Creative Loafing Tampa — December 29, 2022

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SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES Anthony Carbone, Scott Zepeda

MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND EVENTS DIRECTOR

SeaWorld in February, animal rights claiming the practice of keeping wild dangerous. But even though public many don’t see a parallel between the kind and the practice of displaying animals asking for too much? Or is it time for a “entertainment” animals?

at SeaWorld in February, animal rights claiming the practice of keeping wild and dangerous. But even though public widespread, many don’t see a parallel between the kind Vick and the practice of displaying animals activists asking for too much? Or is it time for a “entertainment” animals?

Alexis Quinn Chamberlain

MARKETING, PROMOTIONS AND EVENTS COORDINATOR Lauren Caplinger

EUCLID MEDIA GROUP

CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER Andrew Zelman

Music: Tampa Bay Blues Fest 40

Music Week ...................................................42

CHIEF OPERATING OFFICERS Chris Keating, Michael Wagner

EXECUTIVE EDITOR Sarah Fenske

Music: Tampa Bay Blues Fest 40

Music Week ...................................................42

Concert review: Artic Monkeys 42 The List ..........................................................46

VP OF DIGITAL SERVICES Stacy Volhein

Concert review: Artic Monkeys 42 The List ..........................................................46

Movie reviews 63

Movie reviews 63 Free Will Astrology.........................................64 Puzzler ...........................................................66

Free Will Astrology.........................................64

Savage Love 69

Puzzler ...........................................................66

Savage Love 69

tampa.creativeloafing.com/cltv

tampa.creativeloafing.com/cltv

How was your Date? cltampa.com/movies cltampa.com/PartyPics

How was your Date? cltampa.com/movies on cltampa.com/PartyPics

Ybor Festival of the Moving Image cltampa.com/arts

Ybor Festival of the Moving Image cltampa.com/arts

twitter.com/cl_tampa facebook.com/cltampa editors Connects,

twitter.com/cl_tampa facebook.com/cltampa editors Connects,

new Kress Collective, p. 31.

DARYL BOWEN

Black is beautiful

By Ray Roa

In last year’s Spring Arts Preview, St. Petersburg artist Nick Davis was surprised that the community had so fully embraced his artwork. He was the subject of profiles on WEDU. Kids watching the “Read About It” program listened as he spread his message that “Black is beautiful,” and he was named “Best Emerging Digital Artist” in the 2021 Best of the Bay awards. His work was not only made into NFTs but prominently on display is places like The Fairgrounds in St. Pete and for the public to enjoy on the Tampa Riverwalk.

“To be accepted now is a shock,” Davis told CL. “I think a lot of people see something in me that I don’t really see in myself. It’s good to have my artwork accepted.”

Now, the Bay area art community is undoubtedly in shock and forced to accept that Davis took his last breath on Dec. 16 at just 31 years old. Davis’ passing comes almost six years after he was diagnosed with epilepsy, a heartbreaking development in his life.

His family wrote that it was an epileptic seizure that killed Davis.

“He literally lived every day as it if were his last,” a GoFundMe page says. Money raised will help the family with funeral expenses and the work to preserve Davis’ legacy. “As usual, his beautiful wife Tiffany was by his side at the very

end. She would be the last face he saw when he took his final breath. A peaceful farewell.”

The illness forced Davis to quit his day job, but pushed him to the iPad, a gift from Tiffany, who saw his need for the outlet.

“Nick vowed to never let the disease define him,” Davis’ family added. “...he poured his heart and soul into his art. Nick spent countless hours per day perfecting his craft. Wherever he went, his iPad and pencil remained by his side. He was always prepared when inspiration struck.”

A recent work, “Underwater Blues,” is accompanied by a Nina Simone quote that says, “To me, we are the most beautiful creatures in the whole world. Black people. And I mean that in every sense.”

Davis started to move into animation in his latest phase, and his last social media message, posted a day before his passing, quoted the late “Golden Girls” star Betty White: “It’s your outlook on life that counts. If you take yourself lightly and don’t take yourself too seriously, pretty soon you can find the humor in our everyday lives. And sometimes it can be a lifesaver.”

Davis’ story, and the way he so beautifully expressed the complicated emotions he felt inside, certainly lifted the Bay area up, and his memory won’t soon be forgotten.

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REST IN POWER: Late St. Petersburg artist Nick Davis.

“Nick vowed to never let the disease define him.”

To close out the year, help preserve the legacy of a beloved St. Pete artist.

POLITICS

ISSUES OPINION

Sssunshine ssstate

Snakes eating each other, plus more of CL’s most read news stories of 2022.

By Ray Roa

Florida may be the most interesting state to run an alt-weekly because the headlines more or less write themselves. There was a lot of wildlife among the most-trafficked stories in our news vertical, but cops trying to evict people, Tampa’s disgraced police chief and our asshole governor (see more on p. 21) made the cut, too.

Florida researchers attached transmitters to Burmese pythons, and now they’re showing up inside native snakes It appears some native snakes are snacking on arguably Florida’s worst invasive species. In August, Zoo Miami shared the Florida fauna win to their social media, showing an X-ray image of a cottonmouth, or water moccasin, with a visible Burmese python vertebrae and radio transmitter inside. Invasive Burmese pythons have been decimating Florida wildlife for nearly 40 years, which has resulted in decreased mammal populations and increased competition for food with natives like alligators and endangered Florida panthers.

Circle K gas stations in Florida will start selling weed, legitimately As Bill and Ted once famously said, “Strange things are afoot at the Circle K.” The global chain of gas stations and convenience stores recently signed an exclusive deal with Chicago-based Green Thumb Industries Inc., one of the largest cannabis producers in the U.S, to sell marijuana from 10 of the company’s locations in Florida starting in 2023. According to a statement from Green Thumb, the company will lease space from Circle K locations for what is called “RISE Express” stores, which will have a separate entrance and will offer patients “a selection of branded cannabis products including RYTHM premium flower, Dogwalkers pre-rolls, incredibles gummies and & Shine vapes.”

The mystery of Tampa’s hairless creature has been solved A photo of a mysterious, and truly miserable looking animal in Tampa went viral on social media in March and despite what many commenters have speculated, it’s not a hairless bear, or a chupacabra. The photo was posted to Twitter on Monday by user Blizzjuuheardd, along with the comment “Boy what the fuck is this shit. I’m getting out of tampa bro.” The post was shared nearly 20,000 times, with commenters saying it could

be anything from the dog from “Coco” to a Florida Skunk Ape.

Miami New Times reached to Zoo Miami spokesperson Ron Magill, who confirmed that the animal is most likely a coyote with a bad case of mange, which can result in hair loss, scabbing and terrible itching for canines. Magill assured the publication that the animal poses no risk for humans, but small pets and children should avoid coyotes while outdoors.

deputy was antagonizing the tenants and the activists, telling them the eviction was going to happen one way or another, and kept insisting that the eviction was not illegal, speaking over people when they were trying to correct the deputy on the law. All of the officers eventually backed off, after a Pinellas County judge told them that the tenants do have 90 days to move, under the law. Not all heroes wear capes.

Video shows alligator named ‘Big Head Fred’ eating smaller gator at Florida spring Big Head Fred is hungry, and meat is back on the menu, boys. A summertime video posted to Facebook by Kayla Jane of Kayla Jane’s Crystal Kayaks shows a large alligator in Florida’s Silver Springs savagely enjoying a

YEAR IN REVIEW

Pinellas County Sheriff deputies tried to illegally evict renters in St. Pete In June, Pinellas County Sheriff deputies tried to evict three renters from their house in the Historic Kenwood neighborhood. But as the St. Petersburg Tenant’s Union pointed out to the deputies in a heated interaction caught on video, the officers were attempting to carry out an illegal eviction. In the video, the officer insisted it was a final eviction, but was completely wrong about the situation. In the video one PCSO

much smaller gator for lunch. “Big Head Fred is back at it again,” says the video’s caption, as the cannibal gator can be seen whipping around the motionless gator.

‘This is ridiculous’: Video shows Florida Gov. DeSantis yelling at Tampa teenagers for wearing masks at his press conference Like an old man stumbling into a Hot Topic, Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis decided to yell at a group of teens for wearing something he doesn’t like. DeSantis was at the University of South Florida

in March to announce funding for a $20 million cyber security program, when he noticed some of the students that would be standing behind him were wearing protective face coverings. In a candid video captured by WFLA, a frustrated DeSantis can be seen barking at the students, who reporter Evan Donovan says were actually students from Tampa’s Middleton High School.

“You do not have to wear those masks,” said DeSantis. “Please take them off. Honestly, it’s not doing anything. We’ve gotta stop with this Covid theater. So if you wanna wear it, fine, but this is ridiculous.” In the video, some of the students then removed their face masks, while a few kept them on through the press conference. Interestingly, the same scene showing DeSantis yelling at kids was muted in the official video for the conference posted on DeSantis’ Twitter account.

Video shows Tampa Bay man pulling an AR-style gun on Black landscapers On July 7, a Clearwater man with a lengthy criminal history pulled what looks like an AR-style gun on a Black father and daughter who were landscaping a lawn across the street from him, according to a recent video shared across social media. In the video, David H. Berry of Fat Finger Construction can be seen holding the rifle and yelling at Jeremy Lee, while his daughter Carrie Lee films the interaction. In the past, Berry has been charged with at least three felonies, including battery and burglary, according to Pinellas County Court records. All were pled down to misdemeanors.

