Orlando Weekly March 30, 2016 by Chava Communications

How an Orlando data scientist is helping the #BlackLivesMatter movement make the case against police violence, p8 By Monivette Cordeiro

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Publisher Graham Jarrett Associate Publisher Leslie Egan Interim Editor Jessica Bryce Young Editorial Staff Writer Monivette Cordeiro Calendar Editor Thaddeus McCollum Music Editor Matthew Moyer Digital Content Editor Colin Wolf Interns Deanna Ferrante, Marissa Mahoney, Rachel Stuart, Kim Slichter Contributors Rob Bartlett, Jen Cray, James Dechert, Jason Ferguson, Hannah Glogower, Holly V. Kapherr, Faiyaz Kara, Seth Kubersky, Bao Le-Huu, Nick McGregor, Cameron Meier, Richard Reep, Steve Schneider, Ken Storey

Renters’ rants I lived in Orlando from 2005-2007, and rent deﬁnitely seemed more reasonable back then (“Here’s what $1,000 in rent gets you in Orlando right now,” March 30). My 550-square-foot one-bedroom at Conroy

Advertising Account Manager Lindsey Hahn Senior Multimedia Account Executive Dan Winkler Multimedia Account Executives Jessica Flynn, Scott Navarro Classified and Legal Rep Jerrica Schwartz

and Vineland was $600 per month, then my 700-square-foot two-bedroom, onebathroom at Rio Grande and Holden was $695 per month.

Marketing and Events Events Director Zackary Rowe Events and Promotions Manager Brad Van De Bogert Marketing and Events Coordinator Rachel Hoyle Marketing/Promotions Interns Lauren Patton, Emily Franklin Creative Services Creative Services Manager Shelby Sloan Graphic Designer Chris Tobar Rodriguez

Jill Coriano, via Facebook

news & features 8 News

Business Operations Manager Hollie Mahadeo Business Assistant Allysha Willison

Payday loans cost Floridians $2.5 billion over the last decade, and Rick Scott signs medical marijuana expansion and abortion restrictions into law

Circulation Circulation Manager Collin Modeste

8 This Modern World

Euclid Media Group Chief Executive Officer Andrew Zelman Chief Operating Officers Chris Keating, Michael Wagner Human Resources Director Lisa Beilstein Digital Operations Coordinator Jaime Monzon euclidmediagroup.com National Advertising: Voice Media Group 1-888-278-9866, voicemediagroup.com Orlando Weekly Inc. 16 W. Pine St. Orlando, Florida 32801 orlandoweekly.com Phone 407-377-0400 Fax 407-377-0420 Orlando Weekly is published every week by Euclid Media Group Verified Audit Member Orlando Distribution Orlando Weekly is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Copyright notice: The entire contents of Orlando Weekly are copyright 2016 by Euclid Media Group LLC. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission of the publisher is prohibited. Publisher does not assume any liability for unsolicited manuscripts, materials, or other content. Any submission must include a stamped, self-addressed envelope. All editorial, advertising, and business correspondence should be mailed to the address listed above. Subscriptions: Additional copies or back issues may be purchased at the Orlando Weekly ofﬁces for $1. Six-month domestic subscriptions may be purchased for $75; one-year subscriptions for $125.

My rent has gone up nearly $100 in two

ILLUSTRATION BY CHRISTOPHER KRETZER

11 Afford me not Harvard Joint Center for Housing Studies says more than half of Orlando renters are “rentburdened”

years, which doesn’t seem like a lot, but

25 Recently Reviewed Short takes on restaurants we’ve visited recently

other states like Massachusetts. And when

film

you move down here because housing is

27 Union of the snake

cheaper, it doesn’t exactly make it easy.

Embrace of the Serpent challenges some Western ideals – like the impulse to protect indigenous peoples who neither need nor want our protection

13 Home in your range

14 Millennials ain’t gonna rent forever Economist says younger generation will start buying

arts & culture 17 McRae Art Studios moving? As warehouses around the city are demolished, the fate of the longtime artists enclave hangs in the balance

Lydia Delaney, via Facebook Absolutely ridiculous rents here! Where

27 Film Listings Cinema-oriented events to go see this week

How to buy a house for the ﬁrst time without losing your mind

now a studio is almost as much as it is in

we live, in an area known for great schools,

28 Opening in Orlando

neighbors are trying to rent out their homes

Movies opening this week: Collide and Everybody Wants Some!!

for about $600 more per month than we pay for our mortgage, taxes, HOA and

music

insurance. WTH? I understand some people

31 The shriek goes on

bought high, but it is ridiculous!

The MultipleTap tour is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to see the best in Japanese noise

Mich IrOr, via Facebook

31 Picks This Week

Rent rises alongside the number of

19 Live Active Cultures

Great live music rattles Orlando every night

Orlando experiences an opera renaissance in April with productions by the Orlando Phil and the new Opera Orlando

33 This Little Underground

defaulted mortgages. Simple. This issue

Run River North breaks the Asian-band sterotype; Tancred keeps the ’90s revival train a-rollin’

stretches far beyond Orlando in the grand

food & drink 21 Standard deviation Highly touted Metro Diner presents enjoyably embellished comfort-food classics

21 Tip Jar Food Truck Fridays launches at the Dr. Phil, Red Mug Diner brings 24-hour dining to downtown, plus more in our weekly food news roundup

22 10 Under $10 Welcome to our monthly roundup of places to get lunch for less than $10

scheme of things. Calendar 34 Selections 38 The Week 39 Down the Road

Ron Weinberg, via Facebook Got something to add? Email feedback@orlandoweekly.com.

Back Pages 65 Free Will Astrology 65 Lulu Eightball 65 Gimme Shelter 66 Savage Love 68 Classifieds

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First Words compiles emails, letters and comments from orlandoweekly. com. We reserve the right to edit for length, content and clarity.

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Thanks to our restaurants

NEWS & FEATURES

counterparts,” the Center for Responsible Lending report says. “Considering all of these facts, individuals and communities that struggle most to accumulate wealth and are less capable of breaking the cycle of debt are most geographically targeted by payday lenders.” – Monivette Cordeiro

Rick Scott signs medical marijuana expansion, abortion clinic restrictions

PHOTO OF RICK SCOTT COURTESY FLGOV.COM

Payday loans have cost Floridians $2.5 billion in last decade, report finds Since 2005, Floridians have paid $2.5 billion in fees to payday lenders, despite state regulations, according to a new report from the Center for Responsible Lending. A payday loan is a high-interest, lowdollar loan that is due on your next payday, says Delvin Davis, a senior research analyst at the nonpartisan research center and co-author of the report. For example, let’s say you need $500. You go to the payday loan store and write the lender a postdated check for $500 plus, in this case, a $50 fee. Two weeks later, the lender cashes your check, and that’s the end of it, right? What actually ends up happening, according to Davis, is that after two weeks, most people don’t have the money to pay $550. Instead, they go back to the lender and pay the rollover fee of $50 for two more weeks to pay off the full loan. “Basically you’re kicking the snowball down the hill,” he says. “Two weeks later, the same situation happens again and every two weeks you’re paying the rollover fee, but you never pay anything down on the original $500 loan. It’s a debt treadmill. It’s easy to get into, but hard to get out.” The billions Floridians have paid to lenders in the past decade are just in fees, like the $50 example Davis discussed. Last year alone, lenders collected $311 million in fees. 8

Florida passed a payday loan reform law in 2001 that limits people to one loan at a time, sets a 24-hour waiting period between loans, and requires extended payment plans, financial counseling and the authority to track payday lending activity. But the report says the Florida law has loopholes payday lenders are exploiting “through a regulatory framework that fails to safeguard borrowers from sliding deeper and deeper into a cycle of debt, and permits loans with [annual percentage rates] in excess of 300 percent.” An Orlando Sentinel article from 2007 reported some payday lender companies were skirting reforms, charging annual percentage rates on loans that exceeded 400 to 700 percent. Davis says payday lenders are operating under a different section of Florida law that allows them to charge astronomical annual percentage rates averaging 278 percent in the state. Davis and his co-author also found 83 percent of payday loans are going to Floridians stuck in seven or more loans. When researchers mapped 1,100 payday loan stores in Florida, they found that stores were highly concentrated in African-American and Latino communities. The report also found that the number of seniors ages 65 and older borrowing payday loans more than doubled from 3.4 percent of all borrowers in 2005 to 8.6 percent in 2015. “Across the country, AfricanAmericans and Latinos continue to earn less on the job and possess only a fraction the net worth of their white

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New restrictions on abortion clinics and the expansion of medical marijuana were among the many bills Gov. Rick Scott signed into law last week. HB 307 expands the “Right to Try Act” to include medical marijuana and allow “terminally ill patients to have access to experimental drugs that have not been approved for general use by the U.S. Food and Drug Administration,” according to the News Service of Florida. The more controversial HB 1411 requires abortion clinic doctors to have admitting privileges or transfer agreements with local hospitals; blocks clinics from receiving Medicaid funding for preventative services like cancer screenings, STD tests and contraception; treats clinics more like surgical centers; changes

Florida’s definition of the first trimester of pregnancy; toughens restrictions on improper disposal of fetal remains; and requires the state to inspect at least half of clinic records every year. Planned Parenthood and its supporters have vowed to fight back against the bill. “This cruel bill is designed to rip health care away from those most at risk,” says Cecile Richards, president of Planned Parenthood Federation of America, in a statement. “In their callous zeal to pass this legislation, politicians in Florida actually suggested that women could turn to elementary schools and podiatrists to seek the essential reproductive health care they would no longer be able to access at Planned Parenthood. At Planned Parenthood, we will not stop fighting for those patients who depend on us for care.” Scott also signed into law measures that would: create a needle-exchange pilot program at the University of Miami that would try to help prevent the spread of blood-borne diseases; establish standards for the use of police body cameras; and require law enforcement agencies to submit rape kits to the Florida Department of Law Enforcement for testing within 30 days of the beginning of their investigations or notification by victims that they wish the evidence to be tested. – MC

NEWS & FEATURES

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Harvard Joint Center for Housing Studies says more than half of Orlando renters are “rent-burdened” BY MON IVETTE COR D EI R O

he dank parking lot of the Great Value Suites on Orange Blossom Trail is seemingly abandoned and quiet one Saturday afternoon in January. Not for long, though. Gus Martinez and members of the charity organization Miles of Help Through Christ drive up to the parking lot. Their cars are packed to the brim with lunch boxes of rice and chicken, loaves of bread, pastries, cakes, cases of water, toys and clothing. Martinez gazes up for a second at the apartments before yelling, “Is anyone hungry?” Slowly, one, then two, then seven children pitter-patter down the stairs, bikes and tricycles in hand, toward Martinez and the other volunteers. By the time the adults get there, the kids are heading back up the stairs to their homes, carefully balancing towers of food in tiny hands. Martinez hands a lunch box to Raymond Rosado, one of the last adults to arrive, before he helps the remaining children look through the toy box. Rosado, 49, said when we met him that he and his family had been living at Great Value Suites for three months. He and his wife used to live in public housing, but after his stepdaughter and her husband arrived from Puerto Rico to stay with them, they had to leave. The extendedstay hotel will continue to be their home until Rosado and his family find one of the most elusive things in the Orlando area: affordable housing. A study released last year by the Harvard Joint Center for Housing Studies shows renters in the Metro Orlando area have a median household income of $35,190, but midpoint rent costs are $1,030. About 56 percent of area renters are considered “rent-burdened,” which means

they spend more than 30 percent of their income on household costs. Renters who spend more than half of what they make on household costs are considered severely rent-burdened, and in Metro Orlando, that’s almost 30 percent of all renters.

In Central Florida, there’s a whole population that’s a fingernail away from falling through the cracks. Renters living paycheck to paycheck have little room to save, leaving them vulnerable to unforeseen events, such as an unexpected hospital visit for a sick child, a broken car or the loss of a job, says Ashley Blasewitz, vice president of marketing and communications at Heart of Florida United Way. That leads to some families having to choose between paying rent, being late on an electricity bill or forgoing a meal. Blasewitz says not only is cost an issue, but so is the availability of affordable housing. United Way’s Asset Limited, Income Constrained, Employed (ALICE) report for 2014 shows the gap in rental stock of affordable housing in Orange, Osceola and Seminole Counties is 95,618 units. “There’s a whole population that’s a fingernail away from falling through the cracks,” she says. “I always find it interesting in the monthly reports we publish that around 40 percent of people who call us are first-time callers. It happens a lot more frequently than you might imagine.” Josette von Birgelen, assistant director of the Heart

of Florida United Way’s 211 help line, says anecdotally she often hears of households where each adult works two jobs, and losing one job can put a whole family in a vicious cycle of late payments. “I want to stress that as soon as a family thinks they may be in trouble financially, reach out for help,” she says. “We’re here 24-7 and you can text, chat and email. Don’t wait until the last moment because of pride or because of not knowing what to do. Families need to educate themselves on the options as soon as possible.” Oren Henry, director of housing and community development for the city of Orlando, says one of the reasons for rent increases in the area is because the cost of building housing has also increased. The city is focusing on demolishing dilapidated housing for new affordable housing sites and on providing rental assistance to the chronically homeless and people who can’t afford their payments. “We’d like to see affordable housing spread across the community, into what works best in neighborhoods,” he says. Raymond Rosado says he and his family are trying to save up enough money to buy a house nearby. With the mass exodus of Puerto Ricans from the island to Central Florida, he often hears of large families, sometimes even groups of friends, who join together to rent or purchase large homes because they can’t afford by themselves. His stepdaughter and her husband earn slightly more than the state minimum wage of $8.05, but he says that the majority of jobs immediately available for recent arrivals start at $8, sometimes $9 per hour in hotels, fast food restaurants and other areas of the tourism industry. Working full time at those wages, an annual salary can be between $16,640 and $18,720. “In the Orlando, Orange County area, it’s really hard to find a house,” he says. “And if you find it, it’s going to be upwards of $1,200 in monthly payments, and for a good neighborhood, over $2,000. And that’s the trick, because people who start at minimum wage, it doesn’t give them enough to get a house.”

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mcordeiro@orlandoweekly.com

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A Gift To OUC Customers PROFESSIONAL ELECTRICAL SERVICES are offering 50 lucky readers*; a 10,000 watt Photovoltaic Solar system, with absolutely NO UPFRONT COST. ZERO, ZIP, NADA, THIS IS NOT A MISPRINT! If you are reading this and you are an OUC electricity user, we want to say thank you. We’d like to say thank you by installing a system that will save you money every month for at least the next 25 years. EVERY FACET OF WHAT WE INSTALL IS WARANTEED TO PERFORM FOR A MINIMUM OF 25 YRS.

How to buy a house for the first time without losing your mind BY THADDEUS MCCOL LU M

ow that you know exactly why renting sucks, let’s talk about all the headaches you’re going to have when you decide you want to buy a house for the first time. Many firsttime home buyers find just starting the process of buying a home daunting, but with a little guidance and determination, you too can join the ranks of homeowners and start complaining about things like “property values” and “mole crickets.” But at least you’re accruing equity, right?

Get your shit together.

The first thing you want to figure out is if you can afford a house. Have a job? Good first step. How much does it pay? (Really, that much? You guys hiring?) Your first clue that you’ve got at least the credit to start the home-buying process are those envelopes from your bank that you’re probably throwing away without opening that say things like “preapproved” and “mortgage” on them. Open one up next time and see how much your bank thinks they can afford to lend you. Then call your bank and see how much they’ll actually lend you. It’ll probably be less, but if they don’t hang up in disgust, it’s a pretty good sign. And as a first-timer, you’re eligible for special programs that lower your mortgage interest rate and down payment. Though if you have that fabled 20 percent down payment saved up, you’re more likely to avoid having to pay mortgage insurance, which is a real kick in the dick once you realize it’s essentially a bet that the lender is making against you being able to pay your mortgage – a bet that you have to pay for.

Find a realtor.

If you’re under the impression that, as a first-time home buyer, you’d be better off without a realtor, you’re wrong. Your realtor is your best friend throughout the entire process. Yes, they get a commission based on how much you spend, but a good realtor will steer you away from trying to spend everything your bank pre-approved you for and into a house that you can actually afford. They also do most of the legwork of house-hunting for you, looking through listings for something that matches your budget and tastes and bringing you out to look at options that they’ve already narrowed down. They’ll also advise you on things that you just won’t think of, like making sure appliances included with the home come with a warranty, or making sure that your potential home isn’t built over a Native American burial ground.

Hope you don’t have carpal tunnel, because you’re going to be signing papers for the next hour.

Don’t fall in love.

You’re going to look at a lot of houses. Like, a lot. And eventually you’ll find one that you think is perfect: good location, good price, good layout. You’ll talk it over with your significant other. You’ll call the realtor to put in an offer. And you’ll get a call back telling you

that a cash buyer has swooped in to yank your dream home out from under you. Cash buyers are us common folk’s worst enemy during the house hunt, sneaking in with their giant sacks of money and snatching up properties that they probably aren’t even going to live in, just to flip them and make a buck. If it makes you feel any better, this happens to so many people that it’s become a cliché. And there’s always another house that’s just as good; maybe even better.

Practice your signature.

So you found a house you love, the seller accepted your offer, the house passed inspection. Congratulations! You’re off to the closing. Hope you don’t have carpal tunnel, because you’re going to be signing papers for the next hour. And if you thought you could get away with that bullshit squiggle you sign your bar tabs with, think again. The bank wants you to sign, in legible cursive, your full first, middle and last name on what seems like 217 sheets of paper. You will never be so conscious of your poor penmanship again in your life.

If you can answer yes to these 3 questions, hurry up and call 407-499-1600 to secure your spot. * In order to qualify you must meet the following criteria. 1. Must be an owner of a single family home. No Condos, Townhouses, Trailers or Apts. 2. Must use OUC for electricity. 3. Must pay annual Federal Income Tax. * All contingent upon approved credit. Although this gift is for OUC customers only, please keep reading and in the very near future we are going to do something similar for our Duke Energy readers.

Join Pinterest.

Now that you own a home, get ready for a never-ending stream of improvement projects, whether it be rearranging the furniture in your living room six or seven times to find the optimal configuration or tearing down a wall in the kitchen to improve the flow from room to room. The possibilities are endless, but Pinterest will give you plenty of ideas of how to keep improving on that home that you thought was perfect – back before you bought it. tmccollum@orlandoweekly.com orlandoweekly.com

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Economist says younger generation will start buying BY R E B E CC A M C KAY

common refrain heard when discussing real estate is that Millennials don’t want to buy houses. They prefer renting in urban markets and will continue to fundamentally shift money away from the suburbs. Take articles like “Millennials Will Live in Cities Unlike Anything We’ve Ever Seen Before,” which ran on Gizmodo last July, or “Young People Can Afford Homes, They Just Don’t Want to Be Homeowners,” from Fortune magazine’s website last August. Jed Kolko, senior fellow at the Terner Center for Housing Innovation, ties this to the decline in marriage rates: “The share of young adults living with their parents increased in 2015,” he writes. “One contributing factor [to their lower home ownership rates] is that 25- to 34-year-olds are decreasingly likely to be married or cohabitating with a partner, and – unsurprisingly – married or cohabitating young adults rarely live with their parents.” Gregg Logan, a managing director at real estate advisers RCL Co., believes this is simply not the case. “It’s media mythology that [Millennials] aren’t in the home market,” says Logan, who also serves as a professor of real estate economics at Rollins College. “When you track home sales by age you find that Millennials bought as many homes as Boomers did last year.” In fact, Millennials make up a third of home buyers. First-time purchasers are down from when their parents were buying their first places in 1981 – from 40 percent to roughly 33 percent now. But this still represents a major segment, and the reasons for the decline are much more related to circumstances than preferences. According to a presentation Logan gave to the Urban Land Institute earlier this year, one factor is that younger people are delaying the noteworthy life decisions that usually precede home purchase, such as getting married or having children.

