Editor: Imogen Carter living@ epigram.org.uk
Living
@e2Living
e2 likes to think of itself as a pretty big deal. It gets 30+ facebook messages on its birthday and knows the name of one of the bouncers at Lounge. It once got retweeted by Paul Daniels and it rarely gets picked last for team sports. But e2 pales in comparison to the big deals discussed in this week’s issue. From Eddie Redmayne to Cara Delevigne, these are the big deals who, unlike e2, probably have many leather bound books and appartments smelling of rich mahogany.
Style
e2 is brought to you by Living : Imogen Carter, Josephine Franks and Mona Tabbara will meet at 1.15 in the White Bear on Tuesday 5th of February Style : Lizi Woolgar and Alice Johnston will meet at Midday in the White Bear on Wednesday 6th of February Travel : Alicia Queiro and Alex Bradbrook will meet at 1.15 in the Refectory on Friday 8th of February
Deputy: Josephine Franks jfranks@ epigram.org.uk
Deputy: Mona Tabbara mtabbara@ epigram.org.uk
BIG DEAL BAKER
Deputy Editor Pat Baker has something to get off his chest
Were you to have walked into the Gala Casino, at 4am on the second Thursday of January, down on Bristol’s tranquil Habourside promenade, you perhaps might have seen a hunched, furtive figure, slumped in the corner of the quiet, bustling casino, all alone, throwing money at a roulette table with the concentration of a pro and the skill of the not much at all. Yep, there you have it. I am addicted to gambling and I don’t apologize for it. Although that night was not one of great success, I have actually made a profit from the casino this year. I am about £120 pounds up on the deal. Oh, how skilled of you, I hear you cry! Poker? Blackjack? Where’s your real expertise, then? Roulette. Red or black every time. No skill, just guessing and a degree of luck has carried me through to this, my current state of extraordinary riches. As a gambling addict, I have often been met with accusations of weakness, foolishness and shortsightedness; they say I am blinded by a lie, a lie which will soon give way to financially crippling effect. ‘What if you lose? What if you put £100 down on red (always red, when you’re playing with big sums – trust me) and you lose and that’s that?’ My eyes sparkle, I smile: ‘Yes, but what if I WIN?’ It is this kind of courage that is essential to every successful gambling addict; I am a risk-taker and I make no apologies for that.
“No skill, just guessing and a degree of luck has carried me through to this, my current state of extraordinary riches”
your first colour beforehand. You might have noticed an excessive number of Bristol students sporting red trousers, or an equally telling number of black crows that day; these are the signs we must interpret if we are to achieve glory. Another thing, don’t go with a friend. Otherwise, they might start offering you lines like ‘let’s quit while we’re ahead’; this sentiment is the enemy of the gambling addict and is totally antithetical to gamblingrelated glory. Go on your own. Quit when you know to quit, continue when you know to continue. That’s my way. My next project is highly exciting and I, of course, shall welcome any donations. I shall spend the first few months of the summer, earning around £4000 pounds. I shall then place all of this money on the roulette table, on either red or black. If I win, I go to America with £8000 in my back pocket and the world is my oyster. If I lose, I earn the money back, and bet again, in an endless cycle which will result in my ascension to the high altar of gambling glory, an apotheosis of addictedness, you might say. So, I hope to see a great deal of you down at the casino in the near future. What better way to improve oneself morally, emotionally and financially. I’ll leave you with an old adage: ‘I’ve been poor and I’ve been rich, and rich is better.’
A further word of advice for anyone hell bent on hitting Gala. Choose
with e2 editor : Ant Adeane e2 online editor: Nicola Reid Illustrators: Alex Norris Cover photo: Dean Honeytana
Travel
www.e2blog.tumblr.com
Valentine’s day is on the horizon, and if you are stuck for ideas on how to treat your loved one while keeping your bank balance in the positives, Living have trawled the web so you don’t have to, in search of the greatest deals to get you out of the cold and into your sweetheart’s good books. Simply Live Professional Sushi Maker O n e Living Social are offering a professional sushi Direction Singing Bears maker for an absolute steal of £9! ‘Pull the You may not be able to match up to Harry or Zain’s sexual handle, and voila! a perfectly round roll!’ it magnetism, but you can do the next best thing and buy your promises. loved one a One Direction Bear! They even Falconry Experience perform a rendition of ‘What Makes You Beautiful’. Snap Groupon are providing a date you will never these snuggle muffins up quickly, £19.99 for one and £69.99 forget. £19 for 2.5 hours and £33 for a full for the full set. day, with one participant and one observer.
Crème Brûlée Making Gift Set with Mini Blowtorch Only £24, a fabulous 47% off! Two Free Condoms Student Beans are reminding us that safety always comes first, and are giving away two free rubbers courtesy of britishcondoms,co.uk. Free Chlamydia Test If you have some trouble with your condoms, Student Beans are also offering a free chlamydia test to keep you ticking over. And if you have not got anyone to spend this special day with, have a go at Go Karting for One! Living Social will treat you to a 30 lap Go Karting experience for one for £15.
HEART BREAKER OR DEAL BREAKER?
04.02.13 Game of Thrones and BBC weather warned us it was coming but I was still surprised when winter hit Bristol the other week and transformed our university town into the Christmas scenes of Harry Potter. I half expected Hedwig to descend from the roof of the Wills building to inform us of the University closure but I received an email instead.
flickr x-ray delta
BORDERLINE NEWS
IMOGEN PALMER
the people on Brandon Hill but boy, did I slide some distance of that distance on that ol’ tray. If only every day were snow day! In other news… Students live in Igloo to raise money for a charity. One participant said ‘It’s almost as cold as our house.’
And what a day! In all my almost three years of Bristol I have never seen everyone –students and locals alike - out in the streets and tobogganing. For some reason, typical British awkwardness thaws away on snow day and you’re allowed to make snowmen with strangers and swear at cheeky snow-balling kids in the street before destroying them in your own strategic, take-noprisoners retaliation.
“I managed to find time to draw an interpretation of Natasha Bedingfield in the snow and hit the slopes with a tray we found”
Despite multiple deadlines and exams approaching, my friends and I managed to find time to draw an interpretation of Natasha Bedingfield in the snow (she is our pocket full of sunshine) and hit the slopes with a tray we found. Sure, we didn’t quite match the snowboarding skills demonstrated by some of
New idiom hits supermarket shoppers: ‘I’m so hungry I could eat a Tesco burger.’ Justin Bieber’s mother helps to launch an anti-abortion video. She was like ‘Baby, baby, baby oooh, I thought you’d always be mine.’ And now you will be.
GETTING TRASHED AT GLASTO Bum deal: Kate Samuelson had litter-ally such a messy weekend I was determined to go to Glastonbury 2011. I remember waking up early on the morning that tickets were first released and refreshing and refreshing and refreshing the page. Obviously, they all sold out in just a couple of minutes; I stood no chance against the waves of hippies who had partied at Glastonbury since 1974 and had perfected using the highly stressful ticket-buying system over the past 37 years. However, I did not give up on my dream of going to the festival. I did some research on alternative ways to go to Glasto and found something that looked perfect: joining the Glastonbury recycling team. For a free ticket, all I would have to do was complete four six-hour shifts. It sounded pretty simple so I signed myself and a friend up, without really considering what these shifts would consist of... I drove to the festival with my friend Georgia. We joked the whole way there about how funny recycling was going to be and how simple we thought it would be to just do a couple of hours a day and then sneak off to watch Bombay Bicycle Club or Wu-Tang Clan. We were in high spirits by the time we arrived, set up our tent in record time and went to the recycling hut to meet our team leader. This was when it all began to go downhill. John, whose red eyes still haunt me to this day, greeted us with three recycling bags: white for paper or cardboard, green for plastic and black for ‘everything else’. We were also given some gloves and a bright pink Glastonbury recycling team poncho. Then the rules were explained to us: we had to meet at 5.50am every morning; our shifts would end at 12pm; we weren’t going to have any breaks in this time; we had to take a register every half an hour to ensure we hadn’t sneaked off; we would only get our £200 deposit back if we completed every shift fully; we had to wear the poncho at all times. The last rule was possibly the worst - I can still hear the taunts of drunken and/or high festival goers shouting abuse and throwing cans of beer at the ‘recycling freaks’ at 6am as they trundled home from the Shangri-la party arena. It was more than degrading work. We woke up as people went to sleep and trudged around thanklessly picking up all the shit they had dropped during the day. The first couple of hours of the shift, despite fighting exhaustion, were the best, as there were fewer people about. By 10am however, I was ready to kill John, the rest of my ‘team’ including Georgia and any happy- go-lucky festival goer we happened to pass. My back ached (bending over every minute for six hours exposed me to pain in muscles I never knew I had), I was sunburnt and I stank of rubbish. Even worse, I knew that every day my back was going to hurt even more, my sunburn worsen and the smell increase. And there was nothing I could do about it.
By the third day I was ready to give up and go home - but Georgia was having none of it. ‘We have already completed half our shifts’, she reasoned with me, ‘and if we leave now, it will all be for nothing’. She had a point, and we resolved to make the most of the last day and a half of the festival. We fought the exhaustion we felt as our shifts ended at 12, and explored the absolutely colossal festival (fun fact: it’s the size of the city of Bath), watching Mumford and Sons, Morrissey and Laura Marling whilst drinking away the pain of the morning with free Brothers Cider.
Would I say that recycling was worth it for the free ticket? Probably not; nothing sucks the fun out of something more than three different coloured recycling bags. However, getting to see my lifetime hero Beyonce was a moment that will stick with me forever... even though it is slightly tainted by a rather overpowering smell of rubbish.
