MARCH 6-12 2011
M(ad) Women
Wh t d What do our advertisements d ti t really say about the Pakistani woman?.
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Who’s Better, Who’s Best 28
Not A Fairytale 32
FEATURE
REVIEWS
COMMENT
PEOPLE
HOROSCOPE
MARCH 6-12 2011
Cover Story 22 M(ad) Women Does Pakistani advertising depict the modern woman? 28 Who’s Better, Who’s Best Girls outperform boys in school, but sustaining careers is hard 32 Not A Fairytale A seemingly innocent little story has more depth than expected 36 Watch What She Watches Female cartoon characters can be inspirational... or destructive
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Comment 38 Of Myths And Men Society uses myths of ‘morality’ to control women
Feature
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40 Eye Of The Beholder A look at some of the most misogynistic practices in history
Positive Pakistanis 42 One Step At A Time If you thought going to school was hard... think again
Up North and Personal 50 Friendly Neighbourhood Firebrand An irate neighbour can make life miserable
Regulars 6 People & Parties: Out and about with Pakistan’s beautiful people 16 Tribune Questionnaire: Uns Mufti on his feminine side 46 Reviews: What’s new in films and books 52 Horoscope: Shelley von Strunckel on your week ahead 44 Ten Things I Hate About: Women
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Editor: Zarrar Khuhro. Sub-Editors: Batool Zehra, Hamna Zubair Creative Team: Amna Iqbal, Jamal Khurshid, Essa Malik, Anam Haleem, Tariq Alvi, S Asif Ali, Samad Siddiqui, Sukayna Sadik Publisher: Bilal A Lakhani. Executive Editor: Muhammad Ziauddin. Editor: Kamal Siddiqi. For feedback and submissions: magazine@tribune.com.pk
PEOPLE & PARTIES
Designer Saim Ali launches his label in the UAE
Saba Zaman Gull
and
Alliya baig
Zarmina and Rana Noman
Saira and Nadia Hussain
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id Fatime ul Maj
Fiza Hussain and Shumila Asif
PEOPLE & PARTIES
L’oreal launches its spring/summer line
Nabila and
Immu
Amina Sheikh
Kamiar Rokhni
Fia
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Ali Zafar
Nabila with the models
PEOPLE & PARTIES
Sitara presents Shamaeel’s 2011 lawn collection in Karachi
Mian Anees Ahmad
Aamna Ilyas
Sadaf Muneer
af Nabila Bano As
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Shamaeel
Ruqhia Nazeer and Selina R Khan
PEOPLE & PARTIES
Bonanza launches its lawn collection
aniya Erum and D ts es gu with
Layla
Farah Khan with a friend
if Mr and Mrs As i Bilwan
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Samar Mehdi
Frieha and Zainab
PEOPLE & PARTIES
Behroz with Hassan Somro
Reema
Meera
Hanif Bilwani and Erum Bilwani Farieha Shah, Alizeh Atif, Mrs Erum Bilwani, Shahrukh Shabaz and Mr Usman Bilwani
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Dania with Friends
“I’m very in touch with my feminine side” Filmmaker Uns Mufti on living on three dollars a day and his fear of dying slowly. What is your idea of perfect happiness?
If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
I have no such ideas. I’m perfectly happy cracking silly jokes at
My bank balance.
opportune moments.
What is your greatest fear? Dying slowly. I also fear words like “perfect” and “greatest”.
What is your most treasured possession? Till yesterday it was a pair of speakers but last night the owner came to my house and stole them.
What is the trait you most deplore in others?
Who are your heroes in real life?
Every time I isolate something I hate about someone, I find
My khansama. I’ve never seen a man with three kids and a wife
falling for this one.
sleeping pills but that could just be my love of conspiracy.
myself doing the exact same thing 10 minutes later, so no I’m not
be so relaxed. He may be cheating though. I suspect he’s taking
What is your greatest extravagance?
What is your greatest regret?
Living on three dollars a day. Seems pretty extravagant if you
Regret is for suckers.
a dollar a day.
What’s your favourite quote?
know that 80 million people in this country live on less than half
What is your current state of mind? My body lives in a ‘state’ but my mind roams free. I’m always
Suck on this! What kind of super powers would you like to have?
excited about nothing.
Bringing to my living room any woman I see in magazine posters
What do you consider the most overrated virtue?
three times out loud.
Virtues of all kinds seem to be overrated especially when all they seem
or movies by just snapping my fingers and saying the word talaaq
to do is keep you from getting that million dollar defense contract.
If you had a time machine, where would you go?
What do you most dislike about your appearance?
dhaaba.
I have no ass. Which living person do you most despise? Anyone who goes to work every day in their private jet. Unless I become them, I’ll always despise them. What is the quality you most like in a man? I like a man who doesn’t make his presence felt, doesn’t talk back
to you and does what he’s told. As you can see, I’m very in touch
I’d go back to last night and not have that katakut from that
What’s the one thing you wish someone would invent? Portable air conditioners. You know something you can wear on your ears when you go out in the month of June. What’s the last really good movie you watched? All movies are good. I can watch crap and be totally floored. Like The Green Hornet. Best movie ever.
with my feminine side.
If they made a movie on your life, who would you want to play your role?
What is the quality you most like in a woman?
do me justice. Besides if this kind of opportunity does arrive, I’d
I like a woman who doesn’t make her presence felt, doesn’t talk
back to you and does what she’s told. As you can see, I’m all man. Which words or phrases do you most overuse? Calibrate, rustication, Bermuda and trilateral are some of the words I use all the time.
I would want to play my role. I don’t think anyone else would want to take full advantage…
What would the movie be called? Abbu dee la! It would be a Punjabi film. We can call it Above the Law
in English. a
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COVER STORY
m(ad)
women Unlike the strong women that Pakistanis see in their public lives, the Pakistani woman in our ads is an unreal creature whose self-worth is determined by approval from those around her. BY BATOOL ZEHR ZEHRA RA
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COVER STORY The Pakistani woman today has more choices open to her than ever before. Not only are more girls
opting for higher education, they are actually outperforming their male peers. (See p 28) Pakistani sportswomen — Naseem Hameed, the women’s cricket team — have gained international acclaim, filling fans with patriotic fervour when they succeed.
Gone are the days when part-time teaching was the only employment that made sense for a married woman — now more and
more are forging full-time corporate careers, along with bring-
ing up the children and managing the household. In the cities, where women from the lower-middle class have always been economically active, now women from all social strata are stepping into the workplace.
Then why is it, that when I switch on my TV, the woman I see
is still the same stereotypical picture-perfect housewife trying to
sell us cooking oils, detergents and soaps much as she did twenty
years ago? If it’s not her, it’s the insecure single woman, who thinks that her route to marital bliss is through attaining perfect skin and hair which will enable her to snag an eligible bachelor.
Unlike the many strong, ground-breaking women that Pakistanis see in their public lives, the Pakistani woman in our ads is a
strange creature whose self-esteem hinges on how well she manages to wash her husband’s shirt or how much sex appeal she exudes. She lives in constant guilt and insecurity, fretting over
her children, fussing around her husband, craving approval and reassurances from everyone around her.
The angel of the house There are sound business reasons for advertisers to focus on a woman. A woman is the main decision-maker as far as household purchases are concerned. Financial independence is largely
irrelevant - it is nearly always the housewife who makes the groceries’ list. In her capacity as the ‘influencer’ in these purchasing
decisions, the housewife remains a key target market for makers of consumer goods.
“The home is female-oriented and it’s the female who does
the shopping and decides what the child should eat, so it makes
sense to target the mother. If we do use the father, it’ll be strat-
egy-based, not a regular thing,” says Omer Hussain, the head of the creative department at BBCL.
From household electronic appliances to ice creams, to sham-
poos and soaps, it is the woman who sells the product. On any
given day, there’ll be dozens of ads on TV with dozens of women.
But the woman depicted in all of them will be more or less the same. In her youthful incarnation, she is the desperate-for-attention college girl surrounded by a posse of friends and admirers. When she grows up, she is the housewife who keeps up the
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perfect facade while her husband and in-laws fall at her feet.
“Largely, the depiction of women hasn’t changed from 20 years
ago,” says Sami Shah, creative director of a major ad agency. “For
most products in the market, the housewife is the target consumer and advertisers play with variations on the approaches to her: there’s the bechari housewife, the dutiful housewife and the perfect housewife.”
These women have “modernised” without truly changing.
“Some MNCs have tried to go beyond the housewife stereotype
by portraying confident, outgoing women. But at best they show
them as models or actresses,” says columnist and cultural critic Nadeem Farooq Paracha.
However, Rashna who is an executive creative director at the
advertising firm, IAL Saatchi and Saatchi, has a rosier view.
“Contrary to popular belief, depictions have changed from 20 years ago. You do still have a housewife hanging clothes and
making food. That does not make her less worthy. Even if she is a housewife and mother living in a joint family system, how she
approaches the role has changed. She is more self-assured, more confident,” she argues.
