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sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 3
4 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 • sacurrent.com
Y A D N U S Y A D S R U TH 2TH-15TH
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Located at I-10 and Loop 410 on Fredericksburg Rd. sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 5
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6 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 • sacurrent.com
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sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 7
IN THIS
FIRST WORDS
1
On “Voter Turnout Is Low as Texans Approve 7 Constitutional Amendments”//Gus Martinez: I went & voted *weeks* ago. Only other people in the place were the 2 poll workers, one of which who practically begged me to remind everyone to get out & vote. Can’t wait for folks to bitch about how certain pols don’t reside in Austin, and get reminded that this election helped decide that certain electoral offices would no longer require the incumbent to live there. [sic] On “Chingo Bling Releases ‘Fuck Trump’ Koozie //Jo Annie Chiebeton: do I have to? On “14 of Texas’ 100 Most Congested Roadways Are in San Antonio”//Fiona Rabbitsealpup: The fact that Bandera road is not listed on this map makes it null and void. All the areas of San Antonio listed as congested take me 10-15 minutes to traverse, while the tiny 3 mile stretch of Bandera can take me 30 to 45 minutes during a peak traffic time, and even longer if a light is out [sic] On “Will UTSA Implement Gun-Free Zones?”// Jimmy Castor: Darn it. If only the shooters in those tragedies knew it was a free gun zone, all those lives would have been saved! Maybe they should have giant advertising signs that reads it’s a free gun zone please [sic] turn back, in case shooters missed the small ones. [sic] • Send your thoughts, comments or kudos to letters@sacurrent.com
ISSUE Issue 15_45 /// November 11–17, 2015
10
NEWS
Newsmonger Hate speech, indigenous spurned and no sanctuary
32
CALENDAR
Our top picks for the week
SCREENS
20
ARTS + CULTURE
Saytown Texts Yes, there’s a Selena emoji Broken Home Familial, political strife in Karen Olsson’s second novel Lighting up La Villita Diwali lights up Downtown
35
Truth Among the Lies Kira Leigh breaks the mold
FOOD
43
NIGHTLIFE
Goblin Italian horror-rockers Goblin score your dreams
Sophomore Slump Some hits, some misses for Viva Vegeria
Law & Terroir Funky, natural vinos at La Cruz de Comal
We’re All Nazis Nazi huntin’ we go
Snap, Crackle & Pop Slurp up your cereal milk at Joseph E. Coffee
Bottle & Tap These guys are taking an extremely scientific approach to making beer
Culinary Calendar 5 ways to get your drink/grub on this week Flavor File The holiday menus are already lining up
49
MUSIC
I Talked with a Zombi The Pittsburgh outfit takes a bite out of San Antonio Why Merle Matters The poet of the common man Krall Space Diana Krall gets gloomy on Wallflower Music Calendar What to see and hear this week
8 CURRENT • November 4–10 2015 • sacurrent.com
14
Going for Goal Will a new deal make SA a shoo-in for MLS?
35
31
29
59
ETC.
Savage Love Jonesin’ Crossword Freewill Astrology This Modern World
ON THE
COVER These SA-specific emojis — we tried to hit all the important ones — will be available for download online. Illustrations by Lee DeVito Art direction by Rick Fisher and Sarah Flood-Baumann
sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 9
NEWS
GABBY MATA
BEXAR-O-METER Checking the temperature of events in Bexar County and beyond
• Most Second Amendment advocates stick to their talking point, but some — not pictured here — try to intimidate gun control supporters with racism.
NEWSMONGER Gun Signs Spur Racist Messages// Indigenous Peoples Spurned Again // Holding Back Funding for Sanctuary Cities Hate Speech During the last legislative session, freshman Rep. Diego Bernal, a former San Antonio City Council member, fought hard against Texas’ new open carry law for handguns. He lost. However, business owners are allowed to prohibit open carry in their establishments. To do so, they must post what’s called a Penal Code Section 30.07 sign. These signs follow strict regulations for wording, size of text and appearance. Well, to the ire of Second Amendment advocates, Bernal created a bunch and is handing them out for free to businesses that want to prohibit the open carrying of handguns on their premises. Cue the nut jobs who are angry that Bernal is helping people comply with the law. Bernal took to social media last week to post a couple of the racist messages he received as a result of his efforts. One guy, named Bruce, asked whether Bernal’s name was “Pedro” or “Heime” and told him to go back to Mexico, explaining that he hopes all
TIMMY!
MARK REAGAN/@210REAGAN
the “wetbacks” are deported from this country. You know who he’s voting for. Then there’s William Sullivan, who, not surprisingly, uses a Confederate flag for his Facebook profile picture. “I’ve got a great idea! Why don’t you take your sorry gun banning ass and go back to mexico [sic]?,” Sullivan wrote on Bernal’s profile. To his credit, Bernal is taking this stupidity in stride. “It’s hilarious. I’ve dealt with bullies before. All they’re good for is providing material for my next career as a standup,” he said. Disappearing Indigenous The Texas Indigenous Council’s Antonio Diaz thought Bexar County’s decision to recognize October 12 as Indigenous Peoples Day would propel the San Antonio City Council in the same direction. And it appeared that city leadership was going to take up the issue — and they still may — but it didn’t happen on October 29, the day City Councilman Rey Saldaña said he would bring a resolution recognizing Indigenous Peoples Day to a vote. Diaz said he went to City Hall and questioned the mayor and city manager’s receptionist, who called other staff. “Now I wait until the Mayor [Ivy Taylor] okays a date for the first Thursday of November,” Diaz said via email, indicating he thinks they just forgot about it. As of deadline, a draft City Council agenda for November 12 — the first
10 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 • sacurrent.com
Thursday council meets this month — didn’t include the resolution. Taylor indicated in a press release last month that she joins the Christopher Columbus Italian Society in support of Indigenous Peoples Day and would vote for the measure on October 29. No Sanctuary Texas Gov. Greg “Slash and Burn” Abbott continued cherry-picking issues that play to his right wing, Tea Party base of support by threatening to withhold grant funding from Sanctuary cities — places where law enforcement doesn’t ask people about immigration status. Early last week, Abbott targeted Dallas County Sheriff Lupe Valdez by threatening to take action against her after she implemented a policy to not hold people accused of minor offenses an extra 48 hours for U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE). Ironically, 16 people filed a lawsuit against Valdez that same day for honoring those ICE detainers. A few days later, he sent letters to all Texas sheriffs, announcing he would withhold grant funding from departments that didn’t honor ICE detainers. Again, it looks like Abbott really has a soft spot for the federal government, contrary to his mission to sue President Barack “Not my President” Obama. After all, Obama’s deported more people than any other president in history. That’s a policy Abbott can get behind. mreagan@sacurrent.com
Unstoppable Virgin Islander continues breaking NBA records
OZZY’S APOLOGY The Prince of Darkness is sorry he pissed on the Alamo Cenotaph
MEXICAN MARIJUANA The country takes a step toward pot legalization
FASHION WEEK Prominent organizer accused of theft
BULLET HITS BURBANK Stray bullet strikes classroom window
NO ONE VOTES 11 percent of Texans showed up at the polls
HERO Confused Houstonians vote down equal rights ordinance
Get FREE, confidential, in-person help OPEN ENROLLMENT ENDS JANUARY 31, 2016
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TRADE-IN/TRADE-UP EVENT NOV. 12 THRU NOV. 18
BUY, SELL OR TRADE USED AND VINTAGE GEAR GUITAR CENTER WILL EVALUATE YOUR GEAR AND MAKE OFFERS ON QUALIFYING ITEMS Guitar Center San Antonio 7325 San Pedro Ave. San Antonio, TX 210-348-7225 For more locations, visit guitarcenter.com.
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sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 11 10/26/15 2:00 PM
NEWS
COURTESY SAN ANTONIO SCORPIONS
GOING FOR GOAL Does a new deal make SA a lock for MLS? MICHAEL MARKS/@MICHAELPMARKS
12 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 • sacurrent.com
develop a plan with our ownership to determine when we go further, because we will,” Garber said to reporters in April. “We will expand this league beyond 24 teams. It’s not an if, it’s a when.” New clubs must pay an entrance fee of $100 million – a figure that could increase by the time the league is ready to grow again. And the new ownership group must assuage any doubts about San Antonio’s lackluster television market and median household income. Hope is optimistic that if any group could do that though, it’s the one that’s molded the Spurs into a model franchise for all of professional sports. “Nobody can doubt the abilities of Spurs Sports and Entertainment to put on a successful program,” Hope said. San Antonio has another advantage few other cities can boast: a soccer-specific stadium that’s already in place. MLS officials have stressed that they prefer cities with arenas built solely for the beautiful game. But Toyota Field, which currently seats about 8,000 people, would need some adjustments. Making the necessary upgrades for an MLS-caliber facility – including installing about 10,000 more seats, building luxury boxes and upgrading other infrastructure – could cost $45 million. That could be covered by some combination of public and private funds. In the meantime, it’s unclear what will happen to the city’s current professional soccer team, the San Antonio Scorpions. Spurs Sports and Entertainment will field a team in the third-tier United Soccer League. That leaves the Scorpions, which play in the second-tier North American Soccer League, in limbo. Hartman donates all the revenue from the team to support the special needs community. He said in a statement he’d ensure that any future club supported the same interest. “Soccer for a Cause began four and a half years ago to bring focus and assistance to the special needs community while also
FLICKR CREATIVE COMMONS
Bringing in a Major League Soccer team has long been a collective San Antonio aspiration. And though it’s still a ways off, fans feel that a deal announced last week means the dream is closer than ever. Here’s the plan: The City of San Antonio and Bexar County will purchase Toyota Field from San Antonio Scorpions owner Gordon Hartman for $18 million, with Spurs Sports and Entertainment chipping in another $3 million. The city and county will then lease the stadium to Spurs Sports and Entertainment for 20 years. The group has six years to procure an MLS team to own and operate, otherwise it must pay the city and county $2.5 million each. High-level soccer is a good fit for San Antonio’s demographics, and would likely draw soccer fans from Central and South Texas. It could strengthen ties to Mexico by bringing over teams from its professional ranks for exhibition games. “Fans may have to wait a few more years, but soccer has an international appeal and is a perfect fit for our city’s global outlook and economic strategy,” Mayor Ivy Taylor said during a press conference. For fans like James Hope, president of the Crocketteers, a San Antonio soccer supporters group, the waiting game is nothing new. Hope’s lobbied to bring MLS to San Antonio for over a decade. “Our goal has been to bring the highest level of professional soccer to San Antonio,” Hope said. “It’s a dream come true for those of us who have been working on this.” But Hope also realizes there’s still a long way to go before the MLS officially comes to town, with no definite timeframe of when that might happen. MLS will likely add franchises in Miami, the Minneapolis/St. Paul area, Los Angeles and Atlanta by the end of the decade, bringing its total number of teams to 24. But it won’t stop there, according to Don Garber, the league’s commissioner. “We’ve got to come together and
The Competition
San Antonio isn’t the only city pushing for an MLS franchise. Here are some other possible big-league soccer cities:
delivering high-quality professional soccer. We look forward to reviewing the final details of the agreement ... to ensure that it continues to advance those dreams,” Hartman said. While Hope and other supporters are appreciative of Hartman’s efforts, their main concern now is sprinting toward the big bright lights of MLS. “Without Gordon Hartman there would be no chance for MLS in San Antonio,” Hope said. “We want to make sure that the Spurs are ready to make the next step. We don’t want to see minor league soccer in San Antonio anymore, we want to see Major League Soccer.” mmarks@sacurrent.com
Sacramento // Perhaps San Antonio’s biggest rival, California’s capital has a thriving minor league team and a plan to privately finance a new downtown stadium. St. Louis // The Gateway City has long sought an MLS team, but has lacked the infrastructure for one. A new stadium designed to keep the NFL’s St. Louis Rams in town could accommodate a soccer team as well. Austin // Our neighbors to the north are currently home to the Austin Aztex, a minor league club. But MLS Commissioner Don Garber has listed Austin as a possible destination for expansion.
B:10.18 in
T:10.18 in
sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 13
S:9.68 in
© 2015 Goose Island Beer Company, Chicago, IL. Enjoy responsibly. Great American Beer Festival® Awards (Category: English Style India Pale Ale): 2012 Gold (India Pale Ale), 2009 Silver (IPA), 2007 Silver (India Pale Ale), 2004 Silver (Goose Island India Pale Ale), 2001 Bronze (India Pale Ale), 2000 Gold (Goose Island IPA).