Memes shared within Tampa Police Department show staff celebrating chief’s resignation over golf cart scandal Tampa Police Chief Mary O’Connor resigned after body cam footage showed her flashing her badge to get out of a golf cart traffic violation, and while some at TPD may be upset and disappointed with her sudden departure, others within the city’s largest department celebrated by sharing memes. The memes, which were first obtained by CL, were shared within TPD chats and cover everything from jokes about O’Connor’s golf cart scandal to suggestions for her replacement. While current and former TPD employees have anonymously told CL that O’Connor had a turbulent relationship with her rank and file staff, Castor maintains that O’Connor was well-liked, and actually “improved morale.”

Once again, Siesta Key and other Sarasota County beaches are closed for swimming, due to high levels of poop bacteria Shitty.

HISSCUSE ME? Native snakes are now pitching in for the fight against invasive pythons.

IGOR DMITRIEV/ADOBE

Castor’s disasters

Tampa Mayor Jane Castor’s 10 dumbest moments of 2022.

By Colin Wolf

Jane Castor filed for re-election earlier this month, a move that will likely solidify her position as the next mayor of Tampa since no other candidate has emerged with even a slight shot at the job. So, it’s kind of remarkable that a mayor, who is all but guaranteed to be re-elected, could still, somehow, still have a year this jam-packed with scandals, controversy and all-round general stupidity. Without a doubt 2022 was a tough one for Castor. From losing her handpicked police chief over a golf cart scandal, to losing her shirt over Bitcoin and then shilling for tech bros, here are Jane Castor’s 10 dumbest moments of 2022.

After a DOJ investigation and the displacement of hundreds of mostly Black residents, Castor blamed the media and staunchly defended her “Crime Free Housing” program Castor backed up her accusation that the media was wrong by citing incomplete data gathering conducted by her administration which only examined a portion of the time “crime free” existed. The city’s assessment is missing the first three years of data, when the program was most active. There were also a number of other problems with the data.

“The majority of notices sent to landlords were for someone living with the registered tenant, so the names would not match in court documents,” the Times published in defense of its reporting last year. “And in many cases, families moved out when they received a notice to vacate or were told to do so by the landlord — before the matter went to court.”

Documents obtained by Creative Loafing Tampa Bay support the Times’ statement, with one note from TPD reading, “left on her own—no eviction.” Another TPD document notes that a landlord chose non-renewal of the tenant’s lease, rather than eviction.

The city’s data gathering did not address these types of situations. Under “crime free,” if a person was even arrested for a crime, the whole household could be evicted, including the elderly, children and other family members. According to the Times investigation, TPD officers recorded more than 300 tenants as “evicted” on a database which tracked the activity of the program Castor waited over five months to admit she approved the Hanna Avenue project, which somehow ballooned from $10 million to $108 million without a public bid In April, Castor said that she approved Tampa’s ‘City Center at Hanna Avenue’ after more than five months of councilmen and local leaders asking who was responsible for the controversial project. Her admission came after multiple city council meetings where construction experts

and city council members repeatedly asked who was responsible for green lighting the project, which jumped from $10 million to $108 million without a public bid, among other glaring problems—including initial lack of participation from unions and the Black community.

Not only did Castor avoid answering the community’s important questions, her city attorneys pushed back on the idea of appearing before council to discuss the project back in March. Eventually, though, staff did discuss the project. At a city council meeting on March 31, Castor’s Chief of Staff John Bennett said, “The administration brought this together collectively and made the best decision we could at the time.”

same matter. Documents show that Tampa’s City Attorney used her personal cellphone to communicate with an attorney, who just months prior sued former councilman John Dingfelder, in part, for using a personal email.

Despite telling City Council members to not use their personal phones for city business, City Attorney Gina Grimes used hers to stay in regular contact with attorney Ethan Loeb during hours of phone calls between December and March of this year, according to documents obtained by CL.

YEAR IN REVIEW

Last October, Loeb filed a public records lawsuit against Dingfelder, which ultimately led to his resignation as part of the lawsuit settlement. Texts to her personal cell show Grimes indicating when she was available to talk with Loeb. And some of the data from conversations about city business, which is required to be retained by the city and provided under public records law, were not available in the city’s records.

Castor conveniently claimed “rent control would kill development,” while more than half of her re-election PAC is lined with developer cash At a March 9 press conference, Tampa Mayor Jane Castor told reporters that rent stabilization and rent control aren’t viable solutions to the housing crisis because the measures would “kill development.” What Castor didn’t mention is that over half of her “Tampa Strong” political action committee (PAC) is funded by sources tied to development.

Records from the Florida Division of Elections website showed that $539,950 out of $1,039,180.93—roughly 52%—came from donors who fit into categories aligned with industries associated with development. These categories include: real estate and construction firms, private equity firms, real estate attorneys, engineering firms and developers.

After Castor ripped former councilman John Dingfelder for using a private

Grimes, who worked for a real estate and land use firm from 2004-2019 before joining

Real estate firms gave the most out of all of these categories, coming in at $323,350. Contributions from construction groups came in second at $128,600. Tampa Bay Lightning owner and local mega-developer Jeff Vinik gave $194,000, or 18.6% of the funding for the PAC.

Castor defended embattled HART CEO, and claimed she didn’t know anything about the toxic work environment claims, despite months of reporting from multiple outlets Castor said she hadn’t heard evidence of a hostile work environment, despite former employees saying it on the record, and a leaked resignation letter from Le Grand’s fourth communications director that called Le Grand a “dictator and a tyrant.”

Castor also said that she hasn’t seen evidence of double-dipping by a top executive at HART, despite the Tampa Bay Times reporting on it last month. What Castor said at the Dec. 5 meeting echoes what she said at a meeting the week before, where she advised the board to not suspend or remove Le Grand. Castor used herself as an example, saying, “I’ve been involved in a lot of investigations in my lifetime.”

Castor’s defense of Le Grand happened on the same day that she accepted Police Chief Mary O’Connor’s resignation. Castor requested the resignation after Creative Loafing Tampa Bay unearthed body camera video of O’Connor using her status to get out of a traffic stop. Earlier this year, Castor pushed for O’Connor to be police chief, despite a chorus of concern over O’Connor punching a cop during a 1995 DUI stop.

email to conduct city business, Tampa’s city attorney was caught using a private cell phone... to discuss the Dingfelder case, and other city business Castor condemned former councilman Dingfelder for using private email for city business, but didn’t care that her city attorney used a private cell to discuss the exact

Despite nearly everyone screaming not to pick a chief who previously fought a cop at a DUI stop, Castor’s handpicked choice to run TPD resigned in disgrace over a golf cart scandal O’Connor submitted her resignation less than a week after public records requests by Creative Loafing Tampa Bay unearthed body cam video showing her flashing her badge to get out of a traffic

JANE CASTOR/TWITTER

Mayor Jane Castor’s administration, also used her personal cell to discuss a property in Tampa city limits with Steven Michelini, a consultant for developer Jon Lum. The public records lawsuit that forced Dingfelder to resign as part of the settlement terms was filed on behalf of Michelini, with Loeb as the prosecuting attorney.

CASTING DOUBT: It’s been a rough year for Tampa’s leader.

violation on a golf cart. A press release said Tampa Mayor Jane Castor—who appointed O’Connor just nine months ago despite a contentious police chief search and pushback from the community—requested and accepted O’Connor’s resignation.

Her confirmation followed heavy criticism regarding lack of transparency by the mayor in the selection process, and concerns over a 1995 incident where O’Connor assaulted a Hillsborough County Sheriff’s deputy during a DUI stop. During the incident, O’Connor, who at the time was an officer with TPD, was riding in the passenger seat of a car when her future husband, Keith, was pulled over on suspicion of DUI by a Hillsborough County Sheriff deputy. Keith—at the wheel again during this latest incident—was charged with drunk driving, and deputies claimed O’Connor kicked the windows and punched a deputy when she was put in the back seat of a patrol car. The future police chief was charged with assault on an officer, obstruction and disorderly intoxication.

“This is especially disappointing because I gave Mary O’Connor a second chance, as I believe in second chances for people,” Castor continued in the release. “Which is one of the reasons that the disappointment today runs so deep. I had high hopes for Chief O’Connor, as she was off to such a strong start by reducing violent gun crime, proactively engaging with our community and focusing on officer wellness. But these accomplishments pale in comparison to the priority I place on integrity.”

City of Tampa settled a lawsuit against Councilman Orlando Gudes for a record $200,000, just two months before the case was dismissed A civil lawsuit against Tampa City Councilman Orlando Gudes was dismissed over the summer, two months after the City of Tampa announced a separate $200,000 settlement for Gudes’ accuser. In March, allegations against Gudes, which the city knew about since 2019, resurfaced. The councilman was accused of creating a toxic work environment and of sexual harassment by his former aide, who alleged that he used lewd language toward the them and their child.

After firing their previous lawyer Grady C. Irvin, the accuser obtained legal counsel of Ethan Loeb, the same development and business lawyer who sued former councilman John Dingfelder out of office. Upon reviewing the arguments of both legal teams, a Hillsborough County judge dismissed the case in July.

