Creative Loafing Tampa — September 14, 2023

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PUBLISHER James Howard

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ray Roa

DIGITAL EDITOR Colin Wolf

MANAGING EDITOR Kyla Fields

THEATER CRITIC Jon Palmer Claridge

FILM & TV CRITIC John W. Allman

IN-HOUSE WITCH Caroline DeBruhl

CONTRIBUTORS Josh Bradley, Arielle Stevenson, Chelsea Zukwoski

PHOTOGRAPHERS Jack Cymbryla, Dave Decker, Kimberly DeFalco, Isaiah Stephens, Chelsea Zukwoski

FALL INTERN Inquire by emailing rroa@cltampa.com

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CREATIVE DIRECTOR Jack Spatafora

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ILLUSTRATORS Dan Perkins, Cory Robinson, Bob Whitmore

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MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND EVENTS DIRECTOR

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MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND EVENTS COORDINATOR Kristin Bowman

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Music: Tampa Bay

emails were overwhelmingly against the mil increase.

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40

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Concert

City Council says no to Tampa Mayor’s proposed budget, p. 20.

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EDITORIAL POLICY — Creative Loafing Tampa is a publication covering public issues, the arts and entertainment. In our pages appear views from across the political and social spectrum. They do not necessarily represent the views

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The

7th heaven

Loud On 7th wrapped last Sunday, capping off nearly a week of concerts, showcases, networking events, beat battles, trivia nights and more. Cultivated by Aych, a Tampa rapper and promoter who’s been working in Ybor City for the last two decades, the festival hopes to bring music fans from across the country to the historic district. See more photos via cltampa.com/ slideshows.

—Ray Roa

Photos by Jack Cymbryla

do this

High visibility

When you see a bunch of women on bicycles come Sunday, slow your roll, then bow down. They’re riding as part of the worldwide Fancy Women Bike Ride, which started as a casual affair nine years ago before evolving into a full-blown effort to elevate women from various social and economic backgrounds by making them visible as they reclaim and carve out safer bike routes in more than 200 cities around the globe. Tampa’s ride is an hour-long and leaves from downtown’s Perry Harvey Sr. Park, then visits The Curt and University of Tampa before coming back. Fancy

Women Bike Ride. Sunday, Sept. 17, 10 a.m. Perry Harvey Sr. Park, 1000 E Harrison St., Tampa. fancywomenbikeride.com—Ray Roa

Tampa Bay's best things to do from September 14 - 20

Moon song

Most folks know about the Lunar New Year celebration that happens each winter, but millions of people throughout East and Southeast Asia celebrate another holiday in the fall to honor the harvest season and the autumn equinox. Clearwater’s Saigon Night Market—a weekly event packed with dozens of street food-inspired vendors and karaoke—hosts a local rendition of the widely-celebrated Mid-Autumn Festival this weekend in Pinellas Park. Both days feature DJs and cultural performances—including the iconic lion dance—in the England Brothers Park’s bandshell, dozens of vendors specializing in Vietnamese, Laotian, Cambodian, Filipino and Chinese fare, a pho eating contest, plus bounce houses and face painters for the kiddos.“In

Vietnamese households, the Mid-Autumn Festivals are typically for the kids. Adults would give us toys or a lantern to walk around the village, watch the moon and play with other kids,” Saigon Night Market founder Lew Nguyen says about his personal relationship with the holiday. And unlike its weekly market in Clearwater, this special celebration will have beer for purchase, making it a true party. Mid-Autumn Festival at Clearwater Saigon Night Market. Saturday-Sunday, Sept. 16-17. 3 p.m.-9 p.m. & 2 p.m.-9 p.m. $10-$15, free for kids ages 8 & under. England Brothers Park, 5010 81st Ave. N, Pinellas Park. @saigonnightmarket on Instagram—Kyla Fields

We have the meats

Sandwich lovers, history buffs and science nerds, Tampa’s Museum of Science and Industry, or Mosi (stylized “MOSI”), celebrates Tampa’s signature dish this weekend. This nighttime party at the museum features live entertainment, a culinary competition to find out which participating restaurant dishes out the best sammy, raffles, beverage pairings, and a science demonstration that aims to “uncover the secrets behind the perfect Cuban sandwich.” Different scientific principles up for discussion include: the physics of baking bread, the chemistry of sandwich fillings, plus the biology of taste and flavor. Participants in the Cuban sandwich competition are the museum’s food and drink partner Zydeco Brew Werks, Smokin’ Cuban, Inside The Box, Gaspar’s Patio Bar and Grille, Cracked Pepper Café and Mickey’s Subs, while the judges who will determine its winner include Temple Terrace Mayor Andy Ross, Tampa Bay Times writer Maggie Duffy and radio host Pat Donovan, among others. Science of the Cuban Sandwich. Saturday, Sept. 16. 6 p.m.-9 p.m. $20$25. MOSI, 4801 E Fowler Ave., Tampa. mosi.org—Kyla Fields

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Sausage party

It’s finally time to break out that lederhosen again. From craft breweries to Busch Gardens, Oktoberfest takes over just about any business where beer is sold and celebrated in Tampa Bay. While these Oktoberfests usually include massive steins filled with German beer, the occasional schnitzel and live music, the German American Society of Pinellas County hosts a real-deal celebration at its Pinellas Park headquarters each fall. Folks attending this traditional Oktoberfest can expect polka music, cultural dances, a wide variety of beers, a spread of homemade German food (pretzels, bratwurst, potato pancakes, etc.), stein-hoisting competitions, local vendors and even a “Kinder Corner,” where kiddos can play and make crafts. If you’re looking for an Oktoberfest celebration happening this weekend, we suggest hitting up Coppertail Brewing and The Independent Bar and Cafe in Tampa (p. 40) or heading across the bridge to Green Bench Brewing for its massive beer parties. Visit cltampa.com/food to see more. German American Society of Pinellas County’s Oktoberfest. Friday-Saturday, Sept. 29-30 & Friday-Saturday, Oct. 6-7. Noon & 5 p.m. $8-$10. German American Society of Pinellas County, 8098 66th St. N, Pinellas Park. germantampa.com—Kyla Fields

Las películas

Folks from every corner of Latin America have diverse opinions and perspectives, and the filmmakers and creatives behind 2023’s Tampa Bay Latin Film Festival share theirs on the big screen—Creative Pinellas’ big screen that is. The event features an opening ceremony with live music and snacks, two blocks of film-watching plus an intermission and short discussion between them. Showcased works include the comedic short “Fairy Rice Mother” from Puerto Rican director Joelle Velez, Franco Vidal’s salsa-centric “Hot Latin Nights” and “Nervios,” Frank Roméu’s tale about a Cuban immigrant navigating American citizenship. “By exploring Latin America’s emerging and established talent in film through documentaries or short Latin American films to the Tampa Bay community, this festival will hopefully further a dialogue that will create greater understanding and empathy for others, while growing the network of advocates for a thriving community,” TBLFF organizers write. Although all screenings at this year’s Tampa Bay Latin Film Festival are free, it’s recommended to RSVP via Eventbrite.com. Tampa Bay Latin Film Festival. Saturday, Sept. 16. 4 p.m.-8 p.m. Free. The Auditorium at Creative Pinellas, 12211 Walsingham Rd., Largo. @tbliffestival on Instagram—Kyla Fields

