Creative Loafing Tampa — November 9, 2023 by Chava Communications

NOVEMBER 09-15, 2023 (VOL.36, NO.45) • $FREE CREATIVE LOAFING - CLTAMPABAY.COM

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PUBLISHER James Howard EDITOR-IN-CHIEF Ray Roa STAGE PHOTOGRAPHY OF TAMPA VIA JOBSITE THEATER/FLICKR

Editorial DIGITAL EDITOR Colin Wolf MANAGING EDITOR Kyla Fields THEATER CRITIC Jon Palmer Claridge FILM & TV CRITIC John W. Allman IN-HOUSE WITCH Caroline DeBruhl CONTRIBUTORS Josh Bradley, Jennifer Ring, Eric Snider, Arielle Stevenson PHOTOGRAPHER Dave Decker FALL INTERN Inquire by emailing rroa@cltampa.com Creative Services CREATIVE DIRECTOR Jack Spatafora GRAPHIC DESIGNER Joe Frontel ILLUSTRATORS Dan Perkins, Cory Robinson, Bob Whitmore Advertising SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Anthony Carbone, Scott Zepeda Events and Marketing MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND EVENTS DIRECTOR Leigh Wilson MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND EVENTS COORDINATOR Kristin Bowman SOCIAL MEDIA AND MARKETING MANAGER Corrie Miserendino

The awards highlight the richness of our region’s professional theater community.

Circulation CIRCULATION MANAGER Ted Modesta

chavagroup.com cltampabay.com cldeals.com EDITORIAL POLICY — Creative Loafing Tampa Bay is a publication covering public issues, the arts and entertainment. In our pages appear views from across the political and social spectrum. They do not necessarily represent the views of the publisher. Creative Loafing Tampa is published by Tampa Events & Media, LLC, 633 N Franklin St., Suite 735. Tampa, Florida, 33602.

Jobsite among Theatre Tampa Bay winners, p. 41.

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Chava Communications Group FOUNDER, CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER Michael Wagner CO-FOUNDER, CHIEF MARKETING OFFICER Cassandra Yardeni Wagner OPERATIONS DIRECTOR Hollie Mahadeo DIRECTOR OF AGENCY SERVICES Mindi Overman SOCIAL MEDIA DIRECTOR Meradith Garcia DIRECTOR OF DIGITAL CONTENT STRATEGY Colin Wolf ART DIRECTOR David Loyola DIGITAL OPERATIONS COORDINATOR Jaime Monzon

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This would be detrimental to all these businesses..

Community pushes back on proposed 1 a.m. closure in Ybor CIty, p. 17.

The newspaper is produced and printed on Indigenous land belonging to Tampa Bay’s Tocobaga and Seminole tribes.

ON THE COVER: Photo by Michael Dupre. Design by Joe Frontel.

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MICHAEL DUPRE

/food Meat me there /music Hootie’s back /news St. Pete senior gets more time to fix home /arts A Buc’s life /slideshows Rise Up concert photos

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Do more

Photos by Dave Decker

ast Thursday at Tampa City Council, elected officials resoundingly heard a community tell it that a proposal to close Ybor City at 1 a.m. would only hurt the historic district and not solve the kind of violence that erupted last weekend when two people were killed during an early morning shooting on Seventh Avenue. In the hours before the council meeting, Moms Demand Action organized a vigil and march through Ybor City. Family of one of the victims, 20-year-old Harrison Boonstoppel,

expressed sympathy for the family of the other 14-year-old Elijah Wilson, and called for an end to gun violence. WLRN said Tampa’s Democratic State Rep. Dianne Hart also expressed her condolences and added that last Sunday’s tragedy is not the only shooting to care about. “Every single week in my district I’m losing a young person,” Hart said. “Gun violence is taking over East Tampa, West Tampa and out in Suitcase City.” Read more on p. 17, and see more photos via cltampa.com/slideshows.—Ray Roa

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do this

Tampa Bay's best things to do from November 09 - 16 Wines of a time

COURTESY

It was almost canceled this year, but residents rallied to keep Dunedin Wines the Blues alive, and the city listened. The party may be scaled back a little, like in the early days, but it’s happening. Talent taking over downtown includes Betty Fox, RJ Howson, Soulfish Band, “Tbone” Hamilton, and a tribute band that will help remember Wendy Barmore, a regular performer on the city’s live music scene who died last March at the age of 68. Read more on p. 43. Dunedin Wines the Blues: Saturday-Sunday, Nov. 11-12. Pioneer Park, 420 Main St., Dunedin. No cover (wine tasting stroll tickets still available for $50). dunedinwinestheblues.com—Jennifer Ring

Tampa’s just three months removed from the homegrown “Tabernacle Of Oddities” curated by the folks at Ybor City’s Dysfunctional Grace, but a touring expo featuring horrifically fun, and legal, collectibles is in downtown Tampa this weekend. Vendors from across the country are part of the lineup, which includes Florida artists like Orlando’s Jen Belak (work pictured). Extras include a rabbit taxidermy class and the Oddities Museum’s “Cryptic Collection of a Mad Clown.” Kids under five get in free, but the festival won’t pay for any therapy they might need in the aftermath.

UNITED TALENT

Stay curious

Tampa Oddities & Curiosities Expo 2023: Saturday, Nov. 11, 10 a.m.-6 p.m. $6 & up. Tampa Convention Center. 333 S Franklin St., Tampa. odditiesandcuriositiesexpo.com—Ray Roa

@SHOP_HEEBIE_JEEBIES/INSTAGRAM

Greek freak

It’s hard not to look at the different parts of Stavros Halkias’ body: The ratty ‘stachegoatee combo, the gap-toothed smile, his belly, whatever is rolled inside of the pants of his velour suits. The Baltimore-based comedian and podcaster (“Cum Town”) has a hilarious laugh, too, and you’ll hear a lot of it when the 34-year-old brings his standup act—self-depreciating, crude, rife with insults and masterful crowd work—to Tampa. Stavros Halkias - The Fat Rascal Tour: Friday, Nov. 10, 7 p.m. $36 & up. Carol Morsani Hall at David A. Straz Center for the Performing Arts. 1010 N Macinnes Pl., Tampa. strazcenter.org—Ray Roa

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See more (and submit your event) @ cltampa.com Into the NightVale

Fans of the popular “Welcome to Night Vale” podcast will be happy to hear that the gang is back in downtown Tampa for another live show. Pack your bags and get ready to join Cecil Baldwin, Symphony Sanders, and surprise guests playing fan favorite characters for a trip to the fictitious small desert town of Night Vale, “where every conspiracy theory is true.” CITYOFTEMPLETERRACE/FACEBOOK

Welcome to Night Vale: Thursday, Nov. 16, 8 p.m. $29.50 & up. Tampa Theatre. 711 N. Franklin St., Tampa. tampatheatre.org—Jennifer Ring

Feeling crafty

There are some pretty amazing historic homes in Temple Terrace, and they’re all mostly a short walk or drive away from the 50th annual Temple Terrace Arts & Crafts Festival happening this weekend. There’ll be live music, but the stars of the two-day festival are the more than 100 artists, craftspeople and culinarians that the Temple Terrace Arts Council has tapped to set up under the oak trees at Woodmont Park. Parking is free, and if you’re new to town, do not speed in Temple Terrace.

Look up

HUGO/ADOBE

Last month, Debi Johnson, President of the River Tower Foundation, told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that the Sulphur Springs landmark was getting its first bath in three-and-a-half decades. The pressure washing has started, and the full makeover—which includes a paint job—will take weeks. And if you’ve never spent a day in the shadow of the 214-foot icon, then clear your calendar this weekend. River Tower Festival, one of the most fun and familyfriendly ways to raise money for Sulphur Springs revitalization, takes over the surrounding park and includes vendors, food, adult drinks, kids activities and more. No pets allowed, but kids under 10 do get in free.

NIGHTVALERADIO/TWITTER

Temple Terrace Arts & Crafts Fest: Saturday-Sunday, Nov. 11-12. No cover. Woodmont Park, 407 Woodmont Ave., Temple Terrace. templeterraceartscouncil. org—Ray Roa

River Tower Festival 2023: Saturday, Nov 11, 1 p.m.-10 p.m. $20-$25. River Tower Park, 401 E Bird St., Tampa. rivertowerfestival.org—Ray Roa

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ATTILA ADAM/ADOBE

CITY LIFE: Locals said an Ybor City curfew would hurt local businesses.

Loud and clear

Community rejects proposal to close Ybor City at 1 a.m.—but the police chief says the ‘Orlando model’ looks ‘promising.’ By Arielle Stevenson and Ray Roa

proposed 1 a.m. curfew in Ybor City appears to be off the table after dozens of residents and business owners spoke out last Thursday. Tampa City Council member Gwen Henderson, whose district includes Ybor City, suggested a 1 a.m. curfew for six months in response to last month’s shooting that killed two people. “What effects will this [closure] have on the economy?” Tom DeGeorge, president and generarl manager of Crowbar, said at the city council meeting. “With the rising cost of rent, people can barely pay their bills. I think this would be detrimental to all these businesses.” Even without the public pushback against the curfew, Tampa’s City Attorney Andrea Zelman told council that such a curfew wasn’t

legally advisable. Instead, she drafted a possible juvenile curfew ordinance for consideration. “We don’t have a mechanism to tell businesses to shut down wholesale at a particular time,” Zelman said at the meeting. “The one exception to that is the Florida Statutes expressly allow for a juvenile curfew, and so that’s why we are bringing that to you.” Shots were fired on 7th Avenue early in the morning on Oct. 29, killing a 14-year-old boy named Elijah Wilson and a 22-year-old named Harrison Boonstoppel. An additional 15 people were wounded. One suspect, Tyrell Stephen Phillips, is charged with second-degree murder and pleaded not guilty at his arraignment last Friday. Two additional suspects are still at large, and the FBI created a portal for anonymous tips.

