CityBeat | Nov. 4, 2009 by Chava Communications

CONTENTS

513-281-8400

VOLUME 15 • ISSUE 53

tickets still available!

nov 5 • 6:30pm

nov 8 • 6:30pm

VOICES

NEWS

TO DO PICKS

MUSIC

ARTS

DINER

FILM

CLASSIFIEDS

COVER STORY 18

Around and Around We Go:

If you don’t like I-275 just keep driving — you’ll be back where you started in about two hours.

Cover photo illustration and design: Rebecca Sylvester

ONLINE CITYBEAT.COM PHOTO GALLERIES

HIKE OF THE WEEK

This week’s featured hike: Withrow Nature Preserve

BLOGS

Election Day coverage, Clifton Cultural Arts Center lights up, CEA votes are mounting

PODCASTS

#34: Adventures along I-275 Guided tour of Roaring Tiger, Leaping Carp with Cincinnati Art Museum Curator Hou-Mei Sung

nov 25 • 7pm all time low

Glamour Kills tour featuring w/ we the Kings, hey monday, the Friday night Boys

nov 28 • 7pm

insane Clown posse w/ (hed)p.e., the Dayton Family, Dead Dirty Carnies

nov 29 • 7pm

november 04-10, 2009

matisyahu w/ soja dec 3 • 8pm an evening with emilie autumn fri • dec 4 • 8pm 96 rock sickest Xmas ever featuring siCK puppies

w/ rev theory, adelitas way

dec 15 • 7:30pm

For a Complete list oF shows, Visit liVenation.Com charge by phone: 1-877-598-8703 • bogart’s box office is now open every mon-fri from 12-5pm & always open on show days at 2pm • tickets also available at shake it records

ONLINE COLUMNS

I Shall Be Released: New CDs from Sean Lennon, The Swimmers, Mission of Burma and Los Cenzontles with David Hidalgo and Taj Mahal

MUSIC TOWN MESSAGE BOARD

MULTIMEDIA SHOWS

nov 10 • 8pm

Lots of photos from voting on Election Day and waiting for results on Election Night

Another tour that isn’t stopping in Cincinnati, Chuck Biscuits RIP, Dead Musicians Society at Molly Malone’s and Funk Rock band looking for a “kick azz” guitarist

811 Race Street • Fifth Floor • Cincinnati, OH 45202 Phone: 513.665.4700 • Sales/Business Fax: 513.665.4368 • Editorial Fax: 513.665.4369 Email Contacts

Music Listings: music@citybeat.com

Billing/Accounting: jdorsey@citybeat.com

News Tips: pork@citybeat.com

Events Listings: calendar@citybeat.com

General Info/Questions: letters@citybeat.com

Feedback/Letters: editor@citybeat.com

Advertising: bkitzmiller@citybeat.com

CityBeat Staff: first initial of first name

Dear Maija: dearmaija@citybeat.com

Web Site: cknight@citybeat.com

followed by last name @citybeat.com

MANAGING EDITOR Jason Gargano

PRODUCTION ARTISTS Jason Kidwell, Patty Robisch, Rebecca Sylvester

BUSINESS MANAGER Jeff Dorsey

ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT EDITOR Mike Breen

OFFICE MANAGER Sara Beiting

NEWS EDITOR Kevin Osborne

PHOTOGRAPHERS Jon Hughes, Sean Hughes, Joe Lamb, Emily Maxwell, Kurt Strecker

ACCOUNTING ASSISTANT Benita Woodall

ASSOCIATE EDITORS Danny Cross, Maija Zummo

CARTOONISTS Derf, Jerry Dowling, Tom Tomorrow

MARKETING AND PROMOTIONS MANAGER Dan McCabe

CONTRIBUTING EDITORS Rick Pender, Theater; Steven Rosen, Art; Heather Smith, Dining

ILLUSTRATORS Matthew Hamby, Woodrow J. Hinton III, Oliver Meinerding, Darin Overholser

MARKETING AND PROMOTIONS COORDINATOR Dylan Speeg

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Reyan Ali, Lora Arduser, Anne Arenstein, Brian Baker, Jacob Baynham, Kevin Britton, Stephen Carter-Novotni, Chris Charlson, Brian Cross, Matthew Cunningham, Jane Durrell, Larry Gross, Feoshia Henderson, Ric Hickey, Julie Hotchkiss, Ben L. Kaufman, Angela Kilduff, Katie Laur, Laura Leffler, C.A. MacConnell, Dave Malaska, Tom McElfresh, Ryan McLendon, Christine Mersch, Anne Mitchell, Matt Morris, Tamera Lenz Muente, Julie Mullins, Rodger Pille, Rich Shivener, Adam Sievering, Sarah Stephens, tt stern-enzi, Elena Stevenson, Isaac Thorn, Tana Weingartner, Joe Wessels, P.F. Wilson

NEW MEDIA DIRECTOR AND GESTICULATOR Cameron Knight

CIRCULATION MANAGER Steve Ferguson

SALES MANAGER Brian Kitzmiller

DISTRIBUTION TEAM Tom Sand, Jack McCarthy, Tim Meyer, Ben Davis, Bill Hartmann, Kyle Trittipo, Denny Schlabach, Matt Luken, Andy Dodge, Glen Jones, Gary Skitt, Kristen McClanhan, Tracie Maglosky

SALES ACCOUNT MANAGERS Betsy Hodges, Tony Frank, Brittany Huffman, Adam Runyan, Max Yamson OPERATIONS & PRODUCT DEVELOPMENT MANAGER Chuck Davis ADVERTISING COORDINATOR Tracy Walker

EDITORIAL INTERNS Jim Cunningham, Eric Johnson, Jac Kern, Rachel Rayburn, Peter Robertson

GENERAL MANAGER/CO-PUBLISHER Dan Bockrath EDITOR/CO-PUBLISHER John Fox

Cincinnati CityBeat is published every Wednesday by Lightborne Publishing Inc., Thomas R. Schiff, Chief Executive Officer. CityBeat covers news, public issues, arts and entertainment of interest to readers in Greater Cincinnati and Northern Kentucky. The views expressed in these pages do not necessarily represent those of the publishers. One copy per person of the current issue is free; additional copies, including back issues up to one year, are available at our offices for $1 each. Entire contents are copyright 2009 Lightborne Publishing Inc. and may not be reprinted in whole or in part without prior written permission from the publishers. SUBSCRIPTIONS: $70 for six months, $130 for one year (delivered via first–class mail).

all dates, acts and ticket prices subject to change without notice. a service charge is added to each ticket.

DEADLINES: Calendar listings information, noon Wednesday before publication; classified advertising, 4 p.m. Monday

4-pack offers are available for every bogart’s show at livenation.com while supplies last

WAREHOUSING SERVICES: Harris Motor Express, 4261 Crawford St., Cincinnati, OH 45223.

Member of the Association of Alternative Newspapers

before publication; display advertising, noon Friday before publication. Next issue will be published Nov. 11, 2009.

WWW.CITYBEAT.COM

WWW.BESTOFCINCINNATI.COM

Printed on Recycled Paper with Soy-Based Inks

november 04-10, 2009

VOICES

4PORKOPOLIS BY KEVIN OSBORNE

Election Aftermath, Teabaggers and a Politicized Prosecutor

elieve it or not, Cincinnati City Councilwoman Leslie Ghiz is a nice person. I’ve been covering Ghiz as a reporter and columnist since her first council campaign, back in 2005. On a personal level, she can be funny and intelligent and prone to uttering newsworthy quotes. Like every public official I’ve covered, sometimes I agree with her, sometimes I don’t. But one memorable thing about Ghiz was she didn’t fit the standard Cincinnati mold of a Republican politician. While fiscally conservative and anti-abortion, she parted ways with the GOP on some social issues. An example is gay rights: Ghiz was frequently endorsed by the Log Cabin Republicans and Equality Cincinnati, something that would never happen to her GOP colleagues like Chris Monzel and Charlie Winburn, council members who have more in common politically with Carl Lindner Jr. and Glenn Beck. In fact, Ghiz once dated City Councilman John Cranley, a dyed-in-the-wool Democrat, before each married other people. Anyone who spoke with her knew she was genuinely interested in making Cincinnati a better city. That Leslie Ghiz, however, has been nowhere to be seen in this year’s City Council

elections. Instead, we’ve been treated to a much harder-edged, angry and occasionally rude candidate. The biggest symptom of this change was the much-publicized “Twitter-gate” involving Ghiz tweeting during council meetings — usually about Democratic Councilwoman Laketa Cole. The caustic comments Ghiz micro-blogged provided something akin to a circus sideshow fascination this summer and fall. One of her tamer comments from a meeting was, “Council majority is trying to pull a fast one. Won’t allow vote on property tax rollback until after the election.” The whole affair erupted Oct. 26 when Ghiz told Cole “You never shut up” after Cole barred Ghiz from speaking at a committee meeting. It all has a distinctly Desperate Housewives vibe, a distraction from real issues and rational debate. I don’t believe for one minute this is the real Ghiz. Like many political observers, I think she’s trying to appear more conservative and combative than she truly is, in preparation for campaigning to become a Hamilton County commissioner next year. After all, she’ll have to appeal to voters in places like Sharonville, Colerain Township and Reading, who seem to

enjoy Rush Limbaugh-style politicians. By the time this column is published, the election will be over and readers will know whether Ghiz made it back to council to serve a third term. In all likelihood she will, and it’ll serve as a great platform to make headlines while she ramps up a commission campaign in 2010. Let’s take a look at her probable challengers for the seat David Pepper is vacating, according to sources in the Democratic and Republican parties. On the GOP side, the name most frequently mentioned is Sycamore Township Trustee Tom Weidman. He’s best known as campaign manager for his good friend, Phil Heimlich, during his unsuccessful 2006 reelection bid for county commissioner. Another possibility is Jeff Ritter, a Convergys Corp. employee who’s been a Colerain Township trustee since 2006, and Sharonville Mayor Virgil Lovitt II, who’s teamed up with Hamilton County Commissioner Todd Portune, a Democrat, on a few issues. Some people have also talked about State Sen. Bill Seitz (R-Green Township) running for the commission seat, but insiders said he has no intention of leaving his position in Columbus. On the Democratic side, potential candidates include Cranley, current City Councilwoman Roxanne Qualls, Harrison Mayor Joel McGuire and Whitewater Township Trustee Hubert Brown. Although we all might be burned out on elections right now, recharge your batteries. The 2010 campaign already has begun. ✽✽✽✽✽

✽✽✽✽✽ “So, if you’re serious about eliminating wasteful spending, what about the Sheriff’s Office?” That’s the question I’d like to ask Hamilton County Prosecutor Joe Deters after he persuaded 11 local judges earlier this month to sign a letter ordering Hamilton County commissioners to fire the private law firm that handles riverfront development issues. Deters said the Prosecutor’s Office can offer the same legal services for commissioners without incurring millions of dollars in outside fees. The county is facing a budget crunch and has been laying off some workers, furloughing others and cutting some services since earlier this year. The county commission hired the private lawyers in 1997 to help oversee construction of the Reds and Bengals stadiums as well as The Banks project. It was done, commissioners said, because the Prosecutor’s Office botched lease negotiations with the Bengals. That lease was widely criticized for the lavish perks it gave to the team, which now is putting the county in a financial bind. But Deters maintains that Ohio law allows commissioners to hire attorneys only as long as the fees don’t exceed the prosecutor’s annual salary in each year. About $11 million has been spent so far. Commissioners dispute Deters’ interpretation and believe his action violates rules set by the Ohio Supreme Court. A local attorney asked to comment on the incident said the Prosecutor’s Office probably wasn’t up to handling the intricate details of lease negotiations but any rationale for using outside attorneys has expired. Deters wants to give the public perception of cuts before his office will likely face reductions next year, the attorney added. That may well be, but why does the Sheriff’s Office also need an attorney on its staff? If Deters is serious about cuts, he needs to offer his services to Simon Leis and ask Leis to boot his attorney. PORKOPOLIS TIP LINE: 513-665-4700 (ext. 147) or pork@citybeat.com

november 04-10, 2009

Mike Wilson, the leader of the Cincinnati Tea Party movement, has decided to seek political office next year and held a fundraiser Nov. 4. (See, you thought I was exaggerating above.) A Springfield Township resident, Wilson wants to challenge State Rep. Connie Pillich (D-Montgomery) for the Ohio 28th District seat in 2010. In a statement to supporters, Wilson said he plans on running as a “Tea Party Republican.” It’s unclear, though, whether he intends on seeking the GOP’s endorsement, which some party leaders are ambivalent about, or to be listed as an independent on the ballot. A campaign Web site states, “In the end, impacting policy means affecting elections. Some of us will run, others will offer their support, but all of us will be needed to break the cycle of politics as usual. Mike’s opponent raised over $130,000 dollars (much of it from union sources) for her race in 2008. Mike has set a

target of $30,000 before the end of the year to get off to a good start and to demonstrate that this is a serious challenge.” Admission to Wilson’s fundraiser was $32.50 per person, or $55 per couple. Regardless of whether Wilson reaches his funding goal, someone should remind him of the 28th District’s location. The fundraiser was held at Willie’s Sports Café in West Chester, which lies outside district boundaries.

4living out loud

november 04-10, 2009

My car had been making a monster-like noise for weeks. I put on my Super Mechanic Woman Thinking Cap, so I knew it was steering or brakes, and I tried to ignore it, but I was getting worried. Finally, this past Saturday, the noise was too loud to cover up by cranking up the stereo. Of course, I picked a Saturday to freak out, and my normal garage wasn’t open. So I headed to the closest place, a tiny tire joint I’d never even noticed before: Twilight Zone Tire. The gruff guy with a Boston accent said they’d get to it before closing. It was 1 p.m. They closed at 6. I was in for the long haul. It was a chilly-sunny day, and I’d been feeling beaten down and tired from life’s knocks. Sighing, I shuffled to the waiting room, quickly scoring vending machine Cheetos and a coffee (nasty combo, but whatever). I made myself comfy, taking the last seat, thumbing through a … damn, nothing better than a Good Housekeeping. Look younger! Lose weight! Make fattening cheesecake! There were four other women in the waiting room. Across from me sat a Drew Barrymore look-a-like. We’ll call her DB. Next to me, a heavyset woman with a droopy leather jacket and a bowl cut (BC). Next to her, a wiry woman with beach combing pants and white Keds (WK), and another motherly type, a quiet listener (QL). DB started talking. And talking. The rest of us listened. At times, BC and WK tried to interject something, but DB was on a roll. The strange part was that normally the cars at a shop got done one at a time. People appear and disappear over time, right? Not so that day. All five of us were stuck there together for at least three hours. Strange indeed. During that time, we learned DB’s entire story. She shared where she’d been, where she lived and worked, and then it got deeper. Her husband had recently dumped her. She was in therapy. Mildly put, lately she’d been through it. She thanked me for saying she looked like Drew Barrymore. Then some random intruder poked her head into the waiting room and yelled, “No! She looks like Susan Sarandon!” I stood corrected. WK piped in that her husband had recently left her and that she was retired but was now looking for a job. Then everyone started networking, sharing job information, suggesting temp agencies, kicking in ideas, putting it on the table. BC said, “We’re all struggling. All of us.” Everyone in the room muttered, “Mmm hmm.” Everyone nodded in unison. QL finally spoke, saying that she just got her

by c.a. macconnell

car at a discount place. “It’s been running pretty good.” Then she rolled her eyes at the irony, considering where she was sitting. DB rattled on about her ex and how she was screwed. WK sifted through coupons. I wondered how I was going to pay to fix my car. We were all feeling it. Divorces, losing jobs, health costs and that one little thing — a car problem — had thrown us all off into the red. These women all had problems, but they focused on DB, who seemed the worst off. Complete strangers, they listened, relating, leaning in close, visibly concerned. I forgot about my car, and I had the thought, “We’re all struggling, but we’re all in this together.” Finally, DB’s car was done. She cheered. We all cheered for her. She thanked everyone, talking all the way to the checkout counter. Nonstop. Maybe, more than anything, she just needed an ear. BC and QL were next. Leaving, they waved and cheered. Only WK and I were left. It was strangely quiet without DB’s voice filling the waiting room. I said to WK, “I hope she’s all right, that Drew Barrymore girl.” WK nodded, crossing and uncrossing her Keds, moving her long, thin legs, shifting in the hard chair. “Made me wonder about the hard stuff, why it happens to some the way it does,” I said. WK looked me in the eye. “You just never know what people are going through. We’ve all got a story.” I laughed. “For sure. You should be a writer. Still, it makes me wonder why some get it worse at times.” “Don’t know,” WK said. “I guess if I knew the answer to that, I wouldn’t be sitting here in a tire place,” I said, chuckling. WK chuckled, too, and weirdly both of our cars were ready at the same time. When I checked out, the white-haired man with the handlebar mustache told me he’d been in the tire business for 35 years. He said he was there before they built the place, and it was wearing him out. Then he smiled and looked at me with shockingly blue eyes and said, “Come back and spend next Saturday with us.” I might. Like WK said, everyone has a story. Three hundred dollars and a new credit card later, I left Twilight Zone Tire and was on the road. Sure, I was upset about the money, but I thought about the way it happened — how I waited until Saturday, how I stumbled inside a random shop, how I met four caring women and how they gave me a story beyond what I ever thought would happen that day, the story of this: We’re all in this together. CONTACT C.A. MACCONNELL: letters@citybeat.com

4direct from race street!

Worst Week Ever! 4

by danny cross

No, thanks

WEDNESDAY OCT. 28 There are times when a public figure (Charlie Winburn) has to take a stand against a morally devoid organization (CityBeat) in a public place (City Hall) despite the repercussions (getting his bitch ass sued). But there are other times when this type of person does some weird private stuff and gets sued for an amount of money so big that you have to wonder what kind of weirdness is going on. George Jerome Barber, a former music director at Winburn’s Encampment Church/Resurrection Palace, on Tuesday sued the wily minister for $5 billion, accusing Winburn of firing him for rebuffing his sexual advances and doing it via text message (isn’t that just sooo dramatic?). Winburn responded by calling the suit a political stunt and said he is so straight he doesn’t even have sex with his wife from behind.

THURSDAY OCT. 29 Do you enjoy going to the bathroom in public? Are you the type of person who can pee no matter how many people are standing behind you, hoping you’ll hurry up so they can go? You just might be the perfect person to stand in a Times Square bathroom this holiday season to document how sweet Procter & Gamble’s Charmin-branded bathrooms are. P&G will hold open auditions Nov. 5 in search of five “outgoing and enthusiastic people” who enjoy bathrooms, blogging, photography and who aren’t afraid of making eye contact with a New Yorker in mid-stream. The winners will be announced at the Charmin Restrooms Nov. 23, and more information can be found at www.dreamjobforfreaks.com.

FRIDAY OCT. 30 We at WWE! wouldn’t know what it’s like to be a sexually active middle-aged married person (we occasionally have sex but it usually involves a stranger and an extremely expensive body rub). But we’re glad to know that if we ever end up in a relationship that needs a little extra spark that our friends over in Clermont County are prepared to fulfill our needs. The Enquirer today described The Cobra Club, a private “social club” that allows people to bring their own beer, dance to music with porn playing on TVs and have sex with each other if they want to. The club has caused some backlash from village administrators (New Richmond Mayor Ramona Carr said people should only have sex at home, and not until the kids are asleep), though the police say they’ve had no trouble except for a couple of weirdos in Tom & Jerry costumes trying to get food from a Sonic restaurant after it was closed.

If it wasn’t obvious that Barack Obama is an elitist when he said that stuff about people in Pennsylvania (all they wanted was to keep their guns and have a pretty lady as Vice President), today’s report that the Obama kids got the swine flu vaccine has proven it. The AP today reported that complaints

SUNDAY NOV. 1 There are a lot of illegal activities that the government doesn’t really care about: Go ahead and tear the tag off your mattress or paint some art on a streetlight — nothing bad is gonna happen. The Enquirer reported today that many gun dealers feel the same way about selling guns. A July sting of seven U.S. gun shows found that out of the 30 times they told the gun show dude they couldn’t pass a background check, 19 times they were sold a piece anyway. Promoters of several gun shows have blamed liberal queers antigun organizations for trying to tread on them, though the NRA’s official statement included only the lyrics to a recent Coors Lite jingle.

MONDAY NOV. 2 Five years ago federal prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald interviewed Vice President Dick Cheney only to come out of the meeting and describe a “cloud over the vice president.” While most people assumed Fitzgerald was referring to a theoretical cloud of senility and madness, the AP today reported that it was more like a cloud of horse shit coming out of his mouth. Cheney, who is such a bad person that his parents changed his name to Dick because they hated him, said 72 times that he couldn’t recall details in the Valerie Plame controversy. Cheney reportedly pled “can’t recall” to matters big and small, which annoyed prosecutors because one of the questions involved finding their car keys so they could leave and not have to talk to him anymore.

TUESDAY NOV. 3 Sometimes things happen that surprise even the most prepared person: a pencil breaking; a light bulb burning out; your little brother kicking you in the balls from behind and then beating your ass. The American taxpayers today felt a similar sense of surprise when they learned that Ford Motor Co. earned $1 billion in the third quarter of this year. The sudden profitability of the seemingly inept automaker (the Ford Fusion? Seriously?) impressed industry analysts, who said such gains once seemed less likely than a Ford hybrid SUV or a woman sleeping with a dude who drives a Mustang and not getting herpes. do you drive a mustang and have more than a need for speed? we can help: dcross@citybeat.com

november 04-10, 2009

SATURDAY OCT. 31

about the Obama children getting the vaccine because they’re part of the high-risk group their dad is president have appeared on blogs and Web sites all over the internets. The backlash has alarmed the president, who said that if it would make the public respect him more he’s willing to deal with the women at the DMV when his license plates expire just like everybody else.

We’re offering our biggest discounted rates ever!

Print - Online - Eblasts New for this year, both our gift guides are going glossy! Your ads will never look better than in full color on magazine stock. The first gift guide will be included in our Holiday Issue on November 24 and the Last Minute Gift Guide will be in the December 09 issue.

4 letters to the editor

More Time for the Crime You make some interesting points about the death penalty (“Dead Man Talking,” issue of Oct. 10). I have always been a bit ambivalent on this issue. I don’t think it is about an eye for an eye. Read the local news. Go back many years, read all of the ugly stories about people who served their time in jail, were released and then committed the same crime. So more tax dollars for more jail space where we can keep these repeat offenders locked up and away from us law-abiding citizens for life? Or the death penalty? Remove them permanently? You speak of revenge and justice. Yes, there is a difference. My point being, I do not want to have to worry about walking out my front door and getting murdered by a criminal that did time for the crime and then was released. I really do not want to have to worry about my partner or my dog getting jumped anytime they go out the door. Justice implies that some offenders should never see the light of day again — at least not on our street or yours or anybody’s.

for USDA’s surplus meat and dairy commodities. Not surprisingly, USDA’s own surveys indicate that 90 percent of American children consume excessive amounts of fat, and only 15 percent eat the recommended servings of fruits and vegetables. Consequently, nearly half of American children are overweight, 25 percent have high cholesterol and blood pressure and 30,000 suffer from Type 2 diabetes, once limited to adults. Their early dietary flaws become lifelong addictions, contributing to the escalating public health crisis. But change is on the way. Hawaii, California, New York and Florida legislatures have asked their schools to offer daily vegan/ vegetarian options. According to the School Nutrition Association, 52 percent of U.S. school districts now do. President Obama is likely to call for similar measures when the Child Nutrition Act is reauthorized by Congress later this year. Parents and others who care about our children’s health should work with PTAs and school officials to demand healthful plantbased school meals, snacks and vending machine items. They can get additional information at schoolnutrition.org, schoolmeals. nal.usda.gov, healthyschoollunches.org and choiceusa.net.

