CONTRIBUTORS Josh Bradley, Kyla Fields, Amanda Hagood, Chuck Merlis, Michael Murillo, David Warner
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We’re marking the halfway point to St. Patrick's Day with the whiskey with over 150 awards since launching in 2021, Keeper's Heart—a unique blend that marries the best of Irish and American whiskey-making traditions.
Keeper's Heart has partnered with some of the fi nest pubs and restaurants across the Tampa Bay area to celebrate this milestone. Indulge in special drink offerings like the classic Irish Mule and the refreshing Celtic Lemonade. Now is the perfect time to gather your friends and join us at these outstanding venues during this halfway celebration weekend! Discover the top spots below:
The Horse & Jockey
1155 Pasadena Ave S, South Pasadena, FL
33707 From Friday, September 13th to Tuesday, September 17th, make your way to The Horse & Jockey, a beloved South Pasadena pub known
for its inviting atmosphere. Sip on an Espresso Martini crafted with Keeper’s Heart Irish + American whiskey or enjoy a Paper Plane made with Keeper’s Heart Irish + Bourbon.
Molly's Pub
1562 Main St, Sarasota, FL
34236 Celebrate halfway to St. Patrick’s Day at Molly's Pub, a Sarasota favorite with a cozy setting and great vibes. Throughout the month, Molly’s will be featuring a Blackberry Smash made with Keeper’s Heart Irish + American and an Old Fashioned with Keeper’s Heart Irish + Bourbon.
McGrath's Kitchen & Cocktails
can enjoy a Smoked Old Fashioned made with their single barrel pick - Keeper’s Heart Irish + American fi nished in PX Sherry barrels.
Ed's Tavern
1305 108th St E, Bradenton, FL 34212 For a lively atmosphere, visit Ed's Tavern in Bradenton. From Friday, September 13th to Tuesday, September 17th, Ed’s will feature a Smoked Old Fashioned made with their Keeper’s Heart PX Sherry fi nish single barrel pick.
8110 Lakewood Main St, Bradenton, FL
34202 Visit McGrath's from Friday, September 13th to Tuesday, September 17th, where you
Irish 1916
Locations in Brandon and Plant City, FL Immerse yourself in Irish culture at Irish 1916. From Friday, September 13th to Tuesday, September 17th, they’ll be serving up delicious Keeper’s Heart Irish Mules and Black Cherry Celtic Lemonades.
Hattricks
107 S Franklin St, Tampa, FL 33602 Hattricks is the place to be in downtown Tampa for great food, drinks, and live sports. All month long, they’ll be featuring Keeper’s Heart Irish Mules and Celtic Lemonades.
Keeper’s Heart is a whiskey that masterfully blends the rich traditions of Irish and American whiskey-making by bringing together the smoothness of Irish whiskey with the boldness of American whiskey. Crafted by legendary Master Distiller Brian Nation, renowned for his work with Jameson, Midleton, and Redbreast, Keeper’s Heart has already won over 150 awards since its launch in 2021, including World’s Best Irish whiskey at SFWSC in 2023. Whether savored neat, on the rocks, or in your favorite cocktail, this award-winning whiskey is the perfect companion for celebrating the halfway mark to St. Patrick's Day. Cheers and Sláinte!
Down and dirty
Photos by Dave Decker
Nearly 14 years of community-building came to an end early Monday morning as a packed Crowbar patio watched DJ Casper play Caserta's "Most High," the last record on the last night of Ol’ Dirty Sundays. Before that, a line snaked down 8th Avenue, leaving some to listen to the last dance from the street as the venue hit capacity while special guest DJ Craze threw down. Inside, bartenders from the nascent days of ODS when the party started as early as 4 p.m., reunited in one of the corner bars while b-boys and girls from the last decade-and-a-half got one last dance in the courtyard. Casper told the crowd that stayed until the end that ODS would come back, with Crowbar boss Tom DeGeorge promising the faithful that they would talk again. Until then, Sundays in Ybor City will never be the same. Visit cltampa.com/slideshows to see all the photos.—Ray Roa
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Tampa Bay's best things to do from September 05 - 11
Skyway’s the limit
Art fans are gonna do some driving over the Sunshine Skyway Bridge this fall thanks to the collection exhibitions that share the span’s name. The shows—at the Tampa Museum of Art, Museum of Fine Arts St. Pete, The Ringling, USF CAM and Sarasota Art Museum—include Carola Miles questioning reality in her “UFO Alphabet,” Cort Hartle’s poetic and ceramic walk through the neighborhood, Indigenous art from Corinne Zepeda, the larger-than-life sculpture of Dominique Labauvie, Nigerian Sri Lankan visual artist Sam Modder (work pictured), and more. Skyway is officially open at all five venues through Oct. 27 and membership at one museum gets you free entry to all five this month. Visit cltampa.com/arts to read more.
Skyway 2024: Through Oct. 27. Various museums in Tampa, St. Petersburg and Sarasota. skywaytampabay.com—Jennifer Ring
Paint it beige
Jeff Klein’s comedy references being what he calls a “beige” gay: Not a colorful stereotype but not ashamed of who he is, either. In doing so, he wants his brand of comedy to appeal to everybody. “The gay and straight communities tend to showcase flashier gays, or focus on drag, or flamboyant gays,” Klein told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. “I want to know if there is a lane for a beige gay in the world and in the world of comedy, if that lane would be welcomed on both sides.” The name of the special he’s taping over two nights in Ybor City comes from an unusual source: A toddler. A friend’s child was learning French words, and the French word for “fatigue” came out as “Fatty Gay” to her. Most people would just see it as a cute mispronunciation. But Klein is a comedian, is gay, and often makes fun of his own dad-bod physique, so he saw it differently. “When a word sounds like how I look, and means how I feel (tired), I thought that has to be the name of my special,” Klein said.
Fatty Gay—Jeff Klein comedy special taping: Sundays, Sept 8 & 15. 6:30 p.m. $15-$20. The Commodore. 811 E. 7th Ave., Ybor City. jeffkleincomedy.com—Michael Murillo
It’s a farce
The subtitle says it all. Washington Post called Selina Fillinger’s farce “the next best thing to ‘Veep’... a profane West Wing comic strip of a play in which a septet of hypercaffeinated actresses let their funny flags fly.” For Tampa’s Jobsite Theater, director Summer Bohnenkamp has rounded up a who’s who of Tampa Bay talents, including Noa Friedman as the President’s latest dalliance, Katrina Stevenson as his beleaguered Chief of Staff, and Andresia Moseley as his Harvard-educated First Lady, all trying to rescue POTUS from a self-inflicted PR nightmare. As for POTUS himself, he remains unseen (but we can kinda guess who he’s based on).