LOCAL NEWS

Zelman said the Florida Supreme Court found the city’s original juvenile curfew, adopted in the ‘90s, unconstitutional. The city’s Ybor Child Protection ordinance, which is still on the books, hasn’t been enforced due to similar concerns that the code could be unconstitutional. If passed, the juvenile curfew proposal would also “clean up the code” in the Ybor Child Protection ordinance to be “100% consistent with Florida Statutes,” according to Zelman. To pass the juvenile curfew, the council must have two public readings before a final vote. However, some studies have shown that juvenile curfews aren’t effective in preventing crime. Kristen Henning, director of the Juvenile Justice Clinic at Georgetown University, told NPR last year that curfews often target Black communities.

“Several studies across the country have shown that juvenile curfews are ineffective both at reducing crime and reducing victimization,” Henning told NPR. “In some cities, we’ve seen that, you know, crime has gone up instead of down, so they aren’t effective.” In September, Time reported on how cities keep using juvenile curfews despite proven ineffectiveness at reducing crime. Included was a 2015 study looking at youth curfew’s impact on gun violence in Washington, D.C., which showed curfews increased incidents of gun violence. “We find that contrary to its goal of improving public safety, D.C.’s juvenile curfew increases the number of gunfire incidents by 69% [during curfew hours],” the study states. continued on page 20

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continued from page 17

For longtime community advocate Connie Burton, the recent shooting is an example of the lack of investment in the city’s youth from lower socioeconomic backgrounds. “You do not want to pour real money into these communities and expect those issues to solve themselves?” Burton said at the meeting. “They will not. There’s going to be more killings.” And even before the meeting, locals and hospitality experts chimed in. “This kind of violence is prevalent throughout the country. It’s even more prevalent here in the state of Florida, due to our legislature,” DeGeorge told CL, alluding to relaxed permitless concealed carry in the Sunshine State. DeGeorge—a prominent member of the coalition that secured $15 billion in relief for

What relationship does the shooting have to the venue’s and to what extent? Do the venues have proper security? And how often does a shooting or some kind of a high level of violence or disturbance occur in the venues?,” Peters said. If so, he added, the city should work with venues to improve their security. He pointed to recent events in El Paso and Philadelphia where, like in Ybor City last month, the shooting happened in the public space. “In those situations, there was a shooting and it was on the street—none of these really had a relationship directly to the venue,” Peters said. “If it’s a public safety issue on the street, then that requires a different approach. Closing the establishment earlier doesn’t necessarily move the people that may have been coming there in

LOCAL NEWS

DAVE DECKER

Tampa Police Chief Lee Bercaw also presented an update on the shooting to the Council ;ast Thursday. “This wasn’t a situation that brewed,” Bercaw said. “This something that sparked up in seconds and turned to gunfire.” On the night of the shooting, city officials said an estimated 50 TPD officers were in the vicinity. Bercaw said Orlando has experienced a similar spike in violent crime between the hours of midnight and 4 a.m. “The Orlando model is very promising,” Bercaw said at the meeting. “I think dissecting and analyzing their plan is the first step.” Ybor City’s business owners and service industry workers might want to pay attention to what advice Bercaw takes from Orlando. Last March, Orlando City Council reportedly passed two controversial new measures to restrict nightlife in downtown Orlando. The first is a sixmonth moratorium on new downtown clubs and the second places myriad restrictions on alcohol sales after midnight. That includes wanding at entrances and additional off-duty officers. Any bar with a capacity of 125 people or more wishing to sell alcohol after midnight has to purchase a $250 permit. The pilot program will be in place until it is reviewed in March 2024. In the recent Ybor City shooting, none of the suspects involved were inside a club at the time of the incident, but on the street. “Chief Bercaw was not referring to one specific Orlando ordinance over another; but rather, their approach in the broader sense,” Eddy Durkin, TPD’s public information officer, told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay via email last Friday afternoon. “He is taking proactive steps to improve safety in the city by reviewing ordinances and best practices from other cities, Orlando being a key comparative, for consideration in Tampa.” CL also contacted the Orlando Police Department’s PIO for more information on the Orlando model—we’ll update this post if they get back. How a juvenile curfew would impact TPD’s policing efforts remains to be seen. Before last Thursday’s meeting, CL asked what a juvenile curfew might look like for officers and is awaiting a response from TPD. In the meantime, council member Gwen Henderson said at the meeting she heard her district loud and clear on the general curfew. “The community has spoken, and I greatly appreciate that,” she said at the meeting. “I don’t feel threatened when I bring something forward because there’s always a teachable moment.” Henderson said at the meeting she plans to look for CRA funding for additional solutions like the Ybor Ambassador program. Council member Lynn Hurtak asked for a community conversation between TPD, residents, business owners, and other concerned parties. A date is yet to be determined.

COMIN’ IN HOT DOG: Crowbar owner Tom DeGeorge. independent venues shuttered by the pandemic—called the proposal to close Ybor City at 1 a.m. knee-jerk reaction. “Mind you 99% of the businesses in this district are not the problem. They are the solution. We pull community together. We give people an outlet to celebrate. We do charitable events all the time, and we give of ourselves,” DeGeorge added. “And we’re all struggling.” Jim Peters, President of Responsible Hospitality Institute (RHI) which has worked with Ybor City business owners in the past, told CL it seems like the proposal is looking for a solution to a problem that officials haven’t researched. “The questions would be: Is it really going to impact the type of shooting that occurred?

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a way that they’re not going to do something in some other parts of the city.” Carlson echoed that sentiment, and told CL that shutting Ybor City down at 1 a.m. will just move partygoers to South Howard. “From a city point of view, we’re not solving the problem by shutting down Ybor early. It’s not solving the problem in Ybor, and it’s not solving it in other parts of the city. It’s just going to continue,” Carlson said, “This is a knee-jerk reaction that is not based on a thoughtful analysis of the situation.” Lifelong Tampeño Vince Pardo was Urban Development Manager for Ybor City Development Corporation from 1999-2015 and has worked with Peters’ RHI on issues related

“Mind you 99% of the businesses in this district are not the problem.”

to the district. He doesn’t necessarily portray clubs as complete angels, but lauds them for doing a lot in the last decade to police themselves. He also shared Carlson’s concern with the 1 a.m. timeline. “Think about what’s going to happen,” Pardo told CL. “If you’re of age, you are probably going to go to another establishment in the city of Tampa, South Howard somewhere else. It’s onea-clock, you’re partying, and going home is not an option.” And in his eyes, people who don’t go elsewhere will potentially loiter outside anyway. “You’ve now created a larger mass of people on the street that have nothing to do. That’s not a good equation,” Pardo said. Pardo added that someone who comes to Ybor City with a gun probably isn’t going to go into a nightclub anyway, considering the fact that they’d be wanded by a metal detector and denied entry. “It almost removes the club,” he said. For Pardo, the problem is how the streets are being managed or not managed by the police department. “Are they congregating in certain areas? Or are they spreading out the manpower on every block so they’re better eyes and ears in the block,” he said. And a juvenile curfew would force cops to randomly stop more people, which might not go over well in a city that’s less than a decade removed from a program that saw Tampa police disproportionately ticket Black bicyclists under the supervision of then-police chief Castor. “Sometimes we find in these situations that there’s a racial component to it because there’s a certain group of people coming downtown that people don’t want,” Peters warned. “They have this reactionary approach under the guise of reducing violence, but it’s not necessarily addressing the fact that you might have a large, young adult population that doesn’t have places to socialize.” People come to public streets, Peters said, because they think it gives them a chance to be with other people. “And it seems to me that the shooting was really two groups, which would probably be an indication of some kind of gang-related activity,” Peters added. “And this is where police have to be more strategic in working with gangs and eliminating the threat from the gangs rather than closing venues.” Closing venues, Peters noted, also disrupts business plans and establishments that employ locals who rely on shifts that might go from 8 p.m.-4 a.m. “All of a sudden they’re going to lose two hours from their shifts. Some of these people work on low wages and a two-hour shift five nights a week, that adds up to 10 hours. If they’re making, say, $20 an hour, that’s $200 dollars a week out of their household income, which is $800 a month, which could equal rent or food or other things,” he said.

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L O U N G E

INTERVIEW BBQ Love Fest

Next Saturday, Nov. 18. 11 a.m.-6 p.m. $65-$129. Perry Harvey Sr. Park, 1000 E Harrison St., Tampa grillandprovisions.com