— Zacharia Smart, Price Hill

— Ted Martindale, Walnut Hills

Dumping Ground No More

Call your CityBeat advertising rep about our holiday advertising options.

november 04-10, 2009

513-665-4700

Just in time for the observance of National School Lunch Week, the Baltimore City Public School system became the first in the United States to offer its 80,000 students a weekly break from meat and associated chronic diseases. It’s a welcome start on a long road to improving our children’s and our nation’s health. Traditionally, the National School Lunch Program has served as a dumping ground

4 say what?

Drop us a line

It’s never been easier to get into CityBeat. Do it now:

Mail: Fax: E-mail:

Cincinnati CityBeat 811 Race St., Fifth Floor Cincinnati, OH 45202 513–665–4369 editor@citybeat.com

Letters policy: Letters must include the writer’s name, address and daytime phone number. Writers may request their names be withheld from publication. Letters might be edited for length and clarity.

CITYBEATâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S BENGALS

FAN OF THE WEEK FAN OF THE WEEK POST GAME INTERVIEW WITH WINNER

TYRONE PETERSON

You were under a lot of pressure tonight. What advice would you give other athletes who want to keep cool in extreme sports such as Bengals Football Bolo Toss? All I was thinking about was my sons face and how I wanted to take him to the game. Is there anyone who you would like to thank who may have played a small role in your victory tonight? All the Bud Light girls and CityBeat. I would also like to thank Big Tyrone Williams. What is your favorite food to eat at a football game? Nachos. In four words or less, tell the people what it feels like to be a Bengals Fan? Happy. Excited. Lucky. As one quarterback to another, what would you, as a champion, tell Carson Palmer he should work on if he wants to wear a Super Bowl ring in February? Beg T.J. to come back. Did you dream about being a Bengals Football Bolo Toss champion as a child? Everyday. Do you own a Bengals Jersey? No but my son does. Tell me how a Bengals Football Bolo Toss winner prepares to attend a Bengals game? Getting plenty of rest. What is your favorite color? Black or orange? Black. How do plan on winding down after such a rough game like the one you just dominated? Drinking Bud Light Wheat. What team you think the Bengals will face in the Super Bowl this year? The Saints.

The Difference is Drinkability.

Do you plan on painting your face for the game? No.

WWW.BUDLIGHT.COM

november 04-10, 2009

What Wizard Of Oz character do you most relate to and why? Dorothy, because she was focused on going home.

november 04-10, 2009

NEWS

A PATH Out of Homelessness Social workers reach out to mentally ill on streets 4By Jacob Baynham There are about 8,400 homeless people in Hamilton County. More than 2,000 have a severe mental illness. A local nonprofit called PATH is trying to help them.

ntil two years ago Timothy Mills had lost any hope of living a normal, stable life. His despair started years back, when he turned 18 and had to leave St. Joseph’s Orphanage. With nowhere to live, he dropped out of 10th grade at Colerain Senior. He started “drinking and drugging,” a lifestyle that would collide with severe depression and leave him with no home but the Queen City’s streets for 20 years. He slept in abandoned houses, lined up for soup kitchen lunches and stood on street corners asking for odd jobs. Some mornings he woke up so scared he never got up at all. “I didn’t even know I was depressed until I talked to the doctors,” he says. Ironically, what finally saved him was his asthma. “I couldn’t walk from here around the block,” he says. “If it wasn’t for that, I’d probably still be out there.” Mills was being treated at the Center for Respite Care, a North Avondale medical center for the homeless, when he met Alfonse Muller, from a group called Projects for Assistance in Transition from Homelessness (PATH). Muller found him a room in a transitional housing program in Over-the-Rhine. “This place here, it’s a blessing,” Mills says of his new home, a dorm-style building on 12th Street, run by an organization called Tender Mercies. Mills is taking classes at a nearby learning center, working towards his GED. Things are looking up. He’s written down some of his goals in a green notebook. Following through with these goals is hard, and sometimes frightening, but they’re there whenever he needs them, staring him in the face in deliberate penmanship:

CONTINUES ON PAGE 144

PHOTO: JACOB BAYNHAM

John Abercrombie, right, and Scottie Smith live in a homeless camp under a Queensgate bridge. Abercrombie has lived on the streets for 15 years. “It’s peaceful,” he says. “Even when I had an apartment, I still went outside. I like it outside.”

4 winners and losers ELIZABETH TROMBLEY: We commend local resident Liz Trombley, a recent UC graduate, who is the only person from our region that’s attending the U.N. Climate Conference in Copenhagen, Denmark this December. She has a background in international affairs, particularly on issues related to the Arab Gulf and oil. Trombley is raising money to help pay for the trip and also trying to get people to sign the Climate Countdown petition, which urges President Obama to increase U.S. actions on climate change prior to the conference. For more information or to donate, visit www. liztocopenhagen.wordpress.com.

CHRISTOPHER SMITHERMAN: The controversial president of the NAACP’s Cincinnati chapter issued an odd press release last week in which he complained about the ballot wording for Issue 9, the anti-rail amendment he proposed. He thinks the wording is misleading, with “yes” meaning “no,” and vice-versa. “This is nothing short of madness and political corruption,” Smitherman wrote. Except… the wording is exactly the same as written by NAACP lawyer Chris Finney and submitted by Smitherman. In fact, Finney threatened City Council awhile back if it changed the wording. Now, who is trying to mislead voters?

LOCAL GOP: Many Republicans are touting 2009 as their comeback year for winning political offices, what with Tea Parties, Glenn Beck and all. The actions (or lack thereof) from the Hamilton County Republican Party, however, seem to contradict that assertion. Some GOP candidates for Cincinnati City Council, along with their campaign staffers, are complaining that the local party hasn’t contributed cash to their efforts as it’s done in past election cycles. Typically, most candidates get about $11,000 from the mother ship. This year, many have received far less than that, with some getting zilch. Party leaders remain tight-lipped about the issue.

november 04-10, 2009

DAVID PEPPER, TODD PORTUNE: The two Hamilton County commissioners, both Democrats, have long complained about how the Bengals’ lease for the county-owned stadium is wreaking havoc on taxpayers. With sales tax revenues less than expected, commissioners may have to soon dip into county accounts to pay for the debt, meaning services to residents might be cut. Why, then, did Pepper and Portune announce their support for Cincinnati City Councilman Jeff Berding on Saturday? Berding was campaign manager for the tax and sold the deal to voters. The pair should ask Berding — a Bengals executive who recently lost his party’s endorsement — to give the county some of his salary.

by kevin osborne

We’re offering our biggest discounted rates ever!

Print - Online - Eblasts

New for this year, both our gift guides are going glossy! Your ads will never look better than in full color on magazine stock. The first gift guide will be included in our Holiday Issue on November 24 and the Last Minute Gift Guide will be in the December 09 issue.

Call your CityBeat advertising rep about our holiday advertising options.

513-665-4700

RESTAURANTS ARE

november 04-10, 2009

TALKING

“Being a part of the Best of Cincinnati® Card program and advertising in CityBeat every week has really increased our sales. This summer has been one of the best summers we have had in awhile, especially in this economy, and I have to give credit to my advertising in CityBeat...the ads in CityBeat worked! We have new customers coming in from both the card and our ad in CityBeat. It’s a great program. I would highly recommend the Best of Cincinnati Card® and advertising in CityBeat to any restaurant looking to increase their sales.” ~ Shelly Dee Felice Nelson DEE FELICE CAFE • 529 MAIN ST • COVINGTON, KY • 859-261-2365 • DEEFELICECAFE.COM

FOR MORE INFORMATION REGARDING THE BEST OF CINCINNATI® CARD PROGRAM, PLEASE CALL 513-665-4700, EXT 101

www.bestofcincinnaticard.com

4A PATH Out of Homelessness: FROM PAGE 13

Improve eating habits Go back to school Get involved in a church Go to Narcotics Anonymous/Alcoholics Anonymous See family more often Volunteer Mills admits that living on the streets taught him a lot. But the biggest lesson he learned was that he doesn’t ever want to do it again. Mills’ story is a welcome victory for the social workers at PATH, a nationwide program to help the homeless who have mental illnesses such as schizophrenia, bipolar disorder and depression. Altogether, one in 17 Americans suffers from severe mental illness. Among the nation’s homeless population, that figure rises to one in three. In Cincinnati, PATH employs seven outreach workers and is administered by Greater Cincinnati Behavioral Health Services (GCBHS) and Tender Mercies. In 2008, the team made contact with 775 homeless people in the city, of which 305 had a mental illness. Among those, 206 were enrolled in relief services. “It’s a pretty good dent,” says Debbie DeMarcus, GCBHS community support services manager. The figures represent considerable persistence on the part of the PATH team. For someone sleeping in a park or beneath an overpass, being punctual and organized enough to get one’s life back on track isn’t easy. Add a mental illness and substance addiction, and it’s harder still. “We do whatever we can do to make sure they’re not homeless anymore,” DeMarcus says. But that doesn’t always happen at a pace of her choosing. “You just can’t force people to do what you want them to,” she says. “We hang in there with them. A lot of people who are mentally ill, their choices just don’t make sense.” That patience underlies an unofficial mantra of the PATH team: Meet people where they are, and if they’re not ready for help, keep visiting. At 6:55 a.m. one recent Friday, the sun is lighting up the top floors of the skyline. Tony Camma sits alone in the one-room PATH headquarters at 12th and Elm, poring over a weekly planner and waiting for Alfonse Muller. The pair will spend two hours driving around the city visiting Cincinnati’s homeless camps. They go early to catch those who might be leaving for first-shift temp jobs. Camma selects the camps they will visit — he counts about 10 in Cincinnati overall, though the number fluctuates — and reviews what they found the last time they went. He knows his job well; he’s been doing it five days a week for two and a half years. Before that, he was homeless himself, living in his car. When Muller arrives, they leave for a camp next to the Roebling Suspension

Bridge. The camp is quiet at this hour, though the bridge hums with rush-hour traffic. Camma counts the tents and estimates 11 inhabitants. Last week there were four. Muller and Camma walk among the camp’s flotsam — a sooty pot, a fishing pole, a can of Spam and a small toiletry bag bearing the name, “Jason Smith.” Muller pulls a business card from his pocket and tucks it into the cupholder of a vinyl chair, beside an embroidered sign that reads “Home Is Where the Heart Is.” He explains that these trips aim to make contact, build relationships and let the mentally ill know that help is available. “Basically it’s to let people know that someone cares about them,” he says. Muller and Camma stash more cards under cups and in jacket pockets before leaving. The next stop is to say “hi” to a couple of men curled up in blankets just a few feet beneath the roaring Interstate-71. The men thank Muller and Camma for dropping by. Then Muller points the car toward a camp of alcoholics in Clifton. They pass the Mary Magdalen house at 12th and Main, where the homeless can shower, shave and wash their clothes. At 8:15 a.m. the line is already out the door. At the Clifton camp, two men are sitting around a radio. They greet Camma and Muller warmly. Two years ago Muller persuaded one of them, Bill, to go through rehab. He was sober for six months before relapsing. Bill’s backslide doesn’t seem to faze Muller, who banters with him like a friend. The other man, Bo, asks Camma where he can get help. “I’m tired,” Bo says. “I’m too old for this stuff, sleeping under a bridge.” Camma answers his questions, gives him a card and urges him to stop by the PATH office. Driving back to Over-the-Rhine, Muller and Camma talk about former clients, pointing out houses they found for some. They both enjoy their relationships with the homeless people they encounter. With the relationships come the patience and empathy necessary to do their jobs. “Once you do this, you just start realizing how hard it is to live out here,” Muller says.” It’s tough to get out of a hole.” Back on 12th Street, Timothy Mills is experiencing that difficulty firsthand. His twoyear transitional housing term will end next year. By then he hopes to have found a job and another place to live. He’s hopeful that he can turn his life around, but he’s scared, too. He’s grown used to failure in his life, and sometimes it’s easier to just expect it. He’s been given a second chance, however, and he aims to make the most if it. “I’m startin’ to grab hold of myself now,” he says. “I ain’t got a lot, but I got a whole lot. I got a roof over my head and a future I’m preparing for.” Mills flips to a clean page in his green notebook and draws two diverging railroad tracks. “It’s so easy to get detoured in life,” he says. “But I’m gonna stay on the right track. I’ll put one foot in front of the other, and just hope I stop trippin’ over them.” ©

Will Be On the at Local Sports Bars All Over Town! Play the Bengals Bolo Toss Game & win tickets to the next Bengals home game! Plus, qualify for the grand prize package!

WIN TICKETS TO THE

BEARS GAME!

THU 11/5 7-9p

Silver Spring House 8322 E KEMPER RD

THU 11/12 5-7p

Tina’s

350 W 4TH ST • DOWNTOWN

GAME ON BENGALS FANS! WIN AN INCREDIBLE

HDTV PRIZE PACKAGE!

Including Installation and One Year of DirecTV HD Service!

sponsored by

1-513-761-7000

november 04-10, 2009

YOUR LOCAL AUTHORIZED PREMIERE COMMERCIAL AND RESIDENTIAL DIRECTV DEALER

photo: jon hughes

Faces of the Election

2 photo: sean hughes

photo: cameron knight

photo: sean hughes

november 04-10, 2009

photo: cameron knight

photo: jon hughes

Out & About on Tuesday, November 3 Eugene Rose waves at cars in Hyde

cinnati Public Library.

Church. “Journalists make great politi-

6. Mayor Mark Mallory votes at Findlay

2. Campaigners tidy up a street in Hyde Park.

Issue 7 support to raise funds for the Cin-

Park in front of the Know Presbyterian cians,” Rose says.

photo: sean hughes

Street Neighborhood House.

7. Voting way out west at Precinct 19-B in Sayler Park, housed in the nursery of Eden

3. Three precincts in Mount Auburn are set

Chapel United Methodist Church.

up at God’s Bible School and Missionary

8. Outside of Integrity Hall in Bond Hill,

Training Home.

Don Luckie questions Cincinnati School

4. Adrienne White (left) and Kimberly Mar-

Board member Eileen Cooper Reed on

shall work at the Corryville Public Library

school related topics.

polling center. Turnout is fairly low. “Even

9. Grace Bell votes at Precinct 24-L

last year we didn’t have any more than 100 people come through,” Marshall says.

5. Outside of Precinct 24-L in Hartwell, Mary Rosselot of Wyoming looks for

in Hartwell with daughter Lily Bell.

10. A blizzard of yard signs at Knox Presbyterian Church in Hyde Park.

photo: cameron knight

photo: sean hughes

november 04-10, 2009

QUA LI Q

OUR RE CI

IS TY

LITY IS OU UA R

CIPE RE

elcome to CityBeat’s 2009 Best of I-275 Issue! We’re excited to finally offer a guide to the city’s often-overlooked suburban neighborhoods via the highway that enables them to feel connected to Cincinnati even though their residents can’t vote here. For too long it’s felt like we share a postal address and nothing more… We hope that the Best of I-275 Issue will encourage people from all parts of town to step outside their three-bedroom homes, put aside our differences and traverse the 84 miles of highway that connect us. It’s all here in one easy-to-follow guide to all things 275. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll call your grandmother and offer to take her to dinner at the Olive Garden nearest her house. We’re changing lives here.

And that’s what I-275 is all about: life. During our research we found plenty to celebrate in the neighborhoods that exist largely due to our fair highway loop — from the rural feel of Indiana to the hellish traffic hustle and bustle of the northern suburbs to the East Siders who are oh-so-close to living in the rich part of town (Clermont County is nice too!). We enjoyed unmistakable cultural attractions (gambling), amazing shops (hunting superstores), fine dining (chicken wings) and lush wilderness (Kentucky), not to mention a whole lotta Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers. And you know what? We’re glad we did. The suburbs don’t get the love they deserve in CityBeat’s annual Best of Cincinnati issue, which just makes us look like the elitists John McCain said we are. So grab your car keys, drive to the nearest I-275 interchange, make yourself comfortable in the nearest business listed on the highway sign and dive into the Best of I-275 Issue. We supersized it for free so you could buy yourself something nice. That’s just the way we are.

november 04-10, 2009

— Danny Cross, Project Editor/I-275 Enthusiast

Good Intentions, Bad Choices James Howard Kunstler on where highway loops went wrong 4by adam sievering

Grand Plan, which was further developed by retired General Lucius D. Clay, an engineer and a longtime advisor to the president. “What (The Clay Committee) missed, of course, by definition, were the unintended consequences, the blowback, of the project,” Kunstler says. What were these consequences? Well, as you sit in a coffee shop or local pub skimming this article while waiting for a friend who’s stuck in traffic, let’s start with the congestion issue. Kunstler reports that congestion was poorly understood at the time, especially by traffic engineers. These engineers didn’t seriously consider the possibility that building these expensive interstate routes intended to disperse traffic would actually draw more motorists — as well as profit-seeking opportunists — resulting in an even worse mess of road traffic. As Kunstler puts it, engineers didn’t understand that “if you build it, they will come … and come, and come, and come.” Cruise past TriCounty Mall at rush hour (at a maximum speed of three miles per hour, unless you’re in the express lane) if you aren’t convinced the plan failed in this category. Another significant consequence of The Grand Plan was an onslaught of suburban sprawl, which continues to swallow up Cincinnati’s uncommercialized land. Take a look at West Chester, for example. As Cincinnati and Dayton continue to converge due to suburban development, the West Chester Development Council boasts its community as “the economic center of the Cincinnati-Dayton Metroplex,” calling it a “super-region” that ranks 15th in the nation with a population of nearly 3 million. “We must realize that American cities were, on-the-whole, not artfully constructed nor beloved,” Kunstler says. “After the Great Depression and war, they had been neglected and became even drearier. The collective image of ‘city life’ in 1952 was represented by Ralph Kramden’s apartment on The Honeymooners TV show. Given the means, it was understandable then that Americans wished to escape it — especially after the ‘total victory’ of the Second World War. Suburbia, in a way, was the present we gave ourselves for winning.” While those of us who grew up in the suburbs can’t disown the “sheltered” environment — especially if it was a gift from the hands of

Modern society or scary crop circle? James Howard Kunstler says there were grand flaws in Dwight D. Eisenhower’s Grand Plan.

a triumphant American citizenry — we are left to wonder how the distance between it and the true heart of the city affected our personal development. “The new suburban habitat proved to be extremely problematical,” Kunstler says. “You got a comprehensive impoverishment of childhood development, not only in the inability of kids to navigate their everyday world, but in the loss of those informal places where kids could play on their own. By the mid-1960s, children (boys especially) were retreating to the world of canned entertainment (and drugs) because their development was being so thwarted. These phenomena I describe are all now familiar pieces of the picture.” With the construction of our beloved highway loop, our viable cropland has been replaced by strip malls (good sources for picking up high school girls), parking lots (good spots to meet your weed dealer) and an endless number of fast food restaurants (the absolute best places to score some grub after burning one down). In this light, suburbs are nothing short of paradise, if you’re the guy whose worldview is derived strictly from MTV reality shows and prophetic Bob Marley albums. As for all the other suburbanites out there who just haven’t given peace a chance, the suburbs still have it all: Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers for 99 cents, coin-operated carwashes, Starbucks, dog parks, mega churches, dollar

stores and car dealerships. Left out of these manufactured societies, however, is culture, open-mindedness and a real sense of community (and in many cases, sidewalks). In essence, Cincinnatians owe a lot to I-275, the main vein surrounding the heart of the city. Unfortunately, this lifeline has come at a great cost that we might not realize yet, and we’re not just talking about tax dollars, although the Ohio Department of Transportation (ODOT) has invested nearly $160 million in current maintenance and widening projects, with more secured for the future. Our highway loop, along with the other “arteries of commerce,” as they were referred to in 1955, are becoming more clogged with traffic as more suburbs sprout like weeds within a spits distance of the interstate. It’s possible that someday these arteries will be so clogged that circulation will be cut off from the heart of downtown, leaving the central body of cities across the country to die. “We invested our post-war wealth in a living arrangement that seemed appealing but turned out to have no future,” Kunstler says. “Bottom line: Life is tragic and people collectively sometimes make bad choices.” James Howard Kunstler’s newest book, World Made By Hand, is a novel about America’s post-oil future. Go to www.booksense.com to find a local independent retailer.

november 04-10, 2009

nterstate-275 is a lifeline for many Cincinnatians who commute to work and school or whose neighborhoods are separated by the very freeways they use to get to other parts of town. The country’s only auxiliary freeway that crosses through three states, this orbital route is heavily speckled with Cincinnati’s landmark eyesores, including strip malls, gas stations, fast food restaurants and outdated housing developments that can be seen just beyond the thin strips of trees that remain standing alongside the highway. This scenery is sadly familiar to most Cincinnatians and serves as a fit representation of how I-275, despite its intentions, has been a ticket to fortune for many profiteers and a vacuum of sorts that threatens to suck the life out of our city’s urban center. Construction on I-275, officially known as The Donald H. Rolf Circle Freeway, began in 1958, three years after President Dwight D. Eisenhower championed the idea of the Interstate Highway Network. This idea was also referred to as “The Grand Plan,” and Ike considered it a revolutionary plan that would “change the face of America.” From a 21st century perspective, we can see how the plan has indeed altered many facets of our country, but an important question to ask ourselves is if this new face of America is prettier or uglier than it was before most of us had a freeway just beyond our backyard. The original intent of The Grand Plan was detailed by Eisenhower in 1955, when he declared that “a modern, efficient highway system is essential to meet the needs of our growing population, our expanding economy, and our national security.” He listed a few other perks as well that would appeal to those who were still haunted by the Great Depression and World War II, claiming that “the country urgently needs a modernized interstate highway system to relieve existing congestion, to provide for the expected growth of motor vehicle traffic, to strengthen the Nation’s defenses, to reduce the toll of human life exacted each year in highway accidents, and to promote economic development.” James Howard Kunstler, author of The Geography of Nowhere, admires Eisenhower’s concision in stating the aims of the project but says there were some grand flaws with The

Coming Full Circle Driving the I-275 loop shows the many sides of Cincinnati 4by jac kern

november 04-10, 2009

t was an obnoxiously bright Saturday afternoon I should have spent on the couch, nursing a fairly nasty hangover. Instead, I’d been convinced to spend my day in a minivan with three CityBeat staffers (Danny Cross, Jason Gargano and Maija Zummo), a cooler full of autumn ales, a sweater-clad Chinese Crested named Harry and 84 miles of suburban highway to navigate. I guess if you’ve lived in Cincinnati for 22 years, you should drive the I-275 loop in its entirety at least once. We drove down I-75 and hopped on the loop going east toward Ohio and quickly came across our first destination: River Downs racetrack in Anderson Township. Somehow, we all had stories involving our grandfathers frequenting this place, but none of us had bet on the ponies in recent memory. It’s too cold in Cincinnati for live races in the fall, and since racing is all about keeping horses comfortable (save the whipping), River Downs offers only simulcast racing during this time of year. The indoor betting area, filled with rows upon rows of personal televisions to watch various races, was hoppin’ that afternoon with a diverse, mostly geriatric crowd. If you’re a bright-eyed young woman in need of a confidence boost, just do a lap around the bar with a bewildered look upon your face. Within minutes, at least a half-dozen gentlemen will be fighting over who gets to teach you their betting technique or buy you a Bloody Mary. If you’re a tattooed young man who wears tight purple sweatshirts, you might get the side-eye from a few regulars and be told to move to a different television (They charge for seating at four-person tables, but not if you have said young women in your company). For first-time betters, the environment can be pretty intimidating. Some of these dudes come equipped with notepads and laptops and research jockey biographies before placing their bets. And it smells really strongly of nacho cheese. But once you select a race in the day’s betting catalogue, find it on your television and pick a horse with the sexiest name, you’re all set! I was surprised by the bet-taker’s patience as I stuttered through my bet on True Bliss at Lexington’s Keeneland Thoroughbred Racing & Sales. She didn’t win, but did place in second. This was all the success we needed to feel confident in our next bet — No. 8 in the next race,

