San antonio current october 14, 2015 by Chava Communications

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4 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

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San Antonio Current Publisher: Michael Wagner Associate Publisher: Lara Fischer

Editorial

New Season. New Kicks.

Senior Editors: Bryan Rindfuss, Jessica Elizarraras Interim Art Director: Sarah Flood-Baumann Food & Nightlife Editor: Jessica Elizarraras Music Editor: Matt Stieb Staff Writers: Mark Reagan, Michael Marks Digital Content Editor: Albert Salazar Contributors: Ron Bechtol, D.T. Buffkin, Ainsley Caffrey, Erik Casarez, Murphi Cook, James Courtney, Jade Esteban Estrada, Dan R. Goddard, Lance Higdon, Steven G. Kellman, Kiko Martínez, Jeremy Martin, Jeff Meyers, Gary Sweeney, J.D. Swerzenski Editorial Interns: Rohit Chandan, Angelica Flores, Austin Guerrero, Carlo Jagge, Gabriela Mata, James McCandless, Taylor Medrano, Besan Radwan, Shannon Sweet, Patricia Valdez

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6 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

Get listed - Send us your info two weeks before publication. For complete submission guidelines, visit sacurrent.com. E-mail sacalendar@sacurrent.com; Mail - Calendar Editor, same address as above; Fax - (210) 227-7755 Listing submissions are not accepted by phone. Copyright - The entire contents of the San Antonio Current are copyright 2015 by Euclid Media Group LLC. Reproduction in whole or in part without written permission of the publisher is prohibited. Publisher does not assume any liability for unsolicited manuscripts, materials, or other content. Any submission must include a stamped, self-addressed envelope. All editorial, advertising, and business correspondence should be mailed to the address listed above. Subscriptions - Additional copies or back issues may be purchased at the Current offices for $1. Six-month domestic subscriptions may be purchased for $75; one-year subscriptions for $125.

San Antonio Symphony performs Windborne’s Music of Queen featuring Guest Conductor Brent Havens and Vocalist Brody Dolyniuk

The Music of

QUEEN OCTOBER 23, 2015, 8:00 P.M. Majestic Theatre

Brody Dolyniuk delivers a dynamite rendition of Freddie Mercury vocals, performing smash hits such as “Bohemian Rhapsody,” “We Will Rock You,”“Another One Bites the Dust” and more. San Antonio Symphony performs Windborne’s Music of Led Zeppelin featuring Guest Conductor Brent Havens and Vocalist Randy Jackson BALCONES HEIGHTS POLICE OFFICERS 1st/2nd/3rd Prizes will be distributed in each age category. ASSOCIATION Prizes sponsored by Spirit Halloween. HAUNTED HOUSE registration at 11AM. LOCATED IN B61 0-1 yr 12:00 8-9 yr 2:00 (formerly Anna’s Linens) 10-11 yr 2:30 2-3 yr 12:30 12 PM – 4 PM 12-13 yr 3:00 DONATION ADMISSION ACCEPTED. 4-5 yr 1:00 ALL DONATIONS BENEFIT BLUE 6-7 yr 1:30 SANTA TOY DRIVE.

All pumpkins (real/artificial) must be dropped off at the Pumpkin Patch by Oct. 24 at 1 PM. Prizes for Pumpkin Patch will be announced at 4 PM on the Main Stage.

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The Music of Led Zeppelin sasymphony.org | Ticketmaster.com | 800.745.3000

OCTOBER 24, 2015, 8:00 P.M. Majestic Theatre

The Music of Led Zeppelin, a full rock band, joins the San Antonio Symphony to convey the Zeppelin spirit with timeless tunes including “Stairway to Heaven,” “Whole Lotta Love,” and the “Immigrant Song”!

SASYMPHONY.ORG | (210) 554-1010 | TICKETMASTER.COM sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 7

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8 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

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sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 9

On view through January 10

McNay Art Museum San Antonio, Texas 6000 North New Braunfels San Antonio, Texas 78209-0069 mcnayart.org 10 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

EXHIBITION ORGANIZED BY THE SEATTLE ART MUSEUM AND THE MUSEO NACIONAL CENTRO DE ARTE REINA SOFÍA. THIS EXHIBITION IS SUPPORTED BY AN INDEMNITY FROM THE FEDERAL COUNCIL ON THE ARTS AND THE HUMANITIES. JOAN MIRÓ, FIGURE AND BIRD, 1968. LOST-WAX CASTING, PATINATED BRONZE. NACIONAL CENTRO DE ARTE REINA SOFÍA. © SUCCESSIÓ MIRÓ / ARTISTS RIGHTS SOCIETY (ARS), NEW YORK / ADAGP, PARIS 2015.

Chrysta Bell

Photo credit: Carlo William Rossi

October 23 – 24, 2015

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26 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

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sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 27

GOT A MILLION DOLLAR SWING? October 16-25

10:30 a.m. to 6:30 p.m. daily Polo Field Golf Center at Brackenridge Park – Home of The First Tee Take your best shot from 125 yards for your chance to win prizes. Top shots each day get a chance at the million dollars or a trip to the Caribbean, as well as great daily prizes from: Dave & Buster’s | Fleming’s Prime Steakhouse Hard Rock Cafe | Kiolbassa Provision Co. Paesanos Restaurant Group | Rudy’s Bar-B-Q SeaWorld San Antonio | The Club at Sonterra Topgolf | Valero Texas Open

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28 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

CALENDAR

Grimm. Set in the 1980s, their Red comes complete with a Prince-inspired soundtrack. $12-$15 (free for kids under 2), 9:45am & 11:30am WednesdayThursday, 9:45am, 11:30am & 7pm Friday, 2pm Saturday; Magik Theatre, 420 S. Alamo St., (210) 227-2751.

So You Think You Can Dance Modeled

after Season 12 of TV’s So You Think You Can Dance, this national tour pits Team Stage against Team Street in a highenergy show featuring “sizzling, one-ofa-kind dance routines” performed by Top 10 finalists. $45-$65, 8pm Thursday; The Majestic Theatre, 224 E. Houston St., (210) 226-3333.

The Midtown Men A sharp-dressed

band comprising original performers from the Broadway hit Jersey Boys, The Midtown Men (Christian Hoff, Michael Longoria, Daniel Reichard and J. Robert Spencer) deliver a blast from the past by reinterpreting classics by the likes of the Beatles, the Rascals, the Turtles, the Beach Boys and the Four Seasons. $29.50$74.50, 7:30pm Wednesday; Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624.

The Music Man The Playhouse revives

Meredith Willson and Franklin Lacey’s 1957 Tony winner The Music Man. Inspired by Willson’s boyhood in Iowa, the musical follows con man extraordinaire Harold Hill as he poses as a bandleader and falls for the town librarian and piano teacher. $12-$30, 8pm Friday-Saturday, 3pm Sunday; The Playhouse, 800 W. Ashby Pl., (210) 733-7258.

Words

Azar Nafisi Best known for her 2003

memoir Reading Lolita in Tehran, The New York Times bestselling author Azar Nafisi reads from her book The Republic of Imagination in conjunction with the Public Library Foundation’s forthcoming fourth annual San Antonio Book Festival (April 2, 2016). Free, 5pm Sunday; Rosenberg Sky Room, University of the Incarnate Word, 4301 Broadway, (210) 225-4728.

Friday-Saturday; Masonic Lodge, 212 City St., (210) 316-2177.

San Antonio Photo Tournament Billed as

the “instant gratification photographer’s challenge,” this third annual event invites shutterbugs of all skill levels (ages 12 and up) to test their DSLR skills in a timed tournament encompassing a variety of categories to be announced during registration on Sunday morning. For details, visit meetup.com/photosa. $20$40 per person (pre-registration required), 8am-2pm Sunday; Dominion Country Club, One Dominion Drive, (210) 241-4920.

Hope on the Runway/Beneath the Stars Nonprofit organization Fa-Boob-

Licious teams up with the Priest Holmes Foundation for a runway event featuring fashions modeled by breast cancer fighters and survivors of all ages, a preshow presentation from designers Angelin de Carlo and Rebecca Medina, live music by Finding Friday and an afterparty at Paramour. $35, 6:30pm Thursday; Riverwalk Plaza, Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624.

Talks Plus

A Close Look At Vista Ridge Water Pipeline The Alamo Group of the Sierra

Club welcomes Save Our Springs Alliance director Bill Bunch for a presentation shedding light on SAWS’ 2012 water management plan and the Vista Ridge pipeline deal. Free, 6:30-8:30pm Tuesday; William R. Sinkin EcoCentro, 1802 N. Main Ave., (210) 829-5632.

Architecture as Rendered Society

The UTSA College of Architecture, Construction and Planning, in partnership with AIA San Antonio’s Latinos in Architecture welcomes architect Andrés Jaque as part of CACP’s 2015-16 Speaker Series. Founder of the Office for Political Innovation, Jaque seeks to explore architecture that connects the city, the domestic, the infrastructural and the natural. Free, 5:30pm Wednesday; UTSA Buena Vista Theater, 501 W. César E. Chávez Blvd., (210) 458-2000.

Carrie Fountain & David Liss Gemini Ink

and The Twig welcome esteemed poet Carrie Fountain (Instant Winner, Burn Lake) and bestselling novelist David Liss (A Conspiracy of Paper, The Day of Atonement) for a reading to be followed by a reception and book signing. Free, 6:30-8pm Friday; The Twig Book Shop, 306 Pearl Pkwy., Suite 106, (210) 826-6411.

Special Events

Ghost Hunt The Ghost Seekers of Texas

invite the adventurous to use real-deal equipment on 90-minute tours of a Masonic Lodge allegedly known for paranormal activity. $20, 9pm-1am sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 29

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ARTS + CULTURE

WEST SIDE PRIDE San Anto Cultural Arts' new executive director talks public art, funding MARK REAGAN/@210REAGAN

For more than two decades, the communityfocused San Anto Cultural Arts impacted the near West Side through public art in an effort to foster community and human development in one of the poorest, least educated areas in the city. The arts organization, which is housed in what used to be a butcher shop on El Paso Street, is known for colorful murals that can be found throughout the near West Side. However, 2015 will be special for San Anto Cultural Arts as it will dedicate its 50th mural later this year. San Anto Cultural Arts’ new executive director Pablo Miguel Martinez, who took the helm in June, will usher the milestone in. Martinez is the latest in a series of directors to run San Anto after longtime executive director Manny Castillo died in 2009. He’s not Castillo and will never be Castillo, which he readily admits, but Martinez cares about the neighborhood, the arts and the people who live there. Last year, 527 young people and 161 adults took part in San Anto programs. The San Antonio Current sat down with Martinez last week to talk about the challenges San Anto Cultural Arts faces as a small nonprofit while also closing in on its 50th mural. Can you talk about public art in San Antonio, particularly on the West Side? So, I get very defensive about it, and here’s the reason why. I think when you talk about public art in San Antonio, and it’s fortunate to be in a city that’s supportive, murals are far down on the list. When people talk about public art, they think large-scale sculpture and Downtown. And the truth is, San Anto Cultural Arts is the single largest maker of public art in San Antonio. To date, we have created 49 murals in the near West Side. My theory is, because the people who determine these lists (about public art) rarely make their way to the near West Side, it’s not on the radar. It’s forgotten about. What’s your reaction to tagging or graffiti? Do I get upset if one of those murals are tagged? Sure. We don’t have any kind of funding to maintain the murals, but there’s also no conservation and no restoration [funds for] murals. But here’s my feeling about tagging ... So there’s an older mural [the Peace

and Remembrance Wall off South Trinity Street] a few blocks from here that was tagged. Some of it is sophomoric or it’s vulgar or about body parts, but sometimes there is something that is making a statement. This one that was tagged recently said “Cops Kill.” I like that people were offended. Because if it truly is a form of public art then I think to be offended by that mural being tagged, is you’re not treating it as public art. This is part of dialogue Top: Muralist Ruth Buentello works on Piedad in 2003. Bottom: San Anto's first mural with a community. This is a community Educacion (1994). that is economically impoverished and historically oppressed. I would actually And it’s interesting to me that when I look at some of the be upset if every mural remained pristine. I love that a documents that there are increases for other agencies, work of public art becomes a place for someone to say but for some reason, San Anto comes out dead last. So something. You can’t do that other places. my job has been to find out why that has been the case. Does San Anto face funding challenges? I wish in terms of murals we would look at Philadelphia, which has an amazing mural program that’s funded by the city. Los Angeles has a mural conservancy project, which is amazing and really well funded. We don’t have that. And the other thing to remember is, we’re not the only game in town. There are a lot of organizations that put up murals. We don’t own, in any way, the whole mural game in this city. So we do all of this on a really tiny budget.