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Hernandez wanted to pivot yet again towards a cause bigger than barbecue and business—a philanthropic effort with a culinary force behind it. And of course, a variety of Hernandez’s best eats will be on display at next week’s festival, By Kyla Fields too. The Brisket Shoppe’s unique Caribbean he phrase “cooking for a cause” takes many bragging rights, there will be several nationflare makes it stand out among other Southern forms, but one Tampa native has launched ally-recognized pitmasters—some with massive barbecue styles. Oak wood-smoked brisket, ribs a philanthropic event that combines his social media followings—representing their and pulled pork are constants on The Brisket passion for barbecuing with his community- region’s unique style of barbecue. The proShoppe’s menu, but are often served with sides centered ethos. The Brisket Shoppe’s Danny fessional pitmaster lineup includes folks like like tostones, rice and beans, empanadas and Hernandez—alongside a variety of other bar- Anthony DiBernardo of South Carolina’s Swig brisket croquetas. Since West Tampa’s Brisket becue enthusiasts, volunteers, musicians and & Swine BBQ, Texas native Arnis Robbins of Shoppe is only open Thursday-Saturday, that vendors—hosts the inaugural BBQ Love Fest Evie Mae’s Pit Barbecue, Adrian Wright of West means about 20 hours of slow-smoked love is in downtown Tampa next weekput into its variety of barbecued end with the mission of “cooking meats. for a cure.” Hernandez tells CL that he Perry Harvey Sr. Park in has invested tens of thousands Tampa’s Encore district is the host of dollars of his own money into of the first-ever BBQ Love Fest, BBQ Love Fest’s inaugural event, happening from 11 a.m.-6 p.m. on alongside funding from a variety Saturday, Nov. 18. This familyof sponsors and donated time friendly event is free for children and food from his all-star pitunder the age of 12 and offers masters and friends. Although discounted admission for first next Saturday marks the very responders. Tickets ($65 for general first installment of this soon-toadmission, $129 for VIP) include be annual festival, Hernandez barbecue samples from 20 local is confident in BBQ Love Fest’s cook teams and the “Pitmaster’s future and hopes 2024’s rendiShowcase,” access to a variety of tion is even larger. He compares grilling-related vendors, live music the potential of BBQ Love Fest to and the chance to vote for your Tampa’s annual Pig Jig festival— favorite plate of the day. Keep those a once-small party that started debit cards loaded up, because BBQ in a backyard has evolved into a Love Fest is also a cashless event. massive event over the years, with From ribs, brisket and barbecue national headliners and millions chicken to sausages, burnt ends of charitable dollars raised. and all of the classic cookout sides, “It’s a homegrown product every style and region or barbecue that’s gonna stay here in Tampa’s will be represented. food space—specifically its barAll proceeds raised by this becue space. And we’re ready to celebration of food, fundraising create a community by raising and entertainment benefit three KING OF THE GRILL: Tampa native Danny Hernandez organizes the philanthropic BBQ Love Fest. dollars that are benefiting people nonprofits close to Hernandez’s right here in Tampa,” Hernandez heart: FARA (Friedreich’s Ataxia Research Virginia’s Dem 2 Brothers, Instagram-famous rant counterpart The Brisket Shoppe started says. “And since it’s the first year, we’re defiAlliance), Operation BBQ Relief—an organiza- Mel Chmilar (@darksideofthegrill) hailing all slinging Cuban-inspired barbecue, smoked on nitely gonna learn from it. There’s gonna be tion that provides food in the wake of natural the way from Alberta, Canada and private chef native Florida wood out of a massive 1,000 gal- bumps like everything else, but I think if we disasters—and the veteran-focused Special Antonio Harris aka The Butter Knife Shawty lon barbecue pit. do the right thing and we get the right supGrill & Provisions and The Brisket Shoppe port, fans of us and fans of barbecue in general Operations Memorial Foundation. “My friend from Georgia. At-home barbecue enthusiasts Paul Avery, who contributed to the national with this season’s newest Blackstone might now share a parcel of land at 3501 N Armenia are going to show up and help us cut checks to growth of Outback Steakhouse, has a child who want to take a few notes from these respected Ave. in West Tampa. “This is definitely the last three amazing causes.” is battling Friedreich’s ataxia. So I wanted to industry professionals, all while sampling their evolution of my business—it’s my swan song,” For the latest information on the very first Hernandez says about Grill & Provisions and BBQ Love Fest and its lineup of both profescook for a cause that was close to my heart,” tastiest eats. Hernandez explains. Although this is the first time BBQ Love The Brisket Shoppe. sional pitmasters and local cook teams, head In addition to the 20 “backyard BBQ teams” Fest for the Bay area, Hernandez has a lifelong Now that both the retail store and restau- to grillandprovisions.com or head to @bbqlovecompeting for the grand prize of $10,000 and relationship with barbecue, West Tampa and rant have been up and running for a few years, festival on Instagram.

Inaugural BBQ Love Fest raises funds for three nonprofits.

the community that connects the two. His parents opened the first Pipo’s Cuban Café in the late-1970s, and the building he operates his barbecue restaurant and grill store out of boasts even older ties to the Cuban families that founded La Segunda and the now-closed Faedo Family Bakery. By 2018, Hernandez was operating five Holy Hog BBQ locations between its brick and mortars, food trucks and a vendor spot inside Tampa’s Amalie Arena. But after enduring the long process of healing from serious kitchen fire burns, Hernandez decided to pivot slightly and open his retail store Grill & Provisions in 2019. By 2021, that space expanded and its restau-

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Sun’s out, buns out

Tampa Bay Burger Week returns, FLocale food hall closes, and more local food news. By Kyla Fields

ach year, Creative Loafing Tampa Bay teams up with dozens of local bars and restaurants to offer foodies a variety of unique burgers and accompanying sides. In addition to several take-out and dine-in burger deals, this 10 daylong collaboration also features drink specials, social media giveaways and the chance to vote for your favorite burger in Tampa Bay. Tampa Bay Burger Week 2023 started on Thursday, Nov. 2 and runs until Sunday, Nov. 12. There are almost 50 restaurants participating in this year’s Burger Week—from local institutions like El Cap, Ferg’s and Gigglewaters to burger-centric spots like Nebraska Mini-Mart and Butter’s Burgers, plus scenic, waterfront restaurants including St. Pete Pier’s Teak and Hula Bay. Even local bars and breweries like

Shuffle, TBBC, Bar Fly, Florida Avenue Brewing Co. and Walk-On’s will offer unique takes on the common burger. If you’d like to participate in any of these restaurants’ deals throughout this weekend, all you have to do is ask an employee about its featured Burger Week special. While prices may vary, Burger Week specials may cost about $20 at the most (like Mad Dogs & Englishmen’s pub burger paired with a crisp white ale) and around $10 on the lower end (like TBBC’s Cuban-inspired burger with pulled pork and smashed plantains). For the full line-up of participating Burger Week concepts on both sides of the bridge, head to tampabayburgerweek.com. And for all the

plant-based folks out there, 3 Dot Dash will also sling its “Up in Smoke” burger, while Brandon’s Vine Vegan features a plant-based burger topped with bacon onion jam. The Independent Bar & Cafe in Seminole Heights will offer a vegetarianfriendly frisco melt. A portion of sales from 2023’s Tampa Bay Burger Week benefit Feeding Tampa Bay, a local nonprofit that aims to end food insecurity across 10 Central Florida counties. Sponsors for this year’s Burger Week include Wild Turkey Bourbon Whiskey, Florida Man Hot Sauce, and Dunedin Fine Arts Food Workshops. And if you truly can’t get enough of Tampa Bay Burger Week, head to its website to learn more about this year’s social media contest, where

FOOD NEWS

winners will receive gift certificates from participating restaurants. For the latest information on Tampa Bay Burger Week and its various deals, head to @cltampabay on Instagram. Seminole Heights’ Flocale food hall is closed A year-and-a-half after opening, Seminole Heights’ Flocale has closed. Last week, Travis Masters, former CEO of Westshore Pizza and partner at the multi-concept dining hall, told CL that Flocale (stylized as “FLocalé”) fell victim to a slow summer and that business dropped off a cliff in July. He said about 30 fulland-part-time employees lost jobs last week, adding that they are being paid for their last day, although the restaurant did not open doors. continued on page 34

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Cooper’s Hawk Winery & Restaurant expands to Wesley Chapel this month A popular wine and restaurant chain will soon spread its wings further across the Tampa Bay area. Cooper’s Hawk Winery & Restaurant

opens its second Tampa Bay location at 28963 SR-56 in Wesley Chapel on Monday, Nov. 20. The concept is a destination for both food and wine-lovers alike, complete with a fine dining experience, wine tasting room, full-service bar and artisanal retail market. Its upcoming Wesley Chapel location can seat a whopping 416 patrons between the indoor dining room, tasting area and outdoor patio. The “modern artisanal” style building draws inspiration from the Sunshine State’s architectural heritage, “evoking the Florida cracker style with a take on the Georgian four-square hip-roof in the entry tower,” according to a press release. In addition to the concept’s wide variety of wines which range from char-

delivered right to their doorstep, among other benefits. There are several locations of Cooper’s Hawk Winery & Restaurant in every corner of the state in cities like Jacksonville, Fort Myers and Miami, although Wesley Chapel’s upcoming concept is Tampa Bay’s second location of the nationwide franchise. If Wesley Chapel’s Cooper’s Hawk boasts the same operating hours as its Tampa counterpart, it will be open from 11 a.m.-9 p.m. Sunday-Thursday and 11 a.m.-10 p.m. on Fridays and Saturdays. For the latest updates on Cooper’s Hawk Winery & Restaurant’s second location in Wesley Chapel, head to its Facebook at @chtampafl or Instagram at @chwinery.

FOOD NEWS

CITYOFSTPETE/FLICKR

continued from page 31 “The decision was made yesterday,” Masters told CL about the closure on Monday, Oct. 30. The food hall—located at 5910 N Florida Ave.—was home to King of the Coop, Westshore Pizza, Slide hot dogs and burgers, and even an axe throwing concept. Joe Dodd, owner of King of the Coop, told CL that he was not part of the decision to close Flocale altogether. “There was a call with investors last Thursday, and that’s pretty much when I knew I was done,” Dodd said, adding that he immediately started working on a landing place. On social media last week, he announced King of the Coop’s closure at FLocale, plus plans to open out of Cigar City Cider & Mead in Ybor City. Dodd told CL he would like to be open in Ybor City by this week, and that he did not know Flocale would announce a closure until the day of. “Honest to god, I wish I could take all our employees with us, but technically we’re opening a new location and have to build the business up,” Dodd said, adding that he’s willing to give recommendations to any employers looking for restaurant staff. “I wish I could take every single one of them. Financially, I can’t. I’m hoping that we’ll be able to build business up and those that still need jobs that we’re able to help.” Joining Dodd in the move to Ybor City is the crew from Matt’s Fat Cookies, which had a presence at Flocale, too. Dodd says that moving into a smaller space out of Cigar City’s cider and mead shop at 1812 N 15th St. gives him a chance to pare down the menu to tenders, wings, and one sandwich. He hopes to add Sunday-only bone-in chicken once the location gets going. “I’m looking at this as not backwards but forwards,” Dodd said, adding that King of the Coop’s Westchase location is still a go, but experiencing construction and supply-chain-related delays. As far as Flocale, Masters told CL that it wasn’t as if the food hall didn’t have a lot of customers, just not enough. “I appreciate the community and their support and their coming out. Being born and raised in Tampa, I appreciate everybody who’s in Tampa trying to support a local business,” Masters added. “It’s unfortunate it wasn’t enough but that’s not that’s not on individual patrons. It’s just a sum total of everybody is not just wasn’t enough.” Masters said that landlords of the Flocale building are in talks with founders of Westshore Pizza about possibly taking over the lease. “I think that would actually be a good thing,” Masters said. You know, if Bob [Bobby Vasaturo, owner of original Westshore Pizza] can resurrect the space and you know, help that staff and community.”—Ray Roa

