stupid. Or like I was watching somebody else’s mom,” he said.

“I ran into the kitchen and hid. Like a delinquent hiding from the police.”

He stares up at the cobwebs clinging to the underside of the kitchen counter, counts to a hundred and when he stands up again, he hears his mother upstairs. She’s talking rapidly into the phone, while the CPS worker, who seems to have been squatting next to him the whole time, speaks slowly into his left ear.

Have you ever been scratched, spanked or hit by your parents or legal guardians?*

51% yes

49% no

no

EL ESTOQUE

“By that point I was frantic,” he said. “I said that I didn’t want to leave home or anything, but she kept asking me to breathe and answer her questions.”

In retrospect, her tightening jaw, her tapping fingers and scanning eyes — a clinical brusqueness — was a blessing. A revelation.

“The way she took everything in, I hated it at first,” he said. “It was objectifying.”

Her gaze seemed cursory, as if appraising objects in a museum. And in a way, she was in a type of museum. Was she wondering if that pink plastic fly swatter was a weapon in disguise? Could she tell that that piano cover was once slammed down over his knuckles?

And was all of this so different from his neighbor’s home, his best friend’s home? He wondered all of these things.

Beginning of the end

While the social worker continues to scour the pantry, his mother continues to talk to his father over the phone. She isn’t scowling. Her brow isn’t even furrowed.

All she can do is repeat, “What’s happening?” And later, “Why?” She barely understands English, much less the CPS worker’s monotone interrogation, and for this, her son is both oddly grateful and disappointed. The social worker promises to bring a translator that same day, and all he can do is nod numbly and watch as his father returns home, stalling on the curb — no doubt wondering why there is another car in his usual spot.

The CPS worker, peering through the window, appears unfazed as another adult enters the kitchen, one even more disgruntled, as he swings the car door shut so hard that the entire car rattles. His father does not recognize the woman’s questions, but does seem to comprehend the phrases “present danger” and “intervention.” And with a rabid shake of his head, he dismisses the woman and attempts, at one point, to clutch her forearm and drag her towards the doorway.

“Part of me wanted to say, ‘Dad! You’re making it worse,’” he said. “But then part of me was like, ‘Yes. Yes, keep acting like that and she’ll definitely take me away.’”

Both parents declined to comment on the investigation and their son’s accusations, except for one admittance: “We were very distant when there were strangers in our house,” his father said, in Chinese. “We maybe should have been more understanding, but we did not want to be judged.”

But they were. And harshly, a little too harshly for their son’s taste, even though he admitted to exaggerating slightly while speaking with the CPS worker. He had read all the salmon-colored pamphlets he could find. He knew what to say to be placed in Category III at least.

“I felt like I could rig the system to get the outcome I wanted,” he said. “I didn’t want to manipulate them, but I knew how clean our house was and I really wanted … I really just wanted someone to believe me.”

They did. He didn’t need to lie: his bruises and sore palms were affirmation enough, as well as his apparent “twitchiness.”

“She actually said that. She said aloud, ‘You seem twitchy,’” he said, laughing. And yet despite this moment of comic absurdity, his face is flushed and sweating, his hands even more sore from clenching and relaxing his fists in anticipation.

“I told [my social worker] that no matter what, my mom still had to be in my life, that I had to talk to her,” he said. “And at first they had no promises. They were required to refer me to services, and that’s when I realized therapy was an option.”

For the first time, he gives a full-toothed smile, returning to me the copy of “The Scarlet Letter.”

Therapy was a pseudo-cure, one that made him both more and less anxious. On one hand, he had someone to believe him.

But on the other hand, now there was some-

one to believe him, someone to remind him that his culture was “sick” in some way, that his parents were “sick” in some way.

He doesn’t believe that, not entirely. In one journal that he kept from eighth grade, the entire back cover, made of fake leather and duct tape, was plastered with photos.

The Halloween parade, when his mother let him be the green Power Ranger and made his costume from scratch. St. Patrick’s Day, when they made a paper weight out of plastic, glue and a four-leaf clover he’d found.

When his father propped him up on his broad shoulders and walked through Jollyman Park, when his pudgy, little-boy fingers could reach up and brush the green leaves.