Can you talk about El Placazo? I hear all the time, go digital. Well, the digital divide runs right down this neighborhood. The teen pregnancy rate is two to three times the national average in this census tract. So it presents a challenge. The opportunity is, in small part, we get to be a voice for people who are voiceless. So that gets back to the issue, I love the tagging. That’s your voice and that’s what is on your mind right now. I love that.

sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 31

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877.223.6775 32 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

ARTS + CULTURE

ARTIST ON ARTIST

Gary Sweeney Interviews Jon Lee GARY SWEENEY

Jon Lee is a master printmaker and a professor at Trinity University. I remember my first reaction upon seeing an exhibit of his work: The prints were so subtle, dreamy and transparent that they seemed barely there, and yet their craftsmanship and complexity were unmistakable. I had the pleasure of meeting him later; and despite his quiet demeanor, he’s actually warm and friendly, with a very droll sense of humor. His wife, who also teaches art at Trinity and the Southwest School of Art, is the perfect counterbalance to his reserve, and together they make a very impressive art partnership. We sat down and talked over Mexican food. When you were growing up in Korea was most of your impression of America formed by the movies? Any movie in particular? I learned most of it in school: that without America we were doomed and that America was important in keeping the peace in East Asia. Then my older siblings had very different opinions about that, and for a long time I was not sure what to think. So I guess I had to come here to figure it out. Were you raised in an artistic household? No. However, my brother went to art school and my sister married an artist. I’m not sure why that happened. Was there a moment or piece of artwork that made you want to become an artist? I was always drawing as a child, all the time, and I was always questioning the older culture. I was rebellious — when somebody told me to do something, I would do the opposite. And I also knew I wanted to help people, though at the time I didn’t know what that meant. Why did you decide to come to America? I was working as a professional printmaker in Korea. I wanted to be more proficient at lithography, so I came to study at the [internationally renowned print studio] Tamarind Institute. What was the most startling difference you noticed when you began your stay here? In Korea, the culture is that you must respect your elders no matter what. While I do not think this is a bad thing, it also applies if a fool is a year older than you — you can’t say anything to them, just obey. Or that students or children cannot question their elders. So I guess you would say I like that there are perhaps less restrictions, in that sense. How would you describe your artwork? I really enjoy simplicity and straightforwardness. Most importantly, I consider that everyday objects hold a unique

beauty, and I take the time to see that simple beauty and bring that to my artwork. It all started with a tiny 16thcentury bowl made by a peasant in Korea for everyday use. Although small and crude and insignificant, it is now, in Japan, enshrined and worshipped as an object of perfection. The way it was experienced and handled and used is a big part of what it is now. We have many such interactions with objects every day. Those simple interactions with simple objects are what my work talks about. Each series is different. I take everyday objects or movie credits as subjects, and I print them on handmade paper. I also use a rather pale, muted palette — I like to use natural colors. Now that I am older, I realize that my art also helps me know myself. Leo and I talk about that a lot: how much we personally benefit from being artists because we get to explore and talk about ourselves, the world around us, how we feel about it and work all that stuff out, as our job. That is pretty cool. And every artist does it. Just like your work is not about you but also all about you and could only be made by you. What is it about printmaking that draws you in? It fits in with my personality. I’ve always really liked the concept of original multiples. It is very democratic. Unlike paintings, you can make work that is affordable and shareable. Print technology had huge effects on society, especially movable type, which democratized knowledge.

I also love the process. Printmaking requires you to invent things. I make my own tools, my own paper and I build and work on the presses. And I also love paper. Paper is beautiful. If I could get away with it, I might just make paper and exhibit that! Prints and paper go hand in hand, and technically evolved hand in hand. Your prints are amazingly complex, yet that quality might seem lost on the average viewer. Does that bother you? A little. There’s a video that accompanied my exhibit at the McNay Art Museum, and it shows the process. Although my art is about the simple things in life, it may not be understood as simply, at least not at first. Talent: Do some people have it and some don’t? Yes. Everyone has some kind of talent. And everyone has potential. Each person has to figure out what their talent is and nurture it. What’s the best advice you give your students? Actually, I listen to them a lot. I approach each student as an individual, and together we determine the best way for them to proceed through the art process. I also tell them to go out and experience different things and to trust themselves. CONTINUED ON PAGE 37 ►

sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 33

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Is there a Korean style? Could you walk into a gallery and notice a painting or print with a certain familiar look or set of elements? Yes, there are things I would recognize as 100 percent Korean and I’m sure they would recognize those elements in my work.

figurative, we complement each other. We’re very good at making books together because I’m good with angles and straight lines and she’s very good at the sewing end, which I am not. Mostly we just support each other and take turns juggling our children, work and art.

What’s the biggest change you’ve noticed in students over the course of your teaching career? “Jobs! Jobs! Jobs!” That’s what they think about. It’s a sad thing, but I understand given the cost of education. Especially in the arts there are few well-paid jobs, and it is hard to justify spending all that time and money when you don’t later earn lots of money. That is a problem with society though; that education is not a valid enough reason, but a higher salary is.

If you could own any piece of artwork what would it be? I’m really not interested in museum artwork. To be honest, my favorite artists are unknown craftsmen.

Your wife Leo is also an accomplished artist. Are there certain challenges to having two creative people in the household? Doesn’t one of you have to be normal? We are completely non-competitive and since one of us is an abstract minimalist and the other is a narrative

I can’t imagine you ever completely freaking out. Can you think of an instance in which you would just lose your composure? Parenting will always make anyone freak out. You can’t help it, but I feel losing my temper to be a shameful thing. I think people freak out too much. We only realize it when we freak out over things we shouldn’t, then feel embarrassed after. But if you look at the times you think it was okay, you notice that maybe it would have been better to stay calm. We’re all overworked and freaking out — it’s nicer if we don’t dump our crap on others, when we can help it.

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In the opening narration of Pan, a prequel to the Peter Pan story, we learn that “sometimes friends begin as enemies, and enemies begin as friends.” It should be noted that the people who are friends in the beginning of the film remain friends throughout, and those who begin as enemies remain enemies. Lit-geeks call this an unreliable narrator. Of course, we know where this is headed. Peter (Levi Miller) and Hook (Garrett Hedlund) go on to become enemies, just not in this movie. This is a story about how Peter gets to Neverland, meets fairies, learns he can fly and attempts to defeat the evil pirate Blackbeard (Hugh Jackman). Hook and Peter meet as child laborers forced to mine for fairy dust in Blackbeard’s cordoned-off section of Neverland. Hook and Peter strike up a symbiotic bond, eventually escaping and meeting Tiger Lily (Rooney Mara), princess of the Lost Children, and learning a series of revelatory truths about Peter. The story holds together well enough, and the

visuals are jovial eye candy (the July 24 release date was pushed back to October 9 to allow more time to complete the extensive visual effects). The first big action sequence is a blast, as boys are snatched from an orphanage and whisked away on a flying pirate ship that swerves left, right, down and up all the way into outer space, only to come down in Neverland. In 3D, this looks fantastic. Subsequent action scenes aren’t quite as successful, except for the finale, which is huge and impressive. A word on the performances: They’re terrible. Jackman snarls his way through playing Blackbeard and looks like a circus clown geisha with hideous makeup and costumes. His appearance is too ridiculous to be fearsome or intimidating. He also resorts to the crutch of yelling when trying to be scary, which is almost always a mistake. He’s a good enough actor to know being truly intimidating comes through the eyes and body language, not projection of the voice. Any idiot can yell, after all. Then again his clothes are so baggy it would’ve been hard for him to use much body language at all. As for Hedlund, he plays Hook like a cross between Indiana Jones and Karl Urban’s Dr. McCoy from the new Star Trek movies (especially with the voice). By the end we’re supposed to like Hook, but I didn’t care about him one way or the other. As for Tiger Lily, poor Rooney. The talented, rising actress has nothing but boring dialogue and ridiculous costumes, makeup and headgear to wear. It’s impossible to take anything she says or does

seriously with a frilly serving tray atop her head. I’ll give Levi Miller a pass considering he’s so young. To his credit, he isn’t annoying. There are other inexplicable moments as well, the biggest of which is the singing of Nirvana’s “Smells Like Teen Spirit” when we first meet Blackbeard. This isn’t Kurt Cobain on a soundtrack, this is the children in the mines, pirates and Blackbeard himself singing the song. It takes a while for it to register, but when it does it makes you smile. It’s fun. Then you realize the meaning of the song has no relevance here, is completely anachronistic and makes no sense at all to use. Also, Pan is rated PG and targeted toward kids – what’re the odds the little ones are going to recognize a song from 1991? And parents, if they do ask about it have fun explaining to your 5-year-old how Kurt Cobain died. Pan is no atrocity. It’s an origin story nobody asked for made by Joe Wright, a director whose films often feature creative decisions that make no sense. Remember the theatrical setting of Wright’s Anna Karenina? Ugh. Yet, it will keep the kids engaged and there are certainly worse ways to pass the time. Just don’t forget there are much better ways as well.

Pan (PG) Dir. Joe Wright; writ. Jason Fuchs; J.M. Barrie (characters); feat. Levi Miller, Hugh Jackman, Rooney Mara, Amanda Seyfried In theaters now

sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 39

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The premise behind Comedy Central’s Nathan for You doesn’t sound particularly funny. It’s about a comedian with a business background who takes ideas to small companies to try to improve them. But, when you take a gifted comedian like Nathan Fielder and a perfect grasp on the absurd and subtle, a hilarious experience emerges. By design, Fielder’s suggestions are often spectacularly bad, or at the very least entirely impractical. Some are outright ridiculous, like creating a pooflavored frozen yogurt to help a struggling store. The genius of Fielder, however, is that some suggestions, while outlandish and sometimes downright stupid, actually make sense in terms of publicity. Hooking your mechanic up to a lie-detector test to see if he is cheating you is really kind of smart. More laughs come, of course, when Fielder tests the polygraph and is interrogated about his porn-watching habits. Nathan for You wouldn’t be as successful without some luck, which Fielder and company have enjoyed in their two seasons thus far. Though the show is somewhat structured, it is mostly improvised and utilizes real businesses. During these experiences, Fielder has run into eccentric people turned recurring characters, including a ball-busting PI, a

security guard distracted by large breasts and perhaps best, a bizarre Bill Gates impersonator who not only barely strikes a resemblance to him but knows absolutely nothing about computers and is regularly put on the spot by Fielder with hilarious results. Fielder plays every idea completely straight, never breaking character. He excels at letting jokes play off him and creating uncomfortable humor. His performances are often so understated that people are clueless to his sarcasm. Adding to the character is Fielder’s portrayal of loneliness. Many segments end with the comedian uncomfortably asking business owners if they want to hang out with him. The camera lingers as his subjects awkwardly decline, fostering some gloriously squirmy moments. At its core, Nathan for You faces a similar conundrum met by the work of Sacha Baron Cohen. The more under-theradar it is, the less likely Fielder is to get recognized when filming and the easier it is to mess around with people. In order to keep that status, notoriety is sacrificed, which could lead to cancellation-worthy ratings. But Nathan for You is too brilliant to go unnoticed, and it’d be a disservice to ignore the funniest show on TV while it is still on the air. Season 3 of Nathan for You premieres on October 15 on Comedy Central.

sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 41

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FOOD

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JUST CHEESIN’ 3 Must-Try Fromage Boards Around Town JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

Don’t overthink it — beer and cheese go together like, well, beer and cheese. Do the delicious thing and check out these new boards around town and pair them with your favorite brew. BRIGID 803 S. St. Mary’s St., (210) 988-3063, brigidrestaurant. com Why You Need It: There are cheese boards and then there is THIS cheese masterpiece (below). Chris Carlson (formerly at Sandbar) orders a balanced variety of cheeses while his staff takes care of the creative plating. You’ll find four cheeses — a Chabichou French goat cheese, a caveaged sheep in the Pecorino Toscano Oro, a Délice de Bourgogne cow’s milk cheese and a rotating Jasper Hill — paired with a colorful assembly of accouterments. A splash of raspberry coulis, a spoonful of orange marmalade, a smudge of balsamic fig puree, short caramelized apple cylinders, two types of thinly sliced pears and a smattering of marigold petals all make an appearance at this cheese party. Cost: $14 Pair It With: A Blanche de Bruxelles white Belgian NECTAR WINE BAR & ALE HOUSE 214 Broadway, (210) 375-4082 | nectarsa.com Why You Need It: Nectar owners Rob and Rachel Stephens are winning over foodies, winos and craft lovers with their fromage boards. As one of the top three appetizers sold, the board is available with two, three or four types of cheeses. Take some pals and go for four. Go in the evening and work on your night cheese, but ditch the orange cheddar for curated plates that combine cheeses from Gaucho Gourmet and Antonelli’s Cheese Shop in Austin. The favorites include the Le Pommier Camembert, a cow milk’s cheese out of Herve Mons France and the Drunken Goat, a firm Spanish goat cheese flavored with Merlot. Texan cheeses also make a cameo — the Apache Blue out of Granbury Texas is their beginner blue for those who are dipping their toes into stinky cheese. Or go big and try the EWE CALF to be KIDding with cow, ewe and goat’s milk.

Snack attack! Cheeseboards for when night cheese doesn’t cut it any more.

Cost: $16/$18/$20 Pair It With: Rob pairs the Red Dragon, a semi-soft cheddar with stone ground mustard with a Sam Adams’ Fat Jack ROSELLA COFFEE CO. 203 E. Jones Ave., Suite 101, (210) 277-8574 | rosellacoffee.com Why You Need It: Reserved, but sleek plating means we can concentrate on the cheesy task at hand. The black granite plate comes with water crisps, a bowl of olives and fig chutney paired with a selection via Antonelli’s: raw goat cheddar from LaClare Farms in Wisconsin, a Blue d’Auvergne made with cow’s milk intead of sheep and Boston Post Dairy’s Gisele, a magical combo of goat and cow milks that’s washed in spiced apple cider. It’s the perfect mid-day snack, or shareable post-work dinner. Cost: $15 Pair It With: Ask the staff.