DINNER & A SHOW: Mahaffey Theater’s fine dining restaurant is slated to debut this fall. donnays and pinot noirs to merlots and moscato, Cooper’s Hawk’s restaurant also offers a spread of classic high-end fare including entrees like surf and turf, pan-roasted mahi mahi, braised short rib risotto and gnocchi carbonara. Its wine, food and cocktail menus can be browsed on chwinery.com. CEO Tim McEnery launched the first Cooper’s Hawk Winery & Restaurant in 2005 and the company now boasts over 50 locations across the country. The winery and restaurant also offers a wine club where participants pay a subscription fee in exchange for monthly bottles of wine

34 | NOVEMBER 09-15, 2023 | cltampabay.com

Tampa Bay’s first Yard House will now open on Dec. 3 Though the opening date has been bumped back a few times, Tampa Bay’s first Yard House says it’s finally ready to debut this December. According to the website, the new Water Street location at 450 Channelside Dr. will now open on Dec. 3. The new Amalie Arena-adjacent Yard House was first announced back in March of 2022, and last summer the location set a tentative opening date of Oct. 9, 2023. This new Yard House location is expected to be gigantic. The 16,400-square-foot sports bar

will feature over 100 on-tap beers, with a modern industrial interior and outdoor seating area, as well as a menu spanning everything from burgers to poke bowls and vegan options. Yard House is a considered a high-end bar chain from the folks at Orlando-based Darden Restaurant Group, which also owns Olive Garden, LongHorn Steakhouse, Capital Grille, Bahama Breeze and Eddie V’s Prime Seafood, among other things. The chain currently has over 80 locations nationwide, with the closest in Icon Park in Orlando.—Colin Wolf Mahaffey Theater will open new fine dining restaurant led by seasoned St. Pete chef Looks like CL will have to update the “Tampa Bay’s best restaurant and bar patios with ridiculously scenic views” dining guide soon, because a popular St. Pete hotspot has plans to open its own waterfront restaurant. A few weeks ago, Bill Edwards—who owns that entertainment company that operates the city-owned Mahaffey Theater—told St. Pete’s city council that a new fine dining restaurant called Sonata will soon open out of the popular event space. According to the St. Pete Catalyst, The Mill’s former managing partner and executive chef Ted Dorsey will helm the kitchen of this new restaurant, which will feature “coastal cuisine presented with Southern hospitality in an elegant atmosphere.” The high-end restaurant will utilize the theater’s already-existing kitchen that was previously used for catering orders and events. The Tampa Bay Times says that Sonata will open out of the theater’s lobby and occupy two floors, with the balcony dining area slated to open before the ground floor’s “lower atrium and patio space.” Although there’s no slated opening date for Sonata, its social media says the new St. Pete concept will debut at 400 1st St. S sometime this fall. The restaurant’s new Toast page says it will open for lunch and dinner Tuesday-Sunday. Longtime chef Ted Dorsey—who’s resume includes popular Tampa Bay concepts like Mise en Place, Ciro’s Speakeasy and Hotel Zamora—was most recently Executive Chef of St. Pete restaurant The Mill, which specialized in rustic New American cuisine.The Mill unexpectedly closed its Central Avenue location earlier this year after citing issues with neighboring construction, but the Tampa Bay Business Journal reported that the restaurant “faced three liens totaling $154,250 due to unresolved tax liabilities” around the time of its closure. The Mill’s South Tampa restaurant is still up and running. Other topics that Edwards discussed with St. Pete City Council last week included electrical and maintenance issues at the Mahaffey Theater, as well as its recent artistic collaboration with the Imagine Museum. Head to Sonata’s new Facebook page for the latest news on its upcoming grand opening.

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36 | NOVEMBER 09-15, 2023 | cltampabay.com

THINGS TO DO MOVIES

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ART

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Among us

‘ROUND HERE: Lakeland’s Circle B is home to some of the most viral gator videos in Florida.

The best Tampa Bay parks and hikes for seeing alligators in the wild. By Colin Wolf

here’s an old Florida saying that goes something like “You should always assume there’s a gator in every body of water,” and as any wildlife official will tell you, this is mostly true. The Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission (FWC) estimates that there’s roughly 1.3 million American alligators in the state of Florida, and on any given day, they can be found in every county, city, gated community, golf course, retention pond, river, lake or roadside ditch. Gators are everywhere. Here in Tampa Bay, we have our fair share of swamp puppies, and as the weather cools, our cold-blooded buddies are forced to lay out in the sun to regulate body temps. So, the fall and winter months are often the best times of the year to see our reptilian friends in the wild. What follows are some of the more “gatory spots” in the Tampa Bay area. You’ll find everything from low-key city parks, shady rural boardwalks, and even some hardcore hikes (one

of which requires a permit because there’s too many gators). But if you’re going to head out lookin’ for alligators this weekend, it should be noted that while attacks are extremely rare, you should always be extra cautious. Here are some important tips to consider from the FWC: • If you come across a gator on a trail or the river, give it a lot of space. Don’t walk or paddle up to it. • It’s actually illegal to mess around with gators, so just admire from afar. • Do not feed gators. You’re just training it to associate people with food, which is bad, and will result in someone getting hurt or the gator getting euthanized. • Exercise extra caution in during mating season, which typically runs from May to June, depending on temperatures.

• Alligators are most active between dusk and dawn, so it’s best to avoid water after dark. • Keep your dog on a leash. Dogs are basically chicken tendies to gators. So, it’s also best to avoid walking dogs along shorelines. • If you see a baby gator, stay away. Momma gators can be very aggressive. • If you see a gator somewhere where it’s not supposed to be (like a school or a parking lot), or you believe it’s a threat to someone’s safety, you can report it to the FWC’s Nuisance Alligator Hotline at 866-FWC-GATOR (866-392-4286). Al Lopez Park There’s a lot to do at Al Lopez Park, but the northside of this Tampa westside gem is a little more naturey, and offers a surprisingly nice boardwalk through the trees and plenty of views of the big pond. There’ve been a few viral videos of some big ol’ boys in here, and a dog was eaten by a gator back in 2008, so watch your step. 4810 N Himes Ave., Tampa. visittampabay.com Boyd Hill Nature Preserve There be monsters here. Over the years, Boyd Hill has been home to some giant gators

HAKOAR/ADOBE

sightings. Back in 2013, a 13-footer was illegally “harvested” from Lake Maggiore, and the city park regularly hosts “alligator walks” to spot their many scaly friends. There’s also plenty of trails, a boardwalk and a playground for the kiddos. 1101 Country Club Wy. S, St. Petersburg. stpeteparksrec.org/boydhillpreserve Carillon Nature Reserve When it comes to spotting gators in the wild, Carillon Park is probably one of the more underrated (and undersized) parks in Tampa Bay. Located within a literal business park, the space has plenty of parking and a near mile-long trail around a tiny lake. The main attraction here is the loop with boardwalks and bridges, giving visitors a nice vantage point for wildlife. There’s a surprisingly large amount of wildlife packed into this small place, so be on the lookout for gators, turtles, fish and everything in between. Unnamed Road, 100 Carillon Pkwy., St. Petersburg Circle B Bar Reserve It’s a bit of a drive, but Circle B is probably one of the gatoriest spots near Tampa Bay. The continued on page 38

cltampabay.com | NOVEMBER 09-15, 2023 | 37

continued from page 37 1,267-acre nature reserve is home to some of the most viral gator videos in Florida. There’s plenty of trails here, but the 1-mile Alligator Alley Trail is a good place to start, considering it’s short, mostly shaded, and follows a boardwalk to the extremely gatory Lake Hancock. Leave the dog at home. 4399 Winter Lake Rd., Lakeland. polknature.com Dell Holmes Park This Pinellas County park sits along Lake Maggiore, and in terms of gators, the area has been known to be home to some absolute units. One of the largest on record was back In 2013, when trappers removed a 13-foot, 770 pound gator. Attacks are extremely rare, but just in the last few years there have been quite a few incidents of tragic human and gator interactions in this specific body of water, so it wouldn’t hurt to exercise caution. Also, on a non-gator-related note, there’s an excellent splash pad and playground here. 2741 22nd St. S, St. Petersburg. stpeteparksrec.org/dellholmes

massive apex predators aren’t your thing, the park also has two playgrounds and a dog park. 2200 E Lake Rd. S, Palm Harbor. pinellas.gov John S. Taylor Park This Largo gem features a popular disc golf course, a playground, access to the Pinellas Trail, and a 53-acre freshwater lake with some extra large gators in it. Though encounters are extremely rare, the park has been in the headlines for alligator incidents recently. Back in 2022 a man looking for his frisbee died of an apparent alligator attack here. And, in a separate incident, another guy looking for his discs was bitten in the face in 2020. So, if you accidentally lose a frisbee in the water at John S. Taylor Park, just let it go. It’s gone. 1100 8th Ave. SW, Largo. pinellas.gov/parks

tower. You’ll see ‘em, they’re out there. Plus, there’s a playground near the parking lot to get all the kiddo’s zoomies out. 6920 East Fletcher Avenue, Tampa. hillsboroughcounty.org Morris Bridge Conservation Park Part of the Hillsborough River watershed, Morris River Bridge is a great place for spotting gators. There’s a short, shady hike along a boardwalk loop that’s ideal for little legs that can’t last long. There’s also a canoe and kayak launch area here, as well as access to the nearby, and more intense, Flatwoods 7-mile loop. 13630 Morris Bridge Rd., Thonotosassa. hillsboroughcounty.org

THINGS TO DO

Lake Seminole Park Lake Seminole Park is a designated wildlife sanctuary, so you already know the gator’n is

Myakka River State Park Not exactly in the immediate Tampa Bay area, but Myakka is definitely worth the drive. For the most hardcore gator peepers, there’s the 2-mile Deep Hole hike, which requires a permit to visit because of the sheer volume

Hillsborough River State Park Legend has it there’s a 14-footer that lives by the kayak launch, so keep your arms and hands inside the boat at all times. Kayak rentals are probably the best way to see gators at this popular local state park, but there’s also a shaded 1.2-mile hiking loop (the Rapids Trail) that follows the riverbank and caps off with a swinging suspension bridge over the Hillsborough River. Keep an eye on the banks of the river, they’re there. 15402 U.S.-Hwy-301, Thonotosassa. floridastateparks.org John B Sargeant Sr. Park A popular kayak and fishing spot, John B Sargeant Sr. Park also has a solid quarter-mile boardwalk loop and a fishing pier overlooking where Flint Creek meets the Hillsborough River. For the boaters, you can also access the Hillsborough River State Canoe Trail here, which is prime for gator watchin’. 12702 U.S. Hwy-301 N, Thonotosassa. hillsboroughcounty.org John Chesnut Sr. Park This 255-acre park hugs the edge of Lake Tarpon and features a nice boardwalk and trail loop through the woods and along the water. There’s plenty of gators in Lake Tarpon, but there’s also been a few rare American crocodile sightings. In 2013, an 11-foot, 700-pound croc was trapped and removed from the freshwater lake. But if