“I don’t believe any of that is over,” he said. “No matter what. And now I have [new] friends, now, when it seems kind of too late ... but I can’t afford to believe that it’s too late.”

One week later, in his own room, he glances at one of his new friends, who has her Biology notebook open on her lap. She’s doodling along the margins, blueprints of tattoos she wants to get someday. One of them is an illustration of a bleeding rose stabbed by a golden thorn, all sketched out in blue pen with the caption “Who’s rose?

Who’s thorn?” She looks up.

“Is there a difference [between] those things, slapping once and slapping twice?”

She smiles. “I don’t think we have that figured out yet.”

“What are you going to do until then?”

I ask.

“Until then, we … we walk on…” he says. He pauses. “What’s the word?” Both he and his friend start laughing, and don’t stop until the song that’s playing on his laptop has faded out, and a new Top 50 tune begins.

“Eggshells?” I provide, smiling. “Do you mean eggshells?”

“Right,” he says. “We walk on eggshells.

Eggshells. Eggshells all around.” k.chang@elestoque.org

Do you know anyone at MVHS who has been either physically or verbally abused by their parents or guardians?*

55% 45% yes

no

* Percentages from an online El Estoque survey of 234 students NOVEMBER 19. 2014

31

SPORTS

Sharon Tung| El Estoque Illustration

34-35

36-37

Out of their league

ORGANIZED CHAOS

Taking a break

Football team finds difficulty in a new league

Athletic trainer Marie Gishifu treats injuries across all sports

ACL tears shorten athletesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; seasons

33 32

EL ESTOQUE

Justin Kim | El Estoque

OUT OF THEIR LEAGUE

Higher division increases football injuries

BY NATHAN DESAI

Five.

However, the problem may cut much Last year the varsity football team deeper than that. It’s an ailment that not had an undefeated record of 5-0 in league only causes the team to struggle, but is also games, ending the regular season on a six a byproduct of the Matadors’ struggles in its game winning streak. The Matadors never new league: injuries. lost at home, had an average margin of vicMVHS has dealt with an extraordinary tory of 26 points and only allowed 17.1 amount of football injuries this season. Alpoints per game. though none have been particularly major, But things are different this year. As of these injuries have thinned an already bareNov. 6, the team is 0-5, currently on a seven bones roster, keeping some key players out game losing streak despite winning their of important games. opening game at Alameda High School.

“I think [against] Saratoga [High School] They have yet to win at home, have lost their games by an when it’s a serious average of 27.9 points and have only scored 18.3 points health concern, that’s per game. when changes need to The clear difference between last year and this year senior Sam Nastari be applied. is their league. Champions of the El Camino League in 2013, MVHS was promoted to the more competitive De Anza League — a team we easily could have beaten if we this season. had our full team — we had 11 players inDespite being promoted for their success jured and I believe seven of those were startlast season, MVHS has had difficulty this ers,” Nastari said. “It hurts you mentally year. It’s clear that the team lost some key because you know you could be beating that players after graduation, including class of team.”

2014 alumnus Justin Cena, with the school It is clear that the injuries keep MVHS record for rushing yards in a season with from reaching their potential in the De Anza 1,550 in 2013. It is also inevitable that the league, as they have to play games without league is more difficult and the team is un- a considerable portion of their roster. Howfamiliar with the competition. ever, the tougher league also contributes to “Last year we won a lot more and this the team’s struggles as the Matadors often year we’re not winning as much because find themselves outmatched, which can lead we’re playing [much] better teams,” senior to injuries.

Sam Nastari said.

“Size alone causes that problem,” head NOVEMBER 19, 2014

coach Jeff Mueller said. “The fact [is] that the kids we are playing are a lot bigger than us.”

MVHS has nine players that weigh at least 200 pounds, with the heaviest weighing 265. Wilcox High School has 15 players that weigh at least 200 pounds, four of which weigh at least 265 pounds.

Obviously MVHS’ injuries are a major health concern and the Santa Clara Valley Athletic League — which oversees the De Anza League and El Camino League — has adapted the bylaws to prevent these kinds of problems from occuring in future seasons.

