- By Emily Kloogh -
INTRODUCTION Page 02
1
THE ART OF PLAY Page 03
2
PARENTING: THEN VERSUS NOW Page 09
3
THE ISSUE OF SCREEN TIME Page 17
4
THE BENEFITS OF PLAY Page 25
5
BE THE CHANGE IN YOUR CHILD Page 31
2 AN INTRODUCTION “You’ve joined the bandwagon of modern day parenting. You know, the one where instead of grazed knees and a bump to the head, children receive an underdeveloped brain and have difficulty forming real relationships. That’s right folks, it’s the 21st Century and The Bubble Wrap Revolution is here.”
No longer are kids riding bikes, climbing trees, or expanding their imagination by taking that cardboard box to the moon. You know why? It starts with you, and because there’s a chance your child could get hurt, you would have take time out of your busy day to see to it, and that’s something you don’t have time for do you? It’s much easier to shut them up with the aid of a screen, it’s easier and more efficient, they enjoy it and it keeps them quiet. Now I realise we live in the 21st Century and screen time is inevitable, but balance is the key to a truly happy child, and the Art of Play must not get lost in this ever expanding sea of full HD, super AMOLED displays. This guide will have you reminiscing back to your childhood and then bring you back down to earth with the current developing problem of the ‘I-Generation’. It will explain the reasons why we are setting our kids up for a loss, and what you can do to change their futures. So team, this is it. There’s no going back. It’s time to remove the bubble-wrap and rekindle the Art of Play in your child.
the
art of
play
lost SOMEWHERE
HERE
BETWEEN & THE
20th century
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PLAY (noun)
Activity engaged in for enjoyment and recreation, especially by children. “A child at play may use a stick as an aeroplane”
Exploration, curiousity, imagination, wonder. Spontaneity, discovery and creativity. The sheer joy of old fashioned play. The kind that you grew up with, where cardboard boxes could fly to the moon, and where countless hours were spent cleaning enclosures of the zoo you’d created in your backyard. Yes, play, a non-threatening context where our children can learn about their world and gain skills necessary for development, and the transition into adult life. However, old-fashioned play is becoming a thing of the past and our children’s futures are in jeopardy. We are living in an I-Generation, where kids are being distracted by the use of a screen. I know we live busy lives, and no longer are the days when women stayed home during the day, keeping herself busy by looking after the children, cleaning the house from top to bottom, and preparing a candle lit dinner for her hubby’s arrival at the end of the day. No, these days we are career driven women. Babies are put to the side while a career is put in place, in fact in 2010 the average age of first time mother’s had risen to 30 years old, compared to 26 years old in the 1980’s. We now
have less time to spend with our children and so, are having to rely on other means to “babysit” them. Play and the act of traditional play are no longer incorporated into a child’s day. No longer do children have the freedom to explore the woods and fields and find their own special places. Kids are getting challenging and risky activities removed from their lives because society is worried they will hurt themselves. Time and money would then have to be spent in order to deal with the problem, something we just simply can’t afford. Physical education and recess are being eliminated from schools altogether and new schools are being built without playgrounds. Something a little close to home, in Australia, a Sydney primary school has banned students from performing handstands and cartwheels in the playground, unless under the direct supervision of a trained gymnastics teacher. I remember us entertaining ourselves for hours just having handstand competitions and seeing who could last the longest. Where is the outdoor fun in our children’s lives anymore?