DO IT YO’SELF Adopt Some Orphans Head to Central Market and pick up the bits and pieces left over from the cheese monger’s selection. These little bundles will cost no more than a fiver, which means you can load up on a few. Don’t shy away from bleus either. Like Carlson says, “Just because a cheese smells like crap, doesn’t mean it tastes like it.” Load Up On Fixins Pick up some nuts. I’m partial to walnuts and almonds that provide that fun crunch. Go Basic With Your Crackers Water crisps, plain, what-haveyou. Keep it chill so as to not overwhelm your cheese. Elevate Your Taste Buds Pick up a jar of Taste Elevated’s (405 Hwy. 90 W., 830-538-5079) sweet and spicy mustard seeds. The Stephens use these flavor bombs for their boards. flavor@sacurrent.com

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JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

Find the People’s Nite Market at La Villita next Tuesday.

has secured at least 30 regular vendors Yes, you can always come that go outside the usual scope of what back home … but it’s great qualifies as market fodder. when returning means goodies Produce baskets ($10 for a really for hometown friends. For Valeria great mix) are curated by the pair Hernandez and Jovanna Lopez, adding from River City Produce, homemade an accessible and eclectic market was salves and fragrant soaps come via almost necessary. These days, you can Soap Addicts, and San Anto bling and shop for household goods and more at décor’s made an appearance via Sweet The People’s Nite Market. Craft Jewelry and VeryThat tiles. Hernandez, an actress and And attendees can’t go hungry at The community organizer, left San Antonio People’s Nite Market either. The women to pursue acting in LA more than 15 pair Cocina Heritage, which created a years ago. Lopez, dining and marketing new vegan tamal for the market, with manager for O’liva Healthy Local Cubanos from Ay Papi Puerto Rican Cuisine & Tasting Room, shared a truck and both meat- and veggie-filled similar story. The SA native moved plates filled with spongy injera flatbread to New York in the early 2000s with via Berbere Ethiopian Cuisine. Americorps, where she learned to “Both of us were familiar with live on a tight budget and worked on Ethiopian and we didn’t want to drive an community outreach that included hour up the road to get it from Austin,” planting gardens, working on murals said Lopez, who was introduced and establishing literacy programs. to the fare by a former beau, while “I think we connected because we Hernandez’s daughter had an Ethiopian were both depressed,” Lopez said. “I nanny when she was growing up. don’t know about LA, but when you ask “One thing we spoke about a lot was people that have moved away from New that we missed the diversity of these York, it’s like a drug that you have left bigger cities,” Hernandez said. “When behind and you’re always craving it and I was homesick, I found the other side you always want to go back in some way of 410 where I could get my threadings … I created my own little world of things and my Moroccan food. We wanted and I brought it back with me.” to include that international That means establishing a community of vendors to get The People’s cross-cultural night market held Nite Market people to know the other side 418 Villita St. every other Tuesday through of San Antonio.” (210) 901-9717 November 17. For its first 6-10pm Tue Oct. 20, flavor@sacurrent.com season at La Villita, the market Nov. 3 & 17

Wednesday, 10/14 | Pinot Noir Tasting

Come and have some fun doing a Blind, price vertical, Pinot Noir tasting. You won’t know the value of the wine so you won’t be influenced by your wallet.

Wednesday, 10/21 | Riesling Tasting

Don’t think of Riesling as a sugar bomb anymore. Come and explore this awesome varietal. We will be tasting different Rieslings from around the world.

Friday, 11/6 | Food Tasting

Taste Elevated will be here with their products for sampling. They all of our accoutrements and more that we don’t carry. Come get to know the maker of these great side dishes. Web: NectarSA.com @Nectarsat Nectar Wine Bar and Ale House Nectarwinebar

214 Broadway•NectarSa.com @NectarSAT

I! X E R O L I A K PETITE)

(GOOD AP

John the Greek’s restaurant serves food the way mom used to make it for over 25 years and will continue to evolve and expand.

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210.403.0565 • San Pedro @ Thousand Oaks

argentinian beer

8142 BROADWAY ST• SAN ANTONIO, TX 78209 • (210) 930-9393 • betosaltmex.com

Authentic Thai Cuisine

Open 7 Days a Week Thank you,

San Antonio for voting

for us !

226 W Bitters Rd #124 • (210) 545-3354 • saebthainoodlesa.com

Smokey Mo’s Bar-B-Q

We Cater! No Order is too big!

TAMALES BARBACOA TACOS ENCHILADAS BREAKFAST

Spring Branch/Bulverde • (830) 438-8330 19851 Hwy 46 W (Just east of 281 on Hwy 46) Spring Branch/Bulverde, TX 78070

San Antonio • (210) 481-3835 20210 Stone Oak Pkwy (near Stone Oak & Evans) San Antonio, TX 78258 San Antonio • (210) 494-9090 22106 Bulverde Rd (Corner of Evans & Bulverde) San Antonio, TX 78259

NEW R E D NT UN E M E G MANA

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Boerne • (830) 331-2633 1685 River Road (The Ranch at Cibolo Creek) Boerne, TX 78006

www.SmokeyMosBBQ.com

sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 45

Expires 10/21/2015

Dine-In • Carryout • Catering

Chicago Bagel& Deli

Support your local longest established family owned bagel shop in

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If your bagel is not boiled, its just a roll with a hole.

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Don t forget to like us on 46 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

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FOOD

CULINARY CALENDAR

6 Ways to Get Your Drink/Grub on This Week JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

Thursday, October 15

Mole Throwdown: The Centro Cultural Aztlan is packing in all the moles you can taste for its seventh annual culinary fundraiser. Sample more than 25 varieties from across regions of Mexico, paired with cold beer and more. The event will also include a silent art auction so come prepared to take a few prints home. $40, 6pm, 1800 Fredericksburg Road, Suite 103, (210) 432-1896, centroaztlan.org.

Can’t get away?

Opa!

Craft Beer Tasting: The Hangar Bar & Grill is acquiescing to your pumpkin beer cravings with a Halloween-themed tasting. Stop in for a dozen pumpkin-filled brews from Utah Brewer’s Cooperative, No Label Brewery, Harpoon Brewery, Alaskan and Southern Tier Brewing. Admission includes 12 samples, light snacks and a raffle ticket for door prizes. $5, 7-9pm, 8203 Broadway, (210) 824-2700, facebook.com/thehangarsa.

Order through Bike Waiter for delivery from our Downtown location!

San Antonio’s Best Turkish Grill

FREE HOUSE SALAD WITH MIXED GRILL

for $3 off of $15+ orders!

Locations

OPEN 11AM-10PM EVERYDAY

5238 De Zavala Rd.SA,TX 78249 315 E. Commerce st #102 SA,TX 78205

(LOCATED BEHIND NORTHSTAR MALL)

888 935 2412 • kevasmoothie.com

8507 McCullough #B13 • 210-399-1645

Friday, October 16

Use coupon code: GETKEVA

Holiday Olé Market: The Junior League of San Antonio kicks off its weekendlong shopping fundraiser at the Freeman Coliseum and Expo Hall this Friday. The market includes home décor and special events including a brunch with Heloise ($45, 9:30-11:30 a.m. Friday), Girl’s Night Out Party at the Palace of Versailles ($45, 6-9 p.m. Saturday) and mixology class with Paramour bar manager Chris Ware ($30, 11 a.m.-1 p.m. Sunday). Prices vary, 10am-6pm Saturday, 10am-9pm Saturday, 11 am-4pm Sunday; 3201 E. Houston St., (210) 225-1861, jlsa.org. Greek FUNstival: I don’t know about y’all but I could eat baklava for days. Flaky phyllo layers, rose water-tinged honey and crunchy nuts should be a part of your diet while at the 55th annual Greek FUNstival at St. Sophia Greek Orthodox Church. Stop by for plate smashing, kebabs and more. $3, 6-11pm Friday, noon-11pm Saturday, noon-6pm Sunday; 2504 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 735-5051, stsophiagoc.org/funstival.

Saturday, October 17

San Antonio Beer Festival: Celebrate 10 year’s worth of excellent porters, stouts, pilsners, ales, wheat, Belgians, ciders and lager (more than 250 total) with your favorite alt-weekly. A portion of the proceeds will benefit the San Antonio Food Bank so your drinking won’t be for not. Don’t forget your lawn chairs and get ready to enjoy a crisp fall day at Maverick Park. $35-$80, 1:30-6:30pm, 1000 Broadway, sanantoniobeerfestival.com. Pre-release Party: Dom’s Chop Salsa is showcasing its first batch of grilled and seasoned salsa with a spicy bash. The Cinderleaf will perform as part of their 20th anniversary celebration at Rebar, there will be plenty of salsa sampling to go around and attendees will get a chance to sign up for the first-ever Salsa-as-a-Service delivery shipping model. No cover, 7pm-2am, 8134 Broadway, facebook.com/ chopsalsa. Send food- and booze-related events to flavor@sacurrent.com.

210.829.7345 | 1146 AUSTIN HIGHWAY SAN ANTONIO, TX 78209 | TONGSTHAI.COM

eet r st e h t g Featurin ds of Thailand foo

boba-ology boba tea • asian fusion foods • fresh juice 7220 Louis Pasteur Dr. # 125 210.854.4771 now hiring. apply in-store sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 47

af es RESTAURANT & BAR

Daily Lunch Specials Happy Hour 11a-6p Tue-Fri & 9p-11p dining • Dancing • Entertainment

NEW ERS! OWN

FOOD

FLAVOR FILE

More Oktoberfest Celebrations and Spooky Quizzes JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

1039 NE Loop 410 (Between Nacogdoches & Broadway) • 210.826.7118 www.RafflesRestaurantandBar.com

HOOKAH & BUBBLE TEA NOW HIRING. PLEASE APPLY IN-STORE 6565 BABCOCK RD STE. #23 (AT DE ZAVALA) 210.384.2974

F R E S H . L O C A L . S C R AT C H K I T C H E N

Who needs more pretzels and polka?

Oh, did you put away your lederhosen? Fool. The Oktoberfest parties continue into this weekend (and that should be it, no?) with oompah jams and authentic Bavarian food. The DoSeum (2800 Broadway, 210-2124453) kicks off the weekend with its third adults-only party since opening its doors this summer. The Oktoberfest-themed ReDo Recess includes access to the 100,000-square-foot museum, along with beer-making demos and brewer chats. Snack on sausage wraps from Kiolbassa and beer floats by The House Boozy Ice Cream and Brews. Tickets ($15) are available at thedoseum.org. The second annual Oktoberfest Celebration at the Hyatt Regency Hill Country Resort and Spa (9800 Hyatt Resort Drive, 210-767-7999) will go down on October 17 from 4-8 p.m. with access to the hotel’s pools and waterparks. Admission also includes food, entertainment, one drink ticket and parking. A cash bar will be available for additional German and Texas craft brews. Breakfast options are expanding across the city (and not just with all-day breakfast at McDonald’s). Orderup (999 E. Basse Road, Suite 193, 210-824-9600) launched a new breakfast menu served until 11 a.m. on weekdays and noon on weekends with scratch-made cinnamon rolls, four different breakfast pizzas, breakfast tacos and five breakfast bagelburgers along with smoothies, coffee and parfaits. The guys at Mezcalería Mixtli (5313 McCullough Ave., 856-630-5142) are hosting their fellow Break Fast & Launch cohort, Bombay Salsa Co., for a takeover on Sunday, October 25. From 5 p.m. to midnight, stop by for Indian-Mexican fusion including chicken papdum tacos, masala chaat and more. Halloween is coming up fast. On Wednesday, October 28, Geeks Who Drink will host “Stupid Gets You Killed: A Walking Dead Quiz” at the Lion & Rose British Restaurant & Pub Forum location (8211 Agora Pkwy., #112). Brush up your chops — there’s a ton of characters that have gone the way of the zombie. Teams must be no bigger than six members and each player must fork over a $5 admission charge. Finally, Freetail Taproom (2000 S. Presa St., 210-625-6000) will screen Tucker & Dale vs. Evil, a cult classic starring Tyler Labine and El Paso native Alan Tudyk, which clocks in at 84 percent on Rotten Tomatoes. Stop in on Thursday, October 29 at 8:30 p.m. for a costume contest and La Muerta prizes. flavor@sacurrent.com

HOURS: 11AM-10PM • 6462 N New Braunf els • 210-997-0193 • flairmexicanstreetfood.c om 48 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

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sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 49

(512) Brewing Company, Texas Pale American Pale Ale 5.8% IPA American IPA 7% Whiskey Barrel Aged Double Pecan Porter Imperial 8.2% CoCo Cerise American Porter 7% Pecan Porter American Porter 6.8% ALT Altbier 6% Adelbert’s Brewery, Texas Black Rhino Dark Ale 6% The Traveler Belgian IPA 7% Tripel B Belgian Tripel 9.3% Naked Nun Witbier 5.8% Alamo Beer Co., Texas German Pale Ale American Pale Ale 5.2% Pilsner German Pilsner 5.1% Oktoberfest Oktoberfest | Festbier | Marzen 5.8% Golden Ale Golden Ale 4.75% Blue Star Brewing Co., Texas Texican Lager 4% Flying Pig EPA 5% Wheathead Wheat Beer 5.2% Cinco Peso Pale Ale Pale Ale 5% Green Tractor IPA IPA 6.5% Spire Stout Oatmeal Stout 5.3% Boerne Brewery Willy’s, Texas ESB Extra Special | Strong Bitter 5.2% Denim-Hosen Kölsch 5.0% Branchline Brewing Co., Texas Menger 32 (Cask) Pumpkin Ale 7.5% Evil Owl American Amber | Red Ale 5.2% Woodcutter Rye IPA American IPA 6.5% Menger 32 Pumpkin Ale Pumpkin Beer 7.5% BS Brewing, Texas College Chronic Red Ale 7.5% Pecan Ale with Honey Braggot 6.2% Punkmin Latte Milk Stout Milk Stout 8.4% 1888 Whitechapel Dark English Strong Ale Busted Sandal Brewing, , Texas El Gourdo Pumpkin Porter Pumpkin Beer 6.5% 210 Ale American Blonde Ale 6.1% El Robusto Porter Porter 7% Fire Pit Wit Witbier 5% La Fitra Porter Circle Brewing,, Texas Blur Texas Hefe Hefeweizen 4.6% Alibi Blonde Blonde Ale 4.3% Envy Amber English Style Amber Ale 4.8% Hop Overboard Session IPA Session IPA 4.5% Fanny Pack Kölsch 4.8% Tuxedo Tshirt Black IPA Black IPA 5.1% Tuxedo Tshirt Black IPA (Cask) 5.1%

