Metro Times Summer Guide 060816 by Chava Communications

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Vol. 36 | Issue 35 | June 8-14, 2016

Retail Detail: Glow Fish Studios..... 16

What’s Going On........................ 36

Advertising

Affordable summer entertainment.............................. 58 Your festival survival kit............. 64 The best patios in metro Detroit... 68 What I learned at summer camp... 84

Marketing and Events

Eat

Frisbee League............................ 88

An introduction to the Detroit

Associate Publisher - Jim Cohen Regional Sales Directors - Vinny Fontana, Danielle Smith-Elliott Senior Multimedia Account Executive Paul Biondi, Jeff Nutter Multimedia Account Executives Drew Franklin, Cierra Wood Classified Multimedia Account Executive Bill Rigley Advertising Assistant - Josh Cohen

What’s Going On

A guide to summer festivals....... 50

Greektown at Sundown.............. 42 A list of perfect summer jams..... 46

Big Story

News Hits..................................... 20 Politics & Prejudices ................... 28

News & Views............................. 20

Project Editor - Michael Jackman Associate Editor - Alysa Offman Music Editor - Mike McGonigal Web KWEEN - Alexandra Fluegel Dining Editor - Serena Maria Daniels Investigative Reporter - Allie Gross Contributing Editors - Larry Gabriel, Jack Lessenberry Copy Editor - Esther Gim Senior Intern - Jack Roskopp Editorial Interns - Colleen Kowalewski, Luanne Lim, Selena Aguilera, Sarah Lewis, Megan Fleming, John Akers, Michael Milhim Photography Interns - Liv Martin Contributors- Judy Adams, Taylor Bembery, Stephanie Brothers, Kahn Santori Davison, Aaron Egan, Cornelius Fortune, Cal Garrison, Curt Guyette, Charles L. Latimer, Noelle Lothamer, Jim McFarlin, Jeff Milo, Marc Nader, Dan Savage, Miss Shela, Jane Slaughter, Doug Coombe, Tanya Moutzalias, Dontae Rockymore, Brian Rozman, Steve Sergent, Sean Bieri, Rob Widdis, Adam Woodhead, Shelley Salant, Vaughn Gurganian

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Framed.......................................... 14

Editorial

Feedback........................................ 8

Group Publisher - Chris Keating Publisher - John Badanjek Associate Publisher - Jim Cohen Editor - Dustin Blitchok

Upfront

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Eat Review: Craft Work.............. 94

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Creative Services Graphic Designers - Kristin Borden, Paul Martinez, Christine Hahn, Haimanti Basu

Drink.......................................... 102

Music.......................................... 108 On Sale Now .............................. 114

Arts & Culture.......................... 120 circumstance.............................. 120 Savage Love............................... 134

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On the Cover: Sydney Matthews of Santorini Estiatorio at Greektown at Sundown. Photo by Vaughn Gurganian. Design by Kristin Borden.

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Raise the Bar: Stockyard .......... 104

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U p Front Robert Jim Fulner of Berkley wrote in response to the May 31 blog post “That guy who did a strip-tease at Libertarian Party Convention? Yeah, he’s from Michigan.” I appreciate the spin on the actions of James Weeks of Howell at last weekend’s Libertarian national convention. Although I personally may not have been in favor of his actions, I do generally support freedom of speech, and your piece did stay true to form and removed any body shaming that others might have included. However, you made the same mistake others did. James is not a “former candidate for Livingston County sheriff.” He is the current Libertarian candidate for Livingston County sheriff. And Ben Bachrach of Estero, Fla., (formerly of Dearborn) wrote us: You asked how much of a chance James Weeks II had at being elected national chair. The answer is none. He failed to be elected as a delegate to the national convention by the Libertarian Party of Michigan. He has no support except a little group, mostly from Howell, that seems to enjoy creating chaos wherever they go. He got nominated for national chair by one of his Howell, buddies, who also did not have enough support to get selected to be a delegate by the Libertarian Party of Michigan. I enjoyed your take on the incident, but expect most people who learn of this will not see it in the same light, but rather take it as a reason to dismiss all Libertarians. Also, the June 3 blog post, “Metro Detroit’s bigotry on display in reactions to 13-year-old’s death,” included a few good responses to a commenter who felt Deontae Mitchell and his family were to blame for his death. A reader named jacjoe posted: The child — yes, I said child — was not only killed, but brutally beaten and bound prior to his death. The problem is that, because he was black, people like yourself automatically blame the victim. He did not deserve any of it, and anyone

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feedback

who agrees with this poster needs to take a good hard look at himself in the mirror. If this child were any other color, no one would post this hatred; they would be offering their condolences and attempting to find solutions so that this will not happen again. You should be ashamed. This is the reason that we have a Black Lives Matter movement. I am physically ill after reading these ignorant, condescending, and racist posts.

And Joshua Gillis posted: It is not logical to frame a child’s torture and death as a reasonable outcome for stolen money and being out at 10:30 p.m. in Detroit. To state “regardless of color” is silly. It’s impossible to turn that off. Anything that happens in America inherently has a dimension of race. It might help to acknowledge this. I believe you personally might be very comfortable with not having to reflect on that aspect of your existence often. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t matter. You’re right that assholes come in every color, but when you say this to deflect or distract or undermine a conversation about evidence of systemic racism or bigotry, you’re missing the point. Here, in this specific case, we’re talking about one kind of asshole. Remember that. Avoid using generalities to cloud the point. Be specific and stay specific. I want you to feel encouraged and empowered to admit that you might not be 100 percent correct here. Why? Because education is a continual process and not an event. If you wish to disengage race whenever you feel like it’s too much work to think about, then, in doing so, you show us it is not a priority of yours to understand it and the way it shapes experiences online and offline. A photo by Eaton Blumenstein on last week’s Framed page should have stated that the Summer Sessions seasons opener was at Exodos Lounge. We apologize for the error.

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framed

News

Upfront

U p Front

V Nightclub @ MGM Grand Detroit (D. Rockymore)

DIIV @ The Loving Touch (M. Pfeiffer)

Wild Woody’s (D. Rockymore)

Taste of Chaos @ Freedom Hill (J. Fleury)

Bled Fest (J. Fleury)

DIIV @ The Loving Touch (M. Pfeiffer)

Whiskey Shivers @ the Shelter @ (B. Brookes)

Chevrolet Belle Isle Grand Prix @ Belle Isle (M. Ferdinande)

Peacefest @ L.A. Cafe (M. Pfeiffer)

Classifieds

Culture

Arts

Watch

Music

Drink

Eat

What’s Going On

Big Story

Elektricity (M. Pfeiffer)

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U p Front

retaildetail

n Photo by Liv Martin.

Gifts, goods, and Glow Fish

Wyandotte spot is the perfect place to shop this summer by Alysa Offman We know what you’re thinking: Another story about Wyandotte? Well, yes. As a matter of fact that’s exactly what you’re looking at. And hear us out. This Downriver is pretty great. (Full disclosure: This writer is a lifelong resident) It’s cute, clean, and friendly. The downtown is packed with shops that are totes adorbs and

Inside, shoppers will find a slew of gift-worthy items like books, candles, T-shirts, and knick-knacks. They have Detroit-centric items, like a book by Andy and Emily Linn, the brother and sister team that owns City Bird and Nest. They carry Michigan-themed stickers that are perfect for your car’s back window to let the world know

Glow Fish Studios

2840 Biddle Ave., Wyandotte; 734-552-6323; glowfishstudios.com locally-owned bars and restaurants. There are community gardens, beautiful parks, and well-kept historic homes. Who could ask for anything more? Glow Fish Studios is one of those aforementioned shops, and with its hip and quirky wares, it’s something of an unexpected addition to the downtown district’s offerings.

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you’re proudly from a mitten-shaped state. But to keep things from getting too cutesy, the shop carries a lot more than just locally made goods or things pertaining to Detroit and Michigan. They also have clothing, decor, journals, jewelry (we’re currently in love with a pair of arrowhead earrings), bath and body products, and plenty

more items that are just cool. In fact, the shop carries so many items, we could almost liken it to Clawson’s amazing Leon & Lulu’s, though they don’t carry any furniture, and it isn’t anywhere near as large. Still, the place packs quite the inventory, and there is plenty that will appeal to a diverse audience. One thing that makes this shop particularly awesome is that it is appealing to both kids and adults. They carry funny stuffed animals and toys, plus inexpensive jewelry and other little things to entertain children. They are also a purveyor of Kendama, a fun Japanese toy that will keep little people busy for hours. Glow Fish Studios also offers arts classes for adults such as knitting and precious metal clay classes. Check the website for more info and a full schedule on classes.

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House passes DPS legislation, critics say bills will cripple struggling district by Allie Gross The Michigan House of Representatives passed a package of Detroit Public Schools bills last week in a vote (55-53) that just managed to squeak by. The package, which looks very similar to previous iterations of the House legislation, now heads to the Senate. The House bill divides DPS into two districts: Old DPS, which is responsible for paying off the district’s debt, and the “Detroit Community Schools” district, which is responsible for educating students. The Detroit Community Schools district will receive a transitional loan of $150 million, to be used for teachers, vendors, financial services, and cash flow needs (only $25 million can be used for building maintenance and improvement). Additionally, it will be given funds to deal with its debt, which currently hovers at $467 million (though it will now grow to $617 million when including the transitional loan). Under the plan, local property taxes, typically earmarked for students (known as per pupil funding) will be used by the “Old DPS” for debt payment, and in order to close any funding gaps from this redirection, the new district will be given $72 million a year. The House plan caps this amount, which comes from tobacco settlement proceeds, at $617 million (i.e. 8 1/2 years). This leaves some concerned about how DPS will survive down the line, since it’s estimated it will take the district about 10 years to pay off its operating debt. “It is simply unclear how New DPS would survive after 8 1/2 years — the point in time when the annual $72 million payments would run out under the amended House bills,” writes Nick Krieger, a constitutional law attorney who has been focusing on the legislative plans for Detroit on his blog Fix the Mitten. “It appears to me that the Michigan House of Representatives — by refusing to provide a full 10 years’ worth of funding for New DPS, even though New DPS will not be able to

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raise its own operating revenue for 10 years — has designed its plan to intentionally cripple the new district.” Another component of the bill that raises questions about the district’s future is a clause that allows the district to outsource its superintendent to another district — essentially letting another school district absorb DPS. In addition to opening up a gray area when it comes to the future of the district, the bills are notable for being harsher on teachers. The house’s Putting Students First plan allows the district — and only DPS — to hire noncertified individuals to teach in the district’s classrooms, a move that has been criticized for deprofessionalizing the field. It also kicks off a merit pay system for any new teachers in the district, and only in the Detroit district. A companion bill includes penalties for striking teachers. One of the only wins for the teachers is the fact the House did not keep its controversial amendment that would have banned collective bargaining. “I’m disappointed. You had an opportunity to write history that put children first, not politics,” state Rep. Sherry Gay-Dagnogo (D-Detroit) said Thursday after the vote. “Teachers feel they’re left behind and being treated like second-class citizens.” The close vote ran along party lines, with all but eight Republicans voting in favor of the package and zero Democrats voting yes. One particularly terse part of the legislative debate centers around the Detroit Education Commission, a coalition that would oversee the opening and closing of schools in the city. The commission, which is included in a Senate plan, was not included in the House bill. The controversial coalition has earned the ire of charter school advocates, who believe the board — which would be appointed by Mayor Mike Duggan — would be too politicized and ultimately hinder charter school growth. While some public

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news hits

‘Increasing oversight over DPS schools and teachers while removing the DEC and similar provisions for charter schools sets a disturbing precedent.’ school advocates have also been critical of the coalition, taking issue with the fact that it lacks democratic accountability, the reality is without any coalition many of Detroit’s competition issues (issues that have led to this very scenario of insolvency) remain. “We only asked for two major things: pay the DPS debt that state appointees rung up, and for some type of commission that provides real accountability for taxpayer-funded schools,” says Rep. Adam Zemke (D-Ann Arbor), who believes the bills work in favor of the city’s poorly regulated charter schools. “This isn’t accountability. It’s a joke.” Democrats have also pointed out what they believe to be a “loophole” in the legislation, which would allow persistently failing charters to stay open. Under the legislation, if a DPS school is deemed a failure, the State School Reform/Redesign Office would decide how it wants to “turn it around” (there are four options, two of which include turning the school into a charter and closing it). How to handle failing charter schools, however, is up to the school’s authorizer; and according to the House legislation, the sponsor can keep the school open if it is “undergoing reconstitution.” This somewhat vague term raises a number of questions — namely what constitutes as “reconstitution.” Charter advocates say “reconstitution” requires serious changes on the part of the school, but critics worry this clause will allow failing charters to go unchecked and remain open. “Some of the changes that were made to this bill would force the closure of traditional public schools but allow failing charter schools to continue to operate indefinitely,” House Minority Leader Tim Greimel (D-Auburn Hills) told The Detroit News after the vote. Unsurprisingly, charter school advocates were pleased with the lack of a regulating board, such as the DEC, in the House legislation.

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“Despite efforts by some of the elites and big-city bosses who believe they know what is best for children, it is a time-honored truth that parents and families are best at choosing educational opportunities that best meet their needs of their children,” Gary Naeyaert, executive director of the Great Lakes Education Project, a Dick DeVos-funded charter advocacy program, told the Detroit Free Press. This sentiment was reiterated by Speaker of the House Kevin Cotter (RMount Pleasant), who stated Thursday: “This is a plan put forward to save education in Detroit and at the same time avoid what would be a disastrous bankruptcy. It protects taxpayers and makes sure this system stays sound for years to come.” Cotter has received over $20,000 from the pro-charter lobby, including $12,500 from the union-averse, procharter DeVos family. As MT reported last month, the DeVos family is incredibly invested in the House legislation. This overwhelming support for the legislation by competitors of the traditional school district raises questions about the end goals, and also how the pro-charter lobby may have influenced the vote and ultimate outcome for the district. “The House bill in its current form is a stopgap measure that does the bare minimum to address the issues the school district faces,” John Grover, who wrote Loveland’s recent report, “A school district in crisis: Detroit Public Schools 1842-2015,” tells MT. “Increasing oversight over DPS schools and teachers while removing the DEC and similar provisions for charter schools sets a disturbing precedent.”

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politics&prejudices

Relentless negative action by Jack Lessenberry You have to give Rick Snyder credit for something. He has suffered perhaps the most embarrassing rebuke at the hands of law enforcement authorities of any Michigan governor ever. Sometime after it became clear that his appointed emergency managers poisoned the water in Flint, and he dragged his feet about doing anything about it, the governor evidently decided to launch one or more internal investigations, presumably to figure out who to blame. But late last month, local, state, and federal authorities landed on him like a pro wrestler on a tieless squeaky mat. Michigan Attorney General Bill Schuette and Genesee County Prosecutor David Leyton called on Snyder to stop his apparently ham-handed probes, because they said they were damaging the criminal investigations they are running. Additionally, U.S. District Attorney Barbara McQuade attacked an investigation being conducted by the Department of State police. The Snyderites were stunned. Press Secretary Anna Heaton released a statement that bleated: “No agency has ever raised any concerns with our office before now.” Then Snyder signaled that he would do as requested. He had little choice. He could, after all, scarcely attack the criticism as a partisan witch hunt. Not only is Leyton a Democrat and Schuette a Republican, they ran against each other in 2010. Nobody these days has much admiration for Snyder, who apparently didn’t worry for a minute about Flint’s kids. He didn’t even consider not giving them the bad water, even after a General Motors plant announced in October 2014 that they were paying extra for another water source, since the Flint River water was corroding their engine parts! That doesn’t mean that Schuette doesn’t have his own self-interest primarily in mind. He plans to be the GOP nominee for governor of Michigan in two years. If he’s to have any hope of winning in November, he’ll have to separate himself from a fellow Republican pariah named Snyder. (Leyton, for reasons I

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can’t quite fathom, has transformed himself into Schuette’s mini-me and acolyte.) But it scarcely matters; Snyder is political carrion, with scarcely more clout on many issues than the homeless ranters on the corner. To some extent, this is unfortunate. His plans to save Detroit’s public schools and fix the roads were better than anything proposed by the legislature. Snyder deserves some credit for the masterful handling of Detroit’s bankruptcy, and assuming the needed new bridge over the Detroit River actually happens, Snyder will be the only reason we allowed Canada to get it done. However, except for getting himself elected, he has absolutely no feeling for politics, people, or how to make government work. I was at first astonished that Schuette launched his public attack on Snyder’s investigation without giving him a heads-up first. Frank Kelley, who was Michigan’s attorney general for 37 years, early on adopted the policy of never blindsiding a governor like this, even one with whom he politically disagreed. (I know something about this, having co-written The People’s Lawyer, a book about Kelley’s life and career.) But then I learned that Schuette for once may have been justified; Snyder was so politically stupid he didn’t even tell the state’s chief law enforcement officer that he was launching an investigation.