POTUS—Or, behind every great dumbass are seven women trying to keep him alive: Select nights through Sept. 29. $30 & up. Jobsite Theater’s Shimberg Playhouse at David A. Straz Center for the Performing Arts, 1010 N Macinnes Pl., Tampa. jobsitetheater.org—David Warner
COURTESY
SARASOTA ART MUSEUM
Flourishing dichotomies
A piece of the world’s largest collection of Florida art is now on display at Hillsborough Community College’s Dale Mabry campus. Flourishing Dichotomies presents artwork from the Vickers Collection, on loan from the Harn Museum of Art in Gainesville. Samuel H. and Roberta T. Vickers’ collection includes more than a thousand Florida artworks, made during the early-1800s through the mid-1900s. The collection is too large for even the Harn to show all at once, so it slowly started loaning these artworks out to galleries throughout Florida. Flourishing Dichotomies—up through Oct. 17—presents nine works of modern Florida art from the Vickers collection alongside works by contemporary Florida artists Jenny Carey, Miguel Fleitas, Bruce Marsh, Selina Román, and Alex Torres. Together, they span 100 years of Florida art. While you’re at HCC, check out “Common Grounds,” an exhibition that includes selections from the college’s permanent collection.
Flourishing Dichotomies: Florida Art, Past & Present artist talk: Thursday, Sept. 5. 5 p.m.-8 p.m. No cover. Gallery 221 at Hillsborough Community College Dale Mabry, 4001 W Tampa Bay Blvd., Tampa. hccfl.edu—Jennifer Ring
Spectacular
For more than 1,100 days, Cathy Salustri was a big part of the Creative Loafing Tampa Bay newsroom, bringing her love of Florida and the Bay area to readers as the Arts & Entertainment editor. And while she walked away from her full-time duties in March 2019, then bought the neighborhood publication Gulfport Gabber a year later, Salustri is still in the room at CL, this time in the form of her latest book, “Florida Spectacular.” Across 128 pages, she passes on Florida Man (and woman) tropes in lieu of a dive into the Sunshine State’s natural wonders (ie Wekiwa Springs, pictured) and a push to shine light on less-famous events or idiosyncrasies about this place we call home—including the belief that the Bay area has evaded a major hurricane thanks to Indigenous burial mounds in St. Pete.
‘Florida Spectacular’ book launch: Friday, Sept. 6. 7 p.m.-8 p.m. No cover (but the book isn’t free, duh). Gulfport Brewery + Eatery, 3007 Beach Blvd. S, Gulfport. upress.ufl.edu—Ray Roa
Silver scares
Howl-O-Scream at Busch Gardens is turning 25. Last month, the local theme park announced this year’s almost entirely new spooky lineup for the 25th anniversary of the annual Halloween-themed bash, which runs on select nights after 7 p.m. through Nov. 2. To mark the big milestone, BG is debuting five all new haunted houses and five all new scare zones, plus new entertainment options around the park, including Shadows of Wonderland, Terror Through Time, Tree Lot Massacre, the Skunk Apethemed Sawgrass Slaughter, and more.
Howl-O-Scream: Select nights from Sept. 6-Nov. 2. 7 p.m. $34.99 & up. Busch Gardens Tampa Bay, 10165 McKinley Dr., Tampa. buschgardens.com—Colin Wolf
Taking shape
Federal trial for St. Pete’s ‘Uhuru Three’ begins this week.
By Mitch Perry/Florida Phoenix
This week in a federal courtroom in Tampa, the U.S. government will open its case against three members of a St. Petersburg Black nationalist group, contending they acted as illegal agents of the Russian government without giving notice to the attorney general.
Omali Yeshitela is the longtime chairman of the African People’s Socialist Party, also known as the International People’s Democratic Uhuru Movement, which has been based in St. Petersburg since 1972 (with chapters in St. Louis and Oakland). Along with two members of the party’s “Solidarity Front,” Penny Hess and Jesse Nevel, “the Uhuru three,” as they are calling themselves, were indicted in April 2023 along with one other U.S. citizen and three Russian nationals for allegedly working on behalf of the Russian government and in conjunction with the Russian Federal Security Service (FSB) to conduct a multi-year foreign “malign influence campaign” in the U.S.The three Uhuru members held a press conference at their party headquarters in South St. Petersburg last Wednesday, where they declared their innocence and mocked the evidence the U.S. government has assembled against them.
well as other information designed to cause dissension in the United States and to promote secessionist ideologies.”
Hess, 78, said last Wednesday that the case is an attack on free speech, because nowhere in the indictment does it allege that the party has ever done “anything like murder or fraud or theft of anything like that.”
“Yes, he spoke in Russia,” she said about Yeshitela’s participation in the conference as listed in the indictment. “He spoke in Spain. He has spoken all over Europe. He has spoken in many, many places in Africa, in Jamaica, just all over the world.”
Yeshitela, 82, spoke last at the press conference. He grew angry and at times emotional in questioning the rationale that somehow he had been influenced by the Russians. He said that what had informed his politics was living and enduring racism as a Black man growing up in Florida in the preCivil Rights era.
LOCAL NEWS
“It is first and foremost and above all an attack on the African Liberation movement and attack on the Black community itself,” said Nevel, 34, who, like Hess, is white. “A continuation of the U.S. government’s historic attacks against the struggle for Black people for struggle and independence.”
The case
The facts of the case as laid out by the government start with a Russian citizen named Alexsandr Victorovich Inovov, who, working with officers of the FSB, allegedly used members of different U.S. political groups as foreign agents of Russia. The indictment claims Inovov began hosting conferences with the Anti-Globalization Movement of Russia in 2013 that were funded by the Russian government.
According to the indictment, after attending a conference in Moscow in 2015, the Uhurus “entered into a partnership” with Ionov “to publish pro-Russian propaganda, as
“Did the Russians shape me?” he asked. “What shaped my experiences? St. Petersburg, Florida, in the beginning, shaped my experiences. The St. Petersburg Times [where he worked for a time as a reporter; now the Tampa Bay Times], in the beginning, shaped my experiences. Just living as a Black person living under terror all the time. I was the same age as Emmitt Till when they murdered Emmitt Till,” he said, referring to the 14-year-old Black kid abducted and lynched in Mississippi in 1955 after being accused of offending a white woman in her family’s grocery store.
“I was there when the civil rights movement was heating up! And I was here when Black people were being hosed with high-powered water hoses. When Black people were just trying to vote. Black children, Black people, just wanted to join Joe Biden’s [Democratic] Party! That was what shaped my understanding. Not Russia!”
‘Wedges’
In its indictment, the federal government notes that among the foreign policy objectives of Russia’s government leadership was to expand its sphere of influence, and that’s why agents targeted the U.S. and other countries. The
indictment alleges that Russia sought “to create wedges that reduce trust and confidence in democratic processes, degrade democratization efforts, weaken U.S. partnerships with European allies, undermine Western sanctions, encourage anti-U.S. and anti-Western political views, and counter efforts to bring Ukraine and other former Soviet states into European and international institutions.”
The Uhurus have long been critical of the U.S. government and foreign policy. Its working platform going back to 1979 has called for the release of all Black people in prisons, withdrawal of the police “from our oppressed and exploited communities,” and for the U.S. government and “the international European ruling class” to pay reparations to Africa and African people.
The indictment asserts that FSB officers “supervised Ionov’s efforts to actively direct
the campaign of a candidate for local political office in St. Petersburg, Florida, in 2019.” The indictment does not list any candidate or race.