50 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

Deep Ellum Brewing Co., Texas American IPA 7% , Texas Blonde Blonde Ale 5.2% Oak Cliff Coffee Ale American Brown Ale 7.5% Dream Crusher Double IPA Imperial | Double IPA 8.5% Freetail, Texas Soul Doubt, Texas IPA American IPA 6% Witicus Double Rye Wit Witbier 8.2% Bat Outta Helles Lager 4.2% Rye Wit Witbier 4.2% Oktoberfiesta Oktoberfest | Fest Beer | Marzen 5.3% Original American Amber | Red Ale 6.8% Goliad Brewing Company, Texas Golden Ale | Blonde Ale 5.2% Presidio La Bahia Black Hefeweizen Dunkelweizen 4.7% Redfish IPA American IPA 6% Granary ‘Cue & Brew, Texas Brown Ale Brown Ale 7% Strawberry Berliner Beliner Weisse 3.4% Socrates Coffee IPA 6.5% Grapevine Craft Brewery, Texas Sir William’s English Brown Ale 4.9% HopFest United IPA American IPA 6.5% Monarch American Pale Wheat Ale 4.3% Guadalupe Brewing , Texas Texas Honey Ale American Blonde Ale 7.3% Scotch Ale Scotch Ale | Wee Heavy 8.2% Pumpkin Style Texas Honey Ale American Ale 7% Guns & Oil Brewery, Texas Maverick Lager North American Adjunct Lager 4.6% Independence Brewing Co., Texas Stash IPA American IPA 7% Reaper Madness Black IPA | Cascadian Dark Ale 6% Amber American Amber | Red Ale 4.8% Power & Light Pale Ale American Pale Ale 5.5% Stash American IPA 7% Convict Hill Oatmeal Stout 8.5% Redbud Berliner Weisse Berliner Weisse 4.2% Infamous Brewing, Texas Sweep the Leg - Peanut Butter Stout American Stout 7% Hijack Cream Ale 5.5% Pumpkin Pecan Massacre Porter 7.5% Karbach Brewing Co., Texas Sympathy for the Lager Vienna Lager 4.9% Weekend Warrior American Pale Ale 5.5% Weisse Versa Wheat Witbier 5.2% Mother in Lager Dunkel Munich Lager 5.8% Hopadillo IPA American IPA 6.6% Leprechaun Premium Hard Cider , Texas Golden Cider 6.9% Pomegranate Cider 6.9%

Middleton Brewing, Texas Galena Belgian Dubbel 7.6% Bobcat Red American Amber | Red Ale 7% Pepperhead IPA American IPA w|Jalapeno 8% Black Lab Porter Robust Porter 6.8% No Label Brewing, Texas El Hefe Hefeweizen 5.6% Nightmare on 1st Street Pumpkin | Yam Beer 9.3% Ridgeback American Amber 5% Pedernales Brewing Co., Texas Classic Hefeweizen Hefeweizen 5.2% Lobo Negro Dunkel 5.5% Lobo Texas Lager Pale Lager 5% Pedernales Classic IPA American IPA 6% Robert Earl Keen Honey Pils German Pilsner 5% Rahr & Sons Brewing Company, Texas Texas Red American Amber | Red Lager 5% Rahr’s Blonde Helles Lager 5% Ranger Creek Brewing & Distilling, Texas Special Firkin TBD Sunday Morning Coming Down British Strong Ale with Coffee Small Batch Series No. 11 Apricot Sour 8.4% Red Headed Stranger American IPA 6.3% Purple Rhine Berliner Weisse 5.7% OPA (Oatmeal Pale Ale) American Pale Ale with Oats 5.8% Love Struck Hefe Hefeweizen 5.4% Real Ale Brewing Co., Texas Brewhouse Brown Ale English Brown Ale 5.4% Real Ale Firemans #4 Golden Ale | Blonde Ale 5.1% Devils Backbone Three Ridges Belgian Style Triple Abbey Tripel 6.5% Hans’ Pils German Pilsner 5.3% Lost Gold IPA American IPA 6.6% Rogness Brewing, Texas Thorhildur Belgian-Style Quad 10.30% Taxon Texas Brown Ale 7.6% Joie d’Ete Lemon|Lavendar Saison 6.1% Yogi Chai Amber 5.2% Vinton Blonde 5.3% Ost Porter 6.1% Save The World Brewing Company, Texas Agnus Dei Witbier 5.7% Froctum Bonum Saison 7.2% Southerleigh, Texas Gold Export Texas Uncommon Slang Firkin Southern Star Brewing Company, Texas Buried Hatchet Stout 8.25% Bombshell Blonde American Blonde Ale 5.25%

Spoetzel Brewery, Texas Shiner White Wing Witbier 4.7% Shiner Wicked Ram IPA American IPA 6% Shiner Holiday Cheer Dunkelweizen 5.4% St. Arnold Brewery Oktoberfest | Fest Beer | Marzen 6% Santo Black Kölsch 4.9% Amber Ale American Amber | Red Ale 5.5% Lawnmower Kölsch 4.9% Weedwacker Kölsch 4.9% Twisted X Brewing Co., Texas Chupahopra American IPA 7.5 Cow Creek Vienna Lager 5.4% Señor Viejo Schwarzbier 8.2% Twisted X Premium North American Adjunct Lager 5.1% Fuego Chili Beer 6.5% Uncle Billy’s Brew & Cue ,Texas Barton Springs Pale Ale 6.6% Green Room American IPA Gypsy Porter 7.0% Franconia Brewing Company, Texas Franconia Kölsch 4.8% Solid Rock Brewing, Texas Cornerstone Cream Ale 5.4%

craft select brews Abbaye de Leffe, Belgium Leffe Blonde Belgian Blonde Golden 6.6% Abita Brewing Co., Louisiana Abita Andygator Maibock|Helles Bock 8% Wrought Iron IPA American IPA 6.9% Purple Haze Fruit Beer 4.2% Turbodog Ale English Brown Ale 5.6% Alaskan Brewing Co., Alaska White Witbier 5.3% Freeride American Pale Ale 5.3% American IPA 6.2% Amber Altbier 5.3% Angry Orchard Cider Company, Ohio Crisp Apple Cider 5% Anheuser-Busch Bud, Missouri Light American Light Lager 4.2% Bud Light Lime American Light Lager 4.2% Budweiser North American Adjunct Lager 5% Johnny Appleseed Cider Cider 5.5% Michelob ULTRA American Light Lager 4.2% ZiegenBock Amber American Amber | Red Ale 4.9% Ballast Point Brewing Co., California Sculpin IPA American IPA 7% Dead Ringer Oktoberfest | Festbier | Marzen 6% Pumpkin Down Pumpkin | Yam Beer 5.8% Bass Brewers, United Kingdom English Pale Ale 5% Bavaria Browerij Holland Import, Netherlands Pale Lager 4.8% Bavik Bavik, Belgium Premium Pilsner Pilsner 5.2% Petrus 50/50 Sour 7.9% Big Sky Brewing, Montana IPA American IPA 6.2% Moose Drool Brown Ale AmericanBrown Ale 5.1% Birra Moretti, Italy Pale Lager 4.6% Bitburger Braugruppe, Germany Premium German Pilsner 4.8% Blue Moon Brewing Co., Colorado Harvest Pumpkin Beer 5.7% White IPA White IPA 5.9% Belgian White Witbier 5.4% Cinnamon Horchata Ale Herbed | Spiced Beer 5.5% Boddington’s Brewery, United Kingdom Pub Ale English Bitter 4.7% Boston Beer Company, Massachusetts Samuel Adams Boston Lager Amber Lager | Vienna 4.9% Samuel Adams Oktoberfest | Fest Beer | Marzen 5.3% Samuel Adams Rebel IPA American IPA 6.5% Samuel Adams Fat Jack Double Pumpkin Ale 8.5% Boulevard Brewing Co., Missouri The Calling Imperial | Double IPA 8.5% Tank 7 Saison | Farm House Ale 8.5% Bob’s - 47 Oktoberfest | Fest Beer | Marzen 5.8% Brasseries Kronenbourg, France 1664 Blanc Witbier 5% 664 Euro Lager 5% France

Breckenridge Brewery, Colorado Breck IPA American IPA 6.3% Vanilla Porter American Porter 4.7% Autumn Ale Old Ale 6.7% Agave Wheat American Pale Wheat Ale 4.2% Brouwerij van Hoegaarden, Belgium Blanche Witbier 4.9% Carlsberg Group, Denmark Carlsberg Pilsner 5% Compania Cervecera Del Sur, Peru Golden Lager 5.0% Peru Coors Brewing Co., Colorado Coors Banquet North American Adjunct Lager 5% Coors Light American Light Lager 4.2% Corona Modelo S.A. de C.V., Mexico Corona Extra (Draught) North American Adjunct Lager 4.6% Modelo Especial Pilsner 4.5% Negra Modelo Vienna Lager 5.3% Victoria Vienna Lager 4% Crispin Cider Company, California Crispin Original Cider 5% Crispin Pacific Pear Perry 4.5% Deschutes Brewery, Oregon Black Butte XXVII Imperial | Double Porter 11% Black Butte Porter American Porter 5.2% Fresh Squeezed IPA American IPA 6.4% Pinedrops IPA American IPA 6.5% Dogfish Head, Delaware 90 Minute IPA Imperial | Double IPA 9% Indian Brown Ale American Brown Ale 7.2% Palo Santo Marron Imperial | Double Brown Ale 12% Sixty One Minute American IPA 6.5% Epic Brewing Co., Utah Escape to Colorado American IPA 6.2% Brainless on Peaches Fruit Beer 11% Hopulent IPA (Nitro) American IPA 8.8% Firestone Walker , California Union Jack IPA American IPA 7.5% Pale Ale 31 American Pale Ale 4.9% DBA (Double Barrel Ale) English Pale Ale 5% Founders Brewing Company, Michigan Founders All Day IPA American IPA 4.7% Goose Island Beer Co., Illinois The Ogden Belgian Tripel 9% Honkers Ale Extra Special | Strong Bitter 4.3% Sofie Saison | Farm House Ale 6.5% Autumn Ale American Amber | Red Ale 6.7% Goose IPA English IPA 5.9% 312 Urban Wheat Ale American Pale Wheat Ale 4.2% Guinness, Ireland Blonde American Lager Blonde Lager 5% Nitro IPA English IPA 5.8% Harpoon Brewery, Massachusetts UFO White Witbier 4.8% American IPA 5.9% Imperial Pumpkin Pumpkin Beer 10.5% Take 5 Session IPA Session IPA 4.3% Jacob Leinenkugel Brewing Co., Wisconsin Oktoberfest | Fest Beer | Marzen 5.1%

Leinenkugel Big Eddy Harvest Patch Shandy Pumpkin Beer 4.2% Grapefruit Shandy Radler 4.2% Kirin Brewery Company, Japan Ichiban Pale Lager 5% Kona, Hawaii Big Wave Golden Ale 4.4% Fire Rock American Pale Ale 6% Köstritzer Schwarzbierbrauereir, Germany Schwarzbier 4.8% Germany Lagunitas Brewing Co., California American IPA 6.2% DayTime Fractional IPA Session IPA 4.7% Hop Stoopid Imperial | Double IPA 8% Imperial Pils Imperial | Double Pilsner 8.6% Lazy Magnolia Brewing Co., Massachusetts Southern Pecan English Brown Ale 4.5% Left Hand Brewing Company, Colorado Left Hand Milk Stout Milk | Sweet Stout 6% Magic Hat Brewing Co., Vermont #9 American Pale Ale 5.1% Margaritaville Brewing Co., Missouri Landshark Lager North American Adjunct Lager 4.7% Miller Brewing Co., Wisconsin Smith & Forge Hard Cider Cider 6% Miller Lite M American Light Lager 4.2% Miller High Life North American Adjunct Lager 5.9% Miller Fortune Malt Liquor 6.9% Nebraska Brewing Co., Nebraska EOS Hefeweizen Hefeweizen 5.2% IPA American IPA 6.9% New Beglium, Colorado Slow Ride Session IPA 4.5% Fat Tire Ale American Amber | Red Ale 5.2% Accumulation White IPA 6.2% Snapshot American Pale Wheat Ale 5% Odell Brewing Co., Colorado 90 Shilling 5.3% Odell IPA 7.0% Isolation Ale 6.0% Mountain Standard Double Back IPA 9.5% Paulaner Gruppe, Germany Hefe - Weisse Bier Hefewiezen 5.5% Oktoberfest Oktober Fest | Fest Beer | Marzen 5.8% Pyramid Brewerie, Washington Hefeweizen 5.2% Quality Brewers, Tennessee Frio Light Pale Lager 4% Fria Rita Gold Margarita Malt Fria Rita Strawberry Margarita Malt Miller Brewing Co., Wisconsin Redd’s Apple Ale Fruit Beer 5% Redd’s Green Apple Ale Fruit Beer 5% Redd’s Strawberry Ale Fruit Beer 5% Redd’s Wicked Black Cherry Fruit Beer 5% Oskar Blues Brewery Old Chub Scotch Ale 8% Redhook Brewery, Washington Out of Your Gourd Pumpkin Porter | Yam Beer 5.8% Rio Grande and Sierra Blanca Brewing Co., New Mexico Alien Amber American Amber | Red Ale 5.2% Rogue Ales, Newport, Oregon Hazelnut Brown Nectar American Brown Ale 6.2% Sapporo Breweries, Japan Sapporo Premium Japanese Rice Lager 5% Ship Yard Brewing Company, Maine Sea Dog Blueberry Fruit Beer 4.7% Ship Yard Monkeyfist IPA 6.9%