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politics&prejudices

John Selleck, Schuette’s main mouthpiece, told reporters that the attorney general only learned of the governor’s internal inquiry into the Department of Environmental Quality when Snyder mentioned it in a press conference. Now, granted: Snyder and Schuette never have liked each other. But given that Snyder has gotten the taxpayers to cough up $1.2 million for his legal expenses in connection with Flint, don’t you think he ought to have informed the office of the attorney general that he was launching his own probe? Oops. Well, payback time. When the attorney general’s spokesman was asked if his boss’s action was a warning to Snyder that a criminal charge of obstruction of justice was possible, all Selleck would say is this: “Prosecutor Leyton and Attorney General Schuette felt it was necessary to make clear the gravity of the situation.” How this will all play out isn’t clear, but three things are: A) Snyder really ought to quit. There’s no way he can ever be a fully effective governor for the next 2 ½ years B) Neither Schuette nor the Democrats want him to quit; that would mean they’d have to contend with an incumbent Gov. Brian Calley, who could and would run for re-election C) Snyder will never quit, unless as part of a plea bargaining deal. Look: If this multimillionaire cared about the people, would he be asking the taxpayers to cough up $400,000 to protect him against civil and $800,000 to protect him from criminal liability in regards to the Flint mess? That’s relentless positive public service for you!

Gang that can’t shoot straight update John Stuart Mill, the 19th century philosopher whose essay “On Liberty” has been forced on generations of students, supposedly referred to conservatives as “the stupid party.” However, he was British, died in 1873, and never experienced the delights of today’s Republicans and Democrats. Had he done so, he might well have decided instead that the liberals were the stupid party, and usually the only option to the other, aka pure evil, party. Case in point: Democrats and labor unions are usually happy to raise millions for sometimes hopeless candidates, or ballot proposals that have little chance of passing, and many of which would scarcely change the status

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quo if they did. But when it comes to trying to fix the system so that real change is possible, forget it. Currently there are 27 Republican state senators and only 10 Democrats. (They had 11, but one had to quit when they sent him to jail.) Thanks to outrageous gerrymandering, it is literally impossible, given the shape of these districts, to imagine Democrats winning a state Senate majority, absent a GOP-caused catastrophe worse than the Great Recession. Last year, the League of Women Voters of Michigan held a series of forums around the state on redistricting. Pretty much everyone agreed it was needed. But the league did nothing. Nobody was willing to make an effort to try and get it on the ballot. Nor did the labor unions or the Democrats or any supposed good government groups get behind an effort to ask the voters to change to a vote-by-mail system, something that would have both helped democracy and saved money. Recently, I spoke to a league chapter in Leelanau County, near Traverse City. “They (state League of Women Voters officials) said they didn’t have enough money to get (redistricting reform) on the ballot,” one member said. Right. Well, there was this little socialist guy named Bernie Sanders who wanted to run for president and didn’t have any money either, and decided to try to raise it cheaply online. Last time I checked, he’d taken in more than $200 million. You can’t fault the Democrats, however; they were too busy being ecstatic that they had persuaded Little House on the Prairie 1970s TV actress Melissa Gilbert to run for Congress. Unfortunately, she turned out to be a political airhead who owed the IRS more than $360,000, and tried her best to be more inept than Terri Lynn Land. Eventually, after it turned out she defended a child rapist and didn’t have the guts to answer questions at a chamber of commerce function, she claimed illness and fled the race. That left Democrats with no candidate against the fragrant Mike Bishop, a mostly owned subsidiary of Matty Moroun. Somewhere, Soapy Williams is crying.

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what’sgoingon

Art | Dance | Comedy | Eat | Theater

SAT-SUN, 6/11-6/12 Motor City Pride @ Hart Plaza

Yasss, one of our favorite weekends in summer. This year’s Pride boasts five stages with back-to-back performances, over 100 vendors, and of course, a parade unlike any other (which starts at noon on Sunday). From drag shows to spoken word artists, there’s no shortage of fun ways to unite for equality.

Runs 1 to 8 p.m. Saturday and noon to 7 p.m. Sunday; 1 Hart Plaza, Detroit; info@motorcitypride.org; motorcitypride.org; $5 cover charge, ages 12 and under are free.

n Motor City Pride @ Hart Plaza. Photo by Tony Lowe.

THURSDAY, 6/9

Saturday, 6/11

Cocktails in the Garden

Reading + Conversation: Frances Stroh Beer Money

69: Rap Electronic Life Ft Ajax Stacks and Dj Brexx

Ann Arbor Summer Festival kick-off

@ MOCAD

@ The Grasshopper Underground

Author Frances Stroh, who recently released the memoir Beer Money: A Memoir of Privilege and Loss about coming of age as a member of Detroit’s Stroh’s Beer family — you may have read an excerpt in MT a few weeks back — will discuss the book with Tony Barlow. Stroh will share the painful unraveling of her family and the struggle to find her own identity and way back as an artist, and the reading will be followed by a book signing in the MOCAD store.

Described as “Squad Up. Grasshopper. Thursday. 6/9. Lit.” on its Facebook page (translation: bring your friends, shit’s gonna be fun), and “a culture blast for the ears and eyes,” this is a chance to see some up-and-coming talent in a pretty underrated venue. The headliner Dj Brexx is also known as The Twerkulator, which is amazing, and Ajax Stacks has been making waves in the Grand Rapids hip-hop scene (seriously, that’s a thing) for quite a few years now, so this show should be at least three fire emojis.

@ The Scarab Club

Who says drinking and culture can’t go hand in hand? Celebrate the beginning of summer in The Scarab Club’s beautiful walled garden. The art gallery is hosting a cocktail party, complete with “tantalizing summer drinks” like lemon balm mojitos, yummy finger food, music from The Antekes, and its exhibition “Bloom, Bugs, Beasts.”

7-10 p.m.; 217 Farnsworth Ave., Detroit; 313-831-1250; scarabclubofdetroit.org; tickets are $30 for members, $35 for nonmembers.

Starts at 7 p.m.; 4454 Woodward Ave.; Detroit; 313-832-6622; mocadetroit.org; free (suggested donation of $5).

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Starts at 9 p.m.; 22757 Woodward Ave.; Ferndale; 248-298-0330; thegrasshopperunderground.com.

@ Downtown Ann Arbor

Michigan’s progressive mecca holds its annual world-class celebration of arts and entertainment June 10-July 3. Since that’s almost a month’s worth of activities, you’re better off hitting up their site for all the deets, but we will say that there’s going to be 18-foot-tall dinosaurs milling about some days because hey, why not?

Festivities start at 5 p.m.; downtown Ann Arbor; 734-9945999; a2sf.org.

Art | Dance | Comedy | Eat | Theater

UpFront

what’sgoingon

| News | Feature | What’s Going On

SATURDAY, 6/11 Vernor’s 150th Anniversary Party @ Detroit Historical Museum

Eat |

n Vernor’s 150th Birthday Party @ Detroit Historical Museum. Photo via vernorsclub.weebly.com.

Drink

Events begin at 11 a.m.; 5401 Woodward Ave., Detroit; 313-8337935; vernorsclub.weebly.com; Free.

America’s oldest soda pop is 150, and the city is celebrating in a big way. Some of the day’s activities include a poker run, films, and a world record attempt for the most pop drinkers. Repay the beverage for all the times it’s gotten you through a workday hungover by toasting in its honor.

Saturday, 6/11

SUNDAY, 6/12

Hot 107.5 FM Summer Jamz 19

Trevor Noah

All Drag Improv Spectacular

Shed 5 Flea

@ Detroit Opera House

Culture

10 a.m.-4 p.m.; 2934 Russell St., Detroit; 734-459-0050; shed5flea.com; Free admission.

8 p.m. and 10 p.m.; 261 E. Nine Mile, Ferndale; 248-327-0575; gocomedy.net; $18.1648; entry is free.

Pickers, makers, and shopkeepers unite at Eastern Market for the first of three vintage flea markets this summer. You can expect a hefty dose of architectural salvage, vintage, antiques, and craft good, plus jewelry, clothing, old tools, and tons of other cool things. Can’t make this one? Mark your calendars for the other two: July 10 and August 14.

Arts

8 p.m.; 1526 Broadway St., Detroit; 313-237-7464;

Prepare yourself for lip-sync battles, laughs, and a whole lot of glitter. In celebration of Pride month, Go Comedy! presents its first ever all-drag improv spectacular for one night and one night only. $3 from every ticket sold will benefit Affirmations.

You may know of him as the guy who’s “not as good as Jon Stewart” as host of The Daily Show from your friends who can’t get over that Jon Stewart’s not on The Daily Show anymore, but the South African comedian has a killer standup routine perfected after years of performing. If you haven’t checked out his Netflix specials and documentary, do yourself a favor and watch them immediately. You’ll want a ticket to this for sure.

Watch

It’s Weezy F. Baby and the F is for “fuck yeah.” The New Orleans rapper is teaming up with everyone’s favorite stripper lover 2Chainz to headline the show, which also boasts R&B divas Keyshia Cole and Teyana Taylor, Detroit sweetheart Dej Loaf (and her boo Lil Durk), the guys that made dabbing a thing (Migos), and Fetty Wap. C’mon now, you know you wanna see Fetty Wap. If you want to hear all the songs you’ve been singing every summer for the past decade live, this is the show

@ Eastern Market

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Music

Saturday, 6/11

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in the

Summer Park C O N C E R T S

2 0 1 6

Can You Feel a Brand New Day? Carr Center Celebrates Summer 2016!

Hosted by The Carr Center Exhibitions Earth, Wind & Sanctuary Through June 30 An exhibit capturing Michael Sharpe’s escape to Yosemite with his son, Fletcher. The American landscape has been treacherous for Black men, wrought with poplar trees & burning air. Survival has become second nature. Survival is our first art. So we escape. Escape means risk; leaving home to find a higher form of freedom. Father and son embark upon a photographic mission to reclaim artistic sanctuary and to negotiate their relationship with nature. How do we find reprieve and carve space where we are safe to pursue what we love? How do we capture that freedom and bring it home?

“ABC’s of Art,” curated by Myett Risker Through June 30

Beatrice Buck Paradise Valley Park All concerts begin at 6:00 p.m. unless otherwise noted

Celebrating Black Music Month (BMM) Curated by Devine Taylor June 9 Dave Hamilton Band June 16 Maestro Pastor Steve Thompson and Friends

June 23 Big Will 360 June 30 “Our Songs... Our Stories” presented by Michigan Sings, Inc.

An art show, where each artist/poet received a letter from the alphabet. With that letter, they created anything that represented the letter they received. The artists work will be displayed at the Carr Center and the poets will recite their poem opening night.

June 10 | 6 p.m. A night with James Cornish; music and poetry. June 14 | 7 p.m. Artists Talk June 17 | 6 p.m. Rosemarie Wilson presents; ABC’s of Poetry in the D.

Poor Man’s Art Collective (PMAC), Presents: Independent Artists United at The Carr Center July 8 – August 19

Original Jazz to Original World Fusion Curated by Bill Foster, Jazz Network Foundation June 14 Obed Succori Trio June 21 Mark Stone Group

June 28 Steve Grady Kasan Belgrave The Jazz Off Band

Tuesday Smooze Days Curated by Zana Smith, Spectacles July 5 Yaminah and Jazzy Soul July 12 Collective Peace

July 19 Brandon Williams July 26 Lin Rountree

Carr Center Yesterday and Today Curated by Shane McKeever July 7 Alex Way July 14 Carr Center Jazz Academy

July 21 Alex Colista July 28 Shane McKeever

Something Different Curated by Oliver Ragsdale, Jr. August 2 Tia Imani Hanna Project August 9 Indian Winds, Strings and Percussion

August 16 Upfront Detroit August 23 Taiko Drums August 30 Opera MODO

Polyfold Summer Residency Curated by the members of Polyfold August 4 Music of Daher, Jones and Setzler August 11 Music of Kashperko, Koi and Taylor

August 18 Music of Levine, Malis and Shadik August 25 Music of Statin, Tucker and Uesaka 8 p.m. Geri Allen September 1 Back to Cool

Independent Artists United will be the platform for unique and dynamic artists who operate outside of the mainstream art community, providing an atmosphere of creative energy allowing the artists to move forward and challenge preconceived ideas as to what art is!!! This event will showcase works by established and emerging artists who have a deeply vested interest in challenging ideas while helping to creatively push Detroit into the future.

July 15 | 6 p.m. – 9 p.m. Opening Night Reception, Food Tasting by: The Bearded Chef Pastries July 27 | 6 p.m. – 9 p.m. LGBT Detroit: Hotter Than July Art Reception July 29 | 6 p.m. – 9 p.m. The Poet’s Club w/One Single Rose August 5 | 6 p.m. – 9 p.m. Artist to Artist (Artist Talk)

Detroit’s Fav Artists - New Horizons August 31 – October 15 September 8 Opening Reception October 6 Artists 2 Artists

Special Events

June 11 | 7 p.m. Jessica Care Moore in Concert June 14 Paradise Valley Park Summer Installation Unveiling July 7 | 7 p.m. Artists 2 Artists July 15 | 6 p.m. Garden Tea Party July 22 | 6 p.m. Resilience: Tidal Wave August 4 Community Art Project in the Park August 12 & 13 Trinity International Film Festival August 25-27 Detroit Dance Festival August 28 Detroit Youth Monologue Competition Finals September 4 Detroit Jazz Jam October 6 | Artists 2 Artists

Carr Center Summer Arts Academy

The Summer Arts Academy (SAA) is an intensive program designed to provide challenging educational and training experiences in the fine and performing arts. SAA is designed to nurture the talents of emerging young artists in visual arts, dance, and jazz music. Find your home at the Carr Center Summer Arts Academy 2016 and nurture a love for the arts!

www.TheCarrCenter.org 3111 East Grand River Ave. | Detroit, MI 48226

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Opa! Greektown at Sundown returns by MT staff

n Photos by Vaughn Gurganian.

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Monroe Avenue is transforming into a pedestrian party from 6-10 p.m. every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday night for the second year in a row with the return of Greektown at Sundown. The event closes the street to vehicles and brings street performers, entertainers, live music, interactive art, window displays, and more to Greektown; it takes place on Monroe between Beaubien and St. Antoine. The kickoff of Greektown at Sundown earlier this month was done in partnership with the 2016 Grand Prix, with an IndyCar and some of the race’s drivers visiting Monroe Avenue. “We are excited to celebrate the return of Greektown’s summer weekend event series and the return of racing to Detroit,” Greektown Preservation Society President Tasso Teftsis says in a release. Teftsis is the co-owner of Astoria Pastry Shop, Redsmoke Barbeque, and Krema. “We would like to thank Greektown Casino-Hotel for their continued support

of Greektown at Sundown, helping us to bring increased visitors and revenue to Detroit and to Greektown.” The following restaurants offer al fresco dining during Greektown at Sundown: Astoria Pastry Shop, Cold Stone Creamery, Golden Fleece, Krema, Pappy’s Bar & Grill, PizzaPapalis, Plaka, Redsmoke Barbeque, Santorini Estiatorio, and Sharky’s on Monroe. Actor Mark Wahlberg’s burger chain Wahlburgers also plans to offer outdoor seating at its Greektown location when it opens this summer, according to a release. For more information about Greektown at Sundown, visit facebook.com/greektowndetroit.

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n The Dramatics. Photo courtesy Stax.

Summer jams make us feel fine

Blowing through the jasmine in our minds by local music luminaries We asked local music types for a few words about their favorite summertime songs. “Be Nice Honey,” Jimmy Ohio The title for this song was actually inspired by my own band Dear Darkness’ album Be Nice Honey. It’s from Ohio’s upcoming album, Phantom Stereo, and is like a drive down Eight Mile during late July. The tune is hot as hell and burning with neon lights. Guitars squeal and misbehave when Ohio croons, “Oh be nice honey/Be nice to me.” The drum machine makes me feel cool and modern, as I sniff the Eight Mile air, all gasoline and fried fish. Whenever I introduce Jimmy Ohio to someone, I call him a “Detroit legend,” and rightfully so. -Stacey MacLeod (Dear Darkness) “Candy,” Iggy Pop This may seem a little odd, and I am not sure why this song comes to mind, but it always reminds me of summer. It may be a shirtless Iggy strumming an acoustic on a leather chair in a garden of flowers that does it. -Emma Guzman (formerly Emma Islands) “Feel It,” Sam Cooke Particularly the version from Live At The Harlem Square Club, 1963. I’ve spent a good chunk of a lifetime of summers driving around blasting this record. Not sure I’ve ever heard a more festive sounding crowd on a live record. Pure fun. –Tony Viviano (Brick Hours, Cujo) “Flowers,” Tyvek This one never made it onto any of their full-length albums, but it’s one of my favorites. “I’m on the surface of the earth and I like to have a good time on it, like to push up on it.”