I found the fountain of youth Young Gen X-ers and elder millennials, listen up. There’s a new convention coming, and it celebrates our favorite decade, complete with a seriously start-studded list of 50 celebrity guests from across the 1990s entertainment spectrum. There’s a Disney princess reunion with the voices of Ariel (Jodi Benson), Belle (Paige O’Hara), Jasmine (Linda Larkin), Pocahontas (Judy Kuhn) and Meg (Susan Egan). Nearly all of the main cast of “Boy Meets World” will be there, from Danielle Fishel (Topanga) and Rider Strong (Shawn Hunter) to William Daniels, who played Mr. Feeney. Witchy ‘90s kids like me will jump at the chance to meet Kimberly J. Brown and Daniel Kountz from “Halloweentown” plus Sabrina and the aunties from “Sabrina, the Teenage Witch” (pictured). There are also stars from “Saved by the Bell,” “Full House,” “Family Matters,” “Charmed" and "90210.” Musical guests from Backstreet Boys (Nick Carter and AJ McClean), N*Sync (Joey Fatone) and TLC (T-Boz and Chilli) will be there, too. The bar scene is going to be fun after the festival closes. 90’s Con. FridaySunday, Sept. 15-17. $40 & up. Tampa Convention Center, 333 S Franklin St., Tampa. thats4entertainment.com

—Chelsea Zukowski

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POLITICS ISSUES OPINION

Knock, knock

Housing organizer Nick Carey announces bid for St. Pete City Council.

By Arielle Stevenson

In February 2022, over a hundred people rallied on the steps of St. Petersburg City Hall, demanding rent control. The sound of people protesting outside could be heard inside City Council chambers during the council’s weekly meeting. Faith in Florida organizer Nick Carey spoke to council members about their refusal to acknowledge the housing crisis, even if through only symbolic means.

“We are demonstrating because we’ve petitioned our government in every means we know how to and we need help now,” Carey said at that meeting. “The people outside right now need to know that the plan is to stop them from being displaced.”

Carey was outside City Hall weeks later when many camped out on the sidewalk in protest of the city’s continued inaction on the housing crisis. He’s pushed for local ownership of the historic Gas Plant district redevelopment, even as the contract was awarded to an out-of-town developer. Now Carey tells Creative Loafing Tampa Bay he’s running for City Council.

Council member Ed Montanari, who voted against many housing justice initiatives Carey and others have brought forward, is being termlimited off of council. Carey is running for Montanari’s District 3 seat.

Carey and his wife Aileen moved to St. Pete from North Carolina in 2017. Radicalized by the murder of George Floyd and Breona Taylor in 2020, Carey left his career as a chemist to organize for Faith in Florida. He spoke with CL via phone about why he’s running for office and why he believes in guaranteed housing for all now more than ever.

St. Petersburg’s primary election is on Aug. 20, 2024.

What was the impetus for your decision to run?

The big moment for me was when we were pushing for rent control…There were about 60-plus people at council just begging to not be left out, just wanting to be part of the city. There were folks on Council more upset that we were trying to use a different process…than the fact that folks were in danger of being homeless. For me, it’s about making sure the people dealing with the issues facing our city are centered in the conversations about what the solutions look like.

How did you get involved in St. Pete’s housing justice movement?

One of my Faith in Florida statewide priorities is reducing gun violence…We tried to extend that in early 2021 and keep the conversation going, particularly in Black communities that can see the equivalent of a mass shooting every week…We canvassed people knocking on their doors and saying hey, St. Pete is getting $45 million (in American Rescue Plan Act or ARPA funds). How would you like to see it spent? Violence was definitely up there but far and away everyone was talking about, “I can’t afford my

actionable items regarding housing, what have they done?

I think we should acknowledge that, basically, any local government and Florida is fighting with one arm tied behind their back because of preemption. That being said, the threat of preemption is used as an excuse for why we shouldn’t do certain things far too often. I think rent control is the prime example. Even now, it’s like see, we told you that rent control was gonna get preempted. I think that’s a way to shift the narrative away from the fact they didn’t really put any pressure on [the state] not to preempt it.

infrastructure angle. We need to look at what other cities around the world are doing, who are in a similar situation to St. Pete. We live on a shrinking peninsula.

ELECTIONS

If you’re elected, you’ll join several other housing justice-forward council members; Richie Floyd, Brother John Muhammad, and Deborah Figgs-Sanders. What would that mean for the council to have another person focused on housing at the grassroots level?

rent, I don’t know where I’m gonna go.” It was really the community that told us that housing was the thing that they were worried about.

You’ve mentioned that St. Pete is more inclusive in its policies than many other cities. That may be true but in terms of actual

What are your goals if elected to City Council? What are you worried might stand in your way?

Part of the reason I’m running is that St. Pete is starting to see a very interesting conglomeration of grassroots people in office. I want to add to those numbers. District 3 currently has a city council member who’s on the opposite side of council members Deborah Figgs-Sanders, Richie Floyd, and Brother John Muhammad. I think this is a real opportunity to take that seat in a much more progressive direction.

How did you end up in St. Pete? What brought you to work with Faith in Florida?

My wife Aileen and I moved here right after she finished graduate school. At the time, I was actually a chemist in pharmaceuticals. We were drawn to St. Pete by the people and the beautiful weather…We found Allendale Methodist Church and it has been central to connecting my faith and the idea of justice. In 2020, Aileen and I were both out of work and Allendale helped us with temporary jobs so we could pay our mortgage. It really informed where I wanted to go with my life. It was Pastor Andy Oliver who connected me to Faith in Florida.

If elected, will you continue pushing for local ownership in the historic Gas Plant district redevelopment?

Absolutely, the Gas Plant is the biggest example of how we give far too much power to developers to decide basic things like what our city looks like. What can the city do to take back control of basic infrastructure?…One of the things that cities like Seattle are pushing for with public development is not just jobs and housing, but also childcare.

One of the most important things to me is evaluating some of the processes and being more inclusive of having working people be able to participate and the types of decisions that are made about them. A big thing in District 3 is going to be around flooding infrastructure. Both from an environmental angle and an

Is there anything else you’re hoping to accomplish with this campaign?

Folks don’t feel included, they feel isolated. So it’s about approaching the conversation not just with compassion, but making sure people’s voices are heard.

“I think this is a real opportunity to take that seat in a much more progressive direction.”

WHO’S THERE? Nick Carey believes in guaranteed housing for all now more than ever.

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Hold up

Tampa City Council votes against Mayor Jane Castor’s proposed tax increase.

By Arielle Stevenson

Last week, after about eight hours of discussion, Tampa City Council voted 4-3 to keep Tampa’s millage rate at 6.2076% next year. The net zero increase comes after Mayor Jane Castor first presented the FY2024 budget on Aug. 3. Castor asked for a 1% increase to 7.2076%, which would’ve led to an estimated roughly 16% increase in taxes for Tampa property owners (others have estimated the increase as much higher). The City of Tampa’s Chief Financial Officer Dennis Rogero says the increase would cost the average Tampa homeowner only $240 annually.

There is some support for the increase, but many in the public oppose the increase. In the runup to the Sept. 5 budget vote and in public comment, those opposed noted inflation, higher property taxes, insurance hikes make it difficult to consider raising taxes. Chambers were full for the meeting, with an additional 100 people that waited downstairs to speak. Over 1,000 people streamed the meeting online. Council members say they’ve gotten thousands of emails, mostly against the tax increase.