My Baby Baby, was going to be our hot ticket. She had great odds and a name to match. Gearing up for the race, she appeared strong and stoic, but as soon as that gate opened, something went wrong. Within seconds, My Baby Baby had bucked off her jockey, flipping him through the air. She then proceeded to race her way, weaving in and out of the pack of her jockeyed pals. We had lost all our money, but My Baby Baby looked so free, we could only watch our tiny television in disbelief. Once the race was over, the probable thought of My Baby Baby being shipped off to the glue factory killed our gambling buzz. It was time to head back to the loop. The drive through Amelia and Milford made me realize why Midwesterners drink a lot of beer. Without any significant stops to make, I found myself finishing a second Woodchuck Cider rather quickly. Anything to make the countless Wal-Mart parking lots seem more attractive. Even Harry decided to take a short, hairless nap at this point in the trip. Upon reaching Sharonville, we were ready for some excitement. Just in time, we came across the 275 express lane, stretching about seven miles across the northern-most part of the loop. The cement-guarded mini-lane is perfect for people who don’t want to get stuck in traffic or are too busy to partake in the many cultural offerings of the Tri-County area. We were particularly disappointed to have missed out on Dave & Buster’s, Tri-County Mall and Target World. With Maija a tizzy from not being able to get out of the car or shoot at some humanshaped targets with a crossbow, we decided to stop at the next available exit. Thankfully, this happened to be Forest Park, home to Cincinnati Mills. We risked losing our dutiful driver Danny by entering what will always be Forest Fair Mall (to me), as he was once banned for life from the premises by a court of law. But because the name had changed (more than once) since then, we assumed the ban was lifted, and so we trekked toward the most grand business in all the Mills: Bass Pro Shops® Outdoor World® and Sportsman’s Warehouse® (More Outdoors For Your Money™). Once we checked our firearms at the turn-style entrance, we were welcomed into a world of all things Man. With everything from

taxidermied elks to 15-pound trail mix tubs to tricked out fishing accessories, I felt like I was going to sprout some chest hair with all the testosterone that surrounded me. But, somehow, I didn’t feel too excluded. I noticed the number of couples holding hands and chatting it up by the massive aquarium, and realized BPS®OW®SM® had to have something to offer women. Boy, was I right. I mean, who doesn’t love old-fashioned fudge? With a state fair-style fudge cart right in the store, any chick can get her chocolate fix. ‘Cause we all know how much women love chocolate! Also, females know how to appreciate detailed décor. Upon stepping into the ladies’ room, I was swept away to rustic living. A lovely little parlor area featured a mosaic fireplace, vintage suitcases and fine leather armchairs. As for products, there were plenty of items just for girls. My favorite product at BPS®OW®SM® was strong, feminine and fought for a cause: pink pepper spray. The proceeds from this item go toward breast cancer research (that can be assumed if an item has a pink ribbon on it, right?), so I think this would be a great stocking stuffer for anyone’s college-

aged daughter. Mase for a cure! All this talk about self-defense got us hungry, so we hit the trail to find some eats. Jason told us about some deadly hot sauce at a nearby chicken wing restaurant, and with this delicacy in mind we navigated west toward Colerain: the township to be known heretofore as the birthplace of babies. Seriously. There were so many babies. Quaker Steak and Lube, originally a Pennsylvania restaurant, specializes in crazy wing sauces, suspending racecars from ceilings and playing really great music. At 6 p.m., there was already a 15-minute wait for a table. That’s how you know a restaurant is good. During our wait, we remained entertained by floor televisions, an arcade claw game, Lou Bega and all those babies. Two beers later, our table was ready and the host carried over four plastic lawn chairs for us. While listening to our eloquent server Tommy’s description of their tortilla soup (it really is the whole enchilada!), I noticed how differently Maija and I were dressed from everyone else still waiting in the arcade for their table-notifying buzzers to vibrate. Being the style-conscious women we are, the thought of not fitting in because of our apparel was foreign to us. The host didn’t look twice at us while taking our reservation, even though we were the only people in the joint wearing tights or knee boots. No one had informed us that there was a stonewashed denim and white sneaker dress code. No one explained to us that because we’re well into our twenties, we should probably have a child or, at the very least, one on the way.

113,000

Miles of state, county and municipal roads in Ohio

4.5

Number of times Ohio’s roads could circle the globe

$139,947,583

Cost of current widening of I-275 from U.S. 42 to Winton Road

$18,297,965.93

Cost of current maintenance on I-275 between Indiana state line and I-74 our rig, but I felt a sense of happiness as we paid our $2 parking fee and headed home. And as the planes buzzed overhead and the green highway signs pointed both east and west, I thought to myself, “Forget Paris, I’m glad we’re getting back on I-275.” For more on the 2009 I-275 drive, including audio of My Baby Baby bucking off her jockey, check out this week’s CityBeat podcast at www.citybeat.com.

$2 billion-$3 billion Cost of new I-75 Ohio River bridge

Number of times taxpayers have voted on a highway or bridge project

$128 million/$185 million

Cost of first phase of downtown streetcar system/Cost of entire system

1 Number of times taxpayers have voted on streetcar construction

november 04-10, 2009

The anxiety from all the purple Ugg-wearing toddlers almost caused us to lose our appetites for the famed onion ring tower. Just as I was about to suggest we backtrack to the mall so I could buy some LEI jeans at Kohl’s, I realized that I was the only one concerned with appearances. We might have been weirdoes in Colerain, but these folks didn’t pass judgment. Even when Danny and Jason went to the bathroom together… After running poor Tommy back and forth so many times for a more noxious hot sauce, it was finally time to jump on the loop and finish our drive. Maybe it was the Atomic Sauce talking, but the sunset over the Indiana boarder was damn pretty (or maybe it was just the casino glow). Either way, we rode in silence, mesmerized by the beautiful autumn scenery. Harry shed a tiny, hairless tear for the beauty that still existed along the western-most section of our highway loop. Our final stop once we crossed into and out of Indiana was CVG, the Cincinnati airport not located in Cincinnati. The hustle and bustle of pretending to travel gave us a second wind, and we fast-walked across the lobby just like everyone else. After some rousing escalator rides and losing Maija and then paging her after she had already returned, we found ourselves checking out the evening’s departures: Lexington, Denver, even Paris. One would think that after a day of experiencing so much of what Cincinnati has to offer, these destinations would be appealing. That much is true. Still, after considering that our combined salaries would probably have only afforded a one-way ticket to any of these destinations — and checking twice that no airport bar was open outside the terminals — we walked solemnly back to the van. I’m not sure if it was a sudden resurgence of affection for the center city of our hometown, the fatigue of a five-hour automobile adventure or the increasing likelihood that Harry would soon relieve himself inside

Sounds of the Circle A fantasy mix tape to accompany your tour of of the suburbs 4by brian baker

november 04-10, 2009

f Henry Ford invented the car, Dwight D. Eisenhower invented the road trip. Perhaps a slightly exaggerated analogy, but each of these men contributed to the very-American idea of hopping into a car, hitting the open highway and cranking up the tunes (this also required the help of Motorola’s Galvin brothers, but that’s another story). Eisenhower’s highway system brought with it the rise of the outlying suburbs, which in turn produced the idea of the connector loop, a link for the outer city regions and a method to circumvent a city‘s downtown congestion. It was a good idea in theory, until the realization that most suburban residents were commuting downtown employees and gridlock gripped the bucolic ’burbs. All of the generic above combined with the almost endless construction cholesterol clogging local arteries have helped make the I-275 corridor an almost counterproductive route. But if you were to travel this ring around Cincinnati’s collar — and inevitably exit to a surface road to avoid some pile-up/widening project/overpass repair — you would bear witness to an interesting collection of humanity that has collected on the city’s fringe. Such a trip deserves a soundtrack — perhaps a soundtrack that doesn’t actually exist. In honor of these strange places and their uniquely odd inhabitants, we’ve put together a perfect accompaniment to a surreal motor stroll around our own little connector hell, and we’ve replaced the original artists with more loop-appropriate new ones. These could be the sounds emanating from one’s car speakers while following I-275 around in a massive circle.

Original Song: “I’m in Love with My Car” by Queen Replaced with version by Slayer No better driving song for the Metal quartet than this Queen anthem as a tribute to all the high rolling monster trucks and overcustomized ’70s throwbacks tooling around at various exits on the loop, burning gas like it was 47 cents a gallon and parked in front of trailer homes whose monthly rent is less than the car payment. Original Song: “I Want a New Drug” by Huey Lewis and the News

Replaced with version by Type O Negative Who better to take the spritely Huey Lewis hit and turn it into a dirge for the meth-fueled Oughties? This could go out to any number of hoods in the loop; nearly every community has rolling labs and empty apartments that can’t be rented because they’re uninhabitably toxic due to previous chemists. Original Song: “Road to Nowhere” by Talking Heads Replaced with version by Talking Heads OK, this one doesn’t need to be imagined, but it’s the perfect opening track to a circular journey, a hopeful message about a trip that might just be futile. Original Song: “Leavin’ on a Jet Plane” by John Denver/Peter Paul & Mary Replaced with version by Rubber Knife Gang/Cletus Romp One of I-275’s greatest dichotomies is Cincinnati’s international airport, located well beyond the city’s boundaries in Northern Kentucky. Even the CVG designation seems tenuous — it’s closer to Erlanger. For this one, we need to address the airport’s rural status as well as its urban purpose, not to mention the duality of air travel; for some, an airport trip is a joyous event, for others a monotonous, desultory ass pain. A collaboration between RKG’s upbeat Bluegrass goodness and their Psychobilly counterparts in Cletus Romp would perfectly define all extremes. Original Song: “Little Pink Houses” by John Mellencamp Replaced with version by Kid Rock One of the loop’s other anomalies is that it traverses three states, including John Mellencamp’s Hoosier homeland. I could hear the Kid spit this one out, and maybe toss in the chorus of Kenny Rogers’ “The Gambler” for a shout out to the casino crowd, who may not have to drive the loop to feed their betting jones very much longer. Original Song: “My City Was Gone” by The Pretenders Replaced with version by Lady Gaga Forest Park declines and Cincinnati Mills (new name, same problems) remains a set for a George Romero movie, but at least we can dance at Metropolis while Rome burns. Wouldn’t it be great to hear Chrissie Hynde’s

classic take on the fall of Akron done up in Gaga’s faux passionate ElectroPop style, backed by faux ghetto dancers in a faux mall-within-amall-within-a-mall stage set? Faux sure! Original Song: “Eat the Rich” by Motörhead Replaced with version by Motörhead No one could present this brutal slab of Rock aggression any better than the dirty bastards that wrote it. Sure, it’s more thinly veiled sex joke than invitation to cannibalize the upper class, but the gated ones in Loveland and Indian Hill don’t know that. Imagine pumping this out on drive-by car stereos, Guantanamo style. Original Song: “Wanksta” by 50 Cent Replaced with version by Toby Keith This is perfect retribution all around; the ubiquitous 50 Cent hit being forced into the mouthpiece of the execrable Toby Keith and satellite beamed into the iPod of every trashy wannabe from Colerain to Batavia. And Fiddy gets the royalties, all 20 bucks. It’s a win-winwin. Original Song: “Are We Not Men? We Are Devo!” by Devo Replaced with version by Marilyn Manson

Headed past the Creation Museum along the loop? Imagine giving them a taste of the Devo classic as reconstructed by the Dean of Creep. If they don’t buy evolution, they’re never going to swallow devolution. Especially if Manson’s holding the spoon. Original Song: “A Little Bit Country, A Little Bit Rock ’n Roll” by Donny and Marie Replaced with version by Trent Reznor and Taylor Swift One of the great contrasts of the suburbs is the city mouse/country mouse mingling of urban hillbillies who escaped the city’s stresses and the rural hillbillies who already lived in the area when the suburbs rose up to envelope them. And before you get your panties in a twist, ich bin ein hillbillier. My dad’s people are from Paducah and in my genetic make-up, it’s a footrace to see who breaks the ribbon first, the hill or the billy. Stand down, I’m one. The Hatfields and the McCoys proved it; some hillbillies aren’t meant to live together, and the further proof is scattered around the loop from Miamitown to Colerain and then back to Miamitown. Can’t we all just get along? Hell, no, y’all. ©

Best Giant Concert Venue: Riverbend Riverbend music center is big. (How big is it?) It’s so big it has another concert venue inside of it: the PNC Pavilion, like a baby in a music belly. Along with this building, Riverbend also contains a covered area where it’s expensive to sit, a lawn area for cheap people and fake hippies (who act like every concert where it rains is Woodstock and they get all muddy and walk around barefoot like assholes) and also an area where you can park your boat. On top of size, it’s reassuring that you can see Jimmy Buffett and Dave Matthews every summer until you die. (MZ)

Best Way To Get To Casinos: I-275 West Who really wants to drive on Route 50 with a bunch of pickup trucks and poor people? The western side of I-275 is one of the most undeveloped and scenic parts of the loop. Cruise past the airport with the windows down, the Creationism Museum with Slayer on the radio and into Lawrenceburg with your luckiest number in mind. Just don’t look anyone in the eyes who’s driving a Mustang. (DC)

Best Hooters: Springfield Pike photo courtesy creation museum

Best Proof of God: Creation Museum There’s no such thing as the Big Bang. Swedish scientists are proving that with their alwaysbroken particle collider. In reality, God created the world in six days, rested on the seventh and made dinosaurs and humans live on the planet at the same time. The Creation Museum will show you all about human history from the time when God created the cosmos to when Noah built the Arc to modern times, where a walk-through exhibit demonstrates how gays are to blame for all the evil in the world, including graffiti and heroin. There’s also a “scientific” portion of the museum that proves that all the animals that didn’t make it onto the Arc before the flood became fossils (carbon dating isn’t real) and a planetarium that takes you step-by-step through the creation of the universe. It’s expensive to get in but the animatronics in the Garden of Eden and the outfits home-schooled kids wear on field trips really make it worth the price. — Maija Zummo

The Hooters in Springdale might not be better than the other two in the Cincinnati area, but it’s the one with the easiest access from I-275. And you know what that means: It’s the best pit stop for travelers who have an itch for the Hooters Cobb Salad, which the menu reminds us, “Sorry, there’s no cobb on this salad.” Ha. Our spies — aka some dudes at The Lodge Bar — tell us that Playboy is on the verge of another Girls of Hooters search. Anyone else find it strange that the person who serves your chicken strips with tasty barbeque sauce might one day pop up on your computer sans her orange shorts and functionally obtuse T-shirt? (JG) CONTINUES ON PAGE 254

Best Best Buy: Colerain Avenue There are plenty of reasons to hop off the highway at Exit 33 — you can see the Olive Garden, Meijer, Wal-Mart and Quaker Steak & Lube from the road. But look a little harder (over on the other side of the pavement) and you’ll see the real attraction of Colerain Avenue: a brand spanking new Best Buy store. Sure, it looks exactly like any other Best Buy and the sales associates will try to sell you the same extended warranty you could get at the Eastgate store (or by lighting a hundred dollar bill on fire), but there’s something reassuring about a brand new parking lot that makes purchasing electronics on credit seem more reasonable. (DC)

Best Garbage Dump Mountain: Mount Rumpke creative commons - http://www.flickr.com/photos/yummiec00kies/

Best Horse Track: River Downs This bastion of animal-friendly excitement has been open for 85 years, long before I-275 made it so convenient to cruise on out for Saturday afternoon action or simulcasting fun. Choose your horse by name, color or wildness (you can watch the assistant dudes get them ready in the stable and figure out which one fights the most) and then cheer your jockey on as he beats your philly with a whip. With Keno in full-effect and the regulars nearly as old as the racetrack itself, there’s no way any downtown casino could take business away from this East Side gem. — Danny Cross

november 04-10, 2009

Those of us who grew up near Mount Rumpke remember this topographical anomaly before the glory days — back when it was a mid-sized repository buzzing with garbage trucks and methane gas. At 1,045 feet above sea level today, it is the highest point in Hamilton County and also one of the largest landfills in the U.S. Save for a massive 1996 landslide that exposed 15 acres of buried waste (that smelled pretty bad but Rumpke made up for it by paying a $1 million fine), things have been pretty great for those of us whose families have since moved out of Colerain Township. This treasure will be even more appreciated if it becomes a ski resort when it reaches capacity in 2022. (DC)

Taste of 275 CityBeat interns review every Wendy’s restaurant on the loop 4Edited by danny cross and maija zummo

here might be hundreds of dining options along I-275, but there’s only one Super Value Menu® — and it’s at Wendy’s. In honor of this pioneering fast food chain, whose Old Fashioned Combos®, Garden Sensations® Salads and Frosty™ have revolutionized highwayside dining, we sent our most poor and hungry talented and promising young writers out to review all 15 Wendy’s locations off I-275. Each stop included the purchasing of at least one item from the Super Value Menu®, an assessment of the service and in most cases a peek inside the restroom, resulting in an overall ranking from 1 to 5 Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers. Thank you, and come again.

november 04-10, 2009

I-275 Exit: Hebron/KY237/North Bend Road Wendy’s Address: 2098 North Bend Road Most people complain about fast food never really looking as it does in commercials, but my Double Stack looked just like the one in the photo menu, in all its square glory. I appreciated the eye contact my cashier gave me and the demanding handwashing sign posted in the women’s restroom. I did not appreciate that whoever last used the ladies’ room hovered a bit too high. (Jac Kern) Grade:

I-275 Exit: US-25/US-42/US-127/Dixie Hwy Wendy’s Address: 3065 Dixie Hwy. I went in to order a Frosty, expecting the cashier to try and sell me the newest Baconator offspring. I ended up sharing a special moment with a gem named Lillian. Instead of letting me pay $1.69 for a small Frosty, she suggested I purchase a $1 gift book that came with 10 Frosty coupons. And with 90 percent of the proceeds going to the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption, I could feel good about myself while slurping down a chocolate shake. Lillian proceeded to explain that she is trying to sell the most books because she was adopted as a child and the foundation is very special to her. ARE YOU READING THIS, OPRAH? (JK) Grade: (5 Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers go to Lillian for warming my cold, black heart.) I-275 Exit: Covington/Independence Wendy’s Address: 493 Orphanage Road

This location was aggressively promoting their new Frosty-cino and Coffee Toffee beverages. A good 15 guests were dining inside this location, enjoying the musical stylings of Vanessa Carlton. Conveniently, the WiFi offered at the adjacent Bob Evans restaurant could be picked up inside this Wendy’s. If you pretended the scent of over-salted French fries was coffee, you could easily forget you’re at a fast food chain and think you’re in a Starbucks. (JK) Grade: I-275 Exit: OH-125/Beechmont Ave. Wendy’s Address: 601 Ohio Pike From the outside, this appeared to be your average location with dingy brown bubble windows. Inside, however, Wendy got some work done! We’re talking Ikea light fixtures, frosted glass booth dividers, post-modernist depictions of fast food and bright berber carpet. What could spoil such a lovely setting? Overhearing the following dialogue from the kitchen: “Ew! What is that?” “It’s poison.” (JK) Grade: I-275 Exit: Milford Pkwy. Wendy’s Address: 75 Rivers Edge This whole area is a high school hangout: Quaker Steak & Lube, an airport cinema, Red Robin, Ruby Tuesday’s and BW-3’s. Just before the evening shift a clique of high school employees form a circle around a free overstuffed small fry and some sour cream on the side while Brandon, a fat-faced manager weeps quietly knowing he’ll never be cool enough because he’s the boss. But he’s working hard. This Wendy’s should be Zagat’s No. 1 for top food, top facilities and top overall 2009. (Peter Robertson) Grade: I-275 Exit: OH-28 Blanchester/Milford Wendy’s Address: 1097 OH 28 “Don’t Trust Govt Run Anything!” said the sign of an old white guy holding an American flag off Exit 57. I thought about what he said as I drove past every fast food temptation known to middle America. What I don’t trust is a Wendy’s trying to look clean with its new earthy colors and post-modern art of burgers

illustration: rebecca sylvester

and fries while the restroom looks just like the Shell station on East Liberty Street. (PR) Grade: I-275 Exit: Loveland/Indian Hill Wendy’s Address: 10601 Loveland Madeira Road Sitting with my five nuggets and a value drink I see fake ferns and ivy planters, two bigger women having a quiet conversation and a little girl getting an insulin shot from her father. As weird and ironic as that is, this Wendy’s was one of the good ones. Still, after seeing that little girl, I rethought getting a refill. (PR) Grade: I-275 Exit: US 22/OH-3 Montgomery/Morrow Wendy’s Address: 10765 Montgomery Road Surrounded by glass I could see all of Wendy’s competition: Quiznos, Skyline, McDonald’s and Baskin Robins. But the real winner in the end is Dr. Mandell and Dr. Brown’s plastic surgery center coincidentally in the middle of it all. This is the first location where I couldn’t see what was going on in the back, though I did realized that window orders were being shouted in Spanish. (PR) Grade:

I-275 Exit: Lebanon Road Wendy’s Address: 11960 Lebanon Road While the young man, Matt, who took my order lacked any degree of enthusiasm, he made up for it with accuracy. My $3 value menu meal came up within a frighteningly quick 30 seconds, and just how I wanted it. The décor was mismatched and confused, and the condiment station was riddled with coagulated ketchup. The bathroom, however, smelled like a pungent cocktail of cleaning products, which is always comforting. (Eric Johnson) Grade: I-275 Exit: OH-747/Princeton Pike Springdale/ Glendale Wendy’s Address: 11681 Princeton Pike My aspirations for dollar menu delights dwindled as the mile and a half jaunt from the highway seemed like an eternity. When I finally reached this Ikea-clad, swank Wendy’s, I was confronted with a raucous French DJ counting down a top-ten playlist on the radio in, you guessed it, French. While my Double Stack had me wondering, “Where’s the beef?” and the seats in the dining room had no cushions, the bathroom did have its own private stall. (EJ) Grade:

Best Baby-Making Neighborhood: Colerain Township

4STAFF PICKS: FROM PAGE 23

275 Exit: Winton Road/Forest Park Wendy’s Address: 11898 Chase Plaza This was the longest line I waited in all day. It could have been on account of the woman who sent her chicken sandwich back not once, but twice; the first time for being too cold and the second for having too moist of a bun. Needless to say, I felt for the gal working the cash register. But by the time I reached the counter to order my 5-piece chicken nugget, she managed to muster up a smile. Yet, I knew that wouldn’t be the case when she had to mop the suspiciously wet bathroom floor, which was strewn with sopping wet toilet paper, later on that evening. (EJ) Grade: I-275 Exit: OH-127 Hamilton Ave. Fairfield/Mt. Healthy Wendy’s Address: 11400 Dallas Blvd. United We Stand! This is the beam of light Wendy’s wants you to believe serves the perfect square patties on the perfectly toasted buns. 11:30 a.m. is prime time for fast food lunch and my very made-up, very unenthusiastic yet very polite, great-weaved cashier (Diva) made my day. Although the over abundance of condiments quickly cooled my Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger, it was pure Mid-Western delight! Mmmm — and the Freedom fries were nothing short of great, fresh, hot, crispy (and slightly limp) saltiness. A true American pastime, indeed! (Jim Cunningham) Grade: I-275 Exit: OH-27/Colerain Ave. Wendy’s Address: 10152 Colerain Ave. Divided We Fall! Petsmart and Wal-Mart are the great American neighbors of this sad, nearly defunct, operation. No flags or sticker support here, my friends! My no name-tagged cashier was pleasant enough but may have been one of those people pleasing drones I heard about on Coast to Coast— they can be very tricky. I ordered my usual (Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger and Value Fries) and got whatever the drone handed me: patty, no mayo, one pickle, no tomato, no lettuce, extra cheese. And the fries were too done and not salted. This may be the hub of what’s wrong in Burgerville. I wonder if they speak American at Burger King? (JC) Grade:

Best Way To Go Green: Express Lane We all know that sitting in traffic is really bad for the earth, that’s why it’s important for anyone driving east on I-275 to decide before the Route 4 exit whether or not they need to go to Hooters, Tri-County Mall or Micro Center. If not, hop on the express lane, skip the whole 747/ Tri-County mess and keep on truckin’ toward Mason. The lane is a little narrow, but it’s bordered on both sides by cement barriers so if anything bad happens your car will continue its forward momentum whether you’re skidding, flipping or just rolling slowly, and the other commuters will be safe. (DC)