According to Mueller, league realignment will now depend on conditions such as how many players are graduating in addition to a team’s overall performance.

Though the changes are to be implemented now, Nastari believes that they should have been instituted before.

“I have nothing against good competition,” he said. “I love facing really good competition. It’s fun to be challenged and it’s good to face losing sometimes. But when it’s a serious health concern, that’s when changes need to be applied and that’s something that should have happened.”

In spite of the new bylaws, MVHS’ problems this season have them in dead last in the De Anza League and Mueller foresees a regulation awaiting the Matadors at the end of the season.

“I would expect us to be back in the El Camino [League next year],” Mueller said. n.desai@elestoque.org

33

Malini Ramaiyer | El Estoque

SPORTS

Avni Prasad | El Estoque

Organized chaos Trainer Marie Gishifu finds order in a busy field

BY ALINA ABIDI AND MALINI RAMAIYER

T

he over whelming scent of Bengay fills the trainer’s office. Three students sit around the room talking to the trainer over the booming ice machine as she scoops ice into bags, brings the bags to her mouth and sucks the air out before t ying them up.

One athlete tries to convince the trainer that his concussion is a mere headache, but she isn’t buying it. Another student quietly waits on an examination bench for rehabilitation with the trainer. He and another football player occupy two of the three benches, and first aid kits take over the other.

Ever y corner of the room is filled with athletic and medical paraphernalia that the trainer navigates around as she approaches the athlete who has just walked into her office. Rolls of pre-wrap, water bottles, Nivea body lotion, notebooks, sunglasses, scissors and two cans of TufSkin tape adhesive lay on her desk, but trainer Marie Gishifu is calm and composed as she asks sophomore Monica Haskell a few questions.

“Whenever I’m running, I can feel a

34

slight popping,” Haskell says, who just walked over from field hockey practice.

Gishifu, who helped Haskell earlier in the week, instructs her to stretch out her hip against the door frame. Haskell thanks her and leaves. Gishifu moves on to her next patient.

Ever y day, Gishifu deals with scratches, scrapes and sprains — her job is stressful.

However, through years of experience, a little assistance and a lot of improvisation, Gishifu has nailed down a routine that helps athletes across all sports.

Gishifu began working at MVHS four years ago, equipped with a degree in kinesiology and an open mind.

“When I first star ted, it was just ner ve-racking,” Gishifu said. “It was over whelming because it was just me, by myself, taking care of ever yone.”

However, after four years of experience at MVHS, Gishifu has per fected her procedure. When an athlete walks in, limps in or stumbles in, leaning on teammates, Gishifu first verifies that there are no bone fractures, which would mean calling an ambulance. She has only had

Funny pain (Above) Gishifu tapes junior Ben Hansen’s ankle before football practice as junior Joseph Kim waits for rehabilitation on Nov. 3.

Athletes across all sports visit Gishifu before and after practice. lending a hand (TOP LEFT) Athletic trainer Marie Gishifu examines a Lynbrook High School field hockey player on Oct.30. Gishifu attended the game to cheer on MVHS and watch over the athletes.

EL ESTOQUE

Avni Prasad | El Estoque

thopedic surgeon, he had the opportunity to work with Gishifu.

When McCall and McGuire contacted Gishifu, she was ecstatic that she had a doctor and an assistant by her side. Sophomore Meghan Rai also provides some extra help before football practice each day. She’s sure that she will continue when football is over, but she’s not sure how she began.

Gishifu’s work day begins in Los Altos, where she is a physical therapist. She arrives at her MVHS office at 2:30 p.m. along with McGuire. While Gishifu works on helping students, the two assistants provide assistance by filling up the the water jugs and dropping them off at practices and games with Gishifu’s golf car t. During practice, when the stream of injured students slows down, Gishifu works on paper work while McGuire and Rai hold ice bag filling competitions. “[McGuire] takes care of the smaller things, which makes a big difference,” Gishifu said.

In addition to attending football games, both home and away, Gishifu and McGuire conduct rehabilitation. McGuire helps concussed athletes recover with elliptical exercises in the weight room and Gishifu helps ever yone else On Oct. 29, Gishifu and McGuire walked out to the upper field with football players juniors Ben Hansen and Joseph Kim to begin that day’s rehabilitation. Underneath the afternoon sun, Gishifu and McGuire each watched the athletes run through their sunglasses and coolly gave them feedback.