Shock Top Brewing Company, Missouri Spiced Pumpkin Pumpkin | Yam Beer 5.2% Pretzel Witbier 5.2% Sierra Nevada Brewing Co., California Pale Ale American Pale Ale 5.6% Flip Side American IPA 6.1% Six Point Brewing Co., New York The Crisp German Pilsner 6.4% Small Town Brewery. Illinois Not Your Father’s Root Beer Root Beer 5.9% Southern Tier Brewing Co., New York 2x IPA Imperial | Double IPA 8.2% Imperial, New York Staatliches Hofbräu Haus, Germany München Hofbrau Original Helles Lager 5.1% Stella Artois Stella, Belgium Euro Lager 5.2% Stella Artois Cidre Cider 4.5% Stone Brewing Co., California Ruination Double IPA 2.0 | Imperial IPA 8.5% Stone Pale Ale 2.0 American Pale Ale 6% Stone Enjoy By IPA American Double | Imperial IPA 9.4% Stone IPA (India Pale Ale) American IPA 6.9% Sweetwater, Georgia 420 Extra Pale Ale American Pale Ale 5.7% Take Two Pils German Pilsner 5.5% IPA American IPA 6.3% Traveler Beer Co., Vermont Elusive Traveler Grapefruit Shandy American Pale Wheat Ale 4.4% Jack-O-Traveler Shandy Pumpkin | Yam Beer 4.4% Upslope Brewing Company, Colorado Upslope Craft Lage American Pale Ale 4.8% Imperial IPA Imperial IPA | American Double 10% Upslope Pale Ale American Pale Ale 5.8% Upslope Brown Ale American Brown Ale 6.7% Warsteiner, Germany Premium Dunkel, Dunkel Munich Lager 4.8% Utah Brewers Cooperative, Utah Squatters Hop Rising Double IPA | Imperial IPA 9% Wasatch Apricot Hefeweizen Fruit Beer 4% Widmer Brothers Brewing, Oregon Hefeweizen 4.9% William K. Busch Brewing Company, Missouri Kraftig Light American Light Lager 4.2% Kraftig Lager Pale Lager 4.6% Woodchuck Cidery, Vermont Granny Smith Hard Cider 5% Pear Hard Cider 4% Amber Hard Cider 5%

h-e-b WINE garden

Gloria Ferrer Carneros, California Zuccotti Frizecco D’Italia, Italy Wine Moscato 10.5% 19 Crimes, Australia Cabernet 13% • Beers subject to change

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SHOW OFF SOME

MAD HOPS In the mood for something stout? Turn to our beer section. With more than 350 varieties of domestic and imported beers, many from microbreweries from Texas only available in Central Market, you’re invited to take one down and pass it around. Plus, the new Central Market Growler Bar is now open and offering even more craft beers from some of your favorite breweries. Choose from a dozen selections every day.

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LIVE MUSIC Sunday

LOCATION

20626 Stone Oak Pkwy San Antonio, Texas 78258 sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 67

SHERLOCK’S BAKER ST. PUB & GRILL

NEW FOOD. NEW HANDCRAFTED COCKTAILS. SAME GREAT LOCAL BREWS. Full Menu until 2 a.m. Located in Park Oaks Shopping Center 16620 US 281 N 210.572.9307 sherlockspub.com 68 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

1526 ROOSEVELT AVE 210.532.4113

POOL • DARTS • PING PONG ENJOY OUR PATIO AREA

200 10141 Wurzbach, San Antonio, Texas 78230 • (210) 877-2100 wurzbachicehouse.com • Corner of Ironside and Wurzbach

NIGHTLIFE

GO-GO GADGET 5 beer gadgets you need JESSICA ELIZARRARAS/@JESSELIZARRARAS

WEEKLY CALENDAR Monday Madness NFL Football

Tipsy Tuesday

College Night/Karaoke Whether they’re pure novelties or fully functioning gadgetry, we found a few gems that’ll keep your brew game strong. Condensation is the bane of my existence. True story. I hate the god-awful feeling of crappy beer label sticker glue as it peels off the bottle due to my icy cold beer being exposed to scorching South Texas temperatures. The guys at Freaker, a company based out of North Carolina, know condensation sucks and that you have to keep your beer cool. They manufacture a knit koozie that insulates and keeps your hands dry. For $10.95 at Leighelena at the Pearl (303 Pearl Pkwy., Suite 101, 210-224-6666), the Freaker can be found bearing several styles, but we’re prone to this Lone Star rendition (football laces are a close second). Also found at Leighelena, which honestly has just about every novelty gift you could ever want, was The Red Cup Drink Kooler ($10.95). I won’t talk this one up much more than I need to. It’s a fun riff on a Red Solo Cup that made me chuckle. The patent-pending product is made with a stress foam-like

material. Keep it around for when you need to relive those collegiate nights. You’ll need a pair of sunnies for all your tailgating this football season. The guys at Big Hops Growler Station (multiple locations) have you covered with their lime green Ray-Ban-esque shades that double as bottle openers. Pick some up before they’re gone because we all need cheap shades ($8), and a church key. This one’s for the beer drinker with a love of all things Bexar County. The Bexar MiiR Growler ($59.99 through bexargoods.com) will keep your Freetail Soul Doubt chilly long after it’s been filled. The double-wall vacuum and stainless steel shell will keep liquids cold for more than 24 hours. Finally, Etsy, cycling and beer aficionados should visit Pedal Happy Design’s store. Their sleek bicycle mounted leather growler carrier with stainless steel growler lite comes in at $35 and is available in dark brown, light brown, mahogany (to match your leather-bound books!) and black.

Wednesday

Hard Working Women Wednesday

Thunder Thursday Bikers Welcomed, Live Music by: Hitlist

Friday Night Party Featuring DJ

Rockin Saturday Night Live Music by Darringer

Sunday Night Football NFL TICKET

7905 BANDERA RD. SA,TX | 210.455.3037 | OVERBARANDGRILL.COM

flavor@sacurrent.com sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 69

Every 3rd Tuesday

MAY - OCTOBER | 7p-10p

In the heart of SAN ANTONIO

October 20 PoP Pistol Ochtahedron

Black Market Club

Arneson River Theatre at The Shops of La Villita | 418 Villita Street

70 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

NIGHTLIFE

The Mad Pecker Is Friendlier than Name Suggests KEVIN FEMMEL

San Antonio’s craft beer scene has exploded in recent years. If you haven’t noticed you’re likely loyal to big brand beers or you’ve been living under a rock. Or perhaps, you’ve just been living on the far West Side of town, where spots that serve thirsty craft beer enthusiasts are as patchy as a teenager’s beard. Mad Pecker Brewery Company “tempt[s] the taste of those willing to try,” and due to its location on 6025 Tezel Road, it will need to convert locals to succeed. If you’re like me and live 10 minutes from a Freetail or Big Hops, driving 20 plus minutes sounds like a groan-inducing task. Mad Pecker is surrounded by road construction, dim street lighting and its entrance faces Timber Path, not Tezel Road, making your first trip there a bit of an adventure. Mercifully, the beer selection justifies the trip even if it lacks anything new. Its website describes the “Mad Pecker” character as “shunned by society” and sent away to “live in solitude,” which can easily describe the location. Inside and out, the Pecker looks more like a neighborhood bar than most of its counterparts. It certainly has a more approachable vibe for those unacquainted with the craft scene and boasts a friendly staff. Don’t let my description fool you, it’s a stylish setting for a night of drinking. A classy-looking, eye-catching chandelier greets you next to the bar, with the entire place decked out in red, black and gold. Not to mention a Chicago Cubs flag hung on the entrance wall, which

KEVIN FEMMEL

BREWS IN THE ‘BURBS

indicates to me that the Mad Pecker’s owner must be after my heart. I started out with their poutine fries and the Wick For Brains Pumpkin Ale from Nebraska Brewing Company, both good choices that helped pass time during a longish wait for one of the artisan pizzas. Patrons will debate whether Pecker’s take on pizza stands up to Freetail’s proven selection, but the two are different enough to warrant giving the Mad Pecker a shot. I ordered the Hawaiian and veggie pizzas, both filled with fresh toppings and a crispy crust that tastes homemade in all the right ways. A 12-inch pizza will set you back $8 and is more than enough to satisfy your hunger. If you’re reading this you’ve probably said to yourself, “I’m not driving past Ingram unless they’ve got a good beer selection.” Well, all of your favorites are here: Alamo, Branchline, Freetail, Guadalupe, Independence, Live Oak, Ranger Creek, Stone and Real Ale. Their list of breweries from the Lone Star State just keeps going, with Texas beers dominating the tap list. You certainly get a wider selection of beer with your pizza than you would get at Freetail, since the Mad Pecker doesn’t have any original brews to promote, yet. It is hard to not compare the Mad Pecker to all of its competitors, due to the increase of craft beer bars that offer food in SA. The atmosphere is friendlier and more easy-going than other bars, and the selection of brews is deep, varied and highlights many of Texas’ best breweries. Many of Mad Pecker’s brews are priced a bit higher than the competition, which is likely due to there not being a whole lot of drinking and dining options close to it. Competition is a good thing and with San Antonio’s craft beer scene expanding more than ever, random neighborhood bars like the Mad Pecker will start popping up. Mad Pecker Brewing Company is proof that there is demand for craft beer bars in parts of town you wouldn’t have expected. With tasty pizza and an extensive list of brews, the Mad Pecker definitely deserves a spot in your pub rotation. You’ll just have to spend a bit more on gas and beer if you don’t live nearby.

Pizza and a chill space — what more do you want?

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DDLM_Full_AD_Current_Print.pdf

10/8/15

CMY

72 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

8:05 PM

WORLD CLASS SPECIAL EFFECT ARTIST SERGIO GUERRA BRINGS HIS TALENTS TO SAN ANTONIO’S NEWEST HALLOWEEN ATTRACTION - BIO-HAZARD AT CITY BASE

COMING SOON! citybasecinema.com

n o w p l ay i n g !

CITY BASE WEST SHOPPING CENTER SE MILITARY & NEW BRAUNFELS AVE. • 210.531.3000 • CITYBASECINEMA.COM sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 73

74 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

NIGHTLIFE

KEEPING TABS

Happy Hour Specials

Beer Cocktails: Because Booze and Brews Should Be Friends RON BECHTOL It all began — and this is pure speculation — with the boilermaker, that everyman’s after-work combo of beer and a shot. From there, it seems entirely possible that, as in fashion, the trickle-up process began its work: first, we get fancier combinations of suds and tipple, such as an Imperial Stout chased by Fernet-Branca, then the urge to combine the two in the same glass becomes overwhelming. However this actually happened, today’s ‘tenders are finding new ways to put the brewer and the distiller in bed together. Mashups of the Mexican bulldog or Dos-a-rita sort are entirely too unnatural to be considered here. Some legitimate pairings are more like marriages of convenience in that the beer doesn’t get down with the spirit but is floated on top in the way that Champagne tops a French 75. Upping the ante on this concept, Stephan Mendez, Jeret Peña’s Boulevardier Group Beverage Manager, now frequently found at The Last Word, created this drink while at 1919 (and also trotted it out at Esquire and the Blue Box). He calls it The Almost Collins:

Shake with ice, strain into a Collins glass filled with ice, top off with a hoppy IPA beer and garnish with a slab of grapefruit peel.