7 completely limiting challenges to their creativity and imaginations, as well as limiting necessary challenges to their bodies, which in turn affect their sensory and motor development. Children between the ages of eight and 18 spend about eight hours daily watching TV, using cellphones, or playing video games. Free time is precious Creative play is a central activity in the lives of healthy young children. It allows them to digest life and make it their own. It is an outlet for the fullness of their creativity and a critical part of their childhood. We are convinced that we need to “teach” young children how to live in today’s society when in reality young children are born with the urge to grow and learn on their own. Sure we need to lend a helping hand when things go wrong, and create an appropriate place for them to experience, explore, play and learn, but we need to realise that the child’s love of learning is intimately linked with an enthusiasm for play. With the introduction of technology into our children’s lives we have developed a laziness to use it as a babysitter. Juggling school, work, home and community lives, parents are now relying heavily on communication technology, and transportation technology to make their lives faster and more efficient. Children now rely on technology for the majority of their play,
“Play is an outlet for the fullness of their creativity and a critical part of their childhood” and a rarity and so family time is now spent indoors in pre-planned activities that offer maximum bonding time. Research shows that 58% of today’s children aged 2-5 know how to play a basic computer game, while only 43% of kids aged 2-3 can ride a bike. Not only is the lack of creative play having a degrading effect on development, but also children are being denied the opportunity to learn about risk and how to manage it in the real world of the communities they live in. The willingness to engage in some risky activities provides opportunities to learn new skills, try new behaviours and ultimately reach our potential. Challenge and risk, in particular during outdoor play, allows children to test
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the limits of their physical, intellectual and social development. Through exposure to carefully managed risks, children learn sound judgement in assessing risk themselves, building confidence, resilience, and self-belief, qualities essential for their eventual independence. The mixture of heightened media coverage of abductions, and paedophiles filling our brains with the idea that you can’t trust the neighbourhood you live in, and our lack of time to deal with any injury resulting from “unsafe” activities, have all contributed to the lack of physical play and risk in today’s children. We are making “play time” so sterile and unstimulating that children may actually place themselves at greater risk of injury as they seek to inject some excitement back into the activity. The tendency to wrap children in bubble-wrap has transformed how they experience childhood. Reasonable worry conveys to children they are loved; senseless ungrounded worry debilitates children in ways far worse than a few bumps and bruises they may experience without us. There is an element of risk in everything that we do; sooner or later you need to accept that you can’t protect your kids from everything.
We need to realise that the child’s love of learning is intimately linked with an enthusiasm for play
12 CHILDHOOD (noun)
The time or state of being a child. “He spent his childhood in Lewes.”
The tendency to wrap kids in bubble-wrap has transformed how they experience childhood. According to research 79 per cent of adults had their biggest childhood experiences in outdoor spaces among trees, rivers and woods, compared with only 29 per cent of children today. Put simply, children have lost the ability to play. With the introduction of technology, screens are shoved in our faces nearly everywhere we go, and this along with increased media coverage of child molestations, murders and kidnappings, is altering our parenting ways and affecting our children’s futures. When we once took a more unconditional, tough love approach, we now take a more politically correct, do-everything-by-thebook approach, leaving kids without a proper childhood, and forcing them to grow up faster than they actually mature. A major study by Play England found that half of all kids have been stopped climbing trees, 21 per cent have been banned from playing conkers and 17 per cent have been told they cannot play games of tag. Some are even being banned from playing Hide and Seek. We are now living in a world with a “safety first and last” culture. The Health and Safety Department is now constantly on our case about every little thing our children do, when we lived in a world where at age 7, we
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rode our bikes everywhere, totally alone, without even a second thought from anyone. We went to the park after school with friends, without telling our parents (they just knew), and we stayed out until it got dark or we got hungry – which ever came first. We had learned to tie our shoelaces before we started kindergarten, and computers, complete with dial-up Internet, were used solely for research projects, and visiting Bored.com. These days, there is no tough love. We are choosing politically correct ways of disciplining our children, and parenting in such a way as to “preserve their dignity and develop their valuable self-confidence”. We are overprotecting our children so greatly that they are not even
allowed to play outside without parental supervision, and this lack of creative play means they are missing out on developing key skills necessary for adulthood. We are creating children that once left to their own devices, fear the outside world and struggle to cope with any challenge they may have to face without us. Not only do our children’s cognitive and physical development suffer, but they are starting to resent their parents from taking away their ability to choose and make their own decisions, making them miserable and fretful about the future. Research by the Children’s Society found that ‘choice’ and family affected happiness the most. One in eight children was unhappy about
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their lack of autonomy, such as not being able to do things on their own or make their own decisions. 13 per cent of students surveyed said they were actually worried about their future. Do you want the future leaders of our country worried and afraid to face adulthood without us? Or would you rather they to grow up to be healthy, happy and successful, with a sound knowledge of the outside world and prepared to take on anything that life throws at them? I know for me, the latter is my choice, but its up to you.
3.
THE
U S E S I
screen time
20 It’s convenient and it shuts them up, leaving you to have that rare coffee date, free of interruptions from your kid. Well, while your increased need to use a screen to “babysit” your child may be convenient to your busy life, in reality it is doing your child damage, changing their development in more ways than one.