Castor lost 67% of one of her paychecks to Bitcoin, only to continue to shill for the crypto ponzi scheme a few months later In September, the mayor attended the opening of CoinFlip’s new “Crypto Experience Center” in downtown Tampa’s Sparkman Wharf and informed residents that the new business has “got it all.”

“The new Crypto Experience Center has such a unique approach to educating people on bitcoin & leveling the playing field for EVERYONE who is interested to learn & invest,” tweeted Castor. The mayor’s appearance at the event comes after the fact that her current crypto wallet, or at least part of it, took a giant hit. Last November, Castor hosted the Bitcoin and Blockchain Summit in Tampa and told media outlets that she would accept two paychecks in the form of Bitcoin, following other mayors, like Miami’s Francis Suarez, who also jumped on the crypto-bandwagon.

YEAR IN REVIEW

“Apologies for coming late to the conversation,” Castor tweeted in response to Suarez’s paycheck Bitcoin conversion announcement from Nov. 2. “But I’m certainly up for the challenge.”

According to public records, Castor’s annual salary in 2021 was $170,539. So, assuming she was paid bi-weekly, then one paycheck before taxes and other withholdings, comes out to approximately $6,559.

Now, putting this much money into crypto last fall probably didn’t seem that risky. To be fair, in November of 2021, Bitcoin was at a record high of $68,990, with tech bros predicting at the time it would surpass $100,000. Of course, that growth didn’t happen, and just about every cryptocurrency slumped to dismal levels last summer. Even today, the currency is valued at $20,147.80, which is a massive drop from its November peak.

So, where did all that money go? Well, it was cashed out by people who purchased Bitcoin before you did, and most importantly, realized it’s a pump-and-dump scheme before you did. Unfortunately, Mayor Castor did not do this. Comms director Adam Smith told CL that Mayor Castor’s paycheck is still invested in Bitcoin, which means if she converted it during that first week of November last year, according to the Bitcoin Profit Calculator, it would now be worth roughly $2,117, a loss of $4,441.

After unprecedented friction with city council, local leaders (including Tampa’s first woman mayor) publicly dragged Castor, and stated that she needs to be “more transparent and less defensive” Sandy Freedman was the city’s first woman mayor, taking the position over from former mayor

and less defensive. The mayor has to break bread with council members. We can’t have our elected officials lashing out at each other.”

Freedman said she would regularly discuss issues with council during her time as mayor. Meanwhile, multiple Tampa City Council members have claimed that Castor rarely communicates with them, even about important issues. “Civil discourse only occurs when people have a level of trust. And the only way to build that is to do it quietly,” Freedman said.

While Castor’s administration has called for transparency and accountability from council, some have pointed out that there needs to be more of that from the administration itself. Yvette Lewis, President of the NAACP Hillsborough County Branch, said she welcomes open talks with the mayor. “I was glad to see Mayor Castor finally talk about transparency,” Lewis wrote in an email. “It is past time for transparency in this administration. I would like to see transparency in civil rights complaints, employment discrimination, affordable housing, MBE participation, neighborhood development in East Tampa, police misconduct, police lawsuit settlements, and many more. What took so long?”

Castor wouldn’t apologize to a family whose father died in the hands of TPD, marking a trend of refusing to apologize for TPD’s actions Tampa Mayor Jane Castor doesn’t seem concerned with the healing power of apologies, at least when it comes to the way the Tampa Police Department has harmed the Black community. She has yet to apologize to the family of Arthur Green Jr., who died while restrained by TPD as he was having a diabetic emergency in 2014.

In July, WTSP reported that the city has settled an eight-year lawsuit with the family, who accused two TPD officers of using excessive force while trying to arrest Green as they failed to recognize he was having a medical emergency. As part of the settlement, Green’s family said they requested an official apology from Castor, who was police chief at the time of his death, but she refused. “The Tampa police didn’t treat our dad like a human being,” Arthur Green’s stepson Kurt Young told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. “And it’s deplorable that Jane Castor is trying to avoid accountability for that.”

Bob Martinez in 1986. Before that, she served on City Council from 1974 and then as Council Chair from 1983-1986. After completing the remainder of Martinez’s term, Freedman was twice elected Mayor of Tampa, serving from 1987-1995, so she’s seen what it’s like to be on both sides of city hall.

“The city council certainly needs to pay close attention to things and they need to speak up when they see something that they don’t think feels right, or in the public interest,” Freedman told CL. “And on the other side, the mayor’s administration itself has to be more transparent

Young said that he was raised by Green just like a biological son, and pointed out that he was a beacon of hope for the community and a mentor to many. Young said that TPD’s initial response was to try to vilify his dad, to avoid taking responsibility for what the police did to him.

“Castor had the chance to apologize and be on the right side of history, but she’d rather try to uphold this false narrative that my father was somehow in the wrong and that TPD acted according to policy,” Young said. The Greens are just one of many Black families that have been affected by TPD’s actions, especially when Castor was chief from 2009-2015.

FLIP SIDE: Two of Castor’s paychecks were invested in Bitcoin.

JANE CASTOR/TWITTER

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War on woke

DeSantis’ obsession among most important news stories of 2022.

By Jeffrey C. Billman

Last week, in the first part of our annual lazy columnist’s end-of-year listicle spectacular, we discussed the end of abortion rights, the nonexistent red wave, the collapse of Donald Trump, the Russia problem, and inflation. Now that you’re all caught up, part deux:

6. The Inflation Reduction Act The remnants of President Joe Biden’s Build Back Better program got a Joe Manchin-approved name and squeaked through the Senate in August, giving the president a much-needed positive news cycle.

The IRA invested nearly $400 billion into clean energy through tax incentives, loan guarantees, and grants. It also extended enhanced Affordable Care Act subsidies for three years and lowered drug costs for Medicare recipients, while trimming $237 billion from the deficit over a decade. (Notice the word “inflation” anywhere in there?) The IRA is not the Green New Deal. But combined with the CHIPS & Science Act, the Bipartisan Infrastructure Law, and the Covid relief law, it made Biden’s first two years among the most productive in modern history.

Carlson, and other right-wing hatemongers. Republican legislatures have passed laws to prevent one or two trans girls from participating in scholastic sports.

No one rode this horse harder than Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis. His administration forbid using Medicaid to pay for gender-affirming health care and banned gender-affirming care for transgender teenagers. At his urging, the Florida Legislature passed the “Don’t Say Gay” bill, prohibiting teachers from discussing sexual orientation or gender identity “in a manner that is not age appropriate or developmentally appropriate for students.”

INFORMED

When Disney belatedly and half heartedly objected, DeSantis got his legislative sycophants to eliminate the Mouse’s special tax status, potentially costing neighboring counties billions of dollars.

DeSantis’ press secretary said that anyone who opposed the bill was “probably a groomer.” She kept her job.

7. The Jan. 6 Committee Rep. Liz Cheney lost her job and wrote the first line of her obituary. Cheney is one of two Republicans on the House committee investigating the Jan. 6 insurrection. Throughout the year, she and her colleagues have laid bare Donald Trump’s plan to interfere in the certification of Biden’s election using absurd legal theories and ultimately incendiary shenanigans.

As of this writing— meaning, before your columnist signed off for the year—the committee was considering criminal referrals not just for Trump, but also for his chief of staff Mark Meadows, attorneys Rudy Giuliani and John Eastman, and former Department of Justice official Jeffrey Clark, who tried to make the DOJ an arm of Trump’s campaign in the administration’s waning months. For Cheney’s disloyalty to Trump, congressional Republicans removed her from her leadership position, and Wyoming Republicans tossed her in the primary.

8. The Woke War In November, a gunman murdered five people at a drag show in Colorado Springs. Weeks later, some yahoos shot out power transformers the night of a drag show in Southern Pines, North Carolina, that had been the subject of bible thumpers’ protests, casting the entire county into darkness. Doctors who treat transgender youth have faced death threats after being targeted by Libs of TikTok, Tucker

More than a dozen states have considered knock-off legislation. Of course, the war against the woke went well beyond trans kids. Florida also passed the Individual Freedom Act, previously known as the Stop W.O.K.E. Act, which barred schools and colleges from teaching anything that might hurt white children’s feelings, and prohibited private companies from conducting diversity training. Calling the law “dystopian,” a federal judge has struck down the parts about higher education and businesses.

In a recent court hearing, DeSantis’ lawyer was asked to define the governor’s favorite epithet: Woke, his general counsel said, is “the belief there are systemic injustices in American society and the need to address them.” Definitely a threat to be stopped.

Speaking of threats: From January to August, the American Library Association tracked 681 attempts to ban or restrict access to more than 1,600 books and other library materials. Most of them featured characters of color who were LGBTQ.

9. Respect for Marriage Act Moving on to important legislation that shouldn’t be necessary: the Respect for Marriage Act, which formally repealed the 1996 Defense of Marriage Act and codified same-sex (and interracial) marriage rights in case the Supreme Court jettisons more precedent in service of its far-right agenda.

The impetus wasn’t just the court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade and Casey v. Planned

Parenthood, in which five justices found that the 14th Amendment’s Due Process clause did not include the right to abortion, contrary to 49 years of case law. It was, more specifically, Justice Clarence Thomas’ concurring opinion. “In future cases,” Thomas wrote, “we should reconsider all of this Court’s substantive due process precedents, including Griswold, Lawrence, and Obergefell.”