Although treating hundreds of athletes can become chaotic, Gishifu gets the job done.

“I feel a lot safer when she’s there,” Haskell said, “knowing that if something happens she’s there to help.”

Amidst her organized chaos, Gishifu just needs the word of a frantic teammate to drop ever y thing, hop on her golf car t and race to the field, ready to help.

to call an ambulance twice — once for possible kidney damage and once for a dislocated kneecap. Once she has ruled out a bone fracture, she examines the soft tissue to narrow down the t ype of injur y.

Gishifu treats a wide variet y of injuries, so most of her work involves thinking on her feet. Despite her experience, she can always use an extra pair of hands.

This year, for the first year, she has two.

Junior Jackson McGuire always managed to get hur t, so he has been interested in the medical field from a young age.

Through his family doctor, Dr. David McCall, who is also the football team’s orNOVEMBER 19, 2014

a.abidi@elestoque.org | m.ramaiyer@elestoque.org

DID YOU KNOW?

58 %

of high schools don’t have access to athletic trainers Southwestern athletic trainer association

25.7

%

of high school injuries are to the face or head university of colorado denver

62 %

of organized sports injuries occur during practice university of rochester

3x

as many high school football athletes are “catastrophically injured” as college athletes Southwestern athletic trainer association 35

SPORTS

TAKING A BREAK

“

As athletes become more involved in their sports, the ACL injury poses a threat to their athletic progress.

Whenever I tried bending, it felt like a steak knife being jammed in my knee.

BY KALPANA GOPALKRISHNAN ILLUSTRATIONS BY SHARON TUNG

I

t was Friday the 13th when senior Dmitriy Gutnik fell. At school soccer practice in December 2013, Gutnik received the ball and dribbled it past the defender. He started to sprint, but the defender stuck out his leg and caught Gutnik’s foot. The whole lower part of his leg twisted, locking up as he fell. The team went silent. Gutnik rolled on the field as he tried his hardest not to scream.

Two weeks after the fall, Gutnik received confirmation with an MRI scan. He had torn his anterior cruciate ligament or ACL. Although he was ready for surgery as soon as he found out, his family could not cancel their annual trip to Lake Tahoe. Gutnik watched them ski and waited. Waited for his final MRI results. Waited for the surgery. Waited to be able to play soccer again.

The anterior cruciate ligament is one of four ligaments in the knee. Like a rope that connects the shin and thigh bones, the ACL helps guide the movement of these bones as the body pivots. When an athlete hears that familiar “pop,” the rope has been broken. For MVHS athletes, an ACL forces an unwanted break in their sports careers.

One of the most cumbersome parts of the ACL healing process is waiting. The typical patient with a torn ACL takes about a year to return to normal athletic ability. For Gutnik, this meant months of practice, college showcase opportunities, countless games and a school sports season missed.

However, that same intense training is the probable culprit of the athlete’s ACL tear.

Since 2002, the risk of athletes tearing the ACL in the U.S. has gone up by 400 percent according to doctors in Philadelphia.

As youth sports become more competitive than ever, athletes feel the pressure to play their sport yearlong. The payback: their bodies bear the burden. A former flyer on the MVHS cheer team, junior Ashley Win en-

36

senior Dmitriy Gutnik

Joshua Hsieh | El Estoque

Looking forward Senior Dmitriy Gutnik attends boys soccer tryouts on Nov. 12. Despite his recent ACL injury, Gutnik continues to play school soccer and club soccer.

dured jumps, kicks, and stunts. But a toss in the air always left a sense of uncertainty on the way back down.

“When [people] see cheer, they’re like, oh, pom-poms and cheering,” Win said.

“But it’s actually the most injury [prone] sport ever.”

It was January 2014 when Win’s body answered to the toll of her yearlong sport.

In the middle of a jump, snap, her leg bent inward in half. She’d always had a high pain tolerance, but this one hurt. After a couple of visits to the doctor, Win received her results.

EL ESTOQUE

2.