B:10.25 in T:10.25 in S:9.75 in
CALENDAR
WED
11
Keep Shelly in Athens MUSIC
One of the many chillwave bands introduced to the blogosphere by the millennial tastemakers at the longrespected blog Gorilla vs. Bear, Keep Shelly in Athens is a prolific two-piece from Athens, Greece. Grounded by the delicate bump-and-murk production of RΠЯ, the act’s human element, singer Myrtha, adds ethereal vocals. Keep Shelly in Athens’ latest album Now I’m Ready, which will no doubt be the focus of Wednesday’s set, finds the group plumbing familiar territory, spinning wobbly jams with glowing edges. This is club music that you can sleep to, and it’s kind of wonderful. $5-$10, 8pm, Limelight, 2718 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 735-7775, thelimelightsa.com. — James Courtney
THU
12
Blackheart Burlesque SPECIAL EVENT
Launched as an online platform for indie pin-ups to post photos, videos and profiles, SuicideGirls is now an empire encompassing DVDs, games, books, comics and a touring burlesque show. Likened to a “comic con meets burlesque nerd orgy,” their Blackheart Burlesque spikes the classic tease with pop-culture references ranging from Star Wars and The Legend of Zelda to A Clockwork Orange and Fifty Shades of Grey. But it’s not all dweeb fluff: The ladies teamed up with revered choreographer Manwe Sauls-Addison (who’s worked with both Beyoncé and J. Lo) to pack a tight punch into each performance. $25-$125, 8pm, Alamo City Music Hall, 1305 E. Houston St., alamocitymusichall.com. — Murphi Cook
14 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 2015 • sacurrent.com
THU
12
Rant. Chant. Chisme. WORDS
Amalia Ortiz is a Tejana poet, actress, playwright and activist whose work, as politically charged as it is personal, is rooted in spoken-word performance. A three-season alumna of Russell Simmons Presents Def Poetry, Ortiz has a knack for tackling complex issues with fierce and direct language that never shies away from its mission to deliver a dose of reality to readers. Her debut collection of poetry, Rant. Chant. Chisme. (Wings Press), was released this year to widespread acclaim. Thursday, hear her read from that collection and take questions about her craft. Free (donations appreciated), 6-8pm, The Movement Gallery/Underground Library, 1412 E. Commerce St., (210) 299-2666. — JC
FRI
13
‘Plato’s Drums’ ART + MUSIC
After severe weather cut this year’s Luminaria down to a sole sloshy night, the multimedia arts festival is presenting rescheduled events under the umbrella of “Take Two” programming. Named in reference to Plato’s ominous “Allegory of the Cave,” “Plato’s Drums” pairs indie-rockers Buttercup with contemporary artist Chris Sauter for a conceptual concert experience. Staged in a vacant lot, the project entails a sculptural replica of the band’s drum set (rebuilt by Sauter after rain and wind destroyed the original), video projections and songs about “misinterpretation, blindness, the ego and drumming.” Free, 7-9pm, 1101 Broadway, (210) 721-1670, luminariasa.org. — Bryan Rindfuss
CALENDAR
FRI
13
Selena Sing-along FILM
If I were mayor, I’d require all bars to do a “Dreaming of You” sing-along at last call and a MAC lipstick goodbye kiss to all those boozy strangers. But the Guadalupe’s Selena biopic singalong is the next best option. Starring Jennifer Lopez as the tejano icon, the role rocketed Jenny from the block and toward a superstardom that Selena herself didn’t get the opportunity to enjoy. The movie is good — not Amor Prohibido material, but still pretty good. But its soundtrack, filled with live recordings from Selena herself, is what made us want to sing-along in the first place. Free with RSVP, 7:30pm, Guadalupe Theater, 1301 Guadalupe St., (210) 271-3151, guadalupeculturalarts.org. — Matt Stieb
FRI-SAT
13-14
Musica en la Calle SPECIAL EVENT
More than a mere block party, Hotel Havana’s Musica en la Calle bills itself as a “cultural communitydriven event sharing what it is that makes San Antonio so unique.” Presented in partnership with Transmission Events, the third annual affair is set to pack the hotel’s parking lot with eclectic sounds, vendors, food and drinks. Musical highlights of the two-day happening include Friday performances by cosmic big band Golden Dawn Arkestra and “Austin’s Queen of Soul” Tameca Jones (pictured), followed on Saturday by bilingual singer-songwriter Gina Chavez and global fusion ensemble Cilantro Boombox. Free, 7-11pm Fri-Sat, Hotel Havana, 1015 Navarro St., (210) 2222008, havanasanantonio.com. — BR
SAT
14
Robert Johnson Sessions MUSIC
The flagship event of the San Antonio Blues Society, the Robert Johnson Sessions celebrates the Mississippi guitarist’s November 1936 recording in Room 414 of the Gunter Hotel. Tinny and brilliant, the SA recordings are one of two collections we have of the Faustian master of the Delta blues. For the 79th anniversary, the Blues Society invites Guy Davis (pictured) to open Johnson’s songbook. The son of actors Ruby Dee (A Raisin in the Sun) and Ossie Davis (Do the Right Thing), Guy Davis’ earthy slide and washboard cry make for a knockout one-two combo. With Guy Forsyth. $15-$50, 8:30pm, Sam’s Burger Joint, 330 E. Grayson St., (210) 223-2830, samsburgerjoint.com. — MS
SAT-SUN
14-15
BobFest
SPECIAL EVENT
This weekend, get set to throw a Jamaican-influenced chill at BobFest (formerly the Bob Marley Festival Tour), which is back in Saytown after a six-year hiatus. In the lush environs of Sunken Garden, patchouliscented festival-goers will experience live music of the reggae, dancehall and dub variety, as well as a costume contest, an international cook-off, a limbo contest (WTF?) and other seemingly mismatched gaieties. The family affair hasn’t released a full lineup yet, but musical contributors will include InDaSkies, Sullivan’s Vessel, Island Vibrations and Bad Chords, among others. $15-$20, 2-10pm Sat-Sun, Sunken Garden Theater, 3875 N. St. Mary’s St., bobfesttour.com. — JC
sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 15
CALENDAR
WED-SAT
THU
12
International Artists-In-Residence
For nearly 200 years, five generations of the Monticelli family of Ravenna, Italy, have entertained audiences worldwide as Teatro del Drago, seamlessly integrating puppetry, shadow theater, live actors and music to tell their classic tales. The group first brought its production of Pinocchio to Trinity University in 2013, and now — courtesy of AtticRep — they return with an encore of this magical retelling of the fairytale about a wooden puppet who dreams of becoming a real boy. And they won’t stop there: Teatro del Drago will also transform the stage at Magik Theatre (420 S. Alamo St.) for a limited run of another piece, The Rescue of Prince Carlo, on November 12 and 13. $18-$28, 8pm Wed-Sat, 2:30pm Sun, Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624, atticrep.org. — Murphi Cook
Creative minds from the distinct art capitals of London, New York and Marfa converge in the final installment of Artpace’s 2015 International-Artists-In-Residence cycle. Hand-picked by NY-based Cecilia Alemani, whose curatorial credits include Frieze Projects and High Line Art, artists Cally Spooner (London), Marie Lorenz (New York) and Larry Bamburg (Marfa) have been living and working under one roof since September 14. Given the creative freedom and experimentation Artpace inspires, all bets are off in terms of what the trio has concocted with the institution’s “unparalleled resources.” What we do know: Spooner has penned “plotless novellas” and satirizes such pop-culture mainstays as Beyoncé and Justin Bieber; Lorenz draws inspiration from urban waterways, works with found objects and operates a water taxi; and Bamburg builds peculiar — and at times humorous — arrangements from such unlikely materials as animal bones, electrical wire and skateboard wheels. Free, 6-9pm, Artpace, 445 N. Main Ave., (210) 212-4900, artpace.org. — Bryan Rindfuss
Art
Theater
Art opening: “Concrete: An Urban Photography Exhibit” Part of the
Contents Under Pressure: Urban Life Festival, this exhibit presents landscapes, portraits and graffiti projects through the lenses of some of Texas’ finest street photographers. Free, 2pm Saturday; The Paint Yard, 525 San Pedro Ave., (210) 229-1707.
Art opening: “Exquisite Art Show” The
Jackson Ranch celebrates the work of artists/musicians Patricia Vonne, Rosie Flores and Armando Sanchez with a reception featuring live performances and special guest Michael Martin. Free, 2-7pm Sunday; The Jackson Ranch, 8910 Callaghan Road, (210) 344-8910.
Art opening: “Sepsis” Gallista Gallery hosts a Second Saturday reception featuring the work of abstract painter Juan Farias and live music by Los Indiginauts. Free, 6:309pm Saturday; Gallista Gallery, 107 Lone Star Blvd., (210) 212-8606.
Art opening: “Rounded Mass to be Swallwed Whole” Enigmatic,
unpredictable and accomplished are but a few of the words that come to mind when considering Jesse Amado, a San Antonio artist who’s represented in collections stretching from the McNay to the Smithsonian. A former firefighter, Amado’s been known to turn everything from dangling crystals to yards of fringe into conceptual works exploring themes of seduction, beauty and romance. Amado’s recent works employ richly colored virgin wool felt cuttings to address “the gamut of ways that pharmaceuticals inflect our daily lives.” On Second Saturday, Bill FitzGibbons’ Dock Space Gallery unveils Amado’s tellingly
titled “Rounded Mass to be Swallwed Whole.” Free, 7-10pm Saturday; Dock Space Gallery, 107 Lone Star Blvd.
Art opening: “Muse” Rafael Gutierrez
curates new works by artists Sarah Fox, Soomin Jung, Maritza Blu and Brittany Ham. Free, 6-8pm Thursday; UTSA Downtown Art Gallery, 501 W. Cesar Chavez Blvd., (210) 458-4983.
Art Party: 28 Chinese The November
installment of SAMA and KRTU’s collaborative Art Party series combines docent-led talks about the traveling exhibition “28 Chinese” (5:30pm and 6:15pm), specialty cocktails crafted by Blue Box (cash bar), art-making activities and live music by Melodious Phunk. $5-$20, 5:308pm Friday; San Antonio Museum of Art, 200 W. Jones Ave., (210) 978-8100.
McNay Second Thursdays The McNay’s
family-friendly monthly event series continues with another evening combining docent-led tours of the collection (6pm and 8pm), live local music, grub for purchase from area food trucks and beer courtesy of Crispin Ciders. Free, 6-9pm Thursday; McNay Art Museum, 6000 N. New Braunfels Ave., (210) 824-5368.
Film
Italian Movie Night: Cinema Paradiso
Christopher Columbus Italian Society hosts a screening of director Giuseppe Tornatore’s 1988 Oscar winner surrounding a young boy’s lifelong love affair with the movies. The event includes beer, wine and snacks, plus a commentary by UTSA professor Robert M. Baron. Free, 6:30-9:30pm Thursday; Columbus Hall, 201 Piazza Italia, (210) 223-8284.
16 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 2015 • sacurrent.com
A Ship of Fools: An Alibiography Local
playwright Gregg Barrios’ new work about Texas writer Katherine Anne Porter premieres at the Overtime via a staged reading directed by Marisela Barrera and featuring actors Gloria Sanchez and Joel Settles. $10, 7:30pm Saturday-Sunday; The Overtime Theater, 1203 Camden St., (210) 557-7562.
Bad Jews Mark McCarver directs the Vex’s
production of Joshua Harmon’s lacerating comedy Bad Jews. Summed up by The Hollywood Reporter as “a family fight of biblical proportions that brims with bile and belly laughs,” the play concerns a trio of 20-somethings brawling in the wake of their grandfather’s death. $16-$22, 7:30pm Thursday, 8pm Saturday; Sheldon Vexler Theatre, 12500 NW Military Hwy., (210) 302-6835.
Gashlycrumb Orphanage Tim Burton
meets Edward Gorey in this immersive theatrical experience combining a range of storytelling styles (including dance, toy theater and original music) brought to life onstage by Chicago-based theater artists Scott Ray Merchant and Michele Stine’s collaborative A.O. (American Odyssey) The Traveling Trunk Show. $8, 8pm Thursday, 8pm & 10:30pm Friday, 10:30pm Saturday; The Overtime Theater, 1203 Camden St., (210) 557-7562.
Medea For lovers of classical theater and the morbidly curious alike, The Classic Theatre presents the truly twisted yet strangely empowering Medea. Written by Euripedes, the Greek tragedy centers on the myth of Medea and Jason, wherein the former, scorned by the latter, exacts revenge by
murdering her own children and “the other woman.” $10-$25, 8pm Friday-Saturday, 3pm Sunday; Classic Theatre of San Antonio, 1924 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 589-8450.
Night Watch The mystery thickens when
a sleepless Elaine Wheeler believes she sees a dead body from the window of her Manhattan townhouse. However, police only find an empty chair. The play’s suspense deepens as it reaches a riveting and chilling climax. $5-$8, 7:30 pm Fridays, Saturdays; Northwest Lakeview College, 1201 Kitty Hawk Rd., (210) 486-5624.
Out of Silence: Abortion Stories
Confronting the cacophony of polarizing political rhetoric surrounding abortion, Out of Silence asks the viewer to instead listen to the voices of women while exploring the situations, relationships, emotions and logistics that contextualize their decisions to seek abortion care. Presented by the Texas Freedom Network at Trinity University, this performance is part of the Week of Action for Illuminate RJ, an artivism campaign that seeks to bring stories surrounding abortion and reproductive justice to light. Free, 6:308:30pm Monday; Coates University Center Fiesta Room, One Trinity Pl., (210) 683-8212.
The Phantom of the Opera Based on
the classic novel Le Fantôme de l’Opéra by Gaston Leroux, The Phantom of the Opera follows a disfigured musical genius who haunts a Paris opera house and obsesses over a beautiful Soprano named Christine. It’s been 27 years since Andrew Lloyd Webber first unleashed this iconic half-masked phantom onto Broadway audiences, and now — more than 10,000 shows later — Cameron Mackintosh
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Bruce Bruce A onetime spokesman for
Popeye’s Chicken & Biscuits and host of BET’s ComicView, Atlanta-based stand-up Bruce Bruce (Losin’ It, Top Five, Think Like a Man) prides himself on not using vulgarity to win a laugh. $22.50, 8pm & 10:15pm Friday-Saturday, 8pm Sunday; Laugh Out Loud Comedy Club, 618 NW Loop 410, (210) 541-8805.
Special Events
Content Under Pressure: Urban Life Festival Centered around live
painting, the Content Under Pressure: Urban Life Festival aims to “bring local and international artists of all genres together in a live exchange and exposition of creativity.” Hosted by The Paint Yard, the three-day fest unites more than 60 aerosol stylists from around the globe as well as vendors, turntablists and emcees. For times and details, visit tpy-urbanblog.com. Free, Friday-Sunday, The Paint Yard, 525 San Pedro Ave., (210) 229-1707.