BRAIN DEVELOPMENT Technology is “rewiring” children’s brains and the act of technology overuse is having a huge influence on brain development by diminishing brain activity. It encourages rapid, continuous task switching and we are only processing information at a shallow level, meaning we’re not able to have complex thoughts but only superficial ones. This level of thinking leads to a decrease in attention and attention span. Attention is seen as the gateway to thinking and without it other aspects of thinking, such as perception, memory, language, learning, creativity, reasoning, problem solving and decision making are greatly diminished or can’t occur at all. The ability of
your children to learn to focus effectively and consistently lays the foundation for almost all aspects of their growth and is fundamental to their development into successful, happy people. Hard-wired for high speed, today’s young are entering school struggling with self-regulation and attention skills necessary for learning.
PHYSICAL DEVELOPMENT Obesity The increased use of technology as a means of “play time” has evidently lead to a decrease in outdoor, rough and tumble play. Research shows that kids are one third less likely to play outside the same ways their parents did. This is leading to a decrease in physical activity in both playtime and extra curricular activities, and a growing problem of obesity. Alongside this is the way that children usually snack while engrossed in technology, and these foods are usually high calorie, unhealthy snacks influenced by advertisements for junk food and boredom.
21 Anxiety Smartphones are causing enough anxiety that they are being checked every 15 minutes, often to help reduce the anxiety of missing out on important information. Being connected has become the norm and our comfort zone. Any break from that norm whether it be a loss of internet connection or mobile reception, or the absence of a communication device takes us out of our comfort zone and can create real feelings of loss and anxiety.
SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT
Relationships Kids don’t communicate via a phone call, and faceto-face interaction with friends has been replaced by chatting on Facebook, and a great loss of ability to interact or talk on a more personal level occurs. Non-verbal cues such as eye contact and body
involved in extracurricular activities. A big cause of this is related to the way they are so used to multitasking while using the devices and so they have trouble focussing on their school work. The use of social media and communicating
Any break from the norm of connectivity takes us out of our comfort zone. This can create real feelings of loss and anxiety. language, which may be responsible for 70% of our understanding of human messages, are not available via screen interaction, and traits such as empathy are being diminished. The lack of physical human contact means that kids aren’t learning vital social skills and are struggling to form basic skills and emotional reactions. Their social development is suffering leading to a difficulty in forming real relationships, in real life situations. Education As would be assumed, children who spend too much time in front of the screen tend to have worse grades than those students who are active and
using some form of keyboard has lead to a decrease in the ability, ease and speed in which children can handwrite. Students who wrote regularly on computers lost penmanship skills that might lead to lower scores on tests and exams. Some Australian schools have felt the need to incorporate handwriting lessons in years 11 and 12 as students find they have to relearn the art of using a pen and paper quickly, in order to be able to sit exams.
22 SOCIAL MEDIA
Online Footprint they knew what they were getting up to online. In New Zealand, the average digital birth A majority of parents fear what their child happens at around 6 months. The convenience posts on social media sites and are increasingly of being able to post photos straight from your worried they could be affecting their future phone has meant that 41% of newborns have education, dating or career prospects later in life. an online life from birth, and 82% of children under two currently have some kind of digital Ostracism & Narcissism footprint with images posted of them online. A New Zealand study has Despite Facebook restricting shown that for pre-teens, access to under 13’s, New teenagers, and even young Zealand children as young as Girls would rather adults, even very small doses 11 are on the social media site. tolerate bullying of ostracism by a peer group Our countries children are in preference to causes negative changes in self becoming social media adults esteem. Girls, in particular, by the age of 11, and most ostracism. said they would rather tolerate have learnt how to open a bullying in preference to web browser before they have ostracism. The pressure not learnt how to tie their shoes. to be ignored creates the pressure to be noticed, leading young people to be outrageous and Anxiety in Parents extreme in what they do or say online. The There has become a widespread anxiety within boost in self-esteem received from peers “liking” parents, surrounding social media and how 21st or “commenting” on their posts, is making our century children are using it. In a study of 407 children extremely narcissistic. All that selfNew Zealanders, 44% of those questioned had esteem leads them to be disappointed when the accessed their child’s Facebook profile without real “offline world” refuses to honour how great their permission, and 60% of New Zealand they are. parents had friended their child on Facebook so
MENTAL HEALTH
Children these days are being labelled as the IGeneration, and studies indicate that technology overuse is not only changing brain chemistry but is also increasing the likelihood of children developing mental illnesses, appropriately labelled I-Disorder’s. Video game and Internet addictions share the characteristics of other serious addictions, including emotional shut down, lack of concentration, and even withdrawal symptoms if the gadgets are removed. Findings show that children as young as seven become aggressive, irritable, and hostile when deprived of their IPad’s or laptops.