Girls have fewer nerve cells going to their knee muscles, and therefore have less neuromuscular control.

1.

Girls have a wider pelvis, which adds more pressure to the ACL and thigh muscle.

3.

3girlsreasons why are more likely

The slope of a girl’s shin bone is higher, which stresses the ACL..

to tear their ACLs According to Dr. Jeffrey Bui of Kaiser Permanente Santa Clara

Bone contusion. Sprained MCL. Torn ACL. She had had no idea the injuries were there.

Dr. Jeffrey Bui, an orthopedic surgeon at Kaiser Permanente in Santa Clara, has noticed that a year-round sport often corresponds to fatigue. The ACL cannot handle the constant stress of exercise without rest.

“When athletes participate when they’re fatigued,” Bui said, “their muscles don’t have the same ability to absorb shock. It puts [the athlete] in a compromising position.”

However, for most athletes, stepping out on training isn’t an option. No potent strategies to prevent ACL tears have been discovered, so most patients opt for surgery. In fact, methods of ACL repair have become so advanced that some athletes can return to play after only five months, which is less than half of the usual recovery time.

Senior Jasraj Ghuman, a varsity football player, succumbed to a consecutive partially torn left and a sprained right ACL during the last two years. But for him, the injuries NOVEMBER 19, 2014

were a pause, not a setback. With rehab and a knee brace, Ghuman was able to continue play in the 2013 and 2014 seasons. Still, Ghuman has become more cautious in play.

“If there is a tackle, you double guess jumping on the pile,” Ghuman said. “You don’t go as hard as you would have.”

Dr. Bui himself has observed the psychological toll of an ACL injury. Although the body can heal, minds do not forget the wounds so easily. Ghuman is more careful on the field. Win quit cheer in fear of tearing her other ACL and now devotes her time to yearbook. Gutnik still remembers the sleepless nights from after the surgery. Fixing an injured ACL means waiting — painful, tiresome and expensive waiting.

The worst part of the physical and mental process is the week after the surgery, after the painkillers fade away. For Gutnik, the week was the worst of his life.

“Whenever I tried bending, it felt like a steak knife being jammed into my knee.”

Gutnik said.

Nonetheless, Gutnik furiously tackled the rehab process to beat the injury as it had beat him. Deemed “recovered,” he has returned to his premier Santa Clara Sporting team and plans to join the varsity boys team at MVHS as well. The injury has completed its cycle.

Yet, Gutnik’s intense schedule does not change. His weakened ACL will now bear the same burden as before. He is a marked man, six times more likely to retear his ACL than before and at a higher risk of arthritis and other knee injuries.

Now, a year later, Gutnik is back on the upper field at school soccer tryouts. He laces his cleats, does two high knees and runs onto the field with his knee brace as the only visible reminder of his surgery. Even though he knows the risks, his love of the game outweighs his fear of retearing his ACL.

k.gopalkrishnan@elestoque.org

37

SPORTS

Outside the line Stanford game triggers flashback to volleyball years

A

fter school at my friend junior Rachael Matthew’s house, later at Peet’s and even on the way to the game, all I could think about was buying a Stanford University sweatshirt. College sweatshirts are cool. I forgot that volleyball was all I could think about two years ago.

I met Rachael on the MVHS freshman team.

This team was for misfits not good enough to make junior varsity but committed enough to be on a team. We never talk about volleyball anymore, but a few weeks ago, Rachael asked me if I wanted to come to the Stanford vs.

UCLA game.

We entered the arena. I gravitated toward the apparel stand but Rachael yanked me away to find our seats. We walk down a set of stairs and there in front of us was the stadium. A sea of red in the middle sections close to the court and random on the sides. Rachael wore gray and I wore white, so we sat higher up on the outside. Balls began flying so high, that most were at my eye level. The players bumped, they set and they spiked. Suddenly, I felt the need to run down to the court and join them. A 5-foot-4 high schooler runs down in her fake Vans and begins playing with 6-foot elite athletes in Mizuno volleyball shoes.

Yikes.

I used to have volleyball shoes — knee pads, spandex and headbands too. These athletic accessories come from my short-lived yet trying volleyball career.