Some ad people claim that there are now many more non-
traditional roles which depict women as having come into their own and not just following roles that society has placed on them.
Safeguard ads depict female doctors recommending the use of the soap to keep germs and disease at bay. But such progressive
ads are painfully few and far between and their impact diminishes in the flood of ads reinforcing the stereotype. It is rare too,
to see a female protagonist in hi-tech products. Cell phones and cell phone connections seem to be marketed exclusively to men, as do energy drinks. If a woman makes her way in an ad for any
of these products, she will merely be the prize that the man gets for using that particular product.
“This is the sheer nature of the market,” explains Rashna. “Of
Pakistan’s 20 million internet users, two-thirds are men. There are more men than women on the internet, using cell phones and on Facebook. There are more financially independent men than women.”
Despite the Asma Jehangirs and Naseem Hameeds, the woman
of the ad-world is almost exclusively a homemaker. This, despite
the fact that women in urban lower-middle income class routinely work outside the house out of sheer economic imperative. Their financial contribution is essential in holding the family together.
“There is a respectable, rising rate of double-income families.
But there tends to be less appreciation of the fact that women are not only confined to the house, and of the role they’re playing in the economy,” says Shah.
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COVER STORY I aspire to . . . wash clothes Some believe that this insistence on focusing on the stereotypical housewife might actually be doing the products a disservice. “When ad people show perfect housewives, they try to justify
it by claiming that they are showing aspirational ads,” says Paracha. “They don’t realise that they are actually alienating
Despite causing a long-lasting shifts in consumer habits, it is ironic that marketing and advertising companies do not see themselves as agents of change.
consumers. Women don’t aspire to become begums. Not only is it economically impossible, they have more important roles to play in society.”
Still, it is hard to break ingrained habits. According to Shah,
“Ads deal largely with stereotypes because they’re easier to relate to. No brand wants a paradigm shift because of the risk involved.”
Eliminating risk is a key goal for companies who want to mar-
ket their products as widely as possible. Of the two to four consumer profiles that they get from market research, companies
must decide what percentage of the population each represents. The aim is to relate to the largest target market and hone in on
as many consumers as possible. Ad agencies simply work on the briefs provided by the marketing department of the relevant company. The target consumer is a key component of that brief.
“We try to see what the potential consumer is already doing
and then try to fit into their lifestyle,” says Sana, a marketing
and sales employee at P&G. “When we’re selling diapers, people ask us why we don’t target working moms, single mothers or
dads — that’s because it makes more sense to connect with existing consumers. We need to reach a mass market, not a niche. We have to appeal to the lowest common denominator.”
The need to avoid endowing the woman in the ad with any
characteristic which might alienate potential consumers, results in the reinforcement of a bland stereotype. What is sometimes forgotten, though, is that the research itself is open to
questioning. Paracha is extremely skeptical of the methodology
followed in market research. “I used to question these practices all the time,” he says, stressing that much of the research is derived from poorly-assembled focus groups since the money and the will for doing meaningful and extensive surveys is absent.
Despite causing a long-lasting shifts in consumer habits, it
is ironic that marketing and advertising companies do not see themselves as agents of change: “It is not the responsibility of
advertising to preach for change,” asserts Rashna. “It’s about
selling a product. Should an ad be progressive, give substance? Yes, society is evolving and an ad should reflect that evolution. However, people still live in a joint family system and women tend to be the caretakers of the house, but even while refecting
26 MARCH 6- 12 2011
traditions, advertising should not be regressive.”
Sana concurs: “Our aim is to bring a fresh campaign to the
same consumers — we don’t aim for a change in the consumer unless the research shows that we have to.”
But disarming marketing and advertising of its ability to
change and even manipulate consumers is not only simplistic, it
is false. As Paracha says, “Advertisers end up making some sort of a statement whether they like it or not.”
One step forward, two steps back Some argue that the relentless bombardment of the two female
images — the submissive housewife and the siren — is merely a reflection of society. Still, in an industry where internationally
sex appeal is used to sell everything, Pakistan fares a bit better because of strict guidelines on dress codes and behaviour. This is not to say that there haven’t been creative circumventions of
the rules. The Magnum ad, which depicted a smoking-hot Neha eating ice-cream, caused a furore when it aired and was quickly toned down. It now enjoys immortality on YouTube.
“A lot of things have become accepted in our society. People are
more open,” says Omer Hussain, who worked on the ad. “As far as the Magnum ad was concerned you have to understand that this is the positioning of the product worldwide –provocative.”
Interestingly, research shows that sex appeal works both
“When we’re selling diapers, people ask us why we don’t target working moms, single mothers or dads – that’s because it makes more sense to connect with existing consumers. We need to reach a mass market, not a niche. We have to appeal to the lowest common denominator.”
ways: a man with chiselled features and ripped abs in an ad targeted at women, has just as much potential to lure in consumers. However, it is nearly always a woman who is objectified and subtly pressurised to attain a certain ideal of physical beauty. “The only reason you see it more in male targeted ads is because
there are other ways to appeal to women — women want meaning in things. But it does not necessarily ensure long-term sales and will not work at all if it is tasteless,” says Rashna.
Others argue though that the pressures created by advertis-
ing are not for women alone. “Women are using media to their
advantage,” says Omer Hussain. “At the same time you have to see that metrosexuality is growing, men want to look good and women are becoming more and more demanding of men.”
Twenty years the only females in advertising were models,
but now there are many more women in senior positions in the
corporate and the creative side, and in marketing. What is truly
fascinating is how the women in this field seem to have inter-
nalised the philosophy of their male counterparts and continue to reinforce the female stereotype. Perhaps with a little more
time, when these women truly come into their own, we’ll see a different woman in our ads. a
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who’s better
who’s best They say it’s a man’s world, but it’s the girls who rule the schools. BY HAMNA ZUBAIR
>>A chat with succesful women: Sana Mir, captain of Pakistan’s women’s cricket team: “It feels so great to be known as a successful woman. Abroad, everyone thinks of Pakistan as a backward, male dominated society. It feels so good to be able to go abroad and show people a different side to Pakistan. I love representing the country. I see a great future for Pakistani women, because now we have girls entering into all sorts of fields, occupations that they never set foot in before. I would tell young girls to work honestly and have a lot of patience, whether they want to excel at cricket or in any other field. With patience and hard work, you’ll go a long way.”<<
How many times have you opened up a newspaper to read news about the latest matric or intermediate results to find that most of the top-scoring students were female? Let’s refresh our collective memories: in August 2010 when the
Board of Intermediate and Secondary Education (BISE) Lahore announced its Matriculation results, two girls, Ramla Ijaz and Za-
breen Tahir, bagged the top two positions. In 2004, in the same examination, the Board found that girls scored better marks than boys on average, with 41 girls getting A grades and just two boys getting the same. In 2005 as well, Ayesha Iqbal came first in the same examination.
While conclusive evidence is hard to come by, it is clear that
more and more girls are ruling their schools. Enrolment rates for women in secondary schools, degree colleges and universities look promising, as education statistics for 2008-09 reveal that 45
per cent of students enrolled in higher secondary or intermediate level schools were girls, and 44 per cent of students enrolled in universities were girls too.
That’s not all — according to the Academy of Educational Plan-
ning and Management, overall female enrolment in primary schools, both public and private, increased by over three per cent from 2007-08 to 2008-09. Female enrolment in secondary
schools, teacher training institutes and vocational institutes also increased, with enrolment in universities increasing by over four per cent.
“Girls are getting serious about education!” declares a woman
who is an institution in herself, prominent educationist Anita Ghulam Ali. Ms Ghulam Ali, Managing Director of the Sindh Education Foundation, goes so far as to say that more girls were pursuing higher education these days than boys.
“Girls tend to be more committed,” says Ms Ghulam Ali. “You
have to realise that for many girls, pursuing higher education is the only way they can make something of themselves.”
Ms Ghulam Ali confirms that most position holders these days
tend to be girls, especially in the Humanities. “However, I think
this is more prevalent in middle class families... in more elite
HR consultant Leon Menezes says that while he feels women
families, the top scorers still tend to be boys,” she says.
tend to be more industrious and reliable at the workplace, the
class families who attend public sector schools and universities
reers after a certain point.”
Why is that? According to Ms Ghulam Ali, girls in middle
are driven to succeed because education is the only ‘socially ac-
real problem is “getting women to continue to pursue their ca-
“I’ve found that women want to work in departments like HR
ceptable’ means for them to get out of their homes and do some-
and brand management... they shy away from sales. But if you
kind of apathy,” she notes. “Boys just want to make money, and
ness roles.” Ultimately, Leon says the biggest obstacle women
thing. “Boys from this background seem to have fallen into a in Pakistan, unfortunately, being educated does not necessarily translate into earning a good income.”
Ms Ghulam Ali sees this trend continuing in the future, mostly
because of what she says are mothers’ changing attitudes. “These
want to get to the top, you have to get your hands dirty in busihave to overcome is their own hesitancy: “The barrier you create in your own mind is much bigger than any barrier your family or society can use to obstruct your path to success,” he says.