Griswold established the right to contraception access. Lawrence prohibited states from criminalizing same-sex relations. Obergefell legalized same-sex marriage. You can see why people might be nervous. More than 190 Republicans voted against the Respect for Marriage Act.

10. Uvalde On May 24, an 18-year-old fatally shot 19 students and two teachers, and

injured 17 more, at Robb Elementary School in Uvalde, Tex., while hundreds of cops stood in the parking lot for more than an hour.

As of this writing, it’s one of 15 mass shootings this year that have produced five or more fatalities, not including the gunman: Ten dead in a Buffalo supermarket. Seven dead in an Oklahoma murder-suicide. Six killed in a Walmart shooting. Six people killed in a Fourth of July parade in Illinois. Five dead in a California gang shootout. And so on.

In June, Biden signed the first “major” gun legislation in decades. It provides states with money for crisis intervention programs, including red flag laws, and made modest improvements to background check laws. But it banned no guns—not even assault rifles.

DESANCTIMONIOUS: No one rode the anti-trans horse harder than Florida’s governor.

DAVE DECKER

“The war against the woke went well beyond trans kids.”

DISSENT

YEAR IN REVIEW

RESTAURANTS RECIPES DINING GUIDES

Chef’s kiss

The most read foodie stories of 2022.

By Ray Roa

We’ve got egg on our face, and it’s from all the breakfast sandwiches we ate at downtown Tampa’s Supernatural Food & Wine. We weren’t alone though. A story about that particular BEC dominated web traffic in 2022. Here’s that tale, with the other big flavor bombs scrambled in.

Celebrity Chef Alton Brown says the breakfast sandwich at Tampa’s Supernatural is ‘best I’ve ever had’ Food Network and Cooking Channel Chef Alton Brown was in town last February appearance at the Straz Center, and it seems he took a liking to some of downtown Tampa’s two best places to eat and get tipsy. Brown, 59, visited Supernatural Food & Wine yesterday and posted that chef Wesley Roderick & co. make the “best breakfast sandwich ever.”

He and his wife, interior designer Elizabeth Ingram, also visited downtown dive bar The Hub yesterday where their rescue dogs—a Boston terrier named Scabigail van Buren Brown and her brother Francis Luther—enjoyed hospitality from bartender Kamran Mir (who is the creator of Tampa’s signature cocktail). Brown ordered a PBR and Buffalo Trace; Ingram ordered an Aperol and soda. I went to Supernatural— located at 305 E Polk St., next door to The Hub—to ask Roderick about the encounter. But Brown and Ingram were outside, so I bought a couple of Supernatural’s Best of the Bay-winning doughnuts to share. I also asked the chef to confirm his stance on the food and wine store’s bacon, egg and cheese sandwich. “The best I’ve had,” Brown confirmed. “The best ever.”

Florida residents will be among first in nation subjugated by hard Mountain Dew The state that arguably most deserves an alcoholic version of Mountain Dew more than anywhere else on the planet, was thankfully one of the first to taste it. In February, parent company PepsiCo announced that its latest concoction Hard MTN Dew, would first be available in Florida, Tennessee and Iowa. The new 100-calorie, spiked seltzer contains 5% alcohol by volume, and comes in four flavors, like the original MTN DEW, Baja Blast, black cherry and watermelon, available in either in 24-ounce single-serve cans or 12-packs of 12-ounce cans. May god have mercy on your soul.

Months after getting ‘Bar Rescued,’ Ybor restaurant The Loft closed A Tampa

RAY ROA

restaurant featured in the most recent season of ‘Bar Rescue’ permanently closed over the summer. The closure of Ybor City’s The Loft, previously known as Cerealholic Cafe and Bar, came just a few short months after host Jon Taffer “shut it down.” Owners Lisa and Darrell Lawson go on to explain that they need to focus on family issues that require their full attention, and a spooky speakeasy concept has since revived the room.

Tampa restaurants earn three Bib Gourmands, no stars, in first-ever Florida Michelin Guide Ichicoro Ramen and Rooster & the Till in Seminole Heights, and Rocca in Tampa Heights earned Bib Gourmand designation, which Michelin recognizes as a great

go to the Florida Strawberry Festival for the live music and attractions, while others make the drive to Plant City for some of the best fair food in Tampa Bay. The fest’s food lineup usually drops in February.

St. Petersburg’s first Portillo’s finally opens The ‘Burg landed this temple of sorts for Midwestern-transplants and hot dog-lovers. Complete with vintage-feeling 50’s decor, a drive thru and an outdoor patio, the Burg’s new Portillo’s definitely jazzed up the Tyrone area of St. Petersburg—with the closest restaurant 32 miles away in North Tampa.

Downtown St. Petersburg hotspot MacDinton’s unexpectedly closes You’ll have to find another bar for your First Friday ragers. Without stating why, the popular Irish pub at 242 1st Ave. N officially closed on April 2. Welcome To The Farm, a new bar and venue from country star Chase Rice and Jannus Live owner Jeff Knight opened in its place.

Tampa Chick-fil-A owner fined $12K for violating child labor laws On Aug. 2, a Tampa Chick-fil-A franchise, located at 2551 N Dale Mabry Hwy., was fined by the U.S. Department of Labor (DOL) for violating child labor laws. Investigators found that between Labor Day and June 1, the fast-food restaurant, which is owned by Brito Enterprises of Tampa Inc., allowed 17 workers, ages 14 and 15, to work past 7 p.m. or more than three hours during a school day. The did not, however, work on Sundays.

Every Gasparilla 2022 party we know about From the usual suspects (hello, MacDinton’s) to less-expected ones, (Winn-Dixie, Checkers) you thirsty readers are always ready to Gaspy.

The Pinellas Farmers and Flea Market is also an Asian food paradise With Tampa Bay flea markets closing at a rapid rate, the Pinellas’ Farmers & Flea Market is a breath of fresh air. And that air smells like spicy Vietnamese beef soup.

value. Sixteen Tampa restaurants were classified as “recommended” by Michelin, including Yummy House, Koya, Columbia, Bern’s, Mise en Place and more. Restaurants in Pinellas County were not visited by Michelin inspectors because bringing the guide to the Sunshine State was an effort coordinated by Visit Florida, Visit Orlando, Visit Tampa Bay and Greater Miami Convention and Visitors Bureau—with Visit St. Pete Clearwater (VSPC) not included.

‘Holy Macaroni’: Florida Strawberry Festival releases new food lineup Some folks

Dunedin’s Feinstein Restaurant Group implements new commission-based pay model, but not without criticism In the most simple terms, the change moves tipped employees at Feinstein Group restaurants to a commission based model. The pivot is an attempt by the Feinsteins to get ahead of the increase in the minimum wage of $15 and provide a living wage not just for servers and bartenders but for TFG cooks, expos, dishwashers and other back of house staff, plus front of house staff like bussers and bar backs.

A Plant City couple had a Checkers & Rally’s-themed wedding From a meet-cute at a mutual friend’s wedding to a chicken tender bouquet, a Plant City couple has a bond that’s as strong as their love for Checkers & Rally’s. Victoria and Arley Smude tied the knot in February, alongside a 43-foot chicken tender and fry-trailer. The two got the idea to include Checkers & Rally’s from their proposal, which included Victoria using five Checkers’ Fry Burgers, and Arley biting a symbolic “yes” into them.

BROWN’S VILLE: Chef Alton Brown will never forget his trips to Supernatural Food & Wine.

Call the police

Five-O Donuts opens in St. Pete, plus more local foodie news.

By Kyla Fields

he Burg’ has a new spot for artisan doughnuts, and some of its unique flavors might have you double taking at its menu. Christine Nordstrom opened her first St. Pete location of Five-O Donuts out the former Uptown Snoballs space at 1003 4th St. N. Five-O Donuts on Sunday, Dec. 18

According to fiveodonutco. com, the dessert shop offers 24 different types of doughnuts daily—separated into two categories, “simple” and “fancy.” Simple donuts include classic flavors like glazed, chocolate iced yeast, cinnamon sugar cake, powdered cake and lemon old fashioned, while fancier donuts range from Reeses croissant, Boston cream, peanut butter-filled, maple bacon and cookie butter cheesecake.

The doughnut shop also has a variety of vegan and gluten-free doughnuts that change flavors often. In addition to its wide spread of sweet treats, Five-O also sells juices, milks and sodas.

The first Five-O opened in downtown Sarasota in 2017, as other locations elsewhere in Sarasota, Bradenton and Siesta Key followed shortly after.

Shaved ice dessert shop Uptown Snoballs debuted in St. Pete in early 2020, but closed a mere few months ago.

Five-O is open from 7 a.m.-2 p.m. Monday through Friday and 8 a.m.-2 p.m. on Saturdays and Sundays. Its prized doughnuts will also be available via Uber Eats, GrubHub, Door Dash and Bite Squad as well. For more information on Five-O’s upcoming St. Pete location, follow its Facebook at @fiveostpete or Instagram at @fiveodonutco.

