Light Magazine - "Marriage Redefined?" by The Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission

Summer 2015 Volume 1, Issue 1

Russell Moore with Rosaria Butterfield J.D. Greear on Preaching like Jesus to the LGBTQ Community R. Albert Mohler, Jr. on Same-Sex Marriage and Higher Education

AUGUST 5, 2015 MUSIC CITY CENTER, NASHVILLE, TENN.

THE 2015 ERLC NATIONAL CONFERENCE WILL HELP EQUIP YOU TOWARD GOSPEL-CENTERED ENGAGEMENT. Tired of politics as usual? Join Russell Moore, Samuel Rodriquez, and other evangelical leaders for an important discussion on the gospel and politics. Held in downtown Nashville immediately following the NAMB SEND North America Conference.

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FROM THE PRESIDEN T

HOW DEFINING MARRIAGE MATTERS Russell Moore

HINGS HAVE CHANGED. NO, people are not more sinful now than they were in Eden, and no, the “good old days” weren’t that good. But we do face a challenge in this generation that previous generations did not face. For the first time in Western history, we must explain what marriage is. As we do so, we must remember several things. First of all, we cannot afford to shrug this off and just agree to disagree. Marriage isn’t merely a matter of personal import or private behavior. States recognize marriage for a reason, and that reason is that sexuality between a man and a woman can, and often does, result in children. The state has an interest in seeing to it that, wherever possible, every child has both a mother and a father. The state doesn’t create this reality. It merely recognizes it, and attempts to hold husbands and wives, fathers and mothers, accountable to their vows and to their responsibilities. In every aspect of the Sexual Revolution, from the divorce culture to cohabitation to casual sex to the abortion revolution, children have borne the burden. The price of getting marriage wrong isn’t a onetime cost. It’s an inheritance that goes beyond our lifetime. Beyond that, we have already seen that the Sexual Revolution isn’t content to move forward into bedrooms and dinner tables. The Sexual Revolution wants to silence dissent. The religious liberty concerns we are grappling with already will only accelerate. At the heart of this debate is the question of authority. No one person or institution has the right to redefine an institution that wasn’t created by man or government in the first place. At the same time, we shouldn’t wring our hands in fear or clench our fists in outrage as we see attempts at this

AT THE HEART OF THIS DEBATE IS THE QUESTION OF AUTHORITY

pop up all around us. Marriage in the minds of the public may change, but marriage as a creation reality won’t change at all. Jesus has given us marriage, and it is grounded not in government fiat but in God’s creation (Matt. 19:4; Mk. 10:6). The other thing to keep in mind is that the Sexual Revolution cannot keep its promises. People will be disappointed, and ultimately left in search of something more permanent, more ancient. We must be the people who can preserve the light to the old paths. This means the church of Jesus must be prepared to both articulate and embody a Christian vision of marriage and sexuality. Articulating this Christian vision is not optional. It is clear that we cannot assume our surrounding culture agrees with God about the nature and purpose of sexuality and marriage. But that’s not a new situation. The New Testament epistles had to do the same thing for the people of God within a hostile Roman Empire. We must spell out why marriage matters, in light of who we are as men and women and in light of the gospel mystery of Christ and his church (Eph. 5:22-33). Churches also must reclaim marriage from the ambient culture in how they perform weddings and hold couples accountable. The undisciplined churches of the past generation acted as though the culture could keep marriages together, with just some preaching and encouragement from us. This led to the chaos we too often see in our own pews, with marital abandonment, unbiblical divorce, and more. Outsourcing marital expectations to the culture will now mean that our marriages preach a different gospel, one that upends the cosmic mystery of Christ. We cannot afford to dispense with the gospel. Marriage is resilient. God created it to be so. Regardless of our society’s stance and increasingly destructive decision, let’s be a church that can carry the gospel to hurting people. Let’s articulate and embody a Christian vision of marriage. If we’re out of step with the culture, we should ask why we haven’t been so all along. ERLC. com

CONTENTS PERSPECTIVES

It was his mother’s prayers that moved Christopher Yuan from imprisonment and drugs to a life dedicated to Christ.

Must Christians choose between civility and conviction? J.D. Greear shows how to lead well on the issue of homosexuality.

SPOTLIGHT

Joy Allmond writes about Mike Goeke’s personal journey as a catalyst for ministry in the LGBT community.

Russell Moore talks with Rosaria Butterfield about her unlikely conversion to Christianity.

Editor in Chief RUSSELL MOORE

Editor DANIEL DARLING Light Magazine is a publication of the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission 505 2nd St, N.E. , Washington, D.C. 20002 901 Commerce St, Ste 550, Nashville, TN 37203 www.ERLC.com

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Managing Editor LINDSAY SWARTZ

Staff editors JILL WAGGONER

MARIE DELPH KEVIN SHELL

Creative Director JASON THACKER Graphic Designer JACOB BLAZE

Our inaugural cover, illustrated by Jacob Blaze, depicts the Supreme Court’s power in the marriage debate.

PLUS:

We asked five mothers how they talk to their children about marriage, sex and same-sex marriage in this ERLC roundtable.

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POINT/COUNTERPOINT: Signing Civil Marriage Certificates THE ERLC THROUGHOUT THE YEARS:

speaks to the ERLC, and Richard SA M E E S E X Chuck M A R R IColson AG E A N D C H R I S T I A N HLand I G H Eauthors R E D U C an AT Ihistoric ON SBC statement on race. By R . Al b e r t Mo h l e r, Jr.

R. Albert Mohler, Jr. on the collision course between gay rights and Christian higher education.

EQUIP

Andrew Walker and Eric Teetsel on why marriage is a creational good for human flourishing.

ALSO IN THIS ISSUE

FROM THE EDITOR

BOOK REVIEWS

A new resource from the ERLC to help Christians minister faithfully to same-sex attracted men and women.

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From cultural and ethical commentary to interviews with leading evangelicals, ERLC offers valuable content for you on the go. Find episodes at ERLC.com/podcasts.

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FROM THE EDITOR

SEND THE LIGHT “

SEND THE LIGHT, THE blessed gospel light, let it shine, from shore to shore,” are the lyrics I sang, over and over, in church. I’ve grown to appreciate the words of this hymn more as I’ve gotten older and fully grasped the enormity of our gospel mission. Much of our hymnody reflects a cosmic battle between light and darkness—a visual we find on the pages of Scripture, from the dawning of creation until the final consummation in eternity. But this war between light and darkness is not the kind of generic “good versus evil” duality we find in our literature, movies and music. The story the Bible tells is much different, where God is light and “in him is no darkness at all” (1 John 1:5) and the Son of God is “the light that lights every man who comes into the world” (1 John 1:9). Christians are not locked into an equally balanced death-struggle between “forces of good” and “forces of evil” as if the outcome of the contest is up for grabs. We’re part of a new Kingdom people, led by our victorious warrior King, who, as the Light, has defeated sin, death and the enemy. In other words, the darkness we see in the world is only the last vestiges of sin, whose elimination will happen in full when Jesus comes. When Jesus says to his followers, “You are the light of the world” (Matthew 5:14), it is a joyful announcement that, in His Church, the Bride of Christ, is a visible symbol of the Light that has already defeated darkness and of the full light of the glory of Christ that will one day be revealed at Jesus’ Second Coming. It is this kind of light that we hope to offer with the reemergence of Light Magazine. For many years, Light was a publication of the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission before giving way to other periodicals, such as For Faith and Family. The intention then and now is to help Southern

WHAT DOES FAITHFUL, GOSPEL-CENTERED MINISTRY LOOK LIKE IN A POSTMARRIAGE CULTURE? Baptists think through the moral and ethical implications of the gospel in a way that reflects our president, Dr. Russell Moore’s vision of “convictional kindness.” This month we are tackling perhaps the most difficult cultural issue to face the church: marriage. We want to equip pastors and church leaders to answer the question: What does faithful, gospel-centered ministry look like in a post-marriage culture? Here are just a few samples from this issue: Russell Moore interviews Rosaria Butterfield, whose story of grace and redemption has encouraged many who often see the church as the enemy. Christopher Yuan shares his personal journey out of despair and gives a glimpse of what a faithful, celibate life looks like for a same-sex attracted Christian R. Albert Mohler, Jr., President of The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary, thinks through what the same-sex marriage revolution will mean for Christian higher education. Joy Allmond profiles San Francisco pastor Mike Goeke about his unique story and ministry to LGBT community. It is our desire that this issue becomes a resource for you and your church as you think through this difficult issue with compassion, conviction, and clarity. -daniel darling

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PERSPECTIVES

Reviews

BOOK REVIEWS The Accidental Feminist: Restoring Our Delight in God’s Good Design by COURTNEY REISSIG If you’re looking for something different than your run-ofthe-mill woman’s book, then this is the book for you. I’ve read a fair share of books that deal with womanhood, and this is one I wouldn’t hesitate to share across the different stages and seasons of a woman’s life. From single to seasoned in marriage, from empty nester to the empty arms that long for a child, this book takes what the Bible teaches about being a woman made in God’s image and works it out into the practical applications of daily life, w ithout elevating one season above another. Instead, it encourages women to be faithful where God has sovereignly placed them. I would encourage my friends to use this book as an essential tool in women’s discipleship. -ls