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-Adam Hunter (Fake Surfers, Growwing Pains) “Friday Night August 14,” Funkadelic Released in July 1970 on Free Your Mind and Your Ass Will Follow, and reportedly written about a particularly badass Friday night, this fuzzed out summer jam classic, overflowing with echoplex and wah wah guitar, is equally effective on hot Friday nights in June, July, and August that aren’t the 14th. -Warren Defever (His Name is Alive, producer) “Get Down Saturday Night,” Oliver Cheatham It took me a while to get into this song but now I’m obsessed with it. It’s basically an anthem for partying and not doing chores and making love all night long in a smooth way. –Johnny Ill (map enthusiast) “Good Ass Day,” Doughboyz Cashout This song is the Detroit version of Ice Cube’s “It Was A Good Day” — classic bars; you can live every line. –Sheefy McFly/Edward Elecktro (Detroit legend/creative) “Haul and Pull Up Selector,” Carl Meeks I went to NYC once and bought a bunch of 45s, and when I got to the airport they made me pull them all out and didn’t know what the hell 45s were, and thought it might be a bomb. This was one of those records. It just sounds like a summer party in someone’s backyard. I love the drumbeat. I’m not sure what you call it, but it needs a name so I can identify more songs like this. –Johnny Ill (map enthusiast)

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| June 8-14, 2016

F EATURE “Hey! Little Child,” Alex Chilton Big Star’s more of a late summer/fall jam for me lately. But [Chilton solo records such as] Like Flies on Sherbert or High Priest hit the stereo as soon as I can roll the windows down. Again, you gotta be in a car, but as far as cruising around the city goes, the cool laid back vocals of Chilton, and the drunk band behind him, begs no question why you shouldn’t be day drinking or eating half a watermelon in your lap with a spoon driving down Jefferson. I like to break the watermelon in half by dropping it in the parking lot, and then put the other half in the cooler for later. - Andrew Hecker (Tin Foil, Craig Brown Band) “Joy Road,” Lyman Woodard Organization Sometimes you don’t need to party in the summer, because you do that too much, sometimes you need something mellow and contemplative. You can listen to this monster of a record and sip on your drink. –Johnny Ill (map enthusiast) “New Kid in Town,” Eagles One of our favorite Eagles tunes. Sounds like a sunny California summer with just enough heartache to make it satisfying. Also, mind-blowing harmonies. -Carrie Shepard and Lawrence Daversa (The Whiskey Charmers) “No New Buzz,” Clone Defects This is my favorite song to listen to when driving back into Detroit after a tour. I love the first line: “Headed down the freeway in a beat up Ford van, headed to your downtown to entertain you women.” Growwing Pains’ old van was this rusty Ford death trap, so we could relate. -Adam Hunter (Fake Surfers, Growwing Pains)

48 June 8-14, 2016 2016 || metrotimes.com metrotimes.com

feature “Summer Is Almost Here,” Pas/Cal Pas/Cal — Detroit’s own disbanded Belle & Sebastian or Grandaddy — here offers up an anthem for the sun. The song transports me to hot afternoons of reading on a blanket, under cover of leaves. The music bounces and Casimer Pascal’s brocade vocals intone “short pants are a sign weakness … Hot seats and a burning dashboard.” Hand claps and do, do, do’s — the song splits apart with a trashy guitar solo and melts together again with organs and strings. From a split 12-inch with La Laque, this single from 2005 finds immortality in the memory of a sticky summer, eating pizza at the Magic Stick. -Stacey MacLeod (Dear Darkness) “Summer Madness,” Kool and The Gang It’s funny to me now, but as a little boy I would fall asleep every night to ‘Pillow Talk’ on 100.3 WNIC. And if I wasn’t already lulled to sleep by all that easy listening, I’d be paralyzed with fear when this song came on at midnight, signaling the end of the show. The syrupy slow, ascending synthlines sound great to me now. –Tony Viviano (Brick Hours, Cujo) “Sunshine Superman,” Donovan The hotter and more humid it is, the better this song sounds in a car. I guess you could say that about any summer song; they sound best in a car. It’ll come on the second you take a wrong turn and get lost up north, or as you take a left at the Belle Isle gate. Best thing (Jimmy Page) ever did. -Andrew Hecker (Tin Foil, Craig Brown Band)

“Pink Frost,” The Chills It’s always advisable to find a nice, dark spot to cool off on sticky, humid days. –Tony Viviano (Brick Hours, Cujo)

“The River,” Bruce Springsteen “But I remember us riding in my brother’s car. Her body tan and wet down at the reservoir. At night on them banks I’d lie awake. And pull her close just to feel each breath she’d take.” Need we say more? -Carrie Shepard and Lawrence Daversa (The Whiskey Charmers)

“Sex On the Beach,” DJ Assault When I hear this track, I think of cruising around Belle Isle heading to a barbecue sippin’ a brew hanging with the homies. The track is chill enough to ride to and hype enough to get the party started when you pull up to the function. –Sheefy McFly/Edward Elecktro (Detroit legend/creative)

“What You See Is What You Get,” The Dramatics A classic Detroit jam that I never get tired of. This song is full of things that you never hear anymore: the guy who only sings really deep teamed up with a guy who sings really high, and a weird vocal noise that isn’t words. –Johnny Ill (map enthusiast)

“Shenorock Lane,” Jay Gonzalez The final track on Gonzalez’ The Bitter Suite has a driving pop lilt that goes perfectly with a glass of lemonade and sunshine. The album is about a break up, but the melodies lift me up and always make me smile. Weird how music works sometimes. -Emma Guzman (formerly Emma Islands)

“You Need Another Drink,” Disco D Infamous party song in Detroit; makes me think of girls poppin’ and cold Faygo. –Sheefy McFly/Edward Elecktro (Detroit legend/creative)

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| June 8-14, 2016

F EATURE

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n Stars and Stripes Festival. Courtesy photo.

Eat, drink, and listen: A guide to Detroit festivals to get your summer moving by MT staff June 10-11 and Aug. 26-27 Keloorah As if a weekend of NASCAR wasn’t enough, some major musical acts have been added to the Keloorah festival at Michigan International Speedway later this month, including Third Eye Blind, Fitz and the Tantrums, GROUPLOVE, Chase Rice, and many more. For two weekends, first on June 10-11 and again on Aug. 26-27, Keloorah fest will take over MIS with live concerts, DJs, a go-kart experience, a video game arcade, outdoor sports bar, tailgate games, foam and paint parties, and more, all on NASCAR race weekends. The activities are accessible with the purchase of both the NASCAR Sprint Cup Series admission and Keloorah admission tickets. Michigan International Speedway is at 12626 US-12 in Brooklyn, Mich. Visit mispeedway.com/keloorah for more information. June 11-12 Motor City Pride How lucky are we? We live during a point in history where being gay is no longer taboo. We live during a point in history where gay men and women parade in the streets waving rainbow flags, welcoming all to join them. That’s the point of Motor City Pride. It isn’t just for gay people. It’s for all people. The music, the entertainment, the merrymaking, and the burlesque, the drag, the Mr. and Mrs. Motor City Pride pageant — it’s all part of the event that welcomes us all to spend time together. Runs from 1-8 p.m. Saturday, June 11 and

noon to 7 p.m. Sunday, June 12; Hart Plaza, Detroit; 313-537-7000; motorcitypride.org. June 18 Summer Beer Fest The best thing about summer in Michigan is drinking copious amounts of craft beer while enjoying the sweet, sweet sunshine. Metro Times’ own Summer Beer Fest allows you to do just that (or enjoy the air conditioning inside the Royal Oak Farmers Market, your choice). There are over 150 beers and ciders available for tasting, and many of them are made-inMichigan craft brews. There will also be plenty of food available for purchase, plus live entertainment. Runs from 7:30-11 p.m. 316 E. 11 Mile Rd., Royal Oak; royaloakbeerfest.com/summer-beerfest; general admission tickets are $15, VIP are $20. June 24-26 Great Lakes Food, Art & Music Festival This year is the Great Lakes Food, Art & Music Festival’s sophomore run. It’s a class act with tons of great food, beer, art, live entertainment, and more. In fact, 30,000 people attended this festival last year! Attendees can expect to nosh on cuisine from over 20 local restaurants, from Italian to Asian to Polish to Mexican to barbecue and beyond. The whole thing takes place in Northville’s Ford Field and Park. Runs 5-11 p.m. Friday, noon-11 p.m. Saturday, noon-8 p.m. Sunday; 151 Griswold St., Northville; foodartmusicfest.com; free entry.

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June 24-26 Detroit River Days There will be live music from Queen of Pies Patti LaBelle, the B-52’s, The Voice contestant Laith Al-Saadi, carnival rides, food, beer, and plenty more, and it’s all taking place on the beautiful Detroit Riverfront. There will also be an air show, a zipline, buskers, fire performers, park activities, Diamond Jack River Boat tours, and a kids stage, and it’s all happening near places like the RenCen and Atwater Brewery. Consider this a great way to enjoy the fair city of Detroit. Runs 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Friday, 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Saturday, 11 a.m.-10 p.m. Sunday; Detroit Riverfront; 313-566-8200; riverdays. com; $3 for adults before 5 p.m., $5 after 5 p.m., children 3 and younger and adults 65 and older are free.

open to the public; for more information, see funfestevents.net/stars-stripes-festival.

June 30-July 3 Stars & Stripes Festival Poor Macomb County. It doesn’t get half the summer fun its neighboring counties have. But the return of the annual Stars & Stripes Festival helps make up for it, offering talent including native Macomber Uncle Kracker, Westland’s own Josh Gracin, Styx, Seether, and Led Zeppelin 2 (the band, not the album). There’ll be more than just jams, though: Expect a carnival, fireworks, a BMX stunt show, a petting zoo, a classic K-9 show, and more. Event is 2-11 p.m. Thursday and Friday, and noon-11 p.m. Saturday and Sunday, at Freedom Hill County Park, 14900 Metropolitan Pkwy., Sterling Heights; free and

July 1-4 Rib Fest Metro Times and Ultimate Fun Productions kick off Michigan Rib Fest the weekend of July 1-4 at M1 Concourse in Pontiac. The new auto enthusiast development on Woodward Avenue — which includes a 1.5-mile road track — plays host to Ribfest, with multiple music stages, a kids’ zone, and more. Rib Fest is from 5-11 p.m. July 1, noon to 11 p.m. July 2 and 3, and noon to 8 p.m. July 4 at M1 Concourse, at Woodward Avenue and South Boulevard in Pontiac.

July 1-3 Corktown Strut And here we have another brand-new art/music/food festival, which neatly coincides with Independence Day, and takes place at most major venues and bars in Corktown — PJ’s, Two James, Batch, Katoi, Mudgie’s, and more. The main thrust of the strut is Saturday, July 2-Sunday, July 3, with super-packed festivities planned at all the venues, including Warren Defever (His Name Is Alive) assembling a star-studded showcase at UFO Factory on Sunday, June 3. This is one not to miss. Multiple venues in Corktown; forwardartsdetroit@gmail.com; corktownstrut. com; Early bird two-day pass $25.

July 8-10 American Polish Festival Ah, another great thing about living in

metrotimes.com

| June 8-14, 2016

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n The Beggars perform at Pig & Whiskey. MT file photo. this great mitten-shaped state of ours are the many Polish-American festivals that take place. This particular fest is home to the official Srodek pierogi eating contest, the winner of which takes home a $500 prize (sign us up!). There’s also live music from the Polish Muslims, Lenny Gomulka & Chicago Push, John Klakulak and the K-Tones, the New Brass Express, and polka country musicians. There will be a beer tent with domestic and Polish beer, a kielbasa “kafe,” a craft show, rides for kids, and a Polish-American mass at noon Sunday. Runs 4 p.m.-1 a.m. Friday, 10 a.m.-1 a.m. Saturday, and 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Sunday; 33204 Maple Lane, Sterling Heights; 586264-7990; americanpolishfestival.com; tickets are $2 for those 18 and older, 17 and younger are free.

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July 14-17 Concert of Colors You know what to expect from this Midtown festival — an array of high quality entertainment, from diverse cultures and styles, curated by maverick producer Don Was. This year (the 24th) seriously ups that ante with an international bent that skews toward some of the most innovative international music around. While primarily music, there are film and dance components, as well. Headliners include Nigeria’s patriarch of juju music, King Sunny Ade; reunited ’90s electronic alt-pop Japanese expat band Cibo Matto; and Don Was’ “Detroit All-Star Revue,” showcasing the 100 best Detroit songs. Various venues in midtown Detroit; concertofcolors.com; Free. July 15-16 Crash Detroit Here we have the third annual Crash Detroit fest. This innovative festival invites street bands from all over the country to come and perform at “underused” locations. Street bands are marching bands, parade bands — rowdy musical entertainment that spans the second line and Burning Man. All are unamplified,

mobile, and absolutely fun. The first day’s spread out over various locations. The second day takes place in Roosevelt Park, for a family-friendly event with tons of food, art, and music. July 15, various locations; visit crashdetroit.org and check social media for updates; July 16, Roosevelt Park, Detroit; starts at 2 p.m.; crashdetroit.org; Free. July 15-17 Pig & Whiskey This Metro Times summer festival featuring barbecue, whiskey, beer, and music is returning to downtown Ferndale. More than a dozen southeastern Michigan eateries will have their best pork, beef, and barbecue dishes available for purchase. Jay Ray, of Jay Ray’s BBQ, is returning to Pig & Whiskey for the second year. Of all the events he does, he said he enjoys this one the most. “It’s a great atmosphere, great music, and all great people that come down,” Ray says. Musical acts include Electric Six, the Beggars, and Stone Clover. Pig & Whiskey is from 6 p.m. to midnight on Friday, July 15; 11 a.m. to midnight on Saturday, July 16; and from 11 a.m. to 11 p.m. on Sunday, July 17 on East Troy Street in downtown Ferndale. Admission is free, but tickets must be purchased for drinks and food; all ages welcome. July 21-24 The Ann Arbor Art Fairs These days you’ll find art fairs by different names all over metro Detroit, but Ann Arbor’s is the largest and most historic, dating back to 1959. It’s actually four different fairs all under the same umbrella, featuring more than 1,000 juried artists, selling everything from crafts to fine arts to T-shirts, as well as children’s art, live chalk drawing, and more. Even if art isn’t your thing, we dare you to attend and tell us if your eyes get bored. Fairs run 10 a.m.-9 p.m. Thursday-Saturday, July 21-23, and noon-6 p.m. Sunday,

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F EATURE July 24; free and open to the public; for more information, see visitannarbor.org/ artfair. July 23-24 Mo Pop Want to hear the artists that all your favorite music blogs rave about? Look no further than Detroit’s own Mo Pop Music Festival. Located at the West Riverfront Park, this small yet niche lineup offers up something for everyone. You’ll hear music from electronic group M83, indie rockers Glass Animals, sisterly pop/rock trio Haim, and folk band the Head and the Heart. And don’t forget the food trucks, beer, and shopping from local crafters. The perfect festival for any metro Detroit hipster. July 23-24 at West Riverfront Park, 1801 W. Jefferson Ave. in Detroit. Visit mopopfestival.com for more information. Sundays all summer John’s Carpet House Back in the 1980s, John’s Carpet House was a juke joint run by John Estes. It had carpet tacked to every visible surface for soundproofing. The gathering moved outside when the house burned down, and after Estes died in 2006, Albert “Big

feature Pete” Barrow took over the weekly festival. It’s now held in a string of lots Barrow owns on the north side of Frederick between St. Aubin and Dubois, where live blues can draw hundreds of guests, who dance, picnic, and soak up music and sunshine. Barrow and other organizers don’t tolerate any nonsense, which means it’s a pleasant place for people to come together in a common love of music all summer long. Sunday afternoons at 2133 Frederick St., Detroit; see johnscarpethouse.com for more information. July 29-30 BFF Fest The Best Fest Forever Fest is an all-ages, super inclusive fest that was created to celebrate and promote Michigan’s diverse community music and arts scenes. Performers include Mother Cyborg, Best Exes, AM People, and Deadbeat Beat. By prioritizing the participation of women, LGBTQ, and people of color, BFF strives to be progressive, modern, and thoughtful in its curation. This is their third year, and the first in Southwest’s El Club; the weekend-long event is going to rule. 4114 W. Vernor Hwy., Detroit; seraphinecollective.org. Tickets are $12 per day in

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advance and $14 on the day of show. July 30-31 Maker Faire Detroit If “people who make things” sounds like an overly broad category for a fair, wait until you see the face-melting creations that have been on display at this local version of an international sensation: robots, fire-spitting metallic contraptions, moped racecourses, flying machines, exploding Coke bottles, and even a life-size Mouse Trap game. It also includes hands-on workshops and demonstrations that offer attendees the chance to meet the out-of-control nerds who create all this weird stuff. There’s also a hefty crafter component as well. Open 9:30 a.m.-6 p.m. both days, at the Henry Ford, 20900 Oakwood Blvd, Dearborn; see makerfairedetroit.com for more information. Second Saturdays, June-August Midtown Getdown The inaugural Midtown Getdown is a series of fests at the Majestic Theatre complex in the Cass Corridor. The free, all ages festival — held in the parking lot behind the Majestic — features five different band throughout each day,

plus craft beer tents, craft whiskey tents, art installations, local food vendors, and pop-up shops from artists and funky store owners. There’s even Deep House Yoga! The fest occurs on June 11, July 9, and Aug. 13; 4 p.m.- 10 p.m.; 4140 Woodward Ave.; midtowngetdown.com; Free. Aug. 6-7 Charivari Charivari Detroit returns to Belle Isle for its third year; it looks to be such an awesome party, with artists including Delano Smith, Eddie Fowlkes, Juan Atkins, Kai Alce, Terrence Parker, Ataxia, Golf Clap, DJ Godfather, the Detroit Techno Mafia and much more. This is a bit of a bittersweet event this year, as while it’s sure to be the highly affordable techno party’s biggest and best iteration, it’s the first since co-founder Steve Dunbar passed away in May. Belle Isle Park, Detroit; charivaridetroit.com; $25.

