Ms MARCH 15, 2015
ISSUE NO. 143
The height of success
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OCD: not just a quirk in your personality
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inside En vogue —
Ethereal ethnic looks
Domestic goddess — Baked rice pudding
Section In-Charge: Dilaira Dubash Sub-Editors: Amna Hashmi Nisma Chauhan Feedback: women@tribune.com.pk
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The fashion guru Feeha Jamshed
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The buzz
THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, MARCH 15, 2015
Many people believe one’s overall wellbeing is directly proportional to how tall they are, but is this really true? By Natasha Khalid Design by Talha Khan Ever since he was a teenager, Adeel Hamid* has been the centre of everyone’s attention. Over six feet tall, with chocolate brown hair and a porcelain complexion, the 29-year-old banker was sure to turn heads everywhere he went until he chose to marry a girl one foot shorter than himself. Friends and family alike began castigating the couple for their height difference and many even went to the extent of labelling Adeel and his significant other as ‘misfits’. Unfortunately, Adeel’s story hardly constitutes as breaking news. Harsh as it may sound, his experience lends credence to the bitter reality that people are judged by their appearance, no matter how hard they try to prove themselves otherwise. “Honestly, I was rather shocked by how negatively people spoke about my wife (Ushna) and me, just because of our height difference,” says Adeel. This started to take a toll on Ushna’s wellbeing Adeel shares. She started to internalise things and this made her believe she didn’t deserve to be with Adeel. Ushna’s concern is shared by people who are below the average height, which is approximately five feet According to a study by Oxford seven inches for males University which was published and five feet two inches last year, feeling smaller for females in Pakistan reports the averageheight. makes people feel paranoid, co. According to a study mistrustful and more likely to by Oxford University which think that others are staring at was published last year, them or talking about them feeling smaller makes people feel paranoid, mistrustful and more likely to think that others are staring at them or talking about them. The study refers to the problem as ‘short-man syndrome’, also known as the Napoleon complex, and as per the findings, shorter men or women make for a more jealous spouse in comparison to their taller counterparts. ‘Heightism’, a universal term given to the prejudice or discrimination against individuals based on their height is, however, the byproduct of society. From marriage proposals to job interviews, height influences decisions and overshadows the more important aspects of an individual’s personality such as their capabilities and talents. In Pakistan, marriage proposals are sifted through primarily on the basis of looks. Asma Siddiqi*, a 22-year-old student from the University of Karachi, shares the humiliation she had to go through after facing rejection based on her height.
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THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, MARCH 15, 2015
“At a wedding last year, an aunty seeking prospective brides looked at me and remarked ‘if only you were taller’,” she recalls. What is surprising is that even men face similar discrimination, if not in the field of marriage, then in the competitive job market. Malcolm Gladwell, a Canadian journalist and bestselling author, states in his book titled Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking, that most CEOs of 500 Fortune companies are tall men with an average height of above six feet. “Tall men have better jobs, more success with women and more money than their shorter counterparts,” says Gladwell in the context of cultural bias. Unfortunately, society tends to favour taller individuals. “People tend to take tall people more seriously,” explains Areeba Muzzaffer, an intern at the Agha Khan University Hospital (AKUH) in Karachi who is five feet six inches tall. “As soon as you see a short person you can’t help but crack a joke on their height,” she adds. Shahzeb Hassan, a 23-year-old student from the Lahore University of Management Science, agrees with Areeba. At over six feet tall, Shahzeb shares that his height helps him portray a positive self-image and boosts his confidence.
Short height, high achievements Media is filled with examples of short people making it big and breaking the stereotype.
Tom Cruise — At just five feet seven inches, Cruise has been ranked among Empire magazine’s 100 sexiest film stars. He has achieved a number of awards for his breakthrough performances in The Last Samurai, Mission Impossible II and Jerry Maguire. In 2006, Premiere ranked him as Hollywood’s most powerful actor.
Alia Bhatt — This Bollywood diva has gained much critical acclaim for her performance in Imtiaz Ali’s Highway. With only two years in the industry, she has given one hit after the other. At five feet five inches, Bhatt is a style icon for younger girls and continues to inspire them by promoting women empowerment with Vogue India magazine.