“The emails were overwhelmingly against the mil increase,” Hurtak said at the meeting. “The small handful in support, all championed housing.”

Many in attendance wore red ribbons signifying support for housing. Residents from Belmont Heights and Jackson Heights asked that their communities not be forgotten as the housing crisis rages on.

“The top priority to me is housing whether you raise the millage or not,” Robin Lockett, Regional Director for Florida Rising, said at the meeting. “You pimp our community. You go to these apartments. Black people are calling and crying their hearts to you. You come here and vote a different way, support housing.”

On Aug. 24, councilman Bill Carlson motioned for Rogero to provide a FY2024 budget without the millage increase. The motion passed 6-1, with council woman Gwen Henderson opposed. Rogero wrote a memo to council last week that basically said he and staff weren’t going to do that.

In the memo to staff, Rogero wrote, “In order to provide a Revised Proposed FY2024 Budget that eliminates the above millage increase, the Mayor would have to unilaterally, and without any transparency, reduce expenditures in the FY2024 Proposed Budget without input from City Council and the public about which items should be cut.” Rogero continued, “Not only would that be inconsistent with Section 7.02 of the Charter, which expressly authorizes Council to make changes to the budget submitted by the Mayor, but it would be inconsistent with the collaborative process by which budgets have historically been developed and revised, and which we anticipated would occur in the FY2024 budget approval process.”

That means city council has roughly two weeks to comb through the budget for cuts. Eventually last week, there was a motion to reject the tax increase proposed by the mayor. Councilmembers Luis Viera, Gwen Henderson, and Alan Clendenin voted against the motion.

Councilman Viera did, at one point in the meeting, pitch reducing the millage increase

to just 0.3%, and called attention to the city’s need for new fire stations and other public safety issues, but his motion was shot down. In an email to Creative Loafing Tampa Bay, Viera wrote to make clear that he was opposed to the mayor’s proposed proposed tax increase.

“I had long said I opposed that tax or anything near it due to inflation, runaway local costs for families, etc. I asked the Chairman to motion for that and it passed 6-1 to kill the full mileage increase with me voting yes,” Viera wrote. Now, the approved millage rate can be reduced but it can’t increase. Council could, but probably won’t, use the rollback millage rate of 5.8%, which is as low as the millage can go.

“Tampa residents have trusted me to ensure their tax dollars being spent wisely,” Hurtak told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. “I look forward to approving a budget that puts our city on the path to a sustainable future.”

The very long budget is available via tampa. gov, and linked in the version of this story at cltampa.com. The second and final budget hearing is Sept. 19 at 5 p.m.

“The small handful in support, all championed housing.”

DOWN, NOT OUT: Council shot down the mayor’s budget, and now works to find cuts.

What’s good?

It’s time to confront Tampa’s low turnout by timing local and national elections together.

By Matt Newton

Across the bay from Tampa, the City of St. Petersburg had a problem: its citizens were not voting in municipal elections. A paltry 19.7% of voters in the city’s electorate turned out for its November 2019 contest.

Leaders hunted for a solution. One that made sense was to change the date of local elections to align with national midterm elections—a proposition that would easily double (if not triple) voter participation. The politically outspoken were conflicted. Some, including Creative Loafing Tampa Bay, recommended against it. Many were concerned it would make municipal elections less visible.

But the good people of St. Petersburg were not conflicted. Not even close. Given the choice, voters easily chose to re-calendar their municipal elections by nearly 70%. In hindsight, this supermajority vote was not terribly surprising. Nationally, clear majorities of Democrats (73%) and Republicans (61%) favor on-cycle local elections.

Such bipartisan agreement is rare these days. Which begs the question: why do so many cities, including the City of Tampa, continue to keep local elections separate from state and national contests?

The answer: history. More specifically, the municipal reform movement of the 1900s. Members of this movement tried zealously to keep local politics as remote from state and national politics as possible.

On its face, this goal seems reasonable. If midterm elections and municipal elections are on the same day, communities risk permitting an inflammatory statewide candidate (i.e. Ron DeSantis) from influencing the makeup of a city’s dais.

But upon further examination—not quite. This assumes a deeply undemocratic premise: that some voters cannot be trusted.

The municipal reformers of the 1900s masterfully weaponized such distrust. And to advance their goal, they promoted a dangerous and familiar trope: the “Good Voter” versus the “Bad Voter.”

The “Good Voter” was a smart, sophisticated, business-minded voter with the city’s business interests at heart. The “Bad Voter” was an uneducated, unsophisticated, sock puppet controlled by partisan or malevolent forces. Naturally, the “Good Voters” of the municipal reform movement were middle and upper-class white people. The “Bad Voters” were the commonly demonized: immigrants, people of color, and members of the lower class.

To the municipal reformers, Bad Voters could not be trusted to scramble the nuances of city businesses. They were either bought-and-paid-for or too uneducated, underpaid, or immature to understand complicated things like roads or clean water.

Accordingly, guided either by the municipal reform movement or other troubling elitist ideals, so-called Good Voters did everything they could to keep Bad Voters from spoiling local elections. And felt righteous doing so. This included introducing things as uncomplicated as poll taxes and literacy tests, to things as complicated as creating whites-only municipal parties to attempt side-stepping the 14th Amendment to prevent minorities from influencing elections.

(Please know that a White Municipal Party actually existed in the City of Tampa. Former Tampa Mayor Pam Iorio wrote an excellent article about it.).

In a healthy democracy, we understand there is no such thing as a Bad Voter. Accordingly, many of the techniques to keep so-called Bad Voters

voters are a more representative 63%. In these higher-turnout elections, participation by African American voters materially increases. The Hispanic share of voters nearly doubles. And Asian American share nearly triples.

Not accidentally, studies show that aligning local elections with more diverse turnout leads to the election of city officials who are more representative of the public and policies that are more in line with the preferences of all classes and races. Books published by scholars Sara Anzia, Brian Schaffner et al., and Zoltan Hajnal make this case with authority. (Note: The Atlantic heavily quotes some of Professor Sara Anzia’s work in a recent article about election timing.)

Off-cycle municipal elections also poorly reflect the age of Tampa’s voters. Quite shock-

OP-ED

Presidential races would turn out only a marginally more Democratic voter (59.1%).

Nor is this a partisan issue. Democratic and Republican leaders are both pushing this same reform. For example California’s overwhelmingly Democratic state government passed a law mandating on-cycle local elections when local turnout falls below a certain threshold in 2015. Arizona’s overwhelmingly Republican state government then passed an almost identical law (though its supreme court later found the mandate violated the state constitution’s “home rule” language).

out of municipal elections have been abolished. But in many cities, these off-cycle municipal elections continue as relics from a shameful time.

Today in Tampa, the city’s commitment to this outdated practice resulted in an abysmal municipal election turnout this year: 13.65%. In these low turnout affairs, the data is irrefutable: residents over 65, white voters, and the wealthy are overrepresented.

Tampa’s municipal elections are hardly diverse. The voting share of white citizens dominate these contests with nearly 75% of the vote. In Tampa’s Presidential elections—which draw an average of six times the turnout—white

ingly so. These contests are utterly dominated by voters over the age of 65—by an average of 52.6% of the vote. Voters under 40 make up an inexcusable 6.3% of turnout.