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n The Allied Media Conference is held at Wayne State University. Photo by Ara Howrani.

Summer fun in the D by MT staff Close your eyes for a second. Imagine the coldest of coldest winter days — we’re talking an icebox cold day. Now imagine a friend beckoning you to come with them on an adventure. “Let’s just meander around the city,” they tell you. Would you do it? Chances are — and we’re going off our own experience here, so maybe you’re a super adventurer — but chances are you’re going to say “No.” It’s too cold! The idea of stuffing your feet into thick socks and boots, grabbing a scarf, donning a jacket — it sort of kills spontaneity. Summer, however, is totally different. A friend wants to go on an adventure? Who isn’t game! With that in mind we present you with fun and affordable activities to try out this summer that will allow your inner adventurer to roam free. Have fun! The 18th Annual Allied Media Conference June 16-19 at Wayne State University Held each summer in Detroit, the Allied Media Conference is an opportunity for weirdos (we say this in the best possible way), geniuses, creatives, and media-makers to meet from around the globe. The conference typically attracts filmmakers, radio producers, technologists, youth organizers, writers, entrepreneurs, musicians, dancers, and artists — but is also cool enough that it doesn’t get bogged down in labels. If you’re an interesting and interested person, the conference is for you. Daytimes are spent attending sessions such as: “Say Her Name/Black Trans Lives Matter” and “Rebuilding Technology: Community Wireless Around the World.” Evenings are meant for partying and schmoozing with all your new friends.

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Standard ticket: $150, low-income reduced rate: $75. Little-known tip: Volunteer to work the event and admission to the conference and parties is free. Visit alliedmedia.org for more information. Coconut Babylon MotorCity Wine This island-style Detroit party, featuring DJs Monty Luke, Jeff Risk, and Daisuke Hughes, is free — but we can’t promise you won’t spend some dough. A festive gathering filled with good people, chill music, a glowing bonfire, and lots of dancing — it’s hard not to want to buy a bottle or two from the popular wine bar. 6 p.m.-2 a.m. on the last Sunday of each month at MotorCity Wine, 1949 Michigan Ave. in Detroit. Call 313-4837283 or visit motorcitywine.com for more information. Brightmoor Farmers & Artisan Market Brightmoor Artisans Cooperative Community Kitchen What better way to start off a summer weekend than a farmers market where you can stock up on delicious, freshly grown good? Accepting EBT and Double Up Food Books through September, this inclusive market aims to get healthy and clean food into your home. The Brightmoor Artisans Community Kitchen is at 22735 Fenkell Ave., in Detroit. Call 313-687-4463 for more information. Royal Oak Vintage Artisan Market Over 50 vendors are cramming into the Salvation Army Church parking lot on Saturday June 18, for a totally

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n The Allied Media Conference is held at Wayne State University. Photo by Ara Howrani.

groovy day of shopping and perusing. Find one of a kind, Michiganmade gems either for yourself or for friends. Vendors will include sellers of antiques, vintage wares, shabby chic furniture, jewelry, hand-lettered cards, ceramics, garden art and food. While admissions is free, a portion of the proceeds for sold goods will go towards the Salvation Army Women’s Ministries. 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Saturday, June 18 at 3015 N. Main St. in Royal Oak; free. Light Up the Riverfront Gabriel Richard Park Hosted by Rivière28 — a coalition within the Detroit RiverFront Conservancy — this barbecue aims to provide a fun and inviting social space for “active professionals who live, work or play in the city.” This is the group’s fifth annual Light Up the Riverfront event; however, it’s the first time they’ve hosted the event at the Gabriel Richard Park. The park is “one of the riverfront’s best-kept secret spots,” according to Riviere28. Even if you can’t make it to the barbecue — which is a BYOB-QUE — remember this location for future fun times this summer.

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6 p.m.-10 p.m. on Friday, June 17 at Gabriel Richard Park, 7400 E. Jefferson Ave., in Detroit; $25. Shakespeare in the Arb Nichols Arboretum Love’s Labor Lost, one of Shakespeare’s early comedies, is being directed by University of Michigan’s Residential College Drama faculty member Kate Mendeloff. The 2 ½-hour performance is sure to be like nothing you’ve ever seen, as audience members are asked to move through sections of the arboretum as the play progresses. This means the actors can take advantage of the vistas and valleys within the arb. This is the 15th year of this festive and fun play experience. 6:30 p.m. on Thursdays through Sundays, June 9-June 26; general admission is $20; students and youths 5-17, $10; seniors 62-and-up are $17. 1610 Washington Heights, Ann Arbor; call 734-647-7600 for more information.

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feature Summer festivals, whether they’re music-oriented or all about art, are a huge part of our Midwestern culture. We spend six months indoors, so when the weather turns, we want to enjoy every possible moment soaking up the sun and warm temps. But spending a day (or two or three) at an outdoor festival means you’ll need to pack an arsenal of essentials to keep comfortable. Read on and take notes. Backpack In our experience, a backpack is superior to other carrying cases for a number of reasons, included but not limited to its size and comfort level. In general, they’re also pretty unisex, so you and your S.O. can take turns carrying it.

n Photo by Liv Martin.

Summer festival survival kit

An experience-based guide to being fully prepared for anything and everything that can happen at an outdoor festival by Alysa Offman

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Baby wipes Of all the items on the list, this is the most essential. Did a bird just drop a hot, white shit on your arm? Grab a baby wipe. Is that makeup that you so ambitiously applied this morning dripping down your face? Grab a baby wipe. Is the porta-potty out of toilet paper? Grab a baby wipe. Did that

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n The best day of your life so far. Photo via Shutterstock. mustard-covered corn dog you paid $12 for make a mess of your hands? You get the picture.

a metro timeS GloSSy edition

coming this july SHOPPING • DRINK • CULTURE • ART • MUSIC • NIGHTLIFE

year-round market-wide circulation call your advertising representative (313) 961-4060 66 June June 8-14, 8-14, 2016 2016 || metrotimes.com 66 metrotimes.com

ing situations that could possibly arise are endless.

Halo charger (not pictured) Inevitably you’re going to be doing a lot of Snapchatting, Instagramming, and general internet documentation on this, the best day of your life. You cannot allow your lifeline to die.

Flip flops Your best bet is to wear comfortable flat sneakers and socks if you’re spending the day trekking around the grounds of an outdoor festival. But, sometimes those tootsies need to breathe. Pack a pair of flip flops and #FreeTheToes.

Empty water bottle For obvious reasons, festival attendees are often not permitted to bring in liquid. Pack an empty water bottle to avoid paying out the nose for hydration.

Sunscreen This one’s pretty self-explanatory. No one wants a sunburn. Or skin cancer.

Cigarettes (not pictured) Disclaimer: We do not condone or encourage the smoking of tobacco. But, if you’re going to get drunk and start feeling some kind of way, don’t be that person who tries to bum a smoke off those who pay $9 a pack. Chapstick For you, or to lend to those in need. Bandana Hair inevitably gets in the way at a summer festival. Pack a bandana to help tame the mane. Hand towel Especially if you’re a sweaty person by nature. Also, you could use it to hide … things … but you didn’t hear that from us. Small bandages Maybe those super cute flat white sneakers that you just bought are carving a crater in your heel. Or maybe you cut your finger on that $6 can of Bud Light. Or maybe you stepped on a bee. Really, the number of bandage-requir-

Ibuprofen If you started pregaming at 10 a.m., you might need to pop a few of these babies by 5 p.m. You know, preventative measures and everything. Ear plugs These are small and cheap, but they make a big difference. Like, the difference between having a hearing aid at age 40 and not having a hearing aid at age 40. Bring a few pairs and share with a friend. Deodorant Some of us have stronger body odor than others. Some of us are more comfortable with that odor. If you tend to produce a strong musk and prefer that your constituents aren’t subjected to the smell of sauteed onions all day, then pack (and reapply) your deodorant. Bubbles For funsies.

alysa@metrotimes.com @oh_miss_alysa

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n Townhouse. Photo by Scott Spellman.

Dining al fresco is the only way to go this summer by Serena Maria Daniels It’s officially hot AF, and the thought of spending another minute in your stuffy Hamtramck flat with A/C that’s on death row is unbearable (oops, sorry, that’s me). Regardless of where you live in metro Detroit, you’ve been dying to get out of the house and enjoy the warm summer breezes. That’s where outdoor dining comes in handy. Nourish your hunger, cool off with a refreshing cocktail, and remind yourself what the open air feels like again. Here are some spots throughout the metro whose patios are divine.

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Detroit La Dolce Vita This hidden Italian restaurant is famous for brunch, specifically brunch on its lovely garden patio, where you’ll spend an afternoon lounging about on warm summer days. 17546 Woodward Ave., Detroit; 313865-0331; ldvrestaurant.net HopCat You’ll find a massive beer list, creative bar food (hello Crack Fries), brunch, and regular live music acts. Plus, the outdoor, second-level patio

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F EATURE beer garden is one of those places you’ll want to sneak off to during a lively concert. 4265 Woodward Ave., Detroit; 313769-8828; hopcat.com/detroit Mudgie’s The popular eatery made a remarkable transformation over the past several months, including the addition of outdoor patio seating. So grab one of Mudgie’s famous giant sandwiches, choose from its great beer and wine list, and relax al fresco. 1300 Porter St., Detroit; 313-9612000; mudgiesdeli.com El Zocalo Order yourself a hearty plate of classic Tex Mex dishes and one of their big ol’ margaritas (choose from a huge selection of tequilas) and sit on the gorgeous garden patio out back. It’ll make for the ideal afternoon siesta from adulting. 3400 Bagley Ave., Detroit; 313-8413700; elzocalodetroit.net Selden Standard You already love the exquisitely executed small plates here, prepared with locally sourced ingredients. The drink menu is also out of this world. The outdoor patio, though, takes your dining experience at this lauded eatery to the next level. Oh, and did we mention brunch is served here as well? 3921 2nd Ave., Detroit; 313-438-5055; seldenstandard.com Motor City Brewing Works This Detroit-based brewery and pizzeria also happens to have one of the best rooftop patios in Midtown. So when you’re looking for that ideal summer breeze, nights out on this patio are stellar. 470 W. Canfield St., Detroit; 313-8322700; motorcitybeer.com Imperial If you’ve ever spent much time in Los Angeles, then the concept at Imperial makes a lot of sense. Lots of Mexican-inspired street food to choose from, with a rotating selection of tacos (veggie-friendly, too). Plus, there’s a large variety of tequila and mezcal-based cocktails and margaritas. Top it off with a chill patio, and you got that West Coast vibe on lock. 22828 Woodward Ave., Ferndale; 248850-8060

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feature Northern Lights Lounge You might have gone here to take in a live show, grab a drink with friends, or have a bite of yummy bar food. The huge patio takes all that and gives you one of the most laid-back, enjoyable outdoor venues in the city. 660 W. Baltimore St., Detroit; 313873-1739; northernlightslounge.com The Skip Enter the mural-laden the Belt alleyway between Broadway and Library off Gratiot, and you’ll find this sleek, new outdoor bar featuring frozen margaritas, a large beer selection, and a clandestine, hidden feel. 1234 Library St., Detroit Townhouse Detroit This sprawling space downtown has a glass-enclosed, outdoor “house,” making patio seating available yearround. When weather permits, it’s opened up to give you a nice, airy feel. This loud, splashy establishment also features a number of bars — including a whiskey lounge and seafood raw bar — an open kitchen, fire pit, and lounge seating. 500 Woodward Ave., Detroit; 313-7231000; eatattownhouse.com Central Kitchen + Bar This relaxed, contemporary eatery is strong in its upgraded gastropub fare and interesting cocktail list. Its open design, with an adjoining street side patio offers a great view of Cadillac Square. 660 Woodward Ave. No. 4A, Detroit; 313-963-9000; centraldetroit.com Old Miami This is your quintessential neighborhood dive bar, replete with Vietnam and vintage rock memorabilia throughout, as well as cheap drinks. The best part is the giant back yard, complete with a tiki-style bar, plenty of lawn chairs and benches, and often a hot dog stand to dig into when you get the beer munchies. 3930 Cass Ave., Detroit; 313-831-3830 1917 American Bistro This place on Detroit’s Avenue of Fashion is especially known for its brunch, has a full bar and an eclectic menu with Cajun influences, and rooftop seating — perfect for keeping the brunch vibe going all afternoon. 19496 Livernois Ave., Detroit; 313863-1917; 1917americanbistro.com

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n The Skip. Photo by Chris and Michelle Gerard.

The Rattlesnake Club This fine-dining staple offers seasonal dishes featuring locally grown produce, prime certified Angus beef, and non-farmed finfish and shellfish. The bar features fine wines and Michigan craft beers. Oh, and it’s situated on the Detroit River, making for a delightful view of the Windsor skyline. 300 River Place Dr., Detroit; 313-5674400; rattlesnakedetroit.com Sky Deck Detroit Opera House The Sky Deck sits atop the Detroit Opera House and is open on a first-come, first-serve basis for Tigers games, giving guests a full view. The Sky Deck has a full bar and offers ballpark fare like hot dogs, hamburgers, and chicken wings. 1526 Broadway, Detroit; 313-2873284; detroitoperahouseskydeck.com

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Sindbad’s Sindbad’s offers plenty of seafood dishes, soups, and chilis, as well as handhelds like sandwiches. The drink menu offers fine wine and craft beers. Plus, that deck overlooking the marina gives you a prime view of the Detroit River. 100 St. Clair St., Detroit; 313-8228000; sindbads.com The suburbs Brownie’s on the Lake Brownie’s on the Lake is another seafood mecca and also offers up a fine USDA prime beef. The restaurant, bar, and patio all have a nautical vibe, plus a comfortable atmosphere with stunning views of Lake St. Clair. 24214 Jefferson Ave., St. Clair Shores; 586-445-8080; browniesonthelake.com

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n Imperial. Courtesy photo.

Republica This small but popular gastropub offers a selection of craft beers and cocktails, Greek and Mediterranean cuisine, as well as chop house classics like ribs, a pork chop sandwich, and fish and chips. Enjoy all that on a spacious, covered outdoor patio. 1999 Coolidge Hwy., Berkley; 248268-3175; republicaberkley.com Social Kitchen Social Kitchen has the New Americana game mastered, with creative comfort food dishes like the grilled cheese on naan, falafel, and a sizable variation of a classic Reuben. And when you hit the beautifully appointed rooftop lounge, you’re in for a fine view of Maple and Old Woodward. 225 E. Maple Rd., Birmingham; 248594-4200; socialkitchenandbar.com Red Fox English Pub Dig into some classic British pub chow, take a swig of brew, and cozy up next to one of many individual fire pits atop comfy seating on this rooftop lounge for a late night snack. 100 S. Main St., Royal Oak; 248-5434300; redfoxenglishpub.com

Arbor Brewery Co. This cheerful Ann Arbor brewpub serves up house-brewed suds and upscale pub food — all offered up on a street side patio. Great for people watching. 114 E. Washington St., Ann Arbor; 734-213-1393; arborbrewing.com Aut Bar Spread out at this spot’s quiet courtyard and enjoy a leisurely weekend brunch, with standouts like its Mexican specialties (breakfast burritos and huevos motulenos). If you’re over 21, head up the second level for some adult beverages. 15 Braun Ct., Ann Arbor; 734-9943677; autbar.com Portofino This fine riverfront eatery offers a menu of Italian cuisine and seafood, as well as a selection of wines and a full-service bar. This time of year is perfect for dining on the patio or cruise the river on Portofino’s U.S. Coast Guard-approved vessel, the Friendship. 3455 Biddle Ave., Wyandotte; 734281-6700; portofinoontheriver.com

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n The Camp Bil-O-Wood waterfront in Blind River, Ontatio. Photo by Jack Roskopp.