Aamir Khan — At five feet five inches Bollywood’s
Parents emphasise on height at a very early age by asking children to drink more milk or engage in certain sports to help them grow tall. Sentences of praise such as ‘mashAllah kitna lamba hogya hai’ are a prime example. Eventually those who don’t gain height end up with a lower self-esteem
perfectionist Aamir Khan has back-to-back blockbusters to his credit. From playing Sanjay Singhania in Ghajini to PK in his 2014 commercial success PK, Khan has time and again proven that success knows no boundaries. He even received international acclaim for his astounding performance in Lagaan which received a nomination for Best Foreign Language Film at the 74th Academy Awards.
Head of psychiatry department at AKUH Dr Aisha Mian
Learn to respect yourself Moreover, personality related issues pertaining to short height stem from culture. According to Dr Aisha Mian, the head of psychiatry department at AKUH, parents emphasise on height at a very early age by asking children to drink more milk or engage in certain sports to help them grow tall. “Sentences of praise such as mashAllah kitna lamba hogya hai (look how tall you have grown) are a prime example,” she adds. Eventually those who don’t gain height end up with a lower self-esteem. In fact, sports or other professions that require people to have a certain height, such as basketball, sumo wrestling or modeling also contribute to disappointment for some who do not meet the height criteria. On the other hand, Dr Nargis Asad, a clinical psychologist at AKUH, says that there are other factors that contribute to lower self-esteem besides one’s height. “There may be people who search for taller spouses but not everyone follows the stereotype,” she adds. People who are shorter consciously enhance other parts of their personality to make up for their height, she adds. For instance, Dr Aisha explains that shorter men, in turn, become louder, more assertive or participate in extra-curricular activities to become more visible. On the other hand, women wear heels or try to make up for their height by excelling in other things. But unlike what many believe, the grass isn’t always greener on the other side. Even tall people have to face their fair share of problems. “With being tall comes the notion that one is more serious, ambitious and logical,” states Dr Aisha. And it can be hard to live up to everyone’s expectations all the time. *Names have been changed to protect privacy.
American poet Robert Frost once said, “Happiness makes up in height for what it lacks in length.” Therefore, to be content with one’s stature one must get rid of the negativity and adorn a more positive self-image. Follow these useful tips to build selfcompassion:
Treat yourself how you would treat others If you think calling someone else short would hurt their feelings then don’t do it to yourself either.
Care about yourself Self-pitying or being paranoid because of one’s height will only stop them from moving ahead in life. If you care about yourself, do what’s right for you rather than what’s harming you.
Reach for your goals Height doesn’t stop you from becoming successful. If you put your mind to something, there is nothing that can stop you from achieving your goal.
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En vogue
Bilal Saleem’s latest collection is ideal for formal events Photographer : Sajid Sid Coordination : Loop Makeup : Zara Designer : Bilal Saleem at Parekh Model : Fiza and Farah
THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, MARCH 15, 2015
THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, MARCH 15, 2015
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Fahad Hussayn’s latest collection will make you feel like a star Coordination: Umer Mushtaq Hair and Make-up: Saima Rasheed Designer: Fahad Hussayn Photography and Styling: Alee’ Hassan Model: Emili
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Lifestyle
THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, MARCH 15, 2015
By Ans Khurram | If you put up a Facebook status asking people if any friends or family members suffer from Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), you would be surprised to see how many people respond. People often say friends who demonstrate the slightest rigidity in behaviour suffer from OCD. If you wash your hands repeatedly or are particular
What is the difference between OCD and OCPD? Most people confuse Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) with Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD). These two terms are not interchangeable. OCPD is a personality disorder that results from a chronic, maladaptive pattern of dealing with life. Symptoms include orderliness, perfectionism and excessive attention to details, a need to exercise power over one’s environment, a workaholic nature and miserliness. Patients suffering from OCPD feel a satisfaction so great by performing their rituals that they often do so at the expense of leisure activities and friendship. While people who suffer from OCD view their habits as unhealthy and unwanted, patients of OCPD tend to believe their behaviour is rational and desirable.