That aberration is easily fixed. A new election date could stabilize that dynamic to a more reflective 30.37% of under-40 voters and 22.99% of voters over retirement age.

And no, changing the election date will not create a partisan windfall one way or the other. The share of voters who identify as Democrats in the City of Tampa are essentially identical from off-cycle elections (57.95%) to midterm elections (56.66%). Scheduling elections to coincide with

All voters are good voters. It is time that Tampa finally trusted the judgment of its citizens by making it easier and more convenient to vote—not harder. The City of St. Petersburg has chosen to do so. As have the cities of Los Angeles, San Francisco, San Jose, and Boulder. Ultimately, these cities will save millions of dollars of taxpayer money and relieve other unnecessary burdens on public infrastructure. But most importantly, they will reap the benefits of a healthy democracy. A local government that trusts its voters results in something truly vital for community: voters that trust the local government.

Matt Newton is a Tampa attorney board certified in City, County & Local Government Law, a La Gaceta columnist, and serves as chair of Community Tampa Bay.

DAVE DECKER

NOW YOU SEE ME: Opponents of on-cycle local elections think municipal contests would be less visible.

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RESTAURANTS RECIPES DINING GUIDES

Get baked

Fort Lauderdale pizza chain announces expansion in Tampa.

By Kyla Fields and Colin Wolf

Apizza chain that asks customers to “Get Baked” and to “Legalize Marinara” is coming to Tampa. Last week, Fort Lauderdale-based pizza company Stoner’s Pizza Joint announced plans to open three new locations in the Tampa area over the next two years. According to a press release, the first location will debut on North Dale Mabry Highway this October, and is owned by the company’s COO Scott Mobley. Stoner’s Pizza Joint says it hopes to open 100 new units by the end of 2025 throughout the United States.

“We’ve had our eye on the booming Tampa market for several years and are thrilled to have found our first location,” said Mobley in a statement. “We are aggressively looking to open additional locations throughout the Tampa metro market over the next 2 years, we want to make sure ALL of Tampa Gets Baked!”

The company, which claims to target college towns for new locations, currently operates 34 stores across the Southeast and Colorado. Besides its herbthemed branding, the delivery/ takeout-focused concept features specialty baked pizzas, calzones, strombolis, smoked wings, boneless “Nugz,” sandwiches, baked desserts, and “Quality Greens” (aka salads).

Popular dessert shop The Salty Donut opens Friday in Hyde Park Village

A new spot to satisfy your sweet tooth opens its doors in South Tampa this weekend. After many months of anticipation, dessert and coffee shop The Salty Donut celebrates its grand opening on Friday, Sept. 15 at 1519 W Swann Ave., adjacent to other popular Hyde Park Village concepts like On Swann, Goody Goody and Bartaco.

The first 50 customers on Friday and Saturday will receive a tote bag filled with Salty swag. The

Salty Donut will also host a pre-opening lottery for customers that would like to skip the grand opening day crowds—interested folks can register for its sneak peek by filling out this form. The Miamibased doughnut shop will give 50 lucky people a box of free treats alongside their pre-opening tour. While Tampa’s upcoming location has a menu similar to other shops throughout Florida

chip and sea salt doughnuts and a dinosaurthemed “dirt pie” dessert for the kiddos.

And if you prefer to drink your sugar instead of eating it, you can always indulge in a cinnamon cereal milk latte or apple pie chai tea instead.

The dessert shop’s second Tampa location will soon open out of a refurbished Seminole Heights bungalow and is slated to debut later this year.

Co-owners Amanda Pizarro and Andy Rodriguez launched their Miami-based doughnut brand out of a vintage camper in 2014. Over the last nine years, The Salty Donut has expanded outside of the The Sunshine State into Georgia, Texas and North Carolina.

Tampa’s MOSI hosts a ‘Science of the Cuban Sandwich’ event this weekend

Whether you’re a sandwich lover, history buff or science nerd, Tampa’s Museum of Science and Art hosts an event that aims to please folks in all three categories. Mosi, located at 4801 E Fowler Ave. (and stylized “MOSI”), celebrates Tampa’s signature dish at its “Science of the Cuban Sandwich” foodie event this weekend.

This nighttime party at the museum features live entertainment, a culinary competition to find out which participating restaurant dishes out the best sammy, raffles, beverage pairings, and a science demonstration that aims to “uncover the secrets behind the perfect Cuban sandwich.” Different scientific principles up for discussion include: the physics of baking bread, the chemistry of sandwich fillings and the biology of taste and flavor.

While participants for the Cuban sandwich competition have yet to be released, Mosi announced the judges who will determine its winner. The lineup includes Temple Terrace Mayor Andy Ross, Tampa Bay Times writer Maggie Duffy and radio host Pat Donovan, among others. In other Mosi-related news, the museum will soon debut an on-site food truck and outdoor lounge, courtesy of Ybor City’s Zydeco Brew Werks. General Manager Josh Henneman tells Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that Zydeco’s second location will debut sometime this fall, making MOSI a go-to destination for both kids and their parents.

and Georgia, The Salty Donut will specifically cater to Tampeños by offering unique flavors like guava and cheese and strawberry tres leche.

Seasonal bakes currently on The Salty Donut’s menu include a mango and passion fruit brioche topped with fruity buttercream and white chocolate crumble, gluten-free chocolate

After next weekend’s grand opening, Hyde Park Village’s The Salty Donut will be open from 7 a.m.-7 p.m. Sunday-Thursday and 7 a.m.-10 p.m. on Fridays and Saturdays, which makes it a postdinner dessert hotspot in South Tampa. For the latest information on Tampa’s newest doughnut shop, head to its Instagram at @thesaltydonut.

Mosi’s “Science of the Cuban Sandwich” event takes place on Saturday, Sept. 16 from 6 p.m.-9 p.m. Tickets cost $20 for MOSI members and $25 for non-members; all attendees must be ages 18 & up. For the latest information on Mosi’s Science of the Cuban Sandwich event, head to its Facebook page @mositampa or Instagram at @mosi_tampa.

TACO THE TOWN: Stoner’s has, naturally, incorporated green into some of its pie.

MOVIES THEATER ART CULTURE

King of the world

Meet the Tampa Bay man on a mission to collect a million copies of ‘Titanic’ on VHS.

By Chelsea Zukowski

Apeach-colored house on a quiet street in northwest Largo is home to likely the world’s largest collection of “Titanic” on VHS. As of last month, the 31-year-old who goes by his initials JD and declined to share his name, has amassed 2,121 copies of James Cameron’s 1997 blockbuster historical disaster romance. “I grew up in a Titanic family. So, it’s always been…the most iconic VHS I’ve ever seen in my whole life,” he said.

A big chunk of his collection comes from donations around the country thanks to the success of his TikTok page. “Titanicfan97” has 118,000 followers and earns tens of thousands of views on almost every video posted. The TikTok videos began when JD thought, “why not? I see people doing stuff like that all the time.”

logo sticker—are lovingly organized on their own bookshelf.

But JD is far from stopping. He wants at least 1 million copies of the film so he can rebuild the Titanic using copies of Titanic on VHS. “Kind of like the next Noah’s Ark, but instead of animals it’s all Jack Dawsons,” he said.

INTERVIEW

90’s Con

JD collects other Titanic memorabilia, too. There are over 100 copies of the movie’s soundtrack, reference books, an authentic prop from the film, international editions and fan-made arts and crafts. He also has collectible replicas of the iconic ship of dreams, a replica of an early 20th century life jacket and a water cooler he labeled “Iceberg Juice.”