River City Wrestling Fan Appreciation Night Eight lucky fans can win chances
to stand ringside armed with leather belts at this RCW tradition with a “Lumberjack Strap Match” between “Super-Mex” Hernandez and Brandon Groom and a steel cage match between RCW owner Brandon Oliver and RCW champion Skitzkrieg. $10, 8pm Friday; Retama Park Race Track, One Retama Pkwy., Selma, (210) 651-7000.
Rock and Ride on the Plaza Joyride
Cycling Studio pops up on the Tobin’s River Walk Plaza for a free class set to thumping DJ beats. Free, 4-6pm Saturday; Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 228-0797.
Solar Fest 2015 Learn about energy
savings at the CPS Energy Village while also enjoying activities for the family, live music, cold beverages, the H-E-B Kid Zone and Artist Village. Festival-goers who arrive early can enter the Alamo Forest Partnership free tree-giveaway. Free, noon-6 pm, Saturday; Roosevelt Park, 331 Roosevelt Ave., (210) 224-7278.
Tellabration A feast of tales are in store
for listeners as eight local and nationally known storytellers spin yarns from a range of cultures. This annual event is celebrated all across the globe and is
Veterans Day Celebration Lt. Col.
Richard Cole, co-pilot during the infamous Doolittle raid, and former SA mayor Phil Hardberger, an Air Force veteran, take to the skies along with other Alamo City veterans in “dream flights” (provided by the nonprofit Ageless Aviation Dreams Foundation) at this celebration featuring displays of vintage military aircraft. Free, 9am-2pm Wednesday; Stinson Municipal Airport, 8535 Mission Road, (210) 207-1800.
Dance
Algoritmos Arte y Pasión in conjunction
with The Uptown Studio presents Algoritmos, a project juxtaposing flamenco with modern movement and fine art. Under the artistic direction of Tamara Adira, the production features dancers Stephan Gaeth and Rochelle Banuet, opera singer Rachel Latremore and musicians Ciro, Luke Bonecutter and Darian Thomas. $10-$50, 7pm Friday; The Uptown Studio, 700 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 387-1617.
Global Hafla for Humanity Kata Maya
Bellydance, in association with the IRC (International Rescue Committee), presents a night of dancing and live Middle Eastern music with proceeds benefiting Syrian Refugees. $10, 7-10pm Saturday; Missy Miller Presents, 15717 San Pedro Ave., (210) 920-5282.
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Antonio Symphony, the USAF’s Dimensions in Blue Jazz Ensemble and Fort Sam’s own Biohazard Brass Band join forces for this 11th annual Salute to Service featuring Tchaikovsky’s “1812 Overture” as well as the music of John Williams and Glenn Miller. Free, 7pm Wednesday; Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624.
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Veterans Day: Salute to Service The San
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Comedy
sponsored by the National Storytelling Network. $5-$10, 7-9 pm Saturday; Raindrop Turkish House, 4337 Vance Jackson Road, Suite 203, (210) 326-7877.
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reimagines the original staging and design for a new generation in one of the largest productions to tour North America. $39$154, 7:30pm Wednesday-Thursday, 8pm Friday, 2pm & 8pm Saturday, 2pm & 7:30pm Sunday; The Majestic Theatre, 224 E. Houston St., (210) 226-3333.
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hough we’d never advoca te comple tely scrapp ing a traditio nal alphab et in place of Unicod e’s emoji keyboard, we can admit the shorthand smileys and the miscell aneous genres they come in help capture situatio ns you can’t quite put into words. But while a quick thumbs up, goofy ghost, or wink-y face can convey plenty of universally understood messages (eggplant emoji, anyone?), be it through text or Snapchat, it’s hard to communicate the intricacies and nuance s of life in SA with the latest Unicode update. It needs a little Saytown flair — how else are you going to express Fiesta is but a few weeks away, or that the neighborhood pack of strays chased you on your way home? We’ve designed a new set of emojis to help describe San Antonio life with more ease. Don’t see something integral to the 210 experience? Feel free to let us know what we missed in the comment section at sacurrent.com.
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Big Red and Barbacoa When to use it: Anywhere! Anytime! ALL THE TIME!!! (Or, for the less puro reader, Saturday and/or Sunday morning when your head is splitting and you feel like you’re about to call the dinosaurs (ralph, upchuck, spew, vomup, etc.). To combat said spewage, Friday or Saturday evening is also an opportune time for this emoji. Stray Dog When to use it: The San Antonio Humane Society estimates that 150,000 stray animals wander the streets of the Alamo City. Employ this emoji when one canine member of that army decides to chase you on your bike for a few streets, causing detours and delays. Or, when an orphan dog does something oddly human, like looks both ways before crossing the street. Or, when you see an adorable pup roaming around that you just have to take in.
Ram Ayala When to use it: Punk icon, foulmouth and Taco Land owner Ram Ayala is gone and, in some ways, so is the San Antonio he occupied. When complaining about double-digit drink prices in the Pearl, when you’re about to do some punk-rock shit, when you pour several different liquors in the same bottle and call it “The Baby”, when you absolutely have to call someone a pussy, give the Ram finger. Topo Chico & Jarritos When to use it: The CDC reported this year that binge-drinking and hangovers cost companies about $807 per employee. It’s no stretch to say that the entire San Anto
ARTS + CULTURE
economy would collapse if not for the bubbly kiss of Topo Chico, the ultimate resaca cure. In a rainbow of flavors, Jarritos makes for a lovely taco pairing. From guava to tamarind, drink it over plenty of ice. Use it when you’re hungover and need some Topo relief. Use it when you crave a too-sweet pineapple Jarritos with that al pastor. Use it when there’s a fresh pack in the fridge and all is right in the world. Selena When to use it: Every fucking day. We know the tejano queen is from Corpus Christi. But Selena is woven into San Antonio’s cultural fabric so intricately that if we took her out, the whole civic operation might fall apart. Get Selena into the text chain for those annual viewings of the biopic, which launched J. Lo’s career. Or, when you’re rolling through the neighborhood with the windows down flexing to “Amor Prohibido.” Ultimately, the catchphrase from the movie applies to the emoji’s use: “Anything for Selenas.” Lone Star Can When to use it: A staple of happy hours all over town, the 16-ounce can of cheap beer is ubiquitous in the Alamo City. From backyard barbecues to watching the Spurs (hopefully) steamroll their way through the season, this emoji will come in handy for all those parties,
concerts and sporting events that San Antonians hold dear. Spurs "Fiesta" Logo When to use it: Used by the San Antonio Spurs from 1990 to 2002, the tricolored logo bid farewell to superstar David “The Admiral” Robinson and ushered in the era of the phenomenal Virgin Islander Tim Duncan. Its usage is a natural one, anytime there is anything Spurs-related use this throwback logo to show how true your love for one of the NBA’s greatest-ever teams is. River Barge When to use it: With the additions of the Mission Reach and Museum Reach, locals can play on the river while avoiding a touristsaturated River Walk. However, when family or friends who have never enjoyed the San Antonio River as it snakes through downtown visit, a ride on a barge manned by Rio San Antonio Cruises is typically on the to-do list. Use this emoji for anything River Walk-related. Tower of the Americas When to use it: Built for the ’68 World’s Fair, the Tower of the Americas defines San Antonio’s skyline. It’s the tallest building in the city (the 27th tallest in Texas) and is synonymous with downtown. Use this emoji to express a trip to the
revamped Hemisfair Park, or really, for any trip to downtown SA Or, if you’re more cynical, use this emoji when you’re trapped in an elevator. Cedar When to use it: You know exactly when to use this one — nearly every damn day during cedar season. Central Texas’ “cedar fever” is as regular as heat is normal. Nearly everyone suffers, from itchy and scratchy eyes to an ever-flowing amount of nosegoo that costs you an exorbitant amount in tissue expenses each year. There is no escape from this fine yellow pollen, so anytime you need to communicate how much allergies suck via an emoji (because you can’t talk through the sneezing), this one’s for you. Davy Crockett Coonskin Cap When to use it: There is no modern equivalent to Davy Crockett. The myths surrounding the “King of the Wild Frontier” could not be concocted today. A bear-fightin’, gator-wrasslin’, hard-livin’ sumbitch, Crockett is best-known around these parts for fighting and dying during the siege of the Alamo. As for the cap? Crockett’s daughter Matilda recalled her father wearing it the last time she saw him, before he rode off to Texas. You probably won’t reach the hyperbolic heights that Crockett did. But you can try. And when you do, the coonskin cap emoji is the one you’ll want to use. sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 21
ARTS + CULTURE
The Castro Twins When to use it: A quick and easy shorthand for San Antonio’s most powerful twins. Both Congressman Joaquin and Housing and Urban Development Secretary Julián are rumored to be vice presidential candidates for Hillary Clinton. If it happens, you’ll need this emoji. If it doesn’t happen, you’ll still need this emoji — because these guys aren’t going anywhere anytime soon. Also a polite way to indicate that twins are creepy. The Alamo When to use it: We live in the Alamo City — use it whenever you want. There is no inappropriate time for the Alamo emoji; the question is only how many Alamo emojis to use. Spurs win? Alamo emoji. Your car breaks down? Alamo emoji. Wanna get tacos? Alamo emoji. Ironically, since you probably only go to the Alamo when you have family visiting from out of town, you’re least likely to use the Alamo emoji when you’re actually visiting the Alamo. But it’s OK to use then, too. North Star Boots When to use it: These boots were made for shoppin’. Tap them into a text whenever you’re compelled to grab an Auntie Anne’s pretzel, get your eyebrows threaded, purchase a bright red Spurs hat at Lids, or relive your high school angst at Hot Topic. These 40-foot-high bipedal monuments represent everything there is to love and hate about going to the mall. Also utilize them when you are in desperate need of ostrich-skin boots (you just never know when they’ll come in handy).
only taco emoji currently available looks like a crispy taco. Variety isn’t only the spice of life, it’s the essence of tacos that aren’t restricted to crunchy shells. Send a few of these out come Saturday morning for either a mid-morning catch-up session or as a plea for taco delivery after a latenight out.
rolls around, bust out your sparkly flip flops (which often grow only more bedazzled as Fiesta grows near). Use it when you’re getting your toesies done or when you need a roach squashed. San Anto moms, use this as a warning that kids (and certain adults) should know to heed.
Paleta Cart When to use it: When summer (read: anytime the temperature goes over 80 degrees) strikes and you’re in need of a cool treat. Wave down the paleta man — there are still a handful of them left in Saytown — contemplate choosing between coconut, strawberry or chile-limón and go on your merry way.
Pink Concha When to use it: Baked fresh throughout plenty of bakeries around town, pan dulce conchas are making their way out of breakfast and midafternoon meriendas and into the burger game. The upcoming Con Safos at Yanaguana Garden will feature a burger sandwiched between a concha bun from Bedoy’s Bakery, while Old Main Assoc. serves up a concha burger of their own using pink buns from Folklor Bakery on Ingram Road. We like to keep it simple and dip our conchas in either coffee or Abuelita hot chocolate.
A Puffy Taco When to use it: When the craving for Ray’s Drive Inn, Henry’s Puffy Tacos or Los Barrios kicks in. When you’re feeling extra puro. When you’re enjoying a puffy taco and want to make your friends wildly jealous. Use it at the Missions game as you’re about to chase down Henry the Puffy Taco and need all the positive vibes you can get.
Pearl Stack When to use it: Whether you’re taking your pup on a walk through Museum Reach and ending at the Pearl, cruising the weekend farmers market with your stroller-strapped kiddo, or grabbing brunch at Boiler House, the Pearl stack now rivals the Friendship Torch, general downtown skyline and Quarry stacks for most iconic structure in SA. Use it when you’re heading down to Emma’s Larder, Supper or Sternewirth.
Breakfast Taco When to use it: Specifically carne guisada with cheese, and bacon and egg. It’s a damn shame the
La Chancla When to use it: Spring/summer lasts something like 11 months out of the year, so as sandal season
22 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 • sacurrent.com
Veladora When to use it: All day, every day? Got a big test coming up? Light a veladora. Got a job promotion on the line? Veladora. Spurs playing a big game against Cleveland and we need to make sure Manu stays healthy? Light a Manu-specific veladora designed by local artist Jamie Stolarski. At this point restaurants and bars far and wide are paying
ARTS + CULTURE
an ice-cold Dos Equis, Modelo Especial or almost any other Mexican cerveza — the salty/sour combo delivers a margarita-like sensation that’s equally suited for barbecues and bar crawls. Use this emoji anytime you’re ready to kick back with pals (day or night, we won’t judge) or when a few cold ones is the best answer to the day’s problems. Also: pairs well with ice house emoji.