Over the years, members of the Uhuru movement have run for local office on several occasions. Yeshitela himself ran for mayor of St. Petersburg in 2001, finishing fifth in a nine-person field. Nevel ran for mayor in 2017, receiving 1.7% of the vote. Another member of the group, Eritha Akile Cainion, who now goes by the name Akile Anai, ran for city council in 2017 and 2019. Ahead of the trial, the group held a rally and march last Saturday morning at their headquarters in South St. Petersburg.The was is scheduled to start on Tuesday, Sept. 3, at the federal courthouse in Tampa. Among those organizers that said they would be in attendance are Green Party presidential candidate Jill Stein. If the Uhuru 3 are convicted, they say that they could face as much as 15 years in prison.
MR. CHAIRMAN: Omali Yeshitela will be in a federal courthouse this week.
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On guard
Despite win, school board member knows attacks on public education will continue.
By Chuck Merlis and Ray Roa
After being literally targeted by Gov. Ron DeSantis, Jessica Vaughn isn’t exactly breathing a sigh of relief.
“I knew this race was going to be tough no matter what,” Vaughn told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay two days after last month’s election where she handily beat back a challenge in Hillsborough County’s District 3 school board race.
Vaughn worried less about her political career and more for the wellbeing of her family after the governor set his sights on her race.
“It was personal pressure,” she added. “Am I safe? Are there people who believe the horrible lies that I want to support pedophiles, or that I’m trying to peddle pornography in schools? That gives someone a lot of leeway to want to hurt people if you create that narrative around them just trying to do their jobs.”
Vaughn’s opponent, Myosha Powell was one of 23 school board candidates endorsed by DeSantis statewide. And she wasn’t the only one who lost on a night that further diminished the light of a governor who became more or less untouchable politically in a 2022 re-election campaign that saw him wipe the floor with Republi-crat Charlie Crist.
Timing in politics is everything; just ask former New Jersey Governor Chris Christie, who after being viewed as the future of the Republican Party for just 10 years, is now a pariah. The last 18 months for DeSantis— marked by prolonged and public spats with Disney and former President Donald Trump, and capped off by a doomed Presidential campaign—have seen his influence both in national and statewide politics dwindle.
sought to install political allies in both governorappointed roles, like at New College of Florida.
The governor has also not hesitated to throw the weight of his political apparatus behind school board candidates. In 2022, only five of the 30 school board candidates he backed lost.
Not this time.
In last month’s election, nearly half of the candidates DeSantis endorsed for school board
Hillsborough County. In District 3, Myosha Powell lost to Jessica Vaughn by nearly 6,000 votes.
Vaughn beat Powell by more than 6,000 votes; the District 3 race was different from the one in DIstrict 1, with Powell unable to replicate the fundraising advantage Collins had over Combs.
“What a lot of people don’t see when they look at the fundraising is that the governor basi-
Danielle Marolf and Erika Picard. In Pinellas’ District 5, DeSantis-backed Stacy Geier, also failed to secure a victory in a three-way race, earning just 37% of the vote and being forced into a November runoff against Katie Blaxberg.
While the trend of DeSantis-backed candidates suffering defeats continued into Sarasota, Pasco, Manatee, and Polk counties, the election did see 12 of the governor’s candidates win, including Tony Ricardo and Melody Bolduc, whose victories in Duval secured a 4-3 conservative majority on the county’s school board.
positions lost their races, a result almost unimaginable just two years ago. In Hillsborough’s District 1 school board race, DeSantis-backed Lalya Collins failed to unseat incumbent Nadia Combs.
And the governor’s grip over Florida politics appeared to weaken last month, as candidates he endorsed across the state for school board positions lost elections up and down the state.
DeSantis has worked to overhaul the Florida education system, engaging in culture war issues like the so-called “Don’t Say Gay” bill, banning certain books, and dictating curriculum on how topics like gender and sexuality are taught. He has long
Collins’s defeat came despite taking in over $136,000 dollars in campaign contributions, according to the Hillsborough Supervisor of Elections. By contrast Combs raised less than $75,000. Despite the gulf in cash, Combs still cruised to reelection, outpacing Collins by more than 4,000 votes.
cally poured his presidential war chest, which he had amassed during his failed presidential campaigns, directly into this Empower Parents PAC,” Vaugn told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay two days after her election night win.
“It just seems that it’s the same business as usual.”
CNN said the Friends of Ron DeSantis PAC changed its name to Empower Parents PAC over the summer and received $82.5 million from the DeSantis-supporting Never Back Down PAC.
Candidates who got the governor’s stamp-ofapproval in Pinellas County got the same results.
Collins was not the only DeSantis-backed school board candidate to lose their elections in
Incumbents Laura Hine and Eileen Long defeated their DeSantis-backed candidates
But Vaughn told CL she didn’t see her race through a partisan lens. “There were so many Republicans that voted for me because they really care about public education,” she added.
Some say the school board election offers a glimmer of hope for Florida’s Democratic Party, which has been looking for a way to reestablish its footing in the state. In a statement on election night, Florida Democratic Party Chair Nikki Fried said “Ron DeSantis’ culture wars are over.”
Vaughn is a little less sure.
“I think that it’s hard to say. I think that some of the more divisive, immediate, culture war stuff, obviously has been cooling down, and that’s not working,” she told CL, adding that the next round of attacks on public schools—which have been happening for two decades—will be more calculated and below the surface.
“They realize it doesn’t resonate with our communities as much, that there are people on all sides of the aisle that are very pro-public education, people who see the value of it and how much it means to our communities and want to support it,” Vaughn added.
But the bitterness may have already started. Vaughn said she has not received one word of congratulations or a sincere “I wish you luck” from any of her opponents or the governor.
“There’s no interest in collaboration or working together across the aisle on what’s best for our kids and for schools,” she said. “It just seems that it’s the same business as usual.”
LOSER’S TOUCH: DeSantis took more Ls than anticipated in last month’s election.
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Taco’bout it
Mexican food leads latest round of local restaurant openings.
By Kyla Fields
There’s a new go-to spot for tacos, margaritas and weekend brunch in Ybor City, and its name may sound familiar to folks from the Midwest and Northeast. Located at 1822 E 7th Ave., Tampa Bay’s first Barrio Tacos has been dishing out margaritas, whiskey-based cocktails, chips, salsa and build-your-own tacos after a grand opening this summer.
While Barrio Tacos features a few traditional Mexican options like chorizo, a range of salsas and guacamole, there’s tons of eclectic dishes on its menu as well, from Coca Cola-marinated steak and Thai chili tofu to buffalo chicken queso and its chicken shawarma taco that’s a special this month. On Saturday and Sundays, the new bar and restaurant also dishes out eggs Benedict and bloody Mary tacos, avocado tostadas, sangria, mimosas and more.
Owner and franchisee Jason Crawford— who moved to Ybor City with his wife and co-owner Lauren back in January—tells Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that they wanted to make sure Barrio Tacos not only payed homage to Ybor City’s history and culture, but to the institutional restaurant La Tropicana that formerly occupied the building.
Massachusetts, the only other Florida location of Barrio Tacos resides in Orlando.
Head to @barrio_yborcity on Instagram for more information about Ybor City’s newlyopened taco and margarita joint. Barrio Tacos is now open from 11 a.m.-midnight Sunday through Thursday and 11 a.m.-1 a.m. Friday and Saturday.
Tampa Mexican restaurant Guac N’ Cheese will take over King State’s former St. Pete location
There’s already an abundance of Mexican restaurants in downtown St. Petersburg, but a popular Tampa spot is heading across the bridge to join the competition. Guac N’ Cheese will open at co-working space Cohatch at 15 8th St. N (stylized “COhatch”), out of a restaurant parcel that was previously occupied by King State’s first St. Pete location.