Technology use is a huge problem in children of today’s generation and so many studies just highlight the horrible effects of it on our children’s cognitive, social and physical development. Here are some sobering facts relating to the issue.
55% Amount of waking life spent using technology for noneducational purposes. - Kaiser Foundation
8,000 Number of murders witnessed by a child who frequently uses video games, before they even finish Intermediate. – A.C. Neilson
The estimated decrease of hours per week, children spend in old-fashioned play than they did a decade ago. – Unknown Sources
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7.1
The average amount of apps New Zealand children are accessing a month. – New Generations
3 in 10
Number of parents that have rules about how much time their kids can spend watching television or playing computer games. – Stuff.co.nz
54
Of car trips are to take kids to school, where school is within walking distance from home. – SPARC NZ
Percentage of 4-6 year olds would rather watch TV, when asked to choose between watching TV and spending quality time with their fathers. – A.C. Neilson
Of Kiwi children have similar online habits to mature adults by age 11. – AVG Technologies
4.
THE
benefits of
child’s play
Children learn as they play. Most importantly, in play children learn how to learn. - O. Fred Donaldson Contemporary American Martial Arts Master
BRAIN DEVELOPMENT
There is a close link between play and healthy cognitive growth. It provides hands on experiences with real-life materials that help children develop abstract scientific and mathematical concepts. Kids that engage in free play become accustomed to being independent, which encourages them to think independently in other situation that includes problem solving. Exposure to natural environments improves children’s cognitive development by improving their awareness, reasoning and observational skills. Their play is more diverse with imaginative and creative play that fosters language and collaborative skills.
Kids that engage in free play become accustomed to being independent
A 2009 study in the Journal of School Health found that the more physical activity tests children can pass, the more likely they are to do well on academic tests. This suggests that hours on end in the classroom may not be the best way to improve test scores and learning.
PHYSICAL DEVELOPMENT There’s evidence that active children grow into active adults, decreasing their risk of heart disease, obesity and other associated health problems. Children who play regularly in natural environments show more advanced motor fitness, including coordination, balance and agility, and they are sick less often. By getting kids outdoors they are burning more energy than if they sat in front of the TV. They are also less likely to snack while active and so physical play is seen as a natural preventative for obesity.
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29 SOCIAL DEVELOPMENT
Better Behaviour If you know any eight year old, you’ll know that keeping them focussed for six hours with only one 25-minute break for lunch is extremely difficult, if not completely impossible. Taking away recess for children is counterproductive and they usually behave better in the classroom when they have the chance to blow off steam on the playground during the day. Children with ADHD are shown to be able to better concentrate in a classroom environment after contact with the outdoors. Relationships Play teaches kids to, well, play nice. Play promotes social interaction and social skills and competence. A child who plays both with parents and peers, learns how relationships work through their play experiences. The number of friendships and the quality of their friendships usually increase, as play becomes more a part of their life. Kids learn to share, negotiate and resolve conflict building stronger relationships and bettering their social skills for the transition into adulthood.
30 GENERAL WELL-BEING Play is a natural state of childhood and is seen as a sheer joy. It allows them more freedom to be themselves, creating an enjoyable, fun environment with which they can truly express themselves. Creative play is like a spring that bubbles up from deep within a child. It is refreshing and enlivening and is a natural part of the make up of every happy, healthy child. Plenty of time for childhood play is one of the key factors leading to happiness in adults, and is actually recognised by the United Nations High Commission for Human Rights as a right of every child.
RISK TAKING
Risk taking has been positively linked to increased self-confidence and creative ability. Providing kids with risk taking opportunities is a vital component of outdoor play, and risky play opportunities introduce excitement and challenge for children to test their skills and try new activities. They gain mastery and a sense of accomplishment, thus further encouraging them to face new challenges. Children are more likely to develop responsible attitudes toward risk if they have experience dealing with risky situations. They can create and explore a world they can master, boosting their confidence and leaving them better prepared to meet lives challenges. Risk is everywhere and whether we like it or not, it is a part of development. Thoughtful risk epitomises the forward thrust of human growth and change.
Play is actually recognised by the United Nations High Commission for Human Rights as a right of every child.
5.