Foodie festival and charity event ‘Taste at the Straz’ returns to downtown Tampa next year Taste at the Straz is one of the best ways to discover your new favorite Tampa Bay restaurant, and it’s finally back for its 2023 rendition. The all-you-can-eat-and-drink party happens on

April 9, 2023, starts at 6 p.m. and ends whenever you’re too full or drunk. Best of all is that much of it takes place at 1010 N Macinnes Pl. in downtown Tampa, right there on the Riverwalk. While the full restaurant list for 2023’s installment of Taste at the Straz (stylized “TASTE”) has yet to be announced, a few pop -

Tickets for Taste at the Straz happening on Saturday, April 9 are on sale now, starting at $95 for general admission. VIP tickets go for $175 each, but come with a variety of perks like early entry and access to all VIP lounges, in addition to all you can eat and drink. And if you’re really trying to spend some bread, you can reserve a $2,000 table for you and nine of your closest friends.

In addition to a wide spread of local eats, wine, cocktails and craft beer, live music will take place on 4 different outdoor stages

Funds raised from next year’s Taste at the Straz supports the theater’s various programs. As the Straz team says, “supporting the arts never tasted so good.” According to its website, the Straz Center has raised upwards of $3 million for its art initiatives and programs since the inception of Taste many years ago.

Brunched, Creative Loafing Tampa Bay’s all-you-can-eat event returns next year

Each year, Creative Loafing Tampa Bay partners with local bars and restaurants to provide guests with some of the best brunch samples and daytime cocktails in the Bay area. Next year’s Brunched takes over the Tampa River Center— located at 402 W Laurel St. at Julian B. Lane Riverfront Park— on Saturday, Feb. 18, 2023. In addition to unlimited brunch samples, this exciting event also features a bloody mary competition (where folks can vote for their favorite cocktail), a variety of boozy beverages, photo opportunities and tasty waterfront views.

Although the full list of participating bars and restaurants has yet to be released, a few eateries that we hope will return for 2023’s Brunched include Sweep Coffee, Fresco’s, Sea Dog Cantina, Hew Parlor and Chophouse, Bulla Gastrobar, Cru Cellars, 7th + Grove, Shuffle and Dough. General admission tickets are on sale now for $45, GA-plus runs for $65 and VIP tickets are $75. All ticketing tiers come with unlimited brunch bites, bubbles and complimentary parking, but GA Plus folks can access the event at noon, while VIP ticket holders can enter even earlier at 11 a.m. This event has sold out in the past, so we recommend getting your tickets ASAP.

ular Tampa Bay restaurants that we hope return for another year include The Brunchery, Fresh Kitchen, Bavaro’s, Noble Crust, Buy Ramen, Columbia, Portillo’s and Butter’s Burgers— alongside many, many more.

throughout the event. The exact lineups are yet to be announced, so make sure to follow its Facebook page and @strazcenter on Instagram for the latest updates on 2023’s TASTE at the Straz party.

A portion of the proceeds from Brunched will benefit The Laundry Project, a local nonprofit that helps lowincome families wash their clothes and linens. For more information, visit brunchedtampabay.com. And to get an even better idea of what to expect from 2023’s event, make sure to check out our “Everyone we saw at Brunched 2022” slideshow.

O-HOLE, YEAH: A Sarasota-Bradenton favorite opens in the ‘Burg.

Cinephile sanctuary

Step inside Ybor City’s newest hidden gem.

By Jessi Sherbet

Off 7th avenue in the heart of Ybor, three friends have formed Tampa’s first official microcinema with a simple yet potent vision: to show an eclectic range of films that are hard to find anywhere else in the city.

Located on the second floor of the newly revitalized Historic Ybor City Kress building, Screen Door Microcinema is nestled in a room which neighbors several new art spaces. It’s one of 13 new spots within the annex that opened this year, which, as a whole, is being referred to as the “Kress Collective.”

The 800-square-foot microcinema holds 38 seats, has theater quality sound and screen, Super 8-mm, 35-mm, and 16-mm projectors, and a vast collection of films. A large bulk of the cinema’s equipment was graciously loaned by the University of Tampa’s Department of Film, Animation, and New Media (FMX).

Since Screen Door’s opening in October, the microcinema has already shown nearly 40 programs, spanning genres and broadening the movie-loving community along the way. The co-founders aim to create a space for others to not only discover, but to also participate in the rich culture of film that can sometimes be hidden in plain sight.

Warren Cockerham, one of three co-owners, is a professor at University of Tampa, where he teaches Film. He grew up in Brooksville, Florida, and only recently discovered that there was a significant experimental cinema festival, Chinsegut Film Symposium, held in his own hometown for 27 years, from 1976-2003. He wants people to have access to the culture of cinema that he and many others didn’t have growing up.

“All these luminaries of visionary film would come to Brooksville and install these big, outdoor installations, right where I grew up and for the entire time that I was growing up,” he said. “It started like the year before I was born and ended right before I went to college.”

“It was there [in my hometown] the whole time and I never knew about it because the artists themselves and the programmers themselves didn’t even think about the community there,” he said.

After Warren moved from Brooksville to Gainesville to learn about experimental film at the University of Florida, he wondered what

it would look like for students to learn outside of the classroom. Cockerham’s passion about exhibiting films within the community extends to the cinephiles in his classrooms, too. Film majors Penelope Vaughn and Ethan Tamasar, students of Cockerham’s, expressed gratitude for a cinema sanctuary like Screen Door.

“To be able to hear a projector roll the film out is a different experience than other modern movie theaters,” said Vaughn.

Tamasar feels it’s the only space that’s in his area where like-minded people in the arts can meet each other.

“It’s not a pretentious space in the slightest, but it attracts enthusiasts who are passionate

monthly series located at Crowbar that mixes movies, music, and art.

Since February 2015, Musoke has been curating monthly pop-up cinema events under the name “Second Screen Cult Cinema” alongside Tyler Martinolich and Michael Martz, with much success.

Musoke said she met Warren and Sean through Second Screen and when the opportunity for the Screen Door space came up it all just came together. “We immediately knew that we couldn’t pass up the opportunity to have a permanent space for movies where we weren’t limited to monthly events”, she said.

FILM & TV

that don’t get to see their cultures represented on the big screen, we want to rent you the theater so you and your friends can get together laugh and watch that crappy movie that in 100 years would never be shown again in the theater, we want to do a special screening of your music video for your friends and family, we want to host talks.”

1624 E 7th Ave., Ybor City.

ybormicrocinema.org

She continued that there are a few theaters in Tampa Bay playing indie and cult movies, but not many. Having a small theater with low overhead gives Screen Door the ability to take

In November, the crew invited filmmaker Georg Koszulinski to discuss the 15th anniversary screening of his film “Cracker Crazy,” where he shared personal stories about the making of the film. Screen Door also exhibited Kent Mackenzie’s “The Exiles” in 16-mm film, and opened the stage to Tampa-based sound project “AntiPriest” to perform a live score for the 1922 Benjamin Christensen film “Haxan.”

In December they showed classics such as the Orson Welles-directed thriller "The Stranger," stunned a full house with Saul William’s 2021 science fiction and romantic musical “Neptune Frost,” and showcased several festive holiday flicks. In January and February, the trio will screen some A24 titles that are Oscar contenders as well as several new releases from the production company behind popular movies such as “Spring Breakers” and “The Florida Project.”

The microcinema is a hidden gem. Located between Revolve Clothing Exchange and the Habibi Hookah Bar, there is no indication on the front of the building except an occasional A-frame sign during events.

Tracy Midulla, facilitator of the Ybor Kress building and director and founder of the Tempus Projects, envisioned that the space would be perfect for Musoke, O’Brien, and Cockerham.

“I thought, I have to call these guys because this thing is happening and it better not happen without them,” Midulla said.

She said it’s very important that the Kress Collective have more than just galleries. The building already houses visual arts, performing arts and literary arts. But it was important for Midulla to include Screen Door, so that the space can appeal to multiple “creative entities.”

about film or just art in general, and that is something that I’ve never experienced before,” he added.

Ann-Eliza Musoke and Sean O’Brien, the other two founders of Screen Door, are wellknown for their own film events around Tampa Bay. O’Brien founded “Reel Deal Thursdays”, a

the kind of risks with programming larger spaces can’t.

In a Facebook post, Sean O’Brien said that the three refuse to limit themselves on what the space can be or who can be involved with it. “We want to show your student film, we want to screen that foreign film for people in this town

Screen Door co-founder Musoke sees films as a communal and creative activity. For her, the best thing about watching movies is being with other people and talking about it afterwards.

“Movies were made to watch in the dark with friends and strangers and experience shared storytelling,” she said.

MOVIES THEATER ART CULTURE

“Movies were made to watch in the dark with friends and strangers and experience shared storytelling.”

DAVE DECKER

Screen Door Microcinema at the Kress Collective

SCENE TEAM: (L-R) Screen Door co-founders Warren Cockerham, Ann-Eliza Musoke and Sean O’Brien.

Chew on this

Ybor’s affordable art studios among top A&E stories of 2022.

By Ray Roa

Call it the Tom Brady effect, but The Buccaneers have dominated web traffic in the A&E section since TB12 decided he wanted to play in Tampa Bay. To level the playing field, we took the team out of this collection of top stories (see our top Bucs coverage on p. 34). Readers flocked to was largely things-to-do, but they also landed on stories about reality TV, Rhonda Santis, Ybor art studios and even the Rays.