Best European Design: Colerain Avenue Roundabout photo courtesy wikipedia

Best Airport: CVG The Cincinnati/Northern Kentucky International Airport — aka CVG — started as a single terminal in 1947 and now offers non-stop flights to 120 cities, including such fancy foreign places as Amsterdam, Frankfurt, Paris and Rome. The current economic downturn has finally forced CVG’s carriers to alter their wallet-crippling ticket prices (we once had to eat Ramen noodles for a month after a trip to London) but the place is still relatively easy to navigate (ever been to LAX?) despite Delta’s effort to build its own sprawling mini-city within the airport. Oh, and in what was surly a fierce competition, Airports Council International has named CVG’s Web site one of the top 10 in the world. — Jason Gargano

Best Dance Club: Metropolis

What better place to get your ass kicked by a teenager than at a dance club that’s inside a mall? We’re not sure what it’s even called these days, but it was Metropolis back when we frequented the Forest Park area and were banned from Forest Fair Mall 4 Life. This black-lit, thumpin, two-floor dance hall is where the hardest residents of Fairfield, Forest Park and Springdale come to shake their junk/butts. You won’t find Nick Lachey stopping by any time soon, but you can get in a fight in the parking lot any night of the week. (DC)

Best Shooting Range: Target World Target World has a lot of guns and classes on guns and gun-related accessories. They have concealed carry classes (hell yeah, Second Amendment) and gun-training sessions covering everything from handguns all the way up to machine guns. So if you’re over 18 and you want to shoot a gun, come here, sign a waiver with some rules on it, and pick up a firearm. Despite the fact that the crossbow range is in the middle of the store, and two women may or may not have committed suicide in their firing range in the past six months, things seem relatively safe (they make you wear ear and eye protection). Don’t tread on me. (MZ)

The roundabout at the Colerain Avenue business complex (also described as “that slab of parking lots and architecturally banal buildings housing stuff made in other states”) takes us back to the time we got stuck on one of those similarly confusing things in Paris for about 20 minutes (everyone was moving counterclockwise). The roundabout is supposed be safer for drivers and pedestrians, a premise challenged by the guy who drove straight into the circle thing in the middle (the one in Colerain, not Paris), lodging his muffler on a piece of concrete. Anyway, for fans of the concept, there’s another one on Northern Kentucky University’s campus, which is pretty close to I-275. (JG)

Best Italian Food: Olive Garden When you’re here, you’re family. You’re also party to a plentiful harvest the likes of which are rarely seen in American chain restaurants (except during Red Lobster’s Shrimp Fest). Once you’ve entered the doors of an Olive Garden, may your soup, your salad, your breadsticks and sometimes your pasta bowl never end. In this wonderful world, the eggplant parmesan is mostly breading, the lettuce is iceburg and your server will actually ask if you want more shredded cheese on your Five Cheese Ziti. You shall leave happy, never hungry, after stuffing your emotional void with carbohydrates. (MZ)

Best Aquarium: Bass Pro Shops® Outdoor World® and Sportsman’s Warehouse® Bass Pro Shops is awesome and it has everything you would ever need, from hunting weapons and ATVs to kayaks and pepper spray. You could live in this store. There’s a cool bathroom and all sorts of food, including homemade fudge. There are also fishing rods and a giant aquarium set up in the middle of the store, so if you got stuck in there like that one Saved by the Bell episode, you could catch, cook and season some fresh fish for dinner. Flanked by fake rocks, taxidermied animals and mannequins in hunting gear, this aquarium is very tall and there’s a waterfall going into it. And it’s full of ugly fish. I saw a fish with a long nose and one that I thought was a catfish. It looks cool and pseudo-natural surrounded by all the dead animals and living plants. Most stores don’t have aquariums. (MZ)

november 04-10, 2009

I-275 Exit: OH-128 Hamilton/Cleves Wendy’s Address: 6330 OH-128 When enjoying fine cuisine I usually prefer to dine next to a graveyard. The tables out front offer a great view of the tombstones. That said, the parking is a-plenty and the bathrooms are clean. The 5-piece nuggets are as dry as any other Wendy’s and the employees are happy to serve you your frosty with a forced smile. (Rachel Rayburn) Grade:

We haven’t conducted any scientific polls or official experiments, but we’re pretty sure Colerain has the highest per-capita baby-making ability of any neighborhood within eyeshot of I-275. Reasons for this conclusion abound, none more than the fact that we never fail to see at least 102 minivans every time we venture onto Colerain Avenue, a wire-andconcrete-laden stretch of road that is sure to find any fertile male or female yearning for the elemental pleasures of the flesh. (JG)

TO DO

Cast of Rhinoceros

CBRECOMMENDS

enjoy a Sunday brunch with Jazz band The Wannabees. Be sure to vote for your favorite arrangement for the People’s Choice Award, which will be selected Sunday. This event is open 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Nov. 5-8 at the Cincinnati Art Museum. For more information on pricing for workshops and special events, visit www.cincinnatiartmuseum.org. — JAC KERN

PHOTO: Mikki Schaffner

WEDNESDAY04 4 ONSTAGE: THREE SISTERS, presented by the Playhouse in the Park, is a new, very colloquial version of Anton Chekhov’s play by the much-admired writer Sarah Ruhl. See review on page 44. ONSTAGE: RHINOCEROS Eugene Ionesco wrote ironic absurdist plays that draw attention to themselves. In his 1959 work, Rhinoceros, currently being staged at Northern Kentucky University, one character asks of another, “Do you know anything about the avant-garde theater there’s so much talk about? Have you seen Ionesco’s plays.” The response: “Unfortunately, not. I’ve only heard people talk about them.” The questioner points out, “There’s one happening now. Take advantage of it.” That’s the kind of circular, thought-provoking logic you’ll find in the script by the French playwright. It’s the story of a small town where the local citizenry are turning into rhinoceroses. All but the central character are affected. But Bérenger, a man who’s often drunk and tardy, doesn’t much care. NKU drama professor Daryl Harris is staging the show with particular attention to the “Theatre of the Absurd” and special emphasis on the comic side of the action, rooted in both physical action and linguistic antics. Harris’s staging of Rhinoceros also features music specifically created and recorded for the production. $8-$12. Through Nov. 8. 859-572-5464. — RICK PENDER

november 04-10, 2009

THURSDAY05 4

COMEDY: BILL SQUIRE You can be forgiven if, for a moment, you wondered if ’80s-era rocker Billy Squier and comedian Bill Squire were actually one and the same. “A few months ago Billy Squier was playing a show with Styx or some other equally terrific ’70s/’80s era glam rockers,” says the Cleveland-based funnyman. “Some of my parents’ friends thought that I was opening for (the headliners). I haven’t had anyone show up to a gig thinking they were

going to see Billy Squier doing stand-up, and if anyone ever has they haven’t said anything.” At the age of 19, Squire embraced his Mormon faith and went on a mission to the Philippines. He eventually soured on the strict rules, and after breaking several was excommunicated and sent home. “(My parents) were super bummed,” he says. “It meant a lot to them and that’s like a big dishonor. Luckily I was only sent home a week early so it wasn’t quite as embarrassing to them. But, yeah, they probably still aren’t over it completely.” He still draws on that experience for his act, having recently developed a bit about Filipino funerals. “It is a difficult chunk of material,” he notes, “because it is very dark, but hilarious.” Bill Squire performs at Art in Bloom Go Bananas ThursdaySunday. $8-$12. www. gobananascomedy. com. — P.F. WILSON EVENTS: ART IN BLOOM You don’t have to crawl into a cave to hibernate and wait for the next five months until you can see some flowers, because just as the weather is getting cooler the Cincinnati Art Museum is featuring around 100 different fine art floral arrangements. Come see how live foliage has taken over permanent works and installations at the museum. This year, guests can get involved with workshops courtesy of the Krohn Conservatory. Watch special floral arrangement demonstrations with techniques from across the globe and

LITERARY: MARTY BRENNAMAN The Mercantile Library continues its By the Book speaker series with … Marty Brennaman? Yes, the longtime Cincinnati Reds play-byplay man will talk about the books that have influenced a broadcasting career that’s approaching 50 years, the last 36 with the Reds. “I’ve been a voracious reader my entire life, which has obviously helped me in my profession of choice,” Brennaman says by phone, his familiar voice as clear and concise as it is on the radio. “You need to have a vocabulary commensurate with what you hope to attain from life, otherwise it puts you behind the eight ball.” Yes, he said “commensurate.” Brennaman’s love of books started at an early age. “I read every Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew book that came out when I was a kid,” he says. “I still have some of them.” He later moved on to novels and every other form of written word, including the baseball beat writers that populated the pages of the The Sporting News in the 1950s. Naturally, the conversation turns to baseball and the one question on the mind of every Cincinnati fan: Can the Reds, who haven’t had a winning season in nearly a decade, compete as a smallmarket team? “Commissioner (Bud) Selig is either a fool or trying to pull the wool over our eyes if he thinks, as he said the other day, that we have a good business model,” Brennaman says. While the broadcaster admits it’s not impossible for a team like the Reds to compete, he says the margin for error is so much less than it is for a highpayroll team like the New York Yankees. He closes the subject with a signature no-nonsense take on Selig’s head-in-thesand approach to baseball’s growing competitive imbalance: “It’s the biggest bunch of crap.” Brennaman speaks 11:30 a.m. Thursday at The Phoenix (812 Race St., PHOTO courtesy game day Pr Downtown). $15 for Mercantile members; $18 for everyone else. To RSVP, call 513-621-0717. — JASON GARGANO

FRIDAY06 4 ART: PHILIP M. MEYERS, JR. MEMORIAL GALLERY exhibits Form from Form, an eight-artist show that is part of the University of Cincinnati’s larger celebration of the 150th anniversary of Charles Darwin’s On the Origin of Species. See Art on page 43. COMEDY: KEVIN NEALON, former SNL funnyman, performs at Funny Bone on the Levee on Friday and Saturday. See Arts on page 46.

Adam Burke and tigers PHOTO courtesy hannefordcircus.com

EVENTS: ROYAL HANNEFORD CIRCUS Looking for a fun and affordable oldfashioned outing for the whole family? The Bank of Kentucky Center can help when the Royal Hanneford Circus rolls into town, bringing along its talented performers, animals and over 100 years of experience. Bring your family and witness entertainers flip high in the air or see tigers, bears, horses and other animals perform various stunts in three big top tents. 7:30 p.m. Friday; 11 a.m., 3 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. Saturday; 3 p.m. Sunday. $8-$38. www.hannefordcircus.com. — RACHEL RAYBURN

SATURDAY07 4

CONTINUES ON PAGE 304

november 04-10, 2009

EVENTS: CINCINNATI COMIC AND ANIME CONVENTION Saturday at the Radisson Hotel on Fifth Street in Covington there is a comic and anime convention where novelist and scriptwriter David Mack, illustrator Tony Moore, comic artist Mark Kidwell, graphic novel and Heroes writer RD Hall, great American comic book writer Gary Friedrich (voice of 1985 Pop-singing superhero, Jem), Samantha Newark and many more are probably diabolically planning on having a good time. At their tables from 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Saturday and 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Sunday, they’ll be signing autographs and looking to wax

november 04-10, 2009

Lead Awareness Week is October 18th-24th

MUSIC: HATEBREED, one of the most successful Hardcore bands in history, comes to Bogart’s with Cannibal Corpse, Unearth, Hate Eternal and Born of Osiris. See Sound Advice on page 41.

photo courtesy Aisle gallery

EVENTS: A CRACK IN THE PAVEMENT, Andrea Torrice’s documentary on the current struggles of the early suburbs, will be shown at 6 p.m. on WCET with watch parties at Sitwell’s Coffee House in Clifton and other locations. See Film on page 51.

SATURDAY07 4 ART: AISLE GALLERY Matt Morris, one of the city’s busier contemporary artists as well as a CityBeat contributing arts writer, opens his newest show, an installation called Pairs Well With, featuring works on facial tissue paired with small objects meant to reply to those tissues. There is a 7-10 p.m. opening reception Saturday at Aisle Gallery in the West End. Morris aims to display these tissues spaciously and poetically, as if they were quietly choreographed down the gallery’s namesake “aisle.” In the gallery’s more open spaces, including a new room, he will display sculptural pieces that use plastic objects, glitter, foamcore, cardboard, chenille stems and other objects to engage their locations within the gallery. The show stays up through Dec. 20 and Morris gives a gallery talk at 1 p.m. on Nov. 21. The gallery is open noon-4 p.m. Monday-Friday and by appointment on Saturday. 513-241-3403. — STEVEN ROSEN

4TO DO: FROM PAGE 27

wax intellectual about the practical usage of some of their favorite superpowers. Maybe what a load of crap the Watchmen live action film was or how sweet both Avatar movies could be in the next year? But that isn’t all. What Comic-Con would be complete without Star Wars toys and action figures marbling the décor of the conference hall? Chubby amateur heroes and Shadow Hare will find admission to be $5 each day and kids 12 and under get in free Sunday with a paid adult. Anyone who comes will get a free Kabuki comic and a chance to win a $300 door prize each day. Call 615573-4537 for more information. — PETER ROBERTSON

ART: IRIS BOOKCAFE Did you hate seeing Thin Air Studio’s terrific construction disappear from the Weston Gallery’s street level space last summer? It was that very site-specific piece that incorporated bare branches lashed together with manila rope, producing a tree-like canopy where none is expected. “Tidal,” a smaller example of Thin Air’s inspired use of Ohio River driftwood and other natural materials, is found on Main Street, permanently installed in Iris Book Cafe’s courtyard. Christopher Daniel and Kirk Mayhew, the sculptors who collaborate as Thin Air Studio, Cincinnati Comic and will speak about their work Anime Convention at Iris at 2 p.m. at the Main Street Second Sunday event. Iris Book Café (1331 Main St.) is open 8 a.m.-10 p.m. Monday-Friday; 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Saturday-Sunday. 513260-BOOK. — JANE DURRELL

MONDAY094 MUSIC: HOOTS & HELLMOUTH, the Roots Rock band, comes to the Southgate House with William Elliott Whitmore and Wake the Bear. See Sound Advice on page 41.

SUNDAY08 4

november 04-10, 2009

MUSIC: RAMMING SPEED, the Boston Thrash Metal band, plays the Blue Rock Tavern. See Sound Advice on page 41.

PHOTO courtesy cincinnati comic and anime convention

MORE TO DO CBRECOMMENDS

TAKE ITFROM US

photo: James Fraher

PHOTO COURTESY movieweb.com

Barrelhouse Chuck

SATURDAY07 4 MUSIC: ELEVENTH ANNUAL BLUES & BOOGIE PIANO SUMMIT If President Obama were to appoint a Boogie Woogie Czar — someone to travel the world promoting the rolling and rollicking Blues style popularized in the late ’30s by pioneers like Albert Ammons and Big Joe Turner — Cincinnati-based pianist Ricky Nye would definitely be on the short list for the appointment. Each year, Nye performs several dates in Europe and presents a unique Boogie Woogie piano showcase at the Southgate House, which always includes an international element, as well as some of the finest Boogie players in the U.S. Now in its 11th year, the Blues & Boogie Piano Summit returns to the Southgate this Saturday, featuring American specialists Lisa Otey (from Tuscon, Ariz.) and Barrelhouse Chuck (Chicago), plus Spain’s Lluis Coloma. Our hometown boy Nye, of course, also performs, while local musicians Brian Aylor (drums), Steve Perkakis (upright bass) and George Bedard (guitar) provide accompaniment throughout the night. If you’ve never attended a Summit, the show is one of those “unique to Greater Cincinnati” events that everyone should see at least once. Though, chances are, if you catch one Summit, the skilled play and fun atmosphere created by the performances will have you back next year and beyond. $20. 859-431-2201. — MIKE BREEN

10/29-11/1

11/12-11/15

Bert Kreischer

Adam Hunter Conan O’Brien, Comics Unleashed, Weekend Extra, The Late Late Show With Craig Kilborn

PLAN AHEAD

PHOTO COURTESY myspace.com/super8bitbrothers

NERDPOW, a concert with NERDCORE and GAMING performers, including Super 8-Bit Brothers (pictured), is coming Nov. 14. The show starts at 11 a.m. and there are cheap room rates for anyone who needs to stay overnight at the Holiday Inn. … DAN CHAON, author of You Remind me of Me will be reading in TUC 427 on the University of Cincinnati’s campus on Nov. 12. … In a couple of weeks our cover story is going to be about area NUDIST COLONIES. There will be information, as well as pictures, so get prepped for that.

Taylor SwifT

BengalS White Christmas raDiO CitY

Christmas sPeCtaCULar

Phish nasCar UC/OsU/UK

aLL nCaa games aLL events LOCaL & natiOnaL

Gift CertifiCates available!

★ The Best Seats at the Best Price ★

241-3301 317 W 4th street • Downtown

www.premiumtickets.net

november 04-10, 2009

Premium Blend, Shorties Watchin Shorties, Hurt Bert, The Shield, Last Comic Standing 2, Jimmy Kimmel Live

Looks like you’re going to have to buy your own movie tickets this week. Sorry, people. … We are, however, giving away a DVD copy of THE PROPOSAL, with Sandra Bullock and a frequently shirtless Ryan Reynolds. I just watched this movie and I would never buy it myself, but it’s a nice, mindless romantic comedy to have around the house. Head to citybeat.com and click on FREE STUFF to register to win. … If you like football or the BENGALS or even just BOLO TOSS, go to the SILVER SPRING HOUSE on Thursday. We’re going to be there giving away tickets to Bengals home games. Play Bolo Toss and win. … Also, see TO DO to the left of this to get information about the BLUES & BOOGIE PIANO SUMMIT at the Southgate House on Saturday.

november 04-10, 2009

MUSIC

4SPILL IT By MIKE BREEN

Rumors, Lies and General Misunderstandings

contact mike breen: mbreen@citybeat.com

PHOTOs courtesy Shake It records

Greg Dull: (left) and Drive-By Truckers set to release single on local Shake It Records

Where’s Eddie? Shake It releases tribute series to Southern Soul marvel Eddie Hinton 4By STEVEN ROSEN

s co-owner of Northside’s Shake It Records and its namesake record label, Darren Blase would seem to have all the work he can handle this year. In addition to running the busy and popular shop and coordinating its in-store events, he’s had to handle the growing interest in the WASSUP label’s Wussy, whose breakFor more on Shake It’s Eddie Hinton through third album this year has earned four-star series, go to www.shakeitrecords.com. reviews in Rolling Stone and Uncut and spawned a National Public Radio Song of the Day in “Happiness Bleeds.” But that hasn’t stopped him from launching his latest project, a series of limited-edition 45-rpm vinyl singles by the likes of Greg Dulli, Drive-By Truckers, Heartless Bastards and Wussy in tribute to the late Eddie Hinton. The first two 45s, covers of Hinton songs by Dulli and the Truckers, come out locally on Tuesday and nationally on Nov. 24. Blase is only pressing 2,000 copies of each record. He figures half of that run will be sold through Shake It and its mail-order operation, and half through other independent record stores. Ultimately he plans a set of 10 discs. After the Wussy and Bastards singles early next

year, there will be 45s from Cincinnati’s Buffalo Killers and Southern Soul singer/songwriter Donnie Fritts. Blase is working with other national and international acts, too. Who, you might ask, is Hinton? “He was a great songwriter, a phenomenal guitar player and a great singer,” Blase says. “Not many guys have all three of those things going. But he doesn’t put out new stuff, doesn’t come up in conversation and doesn’t have a publicist working his name.” Hinton, who died of a heart attack at age 51 in 1995, was a member of the fabled Muscle Shoals Rhythm Section (Ala.) in the late 1960s. He was there during an era when many of the great R&B and Pop stars came to the city’s FAME Studios to get the kind of gritty, authentic mixture of Soul, Country and Blues that Muscle Shoals musicians knew how to play. Hinton’s guitar is featured on records by Wilson Pickett, Aretha Franklin, Percy Sledge, The Box Tops, The Staple Singers and many more top artists. He was also a gifted songwriter. Whether on his own or working with partners like Marlin Greene and Donnie Fritts, he wrote such songs as Percy Sledge’s “Cover CONTINUES ON PAGE 364

november 04-10, 2009

• This year’s Halloween festivities seemed especially zombieheavy. Zombies are cool and all but, jeesh, what happened to originality in costuming? Unless you were Zombie Billy Mays. Now that’s funny. Anyway, if you did do the zombie dress-up thing and grew so attached you want to sport your costume again this weekend, you’d probably fit right in at Covington’s Molly Malone’s this Friday. That’s when local singer/songwriter Beau Alquizola puts on the show “Dead Musicians Society,” his annual benefit for the local Stop AIDS organization (stopaidscincinnati.org). Alquizola and his band, along with Mike Fair and the Adventure Seekers, Sean P. Hafer, Lovely Crash, Greg Mahan, Messerly & Ewing and The Newbees, will be performing tunes from their favorite deceased musicians, taking on everybody from The Carpenters to Bo Diddley to The Ramones. (Note to performers: Please double check your tribute song to make sure the artist is actually dead; despite Internet reports earlier this year, Kanye West and Rick Astley are, indeed, still among the living.) The fun starts at 9 p.m. • Speaking of dead guys, it was recently announced that the historical marker proposed for the former site of Herzog Studios (811 Race St., current downtown home to CityBeat’s offices) has been approved. Thanks to the hard work of the Cincinnati USA Music Heritage Foundation, Brian Powers and others, the marker will be installed at the site — where Hank Williams recorded trademark tunes like “I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry,” and artists like Flatt & Scruggs and The Delmore Brothers also worked — on Nov. 22, the day of the Cincinnati Entertainment Awards. Herzog was where Williams — one of the true icons of popular music — recorded “Lovesick Blues” in 1948 with WLW’s Pleasant Valley Boys, leading to wider popularity and an invitation to join the Grand Ole Opry (“I’m So Lonesome” was recorded in a second session the following summer.). • Indie Pop duo Bad Veins has been steadily touring since the summer release of its self-titled debut on Dangerbird Records (though the band did have to cancel several dates towards the end of a recent jaunt due to van problems). The Veins get a little break now, but they will be performing next Saturday, Nov. 14, at aliveOne in Mt. Adams PHOTO: ink tank pr with Electro Bad Veins pals You You’re Awesome (fresh off an appearance at the CMJ conference in New York City). DJ Matt Joy and DJ K-Smuv will spin at the event. The free 11 p.m. show is in celebration of aliveOne’s seventh anniversary. • We’ll wrap up with one more zombie-related item (words I never thought I’d type). Next Friday, Nov. 13, the University of Cincinnati’s Bearcast radio station is presenting a showcase of artists on the local Grasshopper Juice label. Part of Bearcast’s “Brews & Bands” series, the event is dubbed “Zombiewalk!” with students gathering at the Sigma Sigma Commons at 5 p.m. for costume prep, then going for a walk around campus and ending up at Baba Budan’s for the 9 p.m. showcase. The show features Kumasi MC, Wonky Tonk and Chick Pimp, Coke Dealer at a Bar. Find more info at bearcastradio.com and grasshopperjuice.com.

& JBM PROMOTIONS present

Southgate houSe 24 E 3 rd St • N ewpor t, KY

freedy johnSton with Billy Alletzhauer

November 5 @ 8:00pm

robbie fulkS & band with Nathan Holscher & The Ohio 5

November 13 @ 8:30pm

Michelle Shocked November 22 @ 8:00pm

WorkS ProgreSS adMiniStration

featuring Glen

Phillips, Sean Watkins, Luke Bulla, Sebastian Steinberg December 9 @ 8:00pm

www.jbmpromotions.com Tickets/Info 513-779-9462

4music listings CityBeat’s music listings are free. Send info to MIKE BREEN via email at mbreen@citybeat.com or fax at 513-665-4369. Listings are subject to change. See Club Directory for all club locations. H is CityBeat staff’s stamp of approval.