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This might be due to another contributing aspect: Millennials are saddled with more student debt than any previous generation, and, not coincidentally, the lowest average credit scores. Combine that with coming of age during the Great Recession when unemployment was high and the credit markets suddenly froze, and you have a recipe for a shrinking home market. Most surveys indicate that if the financial situation changes, so will the preferences. For example, the Federal Reserve Bank of New York Survey of Consumer Expectations found that 44 percent of renters believe they will buy when they move within the next three years. Logan sees another reason the percentage of buyers from this generation has dropped. Millennials are the most diverse of any recent generation, with 43 percent identifying as non-white. Yet whites still make up a significant majority in the market. “When you look at black and Hispanic buyers, there has been less wealth creation,” says Logan. “White households have had more generations to create wealth.” “So let’s do the math,” Logan says. If you only look at the effect of people putting off life decisions and add in a new expanded population of people historically without the affluent household income to become buyers, “those two things by themselves mean that demand from that generation is going to be less. “The key thing is that it doesn’t mean [demand] is going to be nothing, which is the impression you get in the media,” says Logan. The narrative is that Millennials are choosing to stay in hip, urbanist neighborhoods out of lifestyle and environmental concerns. Logan agrees they have had influence on certain changes in the building market. However, most surveys indicate that if the financial situation changes, so will the preferences. While mixed-use and urban design are likely here to stay, Logan concludes that the future will look more like the past in terms of home ownership than we’ve been led to believe. “An improving economy, greater access to credit, and the sheer size of this generation of young consumers” means the turnaround is just a matter of time. feedback@orlandoweekly.com

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ARTS & CULTURE

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ARTS & CULTURE

Donne Bitner’s studio at McRae

“Cowboys,” by Donne Bitner

McRae Art Studios moving? As warehouses around the city are demolished, the fate of the longtime artists enclave hangs in the balance BY S E TH KUBERSKY MCRAE ART STUDIOS SPRING OPEN HOUSE 4-10 p.m. Saturday, April 2 | 904 Railroad Ave., Winter Park | mcraeartstudios.com | free

or almost 18 years, McRae Art Studios has operated out of an unassuming railside compound like Winter Park’s cultural equivalent of Willy Wonka’s chocolate factory: closed to the public eye, except for semi-annual open houses, when the visual wonders within are revealed. It will be business as usual when McRae hosts its Spring for Art fine art sale Saturday, April 2, but this could be the last such event this location sees. The 10,620-square-foot warehouse that has served as the artist collective’s home since 1998 is up for sale, with the current owner listing the property for $1.295 million (a

McRae Studios exterior healthy premium over the Orange County appraiser’s 2015 valuation of $372,662). No sale has yet been contracted, and the artists won’t be given notice to vacate until after a deal closes, but whatever the building’s fate is, McRae will live on, according to Stephen Bach. A past president of the group and member since 1998, Bach has been closely involved in the building negotiations since they learned about the sale earlier this year. “We’re not sure of the future … right now we’re still in flux, seeing what our options are,” Bach says. “We have people that have talked about purchasing this building and keeping us in place here, but we don’t really know if anything is coming of that.” Even if it is purchased by a third party, Bach is hopeful McRae might remain, “if it’s someone who wants to invest in the building and keep a stable tenant.” In the meantime, Bach says, “We’ve been looking to see if we can find something that is comparable to this space or better. We’d like a space that has a little more flexibility for us to be able to teach or do workshops or outreach for the community.” There’s one other item on his wish list: “Air conditioning. Part of the problem with the space we’re in is it’s hot in the summer months, and it’s hard for some of us to work.” Whether McRae stays or goes, it will be – like many other artists – at the mercy of Orlando’s rapidly recovering real estate market, which is making warehouse spaces sparse and raising the rents of those that remain. “Property has gotten more expensive, leases are going up, and it puts the squeeze on us,” Bach says. Similar spaces

in the city’s heart are being swallowed up by projects like the Yard at Ivanhoe Village, leaving McRae looking further afield for an affordable home. “We battle for the concept of staying close to the center of the community, which is what we need to bring people to our open houses and do outreach,” Bach says. “If we have to move too far, we’re going to hurt our ability to stay in touch with the community.” If April 2 is the last hurrah for McRae’s long-time home, it should be a memorable one, according to McRae artist and publicist Robert Ross. While he says the single-day spring show “is not as big as the holiday one,” artist Donne Bitner (who designed the event’s postcard) has “a huge reputation nationally,” and South Africa’s Ursula Schwartz is exhibiting “big, abstract paintings like you’d see in New York.” And as always, the Whipple family will be well-represented. Marty Whipple, who co-founded the group in 1987 with her late husband George, says she has been “cranking out” new mixed-media sculptures after nearly a year’s hiatus. And other members of the creative clan will also be on hand, including her son Jim Whipple, who will display his steampunk-style jewelry. No matter what the future holds, Bach insists, “We are still functioning as a group and individual artists here; we aren’t closing McRae.” After all, he says, they had to move three times prior to finding their current home, so they know it can be done. “Even if we do have to find another place to be, we’ll still be together as McRae Art Studios.”

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ARTS & CULTURE

BY SETH KUBERSKY

Orlando experiences an opera renaissance in April with productions by the Orlando Phil and the new Opera Orlando

IMAGE VIA OPERA ORLANDO

Over the last few years, I’ve written about the death and rebirth of opera in Orlando so many times that it’s starting to seem like a sucky Superman sequel. But with two companies offering fully staged operas (complete with live musicians) in April, it appears the classic musical theater art form is battling back from extinction yet again. Orlando’s opera renaissance kicks off with April 1, April 3 and April 5 performances of the Orlando Philharmonic production of Mozart’s The Magic Flute, the composer’s final opera and one of his most beloved. “The imagination of Mozart is ever powerful and overwhelming with his brilliant and classic Magic Flute,” said recently appointed music director Eric Jacobsen in a written statement. “This opera was written and performed just a few months before he died in Vienna. Mozart was painfully aware of his final days to create, and with breathless speed and artistry, pushed out some of his most timeless and staggering works.” Jacobsen is collaborating with stage director Alison Moritz, who comes to Orlando after a season as resident assistant director at the Minnesota Opera. “In this production, we’re exploring some of the inherent humor and drama involved in rehearsing and performing an opera,” Moritz explains in a statement, saying the production drew inspiration from farces like Noises Off and the Marx Brothers’ A Night at the Opera, but also “providing a commentary on the relevance of The Magic Flute today.” The Magic Flute will be performed at the Plaza Live on Bumby Avenue, which the Orlando Philharmonic purchased in 2013 and transformed into its new home.

A renovated movie theater may not seem like the natural environment for an opera, but Moritz compared it to “a contemporary equivalent of the suburban Theater auf der Wieden, where The Magic Flute had its premiere.” The Plaza Live will also host the next two operas on the Orlando Philharmonic’s 2016-2017 schedule: Leonard Bernstein’s Candide in October, and Donizetti’s The Elixir of Love next February. Just weeks after the Phil’s Flute finishes, Opera Orlando arrives with an April 22-24 double feature of comic one-acts, Mozart’s Impresario and Poulenc’s Les Mamelles de Tiresias. Opera Orlando, which was formerly known as Florida Opera Theatre, has a new name to better identify it to local audiences and a new home in the Dr. Phillips Center’s Alexis & Jim Pugh Theater, where it is scheduled to present a full season. Director-in-residence Eric Pinder, who adapted the script from a translation by Josh and Kelsey Shaw, describes the “whimsical, surrealist” show as “ridiculous and beautiful at the same time.” Pinder has updated Mozart’s tale of a struggling opera company with local references, then used it as a framing device for Poulenc’s 1917 genderbending satire about a woman who discards her breasts while her husband births thousands of babies. “It plays with language and gender roles in society, and a lot of it is very subversive,” says Pinder. “There are a lot of sexual puns that I refused to translate,

because I don’t want to get in trouble!” Previously, the former Florida Opera Theatre and Orlando Philharmonic had collaborated on presentation, but don’t interpret their separate productions now as a sign of schism. Pinder says he’d “love to work with them, [and I] hope we can develop a working relationship,” and you’ll spot several of the same singers in both shows. And even without the Phil’s resources, Opera Orlando will utilize an orchestra of 16 live musicians to accompany their performance. “We really need to get younger people involved in opera,” Pinder explains, addressing the inevitable issue of aging opera audiences. “You’re always going to have the diehard opera fans, [but] what we need is for young people to come in who don’t yet think of opera as an exciting art form and be transformed.” To that end, Opera Orlando is exploring a “bring your own venue” performance at the Orlando Fringe and other site-specific works to bring opera out of its traditional venues. “It’s very important for people to understand that it’s not just sort of museum piece,” Pinder concludes. That’s a sentiment echoed by Moritz, who says, “Opera and classical music are not only art; they’re entertainment.” Don’t pop the champagne quite yet, but if these two productions prove successful, local opera fans may be in a merry mood by May. skubersky@orlandoweekly.com orlandoweekly.com

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FOOD & DRINK

tip jar

[ restaurant review ]

BY FAIYAZ KARA AND JESSICA BRYCE YOUNG

Food Truck Fridays launched March 25 at the Seneff Arts Plaza in front of the Dr. Phillips Center for the Arts. Expect two trucks from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. every Friday through May 13. Mark Dollard, former chef of Absinthe Bistro, is helming the kitchen in the soon-to-open 24-hour diner Red Mug. The diner will offer breakfast classics like hash & eggs and biscuits & gravy round the clock, as well as blue-plate standards like meatloaf and pot pie. Good news, taco fans: Black Rooster Taqueria will now be open on Sundays. Marc Kusche, former executive chef of Hamilton’s Kitchen at the Alfond Inn, is now executive chef at the Lake Nona Country Club.

Standard deviation Highly touted diner presents enjoyably embellished comfort-food classics BY FAIYAZ KARA METRO DINER 985 N. State Road 434, Altamonte Springs | 407-917-8997 | metrodiner.com | $$

PHOTOS BY ROB BARTLETT

hen the Metro Diner rode into town with all its Guy Fieri hype in tow, the residents of Altamonte Springs got rightfully jacked at the prospect of chowing down on downhome fare that promised to be, to use a Fieri-ism, off the hook. The awards, accolades and buzz garnered by the original diner in Jacksonville led to an expansion across Florida and into the Southeast, Northeast and Midwest in an effort to chase the chain dream. The Altamonte outpost, stripped of the fuss and glamour central to the space’s previous tenant, Carmel Kitchen & Wine Bar, wholly embodies a sort of Depression-era feel – Formica tables, counter seating, checkerboard floor and all – which I unexpectedly found to my liking. The dishes, however, didn’t exactly have us riding the bus to Flavortown and, OK, the Fieri-isms will henceforth cease. Breakfast, on which Metro Diner’s laurels have rested, delivers some of the more enjoyable eats, the not-great hamburger steak and eggs ($9.49) notwithstanding. The thick burger, desiccated to the core

and nowhere near the requested medium, looked as though it was a parched victim of a fierce Santa Ana wind, with the accompanying biscuit an unfortunate side casualty. Roasted potatoes and perfectly poached eggs were, thankfully, spared the scorching. From the griddled offerings, our charming, capable and good-natured server suggested we order the croissant French toast ($9.99), a favorite of hers. There was too much cinnamon in the batter for my taste, but other than that, the sugary croissant halves make a rich, buttery start (or dessert ending) to your day. Our server was even nice enough to bring us real maple syrup at no extra charge – it was a darker, more robust syrup as opposed to a more desirable golden or amber-colored syrup, but still, it was a nice touch. Pecans, almonds and walnuts provided a nice crunch to the appropriately named “nutty waffle” ($8.99) – a Metro Diner signature item, and a fluffy one at that. Breakfast, by the way, is served all day, so don’t feel weird about ordering the Egg McMuffin-esque A.M. Sandwich ($3.79) in the p.m. hours. A toasted English muffin with fried egg, cheddar cheese and Canadian bacon can be eaten any time of day. From the list of lunch favorites, the

Pittsburgh sandwich ($12.49) came highly recommended by said server, primarily because “it’s fun to see people try to eat it.” Indeed, the thick slabs of Chicago bread stuffed with copious amounts of pastrami, provolone, a fried egg and French fries really gave the ol’ mandible a workout. If you’re hankering for another substantial plate, the Metro pot roast ($9.99) is all about quantity. Quality, not so much. The braised beef was as dry as the hamburger steak, while the broth was like a liquid salt lick. It seriously gave us the shivers. The mashed potatoes were the only saving grace. Look, Metro Diner isn’t trying to reinvent comfort food fare. Rather, they’re making a go of replicating the old-time diner by serving spiffed-up classics. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don’t, but judging from the hordes who patiently wait for seats here, they do more than enough to bring them back. fkara@orlandoweekly.com

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OPENINGS Ocean Sun Brewing has opened at last in the old Southern Moon Smokehouse and Brewery space on Curry Ford Road … Loudmouth Burger will open soon in the former Whataburger space on John Young Parkway … Pizza@ Lake Eola will open its third location on East Central Boulevard. Other locations are in Tavares and Artegon Marketplace … More pizza news: Cottage Inn Pizza will open in the University Shoppes near UCF this spring … Bar Louie will open on South Semoran Boulevard near the airport later this spring … Armando’s College Park is targeting April 11 as an opening date. CLOSINGS Coffee Culture in the North Quarter has closed. EVENTS Pedalpalooza and Pancake Breakfast is Saturday, April 9, with proceeds going to benefit Ivanhoe Village and the addition of new bike racks on North Orange Avenue. The family friendly six-mile bike ride culminates with a pancake breakfast at This N That Eats. Cost is $15 … The fourth annual Wine & Craft Brew Festival of Winter Garden is also April 9, from 3-7 p.m., in the parking lot of Regency Wine & Liquor. Tickets are $30 … Seito Sushi Sand Lake and Red Cypress Brewery collaborate on a six-course dinner Thursday, April 28. Red Cypress head brewer Garrett Ward will create a seasonal release specifically for the dinner, with meals being prepared by Seito executive chef Sengchan Inthisack. The $65 ticket includes an amuse-bouche reception. Got restaurant dish? Send tips to dining@orlandoweekly.com

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FOOD & DRINK

BY JESSICA BRYCE YOUNG

Orlando abounds in fantastic cheap eats – welcome to our monthly roundup of places to get lunch for less than $10. If you’ve got a 10 Under $10 suggestion for us, send it to jyoung@orlandoweekly.com. BB Junction

Mama B’s Giant Subs

2103 W. Fairbanks Ave., Winter Park, 407-513-4134, bbjunction.com We are starting off this month with a bit of a cheat – BB Junction is not a “cheap eats” kinda place. But even if one of their burgers would break your $10 bank, you can get your paws on their BB grilled cheese with brie, goat cheese, herb aioli, watercress and peach jam for just $7.

692 N. Orange Ave., 407-422-7353; 1101 S. Orange Ave., 407-649-7808 Mama B’s is old-school: no website, no credit cards and no back-talk, please. They’re not kidding about the giant subs, either – $6.81 for a whole or $3.99 for a half. We like the egg salad, made in-house, and the salami. Ask (politely) for a toasted roll.

Black Rooster

2603 E. South St., 407-613-5968, marketonsouth.com We’re partial to the BBQ jackfruit tacos, but a pair plus a side will run you $11. So go for the TLT ($10) instead: smoky tempeh “bacon” with heirloom tomatoes and greens on lemonmayo-doused Texas toast.

1323 N. Mills Ave., 407-601-0994, blackroostertaqueria.com Again, this isn’t really a “cheap eats” place – Black Rooster is bringing a farm-to-table approach to Mexican classics; this ain’t Del Taco. But an achiote pork taco, a veggie shiitake-and-zucchini taco and a meatball sope (beef-pork-pinto bean, with black mole and white cabbage) adds up to a delicious $10 lunch.

Empire Szechuan 341 N. Orange Ave., 407-839-1236, orlandoempireszechuan.com Longtime downtown favorite is best known for its crazy-cheap lunch special: $5.87 for a generous blob of your favorite stir-fry with barbecue-pork fried rice and a can of soda. If you have a few extra minutes to wait, order a less-popular dish and they’ll wok-toss it fresh rather than serve from the steam table.

Java Lava 47 E. Robinson St., 407-770-1888, javalavacoffeeshops.com Nothing on the wide menu of sandwiches, salads and more breaks $10, but our favorite is the basil, mozzarella and tomato panini ($7.30), pressed with aioli and balsamic vinegar.

Leo’s Diner 333 N. Orange Ave., 407-423-5367 A classic diner serving “home style comfort food,” Leo’s is like a trip back in time. The patty melt with fries, cole slaw or baked beans is just $7.95, but packs a punch.

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Market on South

Mynt 535 W. New England Ave., Winter Park, 407-636-7055, myntorlando.com Mynt’s lunch special is a great deal. A samosa, lentil soup, steamed basmati rice and your curry of choice are brought in a tiffin (a layered metal lunch pail) and unlatched at the table; papadum, naan and dessert are served separately. If you choose one of the eight vegetarian curries, you’re out for $9 plus tip.

Nha Trang Subs 1216 E. Colonial Drive, 407-346-4549 Some of the best and cheapest banh mi in Mills 50 are found here – super crisp baguettes make the difference, but the $3.50 to $4.50 price range doesn’t hurt, either. Traditionalists won’t go wrong with the dac biet, but step out and try the fried fish paste if you’re adventurous. Cash only.

Tacos El Rancho multiple locations, tacoselrancho.com We like the Hoffner Avenue location, but we are usually downtown around lunchtime, so that’s where we order our enchiladas verde – two baked enchiladas with rice and beans for $7.75. There’s also a selection of Mexican beers, plus house-made rumchata.

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FOOD & DRINK

EDITED BY JESSICA BRYCE YOUNG

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The price range generally reflects the average cost of one dinner entree. Bakeries, ice cream shops, etc. reflect relative cost for one person. Search hundreds more reviews at orlandoweekly.com

Morimoto Asia Throngs clamor inside this palatial Disney Springs resto for a Morimoto sighting, but ultimately settle for pricey, well-executed, pan-Asian eats. Rock shrimp tempura, braised black cod, duck ramen and Peking duck wow. While sushi doesn’t have a starring role here, spicy yellowtail rolls and etheral otoro are wonderful. Pairing meals with potent potables is an easy exercise with plenty of sakes, beers and wine from which to choose. Reservations are recommended, though the second-floor Forbidden Lounge is a draw for the walkup diner. Open daily for lunch and dinner. Disney Springs, 1600 E. Buena Vista Blvd., Lake Buena Vista, 407-939-6686; $$$$

Market on South Vegan fare: It’s not just for vegans anymore, as this gathering ground for herbivores and omnivores alike demonstrates. In the mornings, lines form out the door for Valhalla Bakery’s ridiculously delicious square doughnuts, while nighttime hours see many chowing down on Dixie Dharma’s vegan victuals – tasty tacos, Carolina BBQ pulled jackfruit and Georgia peach sloppy joes, for example. Cultured beverages by Humble Bumble kombucha are also offered, as are wines from Quantum Leap and rotating draft beers. Open daily. 2603 E. South St., 407-613-5968; $$

Urbain 40 French Colonial brasserie with a swing-era vibe is a stunner, and the high price you’ll pay to enjoy the French fare is well worth the wallet crimp. Chef Jean-Stephane Poinard’s mushroomy crêpe urbain is reflective of native Lyonnaise cuisine, but others, like stellar bouillabaise and duck three ways, showcase his regional chops. Steak frites, while pricey, wholly satisfies. Pastry chef Amanda McFall does no wrong, be it macarons, truffles, tortes or potent baba au rhum. Disappointing: No French wines are offered by the glass, and comparatively few by the bottle. Open daily. 8000 Via Dellagio Way, 407-872-2640; $$$$ ■

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ORLANDO WEEKLY

FILM

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FILM

FILM LISTINGS Bad Movie Club: The Creeping Terror Laugh

at failed acting, tacky special effects, cheesy dialogue and choppy editing. Wednesday, 7 pm; Alafaya Library, 12000 E. Colonial Drive; free; 407-835-7323. Bitter Seeds India has more farmers than any country in the world, and they are in an unprecedented crisis after switching to genetically modified seeds. Wednesday, 2 pm; Southeast Museum of Photography, Daytona State College, Daytona Beach; free; 386-506-4475; smponline.org. Date Night Movie: Insurgent Enjoy an outdoor movie in a beautiful garden. Blankets or chairs are recommended. You may bring a dinner picnic basket. Alcohol is permitted. Friday, 6 pm; Harry P. Leu Gardens, 1920 N. Forest Ave.; $6; 407-246-2620; leugardens.org. Embrace of the Serpent In the early 1900s, a young shaman in the Colombian Amazon helps a sick German explorer and his local guide search for a rare healing plant. Opens Friday; Enzian Theater, 1300 S. Orlando Ave., Maitland; $11; 407-629-0054; enzian.org. Filmmaker Workshop A workshop for

PHOTO BY ANDRÉS CÓRDOBA, COURTESY OF OSCILLOSCOPE

Union of the snake Embrace of the Serpent challenges some Western ideals – like the impulse to protect indigenous peoples who neither need nor want our protection BY MARYANN JOHA N SON

Embrace of the Serpent

★★★★★

ecades apart, two white scientists delve into the Amazonian rainforest in search of a rare plant with medicinal and hallucinatory qualities, with the assistance of a local shaman on opposite ends of his own life journey. Embrace of the Serpent attempts to frame the destruc-

tion of the rainforest’s ecology and peoples as a slow-motion tragedy on scales both personal and cultural, but it is more intriguing in its ambitions, which frustrate it, than in its successes, which are limited. Colombian filmmaker Ciro Guerra and his cinematographer, David Gallego, shoot in black-and-white, which is at once visually distinctive but also rather flattening, as if we are not meant to see the beautiful landscape in its full glory … and maybe we aren’t, in the hopes (perhaps) that we will focus on the tribal cultures being destroyed by invading Europeans and Americans. But those cultures are only glimpsed sideways, via shaman Karamakate (played as a young

aspiring filmmakers on how to pitch a script or idea. Sunday, 10 am; Enzian Theater, 1300 S. Orlando Ave., Maitland; free; 407-629-0054; enzian.org. man by Nilbio Torres, and as an old man by Antonio Bolivar), the last of his tribe, as he reluctantly guides German ethnologist Theo (Jan Bijvoet), in the early 1900s, and American botanist Evan (Brionne Davis), in the 1940s, on what become tours of cultural ruination. There are moments that are briskly challenging to Western ideals – including the impulse on the part of some to protect indigenous peoples, who may not necessarily want protection from everything the larger world has to offer – and other moments that descend into abject silliness. (One 1940s scene set in a Christian mission that has descended into “the worse of both worlds” is more like Green Inferno-esque schlock horror than the would-be mind-trip of the rest of the film.) It’s true that this was inspired by the real-life travel and exploration diaries of Theodor Koch-Grunberg, a German, and Richard Evans Schultes, an American, but this does keep Serpent’s perspective rather distant from the very people it is meant to be enlightening us about.