While there’s no opening timeline just yet, the Mexican restaurant’s website says that its St. Pete restaurant will debut sometime this fall.
OPENINGS
“We wanted to make sure that its history and legacy is still recognized—we certainly have big shoes to fill,” Crawford says about La Tropicana. “We strive to honor what was established here for so long, and hope to be part of Ybor for a long time, too.”
While the outside of the building resembles the old Cuban restaurant, Crawford says that Barrio Tacos’ revamped interior has a “wow factor” that features the brand’s Day of the Dead-themed decor, unique metalwork and art that pays homage to Ybor City’s eclectic culture. Aspects from La Tropicana that were preserved include the dining room’s layout, the bar top and several of its old stained glass windows.
Crawford also wants to remind his new customers that although Barrio Tacos resides on Ybor City’s bustling 7th Avenue, the new restaurant is family-friendly and offers both a kid’s menu and high chairs.
While the taco company operates several franchises in states like Michigan, Ohio and
Guac N’ Cheese’s Tampa location at 4101 S MacDill Ave. opened in 2019 and dishes out an approachable, Mexican menu of fajitas, quesadillas, taco salads, empanadas, stuffed jalepeños, flautas, enchiladas, tacos and more.
The Tampa-based Mexican grill also offers a variety of entrees, which range from carne asada platters and tamales to chile relleno, carnitas, and a molcajete filled with sizzling steak, shrimp, chicken and sautéed veggies. A kid’s menu, special vegetarian options, and a variety of sides and a la carte items are available, too.
King State St. Pete soft opened in December 2023 and closed its doors indefinitely by early April. Its flagship coffee shop and bar at 520 E Floribraska Ave. in Tampa is still open from 8 a.m.-midnight daily.
Follow @guacncheese_stpete for the latest news on Guac N’ Cheese’s debut St. Pete location, slated to open this fall.
Talkin’ Tacos opens first Tampa location
Popular Florida taco chain Talkin’ Tacos’ first Tampa location is officially open. “West Coast Florida, get ready for an authentic culinary experience that starts with Talkin’ Tacos
handcrafted tacos and ends with our indulgent churros,” said Mohammad Farraj, Talkin’ Tacos co-founder and chief marketing officer in a statement.
For the unfamiliar, beef birria is the cornerstone of this fast-casual concept, which the restaurant says is braised daily for 12 hours. Of course, besides birria tacos, the menu spans everything from birria ramen, birria pizza, and even birria grilled cheese. There’s also street corn in a cup, Southwest chicken tacos, bang bang shrimp tacos, churros, burritos, rice bowls,
house-made horchatas, mangonadas, lemonades, and more.
The company launched as a Miami food truck in 2020, and has since grown to 14 locations across Florida and the southeast with plans to expand into Washington D.C., North Carolina and Texas later this year.
Talkin’ Tacos says another Tampa location is expected to open in Westchase later this year, but no exact opening date or location was announced. The new Tampa location will be open daily, from 11 a.m.-10 p.m.—Colin Wolf
“This tiny oasis shines like a polished tiger eye under the brilliant summer sky.”
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Deep thoughts
Plumbing the depths at St. Petersburg’s Round Lake.
By Amanda Hagood
Iwonder if I could swim there?
It’s a simmering August morning in St. Petersburg. The sun’s still-slanted light plays through the jigsaw branches of the ancient banyan onto the grassy bank leading down to Round Lake. This tiny oasis, a hidden gem just west of the busy Fourth Street North corridor, shines like a polished tiger eye under the brilliant summer sky. The steady splash of the aeration fountain cools my soul exactly two degrees as perspiration pools along my hairline and creeps down my back. Watching a tricolored heron thread its way through the spikeweed and pickerel along the water’s edge, I feel I’m about ready to give up on my mission—learning more about a decade-long effort to restore the lake’s habitat—and just dive in. Those refreshing depths are calling my name. But how deep is Round Lake, really? As it turns out, it depends on the year.
Days earlier, in the mercifully cool rooms of the St. Petersburg Museum of History’s archives, I’d seen an 1888 plat of the neighborhood that identified the pool as Deep Water Lake. Just how deep remained unclear. But the presence of two other bodies nearby—“Long Pond” and “Grass Pond”—seemed to suggest it was a deep spot in a chain of marshy lakes that once stretched just north of town. Possibly a sinkhole fed by groundwater. And while this watery triad stuck around for at least another 18 years, appearing again on city plats in 1902 and 1906, by the time St. Pete celebrated its sweet 16 in 1908, there was just one lake with a whole new name: Park Lake. Looking sweatily around the park, I think that name says so much about the landscape I now see. A square block of lawn, sheltered by mature oaks, stately palms, and the magnificent banyan, slopes gracefully down to the water. The park is ringed by a promenading sidewalk and crowned by a stately gazebo—a replica of the one that originally served as a streetcar stop for folks visiting the park. Beyond the shadows of the trees, old storefronts and historic houses are a gentle suggestion of the city beyond. The lake is a gorgeous centerpiece, so perfectly round that it was sometimes called “Silver Dollar Lake” by the aviators that flew over the city in its early days. This is, as neighbors will attest, a place where folks can escape from the stressors of the city for a while. But it’s a citified sort of nature, sculpted and shaped by the
city’s park commission to—as a 1913 writer for the St. Petersburg Daily Times put it—“remove the unsightly marshy places” that ringed its shores and create a true “beauty spot.” Pleasing polygons replaced the messy mire of the past.
At the edge of my vision, the heron spears a fish with its black-tipped bill.
In the archives, you can watch how this vision of City Beautiful unfolded. In 1914, muck cleared from the park was spread along the St. Pete waterfront to cover the bare sand and provide a foundation for landscaping. In 1916, St. Pete Postmaster and chair of the park board Roy S. Hanna championed the idea of transforming
Round Lake into an alligator farm, noting that alligators were rapidly disappearing from their natural habitats in Florida and that Northern tourists expected to see them while visiting. (While this exciting idea never came to pass, one such northerly visitor would open a privatelyowned alligator farm to the south of the city just two years later.)
CITY WILDS
Perhaps the park’s crowning moment came in 1938, when the city marked the 50th anniversary of the arrival of the Orange Belt Railroad at the Festival of States—the yearly celebration in which clubs formed of snowbirds from various parts of the country staged a magnificent parade, with floats showing off their home states. That March, Round Lake hosted a fantastical evening Golden Jubilee Pageant on a towering three-story stage over the lake. Spectators seated on the city’s signature green
benches, specially brought in for the occasion, watched as hundreds of performers danced tributes to the sunshine, the railroad, Florida citrus, and Florida flowers, among many other topics. Reporters gushed about the “glory of the scene” as lights reflected off the lake’s placid waters. Today, it’s the bright green stalks of fireflag and the white speckles of ibis that shine along the lake as I meet Adrian Arabitg, a neighbor who helped form a conservation group known as the Friends of Round Lake. When Arabitg moved to the neighborhood in 2014, he explains, the lake looked very different: there were few if any birds to be found and the surface was clogged with invasive plants, which were regularly treated with pesticides. Since its glory days of Golden Jubilee Pageants and the St. Pete Fishathon (a city-wide kids’ fishing
continued on page 34
COOL STORY: Dive into the history of Fourth Street’s hidden gem.