Taking a different approach, Nick Kenna, formerly at Dorcol but now managing much of Steve Mahoney’s expanding empire, uses beers, boiled down with sugars and spices, in concentrated syrup form for drinks such as Blue Box’s What the Hefe? in which he uses Live Oak Hefeweizen with cardamom and banana. The Irish Old Fashioned at Francis Bogside is another with Guinness Extra Stout reduced with demerara sugar added to Irish whiskey with orange bitters. Sprinkled throughout the cocktail

1 3 75 AU ST I N H W Y SA N A N TO N I O, T E X A S ( 2 1 0) 4 67 - 5 5 6 5 The Irish Old Fashioned at Francis Bogside

menu at The Hoppy Monk on 1604, the intrepid investigator can find a schoonerload of drinks bolstered with beer — some also with syrup reductions. But there are also a few with deconstructed beer components. Ricardo Ruiz, a manager who came to San Antonio from the original location in El Paso, says HM’s cocktails are a collaborative effort and that hops tinctures (powerful when tasted straight, but judiciously dispensed with an eye dropper) are among the ordinance in their arsenal. You’ll find this, and house IPA syrup, in Pliny’s Daiquiri with white rum and thyme. If you order it, check out the beautiful bubble structure the beer gives the drink. The bubbly build happens because, unlike many, Ruiz is not afraid to put beer straight into the shaking tin. “You have to be careful as it is carbonated,” he says — and I admit that I was hoping for an explosion. But the only fireworks were in the glass. Ruiz’s Pale Horse, with a peaty scotch and a pilsner, was unexpectedly cinnamon-and-clove spicy. His Cemetery Gates, with barrel-aged IPA and gin, moved beer to the front and the De Peche Mode, employs Dorcol’s Kinsman rakia and a Belgian peach lambic, which counters the drink’s sweetness with a touch bitterness. Ruiz is continuing to experiment with beer-booze interactions, lately with some of his nitrogen-delivered taps. Expect smaller bubbles, a creamier texture … beer nerds and booze hounds alike will find common ground here.

There can only be ONE!

THE GAME IS ALWAYS ON! GAME-TIME DRINK SPECIALS!

ME SEE US CO

THE ALMOST COLLINS: 1 ½ ounce ½ ounce grapefruit juice gin ½ ounce Cynar ½ ounce honey

BAR

Breakfast, Lunch, Dinner & everything in-between! FULL BAR OPENS AT 7AM! Sun: 11 am - 2 am | Mon-Sat: 7 am - 2 am | 5562 Fredericksburg Rd. In the Medical Center

sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 75

76 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

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Esta Semana Wed Oct 14th 8pm Ruben V

Charlie Brown’s Neighborhood Bar & Grill

Thurs Oct 15th

6.3pm Jonathan Garcia 9pm Sarah y Lod Dos Hermanos

Fri Oct 16th

7pmWest Kings Highway 9.3pm Snowbyrd

Join Us for Happy Hour Mon-Fri 2pm-6pm Specials Daily

Sat Oct 17th

6.3pm JD Duarte 9pm Bongo Katz go to sanchosmx.com for full listings

s a m y na canti

Karaoke • Trivia Live Music

628 Jackson St | 210-320-1840

The Vaping Experts. Come see us.

Experience it for yourself. • Friendly, Kowledgeable Staff • Huge Selection of Flavors • Starter Kits and Supplies • Enjoyable, Relaxed Environment

7303 San Pedro (210) 979-VAPE

16350 Blanco (210) 479-2770

78 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

Forum Pointe (210) 651-0055

11888 Starcrest | 210 496-7092 Charlie-Browns.com

NIGHTLIFE

HECHO EN TEJAS?

Sorry Locavores: Texan made brews carry a tiny asterisk

San Antonio’s Premier Sports Bar in the Heart of Downtown

LANCE HIGDON

With the probable exception of toilet paper, Texans will pay a premium for anything branded by the Lone Star State. Be it pocket knives, baby onesies or pickup trucks of unusual size, we’re a people who drop serious cash for the sake of regional pride — and it’s doubly true when it comes to our beer. Yeah, the macros have moved a lot of units by plastering their cans of fizzy yellow swill with that beautiful flag, but in these (hop) heady times, real Texans are keeping their cold ones in-state. But one nagging question persists for the locavore/state supremacist in me: Are these brewskis 100 percent TX? They’re hecho en Tejas, clearly. Many sport the “Go Texan” logo somewhere on their label. When I check out the grain bills and the hop lists, however, the malt comes from Germany and the hops hail from New Zealand. It made me wonder if it’s possible to brew without ever leaving the Republic. Water, I learned, is the easiest ingredient to source, recent drought notwithstanding; moreover, the moderate hardness of our aquifers contributes to our flavor profiles. Employing native yeast requires a degree of surrender to the whims of nature, but it can be done. Jester King seems to have had pretty good luck with it. It’s the other two basic beer ingredients that complicate matters. Malt

comes from grain, primarily barley, which was only grown for cattle feed here until a few years ago. Today, Blacklands Malt have homesteaded a native malt provider up in Leander, where proprietor Brandon Ade oversees the overturning of small mountains of moist, germinating grain. It’s a very promising venture, but it will take many Blacklands to meet Texas’ demand. Hop prospects are even worse. As Vera Deckard, brewmistress of The OK Brewery And Eishaus, told me, “there is no such thing as Texas hops. Hops don’t grow here, unless they are babied, and then the yield is small.” There are several reasons for the dearth, but the chief culprit is that inescapable heat — hops thrive in cool, wet regions, and that just ain’t gonna happen here. The German freethinkers who settled Central Texas also didn’t have hops, but they found a decent alternative in the fruit of the wafer ash, aka the hop tree. It still grows here. Perhaps some enterprising young brewery will try it out, pitching the native shrub with some hydroponic Centennial cones (are you reading this, Planet K?) and some pure prairie two-row malt from Alpine or Fredericksburg. Sure, nobody’s used the hop tree in a commercial beer before, but Texans are nothing if not enterprising. If you have the chance to brew a beer that’s nose-to-tail native, I say come and take it.

Cigar Shop Fine Wine Champagne Art Gallery Smoke Shop and more!

NFL Game Mix on 80" UHD Screen Watch Spurs preseason games here and all NBA games on NBA League Pass! Go to www.ticketsportspub.com for details

NFL SUNDAY TICKET ESPN College Extra and SEC-PAC12-Big 10-LHN Free retro arcade games

727 S Alamo St. SUITE 200, San Antonio, TX 78205

(210)263-9729

420 E Houston

One block west of the Alamo

210-222-9722

ticketsportspub.com sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 79

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121 Broadway • (210)271-1058 80 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

MON-THUR: 10AM-10PM • FRI-SAT: 10AM-11PM • SUN: 12PM-9PM SMOKERZPARADIZE.COM • SMOKERZPARADISE@GMAIL.COM

NIGHTLIFE

THE HIGH LIFE

Our music editor’s ode to cheap beer MATT STIEB/@MATTHEWSTIEB

I’m a lucky man, for most often, my wallet and taste buds agree with each other. With beer, my alcoholic vice of choice, the pair votes unanimously in favor of the cheap stuff. There’s never been a miserly joy like the fool’s gold hue and feeble head of a $2 tallboy cracked open at an arctic temperature. Plus, a dollar tip on a $2 beer is a big-ass tip, percentagewise. Someday, that’s the type of logic that will make me a good dad. At the opposite end of the taste/price matrix, there lies the villain of this shoddy op-ed — craft beer. In 1979, in the most important amendment in alcohol law since Prohibition, Jimmy Carter deregulated the beer industry, opening up the marketplace for microbreweries. The field maintained steady growth until the new millennium, when demand and ABVs skyrocketed. According to the Brewers Association, craft beer had an economic impact of $3.8 billion in Texas last year. I’m no craft prohibitionist — arguing against a multibillion dollar business in Texas is op-ed suicide. However, these small, seasonal batches with quippy names and gorgeous cans have been riding the hype for too long. A couple years ago, I decided to quit purchasing fancy beers because I was sick of this low-stakes game

of Russian Roulette with my taste buds. Rarely could the dense flavors compensate for the sticker price, so my wallet told my brain to shut it down. More so than the taste, it’s the culture of the microbrew that I’m not fond of. I don’t care about unique coriander tones — the smell that I associate with craft beer is a roommate’s home-brewing efforts that harassed the kitchen with the yeasty aroma of a YMCA locker room. I don’t want to talk about beer. Surely, there’s more compelling topics of conversation. Like my choice of bicycle, I’m in it for the utility. Something fast, cheap and mass-produced. Something that’s not a talking point as much as a vehicle to a destination. Give me a Mexican beer, a cold, salty and beautiful thing. Like with food, our neighbors truly got it right even with cheap stuff. Lime is the great equalizer of Mexican beers — drench that Carta Blanca or Tecate in citrus and it can Pepsi challenge against a Pacífico any day of the week. I don’t need your crowlers and flavor profiles and small batch double IPAs and those little Jell-O shots to sample beer in. Sampling? This is a bar, not a supermarket bread aisle. So, enjoy your craft festivals and $5 beers, nerds. I’ll be in the basement pounding cans of High Life with your dad, making up words to Steely Dan songs and mispronouncing athlete names while yelling at the TV. mstieb@sacurrent.com

OCT 16 - Josh Abbott Band plus Sunny Sweeny & John Baumann

OCT 23 - Bleu Edmondson

OCT 24 - Bob Schneider

OCT 30 - William Clark Green

14492 Old Bandera Rd Helotes, TX (210)695-8827

For tickets: liveatfloores.com sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 81

DOWNTOWN C E NTRA L The Local Bar

HAPPY HOUR OF THE WEEK

Happy Hour 3-7pm Daily Mon. $3 Cosmos All Day. Tues. Shot Specials All Day. $2.75 Wells & $2 Ziegenbock Draft. “River Rat Specail” Always! Psychic Happy Hour Every Tuesday 6-8pm.

Luna Rosa

2603 S. E Military HAPPY HOUR 3-7PM $3 Small Guava-Rita, $4 House Rita $4 Sangria, $5 Tapas $2.50 Budweiser, Bud Light Lime, Bud Light $2.75 Wells $3 Dos XX

Club Sirius

DrinkSirius.com • @ClubSirius HH Daily Noon-8pm: $2 Wells, $2 Domestic 16oz Cans/Pints, $3 Jager

Charlie-Browns.com • 210-496-7092 Mon.-Fri. until 7pm $2.75 well drinks, $8.50 domestic pitchers, $2.75 domestic longnecks Mon.-Fri. 2-6pm 60¢ Wings Wednesday special from $6.50 domestic draft pitchers

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82 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

The Bar

100 Villita St. Monday-Friday 3PM-7PM $4 Well Drinks, $1 Off all Draught Beers, $5 Select Cocktails, $3 Spicy Tequila Infusion, $5 Sweet Potato Cinnamon Infused Irish Whiskey

Broadway 5050

210.832.0050 Mon-Fri 3-7pm $2 wells, Millter Lite, Coors Light Mon- $2 off wine, $1 off all bottles/cans Tues- Pint Night! Weds- Karoake Night: $3 wells, $5 mules Thurs- Texas Thursday! Ask for specials Fri- Bartender’s Choice Sat- $3 wells, $4 Fireball Sun- Industry Night: $3.50 Jameson Brunch Sat/ Sun- $2 Mimosas, $3 Bloodys

Nectar

Tuesday is 20% off of entire check all day and night, for Downtown Tuesdays Wed & Fri 15% off entire check 4-6pm

Cullum’s Atta Girl

726 E Mistletoe • (210) 437-4263 Get your Happy Hour Started Early Friday Lunch Pop 11a-2p and Micro Beers

On The Rocks Pub

270 Losoya, SATX 78205 facebook.com/ontherockspubTX HH: Mon-Fri, 2pm-7pm: $3 Wells, $3 Domestics, $3.75 Flavored Vodkas

Kimura

Happy hour monday - friday 4-7 Saturday 12-4 $6 Kimura Cocktails, $5 House Wines $4 Bottled Beer, $6 Draft Beer $3-$4 Appetizers, $6 Miso Ramen

Sancho’s Cantina & Cocina 628 Jackson St, • (210) 320-1840 4- 7pm Every Day Frozen Margs:$2.25, Well Drinks: $3.25 Select Cans: $2.50 Monday through Wednesday: Reverse Happy Hour 9-11pm

Epic Bar

1375 Austin Hwy • 210-467-5565 Sunday: Top Shelf Jam Session Monday: Free Pool Tuesday: T.P.O. Candle Light Unplugged Wednesday: Humpday Funday Thursday: Poker Night Friday: Live Tejano Bands Saturday: Karaoke Night

Flair Mexican Street Food 6462 N. New Braunfels Ave. 78209 Flairmexicanstreetfood.com HH:Monday-Friday,4- 7pm Sunday, 8-10 pm 1/2 price apps and Guac! $4 craft draughts $3 off cocktails and win $6 Michelada all day everyday

Tucker’s Kozy Korner

1338 E Houston St • (210) 320-2192 Sunday Brunch: Bloody Mary Bar and Bottomless Mimosas

Toro Taco Bar

114 Brooklyn Ave • torotacobar.com Reverse Happy Hour 9pm

VISI T HAPPYHOUR S.SACURRENT.C OM

NORTHWEST The Leaky Barrel HH 2p-8p $2 Tecate & Heineken $2.25 Domestic Drafts $2.50 Wells $3 Long Necks & More Daily Specials

Smitty’s Pub

$2.50 Domestic long necks $2.75 well drinks everyday 2pm - 8pm

Wurzbach Ice House

HH: 4- 8pm Home of the $2.50 Well Drink! $2 Domestic Draft $3 Import Draft, Daily specials 8 till close

The Over Bar and Grill

7905 Bandera Rd • (210) 455-3037 Happy Hour Everyday 3p-6p $3.75 Wells $2.50 Domestic 16oz Pints

Big Guido’s

2607 Jackson Keller • (210) 802-986 Free Wine Fridays with purchase of Adult Entrées

Raffles

1039 NE Loop 410 210.826.7118 HH 11a-6p Tuesday-Friday & 9p-11p Tues.Thurs. Daily Lunch Specials 11a-3p Closed Mondays

Highlander Bar & Grill

Mon-Sat: 7am - 4pm $3.25 Import Drafts & Mini Margaritas $2.75 Domestic Drafts Tue- $3.25 Mini Hurricanes Thu- $3.25 Premium Vodka Specials Sun- $.75 Wings & $3 Sunday Specials 4-8pm: $1 off mixed drinks & appetizers!