The Mermaid Part romantic comedy, part slapstick, part urban eco-fantasy and part social farce, this is a weird and funny original that must be seen to be believed. Through Thursday; Enzian Theater, 1300 S. Orlando Ave., Maitland; $11; 407-629-0054; enzian.org. Titicut Follies This documentary film

is a stark and graphic portrayal of the conditions that existed at the State Prison for the Criminally Insane at Bridgewater, Massachusetts, in 1967. Wednesday, 7:30 pm; Southeast Museum of Photography, Daytona State College, Daytona Beach; free; 386-506-4475; smponline.org. The Walking Dead Sunday Night Watch Party Enjoy drink specials while

watching your favorite zombie show. Sundays, 9 pm; The Falcon, 819 E. feedback@orlandoweekly.com Washington St; free; 407-423-3060.

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ORLANDO WEEKLY

FILM

OPENING IN ORLANDO

Collide

Everybody Wants Some!!

BY STE V E S C H N E I DE R

OPENING IN ORLANDO Collide This spring’s releases are looking like a Relativity Media fire sale, with titles that were left in limbo by the company’s bankruptcy finally making it to theaters via other means. This one is a crime/suspense drama that has Anthony Hopkins and Ben Kingsley as big-time gangsters and Nicholas Hoult as a lower-level criminal caught between them. Result: a lot of desperate, pedal-to-the-metal driving of which even Jason Statham might approve, The automotively oriented flick was previously known as Autobahn, which is one of those titles you’re going to have to change to get distribution in America, whether your distributor is in Chapter 11 or not. (PG-13) Everybody Wants Some!! Richard Linklater’s new comedy is kind of a successor to both Dazed and Confused and Boyhood, with an

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overwhelmed young hero arriving for his first day of college in 1980 and finding a whole crew of compatriots who say a lot by doing stuff that looks like not very much at all. Oh, and they’re all members of the school’s baseball team, which kind of makes this also a follow-up to Linklater’s Bad News Bears remake if you want to get really technical. Expect more sublimely recalled art direction and music choices, including the Van Halen stomper that lends the film its title. (Of course, the best-ever use of “Everybody Wants Some!!” was in Savage Steve Holland’s Better Off Dead. But not everybody gets to share the screen with dancing claymation hamburgers – something you should probably ask John Cusack about at next month’s MegaCon, just to see how quickly that pretentious old poop changes the subject.) (R)

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ORLANDO WEEKLY

MUSIC

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MUSIC

The shriek goes on The MultipleTap tour is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to see the best in Japanese noise BY THADDEUS MCCOLLUM MULTIPLETAP TOUR 8 p.m. Friday, April 1 | Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave. | willspub.org | $15

PHOTO OF HIJOKAIDEN VIA MULTIPLETAP TOUR

n 1975, Lou Reed released Metal Machine Music, a double LP consisting of only four tracks, one per side, comprised of screeching feedback and echoing guitar loops. While rock critic Lester Bangs referred to it as “the greatest record ever made in the history of the human eardrum,” most critics hated it. It deliberately eschewed any semblance of musical structure in favor of grating noise, and was seen as a giant “fuck you” from Reed to his label, RCA. The original pressing of the album was deleted from their catalog after a mere three weeks. But there was one market where Metal Machine Music really caught on: Japan. Rob Bowman writes in the liner notes to the Lou Reed boxed set Between Thought and Expression that when Reed visited Japan to meet with record company executives, he was greeted at the airport with the squawks of Metal Machine Music blaring through the public address system. Masami Akita, better known as Merzbow, one of the progenitors of the Japanese noise scene, gave a nod to Reed when he titled his first experimental noise recordings Metal Acoustic Music. This week, the MultipleTap Tour makes a stop at Will’s Pub, bringing with it stalwarts of “Japanoise.” Many of these artists have

never played in the U.S. before, giving historic weight to the packed lineup. Headlining the tour are noise legends Hijokaidan (translated as “emergency stairway” or “fire escape”), formed in 1979 by Jojo Hiroshige. The abrasiveness of Hijokaidan’s music was mirrored by their early performances, which often devolved into rolling around on stage floors, throwing food and garbage, and even urinating on stage, though in recent years they’ve toned down the antics and focused on creating catharsis from guitar feedback, electronic manipulation and reverb-drenched screaming. If that doesn’t sound like an enjoyable musical experience to you, you’re not alone. Noise as a genre is often dismissed as, well, noise. But those who dismiss it for not having recognizable song structures are often missing the point. Sure, this isn’t stuff you’re likely to listen to in your car (though some do). Noise is infinitely more enjoyable in a live setting, where the visceral thrill of sonic assault combines with inventive staging and instrumentation in a framework where spontaneity and pushing sound to the absolute limits of volumes and extremity are the guiding rules. No two performances are the same, dropping noise artists squarely in the realm of free jazz and theater rather than rock. After artists like Merzbow, C.C.C.C. and Hijokaidan laid the groundwork, the avant-garde noise scene in Japan flour-

ished, producing acts like Atsuhiro Ito, also on this tour, who brings a unique visual element to his performances with an instrument crafted from a fluorescent light tube that he calls the “Optron.” That visual element is also utilized by tourmates UCNV, who creates art out of corrupted image and audio files, and Yousuke Fuyama, who creates swirling monochromatic images whose shapes are directly tied to the sound waves he manipulates during a performance. The most recent generation of noise artists from Japan have expanded the palette of the scene, and are represented on the MultipleTap Tour. Hatis Noit, a classically trained female vocalist, eschews the abrasiveness and feedback associated with the noise scene, and instead focuses on using layered loops, projected images and her own often operatic voice to create a sense of mystery, mood and beauty. And though Avandoned borrows Hijokaidan’s Jojo Hiroshige to provide feedback for live performances of their single “Feedback Friday,” the girl group is more focused on a J-pop aesthetic than on confrontational art. Just as Metal Machine Music inspired a generation of Japanese musicians to experiment with static, feedback and noise, they have in turn inspired a new generation of American musicians. Jeff Carey, also on the MultipleTap tour, is a Baltimore artist who has built a video game controller-inspired rig to manipulate blasts of squelching static, insect-like clicks and strobe lights that assault the senses. Carey has found plenty of fans in Japan, visiting there with fellow American glitch enthusiasts Matmos in 2015 for a tour presented by MultipleTap. Two of the supporting acts on the Orlando leg of the tour also wear their love of Japan’s noisy legacy on their sleeves: Lakeland project Hell Garbage and Jacksonville’s the Caution Children. While the Caution Children are informed more by the drones and swells of Japanese post-hardcore group Envy, Hell Garbage is a direct descendant of the Japanese noise aesthetic, incorporating circuit-bending, overdriven effects pedals, feedback and occasionally self-abuse as performance art from Kat Roberts of Norse Shit Band. Indeed, breaking down the emotional barriers that audiences bring with them to shows is one of the hallmarks of an effective noise performance. The line between audience and artist thins, with the audience – and how they experience and react to the overwhelming sound, spectacle and confrontation – in effect becoming part of the performance. The only certain thing is that a lineup like this one is unlikely to come through town again. tmccollum@orlandoweekly.com orlandoweekly.com

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GREAT LIVE MUSIC RATTLES ORLANDO EVERY NIGHT Old Again These locals took a hiatus last year, but came back with an aggressive new sound and new singer earlier this month, putting the hardcore back in post-hardcore. 6 p.m. Wednesday, March 30, at the Space Station, $5

Morris Day and the Time Check your hair in a full-length mirror before this intimate performance by the Minneapolis R&B powerhouse who played Prince’s main rival in Purple Rain. 6:30 p.m. Thursday, March 31, at the Velvet Bar, Hard Rock Hotel, $29-$50

Bonerama This New Orleans funk band takes their name from their triple trombone attack, not from any other sort of “bone,” if you were wondering. 7 p.m. Friday, April 1, at Backbooth, $15

T-Pain The rappa ternt sanga stops in to Universal’s Mardi Gras to preview songs from his upcoming album, Stoicville: The Phoenix. Might be time to reinstall that “I Am T-Pain” app on your phone. 8:30 p.m. Saturday, April 2, at Universal Studios, price of admission

Gláss This post-punk trio from Athens, Georgia, take the goth-rock template and pick it apart to let some light shine into its moody corners. 9 p.m. Sunday, April 3, at Spacebar, $5

Mainland Check out this young Britpopinformed NYC band for free at Park Ave CDs before they open for Melanie Martinez at House of Blues. 2 p.m. Monday, April 4, at Park Ave CDs, free

Blackbird Blackbird Mikey Maramag’s solo project rode the chill wave to popularity at the beginning of the decade, but continues to push the genre into new and interesting places, combining indie-rock experimentation with danceﬂoor sensibilities. 7:30 p.m. Tuesday, April 5, at Will’s Pub, $10-$12

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RUN RIVER NORTH BY B AO L E - H U U

PHOTO BY MICHAEL LOTHROP

Warning: This is about to get a

little ethnic and meta. I didn’t walk in with that intention but the forces just aligned. Here goes. Run River North (March 24, the Social) is a six-member L.A. band constituted entirely of Korean-Americans. The Asian storyline is inevitable. And then there’s me, a card-carrying Asian-American, who’s now filtering it. Add everything up and it all feels pretty loaded. But I’m gonna run with it because us Asians have relatively little occasion to do so, and this band is an unusual situation. Asians aren’t the biggest minority group in America and are, by now, assimilated well enough to not shock the optics any more. But there’s something particularly conspicuous about Run River North. To see an all-Asian group not based in Asia that’s not a self-parodic marketing gimmick (thanks, Far East Movement) is glaring in its own way. They could easily pass for one with their eugenic looks – I saw at least four members onstage that my girlfriend would leave me for – but they’re an earnest band, and a pretty good and accomplished one at that. Instead of the usual genres in which Asians have historically distinguished themselves, Run River North deals in youthful, elegant indie pop with folk and chamber leanings that’s in line with acts like Of Monsters and Men, Radical Face and the Lumineers. Live, they’re much more rock, which suits me even better. It’s a sound and aesthetic that’s got immense commercial appeal in a way

that’s neither cheap nor trips the gag reflex. Everything they do is with exceptional verve and precision, and they delivered a substantial and enjoyable show. And even if their middle-left sensibility is too vanilla for you, you’ve gotta give the drummer credit for the Death From Above shirt he wore onstage here. As perhaps little as being in the middle

To see an all-Asian group not based in Asia that’s not a self-parodic marketing gimmick (thanks, Far East Movement) is glaring in its own way. represents artistically, it means something considerable socially. Although the band itself is an ethnic phenomenon, their sizable following isn’t. From what I could see at this show, I was one of only a few Asians in attendance. What all this equals is something that shatters a good deal of the stereotypes I grew up with.

THE BEAT

Sick of the ’90s yet? That decade’s style is omnipresent these days. I heard JNCO jeans are even making a little comeback or some shit like that. Good lord. But, though I may be a little sick of typing that number from all these acts I’ve

been seeing of late, I’m not over hearing those nostalgic sounds quite yet. Regarding indie rock specifically, a field currently saturated with revivalism, it so happens that a lot of it is good with bands like Bully, Waxahatchee, Swearin’ and Potty Mouth on the scene. Well, the steady rise of Tancred, the brainchild of singer-guitarist Jess Abbott, to join these new-school leaders of the old school is just about to make a big, certified leap with the upcoming April 1 release of their muscular, realized new album (Out of the Garden). Anyone who picked it up at the merch table at their recent Orlando debut (March 21, the Social) knows what I’m talking about. In addition to being their first issued on the credpacked Polyvinyl label, the record also boasts production from Anna Waronker (That Dog) and Steven McDonald (Redd Kross/Off!). At the show, Tancred was a little out of step with the rest of the lineup, which was heavy on the feels with emo-leaning bands like Foxing and O’Brother. But in a tight, beefy 30 minutes on stage, Abbott’s trio proved their worth as probably the most notable upstart on the bill, even if they were third on the marquee. Exactly like the new album, Tancred’s live pulse is a cranked drive that delivers a welltuned combo of powerful, chewy guitars and sweetly skewed melody. And for fans of the final wave of real alternative rock – before that term lost all meaning (and legitimacy) – Tancred is manna. baolehuu@orlandoweekly.com orlandoweekly.com

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Thursday, March 31

San Holo MUSIC

OUR PICKS FOR THE BEST EVENTS THIS WEEK

Wednesday, March 30

The Roast of Sean Finnerty COMEDY

JONATHAN COULTON

Wednesday, March 30

Ask Me Another

National Public Radio listeners in Orlando have enjoyed a renaissance of in-person appearances in recent years, from David Sedaris and Ira Glass to “Wait Wait … Don’t Tell Me!” with Peter Sagal. The New York-based quiz show “Ask Me Another,” which is recording at the Bob Carr on Wednesday night, hasn’t been broadcasting on 90.7 FM as long as some NPR favorites, but it’s rapidly attracted fans with host Ophira Eisenberg’s deadpan delivery of the devious puzzles and Jonathan Coulton’s Weird Al-worthy musical clues. Special guests at the Orlando taping will include Dirty Jobs host Mike Rowe, NASA scientist Gioia Massa and NASA landing and recovery director Melissa Jones. The best seats went early to NPR subscribers, but some are still for sale to the general public; snag one so you can impress your friends Groundhog Day-style by knowing all the answers when the episode airs. – Seth Kubersky 7:30 p.m. | Bob Carr Theater, 401 W. Livingston St. | 844-513-2014 | wmfe.org | $30

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8 p.m. | Spacebar, 2428 E. Robinson St. | facebook.com/spacebarorlando | $5 suggested donation

10 p.m. | The Social, 54 N. Orange Ave. | 407-246-1419 | thesocial.org | $10-$20

JONATHAN COULTON PHOTO BY BILL WADMAN

EVENTS

The Orlando comedy scene has been hit hard by success. Through sheer stubbornness, local comics created a network of open mic nights, showcases and even an annual festival over the past few years where they could improve their craft, take risks and learn how to be better performers. But as our local comedians get better, their sights are drawn to other, bigger cities. In the last few months, we’ve lost Tom Feeney to Atlanta, Clayton Anderson to Washington, D.C., and Preacher Lawson to Los Angeles. Now Sean Finnerty, Orlando’s funniest Irish comic, is headed to New York City, the place he first landed when he arrived in the States. To send him off, a big group of his peers – including Tommy O’Neill, Marie George and “Tom and Dan”’s Ross McCoy – are going to tear the everloving shit out of him. Expect some sparks to fly as the comics come up with their most creative insults for Finnerty – we anticipate enough anti-Irish sentiment to make us think we’re in the 1850s – but each comic will also have to endure jabs from the others as well. Tears may be shed in the end, but they’ll more likely be from having to say goodbye to a friend than from hurt feelings. – Thaddeus McCollum

If, during the haze of Miami’s Ultra Music Festival two weeks ago, you remember bumping to the futuristic beats of Dutch DJ-producer San Holo, here’s your chance to hear him again. The 25-year-old San Holo – real name Sander Van Dijck – is coming to the Social this Thursday. Probably best known for his remix of Dr. Dre’s “The Next Episode,” which currently has close to 85 million views on YouTube, San Holo’s sonic mix of trap and bass brings experimentation within EDM to a new level. – Monivette Cordeiro

Friday-Sunday, April 1-3

Sunday, April 3

Spooky Empire Retro Con

Poca’s Hottest Sauce Cook Off

EVENTS

For the most part, cons are filled to the brim with geeksphere entertainment. Daleks weave around a countless array of Supernatural and Harry Potter cosplayers while anime art is sold at every corner. There’s more to life than pop culture, however, and Spooky Empire’s Retro Con is here to serve. While the April rendition of the event is a much smaller version than the main October one, there’s still plenty to capture a horror lover’s eye. Line up to meet shock rocker Alice Cooper or Nightmare on Elm Street’s Heather Langenkamp, among other celebrity guests, but remember to set some money aside to explore booths that sell everything from clothing to home decor to sometimes even coffee. Between the costume contest and the traditional Zombie Walk, you’ll find something for your dark, macabre heart to fawn over. – Kim Slichter

Whether you like your sauce smoky, sweet or hotter than hell, Poca’s Hottest Sauce Cook Off is the place to find the flavors you’ve been craving. This annual parking lot party features local craft vendors, live music and all the hot sauce you can handle. You’ll have to splurge on a tasting ticket to try the cookoff competition entries, but there’s a complimentary taco bar included with admission. Poca’s is known for its themed condiments inspired by local musicians and artists, and many of them, including Rocketfish, Jessy Lynn Martens and FunkUs, plan to perform at the party. But the real way to warm up your insides won’t be with Fiddle Fire sauce, but with a donation to the cook off’s fundraiser for Fern Creek Elementary School’s food bank, which also allows guests to score the hot deal of $5 off admission by bringing along nonperishable food items. – Deanna Ferrante

5 p.m. Friday, 11 a.m. Saturday-Sunday | Wyndham Orlando Resort, 8001 International Drive | spookyempire.com | $35-$65

with Thomas Olivia Wynn, Kaleigh Baker, Terri Binion, Jessy Lynn Martens, Rocketﬁsh, Milka 1 p.m. | Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave. | willspub.org | $12

Friday, April 1

Vanya and Sonia and Masha and Spike THEATER

Christopher Durang takes on Anton Chekhov in this comedy at Orlando Shakes. Durang, known for his biting absurdism, won the Tony Award for Best Play in 2013 for this mashup of Chekhovian characters and themes. Vanya (a name borrowed from Chekhov’s play Uncle Vanya, along with significant portions of the plot) and his sister Sonia live on an estate in rural Pennsylvania, supported financially by their movie-star sister, Masha. When Masha returns home unexpectedly with her young boyfriend in tow, the siblings’ lives get thrown into upheaval for a weekend that includes a costume party, striptease, infidelity and voodoo. Arrive early on opening night for hors d’oeuvres and a brief chat with director Eleanor Holdridge to gain some insight, but as Ben Brantley of the New York Times wrote, “Even if you’ve never read a word of Chekhov, you’re likely to find plenty to make you laugh.” – TM pre-show 6:15 p.m.; show 7:30 p.m. | through May 1 | Orlando Shakespeare Theater, 812 E. Rollins St. | 407-447-1700 | orlandoshakes.org | $21-$46

Sunday, April 3

Reflecting Florida: Storytelling Through Image and Word JACUZZI BOYS PHOTO BY CHRISTIAN LOPEZ-MIRO

LITERARY

We sometimes worry that we’re heaping too much on Bookmark It’s shoulders. The indie bookstore inside East End Market takes up less space than the magazine area at a Barnes & Noble, yet they manage to fit in a wide assortment of books by local authors alongside a well-curated selection of buzzy new novels, memoirs, cookbooks, kids’ books and more. Plus, they host an almost constant stream of events and programs – like this one, a continuation of their Reflecting Florida series. It’s a double launch for two new nonfiction books that shine a light on very different facets of the state. Gary Monroe takes on a fascinating but lesser-known Floridian artist of the 1900s in E.G. Barnhill: Florida Photographer, Adventurer, Entrepreneur, showing how Barnhill created the nation’s imagined vision of Florida with his tourist photos and postcards – you’ll recognize these sunsets and swamps, with their bumped-up colors and hazy contours. In Forty: Newspaper Stories 1970-2014, Jeff Kunerth collects 40 of his most arresting stories from a career as a reporter at a daily newspaper. Both authors will be on hand for a discussion moderated by local historian Rick Kilby, and will sign books and answer questions after the talk. – Jessica Bryce Young 1 p.m. | Bookmark It, East End Market, 3201 Corrine Drive | 407-389-9870 | bookmarkitorlando.com | free

Monday, April 4

Jacuzzi Boys MUSIC

Miami-based power trio Jacuzzi Boys deal in a strain of garage rock that attempts to assimilate both the big hooks of Big Star and the tuneful nihilism of Jay Reatard. But, as one would expect from a band whose name references the hot tub of choice of the ’80s, the party-hardy antics are turned up to an almost ridiculous degree in the live arena. And it’s live where their sun-dazed freakouts come into the proper focus. The Boys are in the midst of a brief Southern jaunt to commemorate the vinyl release of their Happy Damage EP on their own Mag Mag imprint. Summer is for all intents and purposes already here in Florida, so why not make a night of it? – Matthew Moyer with the Woolly Bushmen, Tight Genes | 8 p.m. | The Social, 54 N. Orange Ave. | 407-246-1419 | thesocial.org | $10

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THE WEEK

THEWEEK

submit your events to listings@orlandoweekly.com at least 12 days before print to have them included

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 30-TUESDAY, APRIL 5 COMPILED BY THADDEUS MCCOLLUM

WEDNESDAY, MARCH 30

CONCERTS/EVENTS Badparker, I’m an Intestine, Deadmeat, Burn to Learn 9 pm; Uncle Lou’s Entertainment Hall, 1016 N. Mills Ave.; $4; 407-270-9104. Dave Matthews Tribute Band 7:30 pm; House of Blues, Disney Springs, Lake Buena Vista; $8.75; 407-934-2583. Eugene Snowden’s Ten Pints of Truth 10 pm; Lil Indies, 1036 N. Mills Ave.; free. The Imperial’s Acoustic Soundcheck With Caiti Patton 8 pm; The Imperial at Washburn Imports, 1800 N. Orange Ave.; free; 407-228-4992. The New Sam Rivers’ RivBea Orchestra 9 pm; Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave.; $7-$10. Oriented Music Group Open Jam 10:45 pm; St. Matthew’s Tavern, 1300 N. Mills Ave.; free. Reggae Night with Hor!zen and DJ Red I 10 pm; The Caboose, 1827 N. Orange Ave.; free; 407-898-7733. Southview, Old Again, the Year I Disappear, the Hoodrats, Griffin Sallmen 6 pm; The Space Station, 2539 Coolidge Ave.; $5.