Why I’m thankful my parents sent me to summer camp And why you should send your children, too by Jack Roskopp Being sent away to summer camp was already written in the stars for me. My grandparents sent my dad to a co-ed summer camp in Blind River, Ontario, called Camp Bil-O-Wood. A small camp tucked into the Canadian wilderness, my dad spent every summer there for two months until he was a counselor in college, and some years after that, too. I spent my first summer at Bil-OWood when I was 11. I had one friend I knew up there and I was going to be away from my parents and sister for an entire month. Yeah, that’s right. An entire month. This wasn’t just some one-week stint where I wouldn’t even have enough time to break out of my shell. This was a whole month of living in a rustic cabin with 10 other boys and our college-aged counselors (looking back, they seemed so much older). So not only did I have to learn to live with complete strangers, but I had to learn how to deal with a crisis without having the comfort of my mom and dad to figure out my problems. The summer camp bug hit me, and

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it hit me hard. I slowly turned into a two-month camper. (I know, people. Two freckin’ months.) Once I hit my late high school/early college days, I turned into a junior counselor, assistant counselor, and then full-fledged counselor to a cabin of 12-year-old boys, and I was able to give back to a camp that gave me so much. So here are a few reasons why going to summer camp shaped my life and turned me into an independent, semi-functioning 20-something. The biggest draw that keeps the campers at Bil-O-Wood coming back is their outdoor education program. Northern Ontario is known for its well-traveled lakes and rivers, and my camp uses that gift to teach not only outdoor skills, but independence and self-confidence. I can’t tell you how many times I was on a canoe trip and I wanted nothing more than to go home and enjoy the comforts of air conditioning laziness. As I got older, the canoe trips grew in intensity, and so did my love/hate relationship for the trips. I hated the paddling, the portaging,

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It seems that every parent on social media writes about how they want to give their children the best childhood, a childhood better than their own. If you’re reading this and that is the case, then send your kid to sleepaway camp. collecting firewood — but the second we made it to our campsite, finished the portage, or had the fire started and burgers grilling, I was happy. I was proud of myself for accomplishing something instead of wasting my summers away at home. How many times in your childhood can you remember actually being genuinely proud of yourself? Feeling accomplished and having goals? It happened to me every day at summer camp. I also learned a lot of communication skills during my time at camp. When you live in a small cabin and share this space with other people, communication and helping each other is a key element to succeeding as a functioning unit. We had to help each other clean the cabin every morning, eat meals together, and participate in activities as a team. Sure, being in a school setting is very similar, and they teach you a lot of the same things, but when you’re with the same people 24 hours a day for two months, you learn how to be an effective communicator. If my bunk mate wasn’t respecting my space, I had to learn how I could communicate my wants and needs as well as respecting theirs. It’s a unique experience for kids to learn, and prepared me when it was time to move into my freshman dorm in college. While all my friends from high school were nervous about living with a stranger for the first time, I thought it was a walk in the park. Now, I know that I am extremely

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lucky and beyond privileged that my parents knew that it was a good idea to send me to sleep-away summer camp and could actually afford it. Summer camp is not cheap by any means, but I think my parents knew how beneficial it was to me when the most depressing part of my summer was the day that camp was finished. The friends that I met will last me a lifetime (I know this because my dad still hangs out with his buddies from camp), and the memories are some of the best ones I have. It seems that every parent on social media writes about how they want to give their children the best childhood, a childhood better than their own. If you’re reading this and that is the case, then send your kid to sleep-away camp. Even if it’s for two weeks (Camp Bil-O-Wood offers that now too), your child will learn so much about themselves that it’s insane. Plus, the blow that your child is leaving home for the first time when they go off to college will soften a bit — just ask my mom and dad. For more information on Camp BilO-Wood, go to bil-o-wood.com, or visit their Facebook page at facebook.com/ bilowood.

letters@metrotimes.com @metrotimes

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n The Detroit Ultimate Frisbee League. Photo by Ara Howrani of Howrani Studios.

Catch the spirit

Detroit embraces Ultimate Frisbee, the disc sport catching fire on college campuses by Jon Akers You might not realize it, but one of the fastest growing sports in the country involves a Frisbee. It’s called “Ultimate Frisbee,” and it’s already popular on college campuses nationwide. The sport is breaking out nationally, with two professional leagues, and locally, with Detroit’s own pro team, Detroit Mechanix. Internationally, Ultimate Frisbee has even won a bid for inclusion in the Olympics. (Full disclosure: This writer has been involved in league play for several years.) Requiring little more than a flying disc and a group of motivated people, it’s no wonder why the sport is taking off the way it is. It combines the pure athleticism of almost all sports with a few unique features, such as a selfgoverning set of rules known as “Spirit of the Game,” which can be found at every level of play, from the grassroots levels of pickup and summer leagues all the way to the pros. “The integrity of Ultimate depends on each player’s responsibility to uphold the Spirit of the Game, and this responsibility should remain paramount,” states the website of USA Ultimate, the sport’s domestic governing body. That “spirit” is the philosophy that holds the sport together and keeps it competitive and fun. The concept is that because there

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are no referees, players themselves are responsible for following and enforcing the rules. Mutual respect between players should never be sacrificed for more competitive play, and vice versa. Basically, this means having good sportsmanship all the time. Or in other words, treat others the way you would want to be treated. These qualities are often left in the dust in most competitive sports where winning is at the forefront of everyone’s mind. Spirit of the Game is really what makes Ultimate unique, and combined with its simple structure, this sport is playable virtually anywhere by anyone, including the historic Fort Wayne in Southwest Detroit. The Detroit Ultimate Frisbee League, or DUFL, was founded by volunteers in 2013 as a summer league, and has since expanded to include a fall league as well. The group meets once a week in the evenings at Fort Wayne for a pregame clinic for newcomers, followed by a league game. “We decided we didn’t want to drive to Ann Arbor to play Ultimate, and we’re also in community development, which means we’re in the business of boosting Detroit,” says founding secretary Samira Guyot. DUFL’s volunteers and players alike have been working to create stronger ties between the

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n Photo by Ara Howrani of Howrani Studios. greater Ultimate community and the local Detroit community. “It’s always something we’re working to improve,” founding president Elizabeth Luther says. “It’s hard, you’re going to run a lot … but we always stress being beginnerfriendly. We’ve found that if we have the right spirit, in the right community, people are happy to play,” Guyot says. She describes how the lines between formal and informal leaders start to blur when people of varying skill levels volunteer and are working toward a common goal. “We do a lot of evaluating and responding to feedback so people feel like their voice is being heard,” she says. Inclusivity is a priority for DUFL, which is just one aspect that has helped it grow over the few years it’s been around. And from that momentum, local club teams have begun to form, which really speaks to the Ultimate community in Detroit. Legitimate open, women’s, and mixed teams are forming at all levels of play, giving people the opportunity to find where they fit at varying levels of competition and commitment. At the professional level, the Detroit Mechanix are growing to be a competitive program in the American Ultimate Disc League while still keeping the “Spirit of the Game” alive, and also working to spread the spirit throughout the metro Detroit community. Founded in 2010, the Mechanix are one of the oldest organizations in professional Ultimate. “We really want the Mechanix to be a vehicle for the community to interact with one another. At the end of the day that’s what the Mechanix stand for. Not just the Detroit or ultimate communities, but we’ve also made

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international connections with players from Austria, Denmark, Colombia, Canada, Japan … community is where you are even if it’s not your home,” says owner Brent Steepe. The best part about ultimate, Steepe says, is how it is “not inherently exclusionary. Rich can play with poor, women with men, any race. … It really brings out the integrity of individuals.” The Mechanix plan is really to combine things in a meaningful way. Steepe emphasizes how Ultimate is a readily accessible sport for kids, and with other athletic and extracurricular opportunities going down and costs going up, added on top of growing health issues among youth, the Mechanix jump at every opportunity to engage with different communities. Their next home game on June 25 will benefit Operation Smile, an international and volunteer-based medical charity providing free surgery for children and young adults in developing countries who are born with facial deformities. The Mechanix have two more home games and four away games left in the season. Their home turf is Bishop Foley High School, and all BFHS students get in for free with an ID. See detmechanix. com for the full schedule. For more about DUFL, see detroitultimate.org. Those interested in trying out the game can find groups that meet weekly in Southfield, Troy, Dearborn, and Ferndale by searching for pick-up games in each community on Facebook. John Akers is a Metro Times intern.

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n Beeler Farms pork shoulder entree. Photo by Scott Spellman.

Starting fresh at Craft Work by Serena Maria Daniels The challenge for any restaurant, particularly a popular one, is to keep things fresh. If you’ve got a good thing going, it’s easy to grow stagnant, to go into autopilot, or grow bored. Who suffers? The customer who’s served the uninspired entree, the back-of-the-house crew experiencing restlessness, and ultimately the restaurateur who’s invested in the business.

gain his bearings made sense. Plus, he knew Dalton and was initially interested in helping out at Craft Work. That supporting capacity became a leading role unexpectedly, and he and the reworked crew have been updating the menu ever since. What he walked into is a handsomely designed, 110-seat interior with deep woods and lots of natural light, giving it an inviting 8047 Agnes St., Detroit | 313-469-0976 ambiance, and paired with a popular happy hour, craftworkdetroit.com Sunday brunch, and solid Entrees $9-market prices drink menu. Diners also 4 p.m.-11 p.m. Monday-Tuesday, 4 p.m.-midnight Wednesday-Saturday, flock to the place for famil11 a.m.-3 p.m. Sunday brunch | Handicap accessible iar comfort foods with a twist like the fried chicken. What was lacking was the freshness that That’s why a good shakeup is someDetroiters are increasingly starting to times in order: new eyes to refine the expect from newer restaurants. menu and address any shortcomings. With his background in green PortEarlier this spring, that’s what occurred land, Solley has begun to change that, at Craft Work. Co-owner and chef Matt starting with the sourcing of ingredients. Dalton departed with business partner Produce comes from urban farms like Hubert Yaro just over two years after the Fisheye, around the corner from the duo opened the West Village spot. After restaurant, while meats come from an his exit, much of the kitchen staff was exclusive deal the restaurant has with the either shuffled into new positions or Food Shed Exchange, a local meat and removed. In his place is chef Aaron Solfish supplier. Solley has also been startley, who comes to us from dining haven ing to explore composting and recycling Portland, Ore. options, which are plentiful in the West Solley had a shakeup of his own when he separated from the co-owner (both his Coast city, but not so much yet here. As for the menu, only that fried chicken business partner and girlfriend) of James and a tempura chicken salad remain from John Café, a breakfast and lunch eatery the previous offerings, though the dredge in Portland’s St. Johns neighborhood. He mix is now made in-house instead of previously lived in Detroit in the aughts with a pre-made mix. Bacon used in the (when he worked at Opus One, Tribute, entree’s braised greens is also prepared and Papa Joe’s), so returning in April to

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in the kitchen, as opposed to buying it elsewhere, as are the cured and smoked meats that can be found on the meat and cheese plate. Solley and team also pull from the area’s robust Middle Eastern culinary traditions, with dishes like the Labneh Harissa creamy cheese that spreads nicely on Holbrook Market bread; the Bangs Island mussels, which come in a spicy red coconut curry sauce; and the veggiefriendly roasted beets and carrots with tahini, lentils, walnut tabbouleh, and lemon. The menu still features a couple of meat dishes, but now you know where the protein comes from. There’s the popular Beeler Farms pork shoulder with Asian slaw, soy, mirin, yuzu, and Sriracha sauce, and a Creekstone Farms New York strip (rubbed in sea salt and cracked pepper and served a la carte). Seafood is also again offered, but instead of having dishes like grilled trout from Wisconsin on the menu daily, the current fresh catch calls for finding whatever’s best at the moment. On a recent visit, we ordered a 6-ounce, seared Alaskan wild salmon, served with morels. At $35 a plate, it was by far the most expensive meal, but we delighted in the lightly crisp exterior of the salmon and umamirich seasonal mushrooms. Two new burgers have also been added, the Le Big Mack Ave — made in an upscale Golden Arches vein, with two Angus patties, shredded lettuce, house pickles, onion, special sauce, and fries — and the Wagyu burger ($15), made

with dry aged Wagyu and bacon patty, mayo, house pickles, and fries. The Le Big Mack Ave (get it, Pulp Fiction fans?) is offered on both the regular dinner menu at $9, as well as the happy hour offerings (adding to what our readers say is the best place for food during happy hour) for $6. The taco del dia, or taco of the day, and meat and veggie skewers have both been added to Craft Work’s happy hour fare in recent months, with nothing priced at more than $6. Dessert has also been changed up, with an appealing strawberry rhubarb kuchen dreamed up by sous chef Stephen Schmidt, who’s been helping along the way throughout the transition (coffee cake, roasted rhubarb, fresh strawberries, whipped cream, and sugar crunch). We also dug into a Solley creation, the peanut butter pie made with peanut butter mousse, ganache, and a chocolate graham crust. It had us thinking of either a giant Reese’s or a Butterfinger. In the world of restaurants, we know it can get tumultuous. In our growing scene in Detroit, we’ve seen a number of lauded eateries experience dramatic shakeups that are often hard to recover from. The trick is learning to roll with it, drawing from the good, and learning from the difficulties. Craft Work seems to have pulled off a smooth transition thus far, and we look forward to what’s to come.

E sdaniels@metrotimes.com L@serenamaria36

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E at

Bites

Skip into summer

n The Skip. Photo by Chris and Michelle Gerard. Patio drinking completes the summer experience, and for that, the Skip bar officially opened June 2. This is the latest endeavor from the folks who brought us Standby bar and restaurant, which sits on Gratiot Avenue at the corner of the Belt Alley. The difference here is the airy, outdoor-like feel. The tiny spot is tucked away in a nook in the alley and is accented with splashy murals, including a Shepard Fairey piece, “Pattern of Destruction.” The Skip also offers a much shorter drink list than the larger adjacent spot, with more of an emphasis on beer. The cocktail menu, designed by partner/ beverage director Joe Rob (Robinson), includes: frozen cucumber margaritas,

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daiquiris made with Plantation 3 Stars rum and house-made lime cordial, boilermakers like Tecate with Ancho Reyes chili liquor, and more than 20 beers. All drinks range from $3-$8. Patio seating extending into the alley is in the works, as is a food menu consisting of “Latin American street food” (so, tacos, elote, pupusas, empanadas? It’s anyone’s guess at the moment). The kickoff came after a number of soft openings for Opening Day and Memorial Day weekend. It also follows recent reports that partner-chef Brendon Edwards exited Standby with little notice. In his place are co-chefs Jesse Knott (aka Corktown Jesse) and Lind-

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E at say Salminen, who last week unveiled a revamped menu at the eatery. The Skip, at 1234 Library St. (in the Belt between Broadway and Library) is open 3 p.m.-midnight WednesdaySaturday and noon-8 p.m. Sunday, and closed Monday and Tuesday. The Conserva takes over former Torino space Chef Matthew Baldridge has his hands full, what with opening (with his business partners) the new Atomic Chicken takeout spot in Clawson, working on the build-out of a second location in New Center, oh, and getting married to Janna Coumoundouros. Nonetheless, the former Cliff Bell’s and Rattlesnake cook (more recently he and Coumoundouros have been hosting popular pop-ups under the Dinner Club name) continues to plug away to open the Conserva, an Italianinspired concept in which diners are served a variety of meats, seafood, pickled vegetables, mustards, and aioli jars. The original plan for this eatery was to open in an old bank building on Nine Mile in Ferndale. Seems the plans have changed. In a recent announcement for a Dinner Club pop-up later this month, Baldridge said Conserva is headed for another address: 201 E. Nine Mile Rd. That address may be a familiar one for foodies around here. It’s the former location of the much-lauded Torino The wildly popular, high-end eatery abruptly shuttered last year when the Oakland County Health Department determined the space was too small for the menu. Its chef, Garrett Lipar, went on to Marais in Grosse Pointe and was also nominated for a James Beard Award. The Dinner Club pop-ups will serve as a test for a few of the Conserva products. Two seatings are planned for June 18, in which diners will be served a five-course dinner with wine pairings and cash bar. Tickets go for $65. RZA, Ghostface Killah spotted at Detroit Vegan Soul Who knew RZA was a vegan? Well, any Wu-Tang fan for sure, but we were excited (and a bit surprised) when we saw he and Ghostface Killah made a stop at Detroit vegan hotspot Detroit Vegan Soul on Sunday, May 29. RZA performed at Movement on May 28, and the restaurant posted a photo showing the happy customers, stating the duo loved the “catfish”

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Bites tofu, a dish made of cornmeal battered tofu, broccoli/corn medley, redskin potatoes, and onion. RZA has been passionate about going vegan and recently started encouraging fans to follow in his footsteps. He detailed the reasons behind his decision to go vegan in an interview with PETA. We’re not surprised the pair was spotted at Detroit Vegan Soul, which has drawn fanfare from vegans and meat eaters alike. The good news: There’s another location in the works. BLAC Detroit reports that DVS is expanding to a second location in Detroit’s Grandmont-Rosedale area, in the former Blue Moon Ice Cream shop near the new Pages Bookshop. No word yet on when the second location opens. Sugar House gets a nod from Esquire We always get stoked when we hear about a local spot that gets national acclaim. So when we saw Sugar House mentioned in an Esquire article about the best bars in America, we were pretty excited. The magazine posted late last month what it considers the 18 best bars in the country. “Drinks correspondent” David Wondrich writes of the cross-country investigation: “In 2005, my editors at Esquire came up with the idea of putting together a list of America’s best bars — not the best new cocktail bars or sports bars or brunch bars or whatever, but the best bars irrespective of type.” High up on the list were your typical Brooklyn, N.Y., Portland, Ore., and San Francisco, but also surprises like Cincinnati, Baltimore, and Buffalo, N.Y. Also mentioned was Detroit’s own Sugar House. OK, so the watering hole did not make the top 18, but it did receive a shoutout in the “cocktails and hospitality” category. Though the Corktown bar is serious about drink-making, it’s playful in its offerings, often mixing up the menu for seasonal themes (this summer, it’s all about tiki everything, and last fall the bar was recast as Bill Murray). With that balance of serious cocktail crafting and a fun, ever-changing vibe, we can’t say we’re surprised by the recognition.

letters@metrotimes.com @metrotimes

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D RINK

drinkup

Dirty Blonde | Atwater

4.2% ABV | 10 IBU Atwater is known as one of the top craft breweries in metro Detroit. Their Vanilla Java Porter, Detroit Pale Ale, and Grand Circus IPA are considered standards, and without them no craft beer bar is complete. Atwater’s Dirty Blonde wheat ale might be their most well-known brew. The citrus-y brew is a middle ground between Blue Moon and Shock Top, it’s light and not too sweet, and lacks any unpleasant mouth-puckering bitterness. It’s available year-round, but we particularly enjoy this beer during a summer evening on the patio. While this is the type of brew we best enjoy sipping straight out of the bottle, if you do choose to pour it into a glass you’ll get a light, straw-colored liquid with very little head. The flavor is very light, slightly sweet, and fruity thanks to the crushed orange peel that’s added during the brewing process. A take on the traditional German-style Kolsch beer, it’s also made with wheat, which gives it a distinctive crispness.