“The flaws in our logic are beginning to show.”
continued from page 33
contest begun at Round Lake in 1948), the lake had borne the brunt of the development around it, and had fallen into neglect.
Working with the City, the Historic Uptown Neighborhood Association, Keep Pinellas Beautiful, and a local nonprofit called Stewards of our Urban Lakes (SoUL), Arabitg and his neighbors staged dozens of clean-up days and ended the spraying. They installed a native aquatic plant plot, designed to provide habitat while naturally filtering nutrients from the lake’s water, which has since doubled in size. The birds have returned— and the dog-walkers, bench-sitters, and outdoor yogis and yoginis have followed. “The lake is our gathering place,” Arabitg tells me, as we enjoy the shady retreat of the gazebo. “We just wanted to bring some life back to it.”
But there was one challenge nobody was expecting. In late 2021, Round Lake began to dry up. After a particularly dry winter, water started receding from the lake’s shoreline, leaving exposed lakebed to bake in the sun. By March 2022, the lake had shrunk to about half its original size. “It was basically a mud pit,” Arabitg laments.
retaining wall and a small culvert—all part of the complex plumbing that supplies the lake with surface water. I recall another article, dated 1925, which described the installation of a pipe to drain Round Lake into nearby Mirror Lake. Like an overflow hole in a gigantic sink, the pipe was meant to keep the lake’s level manageable, and suppress flooding in the neighborhood, in times of too much rain.
CITY WILDS
Everyone knew that Round Lake depended on rainfall to survive. But a complicating factor was soon discovered by the City: a pump which had been installed in the 1970s to keep the lake full had broken. Simply fixing it wasn’t an option, as pumping groundwater to fill a lake—especially a “manmade” lake without significant connections to the larger ecosystem—had since become illegal. And years of laying down impermeable streets and parking lots in the surrounding neighborhood had limited the lake’s natural groundwater recharge. A temporary fix of repairing the pump and rerouting the water to irrigate the surrounding park (which eventually drains into the lake) is still in place as the City searches for a long term solution.
I scan the lake’s edge, noting an old concrete
Too much rain, or not enough. My mind returns to the question of depth: in the journey from Deep Water Lake to Round Lake, from messy marsh to perfect park, it seems, the city had taken on the challenge of managing an ecosystem it had just barely begun to understand. And with the hotter temperatures, drier droughts, and fiercer rainfall of climate change now bearing down on us, the flaws in our logic are beginning to show. But we are learning. Arabitg points out, with pride, that the new plantings not only survived the low water levels but have spread, by themselves, along the lake’s edge. He describes the Friends’ next big project of dredging the southern end of the lake to retain more water, for longer, in dry times. He, along with his colleagues, it strikes me, also demonstrate the difference we can make when we start to really pay attention to how water moves.
In the end, I learn from Jim Bays, President of SoUL, that Round Lake is, on average, only about five feet deep (though, he allows, there’s a significant layer of sediment built up at the bottom, so it’s pretty hard to know for certain). Hardly the underwater wonderland I’d fantasized about, and probably not so great for a swim. But, as I gulp down the solace of my well-iced water bottle, I have to admit that Round Lake has more than enough depth to set me dreaming. About beauty, resilience, and the changing ways we account for the world’s most precious resource. And maybe, just a little, about alligator farms.
SINKING FEELING: A pipe that drained Round Lake into nearby Mirror Lake goes back to the 1920s.
Lizzi Bougatsos, Idolize the Burn 2022, Brass chandelier, red wax, silver, candles, resin dipped toe shoes, and wood. Courtesy of the artist and James Fuentes Gallery, NY.
By Josh Bradley & Ray Roa
C CL Recommends `
THU 05
C Fea w/Hovercar/Eleni and The Uprising Fea embodies the spirit of San Antonio’s Latina punk scene, but it can rock the theater, too, as evidenced by the band’s contribution to “Fabulous Monsters,” a production set in the ‘70s punk revolution. Drummer Phanie Diaz, bassist Jenn Alva and vocalist Letty Martinez have been praised by Rolling Stone and NPR, plus earned kudos from Florida man and punk fairy godfather Iggy Pop. The band (FFO Bikini Kill, Generacion Suicida, Alice Bag) headlines a gig supported by Tampa grunge-rock duo Hovercar and pop songwriter Eleni and the Uprising. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa)
FRI 06
Cowgirl Clue w/White Ring/Mgna Crrrta
A Texas star in her own right, Ashley Clue rode onto the scene in 2019 with her viral song “A Figure 8” from a debut album Icebreaker, and creates an ethereal, electric mix of pop, jungle, country, rock, dance, and techno through hypnotizing celestial sounds. A year or so since the alt-pop better known as Cowgirl Clue artist released her second album, Rodeo Star, she kicks off a fall tour at this space rave for anyone ready to saddle up and glitter down. (Orpheum, Tampa) Anthony Ozdemir
Don Omar To start his summer, Omar announced a cancer diagnosis, and while the Puerto Rican rapper didn’t specify what type it was, the 46-year-old soon shared that the operation to remove it was a success—and that he was cancer-free. It all unfolded with enough in time for last month’s “Back To Reggaeton” tour kickoff, during which he runs through a nearly 40-song career retrospective, including tracks from his latest album, last year’s Forever Kin g. (Amalie Arena, Tampa)
C Front 242 w/Kontravoid While endless academic debates could be had about who’s the most important act in industrial music, few would dispute that Front 242 are the all-time greatest—and those few would be wrong. Musically, the Belgian EBM god has long had that target on lock. But Front 242 has always been so much more than a basic band. Like the Kraftwerk of industrial music, its artistic vision has made it not simply the gold standard of their genre but one of the most fiercely forward-minded and conceptual acts in modern history. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg)—Bao Le-Huu
Know Your Enemy: A Tribute to Rage Against The Machine w/Anthill Cinema/ Stick & Ditty/DJ BC Perhaps getting a massive supergroup of Tampa Bay music
scene regulars together for a Rage Against The Machine tribute show will soothe the pain of not having an Ol’ Dirty Sundays to look forward to on Sunday. Before Know Your Enemy convenes, band members’ respective groups (Stick & Ditty, Anthill Cinema) kick things off with their normal rap and fusion schtick, along with cuts from Anthill Cinema’s recent revamp of a 2017 EP Nobody. (Crowbar, Ybor City)
Taiki Nulight The University Area’s TK Lounge is Tampa’s unofficial dubstep clubhouse and it welcomes Erka Chinbayer all the way from Brighton and Hove, less than 50 miles from where the EDM subgenre was born. The Mongolian-born producer better known as Taiki Nulight knows his way around bass, but mixes in loads of house and garage into his hybrid sound. (TK Lounge, Tampa)
SAT 07
C Amphitheatre & Club Hedo reunion: / Huda Hudia w/Mondo/more Ybor City’s Club Hedo closed in 2006 (Bradley’s is at 7th Avenue address now). In 2016, a fire burned the Amphitheatre down. For one night only, clubbers and staff from both nightlife mainstays take a trip down memory lane and reunite. In a true throwback to the late-’90s and early-2000s, the two-room party—featuring sets from DJs Huda Hudia, Mondo, Matt The Bratt, and more—will be broadcast live on the radio (93.3-FM) and hosted by none other than Brian Fink from the days when WFLA was known as the Power Pig. (The Ritz, Ybor City)