Netflix dating show ‘Love is Blind’ is looking for Tampa contestants You’re a thirsty bunch, Tampa Bay. Hope you submitted an application because if you’re tired of swiping on dating apps and would prefer your dating life to be filmed from inside a pod, the popular dating show “Love is Blind” was now looking for residents in Tampa, Detroit, Charlotte and Washington D.C. to help form the cast of new singles for its upcoming season. The show, which is now on its fourth season and is hosted by Nick and Vanessa Lachey, is centered on couples speed dating via pods, where they can only talk through a speaker and drink booze from metal cups (for those extra spicy edits). Of course, after 10 days, and after they agree to get engaged, they finally get to go outside and eventually decide whether or not to get married.

Enchant returns for third year at Tropicana Field with massive Christmas maze and millions of lights You still have time to see Enchant, dubbed the world’s largest holiday-themed light event, since it runs through New Years Day. New to this year’s event is a national sponsor, the Hallmark Channel. The television network known for its cheesy-cute holiday movies will feature at Enchant events with a “Hallmark Cozy Christmas” lounge, photo spots, a wine tasting and a chance for guests to win a visit to the set of a Hallmark movie in production.

It looks like the Tampa Bay Rays’ plan for an Ybor stadium is a bust At this point, any pub still writing about the Rays eyeing an Ybor stadium is just holding water for Stu Sternberg in his quest to make St. Pete give him everything he wants . Last June, he took another L in his fight to hold on to as much money as possible, and well, we’re sick of this headline.

The new Batmobile from ‘The Batman’ was in Tampa Before “The Batman” hit theaters in the spring, fans got a glimpse of the film’s iconic car and costumes at a pop-up experience that stopped in Tampa as part of a four-city tour.

UK artist Lucy Sparrow’s ‘Tampa Fresh Foods’ felt grocery store landed in Water Street Water Street Tampa’s newest art installation begged the question, “What if food was

FADI GARCIA

soft, inedible and had button eyes?” British artist Lucy Sparrow introduced her latest overwhelmingly plush project with “Tampa Fresh Foods,” an entirely felt-based grocery store. The installation showcased more than 50,000 quirky felt artworks representing foods both typical of grocery stores and native to Tampa, all for individual sale.

A St. Pete artist is selling ‘Rhonda Santis’ stickers to benefit Equality Florida

a rainbow flag with a speech bubble that says, “gay,” hinting at Florida’s so-called “Dont’ Say Gay” bill that restricts talk of gender identity and sexual orientation in the classroom.

Tampa Bay’s Peak Surf Park shares new renderings, findings from analysis of proposed Pinellas site An opening date is definitely a ways off, and there’s still no location to share, but Tampa Bay inched closer to catching a wave at the region’s first surf park when Peak Surf Park shared new renderings of the project that promises to bring half-a-mile of beach, venues for concerts and events, bars, restaurants, retail and more.

YEAR IN REVIEW

As Florida continues to face unprecedented legislative attacks on LGBTQ+ communities, one St. Petersburg artist is responding with a dig of his own. Chad Mize, multimedia artist and designer, is now selling stickers depicting Gov. Ron Desantis as drag queen “Rhonda Santis.” The design came weeks after the Florida republican expressed support of criminalizing parents who bring their children to drag shows.

“Well, let’s do something even more ridiculous and put him in drag,” Mize told Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. Rhonda is shown waving

Tampa’s ‘Meatyard Ybor’ could include more than 50 affordable art workspaces and gallery Plans are still in the site review phase, but an Ybor City warehouse could eventually be home to approximately 55 affordable art workspaces plus gallery space. A representative from the Tampa Arts Alliance told CL that The Meatyard Ybor—located at 1728 E. 2nd Ave.—is named in honor of Jerry Meatyard who was a sculptor in the historic district and professor at Hillsborough Community College’s Ybor Campus from 1969 to 2001. Jerry—which is what his students called him— died in 2016 at the age of 86.

We need to talk about why Disney’ World’s new Star Wars: Galactic Starcruiser is getting so much heat Besides more critiques of the pricetag, criticisms and attacks were leveled at members of the media who visited the Starcruiser and shared coverage—from traditional written reviews and video recaps to Twitter threads, TikTok shorts and photo guides.

As park continues to expand, Busch Gardens Tampa insists its not killing off Kumba After a two-year delay, Busch Gardens Tampa was finally able to open its highly-anticipated Iron Gwazi coaster in March. With that project now welcoming guests, the park is looking at its next significant investments. Kumba’s size and age are now why rumors are swirling of its impending demise. First reported by theme site Screamscape, the rumored closure of Kumba quickly filled coaster fan message boards. Busch Gardens Tampa, which typically doesn’t respond to rumors, tweeted a cryptic message that included a video of the coaster with a note that “Hear this roar? It’s not going anywhere.” The park also replied to a tweet by Screamscape stating, “PLOT TWIST—the doc pulled the wrong patient files. Kumba’s not going anywhere, but we still definitely recommend riding it ASAP.”

Auguste Rodin, The Shade, first modelled c. 1880, enlarged c. 1901, this cast 1969 (Musée Rodin 6/12), Bronze, Los Angeles County Museum of Art, Gift of B. Gerald Cantor Art Foundation, photo © Museum Associates/LACMA

This exhibition was organized by the Los Angeles County Museum of Art.

Fire the cannons

You guys clicked the hell out of some Bucs stories.

By Carter Brantley

By at least two touchdowns, Bucs coverage was the most read stuff in Creative Loafing Tampa Bay’s Arts & Entertainment section. I’ve been proud of our young football writer’s fandom and willingness to put all-too-real takes and score predictions out there. While it was hilarious to see Gronk’s condo sale make headlines, it was quarterbacks—but not necessarily Brady—that took up up all the air.

Antonio Brown is promoting his music while running from the Tampa Police Department Tampa Police Department (TPD) issued an arrest warrant for Antonio Brown stemming from a November domestic battery charge. And, while the former Tampa Bay Buccaneer wide receiver-turned rapper was still on the lam earlier this month, he’s been using this time to promote his new music.

Towers of Channelside complex, went on the market for $5.4 million. But now Gronk went on social media to say the place is a “dump,” and he doesn’t want to be affiliated with the sale. “It was the only option at the time,” said Gronk in the post. “The whole unit needs to be redone. The owner is trying to rip people off/he is not a good guy. Stop using my name to sell it.” Gronk isn’t the first (and he certainly won’t be the last) person in Tampa to reportedly experience the wrath of a negligent landlord.

YEAR IN REVIEW

The five most likely quarterbacks for the Tampa Bay Bucs next season A month before Brady ended his 40-day retirement, Bucs columnist Carter Brantley went off on potential QBs for Tampa Bay. We can just run the same article again this offseason, right?

‘The unit is a dump’: Gronk now knows what it’s like to rent in Tampa One of the more appealing things about four-time Super Bowl champ Rob Gronkowski is he really does pull off the “normal guy” persona, and it just so happens that getting screwed by a shitty landlord is one of the most normal things that can happen to anyone in Tampa.

In October, Gronk’s former downtown Tampa rental, a 4,462 square-foot penthouse in the

Tom Brady will come out firing after last week’s embarrassing loss After getting beat by Cleveland, Carter was right about TB12—it just took a miracle fourth quarter drive to make his prediction for a win come true. Pretty sure Carter said Tampa Bay would win the Super Bowl this year, too.

When it comes to Kyler Murray being the next Bucs QB, never say never We’re all for this social media conspiracy to bubble back up.

GOAT EEEEEEE! Tampa Bay cost him his marriage, but at least Brady can be himself here.

KYLE

TIME FOR CHANGE: ART AND SOCIAL UNREST IN THE JORGE M. PÉREZ COLLECTION

On view through August 27, 2023

Exhibition Sponsor:

JACOB HASHIMOTO: THIS PARTICLE OF DUST

On view through 2024

HIGHLIGHTS FROM THE KARAM COLLECTION

On view through January 15, 2023

POETRY IN PAINT: THE ARTISTS OF OLD TAMPA BAY Selections from Alfred Frankel’s Artists of Old Florida, 1840-1960

On view through January 23, 2023

Contributor Sponsor:

PURVIS YOUNG: REDUX

On view through June 30, 2024

Presented in part by:

LIFE & DEATH IN THE ANCIENT WORLD: INTRODUCTION TO THE ANTIQUITIES COLLECTION

Opening Winter 2023

EDQMC TampaMuseum.org

Hours: Monday – Sunday: 10am – 5pm Thursday: 10am – 8pm

DRAPO VODOU: HAITIAN VODOU FLAGS FROM THE PERMANENT COLLECTION

Opening Winter 2023

TRAVELS IN ITALY: A 19TH-CENTURY JOURNEY THROUGH PHOTOGRAPHY

On view January 12 through July 9, 2023

Supporting Sponsor:

Dwell well

Tampa Bay’s most popular homes of 2022.

By Colin Wolf

Tampa Bay’s housing market over the last 12 months was arguably the most insane it’s ever been, and through it all some wild houses emerged. From mansions featured on reality shows, to celebrity rentals and a palace once owned by a Bucs co-owner, here are 2022’s most viewed homes for sale featured on Creative Loafing Tampa Bay’s website. See the full list and more photos of the joints via cltampa.com/slideshows.