Shenanygans

SUN & MON - $2 Wells/Jello Shots $2 Domestic Pints/Cans, $3 Import Pints WED - $3 Wells $4 25 oz Domestic Mugs $5 25oz Imported Mugs

NORTH CENTRAL Michin Mexican Kitchen

7pm - 9pm $5 House Margaritas, $2.50 Domestic Bottles, Tecate & Dos XX, $3 Indio and Bohemia, and Mexican Draft $4. 427 N Loop 1604, Ste 202, SATX 78258 Behind Trader Joe’s

Slackers

Sports-Drinks-Arcade SlackerSA.com • $2.50 Domestics, $3 Wells Daily, $3 You Call It

NORTH EAST Beer Goggles

HH 2p-8p: 2 tecate & heineken 3.25 domestics bottle/draft 3.25 shiner&dos xx, $3 wells Plus Daily Specials

sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 83

Home of the

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84 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

$35 advance or $40 at the door!

MUSIC

CURTAIN CALL FOR CUBANOS

Once-silenced Buena Vista Social Club bids adiós J.D. SWERZENSKI

The release of the Buena Vista Social Club’s eponymous album in 1997 was something of a musical equivalent to uncovering the Dead Sea Scrolls. The Cuban sound had been ubiquitous in American culture through the 1940s and ‘50s, be it through Dizzy Gillespie’s famed Afro-Cuban Orchestra or Desi Arnaz’s portrayal as bandleader Ricky Ricardo on I Love Lucy, then with the embargo in 1960 … nothing. The signal went silent. It was easy to imagine, at least from an American perspective, that all the musical, artistic and cultural energy emanating from Cuba just stopped cold with the rise of Fidel Castro and communism. This made the Buena Vista Social Club all the more special: Here was a vanished form, assumed lost for good, suddenly rebroadcasting, and sounding more vibrant than ever. That the voices behind that record — bandleader Compay Segundo, singer Ibrahim Ferrer, pianist Rubén González — were the same musicians that had captured American audiences before the embargo, made the LP’s impact that much more substantial. “We perform timeless songs, that are a fusion of genres and styles,” says Barbarito Torres, laúd player and one of Buena Vista’s founding members. “We sing in Spanish, we have some French influences with danzón and above all we perform with our heart. We love what we do and I think this the audience can feel.” Nearly two decades have passed since Buena Vista emerged from Havana, and those audiences have kept feeling their sound in sold-out shows the world over. But the band has changed plenty during that time: Founders Segundo, Ferrer and González passed away at 95, 78 and 84, respectively (gotta respect that Cuban healthcare system). To maintain the vitality of the band, Buena Vista has invited a cast of modern Cuban musicians into the fold to further push the sound. “They are very talented artists, and we are happy to have them in the group,” Torres says of the Orquesta’s newest members, who include pianist Rolando Luna and singers Carlos Calunga and Idania Valdes. “We are a big family. Look, even [trumpeter Manuel ‘Guajiro’ Mirabal’s] grandson plays with us!” Family does seem an apt way to describe the warmth Buena Vista emits from the stage. Captivating as their debut album was, it’s in the live atmosphere where the rhythmic and emotional energy of their sound is most apparent (an energy nicely showcased on the 1998 Live in Madison Square Garden). Despite the band’s

many senior members, they’ve never failed to come alive in concert, a tradition that’s continued from their historic first appearances in Havana up through their upcoming show this Saturday at Laurie Auditorium. The expanded lineup — now fleshed out to a 13-piece — have added an extra dynamic with their eclectic musical backgrounds: Singer Omara Portuondo recently lent her vocal talents to reggaeton artist El Micha’s latest album, while Amadito Valdés has lent his percussion talents to numerous salsa and charanga recordings. The Social Club and their self-titled platinum 1997 album. It’s been an exciting development for the band in recent years as they’ve worked to incorporate the more flowing again, for better or worse. modern Cubano styles of the new In many ways it makes sense for the Buena Vista players into the traditional Buena Vista sound. Social Club to end their historic run with this current “Influences [have] been a great part of music tour. There’s always a cultural mission, a needed bridge evolution,” says Torres. “Influences mean movement, new between two estranged, closely related nations. In sounds and learning, and this is all good for the music. All the wake of their trailblazing influence, perhaps a new kind of music is important because it’s a representation of Cuban sound will captivate the world again. our culture and music is a way of communication, As for what the band has lined up beyond their many things indeed.” Orquesta Buena farewell tour, Torres claims they plan to enjoy Like the band, the world has also changed Vista Social Club their adiós to the world for as long as it lasts. plenty since 1997. The past year has seen an $29-$110 “We have a long tour for this year and some unprecedented thaw in U.S.-Cuban relations. 7:30pm, Sat Oct. 17 dates in 2016. Then some of us will work our own Though the two nations’ diplomacy is still far from Laurie Auditorium 1 Trinity Place solo projects. Music is our life, soul, and we will normalized, it seems a matter of time before the (210) 999-8119 keep playing.” cultural pipeline between both countries starts artssa.org sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 85

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MUSIC

We all know the highlight reel of San Antonio’s sterling musical tradition — Augie’s reverse-color organ, Flaco’s gold tooth, that Selena music video filmed on the River Walk where she eats B-grade Tex-Mex and gets dumped in a letter by some unknown fool. Our newest column, “According To Our Records” dives head first into the obscure, exploring the styles, songs and artists that slipped through the cracks of time and mass appeal. Something of an SA archivist, Rae D. Cabello brings us seven-inch singles and LPs from his crate-digging exploits, reopening avenues of the city’s winding past. MATT STIEB/@MATTHEWSTIEB

ACCORDING TO OUR RECORDS

A New Column Digs Through the Crates of Overlooked SA Music RAE D. CABELLO

A Taste of the Bass In the late ’80s, when gangster rap and new jack swing groups dominated the urban radio airwaves in San Antonio, two Northeast side teenagers known as Reality produced two gems that helped build the early foundations of San Antonio’s underground hip-hop scene. Ron “M.C. 14K” Kelley and Thaddeus “GQ” Crum met each other as honor students and youth members of the Second Baptist Church (one of the city’s more conservative black churches at the time). “We were the smart kids in school,” Kelley said. Both students shared a large interest in hip-hop, particularly the East Coast school for its lyrical depth and unique Five-Percent Nation terminology (a movement that was largely associated with hip-hop). Heavily influenced by the likes of Public Enemy, the duo decided to form Reality and include not only dancers, but “security” as well. After school, the group recorded in Kelley’s bedroom on a Sears department store sampler — the Casio SK-1 and a Yamaha multitrack recorder. Produced in 1988, the group released “A Taste of the Bass” and “Righteous Revolution” (1989) on their DIY label Divine Records. At

the time, Joey Records (Now El Zaz Music Inc.) didn’t know how to press rap or hip-hop records — the result was a muffled lo-fi sound that blanketed both songs, which at the time the group didn’t enjoy. Today, that sound is the happy accident some producers and emcees hope to achieve. “A Taste of the Bass” opens up with a crunchy, pulsating low-end that goes right into a heavy drum break and features vocals by friends Marius Williams and Louis Myers. Both Kelley and Crum trade off on vocals in a Beastie Boys fashion, letting its audience know that “SA, Texas is our hometown” while bringing in obscure samples and more vocals throughout the track. In “Righteous Revolution,” the group’s anti-drug and anti-gang stance is approached in a near battle rap form — “On the subject matter of just who’s badder, who’s number one serving suckas on a platter.” The group did some shows around town with other acts such as PKO (Pounds, Keys and Ounces), a group who also contributed early on to SA’s

rap scene with more of an NWA persona. The two teens eventually moved on to college, but still stayed closely connected to the hip-hop scene. Kelley interned at 96.1 FM alongside PKO’s DJ AK and helped bring acts to town like Outkast, Jay-Z, Houston legends UGK and The Notorious B.I.G. Crum moved to LA and pursued a music career with another local, Mad One (Brandon Morgan). Today, Kelley is the CEO of an educational company based in Texas while Crum enjoys a career in the auto industry. Kelley played a major part in the discovering and signing of Mad Decent rapper Riff Raff and is currently working with GZA on an educational project. These days, you can find their record in the hands of international collectors and online for around $200. However, Reality is worth much more than that. Aside from being pioneers in San Antonio’s hip-hop scene, they played an important role in its development — a contribution that can’t be measured. sacurrent.com • October 14-20, 2015 • CURRENT 87

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MUSIC

SUN

The Internet

The Internet doesn’t sound like an Odd Future Records joint. Fronted by Syd the Kyd and The Martian, the sextet makes songs of love and lust that tread more along jazz and R&B than Odd Future’s jarring confidence and braggadocio. Purple Naked Ladies (2011) had Syd baring a softer, innocent side backed by Erykah Baduizm-era soul and funk that would shadow them under the umbrella of alternative R&B. Two years later, Feel Good found Syd more confident with the sensual “Don’tcha” as her pillow-soft vocals exposed a newfound swagger still coupled with her innocent come-ons of “starstruck on all of you.” Feel Good also found Syd latching onto hooks, ditching aimless jazz-for jazz’s sake jam sessions in favor of melodies only Pharrell could possibly produce. No longer the innocent romantic, in Ego Death the Kyd is the lovelorn paramour reminiscing on jealous lovers and old flames while fantasizing of “kilos in the back seat” with girls of “cigarettes and sex on [their] breath.” Her syrupy falsettos are meshed with the warmth of ’70s soul and lush reverb, drawing out bedroom vibes on a Sunday morning. $20, 8pm, Alamo City Music Hall, 1305 E. Houston St., alamocitymusichall.com —Alejandra Ramirez

Wednesday, October 14

Go!Zilla This Italian combo is a big ol’ meatball of a band, who, in their finest and fuzziest moments, make other acid-dripping groups look like Chef Boyardee. With Flower Jesus, The Back Bones. Limelight, 9pm

Riverboat Gamblers Known for their obnoxiously energetic live shows, Riverboat Gamblers are a punk rock ’n’ roll band hailing from our great, white neighbor to the north (Austin) who never needed the peanut butter, broken glass or razor blades of punk provocateurs past to impress. On skateboard company Volcom’s Entertainment label, The Gamblers are perfect for the skatepark: loud, fast and built for 14-year-olds. Think a skinnier, soberer, slightly poppier Murder City Devils sans Farfisa. With The Heroine, Signalman. The Korova, 8pm

Seryn Moving from their home in Denton to Nashville, Seryn is a pop-folk nonet with impeccable harmonizing cred. With Octahedron. Paper Tiger, 7pm

Thursday, October 15

Samantha Fish Kansas City’s Samantha Fish sings of southern barrooms and blues traditions on her 2015 album Wild Heart. Sam’s Burger Joint, 7pm

The Cutthroats Local, self-proclaimed

“good ol’ fashioned punk band” The Cutthroats have literally invested blood, sweat and thousands of beers into their

15-year existence. With no interest in any fancy frills, expensive thrills or being defined as any sort of core, Joe, James, Kid and Travis are post-fuck you! With No Gods, DJ Smoak, DJ Ely Bat. The Mix, 10pm

Friday, October 16

Amplified Heat, Maneaters of Tsavo, Foxmoor Express The San Antonio Current kicks off GRSFD, our newest, off-the-cuff concert series. Hosted in the garage on the side of our big blue headquarters, GRSFD is a low-key, high octane celebration of the music we love. We begin on a shit-kicking foot with Austin trio Amplified Heat. Composed of brothers Jim, Gian and Chris Ortiz, the Austin trio takes cues from ’70s Detroit in fashion, facial hair and unrelenting blues rock. On their effort On The Hunt, once the brothers pick up on a rhythm, they don’t stop ’til it’s soaked in beer, kicked to the ground and dragged through the mud. San Antonio Current, 8pm

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Drive-by Truckers The Athens, Georgia band that anyone who I ever engage in Southern rock conversations with steers me toward, DBT clearly know their roots. But, when aiming as high as The Stones, Neil Young, The Band or Tom Petty, you’re bound to face an uphill battle. Their most compelling artistic offerings seem to be their song titles. Gruene Hall, 8pm

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MUSIC

Los Callejeros de San Anto Piñata Protest accordionist Alvaro Del Norte takes a break from the punk outfit of his acclaim and gets in on some puro tejano. With The Lucky Odds. The Mix, 9pm

The Octopus Project, Crooks on Tape Austin’s Octopus Project play out to the modern Devo, high on kitsch and actually rockin’ pop songs. Sharing the bill is the equally quirk-out pop-electric group Crooks on Tape. Hailing from LA, Crooks on Tape’s music is high-concept silliness built for the hotel room. Paper Tiger, 8pm

Yo-Yo Ma French-born Chinese-American cellist Yo-Yo Ma is one of the few contemporary classical performers to enter the conversation of pop culture. From his work with John Williams and Ennio Morricone to his Presidential Medal of Freedom and 18 Grammys, Ma might be the greatest to ever pick up the instrument. Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 8pm

Saturday, October 17

Brownout Presents Brown Sabbath It’s been over a year since Brownout first transformed into Brown Sabbath, and they haven’t looked back since. Their 2014 record of latin funk-infused Sabbath covers Brownout Presents Brown Sabbath was picked up by NPR as one of the top 50 releases of the year, going on to be the most high-profile release in the band’s decade-deep catalog. With Think No Think. Paper Tiger, 8pm