Fierce Convictions: The Extraordinary Life of Hannah More by KAREN SWALLOW PRIOR If you are inspired by the work of William Wilberforce and if the soundtrack of your experience with God is “Amazing Grace,” by the former slave ship owner John Newton, then you need to add Fierce Convictions to your must-reads. Karen Swallow Prior, in a way only she can, skillfully profiles the unknown heroine of abolition in England, Hannah More. Whereas Wilberforce worked tirelessly in Parliament, More's labors were less public, but no less important. As an influential thought leader, she deftly used her creative gifts and leveraged her considerable influence over the literary world. Her life was a tour-de-force of activism, literature and Christian ministry. And Dr. Prior weaves a tale that is hard to put down. -dd

The Original Jesus: Trading the Myths We Create for the Savior Who Is by DANIEL DARLING In this book, Dan Darling examines the sorts of alternative visions of Jesus so often presented within American church culture. He takes these models before the living Christ, as revealed in Scripture. And like Dagon of old, they fall apart before him, headfirst (1 Sam. 5:1-5). Darling is more than an idol-smasher, though. He points out in this book why each of these pictures of Jesus resonates with us. Sometimes it’s because there’s an element of truth in these pictures. Sometimes it’s because our picture of Jesus tells us what we’re afraid of, or how we’ve accommodated to the pattern of our ambient culture. In any case, he doesn’t leave us with critique. He takes us again and again to the cross, to the empty tomb, to the right hand of God. If we’re honest, we’re all too often disappointed—even angered—by the Jesus who is, when he replaces the Jesus we want. -rm

What Does the Bible Really Teach About Homosexuality? by KEVIN DEYOUNG In a day where self-professed “evangelicals” wish to recast the Bible’s teaching on sexuality in order to defuse the clash of biblical orthodoxy in today’s culture, Kevin DeYoung’s book is a much needed and accessible counterpunch to the malaise of biblical revisionism and rehashed liberalism. In it, DeYoung tackles the most basic, and most vital, questions surrounding the Bible’s teaching on homosexuality. Offering a condensed, yet comprehensive overview of biblical sexuality, he also responds and rebuts the popular but bankrupt arguments thrown out by today’s precocious millennials who wish to overturn the Bible’s culturally inconvenient teaching on sexuality. This is the book every pastor needs to buy in mass quantity and hand out freely to his congregation. -aw 6

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WHY WE’RE ALWAYS TALKING PAST EACH OTHER A REVIEW OF JONATHAN HAIDT’S THE RIGHTEOUS MIND: WHY GOOD PEOPLE ARE DIVIDED BY POLITICS AND RELIGION Trevin Wax

F IT SEEMS LIKE we are talking past one another too often in politics, the truth is, we usually are. Arguments that seem striking and self-evident to one side fall flat for the other, leaving the two sides no choice but to judge, claiming that their own failure to persuade must be due to the other side’s ignorance or (worse) sinister motives. Jonathan Haidt’s book, The Righteous Mind: Why Good People are Divided by Politics and Religion, offers three principles of moral psychology to help us understand why decent, upstanding neighbors and citizens can be so bitterly divided when it comes to religion and politics.

who share the same moral sensibilities. Haidt explains: “People bind themselves into political teams that share moral narratives. Once they accept a particular narrative, they become blind to alternative moral worlds” (xxiii). Haidt describes the liberal narrative as one of heroic liberation. Authority, hierarchy, power and tradition are chains that must be broken in order to set free the individual. Meanwhile, the conservative narrative is “heroism of defense,” where society is like a home that is being reclaimed from damage done by termites. Liberty is threatened, loyalty is declining, authority has been subverted and sanctity will disappear.

as your own. . . . Empathy is an antidote to righteousness, although it’s very difficult to empathize across a moral divide” (58). And how do we empathize? Because intuitions are first and strategic reasoning second, you have to speak to people’s moral intuitions. You have to “elicit new intuitions, not new rationales” (57).

APPLICATION FOR THE CHURCH

As a Christian, I don’t buy into Haidt’s evolutionary assumptions or his rejection of a universal morality that transcends culture. But I find aspects of his study of human morality that back up what Scripture teaches. In our sinfulness, we are all self-righteous, and our self-justifying ONE. INTUITIONS COME FIRST, hearts go into attack mode every time we STRATEGIC REASONING SECOND. SO HOW DO WE PERSUADE? feel threatened, criticized or condemned. Many of us think of morality as Given the fact that humans are experts The antidote to a “self-righteous mind” something we discover after rational and at spinning things to confirm what we must be a God-focused church that dereflective consideration. But Haidt says we already believe, how in the world can we livers the gospel of grace with the humiljudge first, and then we look for (or invent) have conversations about moral issues? ity of those who know the superior spirit arguments that back up our moral judg- How can a Christian ever expect to con- that’s so often seen in our own hearts. ments. Reason isn’t the determinative factor vince someone else of a biblical morality? If “new intuitions” matter just as in our moral considerations. Reason is the Haidt sees a powerful social element much as “new rationales,” then we need reinforcement for our moral intuitions. to our judgments. Social influence mat- to be part of a community where biblical ters. We care deeply about what other intuitions are created. We need to be a TWO. THERE’S MORE TO MORALITY people think, to the point we are willing loving community where the combinaTHAN HARM AND FAIRNESS. to adjust our beliefs or look for justifi- tion of empathy and the convictions of a Haidt compares our minds to a tongue cation for other perspectives in order to Christian perspective are on full display. with six taste receptors: liberty, loyalty, fall in line with what others are saying. The Righteous Mind is a secular psycholauthority, sanctity, harm and fairness. So persuasiveness in conversing about ogist’s take on human morality, but it’s a Politicians on the right tend to activate moral issues matters, but not for the rea- book that points in various ways to what more of the receptors, while politicians son you might think. “You can’t change the Bible says about the human condition. on the left focus on harm and fairness as people’s minds by utterly refuting their In the end, there’s hope. The gospel doesn’t the dominant moral considerations. arguments” (57). So, going into combat close down conversations between people mode is not likely to succeed. Instead, “if who disagree; it makes them possible. It THREE. MORALITY BINDS AND BLINDS. you really want to change someone’s mind diagnoses our self-righteous tendencies on a moral or political matter, you’ll need to and offers a breath of fresh humility into Once we’ve developed reasons for our see things from that person’s angle as well our polarized conversations. moral intuitions, we look for people ERLC. com

PERSPECTIVES

Point/Counterpoint

POINT/COUNTERPOINT

SIGNING CIVIL MARRIAGE LICENSES

BART BARBER: PROTECTING FAMILIES BY SIGNING CIVIL MARRIAGE LICENSES

F CHANGES IN AMERICAN marriage law make American churches rethink their practices surrounding weddings in order to make them more distinctively Christian, that will be a good thing. Those reforms, however, need not jettison the signing of civil marriage licenses by pastors. The government is involved in marriage because marriage relationships often present issues of interpersonal justice. Adjudicating matters of interpersonal justice is precisely the cause for which God ordained government. When marriage goes awry, the government can protect the rights of spouses and children by means of its coercive force in ways that churches simply cannot and should not do. We need government to be involved in the business of marriage. We must not hesitate to call the state when we credibly suspect abuse. Churches preach against abuse and should discipline abusers spiritually, but we also need the state to come alongside our spiritual discipline and effect physical discipline upon abusers. In like fashion, the spiritual aspects of marriage and the temporal legal aspects of marriage work in cooperation with one another. I do not always agree with what our state does in terms of family law, but that does not prevent me from recognizing our need for the state to intervene in family situations that demand coercive intervention, whether by jailing an abusive father or by enforcing spousal or child support upon a neglectful one. Because this protection is important, to eschew the signing of marriage licenses is either to deny those protections to spouses and children or to push those couples who are marrying into other arrangements. In some states like Texas, it may mean pushing couples into common-law marriages. Does it serve our purposes to lead couples out of an institution (statutory marriage) recently opened to same-sex liaisons and into an institution (common-law marriage) long associated with premarital cohabitation? Common-law marriage lines up with the Christian ideal of marriage no better than statutory marriage does. If not common-law marriage, it may mean pushing couples into the offices of their local Justices of the Peace, where they will obtain the same kind of marriage we refused to officiate. For the marrying couple, then, they would obtain either the exact same thing as if we had signed the license (statutory marriage by other means) or something less Christian (common-law marriage or no legal protection of spouses and children). The sole remaining reason to forego the signing of marriage licenses is to prevent pastors from serving as “agents of the state.” Some fear that being perceived as 8

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an agent of the state will be the camel’s nose under the tent by which the state will eventually coerce churches to bless same-sex unions. I think this fear is naïve and overly suspicious. It is overly suspicious because pastors have been discriminating over whom they will and will not marry for centuries (I won’t marry two Jews, two men, three Christians, two people who won’t attend premarital counseling), but no jurisprudence exists suggesting any move on the part of the state to clamp down on this form of discrimination. To begin to force pastors and churches to perform marriages to which they object would amount to a dramatic change in the landscape of American law. If such a dramatic change were to occur, it is naïve to think that a little objection like, “But I don’t sign marriage licenses,” would forestall it. To speak frankly, my church’s 501(c)(3) exemption probably exposes me to more entanglement with the state than does my signing of marriage licenses, but I don’t think many churches intend to relinquish that exemption until it proves to be absolutely necessary. I’m simply arguing that we should treat the signing of marriage licenses in the same way by waiting to discontinue our involvement in this aspect of American family law until the state forces us to do so.