With the expansion of the tertiary sector, however, and in-
days mothers want their daughters to be educated- we see it even
creased rural to urban migration, women who excel at school
it’s because girls are seen as being more reliable... when girls
financially viable future. If women can be determined enough to
in the rural areas, where the bulk of our work is based. I think
work, they tend to hand their earnings over to their parents, it’s an added source of income.”
Of course, there is another factor that could explain why
women have begun to outshine men in education: “You should
have a better chance at securing themselves a bright, successful,
stay in school and excel at their studies at the same time, there’s
likely no force powerful enough to keep them from translating their scholastic success to victories in the workplace. a
also keep in mind that those women who make it to university
*Name has been changed to protect identity
wouldn’t even be in school,” says an official at the Sindh Edu-
>>A chat with succesful women: Asma Jehangir, President of the SCBA “Being a ‘successful’ woman in Pakistan means you will face more resistance from people who have extreme or conservative views. You can of course use this to your advantage sometimes- for example, during my campaigns, I had access to areas that men couldn’t access. But there is always this feeling that you’re different... people will always think that you can’t do things as well as a man could.” “The average Pakistan woman will have to face a lot of difficulties in the next 10 years: there are indications that there will be more poverty, and as always, women will be the hardest hit. More women are at a disadvantage now because of the humanitarian crises we have suffered. Shortages of resources always strike women first. And then you have the increases in violence against women...” “I would tell young girls: Don’t be afraid of criticism. Be strong, and stand up for what you believe in but don’t be too rigid. And don’t be self-righteous.”<<
level are already very committed to their studies- otherwise they cation Foundation. “That’s why they excel, and will continue to excel wherever they go.”
Ayesha Ali*, a student on the honour roll at a Karachi medical
college, says she too feels that girls consistently outperform boys
in school and university. “This was reflected in our batch,” she says. “We had seven girls on the honour roll, and just two boys.”
There are indications that girls outperform boys at the prima-
ry level too. Mansoora Tufeyl, National Coordinator at the Aga
Khan Education Service, focuses on work at the ECD level (Early Childhood Development). She says that in urban areas, girls at the primary level generally perform better than boys. However,
girls’ performance and enrolment in schools in rural areas is still lagging. Interestingly, 2008-09 education statistics indicate that
there are twice as many public sector primary schools in rural ar-
eas for boys compared to facilities provided to girls — one of the many hindrances to education girls in rural areas have to contend with.
However, whether this apparent success in education trans-
lates into success in the workplace is another matter. Ms Ghulam
Ali says women are becoming increasingly active in the workforce, especially in rural areas: “In rural areas, the community
prefers that health care providers and teachers be women — so
there is a huge market for educated, skilled female professionals,” she says.
But while women’s participation in traditionally ‘female’ pro-
fessions like teaching and nursing may have increased, what about their roles in banking, engineering and management?
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Hollywood’s been beating on dead horses for a while now, so it’s quite a relief that it now seems to have found itself an immortal one. Re-imaginings of fairy tales are the new vampire movie – they’re also the new teen movie, the new first date movie and the new body horror movie. The source material for
these modern constructs is ancient, powerful folklore that taps into a primal coming of age anxiety and fear and it is easy to see
why the material can be translated into so many inter-connected genres. Of course, it helps when the stories are too old to have any
copyright restrictions on them — studios can do as they please with the works of the Brothers Grimm, for instance, and owe nothing to anyone for a ready made story filled with intrigue, sex, murder, violence… all the things that sell the best.
who’s afraid of the
big bad wolf? The Brothers Grimm collected ancient folk tales in the early
Life’s no fairy tale, but fairy tales can tell us a lot about how we look at life… and ourselves.
BY MAHVESH MURAD
1800’s, but the stories were part of an oral tradition of storytelling
for centuries before. It’s unlikely that they can be improved upon,
but what can be looked forward to is a return to the true form of the fairy tale, one that accepts the existence of strong female characters who are not pale, washed out female leads, damsels in distress, or prudish princesses afraid of their own impending adult-
hood. The original source material features plenty of young women
veering off the path and into the woods, and there have been a few
instances of female leads who empower themselves with their new experiences.
The one person to bring to attention all that was latent in the
classic fairy tale was British writer Angela Carter. Her screenplay for the 1984 film The Company of Wolves was based on her own short
story of the same name, written in 1979. Carter’s take on Charles
Perrault’s classic Little Red Riding Hood pulled out all the stops — the film’s cinematography, sets and art work are all inspired by gothic
fairy tale illustrations, everything is heightened to an almost druginduced state and there is a strong sense of brooding melancholy and loneliness throughout the film — all of this of course adds to
Carter’s metaphors for puberty and sexual awakening. She wasn’t the first to use lycanthropy and physical transformation into the
monstrous feminine as a metaphor for puberty, but she was the
first to bring it to the absolute forefront of the story. Carter’s Red doesn’t just court danger by straying off the path; she covets it until it is a part of her.
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>> Watch Now -The Company of Wolves -Ginger Snaps -Buffy the Vampire Slayer << >> Watch Soon -Beastly -Red Riding Hood -Maleficent -Hansel & Gretel: The Witch Hunters -Snow White & the Huntsman -Snow & the Seven -The Brothers Grimm: Snow White <<
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The Company of Wolves was not a commercial success and although
well received by critics, it remained a one-off representation of the clearly empowered female hero. The slasher films of the late 70s
and 80s mistakenly positioned the Final Girl as a nod to feminism. Films like Alien, Halloween, Friday the 13th and A Nightmare on Elm Street
all featured a sole female survivor of violence who was always a girl
masculinised via her clothes, her attitude, her independence, her assertiveness and even sometimes her name. Here was a strong female lead who survived by wits (and usually a large, ‘male’ weapon), but often she was giving up her femininity and sometimes her own desires as a woman in order to live. Of
course, this all tied in with what was contemporary liberal feminist theory at the time — women were still assuming that they would have to be masculine in
order to be powerful. When would there be a female hero who could be feminine
and still fight the good fight? A female
hero who could give into her own desires and still emerge as not just a survivor, but a victor in every way.
Enter “Buffy, the Vampire Slayer”.
Sure, Joss Whedon’s Buffy-verse isn’t
based on any one fairy tale, but Whedon drew very heavily from the fairy tale
gothic when he created the very premise of the vampire slayer: the chosen one, a
girl from each generation who carried in her the powers passed down from the original slayer, powers that came from the very
a tale retold The movie The Company of Wolves sheds new light on Little Red Riding Hood
darkness she was to battle. For Whedon, the archetype of the
modern female hero was that of a girl who accepted the darkness, acknowledged the demon within her and let it make her stronger. The First Slayer may not have welcomed the darkness initially, but Buffy embraces it and makes it her own. Not just does she use her
power to battle the forces of evil, but is also empowered enough to handle the biggest demon of all: adulthood. Oh, and she saved the world a lot.
Whedon acknowledged his fairy tale sources at various times
during the Buffy series — the most obvious one being Buffy choosing to dress as Red Riding Hood on Halloween, and multiple refer-
ences to an evil known to the Scoobies as the Big Bad. Clearly, it all comes back to Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf.
Before Twilight director Catherine Hardwick chose to bring Red
back to the big screen, a small budget Canadian film called Ginger Snaps attempted to pick up where The Company of Wolves had left off. Ginger Snaps also explores lycanthropy as a metaphor for pu-
berty — and what better way to describe the strange, bloody and fascinating changes any young girl goes through at that point in
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her life. Not just is her body alien to those around her, it truly beMARCH 6- 12 2011
comes alien to her — almost as if it were the body of a creature from
a nightmare, a werewolf that she transforms into each month… unwillingly at first, and later, when she embraces adulthood, with
greater ease. Ginger Snaps takes the painful realities of teenage life
and brings out the large element of body horror that belongs with the reality of puberty: a body that bleeds for days at a time but lives; a body that changes so rapidly, becomes capable of so much so soon
and yet survives. But what seemed to be an incredibly strong prem-
ise for Ginger Snaps does not end well — while Ginger accepts her new self, her sister is not able to and the film
ends with a disappointing reversion to the idea of the Final Girl.
So how will Catherine Harwick’s
March 2011 film Red Riding Hood avoid this
cliché? How will Amanda Seyfried’s Red be empowered and more importantly,
remain empowered? This latest ver-
sion of the story is not just about the girl who strays off the path — it is also
a suspense thriller with a love triangle.
Not just is her body alien to those around her, it truly becomes alien to her — almost as if it were the body of a creature from a nightmare, a werewolf that she transforms into each month…
Seyfried plays a girl who is torn between two men, and is attempting to solve the mystery of who the werewolf may be
and from the trailer, her character appears well aware of her sexuality. ‘We are
throwing all the sex and danger back in’, says Seyfried, who accepts that ‘when
these stories were first written, they
were so much darker. Over time, they became more prudish in a way, taking the danger and sexuality out of the stories’.