C Daniela Soledade and Nate Najar Smooth as an elevator ride to Olympus, Daniela Soledade’s voice takes listeners to the clouds and gently tucks them in under a cover of serenity. Though Soledade has released only two studio albums, Pretty World and A Moment of You, the Brazilian-born singer-songwriter has seemingly cemented herself as a bilingual, modern-day queen of bossa nova with an uncanny ability to find the pocket and bring fans along. In this age of innovation and constant musical creation, Soledade—who heads to Paris and the U.K. in the coming weeks with guitarist Nate Najar— boasts a soul-soothing classic sound driven by a rare, robust, raw vocal talent. (Hough Hall at Palladium Theater, St. Petersburg)—AO
Hibiscus w/Nervous Surface/ Sevenstone/Cyphvin/Sure Thing! After releasing its first few rollicking singles last year, the youthful alt-rock outfit released its debut album Adolescence in July. Hibiscus’ record is loaded with Green Day-esque guitar licks, hefty bass work that you didn’t know you needed, and even a rerecorded version of last year’s “Hermione” with cleaner guitar work and vocals. The five-piece’s Hooch and Hive gig ain’t a release party, but with a relatively slim list of original songs, don’t be surprised if it’s treated like one. After all, you only release your debut album once. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa)
THU SEP. 05–THU SEP. 12
C Laura Jane Grace & The Mississippi Medicals w/Catbite/Taylor Hollingsworth Just over a year after shooting the album art for her latest solo LP behind 687 Central Ave. in St. Petersburg, Laura Jane Grace is back at Floridian Social to not only support Hole In My Head (which the Alternative Press calls one of the best of the year so far), but also show off a new project. The Mississippi Medicals includes Grace’s new wife, comedian Paris Campbell, plus punk icon Mikey Erg and Matt Patton who plays bass in Drive-By Truckers. Grace, 43, recently crammed new Mississippi Medicals tunes into a loud NPR Tiny Desk set that included favorites from her time in Against Me!, too. Alabama folkie Taylor Hollingsworth (an alum of Conor Oberst’s Mystic Valley Band) opens the show along with party-starting rock and roll band Catbite. (Floridian Social, St. Petersburg)
Powerwolf w/Unleash the Archers On its first-ever, 12-date U.S. tour, Powerwolf—a German power-metal outfit described as one of the most captivating, congregational live bands in that genre—has been plugging a new album Wake Up The Wicked , along with a pretty healthy career retrospective, minus the first two albums. Unleash the Archers—a Canadian metal quintet also on the heels of a new record—opens. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg)
US 103.5 Country Jam: Cody Jinks w/Jake Worthington Pop country loves sad songs, too. Cody Jinks just might do one of the lowliest (“David”) at this gig for the Bay area’s country-radio giant, WFUS 103.5-FM, and don’t be surprised to see a somewhat eclectic crowd at the old Sun Dome. The 44-year-old used to front metal bands back home in Texas and recently covered Faith No More’s “Take This Bottle” with much fanfare, too. (Yuengling Center, Tampa)
SUN 08
C Humid Seance Tour: Akasha System w/ Justin Depth/Severed+Said/Ovan Odero John Touchton is a “synthesist” raised in the Pentecostal church who can hypnotize listeners with his special brand of Floridian electro that’s evolved into a trio of singles from a forthcoming album, End Time Loop. Look for Touchton, better known as Severed+Said, to play tracks from the the cinematic, dronedriven, ambient and head-rocking outing at this no-cover show supported by local producers of eco-techno (Akasha System), ambient IDM (Justin Depth) and playful electro-pop (Ovan Odero). (The Bends, St. Petersburg)
In The Pocket A press kit describes David Guevara and friends as a group that “merges the styles of trained jazz
on page 39
JUSTIN HIGUCHI,
Cowgirl Clue
DAVE DECKER
musicians with a flair for the eccentric,” but it doesn’t rule out other genres, either. Guevara tends to throw a little bit of bluegrass into the mix, and saxophonist Eduardo Marichales can embody just about any fellow saxman’s spirit, whether it’s the fierceness of Clarence Clemons or the smoothness of Grover Washington Jr. The band is a regular at Corner Club where it lands on Sunday. (Corner Club, Seminole Heights)
The Lonely Ones w/The Hand of Reason/Smile Deadly/Six Eyes/Strays of the World/DePrime Despite just five years of existence, The Lonely Ones have already been praised by Sir Brian May for the Columbus-based alt-rock quartet’s cover of Queen’s “Flash.” The indie band’s harmonic new single “The Bottom” deals with trying not to drown in a world “where alcohol flows like a great river,” so make sure to get your drinks at the Mug’s bar before that song is played on Sunday night. Think of it as last call if you must. (Brass Mug, Tampa)
C Mrenc w/Nora’s Breakfast Club/Bad Sci-Fi Before Copeland and Anberlin put their own small Florida towns on the map, there was Nora’s Breakfast Club, a slepton Lakeland indie-rock outfit that released three albums of shoe-gazing dream-pop. The band, which tried a reunion in 2012, is back in the studio (The Vanguard Room, helmed by Aaron Marsh of Copeland, mind you) and working on new music that hopefully pours out of the PA at this gig alongside Central Florida’s lord of art-popnoir, Mrenc. (Union Hall, Lakeland)
C Saxkixave w/Alfred Banks/Albert Allenback Alfred Banks and Albert Allenback aren’t the latest set of lawyers with a clever TV commercial, but a hiphop duo known as Saxkixave. Banks is a Grammy-nominated rapper, and Allenback is a world-class instrumentalist who’s provided the Louisiana emcee with a new canvas to paint on. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa)
TUE 10
C Midge Ure Bob Geldof wasn’t the only mastermind behind Live Aid, you know. Right by his side the entire time was Ultravox’s Midge Ure, who also helped Geldof dream up “Do They Know It’s Christmastime?” the year before. It’s anyone’s guess if the charity single will be part of the Scotsman’s intimate gig at Bayboro, but the last time he was in town, he joined Howard Jones onstage for the song (which Jones did not originally appear on) following an opening set for his fellow ‘80s hitmaker. Ahead of this show, Ure shared with Creative Loafing Tampa Bay how his future pal David Bowie’s “Ziggy Stardust” tour was (unsurprisingly) the best gig he ever saw. Read his full comment at cltampa. com/music. (Bayboro Brewing, St. Petersburg)
THU 12
Korn w/Gojira/Spiritbox Thirty years following the release of its debut album, Korn kicks off its late summer tour at the old Gary amphitheatre, and while nothing has been released yet, guitarist Brian Welch promises that the numetal outfit is working on the heaviest material it’s ever recorded. He said that whatever’s next will be released independently, and will serve as a return to its roots. Don’t expect to hear any of the new material early on Thursday night (assuming you snagged non-resale tickets), but hey: Gojira and Spiritbox are on the bill as well. (MidFlorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa)
C Loud on 7th Kick Off Concert: Ree Baby w/BeSelfiss/Kaottic Karma/Demolition Mann/Lil Timme/Hyfa/Semeria/Dorian James/Da Badest Lyrik/Raul/more Loud On 7th Festival technically kicks off on Monday with Trap Trivia, followed by karaoke (Tuesday) and the producers vs. rappers showdown on Wednesday, but the first concert is next Thursday with a robust lineup of rappers that represent the taste of festival founder Aych, who recently wrapped up a 18 year run for his Bay area cypher. (Crowbar, Ybor City)
See an extended version of this listing via cltampa.com/music.