PETER LEITHART: INTENSIFYING POLITICAL STRUGGLE

BY REFUSING TO SIGN CIVIL MARRIAGE LICENSES

ARLIER THIS YEAR, I signed a pledge stating that I will no longer sign state-issued marriage licenses when I perform a wedding. I will no longer declare the couple married “according to the laws of this state.” The reason is simple: What I do at a wedding and what the United States increasingly defines as marriage are radically different things, and I want to make the difference as clear as I can. I signed the pledge despite recognizing that some of the criticisms that have been lodged against this move are reasonable and possibly correct. Critics are definitely correct that refusing to sign licenses is inadequate, half a response or less. Critics may be correct that it will have little impact, and they may also be right that it’s premature. Some of the criticisms are laughably

wrong-headed, especially those who argue that refusing to sign marriage licenses is a retreat from the public square. My Southern friends assured me that my move was unnecessary since many Southern states have statutes and constitutional provisions defining marriage in Christian terms. They warned me that refusing to sign a license was illegal in Alabama, an act of civil disobedience. Then a federal court demanded that Alabama counties start issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples, and the state Supreme Court responded by ordering courts to uphold the Alabama Constitution and stop issuing marriage licenses. When the dust settled, I found myself in the good company of Alabama’s probate judges–all of us defying the non-law coming down from federal courts. None of us are signing marriage licenses. Taking a pledge is a small gesture, but gestures provoke and can galvanize. It’s a bit of political theater, but theater can shatter complacency. Political theatrics must be preceded and followed by principled and strategic discussion, but effective political theater raises the stakes and intensifies a political struggle. And intensity is what we need. American legal institutions have been rapidly redefining humanity’s oldest social relation, a relation God originally designed and still creates. Given the breathtaking hubris of federal redefinitions of marriage and the totalitarianism implicit in the Supreme Court’s decision in United States v. Windsor, discussion cannot go on forever. It must begin to give way to deeds.

BART BARBER is the senior pastor of First Baptist Church in Farmersville, Texas.

PETER LEITHART is the President of Theopolis Institute and an adjunct Senior Fellow of Theology at New St. Andrews College, Moscow, Idaho. ERLC. com

PERSPECTIVES

First Person

OUT FAR COUNTRY of a

A G AY S O N ’ S J O U R N E Y T O G O D

HAD A SECRET that I kept hidden through high school, college and even the Marine Corp Reserves. Then, when I entered graduate school, I no longer kept it a secret. I came out of the closet. I broke the news to my parents and told them, “I am gay.” The news devastated my mother, who was not a Christian at the time. She was confused and angry, but God used it to draw her to himself. Through a little pamphlet on homosexuality that shared the plan of salvation, she came to realize that if God can love her in spite of her sin, then she could love me, her son. Within a few months, my father became a Christian, as well. Meanwhile, I spent most of my free time in the gay clubs and began experimenting with drugs. Eventually, I supported my habit by selling drugs. I thought I could be a student by day and a drug dealer by night, but three months before I was to receive my doctorate, the administration expelled me. So I moved to Atlanta, Ga., 10

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Christopher Yuan

and became a supplier to other dealers in over a dozen states. In addition, it was nothing for me to have multiple anonymous sexual encounters each day. My parents didn’t know the details of my life, but they knew my greatest need was to make Jesus Christ my Lord. Along with more than hundred prayer warriors, my mother began to pray, “God do whatever it takes to bring this prodigal son to you.” In her desperation, my mom fasted every Monday for seven years and once fasted 39 days on my behalf.

AN ANSWERED PRAYER God answered her prayer the day I opened up my door to twelve federal drug enforcement agents, the Atlanta police, and two big German shepherd dogs. I had just received a large shipment of drugs and was charged with the street value equivalent to 9.1 tons of marijuana. With that amount, I was facing ten years to life in federal prison. I had started with a bright future among society’s finest in academia and I found myself in the ditch among society’s despised in Atlanta City Detention Center. I called home from jail, and my mother’s first words were, “Son, are you okay?” No condemnation, just unconditional love and grace. Romans 2:4 says, “God’s kindness leads us to repentance.” Even on that miserable day, God was pouring out his irresistible grace and drawing me to himself through the words of my mother. My mom was actually excited to get that call because I hadn’t called home in years, and she knew without a doubt that this was God’s answer to her prayers. Three days later, I found a Gideon’s New Testament on top of a heap of trash, which is what I felt like, and read through the Gospel of Mark. I started reading the Bible because I had an enormous amount of time on my hands. But a Bible is not just ink on paper. It is the very breath of God, sharper than any double-edged sword, and it exposed my sin.

OUR GOAL, AS CHRISTIANS, NO MATTER WHAT FEELINGS WE HAVE, MUST BE HOLINESS. A GRADUAL TRANSFORMATION My transformation was gradual. God was convicting me, but I didn’t want to let go of my sexual identity. I went through every verse and chapter of the Bible looking for the blessing of a monogamous gay relationship. I couldn’t find anything. I also realized that unconA couple of weeks later I was called ditional love is not the same thing as into the nurse’s office. They handcuffed me, chained my hands around my waist, unconditional approval of my behavior. and shackled my feet together. I shuffled My identity is not gay, ex-gay, or even in and knew something wasn’t right. She heterosexual for that matter, but my sole was uncomfortably struggling with the identity as a child of the living God must be in Jesus Christ alone. A decision had words to say and finally scribbled on a piece of paper: HIV+. The days after this to be made: either abandon God and diagnosis were dark and lonely. I was sen- pursue a gay relationship; or abandon tenced to six years, certainly much better pursuing a gay relationship—liberating than ten years to life, but the news of my myself from my same-sex desires—and live as a follower of Jesus Christ. My HIV status felt like a death sentence. Lying in my bed one night, I noticed decision was obvious. I chose God. I used to think that to please this among the profanity on the metal Christian God, I had to become bunk above me, “If you’re bored, read straight—I had to become heterosexJeremiah 29:11.” ual—but even those with heterosexual feelings still struggle with sin; that should “For I know the plans that not be the goal. Our goal, as Christians, I have for you,” declares the no matter what feelings we have, must Lord, “plans to prosper you and be holiness. As I began to live this life not to harm you, plans to give of surrender and obedience, God called you hope and a future.” me to full-time ministry while I was in At the most hopeless point in my life, prison of all places. God did another miracle too—he shortened my sentence God told me that regardless of who I from six years to three years, which is was and what I had done in the past, almost unheard of in the federal system. he still had a plan for me.

I was released from prison in July 2001, and I started school at Moody Bible Institute the very next month. I graduated from Moody in 2005 and went on to get my Master of Arts in biblical exegesis from Wheaton College Graduate School and recently received my Doctorate of Ministry from Bethel Seminary. I also had the immense honor of co-authoring a book with my mother called Out of a Far Country: A Gay Son’s Journey to God. A Broken Mother’s Search for Hope, and I am now back at Moody teaching in the Bible department. I went from prisoner to professor, how about that for a resume? Christian parents of LGBT or samesex attracted children often feel alone and sometimes racked with guilt. But, it’s not their fault. Perfect parenting does not guarantee perfect children. The job of Christian parents is not to produce godly children but to be godly parents, love their children, and point them to a life of costly discipleship. Without my parents living out the gospel in relationship with me, I would not be here. Church, let us come alongside our parents and our children—no matter what sin they’re struggling with—and point them to the lifegiving gospel of Jesus Christ. CHRISTOPHER YUAN is an author and teaches at Moody Bible Institute in Chicago, Illinois. ERLC. com

PERSPECTIVES

The ERLC Throughout the Years

1995 Led by former ERLC President Richard Land, the SBC adopts the “Resolution on Racial Reconciliation on the 150th Anniversary of the Southern Baptist Convention” by a nearly unanimous vote.

Above: (left to right) Gary Frost, Charles Carter and Richard Land at a press conference for the 1995 SBC racial reconciliation resolution. Right: Charles Colson speaks to the Christian Life Commission (ERLC) at the 1995 Annual Seminar in Wake Forest, North Carolina. Photos Courtesy of: Southern Baptist Historical Library and Archives, Nashville, Tennessee

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THE ERLC THROUGHOUT THE YEARS

Charles Colson on “The Struggle for the Soul of the Nation.”

“ . . . we can’t begin to understand the role of the church today, the war and crisis we face, unless we understand the kind of revolution that took place in this country three decades ago. For the first time in the history of the West, we rejected the idea that there is any truth that can be known either through God’s revelation or through reason. We went from the age of modernism to postmodernism. Camus, Sartre, and others the European intellectuals of the Sixties said there is no truth; there is nothing. Camus came to Columbia University; in a commencement address he said, ‘There is nothing.’ Since there is no God, one must overcome the nothingness of life, by one’s own historic effort. You overcome the nothingness by what you do and how you live. . . . radical individualism! Live for yourself. Tolerance is the ultimate virtue. There is no truth, all ideas are relative. This has become the dominant ethos in American life. Against that stands the Christian worldview. There is truth. It is knowable. God has spoken. As the church of Christ, we place a higher premium on truth than on tolerance. We say, ‘Yes, we want to be tolerant. Yes, we want to be loving, but not at the expense of truth.’ In today’s world where truth is in retreat, we have to be able to defend truth. The church exists not just for the fellowship, for the koinonia, not just for the preaching of the Word, not just for the discipline; the church exists to equip the laity to live their faith in the world, to equip every layperson to go to his or her neighbor with a cultural apologetic, a defense of why Christianity is so vital in society today.”