If you’re a regular Dirty Blonde drinker, you might notice the label is different. Atwater is undergoing a rebranding that includes new labels drawn by Detroit artist Tony Roko, giving this beer even more local flavor. Fun fact: Celebrity chef and star of The Chew, Mario Batali, recently posted that Atwater’s Dirty Blonde Ale is his new favorite Michigan beer. Celebrity endorsement, what?

letters@metrotimes.com @metrotimes

7 YEARS RUNNING

PATIO NOW OPEN

2010 • 2011 • 2012 • 2013 • 2014 • 2015 HOURS: MON-WED 11AM-9PM | THURS-SAT 11AM-11PM | SUN (BRUNCH) 10AM-3PM

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D RINK

raisethebar

n Photo by Meghan Martini. Courtesy of Stockyard Handcrafted Goods.

Handmade

Stockyard Handcrafted Goods by Alysa Offman Stockyard Handcrafted Goods quietly opened their doors for the first time Feb. 22. The family-owned restaurant had no grand opening celebration or special announcement to the public, yet the place has been packed since that winter day. The bar and restaurant is owned by 25-year-old Robby Gjokaj, a lifelong resident of Lake Orion whose family owns and operates the Ox Bar and Grill in downtown Oxford. “We all grew up in the restaurant industry,” says general manager Pashka Micakaj. Gjokaj and Micakaj are cousins whose fathers first ran restaurants and then built them. Now the two, along with brothers, sisters, and other cousins, are working to make a new generation of restaurants successful. In three shorts months, Stockyard has become popular among locals, attracting beer lovers with their impressively long tap list. The place boasts 100 craft taps

shop to help open Stockyard. He works diligently to ensure the ingredients for their barbecue, sandwiches, tacos, soups, and salads are bought locally. With things solidified with the dinner menu, Micakaj says Crawford is working on lunch and brunch menus that will ensure Stockyard can open for business earlier in the day. As for now, it’s dinner service only. Behind the bar, manager Harmony Albright whips up special shrubs, infused moonshine, flavored bourbon, and craft cocktails. The craft cocktails menu has a 10 to 12 standard drinks and she constantly mixes up new ones. “She’s like a mad scientist behind the bar,” Micakaj says of Albright. With things moving in the right direction inside, Gjokaj and Micakaj are readying their outdoor seating area for a July 4 opening. The patio’s aesthetic will contrast slightly from Stockyard’s interior,

Stockyard Handcrafted Goods 305 S. Broadway St., Lake Orion; 248-783-7300; stockyardhandcraftedgoods.com

Open: 4 p.m.-11 p.m. Monday-Thursday, 4 p.m.-midnight Friday, noon to midnight Saturday, noon to 10 p.m. Sunday

and Micakaj says 90 percent of those are Michigan made. “For beer lovers, it’s the best place to go in Oakland County,” she says. And the love of craft extends far beyond the beer list here. In fact, the place got its name because everything from the beer to the food to the tables and chairs to the bar is handmade and sourced locally. “The whole bar, the tables and chair — everything — was made by hand,” Micakaj says. On top of that, the materials were sourced from salvage yards in Detroit where hardware, ironwork, and wood were purchased to create Stockyard’s beautiful 161-seat interior. The menu is crafted by executive chef Steve Crawford, who left Union Wood-

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with firepits and lounge-y couches, but the full bar and food menu will be available al fresco. For metro Detroiters who live at the southern end of Wayne County, Lake Orion might seem like a hike, but the truth is that Stockyard is only about nine miles north of the Palace of Auburn Hills and maybe 20 minutes away from DTE Energy Music Theatre, so if you’re heading out to enjoy a blockbuster concert this summer, we highly suggest you check out Stockyard Handcrafted Goods while you’re at it.

D letters@metrotimes.com L@metrotimes

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feature

n FLAG, from left to right: Dez Cadena, Stephen Egerton, Bill Stevenson, Chuck Dukowski, and Keith Morris. Photo courtesy of Biz 3 publicity.

Capture the FLAG

Keith Morris on growing up in punk, and his autobiography ‘My Damage’

Music

Drink

Eat

What’s Going On

Big Story

News

Upfront

M usic

Classifieds

Culture

Arts

Watch

by Adam Woodhead Historians of punk — and rock music more generally — often compartmentalize genre styles using both geography and chronology. The Los Angeles punk scene, for instance, is typically divided into Hollywood, the South Bay, East LA, Orange County, and beyond. It’s often said that the violence of hardcore music created a schism in the LA punk scene of the late ’70s, and maybe the music can be said to inhabit different worlds entirely: one populated by infectious hooks and throwbacks to classic Americana, where we’re out there having fun in the warm California sun; and a separate one in which the man behind the California sound is actually tortured by psychotic episodes, and spends his free time hanging out with Charles Manson. The music, art, and what has sometimes been described as the

movement associated with the band Black Flag belongs to that second world. The band’s own history is often divided up by singer. In 1979, they released their first EP, titled Nervous Breakdown, which served almost as a manifesto. The single featured some of the greatest songwriting by guitarist and chief architect Greg Ginn, as well as classic album design by his brother Raymond Pettibon, who would go on to produce not only Black Flag’s logo and the majority of their artwork, but iconic covers for the likes of the Minutemen and Sonic Youth. The incredible third ingredient on Nervous Breakdown is the singing of Keith Morris, who reportedly showed up to play the drums, until coaxed into vocals by Ginn. Morris’ vocal work is perhaps the

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most distinctive of any of the Black Flag singers, a sound that some have likened to the whiney snarl of Johnny Rotten. Every fan of Black Flag has their favorite vocalist. But the fact remains that the magic formula that came together on Nervous Breakdown produced a masterpiece. After touring around California and recording Nervous Breakdown — along with a handful of other classic Black Flag tracks that would not resurface until 1982’s double LP Everything Went Black — Morris left the band to form his own hardcore supergroup, the Circle Jerks. The Circle Jerks would appear alongside Black Flag and their new singer Ron Reyes in Penelope Spheeris’ The Decline of Western Civilization Part I, which immortalized the names and faces of the LA punk scene on the silver screen. Reyes would be eventu-

ally be succeeded by Dez Cadena, and finally Henry Rollins, who would find fame and fortune not only in his postmusical acting career, but also in telling the story of Black Flag to readers and audiences around the world. After their breakup in 1986, the band remained inactive for almost three decades, until a watershed moment for Black Flag’s music came in 2006. That year, normal teenagers across America were tuning in to watch one of Fox’s most popular prime-time dramas, The OC. Actor Adam Brody’s character had been rejected from the college of his choice, and adopted a bleak, almost nihilistic outlook on his prospects for the future. The scene opens with Brody alone in his room, so despondent and hopeless that the once upstanding young citizen has taken to smoking marijuana. The song he is listening

M usic

to is one whose lyrics were penned by Morris, an early tune originally hailing from before Black Flag’s first recording session when the band called themselves Panic. It was “Wasted,” from Nervous Breakdown. The use of punk and hardcore music in mainstream American media like The OC is significant, or at least interesting, for a number of reasons. It illustrates the extent to which the music itself has become synonymous with the angst, anxiety, and malaise of adolescence. But also, it marks a renewed popular interest that may spell good news for casual and dedicated fans alike. Sure enough, in 2009 Morris formed OFF! — his second band to share its name with a popular brand of insecticide. OFF! blended the sound of early Black Flag with some of Morris’ favorite proto-punk acts, and was also accompanied by original artwork from Pettibon. Then, in early 2013, Ginn announced that Black Flag had re-formed with a lineup that featured Reyes on vocals. And shortly after, Morris announced his own intention to perform the songs of Black Flag with former members Dez Cadena on guitar, Bill Stevenson on drums, longtime bass player Chuck Dukowski, and their friend Stephen Egerton of the Descendents filling in as lead guitarist. The group performs under the name FLAG. The night before I speak to Morris on the phone, his friends John Doe and Exene Cervenka of the band X appear on

feature

NPR’s Fresh Air. The pair are promoting their new book Under the Big Black Sun, a self-described “personal history of LA punk,” which features chapters by Henry Rollins, Jane Wiedlin of the Go Go’s, and Mike Watt of the Minutemen, among others. Morris is quick to direct my attention to a photo of himself alongside Black Flag members Ginn and Dukowski, which appears midway through the book. But Keith’s story behind the photo does not appear within the pages of Under the Big Black Sun. “What happens is, after we get through with the photo shoot, Greg says something to Chuck, or somebody says something to somebody else,” Morris says. “And Chuck ends up getting pushed through one of the big plate glass windows. This was up on Hollywood Boulevard in front of Frederick’s of Hollywood, where your gal pal would go to get some lingerie and negligee and things that would turn you on and stimulate you, all of those fun things.” Morris’ own memoir is called My Damage: The Story of a Punk Rock Survivor, and is set for release from Da Capo on Aug. 30. The book is co-authored by Southern California writer Jim Ruland, a longtime contributor to Razorcake, as well as the now-defunct and revered LA punk ’zine Flipside. The book’s title refers not only to Black Flag’s music, but to the toll Morris’ career has taken on him, as throughout our conversation he references a number of medical conditions including diabetes, and problems

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M usic with his lumbar spine and respiratory system. “I have emphysema,” he says. “I already smoked all the weed I’m destined to smoke.” The harsh realities of a failing body and nervous system are one of the many factors that can complicate things later in life. And one of the ideas I am most interested in talking to aging punk legends about is how their attitudes change. While the public’s perception of punk has undoubtedly shifted, it’s unclear how much that shift has to do with the audience, or the musicians themselves. Writer Chuck Klosterman (who ironically, has never been interested in punk) was one of the first I heard talk meaningfully about the idea of authenticity — the extent to which young people are

feature “If you were to go to a party, we would be the last ones that anyone would talk to except for the rest of the nerds that were there. It’s kind of like Sixteen Candles: We were all working jobs we didn’t want to work. Some of us were struggling in the female department. All of the stuff had been part of the ingredients to what we created. Consequently, the music was very angry. It was like we were lashing out. We weren’t rocking out to get laid. We weren’t rocking out to score drugs. We weren’t rocking out to be the popular guys. We were lashing out at all of the people that had pointed their fingers at us ... We didn’t know any better.” Likewise, he offers a similar explanation for Black Flag’s famously relentless work ethic. “We didn’t know about

In a year when Kanye West’s latest album was canned by some critics for its misogyny, it is interesting to consider how songs like the Rollins-era “Slip It In” would be received today. preoccupied with remaining authentic. As we age, and we accept that we will have to accommodate the world around us, this tends to become progressively less important. The music of Black Flag is perhaps some of the most “real,” visceral music ever produced, to the degree that it is almost difficult to listen to anything else afterward. Songs like “My War” are the best illustration of this, and “Depression” is perhaps so evocative of the emotion it should be included in an etymological discussion of the word itself (as writer Richard Meltzer suggested was the case with X’s “Nausea”). As we grow older, we are not only forced to accept the world around us, but in doing so, we become more self-aware. Speaking to Morris from his home in Los Feliz, it seems pretty clear that the music he now performs with FLAG emerged from a nearly adolescent lack of self-awareness. “When we were making this music, we had absolutely no idea as to what we were doing,” Morris says. “We just got in the room and I guess the best way to describe this was all of the feelings that we had going on, growing up, and some of the events and some of the things that were taking place around us was part of chemistry, was part of the program, was part of the — oh, geeze — the formula.

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posing, or posturing,” he says. “We didn’t know you had to look like this to be like that, to be able to play over there. We didn’t know any of that. We didn’t know that you’d record three or four songs and put them on a cassette and go to the club and seek out the person that booked the talent, or the owner of the club, and give them what we would call a demo. We didn’t know that. We didn’t know that was the way you did it. We just pestered people.” In the ’90s, as the next generation of bands that Morris inspired found a home on top 40 radio, fans of the music were quick to label anyone who found commercial success a traitor. Since then, his contemporaries like the Dead Kennedys have faced criticism for licensing their music for use in advertisements. I am always curious to learn more about the decision-making process. When I spoke to Chris Moore of Negative Approach for Metro Times last month, he told me it was not simply a matter of the musicians aging, or the way audiences perceive punk and hardcore, but also changing patterns in the way music is consumed. “If you were to have asked me this 10 years ago, I would have said, ‘No way; I’m going to license anything,’” Moore says. “But now I would be like, wherever I can grab a couple of bucks from any music

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M usic that I’m working on, I’ll pretty much do it, unless it’s going to something that’s going to hurt people. No one really makes any money off of music anymore in terms of sales, so you gotta find it somewhere else — performance, licensing, whatnot.” Morris’ explanation is simpler, and he cuts me off mid-sentence: “It’s called rent!” he says. “It’s called having to have health insurance and auto insurance, all of that fun stuff. It’s called being an adult. When we’re younger, we can run around and throw bricks through windows, or burn stuff down, or overturn police cars, and join the riot, and all of that fun stuff. It’s a reward for the people who made the recording in the first place, and all of the years that they’ve got out there in the van. And played in front of three people. Or played in front of 30 people all of these years. It’s a reward. Why shouldn’t a great musician that’s written an amazing song be able to pay their bills?” Morris tells me there is a popular rumor flying around LA — created by a shadowy organization he refers to as the “punk rock ethics committee” — that he owns a Beverly Hills mansion, filled with ornate fountains and European sports

feature cars, which he occasionally rents out as a location for rap videos and pornographic movies. He is quick to dispel this, but tells me he has long fantasized about obtaining a large piece of property in West Los Angeles for the purposes of creating an encampment for the city’s homeless, like a sort of gated tent city. His guests would be free to camp out in the backyard or front lawn, hold movie nights in the living room, or bathe in the fountain. “The swimming pool would be the same situation. It would just act as a giant bathtub,” he says, “as opposed to a giant urinal.” Appearing on Marc Maron’s podcast last year, Mike Watt (of Black Flag’s South Bay neighbors the Minutemen) claimed that one of the factors that tied many of the LA bands together, irrespective of geography, was a shared love for the Stooges. Everyone secretly considers their city to be the center of the universe, so in exchanging emails with Black Flag bassist and onetime SST label manager Dukowski, I can’t resist asking whether he thought of Iggy and Co. as a punk rock band per se. “Definitely,” he says. “Even before English punk happened, there was a small group of people who liked more

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extreme music of various sorts. The Stooges were one of the most extreme. It’s funny in today’s context to say that, but in the [mid-1970s] context it was real true. I got my copies of the first Stooges album and Fun House from classified ads, because they were unavailable new or used in stores out in LA. I remember getting interested in the Stooges because Fun House was named as the worst record of the year when it came out. After that, I was on the lookout for anything Stooges.” Morris’ opinion diverges slightly. “Would I consider the Stooges to be a punk rock band?” he says. “I consider the Stooges just to be an amazing, loud, abrasive rock and roll thing.” But today, he still holds them in the highest regard. “I think that the Metallic K.O. album, one of their last live performances, is one of the greatest live recordings ever. It’s one of those records that gets placed up there next to the Who’s Live at Leeds, or the Rolling Stones’ Get Yer Ya-Ya’s Out!” The image of the black flag is often associated with the political doctrine of anarchism, but the music of Black Flag could best be regarded as post-ideological. Songs like “White Minority” are clearly written from a satirical perspec-

tive, and assume an even greater irony when sung by Puerto Rican-American singer Reyes. But their work explores some of the darkest territory imaginable, so much so that my own love for Black Flag almost makes me uncomfortable at times. In a year when Kanye West’s latest album was canned by some critics for its misogyny, it is interesting to consider how songs like the Rollins-era “Slip It In” would be received today. But at 60, having accumulated decades’ worth of punk rock damage, Morris leaves me with some parting wisdom you’d never hear from the young men and women depicted in The Decline of Western Civilization. “Be a good human being,” he says. “Do good things for other people, and hopefully they’ll do good things for you.” FLAG plays with the Dirty Nil and Off With Their Heads at Small’s on Thursday, June 9; Doors at 7 p.m.; 10339 Conant St., Hamtramck; smallsbardetroit.com; the show is sold out, so check the resale circuit for a ticket.