about the arrangement of things, you might be branded OCD. The term has devolved to become synonymous with qualities that are generally deemed undesirable. According to Sumeira Siddiqui, an MPhil in Psychology and a Student Wellness Counselor at Ghulam Ishaq Khan Institute in Khyber Pakhtunkhwa, OCD is an anxiety disorder where a person suffers from recurring obsessions and compulsions. “Obsessions are thoughts, images and ideas that don’t go away,” she explains. “Compulsions are behaviours that one feels he/she absolutely has to carry out in order to get rid of the anxiety.” Pop culture references play a part in misconceptions about the disorder. Hollywood put forward the idea of ‘repeated hand washing syndrome’ while some marketing firms referred to the disorder in advertisements (‘Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics’). Articles such as ‘33 Meticulous Cleaning Tricks for the OCD Person Inside You’ are commonly shared and contribute to perceptions about the disorder. But OCD is not limited to hand washing or hygiene preferences. “I have my own set of idiosyncrasies,” says 23-year-old Safi, who suffers from OCD. “For instance, if a manhole cover is improperly positioned, I absolutely have to fix it.” Informally written sentences infuriate Safi and he cannot stand writing anything poorly, thus making him an extremely slow writer. Some OCD sufferers take extreme measures to satisfy their obsessions and compulsions. For instance, 22-year-old trainee engineer Zahid Hamid* believes he has to stay away from the colour red and must repeat certain phrases or words eight
Design by Eesha Azam to 16 times. “The number of times that I repeated these words or phrases had to be an even number — while closing doors, for example, I touch the doorknob eight times. If something goes wrong, I feel compelled to start over to get any relief or satisfaction.” Many times, sufferers do not realise the severity of their anxiety, largely due to lack of information about OCD and the tendency to discredit psychological disorders in Pakistan. Zahid was diagnosed with OCD in 2006 even though he exhibited symptoms as a child. He believed that if he tossed an object in the air and caught it, he was preventing his parents from dying. Even if they were not in any
instance, if an OCD-sufferer checks the lock on his or her door when leaving the house once, this is called ‘exposure’; preventing the OCD person from going back to the door and repeatedly checking the lock is called ‘ritual prevention’. Through ritual prevention, the patient becomes used to the anxiety-producing situation and discovers that his or her anxiety level has reduced. Safi says he overcame his obsession with good hand-writing with a few simple remedies. “In school, I took lectures on topics I found extremely interesting and during these lectures, I would force myself
imminent danger, the thought of his parents dying was a constant source of anxiety and the only way to relieve this anxiety was to perform a set of actions repeatedly. As severe as the disorder may seem, there are treatment options available to overcome the obsessions and the compulsions. Treatments for OCD include therapy and medication. “The specific therapy technique used is called Exposure and Ritual Prevention (ERP),” says Sumeira. “This involves gradually learning to tolerate the anxiety associated with not performing the ritual behaviour.” For
to take extensive notes,” he says. As a result, the part of his brain which found the lectures interesting dominated the part that compelled him to write perfectly and slowly. Zahid did not undergo any specific treatment and he believes his lack of formal treatment was largely due to misconceptions about the disorder. An understanding of the different manifestations of this disorder, therefore, could help people understand its severity and complexity. *Name has been changed to protect privacy.
Domestic goddess 7
THE EXPRESS TRIBUNE, MARCH 15, 2015
By Gulnaz Mondegarian
Baked rice pudding
The health benefits of baked foods? Warm up your night with this classic baked sweet-dish
The delightful aroma of freshly baked bread or a slow-cooking chicken roast might be reason enough to utilise your oven regularly but have you ever wondered how baked foods affect our health? As with all other forms of cooking, baking has its own set of advantages and disadvantages but is it really more beneficial than frying or grilling. Read on to find out!
Advantages:
Ingredients • • • • •
Rice 1/2 cup Milk 2 cups Cream 1 and 1/2 cup Butter 2 tbsp Sugar 1/4 or 1/2 cup (depending on personal preference) • Vanilla essence 1 tsp • Cinnamon powder 1/2 tsp
• Nutrient retention: As baking uses dry-heat instead of water, it prevents the loss of minerals and water-soluble nutrients such as Vitamins B and C which are depleted during boiling. Also, in a study published by the Journal of Food Science in March 2009 baking resulted in the lowest loss of antioxidant activity in green beans, celery and carrots. Frying, boiling and pressure-cooking lead to the most loss. • Decreased amount of fats: Baking requires little added fat (oils, for example) and if you use a roasting rack, most of the grease will drain out automatically during cooking. In fact, you can bake anything without using any oil, including meat, vegetables and even packaged French fries and burger patties.