CLUBS/LOUNGES Bearaoke 8 pm; Stonewall Bar Orlando, 741 W. Church St.; free; 407-373-0888.

Indecent Wednesday 10 pm; Parallel Nightclub, 369 N. Orange Ave.; free; 407-977-2997.

ORLANDO WEEKLY ● MARCH 30-APRIL 5, 2016

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Jazz Night 9 pm; Natura Coffee & Tea, 12078 Collegiate Way; free; 407-482-5000.

Trivia Night 7 pm; West End Trading Company, 202 S. Sanford Ave., Sanford; free; 407-322-7475.

Darko Gray, the Adolescent Theory, American Destitution 9 pm; Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave.; $5.

Kill the Keg Karaoke 8 pm; Copper Rocket Pub, 106 Lake Ave., Maitland; free; 407-636-3171.

Trivia with Doug Bowser 7:30 pm; Hamburger Mary’s, 110 W. Church St.; free; 321-319-0600.

Eugene Snowden & Friends 9 pm; Uncle Lou’s Entertainment Hall, 1016 N. Mills Ave.; free; 407-270-9104.

Mac and Cheese Wednesday 10 pm; Independent Bar, 70 N. Orange Ave.; free; 407-839-0457.

Untucked Bingo 5:30-9 pm; Parliament House, 410 N. Orange Blossom Trail; free; 407-425-7571.

One Hit Wonder Wednesdays 10 pm; The Patio, 14 W. Washington St.; free; 407-354-1577.

Wednesday Karaoke Nights 6-9 pm; Yellow Dog Eats, 1236 Hempel Ave., Windermere; free; 727-505-4566.

Red Carpet Karaoke 8 pm; Muldoon’s Saloon, 7439 Aloma Ave., Winter Park; free; 407-657-9980.

CONCERTS/EVENTS

Salsa vs Bachata Wednesdays 8 pm; Vinyl Arts Bar, 75 E. Colonial Drive; free.

88 Fingers Louie, Allout Helter, Flag on Fire, Moonmen From Mars, RushmoreFL 8 pm; Backbooth, 37 W. Pine St.; $13; 407-999-2570.

Themed Trivia Wednesdays 9:30 pm; The Falcon, 819 E. Washington St.; free; 407-423-3060.

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THURSDAY, MARCH 31

The Chainsmokers 8 pm; CFE Arena, 12777 N. Gemini Blvd.; $25; 407-823-6006.

Leisure Chief 10 pm; Tanqueray’s, 100 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-649-8540. Lounge Diggaz 9 pm; Lil Indies, 1036 N. Mills Ave.; free. Poster, Boxing at the Zoo, Sherlok 9 pm; Spacebar, 2428 E. Robinson St.; $5; 407-228-0804. San Holo 10 pm; The Social, 54 N. Orange Ave.; $10-$20; 407-246-1419. Timbo & Friends 9 pm; The Haven, 6700 Aloma Ave., Winter Park; free; 407-673-2712. The Velvet Sessions: Morris Day and the Time 6:30 pm;

Velvet Bar, Hard Rock Hotel at Universal Orlando; $29$50; 407-351-7625.

CLUBS/LOUNGES Bears In The City Presents: Thirsty Thursday Bearaoke 9 pm-1 am; Parliament House, 410 N. Orange Blossom Trail; free; 407-425-7571. Crosstown Sounds 10 pm-2 am; Sandwich Bar, 2432 E. Robinson St.; free; 954-651-3648. Geek Trivia 9 pm; Cloak and Blaster, 875 Woodbury Road; free. Locker Room Thursdays 5 pm; Stonewall Bar Orlando, 741 W. Church St.; free; 407-373-0888. MarsRadio’s Kick Machine: Indie Rock Smokeout 10 pm-2 am; Kush Ultra Lounge and Hookah Bar, 23 S. Court Ave.; $10; 407-843-5874.

CONTINUED ON PAGE 41

PHOTO BY DIRECTEDBYBANK

Dorm Wednesday 9 pm; Pulse, 1912 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-649-3888.

[MUSIC] T-Pain see page 44

THE WEEK

ORLANDO

APR THE MOLLY RINGWALDS “80’S COVER BAND” 9

Birds and Beer

Birds and Beer, Prey and Pints This fund-

Animal Collective

raiser for the Audubon Center for Birds of Prey lets you enjoy signature cocktails while getting

Nov. 11 at the Beacham

an up-close look at owls, bald eagles and more. 7 p.m. Wednesday; The Copper Rocket, 106 Lake Ave.; free; letsmakeitathing.com

Drunken Problem Solving The last Wednesday of the month, Lil Indies hosts this social game in which you and your team respond to prompts about hypothetical situations to identify problems – and solutions – that may arise. 8 p.m. Wednesday; Lil Indies, 1036 N. Mills Ave.; free; willspub.org

Concrete Beach Brewery Passion Fruit Wheat Ale Launch Concrete Beach, from the Wynwood district of Miami, launches its new summery wheat ale with a tasting party at Will’s Pub. 5 p.m. Thursday; Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave.; free; willspub.org

DRINK PHOTO BY JIM BAUER

The Road to Wrestlemania Runs Through the Patio If you don’t want to spring for cable just to watch Wrestlemania, watch Triple H and Roman Reigns duke it out at the Patio. Enjoy drink specials determined by who wins the match-ups of the night. 4:30 p.m. Sunday; The Patio, 14 W. Washington St.; free; thepatioorlando.com

They Might Be Giants, April 6 at the Beacham Miss Tess & the Talkbacks, April 6 at Will’s Pub G. Love & Special Sauce, April 7 at the Social Stick Figure, April 7 at the Beacham Napalm Death, the Melvins, April 8 at the Plaza Live Peanut Butter Wolf, J Rocc, April 8 at the Social Into It. Over It., The World Is a Beautiful Place ..., April 10 at the Social David Cross, April 14 at Hard Rock Live The Cult, April 14 at House of Blues Pentatonix, April 14 at CFE Arena KRS-ONE, April 16 at Backbooth The Used, April 19-20 at House of Blues

Herbie Hancock & Wayne Shorter, April 20 at the Dr. Phillips Center Steve Martin & Martin Short, April 23 at the Dr. Phillips Center The Joy Formidable, April 22 at the Social The Black Dahlia Murder, April 23 at the Social Underoath, April 24 at Hard Rock Live 36 Crazyfists, April 25 at Backbooth Death Cab for Cutie, April 28 at Hard Rock Live Flogging Molly, April 29 at House of Blues Father John Misty, April 30 at the Beacham Smashington 2016, May 7 at Will’s Pub Red Elvises, May 10 at Will’s Pub

The Sword, May 11 at the Social

Refused, June 9 at the Beacham

Murder by Death, May 13 at the Social

Selena Gomez, June 10 at Amway Center

Deftones, May 14 at House of Blues Florence & the Machine, May 14 at Amway Center The Summer Set, May 21 at the Social Screaming Females, May 21 at Will’s Pub Say Anything, May 24 at the Beacham !!!, May 26 at the Social Drag the River, June 1 at Will’s Pub Alejandro Escovedo, June 2 at the Social Total Punk’s Total Fuck Off Weekend III, June 3-4 at Will’s Pub Ellie Goulding, June 4 at CFE Arena Jason Bonham’s Led Zeppelin Experience, June 6 at Hard Rock Live

Thrice, June 11 at House of Blues St. Lucia, June 15 at the Social Demi Lovato & Nick Jonas, June 25 at Amway Center Justin Bieber, June 30 at Amway Center Twenty One Pilots, July 1 at Amway Center

APR 10

THE DIVAS OF DRAG

APR 14

THE CULT

APR 19

THE USED

APR 20

THE USED

APR 22

IRATION

APR 23

SISTER HAZEL

APR 24

GRACE POTTER

APR 29

FLOGGING MOLLY

APR 30

EVANESCENCE

MAY 5

BOYCE AVENUE

Halsey, July 6 at CFE Arena Goo Goo Dolls, Aug. 30 at Hard Rock Live Maroon 5, Sept. 9 at Amway Center Animal Collective, Nov. 11 at the Beacham Peter Hook & the Light, Nov. 17 at the Plaza Live

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THE WEEK

SATURDAY, APRIL 2

Of Montreal MUSIC

For nearly a quarter-century, defying expectations has been Of Montreal’s guiding principle. Kevin Barnes and his ragtag crew have dabbled in dusty alt-country, funky dance jams, twee indie pop, glammed-up garage rock and everything in between. Shoot, on the band’s last three albums alone, the focus has veered from dissonant experimentation to paisley-hued psychedelia to heart-rending art-punk. Add in Barnes’ hyper-literate lyricism, fantastical artwork and flamboyant stage production, and you’ve got a singular modern group with no real antecedent and very few contemporaries. But Of Montreal no longer hides behind the mask of outlandish freakiness they once did; 2015’s Aureate Gloom might be the band’s most honest and relatable record. As Barnes said in press for the album, “I might be guilty of sharing or exposing too much of my private life, but to me the best albums are those that help people connect with an artist on a deep, human level and that do so without too much artifice or evasiveness.” – Nick McGregor with Tomboi | 8 p.m. | The Social, 54 N. Orange Ave. | 407-246-1419 | thesocial.org | $20

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 38

Mixx Thursdays with Rob Lo 10 pm; ONO Nightclub, 1 S. Orange Ave.; contact for price; 407-701-9875.

PHOTO BY CHAD KAMENSHINE

Retuned 10 pm; The Monkey Bar, 26 Wall Street Plaza; free; 407-481-1199. Simon Time Trivia 7-9:30 pm; Copper Rocket Pub, 106 Lake Ave., Maitland; free; 407-636-3171. Think Tank Trivia 8 pm; Lil Indies, 1036 N. Mills Ave.; free. You Can’t Sit With Us Ladies Night 11:45 pm-2 am;

Backbooth, 37 W. Pine St.; free-$3; 407-999-2570. FRIDAY, APRIL 1

CONCERTS/EVENTS Annual Block Party: The Buddy Blues Band, Alex Cole Band, Ryan McKenzie, Sean Holcomb, Eugene Snowden and Co. 5 pm; The Outpost Neighborhood Kitchen, 2603 Edgewater Drive; free; 407-930-6282. April Fools Day Deep Tech 10 pm; Sandwich Bar, 2432 E. Robinson St.; contact for price; 407-421-1670.

Bonerama 7 pm; Backbooth, 37 W. Pine St.; $15; 407-999-2570. Classic Albums Live: The Eagles’ Hotel California 8 pm; Hard Rock Live, 6050 Universal Blvd.; $14-$24; 407-351-5483. Def Leggend 7:30 pm; House of Blues, Disney Springs, Lake Buena Vista; $8.75; 407-934-2583. Dr. K & Friends Blue Jazz 8 pm; Chef Eddie’s, 595 W. Church St.; free; 407-595-8494. Hazardous Folk, Petey & the Ravens, Tears of a Tyrant CONTINUED ON PAGE 42

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THE WEEK

[MUSIC] Blackbird Blackbird see page 47

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 41

9 pm; Red Lion Pub, 3784 Howell Branch Road, Winter Park; $5; 407-677-9669. Litlando: Mr. Bongos, Darkfiasco, DJ McChicken, Low x Poly, Midnight Inspector, Safeko, Random Panda, Wavyboys 7 pm; Uncle Lou’s Entertainment Hall, 1016 N. Mills Ave.; $3; 407-270-9104. Mango Beats 10 pm; Debbie’s Bar, 1422 State Road 436, Casselberry; free; 407-677-5963. MultipleTap Tour: Hijokaiden, Hatis Noit, Jeff Carey, ucnv, Atsuhiro Ito, Kou Katsuyoshi, Yosuke Fuyama, Makoto Oshiro, Sofheso, the Caution Children, Ad Nauseum, Hell Garbage 8 pm; Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave.; $15. Renderglow 7 pm; Todd English’s Bluezoo, Disney’s Dolphin Resort, Lake Buena Vista; free; 407-934-1111. Run Raquel 11:55 pm; Copper Rocket Pub, 106 Lake Ave., Maitland; $5; 407-636-3171.

The Welzeins,Twigs, Slumberjack 9 pm; The Hourglass Brewery, 255 S. Ronald Reagan Blvd., Longwood; free; 407-262-0056. 42

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106 Lake Ave., Maitland; free; 407-636-3171.

CLUBS/LOUNGES

Wall Street Plaza Block Party 11 pm; Wall Street Plaza, Wall and Court streets; free; 407-849-0471.

DJ BMF 10 pm; Lil Indies, 1036 N. Mills Ave.; free.

OPERA/CLASSICAL

DJ Cliff T 10 pm; Aero, 60 N. Orange Ave.; free; 321-245-7730. Footloose 80s Night Midnight; Backbooth, 37 W. Pine St.; free; 407-999-2570. House of Eve Fridays 10 pm; Eve, 110 S. Orange Ave.; contact for price; 407-602-7462. Laced After Hours BYOB 10 pm; Nokturnal, 47 W. Amelia St.; $10-$30; 424-242-6798. MarsRadio’s Upstairs Suite: Deep & Chilled Out Sessions 10 pm-2 am; Kush Ultra Lounge and Hookah Bar, 23 S. Court Ave.; $10; 407-834-5874. Nerdy Karaoke 8 pm; The Geek Easy, 114 S. Semoran Blvd., Winter Park; free; 407-332-9636. The Patio Friday Night 9 pm; The Patio, 14 W. Washington St.; free; 407-354-1577.

DIY Messiah 7:30 pm; A sing-along of selections from Handel’s Messiah. First Congregational Church, East New England and South Interlachen avenues, Winter Park; free; messiahchoralsociety.org. The Magic Flute 8 pm; With a host of memorable human, animal and magical characters, Mozart’s opera blends myth, magic and Mozart’s extraordinary music to deliver a life-affirming message. The Plaza Live, 425 N. Bumby Ave.; $22-$64; 407-2281220; orlandophil.org. SATURDAY, APRIL 2

CONCERTS/EVENTS The Actomatics, Multiple Me 9 pm; The Hourglass Brewery, 255 S. Ronald Reagan Blvd., Longwood; free; 407-262-0056.

Platinum Friday 4 pm; Pulse, 1912 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-649-3888.

Black Light Cobras, Halo Violation, Rubble Road 9 pm; The Haven, 6700 Aloma Ave., Winter Park; $8; 407-673-2712.

Simon Time Trivia 7-9:30 pm; Copper Rocket Pub,

CONTINUED ON PAGE 44

PHOTO BY JACQUIE RAY

Seven Factor, Nero Bellum, Hell’s Fauna, Guverra 8 pm; The Haven, 6700 Aloma Ave., Winter Park; $5; 407-673-2712.

The Western Sons, Raising Cadence, Scholars and Scoundrels, Glass House Point 8 pm; The Social, 54 N. Orange Ave.; $10-$12; 407-246-1419.

THE WEEK CONTINUED FROM PAGE 42

Bloody Jug Band, Will Brack OMB 9 pm; St. Matthew’s Tavern, 1300 N. Mills Ave.; free. Ghastly 10 pm; Gilt Nightclub, 740 Bennett Road; $10-$30; 407-504-7699.

T-Pain 8:30 pm; Universal Studios, 6000 Universal Blvd.; price of admission; 407-363-8000.

Signature 10 pm; Fusion 360, 7559 W. Sand Lake Road; $10-$75; 407-985-2900.

TWLOHA Turns 10: Jon Foreman, Matt Wertz, Renee Yohe, Sierra Demulder 6 pm; House of Blues, Disney Springs, Lake Buena Vista; $22; 407-934-2583.

OPERA/CLASSICAL

Waitress 9 pm; The Falcon, 819 E. Washington St.; free; 407-423-3060.

Hoyle, Volunteer, Henrietta 9 pm; Backbooth, 37 W. Pine St.; $8; 407-999-2570. Liotta, Natalie Claro, Up From Here, Succulent Thing, Sleeping Sons 8 pm; Bombshell’s Tavern, 5405 Edgewater Drive; $7; 407-730-3999.

CLUBS/LOUNGES

Moonfest Meltdown: Massive Head Wound, Mikey Cunningham & the Aftermath, Arakara, Medal Militia, Giraffe Fight, Kirov, Rijua, Vapid, Jo-Solo 5 pm; West End Trading Company, 202 S. Sanford Ave., Sanford; $10-$12; 407-322-7475.

DJ M-Squared 9 pm-2 am; The Groove, CityWalk at Universal Orlando; $7; 407-224-2166.

DJ Cliff T 10 pm; Aero, 60 N. Orange Ave.; free; 321-245-7730.

Girl the Party 9 pm; Southern Nights, 375 S. Bumby Ave.; $5-$10; 407-412-5039.

Natural Child, Thee Wilt Chamberlain 8 pm; Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave.; free.

Greetings From Orlando: Spreadsheets, Bleek ‘n Coy 2-9 pm; Barley and Vine Biergarten, 2406 E. Washington St.; free.

Of Montreal, Tomboi 8 pm; The Social, 54 N. Orange Ave.; $20; 407-246-1419.

Laced After Hours BYOB 10 pm; Nokturnal, 47 W. Amelia St.; $10-$30; 424-242-6798.

The Rogue Ovals 11:55 pm; Copper Rocket Pub, 106 Lake Ave., Maitland; $5; 407-636-3171.

MarsRadio’s Upstairs Suite: Deep & Chilled Out Sessions 10 pm-2 am; Kush Ultra Lounge and Hookah Bar, 23 S. Court Ave.; $10; 407-834-5874.

Seth Vogt, Redcoat, Geebo, J-Dub 10 pm; Spacebar, 2428 E. Robinson St.; $5; 407-228-0804.