Tampa’s infamous Bilzerian mansion

Back in January, the former childhood home of Dan Bilzerian, a professional poker player and so-called “King of Instagram,” was on the market in Tampa’s gated Avila community. Located at 16229 Villarreal De Avila, the home was built in 1992 by his father Paul Bilzerian, a disgraced corporate fraudster who served 13 months in prison for illegal stock manipulation.

The 28,363-square-foot home sits on 3.4 acres and comes with a total of 10 bedrooms and 19 bathrooms, as well as a wine room, elevator, four fireplaces, a swimming pool with waterfall and slide, and an “athletic wing,” featuring a gym, plus indoor basketball and racquetball courts. For years the home sat on the market and at one point was listed as high as $18 million. In 2016, a trust paid $2.85 million for the home in what the Tampa Bay Times called the area’s “most notorious and expensive foreclosure.”

The home is currently off the market.

The ‘Edward Scissorhands’ house in Lutz Tim Burton’s 1990 goth classic “Edward Scissorhands” was filmed all around Tampa Bay, and the famous house from the movie was on the market this year. Located at 1774 Tinsmith Cir. in Lutz, the 1,432-square-foot fictional Boggs’ house— where Edward (played by Johnny Depp) trimmed the hedges to look like dinosaurs and stabbed the waterbed—features three bedrooms and two bathrooms. Most importantly, it “comes with ALL the priceless collection of memorabilia from the movie,” says the listing.

The home was recently turned into a free museum by the current owner, Joey Licalzi, who purchased the property at auction in September of 2020. “It’s crazy,” said Licalzi to Creative Loafing Tampa Bay. “We bought a running theme park with a worldwide following for $230,000.” Licalzi told CL that it was essentially fate that he won the bid, since he worked on the set of the film as a dishwasher. After Licalzi moved in he rehabbed and transformed the house into a live-in homage to the Tim Burton masterpiece. This year the asking price was as high as $699,900, but the home is now off the market.

Cigar City Brewing founder Joey Redner’s South Tampa mansion The house that Jai Alai built is no longer on the market.

According to property records, the South Tampa home of Tampa beer mogul Joey Redner sold this year for a loss at $5.75 million. The home had been on the market for about two years, and at one point was listed as high as $7.495 million.

In July of 2016, Redner purchased the home for $6.4 million, which was one of the biggest local real estate deals that year. A few months prior to the purchase, Redner sold a controlling stake of Cigar City Brewing to Colorado-based Oskar Blues for an estimated $60 million. Last January, Oskar Blues was purchased by energy drink company Monster Beverage for a reported $330 million cash.

Located at 823 S Bayside Dr., in Beach Park, the 7,379-square-foot home was built in 1925, and comes with a total of six bedrooms and nine bathrooms, including a detached guesthouse. It

Beach, the property was home to the cast of season three of the MTV reality series “Floribama Shore” and can now be yours for $4,200,000.

The 3,862-square-foot home comes with four-bedroom and four-bathrooms, and features Brazilian hardwood throughout, a four-car garage, an elevator, a deep water dock, a pool and a heated jacuzzi, and a designer kitchen where Gus and Cole famously got into a fight while eating pizza over who was more “trash,” Florida boys or Georgia boys. The listing agent is Chris Featherston of Coastal Properties Group.

more than likely the Starboy himself, and now the pad that once housed him and his whole crew is selling for $12,499,999.

The home was also where Tom Brady and family stayed after Jeter sold his house down the street and kicked ‘em all out. The 6,651-square-foot home comes with six bedrooms and five bathrooms, as well as a rooftop terrace, a four-car garage, a custom wine cellar, and elevator, and more.

YEAR IN REVIEW

Tom Brady and The Weeknd’s rental on Davis Islands The pad that hosted Tampa’s last Super Bowl Halftime Show performer and MVP is now for sale on Davis Islands.

Last February, days before Super Bowl LV, Page Six reported that the Grammy-winning singer The Weeknd spent $100,000 to rent a house on Davis Islands. According to the publication, the 6,000 square-foot house had an asking price of $9.1 million and featured

The listing agent is Allan Mezrah of The Toni Everett Company.

The ‘ABBA House’ in Tierra Verde A home that has quite a few solid ties to the Swedish supergroup behind hits like “Dancing Queen” and “Mamma Mia” is now on the market just outside of St. Petersburg. Located at 873 2nd Ave. S in Tierra Verde, the waterfront home was built in 1982, and was designed in the Swedish Longhouse style, which means there’s two identical wings with two bedrooms, two baths and shared rooms in the middle. Perfect for a band featuring two married couples.

also features 170-feet of waterfront, a pool and spa, an outdoor kitchen, a treehouse, a bocce ball court, and more. After being represented by others, the listing agent who finally got the sale done was Jennifer Zales with Coldwell Banker Realty.

The St. Pete Beach house from MTV’s ‘Floribama Shore’ Theplace where a group of 20-somethings centered their entire summer around the phrase “puke and rally” is for sale. Located at 225 Punta Vista Dr., in St Pete

six bedrooms, and a “pool, bay views and a private dock.” At the time, there were only 11 properties for sale on Davis Islands, and the only one that fit this description in every single way was a modern behemoth on Riviera Drive. On top of this, the listing agent also confirmed to Creative Loafing Tampa Bay that the house was indeed being rented for the upcoming Super Bowl, but would not say exactly who was staying there. Well, it was

For years, the home has been known locally as the “ABBA House,” and while there’s no hard evidence that the disco supergroup ever actually owned it, or even stayed there for that matter, there are quite a few clues that suggest the rumors might actually be true. According to property records, the lot was initially purchased in 1982 by Andante Music, Ltd., which has ties to ABBA’s former business manager John Spalding.

ANTE UP: The former childhood home of Dan Bilzerian, a professional poker player and so-called ‘King of Instagram.’

ZILLOW

Of course, “Andante, Andante” is also the name of a ABBA song on the 1981 album Super Trouper

Local agent Randell Irena, who worked with the original listing agent (who is now deceased), told Premier Sotheby’s International that the home was the most expensive sale in Tierra Verde at the time, and while he never met any members of ABBA, Spalding represented the group on the transaction. Property records also show that Spalding’s signature is found under “Grantor” on the home’s deed.

But the best evidence of the home’s connection to ABBA, was arguably found inside the house. The home sold to the current owners in 1986 for $510,000, and according to Sotheby’s, sound equipment was left in the house “with ABBA tapes stuck in it.” The current owners never touched it to preserve it, says the company, and now those pieces of memorabilia are included in the sale.

The 4,527-square-foot home comes with six bedrooms and six bathrooms, and you’ll certainly need some “money, money, money” to buy it since the estate is currently asking $2,999,900. The listing agent is Lisa Farmer of Premier Sothebys Intl Realty.

Buccaneers co-owner’s massive Tampa palace Last April, Tampa Bay Buccaneers co-owner Darcie Glazer Kassewitz, and her husband Joel, sold their gigantic Tampa mansion, which is literally modeled after a 17th century royal palace. According to the Multiple Listing Service, the home was sold for $8.3 million.

Located at 706 Guisando De Avila, the home was purchased by Darcie and Joel from former gold dealer and convicted fraudster Mark Yaffe for $5.8 million in 2014. The 28,295-square-foot Avila estate comes with 10 bedrooms and 13 bathrooms, as well as a ballroom, an executive library, 14 fireplaces, a wine room, an elevator, a pool and spa, and more.

Glazer Kassewitz is a co-owner of the Bucs (along with her brothers), and she also leads the Glazer Vision Foundation and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers Foundation. The sale came a few months after the couple also sold its Palm Beach pad for $53 million.

Rob Gronkowski’s former Tampa penthouse The downtown Tampa condo “Gronk” called home during his two-season stint with the Buccaneers went on the market last October. As first reported by the Tampa Bay Business Journal, Rob Gronkowski’s one-time penthouse is located on the 28th floor of the Towers at Channelside and was asking $5.4 million, which is the most expensive listing in the history of the property.

Gronk, who has since retired from the NFL, rented the 4,462 square-foot penthouse from 2020-2022, and besides owning the the pad of a guy who snagged two touchdowns from Brady in Super Bowl LV, the space also comes with four bedrooms, five bathrooms, and a 1,000-square-foot wraparound terrace, among other things. The list agent is Nick Janovsky

of Premier Sothebys Intl Realty.

The former St. Pete home of Tampa Bay Bucs legend Mike ‘A-Train’ Alstott A home that once belonged to the greatest NFL fullback of all time is now on the market in St. Petersburg. Located at 7800 9th Ave. S, the waterfront home sits within Yacht Club Estates and was owned by former Tampa Bay Buccaneer star Michael “A-Train” Alstott, who purchased the home in 1999 for $775,000, according to property records.

The 6,032-square foot home was originally built in 1961 and was completely remodeled for Alstott and his family, says the listing. The home comes with five bedrooms and five bathrooms, as well as red oak flooring, a saltwater pool and spa, 143 feet of frontage with a dock and boat lift, a game room with a full bar capable of holding three kegs, a multi-level office with a gym, and more.

home is believed to be built in 1918 by R.B. Worthington for $50,000. Throughout the years, the property has changed hands quite a few times and has been home to many notable and wealthy locals, including St. Pete businessman Hubert Rutland, and real estate developer Philip Farley, who most recently purchased it in 2004 for $2.3 million.