Disadvantages:
Method • Cook the rice in boiling water for about five minutes. Once it is cooked, drain the pot and set the rice aside to cool. • In a separate saucepan, mix the milk, cream, sugar, cinnamon powder, vanilla essence and butter together and boil the mixture for a few minutes. Keep stirring continuously. • After the mixture cools down, add in the rice and bake it in a preheated oven at 165o C for about an hour. Be sure to cover the dish with foil before baking. • Serve warm.
• Increased amount of trans fats: Many bakers and frozen-food manufacturers use trans fats to extend the shelf-life of their items. Unfortunately, trans fats — a type of unsaturated fat that behaves like a saturated fat because of its chemical structure — are a form of unhealthy cholesterol and lowers the level of healthy fat in your body, making you more vulnerable to heart diseases, strokes and diabetes. • Destruction of heat-sensitive substances: Using fluids such as stock during cooking kills nutrients. In addition to this, baking exposes foods to extremely high temperatures. This gives rise to acrylamide, a carcinogen produced during the cooking process. Lowering the temperature can help avoid this but then be prepared for a longer cooking time! • Retention of refined sugars and flour: Commercial baked products and even home-made ones are likely to be rich in refined sugar and flour which have already undergone processing (during manufacturing) and lost a lot of their nutrients. These are considered to be unhealthy carbohydrates which are quickly metabolised and boost blood sugar, weight gain, diabetes and heart diseases. Whole-grain flour, brown sugar or a reduced amount of sugar are good alternatives if you find it difficult to keep away from baked foods.
SOURCES: EHOW.COM/
Woman of the week 8 e world A glimpse into th rhouses we po i of Pakistan
At Sheherba no Taseer’s wedding brun ch.
With my husband, Nadir Zia.
Fashion Designer
With Amar Faiz.
While washing hair may not seem like rocket science, there is (or at least, should be) much more to it than simply lathering on some shampoo and rinsing it off. A proper hair wash routine requires much more than that but most of us remain blissfully unaware of this fact. t. We continue to follow our misguided washing techniques without realising how detrimental they can be to the hair and hair follicles. Read d on to find out about the six most common blunders we make when it comes to our hair and how we can avoid them for a healthier mane. e. Give it a break: We are all clean-freaks when it comes to hair but did you know that daily washing can take away hair’s natural shine, thanks to the strong chemicals mixed in commercial shampoos? According to hair experts, natural oils are produced by the scalp and reach till the ends of your hair, making them look shiny and healthy. Regular wear and tear causes the oils to deplete. If you are worried about grease, try a dry shampoo or water and restyle them with a blow dry.
Stick to one shampoo: Switching from one shampoo to another might be okay once in a while but regular switching — or even using two or more different shampoos at one time — affects hair adversely. As time goes by, your hair gradually builds tolerance to the special product you are using. However, if you suffer from oily hair or style them frequently using sticky products, then a switch to a clarifying shampoo once every couple of weeks could do you good.
Don’t overdo it: You are overdoing oing the washing when you apply the equal amount of shampoo and ds conditioner from scalp till the ends d of your hair. Experts recommend focusing the shampoo on your scalp and conditioning just the midshaft of each strand to the ends. This ensures that the moisture reaches where it is needed most and also protects against excess build up and residue on the skin.
Always use conditioner: Don’t underestimate the power of conditioner because without it, your hair will be limp, dry and dull. Adequate conditioning after every wash will boost your hair’s strength and volume, especially if the conditioner is of the same brand as the shampoo. In fact, conditioner also cuts down on friction and breakage when you brush your hair. Using only conditioner to wash your hair may not result in the thorough cleaning of a shampoo but will leave the hair feeling and looking nice.
No to hot showers: It may be cold outside and as relaxing as a hot shower may seem, it can actually distress your hair further. Heat tends to open the pores on the scalp and a hot water wash doesn’t allow the pores to close down once the hair has been washed. Cold water, on the other hand, is more relaxing to the skin and closes the pores. The best option for you is to take a warm shower and at the end, rinse your hair with cold water for about 30 seconds. This will also lock in essential moisture needed for healthy tresses.
Let the dye stay: Unnecessary rinsing of dyed hair will shorten the life-time of the hair colour. Coloured hair tends to absorb and release water much easily so avoid washing it too much, especially with hot water as heat makes the colour fade faster.
Design by Talha Khan