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SUNDAY, APRIL 3

CONCERTS/EVENTS Ancient Sun 10:30 pm; Tanqueray’s, 100 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-649-8540. Bellavotti 5:30 pm; Copper Rocket Pub, 106 Lake Ave., Maitland; free; 407-636-3171. Gláss, the Francis Vertigo, Transcendental Telecom 9 pm; Spacebar, 2428 E. Robinson St.; $5; 407-228-0804. Music in the Library: Aleksandra Vargas and Marisa Dawson 3-4 pm; Orlando Public Library, 101 E. Central Blvd.; free; 407-835-7323. Robin Trower 8 pm; Hard Rock Live, 6050 Universal Blvd.; $37.50-$57.50; 407-351-5483.

Midnight Mass Dance Party Midnight; Backbooth, 37 W. Pine St.; free; 407-999-2570.

Show Choir America 11 am; Hard Rock Live, 6050 Universal Blvd.; $40; 407-351-5483.

The Met Live in HD: Madama Butterfly 12:55 pm; Anthony Minghella’s breathtaking production has thrilled audiences ever since its premiere in 2006. One of the world’s foremost Butterflys, soprano Kristine Opolais, takes on the title role, and Roberto Alagna sings Pinkerton, the naval officer who breaks Butterfly’s heart. Multiple locations; $25.56; 855-473-4612; fathomevents.com.

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CLUBS/LOUNGES An Tobar Trivia 6 pm; An Tobar, 600 N. Lake Destiny Drive, Maitland; $5; 407-267-4044. Back to the Eighties 3-7 pm; Stardust Lounge, 431 E. Central Blvd.; free; 407-839-0080. Tropical Sundays with DJ Frankie G 10 pm; The Social, 54 N. Orange Ave.; $5-$15; 407-246-1419. What Da Funk Sundays 9 pm; Saigon Harbor, 219 Broadway Ave., Kissimmee; free-$5; 407-530-5944.

OPERA/CLASSICAL

PHOTO BY JAMES WESLEY NICHOLS

The Magic Flute 2 pm; With a host of memorable human, animal and magical characters, Mozart’s opera blends myth, magic and Mozart’s extraordinary music to deliver a life-affirming message. The Plaza Live, 425 N. Bumby Ave.; $22-$64; 407-2281220; orlandophil.org. MONDAY, APRIL 4

CONCERTS/EVENTS Jacuzzi Boys, the Woolly Bushmen, Tight Genes 8 pm; The Social, 54 N. Orange Ave.; $10; 407-246-1419. Jazz Meets Motown 7 pm; Bohemian Hotel

Celebration, 700 Bloom St., Celebration; $20. Letters to Part, Sea of Surrender, Coma Etiquette, Isles Apart 8 pm; Olde 64, 64 N. Orange Ave.; free; 321-245-7730. Mainland 2 pm; Park Ave CDs, 2916 Corrine Drive; free; 407-447-7275. Melanie Martinez, Mainland 6:30 pm; House of Blues, Disney Springs, Lake Buena Vista; $20; 407-934-2583. Morning Fatty, the O Music 9 pm; Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave.; $7-$10.

Curtis Earth Trivia 6:30 pm; Bikes Beans & Bordeaux, 3022 Corrine Drive; free; 407-427-1440. Curtis Earth Trivia 7 pm; Graffiti Junktion - Thornton Park, 900 E. Washington St.; free; 407-426-9503. Game Night 9 pm; Parliament House, 410 N. Orange Blossom Trail; free; 407-425-7571. Man Mondays 5:30 pm; The Falcon, 819 E. Washington St.; free; 407-423-3060. Noche Latina 9 pm; Pulse, 1912 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-649-3888.

My Digital Escape Tour: Bryan Stars, Johnnie Gilbert, Jordan Sweeto, Sounds Like Harmony 6 pm; Backbooth, 37 W. Pine St.; $15; 407-999-2570.

Rock Band Jam Night 8:30 pm; The Haven, 6700 Aloma Ave., Winter Park; free; 407-673-2712.

Reggae Dance Party With Dubmasters 9 pm; Fish on Fire, 7937 Daetwyler Drive; free; 407-670-8824.

White Trash Bingo with Doug Ba’aser 10 pm; Stonewall Bar Orlando, 741 W. Church St.; free; 407-373-0888.

Reggae Mondae 10 pm; Tanqueray’s, 100 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-649-8540.

TUESDAY, APRIL 5

Valleys, Of Tyrants, Rumours, No Komply, Fear the Concept 7 pm; Bombshell’s Tavern, 5405 Edgewater Drive; $10; 407-7303999.

CLUBS/LOUNGES Bears in the City Bearaoke 9 pm-1 am; Bar Codes, 4453 Edgewater Drive; free; 407-412-6917.

CONCERTS/EVENTS Blackbird Blackbird, Chad Valley, Tideup 7:30 pm; Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave.; $10-$12. Con Leche 10 pm; St. Matthew’s Tavern, 1300 N. Mills Ave.; free. The Groove Orient 10:30 pm; Tanqueray’s, 100 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-649-8540. CONTINUED ON PAGE 48

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Jazz in the Courtyard with the DaVinci Jazz Experiment 7-9 pm; Cafe DaVinci, 112 W. Georgia Ave., DeLand; free; 386-873-2943. Jazz Tuesdays 7:30 pm; The Smiling Bison, 745 Bennett Road; free; 407-898-8580. Music Remembrance Jazz Trio 8 pm; Paradise Cove Restaurant and Bar, 4380 Carraway Place, Sanford; free.

Howell Branch Road, Winter Park; $3 suggested donation; 407-677-9669. Whiskey Dick 10 pm; Lil Indies, 1036 N. Mills Ave.; free.

CLUBS/LOUNGES Bears in the City Bear Beats Bearaoke 9 pm-1 am; Parliament House, 410 N. Orange Blossom Trail; free; 407-425-7571. DJ Smilin’ Dan 10 pm; Independent Bar, 70 N. Orange Ave.; free; 407-839-04357.

Twisted Tuesday With the Bath Salt Zombies 9 pm; Red Lion Pub, 3784

Geek Trivia Tuesdays 7 pm; The Geek Easy, 114 S. Semoran Blvd., Winter Park; free; 407-332-9636.

Total Request Tuesdays with DJ Deron Martin 7 pm; Stonewall Bar Orlando, 741 W. Church St.; free; 407-373-0888.

Grits ‘n’ Gravy 10 pm; Independent Bar, 70 N. Orange Ave.; free-$3; 407-839-0457.

Trivia Nation 7 pm; East Coast Wings & Grill SoDo, 3183 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-930-9464.

Hambingo with Miss Sammy and Carol Lee 6:30 pm; Hamburger Mary’s, 110 W. Church St.; free; 321-319-0600.

Trivia Tuesday with Doug Ba’aser 5-9 pm; Parliament House, 410 N. Orange Blossom Trail; free; 407-425-7571.

Ivanhoe Trivia Knight 6 pm; The Hammered Lamb, 1235 N. Orange Ave.; free; 407-704-3200.

Turnt Tuesdays With Dizzlephunk 9 pm; West End Trading Company, 202 S. Sanford Ave., Sanford; free; 937 307 6654.

Total Punk Turnbuckle Tuesdays 11 pm; Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave.; free.

OPERA/CLASSICAL The Magic Flute 7 pm; With a host of memorable human, animal and magical characters, Mozart’s opera blends myth, magic and Mozart’s extraordinary music to deliver a life-affirming message. The Plaza Live, 425 N. Bumby Ave.; $22-$64; 407-228-1220; orlandophil.org.

THEATER The Bourgeois Gentleman This madcap, fastpaced farce centers around Mr. Jourdain, who has only one goal: to rise above his middle-class background and be accepted as an aristocrat. To do this, he dresses in fancy clothes and attempts to learn the gentlemanly arts. Instead, he makes a fool of himself. Friday-Saturday, 7:30 pm, Sunday, 2 pm and Monday, 7:30 pm; Valencia College East Campus, 701 N. Econlockhatchee Trail; $12; 407-582-2900; valenciacollege.edu. Dirty Dancing Seen by millions across the globe, this worldwide smash hit tells the classic story of Baby and Johnny, two fiercely independent young spirits from different worlds who come together in what will be the most challenging and triumphant summer of their lives. Wednesday-Friday, 8 pm, Saturday, 2 & 8 pm and Sunday, 1 & 6:30 pm; Dr. Phillips Center for the Performing Arts, 445 S. Magnolia Ave.; $33.75$113.75; 844-513-2014; drphillipscenter.org. Inherit the Wind When a teacher is arrested for exposing his high school sophomore biology class to evolution, a famously spell-binding politician comes to prosecute the case and a well-known columnist arrives to defend him. Wednesday-Saturday, 7:30 pm and Sunday, 2:30 pm; Volusia County Courthouse, 120 W. Indiana Ave., Deland; $18; athensdeland.com. Long Day’s Journey Into Night Over the course of a single day, this epic drama by Eugene O’Neill explores the dangers of the pursuit of wealth while exposing our most basic human flaws. ThursdaySaturday, 7:30 pm, Sunday, 2:30 pm and Monday, 7:30 pm; Mad Cow Theatre, 54 W. Church St.; $25-$38; 407-297-8788; madcowtheatre.com.

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T H O R N TO N PA R K

LOVE IT. LIVE IT

ART AT THE CENTER OF IT ALL When you have the opportunity to live in Downtown Orlando, FL the epicenter of a thriving cultural arts scene, you don’t want it to end when you pull into your parking spot. At 420 East apartments in Downtown Orlando, your culture merges with your apartment home in a completely immersive artistic living experience—making both more exciting, more accessible, and more authentic.

4 2 0 E C h u r c h S t , O r l a n d o , F L 3 2 8 0 1 | ( 4 0 7 ) 4 2 0 -1 4 0 0 | 4 2 0 e a s t a p a r t m e n t s . c o m 50

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[ART] Art31: Hackenwerth’s Wearables’ Swan Song see page 52

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Showtune: Celebrating the Words & Music of Jerry Herman A musical revue of familiar tunes from Hello Dolly!, Mame and more. Thursday, 2 pm, Friday-Saturday, 2 & 7:30 pm, Sunday, 2 pm; Winter Park Playhouse, 711-C Orange Ave., Winter Park; $30-$40; 407-645-0145; winterparkplayhouse.org.

PHOTO COURTESY OF MAITLAND ART CENTER

The Sound of Music When a postulant proves too highspirited for the religious life, she is dispatched to serve as governess for the seven children of a widowed naval Captain. Friday-Saturday, 7:30 pm, Sunday, 3 pm; Central Christian Church, 250 W. Ivanhoe Blvd.; $15-$18; cfcarts.com. Spencers: Theatre of Illusion This show features Kevin Spencer, an extraordinary magician, and his wife Cindy, in a dazzling show that combines storytelling, grand illusion, stage magic and audience participation. Saturday, 7 pm; Alexis & Jim Pugh Theater, 445 S. Magnolia Ave.; $23.50; drphillipscenter.org. Vanya and Sonia and Masha and Spike Vanya and his adopted sister Sonia live a quiet life in a Pennsylvania farmhouse, while their movie star sister Masha travels the world. When Masha appears for an unannounced visit with her 20-something boy toy in tow, the weekend builds to a

fever pitch of rivalry, regret and racket. WednesdaySaturday, 7:30 pm and Sunday, 2 pm; Orlando Shakespeare Theatre, 812 E. Rollins St.; $21-$46; orlandoshakes.org.

musicals and more extended formats based on audience suggestions. Saturdays, 11:30 pm; SAK Comedy Lab, 29 S. Orange Ave.; $7-$10; 407-6480001; sakcomedylab.com.

The Whale A 600-pound recluse hides away in his apartment eating himself to death. Desperate to reconnect with his long-estranged daughter, he reaches out to her, only to find a viciously sharp-tongued and wildly unhappy teen. ThursdaysSaturdays, 8-10:30 pm and Sundays, 2-4 pm; Garden Theatre, 160 W. Plant St., Winter Garden; $21-$28; 407-8774736; gardentheatre.org.

Gorilla Theatre This show features four professional improvisers directing each other in improvised scenes, games and songs to fit their chosen theme for the evening. Fridays, 9:30 pm; SAK Comedy Lab, 29 S. Orange Ave.; $12-$15; 407648-0001; sakcomedylab.com.

COMEDY Best of the Jest Comedy Showcase Hosted by Devin Siebold. Tuesdays, 9 pm; Olde 64, 64 N. Orange Ave.; free; 321-245-7730. Copper Rocket Comedy Jam Comedy open mic and showcase hosted by Heather Shaw. Sundays, 8:30 pm; Copper Rocket Pub, 106 Lake Ave., Maitland; free; 407-6363171; copperrocketpub.com. Drunken Monkey Open Showcase Comedy open mic. Fridays, 8 pm; Drunken Monkey Coffee Bar, 444 N. Bumby Ave.; free; 407-893-4994; drunkenmonkeycoffee.com. Early Show SAK favorites perform a more experimental show featuring improvised

Jack’s Open Mic Comedy Night Open mic comedy night hosted by Myke Herlihy. Tuesdays, Thursdays, 9 pm; Jack’s Pub & Grub, 5494 Central Florida Parkway; free; 407-787-3886. King of the Hill In this knockdown, drag-out comedy battle, seven professional ensemble members compete in a series of improv scenes and games to win your laughter, your applause and the coveted spot atop the hill. Saturdays, 9:30 pm; SAK Comedy Lab, 29 S. Orange Ave.; $12-$15; 407-6480001; sakcomedylab.com. Leonard Ouzts Thursday, 7 pm, Friday, 6:30 & 9:45 pm, Saturday, 6 & 9:45 pm and Sunday, 6 pm; Orlando Improv, 9101 International Drive; $15; 407-480-5233; theimprovorlando.com. The New Faces of Comedy A showcase of new comCONTINUED ON PAGE 52

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SERVING THE AUTHENTIC

GYRO SANDWICH WE ALSO HAVE A WIDE VARIETY OF VEGETARIAN SELECTIONS AND AUTHENTIC MEDITERRANEAN BEER AND WINE

CATERING AVAILABLE // FOLLOW US ON FACEBOOK! 435 E. MICHIGAN STREET 407.422.BLUE (2583)

[THEATER] Long Day’s Journey Into Night see page 48

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edy talent, hosted by Adam Heath Avitable. Wednesday, 7 pm; Orlando Improv, 9101 International Drive; $5; 407-480-5233; theimprovorlando.com. Open Mic Comedy With Craig Norbert Comedy open mic for aspiring comedians. Sundays; Austin’s Coffee, 929 W. Fairbanks Ave., Winter Park; free; 407-9753364; austinscoffee.com. Pope in the Pool Standup showcase hosted by Matt Gersting. Friday, 9:30 pm; St. Matthew’s Tavern, 1300 N. Mills Ave.; free. The Roast of Sean Finnerty Wednesday, 8 pm; Spacebar, 2428 E. Robinson St.; $5 suggested donation; 407-228-0804.

DANCE Corsets and Cuties: A Burlesque Cabaret The Cuties are back for a heaping helping of musical naughtiness. A sexy romp through singing, dancing and silliness. Saturday, 9 pm; The Venue, 511 Virginia Drive; $18; 407-9200156; thevenueorlando.com. 52

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First Fridays Burlesque With the Black Garter Dolls Black Garter Dolls is a burlesque troupe specializing in variety acts, classic burlesque striptease, cabaret singing, comedy and more. Friday, 10 pm; The Caboose, 1827 N. Orange Ave.; free; 407-3752501; blackgarterdolls.com. Orlando Ballet: Uncorked at the Abbey Weeknight performance that allows for an intimate audience performance experience and a Q&A session. Tuesday, 7 pm; The Abbey, 100 S. Eola Drive; $30-$50; 407426-1739; orlandoballet.org.

ART OPENINGS/EVENTS Art & Architecture in Cinema: Leonardo Da Vinci: The Genius in Milan Get an exclusive look into the man behind the masterpieces. This exhibition event is the result of six years of work by leading Da Vinci experts Pietro Marani and M. Teresa Fiorio. Thursday, 7 pm; Multiple locations; $15; 855473-4612; fathomevents.com.

Art 31: Hackenwerth’s Wearables’ Swan Song The last chance to view Jason Hackenwerth’s wearable sculptures created from latex balloons. Saturday, 11 am-4 pm; Maitland Art Center, 231 W. Packwood Ave., Maitland; $3; 407-539-2181; art31.org. The Art of Dominic Dasylva Dominic DaSylva shows his fabulous collage work in Gallery 251 at FAVO. Friday, 5-9 pm; Faith Arts Village Orlando, 221 E. Colonial Drive; free; 407-925-9019. Art31: Dan L. Hess Installation Dan L. Hess unveils his installation made during his residency at Factur. Thursday, 6:30-8:30 pm; Canvs, 101 S. Garland Ave.; free; art31.org. Chris Robb: Continuum Robb’s work deals with a purposeful reduction of expressionist techniques. He attempts to distill the technique down to it’s very essence. Opens Saturday, through April 30; Arts on Douglas, 123 Douglas St., New Smyrna Beach; free; 386428-1133; artsondouglas.net. Creative Coloring for Adults A fun, relaxing time of creating and coloring. All supplies will be provided, but feel free to bring your favorite colored pencils or markers. Saturday, 3-4 pm; Orlando Public Library, 101 E. Central Blvd.; free; 407-835-7323; ocls.info.

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PHOTO BY TOM HURST VIA MAD COW THEATRE

Shit Sandwich Probably the best comedy showcase in town. Show up early to grab a good seat. Saturday, 9 pm; Bull and Bush, 2408 E. Robinson St.; free; 407-896-7546.

Esmeralda and the Hunchback This classic love story tells the tale of the free-spirited, warm hearted Esmeralda, who falls in love with a handsome captain. Throughout the course of the ballet, they overcome all the obstacles that come their way to stay together. Sunday, 1 & 6 pm; Alexis & Jim Pugh Theater, 445 S. Magnolia Ave.; $45-$65; 407896-0309; drphillipscenter.org.

THE WEEK

[MUSIC] Mainland see page 47

Grady Kimsey: Gallery Talk and Tour Curator Barbara Tiffany leads a guided walk through the exhibition of works by Grady Kimsey and answers questions. Friday, 11 am-1 pm; Crealdé School of Art, 600 St. Andrews Blvd., Winter Park; free; 407-671-1886; crealde.org. McRae Art Studios’ Spring Fine Art Sale Maybe your last chance to pick up art from McRae Art Studios before they close their doors for good. Saturday, 4-10 pm; McRae Art Studios, 904 Railroad Ave., Winter Park; free; 407-5999956; mcraeartstudios.com. Orlando Drink & Draw Meet up with Thomas Thorspecken and work on your sketching skills. Definitely sing some karaoke

Surfaces: Exhibition of Experimental Video Art A onenight pop-up exhibition featuring interactive, experimental and projection-based video art installations from some of the best video and projection artists in Orlando and beyond. Saturday, 7 pm; UCF Visual Arts Building, 4000 Central Florida Blvd.; free; (407) 823-2000; arts.cah.ucf.edu.

CONTINUING THIS WEEK Abstraction, Observation and Reflection Through April 16; The Gallery at Avalon Island, 39 S. Magnolia Ave.; free. Albert Paley: Forged Works Through April 10; Mennello Museum of American Art, 900 E. Princeton St.; $5; 407-2464278; mennellomuseum.com. All Small Gods ThursdaysSaturdays, 12-6 pm; A Place Gallery, 649 N. Mills Ave.; free; timewastemanagement.org. Art Legends of Orange County: Grady Kimsey – Progressions,

Art Legends of Orange County: Grady Kimsey – The Right of Passage Through April 2; Crealdé School of Art, 600 St. Andrews Blvd., Winter Park; free; 407-671-1886; crealde.org. Black Box Honey Through Thursday; UCF Art Gallery, 12400 Aquarius Agora Drive; free; 407-8233161; arts.cah.ucf.edu. The Bride Elect – Gifts From the 1905 Wedding of Elizabeth Owens Morse TuesdaysSaturdays, 9:30 am-4 pm and Sundays, 1-4 pm; Charles Hosmer Morse Museum of American Art, 445 N. Park Ave., Winter Park; $6; 407-6455311; morsemuseum.org.

— DON’T MISS —

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Emerging Waves A group exhibition of works by eight emerging Florida artists: Jacoub Reyes, Jonathan Yubi, NiceGuy Darrell, Osvaldo Yero Dominguez, Michael Covello, Jordan Senarens, Diego Inkusual and John Baker. Friday, 6-10 pm; Henao Contemporary Center, 5601 Edgewater Drive; free; 407272-0317; henaocenter.com.

Protobots Artist Doug Rhodehamel presents his latest and cutest series of robots made from repurposed and surplus materials. Opens Friday, 7 pm; Stardust Doubleleg Gallery, 1842 E. Winter Park Road; free.

Works by Former Students Through April 2; Hannibal Square Heritage Center, 642 W. New England Ave., Winter Park; free; 407539-2680; crealde.org.