LES/ADOBE

Edward Medard Conservation Park There’s a filthy amount of alligators here. As one of the largest parks in Hillsborough County, this 700-acre reservoir offers up a kids playground, kayak and canoe rentals, a 3-mile trail loop, as well as a cool little boardwalk and observation tower, where you’ll often see plenty of birds, turtles and of course, gators. 6140 Turkey Creek Rd., Plant City. hillsboroughcounty.org

LETTUCE PRAY: Lettuce Lake Park is probably one of the safer spots to take the kids to see a gator. good. The 255-acre park has a nice 2-mile multipurpose trail that loops around most of it, and gives hikers some nice views of the lake and the flatwood pine forest. There’s also plenty of shaded picnic spots and a playground, if you’re not keen on getting too close to the water. 10015 Park Blvd. N, Seminole. pinellas.gov Lettuce Lake Conservation Park This is probably one of the best and safer spots in the Tampa area to take the kids to see a gator in the wild. When the weather starts to cool, if you visit Lettuce Lake in the afternoon when the sun is high, it’s pretty much a “gator guarantee.” You can rent a canoe or kayak here, but the easiest thing to do is just head down the 3,500-foot boardwalk and climb the observation

38 | NOVEMBER 09-15, 2023 | cltampabay.com

of large gators laying around. But for more casual gator watchers, the park also features a nice driving loop, where you’ll spot plenty of gators, wild birds and a ton of non-native feral hogs. But arguably one of the best things to do with the kids is the boat ride, where you’ll see plenty of gators and learn about the history of the park. 13208 SR-72, Sarasota. floridastateparks.org River Tower Park Named after its historic and decommissioned water tower, River Tower Park sits along the Hillsborough River in Sulphur Springs. According to a 1924 article from the Tampa Tribune, the site was once home to an amusement park, with a giant alligator farm featuring

“thousands of live alligators of all ages on display.” Today, the gator farm is gone, but you can still see those scaly fellas along the banks of the river. Sure, the tower is the main attraction here, but keep an eye out for gatorinos. 401 E Bird St., Tampa Riverhills Park Riverhills Park is an underrated little 10-acre space along the freshwater side of the Hillsborough River in Temple Terrace. It offers a playground, a boat ramp and a kayak launch, as well as a nice little shaded boardwalk that follows the shoreline. Fishing is allowed here, and you’ll probably see at least a couple gators on any given day. If not, then at least know that TacoSon is only a few minutes down the road. 329 S Riverhills Dr., Temple Terrace. templeterrace.gov Rowlett Park Rowlett Park offers some nice little trails and views of the Hillsborough River dam, which is where the City of Tampa gets most of its drinking water. But it also has quite a few gators laying around. There are warning signs here for a reason, some large gators have been removed from this park recently, and there was even a dog fatality here back in 2015. So, while leashed dogs are allowed, please exercise caution near the shoreline. 2401 E Yukon St., Tampa Sawgrass Lake Park More often than not, you’ll spot a couple gators at Sawgrass Lake. The family-friendly 400-acre park has most amenities, but the main attraction here is the lengthy boardwalk through the marshes that ends at a two-story observation tower overlooking the lake. Be on the lookout for armadillos, turtles and grown-ass adults playing Pokemon Go. 7400 25th St. N, St. Petersburg. pinellas.gov/parks Tampa Riverwalk While the Tampa Riverwalk probably has the most amenities (bars, restaurants, playgrounds, splash pads, etc), it also has the lowest chance of seeing a gator. But, keep your eyes peeled, because gators are often spotted bobbing along the brackish waters of the Hillsborough River, or even chilling in the Ulele Spring, which is located on the northern end of the trail near Water Works Park. Downtown Tampa. thetampariverwalk.com Trout Creek Conservation Park As part of the Great Florida Birding and Wildlife Trail, there’s always a good shot at seeing gators here. If it’s your first time here, the Bayshore Trail is a good place to start looking for gators.The county park is a popular kayak and fishing spot, and also offers a nice boardwalk, and a mountain bike trail. 12550 Morris Bridge Rd., Thonotosassa. hillsboroughcounty.org

OPENS NOV 18 AT THE DALÍ

Explore renowned French Impressionist paintings from the Museum of Fine Arts, Boston, alongside the early Salvador Dalí works they inspired. TheDali.org cltampabay.com | NOVEMBER 09-15, 2023 | 39

REMEMBERING VILNA The Holocaust and the Art of Samuel Bak July 29, 2023 to Januar y 7, 2024

40 | NOVEMBER 09-15, 2023 | cltampabay.com

That’ll ‘works

Stageworks wins big at Theater Tampa Bay awards. By Jon Palmer Claridge

heatre Tampa Bay (TTB), the consortium of the region’s professional theaters, held its 2023 awards gala Sunday, Oct. 29 at The Palladium Theater in St. Petersburg. Following a delightful catered reception in the lobby, the crowd moved upstairs into Hough Hall where TTB vice president and charismatic local actor, Andresia Mosley, served as mistress of ceremonies for the second consecutive year. Over the 2022-23 season, 28 diverse judges divided into six panels saw 42 participating professional theater/opera productions. Each judge submitted

numerical scores by secret ballot resulting in 23 awards to honor excellence in theatrical design and production. The awards highlight the richness of our region’s professional theater community on both sides of Tampa Bay. TampaRep’s mounting of Arthur Miller’s classic drama, “All My Sons,” took home five awards, while Stageworks Theatre nabbed nine total awards spread out over four different productions, including a quartet for “The Great American Trailer Park Musical.” The complete list of awards follows:

THEATER

CINEVIEW STUDIOS

Outstanding Scenic Design Of A Play Or Musical Outstanding Performance By An Actor In A Frank Chavez, “Christmas Contigo,” Featured Role In A Musical Or Opera Tyler Putnam, “Norma,” Opera Tampa Stageworks Theatre Outstanding Costume Design Of A Play Or Outstanding Performance By An Actress In A Musical Featured Role In A Musical Or Opera Lisa Chavez, “Norma,” Opera Tampa Meli Mossey, “All My Sons,” Tampa Rep Outstanding Lighting Design Of A Play Or Musical Outstanding Performance By An Actor In A Joseph P. Oshry, “Christmas Contigo,” Leading Role In A Play Stageworks Theatre Ned Averill-Snell, “All My Sons,” Tamparep Outstanding Sound O u t s t a n d i n g Design Of A Play Or Performance By An Actress In A Leading Musical Jeremy Douglass, Role In A Play (Tie) “Misery,” Jobsite S u m m e r Theater Bohnenkamp, “Misery,” Outstanding Direction Jobsite Theater Of A Play Emilia Sargent, “All Christopher My Sons,” Tamparep Jackson, “When The O u t s t a n d i n g Righteous Triumph,” Performance By An Stageworks Theatre Actor In A Leading Role Outstanding Direction In A Musical Or Opera Of A Musical (Tie) Martin Powers, Karla Hartley, “Plaid Tidings,” Straz The Great American Center Trailer Park Musical, O u t s t a n d i n g Stageworks Theatre Performance By An Erica Sutherlin, Actress In A Leading “The Color Purple, Role In A Musical Or “Stageworks Theatre Opera O u t s t a n d i n g Stephanie Doche, Choreography “L’italiana In Algeri,” Heather Krueger, St. Petersburg Opera “The Great American O u t s t a n d i n g Trailer Park Musical,” COLOR OF SUCCESS: Andresia Mosley in Performance By The Stageworks Theatre Ensemble Of A Play Stageworks’ ‘The Color Purple.’ Outstanding Musical “All My Sons,” Direction Tamparep Mark Sforzini, “L’italiana Di Algeri,” St. Outstanding Performance By The Ensemble Petersburg Opera Outstanding Performance By An Actor In A Of A Musical “The Great American Trailer Park Musical,” Featured Role In A Play (Tie) Stageworks Theatre Paul J. Potenza, “Dracula”, Jobsite Theater Jl Rey, “Christmas Contigo,” Stageworks Anna Brennen Award For Outstanding Production Of A Play Theatre “All My Sons,” Tamparep Outstanding Performance By An Actress In A Outstanding Production Of A Musical Featured Role In A Play “The Great American Trailer Park Musical,” Karla Hartley, “A Doll’s House Part 2,” Stageworks Theatre Tamparep

ON VIEW NOW THROUGH APRIL 14, 2024 The Nature of Art looks at the disparate ways humans have engaged in artistic expression to understand our environment, mediate our relationship with nature, and attain a more profound comprehension of our role within the world. The exhibition features select artworks from the MFA Collection, complemented by contemporary works from some of today’s most influential artists, all viewed through the distinctive lens of The Nature of Art.

Henry Koehler, Lake George, Florida, 1881, Oil on canvas, Gift of Spanierman Gallery

cltampabay.com | NOVEMBER 09-15, 2023 | 41

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“Older stakeholders feel like we’re being pinched out in favor of a new culture.” REVIEWS

PROFILES

MUSIC WEEK

Quiet riot

Dunedin Brewery ponders its future in the changing seaside town. By Ray Roa

changes might affect his businesses ability to contribute to his hometown’s downtown culture. “The city came to us and tried to get us to bring in our outdoor seating. We said, ‘No, that that’s not the case. We were grandfathered.’ We gave them the sheet that explains the ordinance highlighting that part,” Bryant, 40, told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. “They came back and actually fought us on our grandfather nature to the point that I was like, ‘They really just called my father a liar.’”