homage to their Mexican roots by lighting a few (dozen) veladoras to add an authentic feel. Buy them in bulk, funnily enough, at Target. Ice House When to use it: When even the idea of another mezcal-rinsed, blasphemously bittered tiki-jito with a chicken liver garnish and paprika-powdered rim makes you want to puke from the audacity rather than abundance, or you’re just tired of waiting for your bartender to climb down from the fourth floor of the bar’s liquor shelf, take a cold one in at your local ice house. Donkey Lady When to use it: Possibly the spirit of a woman freakishly disfigured in a fire, the anthropomorphic Donkey Lady has allegedly been haunting a South Side bridge for generations. Thrill-seekers brave (or stoned) enough to stop there for a spell and call out her name report everything from hearing the clip-clop of hooves to full-on vehicular damage. Arguably SA’s quirkiest urban legend, the DL recently graced a rad BarbacoApparel T-shirt and
even had her own phone number back in the ’80s. Use this emoji when you feel like — or are dealing with — a vengeful ass in a dress or find yourself near Old Applewhite Road. Badass Raspa When to use it: In perennially hot San Antonio, frozen confections are always in season. Ampedup takes on the sno cones of yesteryear, some of the creations coming out of specialty spots (such as Las Nieves, Chamoy City Limits and Big Daddy’s Eats & Treats) turn shaved ice into an edible art form. A popular concoction, the mangonada or chamoyada varieties balance the fruity sweetness with a kick of chili powder and a sour punch of chamoy (a Mexican condiment made from pickled fruit). Use this emoji when an icy treat’s the only way to beat the heat. A "Dressed" Beer When to use it: Depending on your brew of choice, dressing up a bottle of beer with a spray of bar salt and a lime wedge (and maybe even a beverage napkin twisted into a little skirt) could be like putting lipstick on a pig. But when executed properly — on
George Strait, When to use it: Anytime is a good time for King George. When/where it will realistically be used: The wedding day of the one that got away, the day your significant other files for divorce, when your dog dies, when your dad falls off the wagon, when your mom falls off the wagon, when you fall off the wagon, when your partner leaves you for your best friend, at any gay bar that has access to George Strait (trust me), as the last dance of every grade school function or anytime you just wanna get crunk in a redneck sorta way and scoot them boots. Word to the wise: Stick to the upbeat jammers because alcohol and George Strait are a slippery, heart-breaking slope. Fiesta Medal/Cascaron When to use it: If your Fiesta medal addiction requires you to don a sash, you know that this San Anto-specific knick-knack is no joke. Use the emoji in advance of the Pindemonium at Alamo Plaza, or if you’re hoping to trade a medal with your fellow pinhead. Much like Pokemon, you’ve gotta catch ‘em all. The Big 3: Manu, Timmy & Tony When to use it: Whenever the greatest and most acrobatic sixth man in the game checks in, joining Timmy and Tony and completing the trifecta of skill, talent and inspiration that is the most-winning threesome in sports history; when Tony feeds to Manu who delivers to Timmy within a hair’s breadth of an opposing defender’s outstretched mitt and The Big Fundamental finishes, demonstratively; when we take home our sixth NBA title and hoist that Larry O’Brien bling for all the world to bear witness to the greatest trio of ballers … ever. sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 23
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EXHIBITION ORGANIZED BY THE SEATTLE ART MUSEUM AND THE MUSEO NACIONAL CENTRO DE ARTE REINA SOFÍA. THIS EXHIBITION IS SUPPORTED BY AN INDEMNITY FROM THE FEDERAL COUNCIL ON THE ARTS AND THE HUMANITIES. JOAN MIRÓ, FIGURE AND BIRD, 1968. LOST-WAX CASTING, PATINATED BRONZE. NACIONAL CENTRO DE ARTE REINA SOFÍA. © SUCCESSIÓ MIRÓ / ARTISTS RIGHTS SOCIETY (ARS), NEW YORK / ADAGP, PARIS 2015.
28 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 • sacurrent.com
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LIGHTING UP LA VILLITA
Diwali looks to shine in original location MARK REAGAN/@210REAGAN
Founded in 1640, nearly 100 years before the Alamo City, with more than triple the amount of residents, San Anto will celebrate its relationship with one of its nine sister cities — Chennai, India — with Diwali San Antonio Festival of Lights. The celebration returns to La Villita — where the inaugural festival took place — on Saturday as thousands of festival-goers descend into the historic River Walk enclave to celebrate both the Hindu new year and the victory of good over evil. Shahrzad Dowlatshahi, chief of protocol for the San Antonio Intergovernmental Relations Department, says the festival started in SA in 2009 under former Mayor Phil Hardberger’s leadership to commemorate the sister-city relationship with the capitol city of Tamil Nadu — a state in southeastern India that’s next to the Bay of Bengal. “The local group that works in benefit of our sistercity relationship here in the community consists of a very, very active group of volunteers and created an organization called Anuja SA,” Dowlatshahi said. “They were tasked by Mayor [Phil] Hardberger to help share the culture of India with our community, with our citizens. And as part of bringing Indian culture to our community on an annual level, he encouraged them to organize an annual Diwali festival of lights that the city will sponsor.” The result has been a wildly successful event that has grown exponentially over the years. In fact, COSA bills it as the largest city-sanctioned Diwali celebration in the entire country. But with success comes growing pains. Kausi Subramaniam, president of the nonprofit Anuja SA, said in just that first year, when organizers thought about 1,000 people would show up, so many festivalgoers came out that there wasn’t enough space. This year, Subramaniam said organizers are preparing for between 15,000 and 20,000 people. “We’re getting calls from all over the U.S. and as far as Ireland,” she says, explaining that an Irish couple was planning a trip to Texas and decided to plan it around Diwali. After the first year, Diwali moved to Hemisfair Park where it was held four times before moving to Alamo Plaza last year because of construction. Traditionally, Diwali closes the night with a fireworks display, but it had to throw a laser show at the Alamo Plaza because fireworks weren’t allowed. There also wasn’t an enough space for
THE MORE YOU KNOW - Founded in 1640 - 6.4 million people live there - The city used to be named Madras, which may originate from a fishing village called Madrasapattinam - It’s known as the “Gateway to South India” - It’s also called the “Detroit of India” as 40-percent of the country’s auto parts and vehicles are made there
- Chennai’s Anna Centenary Library is the largest library in Asia - The city’s Vandalur Zoo was established in 1855, making it the first public zoo in India, as well as being the largest one in the country SOURCE: Chennai.org.uk
food vendors from all regions of India, and they’ll be in the estimated 15,000 people who showed up. Maverick Plaza.” “We are looking to La Villita as preferably the new A DJ will be playing Bollywood music, along with pop home for the festival,” Dowlatshahi says. tunes from the world’s seventh largest country in Plaza Subramaniam said Diwali San Antonio Festival of Flores, where there will also be Bollywood Zumba. Lights will be jam-packed with activities this year in its “And we will have our diya release ceremony. And new space. those are basically floating candles released in front There will be a “Parade of States” where people will dress in original attire from India’s 29 Diwali San Antonio of of the Arneson in front of the river,” Subramaniam says. “That’s a tradition in India. This is also the time states, and folk dances on the main stage, which Festival of Lights Free they release New Year candles into a river and wish will be at the intersection of Nueva and Alamo 5-11 pm Sat, Nov. 14 for a prosperous new year.” streets. La Villita Historic Arts Village There will also be other vendors selling arts “And on the Arneson stage, we have other 418 Villita St. and crafts. performances, primarily classical dance forms (210) 207-8100 from India,” Subramaniam said. “We have mreagan@sacurrent.com diwalisa.com sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 29
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ARTS + CULTURE
TRUTH AMONG THE LIES The surreal and grotesque fem-pop of Kira Leigh JAMES COURTNEY
Boston’s Kira Leigh, or “the gross Kira” as her website puts it, is a visual artist whose compelling and bright works are, at once, universal critiques and deeply personal battles waged in vibrant color. Leigh is a feminist who fights the patriarchy in an emotive manner by turning inward and depicting her own anxieties and struggles on (mostly) paper with non-traditional implements (markers, nail polish, gel pens, highlighter and more). Her work challenges the male-dominated status quo by abstractly visualizing the damage it has wrought upon her own psyche. Last week, the San Antonio Current caught up with Leigh to discuss her concerns, her processes and her upcoming solo exhibit at K23 Gallery. Here are some highlights of that chat. On her stream of consciousness style: During my career in college I kept a sketchbook of these strange, surreal female figures, complicated and grotesque. Then I was approached by my professor when he saw them, and he told me I needed to make that my focus, not these traditional oil portraits I was making. I was hell-bent on realism, but these [drawings] had just sprung out of me. I knew then that this was what I was put on this earth to do; to draw images from the soul, from emotions and feelings, responding to color and shape.
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for yourself if they are worth your time and effort. Art is worth my time, but by going over, under and through traditional practices I aim to challenge what is static and make it dynamic.
On the feminist perspective in her art: I believe that my work challenges the idea that women need to be a certain way to be sexual. Not sexy, sexual. I think that we spend so much time plucking, grooming, obsessing about body image, weight, acne and so on that we forget we are females and not dolls. I think [my art] sends a very clear message that women can and will be ugly and that’s fine, and we can own our bodies and all of our flaws. I also On her use of non-traditional make these pieces based on emotional materials: states, and sometimes things like I see no point in abiding by the rules or anxiety are not pretty. The social standards concerning, for work as a whole is an attempt example, gender and sexuality. Cunt Culture: So it wouldn’t be any different Works by Kira Leigh to produce the truth among the lies we are told on a daily Free for me to nix the rules in terms 7pm Fri, Nov. 13 basis about how we should of how I create artwork. I think K23 Gallery feel, react, look and what we it’s important to challenge any 702 Fredericksburg Road should say. and all institutions and find out (210) 776-5635
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SCREENS
GOBLIN
The band behind the butchery JAMES WOODARD
Goblin is the soundtrack to your childhood nightmares. In the days before digital streaming services cherry-picked and homogenized what we “choose” to watch on Friday and Saturday nights, mystical places known as “video rental stores” dotted the landscape of ’80s and ’90s suburban America. These wondrous strip-mall staples were a congregation place for all color and creed; and for the weird kids, there was no more alluring, mysterious and wondrous a place as the horror section of your neighborhood Hollywood or Blockbuster Video. After scouring the aisles of tapes with the weirdest, most shocking covers to spend your weekend with, you were bound to come across a few of the handful of underground classics scored by Goblin, the legendary ’70s Italian prog-rock band. Their sound ranges wildly from pure gloom — organ swells, creepy chanting and sparse drumming — to totally funky prog-fusion with a rhythm section rivaling Stevie Wonders’. Their sound was instrumental in sculpting the aesthetics of many vital horror films of the era, which were most often directed (or at least produced) by Italian horror master, Dario Argento. The band’s first foray into horror scores began with Argento’s Profondo Rosso (Deep Red). Deep Red is a marvelously bloody slasher/mystery flick (a subgenre known as Giallo films, which was wildly popular at the time in Argento’s native Italy) about a jazz pianist who witnesses the merciless killing of a famous psychic and must team up with a goofybut-adorable journalist sidekick to solve the mystery before he ends up in a Technicolor bloodbath of his own. The film starts with, and is heavily punctuated by, Goblin’s score; the creepy staccato arpeggios of the main theme frequently reprise throughout the story. Each murder scene is intensified tenfold with Goblin’s manic, recurring chase theme. While a synopsis of the plot may seem quaint, the pacing isn’t as manic as modern slashers, and the film may not be as shocking as it once was, Argento’s surreal, awe-inspiring cinematography and Goblin’s haunting score make Deep Red a must-watch for fans of the slasher and murder mystery genres. Goblin’s second collaboration with Argento, 1978’s Suspiria, is a visual bloodfeast of a slasher flick. Suspiria is the story of an American ballet dancer studying at a German conservatory, where she (surprise) unravels the mystery of a string of murders occurring in and around the school, which reveals the faculty and staff to be a coven of 32 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 • sacurrent.com
witches. While most horror films tend to paint with a drab brush, Suspiria constantly blasts the viewer with deep, shocking, prismatic hues. Blood on the big screen has never been redder. In fact, Suspiria was one of the last films ever shot in Technicolor. It’s horror surrealism at its peak. The emphasis on extreme colorization, anamorphic lenses, one-point perspective and Goblin’s harmonic chiaroscuro coalesce into a masterpiece of the genre. Goblin’s score is filled with unrelenting dread, panic and terror, and Suspiria contains one of Goblin’s most iconic pieces of music. Suspiria is the 2001: A Space Odyssey of Italian Horror, and Goblin is its Ligeti. Arguably, the most well-known film scored by Goblin is George A. Romero’s 1978 masterpiece, Dawn of the Dead. Known in Europe as Zombi, Dawn of the Dead took the now well-tread subgenre of the zombie survival flick (essentially created by Romero himself a decade before in 1968’s Night of the Living Dead) and gave the viewer a sense of scale of how widespread and dire an undead pandemic can be. Dawn of the Dead was a collaborative production between Romero and Argento; Romero was responsible for the film’s cut for English-language regions, but Argento had the rights to edit the film for international foreignlanguage releases. Because of these liberties, Argento again enlisted Goblin for the score. While the Argento cut was scored completely by Goblin, the Romero cut only features four or so tracks by the band, and the rest is stock music (but you can’t forget Herbert Chappell’s “The Gonk” even if you want to). While the U.S. version is good in its own right (it’s still one of the best zombie flicks ever, no matter which edit you watch), the Argento cut with Goblin’s music just nails the hopeless cabin-fever atmosphere perfectly. After Dawn of the Dead, Goblin went through some inner-band turmoil, but main members, most notably Claudio Simonetti, went on to do a handful more soundtracks for Argento, including 1985’s Demons and 1986’s Phenomena, starring a preLabyrinth Jennifer Connelly. In recent years, members of the band (including main-man Simonetti) have reunited and toured Europe, the US, Japan and Australia extensively, and have been writing and recording new music. Goblin will perform the Dawn of the Dead soundtrack in its entirety at 10:45 p.m., on Sunday November 15 at the Aztec Theatre (104 N. St. Mary’s St.) for the third annual Housecore Horror Festival.