Doggie Art Festival A dogthemed art show featuring pet-related artists, vendors and adoption organizations. Sunday, 10 am-4 pm; Park Avenue, Park Avenue at Morse Boulevard, Winter Park; free.

afterward. Monday, 7-9 pm; Big Daddy’s, 3001 Corrine Drive; free; 407-644-2844; bigdaddysorlando.com.

California Impressionism Through April 10; Museum of Art DeLand – Downtown, 100 N. Woodland Blvd., DeLand; $10; 386-7344371; moartdeland.org.

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Capturing Florida’s Beauty on Canvas Through April 30; Mount Dora Center for the Arts, 138 E. Fifth Ave., Mount Dora; free; 352-383-0880; mountdoracenterforthearts.org. Celebrating the Genius of Women Through April 24;

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[MUSIC] The Velvet Sessions: Morris Day and the Time see page 38

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Orlando Public Library, 101 E. Central Blvd.; free; 407-8357481; womeninthearts.org. Central Florida Watercolor Society Annual Juried Show Through April 1; Winter Garden Art Association, 127 S. Boyd St., Winter Garden; free; 407-347-7996; wgart.org. The Civil Rights Movement Revisited Through April 17; Southeast Museum of Photography, Daytona State College, Daytona Beach; free; 386-506-4475; smponline.org. Cymecha: Capturing the Beauty of Sound Through April 17; Lil Indies, 1036 N. Mills Ave.; free; 407-7488256; synthestruct.com. David Bowie Tribute Art Show Through April 24; The Falcon, 819 E. Washington St.; free; 407-423-3060. Doris Leeper: Hard Edges Through April 3; Cornell Fine Arts Museum, Rollins College, 1000 Holt Ave., Winter Park; free; 407-6462526; cfam.rollins.edu. Esherick to Nakashima Tuesdays-Sundays, 10 am-5 pm; Modernism Museum Mount Dora, 145 E. Fourth Ave., Mount Dora; $8; 352-385-0034; modernismmuseum.org. Eureka!: The Moment When Art and Science Collide Through 56

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April 17 and Thursday 6-9 pm; CityArts Factory, 29 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-648-7060.

Natura Through April 17; CityArts Factory, 29 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-648-7060.

FAVO Artists Open House Friday, 5-9 pm; Faith Arts Village Orlando, 221 E. Colonial Drive; free; 407-222-1231; faithartsvillage.com.

Quaking Aspen Through April 17; Southeast Museum of Photography, Daytona State College, Daytona Beach; free; 386-506-4475; smponline.org.

In Exile: Paris and New York Through May 15; Southeast Museum of Photography, Daytona State College, Daytona Beach; free; 386506-4475; smponline.org.

Sci-Fi Art Show Through April 2; Dandelion Communitea Cafe, 618 N. Thornton Ave.; free; 407-362-1864; dandelioncommunitea.com.

InFlux Exhibition Series: Will Cotton Through June 5; Orlando Museum of Art, 2416 N. Mills Ave.; $8; 407896-4231; omart.org. Jim Couper: There Are No Other Everglades in the World Through April 3; Museum of Art DeLand, 600 N. Woodland Blvd., DeLand; $10; 386-7344371; moartdeland.org. The Journey Projects: Eatonville Ongoing; Zora Neale Hurston National Museum of Fine Arts, 227 E. Kennedy Blvd., Eatonville; free; 407647-3307; zorafestival.org. Junkbots Through April 24; BART, 1205 N. Mills Ave.; free; 407-796-2522. Material World: Glass, Rubber and Paper Through May 1; Maitland Art Center, 231 W. Packwood Ave., Maitland; $3; 407-5392181; artandhistory.org.

Sculptures by David Hayes Through Oct. 30; Museum of Art DeLand, 600 N. Woodland Blvd., DeLand; $5; 386-7344371; moartdeland.org. Sight Unseen: Touchable Sculpture Through April 17; Albin Polasek Museum and Sculpture Gardens, 633 Osceola Ave., Winter Park; $5; 407-647-6294; polasek.org. The Sources: Paintings and Drawings by Steve Lotz Through June 5; Orlando Museum of Art, 2416 N. Mills Ave.; $8; 407896-4231; omart.org. Terra Incognita: Photographs of America’s Third Coast Through April 17; Southeast Museum of Photography, Daytona State College, Daytona Beach; free; 386506-4475; smponline.org. Transcommunality: Laura Anderson Barbata, CONTINUED ON PAGE 59

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Collaboration Beyond Borders Through Sunday; Cornell Fine Arts Museum, Rollins College, 1000 Holt Ave., Winter Park; free; 407646-2526; cfam.rollins.edu. Transference Through Thursday; Winter Park Welcome Center and Chamber of Commerce, 151 W. Lyman Ave., Winter Park; free; 407-644-8281; cityofwinterpark.org. Untouchable Through April 16; Redefine Gallery, 29 S. Orange Ave.; free; 407-648-7060. A Walk in the Woods: New Work by BJ Lantz Through April 16; Arts on Douglas, 123 Douglas St., New Smyrna Beach; free; 386-428-1133; artsondouglas.net.

paired with eight different Girl Scout cookies. Saturday, 2 pm; World of Beer - Altamonte, 155 Cranes Roost Blvd., Altamonte Springs; $25; 407834-2337; worldofbeer.com.

EVENTS

Birds & Beer, Prey & Pints A fundraiser for the Audubon Center for Birds of Prey featuring special drinks, an art auction and music, along with special appearances by owls, bald eagles and more. Wednesday, 7 pm; Copper Rocket Pub, 106 Lake Ave., Maitland; free; 407-6363171; letsmakeitathing.com.

Ask Me Another NPR’s “Ask Me Another,” the rambunctious live show from NPR and WNYC that blends brainteasers, pub trivia, comedy and music into an evening of hilarity, makes a stop in Orlando. Wednesday, 7:30 pm; Bob Carr Theater, 401 W. Livingston St.; $45-$60; 800-785-2020; wmfe.org/ama. Back-to-School Blast Enjoy delectable food, a fabulous auction, our signature wine and martini bar, live music, plenty of entertainment and celebrity host Chris Kirkpatrick from ‘N Sync. Saturday, 6:30-10:30 pm; Rosen Shingle Creek Resort, 9939 Universal Blvd.; $125; 407-318-3123; back2schoolblast.com.

Brewmaster’s Invitational Beer Festival A beer festival with more than 50 breweries, 200 beers, artists, food and entertainment. Saturday, noon5:30 pm; Exploration Tower at Port Canaveral, 670 Dave Nisbet Drive, Cape Canaveral; $30-$60; 321-613-4805; brewmastersinvitational.com. Central Florida Native Plant Sale Pick up some native Florida plants for your

Beer and Cookies Enjoy eight different beers from Terrapin

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“EARRINGS” BY WILL COTTON

[ART] Influx Exhibition Series: Will Cotton see page 56

Will Barnet: Graphic Retrospective Through April 3; Museum of Art DeLand, 600 N. Woodland Blvd., DeLand; $10; 386-7344371; moartdeland.org.

Women of Vision: National Geographic Photographers on Assignment Through April 24; Orlando Museum of Art, 2416 N. Mills Ave.; $8; 407-896-4231; omart.org.

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landscaping or gardening needs. Thursday-Friday, 2-7 pm and Saturday, 8 am-noon; Osceola Heritage Park, 1875 Silver Spur Lane, Kissimmee; free; 321-729-6857; centralfloridanativeplantsale. com. Cheers to Change Victims Service Center of Central Florida’s third annual gala to raise funds to provide counseling services to the victims of sexual assault. Friday, 6-10 pm; Orlando Museum of Art, 2416 N. Mills Ave.; $50; 407-2549415; victimservicecenter.org. Claim Your Space A meetup for girls who are interested in punk, featuring basic guitar and bass lessons. Saturday, 7 pm; The Space Station, 2539 Coolidge Ave.; $2 donation.

Crooked Can Beer Pairing Dinner The chefs at Wreckers Sports Bar team up with the brew masters at Crooked Can Brewery to craft a five-course seasonal dining experience. Friday, 6-9 pm; Gaylord Palms Resort, 6000 W. Osceola Parkway, Kissimmee; $55; 407-586-1114; gaylordpalmstickets.com. Drink Around the World Imbibe different beers, wines and spirits from around the world in themed areas representing each location’s culture. Saturday, 6-9 pm; Wall Street Plaza, Wall and Court streets; $20-$25; 407-849-0471. Drunken Problem Solving Bring a team to compete in a game of coming up with possible

problems that the future may hold and then making creative solutions for them. Wednesday, 8 pm; Lil Indies, 1036 N. Mills Ave.; free; willspub.org. For the Love of Swine The Ravenous Pig holds a prix fixe pig roast with braised black-eyed peas, bacon collard greens, cornbread and maple bacon cupcakes. Reservations required. First Saturday of every month, 11:30 am-2 pm; The Ravenous Pig, 1234 N. Orange Ave., Winter Park; $17; 407-6282333; theravenouspig.com. The Geek Easy’s Wrestlemania Party Watch Wrestlemania and enjoy a costume contest and wrestling video game tournament. Sunday, 5-11 pm; The Geek Easy, 114 S. Semoran Blvd., Winter Park; free; 407-332-9636. Indiafest Indian food, entertainment and craft vendors. Saturday, 11 am-6 pm; Hindu Society of Central Florida, 1994 Lake Drive, Casselberry; free. CONTINUED ON PAGE 62

PHOTO BY FRANK APOLLONIO

[MUSIC] The Chainsmokers see page 38

Cocktails for a Cause A fundraiser for City Year Orlando featuring cocktails and hors d’oeuvres. Tuesday, 5:30-7:15 pm; Citrus Club, 255 S. Orange Ave.; $10; 407-581-7572.

Concrete Beach Brewery Passion Fruit Wheat Ale Launch Concrete Beach, from the Wynwood district of Miami, throws a celebration for the release of their new, summery beer. Thursday, 5 pm; Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave.; free; willspub.org.

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[ART] Protobots see page 55

CONTINUED FROM PAGE 61

The Mercury Collective Premier Launch Party An artistic development and networking event, with some of Orlando’s best emerging music artists and media creatives. Friday, 8 pm; Gods & Monsters, 5250 International Drive; free; godmonsters.com. Poca’s Hottest Sauce Cook-Off Local cooks compete to see who can make the best dish using Poca’s Hottest sauces while musical acts like Thomas & Olivia Wynn, Kaleigh Baker, Terri Binion and more provide entertainment. Sunday, 1 pm; Will’s Pub, 1042 N. Mills Ave.; $12-$25; willspub.org. Portuguese Wine Tasting Taste seven wines from Portugal and learn about the region in depth. Thursday, 6:30 pm; The Swirlery, 1508 E. Michigan St.; $15; 407270-6300; swirlery.com.

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ness event featuring live music, art, food trucks, a silent disco and more. Saturdays, 7 pm; Woodstock Orlando, 500 N. Orange Blossom Trail; $7; woodstockorlando.com.

SAL-ALR-ific Classic Car & Bike Show Show off your car or bike, or just look at others. Sunday, 11 am-5 pm; American Legion Memorial Post 19, 5320 Alloway St.; free; 407-6221807; salmemorialpost19.org.

LEARNING

Spooky Empire Retro Con Horror and film convention featuring media guests like Alice Cooper and the casts of Weird Science and A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors. Friday, 6 pm, Saturday-Sunday, noon; Wyndham Orlando Resort, 8001 International Drive; $30-$60; 954-2587852; spookyempire.com. Spring Fiesta in the Park Spring festival featuring more than 300 artists, vendors and food trucks. Saturday, 10 am-5 pm and Sunday, 12-5 pm; Lake Eola Park, East Central Boulevard and North Eola Drive; free; cityoforlando.net. Tasty Tuesdays Food trucks take over the parking lot behind the Milk District every Tuesday evening. Tuesdays, 6:30-10 pm; The Milk District, East Robinson Street and North Bumby Avenue; various menu prices; facebook.com/ tastytuesdaysorlando. Woodstock 2016 A weekly community arts and aware-

Adam Braun Braun shares the story leading to his creation of Pencils of Promise, whose mission is educating underprivileged children throughout the world. Tuesday, 7 pm; Bush Auditorium, Rollins College, 1000 Holt Ave., Winter Park; free; 407646-2000; rollins.edu. Cuisine Corner: Comfort Food Lasagna Chef Kevin Marshall shows you how to create a twist on lasagna using zucchini instead of pasta to cut the carbs and your waist line. Monday, 6:15-7:15 pm; Orlando Public Library, 101 E. Central Blvd.; free; 407-835-7323; ocls.info. How Do We Know? This ground-breaking presentation gives audiences the chance to create their own unique planetarium show, selecting the astronomical facts and theories they would most like to explore. Saturday, 8:30-9:30 pm; Seminole State College Planetarium, 100 Weldon Blvd., Sanford; $6; 407-7082360; seminolestate.edu. Native Americans and Their Ties to Eagles Join Senior Educator Robert Veal from CONTINUED ON PAGE 64

ART BY DOUG RHODEHAMEL

Provisions & Buzz Co. and Quantum Leap Winery Wine Pairing Dinner Featuring a six-course dinner of fresh dishes paired with wines from Quantum Leap Winery. Learn about wines made in Orlando, and taste how they pair with masterful dishes. Wednesday, 6-9 pm; Provisions & Buzz Co., 4848 New Broad St.; $75; 407-896-2688; provisionsandbuzzco.com.

Wrestlemania viewing party with drink specials determined by who wins matches. Sunday, 4:30 pm; The Patio, 14 W. Washington St.; free; 407-3541577; thepatioorlando.com.

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the Audubon Center for Birds of Prey as he presents an interpretive program on Native Americans and their traditions surrounding Bald Eagles. Thursday, 6:30 pm; Maitland Public Library, 501 S. Maitland Ave., Maitland; free; 407-647-7700; maitlandpubliclibrary.org. Spring Salads Cooking Class Learn how to prepare a cauliflower and orange salad, Greek tomato cucumber salad, shaved zucchini salad, pickled shrimp salad and a fruit salad. Thursday, 6:30-9 pm; The Ancient Olive, 324 N. Park Ave., Winter Park; $50; 321-9721899; theancientolive.com.

CIVICS State of the Cities Luncheon Join your elected officials for lunch and dialogue presented by the Greater Sanford Regional Chamber of Commerce. Sanford Mayor Jeff Triplett is joined by DeBary Mayor Clint Johnson, Deltona Mayor John Masiarczyk Sr., and Lake Mary Mayor David Mealor to discuss economic development successes and opportunities within each community. Thursday, 11 am; Heathrow Country Club, 1200 Bridgewater Drive, Heathrow; $35; 407-3222212; sanfordchamber.com.

LITERARY The Bohemian Woods Orlando writers read prose and poetry inspired by current events. Hosted by Tod Caviness. Tuesday, 8-10 pm; The Imperial at Washburn Imports, 1800 N. Orange Ave.; free; 407-228-4992. Books & Brews: Short Stories Month Meet up to discuss your favorite short stories with fellow readers. Tuesday, 7:30 pm; Redlight Redlight, 2810 Corrine Drive; free; 407-893-9832; wppl.org. Diverse Word Spoken word open mic. Tuesdays, 8 pm; Dandelion Communitea Cafe, 618 N. Thornton 64

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Ave.; free; 407-362-1864; dandelioncommunitea.com. The Hollywood Effect: A Celebration of Cinema A night of spoken word, songs, poems and short stories inspired by a love of Hollywood, television, celebrities and film. Monday, 6:30 pm; Maitland Public Library, 501 S. Maitland Ave., Maitland; free; 407-647-7700. Nerd’s the Word Slam Competitive poetry slam with two featured readers. Thursday, 8 pm; The Milk Bar, 2424 E. Robinson St.; free; 407-896-4954. Open Mic Poetry and Spoken Word Poetry and spoken word open mic. Wednesdays, 9 pm; Austin’s Coffee, 929 W. Fairbanks Ave., Winter Park; free; 407-975-3364; austinscoffee.com. Reflecting Florida: Storytelling Through Image and Word A double book launch event featuring new books on Florida history by Gary Monroe and Jeff Kunerth. Sunday, 1-3 pm; Bookmark It, 3201 Corrine Drive; free.

FAMILY Big Bugs An outdoor exhibit of gargantuan insect sculptures made from natural materials displayed throughout the gardens. Through April 15, 9 am-5 pm; Harry P. Leu Gardens, 1920 N. Forest Ave.; $10; 407246-2620; leugardens.org. Story Time at Leu Gardens Stories and songs for children ages 0-5. Monday, 10-11 am; Harry P. Leu Gardens, 1920 N. Forest Ave.; free; 407246-2620; leugardens.org.

SPORTS 4.01k Race for Financial Fitness An exciting event that promotes both physical health and financial wellness. Friday, 4-8 pm; Lake Baldwin Park, 2380 Lake Baldwin Lane; $35; 407-270-4974; 401krace.com. Glow With the Flow Yoga Glow in the dark yoga with

optional face and body paint. Thursdays, 7 pm; Aero, 60 N. Orange Ave.; $15. A Night of Destruction Racing event with school bus figure 8 racing, a demolition derby, a reverse race and more. Saturday, 7:30 pm; Auburndale Speedway, 5640 E. County Road 542, Winter Haven; $20; 863-280-6913; tourofdestruction.com. Orlando City vs. Portland Timbers Soccer. Sunday, 8 pm; Orlando Citrus Bowl, 1 Citrus Bowl Place; $19.17$161.88; 407-423-2476; orlandocitysc.com. Orlando Ingress Event Niantic comes to town to turn Venue 578 and the surrounding area into a gigantic gameboard, where the Resistance and Enlightened will battle it out for territory. Saturday, 9 am; Venue 578, 578 N. Orange Ave.; free; 407-872-0066; ingress.com. Orlando Magic vs. Memphis Grizzlies Basketball. Sunday, 6 pm; Amway Center, 400 W. Church St.; $23$1,427.50; 800-745-3000. Orlando Roller Derby 2016 Season The Orlando Roller Derby Girls play against various teams from Florida. Sunday, 4:30-6:30 pm; Semoran Skateway, 2670 Cassel Creek Blvd., Casselberry; $8; 407-8349106; orlandoderbygirls.com. Orlando Solar Bears vs. Florida Everblades Ice hockey. Wednesday, 7 pm; Amway Center, 400 W. Church St.; $13.25-$44.75; 800-745-3000. Yoga in Lake Eola Park This weekly yoga group, which is taught by a rotating band of yogis, meets either at the northeast corner of the park near Panera Bread, or at the northwest corner by the amphitheater. Everyone is welcome to participate. Sundays, 11 am; Lake Eola Park, 195 N. Rosalind Ave.; $5 suggested donation. ■

BY R O B B R E ZS N Y

LULU E IG HT B A L L

BY EMILY FLAKE

you. It’s an unripe part of yourself that needs to be taught and tamed and cared for. Until you develop a better relationship with it, it will just keep testing you. P.S.: Now would be a good time to develop a better relationship with it.