Elliott Smith: A Tribute to the Life & Music October 21 marks the 12th anniversary of Smith’s death, a time to celebrate the music he left behind with 18 singer-songwriters and two full bands including local favorite Buttercup covering his catalog of songs. Period Modern, 6:30pm

Holy Wave With their 2012 album Knife

Hits, Austin’s Holy Wave dropped the best drug reference as an album name

since Spacemen 3’s Taking Drugs to Make Music to Take Drugs To. With Lake of Fire, Sunjammer. K23 Gallery, 9pm

Insane Clown Posse It would be an easy blow to sum-up and judge the entirety of the horrorcorists’ career based on “Miracles,” the internet-infamous, memegenerating music video that gave birth to the line “Fucking magnets, how do they work?” That’s a little unfair given the group has their own religion, gatherings, clothing brand Hatchet Gear and a cult that goes by the name of “Juggalos,” a collection labeled as a gang by the FBI. Alamo City Music Hall, 9pm

Mixfest 2015 feat. Austin Mahone SA native and teeny-bopper Austin Mahone returns with his boy band shimmer. On his new single “Dirty Work,” Mahone and his PR homies have crafted up a slick new look a la 2013 Bieber. Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 7:30pm

The Cinderleaf San Anto alt-rock quartet The Cinderleaf celebrates their 20th anniversary as a band, riding through several waves of genre decay and revival. Rebar, 9pm

Sunday, October 18

Howard Jones A British musician who took the synth to the top of the ’80s charts, Howard Jones visits the Tobin Center for one of those “An Intimate Evening” gigs. Tobin Center for the Performing Arts, 7pm

Monday, October 19

Promised Land Sound This Nashville quintet slices effortlessly through folkrock like 2009 Tony Parker cut through the lane. Limelight, 9pm

Tuesday, October 20

Pop Pistol 10th Anniversary Concert

The magnanimous trio of Alex Scheel, Jorge Gonzalez and George Garza celebrates 10 years together at the final Lone Star Live concert of the season. With Octahedron, The Black Market Club. Arneson River Theater, 7pm

Alamo City Music Hall 1305 E. Houston St., alamocitymusichall.com Arneson River Theater 418 Villita St., (210) 207-8614, lavillita.com Gruene Hall 1281 Gruene Road, Gruene, (830) 606-1281, gruenehall.com K23 Gallery 702 Fredericksburg Road, (210) 776-5635, facebook.com/K23Gallery Limelight 2718 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 735-7775, thelimelightsa.com Paper Tiger 2410 N. St. Mary’s St., papertigersa.com Period Modern 4347 McCullough Ave., (210) 259-3234, periodmodern.com Rebar 8134 Broadway, (210) 320-4091, rebarsatx.com Sam’s Burger Joint 330 E. Grayson St., (210) 223-2830, samsburgerjoint.com San Antonio Current 915 Dallas St., sacurrent.com The Korova 107 E. Martin St., (210) 226-5070, thekorova.com The Mix 2423 N. St. Mary’s St., (210) 735-1313 Tobin Center for the Performing Arts 100 Auditorium Circle, (210) 223-8624, tobincenter.org

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DOWN THERE SAVAGE LOVE by Dan Savage

I am a 23-year-old Italian girl and I have been in a long-distance relationship for one year. We love to have sex, and when we are far away, we send each other hot pictures and videos. At least two times per week, we masturbate on Skype. There is something that confuses me about the way I masturbate when I am alone. My boyfriend watches pornos daily when we are far away. This is something I don’t like, but I have not asked him to give up watching pornos. I think there is nothing wrong in pornos by themselves: Sometimes I watch them, and when we are together, it’s me who suggests to watch them together or I let him watch them while I’m giving something to him. However, I’m not a fan of him watching pornos when he is alone. But when I masturbate, I think only about him watching porno alone. What’s wrong with my sexual fantasies? Confused Italian Asking Obviously

There’s nothing wrong with your sexual fantasies, CIAO, you’re just experiencing a little cognitive dissonance and residual sex-negativity — and that particular tension can both distress and arouse. But seeing as your boyfriend is going to look at porn (and other women) whether you want him to or not (just as you look at porn and other men), and since you enjoy porn together, I would advise you to err on the side of embracing your fantasies. And don’t feel like you have to overcome the cognitive dissonance. The naughtiness of it, the transgression, and the symbolic betrayal — all of that turns you on. So live with it, lean into it, and enjoy it. *For the record, quickly, before Tumblr explodes: Some women have penises! Some women with penises are uncut! A tiny percentage of uncut-penis-having women have poor personal hygiene practices and consequently have smegma under their foreskins! #TheMoreYouKnow

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JONESIN’ CROSSWORD by Matt Jones

Answer on page 29

“It’s HA-MA Time!” — 2 legit to solve ACROSS 1 Fizzling firecracker 4 Aquarium growth 8 Crumbly coffeehouse buy 13 “Cheerleader” singer 14 Fishing line holder 15 James Cameron blockbuster film 16 Another name for #, before it became a “tag” 18 Certain VWs 19 Event for someone who displays a “13.1” bumper sticker 21 “Dr. Mario” platform 22 Air France destination 23 Dix + dix 26 Writer Kesey 28 Pet advocacy org. 32 ___ En-lai 33 Crankcase container 35 The Sugarhill Gang’s genre 36 Highbrow monthly that’s the second-oldest continuous publication in the U.S. 39 William McKinley’s First Lady 40 Deletes 41 Baseball’s Vizquel 42 Result of rolling in the dough, maybe? 44 “The Chronicles of Narnia” monogram 45 In an abundant way 96 CURRENT • October 14-20, 2015 • sacurrent.com

46 1978 hit song with notable letters 48 “Doctor Who” airer 49 Adam Sandler’s production company, named after two of his films 54 Comic strip frames 55 Nastygrams 58 3/4-time dance 59 “True dat!” 60 2015 Melissa McCarthy comedy 61 Duel preludes 62 Pigeon fancier on “Sesame Street” 63 Clod-breaking tool

DOWN

1 “I just realized I messed up” outburst 2 “Be Cool” actress Thurman 3 Spoon companion, in a nursery rhyme 4 Band on a sleeve 5 Toronto Maple ___ (hockey team) 6 Hand sanitizer target 7 ___-Seltzer 8 Wife of Russian prime minister Dmitry Medvedev 9 “___ Clown” (Everly Brothers song) 10 Palindromic name 11 Palindromic bread 12 Urgent care

center alternatives 15 Barely open 17 End a call 20 2008 presidential candidate 23 Monitoring device in some 1990s TVs 24 “If ___ nickel ...” 25 Ephron and Dunn, for two 26 Stadium display where you’ll see couples smooching 27 “___ World” (“Sesame Street” segment) 29 Groom fastidiously 30 Word after ear or Erie 31 Copycatting 33 Iron source 34 Artist’s rep. 37 Some may be good to set 38 Movie like “Shaun of the Dead” or “Warm Bodies” 43 Prepare for editing 45 Classless? 47 Dermatologist’s concern 48 Challenge for a dog trainer, maybe 49 Icy pellets 50 Faris of films 51 “Call me Ishmael” speaker 52 Judi Dench, e.g. 53 “A Beautiful Mind” mathematician 54 Some Brit. statesmen 56 Fitbit’s was in June 2015 57 Corrosive cleaner

ETC.

FREE WILL ASTROLOGY by Rob Brezsny ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19): Here’s actor Bill Murray’s advice about relationships: “If you have someone that you think is The One, don’t just say, ‘OK, let’s pick a date. Let’s get married.’ Take that person and travel around the world. Buy a plane ticket for the two of you to go to places that are hard to go to and hard to get out of. And if, when you come back, you’re still in love with that person, get married at the airport.” In the coming weeks, Aries, I suggest you make comparable moves to test and deepen your own closest alliances. See what it’s like to get more seriously and deliriously intimate.

TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20): Some firefighters use a wetter kind of water than the rest of us. It contains a small amount of biodegradable foam that makes it ten times more effective in dousing blazes. With this as your cue, I suggest you work on making your emotions “wetter” than usual. By that I mean the following: When your feelings arise, give them your reverent attention. Marvel at how mysterious they are. Be grateful for how much life force they endow you with. Whether they are relatively “negative” or “positive,” regard them as interesting revelations that provide useful information and potential opportunities for growth.

GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20): Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell is a BBC TV min-series set in the early 19th century. It’s the fictional story of a lone wizard, Mr. Norrell, who seeks to revive the art of occult magic so as to accomplish practical works, like helping the English navy in its war against the French navy. Norrell is pleased to find an apprentice, Jonathan Strange, and draws up a course of study for him. Norrell tells Strange that the practice of magic is daunting, “but the study is a continual delight.” If you’re interested in taking on a similar challenge, Gemini, it’s available.

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22): We humans have put buttons on clothing for seven millennia. But for a long time these small knobs and disks were purely ornamental — meant to add beauty but not serve any other function. That changed in the 13th century, when our ancestors finally got around to inventing buttonholes. Buttons could then serve an additional purpose, providing a convenient way to fasten garments. I foresee the possibility of a comparable evolution in your personal life, Cancerian. You have an opening to dream up further uses for elements that have previously been one-dimensional. Brainstorm about how you might expand the value of familiar things.

LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22): You would be wise to rediscover and revive your primal innocence. If you can figure out how to shed a few shreds of your sophistication and a few

slivers of your excess dignity, you will literally boost your intelligence. That’s why I’m inviting you to explore the kingdom of childhood, where you can encounter stimuli that will freshen and sweeten your adulthood. Your upcoming schedule could include jumping in mud puddles, attending parties with imaginary friends, having uncivilized fun with wild toys, and drinking boisterously from fountains of youth.

head looked more like a harmless gopher snake’s than a dangerous rattler’s. I took the opportunity to sing it three songs. It stayed for the duration, then slipped away after I finished. What a great omen! The next day, I made a tough but liberating decision to leave behind a good part of my life so as to focus more fully on a great part. With or without a snake sighting, Sagittarius, I foresee a comparable breakthrough for you sometime soon.

VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22): While

CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19):

still a young man, Virgo author Leo Tolstoy wrote that “I have not met one man who is morally as good as I am.” He lived by a strict creed. “Eat moderately” was one of his “rules of life,” along with “Walk for an hour every day.” Others were equally stern: “Go to bed no later than ten o’clock,” “Only do one thing at a time,” and “Disallow flights of imagination unless necessary.” He did provide himself with wiggle room, however. One guideline allowed him to sleep two hours during the day. Another specified that he could visit a brothel twice a month. I’d love for you to be inspired by Tolstoy’s approach, Virgo. Now is a favorable time to revisit your own rules of life. As you refine and recommit yourself to these fundamental disciplines, be sure to give yourself enough slack.

Canadian author Margaret Atwood has finished a new manuscript. It’s called Scribbler Moon. But it won’t be published as a book until the year 2114. Until then, it will be kept secret, along with the texts of many other writers who are creating work for a “Future Library.” The project’s director is conceptual artist Katie Paterson, who sees it as a response to George Orwell’s question, “How could you communicate with the future?” With this as your inspiration, Capricorn, try this exercise: Compose five messages you would you like to deliver to the person you will be in 2025.

AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18): Every hour of your life, millions of new cells are born to replace old cells that are dying. That’s

why many parts of your body are composed of an entirely different collection of cells than they were years ago. If you are 35, for example, you have replaced your skeleton three times. Congratulations! Your creativity is spectacular, as is your ability to transform yourself. Normally these instinctual talents aren’t nearly as available to you in your efforts to recreate and transform your psyche, but they are now. In the coming months, you will have extraordinary power to revamp and rejuvenate everything about yourself, not just your physical organism.

PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20): The coming weeks will NOT be a favorable time to seek out allies you don’t even like that much or adventures that provide thrills you have felt a thousand times before. But the near future will be an excellent time to go on a quest for your personal version of the Holy Grail, a magic carpet, the key to the kingdom, or an answer to the Sphinx’s riddle. In other words, Pisces, I advise you to channel your yearning toward experiences that steep your heart with a sense of wonder. Don’t bother with anything that degrades, disappoints, or desensitizes you.

LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22): Many astronomers believe that our universe began with the Big Bang. An inconceivably condensed speck of matter exploded, eventually expanding into thousands of billions of stars. It must have been a noisy event, right? Actually, no. Astronomers estimate that the roar of the primal eruption was just 120 decibels — less than the volume of a live rock concert. I suspect that you are also on the verge of your own personal Big Bang, Libra. It, too, will be relatively quiet for the amount of energy it unleashes.

THIS MODERN WORLD by Tom Tomorrow

SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21): For now, you are excused from further work on the impossible tasks that have been grinding you down. You may take a break from the unsolvable riddles and cease your exhaustive efforts. And if you would also like to distance yourself from the farcical jokes the universe has been playing, go right ahead. To help enforce this transition, I hereby authorize you to enjoy a time of feasting and frolicking, which will serve as an antidote to your baffling trials. And I hereby declare that you have been as successful at weathering these trials as you could possibly be, even if the concrete proof of that is not yet entirely visible.

SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21): One afternoon in September, I was hiking along a familiar path in the woods. As I passed my favorite grandmother oak, I spied a thick, sixfoot-long snake loitering on the trail in front of me. In hundreds of previous visits, I had never before seen a creature bigger than a mouse. The serpent’s tail was hidden in the brush, but its

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