Friday-Sunday, Sept. 15-17. $40 & up Tampa Convention Center, 333 S Franklin St., Tampa. thats4entertainment.com

His cheesy, nostalgic videos took off, especially when he inflected his voice to a nasally, autotune-ish pitch. And then followers began asking if they could donate their copies of Titanic on VHS. “So, we opened a P.O. box and then people started dumping just tons of Titanic on us. I would say like 80%, maybe more, of this collection is donated,” JD said.

His posts have a wide range—from thrift store trips around the Tampa Bay area to opening donated boxes of Titanic on VHS. There are also plenty of unhinged videos of JD’s Jack Dawson doll (complete with DiCaprio’s face taped on) meeting fans on trips around the country.

JD’s collection of Titanic on VHS—“T on V,” as he calls it—lines the walls and shelves of one room and spills out into a dining area. His streaming and gaming setup is there, too, along with Titanic-themed curtains separating the mini museum from the kitchen and living room. He organizes the more than 2,000 copies by format and seal. The gold widescreen editions snake around the room’s ceiling, held up by the baby blue standard double VHS tapes. The sealed ones—with the signature Paramount

“It’s a lot of Titanic,” he said.

Despite the size and uniqueness of his collection, JD said Guinness World Records won’t recognize it with a record. “They said no duplicates; my whole collection is pretty much duplicates. But I’m thinking if I build the Titanic out of ‘Titanic,’ that’s got to be a world record,” he said.

His love of “Titanic” began in December 1997 when he saw the movie for the first time. A year later, more than 25 million copies of Titanic on VHS had been sold. The movie went on to win 11 Academy Awards and four Grammys. To say Titanic was and still is a cultural touchstone is an understatement. To JD, Titanic is the greatest film ever made.

“James Cameron, Jack Dawson (Leonardo DiCaprio), Celine Dion, Bill Paxton—I mean, it has everything you need in the movie,” he said. “It’s the most iconic movie of my life. I saw it when I was a kid in theaters, and I’m still watching it to this day.”

The collecting started about a decade ago when JD and his partner in collecting, who goes by Miss T, picked up 12 copies of “Titanic” on VHS at a hospice thrift store in Clearwater. “So I just started collecting them and we just

didn’t stop for years. We kept collecting every time we saw ‘Titanic,’” he explained.

Years later, they had about 100 copies. And so “titanicfan97” was born. On a recent trip to New York, Jack Dawson finally visited Times Square, the Nintendo Store and saw the “Titanique” musical. JD and little JD also attend local fan conventions like MetroCon and the upcoming 90’s Con at the Tampa Convention Center.

But at the heart of JD’s impressive collection of VHS tapes is his love of the film. In his Titanic room, he has four different televisions playing the movie at the same time. He watches the nearly three-and-a-half hour movie at least once a day, and always on VHS. “It’s just better on VHS. “It’s just like opening a fine bottle of wine or…putting on vinyl,” he added.

Because of the nature of film, the tapes eventually begin to degrade from use, so he occasionally has to switch out the VHS tapes he plays. But that doesn’t make them any less valuable to JD, who loves that the initial run of Titanic on VHS came with a filmstrip and lithographs from the movie. Some of the boxed

sets also came with a coupon for a free copy of Titanic on VHS if you switched to Sprint. “That’s double the awesome. I think that’s always really cool to have in the special editions,” he said.

JD’s collection of dreams grows every day thanks to donations and the fact that nearly 60 million copies of Titanic on VHS were sold worldwide. In North America, 25 million copies were sold just in the first three months of the film’s Sept. 1, 1998, release.

“And eventually James Cameron’s going to call me with a pallet of these things and we’re going to have hundreds of thousands of these things,” JD said. In the meantime, JD’s community of fellow Titanic lovers continues to throw support and VHS tapes behind him. They may come to gawk at the wallpaper of Titanic on VHS, but they stay for JD’s quirky, passionate personality and love of all things RMS Titanic.

“We have a lot of support; the community loves it,” JD said. “We haven’t met James Cameron, we haven’t met Jack Dawson. I mean, there’s Celine Dion, too. There’s still so much to do.”

I’M INVOLVED NOW: JD has more than 2,000 copies of ‘Titanic’ on VHS.

CHELSEA ZUKOWSKI

“Eventually James Cameron’s going to call me with a pallet of these things.”

REMEMBERING VILNA

film with orchestra

Fri, Sept 22, 7:30 pm

Sat, Sept 23, 2 pm - Matinee

At the Mahaffey Theater

Hough Family Foundation Masterworks

Holst’s The Planets

Michael Francis conducts a supersonic trip with NASA images. Also: The Percussion Collective.

Sat, Sept 30, 8 pm, Mahaffey Theater

Sun, Oct 1, 7:30 pm, Ruth Eckerd Hall

Raymond James Pops

Cirque Dances with Troupe Vertigo

The circus meets the symphony

Sat, Oct 7, 8 pm, Mahaffey Theater

Sun, Oct 8, 2 pm, Mahaffey Theater - Matinee

Featuring visually stunning imagery and groundbreaking special effects, pits man against prehistoric predators in the ultimate battle for survival. Experience it in HD with The Florida Orchestra performing John Williams’ iconic score live to picture.

By Josh Bradley & Ray Roa C CL Recommends

THU 14

Tampa Jazz Club: USF Faculty Jazz Ensemble Ybor City is usually the place for a Tampa Jazz Club gig, but this weekend, the coalition tries something, well, New, and is New Tampa. The neighborhood’s Performing Arts Center hosts the jazz ensemble from nearby University of South Florida, and attendees can expect to see saxophonist Jack Wilkins (Director of the Jazz Studies program at USF) play tunes from Horace Silver, Cannonball Adderly and Miles Davis alongside a heavyweight ensemble featuring trombone player Tom Brantley, trumpeter James Suggs, pianist Pablo Arencibia, guitarist LaRue Nickelson and more. (New Tampa Performing Arts Center, Tampa)

FRI 15

Igorrr w/Melt-Banana/Otto Von Schirach At two separate Ybor City addresses, Orpheum cemented itself as a boozy, essential Tampa Bay live music venue. One band that frequented both spots was Japanese punk outfit Melt-Banana. The act’s manic stage legendary is legendary, and it’ll be good to once again see the noise-rock favorite on an Orpheum stage that’s now living in North Tampa. (Orpheum, Tampa)

Joey Fatone & Friends With the age-old rumor of an *NSYNC reunion at the Super Bowl flaring back up (and actually looking better than ever), this weekend might be a good time to catch Orlando man Joey Fatone lead a “Welcome To Tampa” ‘90s party at the end of the first day of ‘90s Con. The Fat One—who will be meeting with fans at the Con all weekend—will be joined by Backstreet Boy AJ McLean as well as a handful of unannounced guests. Don’t be too shocked if Nick Carter—the Backstreet Boy who called Tampa home for a time—is on that currently confidential list. (Tampa Theatre, Tampa)