Concerts Guster — Pop Rock. Wednesday, Nov. 4. 8 p.m. Madison Theater, 730

Madison Ave., Covington. $22. 859-491-2444.

10. 7 p.m. The Bank of Kentucky Center, 500 Nunn Dr., Highland Heights. $34.75$69.75. 513-562-4949.

Clubs

David Barnes — Pop/Acoustic. Thursday, Nov. 5. 8 p.m. 20th Century

Wednesday November 4

Theatre, 3021 Madison Rd., Oakley. $12/$14 day of show. 513-731-8000.

Forever the Sickest Kids | Sing It Loud | Vita | My Favorite Highway — Rock. Thursday, Nov. 5. 6:30 p.m. Bogart’s, 2621 Vine St., Corryville. $13.50/$15.50 day of show. 513-281-8400.

Eric Benet | Mint Condition | Ledisi — R&B. Thursday, Nov. 5. 8 p.m. Music Hall, 1241 Elm St., Over-the-Rhine. $37.75-$59.75. 513-7443344. Freedy Johnston | Billy Alletzhauer (The Hiders) — Pop/ Roots. Thursday, Nov. 5. 8 p.m. Southgate House, 24 E. Third St., Newport. $12/$15 day of show. 859-431-2201.

Miranda Lambert — Country. Friday, Nov. 6. 8 p.m. Belterra, 777 Belterra Drive, Vevay. $50. 888-235-8377.

Buffalo Killers | Backyard Tire Fire | J Dorsey Blues Revival — Rock/Roots/Blues. Friday, Nov. 6. 9:00 p.m. Southgate House, 24

E. Third St., Newport. $8/$10 day of show. 859-431-2201. Drive, Vevay. $55. 888-235-8377.

The Savoy Family Band — Americana/Cajun. Saturday, Nov. 7. 8 p.m.

Parrish Auditorium, Miami University’s Hamilton Campus, Hamilton. $20-$10. 513-785-3157.

Blues & Boogie Piano Summit with Ricky Nye, Lluis Coloma, Lisa Otey, Barrelhouse Chuck and More —

H Blues/Boogie Woogie/Piano. Saturday, Nov. 7. 9 p.m. Southgate House, 24 E. Third St., Newport. $20. 859-431-2201.

Hatebreed | Cannibal Corpse | Unearth | Hate Eternal | Born of Osiris — Rock/Hardcore/Metal (see Sound Advice,

H page 41). Sunday, Nov. 8. 6:30 pm. Bogart’s, 2621 Vine St., Corryville, $20.50, $23.50 day of show. 513-281-8400

Bayside | All the Day Holiday | Pilot Around the Stars | Bazookas Go Bang — Rock/Pop/Indie. Sunday, Nov. 8. 7 p.m. Mad Hatter, 620 Scott St., Covington. $12/$15 day of show. 859-291-2233.

OK Go | Princeton — Pop Rock. Sunday, Nov. 8. 8:30 p.m. Southgate House, 24 E. Third St., Newport. $10/$13 day of show. 859-431-2201.

HThe Toasters | Voodoo Glow Skulls | The Pinstripes

| Loudmouth | Deals Gone Bad — Punk/Ska. Monday, Nov. 9. 7:30 p.m. Mad Hatter, 620 Scott St., Covington. $15. 859-291-2233. Hoots & Hellmouth | William Elliott Whitmore | Wake the Bear — Rock/Americana/Roots Rock (see Sound Advice, page

H 41). Monday, Nov. 9. 8:30 p.m. Southgate House (Parlour), 24 E. Third St., Newport. $8/$10 day of show. 859-431-2201.

Damage Lodge — Mt. Eerie | No Kids | Tara Jane ONeil. ExperimenHArt tal/Indie. $7. Blue Wisp Jazz Club — Blue Wisp Big Band. Jazz/Big Band. $15/$10 for students.

Carlo & Johnny — Jeff Henry. Acoustic. Free. Charlie’s Throttle Stop — Open Jam with Sonny Moorman Group. Rock/

Blues. Free.

Chez Nora — Ricky Nye and Lluis Coloma. Blues/Boogie Woogie. Free. Dirty Jack’s — Black Don Entertainment presents Mulee (CD release). Hip Hop. Cover.

Greenwich — “Midnight Sun Cafe” and Open Mic. Open mic. Cover. Havana Martini Club — Free Salsa Lessons and DJ Rudy Alvarez. Latin/ Salsa. Free.

HD Beans And Bottles Cafe — Open Mic. Open mic. Free. Jefferson Hall — Naked Karate Girls. Rock. Cover. John Phillips Restaurant and Bar — Don Gauck and Daveed. Soul/

Various. Free.

Knotty Pine — Dallas Moore. Outlaw Country. Free. Mahogany’s Coffeehouse Bar & Grill — Open jam with Dick and the

Roadmasters. Blues. Free.

Northside Tavern — Jason Snell. Indie. Free. The Sandbar — Blue Birds Trio. Classic Rock/R&B. Free. Southgate House (Lounge) — Michael and Travis from Frontier Folk

Nebraska. Folk/Roots Rock/Singer/Songwriter. Free.

Southgate House (Parlour) — Sound and Shape | The Frankl Project. Roots Rock. $5 for 21-plus, $8 for 18-20. The Stand — DJ Jahson. Hip Hop/Dance/Various. Free. Stanley’s Pub — Super-Massive. Reggae. Cover. Uncle Woody’s — Open mic with John Redell. Open mic. Free.

Thursday November 5 Arnold’s Bar and Grill — Dottie Warner with Wayne And Roy. Jazz/Blues.

Free.

Saving Abel | Red | Pop Evil | Taddy Porter — Rock/Jam.

Blind Lemon — John Ford. Acoustic. Free. Blue Wisp Jazz Club — Ron Enyard Quartet featuring Dan Karlsberg, Dan

Old Crow Medicine Show — Roots. Tuesday, Nov. 10. 7 p.m. Madison

Club Bronz — That Digital Kid | DJ Flex. Dance. Cover. Cosmo’s — The Turkeys. Rock/Folk. Free. Dee Felice — The Lee Stolar Trio. Jazz. Free. Dollar Bill Tavern — Kat’s Meow. Pop/Dance. Free.

Tuesday, Nov. 10 8 p.m. Bogart’s, 2621 Vine St., Corryville. $18.50/$21.50 day of show. 513-281-8400. Theater, 730 Madison Ave., Covington. $23. 859-491-2444.

Steely Dan — Rock/Classic Rock/Progressive. Tuesday, Nov. 10. H7:30 p.m. Taft Theatre, 317 E. Fifth St., Downtown. $57.50-$133.

Big ol’ Good Ones Served Here Wednesday November 4th

Free Play on Our Jukebox the only vinyl juke in Northside

Thursday November 5th • 10p-2a

Soul Funktion

featuring DJ Rudekat

Friday November 6th • 10p-2a

november 04-10, 2009

REO Speedwagon | Styx | Night Ranger — Classic Rock. Tuesday, Nov.

The Vic Chesnutt Band — Rock/Indie/Roots Rock. Wednesday, Nov. 4. 9:30 p.m. Southgate House, 24 E. Third St., Newport. $12/$15 day of show. 859-431-2201.

Blake Shelton — Country. Saturday, Nov. 7. 7 p.m. Belterra, 777 Belterra

513-721-8833.

Grover’s Soul Night Saturday November 7th • 10p-2a

Rock N Roll Karaoke w/ KEEH

FREE Wi-Fi

myspace.com/thecompletedivenorthside

1714 Hanfield Street • 513-541-9881

Drees and Eddie Felson. Jazz. $5.

The Greenwich — iolite. Jazz/Pop/R&B/Soul. $5 Jeff Ruby’s — Storyline. Pop/R&B. Free. Jefferson Hall — Fourth Day Echo. Rock. Cover. John Phillips Restaurant and Bar — 49ers. Acoustic/Various. Free. Mad Frog — Super-Massive. Reggae. Cover; ladies are free. Mill Street Sports Bar and Grill — The Jones’s. R&B/Soul. Free. Northside Tavern — Moonshine Drive (front room). Bluegrass. Free. Shady O’Grady’s — VIP Jam with Sonny Moorman Group. Rock/Blues/Open

jam. Free.

Southgate House (Lounge) — Theodore. Rock/Americana/Roots Rock. Free. Southgate House (Parlour) — Jason & the Punknecks | De Los Muertos |

Wonky Tonk. Rock/Punk/Roots Rock. $5 for 21-plus, $8 for 18-20.

The Stand — DJ Gerald. Dance/Electronic/New Wave/Various. Free. Stanley’s Pub — Bubble Life. Jam. Cover. Stockyard Cafe — Open Mic With John Redell . Open mic. Free. WIllie’s Sports Cafe (Hidden Valley) — Bob Cushing. Rock/Acoustic. Free.

Zola — The Turkeys. Rock/Folk. Free.

Friday November 6 Arnold’s Bar and Grill — Ricky Nye Inc. Blues/Boogie Woogie. Free. Art Damage Lodge — Peter J. Woods | Teeth Collection | Pus Drainer. Experimental/Noise. $5.

Bella Luna — Blue Birds Trio. R&B/Soft Rock. Free. Blue Wisp Jazz Club — Roni Ben Hur Quartet. Jazz. $10. Chez Nora — Annette Shepherd Band. Jazz. Free. Club Bronz — “d:Evolution 80s Night” with DJ Victim . Dance/80s. Cover (after

11 p.m.)

Dollar Bill Tavern — One Nite Stand. Pop/Dance. Free. Glendale Cock & Bull English Pub — The Turkeys. Acoustic. Free. Grandview Tavern & Grille — Jeff Henry and the Hollowbodys. Acoustic.

Free.

The Greenwich — The Last Boppers. Jazz. Cover. Havana Martini Club — Lamont Gillispie & 100 Proof (Chris Comer Trio with Jazz at 5 p.m.). Blues. Free.

Jayden’s Bar & Grill — Saving Stimpy. Rock. $5. Jeff Ruby’s — Kelly Red and The Hammerheads. Blues/R&B. Free. Jefferson Hall — Cover Model. Rock/Alternative. Cover. Jim and Jack’s on the River — The Avenues. Oldies. Cover. John Phillips Restaurant and Bar — Rick and Rick. Acoustic/Various.

Free.

Knotty Pine — Flatline. Rock. Cover. Mad Hatter — Giant Wow | Sweet Ray Laurel | Della Cado | Papa Shango |

Animal Circles. Rock. $5

Madison Theater — Frontiers: The Journey Tribute. Rock/Pop. $10. Mahogany’s Coffeehouse Bar & Grill — Melissa Hayes. Blues/Folk.

Free.

Mansion Hill Tavern — Johnny Fink and the Intrusion. Blues. $4. Molly Malone’s Irish Pub (Pleasant Ridge) — Dysfunction Junction | Freeform Connection. Rock/Comedy/Jam. Free.

Molly Malone’s Covington — Dead Musicians Society with The H Newbees, Lovely Crash, The Beau Alquizola Band, Messerly and Ewing, Sean P. Hafer, Greg Mahan and Mike Fair and the Adventure Seekers. Various (see Spill It, page 33). Cover.

Northside Tavern — Jake Speed & the Freddies. Folk. Free. Olde Fort Thomas Pub — Big Rock Club. Rock. Cover. Phat Daddy’s — The Jones’s. R&B/Soul. Free. The Pirate’s Den — The Gamut. Classic Rock. Free. R.P. McMurphy’s Irish Pub — Three Day Rule. Rock. $3. Rick’s Tavern & Grille — Powerhouse Boogie Band. Pop/Dance/Various. $5. Southgate House (Lounge) — Los Honchos. Rock. Free. Southgate House (Parlour) — Wake the Bear | A Decade to Die For. Acoustic/Roots Rock/Singer/Songwriter. Free.

The Stand — DJ Ice Cold Tony C. Dance/Various. Free. Stanley’s Pub — Lucky & the Magic | Iolite. Jazz/Pop/R&B/Soul/Various.

Cover.

Stockyard Cafe — Sparrow Bellows. Rock. Free. Terry’s Turf Club — Eric Campbell & The Bevadors. Jazz. Free. Woodies Tavern — Sunset Betty. Rock. Cover.

Saturday November 7 Arnold’s Bar and Grill — Cincinnati Dancing Pigs. Americana. Free. Behle Street Cafe — Jeff Henry. Acoustic. Free. Bella Luna — Blue Birds Trio. R&B/Soft Rock. Free. Blue Rock Tavern & Speakeasy — Illcitizen. Rock/Indie. Free. Blue Wisp Jazz Club — Roni Ben Hur Quartet. Jazz. $10. The Celestial — Frank Vincent Trio. Jazz/Standards. Free. Chez Nora — Annette Shepherd Band. Jazz. Free. Claddagh Irish Pub — Sonny Moorman Group. Rock/Blues. Free. Club Bronz — “Indie/Electro Night” with That Digital Kid. Dance/Electronic/ Indie. Cover.

The Comet — The Tillers. Roots/Folk. Free. Dee Felice — The “New” Sleepcat Band. Jazz/Swing. Free. Dirty Jack’s — Everyday Endeavor | Riverfront Charade | shoe. Rock. $5-$7. Dollar Bill Tavern — Vintage. Pop/Dance. Free. Fairfield Community Arts Center — Wild Carrot. Folk. $15. The Greenwich — Andrea Cefalo Trio. Jazz. $5 Havana Martini Club — Acapulco. Latin. $10. Jayden’s Bar & Grill — Saving Stimpy. Rock. $5. Jefferson Hall — Forehead. Rock. Cover.

Jim and Jack’s on the River — The Avenues. Oldies. Cover. John Phillips Restaurant and Bar — Rick and Rick. Acoustic/Various.

Southgate House (Lounge) — Jonah Smith. Singer/Songwriter. Free. Yardbirds Southern BBQ — Sonny Moorman Group (6 p.m.). Rock/

Knotty Pine — Flatline. Rock. Cover. Latitudes Anderson — Vaughn and Co. | Mike Siezemore Band. Rock. Free. Mad Hatter — Close To Home (CD release show) with Beneath The Sky, Pluto

Zion United Church of Christ Norwood — “Leo Coffeehouse”

Free.

Revolts, I am The Messenger and The Paramedic. Rock/Hardcore/Pop Punk. $5.

Mainstay Rock Bar — Wax Factory. Rock. Cover. Mansion Hill Tavern — Camargo Road. Blues. $3. Miller’s Fill Inn — Better Late Than Never. Rock. Cover. Molly Malone’s Irish Pub (Pleasant Ridge) — Knott Fibbin. Irish. Free. Northside Tavern — DANCE_MF. Dance/Indie. Free. Poppy’s Tavern — Blues Merchants. Blues. Free. The Redmoor — Blue Tip. Classic Rock. $5 R.P. McMurphy’s Irish Pub — Waiting On Wally. Rock. $3. Rick’s Tavern & Grille — Powerhouse Boogie Band. Pop/Dance/Various. $5. Shady O’Grady’s — The Medicine Men. Blues. Cover. Southgate House (Lounge) — Mark Schulte Trio. Jazz. Free. The Stand — DJ Matt Joy. Rock/Hip Hop/Dance/Funk. $5. Stanley’s Pub — Dick & the Roadmasters. Blues. Cover. Terry’s Turf Club — Eric Campbell & The Bevadors. Jazz. Free. Willie’s Sports Cafe Covington — Corner Pocket. Rock. Free. Woodies Tavern — Cef Michael Band. Rock/Blues/Country. Cover.

Sunday November 8 Allyn’s Cafe — Blue Birds Big Band. Classic Rock/R&B. $3. Blind Lemon — Jeff Henry. Acoustic. Free. Blue Rock Tavern & Speakeasy — Ramming Speed | Fucked For Life | The Read | Sabre | The Buster League. Rock/Hardcore/Punk (see H Sound Advice, page 41). Free.

Blue Wisp Jazz Club — Souse. Jazz/Funk. $5. Boswell Alley — Wild Mountain Berries (6 p.m.). Blues. Free. Cardi’s Bar & Grill — Bob Cushing. Rock/Acoustic. Free. Club Bronz — That Digital Kid. Dance. Free. Cock ‘N Bull — The Turkeys. Rock/Country. Free. Comet — Comet Bluegrass Allstars. Bluegrass. Free. Mansion Hill Tavern — Open Blues Jam with Them Bones. Blues. Free. Sonny’s All Blues Lounge — Sonny’s All Blues Band featuring Lonnie Bennett. Blues. Free.

Blues. Free.

with Cash Ownly and the Badaires, Lisa Biales & Doug Hamilton and Don Pedi. Acoustic. Cover.

Monday November 9 Blue Wisp Jazz Club — Open Jam Session Hosted by Sandy Suskind.

Jazz. $5.

John Phillips Restaurant and Bar — Rick and Scotty Anderson. Jazz/Roots. Free.

Mad Frog — Tropicoso. Latin. Cover. Mainstrasse Village Pub — The Turkeys. Rock/Folk. Free. Molly Malone’s of Covington — Scott Risner. Bluegrass. Free. Northside Tavern — The Quartet. Jazz. Free. Sitwell’s — The Marmalade Brigade. Acoustic. Free. Southgate House (Lounge) — Open Mic Night: Ryan Malott. Rock/ Singer/Songwriter/Various. Free.

Stanley’s Pub — Open Jazz Jam with Wade Baker. Jazz/Jam. Free.

Tuesday November 10 Blue Wisp Jazz Club — Jack Finucane Quartet. Jazz. $5. Club Bronz — “Invasion” with DJ-Chuck_G & DJ Victim. Dance/Goth/ Industrial. Free.

Dee Felice — The 7 Piece Royal Palm Orchestra. Jazz. Free. Havana Martini Club — Fathead Davis Trio (shows at 5:30 p.m. and 8

p.m.). Blues/Reggae. Free.

John Phillips Restaurant and Bar — Danny Frazier and Jerome. Roots/Country. Free.

Molly Malone’s of Covington — Roger Drawdy. Celtic/Irish. Free. R.P. McMurphy’s — Open mic. Open mic. Free. Southgate House (Lounge) — Karaoke with DJ Swirl. Rock/Indie/ Various. Free.

Southgate House (Parlour) — Self Evident | Ampline | Zebulon Pike | 1,000 Arms. Rock/Indie. $5 for 21-plus, $8 for 18-20.

Stanley’s Pub — Rumpke Mountain Boys. Bluegrass. Cover. WIllie’s Sports Cafe (Hidden Valley) — Sonny Moorman . Rock/

Blues. Free.

Zola — The Northern Kentucky Bluegrass Band. Bluegrass. Free.

u Full Mebnle Availa

PRizEs!

Pub Quiz!

Every Tuesday! Rathskeller • 8pm

151 W McMillan - Clifton Heights 513-281-3600 www.christysandlenhardts.com y’s nler! a t S te w it llo n tw o f o

$1.00 Bottle s Mon-F ri 4-6pm

Every Wednesday

Reggae Night

w/SupeR MaSSive THU 11/5 • Jazz/Funk

BuBBle life Every Friday • 6-9p • Acoustic Mike holMeS FRI 11/6 • R&B/Soul

lucky & the Magic w/iolite

SAT 11/7 • Rock

Dick & the RoaDMaSteRS Every Monday Jazz Night w/WaDe BakeR BaND Every Tuesday • BlUEgRASS

RuMpke Mt BoyS 323 Stanley Ave • 513-871-6249 One Block East of The Precinct

stockyard Cafe

Music, Food & Drinks

Help Us Celebrate Cheryl’s 1st Anniversary! Specials All Week! (Nov 3-6)

FREE FOOD • $1 Domestic Bottles (4-9pm) Special Events! • All ARE WElCOmE!

live music • 8:30p with Sparrow

Bellows (Rock)

www.myspace.com/stockyardcafe

3112 Spring Grove Ave . Cincinnati, OH 45225

513-591-2233

november 04-10, 2009

friday, November 6 • 4pm-?

Cheryl’s Big Party

4WHERE’S EDDIE?: FROM PAGE 33

4 club directory Allyn’s Cafe — 3538 Columbia Parkway, Columbia-Tusculum. 513-8715779.

859-261-1029.

Arnold’s Bar and Grill — 210 E. Eighth St., Downtown. 513-421-6234.

Mainstrasse Village Pub — 619 Main Street, Covington. 859-431-5552.

Art Damage Lodge — 4120 Hamilton Ave., Northside. 513-555-5555. Behle Street Cafe — 50 E. Rivercenter Blvd., Covington. 859-291-4100. Bella Luna — 4632 Eastern Ave., Linwood. 513-871-5862. Blind Lemon — 936 Hatch Street, Mount Adams. 513-241-3885. Blue Rock Tavern & Speakeasy — 4114 Hamilton Ave., Northside. 513-542-6644. Blue Wisp Jazz Club — 318 E. Eighth St., Downtown. 513-241-9477. Boswell Alley — 1686 Blue Rock Street, Northside. 513-681-8100. Cardi’s Bar & Grill — 101 Bacher Square, Fairfield. 513-889-3952. Carlo & Johnny — 9769 Montgomery Road, Montgomery. 513-936-8600. The Celestial — 1071 Celestial St., Mount Adams. 513-241-4455. Charlie’s Throttle Stop — 7121 Dixie Hwy., Fairfield. 513-874-6111. Chez Nora — 530 Main St., Covington. 859-491-8027. Claddagh Irish Pub — 1 Levee Way, Suite 2122,Newport on the Levee, Newport. 859-581-8888.

Mill Street Sports Bar and Grill — 101 Mill St., Lockland. 513-761-1587. Miller’s Fill Inn — 52 Donnermeyer Drive, Bellevue. 859-431-3455. Molly Malone’s Irish Pub (Pleasant Ridge) — 6111 Montgomery Road, Montgomery. 513-531-0700. Molly Malone’s of Covington — 112 E. Fourth Street, Covington. 859-491-6659. Northside Tavern — 4163 Hamilton Ave., Northside. 513-5423603. Olde Fort Thomas Pub — 1041 Ft. Thomas Ave., Fort Thomas. 859-441-1927. Phat Daddy’s — 7655 Reading Road, Roselawn. 513-761-3525. The Pirate’s Den — 1935 Anderson Ferry Rd., Covedale. 513-9223898.

Cock ‘N Bull — 601 Main Street, Covington. 859-581-4253.

Poppy’s Tavern — 5510 Rybolt Road, Dent. 513-574-6333.

The Comet — 4579 Hamilton Ave., Northside. 513-541-8900.

R.P. McMurphy’s — 2910 Wasson Road, Hyde Park. 513-531-3300.

Cosmo’s — 604 Main Street, Covington. 859-261-1330.

The Redmoor — 3187 Linwood Ave., Mount Lookout. 513-871-6789.

Dee Felice — 529 Main St., Covington. 859-261-2365.

Rick’s Tavern & Grille — 5955-5 Boymel Dr., Fairfield. 513-874-1992.

Dollar Bill Tavern — 8074 U.S. 42, Florence. 859-746-3600. Fairfield Community Arts Center — 411 Wessel Drive, Fairfield. 513-867-5348. Glendale Cock & Bull English Pub — 275 E. Sharon Road , Glendale. 513-771-4253. Grandview Tavern & Grille — 2220 Grandview Dr., Hyde Park. 859-341-8439. The Greenwich — 2442 Gilbert Ave., Walnut Hills. 513-221-1151.

The Sandbar — 4625 Kellogg Ave, California. 513-533-3810. Shady O’Grady’s — 9443 Loveland-Madeira Road, Loveland. 513-791-2753. Sitwell’s — 324 Ludlow Ave., Clifton. 513-281-7487. Sonny’s All Blues Lounge — 4040 Reading Road, North Avondale. 513-281-0410. Southgate House (Lounge) — 24 E. Third St., Newport. 859-431-2201.

Havana Martini Club — 5th & Race streets, Downtown. 513-651-2800.

Southgate House (Parlour) — 24 E. Third St., Newport. 859-431-2201.