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Deep Red
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Suspiria
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Dawn of the Dead
SCREENS
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Alexander Fehling as “Johann,” public prosecutor and Nazi hunter
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Nazi hunting and soul searching in Labyrinth of Lies D.T. BUFFKIN /@DTBUFFKIN
Giulio Ricciarelli’s Labyrinth of Lies commits the Hollywood faux pas that I hoped, perhaps ignorantly, a foreign film would avoid. Namely, that it inserts a tepid love story into a film about the Holocaust. I understand people really, desperately need some sort of metaphorical teddy bear to cuddle when the harsh reality of humanity’s brutality rears its ugly head, but it almost seems sacrilegious to throw in a love-line so flaccid and unnecessary. What the relationship between Johann (Alexander Fehling) and Marlene (Friederike Becht) does seek to illuminate is the truth of our mutual involvement in, not only the war that left an estimated 60 million corpses in its wake, but in all wars and atrocities. This point is delivered with a fair share of poignancy and passion. Johann is a promising young public prosecutor bent on finding out exactly who was a card-carrying, Hitler-Heil’ing, swastika-emblazoned Nazi, something that his colleagues would rather sweep under the rug for their children to perhaps trip over. He strives to bring to justice not only the sadistic torturers and cold-blooded murderers that ushered children into ovens but also the Eichmann-everyman of the Third Reich who, sitting idly by as millions of their
fellow citizens were led to the slaughter, are inherently complicit in the murder. He discovers what we all know, with a little close contemplation, to be true: that “all those who participated, who didn’t say ‘no,’ they are Auschwitz.” Johann must confront one of the most intimidating facts that citizens of any nation often have to confront: the shared entanglement of our parents in the shame of our nations and the guilt of our people — the sins of our fathers. Whether it is in a rice field in Vietnam, a market in Kabul, a communal square in China, a gulag in Siberia or a concentration camp in Poland, the harsh reality of warfare and the human condition is that the day-to-day perpetuation of business-as-usual makes us accomplices, to one extent or another, in the dark side of human existence. What Labyrinth of Lies seeks to extract from this truth is that “the only response to Auschwitz is to do the right thing yourself.”
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Labyrinth of Lies (R) Dir. Giulio Ricciarelli, writ. Elisabeth Bartel, Giulio Ricciarelli; feat. Alexander Fehling, André Szymanski, Friederike Becht Opens Fri, Nov. 13 at Santikos Bijou
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FOOD
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SOPHOMORE SLUMP? Viva Vegeria nails nachos, but needs work LAUREN W. MADRID
I want to like vegetarian restaurants. I really do. As an avid carnivore, I know I need to eat more plants and less dairy. So I really want to like vegetarian and vegan restaurants. But dammit, sometimes they just won’t let me. Viva Vegeria is the sister restaurant to Vegeria on Broadway. Located on the West Side, it’s not close to food snob locations like Alamo Heights or the Pearl. But it’s definitely a neighborhood favorite — people come all day on Saturdays for the brunch buffet or just to have a beer. And it is a place where Mexican favorites are remade to be healthier, more “plant forward.” Viva Vegeria is larger than the original on Broadway and is bringing healthier options to the area. On a recent weekend visit, I saw everyone from large families with small children to adults dining alone, all enjoying themselves. The local artwork and bright decor gave the whole place a funky feel, and it’s a nice place to while away an afternoon. Most of m y past encounters with vegan queso have been terrible (I’ve been known to tell vegan cheese to die in a fire). The texture and taste usually doesn’t come close to real cheese. But Viva Vegeria’s vegan queso is creamy, tangy, not at all gritty. It’s a little thinner than a cheese-based queso, but that’s more of a personal preference. The nachos, which come in a half or full order, are topped with quinoa, spinach and guacamole. I
expected to get a salad, judging by the ingredients. What I got was a wellbalanced plate of delicious nachos. The sprinkling of quinoa added a bit of texture and the spinach didn’t overwhelm the palate. I consider myself a nacho fanatic, and these could have passed for carnivore nachos. (Is there a higher nacho compliment than that?) The dishes were a bit of a rollercoaster after that. The Portobello mushroom tacos were a flavor letdown. The mushrooms were well-breaded and well-cooked. If they’d had a salsa or vinegary slaw, they would have satisfied my craving for fish tacos. But they came plain, just the mushrooms in a tortilla. Adding in the side salad (which comes with all entrees) helped, but shouldn’t a vegan Mexican restaurant have salsa on just about everything? Or have it available on the tables in syrup bottles? That might’ve helped the side of black beans, which supposedly had paprika and garlic in them but were invisible to my palate. The papas fritas arrived drenched in oil and absolutely flaccid. The garlic curry ketchup the papas fritas came with was intriguing, but with nothing to dip into it, the sauce was abandoned on the side of my plate. On a brighter note, the spinach enchiladas and sweet potato flautas were great and well-balanced. The enchilada filling was a little blah, but the crema sauce (made from sunflower seeds and queso) was the saving grace. The flauta filling was
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Yep, the nachos still hit the spot
tasty and a bit spicy due to the peppers inside. They weren’t fried very well though, and came a little oily and soggy. Still, I was happy to have the flavors. When I think of vegan and gluten-free desserts, my expectations are pretty low, but I had high hopes for Viva Vegeria’s desserts. If anyone knows how to make vegan desserts not terrible, it should be a vegan restaurant. The joint has a halfdozen cupcake flavors in rotation every day. I chose a blackberry cupcake with blackberry icing and a dollop of blackberry preserves in the center. I’m not sure if it was the addition of the preserves or the cupcakes in general, but this cupcake was so moist and cakey, it collapsed when grazed by a fork. It was so moist, I could have wrung it out. The preserves
were good, but there was simply too big of a dollop inside and the whole cupcake collapsed in on itself. And whatever they were using for a sweetener was too powerful — all I could taste was the sugars and very little of the blackberry. Did Viva Vegeria make it into my rotation of healthy-ish restaurants? For the nachos, yes. For a brunch buffet that doesn’t make me regret everything later, yes. For a casual place to drink and have some nibbles, maybe. But for a real meal? No. Viva Vegeria needs to work on their flavors in general, both amping them up and balancing them. I’m glad they’re bringing a different view on food, but when adding vegan fare to an otherwise meat-eating area, it should be a betterexecuted view.
Viva Vegeria 1422 Nogalitos St., (210) 465-9233 The Skinny: Viva Vegeria tries to win over the city’s West Side with vegan fare. For now, there are some wins and a few misses. Best Bets: Flautas and nachos. Good vegan queso? It can be true. Cost: $3.49-$12.49 apps; $6.99-$12.49 entrees Hours: 11am to 9pm Mon-Thu; 11am to 10pm Fri-Sat; closed Sundays
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I’m not really a cereal person. pour over and Chemex varities. I’ve There was a brief period in not really paid enough attention to the college when all I ate was Fruit coffee because I’ve been too busy Loops because I swore the colored stuffing my face with Cocoa Puffs. little o’s were differently flavored — no, If you’ve been hoping to nerd out with I wasn’t high — but, that was a slightly a bowl of Star Wars cereal at breakfast, rebellious phase where my biggest but don’t want to commit to buying indiscretion was eating extremely an entire box, JEC has you covered. sugary cereal. Who wouldn’t burn out The menu carries 35 varieties — for on cereal after that? now — and seven milks to choose from. But when a cereal bar opens in The options get a bit overwhelming your neck of the woods, you’ve got with the addition of syrup flavors — 11 to check it out. And for both my visits all together. But the cereal treat won’t Joseph E. Coffee has fit a very relaxed come cheap, and it really shouldn’t (if bill. Opened by brothers Isaac and bowls were cheap then you’d become Adrian Cummings, the shop sits cattya real cereal killer). At $2.50 for a corner from Southtown 101 on South small and $4 for a large bowl (and St. Mary’s Street. Though it gets the they do mean large), you’re allowed job done as far as décor goes — the multiple cereal choices. At 50 cents for brothers exhibit artwork by local artists milk, and another 50-75 cents for fruit on a revolving basis — the shop is and nut toppings, your bowl has the otherwise muted. potential to get pricy. When it comes to coffee, the Know your combinations of choice brothers are bagging their own beforehand or commit to the early signature blends (Opulence, a favorites. The Adrian, found on the breakfast blend; Majestic, their “not-so-secret menu,” mixes Fruit Loops Colombian roast and Black (my jam), Oops, All Berries Gold, their Italian roast) that are and strawberry milk with sliced roasted by a third party. Joseph Joseph E. Coffee strawberries. Now if I could 1111 S. St. Mary’s St. E. Coffee carries the regular only get them to start playing (210) 451-1822 line of coffee and espresso Saturday morning cartoons … facebook.com/ drinks, along with nitro brew, flavor@sacurrent.com josephecoffeesatx
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11/11 Southern Hemisphere Tasting Come and enjoy the varietals from the Southern Hemisphere.
11/18 Chardonnay Tasting Getting ready for Thanksgiving, we are offering a Chardonnay Tasting. Come enjoy these great wine and get some To-Go for the Holiday.
11/24 Pinot Noir tasting Gear up for Thanksgiving with a Pinot Noir Tasting. Come taste some great Pinot Noirs and grab some To-Go for the Holiday. Web: NectarSA.com @Nectarsat
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Alamo Beer is helping raise the barre.
Thursday, November 12 Latte Art: Thursday Night Throwdowns are back. This time, Rosella Coffee Co. will play host to baristas from across San Antonio and beyond in this latte art competition with Snake Hawk Press’ fun prints and a few kegs of Freetail Brewing’s La Muerta 2015. Rickshaw Stop will park out front with kebabs and samosas to soak in all the fun. $5 buy-in for participants, free for spectators; 6pm, 203 E. Jones Ave., Suite 101, (210) 277-8574, facebook.com/rosellacoffee.
1526 ROOSEVELT AVE • 210.532.4113 (Look for the green building.)
Friday, November 13 Beer + Ballet: The Ballet Conservatory of South Texas and Alamo Beer are hosting a night of unlimited craft beer, appetizers, live music and mingling to benefit BCSTX. The organization helps support scholarships and free ballet instruction for children in underserved communities. Food trucks will also be slinging additional snacks for purchase. $35 in advance, $45 day of event, 7-10pm, 202 Lamar St., (210) 820-3400, beerandballet.eventbrite.com.
HAPPY HOUR Mon - Fri: 4-7pm | Sun: 8-10 pm
Saturday, November 14 Brats, Brisket, Brews & Blues: Gustav’s Garden opens once more for a night of meats and beats. Stop in for fun appetizers, bratwurst, chopped brisket, pulled pork sandwiches and hot dogs along with German-style barbecue plates and all the fixins. Prices vary, 6-10pm, 10333 Huebner Road, (210) 496-0828, magnoliapancakehaus.com.
• 1/2 price apps and Guac! • $4 craft draughts • $3 off cocktails and wine • $6 Michelada all day everyday
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Tuesday, November 17 Vinyasa & Vino: Practice vinyasa yoga inside downtown’s latest wine haven. Nectar Wine Bar & Ale House will team up with Mobile Om for mindful movements and a glass of choice from their eclectic selection. $20, 5-7pm, 214 Broadway, (210) 375-4082, facebook.com/mobileom. Twilight in the Park: You need more enchiladas in your life. This year’s Twilight in the Park will feature a cocktail happy hour and appetizers and a four-course enchilada feast with recipes from restaurateur Cappy Lawton, writer and chef Chris Waters Dunn, and St. Anthony Hotel chef Michael Mata. Attendees will receive a copy of Enchiladas: From Aztec to Tex-Mex written by Lawton and Dunn. Proceeds will support programming to Travis Park. $150, 6-9pm, 301 E. Travis St., (210) 212-8423, http://saparksfoundation.org/events/twilight-in-the-park. Send food- and nightlife-related events to flavor@sacurrent.com.
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NIGHTLIFE
LAW & TERROIR
Niche and wild vinos at La Cruz de Comal Wines
•
The wines at this boutique joint are worth the drive.
RON BECHTOL
Lewis Dickson is a former Texas criminal defense attorney who has defended miscreants like former House Speaker Tom DeLay, but is now more than making up for it by turning out relentlessly natural vino from La Cruz de Comal Wines, a 3-acre vineyard near Canyon Lake. I arrived at the winery’s rustic tasting room, lined with original works by artists such as Cesar Martinez, early on a Sunday afternoon and was immediately handed a glass of Dickson’s Petard Blanc. Shakespeare immortalized the use of the word petard — as in “hoist with his own petard” (think small bomb designed to breach gates — though the term derives from French, meaning “breaking wind”). Dickson is intent on giving his modern Molotov a shot at immortality as well. And, to be fair about it, there may sometimes be malodorous consequences. Bear with me while I attempt to explain. The Petard is made from 100-percent Blanc du Bois, a new hybrid white grape that was developed for warm-climate planting and which Dickson believes is uniquely suited to the Hill Country environment. “I started out planting 10 different grapes, some of which might reasonably be expected not to work here,” he says. And most didn’t, leaving him with just the Blanc du Bois and Black Spanish, a grape that has been around since the Spaniards first set foot in Tejas — all this in defiance of the current mindset that hot-weather Mediterranean grapes are the wave of the Texas winemaking future. But Dickson doesn’t stop with bucking conventional viticultural wisdom — he is also steadfastly pursuing a
path of non-intervention in both the vineyards and in the My first experience of Dickson’s wines was singular; wine-making process. No sprays other than a compost some of them were initially almost stinky (though not “tea” are used in the vineyards. There’s no filtering, fining exactly farty), and there were intimations of pickle barrel. or other manipulation in the winery. No Mega Purple The dregs of one bottle I took home, the 2013 Black (colorant) or sulfites are added (though naturally occurring Spanish-based Troubadour, still came brawling out of the sulfites are both inevitable and desirable). “[Added] bottle after two weeks on the kitchen counter. But last Sulfites are annihilators,” says Dickson, and one of the week, with its more extensive tasting, grudging respect things he’s intent on not killing is the indigenous natural turned to admiration. Yes, there were still some hints of yeast. Commercial yeasts mow down all resistance (in this dill, and acidity reigned — even in bottles such as the case sugar) in their path, whereas “natural yeasts are like beguiling Falstaff’s Sack, aged in his “sherry shack,” a cats — a little bite here, a little bite there …” Like cats, of cave cut into the hill overlooking the vineyard. There was course, natural yeasts also tend to misbehave. the Tres Cosechas built on three vintages, another noseBut with time comes experience. “I just got the hang thumbing gesture. And that tough Troubadour, now in its of the Black Spanish in 2011,” he says, this after nine 2014 expression as Cuvée Sil (named for a friend who years of planting, pruning, harvesting and winemaking helped harvest grapes that survived a freeze that year), essentially by himself, though with some friendly was positively polished. consulting help. (It bears mentioning at this point that As the wines have limited retail availability (there are a farmer Dickson was once dedicated to the high life in few on lists as places like Liberty Bar and Bob’s Steak and Houston — one who could also afford to take two years Chop House), I suggest a drive out to the spread. A tasting off to live in France in the late ’90s, soaking up culture of six wines will set you back $15 — well worth it as the and, of course, wine.) One component of getting Black bottle prices are in line with the amount of work required Spanish right has been the decision to stop fermentation to turn them out. (Note that some work is also required of early in order to retain acid, a quality Dickson considers the consumer to store these wines properly, as so-called paramount in his wines. “No acid, no food “natural” wines tend to be unpredictable.) Doing pairing,” he says. Put all the parts together and so will also help Dickson achieve his ultimate goal La Cruz del Comal out comes this statement: “I want my wines to of “just sitting here listening to my songs (he’s 7405 FM 2722, be fully and honestly expressive [of place], even if Canyon Lake written some published R&B), eating my goat (830) 899-2723 that expression, like free speech, offends some.” lacruzdecomalwines.com cheese (the goats are yet to come — but they will) Which brings us back to the wines. and drinking my wine.” As a jury of one. Noon-6pm Sat-Sun sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 43
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NIGHTLIFE
BOTTLE & TAP
Catching up with Black Laboratory Brewing LANCE HIGDON
• Black Lab got their start through Break Fast & Launch.