ARIES (March 21-April 19) According to my astrological analysis, you would benefit profoundly from taking a ride in a jet fighter plane 70,000 feet above the earth. In fact, I think you really need to experience weightlessness as you soar faster than the speed of sound. Luckily, there’s an organization, MiGFlug [migflug. com], that can provide you with this healing thrill – I just hope you can afford the $18,000 price tag. APRIL FOOL! I do in fact think you should treat yourself to unprecedented thrills and transcendent adventures. But I bet you can accomplish that without being quite so extravagant. TAURUS (April 20-May 20) “People only get really interesting when they start to rattle the bars of their cages,” says philosopher Alain de Botton. If that’s true, you must be on the verge of becoming very interesting. Metaphorically speaking, you’re not just rattling the bars of your cage. You’re also smacking your tin cup against the bars and trying to saw through them with your plastic knife. APRIL FOOL! I lied. You’re not literally in a prison cell. And I got a bit carried away with the metaphor. But there is a grain of truth to what I said. You are getting close to breaking free of at least some of your mind-forged manacles. And it’s making you more attractive and intriguing. GEMINI (May 21-June 20) If I had to decide what natural phenomenon you most closely resemble right now, I’d consider comparing you to a warm, restless breeze or a busily playful dolphin. But my first choice would be the mushrooms known as Schizophyllum commune. They’re highly adaptable: able to go dormant when the weather’s dry and spring to life when rain comes. They really get around, too, making their homes on every continent except Antarctica. But the main reason I’d link you with them is that they come in over 28,000 different sexes. Their versatility is unprecedented. APRIL FOOL! I exaggerated a bit. It’s true that these days you’re polymorphous and multifaceted and well-rounded. But you’re probably not capable of expressing 28,000 varieties of anything. CANCER (June 21-July 22) “Whatever it is you’re seeking won’t come in the form you’re expecting,” warns Japanese novelist Haruki Murakami. If that’s true, why bother? Why expend all your precious yearning if the net result won’t even satisfy your yearning?! That’s why I advise you to ABANDON YOUR BELOVED PLANS! Save your energy for trivial wishes. That way you won’t be disappointed when they are fulfilled in unanticipated ways. APRIL FOOL! I was messing with you. It’s true that what you want won’t arrive in the form you’re expecting. But I bet the result will be even better than what you expected. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) You’re due to make a pilgrimage, aren’t you? It might be time to shave your head, sell your possessions and head out on a long trek to a holy place where you can get back in touch with what the hell you’re doing here on this planet. APRIL FOOL! I was kidding about the head-shaving and possessionsdumping. On the other hand, there might be value in embarking on a less melodramatic pilgrimage. I think you’re ready to seek radical bliss of a higher order – and get back in touch with what the hell you’re doing here on this planet. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Are you ready to fight the monster? Do you have the courage and strength and stamina and guile to overcome the ugly beast that’s blocking the path to the treasure? If not, turn around and head back to your comfort zone until you’re better prepared. APRIL FOOL! I lied. There is a monster, but it’s not the literal embodiment of a beastly adversary. Rather, it’s inside

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22) Your advice for the near future comes from poet Stephen Dunn. “If the Devil sits down,” he says, “offer companionship, tell her you’ve always admired her magnificent, false moves.” I think that’s an excellent plan! Maybe you’ll even be lucky enough to make the acquaintance of many different devils with a wide variety of magnificent, false moves. APRIL FOOL! I lied. In fact, I think you should avoid contact with all devils, no matter how enticing they might be. Now is a key time to surround yourself with positive influences. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21) In 1841, a British medical journal prescribed the following remedy for the common cold: “Nail a hat on the wall near the foot of your bed, then retire to that bed, and drink spirits until you see two hats.” My expert astrological analysis reveals that this treatment is likely to cure not just the sniffles, but also any other discomforts you’re suffering from, whether physical or emotional or spiritual. So I hope you own a hat, a hammer and nails. APRIL FOOL! I lied. The method I suggested probably won’t help alleviate what ails you. But here’s a strategy that might: Get rid of anything that’s superfluous, rotten, outdated or burdensome. SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21) To begin your oracle, I’ll borrow the words of author Ray Bradbury: “May you be in love every day for the next 20,000 days, and out of that love, remake a world.” I have reason to believe that this optimistic projection has a good chance of coming true for you. Imagine it: daily swoons of delight and rapture from now until the year 2071. APRIL FOOL! I lied, sort of. It would be foolish to predict that you’ll be giddy with amorous feelings nonstop for the next 54 years and 10 months. On the other hand, I don’t think it’s unrealistic for you to expect a lot of that sweet stuff over the course of the next three weeks. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) “I am tired of being brave,” groaned Anne Sexton in one of her poems. “I’m sick of following my dreams,” moaned comedian Mitch Hedberg, adding, “I’m just going to ask my dreams where they’re going and hook up with them later.” In my opinion, you have every right to unleash grumbles similar to Hedberg’s and Sexton’s. APRIL FOOL! The advice I just gave you is only half-correct. It’s true that you need and deserve a respite from your earnest struggles. Now is indeed a good time to take a break so you can recharge your spiritual batteries. But don’t you dare feel sorry for yourself. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18) In 1991, hikers in the Italian Alps discovered the well-preserved corpse of a Bronze Age hunter. Buried in the frigid terrain, the man who came to be known as Otzi the Iceman had been there for 5,000 years. Soon the museum that claimed his body began receiving inquiries from women who wanted to be impregnated with Otzi’s sperm. I think this is an apt metaphor for you. Consider the possibility that you might benefit from being fertilized by an influence from long ago. APRIL FOOL! I was just messing with you. It’s true you can generate good mojo by engaging with inspirational influences from the past. But I’d never urge you to be guided by a vulgar metaphor related to Otzi’s sperm. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20) Caligula was an eccentric Roman emperor who had a physical resemblance to a goat. He was sensitive about it. That’s why he made it illegal for anyone to refer to goats in his company. I mention this because I’d like to propose a list of words you should forbid to be used in your presence during the coming weeks: “money,” “cash,” “finances,” “loot,” “savings” or “investments.” Why? Because I’m afraid it would be distracting, even confusing or embarrassing, for you to think about these sore subjects right now. APRIL FOOL! I lied. The truth is, now is a perfect time for you to be focused on getting richer quicker.

Are you looking for a furry friend to adopt? Meet Rambo! Rambo (Animal ID A336534) is a 10-month-old pup looking for a forever home. Rambo is a little shy and nervous at ﬁrst, so he’d do well with an owner who is willing to be patient with him. Rambo warms up to you quickly, though, and his true personality shines! He is a sweet dog and he likes attention. Rambo is very mellow and enjoys being petted. He also loves to eat treats! If you are looking for a friendly and loving pup, this handsome boy will make a great addition to your family. For the month of April, fees for ownersurrendered pets will be waived in honor of our “Certified PreOwned Pets” adoption promotion.

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Rambo’s adoption fee has been waived because of this promotion. Orange County Animal Services is located at 2769 Conroy Road in Orlando, near the Mall at Millenia. The shelter is open 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. Monday through Saturday and 1 to 5 p.m. Sunday. For more information, please call 407-8363111 or visit ocnetpets.com.

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I was honored to speak at JCCSF – Jewish Community Center of San Francisco – last week as a part of their Uninhibited: About Sex lecture series. The audience submitted questions on cards, which were ably put to me by Jourdan Abel, who was wearing a wonderful uterus-themed sweater. (Check out my Instagram account, @dansavage, to see Abel’s sweater!) Here are some of the questions submitted by the uninhibited JCCSF audience that Abel and I didn’t manage to get to during our conversation. How do you combat homophobic remarks in a culture that condones and promotes homophobic tendencies?

You combat homophobia – and misogyny, its big sister – one terrified middle-schooler at a time. Bearing in mind, of course, that “terrified middle-schooler” is a state of mind, not an age bracket. Got any advice for a bi girl, formerly submissive, who wants to start dominating men?

designed to do and consequently does not do well. And that would be, of course, educating young people about sex. If we don’t want porn doing that, and we don’t, we need to create comprehensive sex ed programs that cover everything – hetero sex, queer sex, partnered sex, solo sex, gender identity, consent, kinks, and how to be a thoughtful, informed and critical consumer of porn. What is the one thing that concerns you most about the current political climate/election cycle?

Donald Trump getting the Republican nomination. I’m not at all concerned about the potential destruction/implosion of the GOP – those fuckers have it coming – but with the likelihood of political violence. I’m concerned that black and brown people – Mexicans, Muslims, African Americans – will be subjected to more political/ social/economic violence than they already are. People will die as a direct result of Trump getting the GOP nomination. This is a terrifying moment. What kind of sexual fluid or act would you name after Donald Trump?

Move to San Francisco – oh, wait. You’re already in San Francisco. Leave the house – get involved in local kink orgs, if you aren’t already involved, check out local sex-positive events (bawdystorytelling.com is a great place to start) and let people know what you’re looking for. There’s no shortage of submissive guys in the Bay Area, and no shortage of dominant women up for mentoring women who are curious about topping. What do you do when you can’t make your partner come?

Trump, as I pointed out in a previous column, already has an alternate/more accurate meaning. There is no authority higher than the Oxford English Dictionary, and here’s what you’ll find under “trump” at oed.com: “in reference to a sound like a trumpet … the act of breaking wind audibly.” So remember, kids, when you see Donald Trump standing in front of a microphone … Trump isn’t talking. He’s trumping. What is the etiquette when it comes to social media and open relationships?

Me? I hand him back his dick and go get myself some ice cream – but you shouldn’t do what I do when you can’t make your partner come. Here’s what you should do: Keep trying, ask your partner what they need, and encourage them, if need be, to “finish themselves off” (without pouting, without laying a guilt trip on them about how they’ve made you feel inadequate and without treating them like they’re broken). Cheerfully offer to hold ’em or play with their tits or eat their ass while they finish themselves off – or, hell, offer to go get ’em ice cream. Whatever helps! Porn is so accessible today. How has it affected society?

One positive effect (among many): Porn’s wider accessibility forced us to stop pretending there’s one kind of sex – heterosexual, man-on-top – that absolutely everyone is interested in. Thanks to the Interwebs, we can track what people are actually searching for (it’s not all hetero), where they’re searching for it (a shout-out to the great state of Utah, which has the highest porn consumption rates per capita in the nation!) and how long they’re lingering over it (long enough to finish themselves off). One negative effect (among many): The ubiquity of porn coupled with the general lousiness of sex education – in the United States and Canada – has resulted in porn doing something it isn’t

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It all depends on the preferences of the couple/throuple/quad/squad in question. If a particular couple, etc., wants to maintain the appearance of being monogamous, if they want to avoid stigma, judgment, freaked-out parents, etc., then they’re not going to want evidence of their open relationship popping up all over Facebook and/ or Instagram. If there’s internal disagreement in a particular couple/throuple/quad/squad about keeping things quiet on social media, not outing the person(s) who want to keep things discreet may be the price of admission their other partners have to pay. What was your favorite aspect of the orgy held in honor of your 50th birthday?

The

fact

that

wasn’t

invited.

#NotAnOrgyFan Uninhibited: About Sex continues through the end of May. Upcoming speakers and events include Esther Perel, Seth Stephens-Davidowitz, Nicole Prause, Jules Howard, films, poetry readings and live musical performances. For a full schedule of events: jccsf.org/arts-ideas/uninhibited. On the Lovecast, power poly kinkster Allena Gabosch on poly complications: savagelovecast.com

mail@savagelove.net

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IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY STATE OF FLORIDA JUVENILE DIVISION: 7/Dawson CASE NO.: DP14-480 IN THE INTEREST OF:M. C., DOB: 10/07/2014 A MINOR CHILD. SUMMONS AND NOTICE OF TPR ADVISORY HEARING STATE OF FLORIDA TO:STEPHAN HARRIS Address Unknown A Petition for Termination of Parental Rights under oath has been filed in this court regarding the above referenced child(ren), a copy of which is attached. You are to appear on May 12, 2016, at 9:00 a.m. at the Thomas S. Kirk Juvenile Justice Center, 2000 East Michigan Street, Orlando, FL 32806, before honorable Judge, Daniel P. Dawson, for a TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS ADVISORY HEARING. You must appear on the date and time specified. FAILURE TO PERSONALLY APPEAR AT THIS ADVISORY HEARING CONSTITUTES CONSENT TO THE TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS TO THESE CHILD(REN). IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR ON THE DATE AND TIME SPECIFIED YOU MAY LOSE ALL LEGAL RIGHTS AS A PARENT TO THE CHILDREN NAMED IN THE PETITION ATTACHED TO THIS NOTICE. IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR YOU MAY BE HELD IN CONTEMPT OF COURT.The mother/father are hereby advised, pursuant to §63.802(6) (g), Florida Statutes, that a parent whose rights have not yet been terminated has the right to seek a private adoptive placement for the child(ren), and to participate in a private adoption plan, through an adoption entity as defined in §63.032, Florida Statutes. If you are a person with a disability who needs any accommodation to participate in this proceeding, you are entitled, at no cost to you, to the provision of certain assistance. Please contact Court Administration, 425 N. Orange Avenue, Orlando, Florida 32801, telephone 407836-2303 within two working days of your receipt of this summons. If you are hearing or voice impaired, call 1-800955-8771. Witness my hand and seal of this court at Orlando, Orange County Florida on this 18th day of March, 2016. CLERK OF COURT By: /s/ Deputy Clerk Jill Fowler, Esquire, Florida Bar No.: 0045276, Senior Attorney for Children’s Legal Services, State of Florida, Department of Children and Families, 400 West Robinson Street, Suite N211, Orlando, FL 32801, (407) 317-7417 Telephone (407) 317-7126 - Fax. NOTICE OF PUBLIC AUCTION FOR MONIES DUE ON STORAGE LOCKERS LOCATED AT UHAUL COMPANY FACILITIES. STORAGE LOCATIONS AND TIMES ARE LISTED BELOW. ALL GOODS SOLD ARE HOUSEHOLD CONTENTS, MISCELLANEOUS OR RECOVERED GOODS. ALL AUCTIONS ARE HELD TO SATISFY OWNER’S LIEN FOR RENT AND FEES IN ACCORDANCE WITH FLORIDA STATUTES, SELF STORAGE ACT, SECTIONS 83.806 AND 83.807, STARTS AT 8 am and RUNS CONTINUOUSLY. Uhaul Ctr Ocoee-11410 W. Colonial Drive-Ocoee 04/13/16:1001 Erica Bynum, 1301 Mary Money, 1720 Megan Couch,2020 Thomas Canuelas, 2101 Ben Mcdonald Uhaul Stg Haines City-3307 Hwy 17-92 W-Haines City 04/13/16: A0142 Waldermar Pagan, E0525 Jessenia Rodriguez, G0783 Sheila Pergament Uhaul Ctr Hunters Creek-13301 S. Orange Blossom Trail-Orlando 04/13/16: 1014 Jamal El, 1056 William Bernazar, 1518 Michelle L Bowens, 1718 Sean Harris, 2054 Tracey Boss, 2403 Michael Morton, 2607 Mohammed El Mahgoub, 3108 Patrick Broadhurst, 3337 Vincent Stepter, 3404 Drink Robust Uhaul Stg Gatorland- 14651 Gatorland Dr-Orlando 04/13/16: 432 April Pullman, 457 Sheritta Clark, 671 Tillis Churchill, 687 Joel Rodriguez, 908 Liliam Moreira.

IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT, IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY, FLORIDA JUVENILE DIVISION: 07 CASE NO.: DP14-445 IN THE INTEREST OF: A.T. DOB: 09/23/2014, MINOR CHILD. SUMMONS AND NOTICE OF ADVISORY HEARING FOR TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS STATE OF FLORIDA TO: ASHLEY THOMPSON, Address Unknown WHEREAS a Petition for Termination of Parental Rights under oath has been filed in this court regarding the above-referenced children, a copy of which is attached, you are hereby commanded to appear before the Honorable Judge Timothy Shea on April 12, 2016 at 10:00 a.m., at Thomas S. Kirk Juvenile Justice Center, 2000 East Michigan Street, Orlando, Florida 32806 for a TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS ADVISORY HEARING. You must appear on the date and at the time specified. FAILURE TO PERSONALLY APPEAR AT THIS ADVISORY HEARING CONSTITUTES CONSENT TO THE TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS TO THESE CHILDREN. IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR ON THE DATE AND TIME SPECIFIED YOU MAY LOSE ALL LEGAL RIGHTS AS A PARENT TO THE CHILDREN NAMED IN THE PETITION ATTACHED TO THIS NOTICE. WITNESS my hand and seal of this court at Orlando, Orange County, Florida this 1st day of March, 2016. This summons has been issued at the request of: Jennifer Shepard, Esquire, FBN: 93027, Attorney for the State of Florida, Children’s Legal Services, 400 West Robinson Street, Suite N211, Orlando, Florida 32801, (407) 317-7643-Telephone, (407) 317-7126Fax, jennifer.shepard@myflfamilies.com CLERK OF THE CIRCUIT COURT By: /s/ Rochelle Marrero Deputy Clerk (Court Seal). If you are a person with a disability who needs any accommodation in order to participate in this proceeding, you are entitled, at no cost to you, to the provision of certain assistance. Please contact Court Administration, at 425 N. Orange Avenue, Orlando, Florida 32801, telephone (407) 836-2303, not later than (7) days prior to the proceeding. If you are hearing or voice impaired, call 1-800-955-8771. IN THE CIRCUIT COURT FOR ORANGE COUNTY, FLORIDA PROBATE DIVISION IN RE: ESTATE OF CHRIS EDWARD JOHNSON, Deceased. File No. 2016 CP 0087, Division: Circuit Court NOTICE TO CREDITORS The administration of the Estate of Chris Edward Johnson, deceased (“Decedent”), whose date of death was July 25, 2015, is pending in the Circuit Court for Orange County, Florida, Probate Division, the address of which is 425 N Orange Avenue, Orlando, FL 32801. The names and addresses of the personal representative and the personal representative’s attorney are set forth below. All creditors of the Decedent and other persons having claims or demands against Decedent’s estate on whom a copy of this notice is required to be served must file their claims with this court WITHIN THE LATER OF 3 MONTHS AFTER THE TIME OF THE FIRST PUBLICATION OF THIS NOTICE OR 30 DAYS AFTER THE DATE OF SERVICE OF A COPY OF THIS NOTICE ON THEM. All other creditors of the Decedent and other persons having claims or demands against Decedent’s estate must file their claims with this Court WITHIN 3 MONTHS AFTER THE DATE OF THE FIRST PUBLICATION OF THIS NOTICE. ALL CLAIMS NOT FILED WITHIN THE TIME PERIODS SET FORTH IN SECTION 733.702 OF THE FLORIDA PROBATE CODE WILL BE FOREVER BARRED. NOTWITHSTANDING THE TIME PERIODS SET FORTH ABOVE, ANY CLAIM FILED TWO (2) YEARS OR MORE AFTER THE DECEDENT’S DATE OF DEATH IS BARRED. The date of first publication of this notice is 3/30/16. Attorney for Personal Representative: /s/ Katrina Thomas Stone, Esq., Attorney for Petitioner, Florida Bar No. 17486, Stone & Gerken, P.A., 4850 N. Highway 19A, Mount Dora, FL 32757, Telephone: (352) 357-0330. Personal Representative: /s/ Nathan Purl Johnson, 5910 Plymouth Sorrento Road, Apopka, FL 32712.

IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY STATE OF FLORIDA JUVENILE DIVISION: 7/Dawson CASE NO.: DP05-387 IN THE INTEREST OF:X.B. DOB: 06/21/2001, Minor Child. SUMMONS AND NOTICE OF TPR ADVISORY HEARING STATE OF FLORIDA TO:Maurice Bullard Address Unknown A Petition for Termination of Parental Rights under oath has been filed in this court regarding the above referenced child(ren), a copy of which is attached. You are to appear on May 2, 2016, at 3:15 p.m. at the Thomas S. Kirk Juvenile Justice Center, 2000 East Michigan Street, Orlando, FL 32806, before honorable Judge, Daniel P. Dawson, for a TPR Advisory. You must appear on the date and time specified. FAILURE TO PERSONALLY APPEAR AT THIS ADVISORY HEARING CONSTITUTES CONSENT TO THE TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS TO THESE CHILD(REN). IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR ON THE DATE AND TIME SPECIFIED YOU MAY LOSE ALL LEGAL RIGHTS AS A PARENT TO THE CHILDREN NAMED IN THE PETITION ATTACHED TO THIS NOTICE. IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR YOU MAY BE HELD IN CONTEMPT OF COURT.The mother/father are hereby advised, pursuant to §63.802(6)(g), Florida Statutes, that a parent whose rights have not yet been terminated has the right to seek a private adoptive placement for the child(ren), and to participate in a private adoption plan, through an adoption entity as defined in §63.032, Florida Statutes. As required by §63.165, Florida Statutes, the Department further gives notice of the existence and purpose of a state registry of adoption information. The purpose of the Florida Adoption Reunion Registry is to reunite persons separated by adoption where both parties seek such reunion. Persons affected by an adoption may list themselves and their contact information on the registry. Registration is completely voluntary. Additional information is available at http://adoptflorida.com/ Reunion-Registry.htm. Contact information for the registry is as follows: Florida Adoption Reunion Registry, Florida Department of Children and Families,1317 Winewood Blvd., Tallahassee, Florida 32399-0700. If you are a person with a disability who needs any accommodation to participate in this proceeding, you are entitled, at no cost to you, to the provision of certain assistance. Please contact Court Administration, 425 N. Orange Avenue, Orlando, Florida 32801, telephone 407-836-2303 within two working days of your receipt of this summons. If you are hearing or voice impaired, call 1-800-955-8771. Witness my hand and seal of this court at Orlando, Orange County Florida on this 8th day of March, 2016. CLERK OF COURT By: /s/ Deputy Clerk Jill Fowler, Esquire, Florida Bar No.: 0045276, Senior Attorney for Children’s Legal Services, State of Florida, Department of Children and Families, 400 West Robinson Street, Suite N211, Orlando, FL 32801, (407) 317-7417 - Telephone (407) 317-7126 - Fax.