It remains to be seen whether Hardwick’s film will present a
strong female lead or not, but she’s not the only one attempting to bring out the latent in fairy tales. Suddenly, everyone seems to be reading Angela Carter. There are plans for several Hollywood films based on Snow White and Hansel and Gretel amongst others and
even a TV series called “Red: Werewolf Hunter”. Why the interest in fairy tales? Is it a sign of the times? Looking back at classic fairy
tales again, many of the Grimms’ tales were told at difficult times, including when Germany was under occupation during the Napoleonic wars. After all, on a simplistic level all fairy tales open up ideas of escape and/or survival — something perhaps people are looking to in times like these.
But what are women looking to? What will these films say about
women to young girls growing up in these same times? Will these
films be able to promote independence and assertiveness in their
female leads, without having them resort to masculinity or to men for a final resolution? The distance between fairy tales and real
world isn’t too large, especially in a young girl’s life, and it can only be hoped that a strong, truthful female hero in fiction will help in
35
being one in reality. a
MARCH 6-12 2011
DORA: ROLE MODEL-O-METER: 5/5 Optimistic, inquisitive, helpful and intelligent at the same
time, “Dora the Explorer” stands out as an excellent role model for young girls… and boys! Dora’s innocent adventures are crusades against myths about women — Dora shows that girls can
successfully navigate unfamiliar territory, enjoy outdoor adventures and have excellent leadership skills — all without being
overbearing in the least. She listens carefully to her friend, Boots
the monkey, frequently asks the viewer for help and often shows affection for Boots and her family. Dora radiates positivity, even
when dealing with the antagonist of the show, the sneaky fox Swiper, who loves stealing things. She assertively tries to stop him, often explaining why he shouldn’t do what he’s about to.
watch what she watches As they say, the girl is the mother of the woman. And what your little girl watches could affect how she sees the world around her, and her place in it.
However, even when she fails, instead of focusing on Swiper’s naughtiness, she constructively sets about recovering what
Swiper has thrown away. You may think that a rudimentary
knowledge of Spanish is one of the best things your kid will pick up from the show but for me, the show’s most valuable lesson is the importance of listening to others’ perspectives. POWERPUFF GIRLS: ROLE MODEL-O-METER: 4/5 Sugar, spice and everything nice. Literally. No seriously, that’s what the Powerpuff girls are actually made of… along with a
dose of chemical X of course. These super-powered siblings fight crime, save the day, attend school, do their homework and are
in bed by nine. Along the way they also deal with sibling rivalry
and some very familiar moral dilemmas. And these role models
have role models of their own: the mayors’ gorgeous secretary Mrs Bellum is also super-smart and is the real power behind the
mayoral throne, while Mrs Keane, their kindergarten teacher, is kind and tough at the same time. By contrast, the female villains
use their sexuality for evil ends. Sedusa, for example, poses as
an innocent after committing crimes and the femme fatale uses
feminist rhetoric to justify her own robberies. All in all, you can’t go wrong with “The Powerpuff Girls”. BARBIE: ROLE MODEL-O-METER 3/5 The reigning queen of unrealistic body image, Barbie’s been
hailed and reviled in equal measure. But let’s face it, our plastic prima donna gets a bad rap… ok so she does look like the poster
girl for the Aryan Nation, and she does have a hip to waist ratio no amount of rib removal would ever achieve… but Barbie’s also
a working woman! She’s been an astronaut, a doctor and even a presidential candidate. She does love her wardrobes and accessories but one can hardly fault her for that. All in all, girls could do a lot worse as far as role models are concerned.
BRATZ: ROLE MODEL-O-METER 0/5 And speaking of far worse… the prize for worst role models ever
go to the ‘prosti-tots’ known as the Bratz dolls. Overly made-up, dressed in fashions (fishnet stockings, stiletto heels and miniskirts) that a streetwalker would draw the line at and obsessed with boys and shopping, the Bratz are any sane parent’s worst
nightmare. They’re the girls you don’t want your daughter hanging out with, or your son bringing home. And naturally, they’re
a mega-hit. Amazing what millions of dollars of marketing money will do for you.
WINX CLUB: ROLE MODEL-O-METER 3/5 Marketed directly at ‘tweens (9-14+) the “Winx Club” is about a group of fairies who battle evil forces with their magical powers.
On the plus side, the Winx also stand up for each other, displaying strong bonds of friendship and love. While many of them are in relationships with the opposite sex, they don’t go in for flings
and their relationships tend to be long-term (a few are even en-
gaged). On the downside, they are all drawn like supermodels, with chiseled features, lots of make-up and waists that are smaller than their hands! They also seem to uniformly dress in miniskirts,
short shorts, belly-baring shirts and high heels. Not the best role
models when it comes to fostering a realistic body image, but they get high points for their confidence and poise… these girls end up rescuing the boys on more than one occasion. a
37 MARCH 6-12 2011
COMMENT
of myths and men Haven’t we had enough of how society uses myths of ‘morality’ to control women? BY FOUZIA SAEED
I’ve received a lot of feedback from readers of my book Taboo: The Hidden Culture of a Red Light Area over the past ten years: Some say they understand the community in Shahi Mohalla more after reading about it, others say they can more clearly see the hypocrisy in the double standards that exist for men and women. Many young people tell me that they
always wanted to learn to play a musical instrument, only to face opposition from their families. Others say they finally un-
derstand why society condemns the performing arts and treats
music and art as dubious pastimes. Wives were freed up enough
to admit they were uncomfortable with their roles and identities after sex workers talked about the difficulties that ‘good women’ in society face.
I was lucky enough to get this feedback. I have also been heart-
ened to see people taking a keen interest in women’s issues since
38 MARCH 6-12 2011
then. Students have become more inquisitive about Shahi Mo-
halla and areas like it, and have started doing their own research.
Many young women have become frustrated by their subservient status in our society and asked what they could do about it.
Looking back, if I had to sum up what my research was all about,
I would say it aimed to reveal how our patriarchal society uses the myth of women’s ‘morality’ and ‘virtue’ as a tool of control.
Most women try their best to be ‘good,’ keeping in view the
pressures society places on them. Despite this, our society keeps
telling them they are loose or immoral because of some small de-
viation from the mysterious norms of morality. Women need to carefully tip toe within the narrow path of approved behavior –
they can only create some elbow room by fulfilling their desires by engaging in those activities that are considered ‘acceptable’.
Therefore those who are not allowed to sing popular songs make
do with singing naats. Those who are not allowed to dance celebrate this simple pleasure at mehndis. Those who are not allowed to engage in social activities, connect, often more precariously,
Women who are not allowed to sing popular songs make do with singing naats. Those who are not allowed to dance celebrate this simple pleasure at mehndis. Those who are not allowed to engage in social activities, connect, often more precariously, on the internet.
on the internet.
I hope the current debates on women and their status gives im-
petus to a conversation where we can question the whole issue of
morality and the way that it engulfs women in our society. The concept of being ‘good’ or ‘bad’ looms large in our current discourse. As much is revealed in the research I conducted, where
the problems faced by both prostitutes and ordinary housewives were heartbreakingly similar. Both suffer; sex workers have to live with constant stigma and are marginalised, while housewives live in constant fear that their reputations could suddenly be ruined by one small misstep.
We need to question who defines these moral standards and
why they only focus on women. We need to understand the role this morality plays in patriarchal hierarchies through the powers
of prohibition, sanction and punishment. We need to recognize how men’s concept of morality is used as a beating stick to keep women in their ‘proper place’.
Perhaps the younger generation will take up this discussion. It
is long overdue. I hope, with time, we will deepen the simplistic slogans of ‘end violence against women’ by questioning the social
context that fosters such violence. We should begin by redefining gender roles and balancing the powers that have been usurped by
one gender over the other. Haven’t we had enough of husbands
burning their wives and communities beating women to death because they are merely suspected of having broken a moral standard? Haven’t we had enough of sexual harassment of women by
men who blame them for causing it? Only young women and men
together can begin to redefine our gender roles and our accepted standards of morality. a
Fouzia Saeed’s book, the tenth anniversary edition of Taboo: The Hidden Culture of
39
a Red Light Area is available now. MARCH 6-12 2011
WHAT: FOOT BINDING WHERE: CHINA WHEN: 900BC-1949AD WHY: The custom of foot binding was at first a sign of wealth, as
the woman with a properly bound foot could do very little. This remained a custom of royalty, the nobility and the very rich until
the beginning of the 17th century. By the end of the 1600’s, millions of women from all classes were binding their feet in order to imitate the upper classes. Women with unbound feet also had little chance of receiving marriage proposals.
HOW: Girls as young as four had their feet soaked in a special mixture to soften them. Their toes were then broken and curled inwards towards the soles of the feet to form the desired concave shape. The feet were then tied tightly with soaked bandages that
eye of the beholder Throughout history, women have been subjected, or have subjected themselves, to dangerous practices in the name of beauty or in order to conform to social norms…here are some of the worst:
were further tightened when they dried. The result, achieved after years of pain, was the prized three-inch ‘Lotus foot’.
