Building a Good Day
Spring 2022
Dr. Mary S. Lemmond Creative Aging, ENMU-Ruidoso Building a GOOD DAY. What a concept! Sometimes days seem to JUST HAPPEN: the electricity goes out, the internet doesn’t internet, the dog gets sick, it rains when there was 0% chance forecast – you know the drill. But not EVERY DAY is like that. In Women Rowing North: Navigating Life’s Currents and Flourishing As We Age, Dr. Mary Pipher suggests we can take days (or parts of days) and make them our own. Building a good day is more than taking control. To me it’s about making good choices about our emotions, thinking and behavior. Does that strike you as “doable”? In Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, Dr. Stephen Covey explained internal and external locus of control. Internal control is what Pipher clarified with her chapter on “building a good day.” External control includes all the little things that come at us which are not of our making or liking (toilets, internet, dog, rain, etc.). Covey indicates that when we grow our internal locus of control the external irritants maybe will not SHRINK but will be less stressful and problematic. We will not be at their mercy. Sounds good, doesn’t it? The question then becomes: How do we build a good day? Pipher offers some suggestions: Start with your first morning thoughts. Are you grumpy or more on the positive side? If grumpy, do a mental reset and think about the positive things you look forward to, and what you are grateful for – maybe that first cup of coffee??? Next, concentrate on what’s important. We can get so overwhelmed with “must do’s” that we don’t have time to enjoy. My friend Dr. Swasti Vohar of the University of New Mexico says we must learn to “savor.” I LOVE that. That first cup of coffee or tea: gulp, or sip and enjoy? The latter will start building a good day. Third, learn to pace yourself. This was the hardest for me. I’ve been so used to Go, GO, GOOO, but as Pipher says, sometimes our ambitions and ideas outpace our stamina. Is it possible to take a few minutes during the day to relax perhaps with a good book or magazine? How about a walk or some stretching to ease stress?
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