Editor: Imogen Carter living@ epigram.org.uk
@e2Living
Style
Living
The Only Way is Bristol I’ve just spent a good hour sticking up a bundle of slightly too bright, Instagramesque photographs onto the ceiling of my arty bedroom (dark attic room, orange feature wall, enough said). I want to say that the reason for this prolonged blutacking is because I enjoy looking at the fond memories of me and my friends frolicking in a haze of social nirvana, but to be completely honest, there is definitely a part of me that relishes the idea of other people seeing the prints of my amah-zing social life. It is a way of proving to people that I have lots of friends and am definitely the sort of person they want to hang out with. I am kind of a Big Deal. I am cool but not try-hard; hence the photos are from a disposable camera, taken at awkward angles and often with the ‘I-was-too-busydrunkenly-socialising-to-take-the-photoproperly’ smudge of a finger over the lens. So you’ve turned your abode into something resembling a Lomography dark room (if you haven’t had the foresight to invest in a disposable camera then the offcolour hue of home-printed photographs is perfect). The next step is to make your Facebook account fit for the big (wo)man on campus that you are. Make sure there are at least 2,000 tagged photographs of yourself and ‘like’ a lot of things, even if what your friends are saying is actually quite sad/ angry/ upset (note that in these circumstances an accompanying ‘DISLIKE’ comment is quite effective). This will ensure lots of likes in return. Spread the like. Or do as my housemate does and like your own comments a n d
statuses; either way, nothing screams top dog more than a myriad of likes. A quick aside on writing statuses: #hashtags are a definite yes (the more the merrier); song lyrics, work complaints, relationship woes are a definite no-no. Once you’ve mastered the art of Facebook fashion, its time to turn your attention to your actual image. The appropriate attire is generally course-dependent, but as an arts student myself I feel it necessary to underline the importance of style as you are strutting your stuff around Woodland Road. Oversized is always good, though never on the bottom; skin-tight jeans, leggings or teeny weeny shorts are the staple accompaniment to your dead granddad’s tea-stained jumper (better known as ‘vintage’ for the BNOCs among us). Personal image however is not just about looks. It is fair to say that if you’re blessed in the looks department you’ll ascend the social ladder notably faster than the rest of us. We mere plain folks have to rely on witty comments otherwise known as banter, and hilarious acts of sheer cray-cray behaviour, justified with a ‘#YOLO #UNAY’. Such feats include stealing road signs, varying levels of public nudity, and minor acts of non-committal vandalism (think cone-theft and window smashing). All of this must be documented by a fellow BNOC and then broadcast on ‘Bristol Uni Confessions’ or ‘UniLAD’. Follow these simple steps and you’ll soon be the name on everyone’s lips. Learning how to attract attention whilst simultaneously playing it down takes a lot of practise and dedication. You might not get it right first time, which will definitely create some awkward situations, but power on through and even UniLAD will be coming to you for hints and tips.
Deputy: Josephine Franks jfranks@ epigram.org.uk
Deputy: Mona Tabbara mtabbara@ epigram.org.uk
GROWERS NOT SHOW-ERS Pippa Shawley takes us through the best accidental inventions that changed the world Cornflakes
Absent-mindedness is a common theme with accidental inventions. Will Keith Kellogg was one day dreamer whose dawdling led to revolutionising our breakfast tables. Put in charge of baking bread one day, Kellogg left a bit of boiled wheat sitting around for several hours. When he mixed the wheat into dough, he found it created a flaky substance. He decided to go ahead and bake it anyway. The flaky snack went down a treat and after some experimenting, Kellogg switched the main ingredient from wheat to corn, creating the cereal we love today.
Ice lollies
In 1905, an 11 year old boy in San Francisco decided to make a fruit-flavoured soda out of powder and water. He forgot about the mixture and left it outside overnight. That night was a cold one, and when the boy returned the next morning, he found his drink had frozen with the stirring stick still in it. He loved it, decided it was delicious and promptly forgot all about it. 17 years later, Frank Epperson, now a grown man, served his frozen lollipops at a ball where they were snapped up. In 1923, Epperson applied for a patent and ‘popsicles’ –named by his children- were born.
Chocolate chip cookies
In 1930 inn-keeper Ruth Graves Wakefield planned to make chocolate biscuits for her guests. Realising that she had run out of baker’s chocolate, she improvised and broke Nestlé’s semisweet chocolate into her mixture expecting it to melt. The chocolate fragments didn’t melt, but Wakefield’s guests loved the cookies. When Nestle heard about the success of Wakefield’s recipe, they agreed to give her with a lifetime’s supply of chocolate in return for her recipe being printed on every bar of Nestlé’s semisweet chocolate.
Viagra
Side effects are usually viewed as inconvenient at best, and at worst, deadly. Researchers testing the drug on those suffering from high blood pressure and heart complaints, they were disappointed to find that it wasn’t as effective as they had predicted. They noticed, however, that multiple patients had reported that the treatment had led to erections and so the drug company, Pfizer, decided t o remarket the drug. The product proved a great success with sales peaking at $1934 million in 2008.
Rosie Quigley
Travel
Diary of a Notorious B.I.G. (Deal) GOOD MORNING and a fabulous morning it is as I awaken for yet another day of being me. Descending from my haven of scented candle tranquillity by day and lash pad extraordinaire a la night, it’s breakfast time. Only 3 bagels this morning for me – watching the fig – and don’t want to feel like I spent 10 mins on the cross trainer yesterday for nothing!! Picked out my abso fav pair of blazers this morning, but couldn’t decide between my BOY London and BS8 vintage tshirts so just opted for my JW gilet last min, was closest to hand, and put some hoops in to give it le edge. Woodland Road pretty rammo this morning. Always find it so awkward when everyone’s looking at me, but just gotta power through; casual glance both ways – what cars? oh look my phone’s ringing! swish of le hoops, and I’m in. Fear not young pagans of the English Literal world, for I, le moi, chieftan of the pack, est ariveé. 13 mins late (perf amount of time for brewing the hysteria of ‘omfg is she gonna come?!?!?!’ in turn setting up for the heartwarming sighs of relief at my arrival) stroll in, siddown and with a flamboyant yet perfectly understated flick of the Longchamp she’s ready for the leccy. Today must be a particularly stressful day for the troops, so focused no one even complimented my new
Michael Kors watch which absolutely no one else got for Christmas (will Instagram a pic for you later.) Crack out the iPad as it’s a Tuesday - adhering to the pressing timetable of Macbook Wednesdays, iPhone Thursdays and don’t give a shit about making notes Fridays – and proceed with the loveable ahhh what’s she like! I’m-toohip-to-do-any-of-your-travaille-Mr-Lecturer, for which I am known and loved. Apres-sem, went to the gym. Turns out I can’t actually exercise for anything longer than 7 minutes so just decided to stretch a bit next to the weights, channelling my best Victoria’s Secret angel with a post-jog sheen (was actually a bit more on the crimson and wheezing side but I masked it well). Committed to my performance for a good twenty five mins (I didn’t buy a four year membership in Freshers’ to just leave after five) and could see the other girls staring, the boys trying their hardest not to, and one fellow gymgoer was so overwhelmed he had to move away from me. Mission accomplie. Whack out a rollie I asked my flatmate to make for me this morning for the stroll home – equally as important to nail as the morning Woodland Waltz – swap my blazers for the air maxs to demonstrate the diversity of my wardrobe aaaaaand off I go. Not such a whiz at the actual
smoking lark, actually tending more to resemble myself as I dismount the treadmill than an avid fumeur, but who actually smokes cigarettes anymore? Going to Motion tonight - abso cannot wait. Not sure what I’m going to wear yet; already exhausted the footwear repertoire for today but will probs just squeeze another wear out of my American Apparel disco pants… again. Really wish there were more people like me around here, no one appreciates my obscure style iconicity or intrepid DJing forays (I dabble in electroreggae-dubstep), revolutionizing the future of music and fashion as we know it. I shall have to make my own way through this life; a beacon of hope, the model Bristolian Studento, with the hopes and dreams o f my devoted followers upon my shoulders, paving the way for future generations of absolutely freaking awesome. P.S. Note to self: take more drugs, wear bigger hoops, carry on being le fabulous moi.
Isobel Allen
04.02.13
BIG DEAL TO NO DEAL ROOM 101 #7: MIRANDA I have tried to see the funny side – a large woman falling over, a large woman with her knickers tucked into her skirt, a large woman unlucky with men – but I cannot see the big deal in a comedy routine that appears to lack any sort of originality or ingenuity. While slapstick has its place, Fawlty Towers being a truly well deserved national treasure, the whole premise of a show’s value cannot be built upon one sort of benign humour alone. Essentially, it appears that Miranda has watched a few episodes of You’ve Been Framed and YouTubed ‘people falling over’ and turned it into a comedy routine. If I were to go all Germaine Greer, Miranda could be classed as being as demeaning to women as a Page 3 model. For Miranda is a modern sort of damsel in distress. She may be big and clumsy, not the dainty and beautiful stuff of fairy tale princesses, but she is still a woman trapped by her gender. We are constantly made aware that she is a social outcast because she is tall and, shock horror, she is a woman. She disappoints her mother because she cannot find a husband. She is socially inept because she is self conscious about her size. Her life is a series of unfortunate events. And through it all, we are constantly reminded that she is funny because she is big. However, would the show ever work if she was a man? Is being a big woman such a huge character flaw that you can create a whole show about it? The answer is no, because tall men are not portrayed as peculiar in the same way that tall women are.
“Miranda is irritating, not loveable” I feel very much alone in this point of view, for Miranda appears to be going from strength to strength. She was deemed such a big deal by the BBC that the second series of her show has been moved from BBC Two to BBC One. She has hit the big time. She has received a BAFTA nomination and won Best TV Comedy Actress at the British Comedy Awards. The opening episode of the third series was one of the most watched shows over the Christmas period, attracting over 11.5 million viewers. Is it that people are excited about Miranda, or is it just the excitement of having a female-led comedy show on the BBC again following the disappearance of French and Saunders? Is Miranda simply doing well because there are not enough female-led comedy shows being commissioned? Is there really nothing better out there? Miranda is irritating, not loveable. The having-a-chatwith-the-camera asides are cringe-worthy, not endearing. The dialogue is predictable and poorly written. The show is an example of huge hype overtaking p e o p l e ’ s sense. If you want to watch s o m e o n e fall over, there are some great videos on YouTube of people dancing on tables that promptly collapse. They take approximately t w o minutes to watch and will give you a greater concentration of laughter than the mere smile that half an hour of Miranda’s painful quips will very occasionally provoke from you.