Laura Jane Grace
Instrumental music takes all shapes and forms, and two Floridian heavyweights of the genre come together in the living room next month. A year after releasing its futurelooking debut full-length, Lyght Years , Twyn comes to Tampa in support of a new EP, Live and Improvised
The duo—Jason Matthews and Aaron Glueckauf, alum of groups like Electric Kif and Lemon City Trio—skip sample packs and instead build their palette of sounds from scratch. While they’re both trained jazz musicians, Twyn’s music leans more into dance music, with the duo sprinkling influences (pop, hip-hop, R&B) into songs driven by Glueckauf’s drums and the corner of Korgs and modulators that surrounds Matthews. Expect Twyn to turn their record into something different at the Far Forest where Tampa harp-and-drum duo Katara, fresh of its debut LP and a anthemic new single “Earrings,” plays support.
Tickets to see Twyn play Far Forest in Tampa on Thursday, Oct. 3 are on sale now for $20. See Josh Bradley’s weekly roundup of new concerts coming to Tampa Bay below.—Ray Roa
CeeLo Green Saturday, Dec. 7. 7:30 p.m. $45 & up. Ferguson Hall at Straz Center for the Performing Arts, Tampa
Honeymoon Island Bluegrass Festival: Fast Track w/more Saturday, Dec. 7. 11 a.m. $18 + $4 park entry. Honeymoon Island, Dunedin
Countess LuAnn Sunday, Dec. 8. 8 p.m. $40 & up. Event Center at Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino, Tampa
Empress of
By Caroline DeBruhl
Dear Oracle, my partner and I have owned our business for 15 years. While we have been able to be incredibly successful, one issue that we’ve always had has been with staff. We’ve had several employees who were just crazy, could not take feedback, or were lazy and had serious attitude problems. We pride ourselves on taking a “worker’s first” position, like offering $15 an hour before most people did and higher commission rates than most stores, but still, it seems like we’re only drawing in negativity and insanity. Do the cards suggest a way to draw in positivity and light?—Business Babes
Cards: The Seeker (reversed), Eight of Swords, Five of Pentacles (reversed), The Empress (reversed)
Dear BB, you know, when we find our relationships with different people to have the same kinds of problems over time, it might serve us to look inward and see how we fit into the pattern.
I’ve probably written about work more than any other subject in this column, and you are the first boss plagued with a sea of toxic employees over the years. While it may be true that you have had a string of bad luck, it does seem suspect to have “several” employees described as “crazy” or “lazy” or with “bad attitudes” who “cannot take feedback.”
Are some employees lazy, crazy, or bad at their job? Sure. People are people. But personally, I’ve had more bosses slander employees than I’ve had crazy coworkers.
I do believe you are honestly looking into this problem and don’t understand what’s happening. With the Major Arcana of The Seeker and The Empress reversed, I think you are genuine in your soul searching and view yourself as the just and fair Empress. I believe you hold the ideas of “worker’s first” sacrosanct. What I am unsure about, either through your letter or the cards, is how (or if) those ideas translate.
You and your partner are suffering. With the Eight of Swords, you feel trapped and hopeless; with the wintery Five of Pentacles, there is a sense of scarcity and hunger. But both these cards can be illusions. The Eight of Swords is often a cage of our own making, while the Five of Pentacles can make us feel like things will never get better, and we lash out, desperate.
ORACLE OF YBOR
Send your questions to oracle@cltampa.com or DM @theyboracle on Instagram
(With that Five reversed, I also wonder how the money is doing. You say it’s been “incredibly successful,” but I wonder if you’ve felt squeezed for some time and are lashing out.)
Both the Eight of Swords and Five of Pentacles suggest an inward focus, as does The Seeker, so I would start there. What do all of these negative relationships have in common? How have you handled yourself throughout them? Was there any common turning point? Any similar fights or issues? Try to be honest
with yourself. Perhaps you’ll discover behaviors that invite the atmosphere you’re looking for. Dear Oracle, I’ve been making music for more than two decades and while I’ve recorded some things and played a few shows, I want to take it more seriously. What advice do the cards have for me?—Makin’ Time for Music Cards: The Emperor, The Magician (reversed), The Hermit, The Sun Dear Makin’ Time, I’ve said this before, but I will say it again: if you have the need to create art inside of you, you must nurture it because if you don’t, it’ll rot and turn you into a real asshole. You should be taking your music much more seriously because—and I cannot stress this enough—there’s no way this could be a more positive reading. If I had faked this, I wouldn’t have made it this good. Let’s get to it: Making music, for you, is what you’re supposed to be doing. The Emperor is determined and can handle obstacles because he knows his true path. This is your true path. You have the determination to make this happen, which is important. Plenty of artists are talented, but for one reason or another (rejection, burnout, life changes), they give up. You have the power to see this through.
You probably also have the talent. The Magician is a channeler—he can move things from the unknown and bring them into the physical present. That’s what creating art is: channeling the interior into the exterior. The
Magician is the master at this, which suggests you know what you’re doing and you’ve known for a long time.
With the light of The Hermit, you also know that creating art is a profoundly fulfilling pursuit for you. It might be your spiritual path in the sense that it enriches your spirit. The Hermit is up on his mountain, following his dreams and connecting to the universe. He is doing exactly what he is meant to do.
And then we have The Sun. Joyous, successful, light of the world Sun. You should be making music. It’s what you’ve been put on this earth to do; you have the grit to stick through the hard shit, you’re good at it, and it makes you happy. So pursue this, seriously.
Does this mean you should quit your day job tomorrow? Fuck no. Artists need health insurance. But it does mean that you should reprioritize your time and energy. You might need to go into “hermit mode” and go to a cabin and write an album in two weeks. You might need to go to a professional recording studio or plan out an old fashion tour or hire some marketing kid to get your shit into the TikTok algorithm. (I don’t really know how getting discovered works for musicians, but there are people who do. Talk to them.)
Even if you don’t make it to rock star level, even if you’re just producing to small acclaim, you need to be doing this. If you know what can make you happy and spiritually fulfilled, then fuck it, man, go out and do it.
See more of the Oracle of Ybor and learn about her services via carolinedebruhl.com.