HD Beans And Bottles Cafe — 6721 Montgomery Road, Silverton. 513-793-6036.

The Stand — 3195 Linwood Ave., Mount Lookout. 513-871-5006.

Jayden’s Bar & Grill — 7899 Dream St., Florence. 859-371-4444. Jeff Ruby’s — 700 Walnut St., Downtown. 513-784-1200. Jefferson Hall — 1 Levee Way ,Newport on the Levee Newport. 859-491-6200. Jim and Jack’s on the River — 3456 River Road, Riverside. 513-251-7977.

november 04-10, 2009

Mansion Hill Tavern — 502 Washington Ave., Newport. 859-581-0100.

Club Bronz — 4029 Hamilton Ave., Northside. 513-591-2100.

Dirty Jack’s — 5912 Vine St., Elmwood Place. 513-242-2800.

Mainstay Rock Bar — 301 W 5th St., Downtown. 513-721-7625.

John Phillips Restaurant and Bar — 2809 Dixie Highway, Crestview Hills. 859-344-0444.

Stanley’s Pub — 323 Stanley Ave., Columbia-Tusculum. 513-871-6249. Stockyard Cafe — 3112 Spring Grove Ave. , Camp Washington. 513-591-2233. Terry’s Turf Club — 4618 Eastern Ave., Linwood. 513-533-4222. Uncle Woody’s — 339 Calhoun St., Corryville. 513-751-2518. WIllie’s Sports Cafe (Hidden Valley) — 19325 Schmarr Dr., Lawrenceburg. 812-537-0512.

Knotty Pine — 6947 Cheviot Rd., White Oak. 513-741-3900.

Willie’s Sports Cafe Covington — 401 Crescent Ave., Covington. 859-581-1500.

Latitudes Anderson — 7426 Beechmont Ave., Anderson Twp. 513-233-9888.

Woodies Tavern — 10020 Demia Way, Florence. 859-282-1264.

Mad Frog — 1 E. McMillan St., Corryville. 513-784-9119. Mad Hatter — 620 Scott St., Covington. 859-291-2233.

Yardbirds Southern BBQ — 932 W. State St., Trenton. 513-988-9690.

Madison Theater — 730 Madison Ave., Covington. 859-491-2444.

Zion United Church of Christ Norwood — 2332 Sherwood Lane, Norwood. 513-531-5400.

Mahogany’s Coffeehouse Bar & Grill — 3715 Winston Ave., Latonia.

Zola — 626 Main St., Covington. 859-261-7510.

Me,” Dusty Springfield’s “Breakfast in Bed” and The Box Tops’ “Choo Choo Train.” As a singer who idolized Otis Redding, he had a roughhewn but intensely impassioned, pleading voice that is the epitome of blue-eyed Soul. It is what Lucinda Williams probably was dreaming about when she titled an album Car Wheels on a Gravel Road. Yet, to borrow the title of one of his albums, Hinton was a Hard Luck Guy. His first album, Very Extremely Dangerous, came out in 1978 just as his label, Capricorn Records, collapsed. It quickly disappeared from view with little publicity, although it now has classic status. He also battled addictions and mental illness later in life, which saddled his career and limited his recorded output and touring abilities. “My introduction to Eddie Hinton was in the backroom of Mole’s Records in Clifton in about 1987 or1988, when I found a copy of Very Extremely Dangerous for about 99 cents and thought that it looked cool,” Blase says. “So I took it home and thought it was great.” Dulli’s 45 pairs his moody, cathartic version of “Cover Me” with a take on the fateful “Hard Luck Guy.” One side of the Drive-By Truckers’ release features Patterson Hood singing “Everybody Needs Love” to a soulfully bluesy Country Rock arrangement. On the other, bassist Shonna Tucker wails her forlorn heart out on a slowly building, thrillingly melodramatic

arrangement of a ballad called “Where’s Eddie?” (The Truckers wrote an original tribute to Hinton, “Sandwiches For The Road,” which appeared on the group’s debut album.) You really have to know Hinton to know that last one — he co-wrote it with Fritts for an album that Scottish pop star Lulu recorded in Muscle Shoals back in 1969. And the Truckers do indeed know him — they’re all from the Muscle Shoals area of Alabama and Hood’s father, David Hood, is a bassist who played with Hinton in the Muscle Shoals Rhythm Section. “Patterson’s daddy played bass on that song, so that’s how it came into my life,” Tucker says, in a phone interview before a Texas gig. “It’s a cool track and not that many people have heard it. I happen to be good friends with Donnie Fritts, who co-wrote the song, and he’s told me vivid details of the night they wrote it. I’m not sure I can tell you all the details, but I’ll just say they ended up finishing it in a tree. It’s always been a special song to me. It’s incredibly beautiful and it’s funny that Eddie wrote this song about himself for a woman to sing.” Essentially, Blase is offering musicians $1,000 to cut Hinton covers when they can — it is not a moneymaker for anyone involved but rather a labor of love, he says. “The reason for doing it as a series of 45s is he’s a great singles songwriter and never had hits on his own,” Blase says. “And it’s my favorite format. If you can’t do it in three minutes, do not do it. I like the aesthetic of it.” ©

4the hip hop (un)scene

Go DJ Examining the MC/DJ relationship 4by ill poetic

what a DJ should get paid, ask other artists or DJs how they split and go off of that. Show up at the venue for sound check (I’ve been bad about this in the past). Study the sound, room and mic before the show. Oh, and help your DJ carry all his shit into the venue for sound check. Don’t just go post up at the bar until you go on. All MCs have to carry is a mic. DJs have a little more to worry about. Finally, not to get all KRS-One on y’all, but I have to drop some quick performance commandments. I’m not saying I’m the dopest performer in the world, but these “trends” need to stop, because, from a crowd perspective, they make you sound straight shitty. • Thou shall not rap over thine vocals (it sounds like shit) • Thall shall not bring 40 of thy boys on stage (Thou art not Wu-Tang) • Thou shall not cup microphone • Thou shall not clap for own performance and B-Boy stance thine other acts on bill • Thou shall not grab genetalia excessively unless female or covering Prince. (I did this on my first televised show and all my mom could

say when she saw it was, “Why are you grabbing yourself?”) • Thou shall look at audience when performing • Thou shall not spend thy set blaming ye soundman and DJ for not making your set bang (if there’s an issue, address it after the show and work around problems) I never said there were 10 commandments. Rinse and repeat the first three. A DJ and artist’s interaction is vital to a good show. Something I learned years ago is that no one will remember your lyrics and no one will remember your beats — the audience came to make a moment and memory. It’s your job to give them that memory, and it’s easier said than done. Don’t make a memory for yourself at the expense of the people. This is how you stand out. Next month, I’ll return with DJ Drizzle to break down the other side of the artist/DJ relationship. ILL POETIC is a hard-hustling multitasker in the Hip Hop world.

november 04-10, 2009

remember the first time I decided I wanted music to be my career and/or life. Still in high school, my friend Zone and I went up to Columbus to see Method Man and Redman perform. When I saw Method Man walk over the crowd’s hands like Jesus walked on water, it was a wrap. Those dudes knew how to put on a show. Now, a week prior to that, I had just rocked my first ever talent show at my high school, and you couldn’t have told me we weren’t the flyest performers on the planet. After seeing Meth and Red, as well as video of my wack-ass performance, I was quickly humbled. Good DJ/artist combinations are hard to come by, but when they’re good, they’re great. With that said, the next few columns are going to deal with the DJ and artist’s relationship. Now, depending on where you hustle in the Hip Hop spectrum, this can mean one of two things, so I’m splitting them up into two columns. The first one will deal with the artist and DJ in the traditional sense — show interaction and performance. Next time, I’ll deal with the club DJ who promotes and pushes an artist’s mixtapes and projects (think Drama and Jeezy, pre-Twitter beef). To give both sides of this equation, I had to take in some advice from DJ Rare Groove. For those who don’t know him, he’s DJed in Cincy for over a decade, is on local radio, tours the world and, most importantly, lives off of his craft. The man knows how to put a dope set together (and his record collection looks like the stockroom at Kmart). One of the biggest ideas Groove brought to the table was the actual set up of an artist’s show. To paraphrase, a good show is broken up into three parts. How you want to split these sets is up to you. But splitting your set into sections allows you to adapt to the type of club or crowd you’re performing to. Maybe you have a really good set of female songs that would work better at Baba Budan’s than The Ritz. It’s nice to have that in the back pocket. Rehearse with your DJ as much as possible for each show. Not only does it make your set a lot more seamless, it allows both of you to nitpick the set and come up with little intricate ideas that separate you two from everyone else. Find a good rehearsal space where you can move around (preferably with a mirror in front of you). Study your movements, both with your body and how you move across the stage. Study footage of past shows to see what you like and don’t like. Study your favorite performers live or on YouTube. As you begin getting paid for shows, the artist/DJ split for money should be discussed before the checks are cut. If you’re not sure

We’re offering our biggest discounted rates ever!

Print - Online - Eblasts

Thursday Nov 5 650 north

Call your CityBeat advertising rep about our holiday advertising options.

513-665-4700

Friday Nov 6 Natalie Wells

Saturday Nov 7 Fly Band

Sunday

$2.00 Domestic Drafts & $3.50 Jager Bombers

Monday

Guitarist Ron Ben-Hur

$1.00 Pull n’ Pray & $3.50 Jager Bomers

Fri & Sat, November 6-7

Tuesday

Cigar Night w/ Party Source 5pm-9pm Discounted Pitchers

From Chicago: Petra van Nuis, Andy Brown, Joe Policastro Quintet Fri & Sat, November 27-28

Wednesday

$2.00 Selected Drafts

Thursday

$1.00 Domestic Drafts CHECK US OUT AT Myspace.com/beersellar or jbfins.com

60 Taps • 120 Bottles • Live Music 301 Riverboat Row • Newport, KY

november 04-10, 2009

859.431.6969

Guitarist Dan Faehnle Band Sat, December 5

Wed 11/4

8:30pm • $10

Blue Wisp Big Band

Thu 11/5 5-7:30pm • 18&Under Jazz Jam (Intermediate &Up) • 8pm • $5 Enyard/Karlsberg Quartet • 11:00pm Open Mic Nite w/ Bayb King 4:30pm • Free Happy Hour w/ Fourth Floor feat. Tim Deardorff & Geoff Pittman • 8:30pm Israeli Guitarist Roni Ben Hur Quartet • 11:59pm • suggested donation $5 Delbert Williams Sat 11/7 8:30pm Israeli Guitarist Roni Ben Hur Quartet

Fri 11/6

• Midnight til 2am • No Cover!! Happy hour prices for the ladies

Ride the Shuttle to Bengals Home Games $5 Roundtrip!

Soft Romantic Jazz w/Hot Guitarist Steve

Barrone Sun 11/8 6:30pm • $20 donation JEEP Fundraiser w/ Israeli Guitarist Roni Ben Hur • 9:00pm • $5 Souse

Check us out on Facebook!

thebluewisp.com

318 E 8th St • 513-241-9477

4locals only

Super Bowls Ron Esposito enters New Age music world 4interview by brian baker

f Ron Esposito printed out a hard copy of his résumé, it’d have to be on a continuous roll of teletype paper. Exploratory drummer at 10. Guitarist at 12. At Ohio University, while playing in Rock and Folk bands, he was on the student concert board that booked Jose Feliciano with some obscure British opening act called Led Zeppelin. At OU, he met White Panther activist/poet John Sinclair, eventually producing a couple of spoken word recordings for him. He managed Boston’s top-line Jazz club, The Jazz Workshop, and was road manager for artists on CTI Records. After moving to Cincinnati in 1986, Esposito was music director/producer/ on-air personality for public radio’s WVXU for nearly 20 years and bassist for the High Street Rhythm Rockers (later Greg Schaber and High Street) for 12 years. And that’s just the Reader’s Digest version. Four years ago, WVXU’s ownership change ended Esposito’s employment, which coincided with his High Street departure. Looking for significant change, Esposito shifted gears. Pursuing his longstanding spirituality/philosophy interests, he became certified as a Life Coach and Enneagram teacher/trainer. “You may not recognize it, but the universe is always on time,” says Esposito over coffee at Sitwell’s. “Xavier sold WVXU, I got my walking papers and at the same time, High Street had been playing every beer joint from Indianapolis to Columbus and Chicago to Memphis, and even though the music was fantastic, I was ready for a change. I’ve always had a philosophic/ metaphysical/spiritual bent, so I got my life coaching certification. Esposito pushed his musical endeavors in a new direction as well with his discovery of Tibetan and crystal singing bowls. “I was working in the realms of consciousness, spirituality and personal growth, and I think the bowls and their vibration fit right in line with that,” says Esposito. “That’s not to say I couldn’t be a life coach and still be playing ‘Back Door Man.’ I was just ready for something new.” Esposito first heard recorded bowls in a massage therapist’s office, then experienced them musically through German New Age artist Deuter. After acquiring both Tibetan brass and quartz crystal singing bowls and experimenting, Esposito hit the studio with colleague Deborah Ooten, keyboardist Billy Larkin and producer Ric Hordinski, recording last year’s Lifting the Veil. Essentially two long, spoken word meditations on the Enneagram — a

metaphysical examination of personality types intended to point the way to higher consciousness — Lifting the Veil was more atmospheric than musical but it set the stage for Esposito to take his singing bowl explorations to a new level on his latest album, Open Heart. “I wanted to do an instrumental record that put the bowls in a different context,” says Esposito. “I like playing the bowls as a musical instrument. Usually the bowls are placed in a healing context because of their vibrational qualities and I’m all good with that, but I come from a musical background.” On Open Heart, Esposito (on bowls, kalimba, guitar and bass) re-teamed with guitarist Hordinski and other contributors, including Jim Feist (tabla/percussion), Janice T. Sunflower (Native American flutes), Doug Perry (dulcimer) and Angie Pepper (Gospel vocalist on the track “Om Shanti”), to craft a transcendent and reflective work that is both meditational and musically engaging. “The brass bowls are played with a wooden striker that gets that bell-like sound, then you stir them and get them to sing,” Esposito explains. “Like the quartz crystal bowls, they have a long, resonant singing tone. What I like to do with the bowls is start stacking the notes. What I’m doing is forming all these chords with combinations of notes that are constantly morphing and shifting, like clouds slowly going across the sky. There’s all this subtle stuff going on. For me, it’s like a tractor beam for the mind.” Returning to Jazz, Esposito plays acoustic bass with the Chris Comer Trio at the Havana Martini Bar on Fridays at 5 p.m., he life coaches, teaches and trains at the Conscious Living Center, is active as a presenter for the International Enneagram Association, hosts Waves of a New Age on WAIF (88.3 FM) Tuesdays at 3 p.m. and occasionally plays the bowls live for yoga and meditation centers throughout the region. With Open Heart being playlisted on John Diliberto’s syndicated Echoes radio show, Esposito is already thinking ahead to his next recording, in which he’s planning to balance the bowls with deep space synths, cello and violin. But first comes a trip to Cuba to study the ways religion and spirituality are steered by music and art. It’s part and parcel of one of the most overstuffed datebooks in the city. “I keep a detailed calendar,” says Esposito with a laugh. “Nowadays, I get up at 8 a.m. and go until midnight. In one regard, I’m no different than any other musician who’s playing gigs, it’s just my gigs now are yoga and meditation places.” For more on RON ESPOSITO’s many endeavors, go to www.ronesposito.com.

www.madisontheateronline.com

Wednesday November 4

Guster

Friday November 6

Frontiers

The Journey Tribute Tuesday November 10 89.7 WNKU presents

Old Crow Medicine Show Friday November 13

The Movement w/Supermassive & Buckra

Saturday November 14 Miller Lite Presents

Luke Bryan w/Fast Ryde

Friday November 20

The Endgame Tour

Megadeath

w/Machine Head, Suicide Silence, Arcanium

Sunday November 29

Stocking Stuffer Ball

w/Wanda Kayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s DJ & Karaoke, Dr. Brian Wiess w/ Raygun Massacre, Blues in the Schools kids blues band, Author Murray Dancers, Elvis by Paul Haiverstad, Bobby Mackey & the Big Mac Band, Dick & the Roadmasters

94.1 XMas Show w/Gym Class Heroes 730 Madison Ave | Covington, KY 859-491-2444

NoEEvt-shiRt at liepusblacstRawl FR

while su

november 04-10, 2009

Friday December 18

PUB L CReAmbW er 19

13th Annual The Red Carpet Return of the

Vote now at CEA.Citybeat.com

november 04-10, 2009

Trashie Fashion Awards presented by

Fairmount Girls

Cincinnati Entertainment Awards

November 22, 2009.

Madison Theater Doors at 6pm. $15 advance. $18 day of event.

Tickets on sale at www.CEA.Citybeat.com

includes access to the exclusive CEA Afterparty at MadHatter presented by Dewey's Pizza

proceeds benefit the Cincinnati USA Music Heritage Foundation

4 sound advice

CBrecomMends

music news tid-bits and other morsels of relative insignificance

Stop Using Rap as a Weapon Four teenagers living near Salt Lake City are in deep doo doo following a recent prank. While other teens engage in such antics as smashing roadside mailboxes and putting flaming bags of dog shit on neighbors’ front porches, these Utah teens stepped over the line when they had the audacity to rap their food order at a McDonald’s drive-thru. Inspired by a video on YouTube, the teens did their best LL Cool J as they ordered their artery clogging grub, only to have the cops called on them. The kids were cited for disorderly conduct; the drive-thru employee was said to have felt “her safety was at risk.” That must’ve been some wiggity-wack Big Mac attack.

HATEBREED WITH CANNIBAL CORPSE, UNEARTH, HATE ETERNAL AND BORN OF OSIRIS Sunday • Bogart’s If you’re reading this, chances are you know what to expect from this show and are surprised to see it being written about here. If that’s the case, all you need to know is that the new Hatebreed is awesome and there’s a hilarious bonus track. Now, for those of you to whom this doesn’t apply, let me explain who Hatebreed is and why you should go to this show. The band’s music is intense and brutal, the breakdowns are insane and its mosh is undeniable. And while Hatebreed’s sound has remained fairly consistent during the 16 years the band has been around, the band members have done a good job at keeping things interesting. Keep in mind, however, that Hatebreed can and will make your great-grandmother throw a couch through the window … so make sure you don’t play them around her. When it comes to commercial success, Hatebreed is known as the most successful Hardcore band in history, selling over a million albums, receiving a Grammy nomination, headlining tours all over the world and collaborating with everyone from Hip Hop artists to members of various Metal bands. Hatebreed’s singer even became the host of MTV2’s Headbanger’s Ball. One of the things that makes the band so appealing is that instead of your typical “I hate the world and all women” lyrics that so many Hardcore and Metal bands use, a lot of Hatebreed’s lyrics are positive and inspiring. They have angry songs, of course, but singer Jamey Jasta keeps it real. While most people who play or listen to extreme music are very judgmental of kids who identify with other music genres (like Goth or Emo), Jasta isn’t. Rather than picking on them, he recognizes that everyone goes through phases in music and fans come and go. And that’s definitely something refreshing to hear. (TTA)

HOOTS & HELLMOUTH WITH WILLIAM ELLIOTT WHITMORE AND WAKE THE BEAR Monday • Southgate House (Parlour) In “Root of the Industry,” the opening track on the June release The Holy Open Secret, Hoots & Hellmouth makes its seditious tendencies clear. Take a listen to this Roots Rock group without inspecting the lyrics and you might figure that their country-fried acoustic work is moonshine-making music without any teeth to it. That’s not the case. While this group has its earnest, amicable moments, “Root” is an agrarian protest that denounces the destructive capabilities of capitalism. “So they tore up the orchard and planted a house,” it begins, “From the seeds of the industry/ To build a community/ It’s a crust for the mudpie/ That no one wants to eat.” By its end, the song becomes a lament that booms with rugged gusto: “So gather up your axes/Forget about paying your taxes/And hack your way to the root of the industry!” Almost every Holy Open composition is charged with this sort of wry, literate thunder. Driven by guitarists/vocalists Sean Hoots and Andrew Gray (a nickname for the latter explains the “Hellmouth”), H&H’s sound has relatives in the likes of The Hackensaw Boys, Old Crow Medicine Show and Drive-By Truckers. Equally comfortable with taking songs slow or turning up the pace, these scamps (whose ranks go as low as three and high as six) call Philadelphia home, not somewhere in the Deep South. The group’s twangy, mandolin-rich style seems like a throwback to the Dust Bowl era, but the band members insist that they’re rooted in the present. If there’s no other reason to give Hoots & Hellmouth a go, do it for the promising titles found on its self-titled album: “Two Hearts, a Snake and a Concubine,” “This Hand Is a Mighty Hand” and “West of Where the Sun Goes Down” could pass as names of Nelson Algren stories, which is a hell of a compliment. (Reyan Ali)

Live Nation Concerts: Now With More Drunks? We know it’s a big source of revenue for music venues, but, as anyone who has been bumped, punched, vomited on or annoyed by overly drunk fans at a concert can attest, clubs and concert halls really don’t need to encourage people to get more blindingly drunk. Live Nation — which owns a shitton of music venues across the country — recently announced a partnership with 901 Silver Tequila, Justin Timberlake’s new high-end booze line. The deal makes the mind-and-panty-erasing drink the “Official Tequila Sponsor” of most LN venues, giving the company high visibility at each site. Minimum Gauge is bummed, because our “Official Tequila Sponsor” is actually just diesel fuel spiked with Windex.

november 04-10, 2009

RAMMING SPEED Sunday • Blue Rock Tavern If the recent success of bands like Municipal Waste is any indication, Thrash Metal is back with a vengeance. With everyone from metalheads to Hardcore fans and punks wearing flip-up hats, Thrash Metal isn’t just experiencing a revival: It’s undergoing a renaissance. That is just one of the reasons why Boston’s Ramming Speed, with their incredible live shows and mind-blowing guitar work, are poised to become the next band scrawled on the denim vests of thrashers all over the world. And given a recent world tour that included shows in Iceland, France and Sweden and festivals in Germany and Eastern Europe, that could become a reality sooner than you think. At the band’s first show in Cincinnati, I couldn’t help but drag my nearly 30-year-old ass into the mosh pit. These guys have a pretty good sense of humor, too, as illustrated by band shirts with things like “Top of the Dude Chain” and “…And Then We Drank Beer, and It Was AWESOME” emblazoned on the backs. But while their lyrics cover the typical “Party Thrash” like pizza and beer, Ramming Speed is surprisingly politically conscious. Most bands that play this style limit political statements to hypocritical TV evangelists and Christianity, but Ramming Speed covers issues ranging from xenophobia to the affects of terrorism on Americans’ mindsets and political apathy within the Metal scene. This shouldn’t come as much of a surprise, though, as the band members boast influences ranging from Crust Punk to such politically-charged Grindcore bands as Napalm Death and Terrorizer. You’d do well to check these guys out now, before you end up having to pay $30 to see them on tour with some well-known band at a larger venue. And considering this show is free, well, what do you have to lose? (Timothy “Treebeard” Adams)

Buskers Get the Axe We are convinced that sometime in the near future, everything will be corporate sponsored. Streets, rivers, babies, foreheads, sprained ankles, love letters, politicians (oh wait, that happened decades ago) — every activity, person and square inch of public space will one day be labeled with a “Brought to you by the fine people at …” So it’s not a huge shock that companies are now looking at street musicians as a way to spread their corporate brand. The New York Times recently ran an article about the company behind Axe body spray’s unconventional sponsorship plan. The corporation reportedly sought out buskers and local bands via Web ads in an effort to sign up artists who might have integrity, but also probably have pathetic bank account balances. The musicians are not only asked to perform with an “Axe Instinct” (a leatherscented deodorant!) sign in close proximity, but they are also instructed to perform — “a few times a day” — the song “Look Good in Leather” (used in the company’s commercials for the product) and hand out deodorant samples. All for about $1,000. And we thought playing in a cover band was low.