Michael Lyn has already started his entertainment earlier to play nice with a confusing sound ordinance that measures decibel levels differently after 11 p.m. And while some of his managers have been issued citations around the sound ordinance— all while the brewery continues fielding complaints from a single resident in nearby apartments—Dunedin Brewery is finally getting to the point where law enforcement stops by, understands the business is not violating the sound ordinance, and moves along. What’s more is that most of the renters across Douglass Avenue come out to their patios to hear music when Dunedin Brewery brings music outside in the daytime for special events like Oktoberfest. “Culture is our de facto business. Music is free here, it’s for the community. I want to expose as many people as possible to what I find to be relevant, interesting, and worthwhile art from across the country,” he said. “And I want to expose Dunedin, and all it has to offer, to these musicians.” There’s a stay on enforcement of the old outdoor ordinance, which means Dunedin Brewery will have to wait to see what its future holds, but Michael Lyn may have some time before any changes happen. In an email to CL, Dunedin Mayor Julie Ward Bujalski wrote, “At this point, we do not have any changes to discuss. We are working with the downtown task force quarterly but we do not have any changes confirmed at this point.” That task force recently changed into Dunedin’s new Business Resident City Council (BRCC), but Michael Lyn said the BRCC could do better in fostering communication between residents and local businesses. A representative for the city also told CL that Dunedin is working on a brand refresh which features the downtown core—including live music—as a brand pillar. Still, Michael Lyn worries about long-term consequences of a revamped outdoor dining ordinance. “Changes could really affect numerous people in town, especially the older stakeholders that feel like we’re being pinched out in favor of a new culture,” he said. Michael Lyn stopped short of calling it a culture of quiet, but did say that there is an element of the city wanting to perhaps party in the day and go to bed early. “The new ordinance really could hurt businesses if the language included a curfew.”

LOCAL NEWS

DAVE DECKER

hen Dunedin’s Wines the Blues Festival opens this weekend, the effort to pull off the 33rd iteration of the town’s beloved concert won’t be overlooked. Over the summer, when organizers said they’d have to cancel 2023 due to lack of funding, businesses and everyday people pitched in to make sure Wines The Blues still found itself in downtown’s Pioneer Park for an afternoon of music. The festival, locals decided, was part of downtown Dunedin’s identity, even in a scaled-back format. In the coming months, the city of about 36,000 will have to make even more decisions about what its downtown core is and isn’t. A year ago, city officials agreed to “fast-track changes to the Land Development Code that would permit restaurants and taverns to keep outdoor dining initiated during the pandemic,” according to TBN. Like other municipalities, Dunedin relaxed rules on outdoor dining to give restaurants a chance at staying open while the world worked on a COVID-19 vaccine that could make it safer to gather indoors. That meant more businesses taking advantage of their outdoor areas, in spite of a nearly-12-year-old outdoor dining ordinance that places restrictions on restaurants that wished to obtain a permit to serve food and drink outside. In part, Dunedin’s 2011 outdoor dining ordinance requires permit holders to have a maximum of 24 outdoor seats or 25% of the business’ licensed capacity—whichever is less. The ordinance also includes a curfew-like requirement forcing patrons to vacate the outdoor area by 11 p.m. Sunday-Thursday, and before midnight on Friday-Saturday. A caveat of the 2011 ordinance said that any outdoor business that existed prior to its passage would “be considered a grandfathered nonconforming use.” In most city codes, regulations allow grandfathered uses to continue and to expand on site until they are removed by economic or other forces. As the City of Dunedin tries to rein in and update its outdoor dining ordinance, Michael Lyn Bryant worries that

than he has; Michael Lyn stays in town because Dunedin is where those relationships—his family, biological and otherwise—are. Live music has been a staple of the Dunedin Brewery existence since day one when Michael Norman booked guitarist and songwriter Sean DeLong. Over the last 13 years, Michael Lyn has turned the brewery’s concert calendar into a gem of Tampa Bay’s music scene that’s not only provided a stage for locals, but watched big names from jam and jazz scenes route through in between sets at bigger festivals around the state. Besides special events, every show at the brewery happens indoors and is always free. Every year, Dunedin’s World Ukulele Day celebra-

CAT’S MEOW: My Cat Umi playing Dunedin Brewery last April. Bryant is general manager at Dunedin Brewery, which his dad Michael Norman Bryant founded in 1995. Michael Lyn went to Washington state for college, and lived in St. Augustine for a year after that, but grew up a kilt-wearing Dunedin kid who played bagpipes in middle school and traveled to the world championships with the City of Dunedin Pipe Band. Some people have worked at the brewery longer

tion features a giant ukulele jam session in the brewery’s courtyard. Michael Lyn’s latest venture next door, The Moon Tower, recently welcomed Wu-Tang Clan’s GZA for a set and rounds of speed chess with locals. The brewery has become something of a destination for touring acts attracted to the venue’s hospitality (the food and beer are killer) and Dunedin’s easygoing vibe.

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C Michael J. Ross and Company w/Fred Johnson Bassist Michael Ross has been a fixture on the Florida West Coast jazz scene since the early 1980s. That’s some serious longevity, made possible by Ross’s impressive technique and feel—he plays exclusively acoustic—his composing skills and an abundance of hard work. The bassist has released several albums as a leader, most recently Giraffe, a worthy set of straight-ahead jazz (with elements of Latin and funk), which he’ll feature on this two-set show. Ross will be in good Company (the same personnel as the album): drummer Walt Hubbard and saxophonist/flutist Danny Jordan—both longtime collaborators—and youngblood Anthony Aldissi, a Gibbs High alum (currently at Temple University), who doubles on piano and Fender Rhodes. Singer Fred Johnson, a Bay area jazz stalwart who came on the scene about the same time as Ross, will make a guest appearance, performing the tunes he sings on Giraffe, plus a few other favorites. The Side Door, with its nightclubstyle seating, intimate vibe and excellent sound quality, provides the ideal setting for what is sure to be a stellar evening of jazz.—Eric Snider

FRI 10

Christopher Cross Yacht-rock would not be the same without songs like “Ride Like the Wind” (1979), and the man responsible for it is back in Clearwater to play the cut, along with the damn good guitar work that keeps him on the road seemingly nonstop. (Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater) Chris Young w/Nate Smith Once he’s done hosting the Country Music Awards on Wednesday night, 38-year-old Mr. “Famous Friends” shoots straight over to Florida for the second time this year. Expect Young to run through a career-so-far retrospective, minus—ala Taylor Swift—his self-titled debut

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C Jason Bonham’s Led Zeppelin Evening The son of late Led Zeppelin drummer John Bonham might be the most in-demand drummer in classic rock. Jason—who was literally just in Clearwater drumming for Sammy Hagar and the Circle last weekend—used to play for Heart, and has been leading (from the back, anyway) his own, four-piece Zeppelin tribute for close to 15 years now, with John Paul Jones-endorsed singer James Dylan at the helm. Led Zeppelin Evening has opened for the likes of Foreigner and Peter Frampton. Knowing how seldom Jones and Jimmy Page perform, this show at the Hard Rock is probably the closest we’re going to get to a wholly Zeppelin centered gig these days, assuming Robert Plant stays country for the rest of his days. (Hard Rock Event Center at Seminole Hard Rock Hotel & Casino, Tampa)

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JudyAnne Jackson album. Up-and-coming country singer-songwriter Nate Smith, who recently released a cover of Snow Patrol’s “Chasing Cars” opens. (The Sound, Clearwater) Essential Machine w/Village Elder/A Rainy Night In According to drummer Karen Dietrich, the Pittsburgh-based indie rock family trio calls Tampa a “hometown of sorts.” Dietrich and her husband RJ—who both moved to Tampa around the turn of the century—met while working at a Capitol One call center, and ended up bonding over Third Eye Blind’s at-thetime recently released self-titled album. Their son Robert was born in 2001, but a few years after RJ went to work for Oldsmar’s Apple Rehearsal Studios and Karen taught English at Tampa’s Gaither High School, the little family moved up north around 2007. “One benefit of having a kid so young is that now we can play in a band together,” she told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. “Of course we’ve come back to visit over the years but this is our first time playing a show in Tampa.” The family band’s latest EP Exponential Crisis is built around experiences during COVID-19 lockdowns, as well as “ambition and the darker side of what it means to be human.” (Music Hall at New World Brewery, Tampa) Everglow Following a hiatus that lasted for nearly two years, the all-female, K-pop sextet dropped a 10-minute, three-track “album” All My Girls (stylized in all-caps), which crosses both English and Korean lyrics into instrumentation that resembles 2010s contemporary pop. The show is part of the girls’ first full U.S. tour, after a five-date run in March got axed after two shows due to… well, do I really need to say why? (Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg) C JudyAnne Jackson Tampa songwriter JudyAnne Jackson has grown up before her hometown’s eyes, and she heads to a

venue that wants to usher in Ybor City’s next chapter for this record release show. The 15-year-old’s new EP, Dear Me, is a tender reflection on life, driven by hooks, melodies and steel guitar that is ready to dominate radio (“Empty Party Of Me”), keep fans company on lonely nights (the title track), and push Jackson into the next phase of her evolution (“Eneme”). This show is also an instrument dropoff for local nonprofit Gasparilla Music Foundation, which will give a three-day Gasparilla Music Festival pass to anyone who donates a gently-used brass or woodwind instrument at the door. (1920, Ybor City) C Rise Up Concert Series: Quinn XCII Last weekend, the new Rise Up Concert Series welcomed 4,000 fans to the green space near Spa Beach and the St. Pete Pier for a kickoff concert featuring The Revivalists. The shows, which run through Jan. 20, continue this weekend with two nights of concerts featuring “Stay Next To Me” pop songwriter Quinn XCII (playing Friday along with Michigan DJ Ayokay who actually went to school with Quinn XCII). The party continues on Saturday, with a reggae-rock bill topped by Iration. (St. Pete Pier, St. Petersburg) Rmblr w/Vicious Dreams/Kick Veronica/ Razor and the Boogiemen Thanks to local breweries and bars, St. Pete’s punk promoters keep booking shows despite a scarcity of traditional rock clubs. The trend continues with this visit from Atlanta-andBaltimore-based quintet, Rmblr, purveyors of straight-ahead working-class rock and roll for fans of both Sheer Mag and The Nude Party. Orlando power-pop outfit Vicious Dreams is on the bill, too, along with local favorites Kick Veronica plus Razor and the Boogiemen. (St. Pete Brewing Co., St. Petersburg)