What eats you
By Dan Savage
I’m a queer cis woman in my late-30s with a problem: I don’t like having my pussy eaten. This isn’t about me being uncomfortable with the way my pussy looks or smells or tastes. I just don’t like the sensation. At best, I get close but eventually plateau, which is frustrating. At worst, it feels slimy, like a slug exploring my genitals. Also, being on my back with my knees up reminds me of being at the gynecologist, which is not sexy. In the end, it’s just not my thing. But the actual problem for me is modern men. They are obsessed with eating pussy and get very pouty when you don’t think it’s the best. I like plenty of other things—being held and talked dirty to, light teasing with their mouths, fingering, etc.—but they all want to get me off orally. I get a lot of, “You just haven’t had it done right,” or, “Wait until I do it for you,” and then they get mad when (surprise!) I don’t like this thing I don’t like. I tried dating a couple of men who “don’t eat pussy,” but those men didn’t seem to care at all about getting a woman off. And while I’m queer, it feels like cunnilingus is even more important when you’re hooking up with other women/AFABs. Honestly, I feel like faking it with new partners and enjoying my actual orgasms alone would be easier than opening about this to new people. Being treated like a freak has turned sex, which is supposed to be fun, into something that makes me feel bad about myself.
receiving oral sex. Which means, if you don’t wanna spend the rest of your life faking orgasms before sneaking away to get yourself off (which sounds worse than having to explain that receiving oral isn’t what you want), you’re gonna have to use your words.
SAVAGE LOVE
Pro-tip: don’t string weak-ass words together into mealymouthed statements like, “Sometimes I get close from oral but I’ve never gotten off from oral and there are other things we could do if that’s okay?” The kind of guys you wanna fuck—who are, ironically enough, the kind of guys who do wanna eat pussy— are highly likely to interpret a statement like that as a cry for help. Many of them may have been with women in the past who were uncomfortable with their own genitals and/or had never been with a guy who loved eating pussy, WILL, and thanks to their persistence—in offering oral over and over again—dozens or hundreds of other women overcame their hangups and discovered that they loved being on the receiving end of oral sex. That is how it sometimes goes down.
Because mixed into the pile of modern men who seem obsessed with eating pussy, WILL, you will find a small number of modern men who are only pretending to be obsessed. And in that pile of queer women (and AFABs) you might wanna fuck or date, WILL, you will find a small number of women (and AFABs) who enjoy everything about sapphic sex except the eating pussy part.
The kind of partner you want is someone who goes through the motions of pushing back when you say you don’t want to receive oral sex (“Wait until I do it for you!”) but who doesn’t push back for long. In other words, WILL, you want someone who’s relieved to learn they don’t have to eat your pussy but whose relief isn’t obvious. If you can own that—if you can admit to wanting a partner who either wants to eat your pussy but doesn’t insist on it or someone does a very good impression of someone wants to eat your pussy—you’ll have an easier time tolerating the pushback you’re inevitably going to receive when you share this fact about yourself.
Because that pushback is a good sign, WILL, a sign that this person is worth
Any advice would be appreciated. At the very least, Dan, maybe you could make a public service announcement telling people that being GGG for a cis woman doesn’t just mean eating her pussy, it means showing a genuine interest in who she is as an individual sexual being. Wish I Liked Licks
Let’s get that PSA out of the way: Not everyone likes receiving oral! There are cis men who don’t like having their cocks sucked! There are cis women who don’t like having their pussies eaten! There are trans men who don’t like having their pussies eaten or their neophalluses sucked and trans women who don’t like having their cocks sucked or their neovaginas eaten and enbies who don’t like having their genitals—whatever form they take—licked or sucked! People are allowed to dislike things! Even things you’re good at! Even things most people like! Being GGG means listening to people when they tell you what they like! And doing those things! If they’re things you like too! It’s really not hard!
I hope that helps, WILL, but since PSAs never reach 100% of their target demo, you’ll still have to tell new partners you dislike
But that’s not how it’s gonna go down for you.You don’t have issues with how your pussy looks, smells, or tastes and you’ve been with plenty of men who loved eating pussy. You’ve give it a try… again and again and again… and it’s not for you. So, when you’re with a new sex partner, WILL, you need to hammer that point home with a clear and emphatic statement like this: “You’re one of the good guys—I hate straight guys who don’t go down on women—but plenty of people who were really good at eating pussy have gone down on me and it does nothing for me. Not only doesn’t it turn me on, it turns me the fuck off. And that’s not what either of us is here for. So, about those fingers of yours…”
Zooming out for a second, WILL, you say you’re frustrated by modern men who seem to believe eating pussy is synonymous with meeting a woman’s needs—and you’re proof that isn’t true for all women—but you’ve found that retrograde men who loudly refuse to eat pussy are worse, as those men don’t care about getting a woman off.
I have some good news for you, WILL: your choices aren’t limited to guys who won’t shut up about how much they love eating pussy and guys who won’t shut up about how much they hate it.
the time and effort required to convince them that, no, you really and truly don’t want to receive oral sex.
My partner and I have been dating for almost a year, and everything’s been amazing—this is the best relationship I’ve had in a long time. We have a Dom/Sub dynamic, and he really wants me to get into anal play, something I’m new to.
Early in our relationship, we tried, but I was on a medication that made me nauseous, so it was unpleasant. I’m no longer on that medication. He hasn’t pushed the subject since, until the other day when he tried to insert a plug without much warning. I told him I need more comfort and preparation before we dive into that kind of play, especially since I’m a novice at anal. I also confessed I’ve been dealing with some GI issues. He made it clear that he eventually wants to fuck my ass with his giant cock, and he seems to think I’m just making excuses, and not trying hard enough. Which to be fair, I haven’t done much solo exploration with plugs. And while he hasn’t been forceful, he mentioned that not progressing with anal could be a dealbreaker for him. Is that fair? Can anal really be a dealbreaker? How do I navigate this without compromising my comfort while still being a good partner?—Advice Negotiating Anal Leeway
Anal can be a dealbreaker—anything can be a dealbreaker—and Liz Lemon never said dealbreakers had to be fair. But dealbreakers cut both ways. Meaning, your partner is free to say, “I’m gonna break up with you if I can’t fuck your ass with my giant dick,” ANAL, but you’re free to say to him, “If you pressure me to do things that don’t feel good—and trying to shove a plug in my ass without warning did not feel good—I’m gonna dump your ass before we can figure out whether your dick feels good in mine.” As prices of admission go, ANAL, having butt sex that doesn’t feel good is too steep a price to pay. Going without anal sex, on the other hand, is a price many have paid to be with someone they loved. If your “amazing” new partner with the giant dick isn’t willing to contemplate going without anal for you—if he can’t even entertain paying that price of admission—he probably doesn’t deserve your ass. P.S. To make someone feel excited about exploring anal sex—to get them to open up—you have to make them feel physically and emotionally safe. Shoving a toy into someone’s ass without warning is great way to make them feel physically unsafe; threatening to break up with someone if they can’t take your giant dick up their ass is a great way to make them feel emotionally unsafe. If your boyfriend can’t see that he’s doing this all wrong, ANAL, it’s not just your ass he can’t be trusted with. Got problems? Yes, you do! Email your question for the column to mailbox@savage.love! Or record your question for the Savage Lovecast at savage.love/askdan! Podcasts, columns and more at Savage.Love.
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63 Song about searching for sweaters?
Indy winner Bobby
Additional
Black cuckoos
Color of flax
Young suitor 78 Best place in Idaho to find garment parts?
With 94
56 N.
The Sun Devils: abbr.
Eager
in movements 49 Fairy-tale creature
1980-81 bribery scandal
53 Film that originated the term “costume epic”?
55 Singer who’s always in fashion? 57 Hangs ten, e.g. 58 Vegas VIP 59 Soft drink 60 Sol followers 62 Doofus