CONSEQUENCES: Apart from the extreme pain of the process itself, and the obvious difficulty in walking, victims were prone
to blood poisoning, as ingrown toenails cut the skin. Gangrene would also set in, sometimes resulting in toes rotting off.
NOW: Despite periodic bans, foot-binding only stopped after the
Chinese communists took power in 1949. There are still aged women in China with bound feet, the last remnants of a cruel legacy
WHAT: CORSETS WHEN: 1500’s till present day WHY: While the original corsets were meant to flatten the bust and push up the breasts, later corsets were meant to create the appearance of a super-thin ‘wasp waist’.
HOW: Corsets were ‘tight-laced’ to produce the desired effect. From a young age, girls would be put in tighter and tighter cor-
sets in order to train their bodies to assume the desired shape. In many cases, several people would be needed to pull the laces while the woman being dressed exhaled as much as she could.
CONSEQUENCES: Tight lacing reduced the lung capacity of generations of women, leading to the perception that women would faint at the least excitement. This was true as the body would
not be able to get enough oxygen at times of excitement, caus-
ing women to black out. Extreme tight-lacing, as in the case of a Parisian woman with a 13 inch waist, caused her liver to be punctured by her ribs. Rib fractures were common and in some cases, the severe compression of internal organs also lead to death.
NOW: An increased demand for metal in world war one dealt a blow to the corset industry, and the popularity of brassieres and MARCH 6-12 2011
girdles also dented the use of corsets. Lately corsets have enjoyed
a straw. With the neck muscles atrophied, a woman who had her
items, but thankfully without the tight-lacing.
head up and may even choke while drinking or eating.
something of a comeback as part of fetish fashion and lingerie
rings removed (as a punishment) would be unable to hold her NOW:
WHAT: FORCED FATTENING WHERE: Mauritania WHEN: ? Till present
The practice continues in parts of Thailand and Burma largely as a tourist attraction. REALITY CHECK:
WHY: While Mauritania is not the only culture where female obe-
When we point a finger at others, at least three of our fingers
women are force-fed to achieve the desired effect. Poems and
for obese women isn’t very different from current trends that
sity is considered a desirable trait, it is the only country where
traditional songs celebrate grossly overweight women; and a
popular saying is that the “The glory of a man is measured by the fatness of his woman.” In this traditionally nomadic culture, fat women were considered a sign of wealth and better suited to survive the harsh conditions.
HOW: The practice known as ‘gavage’ begins early. In one case a
point right back at us! we should bear in mind that a propensity favour an unrealistic size zero figure, regardless of the anorexia
and bulimia epidemics it inspires. Similarly injection our fore-
heads with toxins, or injecting collagen into our bodies may well be looked at by future generations as a hideous and condemnable practice. a
girl as young as four was forced to consume up to 14 gallons of camel’s milk every day and beaten when she refused. Wife-fat-
tening farms even exist in the country where young girls are sent and sometimes force-fed to make them desirable for their future
husbands. A typical day involves three sessions where the girls
are made to consume large amounts of dates and couscous followed by gallons of milk and water. The use of hunger-inducing amphetamines and steroids is also widespread.
CONSEQUENCES: With a quarter of the female population classified as obese, Mauritanian women face a host of problems in-
cluding diabetes, heart disease and other obesity-related disorders.
NOW: Old habits die hard, but perceptions are changing. TV and
radio campaigns highlight the dangers of obesity and the government has commissioned songs extolling skinny women to counter the folk songs that celebrate obesity. WHAT: NECK-STRETCHING WHERE: PARTS OF SOUTH AFRICA, BURMA AND THAILAND WHEN: ? till present WHY: While the origin of this practice is unknown, elongated
necks are considered beautiful in the tribes that practice neck stretching. The addition of extra rings (sometimes made of brass) also showed the material wealth of the family and tribe.
HOW: Rings are snapped around the necks of girls starting at the age of six. More rings are added every year, up to a total of twenty, although there are claims that the record is 28 rings. The
rings are only removed once on the woman’s wedding day for a ceremonial neck-washing. CONSEQUENCES:
While neck-stretching is apparently a misnomer (in reality the shoulder bones are pushed down, giving the impression of a long neck), the consequences are quite real. A woman with a full set
41
of rings could not tip her head back and would have to drink from MARCH 6-12 2011
POSITIVE PEOPLE PAKISTANIS
one step at a time With all the bad news surrounding us, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s easy to give in to despair. But there is hope out there, and this country of ours is filled with people who have struggled in the face of adversity and won. Here is the story of one such person.
42 MARCH 6-12 2011
The journey of a million miles begins with a single step - Confucius As the sun rises over the village of Koza Rkale in the Khyber agency, children begin getting ready for another day at school. As they walk towards the school, it’s easy to pick out nine-year old Zaina Bibi from the crowd; this rosy-cheeked girl is the one struggling to keep pace with her friends. Walking the 500 metres to the school is not an easy task for a little girl hobbled by polio.
Zaina is lucky on two counts: one, that her family supports her education — a rarity in the deeply conservative tribal areas where the majority of people are against sending their children to school. Second, that her school has not been destroyed by militants in the volatile region of Khyber where, according to the department of education, 28 schools have been blown up by militants in the recent past, the majority of which were girls’ schools.
In 2002, when she was barely a year old, Zaina was struck by
Zaina’s father is a driver in soap-manufacturing company in
polio and her left leg withered. She isn’t the only one. In the
Muscat and her family lives with her uncle Khyal Muhammad.
Khyber Agency alone, 35 children were crippled by polio in 2010.
Muhammad has been unfailingly supportive of the little girl’s as-
The prognosis for the future is not promising: half of the 210,000
pirations in the past and says he will continue to do so: “We will
children under the age of five in Khyber Agency have missed
continue supporting Zaina morally and financially until she her-
their polio vaccination drops.
self chooses to end her education,” he says with determination.
But though her leg is crippled, Zaina Bibi’s spirit remains un-
Over the past six years, Zaina’s family has changed her leg
dimmed. She copes with the disease by using leg braces to walk
brace twice after she outgrew it. “Now she’s outgrown her leg
and her story is one of unbounded optimism and resilience in the
brace again and it hurts her when she uses it to walk. We will
face of adversity.
have to change it soon,” says her uncle.
“I have difficulties moving but my passion for education gives me the strength to go to school daily,” says the bright nine-year-old.
The WHO’s polio vaccination teams have repeatedly failed to achieve targets in large parts of northern Pakistan and Fata over
If her passion gives her strength, it is her affliction that gives
the past few years due to anti-polio propaganda, growing mili-
her focus. A student of Class III, Zaina wants to become a doc-
tancy and counter-militancy operation. But Zaina Bibi knows
tor and anti-polio campaigner after finishing school: “I want to
nothing of campaigns, targets and five-year plans. For her, the
complete my matriculation. My favourite profession is medicine
only goal is to reach her school every day and gain an education
and I would like to be an anti-polio worker, so I can prevent oth-
so that she can prevent others from falling victim to the disease
er children from falling prey to this disability,” she says with a
that has made that journey of 500 metres seem like a trek of
proud smile on her face.
many miles.
If you know of any people who have achieved something positive, either for themselves or for those around them, please mail us at
43
magazine@tribune.com.pk and help us share their story with the world. MARCH 6-12 2011
FEATURE
trail
blazers Meet a few determined women who are making waves in their chosen fields. PHOTOGRAPHS: MUHAMMAD REZA
Sadaf Mobin — Chef It’s quite ironic how cooking is considered to be a woman’s job yet most great chefs tend to be men. People are not open to the idea of a female chef because
they feel it involves more than just cooking. However, Sadaf Mobin has made
it a challenge for herself to excel in the field, travelling widely and taking cooking courses to add to her knowledge. She says, “Our society is very patriarchal
and most men cannot accept the idea of a woman being ahead of them in a field.” Rather than hold her back, this attitude has in fact spurred her desire to keep learning so that she can become better at what she does.
Sadaf’s husband calls her a ‘lion’ because she has ventured into such a male-
dominated field. “People say that the environment is bad,” says Sadaf. “But we ourselves affect the environment. If I follow a proper code of conduct with other people then there will be no reason for me to feel uncomfortable.”
Rehmat un Nisa — Physiotherapist at Iradah Interacting with mentally and physically handicapped people is not easy - but
luckily some people not only choose to care for people with special needs, but also enjoy their work tremendously. Rehmat un Nisa is one of them. Born in
a village in Chakwal, Rehmat developed a knack for dealing with the handicapped since her father, brothers and uncles were all handicapped. “My work gives me a lot of satisfaction. I enjoy working with kids,” she says.