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IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY STATE OF FLORIDA JUVENILE DIVISION: 7/Dawson CASE NO.: DP14-480 IN THE INTEREST OF:M. C., DOB: 10/07/2014 A MINOR CHILD. SUMMONS AND NOTICE OF TPR ADVISORY HEARING STATE OF FLORIDA TO:CEDRIK JONES Address Unknown A Petition for Termination of Parental Rights under oath has been filed in this court regarding the above referenced child(ren), a copy of which is attached. You are to appear on May 12, 2016, at 9:00 a.m. at the Thomas S. Kirk Juvenile Justice Center, 2000 East Michigan Street, Orlando, FL 32806, before honorable Judge, Daniel P. Dawson, for a TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS ADVISORY HEARING. You must appear on the date and time specified. FAILURE TO PERSONALLY APPEAR AT THIS ADVISORY HEARING CONSTITUTES CONSENT TO THE TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS TO THESE CHILD(REN). IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR ON THE DATE AND TIME SPECIFIED YOU MAY LOSE ALL LEGAL RIGHTS AS A PARENT TO THE CHILDREN NAMED IN THE PETITION ATTACHED TO THIS NOTICE. IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR YOU MAY BE HELD IN CONTEMPT OF COURT.The mother/father are hereby advised, pursuant to §63.802(6) (g), Florida Statutes, that a parent whose rights have not yet been terminated has the right to seek a private adoptive placement for the child(ren), and to participate in a private adoption plan, through an adoption entity as defined in §63.032, Florida Statutes. If you are a person with a disability who needs any accommodation to participate in this proceeding, you are entitled, at no cost to you, to the provision of certain assistance. Please contact Court Administration, 425 N. Orange Avenue, Orlando, Florida 32801, telephone 407836-2303 within two working days of your receipt of this summons. If you are hearing or voice impaired, call 1-800955-8771. Witness my hand and seal of this court at Orlando, Orange County Florida on this 18th day of March, 2016. CLERK OF COURT By: /s/ Deputy Clerk Jill Fowler, Esquire, Florida Bar No.: 0045276, Senior Attorney for Children’s Legal Services, State of Florida, Department of Children and Families, 400 West Robinson Street, Suite N211, Orlando, FL 32801, (407) 317-7417 Telephone (407) 317-7126 - Fax. IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT, IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY, FLORIDA IN RE THE MARRIAGE OF: FABIANA RIVERA, Petitioner/Wife, and REINALDO RIVERA J.R., Respondent/ Husband. CASE NO.: 2015DR014684O NOTICE OF ACTION FOR DISSOLUTION OF MARRIAGE To Mr. Reinaldo Rivera, Jr., 97 Vincent Street, Apartment 2, Perth Amboy, New Jersey 08861 YOU ARE HEREBY NOTIFIED that an action has been filed against you and that you are required to serve a copy of your written defenses, if any, on petitioner or petitioner’s attorney: Gabriel Adam, Esquire, The Adam Law Firm, 111. E. Lake Mary Blvd. Sute 107, Sanford, Florida 32773, on or before March , 20 6 and file the original ith the Clerk of the Circuit Court at 425 N. Orange Avenue, Orlando, Florida 32801before service on Petitioner or immediately thereafter. If you fail to do so, a Default may be entered against you for the relief demanded in the petition. Copies of all court documents in this case, including orders, are available at the Cler of the Circuit Court’s office. You may review these documents upon request. You must keep the Clerk of the Circuit Court’s Office notified of your current address. You may file Florida Family Law Form 12.915, Notice of Current Address.) Future papers in this lawsuit will be mailed to the address on record at the Cler ’s Office. WARNING: Rule 12.285, Florida Family Law Rules of Procedure, requires certain automatic disclosure of documents and information. Failure to comply can result in sanctions, including dismissal or striking of pleadings. DATED: 3/1/16 CLERK OF THE CIRCUIT COURT (SEAL) By: /s/ Deputy Clerk.

IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT, IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY, FLORIDA DIVISION: 07/DAWSON, PINE HILLS/ WESTGATE CENTER, CASE NO.: DP11-89 IN THE INTEREST OF: M.N., a female child, DOB: 08/25/2014, a child SUMMONS AND NOTICE OF ADVISORY HEARING FOR TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS STATE OF FLORIDA To: Michael D. Neal Jr.,: Address unknown, WHEREAS a Petition for Termination of Parental Rights under oath has been filed in this court regarding the above referenced child. You are hereby commanded to appear before Judge Daniel P. Dawson on May 31, 2016, at 10:00 a.m. at the Juvenile Justice Center, 2000 East Michigan Street, Orlando, Florida 32806, for a TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS ADVISORY HEARING. You must appear on the date and at the time specified. FAILURE TO PERSONALLY APPEAR AT THIS ADVISORY HEARING CONSTITUTES CONSENT TO THE TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS TO THIS CHILD. IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR ON THE DATE AND TIME SPECIFIED, YOU MIGHT LOSE ALL LEGAL RIGHTS AS A PARENT TO THE CHILD NAMED IN THE PETITION ATTACHED TO THIS NOTICE. Pursuant to Sections 39.802(4)(d) and 63.082(6)(g), Florida Statutes, you are hereby informed of the availability of private placement with an adoption entity, as defined in Section 63.032(3), Florida Statutes. WITNESS my hand at the Clerk of said Court and the Seal, this 23rd day of March, 2016. CLERK OF THE CIRCUIT COURT (Court Seal) By: (Signed) Deputy Clerk. This summons has been issued at the request of: Stephanie Evans, Esquire, Florida ar No.: 00 0, Children’s Legal Services, State of Florida, Department of Children and Families, 822 S. Kirkman Road, Suite 200, Orlando, FL 32811, (407) 563-2380 - Telephone, Stephanie.evans@myflfamilies.com. IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT, IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY, FLORIDA JUVENILE DIVISION: 07 CASE NO.: DP14-366 IN THE INTEREST OF: N.M. DOB: 12/30/1999, W.P. DOB: 03/28/2007, S.M. DOB: 07/18/2014 MINOR CHILDREN. SUMMONS AND NOTICE OF ADVISORY HEARING FOR TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS STATE OF FLORIDA TO: WILLIAM PERRY, Address Unknown WHEREAS a Petition for Termination of Parental Rights under oath has been filed in this court regarding the above referenced children, a copy of which is attached, you are hereby commanded to appear before the Honorable Judge Daniel Dawson on May 2, 2016 at 10:00 a.m., at Thomas S. Kirk Juvenile Justice Center, 2000 East Michigan Street, Orlando, Florida 32806 for a TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS ADVISORY HEARING. You must appear on the date and at the time specified. FAILURE TO PERSONALLY APPEAR AT THIS ADVISORY HEARING CONSTITUTES CONSENT TO THE TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS TO THESE CHILDREN. IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR ON THE DATE AND TIME SPECIFIED YOU MAY LOSE ALL LEGAL RIGHTS AS A PARENT TO THE CHILDREN NAMED IN THE PETITION ATTACHED TO THIS NOTICE. WITNESS my hand and seal of this court at Orlando, Orange County, Florida this 1st day of March, 2016. This summons has been issued at the request of: Crystal Mincey, Esquire, FBN: 89158, Attorney for the State of Florida, Children’s Legal Services, 00 West Robinson Street, Suite N211, Orlando, Florida 32801, (407) 317-7643-Telephone, (407) 317-7126-Fax, crystal. mincey@myflfamilies.com. CLER OF THE CIRCUIT COURT By: /s/ Rochelle Marrero Deputy Clerk (Court Seal). If you are a person with a disability who needs any accommodation in order to participate in this proceeding, you are entitled, at no cost to you, to the provision of certain assistance. Please contact Court Administration, at 425 N. Orange Avenue, Orlando, Florida 32801, telephone (407) 836-2303, not later than (7) days prior to the proceeding. If you are hearing or voice impaired, call 1-800-955-8771.

IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY STATE OF FLORIDA JUVENILE DIVISION: 7/Dawson CASE NO.:DP14-240 IN THE INTEREST OF:J.E. DOB: 08/13/2013, C.E. DOB: 03/13/2015 Minor Children. SUMMONS AND NOTICE OF TPR ADVISORY HEARING STATE OF FLORIDA TO:Meghan Eller Address Unknown A Petition for Termination of Parental Rights under oath has been filed in this court regarding the above referenced child(ren), a copy of which is attached. You are to appear on May 18, 2016, at 1:45 p.m. at the Thomas S. Kirk Juvenile Justice Center, 2000 East Michigan Street, Orlando, FL 32806, before honorable Judge, Daniel P. Dawson, for a TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS ADVISORY HEARING. You must appear on the date and time specified. FAILURE TO PERSONALLY APPEAR AT THIS ADVISORY HEARING CONSTITUTES CONSENT TO THE TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS TO THESE CHILD(REN). IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR ON THE DATE AND TIME SPECIFIED YOU MAY LOSE ALL LEGAL RIGHTS AS A PARENT TO THE CHILDREN NAMED IN THE PETITION ATTACHED TO THIS NOTICE. Pursuant to Sections 39.802(4)(d) and 63.082(6)(g), Florida Statutes, you are hereby informed of the availability of private placement with an adoption entity, as defined in Section 63.032(3), Florida Statutes. If you are a person with a disability who needs any accommodation to participate in this proceeding, you are entitled, at no cost to you, to the provision of certain assistance. Please contact Court Administration, 425 N. Orange Avenue, Orlando, Florida 32801, telephone 407-836-2303 within two working days of your receipt of this summons. If you are hearing or voice impaired, call 1-800-955-8771. Witness my hand and seal of this court at Orlando, Orange County Florida on this 22nd day of March, 2016. CLERK OF COURT By: /s/ Deputy Clerk Jill Fowler, Esquire, Florida Bar No.: 0045276, Senior Attorney for Children’s Legal Services, State of Florida, Department of Children and Families, 400 West Robinson Street, Suite N211, Orlando, FL 32801, (407) 317-7417 - Telephone (407) 3177126 - Fax.

NOTICE OF AUCTION Personal property of Miguel Otera, Parking Space #8, will be sold for cash to satisfy o ner’s lien in accordance with Florida Statutes Self Storage Facility Act on April 16 at 9 AM. Property consists of 1997 Ford F 150 XL Club Cab VIN # 1FTDXI720VNB17498. Sale to be held at premises of South Orlando Mini-Warehouse, 414 Fairlane Avenue, Orlando, FL 32809.

IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT, IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY, FLORIDA JUVENILE DIVISION: 07 CASE NO.: DP14-366 IN THE INTEREST OF: N.M. DOB: 12/30/1999, W.P. DOB: 03/28/2007, S.M. DOB: 07/18/2014 MINOR CHILDREN. SUMMONS AND NOTICE OF ADVISORY HEARING FOR TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS STATE OF FLORIDA TO: VALERIE MALLOCH, Address Unknown WHEREAS a Petition for Termination of Parental Rights under oath has been filed in this court regarding the above referenced children, a copy of which is attached, you are hereby commanded to appear before the Honorable Judge Daniel Dawson on May 2, 2016 at 10:00 a.m., at Thomas S. Kirk Juvenile Justice Center, 2000 East Michigan Street, Orlando, Florida 32806 for a TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS ADVISORY HEARING. You must appear on the date and at the time specified. FAILURE TO PERSONALLY APPEAR AT THIS ADVISORY HEARING CONSTITUTES CONSENT TO THE TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS TO THESE CHILDREN. IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR ON THE DATE AND TIME SPECIFIED YOU MAY LOSE ALL LEGAL RIGHTS AS A PARENT TO THE CHILDREN NAMED IN THE PETITION ATTACHED TO THIS NOTICE. WITNESS my hand and seal of this court at Orlando, Orange County, Florida this 1st day of March, 2016. This summons has been issued at the request of: Crystal Mincey, Esquire, FBN: 89158, Attorney for the State of Florida, Children’s Legal Services, 00 West Robinson Street, Suite N211, Orlando, Florida 32801, (407) 317-7643-Telephone, (407) 317-7126-Fax, crystal. mincey@myflfamilies.com. CLER OF THE CIRCUIT COURT By: /s/ Rochelle Marrero Deputy Clerk (Court Seal). If you are a person with a disability who needs any accommodation in order to participate in this proceeding, you are entitled, at no cost to you, to the provision of certain assistance. Please contact Court Administration, at 425 N. Orange Avenue, Orlando, Florida 32801, telephone (407) 836-2303, not later than (7) days prior to the proceeding. If you are hearing or voice impaired, call 1-800-955-8771.

IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT, IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY, FLORIDA JUVENILE DIVISION: 07 CASE NO.: DP14-366 IN THE INTEREST OF: N.M. DOB: 12/30/1999, W.P. DOB: 03/28/2007, S.M. DOB: 07/18/2014 MINOR CHILDREN. SUMMONS AND NOTICE OF ADVISORY HEARING FOR TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS STATE OF FLORIDA TO: TIMOTHY TEMPLES, Address Unknown WHEREAS a Petition for Termination of Parental Rights under oath has been filed in this court regarding the above referenced children, a copy of which is attached, you are hereby commanded to appear before the Honorable Judge Daniel Dawson on May 2, 2016 at 10:00 a.m., at Thomas S. Kirk Juvenile Justice Center, 2000 East Michigan Street, Orlando, Florida 32806 for a TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS ADVISORY HEARING. You must appear on the date and at the time specified. FAILURE TO PERSONALLY APPEAR AT THIS ADVISORY HEARING CONSTITUTES CONSENT TO THE TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS TO THESE CHILDREN. IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR ON THE DATE AND TIME SPECIFIED YOU MAY LOSE ALL LEGAL RIGHTS AS A PARENT TO THE CHILDREN NAMED IN THE PETITION ATTACHED TO THIS NOTICE. WITNESS my hand and seal of this court at Orlando, Orange County, Florida this 1st day of March, 2016. This summons has been issued at the request of: Crystal Mincey, Esquire, FBN: 89158, Attorney for the State of Florida, Children’s Legal Services, 00 West Robinson Street, Suite N211, Orlando, Florida 32801, (407) 317-7643-Telephone, (407) 317-7126-Fax, crystal. mincey@myflfamilies.com. CLER OF THE CIRCUIT COURT By: /s/ Rochelle Marrero Deputy Clerk (Court Seal). If you are a person with a disability who needs any accommodation in order to participate in this proceeding, you are entitled, at no cost to you, to the provision of certain assistance. Please contact Court Administration, at 425 N. Orange Avenue, Orlando, Florida 32801, telephone (407) 836-2303, not later than (7) days prior to the proceeding. If you are hearing or voice impaired, call 1-800-955-8771.

NOTICE OF SALE Vehicles will be sold as is, no warranty. Seller reserves the right to refuse any bid. Terms of bids are cash only. Buyer must have funds on hand at time of sale: 1999 Dodge VIN# 2B4FP25B2XR221785 1996 Isuzu VIN# 4S2CK58V1T4310065 To be sold at auction at 8:00 a.m. on April 13, 2016, 7301 Gardner Street, Winter Park, FL. 32792 Constellation Towing & Recovery LLC

NOTICE OF PUBLIC SALE APRIL, 18 2016 at 8:00AM at My Towing Company 1800 N Forsyth Rd., Orlando FL 32807. Will sell the following vehicles to the highest bidder 05 TOYOTA VIN # 1NXBR32E25Z343770 98 LEXUS VIN# JT8BF28G2W0085516 99 FORD VIN # 1FAFP46V8XF180941 Term of the sale are cash. My Towing Company reserves the right to accept or reject any and all bids. Vehicle sold as is, no warranty, no guarantee, no title.

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IN THE CIRCUIT COURT OF THE NINTH JUDICIAL CIRCUIT, IN AND FOR ORANGE COUNTY, FLORIDA JUVENILE DIVISION: 07 CASE NO.: DP13-273 IN THE INTEREST OF: J.H.. DOB: 04/04/13, MINOR CHILD. SUMMONS AND NOTICE OF ADVISORY HEARING FOR TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS STATE OF FLORIDA TO: REJERRIO BURTON, Address Unknown WHEREAS a Petition for Termination of Parental Rights under oath has been filed in this court regarding the above referenced children, a copy of which is attached, you are hereby commanded to appear before the Honorable Judge Daniel Dawson on May 26, 2016 at 9:30 a.m., at Thomas S. Kirk Juvenile Justice Center, 2000 East Michigan Street, Orlando, Florida 32806 for a TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS ADVISORY HEARING. You must appear on the date and at the time specified. FAILURE TO PERSONALLY APPEAR AT THIS ADVISORY HEARING CONSTITUTES CONSENT TO THE TERMINATION OF PARENTAL RIGHTS TO THESE CHILDREN. IF YOU FAIL TO APPEAR ON THE DATE AND TIME SPECIFIED YOU MAY LOSE ALL LEGAL RIGHTS AS A PARENT TO THE CHILDREN NAMED IN THE PETITION ATTACHED TO THIS NOTICE. WITNESS my hand and seal of this court at Orlando, Orange County, Florida this 23RD day of March, 2016. This summons has been issued at the request of: Crystal Mincey, Esquire, FBN: 89158, Attorney for the State of Florida, Children’s Legal Services, 400 West Robinson Street, Suite N211, Orlando, Florida 32801, (407) 317-7643-Telephone, (407) 317-7126Fax, crystal.mincey@myflfamilies.com. CLERK OF THE CIRCUIT COURT By: /s/ Keyanna Fountain Deputy Clerk (Court Seal). If you are a person with a disability who needs any accommodation in order to participate in this proceeding, you are entitled, at no cost to you, to the provision of certain assistance. Please contact Court Administration, at 425 N. Orange Avenue, Orlando, Florida 32801, telephone (407) 836-2303, not later than (7) days prior to the proceeding. If you are hearing or voice impaired, call 1-800-955-8771. NOTICE OF SALE The following vehicles will be sold at Public Auction for cash to satisfy lien pursuant to F.S. 713.78 on April 15, 2016 at 9:00 am at Dynamic Towing, 6408 Old Cheney Hwy., Orlando, FL. 407-273-5880 2003 Maza JM1BJ225431162366 1997 Hond 2HGEJ6624VH514288 2005 Suzi JS1GN7CA252103228 200 Infi JNKCV54EX4M816633 2007 Hond JH2PC40017M010544

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Contract Processor / Administration (Orlando) Bluegreen Vacations 6137191

Software Technician Exxelia Dearborn Electronics Inc. 6133511

Account Manager Esterline Landscape 6133570 Sales Analyst Tourico Holidays Inc. 6133718 Owner Referral Vacation Sales Advisor Hilton Grand Vacations 6137184 Financial Aid Solutions Developer Full Sail University 6136632 Crew Leader City of Orlando 6137285 Registeres Nurse - PCU - FT St. Cloud Regional Medical Center 6136555 RN Wound Care St. Cloud Regional Medical Center 6133568 Supervisor Creative Fabrication/Figure Finish Universal Orlando 6133533 Lifeguard City of Casselberry 6133463

Painter Universal Orlando 6137280

Paid Internship Entry Level Sales Recruiter / Human Resources Marketing Consultants of Orlando 6137292

Physician Assistant - Mental Health IMPOWER (Intervention Services, Inc) 6137350

ORLANDO WEEKLY ● MARCH 30-APRIL 5, 2016

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orlandoweekly.com

Cashier Beth’s Burger Bar - Edgewood 6136705

Employment CASTO is in search of a F/T Maintenance Technician for Winter Park Village. Must have 2+ years of experience in a similar role. Visit http:// castoinfo.com/ for more information. Resumes may be sent to ssoulsby@ castoinfo.com.

Technical Customer Liaison Exxelia Dearborn Electronics Inc. 6133509 Faculty Instructor - Graphic Design Courses The Los Angeles Film School 6136935 Houseperson Embassy Suites Orlando - Lake Buena Vista South 6136932 Guest Experience Hosts Job Fair Merlin Entertainments 6136710 Driver - Mover - Packer - Central Florida Two Men and a Truck - Central Florida 6136633 Pest Control Operator Walt Disney World Resort 6136092

Job Listing for Music Teacher Piano, Drum, Guitar and Violin teachers wanted in the greater Orlando area. This job is for group and private in home music teaching lessons. Seeking fun, creative, responsible, experienced individuals ho are loo ing for flexible hours and schedules. We offer $30$70/hour for full and part time jobs in Orlando for great music teachers with a warm energy and a track record of reliability. Send resume to opmi@opmilessons.com.

PAID IN ADVANCE! Make $1000 A Week Mailing Brochures From Home! No Experience Required. Helping home workers since 2001! Genuine Opportunity. Start Immediately! www.MailingHelp.com (AAN CAN)

orlandoweekly.com

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MARCH 30-APRIL 5, 2016

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ORLANDO WEEKLY