A lot of scientific advancements have come out of a two-car garage: DIY biology, the Macintosh I, the warp drive a guy built in Omaha (dream big, right?). Black Laboratory Brewing is also run by two scientists operating out of a garage, but their efforts focus not on taking man into hyperspace but putting a great beer in his hand. Owners/brewers Tim Castaneda and Jeff Weihe first met in a more conventional lab, applying their respective backgrounds in microbiology and biochemistry to quality control research on food. Castaneda was already a homebrewer by then; after an offhand mention of his after-hours hobby to Weihe, they quickly decided to apply their experience to bringing out beers that would meet the standards of two demanding control groups: beer nerds and Joe Six-Packs. Castaneda cited two Texas breweries in particular — Real Ale and Saint Arnold — as inspiration. “Real Ale can make a beer like Fireman’s 4 ale and also make a beer like Blakkr and they’re both great,” Castaneda said in an email to the San Antonio Current. “Same with Saint Arnold: you can enjoy a Weedwacker and also have a Pumpkinator. But most importantly, they’re always consistent. Every time I have one of their beers I know that it will be the same.” So far, Black Laboratory’s output reflects this interest. Eminently drinkable styles like their California common and strawberry pale ale get equal time with
the duo’s wilder styles, like the stout brewed with vanilla extract and Costa Rican coffee or the maiboch with juniper and honey adjuncts. Every beer benefits from a scientific division of labor: Weihe, the chemist, scrutinizes water pH and the impact of fruits and spices, while Castaneda (the microbiologist) maintains a micro-Frankenstein’s castle of yeast cultivation. Castaneda and Weihe got an early operational boost from Break Fast & Launch, a San Antonio startup incubator. Castaneda credits the program with fitting their beer-making dreams to a business plan, teaching them in eight weeks lessons they would have otherwise taken months or years to master. Thus equipped, Castaneda and Weihe started taking their brews to the public. Recent outings have found them serving complimentary pints to Guadalupe Cultural Arts Center’s young professionals organization, Generation Ñ and the Westside arcade joint Dreamonoid’s. Black Laboratory also linked up with the San Antonio Cerveceros homebrew club to bring some micro-brewed options to a Scorpions match in October. Black Laboratory is taking it easy for the rest of 2015 to move from the garage to a commercial location. Happily for us, they have two more public events scheduled before New Year’s, so keep an eye on their social media channels for the details. It’s by far the tastiest way to study up on your science. sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 45
DOWNTOWN C E NTRA L The Local Bar
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Beer Depot
1304 S Laredo Everyday $2 Lone Star & PBR $2.5 Domestics, $3 Mexican Imports $4 Bottled Craft Brews Closed Sunday and Monday
On The Rocks Pub
270 Losoya, SATX 78205 facebook.com/ontherockspubTX HH: Mon-Fri, 2pm-7pm: $3 Wells, $3 Domestics, $3.75 Flavored Vodkas
Kimura
Happy hour monday - friday 4-7 Saturday 12-4 $6 Kimura Cocktails, $5 House Wines $4 Bottled Beer, $6 Draft Beer $3-$4 Appetizers, $6 Miso Ramen
Flair
6462 N. New Braunfels Ave. 78209 Flairmexicanstreetfood.com HH:Monday-Friday,4- 7pm, Sunday, 8-10 pm 1/2 price apps and Guac! $4 craft draughts $3 off cocktails and win $6 Michelada all day everyday
Tucker’s Kozy Korner
1338 E Houston St • (210) 320-2192 Sunday Brunch: Bloody Mary Bar and Bottomless Mimosas
Toro Taco Bar
114 Brooklyn Ave • torotacobar.com Reverse Happy Hour 9pm
Sancho’s
628 Jackson St, • (210) 320-1840 4- 7pm Every Day Frozen Margs: $2.25, Well Drinks: $3.25 Select Cans: $2.50 Monday - Wednesday: Reverse Happy Hour 9-11pm
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516 E Houston All Day Food and Drink Specials Everyday Kitchen Open Until 1am Everyday
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$2.50 Domestic long necks $2.75 well drinks everyday 2pm - 8pm
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Big Guido’s
HH: 4- 8pm Home of the $2.50 Well Drink! $2 Domestic Draft $3 Import Draft, Daily specials 8 till close Open Mon-Fri 4pm till 2am with happy hour from 4 to 6. Sat-Sun hours are 11am till 2am with all day specials.
2607 Jackson Keller • (210) 802-986 Free Wine Fridays with purchase of Adult Entrées
NORTH CENTRAL Michin Mexican Kitchen
7pm - 9pm $5 House Margaritas, $2.50 Domestic Bottles, Tecate & Dos XX, $3 Indio and Bohemia, and Mexican Draft $4. 427 N Loop 1604, Ste 202, SATX 78258 Behind Trader Joe’s
Slackers
Sports-Drinks-Arcade SlackerSA.com • $2.50 Domestics, $3 Wells Daily, $3 You Call It
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Mon-Sat: 7am - 4pm $3.25 Import Drafts & Mini Margaritas $2.75 Domestic Drafts Tue- $3.25 Mini Hurricanes Thu- $3.25 Premium Vodka Specials Sun- $.75 Wings & $3 Sunday Specials 4-8pm: $1 off mixed drinks & appetizers!
NORTH EAST Charlie Brown’s Bar & Grill
Charlie-Browns.com • 210-496-7092 Mon.Fri. until 7pm $2.75 well drinks, $8.50 domestic pitchers, $2.75 domestic longnecks Mon.-Fri. 2-6pm 60¢ Wings Wednesday special from $6.50 domestic draft pitchers
sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 47
FEATURED SHOWS
Nov. 12-15 Housecore Horror Film Festival
Nov. 16 - Combichrist
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Aiden The Ghost Inside Allison Weiss (Base) Beyond the Canvas Acacia Strain Havok | Black Fast Guttermouth Vampires Everywhere Punks for Tots Nik Turner’s Hawkwind (Base) 12/06 Bitter End
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48 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 • sacurrent.com
MUSIC
I TALKED WITH A ZOMBI
Pittsburgh gore-core duo takes a page from Goblin and the Necronomicon LANCE HIGDON
As any good VHS gore-hound can tell you, Zombi is the European title for George A. Romero’s Dawn of the Dead, an iconic undead flick that produced a series of sensuously gruesome Italian not-quitesequels borrowing the same name. Besides gifting the world with zombie-on-shark duels and helicopter decapitations, they all featured some of the best horror soundtracks ever produced. Composers like Cladio Simonetti and Fabio Frizzi warped the prog/ fusion trends of the day to produce a virtuosic music that deepens the dread between death scenes as capably as it amps up the inevitable Tom Savini splatter-fests. And while Simonetti’s band Goblin has itself been reanimated in recent years to perform these scores live, it’s the Pittsburgh duo Zombi that has carried the rotting-flesh flag for this music since forming in 2001. Comprised of bassist Steve Moore and drummer A.E. Paterra (both shoulder synthesizer duties as well), the band grew out of Steel City’s post-punk scene and is largely responsible for renewing interest in slasher movie soundtracks and analog synths among the basement-show set. The band went into semi-inactive status in 2011, punctuated by a dream tour opening for Goblin in 2013; this year, there’s a new record (Space Shift) and a headlining tour, capped off by their
performance on Sunday at Housecore. Zombi’s music is hard, in several senses. It is definitely hard to play. Moore and Paterra manage several synthesizers simultaneously, building spires of arpeggios on top of their Rush-worthy rhythm work. It’s also hard-sounding music, almost tactile in its toughness and lean in its precision, like the chrome guts of a Maserati engine. You might be speeding toward an anthropophagic death while a Zombi record plays, but you’re going to feel like a badass getting there. I spoke with Paterra during an appropriately dark and stormy night a few weekends ago, where our conversation ranged from Zombi’s resurrection as a touring band, their inaugural visit to SA, and a neglected Texas neo-prog touchstone. On Playing Housecore Housecore’s been asking for a number of years, so now it’s made sense with having a new record out and wanting to do some more touring. It worked out perfectly with our schedule. We actually play the last show of our tour in Pittsburgh and fly in to San Antonio the next day. What’s amazing is that Housecore was able to source us a Korg Poly-6 and a Sequential Circuits Prophet 600. That’s always the thing that’s difficult for us to want to do fly-ins, because for drums, I don’t like playing other kits, but it’s not that difficult. Same with playing through a different bass cab or whatever. That stuff is pretty interchangeable. But the two synthesizers are the workhorses of our set. We were going to adapt our set with cheaper, lighter, more transportable synthesizers, but from what Steve told me, things just weren’t sounding as good.
Relapse about them. So when we were planning a tour he was like “yeah, those guys would be great to have out with us—another two-piece, on the same label.” Also, I was a fan of the band Yeti that [Pinkish Black drummer] Jon Teague played in. The only music I ever heard was online somehow, and I just remember it was one of those moments where I was like “Holy shit, there are other bands that are kinda contemporaries of ours that kinda like prog!” I’m aware that there was an unfortunate death in the band [bassist Tommy Atkinson took his own life in 2010], so that was it for that. But that was a really cool band. On Zombi’s Return To Live Performance With Goblin, that was probably the best audience we could have played for. The perfect storm of people was there. After this tour, we’re curious to see what happens, because we haven’t toured in the longest time. We haven’t headlined a tour in the longest time — I think the last time we might’ve done that was 2007 or 2008. I’m curious to see what happens on this tour. We’re playing some smaller rooms, smaller sound systems. It’s certainly not on the level that we did with Goblin. But that’s how we were doing it years ago, so hopefully we still have the gusto to get through those kind of shows. I’m just looking forward to it to see what we can do on our own. Zombi will perform at 7 p.m. on Sunday, November 15 at The Aztec Theatre for the third annual Housecore Horror Festival.