Stephanie Wassell
Matilda aka Mara Wilson Forget Dakota Fanning, the child star most cherished in our hearts has to be Mara Wilson. Matilda, Mrs. Doubtfire and Miracle on 34th Street catapulted her into the limelight throughout the nineties. She has since been wiped off the radar, her only recent acting credit being a brief appearance in web series Missed Connection. Wilson has announced she has no desire to return to film, as she expressed in the 2008 one woman play she wrote and performed in entitled Weren’t You That Girl.
Kel from Kenan and Kel ‘Who loves orange soda? Kel loves orange soda!’ Or should it be Kel loved orange soda? Rumours have circulated for years about the nineties Nickelodeon icon’s death. Epigram would like to confirm that Kel is alive. Since the demise of the Kenan and Kel duo, Kel has mainly done cartoon voice-over work. He auditioned for Saturday Night Live in 2003 but lost out on the job to his old ‘buddy’ Kenan. Safe to say a Kenan and Kel Show reunion
Eamon and Frankee The Ross and Rachel of the early noughties R’N’B world, Eamon became a global phenomenon in 2003 with his single ‘Fuck it (I don’t want you back)’. The song earned him a Guinness World Record for the most expletives in a number one single. In response, his supposed girlfriend Frankee released ‘F.U.R.B’, and also bagged herself a number one single. I t has since emerged that Eamon and Frankee were never in fact an item. Eamon is still recording, while Frankee was dropped from her record label after her 2006 single ‘Watch Me’ failed to make the charts.
Hulk Hogan Wrestler Hulk Hogan had it all: WWF champion, an acting career – including credits in classics Rocky III and Muppets in Space – and a loving family, as evident on his reality TV show Hogan Knows Best. In recent years things have gone downhill: he turns down the chance to market the Lean Mean Grilling Machine which makes George Foreman $150 million, admits to steroid use, his wife files for divorce and promptly starts dating her teenage pool boy leading Hogan to remark ‘I totally understand OJ, I get it’ and begins dating a younger lady himself who incidentally looks identical to his daughter. In April 2012 he had a Kim Kardashian moment after he was featured in a sex tape leaked online.
Neil Buchanan Another nineties star who had to deny his own death was Art Attack presenter Neil Buchanan. The man who could make loo rolls cool and create a functioning spaceship out of just a coat hanger and a Pringles tube is still alive and focusing on a music career. Buchanan sings in a band called Marseille which are part of the New Wave of British Heavy Metal scene. They have provided backing vocals for Des’ree. After a hiatus the band reformed in 2009. Samantha Mumba Early noughties pop sensation Samantha Mumba got off to a great start. Her first single ‘Gotta Tell You’ reached number one in the Irish charts, number two in the UK and number four in America. Her album stayed in the charts for six months and has sold over 4 million copies worldwide. She even collaborated with Bob Marley’s son Damien on her single ‘I’m Right Here’. The success did not last, and after the first single from her second album flopped she was dropped by her record label. Mumba suffered further humiliation by taking part in Channel 4 documentary Get Your Act Together with Harvey Goldsmith that showed her attempting, and struggling, to revive her music career. Mumba was left with no option but to take part in the Margate of celeb reality TV, Dancing on Ice. She lasted three weeks.
Leslie Grantham He became a soap legend through his portrayal of the infamous Dirty Den in Eastenders. Things have got a little bit too dirty for Leslie, as his off-screen life appears to be a s controversial as his on-screen character. I n 1966 he attempted to rob a German taxi driver, resulting in the shooting of the driver and Grantham serving a ten year prison sentence. Not one to learn to keep a low profile, in 2004 he made the headlines again when he was involved in an online sex scandal. He exposed himself on a web cam while masturbating and sucking his fingers in his dressing room to an undercover reporter known as ‘Halo Polisher’. Grantham was reportedly dressed as Captain Hook, revealed his sexual fantasies about animals and insulted his fellow Eastenders stars and the script. He is now appearing in pantomimes. Rik Waller Cuddly Rik Waller wowed us all back on the first series of Pop Idol in 2002. Things looked good as he enjoyed a top ten hit following the show with a cover of Dolly Parton’s ‘I Will Always Love You’. Unfortunately, it appears that we did not always love Rik. He was dropped by EMI, and after a stint on Celebrity Fit Club in which he was thrown off for binge eating, formed his own band ‘Rik Waller’s Unfinished Business’. Their tour was reportedly cancelled after his Devon show sold only 2 tickets. Since marrying a pagan, Waller has decided that singing is not his forte. His most recent public appearance was in the identity parade on Never Mind the Buzzcocks in 2007.
Mona Tabbara
Living
@e2Living
F O L A E D ING G I B YTH A E ER K A EV M O LLY T A W R O E H LIT Last year, the Daily Mail website beat the New York Times as the world’s most popular news website, to the sound of a million Guardian readers’ souls dying. In a noble act of journalistic self-sacrifice on the behalf of the readers of this fine paper, I’ve undertaken some wholly academic and very scientific research into why the Daily Fail is enjoying such a soar in popularity. I invite you to join me as I enter a Sidebar-of-Shamespiral.
Like most news websites, its sidebar and click-through format means that when you sneakily click onto it while the kettle’s boiling, to scan one quick article before you start that essay you’ve been procrastinating or just to laugh at some tits (Cameron and Milliband?), you tend to stay there longer than you’d intended. It’s a lot like being hit on the head with a brick:―you start scrolling and come to your senses three days later, having suffered a giant rage haemorrhage, realising that you’ve clicked through the entire of Jan Moir’s archive and are now bleeding from your eyeballs.
Tearful Anne Hathaway scoops ‘Best Supporting Actress’ ‘You will not get a flawless tan in that! TOWIE’s Lucy Mecklenburgh wears bizarre Borat style black monokini’
2. Bad Puns [Ed: Please refer to Living’s headline of previous issue: ‘You go Uruguay and I’ll go mine’...] I love a good, and not-so-good pun as much as the next person, but the Mail has so much pun as it roots out the big story that other papers have neglected: ‘Keeping abreast of the winners: Anne Hathaway’s husband Adam Shulman makes a boob as his wife wins Best Supporting Actress’- Anne Hathaway seems to be getting a lot of column inches here. Just so this doesn’t keep anyone awake at night wondering what it’s about, Anne Hathaway’s husband seems to be slightly touching her breast as he hugs her after winning an award. FILTHY. ‘Panda-monium! Suri Cruise finds a novel way of keeping warm in a bear-y cute hat after brunch with Katie Holmes’. That’s right people, a four-year-old in a hat looks like a bear, you read it here first. I’m left with just one question― since when do toddlers have brunch?
Through my, once again, entirely scientific and not at all reductive and/or made-up research, I have put the Mail’s success down to three main things that allows it to make such engaging stories from things that other (I won’t say ‘proper’) newspapers might pass by. This is by no means an exhaustive list, but a snapshot of a few of the things that keep us clicking through its website like a patient with a morphine button.
Style
The Daily Mail is as slutty with its punctuation as a Fresher in a onesie after one too many rounds of Ring of Fire. Every sidebar headline is peppered with so many exclamation and question marks that they ring in your head like a tiny Cilla Black shrieking into an auto-tune mic: ‘ “It’s going to be awful...my ass will get so big!” Kim Kardashian stuffs cushion up her top to simulate being heavily pregnant.’ ‘Can she make it third time lucky at the Oscars?
It SHOULD TERRIFY US ALL. Got it?
Rachel Schraer your friends can prelash and wreck furniture without too many complaints from the neighbours. Make sure you have no regrets on nights out. Target Bunker’s ‘Pull Cam’ with as many potential partners as possible, dare to sleep with the fresher in your old room from halls, and why not hang out at Donervans to pick up someone whether you’ve been out or not!
Travel
In terms of marketing yourself, it is vital that you do so and on as many networks as possible. Starting with Burst Radio, you really ought to have a regular slot so that everyone can familiarise themselves with
PUT YOURSELF ON THE MAP
Alcohol fuels how many friends you make, so be sure to have a drink in your hand constantly, either to give to the fresher you’re hoping to take home or your spontaneous new Lounge friends. Scoring a Black Card makes this easier as your bank account doesn’t feel the pinch as much from being out every night – and you can skip the queue with a plus one. Ideally Daddy will buy you a terraced house in Clifton where you and
Because none of us have enough to worry about, what with probably never being able to get a job in this economic climate, the whole world drowning due to global warming―(but not before I’ve tobogganed down Park Street)―and American politicians with names suspiciously like evil wizards (I’m looking at you Newt Gingrich) trying to get into our wombs, the Mail is keeping you on red alert to what you should be having an anxiety attack over next: ‘Instagram and Facebook spark hacking fears with security blitz demanding users send in a copy of their “Government ID”. If we can’t trust social networking sites not to scam us, who can we trust? Time to activate the panic room. And my favourite, the fairly unequivocal: ‘This flood of porn should terrify us all’
1. Punctuation
BNOC. Forget a BsC or a PhD, BNOC has become the most coveted title to graduate from Bristol with. Whether you gain this honour through making outlandish and discriminatory statements as head of a society, or if you’re the ‘one to know’ as a perennial club promoter/supplier-of-tickets, you’re in there. Working the club scene is vital, as it’s the best way of coming into contact with students of all ages. It is essential to join a sports club with a strong drinking culture as well.