M letters@metrotimes.com L@metrotimes

saturday, june 25 all girls, all zeppelin

lez zeppelin white shag with

this week â&#x20AC;˘

features

â&#x20AC;˘ upcoming

wednesday, june 8 thursday, june 16 ep release party mark

the accidentals friday, june 10 an acoustic evening

goodempty oldhouses war with

saturday, june 11 the ultimate retro party

the mega 80's also playing june 17 & 24

sunday, june 12 the elp legacy tour

carl palmer tuesday, june 14 the joy formidable with

drowners

just announced

saturday, october 1 cd release party

the kingbees

sunday, october 23

security project jerry marotta & trey gunn feat

thursday, november 17

savoy brown kim simmonds feat

saturday, july 30 from triumph

rik emmett thursday, august 18

lanegan with sean wheeler

saturday, june 18 pioneering guitarist the prince tribute

purple xperience feat

dr. fink

sunday, june 19 guitar virtuoso

dick dale friday, september 9

dave alvin & phil alvin

andy mckee nbrq vs los straitjackets english beat cactus thursday, september 15

thursday, july 7 featuring dave wakeling

friday, july 22 the wide awake tour

parachute

saturday, september 17

feat jim mccarty

wednesday, september 21 podcast live

saturday, july 23

sonny & the sunsets

throwing shade friday, september 23 especially for you!

the smithereens

with fred thomas coming soon

black crowes founder

10/9..............................midge ure 10/15....................okkervil river 10/28 & 29....dead again's halloween 11/10..........................matt wertz 11/12.........................live the who

with bonnie bishop

sunday, july 24

rich robinson

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nowhearthis M Recently added Mark your calendar today for these upcoming shows Tickets are now on sale for these events. June 14, BeyoncĂŠ at Ford Field; livenation.com; tickets are $45-$255. June 14, Flight of the Conchords at the Fox Theatre; OlympiaEntertainment.com; tickets at $38.50 and $53.50. July 7, Dead and Co. at DTE Energy Music Theatre; ticketmaster.com; tickets $36- $145.50. July 10, Violent Femmes at the Fillmore; thefillmoredetroit.com; tickets $35. July 12, Maxwell at Soaring Eagle Casino in Mount Pleasant; Ticket onsale date, prices, and special guests to be determined. July 14-16, 24th annual Concert of Colors with King Sunny Ade and more; concertofcolors.com; free.

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July 15, John Carpenter: Live Retrospective at the Cathedral Theatre at the Masonic Temple; ticketmaster.com; $35-$75. July 16, Garbage at the Fillmore; thefillmoredetroit.com; Tickets $29.50$59.50. July 23, Sonny and the Sunsets at the Magic Bag; themagicbag.com; $10. July 30, Diana Ross at Chene Park; ticketmaster.com; tickets $40-$100. July 31, Raekwon, Ghostface Killah at Saint Andrews Hall; livenation.com; tickets are $29.50. Aug. 4, Bryan Ferry at the Fox Theatre; olympiaentertainment.com; Tickets at $30, $55, $75, and $125.

The

Wednesday, June 8

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Wsg neCrOphagIa and perVersIOn -----------------------------------------------------------------------

Thursday, June 9

FLag - sOLd OuT

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FrIday, June 10

gOd MOduLe and FInITe auTOMaTa Wsg ghOsT synThesIs

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saTurday, June 11

ThIrsT WaVe

depeChe MOde TrIbuTe nIghT dJs pLeasure KITTen and aarOn hIngsT

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nowhearthis Aug. 17, ZZ Top, Gregg Allman at DTE Energy Music Theatre; ticketmaster.com; tickets $21-$111. Aug. 20, X performs Los Angeles, Aug. 21, X performs Wild Gift at El Club; Individual nights are $35-40, and two-day passes are $50. Sept. 9, AC/DC at the Palace of Auburn Hills; ticketmaster. com; tickets are $75$139.95. (Note: Existing tickets for the postponed March 20 date will be honored for this show.)

n Raekwon and Ghostface Killah. Courtesy photo.

Aug. 5, Louis C.K. at Joe Louis Arena; ticketmaster.com; tickets are $50. Aug. 5, Kool & the Gang, Bootsy Collins, and Doug E. Fresh at Freedom Hill Amphitheatre; livenation. com; tickets $16-$111. Aug. 12, Snoop Dogg and Wiz Khalifa at DTE Energy Music Theatre; ticketmaster.com; tickets $26-$125. Aug. 16, Blues Traveler and the Wallflowers at Meadow Brook Amphitheatre; ticketmaster.com; tickets $25-$65.

2016 || metrotimes.com 116 June 8-14, 2016 metrotimes.com

Oct. 1, Sigur Rós at the Fox Theatre; olympiaentertainment.com; $31.50, $41.50, $51.50, and $71.50.

letters@metrotimes.com @metrotimes

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Livewire

This week’s suggested musical events by MT Staff

Thursday, 6/9 Sunn O))) @ El Club

n Sunn O))) performing live in 2015. Photo by Dominik Matus, from Wikipedia.

If you’re down to subject yourself to an out-ofbody experience, consider this rare appearance by Seattle’s pioneers of heavy music, Sunn O))). Greg Anderson and Stephen O’Malley have paved the terrain where ambient drone and doom metal meet. With atonal compositions and deep grimy instrumentals, Sunn O))) creates a different music experience in every way possible. From wearing black cloaks onstage to playing their dark sounds very loud, the duo creates waves of eeriness that will feel good, we promise.

Doors at 8 p.m.; 4114 Vernor Hwy., Detroit; elclubdetroit.com; $30, all ages.

Thursday, 6/9

Friday, 6/10

Fri., 6/10- Sat., 6/11

Ivan Moshchuk

Fool’s Gold Presents: Gold Gone Wild

Robert Fripp

‘Everyone I Owe’

@ Saint Anne de Detroit Catholic Church

@ the Loving Touch

@ Orchestra Hall

@ Populux

Pro Musica of Detroit hosts this recital featuring the virtuoso pianist Ivan Moshchuk. The official launch of Moshchuk’s “Detroit Sessions,” the concert will not just feature the young pianist’s repertoire (which includes works by Alexander Scriabin, Johann Sebastian Bach, Maurice Ravel, David DiChiera, and Franz Liszt), it will also have contemporary dance routines performed by ArtLab J. Through this series, Moshchuk hopes to blend various art forms through music, to recreate the musical experience, and make each performance unique. Following the performance, there will be an afterglow reception where guests can mingle with the artists.

Doors at 7:15 p.m.; 3711 Woodward Ave., Detroit; promusicadetroit. com; Tickets start at $25.

It’s not Girl’s Gone Wild, but Gold Gone Wild — get it? The concert is the perfect cure for your post-Movement hangover. Fool’s Gold Records has thrown a package together that combines great hip-hop and electronic artists signed to the Brooklyn, New York-based label. This year’s lineup stars Tommy Trash. Sharing the stage with the DJ, producer, and remixer will be Gladiator, Kittens, Madeaux, Nick Catchdubs, Rome Fortune, and Shash’U. Gather at Populux this Friday and kick off another wild weekend.

Doors at 9:30 p.m.; 4140 Woodward Ave., Detroit; populuxdetroit.com; Tickets are $20.

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You either love him, hate him, or have no idea who we’re talking about. Such is the life of the eternal cult guitarist, the architect of “Frippertronics” who for 25 years led his own “Guitar Craft” course. Fripp is, of course, also the co-founder of King Crimson, as well as one of Brian Eno’s most artistically successful collaborators. The composer and musician brings his large ensemble, the Orchestra of Crafty Guitarists, to the gorgeous church setting for a special performance. This large group plays in the round, and their acoustic guitar playing merges composed and improvised sounds.

Doors at 7 p.m.; 1000 St. Anne St., Detroit; steanneschurch.org; $30 in advance, $35 day of show.

Billed as “Two nights. Two stages. 23 bands. No Kickstarter,” this entire event will be professionally filmed by a crew of volunteers, with the resulting edited footage uploaded over the following months. “Everyone I Owe” is a who’s who of local underground pop/rock/ other type acts, with the High Strung, Illy Mack, Satin Peaches, Messenger Birds, Earth Engine, the Oscillating Fan Club, Rogue Satellites, Siamese, and everyone’s favorites, the Kickstand Band.

Doors at 8 p.m.; 22634 Woodward Ave., Ferndale; thelovingtouchferndale.com; $10/ night.

Thursday, 6/9 Cécile McLorin Salvant @ Sound Board

There’s nothing like bringing jazz back into the Motor City — Motor City Casino, that is. Head to Sound Board to be astounded by the Grammy Award-›winning jazz musician Cécile McLorin Salvant. After starting her classical music career at a young age, Salvant has quickly gained attention in the jazz music scene within the last couple of years. Nominated two years in a row for best jazz vocal album before finally winning a Grammy this year, the vocalist continues to add to her extensive resume that includes performances at various national music festivals and a performance at the White House for Jazz Day.

Doors at 8 p.m.; 2901 Grand River Ave., Detroit; soundboarddetroit.com; Tickets start at $22.

n Cécile McLorin Salvant. Photo courtesy Spoleto Festival USA.

Saturday, 6/11

Sunday, 6/12

Tuesday, 6/14

Wednesday, 6/15

MotorBall

Eskimo Brothers @ PJ’s Lager House

The Joy Formidable, Drowners

Wreckless Eric

@ Saint Andrews Hall

@ UFO Factory

@ The Magic Bag

If you’re into spunky remixes of great songs, illusion shows, drag queens, and also helping a great cause, you should totally go to the MotorBall. The MotorBall is the official after-party for Motor City Pride. The goal of the event is to help raise funds and awareness for HIV and AIDS with proceeds from the event supporting HIV/AIDS programs in Michigan. Raise awareness while letting loose at the MotorBall.

Doors at 9 p.m.; 431 E. Congress St., Detroit; saintandrewsdetroit. com; Tickets are $22.

The Eskimo Brothers are coming from Nashville, Tenn., and if you’re up for a rootin’ tootin’ good time, you don’t want to miss this one. The trio plays that raw hillbilly, honky-tonk kind of country that sounds like a good time to anybody. With David Graham on guitar, Tyler Boydstun on the drums, and Mark Robertson on the bass, the band rocks out while commanding the crowd to rock out too.

Doors at 8 p.m.; 1254 Michigan Ave., Detroit; pjslagerhouse.com; Tickets are $5.

The New York-based quartet Drowners are coming to fill your ears with upbeat tunes and your heart with deep feelings. They play the type of indie garage pop that brings on nostalgia for purple sunsets. Headlining is the Joy Formidable, all the way from Wales. They’ll be playing songs off their new album, Hitch, that’s totally Rock ‘n’ Roll. Oh, and they’ve got a badass front woman who sounds like a punk-rock dream.

Doors at 8 p.m.; 22920 Woodward Ave., Ferndale; themagicbag.com; Tickets are $21.

Wreckless Eric aka Eric Goulden is the architect of many pop-punk aficionados’ favorite songs, notably the absolute anthem of all sensitive young souls, “Whole Wide World.” There’s much more to the artists than that one song, of course, but even if he hadn’t just recorded one of the best albums of his career, it’d be worth seeing him just so he could play that one song, because it really is one of the best songs that ever got written and performed by any single person, ever.

Doors at 9 p.m.; 2110 Trumbull Ave., Detroit; ufofactory.com; $12.

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A rts In a southwest Detroit alley, a friendship of circumstance

feature

by Jimmy Doom Every day I cut through the alley behind my house on the way to the store. There’s a distinct and occasionally heavy smell of methane that emanates from a sewer opening. The pavement is so contoured that, if it was made of dirt and mud, it would make for a good BMX stunt. And most of the time, there’s a guy, sitting on a guardrail. For all the other decay in the alley, the guardrail is an anomaly. It’s in better shape than most freeway guardrails and really doesn’t belong in an alley with very little traffic. The guy who sits on it doesn’t really “belong” there, I guess. At least not the first time I saw him, early in the morning, hungover and taking a circuitous route around the methane spewing sewer that would put the most flatulent Hereford to shame. And in the process, I almost kicked over his beer. He may have even

thought I was going to do it on purpose and I immediately apologized. He didn’t respond. I didn’t press the issue. I began to see him nearly every day and said hello. For whatever reason, he didn’t respond the first seven or eight or dozen times, so I just stopped addressing him. If I was him and I had found a quiet little place in an alley I liked, methane be damned, I’d probably be pissed that some bearded dickhead was disturbing my beer-and-bologna revelry. He always has a 24-ounce can of Milwaukee’s Best — “The Beast,” as we used to call it when it was all we could afford, knowing it didn’t have the kick of Olde English or ElevenEleven (four sticks of dynamite, for real, at 8 percent-plus ABV). About half the time he has a package of cheap bologna, peeling it off slice by slice and popping it in his mouth.

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One day I came around the corner on my way back from the store and startled him. He looked at me with a half snarl, more “Motherfucker, you scared me” than “get the hell away from me.” I said I was sorry. He said ‘You alright today?” “Sure.” Just small talk, stuff that happens on elevators and buses when you see someone all the time. So the next time I saw him, I asked him if he needed anything. He had his can of beer, 75 percent covered with a brown bag, the kind of thing a cop could be a dick about if they wanted. In over a year, I had only seen a cruiser roll down the alley once, but you never know. He responded to my offer with an “I’m good.” Just enough hesitation for me to wonder if I should have said, “I’m buying”. In retrospect, I should have of course made that clear, but I didn’t. Most people who encountered him in

the alley would probably refer to him as homeless, and that may be the case, but he doesn’t strike me as completely homeless. Some days he’s cleaned up enough that it wouldn’t be out of the question for him to apply for a job. For that matter, I’m not entirely sure he doesn’t have some kind of part-time gig or at least government assistance, for which one usually needs an address. I did see him one day, much earlier than I’m usually up, and from his eyes and his clothing, I gathered that he might have slept in the bed of a pickup truck, one of several abandoned vehicles parked in the yard of the vacant and decaying house on the corner of what is otherwise a well-maintained block. But he always has beer, and he travels light, and he doesn’t panhandle at any of the stores or corners in the neighborhood. As many times as I’ve seen him, I’ve never even seen him coming around the corner

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A rts to get to where he hangs out. He’s just there. Until the other day. He had been there during our unseasonably cold weather, but he had been there during our average below zero temperatures in February, too. We actually remarked to each other about how crappy the weather was. It was always small talk. It was never freaking Tuesdays with Morrie or war stories or tales of drug addiction or dialysis. I know some of those guys too, by name. John, the recovering alcoholic, who could play a white-haired recovering alcoholic drifter in any movie, and Paul, who always has a different bike and apologizes for dumpster diving, even though I’ve made it clear I don’t care. I never got around to asking the Milwaukee’s Best Light guy his name, probably due to our awkward first meeting. As I came around the corner from the store recently, I almost said hi. But it was just an overcoat, draped over the guardrail where he likes to sit. I looked around, but he wasn’t pissing behind a car, or down at the dumpster throwing out his bologna wrapper — yes, he cleans up after himself. But his beer can was still there. And almost assuredly close to full, otherwise it would have

feature blown over in what was a pretty significant wind. And I had never seen him in a beige overcoat. For that matter, it was cold enough that he probably would have been wearing it. Had he been hauled off to jail for a warrant? Possible, but the cops probably would have let him bring the coat, unless he left it there on purpose because there was contraband in the pockets. Had a family member tracked him down and taken him home? He still wouldn’t have left the coat. It looked almost new, and I had always known him to be sort of fastidious. He ate his bologna with a napkin, for Oscar Mayer’s sake. He always had beer, but never seemed drunk. If he had fallen ill in the alley in the short time I was in the store, there’s no way in hell an ambulance in this town would have gotten to him. I would have found him first. It began to rain. I thought about taking the coat inside my house to keep it dry for him. But if he came back for it, how would he know? I could leave him a note, but if I wasn’t home, what good would that do him? A week has gone by. The coat is still draped on the guardrail, waiting for

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Waiting on a friend. Photo by Jimmy Doom.

my friend to come back. Yeah, he’s my friend. We don’t share much, other than a neighborhood and a fondness for beer, though I gave it up for a very, very extended Lent. And when my friend comes back, I’m gonna buy him a Milwaukee’s Best Light, unless I can talk him into something better. And I’m

gonna give him a place to hang his coat on my back porch. And I’m gonna ask him his name. Jimmy Doom is a Detroiter who acts, writes, and screams at TVs during sporting events.