Rehmat is quite vocal about her beliefs, and says that women must fight for
their rights and should speak up if they face injustice. “I’m very happy with my
independence. If a woman is earning, she gains importance. The same people
who used to oppose me now approach me for help – they want to find jobs for their daughters. And that really makes me feel proud of myself.”
44
MARCH 6-12 2011
Shamim Sardar — Entrepreneur In a small city in Pakistan, an elderly and uneducated woman owns what most
people dream of owning: her very own business. “My brother used to try and
stop me from going out and working,” says Shamim Sardar. “He said he would help me out but he didn’t… so in the end, I helped myself.” Shamim says she invested all of her savings in her business. “There are a lot of advantages, she says. I can educate my children, and there is nothing like being able to work honestly. I’ve also managed to help out my husband.”
Shamim feels that in the present day, both the husband and wife have to
work. She is also of the opinion that when someone limits a woman, he makes
her weaker. Shamim’s story proves that success can come to those who persevere, no matter what the odds.
Tahira — Former driver for the UN How often have you seen a professional female driver in Pakistan? Not too often. There may not be many out there … but Tahira is one of them. “I was provided with a big car, a twin cab. My job was to chauffeur UN staff members
around, deliver the mail and go to the foreign office. People were often shocked
to see a female driver, but I feel you should never stop fighting in life.” Tahira feels that she and her husband have set an excellent example for their children by working hard and never giving up. She feels that nothing would have
been possible without her husband’s support. Tahira is now working at an-
other organisation as an office assistant and receptionist. She is still studying and completing her education. “Whatever your work is, respect is an essential part.” of it,” she says.
Mitho — The circus performer For Mitho,being a woman certainly doesn’t mean that you can’t be a circus performer. Without male relatives to support her, Mitho always had to fend for herself. She first came to know about the circus through her sister.
“I don’t feel I should hold myself back just because I’m a girl,” says Mitho.
When she works with men in the circus she acts like she’s just one of the boys, and says this attitude helps make people take her seriously. She is determined
not to let her gender influence her decisions in any way – whether those decisions are conventional or unconventional. a
Part of a gender sensitive reporting project by International Labour Organisation and The Express Tribune.
45 MARCH 6-12 2011
REVIEW
featured review of the week
film tripping up BY NOFIL NAQVI
The first act of Gasper Noe’s extremely trippy movie Enter the Void is a lot like the visuals one sees at underground dance clubs. In fact, if I was doing visuals for such a club, I would definitely use parts of it. If his 2002 film Irreversible starts off on a particularly disturbing note and keeps heading in a more positive direction, then Enter the Void is pretty much the opposite. Kind of, not really. We start off with a first-person look into the life of Oscar (played by Nathaniel Brown), a French orphan living in Tokyo who has just started dealing drugs. And we get a first-hand look into the effects of some of the drugs that Oscar is selling, and dabbling into as well. The gimmick in Irreversible was the maddening rotating camera movement and backwards timeline, and in Void the first gimmick is the point-of-view camerawork. We see everything from Oscar’s eyes, with the screen actually going black when he blinks. It is him we see whenever he looks into the mirror. At one point Oscar tries something referred to as DMT, and we see visuals similar to, but a lot more advanced than, the iTunes visualiser. Oscar’s beautiful younger sister Linda (Paz de la Huerta) doesn’t approve of his lifestyle, and is seeing the decidedly dodgy owner of the strip club where she works. Then Oscar dies and, as his spirit leaves his body, we continue to see things from his point-of-view. Only now we are able to fly all over Tokyo, through space and time, when we go to the France of Oscar and Linda’s past, learning many disturbing things which explain how both siblings ended up the way they did. The camera miraculously floats through walls, over roofs, along alleys, up into the sky, wherever Oscar’s unfortunate spirit goes. Second gimmick. Aleksadr Sokurov once gave an interview about his 99-minute single-take film Russian Ark. When he was asked about the Herculean accomplishment of shooting an entire feature-length film — especially one as visually rich as Russian Ark — in a single take, he 48 responded by saying that that aspect of it was just a gimmick, the MARCH 6-12 2011
acid test When a filmmaker uses such overpowering gimmicks, then it must be very tricky not to let them take over the most important aspect of the film: the storytelling
Arty movies you almost didn’t understand: 1. Memento 2. Irreversible 3. Breathless 4. A Clockwork Orange 5. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Enter the Void somehow seems to suffer from a chronic lack of substance. Or, perhaps, from too much of it — there is so much going on with the flashbacks and the flying around, it’s hard to tell which.
movie was much more than that. But I really don’t know if I can say the same for Enter the Void. Although initially the movie is visually stimulating, at some point the endless floating through walls begins to get annoying. There is plenty of production and postproduction wizardry that has gone into this film, but the result gets tedious by the time you finally reach the 161st minute of it. I don’t think that every movie needs to a life-changing experience, and Noe touches on a lot of really interesting subjects in the movie, but Enter the Void somehow seems to suffer from a chronic lack of substance. Or, perhaps, from too much of it — there is so much going on with the flashbacks and the flying around, it’s hard to tell which. When a filmmaker uses such overpowering gimmicks, then it must be very tricky not to let them take over the most important aspect of the film: the storytelling. I feel Gasper Noe failed to do so.
49 MARCH 6-12 2011
REVIEW
film a cracked crystal ball NADIR HASSAN
Like a new Rolling Stones album, late-period Woody Allen movies are to be dreaded, not anticipated. With a few exceptions like Scoop and Vicky Cristina Barcelona, for the last 20 years Allen’s output has been dire. His prolific work ethic is part of the problem. There is a reason why directors like Terence Malick average a movie a decade. By insisting on writing and directing a film a year, Allen’s diminishing returns are now threatening to overwhelm his back catalogue. Along with his knack for dialogue, Allen has also lost his gift for characterisation. All his movies have at least one prototype Allen character — a fussy, intellectual, slightly unattractive man who gets the most beautiful women imaginable. But they were always surrounded by supporting characters who, if not exactly real, fit perfectly in the Allen universe. In his latest film, You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger, though, Allen creates a bunch of clones. The best thing to say about You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger is that it has a fantastic cast. Gemma Jones stars as a woman slowly watching her family disintegrate. Her husband Anthony Hopkins has taken up with Lucy Punch, a prostitute who is half his age and has twice his cunning. Jones’ daughter (Naomi Watts) and son-inlaw (Josh Brolin) have suitably Allen-esque professions. She is an aspiring art dealer who wants to leave her husband for Antonio Banderas while he is the clichéd struggling novelist obsessed with his neighbour, Frieda Pinto. Rarely has such a fine cast been so badly misused. The plot is a retread of Husbands and Wives, a Woody Allen classic. But the philandering in Husbands and Wives had a point to it. The emotional stakes were high and lives were at stake. In You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger no one expects fidelity, no one practices fidelity and so no one cares when infidelity takes place. When the actors yell and scream, they seem to do so with a wink and a shrug, as if this is what they are expected to do in a situation when they are being betrayed rather than something that is genuine. If 50 the characters don’t care about their marriages, why should we? MARCH 6-12 2011
hometown glory When filming in his beloved New York City became too expensive for Allen, he shifted locales; but he has no feel for London and it shows Allen’s decision to base his recent movies, including this one, in London was a mercenary one and it shows. When filming in his beloved New York City became too financially burdensome he shifted locales. But he has no feel for the city and, unlike in his best movies, London is just a place where these characters happen to live. It is not a fully-fledged character in its own right. You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger begins with a voiceover quoting Macbeth. The reader is informed, “Life is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.” It is meant as a comment on the emptiness of the characters’ lives. As the film draws to a close with several dangling plots that seemed to have been forgotten, it suddenly dawns on you that Shakespeare was offering an advance review of You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger.