PREACHING LIKE JESUS TO THE LGBTQ COMMUNITY J.D. Greear JESUS’ MINISTRY WAS A PARADOX. THERE WAS NEVER ANYONE WHO SO EXALTED GOD’S STANDARDS OF RIGHTEOUSNESS. YET, THERE WAS NEVER ONE SO BELOVED BY THE OUTCASTS AND SOCIET Y’S SINNERS: THE PROSTITUTES, THE SEXUAL CAPTIVES AND TAX COLLECTORS. THE OPPRESSORS AND THE OPPRESSED, THE THIEVES AND VICTIMS ALL FLOCKED TO BE AROUND HIM. I believe John captured the heart of Jesus’ ministry in his description of Jesus in John 1:14: He was “full of grace and truth.” Truth without grace is fundamentalism. Grace without truth is sentimentality. One without the other is not Jesus. And when we are full of grace and truth like Jesus, we will attract the broken and repel those in power. I want to present nine propositions that will characterize the way a church “full of grace and truth” will approach this issue and can preach like Jesus to the LGBTQ community.

CHURCHES WILL BE KNOWN AS THE FRIENDS OF SINNERS. 1 JESUS-REPRESENTING

Our culture says we have two options in our relationship with the gay and lesbian community: affirmation or alienation. Jesus practiced neither. He told the truth about sin ( John 7:7), but then brought us close. He made us—sinners— his friends ( John 3:17). Are you friends to those in the LGBTQ community? Do they feel loved by your church? We have to love our gay neighbor more than we love our position on sexual morality, which means that our relationship with them is not contingent upon their agreeing with us about sexuality. Even if they continue to disagree with us, we must not push them away.

SEXUAL SIN SHOWS EXTREME IGNORANCE OF THE GOSPEL. 2 STIGMATIZING

Many of us are guilty of putting sexual sin into a different category than other sins. When we do this, we fail to grapple with our own sinfulness. As John Owen said, “The seed of every sin is in every human heart.” Those who recognize this about themselves speak with a deep humility and brokenness. Homosexuality does not send people to hell. How do I know that? Because God doesn’t take people to heaven for heterosexuality. He sends people to hell for self-rule and self-righteousness and for thinking that they can save themselves.

WE MUST POSITIVELY PUT FORWARD GOD’S DESIGNS FOR SEXUALITY, AND NOT MERELY CONDEMN ITS ABERRATIONS.

Those who wish to justify homosexuality often point out that Jesus never talked about it, but he did affirm the existing Jewish understanding of sexuality as revealed by Moses. In Paul’s day—when the prevailing sexual ethic was defined by absolute freedom, much like today—it was assumed the world had a loftier view of sex than believers. Paul presented the Christian vision (1 Cor. 6) as loftier, not lower. The church didn’t invent marriage. The state didn’t invent marriage. The Creator invented it. And we have to put forward his design for sex. ERLC. com

PERSPECTIVES

Application

OF THE KINGDOM BEGINS WITH 4 THEA CALLPREACHING TO REPENTANCE IN EVERY GENERATION.

Every generation develops basic assumptions about what is right and wrong. And no generation naturally gets these categories right. Coming to Jesus, therefore, means repentance: a surrender of our own standards and submitting to what he says. One of the worst condemnations of people in the Bible is that they “did what was right in their eyes.” We cannot trust our eyes, and we dare not “follow our hearts.” We must ask Jesus, not our hearts, to lead us forward.

GOD’S TRUTH IS TO 5 TOHATE;DISTORT TO SPEAK CLEARLY IS TO LOVE.

We commonly hear that it is hateful to teach that homosexuality is sin. But that logic can’t be true. Is it loving to avoid telling the truth because it makes a person feel bad? No. We don’t love the drug addict by simply resolving ourselves to his or her addiction. Love cares enough to stage the intervention.

WE CAN AND SHOULD PREACH THE POSSIBILITY OF SEXUAL ORIENTATION CHANGE BUT ACKNOWLEDGE THAT IT MAY NOT HAPPEN IN THIS LIFE.

In his Moral Vision of the New Testament, Richard Hays of Duke University applies the “already/not yet” dimension of the kingdom to sexual orientation change. Jesus has inaugurated his kingdom and has already infused certain elements of his power into the world, but many of Jesus’ ultimate healing works have not yet come. God will heal some broken sexual desires. But for others, he allows us to struggle as a testimony to his sustaining grace. John Newton, writer of “Amazing Grace,” said that God does this to remind us—until our dying breath—of our desperate need of the gospel. Likewise, Richard Hays says, “No one in Christ is locked into the past or into a psychological or biological determinism,” because Jesus put to death the old man and has started the process of the resurrection in us.

WE CANNOT TRUST OUR EYES, AND WE DARE NOT “FOLLOW OUR HEARTS.” PREACH THE MULTI-FACETED BEAUTY 7 WEOF THEMUSTGOSPEL TO DEAL WITH SEXUAL SIN.

Whenever Jesus dealt with someone in sexual sin, he always addressed root issues behind the sin. Jesus said to the adulterous woman in John 8:11, “Neither do I condemn you; go, and sin no more.” He did not tell her to change in order to be accepted, but to change because she had been accepted. Only the weightiness of God’s acceptance empowers us to forsake idolatry through a greater affection. Our message cannot simply be “Stop sexual sin,” but, “Behold your God!”

NOT BE THE FIRST GENERATION TO FOR CHRISTIAN CONFESSION. 8 WESUFFERWILLGREATLY

Holding to biblical teaching is unpopular and will increasingly be so. Are we prepared for rejection and persecution? Jesus considered John the Baptist the greatest prophet ever to live, and the world beheaded him.

ETHICS ARE NOT THE CENTER 9 SEXUAL OF CHRISTIANITY. THE GOSPEL IS.

Jesus’ central message was not instruction in sexual ethics; it was saving us from ourselves and from God’s wrath. Sexual mores were not the center of Jesus’ message, and so they should not be the center of our ministry. The cross and crown of Jesus are the center. He welcomed all manner of people struggling to figure out who he was into his presence, and he welcomes you as well. The key to becoming like the gospel is to saturate yourself in the gospel. We love because he first loved us. The more we know of his great love for us, the more love spills out of us toward others. The more you become aware of how far Jesus reached to save you, the more you overflow with grace toward those Jesus died to save. The cross models the way the church should respond to the LGBTQ community: not in condemnation but in sacrificial service.

J.D. GREEAR is the lead pastor of The Summit Church, in Raleigh-Durham, North Carolina. 14

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WOMEN’S R O U N D TA B L E

Talking to Your Children About Sex, Marriage and Same-Sex Marriage ROUNDTABLE CONTRIBUTORS J A N I O RT LU N D

is an author and the wife of Dr. Ray Ortlund Jr., pastor of Immanuel Church in Nashville, Tennessee. They have four grown children and a growing number of grandchildren.

KRISSIE INSERRA lives in Tallahassee, Florida, with her husband Dean and their three children.

hat age do you think is appropriate for addressing issues related to marriage, sex and same-sex marriage with your children? JO: You can begin talking about marriage and proper expressions of intimacy with your child from infancy on—by showing them pictures of your wedding day and other important weddings of family and friends; telling them how marriage began

STEPHANIE GOEKE

is a full-time wife, mother of three, and is actively involved in the ministry of First Baptist Church San Francisco.

T RILLIA NEWBELL serves at the ERLC and is married to Thern. They have two children.

in Gen. 1-2 and how good it is; displaying how much Dad and Mom love, admire and support in each other in their various roles; and making clear that God says marriage is between one man and one woman for as long as they both live. KI: I think the issue is more about maturity and exposure. My oldest son is eight years old and in second grade at our neighborhood public school. He

J E N A S TA R K E

lives in New York City with her husband, pastor of preaching at Apostles Church, and four children.

has classmates with lesbian parents, and he has seen men out in public holding hands. This has raised a number of questions from him, so we have already had discussions about marriage and sexuality. These issues might come up earlier with my four-year-old because of exposure. The important thing is to keep the lines of communication open. This is not a one-time “talk.” It is an ongoing, honest conversation. ERLC. com

PERSPECTIVES

Roundtable

marriage as God defines it. Make sure your child knows that this is not your idea that you are teaching but God’s idea from the beginning of the world until now. TN: I have young children (five and eight), so we have not jumped into the deep end of the pool on these topics. Thus far, we make sure to name body parts by their proper name so it’s not strange or awkward (as if God did not design our bodies). The kids understand that boys and girls are created by God with unique differences. SG: This really depends on your child and your child’s environment. While you want to guard against introducing sexuality and related issues to your children before they are emotionally and developmentally ready, it is an even greater risk in our culture and tech-driven world that your children will learn about sexuality from someone else. The goal should be that your kids’ first exposure to sexual information is from you, and that when questions and issues surface later down the road, they will be comfortable coming to you for counsel. JS: As parents, we know our kids best, and we should use wisdom as we consider when to have these discussions. Ask yourself: What is their social environment (friends, teachers, neighbors, advertising) teaching them? Have they begun asking questions? Am I reluctant to talk with my child just because it feels uncomfortable? How would you go about explaining samesex marriage to your children? How would you distinguish what God’s design is? JO: You can help children understand same-sex marriage by studying God’s design for marriage. Give them lots of stories about marriage from the Bible— from Creation to Revelation. I would tell them that same-sex marriage is not 16