november 04-10, 2009

BIG PICTURE BY STEVE ROSEN

CAM Sets New Date For Imperishable Beauty

CONTACT STEVE ROSEN: srosen@citybeat.com

Visual Evolution

UC exhibition celebrates the work of Charles Darwin 4review by tamera lenz muente

rtists are a lot like scientists: They observe and collect, question and describe, experiment and record. They interpret what they’ve gathered, creating solutions to problems or theories that pose more questions — in physical, visual form. This concept was the impetus for the current exhibition Form from Form: Art from Discovery at the University of Cincinnati’s Phillip M. Meyers, Jr. Memorial Gallery. The eightartist show is fabulous and thought-provoking. The show is part of UC’s larger celebration of the 150th anniversary of the publication of Charles Darwin’s On the Origin of Species, which revolutionized the way the world sees nature and, in turn, humankind itself. The show’s curator, Mary Heider, writes in her description of the exhibition, “As Darwin studied variations in natural forms, so do artists strive to explore change … that provides alternative perspectives on forms, including those in nature.” A couple of the works in the show approach the PHOTO courtesy university of cincinnati subject literally. Steve Geddes Thomas Towhey’s “Essences of the Man” has carved a wooden bust of Darwin ensconced in orchids, and Thomas Towhey’s painting “Essences of the Man” piece, “God and Darwin Resolve the Conflict,” depicts Darwin surrounded by the accoutrecombines drawing and collage to explore the ments of his life’s work, intersections of religious and scientific thought WASSUP such as birds, orchids, like a flowchart of intelligent design and evoluworms and amorphous Form From Form opens Friday from tion. Rhonda Gushee presents what she calls creatures that appear 5-8 p.m. at the University of Cincinnati’s “could-be monstrosities” — ceramic sculptures to be in the middle of portraying infant heads juxtaposed upon Philip M. Meyers, Jr. Memorial Gallery, transformation. It’s nice organic forms like barnacles and leaves, hybrids that in the Steger Student Life Center. The to see the famous naturalist’s represent shifts in future evolutionary processes. show runs through Nov. 23. Gallery face amidst the other artists’ Ana England’s eight-piece ceramic installation covhours are 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Mondaymore conceptual responses ers a wall with gracefully curving forms influenced by to Darwin’s work. Friday. For more information, call segmented antennae. They generate a life of their own, And what wonderful 513-556-3088. enlarged and isolated from the insects’ bodies. In her responses they are. Another artist statement, England writes, “Darwin considered work by Geddes shows the morphology to be the ‘very soul’ of natural selection. evolution of a dinosaur into a bird through 10 wood-carved sculptures. Gary Gaffney’s CONTINUES ON PAGE 454

november 04-10, 2009

Hopefully, by the time you read this – or shortly thereafter – the Cincinnati Art Museum will have opened Imperishable Beauty: Art Nouveau Jewelry, the twice-delayed exhibition of over 100 turn-of-20th-Century pieces from the finest American and European designers and jewelers. On Nov. 3, Director Aaron Betsky said it would open “by the 18th.” This is a touring exhibition organized by Boston’s Museum of Fine Arts from a private collection. Cincinnati is the only venue, besides Boston, to present it, and it hasn’t been on display since it closed there almost a full year ago. As you can see, people are being very careful with displaying it, given the value and fragility of the precious objects. The show was supposed to open here first on Oct. 24 and then Oct. 31. But it has been delayed twice, highly unusual, as the museum struggles to get the “proper environmental conditions” for the display, according to a press release it issued last week. This week a spokesperson for Boston’s MFA said that “installation will resume when the galleries are prepared and meet conservation standards needed for the works of art. Everyone wants it to open.” In a telephone interview last week, Betsky explained the complications, leaving some of it vague because of securityrelated issues. Imperishable Beauty is poised to be a crowd-pleaser, given the interest in such beautiful and precious objects. Roaring Tigers, Leaping Carp: Decoding the Symbolic Language of Chinese Animal Painting, opened Oct. 9 in the museum’s primary 10,000-square-foot temporary-exhibitions gallery. Imperishable Beauty was assigned to a smaller nearby gallery, across the Great Hall, where the recent Bessie Potter Vonnoh sculpture show was held. But size isn’t everything. The museum’s exhibitions staff set out to make the installation worthy, of an exhibit that includes, for instance, a 1904 dragonfly pendant brooch of platinum, gold, enamel, diamond, ruby and pearls. Betsky said the installation design features a long spine-like Plexiglass case running down the middle of the gallery, with individual wall cases also being used. The exterior of the cases were painted blue. “It was the painting of the cases that was the initial issue,” Betsky says. Simply put, it took that paint longer to settle down (become chemically inert) than the original schedule allowed. “It’s dry,” Betsky says. “It was a question of reaching a certain state. It has to be no longer off-gassing. When you walk into a room and it smells like it’s been painted, even though the paint is dry, what you’re smelling is the off-gassing of paint. You have to be very careful of that because this particular art is more delicate than most.” But the paint issue was settled in time for the Oct. 31 opening, Betsky says. Then new problems emerged because the supervising Boston installers wanted some physical changes in the actual cases. “There were various adjustments they wanted to the way mounts were made, the way cases were going to be sealed, even the way screws were placed,” he says. “These all sound very minor, but to people who really care about the correct environment for these pieces, they were very crucial. We understood their concerns.” As of now, Imperishable Beauty is still scheduled to close on Jan. 17. Meanwhile, the museum has augmented the exhibition with related material from its own collection. This is already on display, outside the gallery in the balcony area overlooking the Great Hall.

ARTS

4calendar listings

4onstage

Joy to Sadness

To be included: Submit information for CityBeat calendar listings in writing by noon Wednesday, seven days before publication. Mail to: Maija Zummo, Listings Editor, CityBeat, 811 Race St., Fifth Floor, Cincinnati, OH 45202. Phone: 513-665-4700, ext. 145 Fax: 513-665-4369. e-mail calendar@citybeat.com

Doyle’s Three Sisters will challenge audiences

Please include a contact name and daytime phone number. Due to space considerations, we cannot guarantee that all submitted information will make it to print. H is CityBeat staff’s stamp of approval.

4review by rick pender

4art

november 04-10, 2009

hen a director pushes boundaries, great things can happen. That’s certainly what John Doyle’s staging of Three Sisters has tried to do. A high-profile venture for the Cincinnati Playhouse’s 50th anniversary, Doyle’s production uses a new, very colloquial version of Anton Chekhov’s play by the much-admired writer Sarah Ruhl and a team of Tony Award winners and nominees. Doyle has made a name for himself with musicals, including the 2006 revival of Stephen Sondheim’s Company at the Cincinnati Playhouse, which moved to Broadway and won a Tony. The cast For his first non-musical in the U.S., Doyle has made Chekhov’s classic play of ennui and frustration into something wholly new. There’s much to praise about this production, but I’m guessing most audiences will react to it with ennui and frustration. We don’t see much Chekhov locally (although Cincinnati Shakespeare has recently presented The Cherry Orchard and The Seagull), so our eyes and ears are not readily attuned to the welter of characters, emotions, opinions and attitudes. Doyle’s production helps us sort the discontent felt by the sisters, fretful Olga (Alma Cuervo), unhappy Masha (Laila Robins) and idealistic Irina (Hannah Cabell), transported by their father’s military career to a rural Russian town, bereft of culture and stimulation. Although father has died, they’re still mired in a community they yearn to leave behind for the attractions of Moscow. We especially follow Irina’s arc from inexplicable joy in Act I to palpable sadness at play’s end. Doyle moves her about the stage (subtly highlighted by a follow-spot) and her lines, conceived as part of larger conversations, are more often delivered directly to the audience, as if they are her thoughts. Cabell’s warm vocal delivery and piercing eyes make her a compelling focus. The stage she wanders, designed by Scott Pask (one of those Tony winners), will catch audiences’ attention the moment they enter the Marx Theatre. It’s a deteriorated, late 19th-century ballroom where plaster cornices have fallen to the warped parquet floor and a century of neglect has left it in sad condition. At some earlier time, it became an office — cheap fluorescent lights were hung and a few pieces of worn office furniture remain — but its purpose has long been forgotten and the room is strewn with trash.

Openings Aisle Gallery — Pairs Well With: Recent Objects and Installations

H by Matt Morris is a multimedia solo exhibition in response to nature and idiosyncrasies of Aisle Gallery’s space. Opening reception: 7-10 p.m. Nov. 6.

1-4 p.m. Monday-Friday. Through Dec. 31. 424 Findlay St., Third Floor, Over-theRhine, 513-241-3403.

CS13 — The Text Show features the work of ten artists and poets focusing

on the potential for language to serve as an artistic form. 1-4 p.m. Sundays. Through Nov. 15. Closing reception. 1219 Sycamore St., Over-the-Rhine, contemporaryspace13@gmail.com.

NVISION — Julie Lonneman and Saad Ghosn exhibit their prints. Julie exhibits An Artist’s Eye on Knowlton Street, a collection of prints communicates her fascination with this area of Northside. Ghosn exhibits his print collections in The Observer and Animalia. In The Observer, view nine woodcut prints that reminds us not to be passive observers. In Animalia, see 10 prints of chimeric animals. Opening reception: 6-10 p.m. Nov. 6. 2-9 p.m. Wednesday-Sunday. Through Dec. 6. 4577 Hamilton Ave., Northside, 513-542-4577.

PHOTO courtesy playhouse in the park

of Three Sisters Doyle keeps his entire cast onstage, wearing tattered garments from mid-20th century Russia, including Soviet-era uniforms for the military characters. (Costumes were designed by Tony winner Ann Hould-Ward.) What’s worn often helps to define characters: Boorish sister-in-law Natasha (Sarah Agnew) wears a garish 1950s cocktail dress with too many petticoats and odd color choices; Baron Tuzenbach (Tony winner Frank Wood), Irina’s constantly rejected suitor, is dressed in shopworn top hat and tails; other characters’ garments might be flung on the floor to become a bed. Doyle’s concept forces audiences to work at understanding many moments. Why does a non-speaking maid (Kelly Pekar) dressed in a military uniform hand out props and periodically ring a bell as characters come and go? What does it mean that Irina lays a rose on her father’s grave (a piece of fallen plaster), when later Natasha wanders the room at the conclusion holding it, then flinging it away? These choices have meaning, to be sure, but they are neither obvious nor resonant. Doyle has staged musicals in which actors double as musicians, making the story more abstract. Another kind of distancing is at work in Three Sisters; these wonderful veteran actors are “interpreting” Chekhov’s play. You might be fascinated by the insights Doyle’s production offers, but if you don’t know the play well, you’re likely to leave scratching your head. THREE SISTERS, presented by the Cincinnati Playhouse in the Park, continues through Nov. 21.

Museums Cincinnati Art Museum — Roaring Tigers, Leaping Carp: Decoding H the Symbolic Language of Chinese Animal Painting is a ground-breaking exhibition featuring approximately 100 Chinese paintings and objects depicting animals. $10; free for members. 11 a.m.-5 p.m. Tuesday-Sunday. Through Jan. 3. ... Take a special docent-led tour of the Art in Bloom arrangements. 12:30 and 2 p.m. Nov. 5-6; 1:30 and 3:15 p.m. Nov. 8. ... Evening in Bloom lets you admire the beautiful floral arrangements of Art in Bloom with interpretations from professional designers, hors d’oeuvres, special cocktails and musical entertainment. $100. 6-9 p.m. Nov. 5. 953 Eden Park Drive, Mount Adams, 513-721-2787.

Contemporary Arts Center — Standard Definition is a multiH sensory experience with a multi-channel sound and video installation by artist/musician C. Spencer Yeh in his first solo museum exhibition. $7.50;

$6.50 seniors; $5.50 students. 10 a.m.-9 p.m. Mondays; 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Wednesday-Friday; 11 a.m.-6 p.m. Saturday and Sunday. Through Jan. 24. 44 E. Sixth St., Downtown, 513-345-8400.

4onstage

Row House Gallery — Art Harvest: The Art of Ken Snouffer is an exhibit and sale featuring a minimum of five new paintings per week. Opening reception: 4-7 p.m. Nov. 6. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Monday-Friday; 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Saturday. Through Nov. 30. 211 Main St., Milford, 513-831-7230.

Theater

Semantics Gallery — Touch Faith features an exhibition of abstract works

sequal to Greater Tuna. It’s Christmas in the third smallest town in Texas and stuff is happening. $17. 8 p.m. Nov. 6, 7, 12 13, 14, 19, 20; 7 p.m. Nov. 8; 2 and 7 p.m. Nov. 15; 4 and 8 p.m. Nov. 21; 2 p.m. Nov. 22. Walton Creek Theater, 4101 Walton Creek Road, Mariemont, 513-684-1236.

by a variety of artists and curated by Jeffrey Cortland Jones. Opening reception: 7-11 p.m. Nov. 7. 1107 Harrison Ave., Brighton, 513-207-5262.

Studio San Giuseppe — Selections ‘09 is the 14th biennial exhibit of art works created by talented regional high school students as selected by their art teachers. Opening reception: 2-4:30 p.m. Nov. 8. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. MondayFriday; 1-5 p.m. Saturday and Sunday. Through Dec. 4. 5701 Delhi Road, Delhi Twp., 513-244-4151. U-turn Art Space — Don’t Be Scared Be Prepared features recent

drawings and other solutions on paper and walls by Jessie Bowie. Opening reception: 7-10 p.m. Nov. 7. U-turn Art Space, 2159 Central Ave., Brighton, u.turn.artspace@gmail.com.

Galleries & Exhibits The Architectural Foundation of Cincinnati — The H Architectural Foundation is hosting an exhibition of Frank Lloyd Wright photographs, artifacts and designs associated with the house he created

in West Lafayette, Ind. for Dr. John E. Christian. It is a mature example of a Usonian home. $10. Hours by appointment. Through Nov. 17. The Architectural Foundation of Cincinnati, 127 W. Ninth St. , Downtown, 513-421-4469.

Art Academy of Cincinnati — Hank Willis Thomas is the third

annual Lightborne Artist in Residence. See his photos on display at the Convergys Gallery. 9 a.m.-9 p.m. Monday-Friday. Through Nov. 15. Art Academy of Cincinnati, 1212 Jackson St., Over-the-Rhine, 513-562-6262.

Art Academy of Cincinnati — Built Drawings features 26 sculptures,

drawings, oil paintings and prints that challenge traditional concepts of architecture, habitation and sense of place by George Schmidt. 9 a.m.-9 p.m. Monday-Friday; 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Saturday-Sunday. Through Nov. 15. Art Academy of Cincinnati, 1212 Jackson St., Over-the-Rhine, 513-562-6262.

Betts House — Revisit recent Cincinnati history through this exhibit of

photographs by Sherman Cahal, Craig Moyer and Ronny Salerno in Exploring Cincinnati. The exhibit focuses on the social and economic challenges that Cincinnati’s urban areas have weathered over the fast few decades. $2. 11 a.m.-2 p.m. Tuesday-Thursday. Through Nov. 19. Betts House, 416 Clark St., West End.

A Tuna Christmas — Ed Howard, Joe Sears and Jaston Williams’ hilarious

All’s Well That Ends Well — A breathless chase featuring H some of the cleverest and most manipulative female characters in all of Shakespeare. $20-$26. 7:30 p.m. Thursday-Saturday; 2 p.m. Sundays.

Through Nov. 15. Cincinnati Shakespeare Company, 719 Race St., Downtown, 513-381-2273.

Boom — Jo arrives at what appears to be an underground laboratory after answering a Craigslist ad promising “sex to change the course of the H world.” What she finds is Jules, a marine biologist who has determined that the

world is going to end tonight. $12. 8 p.m. Thursday-Saturday and 3 p.m. Nov. 1. Through Nov. 7 Know Theatre of Cincinnati, 1120 Jackson St., Over-the-Rhine, 513-300-5669.

FAME — SCPA performs this musical set in the last years of New York City’s High School for the Performing Arts on 46th Street. $12.50-$22.50. 7:30 p.m. Nov. 6 and 7. Aronoff Center for the Arts, 650 Walnut St., Downtown, 513-721-3344.

Guys and Dolls — Musical and comedy stories based on the stories of

Damon Runyan. $20.50. 7:30 p.m. Wednesdays-Thursdays; 8 p.m. Fridays and Saturdays; 2:30 p.m. Sunday. Through Nov. 14. Aronoff Center for the Arts, 650 Walnut St., Downtown, 513-721-3344.

One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest — Adapted from Ken Kesey’s novel,

Randle P. McMurphy is charming rogue who contrives to serve a short sentence in an airy mental institution rather in a prison. $21; $19 seniors/students. 8 p.m. Thursday-Saturday; 2 p.m. Sunday; 8 p.m. Nov. 11. Through Nov. 15. Covedale Center for Performing Arts, 4990 Glenway Ave., Covedale, 513-241-6550.

Poe — This spooky special is a one-man show featuring several of the author’s classic stories and poems including The Masque of the Red Death and Anabel Lee. $20; $15 students. 2 p.m. Saturdays; 7:30 p.m. Sundays, Tuesdays and Wednesdays. Cincinnati Shakespeare Company, 719 Race St., Downtown, 513-381-2273.

Country Club — Kingdom of Nature is an exhibition of new and recent

Rhinoceros — Get twisted in the absurdity of Eugene Ionesco’s off-the-wall play. Rhinoceros is described as “where irrational and illogical meet comedic and thought-provoking” when two rhinoceroses are set loose in a small town. Performances will take place in Stauss Theatre. $8-$12. Through Nov. 8. Corbett Theatre (NKU), Fine Arts Center, Nunn Drive, Highland Heights, 859-572-5464.

Know Theatre of Cincinnati — Room Service tells the story of three hotel rooms through the photographs of Deogracias Lerma. 11 a.m.-6 p.m. daily. Through Nov. 20. Know Theatre of Cincinnati, 1120 Jackson St., Over-theRhine, 513-300-5669.

The Three Sisters — The Three Sisters, adapted by Sarah Ruhl, is Anton Chekov’s tale about three sisters tuck in a backwater town, who long to get to Moscow where they imagine their lives will be transformed and fulfilled. $28-$63. 7:30 p.m. Tuesday-Wednesday; 8 p.m. Thursday-Saturday; 4 p.m. Saturday; 2 and 7 p.m. Sunday. Through Nov. 21. Cincinnati Playhouse in the Park, 962 Mt. Adams Circle, Mount Adams, 513-421-3888.

paintings and works on paper by L.A.-based artist Aaron Morse. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Monday-Saturday. Through Dec. 19. Country Club, 3209 Madison Road ,Second Floor Oakley, 513-792-9744.

Philip M. Meyers, Jr. Memorial Gallery — Form from Form: Art from Discovery features the new creations of seven noted living H artists (all doing new Darwin-inspired works). Noon-5 p.m. Monday-Friday;

noon-4 p.m. Saturday. Through Nov. 23. Philip M. Meyers, Jr. Memorial Gallery, Steger Student Life Center, Room 465,University of Cincinnati campus Clifton, 513-556-3088.

Carl Solway Gallery — Walls, Floors & Ceilings features largeH scale installations by 16 artists from across the country. Free. 9 a.m.-5 p.m. Monday-Friday; noon-5 p.m. Saturday. Through Dec. 23. Carl Solway Gallery, 424 Findlay St., Over-the-Rhine, 513-621-0069.

Weston Art Gallery — “I’ll Just Ask Dad” features low-tech instal-

H lations by Ryan Mulligan inspired by dark comedy and the mythology of his everyday life. ...Form as a Cognitive System features whimsical frescoes by

New Mexican artist Michael Sharber. Free. ... Virtue in the Struggle features an installation and works on paper by Casey Riordan Millard motivated by fear, anger and despair. 10 a.m.-5:30 p.m. Tuesday-Saturday; noon-5 p.m. Sunday. Through Dec. 6. Weston Art Gallery, 650 Walnut St., Downtown, 513-977-4165.

H H

Vacancy — This interactive murder mystery introduces zany characters, each one with something to hide. $14; $12 seniors/children. 8 p.m. Sept. 18, 19, 25, 26 and Nov. 6 and 7. Monmouth Theater, 636 Monmouth St., Newport, 859-655-9140.

Classical Music Xavier Classical Guitar Series — This month, check out guitarist Jason Vieaux, who has earned a devoted following at home and abroad, playing more than 100 engagements over the last two seasons with orchestras from Poland to Brazil. $12. $9 for seniors, $3 for students. 2:30 p.m. Nov. 8. Xavier University Gallagher Student Center, 3800 Victory Pkwy., Evanston, 513-745-3161.

Comedy Tracy Morgan CANCELLED — This show has been cancelled. 8 p.m. HNov. 7. Taft Theatre, 317 E. Fifth St., Downtown, 513-721-8833.

funny bone on the levee— As a cast member of Saturday Night Live, Kevin Nealon is most recognized for the characters he created, including; “The Subliminal Man,” “Hans and Franz,” and anchoring “Weekend Update.” $25. 8 and 10:15 p.m. Friday; 7:30 and 10 p.m. Saturday. Funny Bone on the Levee, One Levee Way ,Suite 3124 Newport, 859-957-2000. ... Rajiv Satyal is the small, bespectacled Indian guy from Ohio whose witty, universal, and TV-clean act resonates with Middle America by covering everything from racial issues to soap bottles to his favorite topic &#150; himself. $10. 8 p.m. Thursday and 7:30 p.m. Sunday. Funny Bone on the Levee, One Levee Way ,Suite 3124 Newport, 859-957-2000.

Nick Thune and Bill Squire — Nick Thune is comedian/actor/writer/

bird owner from Seattle. Bill Squire, ex-Mormon and comedian, will be the feature act. $8-$12. 8 p.m. Thursday-Sunday; 10:30 p.m. Friday and Saturday. Go Bananas Comedy Club, 8410 Market Place Lane, Blue Ash, 513-984-9288.

Vocal Arts Vocal Arts Ensemble — The Vocal Arts Ensemble performs Cantos

Sagrados, an emotional journey told by mothers of the disappearing sons of Latin America. $20; $10 students. 8 p.m. Nov. 6. St. Peter in Chains Cathedral, 325 W. Eighth St., Downtown, 513-421-5354.

4events

Diet, discusses “Eating for a Cool Planet,” making connections between our culture, food and the source of our broad range of problems. 6:30-8 p.m. Nov. 4. Park + Vine, 1109 Vine St., Over-the-Rhine, 513-721-7275.

Guy Jones — In honor of Native American month, Xavier University

presents Guy Jones’ lecture, “Beyond Being Indian.” Join Jones as he discusses Native Americans in a historical way you’ll never read in an American textbook. Free 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. Nov. 10. Xavier University Gallagher Student Center, 3800 Victory Pkwy., Evanston, 513-745-4889.

National Gender-Based Violence Conference — The keynote presentation will be “The Politics of Gender Violence” by Madelaine Adelman, PhD of Arizona State University. Adelman is associate professor in the School of Justice and Social Inquiry. There will also be various workshops throughout the day. Free. 8:30 a.m.-4 p.m. Nov. 9. Xavier University, 3800 Victory Parkway, Evanston, 513-745-3000.

Thin Air Studio — Christopher Daniel and Kirk Mayhew, the sculptors who collaborate as Thin Air Studio, will speak about their work, including the permanent installation at Iris, “Tidal.” 2 p.m. Nov. 8. Iris Bookcafe, 1331 Main St., Over-the-Rhine, 513-381-2665.

4literary Readings, Signings & Events

Art in Bloom — Art in Bloom features nearly 100 floral arrangements H made by amateur and professional designers and inspired by art in the permanent collection. 11 a.m.-5 p.m. daily. Through Nov. 8. Cincinnati Art

Michael Banks — Author of Before Oprah: Ruth Lyons The Woman Who Created Talk TV, Michael Banks will be discussing and signing his new book. 2 p.m. Nov. 7 Cincinnati Public Library, Main Branch, 800 Vine St., Downtown, 513-369-6900.