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continued from page 45 Russell Dickerson w/Restless Road The Belmont University graduate—who’s making a big deal about making sure his self-titled third album is as revealing of a creation as possible—recently became a father for the second time, and he literally rolled up to the hospital in his tour bus. Against all odds, the 36-year-old’s arrival to his wife’s bedside came hours after a Kansas City gig, which was scheduled to be his last one for a minute. After spending some time in Florida this weekend with country trio Restless Road, the 36-year-old heads home for the holidays and doesn’t come back to the stage until February. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg)

Mindwash

SAT 11

C Blackberry Smoke The Atlanta-based Americana outfit—which helped usher in the return of live music to Tampa Bay in 2021—already has a brand-new era lined up for a spring world tour. Paul Jackson and company, often cited as a more modern source for fans of Tom Petty and Jason Isbell, have a 10-track album (Be Right Here) in the pipeline, and so far, the record’s two singles indeed resemble material that Petty would have worked on during his Last DJ days in the early-2000s. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg) The Fixx We didn’t think it’d be long before the British new-wave outfit came back to town. Following an extensive tour last fall heavily supporting its first album in a decade Every Five Seconds, it’s looking like Cy Curnin and friends are looking to once again lean towards the nostalgia aspect of their 41-yearold catalog, with a few new cuts still sprinkled in anyway. (Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater) C Johnny Dynamite and the Bloodsuckers w/Bedside Kites/Fessi K John Morisi is a lot like the rest of us in that he’s not afraid to express his love for a wide swatch of music. As Under the Radar points out, the New York songwriter touring right now with his band Johnny Dynamite and The Bloodsuckers is influenced by everything from Pet Shop Boys to Max Martin. On The Tale of Tommy Gunn, released in September via Born Loser Records, Morisi spins the tale of a Big Apple underdog who thinks he’s supposed to make it in Nashville, Tennessee. Over programmed beats, jangly guitars, citypop piano, the saga unfolds, and it’ll be cool to see how the record plays out at this free show inside St. Pete’s swankiest dive bar. (The Bends, St. Petersburg) C Mindwash album release w/Hovercar/ Bad Bad Things “Shot At Me,” the first song on Mindwash’s new album Think Trash, feels like the opening scene of a dusty action movie where the protagonist is rolling down a lonesome highway in a T-top Chevrolet. The rest of the nine-track outing doesn’t ease up on the gas and is loaded with tight-jean-wearing rock and roll guitar all driven by the soaring vocal of frontman Laith Abel who frequently sounds like The Mars Volta's Cedric Bixler-Zavala a la “Inertiatic ESP." This album release gig is probably the best local show happening this weekend and gets an added boost from bombastic rock duo Hovercar and the irresistible power-pop of Bad, Bad Things. (Crowbar, Ybor City)

DAVE DECKER

River Tower Festival: Roxx Revolt & The Velvets w/Space Krate/Juanjamon/ Synergy In A Cup/Rebekah Pulley & the Reluctant Prophets/Lauris Vidal/Tribal Style/DJ Gabe Echazabal/more Sulphur Springs’ more than 200-foot water tower is a local landmark (read more on p. 13), and for this day-long celebration of it, a host of Tampa bands are pitching in to raise money for its continued care. Always-smiling oneman Americana-rock band Lauris Vidal makes an appearance along with a matriarch of the Bay area songwriter scene (Rebekah Pulley), Tribal Style (a totem among reggae bands), plus party-starting Synergy In A Cup and bombastic rock and roll outfit Roxx Revolt & the Velvets. CL’s senior music contributor Gabe Echazabal mans the ones and twos in between sets. (River Tower Park, Tampa) C Rock Eupora w/Mak/Perception Power-pop in the name in the vein of OK Go and The Posies is the order of the day for Nashville songwriter Clayton Waller who brings his band, Rock Eupora, and its latest album, 2022’s Pick at the Scab, to New World for a show that features opening sets from equally punchy local indie-pop band Mak and rapper Perception. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa) C Walmart presents ‘Heroes & Headliners’: Chris Stapleton w/Imagine Dragons/H.E.R./Rob Gronkowski and Camille Kostek If you missed out on Chris Stapleton’s slot at George Strait’s Raymond James Stadium gig—or Imagine Dragons’ headlining slot at the final Innings Fest—earlier this year, the ol’ Gary has you covered. Walmart is hosting a first-of-its-kind megashow honoring veterans and active military

46 | NOVEMBER 09-15, 2023 | cltampabay.com

personnel, with Rob Gronkowski and girlfriend Camille Kostek as special guest hosts. This show is long sold-out, but up to four free tickets—minus good ol’ Live Nation’s ticket fees, one of life’s few guarantees—were originally available for military families. (MidFlorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa)

SUN 12

8th Annual 99.5 QYK Guitar Pull: Scotty McCreery/Tigirlily Gold/George Birge/ Brian Kelley/Brett Young Even if you’re not familiar with the 2023 Guitar Pull lineup of up-and-coming country kids (an “American Idol” winner, a sister duo, and half of Waterloo Revival), it wouldn’t kill you to go check it out. Not only will Mr. “In Case You Didn’t Know” himself, Brett Young, and Brian Kelley of Florida Georgia Line be in attendance, but not too long ago, some kid named Morgan Wallen played the ‘Pull. Wallen headlines a gig at Raymond James Stadium next summer, so if George Birge makes it big in a few years, you’ll have a hell of a concert story to tell your kids. (Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg) C Joey McIntyre Before spending his summer with his boyband brethren, the youngest New Kid on the Block—who returns to Tampa with the boys in July—is playing it solo. The 50-year-old Broadway veteran (“Wicked,” “Tick, Tick…BOOM!”) does a two-night stand that showcases classic rock covers, a handful of New Kids jams, and even some of his own solo cuts. (Floridian Social, St. Petersburg)

C LaRue Nickelson w/Chad Stivers If there was a Bay area dean of jazz guitar, it might be Nickelson. The 49-year-old (who is actually a 23-year instructor at University of South Florida’s School of Music) is modest about his composing ability, grasp of harmonic theory, and the unique voice of the instrument when it’s in his hands, but he (thankfully) regularly gigs and makes an appearance at this intimate Seminole Heights shop for a BYOB show. (The Far Forest, Tampa) Matthew Fowler w/Kristopher James/ Wyatt Norton Fans of Damien Rice, Gregory Alan Isakov and David Ramirez will be drawn to Fowler, a songwriter bornand-raised in Florida and still on the road supporting The Grief We Gave Our Mother, his 2021 collection of downtrodden, cutting, and stripped-back guitar folk. The Bay area should be somewhat familiar with Fowler (back in 2019, he played the Tampa Bay Listening Room Festival, and opened for High Divers in Ybor City), but this no-cover affair is his first headlining gig as far as we know. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa)

TUE 14

Gallery Grooves: John Frinzi Radio St. Pete has carved out its own special place on the dial (96.7-FM in Pinellas, otherwise, go to radiostpete.com), and this week it does another live broadcast so you can interface with the station IRL. Lakeland-based songwriter John Frinzi has collaborated with Coral

continued on page 49

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Phoenix Reefers like original Jimmy Buffett guitarist Roger Bartlett and even caught the attention of Coral Reefer Doyle Grisham who worked with Frinzi on his solo debut. (Morean Arts Center, St. Petersburg) Leon Rosen w/Ernestine Black If you’re on the fence about sending your kid to grow up in an artist compound, have a look at your future when San Francisco songwriter Leon Rosen sits behind the piano and plays a bluesy, smoky brand of pop-rock. Rosen’s band on this run includes players who’ve traveled the country with Macklemore and David Byrne (Carter Yasutake), Peel Dream Magazine (Jo-Anne Hyun) and even appeared on “American Idol” (Lee Jean Jr.). (Music Hall at New World Brewery, Tampa)

WED 15

C Bush w/Bad Wolves/Eva Under Fire Considering how large and outdoorsy the venues played by the English grunge outfit have been during recent local gigs, it’s weird how Ruth Eckerd's more intimate setting—and air conditioning—hasn’t caused Bush’s Clearwater debut to sell out in a matter of days. This show promotes the band’s new greatest hits compilation (Loaded: The Greatest Hits 1994-2023), which features “Nowhere To Go But Everywhere” a new single described by some as a transition from grunge to nu-metal. (Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater) C Phoenix Pusha T and Phoenix was not a collab anyone had on their 2023 bingo card, but the rapper and Grammy-winning French

indie-rock band recently came together for a new version of “All Eyes On Me,” originally from the latter’s 2022 album, Alpha Zulu. Phoenix is in town supporting the effort—and King Push doesn’t have tour dates, so there’s always a chance. (Jannus Live, St Petersburg)

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THU 16

C Tampa Jazz Club: Dave Stryker Nebraska-born jazz guitarist Dave Stryker learned how to play at the age of 10, listening to Cream and Johnny Winter before graduating to Freddie, King, Wes Montgomery and Miles Davis. His distinct style has earned the 66-yearold five albums that went no. 1 on the JazzWeek radio chart, and sideman jobs with Jack McDuff and others. Stryker is joined by the faculty jazz ensemble from the University of South Florida’s School of music for this gig, just up the road from the school, in New Tampa. (New Tampa Performing Arts Center, Tampa) Mariachi Sol De Mexico® de Jóse Hernàndez America’s leading mariachi band is led by fifth-generation mariachi player José Hernández who fuses pop with traditional sounds. (Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater) Unwed Sailor w/Radaghast/Choking on the Revelry Over the course of 25 years, instrumental-rock outfit Unwed Sailor has added layers and layers to its charming indierock aesthetic. But for its latest outing, Mute The Charm, the Oklahoma-based outfit (FFO Seam, Joy Division, The Sundays) stripped the sound back a bit, opting to put the guitars, bass and drums front and center. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa)

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ANGELINA CASTILLO

From Sallisaw to Safety Harbor, Americana diehards fall down in the wake of John Moreland’s painfully-introspective lyricism and deceptively-genius approach to songwriting. The 38-year-old Oklahoma-native just announced a new round of 2024 tour dates, which kick off this spring in Tampa Bay. Tickets to see John Moreland play Safety Harbor Arts & Music Center on Thursday, Feb. 1 go on sale Friday, Nov. 3 and start at $30. Other Florida cities on Moreland’s tour include Ponte Vedra (Feb. 2) and Gainesville