3. Inciting Fear
your voice and your eclectic taste in music. Find a reason for UBTV to interview you as well, whether while posing in a club or for supporting a good cause, as people do watch their videos. Another way of circulating your name in Bristol for a supposedly valid reason is to canvas for a position at the Union. Not only does this give you an excuse to bag the flyering spot on the corner of Woodland Road, it also means that everyone who votes will actually see your name written down. Tweet regularly, gaining hundreds of followers with your wit and banter. Post a public photo on Facebook with a dare you’ll fulfill if you reach over 200,000 likes, the more nudity the better. Or simply post a video on YouTube of you pouring the most expensive drink/drug you can find on yourself. Being a model or dancer in FUZE or CLIC is the closest you’ll become to walking the red carpet in Bristol, so make sure you hit the
gym hard and get in with the committees early. Becoming a Big Deal in Bristol is all about image. Instagram your photos so they draw the maximum number of likes and give stalkers something to look at. No one is interested in the food you just ate – they want to see your gorgeous face. The place to see and be seen is the ASS library so frequent it regularly whether you’re an Arts and Social Sciences student or not. People will respect your work ethic, even if the hours you put in are just spent watching football. In your spare time hang out at any of the cafes in the vicinity or the gym. Ideally a poll would be started about you on “Spotted: Bristol Pulse Uni Gym”. Be sure to buy clothes that give people a reason to strike up conversation too; try Gloucester Road for a whole host of bright, garish and unconventional attire if the ones from your Gap Year are looking outdated. The main thing is to make a name for yourself. Find time to do everything, and live by the mantra: “Work hard. Play hard. Gym hard.” That’s the culture at Bristol and the way you are sure to meet anyone and everyone.
Lara
Kottsieper
University of Bristol Students’ Union
Think about what you want. Make it happen at your meeting.
Thursday 7 February, 2-5pm The Great Hall, Wills Memorial Building Motions submitted by students will be debated and voted on at the Annual Members’ Meeting: use your student voice to improve your experience at Bristol. ubu.org.uk/amm
UBU NEWS
Issue 7 04.02.2013
ubu.org.uk
Coming soon: Volunteering & RAG weeks Student Volunteering Week, from 11 February, is a nationwide celebration of student volunteering that showcases the positive difference that students make on campus and in their local, national and international communities. Vice President Community Alice Peck, UBU Volunteering and Bristol Hub have been busy planning a series of events throughout the week including free pancakes, one-off opportunities, speed-dating, training and an Ethical Careers Fair.
DATE: Thursday 7 Feb TIME: 2-5pm PLACE: Wills Memorial Building Great Hall The Annual Members’ Meeting is your chance to have your say about the Students’ Union’s policies and the actions of the HOHFWHG RIÀFHU WHDP Any student can submit a motion and then debate and vote on motions at the meeting. Visit ubu.org.uk/AMM to read the full text of the motions that will be discussed at the meeting.
On Tuesday 29 January, the agenda was announced for the 2013 Annual Members’ Meeting. The agenda presents the overall order of the meeting, including (OHFWHG 2IÀFHU UHSRUWV WKH DQQXDO DSSURYDO RI 8%8¡V DIÀOLDWLRQV D OLVW of motions from 2010 that are due to lapse and also a list of motions that have been submitted by students. The order that the motions will be discussed will be decided by a priority ballot, open to all students at ubu.org.uk/amm until 4pm Monday 4 February. Student-submitted motions address issues from incorporating Junior Common Rooms (JCRs) into the Students’ Union to the addition of a 3G Astroturf at
Coombe Dingle. Students are also interested in electing a PostJUDG 3DUW WLPH 2IĂ€FHU LQFUHDVLQJ the safety of precinct roads and banning arms companies at UBU events. See the full list of motions at ubu.org.uk/amm. If you are interested in reintroducing a lapsing policy (also listed online), please contact ubudemocracy@bristol.a.c.uk A booklet containing general information and a motion list will be available at the AMM while the full text of the motions will be presented on a large screen. If you would like to request a full-text booklet, or have any other questions, please contact ubudemocracy@bristol.ac.uk.
The Ethical Careers Fair is a collaboration between UBU, Bristol Hub and the University Careers Service where organisations and charities in the third sector advertise jobs, graduate schemes and paid internships. The evening will involve a panel debate and a chance to network with the stall holders. Find out more at ubu.org.uk/volunteering. According to Alice Peck, “Being a student at the University of Bristol is not just about studying, but about getting involved with the diverse, exciting city. UBU runs amazing volunteering projects in the local community, and Volunteering Week celebrates the students involved as well as encourages others to sign up.â€? Raising and Giving (RAG) week, from 16 February, aims to raise ÂŁ5,000 for local organisations. The week begins with a traditional procession opened by the Lord Mayor leading from the Downs towards Park Street where a community fun day will be held at Folk House. On 19 February, RAG will hold an overnight Soccathon drawing teams from across the University. 6LJQ XS HDUO\ DV LW Ă€OOV XS TXLFNO\ Visit ubu.org.uk/fundraising for more information about events.
UBU News | Issue 7 | 04.02.2013
1
Build a better Bristol: How Win for geography VWXGHQWV IUHH ÀHOG WULS would you spend £20,000? The Students’ Union was contacted last week by a second year Geography student after being told that they needed to pay £200 for D FRPSXOVRU\ ÀHOG WULS 7KH (OHFWHG 2IÀFHUV LPPHGLDWHO\ FRQWDFWHG the Deputy Vice-Chancellor to discuss how the Union and University could work together to avoid such costs.
As a result, the University agreed to cover the entire cost of the trip offering refunds to any student who had already paid. Want something else changed within the University? Make sure you attend the Annual Members’ Meeting on Thursday 7 February. #IAMMGOING
Last summer UBU commissioned 4 students to research postgrad life at Bristol. Find out what they learned at a workshop on 11 February from 12-4pm in LT2 (behind 11 Woodland Road). The event includes opportunities for questions, an open discussion about how to enhance the postgrad experience and a free lunch. Details at ubu. org.uk/justask/pgresearch and RSVP to ubu-postgrads@bristol.ac.uk.
LGBT+ History Month events throughout February The LGBT+ Society, in conjunction with Amnesty International Society, Feminist Society and the Students’ Union, presents LGBT+ History Month in February 2013. LGBT+ History Month aims to raise student body awareness of LGBT+ issues. In particular, the campaign will focus on marriage equality and the government’s plans to legalise same-sex civil marriage. On 5th February 2013, parliament will take a vote on same-sex marriage. Find out how you can show your support at ubu.org.uk/ voice/lgbtplus-month.You can also visit Facebook.com/BristolMarriaJH(TXDOLW\ IRU PRUH LQIRUPDWLRQ (YHQWV FHOHEUDWLQJ /*%7 KLVWRU\ and raising awareness of LGBT+
LVVXHV LQFOXGH D Ă€OP VFUHHQLQJ RI (A)sexual, a discussion group about LGBT+ and Feminism, a Kiss-In IRU 0DUULDJH (TXDOLW\ D VHVVLRQ RQ “How to be a straight ally?â€? and a panel discussion about faith and sexuality. Visit lgbtplusbristol.org.uk/historymonth for more information and event dates and locations. There will also be a poster exhiELWLRQ RQ WKH JURXQG Ă RRU RI WKH Arts & Social Sciences Library with information about LGBT+-relatHG WHUPV DQG SURĂ€OHV RI IDPRXV Ă€JXUHV LQ /*%7 KLVWRU\ If you have any questions or suggestions, please feel free to contact the LGBT+ Society at ubu-lgbtplus@bristol.ac.uk. Twitter: #uoblgbt
The University of Bristol Students’ Union and Alumni Relations have teamed up to give students the opportunity to decide how to spend £20,000 of alumni donations. The Build a Better Bristol campaign will launch on 15 February to give students a chance to submit an idea for a project that they think would make an impact on the University of Bristol or an aspect of University life. Any student can submit an idea and the aim is to choose a project that will have a big impact on the student community whilst staying within the £20,000 budget. Clubs and societies can also submit ideas providing there is one person as the main point of contact.
Student can submit their ideas until midnight on 21 February. The criteria for submissions and the application form can be found at ubu.org.uk/betterbristol. Paper copies of the form will be also be available at UBU events. ,Q $SULO ÀQDO \HDU VWXGHQWV ZLOO vote on a shortlist of projects and decide which one(s) will be chosen and put into action. The winning project will effect change in the University, so if you would like to make an impact, take this chance to have your say and Build a Better Bristol. If you have any questions or want any feedback, get in touch with Daniela Kistulincova at dk0105@my.bristol.ac.uk.
UBU President Paul Charlton said: “Build a Better Bristol is a fantastic initiative.With the money generously donated by alumni, students have the opportunity to change University life in ways that wouldhave been previously impossible. Best of all, it is students and students alone who decide how the ÂŁ20,000 is spent.â€?
Discover Islam Week: Dispelling Myths Bristol University Islamic Society presents Discover Islam Week, 11-16 February 2013. According to the Islamic Society, “We intend to clarify controversies that are associated with Muslims, portray the reality of Muslim culture that surrounds peace, FRPPXQDO EHQHĂ€W DQG SUDFWLFDO EHQHĂ€W (DFK \HDU ZH RUJDQLVH D series of events consisting of an exquisite exhibition, several talks on contemporary topics, public
forums, interactive activities and stalls.� This year the week will focus on dispelling myths about Islamic rules and regulations and looking at the position of women in Islam in opSRVLWLRQ WR PRGHUQ REMHFWLÀFDWLRQ For more information visit Facebook.com/brisoc or brisoc.com.
TOTAL: ÂŁ23,800.00 UBU News | Issue 7 | 04.02.2013
2
(OHFWLRQV DUH FRPLQJ WKH FXUUHQW RIĂ€FHUV tell you why their jobs are brilliant:
EDUCATION Tom Flynn
WELFARE & EQUALITY Alessandra Berti
PRESIDENT Paul Charlton
COMMUNITY Alice Peck
SPORT & HEALTH Hannah Pollak
ACTIVITIES Martha West
This role means being the student body’s lead academic representative. It’s a fascinating chance to get a ‘behind the scenes’ look at how the university works at the highest levels, and to argue for change to WKH PRVW VHQLRU Ă€JXUHV within the university.