I tried out in middle school all three years because my dad plays and I thought I could learn through osmosis. I tried out for the C team — the short people team — in sixth grade. I didn’t make it. I tried out for the sixseven team in seventh grade after participating in United States Youth Volleyball League in the park for a year. I didn’t even make the first cut.

I tried out for the eighth grade team. I made it through first and second cut, but I didn’t make the last cut.

Freshman year though, I made it. As a mediocre player on the worst team, I loved it.

The next year, I didn’t make the team.

After one quick year, volleyball has become so distant that I can no longer distinguish a top38

spin serve from a floater. I don’t know any more than a spectator. I am outside the line.

Inside the line, Stanford players dominated. The key to their success was their blocking with six-footeight player, Merete Lutz merely raising her hands to tip the ball to the other side.

In the second set, UCLA improved and lost by only two points. The five-year-old girls in pink shirts and pink pants behind us shrieked and the crazy band continued to drum each other’s heads with mallets.

The set ended at 30-28. I remembered the worry during close sets like this. I remembered the anxiety that came over me as I worried about missing the serve or shanking the pass. The game would be over in a split second because of my mistake.

Volleyball used to take over my thoughts and now it hadn’t crossed my mind for a year. This hiatus allowed to me to find passions that I am more than mediocre in and others that I’m still mediocre in. I was glad that I stopped, even though it wasn’t my choice a year ago.

After the second set, we stood in line to find that they only had size large sweatshirts. After a series of

MALINI RAMAIYER ROOKIE OF THE YEAR

are-you-sure’s and don’t-you-have-more’s, we headed back and sat down for the third set.

This set was interesting. I developed my own cheer to counter the five-year-olds’ shrieking behind us for whenever Stanford’s Jordan Burgess pounded the ball down. While theirs resembled a scene from “Daddy Day Care,” my cheer was noble, incorporating more of a roar than a scream. UCLA won.

While cheering, I remembered the fun parts of volleyball. I remembered the times when my hits actually went over the net — they usually sailed under.

I remembered why I willingly woke up at 5 a.m. to attend tournaments in Salinas or Gilroy every weekend — I enjoyed sleeping in the car. I remembered why I got “Most Inspirational” freshman year — I cheered on every play. I truly enjoyed playing on a team.

Walking out of the stadium, I thought about the game. Maybe I’ll play volleyball again soon. Of course, I won’t bother trying out for the team. Though I don’t I have a sweatshirt, I’m at a Stanford level now. m.ramaiyer@elestoque.org

EL ESTOQUE

What’s in your bag?

Junior Anshu Jain’s main football gear STORY AND PHOTOS BY SHARON TUNG

1 2 3

4 5 6 7

Shoulder pads have straps that tighten to protect the torso. The bulky pads come in handy during hard contact. “They make me feel like the Hulk. It makes your body so much bigger than it really is.”

4 1

Cleats have spikes on the bottom to dig into grass and help football players explode off the line when the ball is snapped.

The helmet has padding on the inside to protect the head. The chin strap holds down the helmet so it will not come off. The facemask protects the face when it comes in contact with another player. To protect the teeth, the player wears the mouth guard that is attached to the helmet.

5 2

Pants have built in knee pads to prevent turf burns, which can happen when a player falls down.

A belt keeps the pants tight.

Girdles have pads around the thighs and hips, places that experience significant impact during hits.

Jain carries a stereo in his locker that he bought from Costco. Before practice in the locker room, he plays fast, upbeat songs on stereo such as “Headband” by B.O.B.

6 3

7

Football players wear their equipment directly to practice or games. They keep their gear in their lockers to store it.

Junior Anshu Jain joined the MVHS football team during his sophomore year when one of his friends told him the team needed larger players. As one of the star players on the team, he occasionally serves as captain during games. As an offensive lineman, Jain blocks defensive players, to make holes for the runningback or let the quarterback throw. To be a good football player, Jain says it is important to enjoy hitting other people and getting beaten up, otherwise it is impossible to make plays. “That’s what our coach tells us, you have to be aggressive. You have to want to win, want to hit,” Jain said.The equipment he wears to games and practice help protect him from harm. s.tung@elestoque.org

NOVEMBER 19, 2014

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