(Feb. 3). Chris Staples—a gem of a Sunshine State songwriter who just played a sold-out St. Pete show—opens. Moreland—who last played SHAMC in 2018—is on the road in support of his 2022 album, Birds in the Ceiling, where he challenged his fans by going in a more electronic, experimental direction for a record that still features a lot of the darkness from past outings, just in a different overcoat. See Josh Bradley’s weekly roundup of new concert announcements below.—Ray Roa

Pouya w/Fat Nick/Terror Reid/ Kxllswxtch/more Sunday, Nov. 19. 7 p.m. $25.50. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

Descendents w/Circle Jerks/The Adolescents Friday, March 29. 7 p.m. $36.50. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

Black(Out) Friday: Gauchais w/Hoss/ Play Dead/Bad Future/Sandman Sleeps/ more Friday, Nov. 24. 5:30 p.m. $12. Orpheum, Tampa

The Guess Who Friday, April 5. 8 p.m. $42.50 & up. Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg

Agnostic Front w/Murphy’s Law/Grade 2 Wednesday, Dec. 13. 7 p.m. $25. Crowbar, Ybor City Mickey Avalon Friday, Jan. 26. 7 p.m. $20 & up. Floridian Social, St. Petersburg Go Ahead And Die w/Bodybox Saturday, Feb. 3. 6 p.m. $20. Orpheum, Tampa Gladys Knight Wednesday, Feb. 14. 8 p.m. $53 & up. Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg Daddy's Beemer w/ Homemade Haircuts Saturday, Feb. 24. 8 p.m. $12. Hooch and Hive, Tampa Nickel Creek Saturday, Feb. 24. 8 p.m. $38.75 & up. Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater Ekkstacy w/Alexsucks Sunday, March 3. 7 p.m. $20. Crowbar, Ybor City Taylor Dayne w/Tiffany Saturday, March 23. 8 p.m. $45 & up. Bilheimer Capitol Theatre, Clearwater

Josiah and the Bonnevilles w/Mon Rovîa/Abby Cates/Sydney Rose Saturday, April 6. 8 p.m. $15. Crowbar, Ybor City 98Rockfest: Staind w/Seether/Asking Alexandria/Dayseeker/Ayron Jones/ Austin Meade/moreFriday, April 19. 5:50 p.m. $35 & up. Amalie Arena, Tampa Gloria Trevi w/MAR Saturday, April 20. 8 p.m. $35.75 & up. Amalie Arena, Tampa Andrés Cepeda Friday, April 26. 7:30 p.m. $49.50 & up. Morsani Hall at Straz Center, Tampa Jacob Collier w/Kimbra Monday, May 6. 7 p.m. $43 & up. Mahaffey Theater, St. Petersburg Madison Beer w/Upsahl Wednesday, May 22. 6:30 p.m. $40 & up. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg Hauser Saturday, June 1. 8 p.m. $53.25 & up. Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater

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52 | NOVEMBER 09-15, 2023 | cltampabay.com

Not glue By Dan Savage

I wanted to record this for your podcast but I’m literally too ashamed to say it out loud. I was in a relationship for more than 20 years with a guy who abused me sexually, emotionally, physically, psychologically, and financially. I grew up in a pretty unstable (read: abusive and neglectful) household and I’m proud that I finally managed to leave this man. I get that there’s this thing where people with life experiences like mine tend to blame ourselves and think everything is our own fault. But there’s this one thing that really makes me think I’m terrible. This one time, when we were in bed and had both been drinking, I kept trying to kiss him. He would often ignore me and refuse to let me touch him for days and I would wind up making every effort to please him. This particular night I kissed him and then started to give him a blowjob and we ended up having sex. He later called this rape. He didn’t call it rape when he pinned me down and told me to stay still, which was how we “had sex” most often toward the end, and sex only happened when he wanted it. I was never able to initiate, not even a kiss. I’m worried that I’m just as bad as him. Before I was with him, I was hot on consent in all things, especially as I enjoy some light BDSM. I think communicating about sex is sexy. I’ve had good open and honest and raw communication with every one of my partners after him, Dan, but I feel like I’m lying to my new partners about being a decent person. Can you please let me know what you think. —Feeling Remorse About Upsetting Denunciation

rape your shitty ex. You initiated sex with a long-term partner in an extremely dysfunctional relationship. While it wouldn’t be OK to climb on top of a stranger on a subway and start kissing him or blowing him, most of us don’t require our long-term partners to secure our verbal consent before they attempt to initiate sex. What we want from our partners—what we have a right to expect from our partners—is the emotional intelligence to kindasorta know when we might be in the mood or close enough that a kiss might get us there. And if it turns out we’re not in the mood and that kiss isn’t going to get us there, a good partner executes a quick, non-grudging, non-whiny pivot to something else we enjoy as a couple, e.g., cuddling, ice cream, shit-talking our friends, “Zelda,” or all of the above. If you had fucked someone for the first time or the 50th time, FRAUD, and you weren’t sure whether he wanted to have sex and you didn’t care whether he wanted to have sex and you behaved in such a way that he was afraid to say no… then his silent acquiescence would not constitute meaningful consent and you should feel bad. But what happened on the night you described existed in a context of an established relationship— a relationship that included a lot of shitty “sex” initiated by your ex without regard for your boundaries or your pleasure— and your ex had no reason to fear you and could’ve said no at any time. Instead, your emotionally abusive ex decided to weaponize some shitty, drunken, non-rapey sex to make you feel like you treated him just as badly as he treated you; he was projecting and suggesting a false equivalency. Again, if everything went down the way you described it, you didn’t rape your ex… but it sure sounds like he raped you. And since he’s not rubber, FRAUD, and you’re not glue, nothing that bounces off him has to stick to you. But if you don’t wanna worry about ambiguity with future partners, FRAUD, tell them that before light physical intimacy (kissing, cuddling, shit-talking friends) progresses to actual sexual intercourse (sucking, eating, fucking), one of you needs to say, “Hey, wanna fuck?,” and the other has to say “Fuck yes!”

SAVAGE LOVE

Consider the source—that was my first reaction to your question, FRAUD, but I wanted to get a quick gut-check from someone with relevant expertise. “There are so many additional questions I’d have for this person to understand whether what happened would indeed qualify as ‘rape’ in a legal sense,” said Rena Martine, a women’s intimacy coach who happens to be a former sex crimes prosecutor. “But I’m not sure that’s what FRAUD is asking. Ultimately, ‘rape’ is a term her former partner used to describe a single instance where they were both drunk and where FRAUD initiated sex. He didn’t use the term ‘rape’ to describe the decades of abuse he subjected FRAUD to, abuse that involved forceful sex. In that sense, his definition of ‘rape’ isn’t a reliable benchmark.” My feelings exactly. If everything went down as you described— the “if” lurks at the heart of every question that appears in an advice column (we only get one person’s version of events)—then you didn’t

Final word goes to Martine: “A cornerstone of shame is a feeling of otherness—this terrible thing happened to me, and no one else can possibly understand what this feels like—but the sad reality is that intimate partner sexual violence is a common occurrence. Almost half of female (46.7%) and male (44.9%) victims of rape in the United States were raped by an acquaintance. Of these, 45.4% of female rape victims and 29% of male rape victims were raped by an intimate partner.” @_rena.martine_ is on Instagram and renamartine.com. Young, gay, gym member. A few years ago, I was alone in the sauna when this older guy asked if he could massage my feet. I’m pretty vanilla but he didn’t seem like a menacing pervert. So, I took your advice (been a reader forever) and used my words: I told him he could massage my feet on the condition that he didn’t do anything else. He respected my boundary, so I let him do it again and it turned into a regular thing. We would nod to each other in the weight room and follow me into the sauna when I was done working out. We started to make stupid small talk to relieve the tension (sexual for him, regular for

me) and it turned out he worked in the field I wanted to go into. (I can’t be more specific than that, sorry.) He offered to look at my resume and then wrote me a letter of recommendation that led to a job offer. Here our story takes a sad turn: This old man died and I’m not sure of how to process what I’m feeling. We emailed a little, but we never met outside of the gym. Am I allowed to feel grief? And should I go

to his funeral? It’s not a private ceremony but how would I explain my presence to his family? I didn’t know this man socially and I feel like saying, “I knew your husband and father from the gym,” might raise questions or suspicions. He was bisexual but not out and I don’t want to cause his family any additional pain. —Getting Your Meaning I’m guessing you haven’t buried anyone— maybe a grandparent or two, but not a parent or a partner. So, here’s how condolences work at funerals: if someone wants to express their condolences to the immediate family of the deceased, that person approaches the family before or after the service. If that person is unknown to the family, that person can mention (but isn’t obligated to mention) how they knew the deceased before expressing their sympathy (“I’m so sorry for your loss”). It’s meant to be a brief interaction you want to acknowledge their grief, not burden them with your own—and it’s an entirely optional one. If you don’t want to say something to the family, or don’t know what to say, you don’t have to approach the family. There were a lot of people at my mother’s funeral that I didn’t know, GYM, and some of those strangers—strangers to me, not my mother—approached me and my siblings and stepfather and my mother’s siblings to express their condolences and some did not. But we were grateful to each and every person who came to my mom’s funeral, whether they approached us or not, and we didn’t run around asking strangers how they knew my mother. (For all I know, GYM, there were a dozen people at my mother’s funeral whose feet she rubbed in the sauna at the gym we didn’t know she belonged to.) So, go to the funeral, dress appropriately, sit at the back, don’t be surprised if you recognize a few other faces from the gym (I’m guessing the deceased didn’t have a monogamous relationship with your feet), and don’t feel obligated to approach the family. If someone sitting in your pew asks how you knew the deceased, feel free to tell (part of) the truth: “We went to the same gym, he gave me some professional advice, and I really appreciated his friendship.” And… I’m sorry for your loss, GYM. Your share of the grief is tiny compared to that of this man’s wife and kids, but he touched your life— not just your feet—and your grief is real, meaningful, and touching. Send your question to mailbox@savage.love. Podcasts, columns and more at Savage.Love.

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