Coming into the poVLWLRQ RI LQà XHQFH DQG responsibility so soon after studying has been challenging but exciting. I have been able to improve my public speaking skills, been on TV, been involved in job interviews, learned how to adapt to different settings and gained a thicker skin when it comes to approaching strangers. I’ve organised a Trans Awareness Week, set up student parents meetings, planned a mental health campaign... read my blog for more!
My role is all about communication and people skills. I look at how UBU is perceived by its 18,000 members, making sure that everything we do is not only based on their needs, but communicated regularly. Managing relationships with the IXOO WLPH RIĂ€FHU WHDP University staff ranging from porters to vice-chancellors is also a crucial role, one which UHTXLUHV WDFW FRQĂ€GHQFH and conviction. Why not put your name forward?
My role is about supporting students in the wider community and city of Bristol. It’s as diverse as it sounds!
My role is one of the most student-facing of all the positions. With a high level of engagement with the 53 club captains and 13 members of the sports executive, you have the pleasure of working with very passionate and committed students.
My role provides the opportunity to ensure that any student is able to get involved and develop their interests and hobbies.
Beyond that, winning any student body election is an enormously humbling experience and a unique chance to develop all kinds of skills. If you have any issues that you’d like to raise, get in touch at ubu-education@bristol.ac.uk RU #à \QQ\
Get in touch at ubu-welfare@bristol.ac.uk or
tweet me @UBU_Welfare.
UBU News | Issue 7 | 04.02.2013
Email ubu-president@ bristol.ac.uk or tweet @P4ulCh4rlton.
My favourite aspect is working with ethical and environmental societies and campaigns. This role has given me the opportunity to work with groups from students to University staff to charities and has improved my patience, organisation and FRQÀGHQFH Get in touch at ubu-community@brisWRO DF XN RU ÀQG PH RQ Twitter @alicejpeck.
I also attend meetings about the strategic direction of sport and help organise the well-attended sports night and SCORE. This role was the best step I could have taken. Get in touch atubu-sport@bristol.ac.uk or @hannahpollak1.
There are many different WKLQJV \RX ÀQG \RXUVHOI getting involved in from sitting on a Board of Trustees to forming a Scrabble team. I can guarantee you’ll never be bored in the role. A year ago I was incredibly nervous but even the election process itself was a unique experience, and GHÀQLWHO\ ZRUWK LW Email me at ubu-activities@bristol.ac.uk or tweet @marth_west.
3
* weekly event Friday 1 LGBT History Month • 1-28 February Alumni Foundation Grant Deadline • (bristol.ac.uk/alumni/current-students/foundation) CRB Session • 10am-1pm, Do It! Hub, 4th Floor UBU (details at ubu.org.uk/volunteering)
*
Saturday 2
Your What’s On Guide February - March 2013
UBU Active: Lacrosse • 12-4pm, Coombe Dingle (ubu.org.uk/ubuactive) UBU Active: Rock Climbing • 3:30-5pm, St Werburgh’s Church (booking required) Karaoke night ‡ IURP SP %$5 IUHH GULQN IRU ÀUVW VLQJHU SUL]H IRU EHVW * Sunday 3 Fit and Fabulous Re-launch ‡ SP 6(+ IDFHERRN FRP XREÀWDQGIDEXORXV
Monday 4 National Student Survey Opens ‡ RSHQ WR ÀQDO \HDUV DW WKHVWXGHQWVXUYH\ FRP
Submission Deadline for AMM Amendments • (ubu.org.uk/amm) Eating Disorders Support Group • 6:30pm, Just Ask Centre, 4th Floor UBU 2-4-1 Iced Tea Cocktails • from 7pm, BAR 100 (Two cocktail teapots for £8)
*
Tuesday 5 CRB Session • 3-5pm, UBU Info Point (details at ubu.org.uk/volunteering)
*
Bristol Drugs Project Info Session • 6-8pm, Just Ask Centre (4th Floor, UBU)
*
5$* 4XL] 1LJKW ‡ IURP SP %$5 … IRU D JUHDW FDXVH ZLWK JUHDW SUL]HV * Wednesday 6 BUCS Sport • Coombe Dingle (ubu.org.uk/activities/sports/BUCS)
*
Fever Feeder • from 6pm, BAR 100 (£1.50 for Carlsburg, Gaymers or Vodka mixer)
*
Sports Night • 10pm-3am, Dorma (contact ubu-sport@bristol.ac.uk with any questions)
*
Thursday 7 Student Parents Coffee Morning • 9:30-11am, Multifaith Chaplaincy
Monday 25 Look After Your Mate Fortnight • 18-1 March (details at?)
*
Annual Members Meeting (AMM) • 2-5pm, Great Hall (Wills Memorial Building) Election Nominations Open • (ubu.org.uk/elections) DanceSoc: In the Spotlight • 7-9 February, Winston Theatre (ubutheatre.com) Live DJ ‡ IURP SP %$5 JUHDW GULQNV GHDOV *
Wednesday 27 BOpS: A Midsummer Night’s Dream • 27 Feb-2 Mar, Winston Theatre (bopsoc.tumblr.com) Thursday 28 Volunteering Induction • 4-6pm (book online at bit.ly/UBUtraining)
Friday 8 Volunteering Induction • 2-4pm (book online at bit.ly/UBUtraining) Sunday 1 Varsity: American Football • 2pm, SGS Filton (£5 tickets from club or the Info Point) Monday 11 Volunteering Week • 11-17 February (details at ubu.org.uk/volunteering) Bristol Islamic Society presents: Discover Islam Week • 11-16 February (brisoc.com) Postgrad Research Event • 12-4pm, LT2 behind 11 Woodland Rd (ubu-postgrads@bristol.ac.uk) Stand Up Bristol Comedy Night • 8pm, BAR 100 (free!) Wednesday 13 Ethical Careers Fair • 5-8pm, Social Science Building Volunteering Speed Dating • from 7pm (details coming soon at ubu.org.uk/volunteering) Saturday 16 RAG Week • 15-24 February (email rag-ubu@bristol.ac.uk to get involved) RAG Procession • Down Whiteladies to the City Centre (ubu.org.uk/activities/fundraising) Monday 18 Look After Your Mate • 18-1 March (ubu.org.uk) (OHFWLRQ 1RPLQDWLRQV &ORVH &DQGLGDWH %ULHÀQJ • (ubu.org.uk/elections) Eating Disorders Support Group • 6:30pm, Just Ask Centre, 4th Floor UBU Thursday 21 Student Council • 6-8pm. Tyndall Lecture Theatre, Physics Building, Tyndall Ave. Saturday 23 UBU Active: Rock Climbing • 3:30-5pm, St Werburgh’s Church (booking required)
UBU News | Issue 7 | 04.02.2013
Monday 4 UBU Trustee Board Meeting ‡ ÀQG RXW PRUH DW XEX RUJ XN DERXW
Elections Campaigning Starts • (ubu.org.uk/elections) Eating Disorders Support Group • 6:30pm, Just Ask Centre, 4th Floor UBU Friday 8 International Women’s Day ‡ ÀQG RXW PRUH DW XEX RUJ XN
Saturday 9 UBU Active: Rock Climbing • 3:30-5pm, St Werburgh’s Church (booking required) Monday 11 Elections Voting Opens • (ubu.org.uk/elections) Wednesday 13 READ International Donation Day • 12-6pm (contact ubu-volunteering@bristol.ac.uk) Volunteering Induction • 2-4pm (book online at bit.ly/UBUtraining) Friday 15 Election Results Party • (ubu.org.uk/elections) Monday 18 Varsity: Football • 6pm, the Memorial Stadium (£5 tickets on sale soon) Eating Disorders Support Group • 6:30pm, Just Ask Centre, 4th Floor UBU Wednesday 20 Varsity Day • Coombe Dingle (ubu.org.uk/activities/sports/varsity)
4
Editor: Lizi Woolgar style@ epigram.org.uk
@e2Style
Deputy: Alice Johnston deputystyle@ epigram.org.uk
In recent years there has been a surge in the demand for ‘real’ women, suggesting that models have become fashioned on the stick thin ideal of beauty and have, in turn, lost their grip on reality.
Style Style
Travel
Crystal Renn started her modelling career in high fashion at the age of 14, before being told to lose almost a third of her body weight in order to survive in such an industry. Crystal was plagued with years of anorexia nervosa, in which she survived on a diet of vegetables, Diet Coke and sugar-free jelly, whilst going on up to 10 castings and working out between four and eight hours each day. Realising the effect of the industry on her health, Renn later gained 70 pounds and re-emerged onto the scene as a U.K size 16, before being re-branded by her agents as a plus-size model. Renn appeared as a saviour to those girls who craved a more realistic image of beauty and refused to idolise the size 0 models littering both the commercial and high fashion ad campaigns. Renn graced the covers of Vogue, I.D. and V magazine whilst publicly endorsing this new honest outlook of the fashion industry with her book, Hungry: A Young Model’s Story of Appetite, Ambition and the Ultimate Embrace of Curves.