34 IN REGARDS TO TECHNOLOGY Set and stick to age appropriate boundaries No 7-year-old needs a cell phone! Make having one an age-appropriate milestone. School age and young pre-teens have been shown to develop hand eye coordination and decision making skills through video games. For older pre-teens a mobile phone fosters communication practice. Set and stick to time limits Make school nights television and video game free or enforce a limit for viewing time. Children over two should limit screen time to less than one to two hours a day. Set times, throughout the day where screens can be used and stick to them During class or family dinners mobile devices should be put face down. If they succeed in not touching the device for 15 minutes allow them a 1-2 minute tech break. Set aside sacred time Have a time such as one hour per day or one day per week in which both kids and their parents alike completely unplug.
Make bedrooms computer and television free zones Television and computers should only be in family areas were content can be monitored and usage controlled. Enforce that kids don’t use devices in their bedrooms. Relationships and Trust Engage in co-viewing and experience it with your child. Play video games on the occasion as a way of bonding with your child, and view their social media sites with them. Let them take control and teach you how to use them. If you need to check up on your kids social media sites, allow them 24 hours to clean up their profile before you take a look.
35 IN REGARDS TO PLAY Set Aside Family Time Have a set time or times each week labelled as quality family “play” time. Record the date, time and activity on a calendar that every family member can see so they know when and where it will take place. Studies showed that children whose dads played with them, were found to have greater levels of imagination and cognitive ability. They also showed that children whose mums played with them, experienced more secure attachment to their mums, and enjoyed more positive development. Encourage Outdoor Play The truth is, many parents are too lazy to encourage outdoor play. Set safe, hazard free environments where kids can play creatively, learn to assess risk, and face challenges vital for their development. Unwrap the Bubble-Wrap Kids will be kids and you can’t watch over them forever. Bumps and bruises heal but
Bumps and bruises heal but your relationship with your child lasts forever. your relationship with your child lasts forever. Wouldn’t you rather be inconvenienced for a short period of your life due to your child having an accident during play, than have them resent you for not allowing them to have the childhood they deserve? A Persil study of 9500 mothers over 10 countries showed that 1 in 2 of them believe childhood is over as we know it, and 77% were concerned that kids today are growing up too fast. Sure society has changed, and the world appears to be more dangerous than it was 20 years ago but loosen the grip and allow your child the right to be a child.
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“Childhood is a time for experimenting with the world, a time for play, dipping a toe into the outdoors, trying out different character traits to see which suits.”
1.
It Teaches Kids To Make Decisions For Themselves How will children learn to assess danger for themselves if you are constantly keeping them from creative play? Allow and encourage them to assess how risky something is for themselves, and guide them along to help them learn and make sensible judgements.
2.
It Helps Develop Confidence Making their own decisions, taking responsibility for their own actions and dealing with the consequences of bad decisions breeds confidence. They need to experiment in order to learn right from wrong.
3.
It Encourages Independence If you don’t let kids experience the world for themselves, it’s going to be terrifying later on when you remove those strings and let them out on their own.
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4.
The Fresh Air and Freedom To Grow I know its hard but you need to loosen the strings a little and let them out on their own every once in a while. They’ll eventually come back, generally when they’re hungry.
5.
It Helps Them Make and Live With Their Own Choices By taking away the power and ability to make choices for themselves, you are crushing their independence and they’ll only resent you. Stand back, let them make mistakes and deal with things themselves.
6.
It Shows you believe in them When your children feel you believe in them, the trust between you grows and they will be happier, more go getting people. They will never cease to love you unconditionally.
7.
It gives you, and them, more freedom Set boundaries, give them a curfew, and if they break that curfew put punishment in place. Offer them some of the joy and freedom you had as a child. It’s always hard to let go at first, but it gets easier and they will respect you for it.
8.
Giving responsibility, teaches responsibility Responsible kids become responsible adults who become responsible parents. The way you treat your kids shapes the way they treat theirs. Do you really want bubble-wrap grandchildren?
9.
It helps develop resilience A few bumps, bruises and grazes along the way only builds character. They heal. Let them discover their own resilience and see for themselves how far they can they can push it.
10.
It provides the space we all need to explore, discover, learn and grow Let them think they can have the moon on a stick and see where it takes them. They may settle for the moon or just the stick, but at least you’ve shown them the possibilities.
Your mother was, and will always be right. And hey, even with the bumps and bruises that eventually healed, your mother’s unconventional way of parenting worked out fine, and you turned out all right didn’t you?
end.
For more information visit www.artofplay.co.nz This booklet was prepared as a final year project for Design School at CPIT. I am a design student, not a qualified physician. This is a short guide only and any information in this booklet is based on research sought by myself from other sources. If you are seriously worried your child may have a problem with disconnecting from the online world please contact your local physician for advice.
Š Emily Kloogh, 2013