Cincinnati Comic and Anime Convention — Head down to the HRadisson for comic books, anime, DVDs, toys, action figures, Star Wars stuff, autographs, special guests like David Mack, Tony Moore and Mark Kidwell,

Michael Berenstain — Author/illustrator of Berenstain Bears

Clifton Cultural Arts Center Lighting Ceremony — A lighting

Marty Brennaman — This Hall-of-Famer and longtime voice of the Cincinnati Reds is the next By the Books speaker, talking about the books that informed, inspired and influenced him. $15 members; $18 others. 11:30 a.m. Nov. 5. The Phoenix, 812 Race St., Downtown, 513-621-0717.

Museum, 953 Eden Park Drive, Mount Adams, 513-721-2787.

and more. $5. 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Nov. 7 and 11 a.m.-4 p.m. Nov. 8. Radisson Hotel Cincinnati Riverfront, 668 W. Fifth St. , Covington, 859-491-1200.

ceremony to celebrate the 1906 Clifton School Building’s new lighting will happen for the public to witness after Mrs. Joan Strader flips the official switch. Trombones will provide the soundtrack for the event. Following the lighting, several canvases featured at the Streetscapes Festival will be auctioned off. Don’t miss your chance to witness this historic occasion. Free. 5-8 p.m. Nov. 6. Clifton Cultural Arts Center , 3711 Clifton Ave., Clifton, 513-497-2860.

Fall Constellation Show — Navigate your way through the night sky as

experts point out the legends and myths that make up our modern day constellations. $3. 1-2 p.m. Nov. 7. Trailside Nature Center, 3251 Brookline Drive, Clifton, Call 513-751-3679 to make reservations.

Royal Hanneford Circus — The Royal Hanneford Circus, which has built a reputation since 1807 of producing quality family entertainment, will entertain the young and old. $8.50-$38. 7:30 p.m. Nov. 6; 11 a.m., 3 p.m. and 7:30 p.m. Nov. 7; 3 p.m. Nov. 8. The Bank of Kentucky Center, 500 N. Nunn Drive,,Northern Kentucky University Highland Heights, 513-562-4949.

4lectures Berlin Wall Conference — Exactly 20 years ago, the fall of the Berlin

Wall made history as it united Germany into a single entity. In honor of the anniversary, the University of Cincinnati is holding a two-day conference entitled, “November 9, 1989: The Fall of the Berlin Wall, Twenty Years After.” Keynote speakers will address the effects of the fall of the wall from several different aspects. Free.11:45 a.m.-9:30 p.m. Nov. 8; 9 a.m.-7 p.m. Nov. 9. Tangeman University Center, 2624 Clifton Ave., Clifton, 513-556-0502.

Eating for a Cooler Planet — Will Tuttle, author of The World Peace

Michael Berenstain will be signing the Living Lights series. Kids can also watch him demonstrate how to draw the characters and get free copies of the faith-based books 6 - 8 p.m. Nov. 10. Joseph-Beth Booksellers, 2692 Madison Road, Norwood, 513-396-8960.

Craig Holden — Author Craig Holden will be discussing and signing

The Jazz Bird, a real-life saga of guns, bribes, murder and betrayal set in a 1920s Cincinnati. Holden describes the lifestyle and corruption of the infamous bootlegger George Remus and his wife Imogene. 7 p.m. Nov. 10 Kenton County Public Library, Erlanger Branch, 401 Kenton Lands Road, Erlanger, 859-962-4000.

4sports Spectator Cincinnati Bearcats — The Bearcats host UConn for a football contest. $42-$56. 1 p.m. Nov. 7. Nippert Stadium, 2624 Clifton Avenue, Clifton, 513-556-2287.

Cincinnati Bengals — Bengals host division rivals. $64-$82. H 1 p.m. Nov. 8 Cincinnati Bengals at Paul Brown Stadium, One Paul Brown Stadium, , 513-455-4800. Cincinnati Cyclones — ECHL homeboys set some bait for Toledo. $12-$24.50. 7:30 p.m. Nov. 6. ... ECHL homeboys dump a flood of goals on Johnstown. $12-$24.50. 7:30 p.m. Nov. 5. US Bank Arena, 100 Broadway, Downtown, 513-421-4111.

more listings at citybeat.com Find information on classes, volunteer opportunities and ongoing area attractions in our searchable listings online

4VISUAL EVOLUTION: FROM PAGE 43

november 04-10, 2009

For me, it is the mysterious heart of connection.” Anthony Becker explores not-so-natural selection in “Death Toll 2009,” floating files that hold the records of birds Becker has found killed by automobiles. Becker sketches each bird, documents each species and files the drawings under the day he recorded them. Viewers can pore through the files, discovering that some days contain no drawings, while others contain as many as three or more. It’s a tragic display that reminds us of the human intrusion into the workings of nature. Lisa Merida-Paytes’ “Spine Series” appears at first elegant and lovely, but carries a subversive edge. Influenced by her childhood among her father’s taxidermy and slaughterhouse business, these wire and ceramic wall sculptures are disturbing yet strangely beauti-

ful. They echo so many natural forms, from the networks of dendrites in the nervous system, to flayed skin and empty, hanging carcasses. Ink paintings by the late January Marx Knoop inspired Heider to curate Form from Form. When painting, Knoop allowed ink to bleed through to a sheet of paper beneath it, creating his next drawing based on the remnants of the one before it. The result was the extraordinary 100-piece series “Metamorphosis,” which is represented by a selection of framed works with the last 50 works looped on a video monitor, revealing the transformations between paintings. “This series makes your mind work through new possibilities for ‘what is,’ ” Heider says. Knoop’s work may have provided the seed for the exhibition, but in its entirety the show offers an exploration of evolution driven by imagination. ©

4arts

News to You Comedian Kevin Nealon’s act gets more personal 4INTERVIEW BY P.F. WILSON

november 04-10, 2009

here’s been a lot of talk lately about the legalization of marijuana. Should it just be decriminalized, used only for medicinal purposes or made completely legal? If it’s the latter, what happens to the Showtime series Weeds? “That’s a good question,” says Kevin Nealon, one of that program’s stars. “I guess it’ll be a show about cigarettes.” In addition to Weeds, the 55-year-old comedian/actor is probably most widely known for his work on Saturday Night Live, where he anchored the “Weekend Update” segment for so many years. While he skillfully parodied current events on that program, these days his outlook is more domestic, and that’s reflected in his standup set. “A lot of it is based on truth for the most part,” he says while running errands in Los Angeles. “That’s what I’ve been going for these last few years. Sort of changing from my silly stand-up outlook to more of a personal outlook on things. Kind of a reflection of my own life.” Back in 2005, Nealon married actress Susan Yeagley. In 2007, the couple welcomed their first child, son Gable. Parenthood has had quite an effect on Nealon. “It’s unlike anything I’ve ever experienced before,” he says. “It’s so brutally difficult at times, but the pay-off is so immense that I wouldn’t trade it for anything. I can see why people would want to be a stay-athome dad. Such a great job.” Indeed, the biggest challenge has been getting out of the fast-paced showbiz mindset. “Now I pick up the phone and my son is like ‘No phone, no phone’ when we’re playing,” Nealon says. Nealon never expected to be on SNL. He had taken acting classes while doing stand-up in Los Angeles, but he didn’t do any characters or impressions, something of a perquisite for potential cast members. “There were two other guys up for (SNL) when I was up for it,” he recalls. “(It was for) the last spot on the show and it was between Kevin Pollak, Jim Carrey and myself. I heard they already had enough impressionists on the show and they wanted someone like me, I guess. That was odd the way I got that.” In fact, it was close friend (and adept impressionist) Dana Carvey who originally recommended Nealon. In that same spirit of helping others, Nealon is also paying it forward, having befriended a young comic named Rajiv Satyal, who hails from Fairfield, Ohio. Satyal, who has lived in L.A. for the past

PHOTO courtesy showtime

Kevin Nealon few years, will headline Thursday and Sunday at The Funny Bone, and he’ll perform with Nealon Friday and Saturday. The two struck up a friendship a few years back when Nealon was playing the Funny Bone on the Levee. “Jeff Jena, who was booking the Funny Bone, liked me,” Satyal says, “and (asked) ‘Do you want to work with Nealon?’ Who wouldn’t?” After the show, at the behest of his buddies, Rajiv invited Nealon to join them at the movies. Nealon agreed. “During the course of the weekend we grabbed dinner, coffee — further than I get with most women in six months really,” Satyal says with a laugh. “I was telling (Kevin) I was reading his book and he goes, ‘You know whose house I was at last night?’ He’s not a name-dropper, he’s not that kind of person at all, but he said, ‘I was at Steve Martin’s house.’ You could see Kevin speak so admiringly of Steve Martin, and it was so funny to see yourself on a rung and you’re looking up at Nealon, and he’s looking up at Steve Martin.” “I went over to his (parents’) house last time and had dinner with his family,” says Nealon of his protégé “Got a nice traditional Indian meal. He’s a funny guy.” KEVIN NEALON performs at Funny Bone on the Levee at 8 and 10:15 p.m. Friday and 7:30 and 10 p.m. Saturday.

DINER

THE DISH By HEATHER SMITH

November Is For Foodies

CONTACT heather smith: hsmith@citybeat.com

PHOTO: cameron knight

InCahoots, Out of Sorts Pleasant service can’t make up for sub-par entreés 4review by heather smith

here are people who own restaurants in Cincinnati who are so phenomenal with detail that they actually coordinate the linen napkins to the color of your clothes. If you’re wearing something dark, the napkin is black; something light, it’s white. And there are restaurants like this that aren’t any more expensive than InCahoots, which reopened in a new Blue Ash location this summer. At InCahoots, entrée prices average $16, unless you order a sandwich ($8). So maybe INCAHOOTS that’s why we were so surprised by our Go: 4110 Hunt Road, Blue Ash Call: 513-793-2600 experience. First, we Hours: 11 a.m.-midnight Monday-Thursday; 11a.m.were seated at a table 1 a.m. Friday and Saturday; 4-10 p.m. Sunday. in the middle of the Entrée Prices: $10-$20 bar right next to the Payment: Major credit cards pool table. By the soft Red Meat Alternatives: Several vegetarian options florescent glow of Accessibility: Fully accessible the Miller pool table light, we perused our menus and surveyed the scene. At the bar were a few retired frat boys and, at 6:30 p.m. on a Friday, a lot of people who looked like they’d just gotten off work from one of the nearby office parks. They looked tired and grateful for a beer. “It’s definitely a sensible shoe crowd,” my dining

partner keenly observed. Which was fine with us. At first we were excited by the eclectic menu, which could best be described as multi-ethnic bar food. Some of the appetizers and entrées sounded delectable. Take, for instance, the Portuguese Shrimp Empanadas ($9), shrimp morsels in a rich creamy sauce rolled in homemade pastry. Or the Portabella Tempura with Crab Dip ($7), the special for the night. We ordered both, as well as two drinks we were told were some of the best in house — the special, an Apple Martini ($4), and a Bellini ($5). They came out quickly (the service was excellent). Along with this came complimentary bruschetta. The tomatoes were pale and mealy, there was only one tiny shred of basil and it came in a tiny white bowl in the middle of a large pale plate with some bread haphazardly tossed on it like an afterthought. And, no, it wasn’t beautiful on the inside. Meanwhile, our drinks arrived. Looking at my friend’s Bellini, I was confused. Why wasn’t it peach? Instead, it was clear except for a dash of pink sparkle. After tasting it, my companion realized why: “It’s peach schnapps” “I’ve never had peach schnapps in a Bellini,” she added diplomatically and a bit forced. She only had CONTINUES ON PAGE 494

november 04-10, 2009

Your first November foodie fling should be Park + Vine’s “Vegan Love Fest” Dinner Party on Wednesday, Nov. 11, from 6-8 p.m. Get vegan Thanksgiving inspiration from local restaurants and food purveyors including Five Star Foodies, Lavomatic, Loving Cafe, Lucky John Market, Melt, Myra’s Dionysus, Naturally Yours, Tucker’s Restaurant and World Peace Jubilee. Registration is $11. Proceeds benefit Live Green Planet Eco Garden Project in Over-the-Rhine. RSVP to info@ parkandvine.com or 513-721-7275 before Nov. 10. If you’re looking for even more vegan love, check out Park + Vine’s Traditional Vegan Thanksgiving with Chef Mark Stroud on Nov. 14 from 11 a.m.-1 p.m. Registration is $36. RSVP to anna@ worldpeaceyoga.com before Nov. 12. Next, you won’t want to miss Nectar Restaurant’s Pumpkin, Savory and Sweet dinner on Nov. 19. At local organic Turner’s Farm, feast on pumpkins like the Connecticut Field, one of the oldest varieties of pumpkins of Native American origin, as well as winter squashes like Delicata and Acorn. Price per person is $55. Dinner starts at 7 p.m. Reservations required. Call 513-929-0525. The last stop on your whirlwind November food tour should be World Food Bar’s “Thanksbrewing” on Saturday, Nov. 21, from 7-10 p.m. The hors d’oeuvres alone include Duck Confit Nachos, Truffled Parmesan Pop Corn, Mereguez Sausage Corn Dog with Beer Cheese and the Wild Mushroom Quesadilla (the veggie option). The price is $55 and includes all food and beer pairings. Vegan and vegetarian options are available. The location of the dinner club is kept secret until the day of the event. For reservations, contact Micah Paldino at 513-381-7676 or e-mail at micah@worldfoodbar.com. If you like to cook and drink as much as you like to eat, you’ll also want to check out the EQ classes and wine tastings at the Party Source cooking school. This Saturday offers “You Ain’t NEVER Heard of This Grape!” a clearly unpretentious wine tasting from 1-3 p.m. Cost is $20 and includes a $5 gift card. Later that night, you can enjoy “Great Beef – No Bull!” from 6-8 p.m. Cost is $60. Learn everything you wanted to know about beef and enjoy New York Strip with Blue Cheese and Herb Crust, Beef Tenderloin with Red Wine Shallot Sauce and Spicy Cumin Beef Stir Fry, among others. If you’re still in the mood to eat later that week, consider A Taste of PHOTO BY: thomas smith World Food Bar on Monday with Chef Josh Campbell. Enjoy Chilled Cauliflower Gazpacho with Grilled Bread, Smoked Onion Marmalade and Jerez Reduction Sous Vide of Kobe Beef with Butternut Squash Crème Brûlée and Asparagus and Au Jus. Cost is $60. For other November EQ events and times, visit thepartysource.com. Reserve a spot by calling 859-655-3635.

4RESTAURANT PICKS Compiled from CityBeat’s 2009 Where to Eat Dining Guide plus recent restaurant reviews, these capsules are listed by area of town. Menues and times are subject to change. “Best of Cincinnati” readers pick winners are listed, as are review dates and reviewers’ initials if applicable. Contact Maija Zummo at CityBeat, 811 Race St., Fifth Floor, Cincinnati, OH 45202. Phone: 513-665-4700. Fax: 513-665-4369. Check out the searchable Dining Guide online at citybeat.com and the restaurant section of our “Best of Cincinnanti” Web site at bestofcincinnati.com.com

North Cincinnati’s Only True East Coast Style Bar & Eatery

Every Friday

Ladies Night daNce Party dJ JohNNy B

with

starts @ 9:30pm

$3 Mixed drinks & Bombs & $4 Wine

We have the

NFL ticket

with 50¢ Wings & $2 domestic Bottle

on sundays & Mondays sun-Wed 11a-12a | thu-sat 11a-2a

We serve food late night up to closing time.

november 04-10, 2009

2038 MadisoN rd • oBryoNviLLe 513-321-4711 • Fax: 513-321-4733

Carlo & Johnny — The emphasis at this “1930s gangster steakhouse”

is on big dry-aged steaks, but the menu also presents dry-aged lamb chops, wood-grilled Atlantic salmon and more. After say, a bone-in filet or a large steak for two, don’t forget dessert — they’re as decadent as everything else in the place and range from Jeff Ruby’s homemade signature cheesecake to the rich, dense Chocolate Tower. The three separate dining rooms — the Emerald, the Ivory and the Grill — are great places to see local celebs and Cincinnati movers and shakers. Entrees: $21-$47. 5:30-10 p.m. MondayThursday; 5:30-11 p.m. Friday; 5-11 p.m. Saturday. 9769 Montgomery Road, Montgomery, 513-936-8600.

Central Cactus Pear — Cactus Pear offers consistently good Tex-Mex cuisine

and service, great outdoor dining and some of the strongest Margaritas and Mojitos known to humankind. But when we say Tex-Mex, we’re not talking vegetable and steak fajitas and chili con queso. Oh, no. At the Pear, you’ll find original takes on classics, like Spinach Queso with jack cheese and herbs and Caribbean Fajitas with jerk BBQ chicken, sweet potatoes, zucchini and pineapple salsa. Everything comes together — great food, strong drinks, reasonable prices, fast, friendly service and an atmosphere where you can chat. They also have a location in Blue Ash (HS 8-05-09). Entrees: $7.95-$18.95. 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Monday-Thursday; 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Friday; 5-11 p.m. Saturday; 5-10 p.m. Sunday. 3215 Jefferson Ave., Clifton, 513-961-7400.

Camp Washington Chili — John Johnson, the patriarch of Camp

Washington Chili, won’t divulge the ingredients in his secret spice mix, but he will say that the secret to his success is that he doesn’t use any imitation ingredients. Unlike many of the chili chains, Johnson never freezes the meat he uses, which he’s been buying from the local slaughterhouses since he started his business. He also uses fresh onions, fresh garlic and Wisconsin cheddar cheese. The retro-style dining room is open 24 hours a day, and the customers are as varied as the different ways they order their chili. Winner of “Best Chili (Non-Chain).” Entrees: $5-$8. Open 24/7 Monday-Saturday. 3005 Colerain Ave. , Camp Washington, 513-541-0061.

Christy’s/Lenhardt’s — Christy’s/Lenhardt’s is a piece of Cincinnati history. Housed in the once-regal surroundings of the former Moerlein mansion, it now provides a comfortable spot to indulge in some culinary local

history. The menu includes typical German fare such as Pork Schniztel, Sauerbraten and Potato pancake and Homemade Sausage with sauerkraut as well as Eastern European dishes such as Chicken Paprikasch and Hungarian Goulash. Along with a cozy dining room to get your schnitzel fix, visit the outdoor Biergarten and the Rathskeller. The basement Rathskeller mimics the feel of an old-style German pub; both spots offer German favorites like Warsteiner. Entrees: $8-$12. 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Monday-Friday; 10:30 am.-11 p.m. Saturday; 10:30 a.m.-9:30 p.m. Sunday. 151 W. McMillan St., Clifton Heights, 513-281-3600.

Cilantro Vietnamese Bistro — Healthy, affordable and quick Vietnamese

food featuring stir-fried noodles, vermicelli salads and pho soups, all served vegetarian or with shrimp, pork, chicken or beef. It’s feel-good food with plenty of cilantro and lemongrass to soothe the tummy. Not to worry: Fried spring rolls with fiery dipping sauce offer one satisfying guilty pleasure. A small, laid-back diner with good, friendly college vibes and plenty of sizzling action behind the counter. Great for when you’re on the go, but plenty of counter and table seating for dining in. Entrees: $6-$6.50. 10:30 a.m.-9 p.m. Monday-Friday; 4:30-8:30 p.m. Saturday. 2516 Clifton Ave., Clifton Heights, 513-281-1732.

City Barbeque — This regional chain puts out some damn tasty barbeque, including mouth-watering beef brisket and a good and sloppy North Carolina Pulled Pork Sandwich. Don’t neglect your sides- the vinegary greens and crusty hush puppies are stellar. The new Pulled Chicken Sandwich is a yummy addition to the fare. Play with your food. City BBQ offers three sauces to mix and match- vinegarand onion-based Carolina sauce, an original tomato-based sauce and mustard sauce. Entrees: $6-$19. 10:30 a.m.-10 p.m. Monday-Saturday; 10:30 a.m.-9 p.m. Sunday. 3804 Paxton Ave., Multiple Locations, 513-871-8890. City View Tavern — Still the best view and some of the tastiest burgers in

town, and the prices are from back in the day when Mount Adams was known as a “bohemian” neighborhood with just regular folks. Try City View’s Bloody Mary — it repeatedly wins awards as the city’s finest and hairiest. Stella Artois is among the beers newly added available at the bar. Laid back and genuine, City View has managed to rise above the hype and stay real for generations. Good jukebox, cold beer, friendly folks. One note of caution: Unattended children of any age will be dismissed from the premises. Entrees: $3-$7. 4 p.m.-2 a.m. Monday-Thursday; noon-2 a.m. Friday-Saturday. 403 Oregon St., Mount Adams, 513-241-8439.

Currito — Formerly Boloco, Currito serves up “inspired burritos” that draw on culinary influences from around the world. Offerings range from Cajun to Mediterranean to Bangkok as well as salads, chips and salsa and fruit smoothies. Snackers — their own twist on quesadillas — come with cheese and chicken, steak or even tofu. Tired of wrestling with burritos as big as your head? Currito is a smaller

alternative with a sizeable selection. The restaurant also offers healthier choices like brown rice instead of white for burrito fillings as well as organic tofu. Entrees: $6-$10. 11 a.m.- 9 p.m. Monday-Friday; 11 a.m.-8 p.m. Saturday-Sunday. 222 Calhoun St., Clifton, 513-281-1500.

Downtown Cafe de Paris — Offers Parisian cafe food at its finest, focusing on traditionally French lunch and breakfast selections like Salade Nicoise and Croissant Foure aux Epinards (toasted croissant with spinach and feta). Entrees: $3-$8.50. 7:30 a.m.-3:30 p.m. Monday-Friday; 10:30 a.m.-3 p.m. Saturday. 17 Garfield Place, Downtown, 513-651-1919.

Coffee Emporium — Spend your time creating the perfect drink — pick the

type of bean, choose between caffeinated/decaffeinated, add a syrup addition or choose a flavor. The emphasis is on the coffee, but some food is offered, including soup from Myra’s. Walking into this roasting company, take a minute to breathe in the intense, hypnotic coffee scent. The modern downtown store is awash with coffee and tea smells. Scattered seats around the store are available for sitting and chatting, and a bar by the large windows offers refuge for the solo diners. The Hyde Park location is a diminutive Victorian with a quaint wisteria-covered arbor. Winner of “Best Coffeehouse.” Under $10. 110 E. Central Parkway, Downtown, 513-651-5483.

Courtyard Cafe on Main — Serves a step above ordinary bar food, offering

stuffed mushrooms, burritos, double-decker sandwiches, soups and our favorite, the cole slaw. A lunch destination for area workers, it’s also a great place to hang out, eat some grub and drink some beers. As its name suggests, this place is all about the courtyard. At night, with the fire pit going in the two-level courtyard, this place can be a cozy hangout. It’s more low-key than the rest of its Main Street bar brethren. Entrees: $6-$12. 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Monday-Thursday; 11 a.m.-2 a.m. Friday; noon-2 a.m. Saturday. 1211 Main St., Over-the-Rhine, 513-723-1119.

East Cafe Mediterranean — Tucked into Anderson Towne Center next to Macy’s,

Cafe Mediterranean is swimming in a sea of chains. But Mehmet Coskun is one of two owners of this small, independently owned restaurant. For a relatively new, first restaurant, it’s remarkably polished. The service is impeccable and professional, so much so that it seems choreographed. The dining room is spacious and the decor is elegant and sophisticated. While the restaurant has been open 18 months, the owner still has that new restaurant glow and a high degree of passion (not jadedness) when he talks about his venture. The food will reignite your passion for Mediterranean with its blend of Turkish, Greek and Lebanese dishes. Come on a Monday or Tuesday, both half-price wine nights, and reserve the Ottoman room, where you can eat on ornate pillows strewn across the floor, rural Turkish style. (HS 9-02-09). Entrees: $12.95-$16.95. 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Sunday-Thursday; 11 a.m.11 p.m. Friday-Saturday. 7454 Beechmont Ave., Anderson Twp., 513-232-2400.