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You can say something like, “Many people don’t know and believe the Bible, but in our family we want to study the Bible so we can know what God is saying to us about how life works best and how to honor him. In the Bible, God says that same-sex marriage is wrong, just like having sex outside of marriage, lying, stealing and worshipping other gods is wrong. Even if we don’t understand everything God is telling us in the Bible, we know that he is kind, wise and wants what is best for his children. So we will trust and obey his ways.”

design for all of creation. But because mankind is sinful and runs away from God, we want to make our own rules and not follow God’s design for us. The Bible tells us that ‘people loved the darkness rather than the light.’ In other words, we don’t want to be obedient to God’s commands, and sometimes this shows up in who people want to marry.” How would you help your children know the truth and yet not ostracize their neighbor or classmate with whom they disagree? JO: Do not let them hear you ostracize others for their beliefs. Let there be sympathy, grace and longing for those who don’t know the truth of the Bible yet. We don’t want to raise finger-pointing Pharisees or become people who point out or talk about other’s sins—we have enough of our own sin to deal with. Let’s love our friends with whom we disagree and emphasize that Jesus died for the sins of the world, ours included.

KI: We have simply explained that there are some men who choose to be with and marry other men and some women who do the same with women. This is not the way that God has created us to be. We assure our son that God has stated very clearly in the Bible that he made marriage If a someone asks, you can tell your child to be between a man and a woman, so this to share what he/she believes, and why: relationship is against God’s design. “Because the Bible is God’s Word to us, and in our family, we believe the Bible and SG: Explaining same-sex marriage and want to obey it.” Remind your children homosexuality to your children is easier that what God looks at is the heart; people if, and should be done after, you have who are living in a same-sex relationship taken the time to explain traditional need a new heart, just as people who marriage and biblical sexuality to your are having sex before marriage need one. children. This will aid greatly in helping Also, teach your children to pray for them. explain why homosexual expression and same-sex marriage are outside of God’s KI: Children see things in black and design, no matter what our culture or our white. They understand that some things laws may say. And, again, this is much are right and others are wrong and may easier if it is addressed by the parent, on have a hard time with those who want the parents’ initiative, rather than some- to blur the lines or completely disagree thing learned via media, teachers or peers. with them. It is important to show them how Jesus related to those who were in JS: I would say something like, “In Gen- sin. He felt compassion for them (Matt. esis, God created men and women to 9:36) and loved them in word and deed. complement one another. In his perfect plan, he made us different and proclaims it a good thing because it follows his

"WHEN OUR KIDS SEE TWO WOMEN HOLDING HANDS, WE SHOULD HELP THEM REMEMBER THAT JESUS CAME TO SET PEOPLE FREE FROM THEIR SIN, INCLUDING US." - J E N A S TA R K E

In our home, we are honest about these issues (in an age-appropriate way), but we stress that someone who is living this lifestyle needs to know and understand the love of Jesus. Trying to show them the reasons their choices are wrong is not going to convey that love. We must remember that our kids are taking their cues from us. If we are unloving toward those with sexual sin, we can expect our children to act the same way no matter how much we remind them to love others. SG: Teaching through Jesus’ interaction with sinners is a great way to show how Jesus was always full of mercy yet never wavered on the truth. Additionally, a great way to instill compassion toward those with whom we disagree is to listen to and understand more of their stories and how they ended up where they are, while helping our kids to understand how to allow Scripture to shine light on those experiences.

children to start responding by asking their classmate questions instead of throwing out accusations. It’s the child’s parents who are same-sex partners. The child shouldn’t be shunned because of the choice of the parents. Ultimately, I want my kids to be gospel-minded. I pray they would remember the truth of the gospel as they learn to relate to others and would have boldness to lovingly share when and where possible.

street holding hands, we should help them SG: Kids should first learn how to share their faith and to share the essence of remember that Jesus came to set people the gospel in the middle of their relafree from their sin, including us. tionships before they are taught, or even encouraged, to address sin or differences How would you train your child to talk of beliefs. Addressing sin without first about these things with friends who have introducing Jesus never goes well! same-sex parents? KI: Our son does have at least a couple of classmates who have same-sex parents, and this is a tough one. If the child wants to know what the Bible says about homosexuality, I would teach my child to point him or her to Scripture and explain it. But generally, that’s not the question that kids are asking. Children should never be ostracized or punished for the lifestyle choices their parents have made. They want to know that they are loved and accepted even though their family is different. They want to know that God has a plan for their life. They need to know that God must punish sin because he is a holy God, but his mercy and forgiveness extend from the east to the west. They simply need a friend.

For many kids, the “experience” of their friends can cause them to question what they have been taught about biblical sexuality and traditional marriage, so it is important that parents walk with their kids through the Word and allow it to illuminate the situation. Make sure your kids know that it is okay to be friends with these kids and that the same-sex parents may well be very nice, caring and capable parents. If the issue arises specifically in conversation, teach your children how to state their beliefs carefully and with sensitivity, and teach them how to affirm their friendship and sincerely love their friends.

JS: Our kids aren’t always going to say the right things, and we need to be patient JS: Sometimes our kids hear other kids with them. Most importantly, it’s crucial using bad language, and they naturally for them to understand that behavior is want to label them “bad kids.” We remind the fruit of what’s in our hearts. It should them that our sins—lying, bad attitudes, surprise them less and less that people laziness, hatefulness—are just as “bad,” TN: I’d want my kids to be honest. I and we need forgiveness just as much as don’t want them to feel they need to hide disobey God’s commands if they don’t they do. Jesus spent time with people who their Christianity. With that said, I would have Jesus in their heart. Our neighbors need to know Jesus before they’ll want want them to be wise and discerning. I did a lot of bad things and loved them. to obey his commands. As kids grow in When we separate ourselves from other want them to learn to share an opinion, concern or conviction when asked their knowledge of the gospel and how people, we are saying we don’t need as God changes hearts, they’ll better relate much forgiveness as they do. So, when our rather than voluntarily. For example, if a classmate is sharing, I might teach my to their friends, family and neighbors. kids see two women walking down the ERLC. com

SPOTLIGHT

From Captivity to Freedom

FROM CAPTIVITY TO FREEDOM A Pastor’s Struggle with Homosexuality and His Journey Home

S A YOUNG CHILD growing up in Texas, Mike Goeke knew he was different from other little boys. “Most of my friends were girls, and I was not interested in boy things. I was very uncomfortable in the world of boys,” Goeke said. “I had a clear sense of feeling very different and struggling with my identity at an early age.” Other kids sensed a difference in him, too. They often made fun of him. As Goeke entered middle and then high school, he found the social scene more difficult to navigate. When he was in the sixth grade, another boy at the Christian school he attended called him a “f*g.” He had lived such a sheltered life that he didn’t know what that word meant until a year later. 18

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“I grew up in a good family, a strong Christian home. My dad was a good, gracious man—except with regard to homosexuality,” Goeke said. “And I was afraid of what that meant for me.” So Goeke kept his struggle with samesex attraction a secret. Throughout high school he dated a lot. “This was primarily because I was so comfortable with girls,” he explained. “But I used Christianity as an excuse not to physically engage with them.” Not much changed when he attended Baylor University. He continued the excessive dating and joined a fraternity, still not acting out on his same-sex attraction. But the rumors came amid propositions from other men.

by Joy Allmond

“People seemed to know what I was thinking, and these rumors confirmed my fears,” he said. Goeke met his wife, Stephanie, who also attended Baylor, through mutual friends. Looking back, he says there was no sexual attraction. But they had a lot in common, so he dated her. He also had a desire for commitment. “I thought marriage would change me,” he said. So in 1994, he and Stephanie were married. Two years into their marriage, the Internet was gaining ground, and AOL chat rooms became increasingly popular. It was there that Goeke discovered a world he did not know existed. Still content to keep his Photography by Sarah Pastrana

fantasies private, he started engaging in gay chat rooms. “It was different from what I thought it would be—it wasn’t the freakish world I had imagined. Many of these people were professing Christians,” Goeke recalled. “Some of them were even married men. And then there were men who decided to divorce so they could pursue homosexuality.” During that time, he was struggling in his marriage—especially with the physical component. Goeke, feeling crushed beneath the weight of his sexual identity crisis and the strained relationship with his wife, spiraled into depression. And the validation he received from the gay chat rooms, along with his troubled marriage, gave him the impetus to explore gay-affirming theology. “My Christianity had always been the thing that brought me the greatest fear about my same-sex attraction. But when I began talking to people in gay-affirming churches, they would tell me that my fear was wrong, that God didn’t care if I was gay,” he explained. Goeke began to explore gay-affirming Christianity. “I found very little hope from anything else,” he said. “From the orthodox Christian perspective, most of what I found were statements like, ‘It is wrong,’ or ‘It is sin.’ There was nothing redemptive or helpful for me.” The fodder from the chat rooms and his pursuit of gay-affirming theology gave Goeke the boldness to leave his wife. He left a letter for her, explaining his struggle—something she knew nothing about. They would remain separated for several months. During their separation, he continued to seek validation from gayaffirming churches. “This was very enticing to someone struggling with something that, historically, had not been addressed in

“I PRAYED MY WHOLE LIFE. AND I KNEW THE BIBLE. AND DESPITE ALL THOSE THINGS, THE FEELINGS DID NOT GO AWAY.” the church,” he said. “There were no opportunities—in my experience— for me to say, ‘I am struggling. I don’t want this. What do I do?’ I was not able to bring my experience into the light of Scripture.” The church at that point, he said, had spent a lot of time talking about the cause of homosexuality and how to stop it. Much of the church’s causality of homosexuality was rooted in fatherlessness and abuse—things that were not a part of Goeke’s childhood. “This causality did not apply to me; I grew up in a loving, Christian household. The church’s answer—which was to pray, or ‘stop doing that’—did not fit my experience,” he explained. “I had been praying since the seventh grade for God to change me. So in my mind, I prayed my whole life. And I knew the Bible. And despite all those things, the feelings did not go away.”