book strike a pose BY MUNA KHAN
Julia Roberts will vie to play the lead, it will be set amidst magnificent views of the mountainous western US coast and the dialogue will be more schmaltzy than the book; it will attract yogis by the hordes, just like single women veered towards Eat Pray Love. Whatever comes of it, I am certain that the book, Poser, My life in 23 Yoga Poses by Claire Dederer, is better than whatever movie version will undoubtedly be made (read mauled) out of it. Although the idea of a memoir by a yoga devotee may make you want to barf as it did me, Dederer’s book is clever, witty and devoid of any of the earnestness found in a yoga studio. It’s not yoga per se that grates on one’s nerves (OK, my nerves) it’s the yoga culture, yoga journals, yoga tea (yes, yoga tea for crying out loud!), yoga retreats, people dropping out of XYZ careers to become yoga teachers and so forth. (You must admit you know at least one yoga teacher which is more than you did last year.) And, if you frequent the West, the hysteria with which yoga has been absorbed is somewhat frightening, if not worthy of the sneers we in this part of the world—you know the part that err…created yoga — bestow upon yogis. So it was with mild trepidation that I decided to take a crack at Poser—and was pleasantly surprised, nay relieved, that it was not anywhere near the vomit-inducing stuff I expected. In fact, it is funny in a self-deprecating way. Dederer talks about her life in a Seattle suburb, belonging to an elite group of superparents who eat organic (but of course) and use phrases like ‘be mindful of the dog’ instead of ‘beware of the dog’. Naturally, everyone was a yogi, but Dederer wasn’t sold: “I thought yoga was done by self-indulgent middle-aged ladies with a lot of time on their hands, or by skinny fanatical twenty-two-year-old vegetarian former gymnasts. I was also unsettled by the notion of white people seeking transformation through the customs of brownskinned people.” Obviously Dederer changes her mind when she embarks on Hatha yoga to heal a back pain that results from feeding her
easy breezy Dederer writes about life transformations and the origins of yoga poses in the same breezy manner in which she tells us about her attempts to do the full splits daughter. Her journey, so to speak, is about her relationship with yoga, told through the poses she attempts, and the lesson(s) she takes away from those poses. Mothers may relate to much of what she writes—insofar as relates to challenges associated with child rearing—but readers will still be able to relate to her reflections on, say her mother’s decisions and how they impacted Dederer, or how she struggles to deal with what she perceives as the loss of her professional persona. As we learn about Dederer’s life transformations—children, parents, husband, relocations—we also learn about yoga itself. What is the child’s pose, for instance, and where does it come from? It is told in the same carefree breezy manner in which she tells us about her attempts to do the full splits. It does not induce vomit like other popular writing on yoga does simply because Dederer is honest when she writes about the frustrations with poses and then joyous when she writes about conquering them. Much like I was about this memoir. a MARCH 6-12 2011
51
POLITICALLYINCORRECT
a model
citizen
BY AA SHEIKH
Dear Diary,
I’m so sorry I haven’t written lately. You see last time I used
a pen I chipped the fingernail on my pinky. It was awful! Next day at the Sux All-Stars Fashion Show I had to do the ramp with my hand covered. It’s really hard to catwalk like that, but I did it
anyways coz the show must go on and also coz the proceeds were pretty good. Anyways, from now on I’m just gonna diary on my Strawberry. I just love gadgets! It’s easier and good as long as I don’t chip my fingernails on that too. Also, I’ll talk to my agent
and maybe get my fingernails insured. I have my nose insured af-
ter all, for five million rupees. And my knees and calves. What’s a girl without her fingernails! Dear Diary,
I don’t believe in rivalry, only healthy competition. That’s coz
I’m easily better than anyone else in the business. But to my hor-
ror I found out today that Haseena Farzeena is 2.7 cm taller than me and weighs 4.3 gms less! Now I’m thinking I gotta take her
out and stuff her with Maxdonald’s double ones. And tons of choco-chip ice cream. Also, I’ll ask my agent if we can have her target-killed or something. I’ll put this on the to-do list on my Strawberry.
Dear Diary,
I don’t like being invited to talk shows and stuff. I mean, the
exposure’s good but then you have to answer questions and talk
about things you know nothing about — which basically includes everything except make-up techniques. Sometimes you can pull it off but not always. Last night, for instance, this wigged, big-
time comedian/host asked me about politics in the country. I told him that politics is a good thing and every country should have a lot of it. Everyone laughed at that. He asked if all politicians
and ministers should honestly declare their assets. I said that as
52 MARCH 6-12 2011
a supermodel I loved my assets and openly declared them at ev-
ery fashion show and photo-shoot. If you have it, flaunt it! I was
being totally serious but again, they all laughed like crazy. He then asked me if I can be a considered a role model for the youth
of Pakistan. I didn’t quite get the question and in my puzzlement I replied, a model is a model whether you roll her or not. He laughed till tears poured down his surgically-enhanced cheeks. Without quite knowing why, I laughed too. My agent later told
me that they were not laughing with me, they were laughing at me. I’ll never go to that show again! Dear Diary,
I’m getting sick of journalists! I had my 493rd glossy mag inter-
view yesterday and it was the same things What do I think of the fashion scene? When
all
over
again.
will I marry? Are me and Pyara Khan really
just friends? Why do I hate Haseena Farzeena
and Dosheeza Laziza so much? Ho hum. They
never ask anything interesting or original and
when they do they just don’t get my answers. The
one yesterday asked me about women empowerment
in the country, for instance. I smiled. I said I was aware of
the power crisis and women actually need more electricity than
men: think of all the hair dryers, the hair-straighteners, the
electric toe massagers and hair removers and sundry vibrating instruments. The journalist just looked at me with her mouth wide open. And what’s the fuss about load-shedding anyway, I
added. If people don’t have electricity, let them use generators!
At this she just left. How rude! And her dress was horrid too: no sense of latest colour trends!
If it weren’t for the sexy pics that go with them, I think I’d just
quit giving interviews! Bah! a
23 53 MARCH 6-12 2011
UP NORTH AND PERSONAL The Screech Owl across the orchard is in the throes of a seven year itch: it’s been 14 years since her first decibel-defying event eruption, which was followed by a second one seven years later. And now apparently, the designated term has expired, and she has revved up her always simmering venom. The sight of the man I’d hired to trim back — not cut down
— some scraggly Robinia trees on the boundary where her land
meets mine was the spark that ignited her extremely short fuse: “Stop it! Stop it right now!” she shrieked in a voice that could be
heard a million miles away. “These are my trees and you are not to touch them”.
Making a hasty retreat from droplets of saliva rocketing in his
direction like spit missiles, the man asked me to speak to her but,
friendly
neighbourhoo
not being in the mood for confrontation, I told to him finish for the day. The next morning, I approached my screechy neighbour.
“What’s the problem?” I asked with a smile, having decided
that harsh words would only fuel her madness. “Screech, screech, screeeeeech!”
“Okay, okay. Calm down please and explain what it is you’re so
angry about.”
“My trees,” she spluttered having turned purple in the face from
screeching. “You’re not to touch my trees. I want them for firewood.”
“But they are not your trees,” I tried to explain as, hands on
hips, she glowered threateningly, bunching her fists and taking two very purposeful steps forward. Having witnessed those fists
in action, I sensibly stepped back, struggling to retain a calm façade but feeling it slip away under the potential onslaught.
I tried again. “Calm down and listen for a minute,” I requested. “Screech, screech, screeeeeech”.
“Okay. Shut up and damn well listen to me!” I fired back, mak-
ing my stand. “That is my land, those are my trees so stop carrying on.”
“Screeeeeech!”
“Shut up, woman. See that wall?” I said, pointing at the dry
stone dyke on one side of my orchard. “That is my wall as you al-
ready know. Those trees are growing out of the top of my wall and
they are my trees and I have them trimmed back every single year so that they don’t block sunlight from entering my garden. My wall, my trees, my firewood and if you have any problems with
that then go see the patwari, go consult a lawyer, but leave me alone.”
“Screeeeeech!”
“Look. You know perfectly well that my ‘lata’ shows that my
boundary is here so, like I said, go talk to the patwari or a lawyer
long verandah, arms tightly folded across her chest, mouth in-
And with that, I adjusted my Indiana Jones hat against the per-
myself, stomped inside and put on the kettle vowing that I would
but leave me alone.”
54
Clockwise from left: Rose hellebores, Daffodils and Barbie.
sistent drizzle, marched home, picked up the saw, put on strong
leather gloves and — as she stood watching from the shelter of her MARCH 6-12 2011
verted like an upside down bucket — I finished pruning the trees not let her get me down.
Actually, one really should feel sorry for the Screech Owl as
once they are past infancy, are exactly the same.
Sometimes there’s only one way to deal with an irate neighbour. TEXT & PHOTOGRAPHS BY ZAHRAH NASIR
Her home — and yes, I have had occasion to visit — oozes sadness
and despair and her largely neglected land is the epitome of misery: unhealthy grass, dying trees, very little bird life, lots of garbage and an overall impression of sourness. It is a sad place. Her
ingrained anger is not poverty-related although when it comes to
having friends she is poverty-stricken indeed. Over the years she
ood firebrand
has fought with just about everyone on the mountainside. Only in full screeching battle-axe mode can she be described as being
remotely happy, as fury brings bright colour to her cheeks and a corresponding glitter to her dark eyes.
By early afternoon the weather had cleared and, as the Screech
Owl had disturbed me, I sought solace in the awakening garden: a red-throated thrush, a winter migrant from Central Asia, was busily foraging for insects around the pond; the hellebores, glorious in plum, pink, lime-green and white, are in full flower al-
though on far shorter stems than normal, as a result, I think, of the long dry weeks before snow and rain finally arrived. Spring is
definitely in the air, as the first of the daffodils and nargis have just unfurled their petals and, along with the first pink Dutch hyacinth, fill the air with heady perfume and the promise of warmer
days to come. The almond trees are in bud too; they blossomed
way too early last year, opening their delicate flowers as early as
mid-January but are back to ‘normal’ this time around as are the apricots and plums which should, stormy weather and hailstones
permitting, put on a breathtaking display in another couple of weeks or so.