Lil Baby w/GloRilla/Glossup/Rylo Rodriguez/Hunxho It’s been a rough week for 28-year-old Atlanta hip-hop darling Dominique Armani Jones. In Nashville, an audience member managed to bring a gun into FedExForum, shooting and injuring one person in the audience in what is believed to be a targeted attack, per the Associated Press. Though Lil Baby was rushed offstage at that moment, the rest of his current “It’s Only Us” tour—promoting his latest album of the same name—is still on and rolls into town just over a year after he made some of us cringe while agreeing to open for Chris Brown at the ol’ Gary. (Amalie Arena, Tampa)

Matt and Kim w/Babe Haven Matt Johnson and Kim Schifino’s new PG14 project—described as a more synth-punk variant of the New York City-based duo’s 17-year-old career—will remain untouched when the duo returns to St. Petersburg for the first time since 2019. Crowd surfing is not just allowed at their gigs, but it’s encouraged, so maybe keep your “Lego Movie 2”-loving kids at home Friday night. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg)

Tony Harnell w/Ted Poley/Anthony Corder/Ben Hans While Tony Harnell is cooking up some new material with Norwegian glam-metal outfit TNT (due sometime next year), he’s taking a new approach on the road this fall. The 60-year-old singer is fronting a limited string of “acoustic storyteller” gigs, alongside fellow glam metal frontmen Ted Poley (Danger Danger) and Anthony Corder (Tora Tora). More dates have been promised but have yet to be announced, so consider this another W for Tampa Bay, in terms of seeing a tour early on. (Brass Mug, Tampa)

SAT 16

Chris Farren w/Diners/Mak For indierock lovers over 35 years old, the name Chris Farren conjures warm memories of Sunshine State rock band Fake Problems. In his solo endeavors, the 37-year-old Naples man remains one of the nicest dudes in rock and roll, and he’s on the road supporting Doom Singer, a new album produced by Melina Duterte. The Jay Som principal

coached Farren into some of his finest work yet. Singles like “Cosmic Leash,” “Bluish” and “First Place” find his vocal sounding bigger than ever on songs that are Farren's most joyous to date—and you might credit some of that to Duterte, drummer Frankie Impastato and Jeff Rosenstock who helped him bring the record to life. “Looking back on those records… I have no good memories of making them,” Farren said in a press release about his previous solo output. “It’s always been a lonely, doubt-ridden process.” Welcome back, buddy. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa)

Keep Flying w/Dagger/Caught Fire/Last

Bias Keep Flying’s latest outing, Daylight , was released last month, but it sounds like it could’ve fit perfectly into a early-2000s Drive-Thru Records compilation CD. For this no-cover gig, the emo/pop-punk sextet gets support from Lakeland alt-rock band Dagger, plus St. Pete punk outfit Caught Fire and oldschool post-hardcore quartet Last Bias. (The Bends, St. Petersburg)

Kenny Loggins w/Pablo Cruise The 75-year-old cites wanting to spend more time at home as his reason for kicking off his, err, touring shoes, so if you have a hankering for hearing your favorite ‘80s movie theme songs live, rev up your engine and head to downtown Clearwater. (The Sound, Clearwater)

OhGeesy Shoreline Mafia has been history for a few years now, but founding member Alejandro Carranza—aka OhGeesy—is

continued on page 40

Lil Baby

continued from page 39

already making a name for himself as a solo artist. The 29-year-old L.A. emcee dropped his sophomore solo album Geezyworld 2 earlier this year, a feature-filled 23-track collection of trap lore centered around living in L.A. Wiz Khalifa—who has collaborated with Shoreline Mafia before—also popped his head into Carranza’s latest single, “From The Jump," and if that isn’t a sign that you’re going to be highly regarded in the modern hip-hop community, I don’t know what is. (Crowbar, Ybor City)

SUN 17

Avenged Sevenfold w/Falling In Reverse

More than two decades after the release of its debut album, Avenged Sevenfold remains one of the most popular hard-rock bands in America, and recently saw its single “Nobody” chart high in several Billboard rankings. Interesting for this show was the fact that some ticket holders might’ve purchased their tickets using tokens affiliated with A7’s Deathbat NFTs. (Midflorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa)

Forest Sounds: Ona-K Ona Kirei received a grant from St. Petersburg’s Palladium Theater and immediately knew that whatever music she created using the money would need to be heard by as many people as possible. For Full New Luna, Kirei, who now flies under the Ona-K moniker, tapped 19 of Tampa Bay’s best musicians, to help the music come to life. A crowdfunding campaign has been started to help her climb out of debt (it’s expensive to pay people what they deserve), and the Full New Luna prerelease tour rolls on this weekend when she brings some of them to Tampa’s best new little music venue for an intimate show. (The Far Forest, Tampa)

Wave To Earth w/Slchld The Korean indiepop trio—which names itself after a desire to “become the new wave”—wraps up a run of late summer gigs promoting a bubbly debut 0.1 flaws and all album. The band’s first gig ever in Tampa is the only show on the current tour itinerary that isn’t sold out to the gills. (Orpheum, Tampa)

Sunday Live Music Series: Suwannee Avenue Marching Band Oktoberfest season is here (read more on p. 13), and Seminole Heights’ Indie bar gets in on the action by tapping a keg of Weihenstephaner Festbier, but not before a ceremonial marching band leads a contingent from Hillsborough High School (meet at W Wilder and Central Avenues) to the beer hall 0.7 miles away. Lederhosen encouraged, obviously, and the band has plans to play all night. (Independent Bar & Cafe, Tampa)

TUE 19

Colony House w/Lunar Vacation Caleb and Will Chapman may have followed in their famous dad Stephen Curtis Chapman’s footsteps, but they don’t sing about Jesus the way he does. The boys’ indie-rock outfit Colony House is currently promoting its latest album The Cannonballers , which has a few songs that sound like your favorite ‘90s alt-rock band, had the guitarist listened to

a shitton more Dick Dale. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg)

Dire Straits Legacy: Phil Palmer w/ Alan Clark/Danny Cummings/Mel Collins/Marco Caviglia/Primiano

Dibiase/Cristiano Micalizzi Before being approached by Mark Knopfler to play saxophone on Dire Straits’ “Two Young Lovers,” Mel Collins was already a successful session musician, having previously played sax for The Rolling Stones’ “Miss You,” some Eric Clapton tracks, and most notably, a handful of early King Crimson incarnations. His original run in the court of the crimson king was tumultuous enough that he avoided any and all information about the band for decades.

“[Frontman Robert Fripp] was really mean to me. He wanted to dominate me,” Collins told Creative Loafing Tampa during a midrehearsals phone call from Slovenia. “It got to the point where I thought ‘I can’t do this.’ I was 22, I had to find other music to play.” He did return to the fold in 2013, but with that incarnation—and seemingly King Crimson as a whole—also put to rest, the 76-year-old saxman has shifted his attention towards what is described as the closest to a Dire Straits live experience fans are ever going to get. Read our full interview with Collins at cltampa.com/ music. (Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater)

The Nude Party w/Lady Apple Tree/ FayRoy The North Carolina-based sextet’s third album Rides On is 48 minutes of lo-fi, 1960s influence that make purists question what the hell happened to music. Patton Magee and company appear to lean heavily on guitar lick influence from The Byrds, and even vocals that carry the same mmph and almost twangy aspects heard in Mick Jagger’s pipes. Considering how many venues in town that have been graced by The Nude Party—including The Bends, where it staged a gig seven years ago—it’s getting to the point where catching the band live is slowly but surely evolving into a rite of passage for Tampeños. (Crowbar, Ybor City)