At that point Goeke began to do what he believes that many who struggle with same-sex attraction do: He redefined his understanding of theology and Scripture based on his experience. “I came to the conclusion that since I felt this way my whole life, God must be okay with this. And that theology just affirmed that for me,” he said. “But there was not a full picture of the gospel, of discipleship, of sin, of surrender or of the reality of brokenness. My faith became a powerless part of my life.”

TURNING POINT During Goeke’s marital separation and pursuit of gay-affirming theology, his parents pursued him fervently. He wanted nothing to do with them, but he agreed to visit them for Easter. During the visit, his dad gave him two books. Goeke hesitantly took the books, fearing that they were—

Mike Goeke, a pastor in San Francisco, uses the story of God's redemption in his life to minister to his community.

ERLC. com

SPOTLIGHT

From Captivity to Freedom

in his words—“right-wing Christian propaganda.” One of those books was a series of letters between a man who had left homosexuality and his friend who was struggling in that world. “That book connected with me for a couple of reasons. First, the guy [who had left homosexuality] spoke to every argument I had. What he said resonated with me in a way that nothing else said by my family, my friends or anything I read had. And I was riveted by that.” More importantly, the correspondent who left homosexuality painted a picture of Jesus that was vastly different than what Goeke experienced. “My picture of Jesus was always a kids’ Bible Jesus—a benign, powerless figure. But the picture of Jesus that I saw through reading that book was a dirty, rugged Jesus—a Jesus in the trenches with me,” he recalled. “It was a Jesus who loved and accepted me as I was but loved me too much to leave me there.” At that point, Goeke was prompted to make an attempt to reconcile his marriage and asked his wife if he could come home. Like his parents, Stephanie had been working hard to try to get him home. And God had been working on her heart during their separation. Her response to his question was: “You may have entered this marriage under false pretenses, but I did not. I sought the Lord and feel like you are the man I was supposed to marry.” He moved home, and the Goekes began an arduous journey to personal restoration and to rebuild their marriage. “Our marriage was basically rebuilt from scratch. It was hard but incredibly 20

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fruitful,” he said. “[God] did something in us that is far better than I would have imagined. It’s been a difficult journey, but I would never trade the level of intimacy we have because of what we have dealt with.” As for his personal restoration, it went much deeper than changing a behavior. “Nothing changed over night,” he said. “The opposite of homosexuality is not heterosexuality—it is holiness. Ultimately, I just surrendered.”

THE IMPORTANCE OF A MENTOR As Goeke began the nearly two-year process to restore his marriage, he realized he needed some accountability aside from his wife. He remembered a Bible study leader from the days before he left Stephanie. The leader had left such an impression on Goeke that he sought him out for a mentorship. This mentor just happened to be a licensed Christian counselor. “I knew I could trust him. I met with him, told him everything and asked him to help me,” Goeke said. “And he said, ‘Yes, but you have to put aside everything you have heard about your struggles—even what you have heard from Christians—and let God illuminate your world with his word.’ No one had ever walked me through the Word the way he did.” As Goeke’s mentor showed him the truths of Scripture, he stopped basing his understanding of God and of Scripture through the lens of his own feelings and experiences.

FROM RESTORATION TO MINISTRY Today, Goeke is a pastor of First Baptist Church—a Southern Baptist church—in San Francisco, where he lives with Stephanie and their three children. “Through my restoration process, I went back to the SBC because they have held fast to Scripture in a way

Mike and his wife, Stephanie, have been married for 21 years.

that is profound. I knew I needed teaching I could trust,” he said. Not surprisingly, much of his ministry work involves married couples where one person struggles with same-sex attraction. But he wants to go beyond helping the struggling individual. “I want to help local churches understand the gay community better, and I want to help the church to know how to speak toward this issue and to see this community the way God sees them,” he said. “Ultimately, my desire is for people to know Jesus—the real Jesus. And there is a desperate need for the gospel.” He also has a message to those who feel trapped by same-sex attraction and fear that a homosexual identity has permanently marked them: “God’s Word is designed to shine a light on your experience. And God’s Word and the power of the cross are for changed lives. “My identity in Christ has nothing to do with sexuality. I do not claim a heterosexual or a homosexual identity. I claim the identity of a child of God. And he has enabled me to live the life he has called me to live with joy.” JOY ALLMOND is a writer and editor for the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association.

S E C RE T T H O U G H T S O F A N U N LI K ELY CO N V ERT Russell Moore and Rosaria Butterfield

RUSSELL MOORE: What do evangelical Christians just not get about the LGBT community? ROSARIA BUTTERFIELD: One of the first things that I firmly believe you don’t get is that, in all of your encounters, you will meet and know and love people whose original sin has left the thumbprint of unwanted homosexual desire. People are not different; original sin is the great leveling playing field. Without meaning to, you are presuming—without even knowing the people with whom you are speaking—that they need to be fixed and fixed up in a specific way. So one of the first things that we could commit ourselves to doing is to being a community of believers who share the gift of repentance unto life in a way that other people can see. When I was in the gay community, somebody’s home was open for fellowship or food or to stand between you and that awful pit of loneliness. Everybody knew there was a place to go. From my experience, the church is living on a starvation diet of community. I can’t live like that. And maybe the people you are witnessing to are put off because they don’t want to live like this either. MOORE: What do you think the LGBT community does not understand about evangelical Christians?

BUTTERFIELD: I think it would be impossible for anyone apart from the bounded system of the Christian church to know anything about the means of grace. They are a part of the great spiritual inheritance of being a child of the living God, but those means of grace are often privatized. Wouldn’t it be amazing if all of your unsaved neighbors actually knew that church membership was a vital life-giving gift to you? They know if you have a snow blower, if you have a kid who’s going to rake some leaves. What if they actually knew something about what it means to be a Bible-believing Christian today? When you step into someone’s life with a cup of the cold water that they need, no one is going to disagree with you. There is great need, and people’s lives are filled with gospel bridges. ERLC. com

SPOTLIGHT

Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert

MOORE: In the Baptist tradition, we have had testimonies, people talking about what the Lord has done in their lives. I’ve seen that go badly so many times. They would become a competition or end with, “Now everything is great, and I’ve left all of that behind.” But in your book, you talk about how difficult it was to leave your community. Why? BUTTERFIELD: I too have struggled with these testimonies that make it seem the point of the Christian life is to just be confident unto yourself—that the point of the Christian life is to have all of your problems solved so that your strength is in you. Not only is that annoying, that is heretical—right? There are countless self-help programs that promise to do it without the blood. But we know that our hope is in the risen Christ and that it is not in ourselves that we stand, but in a daily dependence upon Christ. Common grace is a wonderful thing and bestowed upon everyone. In my experience, my gay and lesbian community was a place filled with common grace. I was in serially monogamous lesbian relationships for a decade in the 1990s, during, in some ways, the heyday of AIDS. I learned the hospitality gifts that I use today as a pastor’s wife in my gay and lesbian community because when you are regularly burying people from an illness that you do not understand, you learn a central Christian gift—standing with the disempowered. You learn how to accompany people in suffering, and those are good and Christ-like things to learn and qualities to have. When I started reading the Bible, it was in order to write a book on the religious right from a lesbian-feminist perspective. In addition to that, I’m an English professor. I’m a “whole book” specialist, and my job is to make sure that the parts make up the whole. It was absolutely hermeneutically

CHURCH CULTURE WAS FAIRLY EASY FOR ME TO DISPENSE WITH. I DIDN’T FIT IN; THEY WEREN’T MY KIND OF PEOPLE. BUT WHAT I COULD NOT DISMISS WAS THE RISEN CHRIST.