Sketch: Katy Papineau
Living Living
: Crystal Renn
However, in early 2012 she shocked the masses and embarked on a dramatic weight loss, shrinking down to a size 8 and raising fears that the recovered anorexic had relapsed. Many in the plus-size community felt that they had been deceived by such a transformation,
CARA Little Miss Cara Delevigne. It has been pretty difficult this year to turn over a magazine page, peruse a website or watch a catwalk show without those distinct, animated features popping up. London born and bred, the 20 year old model has shot to stardom in less than 2 years. After being signed to Storm Model Management in 2011, she went on to be signed by 6 other model agencies scattered around the world in the blink of an eye. Her big break came in the form of 5 Burberry campaigns over the course of 2011, however most will probably only remember the Burberry S/S 2012 collection, modelling alongside the divine god that is Eddie Redmayne, shot by Mario Testino. Having since modelled for countless designers, her most recent work includes a Chanel campaign (Chanel Resort 2013 Campaign), modelling for DKNY (S/S 2013) and even walking in the renowned 2012 Victoria’s secret show. This culminated in her being coined “star face” at the A/W 2013/13 show season by British Vogue and being awarded “model of the year” at the 2012 British Fashion Awards. But it’s not just the fashion world she’s taken by storm (ha, geddit?). Her alluring features and charm have made her quite the it-girl. With celeb pals Azeaila Banks, Rita Ora and RiRi, her comical character seems to be capable of hypnotising anyone. With innumerable runway shows, an acting debut and unbelievable modelling campaigns under her belt before hitting 21, it seems Miss Delevigne, and those signature eyebrows, won’t be falling off our radar any time soon. Lizi Woolgar
POPPY Although Cara seems to be stealing the limelight at the moment, older sister Poppy has already stacked up some serious fashion credentials. As Young Ambassador for the British Fashion Council, Poppy is well respected and influential in the world of fashion and her role as Chanel brand Ambassador means her wardrobe is inevitably incredible.
attributing Crystal’s drastic makeover to her desire to be pitched to mainstream brands. PLUS Model Magazine Editor-in-Chief Madeline Jones stated, ‘We have been betrayed by her…we’re not that stupid, we know how hard it is to lose weight and she insulted our intelligence.’ Renn retaliated, describing how her plus-sized critics, ‘wanted to find a conspiracy where there absolutely was none’, stating how, if she had continued her overeating, she would have had to develop another eating disorder to live up to keep her size 16 frame. Renn demonstrates how unhealthy eating habits are adopted across the spectrum, as there is not only a pressure to stay skinny in the fashion world, but also to stay curvy in order to appeal to the plus-sized market. This model’s story personifies how, in a business obsessed with beauty, there is always an unachievable ideal. Renn has the final word on her own experience in this image obsessed culture, stating, ‘I‘ve always felt, in some ways, like an outsider. But that is the fashion industry.’ Leading one to question whether, when it comes to the fashion world, one must enter at their their own peril. Chloe Bushell
The Next Big Deals
Move over McQueen and McCartney – there’s a new generation
of young British designers on the block. The designers that established themselves in the 2000s have created well-known classic pieces, such as the iconic Alexander McQueen skull scarves pictured on nearly everyone from Beyoncé to Russell Brand, or the Stella McCartney Falabella bag sported by Angelina Jolie, Kate Hudson and JLo. The new age of talent has brought a range of exotic and exciting creations. Designers such as Sophie Hulme, J.W.Anderson, Mary Katranzou and Charlotte Olympia (to name but a few) have been catching glimpses from the movers and shakers in the fashion industry since their respective launches this decade.
A collaboration with high street brands is a sure fire way to
She has modelled for high street faves such as of Mango, Laura Ashley and Burberry in the past, as well as being Agent Provocateur’s Valentine girl in their latest adverts. Jealous much? With her having just been announced as the new face of Danish brand Vero Moda, be prepared to be seeing a lot more of her. Poppy is the brand’s latest Brit crush, following in the footsteps of Alexa Chung who featured as the ambassador of Vero Moda’s Autumn 2012 collection. Blessed with the same enviable gene pool, she shares the same blonde hair and blue eyes as her younger sister, and her demure and sophisticated look will perfectly complement the feminine floral patterns and pastel prints featured in the collection. The best part? It’s all affordable on a student budget, which means you can get your hands on this covetable collection without the guilt of a postChristmas splash out.
Nia Warren
increase awareness; Topshop’s collections with J. W. Anderson and Mary Katranzou gave these young designers an outlet to reach the everyday shopper and not just the ‘fashion elite’. Charlotte Olympia Dellal has been dubbed the British Christian Louboutin, with her shoes featured seemingly everywhere from Anne Hathaway to Katy Perry since her infamous Kitty Flats were spotted on Alexa Chung.
Sophie Hulme’s bags and coats, simple yet structured, are what caught the eye of just about every fashion magazine out there: Vogue, Elle, Grazia and InStyle are a mere smattering of the number of publications she has been featured in.
With such a wealth of talent
emerging from the country’s capital, and established designers still going strong, it’s no wonder that London has rated as one of the world’s top fashion shopping destinations. Samara Brackley
04.02.13
FUZE 2013: Fashion show preview
Fuze is England’s largest student Fashion, Dance and Music event. Run solely by Bristol University students, entirely for charity. With walks from brands such as Topshop, Topman, Derek Lawlor and Puckoo Couture, we are in for an incredibly fashionable treat this year. Check it out on Friday 15th or Saturday 16th Febuary. Get your tickets now at fuze-bristol.com.
Photography: Zoe Nash
Editor: Lizi Woolgar style@ epigram.org.uk
Living
@e2Style
Deputy: Alice Johnston deputystyle@ epigram.org.uk
Photography: Zoe Nash
Style
I just can’t get you out of my Ted
Travel
Luke Wiltshire reveals his long term addiction to a certain clothing brand... It should have become apparent months ago that I have a problem. When all sense of rationality breaks down and all financial reasoning skews beyond comprehension, action should surely be taken. Yet the problem persists. Every time it happens the warm, soothing satisfaction puts the stamp of certainty on the next occurrence, which will undoubtedly happen sooner rather than later. The sinister addiction I harbour is not the injecting of narcotics, but the purchasing of goods from Ted Baker. And not just the odd pair of socks here and there either (three pairs bought to date), but specimens from across the whole spectrum of clothing. There are days when I go out dressed almost entirely in Ted Baker and it feels not disgusting, but deeply fulfilling. The value of the products is now so inflated in my mind compared to its competitors that if I’m after a new item, I often don’t look anywhere else. The problem started around two years ago. Since then, I’ve spent slightly over £500 on TB items. I just worked that out and am reeling slightly. This would be fine if I had a job, but I do not. I absolutely lack the resolve to budget sensibly, so by simply
not looking at my bank balance I allow each dollop of precious student loan to drop out far too easily. This inevitably culminates in end-of-term overdraft issues, and some difficult conversations with parents. The issue, my rational mind tells me, is all down to the marketing. It pushes my buttons in such a clinically precise way it could have been specifically tailored to empty my wallet. Where other brands (ew) of similar price range are cold, boring and faceless, Ted - yes, we’re on first name terms - calls out to me with a cheery smile, promising class and quality while not being boring about it (the obvious irony here being that, if you’re reading this, you’re probably quite bored). Sealing the deal is my terrible affliction of impulsive buying. Not just clothing, either. I once bought an extendable, telescopic fork for no reason at all. It proved very ineffective as an eating device. Since I began writing this my search for a new shirt came to an expensive end, the final straw being the simple words ‘do it’ uttered by my girlfriend. After days of considered deliberation, that one small push is all it takes. All other less pricey non-Ted Baker options were discarded,
of course, in the manner to which I have become accustomed. The obsession started in-store, where the homely decor and friendly, attractive yet humble staff make me
“There are days when I go out dressed almost entirely in Ted Baker and it feels not disgusting, but deeply fulfilling” feel like parting with my money is simply the right thing to do. It isn’t just the marketing that makes me keep going back. Ted’s clothing is (on the whole) classic, classy, interesting, fun,
well made, impeccably cut, and generally hits all the notes my flaky fashion sense wants to hit. At the back of my mind I think it’s one of the larger incentives I have to obtain a decent regular income, so I can stroll into Ted Baker and buy a few shirts without guilt (or maybe even a whole suit - that will be the day). More importantly, to be able to buy at full price and not have to wait for the sales as I currently manage to do some of the time, utilising the modicum of restraint I still own. That, surely, is the pinnacle of success. The day may come when I move on with my life. In my mind, this is the day Ted gets traded in for the more illustrious, more expensive, and altogether more desirable (and currently out of legal financial reach, fortunately) Paul Smith. A viable alternative is that I’ll go bankrupt and have to live a lesser form of life (insert generic Topman snub here). Until that day comes, I’m quite content basking, serenely and naïvely, in the glorious warm comfort of Ted.
04.02.13
The marmite of fashion: Abercrombie & Fitch Thirty years ago you would have struggled to find anyone who had heard of ‘Abercrombie and Fitch’, except perhaps a local newspaper reporting on the bankruptcy of a small clothing line in Manhattan. Today the franchise today boasts over 1000 stores worldwide, reportedly taking in over $4 billion annually. Whilst the UK has watched other retail brands such as La Senza and Jane Norman crumble, Abercrombie has demonstrated to retailers everywhere that it is an unstoppable force. To the average person, this may seem odd. Parents tend to abhor it and young adults actively avoid it, at least in the UK anyway. Not only that, the company is continuously riddled with controversy. Recently, many associates from its partner brand ‘Hollister Co’ were fired following the opening of a new store in Korea, in which staff tweeted pictures of themselves squinting their eyes closed and making fun of their accents. And that was only in 2012. In the past the company has faced a number of criticisms from forcing a girl with a prosthetic arm stay in the stockroom rather than the shop floor, to selling pushup bikinis for young girls in the kids range.
So how does a company which amasses such criticism and negativity not only survive, but continue to expand? To put it simply: with military proficiency and resilience. Whilst working for Gilly Hicks, aptly named the “cheeky cousin of Abercrombie and Fitch”, I began to get the gist. During my first week I was handed a measuring instrument, similar to a ruler, which was set to one inch. My task? To go around the entire store and measure the distance between each folded pile of clothes and the edge of the table. A week later I found a three page instruction booklet on how to specifically clean the fake plastic plants. I started to get the
ened p o t n a Mary Qoun the King’sas Bazaar 1955. This wy of Road inletely new waailing a compfashion - a ret selling revolution.