Two Piece w/Cold Steel/Gaijin/Migrant Fury Contrary to popular belief, hip-hop does not have a monopoly on funky shit out of the dirty south. Two Piece, proudly reps the Sunshine State, and arrives at Tampa’s favorite biker bar venue armed with a 2022 self-titled featuring neck-breaking, beatdown-ready hardcore. Tampa thrash-crossover band Cold Steel supports alongside Port Charlotte slam band Gaijin and Latin hardcore band Migrant Fury. (Born Free Pub & Grill, Tampa)

THU 21

Community Couch w/Floating Boy/ Articles/The Wayfarin’ Leo Rodger It’s been a long time since Community Couch appeared on a local bill, and it’s good to see Stove Johnson back in the saddle, with uke in hand and ready to play feel-good punk-rock inspired by everything from Randy Travis and Tim McGraw to The Wonder Years. Johnson, who’s just visiting after moving away, plays solo for this free show and is backed by Sarasota emo band Floating Boy, Gainesville punk outfit Articles and emergent Bay area folk hero, The Wayfarin’ Leo Rodger. (The Bends, St. Petersburg)

Fidlar w/Bed Bug Guru Less than a month after dropping a screamo version of Tom Petty’s “Free Fallin’”—which starts off in a more soothing manner before the last chorus kicks in—the L.A. based punk-rock trio dropped an album that acoustically reimagines seven harder songs from across its 12-year career. After appearing to have ignored Floridians on tour for eight years, the band is set to off a six-date “Floriduh” tour on Thursday, with further stops taking place in Orlando, Jacksonville, Gainesville, and beyond. (Orpheum, Tampa)

The Nude Party

CLARK HODGIN

SEPTEMBER

In the absence of Summer Jam, Vibes of the Bay has emerged as the preeminent local music festival for discovering your new favorite band. At the end of this month, the party returns after a three-year hiatus, and its organizer Symphonic Distribution just finalized the 2023 lineup.

The poster includes several emcees whose names and faces have regularly found their way into Creative Loafing Tampa Bay’s coverage (what’s up Sam E Hues, Perception, Vern Sr., Nico Sweet and Pusha Preme), but also includes a true representation of the best the local scene has to offer. Also included in the 2023 Vibes of the Bay lineup is Rolling Loud alum Barely Legal Collective, emerging producer-songwriterrapper Johnny Champagne, heart-hitting emo favorite Pet Lizard, rock and roll star Shevonne, plus bright young songwriters Sundé and Biishop the Artist, along with spoken work favorite Dennis Amadeus. T. Couture (pictured), a producer and DJ is also on the bill.

In an email, Symphonic’s Vice President of Corporate Marketing, Janette Berrios said that having to put Vibes on hiatus was difficult, but that she is looking forward to the revival of what “always feels like a big musical family coming together under one roof.” The pandemic, she pointed out, might have even spurred the strong 2023 lineup.

“Tampa Bay’s music scene has evolved and grown tremendously since our last festival. I feel like the pandemic gave artists the time to create more, focus on themselves, and what they really want. Many established acts like Pusha Preme and Perception came back with a force, and I love to see a new generation of artists emerging, like Barely Legal Collective, Sundé and T. Couture,” Berrios added. “We wanted to make sure

our return was memorable and painted a picture of the incredible talent that has flourished during our hiatus.”

In all 17, acts will play two stages alongside live painting from Selena Ferrer and a vendor market curated by Indie Flea. If you register in advance, there’s no cover for Symphonic Distribution’s Vibes of the Bay happening Saturday, Sept. 30 at Crowbar in Ybor City (admission will be $10 at the door). See the full lineup via cltampa.com/ music and check out Josh Bradley’s weekly roundup of new concert announcements below.—Ray

Roa

Borgeous Saturday, Dec. 16. 10 p.m. $25. The Ritz, Ybor City

Marcia Ball and Tinsley Ellis Friday, Jan. 12. 8 p.m. $19.50 & up. Central Park Performing Arts Center, Largo

Tesla Tuesday, Jan. 16. 8 p.m. $80 & up. Hard Rock Event Center at Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino, Tampa

Judy Collins Thursday, Jan. 18. 8 p.m. $35 & up. Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater

Il Divo Tuesday, Dec. 19. 8 p.m. $68.50 & up. Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg

Styx w/.38 Special Friday, Jan. 5. 7 p.m. $39.50 & up. The Sound, Clearwater

Paul Thorn Band Thursday, Jan. 11. 8 p.m. $30 & up. Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater

Story Of The Year Sunday, Jan. 21. 7:30 p.m. $34.50 & up. The Ritz, Ybor City

Drivin’ & Cryin’ Saturday, Jan. 27. 8 p.m. $29.50 & up. Central Park Performing Arts Center, Largo

Crypta Sunday, Feb. 4. 7 p.m. $20. Orpheum, Tampa

Dar Williams Sunday, Feb. 4. 7:30 p.m. $35 & up. Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater

Judy Kuhn Saturday, Feb. 17. 8 p.m. $29.50 & up. Central Park Performing Arts Center, Largo

JP Saxe Friday, Feb. 23. 7 p.m. Prices TBA. Orpheum, Tampa

The Artimus Pyle Band Friday, March 29. 8 p.m. $34.50 & up. Central Park Performing Arts Center, Largo

Quickies

By Dan Savage

I’m a fisting top and I always ask my bottoms to make sure they’re cleaned out. What is the proper etiquette when brown liquid explodes out of a bottom, covering me, the bed, the walls, and the floor? Get out of bed, shower off, get dressed, put the bottom in an Uber, exit the apartment, lock the door behind you, go to the airport, fly to a new city, don’t leave a forwarding address.

My BF of 10 years is 53. I’m 43. Things have cooled off in the bedroom as he has age-related issues like indigestion, back pain, and headaches—all the usual age stuff. How do we spice it back up? How do I get him back into his kinky gear for some kinky fun? He was kinkier when he was younger, so I know it’s in him. Any tips?

you or with the gangbang porn (provided, of course, that it’s ethically produced gangbang porn, which does exist). Like all men, you’re less “into the idea” of whatever turns you on right after you come. Losing interest as you crash into your refractory period doesn’t mean your kinks are shameful—it means you have a little time to think about something else.

agreed to tell each other if that changed. Does that mean anything about the relationship? Is this at all significant? Is it just about safety? This clearly means something to you—but only time will tell whether it means something to the other person involved.

How do you know if you’re making the right decision when it comes to breaking up with a significant other? You don’t.

SAVAGE LOVE

Instead of trying to get him back into the exact same kinky stuff he enjoyed doing 10 years ago—and felt physically capable of doing 10 years ago—work on identifying some new kinky stuff that vibes with the themes of the kinks he used to enjoy and that aren’t as physically taxing. For instance, you could substitute simpler easy-in/easy-out bondage for long, elaborate bondage sessions or you could ask him to watch while you do whatever he orders you to with your favorite insertion toys. (I’m guessing at your kinks here—but you get the idea.)

My university-aged cisgendered heterosexual daughter now identifies as asexual. Which is all good. But what does that mean? Not getting any? Doesn’t want any? I don’t want to bother her about it if she isn’t into chatting about it but I would like to know what’s going on. Some asexuals aren’t getting any and don’t want any. Some asexuals get some but don’t want much. Some asexuals get lots and want more. Asexuality, like so much else, is a vast and broad spectrum. You can learn about all the different points (and all the different pride flags) along that vast and broad spectrum at the Asexuality Visibility and Education Network’s website asexuality.org. But only your daughter knows where she falls—at least for now—along that spectrum.