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shocking to me to discover that the Bible was a unified biblical revelation. I was blown away by the democratization of original sin and the free gift of the gospel. My total undoing was to realize that I had thought I was on the side of righteousness and goodness, and not only was it Jesus I had been persecuting the whole time, but it was my Jesus, my prophet, my priest, my Savior, my king and my friend. I don’t know how else to say it except that the pastor the Lord used in my conversion was my neighbor and my friend. We opened the Word together because I was trying to critique it, and he was more than happy to help me keep reading it. I was using him, and perhaps he was using me. But I never felt like a project. Ken Smith always realized that the big sin in my life was unbelief. Everything else would get worked out in the wash. MOORE: You talk about going to Ken Smith’s home and being there with his family. You were vegan at the time and had environmental concerns about air conditioning. Ken would shut

off the air conditioning and fed you the sort of food that you would eat and loved you. He was so Christ-like in that way. BUTTERFIELD: Ken Smith is a wonderful, godly example of an ordinary Christian. When I first met Ken, I had written an editorial against Promise Keepers. One of Ken’s elders read it and told him he needed to shut up this woman. Ken apparently said, “Oh, my wife and I should invite her over for dinner.” Ken realized my orientation was a soul orientation, and I needed to understand that. But the other thing that Ken was so good at is that he realized that he also needed to listen, and he needed to know where I was coming from and some of the values that I had and what my ethics were, what I cared about. At that first dinner, I met someone who was as committed to community as I am, as committed to hospitality as I am, someone for whom conversations about sexuality and politics didn’t send him under the chair. He also did two very important things at that first meeting: he actually did not share the gospel with me, and he did not invite me to church. And because of those two omissions, I really trusted him. So began a two-year conversation where things didn’t look so good. It’s not like I dropped to my knees and said the Sinner’s Prayer in a week’s time. We had very hefty conversations but always very loving. We always started and ended with prayer, and Ken’s house was as crazy as my house. That door kept opening, and all kinds of people walked through it. His home became a vital place of thinking and learning. It was organic, unsafe, testy, and ultimately, life-giving. MOORE: You confess in your book to having been a church stalker. I think that narrative is one that is absolutely essential for everyone of us in ministry to understand and to know. Why don’t you tell us what we are talking about?

BUTTERFIELD: As I was reading through the Bible and learning from Ken about repentance unto life, I was really intrigued to know who in the world would get up in the morning and go to church. So I would go and get my Starbucks coffee and my New York Times and park my little red truck—with bumper stickers that would scare you— across the street from the church. I would watch these enormous families pour out of these 15-person passenger vans, which I thought were for handymen. I was really interested in what went on in that building, but I thought there was simply no way I could walk across the street. MOORE: How long did it take for you to observe this and wonder, could I ever be one of these people? BUTTERFIELD: Church culture was fairly easy for me to dispense with. I didn’t fit in; they weren’t my kind of people. But what I could not dismiss was the risen Christ. I could not dismiss the fact that all of the things that I valued as a social activist, Jesus valued. He solved it very differently than I did, but we started with the same question. I also discovered that I had some colleagues who went to this church. I was intrigued at the way they would talk about the sermon throughout the week. They were interpolating the Bible with their life, actually living within God’s story and within God’s ontology. So, I got up one morning and left the bed I shared with my lesbian partner and an hour later sat in a pew at the Syracuse Reformed Presbyterian Church. I felt strongly that I needed to go there to meet God, not to fit in. MOORE: There is an entire group of people who are wondering, in the way that you were, asking what would it look like for me if I were actually in that community? I think sometimes we miss that. BUTTERFIELD: My reading of the Bible tells me that before the foundations of the world, people have been set apart by a holy God, and those people are in all nations and communities, including the LGBT community. We are not only arrogant, but we are theologically vapid when we believe that we know who those people are. We cannot tell the difference between a wolf in sheep’s clothing and a lost sheep unless you are close enough to have a real conversation. In order to be close enough to put the hands of the hurting into the hand of the Savior, you have to be close enough to get hurt yourself. MOORE: When you came to Christ, were you in a relationship at the time? ERLC. com

SPOTLIGHT

Secret Thoughts of an Unlikely Convert

BUTTERFIELD: We had broken up. When I’m working on a book, I’m no fun. All you get to hear about is my book, and for this book, I was reading the Bible. I was on a research leave, and I was reading the Bible about five hours a day. The Holy Spirit has a lot of opportunity to shake up your worlds when you are spending that much time with him. So my community had been hearing about the Bible, and many people in my community had met Ken Smith. One of the things that happened when I came to faith was Ken and Floy said, “Now that you are a new baby Christian and on the front line of a culture war, you need to be a member of the church.” And I thought, “Whoa! I like this me-and-Jesus stuff. No to those people with that 15-person passenger van.” But they said, “You are a soldier, and Jesus doesn’t send you out all by yourself because you’ll get killed.” They worked with me right where I was—in the middle of teaching classes in feminist theory and queer theology. I didn’t have time to clean up my professional life, but Ken said, “The church needs to help you, right now, in the situation you’re in. Will you please study what I’m telling you about?” They had patience and knew that it was going to be messy and difficult, and maybe embarrassing. But, we’ve spent too much time trying to be all cleaned up as Christians. I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but it hasn’t worked. So let’s try broken. MOORE: I recently realized that those outside the church may hear “broken” and think “done—to be disposed of.” We understand that brokenness is a good thing. It is vulnerability God uses. I wonder how many people are in a situation like yours but don’t have the sort of resources you did. Do they wonder, am I really too far gone to even have this conversation about the gospel? BUTTERFIELD: Well, if anyone is too far gone, everyone is too far gone, right? When you say, “I’m broken,” you give people the opportunity to look into the window of your life to see the way the Lord puts together those pieces. And I’ll tell you what resources are: you are resources. You have unsaved neighbors God gave you by design. There is no reason on this planet that anyone would lack the resource of a godly neighbor. The Lord intends ordinary means of grace to be the means by which people are saved. Those ordinary means include you in your limitations. MOORE: In your book you wrote, “In understanding myself as a sexual being, responding to Jesus meant not going backwards to my heterosexual past, but going forward to something entirely new.” What do you mean by that? 24

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THE GOSPEL'S UNDERSTANDING OF SEXUALITY IS THE BEST KEPT SECRET ON THE PLANET, SADLY EVEN AMONG CHRISTIANS. BUTTERFIELD: The gospel’s understanding of sexuality is the best kept secret on the planet, sadly even among Christians. When we as Christians call one another to sexual holiness, we are not saying that the answer is heterosexual marriage. We acknowledge that marriage is by God’s design, but also that not everyone is designed for marriage. When we talk about chastity or dealing with your sexual temptations, we are not talking about repression or slapping of hands. We are talking about acknowledging and loving the image of God in someone else deeply enough to be sacrificial with what you want. I still pray daily, “Lord, how has original sin distorted me, and how is indwelling sin manipulating me?” I am no different now than then. You are no different than I am. If we could share those questions instead of pretending that we are all cleaned up, we might have a powerful witness for what the gospel can do in a sexually broken world. MOORE: So, you are not saying to the person who is looking, “You will become a Christian, and then you will be a pastor’s wife.” That’s how your story played out, but there are all sorts of other stories. BUTTERFIELD: I have very good single friends who struggle with all levels of sin, as we all do, and hang out with me to watch the way I live. We have to be very careful to stop interfering with God’s call for people’s lives and to stop viewing single people as people who need to be fixed or to be fixed up. We need to repent of all the gay jokes we’ve told and all the hardness of heart that we have established. The sooner we do that, the better, because what makes us safe to one another is repentance unto life. I truly believe that people who are struggling with unwanted homosexual desire would find your community and your conversation safe if they could also see you acknowledge that we daily need the Lord—repentance is only unto the risen Christ. ROSARIA BUTTERFIELD is an author, a full-time mother and pastor's wife, and a former tenured professor of English at Syracuse University.

SPOTLIGHT

Same-Sex Marriage and Christian Higher Education

SA SA M ME E EE S SE EX X M MA AR RR R II AG AG E E A AN ND D C CH HR R II S ST T II A AN N H H II G GH HE ER R E ED DU UC C AT AT II O ON N By By R R .. Al Al b be e rr tt Mo Mo h h ll e e r, r, Jr. Jr.