letters@metrotimes.com @metrotimes

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C ULTURE

HIGHERground

Fighting for a vote on legalized marijuana by Larry Gabriel MILegalize is still kicking. The effort to legalize recreational marijuana in Michigan turned in more than 350,000 signatures in its attempt to put the question on the fall ballot. It was the only group out of a number of petition efforts to actually turn in their petitions with the qualifying 252,523 signatures. To the organizers, activists, petition circulators, and petition signers, I say: “Well done.” But the main question being asked now is: Was it done quickly enough? MILegalize spent a year collecting signatures, and overcame numerous obstacles, from challenges to the petition print size, to a lack of money and no support from national organizations. That’s something the Michigan Cannabis Coalition’s competing ballot initiative couldn’t do. Neither could the Committee to Ban Fracking in Michigan and a handful of others. Despite gathering enough signatures,

there is an issue with signatures that are older than 180 days from the turn-in date. There’s an unsubstantiated idea that petition signatures have to be gathered within 180 days of the date the petition was filed with the state — although according to MILegalize chair Jeffrey Hank, some initiatives have historically taken years to collect enough signatures. “We believe that the process we’re using squares with the law,” Hank says. “As long as we have enough signatures, the ball’s in the hands of the Board of Elections.” While it’s unclear as to what the letter of the law is and how it’s been applied, it looks like Hank’s argument holds water. The proof is in the fact that the state legislature saw fit to pass a new law, SB 776, last month titled: “Limit time period for collecting ballot initiative signatures.” If the legislature saw the need to

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explicitly define the 180-day period in a new law, it means the time period was not nailed down already. In addition, the law would take effect immediately if signed by Gov. Rick Snyder, and there is no indication that he won’t, thereby making the MiLegalize and anti-fracking petitions null and void. The Committee to Ban Fracking in Michigan, admittedly short of its signature goal at the June 1 deadline, has already filed suit, saying the 180-day time period is unconstitutional. “Whether or not the governor signs SB 776, the legal issue of our case is that the constitution specifies no circulation period and the 180-day restriction curtails our right, with or without a rebuttable presumption,” Ellis Boal, the anti-fracking group’s legal counsel, said in a press release. It’s possible that MILegalize will support the lawsuit. “We’re talking about it, but there is

no final decision,” says Jamie Lowell, a MILegalize board member. “We’ve turned in what we believe is enough signatures to be on the ballot for 2016.” MILegalize members are not willing to just take no for an answer. That wouldn’t be in character for the group. Many of its members are the same people who have fought to change the

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C ULTURE HIGHERground state’s marijuana laws this past decade. Even if they are successful, MILegalize members have a tough fight going toward the November elections. Much of it’s an education campaign about cannabis, and about how potential tax money could help Michigan, which is facing a budget shortfall. “If it goes to a vote, then we’ve got a fighting chance,” Hank says. “Every political figure in Michigan will have to take a stand.” Polls show that 56 percent of Michigan voters support legalizing recreational marijuana. That percentage will dip once a well-funded antimarijuana campaign kicks in. Every law enforcement group in the state is against legalization, and they’ve been preparing for the fight. “The Michigan Association of Police Chiefs is taking the other side,” Hank says. “They have a PowerPoint presentation right out of Reefer Madness.” Opposition to legalization is focusing on access to young people, edible products with high THC infusions, and stoned driving. There are plenty of ways to counter these arguments if people will listen. For instance, recently published data in the Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry found that fewer adolescents are using cannabis, and those who do are less likely to engage in problematic use. Child-resistant packaging is being used more and more often. However, it’s difficult to get people to listen when they’re worrying about what’s going to happen to their kids. “We try to get ahead of that argument, countering those negatives and accentuating the positives,” Hank says. It’s not the kind of issue that will definitively be put to bed soon. There are powerful feelings on each side of the marijuana issue, and success in any direction will be met with pushback. Prohibition forces have been sharpening their attacks, and they are well-funded. Casino magnate Sheldon Adelson has fought medical marijuana in Florida to the tune of $5 million. We haven’t seen anything like that in Michigan, but even if the not-sodeep pockets open up to “save the children,” there could be a lot of anti-pot money circulating. This year was seen as a potentially landmark one for marijuana legalization. And it still could be, although there have already been disappointments in Vermont, where an antici-

June 8-14, 8-14, 2016 2016 | metrotimes.com 128 June

pated legislative legalization didn’t materialize, and in Ohio, where a medical marijuana petition effort recently ended in the face of a restrictive medical marijuana legislation that the governor has yet to sign. As many as 20 medical or recreational votes could take place in November across the country. If every one of those votes failed, except California, it would still be considered a big year for marijuana legalization. In 1996, California was the first state to legalize medical marijuana, but a recreational legalization attempt in 2010 was lost amid squabbling between factions of marijuana supporters. Right now, the balance seems to be in favor of legalization, but it’s still too close to call. If a few more states legalize medical marijuana, it would tip the balance so a majority of states have substantial medical access. A win in Michigan would be big because a notinsignificant state in the Midwest, with no outstate help, would be a leader in the cause. There are so many scenarios that could play out. I’m looking for a huge year, thanks in no small way to the folks at MILegalize. Bravo, Laith Al-Saadi Congratulations to Ann Arbor guitarist and singer Laith Al-Saadi for making it as one of the four finalists on the NBC television show The Voice. The show is a singing competition, but Al-Saadi led with his guitar to make the finals by growling some great blues and classic rock while channeling the likes of Joe Cocker, B.B. King, and Ray Charles. Al-Saadi got plenty of praise and kudos along the way, but it never came up that he is a regular performer at the Ann Arbor Hash Bash, ripping out “The Star Spangled Banner” in Jimi Hendrix fashion for the annual rally. A quick online search reveals plenty of documentation of Al-Saadi at the bash. AlSaadi chose to lean toward Hendrix on The Voice, playing “All Along the Watchtower” in an Instant Save performance along the way. It’s not often someone from the local scene makes it to the big stage, let alone someone who is so openly cannabis-friendly.

letters@metrotimes.com @gumbogabe

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I’m a 33-year-old straight guy with a small dick. I have a girlfriend of seven years. When we met, I was really insecure and she had to spend a lot of time reassuring me that it didn’t matter — she loved my dick, sex with me was great, it was big enough for her, etc. I broke up with her once because I didn’t think she should settle for someone so small. After some hugely painful nights and another near breakup, we are in a good place now. We have lots of great vanilla sex, we love being together, and we recently got engaged. After everything I put her through — and I put her through hell — how do I tell her that being mocked (and worse) for having a small dick is the only thing I ever think about when I masturbate? I want a woman to punish me emotionally and physically for having such a small and inadequate dick. There’s porn about my kink, but I didn’t discover it until long after I was aware of my interest. (I grew up in a weird family that lived “off the grid,” and I didn’t get online until I got into college at age 23.) I’ve never been able to bring myself to tell anyone about my kink. How do I tell this woman? I basically bullied her into telling me that my dick was big enough — and now I want her to tell me it isn’t big enough. But do I really want her to? I’ve never actually experienced the kind of insulting comments and physical punishments that I fantasize about. What if the reality is shattering? — Tense In New York

“I was in a similar situation years ago with my then-girlfriend, now-wife,” TP says. “I was too chicken to tell her about my fetish and worried she wasn’t satisfied with my size, so I didn’t want to bring more attention to it. I eventually went to a pro Domme and felt guilty about doing it behind my girlfriend’s back.” TP, which stands for Tiny Prick, is a prominent member of the SPH (small penis humiliation) fetish scene. TP is active on Twitter (@deliveryboy4m) and maintains a blog devoted to the subjects of SPH (his passion) and animal rights (a subject his Domme is passionate about) at fatandtiny.blogspot.com. “I got really lucky because I found the Domme I’ve been serving for more than 10 years,” TP says. “It was my Domme who encouraged me to bring up my kinks with my wife. I only wish I had told my wife earlier. She hasn’t turned into a stereotypical dominatrix, but she was open to incorporating some SPH play into our sex life.” According to TP, TINY, you’ve already laid the groundwork for the successful

by Dan Savage

incorporation of SPH into your sex life: You’re having good, regular, and satisfying vanilla sex with your partner. “TINY’s partner is happy with their sex life, so he knows he can satisfy a woman,” TP says. “That will help to separate the fantasy of the humiliation from the reality of their strong relationship. I know if I wasn’t having good vanilla sex, it would be much harder to enjoy the humiliation aspect of SPH.” When you’re ready to broach the subject with the fiancée, TINY, I would recommend starting with both an apology (“I’m sorry again for what I put you through”) and a warning (“What I’m about to say is probably going to come as a bit of a shock”). Then tell her you have a major kink you haven’t disclosed, tell her she has a right to know about it before you marry, tell her that most people’s kinks are wrapped up with their biggest fears and anxieties … and she’ll probably be able to guess what you have to tell her before you can get the words out. “He should explain to her that he doesn’t want to be emotionally hurt as much as he wants to feel exposed and vulnerable, and that can be a thrill,” TP says. “It can be hard for people to understand how humiliation can be fun. But humiliation play is one way to add a new dynamic to their sexual relationship.”

I was traveling and forgot to pack lube, so I amused myself with some old conditioner I’d brought. It had some menthol in it or something and it tingled a bit, but it did the job. When I woke up, my dick had shriveled into a leathery red sheath of pain. I looked at the bottle again, and it wasn’t conditioner, it was actually a 10 percent benzoyl peroxide cleanser. After a few days, my leathery foreskin flaked off and the pain went away. Should I be concerned about my dick? — Onanism Until Cock Hurts

No, OUCH, your dick should be concerned about you. You’re the one who, despite having a foreskin to work/ jerk with, grabbed the nearest bottle of whatever was handy instead of using the masturbation sleeve the good Lord gave ya. And you’re the one who didn’t read the label on the nearest bottle of whatever before pouring its contents all over your cock. Caveat masturbator!

C mail@savagelove.net L@fakedansavage

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Medicare and Medicaid Notice to the Public RESIDENTIAL & COMMERCIAL REALTY SERVICES

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Notice is hereby given that on June 29, 2016, the agreement between the Secretary of Health and Human Services and Law-Den Nursing Home, Detroit, MI as a skilled nursing facility in the Medicare program will be terminated. In addition, as authorized by the Michigan Department of Community Health, notice is given that the facility’s agreement as a nursing facility in the Medicaid program will be terminated effective June 29, 2016. The Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services has determined that Law-Den Nursing Home has failed to attain substantial compliance with the following Medicare and Medicaid participation requirements:

• 42 CFR 483.10 -- Resident Rights • 42 CFR 483.13 -- Resident Behavior and Facility Practices • 42 CFR 483.15 -- Quality of Life • 42 CFR 483.20 -- Resident Assessment • 42 CFR 483.25 -- Quality of Care • 42 CFR 483.30 -- Nursing Services • 42 CFR 483.65 -- Infection Control • 42 CFR 483.75 -- Administration

The Medicare program will not make payment for skilled nursing facility services furnished to residents admitted to the facility on or after March 20, 2016. For residents admitted prior to March 20, 2016, payment may continue to be made for up to 30 days of services after June 29, 2016, the date of termination. In addition, Federal Financial Participation will not be available to the State for any Medicaid residents admitted to the facility on or after March 20, 2016. For Medicaid residents admitted prior to March 20, 2016, Federal Financial Participation may continue to be made to the State for up to 30 days of covered services to qualified residents furnished on or after June 29, 2016, the date of termination. Jean Ay, Branch Manager Long Term Care Certification & Enforcement Branch Midwest Division of Survey & Certification Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services | Regional Office V, Chicago, Illinois

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C ulture

horoscopes by Cal Garrison

ARIES (March 21- April 20):

How much further can you go? Big questions that involve calling it quits, or not, have many of you feeling indecisive. For someone who never wavers, at the last minute even you are asking yourself if it’s worth it to put your faith in what has yet to pan out. There is no blanket prescription to use as a guide, but it’s safe to say that you are going places. The next few months will include emotional fireworks and require more reserve strength than usual. You could pass all of this up and stay home but what will that get you? Take a deep breath and keep on going. TAURUS (April 21 -May 20):

Both ends to the middle is one of those places that all of us wind up in now and then. What we do about it depends on how easy it is to keep it up when we find ourselves in a compromise that requires more from us than we expected. You’ve gotten what you wanted from a situation that can’t give you more than you’ve taken from it. As far as that goes? It’ll take time to get the lesson. Part of you is too attached to all of this — but the idea that anything needs to be perpetuated past a certain point becomes ridiculous in the face of changes that beg you to move on.

LEO (July 21-Aug. 20):

You finally have enough room to breathe. It’s good that you got this to work. Moving and changing, as things unfold, look forward to a new cast of characters and a whole new set of conditions. Balancing yourself in an expanded state is bound to free your mind and take you far enough to see what needs to be done. The old story is about to be infused by other worldly things, the kind of stuff that shows up when you’re on the right track, waiting for a sign. Stay open: Beggars on the path could be angels in disguise, sent to steer you in the right direction.

What goes around comes around. Given recent events you’re either riding a wave of generosity and fulfillment, or you’ve crashed and burned. There’s no easy way to talk about where you’re going. Those of you who are on higher ground need to enjoy those blessings and bask in that goodness while it’s alive. Those of you who have been hung out to dry are living with the laws of karma. No matter how dire those consequences might be, everything is open to change. There is always redemption for anyone who sees the error of their ways and who wants to make amends.

(Nov. 21-Dec. 20):

You’ve totally had it. If you weren’t so good at putting on a happy face God knows where your attitude would be. As if one crisis after another wasn’t enough, all of a sudden things took a turn for the worse and you’re wondering what it’s all for. I have no advice for you except to say that even this has to have a purpose. Instead of focusing so much on the problem take a look at what the solution might be. If you could only bring yourself to accept the fact you have absolutely nothing to say about other people’s choices, their direction, or their life, this would be easier.

VIRGo (Aug. 21-Sept. 20):

The people who drive us crazy are always our best teachers. This is so hard to admit, but it’s true. In your case, whoever’s making you nuts reminds you too much of (fill in the blanks) for you to be able to see them as anything but a nuisance — at best. You don’t want to be reminded of things that force you to question everything about yourself. That’s OK but sooner or later we all have to reckon with the things that youth and denial drive us to run away from. It will be easier for you to confront the truth if you can get behind the idea that it sets us free. LIBRA (Sept. 21-Oct. 20):

GEMINI (May 21-June 20):

SAGITTARIUS

It’s hard to say how you feel. On the one hand you’re totally in tune with the idea that everything is divinely ordered; on the other hand, you’re a bit confused by whatever you’re looking at right now. The burning question of the day is: What will it take to enjoy this? There is no prescription for what it takes to fill every experience with joy. Don’t hassle yourself for being less than perfect and use what you know to let difficulty, stress, challenges, and doubt take you deeper into the heart of your reality. May your dreams be in keeping with what’s in your highest good.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 21-Jan. 20):

If you could clear up one last thing it would be so much easier for you to sail right on out of here — literally or metaphorically, you are so close to having it all together, it’s scary! When nothing is totally clear, and belief keeps us from trusting what we know inside, it’s hard to know what to do. Don’t think that you have to keep agreeing to anything that isn’t working for you — and don’t think that what other people want has to take precedence over what it will take to get this to work for you. PS: You’re here too! Think about it; this time the choice could very well be up to you. AQUARIUS (Jan. 21-Feb. 20):

This doesn’t have to turn into a big production. You could be overreacting to something that is less of a deal than you’re making it. Whoever you have a problem with would be easier to get around if you understood more about how they see things. You don’t have to be their next best friend to figure out why it is that they won’t get off your back. This is a no-brainer, my friend. If you want to sort things out all you have to do is be willing to hear them out, decide how much you owe on this debt, and strike it off your list of Karmic debts once and for all.

SCORPIO (Oct. 21-Nov. 20): CANCER (June 21-July 20):

You are starting all over again. Within the next few weeks another story will unfold. You are already at a place where you can see it coming. Whatever this is going to look like, hinges a lot on your willingness to let go of the idea that you need anyone else’s permission to go for it. For many of you, the sense of responsibility to the past, to family, or anything that involves external expectations has you looking at your codependent tendencies. More than anything, the need to recognize yourself and your own needs is what will wind up serving everyone in the long run.

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Tied up with people and things that are too close for comfort, you can’t get enough distance on all of this to be able to see it for what it is. Everyone thinks they’re right. Someone is “righter” than others. Knowing more about their issues than they do is where it’s at right now. Knowing as much about yourself feeds into it too. In situations that are less than comfortable don’t let your fear and control issues disrupt the ability to get the desired result. Keep your distance long enough to assess things. When you see this for what it is, you will make yourself heard.

PISCES (Feb. 21-March 20):

You think you know how this is supposed to go. Years of needing to keep all of your ducks in a row have made it so that you are always the one who’s supposed to have that information. In this situation, the less you try to manage things, the better. Too much has changed, and continues to change for you to think that you have the inside scoop on any of it. Rebirthing yourself with new goals and a new sense of purpose is what this is all about. Don’t be in a big rush to know what’s going on. Consider a change of location. It could greatly increase your chances for success.

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