C – 1o9co Cha 20s: L nel BD
YSL – “Le Smoking” (first trouser suit for women) - 1966
picture. On a general staff corkboard in the stockroom, a notice is placed centrally, asking ‘are you ready for the show?’ This is the company’s infamous ‘look policy’ – no facial hair for boys, no make up for girls but plenty of enthusiasm and smiles all round. And the company’s own words say it best: the store is like a show and each shift is the opening night. Stubble on the topless male model’s chest? Better shave it off.
that means paying members of Jersey Shore to refrain from wearing their clothes, then so be it.
But, despite the obsessive attention to detail behind closed doors, the company markets itself on a laid-back image. You won’t have to hunt for a member of staff to find the item you want, nor will you see shelves of unwanted clothes in the fitting rooms. The brand is so smooth it purposely chooses not to advertise intentionally to create an enigma and to stimulate interest. It’s a lifestyle brand and image that they will defend by any means necessary and if
Just remember, next time you sift through a pile of clothes to find your size to find your size, you can guarantee that someone has measured it, literally, to acheive visual
Madness or genius, it seems to work. The company has perhaps the best understanding and approach to brand awareness in retail. There is not one detail that they miss, even if you do. Fly across the world to a small mall in New Jersey and they will be wearing the same clothes and playing the same songs as the one in your local shopping centre.
Izzy Kerr
Galliano sacked: Feb 2011 – after highly anti-semitic behaviour.
BIBA: T store whis landmark in 1964 as opened by HulanicBarbara ki
VOGUE: In 1891 Arthur Turnure founded Vogue as a weekly publication in the United States.
: h t a e ’s d010 n e e u 1th 2 MFcQ eb 1
Sketch: Katy Papineau
Izzy Kerr gives us hertake on them after working for the brand.
Editor: Alicia Queiro travel@ epigram.org.uk
@e2Travel
! h g i h s t ge
Deputy: Alex Bradbrook deputytravel@ epigram.org.uk
As the greasy, thick pizza slid down my gullet for the third meal time in a row, my anger towards the others began to bubble up unpleasantly; I feverishly glugged at my flat, faux–7Up to appease myself. Whilst it seems that these Neanderthals are in Amsterdam with the sole purpose of maximum possible hedonism, I had hoped to see at least a little culture when I agreed to infiltrate and observe the self-proclaimed ‘big deal in Hiatt Baker’ crew. After all, Amsterdam is famous for its canals, the Van Gogh Museum and its Edam. But I had quickly realised that it was a different kind of local produce that attracted Harper, CJ and Toad to this wonderful city.
Style
“As he climbed onto the bed, I heard the rhythmic creaking of our joined bunks, swaying to the beat of Toad’s gruesome party for one.” At first, I thought it would be wonderful. Yet we have been here for just over 24 hours and thus far have travelled approximately a six-shop radius around our hostel. Earlier today I hadn’t particularly minded the lethargy, having endured an especially traumatising night’s sleep in our 14-man dorm room. As the cacophony of snoring, wheezing and farting had just become repetitive enough to allow some shut-eye, a rotund, hunched figure emerged through the doorway, donning one of those meshstring vests, with some three-quarter length baggy camo shorts to boot.
Beneath the safety of my suspiciously stained rug, I watched Toad lug his large body towards our bunk, hoping to every deity I could think of that he had clocked up enough café time to warrant a quick and peaceful descent into slumber, rather than add to the already critical noise levels in the zoo that was our home for the trip. Much to his credit, he didn’t turn the light on like those arguing Spanish guys an hour earlier. Unfortunately, Toad had something else in store for me. As he changed, he wantonly paraded his genitals about in my general breathing space next to the bunk, before beginning the predictably arduous ascent to the top level. Having reached the summit I was expecting the heavy breathing, but not that sound of flesh on flesh, not the rhythmic creaking of our joined bunks, swaying to the beat
Flickr: Claudio.Ar
Living
Meet our new secret agent, reluctantly sampling all Amsterdam has to offer: Part One of Toad’s gruesome party for one. As I tried to both recollect (out of interest) and systematically erase (out of concern for my mind’s hygiene) the memories of the previous night, I was interrupted by Harper telling me we were ready to go, followed by a swift belch of approval from the hell hole that Toad called his mouth. Christ, he was horrible. After clearing the stacks of paper plates and half-gnawed pizza crusts from our table, I caught up with the others outside so I could find out what our plans were for the evening. I remained hopeful that we would stick to the itinerary I had emailed everyone some weeks before the holiday, but the moment I brought it up CJ aggressively questioned why I even wanted to come if I didn’t want to enjoy
Anonymous
d i o v a o t w o Ouch! H raw deal aIf you travel without insurance, you could be set back... In the USA...
Dear e2 ,
Travel
As we descended some stairs into yet another dingy grotto that had the gall to call itself a café, I realised that we were not – as my itinerary had suggested – ambling lightheartedly towards the outdoor art festival that had been recommended to me with such enthusiasm by my uncle Malcolm. Sour, and worn down by the day’s monotony, I ordered a cup of weak green tea at the bar to perk me up, whilst the others hashed out the alternative menu: twice as long as the food and drinks menu combined, a touch I found deeply distasteful. For the next few hours, I quietly sipped my tea (which, incidentally, was far too strong) and pretended to read my copy of Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas; a book I had zero interest in but had bought purely because of its flagrant drug references – something I thought might get me some brownie points with the boys. As I listened in on their conversation, amidst the smoke and general sense of lacklustre confusion that seemed to overwhelm all of these cafés, a beacon of hope glimmered. They were talking animatedly about getting some mushrooms and heading to the park tomorrow. So they had read my itinerary! I knew that even these guys would enjoy a nice outdoor picnic.
Wish you were here!
With on dayligh ly a few hou and ble t during the rs of animal ak winter, ancold These Ic has to be ha y stopped elandic hors rdy. es the mis to say hello w t y ith , snow-c moutai apped n s of t harsh i he coun distanc nterior in th try’s e e.
Got a holid travel@ep ay snap to share? igram.org Send it to .uk
the ‘local produce’, as they consistently referred to it. God, these guys are stupid. All they do in between their nonsensical giggling is refuel on the ‘local stock’, and then agree with each other about how much better it is here than back home.
Love , James Crosby -G
ayler x
...£45,000 for a broken leg. ...£35,000 for two days in intensive care.
e an... In trh ne a r Medite mach, o t s a r n fo ...£20e0, ear infectrio ach unburn o . s dration dehy
Recent research by First Assist 2011 for Saga - costs are based on a treatment as an inpatient or outpatient in a private facility
Flickr:kenner116
04.02.13
A day in ... Lisbon
It really is the dog’s dangleys. Everything - from the milky galão (the closest an Englishman will get to what they believe to be white coffee), to the mosaic shiny pavements (all of them - they just don’t walk on tarmac), to the freeroaming peacocks in the Castelo de São Jorge, to the no.28 tram ride to and from the ancient quarter of Graça, which is quite simply like a children’s ‘Train Ride Through The Ages’ that you might get in a museum - is just amazing. I’d never have thought that I could get quite so excited about urban public transport, but that tram is the stuff of legends. It would be criminal to visit the city and not do a lap. While on the subject of transport, the metro is an unprecedented delight – blue, green, red and yellow lines. Compared to the rabbit warren saturated with angry, smelly Brits that is the London underground, the Lisbon metro is like visiting a spa.
That done, you should walk down to the Praco do Comercio - the main square in Lisbon down on the River Tagus where all the magic happened throughout the years. A beautiful square in itself, from there take a tram out to Belém, where you should be put in a cell if you don’t visit the world-famous Pastéis de Belém. The original. The pioneer. The daddy of all pastelerias. If you’ve ever had a pastel de nata from Starbucks or Nandos – this is where they were born, people. The pastry chefs have to sign a contract of secrecy before working there, legally binding them never to disclose their treasured recipe. During my time living in Lisbon, that single establishment was the sole cause for my returning home a vast spherical pastel colossus, and I don’t regret one bit of it. What else? Get out to Estoril to smoke away money in Portugal’s biggest casino, try bacalhau, drink lots of caipirinha, marvel at the Monumento aos
Descobrimentos overlooking the river, release your inner two-year-old at the zoo’s dolphin show, marvel at Europe’s biggest tank in the Oceanário de Lisboa, glug Super Bock, try banana pizza, and definitely don’t bother with heels. Unfortunately, the Portuguese economy being what it is means that prospects there are pretty bleak. I don’t think that I could live there – there just isn’t enough opportunity at the moment. However, for now it shall be my mistress for dirty weekends away, and so far we are having a truly magnificent affair.
Verity Stockdale
Verity Stockdale
If you had one day, top of the list would be that Castelo de São Jorge, which is quite possibly the most picturesque, unspoilt castle I have ever visited (and I have visited a lot). Unspoilt partly because of its pristine condition and lack of signs telling tourists where they can and can’t go, but also because of its glorious lack of safety barriers. You can sit back and drink in the breathtaking
views to the blissful soundtrack of mothers screeching at their three-year-olds teetering just inches from a 10-second freefall.
Verity Stockdale
Lisbon – just a hop, skip and a jump away from England, truly. One afternoon you could be out walking the dog in the lush green English countryside, coming inside to the smell of crumpets, kicking sheep poo off your wellies and watching Jamie Oliver lisp his way through jointing a chicken, and the next strolling down a beautiful Avenida in the centre of what I truly believe to be one of the best cities in Europe, wishing all and sundry a bom dia.