I’m a 40-something straight male who only gets off to gangbang porn. It has to be focused on female pleasure; I don’t enjoy anything violent or rough. I’ve never even had a threesome, and honestly when it’s over—right after I come—I’m not into the idea anymore. What’s going on? Don’t mistake post-nut indifference for post-nut clarity—meaning, your sudden disinterest in gangbang porn right after you come watching gangbang porn isn’t a sign that there’s something wrong with

Why has caging become so popular in gay porn? Interestingly, cock cages—male chastity devices—were being used by straight men in cuckold relationships long before gay men embraced them, making cock cages one of the rare kinks that jumped from straight kinksters to gay ones. That usually works the other way around, i.e., gay men beta test some new perversion and straight people pretend to be revolted for a decent interval before co-opting the kink. Anyway, I think cages are popular in gay porn because popular gay porn stars like Caged Jock and Devin Franco popularized them.

Is it safe to sleep with a cock chastity cage on? Dr. Stephen King, a urologist, urged my readers not to wear a male chastity devices overnight: “My primary concern is long-term health and preservation of erectile function ‘down the road,’ so I tend to err on the cautious side… so, I’d caution against any long-term or continuous use of such a device, anything more than four to six hours, if it places any significant compression on the tissue directly,” King told me back in 2013. For more on cock cage safety, check out this 2015 column featuring an interview with Christopher Miers, the founder of steelwerksextreme.com, purveyors of the world’s finest male chastity devices.

Isn’t sex only sex when there’s an erection and penetration involved? If sex is only sex when an erection and penetration is involved, then mutual masturbation isn’t sex. fingering isn’t sex, scissoring isn’t sex, cunnilingus isn’t sex, pegging isn’t sex, eating ass isn’t sex, two bottoms jamming on a double-ended dildo while their cocks are caged isn’t sex. And if you walked in on your wife scissoring with one woman while another woman ate her ass and yet another woman pegged the woman eating your wife’s ass… and two gay bottom boys in cock cages jammed on a double-ended dildo on the other side of the room… you wouldn’t think, “No erections, no penetration, nothing to see here!”

My ex was very small, but my new guy is hung like a horse. He’s almost too big! Can one adjust? One can, one must, one will—but will you be that one?

I’m with just one person and they’re currently only sleeping with me. We’ve both

Can you test positive for weed after eating pussy while the receiver is high? People have tested positive for weed and other substances after drinking the urine of someone who was high—but vaginal secretions aren’t urine, i.e., a woman’s body doesn’t eliminate waste through vaginal secretions. So, I think it’s unlikely a sober person would test positive after eating the pussy of a woman who was high—but that’s a semi-informed guess, not a guarantee.

No-longer-used sex toys. What to do with them? Landfill? I had a friend who used to wash her old sex toys, place them in a Easter basket with a bow on it, and then leave the basket a busy corner in the nightlife district with a note that said, “Gently used, lovingly cleaned and sterilized, and looking for a good home.” Most probably wound up in landfills, but one or two may have been saved.

Why are you such a fag? Ours is not to reason why, ours is butt to screw and sigh.

Is it safe to have anal sex right after a colonoscopy? I mean, my ass will never be cleaner. So long as you didn’t have any polyps snipped out, you’re good to go.

Many vers gay men speak disparagingly about guys who only enjoy one role—meaning, gay guys who only top or only bottom. Thoughts? With most gay men identifying as either tops or bottoms these days—and with some gay men making which role they enjoy during anal sex their entire personality (at least on social media)—it’s understandable that some vers guys might be annoyed by a tribalism that excludes them. It would be great if annoyed vers guys could assert themselves without disparaging guys who enjoy one role or the other, of course, but the longer you’re told you have to pick a team, the more annoyed you get; the more annoyed you get, the likelier you are to speak disparagingly of the people pressuring you to pick a team. (Just ask a bisexual.)

How can I, a 41-year-old woman, tell my wonderful new Dom, a 39-year-old man, that I need to be warmed up before impact play and that I prefer more consistent rhythmic strokes to get into sub space? Any resources? The resource you need can be found under your nose and above your chin: open your mouth, use your words. If you can’t bring yourself to talk about your limits, boundaries, needs, and how certain kinds of play work best for you, you’re not ready for a D/s relationship. If this man has convinced you “real” subs aren’t allowed to have limits

or boundaries or preferences—and a slow build during impact play is a perfectly legitimate preference—then at best he’s a bad Dom, at worst he’s an abusive Dom.

My boyfriend and I recently opened our relationship. He prefers random encounters while I prefer deeper connections. How do we make that work and avoid open relationship pitfalls? He could have random encounters while you pursue deeper connections. But if he wants things kept strictly casual with outside partners and casual/anon sex doesn’t work for you, you might have to close the relationship back down until you can get on the same page.

My nesting partner is demi and reciprosexual and had some SA trauma in his past, whereas I am mega and have a very high drive. I’d like to initiate more since he’ll likely reciprocate my advances, and only having sex with him once a week is pretty rough for me. However, I have severe RSD (rejection sensitive dysphoria) and am terrified of triggering him and being rejected. We’ve talked it out and he gave me his ongoing consent to make moves on him, but I’m still scared. Any suggestions?

Take “yes” for an answer—you have your nesting partner’s OK/yes to ask for sex—and then constantly remind yourself that he’s not rejecting you when passes on sex, he’s passing sex at this time. In a sense, you never get a “no” from your partner. Sometimes his answer is “yes,” and sometimes his answer is “ask me again later,” but he never says “no” to you. It’s not rejection, it’s delayed gratification.

I ghosted someone after a few dates and feel shitty about it. I know better and want to reach out to apologize. It’s been about three months. Do you recommend I apologize, or just bury the guilt and never do it again? Apologize—but don’t let the guilt go. Well, not all of it. Hold on to just enough guilt that you’re motivated to send a gracious thanks-but-no-thanks text the next time you’re tempted to ghost on someone, if only to avoid feeling as guilty as you do now.

I’m 50, poly, and live in the Midwest. My married boyfriend of 11 years has a second girlfriend who has cancer, but who also hates me—honestly, without good reason. She’s going on a cruise over Christmas and New Years with everyone in my polycule, excluding me. Any advice for managing my hurt feelings and jealousy would be appreciated. Think about all the COVID variants you won’t be catching on that cruise ship—and all the COVID variants this woman who hates you is going to be exposed to on this cruise. Oh, and if your entire polycule is abandoning you over the holidays, you might also wanna think about finding or forming a new polycule. Send your question to mailbox@savage.love. Podcasts, columns and more at Savage.Love.

FAMILIAR SOUNDING PLACES by

ACROSS

1 Michael married her 10 Heavenly sight 15 Deer John?

20

3

5 Pooh’s creator

6 “Put ___ on it!”

7 Tape: abbr.

11 Voting word

12 Serengeti beast

13 Bury

14 Woody vines

15 Mr. Wizard’s subj.

16 Sauce for seafood

17 Fashion figure

18 Large, at Starbucks

21 Silkwood co-star

24 Pitcairn, for one: abbr.

30 Crime writer Rule

31 Early editorial cartoonist

32 Do lots?

Merl Reagle