On Zombi’s Texas Connection [Pinkish Black] opened the shows for Goblin when Steve was playing keyboards. He became friends with them and then I think Steve was the one that talked to
sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 49
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MUSIC
HORROR YOU CAN HEAR D.T. BUFFKIN /@DTBUFFKIN
•
Satan's Songbird, King Diamond
Phil Anselmo’s Housecore Horror Saturday starts off early at the Aztec Festival settles its dark cloud over us with Gasmiasma. Dropdead filter Thursday, November 12 (which would the convictions of the Earth/Animal be a great prequel title for the Friday Liberation Front through breakneck the 13th series). The band listings are, tempos that speed you through a truly, a Murderer’s Row of some of the tunnel of righteous anger and radical roughest, most aggressive, hell bent for politics, often in little over 30 seconds. hardcore, blistering bands in the genre, Following Dropdead is Crowbar, to say nothing of the macabre, hellish another N'awlins group adroitly set to films they’re running. follow the arthritis-inspiring speed of The festival officially begins at The Dropdead and bring the tempo back Korova with local outfit Aggravator, down to a decipherable pace — for the whose 2014 release Populace pissed stoners. Next in this ridiculous Destructor is a thrash gem, followed lineup of brutal beat-butchers are four by DFW’s The Black Moriah and their bands that are legendary and who no “black thrash.” The lineup is completed amount of print could do justice to: with Washington’s hasher-heads Black Detroit hardcore-godfathers Negative Breath — who sound fucking pissed — Approach, Corrosion of Conformity, and Idolatry. grindcore masters Agoraphobic Kicking shit off at the Aztec Theatre Nosebleed and Suffocation! stage on Friday is Child Bite, a band Sunday’s Aztec lineup will feature equal parts slip-n-slide-slaughter band Tristan Shone’s industrial noise tank Daughters (R.I.P.), System of a Down Author & Punisher; Oregon doom and Jesus Lizard. The Big Easy’s metal maestros YOB; the masked and Eyehategod will heave their 300-pound anonymous Ghoul who make a certain, corpse of a set into the eardrums of also shrouded, melodic-metal band of fans who want to hear the soundtrack a similar name sound like Lionel Richie; to dragging a dead priest through the Zombi; tempo-manipulators Incantation streets of New Orleans, followed by and Dario Argento darling’s Goblin. thrash legends Exodus, who, if The amount of eardrums your neck isn’t broken yet, will that will be shredded would be sure to have you reaching be tragic if the intent and Korova Stage: $10 (free for HHF for the brace by the end of purpose of HHF wasn’t to ticketholders) their speed-freak cacophany. lovingly punish with one Nov. 12-15, 107 E. King Diamond will round out of the most extreme and Martin St., thekorova.com the evening pummeling the profound metal/horror audience with his barbed-wirefests in the world. Bring Aztec Stage: $50sharp screeches and cries your mom and wear lots of $150 befitting Hell’s nativity scene. bright colors. Nov. 13-15, 104 N. St. Mary’s St., theaztectheatre.com
ON SALE NOW! sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 51
Role Playing & Rekindling the Romance
52 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 • sacurrent.com
MUSIC
WHY MERLE MATTERS
Why I would sacrifice my firstborn for the Hag D.T. BUFFKIN /@DTBUFFKIN
Raised up in a train boxcar, tunes, throughout his most recent work. which his father James When Kris Kristofferson was attempting converted into a home for to seduce Hollywood, just as he had his growing family, Merle Haggard Nashville — and more specifically its comes by his grindstone-and-grit roots biggest talents — and Dylan had crashed honestly. As authenticity has always his mojo into the Rock of Ages and was been prided and championed in folk fumbling around with a rotating cast of music and subsequently invented, black female backing trios, Merle was tailored and lied about for decades getting off easy, merely suffering from since the plow was left to rust in the fickle and dated studio production. But field, and the hillbillies headed to hills the tunes were still there, even if country of Beverly, Haggard lends incredible radio was moving closer and closer credence to the notion that a life of towards Van Halen Lite and further away hardship and pain makes for the best from the royal flush of talent that had artistic output. His real name is also dragged them kicking and screaming Merle Haggard, possibly the greatest through the ’70s, the melodies and country stage name ever, (some arrangements of tunes such as “Big City; coincidences are just too perfect). Going Where the Lonely Go; Someday Haggard’s father died when Merle When Things Are Good; Footlights,” the was nine and that’s when he “got entire Chill Factor album and about 15 mad.” Over the next 15 years, he was other heartbroken-by-a-song-title tunes placed in incarceration on 18 different are unbeatable. occasions, escaping 17 times. I understand that if you’ve gotten Haggard’s true talent, however, lies in this far in this article you probably are his pitch-perfect ability to sing of the motivated by some sort of connection to common folks’ troubles and Haggard and it’s very unlikely ailments. He could sing from you don’t know some of his Merle Haggard Are You There God, It’s Me music, but, on the off chance with Wayne “The Margaret and make it sound that this is an introduction for Train” Hancock like a train-hoppin’, paroleyou, in the spirit of Reading $40-$45 7pm, Fri, Nov. 13 breakin’, love ‘em and leave Rainbow, don’t take my word Floore’s Country Store ‘em, tears-in-my-beer anthem. for it. He’s the motherfucking 14492 Old Bandera Road He’s a melodist par best and I’m naming my (210) 695-8827 excellence, from his earliest firstborn after him. liveatfloores.com
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Esta Semana Ruben V. November 11 8pm - 10pm
Blake & Curran 7pm - 9pm
Blind Alley Nov 12 9pm - 11pm
West Kings Highway Nov. 13 7pm - 9pm
El Westside Sound System and Friends Nov. 15 1pm - 5pm
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628 Jackson St | 210-320-1840 sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 53
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54 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 • sacurrent.com
MUSIC
KRALL SPACE
The jazz-pop songstress debuts her softer, sadder side MATT STIEB/@MATTHEWSTIEB
Released in February, Diana Krall’s Wallflower takes its name from a Dylan tune, first recorded by the bard with San Anto’s sideburned hero on 1971’s Doug Sahm and Band. It falls into the category of Dylan tunes that rattle properly in the vocal chords of other artists — “Subterranean Homesick Blues” defines the other category of Dylan compositions and I pity the coffee house singers who give it a spin. On Krall’s take, “Wallflower” is a bleak three minutes. Over funeral strings and blocks of soft piano, she wanders in the ennui, in the romantic in-between. “Wallflower, Wallflower, won’t you dance with me” Krall asks. “I’m sad and lonely, too.” On Krall’s eleventh record, she uses this loneliness • like the saddest of all phone "Won't you dance with me?" camera filters, swaddling every note in a cold, soft light. She’s a wallflower in the cocktail party sense of the word, taking the doesn’t matter. Like Nat King Cole compositions of admired artists into or Nina Simone, Krall is fluid between the corner to sip a non-alcoholic drink these forms, finding multi-platinum and bum them out. adornment wherever she goes. In That’s not to say that this is a oneher 20-odd years of performance, dimensional collection of covers. Krall’s piano work has been versed On “California Dreamin,’” you can in blues, the rhythms of New Orleans hear both the autumnal sadness of and the block structures of master Mama Cass and Tupac’s summer-allDave Brubeck. Her bright contralto the-time shimmer. Bryan Adams and is search engine optimized for the Blake Mills join in for a couple duets, word “timeless.” She has this great adding a little warmth to the record’s conversational knack between her melancholy. I’m gonna pretend that instruments, riffing casually on the Michael Bublé cut isn’t on here, the melodies she brings up on the but you’ve got to appeal to the coffee microphone. counter crowd somehow. This slowcore pop record might be the bleakest we’ve seen At the piano and on the Krall during her tenure at the microphone, Krall is known Diana Krall top of the jazz charts. But, as as a jazz artist. Though here, $59.50-$99.50 ticket and record sales prove, 7:30pm Tue, Nov. 17 and in many past forays, she Majestic Theatre there’s still a great audience deals exclusively with the 224 E. Houston St. that wants to dance. We’re pop songbook. Like many (210) 226-5700 sad and lonely, too. majesticempire.com categorizations in music, it
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Mon-Fri: 3p-2a • Sat: 12p- 2a • Sun: 12p-12a sacurrent.com • November 11–17 2015 • CURRENT 55
MUSIC
SAT
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The First SA Harsh Noise & Power Electronics Fest
Wednesday, November 11 Cursus Tour Kick-off Drum and riff
duo Cursus prove that monotony and repetition don’t have to be dirty words. Especially when your primary concern is banging your fucking head. With Signalman and Blithe. Bottom Bracket Social Club, 9pm
Dirty Kid Discount If the World/Inferno
Friendship Society and Leftover Crack song “Soon We’ll be Dead” was drawn out over the catalog of an entire band. JK. Picking on the crusty folk-punks is low-hanging fruit, and their hearts are in the right place, but, goddamn what a shit name. With Kill Liberal, American Swine and The Hares. Korova, 8pm
The Dandy Warhols Forever associated
with their spoiled brat of a sibling Brian Jonestown Massacre, The Dandys and their fans are the crowd that every Brut or Jovan Musk cologne commercial was seeking to emulate and appeal to, however poorly, during the '90s alternative craze. Don’t you miss Nada Surf? With The Shivas. Paper Tiger, 7pm
Thursday, November 12 Crizzly The Boerne native has a pretty
consistent plan of attack: find a track from the trap and crunk heroes of Memphis, Houston and Atlanta and send them through an EDM bootcamp. Paper Tiger, 9pm
8373 CULEBRA STE. 103 • 210.521.4555 1639 BABCOCK RD. • 210.474.6005 56 CURRENT • November 11–17 2015 • sacurrent.com
Drum and Percussion Festival — PASIC15 See over 120 world-renowned drummers and percussionists in concerts, clinics, presentations and
more at the Percussive Arts International Convention (PASIC) WednesdaySaturday. Henry B. Gonzalez Convention Center, 9am
Juan Gabriel Madres y tias, rejoice! La
Voz esta aqui! Juan Gabriel is one of the most successful singer-songwriters of all time. He can break your heart or drop your panties, often in the same song. AT&T Center, 8pm
Whiskey Ignition “Southern metal sound with a bluesy twist.” Pretty much. With Over The Top. The Mix, 10pm
Friday, November 13
The Fall of Troy Why is a badass sludge
band like Kylesa opening for a whiney math rock band like TFOT? Why did Cliff Burton have to die? Why didn’t Ozzy stop after Randy Rhoads bit it? Some questions have no answers (that don’t involve $). With Kylesa, Powwers, Illustrations. Paper Tiger, 7pm
Gabby Annalyse Remember that Rebecca
Black song “Friday?” It goes like this, “Friday, Friday, blah blah blah blah Friday.” Same shit, different name. It’s for the kids. Woodlawn Theatre, 7pm
Junkie Cassette Release SA weed-rockers Junkie borrow from Wavves, rhyming “daze,” “blaze” “craze” and “laze” as frequently as they evoke teenage boredom and catchy guitar riffs on their Bong Dazed EP. With The Two Lips, Teenage Sexx, and More. Sound Crater Recording, 9pm
King Pelican and Snowbyrd SA surf-
BRYAN LEE TAYLOR
Imagine what armageddon will sound like — all twisting metal, cacophonous explosions, grinding alloy and inhuman screams of pain and despair. People will run through the streets tearing out their hair. Some will throw themselves from the greatest of heights, surrendering to the thunderous belches and roars, the soundtrack of Oblivion, provided by “bands” with names like Swallowing Bile, Rape-X, Garbage Mask, Molestar, Aqua-Eroticum, Rancid Ejaculator and Pissthrone. !!!!NOISE!!!! This is working music. You work to enjoy it. You gotta give yourself to it. It sure as hell isn’t The Eagles and it ain’t even Sabbath; maybe if Tony Iommi had lost his whole hand and played with just a scabrous, sored and rotten pulpy nub, beating the strings of his guitar, tuned to drop-Z while Wild Bill took a shit on his snare drum looking for the brown note and Geezer and Ozzy drank piss to the point of poisoning, puked into a mic, looped it and played it backwards. Noise, mama, NOISE!!!!! $9, 4pm, Paper Tiger, 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersa.com -dtbuffkin@ sacurrent.com
MUSIC
rockers King Pelican riff through instrumental variations on the (wait for it ... ) foundational “Pipeline” riff. San Antonio mainstays Snowbyrd are owners of a loose, bouncing, sporadically psychedelic set. The Mix, 10pm
Kyle Park He’s got two four-letter names, both resoundingly Caucasian, and he’s playing at Cowboys. You figure it out. Cowboys Dancehall, 7pm
Pinko With a history in heavy-minded SA
bands Sohns and The Grasshopper Lies Heavy, Pinko navigates through their self-titled debut with a great, math-like dexterity. With Guppy, Slurve, Anybody But The Cops. Bottom Bracket Social Club, 10pm
Saturday, November 14 Agnostic Front For those replete with
“orthopedic Dr. Marten’s good for wafflemaking and kicking through the shin,” Roger Miret and co. bring their NYxHC to the SA upstarts. With Ricochet, Confused and The Dispicables. Jack’s Patio Bar, 7pm
Bombon & Peligrosa Record Release Party Blending the rich history of Latin music with 808s, Bombon x Peligrosa is a compilation between the Houston and Austin DJ crews, eight years in the making. Phantom Room, 8pm
Cory Morrow I wanted to give him a chance,
so I picked “Nashville Blues” instead of one of the Christian sounding song titles to listen to. He drops all the right names. He may mean it, too. Then he sang, “I moved back to Austin,” and everybody cheered and I turned it off. Gruene Hall, 9pm
Ila Minori Minori’s worldly singer-
songwriter dynamic and pristine, singsong vocals works either intimately or with a full-piece band, showing that she is wise beyond her years. With Alix Williams, State Sponsored Programming, Cat the Manapult. Imagine Books & Records, 8pm
SA Indie RockFest Some of Texas’ premiere
Indie Rock bands come together to indie rock. Featuring: Octahedron, Verisimilitude, Tera Ferna, Lowly Servants, Little Image. Limelight, 7:30pm
La Catrina: Noche Azul Azul Barrientos’
monthly musical performance will focus on La Catrina, an image of a female skeleton made famous by Jose Guadalupe Posada used to mock the wealthy. Esperanza Peace & Justice Center, 8pm
The Robert Johnson SA Sessions with Guy Davis Celebrate the legacy of a blues genius and a beacon of highly contested SA recording history. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8pm
Sunday, November 15
Don Williams This one isn’t for most,
but those Williams boys still mean a lot to me; Hank, Don and Tennessee. I just hope that “I don’t believe in organic food,” from “I Believe in You” haunts him now. Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 7pm
Shmu Shoegaze is called such because
it supposedly induces staring at your shoes. With Ultraviolet and Hypersleep. K23 Gallery, 8:30pm
Monday, November 16
Combichrist The video for Combichrist’s
“Maggots at the Party” looks like a typical day in the Teller-Morrow body shop/clubhouse complete with motorcycle revving, stripper tonguelicking and 9am whiskey shooting ... and all the girls look like Kat Von D. These guys just missed the Family Values Tour. With The Birthday Massacre, MXMS, Echo Black. Korova, 7pm
Dan Walton and the Jump Swing Imperials Following a long stint with
Asleep at the Wheel, Dan Walton became one of the busiest and most respected musicians on the Austin music scene. He has wanted to lead a band like the JumpSwing Imperials for quite awhile, to play and sing the kind of romping dance music popularized by Louis Jordan and Wynonie Harris. Sam’s Burger Joint, 8:30pm