Great deals and broken wheels: exploring Cuba After visiting Cuba, it shocked me how such contrasts in culture and lifestyle prevail between Cubans and tourists. Arriving in Havana was like stepping back into America in the 1950s: we were picked up from the airport in a classic car, which, at first, I absolutely loved, even though the driver ignored all the traffic lights claiming ‘no son importante’. When I found out how old the cars were, however, I suddenly became very aware of the creaking of the wheels as the driver raced along bustling streets and through countless more red lights.
long as within five minutes we arrived at a local’s shop where we bought a packet of cigars – again, going against all advice from the tourist guides, but necessary in order to get a feel for local life! On asking how much
To get a less tourist-orientated perspective of the city, we went against all advice and wandered into the old city at night. One of our missions while we were there was to try out the Cuban cigars and rum that we had been told so much about. This didn’t take
Katie Irving
“The driver got out and told us that it was just ‘un poco problema’ – as the wheel fell off.”
promenade, accompanied by hundreds of young people who were gathering to drink, play music, dance and hang out – arguably Cuba’s answer to the Triangle. Before long, we witnessed a car, not dissimilar to that which we got from the airport earlier, break down. The driver got out and told us that it was just ‘un poco problema’ – as the wheel fell off. After this comical moment, we then attempted to smoke one of our cigars, to the amusement of the locals, who walked over after witnessing our embarrassing struggle and showed us how it was done. They also plied us with rum – at 70% strength – which we later discovered was only a few pence for a large bottle. In exchange, they wanted to know about where we were from: with the Internet controlled by the government they knew very little about what was happening in the world around
they were, in my best Spanish, we tried to give the shopkeeper 10 pesos (around £6); in which the man laughed and tried to explain it was 1 peso for 24 cigars – or 62p. Now, that’s a good deal if I ever heard one. On the edge of the city we walked along the
them – an unimaginable concept to any Brit. Towards the end of the evening, I asked them whether there was any crime or resentment towards such wealthy tourists, seeing as the locals live in such poverty. They answered by informing us that the oppression from the government brought the community together, and that they did not take their anger towards the government out on the tourists, as it was the tourists’ spending and tipping which kept them alive: an alien concept to us a country of high wages and government accountability. Despite it being so close to the USA, Cuba’s culture is so remarkably different to ours in the UK. It’s a land of contrasts, government control and poverty – but somehow, the people, natural beauty and quirkiness make it one of the most enigmatic countries in the world.
Katie Irving
Editor: Alicia Queiro travel@ epigram.org.uk
@e2Travel
The devil wears...pumps?
AIRMAIL
Being a country girl at heart, who is only really at home in muddy wellies, heels were a drastic move for me and yet one that I felt was necessary for my survival. There is a constant pressure here to look as chic as possible, and even those who don’t have the funds for the extraordinarily overpriced boutiques (and I can assure you that the salary of an intern is nowhere near sufficient) do their best to pretend they have the money.
L 15, Rue e Piment, de Sevig né If you fin d yourse lf
Travel
a bit thir day of fr sty after ugal sigh a long tseeing, feet to L drag you e Pimen r weary t – a ho from the p, skip a Saint Pa nd a jum ul metro will be w p stop, wh armly w ere you elcomed by a wh ole host characte of rs. This cha rming ba r has an café cult authenti ure feel c Parisia to it, tha where yo n nks to th u are fre e co sy booth e for hours to discuss s on end. existenti If you’ve alism superma long tire rket win d of chea e, grab th hour’ fro p e €3 bee m 6pm r at ‘hap - 9pm, py or try th eir ‘Ti P speciality unch’ for €5.
Puces x u a é h c r a M en de Saint-Ou
come by in are hard to led Good deals s have traw er rgain hunt ba t bu t s, ke ri ar Pa flea m ost famous the city’s m ose to Porte Cl s. 0 0 8 1 te la e th ce sin n at the metro statio Clignancourt eded to sift ne half a day is al , ge ed ’s ty ci e of individu treasure trov as ch through this su s ea ilored to ar markets, ta just general iture, art or rn fu e antiqu bric-a-brac. for a bit steep ices can be to le ib Although pr ss po y items, it is ellery, higher qualit rt Deco jew A d in -k -a ines az ag m find one-of and hes, posters assis al M vintage clot é ch ar 20, with M for under € best finds. e th ng offeri
Flickr: fabbio
Although this is clearly a very effective way of navigating the Parisian scene, my feminist pride rather gets in the way of being able to pull this off. I suppose I’ll have to content myself with feeling poor and unfashionable, and get used to life outside the à-la-mode bubble.
When one thinks of Germany, unfortunately, and unfairly, outdated stereotypes and generalisations are made. Naturally, we can distinguish ourselves from our beer-drinking counterparts in some ways more than others: Germans are often – but not always – seriously and practically dressed; believing that Sunday is an excuse to do nothing and stay indoors, studying is the only option until one is thirty, riding a bike is a must, crossing the road at a red man is a no go and managing to ensure that they say, out loud, everything they are thinking. Admittedly, Germany has a negative history but, through the generations, the population have modernised dramatically, whilst ensuring that the past is not forgotten. Living in Nuremberg, reminders of the Nazi era are ever-present, yet the negative connotations are immediately lost when visiting the city. The beer gardens, the Christmas markets, the local foods, the shopping and the wealth of industry and business are all delights waiting to be sampled, immersed within the beautifully-restored city.
PARIS?
But how do you pretend you can
What’s the deal with...
Unexpected beauty and kindness in Germany
Germany is never going to be a typical summer holiday destination, but it is a country with a wealth of tradition - namely in Bavaria: their state supports and encourages beer festivals – and culture that we Brits should not be too quick to disregard. Indeed, as an Englishwoman, many here are impressed and surprised when they realise that I can speak their language: it is something they do not expect.
Ciara McCarthy reveals the city’s best bargains...
L’As du Fall afe 34 Rue des l, Rosiers
Nestled in th e heart of th e Marais, the city’s tr endy Jewish quarter, this falafel take-a way-slash-r estaurant is surrounded by, well, othe take-away-s r falafel lash-restaur ants. But L’ du Fallafel is As something sp ecial, famed for Paris’ ta stiest falafe l. If the phot and recomm os endations by their most famous patr on, the lege ndary Lenn Kravitz, do y not persuade you, just see the queue!
At only €5 for a takeaw ay, this is the most de licious place to eat on a budget. Savo ur it at the nearby Plac des Vosges, e a former ro yal residence meal fit for : a a king, witho ut the roya l price tag.
Above: Marché aux Puces
But to me, one small act encapsulates my experience in Germany. Having clumsily lost my purse near Nuremberg station, I returned home and lost faith in the human race, thinking it had been stolen. On ringing the lost property office and finding out it had been handed in, I made it my aim to find out who it was and thank them myself, so I wrote to the Nürnberger Nachrichten newspaper. Ironically, once the article appeared in the newspaper, my finder contacted me, as it was he who wanted to thank me, for wanting to thank him. He, like the vast majority of Germans I’ve met, are friendly, honest, open-minded and welcoming, who appreciate people who have an interest in their culture and traditions. Wherever I am, whoever I meet, in the supermarket, in the lift at work going up to my seventh floor, in a restaurant, café or bar, you will always hear: ‘good morning!’, ‘have a good day/ evening/weekend’, ‘enjoy your meal’, and they genuinely mean it. Perhaps it’s not a country you’d immediately associate with such behaviour, but it’s one of the aspects that makes it such a special place to visit. Flickr: roboppy
I was well aware of the elegant typecast of the typical Parisian, but I suspected that it was either a thing of the past or contained
“You cannot possibly get the metro with a date!”
afford this fashion-filled lifestyle? One of my colleagues has come up with a few ingenious methods. Firstly, she spends nearly her whole salary in Zara on clothes that can be passed off as more expensive than they are. Secondly, she has ensured that she has many rich friends who are prone to donating her the odd €500 Burberry coat here and there. Thirdly, she only ever goes out clubbing or on a date if she can arrive in a car – because, and I quote: ‘You cannot possibly get the metro with a date, that would spoil the whole evening!’. And lastly, she has built up a friendship with just about every bouncer in Paris so as to be able to get in to the expensive clubs and thus make more rich friends.
Flickr: shingo
As a classic example, within a week of my arrival, I found myself in the middle of a parc sunbathing, smoking and discussing philosophy. Unfortunately, my French was still very rusty at this stage and so it was rather difficult to follow, not helped by my late night playing pétanque (aka boules) and the resulting winehead. My French companions were only too happy to laugh at my ‘English’ ignorance, and luckily they seem to find this endearing rather than anything else.
solely within the upper classes. I was not expecting to have to come face to face with it every day at work. I very quickly had to modify the way I dressed as the scruffy Converse and denim cut-offs that I normally live in were definitely not acceptable. I had to start wearing my scruffy-but-so-comfy pumps for the commute and change into my heels hidden round the corner before anyone saw me, DevilWears-Prada style.
Flickr: KayOne73
Style
Living
Bobbie Bickerton explores the chic-er side of Paris
Before I arrived in France I thought I knew what to expect from my stay in the capital. Having frequently travelled to the country before, I mistakenly believed that I knew most of what there was to know about the culture, and therefore was unlikely to get any sort of culture shock. However, I very quickly realised that this was not going to be the case. In more ways than expected, the Parisians really do live up to their stereotypes.
Deputy: Alex Bradbrook deputytravel@ epigram.org.uk
Katie Moss Foreign Correspondent in Germany
STUDENT ELECTIONS 2013 Nominations close 18 February at 5pm Voting is open 11 - 15 March at 1pm 5HSUHVHQW \RXU IHOORZ VWXGHQWV DV D )XOO WLPH 2IÀFHU 3DUW WLPH 2IÀFHU RU D 'HOHJDWH DW WKH 186 1DWLRQDO &RQIHUHQFH 3LFN XS DQ (OHFWLRQV *XLGH DW WKH 6WXGHQWV· 8QLRQ WKH ,QIR 3RLQW RU GRZQORDG D IRUP RQOLQH DQG QRPLQDWH \RXUVHOI WR OHDG \RXU XQLRQ
XEX RUJ XN HOHFWLRQV
It’s what we do
DELIVERING TILL
7 DAYS A WEEK 119 Whiteladies Road, Clifton BS8 2PL
439 Gloucester Road, Horfield BS7 8TZ
Opening Hours: 10am – 5am 7 days a week, Collection Sun – Thurs 1am, Fri & Sat 2am
Opening Hours: 10am – Late, 7 days a week
(0117) 97 33 400
(0117) 95 12 777
dominos.co.uk Delivering till 5am – Whiteladies store only