SA M E E S E CHRISTIAN

By R We are living in the midst of an unprecedented sexual revolution, one that presents particular challenges to Christians and those committed to religious liberty. British theologian Theo Hobson has observed that there can be no third way for the Christian church on the issue of homosexuality. Churches will either affirm the legitimacy of same-sex relationships and behaviors or they will not. According to Hobson, the sheer speed of this revolutionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s success, its ability to paint those who will not join it as morally deficient and intolerant, and its power to completely turn the moral tables threaten to shake the very foundations of the Christian church. But the Christian church is not the only institution the sexual revolution has in its crosshairs. Christian higher education is also under tremendous pressure. The religious liberty challenge we now face places every religious educational institution in the arena of conflict where erotic liberty and religious liberty now clash. Marc D. Stern of the American Jewish Congress, for example, has aptly recognized the challenge same-sex marriage would represent in regard to American religious liberty on the campuses of religious colleges. He sees the work of religious institutions as inevitable arenas of legal conflict. This threat, of course, poses no danger to theological liberals and their churches and educational institutions because those churches have accommodated themselves to the new morality and find themselves quite comfortable within the context of the new moral regime. But faithful Christian colleges and universities will face the immediate threat of being further marginalized in the larger culture. Some will be threatened Illustration by Jeremy Booth

with the denial of accreditation and labeled outlaws simply because they remain true to historic Christian conviction and biblical orthodoxy. Many religious institutions, especially colleges and schools, are now regularly confronted by the demand to surrender to the sexual revolution with regard to nondiscrimination on the basis of sex, sexual behavior and sexual orientation pertaining to admissions, the hiring of faculty and student housing. In some jurisdictions, lawmakers are contemplating hate crime legislation that would marginalize and criminalize speech that is in conflict with the new moral consensus. Furthermore, colleges and schools have been challenged concerning their own internal policies and student

discipline when it comes to the application of convictional moral principles in the lives of students. For that matter, the courts are soon to see an avalanche of cases related to employees in these schools that challenge the rights of Christian and other religious organizations to hire and fire on the basis of religious principles and teachings. Yet the law is not the only instrument of legal coercion. Coercion can come in regulations undertaken by voluntary associations, as these generally follow the lead set by legislators. Religious colleges and universities participating in intercollegiate athletics are likely soon to discover that groups such as the NCAA will come under pressure to exclude any institution that discriminates on sexual

ERLC. com

SEEMAS SPOTLIGHT Same-Sex Marriage and Christian Higher Education AITSIRHC yB orientation from participation. Accrediting agencies, some of which have long struggled to accommodate Christian institutions within their existing nondiscrimination policies, will come under increased pressure to eliminate from membership any school that discriminates in any way on the basis of sexual orientation in the admission of students, the discipline of students, student housing, and the hiring of faculty. Ominously, one respected Christian college, Gordon College near Boston, Mass., has been officially notified of a review by its accrediting agency (the New England Association of Schools and Colleges’ Commission on Institutions of Higher Education) over this very issue. Other schools are soon to receive the same kind of scrutiny. As the sexual revolution completely pervades the society, and as the issues raised by the efforts of gay liberation and the legalization of same-sex marriage come to the fore, Christians now face an array of religious liberty challenges that were inconceivable in previous generations. Nowhere is this more evident than the

challenge presented to us by the transgender revolutionaries. Recent controversies at California Baptist University and Azusa Pacific University demonstrate the vexing dimensions to this challenge. In the case of Azusa Pacific University, a female professor and former chairman of the theology department announced her intention to become a man. She was shocked when the Christian university found her announcement incompatible with its moral code. Just a few days later, California Baptist University in Riverside made national headlines when the school discovered that a male student had appeared in the media claiming a new identity as a young transgender woman. Given California law and the government’s nondiscrimination policies, both institutions needed to play legal defense. Furthermore, both schools are accredited by regional agencies that have their own nondiscrimination policies. The transgender revolution poses a unique set of challenges related to admission, hiring and housing for schools. Of course, these challenges will only escalate as the transgender revolution escalates.

EROTIC LIBERTY NOW MARGINALIZES, SUBVERTS AND NEUTRALIZES RELIGIOUS LIBERTY— EVEN ON THE CAMPUSES OF AMERICA’S CHRISTIAN COLLEGES AND SCHOOLS. We now face an inevitable conflict of liberties. In this context of acute and radical moral change, the conflict of liberties is excruciating, immense and eminent. In this case, the conflict of liberties means that the new moral regime, with the backing of the courts and the regulatory state, will prioritize erotic liberty over religious liberty. Erotic liberty has been elevated as a right more fundamental than religious liberty. Erotic liberty now marginalizes, subverts and neutralizes religious liberty—even on the campuses of America’s Christian colleges and schools. The new moral revolution is seriously threatening the religious liberty of these schools and their right to be Christian. Religious schools are in the conflict whether they like it or not. If they are going to survive, they are going to have to stand. They are going to have to stand on the same authority that faithful, orthodox Christians have been standing on for the last 2,000 years. They are going to have to stand with conviction, courage and compassion as they speak truth in a world that wants them silenced. R. ALBERT MOHLER, JR. is the President of The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary in Louisville, Kentucky.

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SPOTLIGHT

Marriage Is.

MARRIAGE IS. HOW MARRIAGE TRANSFORMS SOCIETY AND CULTIVATES HUMAN FLOURISHING

An Excerpt from the book Marriage Is. by Andrew Walker & Eric Teetsel 30

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N THE BIBLE, THE ethics that undergird marriage are rooted in creation (Gen. 2:24), which means that they’re designed for all persons, regardless of whether all persons become Christians or not. Of course, marriage finds its fulfillment in Christ (Eph. 5:22-33), but marriage is designed such that all who enter it can prosper from it. So, it’s technically impossible for the church to “get out of the marriage business” because Christian theology and ethics won’t allow for it. And secondly, it can’t be considered loving to sit idly by as the very foundation of society is redefined.

Arguing against same-sex marriage can easily put you on the losing side of the culture wars. Some think that if we “give a little” or “compromise” on marriage, we won’t set up obstacles for reaching people for Christ. But arguing for biblical marriage and its application to broader society will always put you on the side of truth. But if Christians insist on a definition of marriage, why must the government recognize it? The government is not in the business of upholding theological positions or propagating sectarian ethics, we’ll admit that. But government is in the business of upholding certain public truths. The government forbids stealing, for example, not simply because the Ten Commandments forbids it, but because stealing violates the public trust. Because stealing undermines cooperation and a well-ordered civil society, common belief about the harms of theft leads to outlawing it. Of course, as evangelicals, we believe all truth has God as its author, and so we view stealing as breaking God’s commandment. But that is not government’s interest in making theft illegal. While marriage may be ultimately Christian, it’s not exclusively Christian. Arguments that conflate theological meaning with direct public application ignore this division and treat a theology of marriage as akin to a theology of baptism. How a church administers

MARRIAGE IS. Andrew Walker & Eric Teetsel (Nashville: B&H, 2015)

baptism, however, is a church ordinance where the church marks out its members. The same cannot be said about marriage. It is entirely permissible for the government to uphold a view of

As Christians, we understand that marriage reflects the deepest truths of the gospel. As Christians in America, we also understand that government has an interest in promoting marriage as a social

AS CHRISTIANS IN AMERICA, WE ALSO UNDERSTAND THAT GOVERNMENT HAS AN INTEREST IN PROMOTING MARRIAGE AS A SOCIAL GOOD REGARDLESS OF THEOLOGICAL ORIGIN. marriage that aligns with theological truth, but that is not held or promoted for theological reasons. When we speak of marriage as only a theological construct, we do a disservice to the institution’s public significance. There aren’t two kinds of marriage—one secular, one sacred. There’s only one marriage with one purpose, regardless of how different religious traditions handle or interpret the institution. Government does not uphold a particular theological interpretation of marriage; it upholds a view of marriage that differing theological and non-theological systems rightly accommodate. That’s why civilizations across human history—some of them not religious at all—have acknowledged marriage.

good regardless of theological origin. The fact remains: Marriage simply cannot be privatized. When the church declines to speak the truth about marriage, it invites competing and false views that rob marriage of its purpose. Were the church to “get out of the marriage business” as some are tempted, two mistakes will follow. First, the church will allow a false understanding of marriage to dominate the public square. Second, the church will becomes a secularized version of itself. Christians long ago insisted that a culture of no-fault divorce would not affect Christian marriages. But today, we’re all too familiar with the testimonies of scarred Christians who have endured divorce. The reality of divorce within the church bears out this truth: If the church is not holding fast to the truth of marriage, it will bend and accommodate itself to the dominant marriage ideology of the public square. ANDREW WALKER serves the ERLC as Director of Policy Studies. ERIC TEETSEL directs the Manhattan Declaration, a national movement of Christians for life, marriage and religious freedom. ERLC. com

EQUIP

Q&A WITH SAM ALLBERRY

VIDEO How to Care for Your Gay Neighbor Rosaria Butterfield with Lindsay Swartz

Marriage in Crisis: The Conflict Between Sexual Freedom and Religious Liberty Ryan T. Anderson

How should Christians explain same-sex attraction to their children?

How to Preach About Homosexuality in a Post-Christian Context Dean Inserra with Dan Darling

How do we love those who disagree with us on the issue of same-sex attraction? What does discipleship look like for a newly converted gay or lesbian believer?

BOOKS Out of a Far Country: A Gay Son's Journey to God. A Broken Mother's Search for Hope. Christopher Yuan and Angela Yuan

Loving My (LGBT) Neighbor: Being Friends in Grace and Truth Glenn T. Stanton

Same-Sex marriage: A Thoughtful Approach to God's Design for Marriage Sean McDowell and John Stonestreet

What Does the Bible Really Teach About Homosexuality? Kevin DeYoung

WaterBrook Press, 2011

Baker Books, 2014

Is God Anti-Gay? Sam Allberry

The Good Book Company, 2013

Moody Publishers, 2014

Crossway, 2015

marriage is How Marriage Transforms Society and Cultivates Human Flourishing

andrew t. walker & eric teetsel

Marriage Is. Andrew Walker and Eric Teetsel B&H, 2015

Articles, Podcasts and more at ERLC.com/equip 32

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JANUARY 21-22, 2016 WASHINGTON DC Join the ERLC and Focus on the Family as we host the first ever major pro-life conference for evangelicals in conjunction with the March for Life. Evangelicals from across the country will gather in Washington DC to be inspired and equipped by top speakers. Every life is valuable because every life is made in the image of God.

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EVANGELICALS.LIFE 33 ERLC. com

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