The autumn-sown carrots are ready for pulling, as are black
Russian winter radish and the giant red mustard has suddenly
taken off in the wet, its purple-red leaves growing inches over-
night. There is burgeoning new life everywhere I look. Larkspur seeds are sprouting, sweet Williams popping up alongside Californian poppies and Queen Anne’s lace, there is new growth on the
roses and the forsythias are in bud. The soil is too wet and muddy to disturb right now but, a week of dry weather and I will be able
to throw myself in to a major planting campaign. By the middle
of the month, hopefully, I will have been able to shed some of the heavy four layers of clothing I have waddled around in all winter and what a relief that will be!
Ken and Barbie, a stunning pair of emerald green, turquoise
blue and blazing red ‘yellow-throated green barbettes’ have taken to hanging around from just after dawn until almost sunset in the hope of being fed. They know, from experience, that their
fruit bowl, filled with dried amlok, chopped apples and orange there must be a multitude of reasons as to why she is as she is. Her deep-rooted misery is profound and I don’t think I’ve ever,
since our original meeting almost 15 years ago, seen her smile an open, honest, genuine smile. She grimaces, scowls, frowns and
screeches but never manages to smile and her countless offspring,
segments, is replenished only once early in the morning and that is that. Ever-hopeful they haughtily stare the dogs down and fol-
low me around the garden flying from tree to tree to keep up and, while I am outside, I know that the mynah family will have invaded the kitchen through the open doors but — what the hell — they are part of the family too!
a
MARCH 6-12 2011
55
HOROSCOPE BY SHELLEY VON STRUNCKEL
Aries March 20 - April 19 There’s talk of thrilling ideas. But, frus-
tratingly, your efforts are resulting in encounters with obstacles. That’s because intriguing as new developments are, you’re only just beginning a cycle of astonishing growth in several areas of your life. These unresolved elements from the past may be tedious in the extreme, but tackling them now ensures they won’t slow you down when things really get moving next month.
Taurus April 20 - May 20 Recent contentious encounters with certain individuals have raised questions about the wisdom of
taking things further with them. The actual problem isn’t those Shelley von Strunckel is an internationally acclaimed astrologer who created the first horoscope column for the London Sunday Times in 1992.
you’re dealing with but that unsettling situations have everybody – including you - on edge. If decisions must be made, ensure they’re flexible. After a few quiet days, the pace of change won’t just pick up, what arises is bound to surprise everybody.
A frequent lecturer, she writes daily, weekly and monthly horoscopes in publications around the world including South China Morning Post, The Gulf News, Tatler, French and Chinese Vogue and now The Express Tribune Magazine.
Gemini May 21 - June 20 With both your ruler Mercury and to-
day’s New Moon accenting your work, lifestyle and goals, you’re
questioning things in depth. While it’s clear what must go, your
thinking about the future remains worryingly muddy. That’s as it should be, since with both circumstances and your ideas about
what’s next evolving steadily, your time’s better spent learning about new developments than attempting to improve on existing arrangements.
Cancer June 21 - July 22 You probably begin every day promis-
ing yourself to organise both here-and-now arrangements and your plans for the future. And every evening you’re less sure on
what’s happening. Much as you’d like things settled, life’s cur-
rently about discovery. Since it’s unlikely you’ll be able to make
lasting decisions before late March, focus on exploration. Often, who and what you encounter will prove to be extraordinary.
Leo July 23 - August 22 Even when your views differ from others, you’re able to conduct constructive, if occasionally heated, exchanges. But now it’s obvious your suggestions aren’t welcome.
Actually, you’re better off steering clear of these already confused
situations, since what’s uncertain now will soon become bewildering. Let others make their own mistakes then, when the dust settles later in the month, rejoin them to discuss the future.
Virgo August 23 – September 22 Infuriatingly, lately, your advice has been sought, then ignored. But judging by the rather dis-
ruptive planetary activity accenting those asking for your guid-
ance, they’re in a state of overwhelming flux. Knowing that, discuss various options – if only so you remain informed of their
circumstances – then back off. By the Virgo Full Moon on the 19th, things will be more settled, but they’ll also look very dif-
56
ferent. MARCH 6-12 2011
Libra September 23 – October 22 Make patience your byword and you’ll get through this bizarre period unscathed. With both certain situations and almost everybody in the midst of change, you’re investing
countless hours in others’ dramas, only to find the plans you devise change, and frequently with shocking swiftness. Worse, you’re neglecting your own obligations. Deal with them, but avoid serious plans. Your circumstances are no more stable than anybody else’s.
Scorpio October 23 – November 21 Although it may seem others are being difficult for the sake of it, their confusion is actually
the result of equally perplexing situations. The irony is, because you’re currently benefitting from perhaps the most congenial
planetary set up of the twelve signs, you’re immune to others’ dramas. For now. By next weekend things will be far more challenging, and you’ll have far more empathy for others.
Sagittarius November 22 – December 21 Recent financial or prac-
tical difficulties have forced you to alter certain rather exciting arrangements. While this is frustrating, you’ll come up with something better. Tempting as it is to reassure everybody things are now settled, you’d be wrong. Changes are frequent and, for
you, fantastic. But many will be struggling, which means that although you’ll be thriving, you may need to give others a hand.
Capricorn December 22 – January 19 Few things annoy you more than situations in which unexpected developments force
arrangements to be changed at the last minute. Get used to it.
Ultimately the disruptive events that are reshaping your way of living and working, and those of others, will prove worthwhile. For now and the coming month or so, however, expect chaos.
Knowing that, you’ll ensure even the simplest of plans are flexible.
Aquarius January 20 - February 18 Uranus, which is your ruling planet, changes signs only rarely. Consequently, when, on the
12th, its move into Aries and to accent your perspective begins a new cycle of your life. While some of the resulting developments
will surface slowly, others have - and could seem a nuisance. Still, once the changes going on around you settle in, you’ll realise they’re giving you the edge in numerous situations.
Pisces February 19 – March 19 Many of the questions about what works – and what doesn’t – triggered by today’s Pisces New Moon
have already been dealt with. But some are so vague they’re unrecognisable, at least for now, which means being unusually tough about anything you’re currently questioning. What
you feel you can tolerate now will soon become unbearable and,
For more information, to order personal charts and to download & listen to detailed audiocasts, visit www.shelleyvonstrunckel.com
worse, could interfere with the coming months’ remarkable
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new developments.
MARCH 6-12 2011
THE HATER
10 things I hate about ...women
1 2 3 4 5 58
BY AMNA IQBAL
The hormones. I am angelic right now. Yes, you can have my firstborn, my car and my inheritance. I will become demonic, however, when you ask to borrow my pen. I have oestrogen. Deal with it.
6 7 8 9 10
The talking. Let’s talk. It’s four thirty in the morning but I think my boyfriend’s voice inflection on our
forty-third call wasn’t quite right. Please help me figure
this out. Let me take you through all previous forty-two calls first. Your cat just gave birth to stillborn kittens, don’t bottle up your feelings, let’s talk. I think my third fingernail just chipped. Let’s talk.
That time of the month. Everything, from inhaling 67 bars of chocolates to murdering babies, can be
attributed to PMS. That time of the month is the yearlong pass that you have to being a complete beast.
The constant need to be reassured. Do I look fat? Do I
look thin? Is my hair alright? Does he love me? Does he love my mother? I raise six kids, work three jobs, support my great grand-uncle, do you think I am
awesome enough? Are you sure? Are you? Really? No, really?
The lack of physical boundaries. I do not appreciate you being five millimeters away from me while you regale me with your story of how your dentist tells you that your
halitosis is incurable. I WILL bludgeon you if you give me another hug that squashes both of our delicates.
The apparent helplessness. Look at me. I’m as fragile
as the first rosebud of spring. I do not know how to print documents from a word file, I’m not strong
enough to pick up my coffee cup or smart enough to slice bread. Doesn’t that rouse up all your primitive caveman instincts to come protect me?
The feelings. I am a beating heart that feels and a delicate soul that is sensitive to all of my surroundings.
I will reinforce that fact over and over again by bursting into helpless tears at the sight of an old man on the
road, little babies in the park, flowers, burnt popcorn, the color pink, sappy film endings and washing liquid not being drained properly in the dishwasher.
MARCH 6-12 2011
The motherhood. I gave birth. I will now have a saintly halo hovering over my head forever. No, you cannot judge me. I gave birth to you. What do you mean you can’t listen to my criticism of all your life choices, all the time?
The sisterhood. I will borrow your clothes, shoes,
books, friends, boyfriends, underwear. What do you mean I have to ask you, at least? I will claw your face
out if I have a fight with my third best friend because
you’re my resident punching bag. I will claw anyone
else’s face off, however, if they say anything about you.
The womanhood. Mother earth has tied us all into a single spiritual being because of our collective sorrows
and pains. While we’re at it let’s bitch each other out, take any and every opportunity to destroy each others’ lives, steal husbands, beauticians, tailors and make
sure that mother earth writhes in agony every second of her womanly existence.
a