Tuesday, November 17
Wolverton Four songwriters trade off
cleverly-crafted tunes in a Bill Callahan vein, with lyrics collaborated on by Sylvia Plath and Hunter S. Thompson. Liberty Bar at the Convent, 7:30pm
AT&T Center 1 At&T Center Pkwy., (210) 444-5000, attcenter.com Bottom Bracket Social Club 1609 Colorado St., (210) 267-9160, facebook.com/bottombracketsocialclub Cowboys Dancehall 3030 NE Interstate 410 Loop, (210) 646-9378, cowboysdancehall.com/san-antonio Esparanza Peace & Justice Center 922 San Pedro Ave., (210) 228-0201, esparanzacenter.org Gruene Hall 1281 Gruene Road, (830) 606-1281 gruenehall.com Henry B. Gonzalez Convention Center 200 E. Market St., (210) 207-8500, sahbgcc.com Hi-Tones 621 E. Dewey Pl., (210) 573-6220, hitonessa.com Imagine Books & Records 8373 Culebra Road #201b (210) 236-7668 imaginebookstore.com Jack’s Bar 3030 Thousand Oaks, (210) 494-2309 jacksbarsa.com K23 Gallery 704 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 776-5635, facebook.com/K23gallery Liberty Bar 1111 S. Alamo St., (210) 227-1187 liberty-bar.com Limelight 2718 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 735-7775, thelimelightsa.com Paper Tiger 2410 N. St Mary’s St., papertigersa.com Phantom Room 2106 N. St. Mary’s St. Sam’s Burger Joint 330 E. Grayson St., (210) 223-2830, samsburgerjoint.com Sound Crater Recording 1908 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 837-1850, facebook.comsoundcraterrecording The Korova 107 E. Martin St., (210) 226-5070, thekorova.com The Mix 2403 N. St. Mary’s St, (210) 735-1313, Tobin Center for the Performing Arts 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624, tobincenter.org Woodlawn Theatre 1920 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 267-8388, woodlawntheatre.org
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BROADWAY, BABIES A friend of mine talks about his sex life almost constantly. Not quite like bragging, more matter-of-fact. For instance, out of the blue he will come out with this: “I was sitting in a bar and this broad looks at me and asks if I want to fuck. She had the tightest pussy I’ve ever had.” It just seems like conversation for him. I’m baffled by this. What’s going on with him? Not So Talky I want to say something like this: “The amount of pussy and/or cock a man is actually getting exists in inverse proportion to the amount of pussy and/ or cock a man brags about getting.” But it ain’t necessarily so. (“It Ain’t Necessarily So,” Porgy and Bess, music by George Gershwin [PBUH], lyrics by Ira Gershwin [PBUH].) I’ve known plenty of guys who bragged constantly about getting tons of ass, and they weren’t all liars. Almost every one of them, however, was deeply insecure — they bragged about the ass they were getting because they feared people saw them as guys who couldn’t get ass in a donkey storm. I was stroking my partner and went for the lube, when he informed me that he prefers to have his handjobs sans lube. He says that lube is messy. For the past three years, he has raved about my handjobs and said my skills are professional level, and never once did he complain about the lube. I attempted to follow through, but all my old techniques didn’t work. I asked him to show me how, what he likes, and he said just do the same as I’ve always done. The sliding, gliding, twisting motions that I usually use, all with a reasonable amount of squeezing, just DO NOT WORK without lube. My hand stuck to the dampish skin and would not slide. He says I am making a big deal out of nothing, but I am upset. One of the best tools in my sexual toolbox has just been rendered unusable. Sincerely Laments Obstructed Wanking You need to listen to the original Broadway cast recording of Wicked,
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by Dan Savage
music and lyrics by Stephen Schwartz (PBUH). When Idina Menzel sings “Defying Gravity,” pretend she’s singing “defying aridity.” Apparently that’s your boyfriend’s superpower, or his cock’s superpower: aridity — “being without moisture, extremely dry, parched” — is no impediment to pleasure. And it’s not an uncommon superpower, SLOW. Lots of guys prefer lubeless handjobs. So have your boyfriend jack himself off while you listen to Wicked, see what works for him, and then try not to make a big deal — try not to make any sort of deal — out of his handjob preferences going forward. I usually like your advice, Dan, but I was dismayed when both you and Peter Staley got it wrong in your response to STATUS, the woman who was preparing to divorce her HIV+ husband after the revelation of another affair. You both seemed to think she was trying to get her husband sent to prison. I think she was trying to avoid that outcome! She wants her husband to tell the truth in therapy, but she’s concerned doing so will land him in prison. Here’s something else you both missed: When someone tells a therapist what they have already done, the reporting requirements are far less stringent than when a patient tells what they plan on doing. If a therapist believes a patient is likely to harm themselves or others in the future, the therapist may have to act. Patient confidentiality carries a lot of weight when it comes to past actions. Really Regular Reader You weren’t the only reader who came to STATUS’s defense. It’s possible Peter and I got it wrong — our familiarity with cases where vengeful exes abused reporting laws to go after HIV+ people may have colored our response. On the off chance I got it wrong, RRR, I’m going to need to be punished. It should be something that really hurts. Oh, I know: I’ll listen to the original Broadway cast recording of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat. Twice.
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“Turn it Down” — but not all the way. ACROSS
1 B as in baklava 5 Belief system 10 “Family Feud” option 14 On the summit of 15 Pipe cleaner brand? 16 “Like ___ out of Hell” 17 Amazed 19 Diggs of “Private Practice” 20 Blase (or just blah) feeling 21 Night, in Italy 23 “___ Walks in Beauty” (Byron poem) 24 Short short time? 26 Topping in a tub 28 Part of TBS, for short 31 Author Fleming 33 Tit-tat filler 34 “That’s so sweet” 38 Emphatic turndown 42 Glassful at a cantina, perhaps 43 Win all the games 45 Oregon Ducks uniform designer since 1999 46 “Lunch is for ___” (“Wall Street” quote) 48 Like Goofy but not Pluto 50 Long meal in Japan? 52 LPs, to DJs 53 Possesses 54 Showtime series of the 2000s 59 Little dog’s bark 61 “___ the Walrus”
62 Marina craft 64 Washer/dryer units? 68 Downright rotten 70 “You’ve really outdone yourself at sucking,” or this puzzle’s theme? 72 TV component? 73 Microscopic 74 Active Sicilian volcano 75 Dark form of quartz 76 Desirable quality 77 “Round and Round” band
DOWN
1 Film with the segment “Pork Is a Nice Sweet Meat” 2 English prep school 3 Dot on a state map 4 High score 5 Hall of Leno’s “The Tonight Show” 6 1982 Disney film with a 2010 sequel 7 Anarchy 8 “And that’s ___ grow on” 9 Not quite 10 Vanna’s cohost 11 Make embarrassed 12 Give a quick welcome 13 Hard to climb 18 Kids’ song refrain that’s all vowels 22 PayPal cofounder Musk
25 Cleveland NBAers 27 Erroneous 28 “Begin the Beguine” clarinetist Artie 29 Late baseballer Berra 30 Like one leg of a triathlon 32 Former House speaker Gingrich 35 Boutonniere setting 36 Kareem’s original name 37 “Man, that hurts!” 39 “Well, we just lost” sound 40 Retailer with a snaky floor plan 41 Wine cellar options 44 Eugene Ionesco production 47 Stitches up 49 Outcast 51 Controversial Nabokov novel 54 Connect with 55 New ___ (Yale locale) 56 Zooey’s big sister in acting 57 Basic learning techniques 58 Dropperfuls, say 60 “___ to the people!” 63 Sheet of postage stamps 65 ___Vista (onetime search engine) 66 “Stop that!” 67 Go after, as a fly 69 “Superman” villain Luthor 71 “All the news that’s fit to print” initials
ETC.
FREE WILL ASTROLOGY by Rob Brezsny ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19): “I demand unconditional love and complete freedom,” wrote Slovenian poet Tomaž Šalamun. “That is why I am terrible.” In accordance with the astrological omens, I’m offering you the chance, at least temporarily, to join Šalamun in demanding unconditional love and complete freedom. But unlike him, you must satisfy one condition: Avoid being terrible. Can you do that? I think so, although you will have to summon unprecedented amounts of emotional intelligence and collaborative ingenuity.
TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20): You have the answers you need, but you keep sniffing around as if there were different or better answers to be had. Moreover, you’ve been offered blessings that could enable you to catalyze greater intimacy, but you’re barely taking advantage of them — apparently because you underestimate their potency. Here’s what I think: As long as you neglect the gifts you have already been granted, they won’t provide you with their full value. If you give them your rapt appreciation, they will bloom.
GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20): Edgar Rice Burroughs (1875-1950) tried to earn a living by selling pencil sharpeners, but couldn’t make it. In frustration, he turned to writing novels. Success! Among his many popular novels, 27 of them were about a fictional character named Tarzan. The actor who played Tarzan in the movies based on Burroughs’ books was Johnny Weissmuller. As a child, he suffered from polio, and rebuilt his strength by becoming a swimmer. He eventually won five Olympic gold medals. Burroughs and Weissmuller are your role models in the coming weeks, Gemini. It’s a favorable time for you to turn defeat into victory.
CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22): Artist Andy Warhol had an obsession with green underpants. In fact, that’s all he ever wore beneath his clothes. It might be fun and productive for you to be inspired by his private ritual. Life is virtually conspiring to ripen your libido, stimulate your fertility, and expedite your growth. So anything you do to encourage these cosmic tendencies could have an unusually dramatic impact. Donning green undies might be a good place to start. It would send a playful message to your subconscious mind that you are ready and eager to bloom.
LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22): In the coming weeks, take special notice of the jokes and humorous situations that prompt you to laugh the loudest. They will provide important clues about the parts of your life that need liberation. What outmoded or irrelevant taboos should you consider breaking? What inhibitions
are dampening your well-being? How might your conscience be overstepping its bounds and making you unnecessarily constrained? Any time you roar with spontaneous amusement, you will know you have touched a congested place in your psyche that is due for a cleansing.
VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22): For each of the last 33 years, the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals in Los Angeles has selected a “National Hero Dog.” It’s an award given to a canine that has shown exceptional courage in helping or rescuing people. In 2015, the group departed from tradition. Its “National Hero Dog” is a female cat named Tara. Last May, she saved a four-year-old boy by scaring off a dog that had begun to attack him. I’m guessing you will soon have an experience akin to Tara’s. Maybe you’ll make a gutsy move that earns you an unexpected honor. Maybe you’ll carry out a dramatic act of compassion that’s widely appreciated. Or maybe you’ll go outside your comfort zone to pull off a noble feat that elevates your reputation.
LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22): According to cartoon character Homer Simpson, “Trying is the first step towards failure.” I don’t agree with that comic advice. But I do think the following variant will be applicable to you in the coming weeks: “Trying too hard is the first step toward failure.” So please don’t try too hard, Libra! Over-exertion should be taboo. Straining and struggling would not only be unnecessary, but counterproductive. If you want to accomplish anything worthwhile, make sure that your default emotion is relaxed confidence. Have faith in the momentum generated by all the previous work you have done to arrive where you are now.
childhood and analyzing the family dynamic. In accordance with the astrological omens, I recommend that you write a letter to your own father — even if it’s filled with praise and gratitude instead of complaint. At this juncture in your life story, I think you especially need the insights that this exercise would generate. (P.S. Write the letter for your own sake, not with the hope of changing or hurting or pleasing your dad. You don’t have to give it to him.)
CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19): Shizo Kanakuri was one of Japan’s top athletes when he went to compete in the marathon race at the 1912 Stockholm Olympics. Partway through the event, fatigued by sweltering heat, bad food, and the long journey he’d made to get there, Kanakuri passed out. He recovered with the help of a local farmer, but by then the contest was over. Embarrassed by his failure, he sneaked out of Sweden and returned home. Fast forward to 1966. Producers of a T V show tracked him down and invited him to resume what he’d started. He agreed. At the age of 74, he completed the marathon, finishing with a time of 54 years, eight months. I think it’s time to claim your own personal version of this opportunity, Capricorn. Wouldn’t you love to resolve a process that got interrupted?
AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18): In most sporting events, there’s never any doubt about which competitor is winning. Each step of the way, the participants and spectators know who has more points or goals or runs. But one sport isn’t like that. In a boxing match, no one is aware of the score until the contest is finished — not even the boxers themselves. I think you’re in a metaphorically comparable situation. You won’t find out the final tally or ultimate decision until the “game” is complete. Given this uncertainty, I suggest that you don’t slack off even a little. Keep giving your best until the very end.
PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20): One night as you lie sleeping in your bed, you will dream of flying through the sunny summer sky. The balmy air will be sweet to breathe. Now and then you will flap your arms like wings, but mostly you will glide effortlessly. The feeling that flows through your body will be a blend of exhilaration and ease. Anywhere you want to go, you will maneuver skillfully to get there. After a while, you will soar to a spot high above a scene that embodies a knotty problem in your waking life. As you hover and gaze down, you will get a clear intuition about how to untie the knots. Whether or not you remember this dream, the next day you will work some practical magic that begins to shrink or dissolve the problem.
THIS MODERN WORLD by Tom Tomorrow
SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21): Elsie de Wolfe (1859-1950) was a pioneer in the art of interior design. She described herself as “a rebel in an ugly world.” Early in her career she vowed, “I’m going to make everything around me beautiful,” and she often did just that. In part through her influence, the dark, cluttered decor of the Victorian Era, with its bulky draperies and overly ornate furniture, gave way to rooms with brighter light, softer colors, and more inviting textures. I’d love to see you be inspired by her mission, Scorpio. It’s a good time to add extra charm, grace, and comfort to your environments. SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21): At the age of 36, author Franz Kafka composed a 47-page letter to his father Herman. As he described the ways that his dad’s toxic narcissism and emotional abuse had skewed his maturation process, he refrained from lashing out with histrionic anger. Instead he focused on objectively articulating the facts, recounting events from
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VOLLEYBALL FANS mark your calendars
NOVEMBER 20-22 | HOSTED By: AT THE UTSA CONVOCATION CENTER
TICKET PRICES:
$20- All Session $10- Single Day Adult $7- Single Day Youth C-USA Students – Free with ID
FOR TICKETS: 210-458-UTSA OR goUTSA.com