YEAR IN REVIEW

Located at 5030 Sunrise Dr. S, the 9,093-square-foot Tudor-style home now features seven bedrooms and 12 bathrooms, as well as six fireplaces, a library, a massive dining room, another dining room, 15 living rooms, a sitting parlor, a detached guest house, a double-lane lap pool, a pool house, a bocce ball court, a putting green, and 400 feet of shoreline along Little Bayou. The listing agent is Jac Smith Keller Williams of St Pete Realty.

The company was eventually sold in 1988 to Australian-based CSR Ltd. for $515 million, which is the equivalent of more than $1.1 billion in today’s dollars when you adjust for inflation. After the acquisition, Marshal Rinker Jr. stayed on and served on the board of directors.

This 11,622-home home has been on and off the market for years, but is now listed at $11,950,000. The six-bedroom, 11-bathroom mansion comes with upper and lower level master suites, a fitness room, an elevator, a sauna, a tennis court, a pool and spa, an outdoor kitchen, and a great view of Sand Key. The listing agent is Priscilla Pesce Charles Rutenberg Realty.

Alstott was a six-time Pro Bowler and played 12 season with the Bucs, including a Super Bowl run with the team in 2002. Alstott held

Tampa Bay’s Rinker House, which was built by a Florida cement tycoon A massive home built by the prominent Rinker Family,

St. Pete midcentury home designed by famed architect William B. Harvard The legacy of late Tampa Bay architect William B. Harvard Sr includes notable local buildings like the now demolished Inverted Pyramid Pier in St. Pete and the Hospitality House at Busch Gardens, and a residence he designed in 1954 was on the market in Allendale Terrace. Located at 801 37th Ave. N, the midcentury modern home was designed and built specifically for Harvard, and according to the listing the estate has stayed in the family ever since.

The 3,288-square-foot home includes four bedrooms and four bathrooms, as well as a den, an office, multiple entertaining spaces, cypress and mahogany paneling, an original George Nelson wall clock, original bathroom tiles, and a pool. Harvard, who died of cancer in 1995, was a founding partner of Harvard Jolly Clees Toppe Architects, and besides the Pier, his resume also includes quite a few iconic Tampa Bay buildings, like Derby Lane, the Federal Building in St. Petersburg, the Tides Hotel at Redington Beach, Pasadena Community Church, the St. Pete Beach Municipal Building, and the award-winning Municipal Pavilion and Bandstand in Williams Park, among others. Last June the home was asking $1.9 million, but is now off the market.

The

the team record for career TDs with 71, until that record was broken by Mike Evans in 2021. A-Train was inducted to the Buccaneers Ring of Honor in 2015, and is currently ranked No. 10 on the NFL Network’s “Top Ten Power Backs.” Alstott and his now ex-wife Nicole sold the home in 2012 for $1.9 million, but the estate is currently asking $4,999,000.

Coincidentally, the home is being sold by Eric Dungy, who besides being a realtor with Compass Florida, LLC, he is also the son of former Bucs head coach Tony Dungy.

St. Pete’s historic Rutland Estate The Rutland Estate, an iconic piece of St. Petersburg history, went back on the market for $8.5 million last January. Also known as the Rutland-Farley Mansion, the

whose concrete company arguably poured more cement than anyone in Florida’s history, went back on the market last October in Belleair.

Located at 140 Willadel Dr., the home was built in 1991 by the late Marshall Rinker Jr. and his wife Mary. Marshall’s father, Marshall E. “Doc’’ Rinker Sr, founded the concrete company Rinker Materials Corp. in 1926, and turned the one man, one truck operation into a half-billion dollar company with over 70 plants and work sites throughout Florida.

At its peak, the company was the largest cement company in the state, and in many ways helped usher in modern Florida as we know it, with a roster of clients that included shopping malls, condominiums and even Walt Disney World (they actually built Epcot) and multiple military bases.

South Tampa home of late cigar

tycoon Robert Franzblau A home built for a mail-order cigar pioneer was on the market last fall in South Tampa’s Culbreath Isles. Located at 1102 Culbreath Isles Dr., the home was finished in 1972 for Robert Franzblau, who purchased the once struggling Thompson Cigar Co. in 1960 and turned it into one of the largest mail-order cigar businesses in the U.S.

Shortly after the purchase, the United States imposed the Cuban Embargo, which prevented companies from importing Cuban cigars and tobacco. Franzblau, who was not a cigar smoker, moved the company’s cigar production to local Tampa factories like M&N Cigars and GradiazAnnis, which made cigars under the Thompson brand. A decade later, Franzblau shifted the the company’s focus to phone and catalog sales, where it thrived until 2018, when Scandinavian Tobacco Group purchased Thompson and Co. for a reported $62 million.

JAI LIFE: Someone bought the home of Cigar City Brewing founder Joey Redner.

TONY SICA PHOTOGRAPHY VIA ZILLOW

Despite former Mayor Bob Buckhorn declaring May 30, 2015 as “Thompson Cigar Company Day,” the company’s new owners closed the local outlet store and distribution center, laying off 112 employees, in a consolidation move in 2019. Franzblau passed away in September of 2021 at the age of 93.

The 4,343-square-foot home features four bedrooms and four bathrooms, as well as 133feet of canal frontage, a pool, an elevator, and some very, very vintage furnishings that should probably not be changed at all. The home that mail-order cigars built sold for $2,600,000 last October.

Seminole Heights house with two fresh water springs It’s estimated that Florida has around 700 springs, collectively delivering nearly 8 billion gallons of fresh, near 70-degree water to the surface every single day, and two of them are on the property of a house that was for sale in Tampa’s Seminole Heights neighborhood. Located at 1801 E Howell St., the 1,568-squarefoot home was built in 1985 and comes with three bedrooms and two bathrooms, as well as a wood burning fireplace, a fountain patio, a two-story Tuff shed, and more.

But arguably the best feature here are the two springs, which feed into a private pond, stocked with fish, says the listing. Florida springs come in a range of sizes from 1 to 8 magnitude, with 1 magnitude springs (like Weeki Wachee) putting out at least 64 million gallons of water daily, and 8 magnitude springs classified to just a small trickle. It’s unclear exactly what magnitude this spring is, but still, it’s rare to have a spring at all on your property, regardless of the magnitude. The duel-spring home sold for $515,000 last July.

Tampa’s first 3D-printed concrete home A home made almost entirely by a robot is now for sale in the Port Tampa neighborhood. Located at 7509 S Shamrock Rd., the home is currently in pre-construction and will be built by Tampabased startup Click, Print, Home (CPH-3D). Designed by San Francisco architect Keith Plymale, the home will be the first 3D-printed concrete home in Tampa, says CPH-3D.

Using zero wood for the structural elements of the home, the company partnered with Iowabased 3D printing outfit Alquist to use what’s called a COBOD “BOD 2” 3D concrete printer, which essentially layers “concrete ink” into the steel-enforced walls. “3D Concrete Printing (3DCP) also known as additive manufacturing, utilizes an automated process of seamlessly layering concrete via robotic arms and technology,” says the listing, “creating a solid, monolithic and impressive structure, while also minimizing waste up to 95%.”

As of now, CPH-3D homes come in either a one or two-story layout, but this particular one features 1,521-square-feet of living space, as well as three bedrooms and two bathrooms. It

also comes with 10-foot ceilings, a 12-foot glass pocket door in the dining room, hurricane windows throughout, and a curved guest bathroom, which according to the listing is “cylindrical and doubles as a safe-room in the house for tornadoes or other adverse conditions.”

The home is currently asking $599,300. This isn’t the first 3D-printed home in Florida, but the company says it’s the first luxury 3D-printed home in the state and just the second in the nation.

“This is a luxury housing product designed to shrug off Florida’s traditional housing adversaries- wind, water and termites,” says Matt Gibson, Founder and President of Click, Print, Home - 3D. “With the partnership with Alquist 3D, it will allow us to can maximize efficiencies, minimize waste and deliver a luxury product that is sustainable and most importantly, scalable. We are going to take this construction automation process to the next level and start printing subdivisions.”

is the hidden portal near the living room fireplace. Behind that secret door is a dark wooden bar in the style of a Prohibition-era speakeasy, featuring a 450-bottle wine fridge. The home is currently asking $2,375,000, and the listing is represented by Sarah Howe of Compass Florida.

YEAR IN REVIEW

The Tampa Bay mansion of former Jacksonville Jaguars president David Seldin A waterfront Tuscan farmhouse built by the guy who helped bring the Jaguars to Jacksonville is now on the market in Tierra Verde. Located at 1571 Oceanview Dr., the home was built in 2001 by Anzu Partners co-founder and investor David Seldin, who is arguably best known in Florida as the Jags president for the first five years of the franchise’s history, you know, when they were good.

Referred to as “Tre Sorelle,” which means three sisters in Italian, the 12,046-square-foot home was made with 10-12 inch thick limestone, which was container shipped from Italy, according to the listing. The seven-bedroom

at the University of Florida, the president of Burger King from 2001-2003, and the CEO of Northwest Airlines though most of the ‘90s.

The 3,732-square-foot home sits inside the Bayway Isles gated community, and comes with four bedrooms and four bathrooms, as well as a home theater with a wet bar, a pool, and dock and 15,000-pound boat lift. Notably, the home does come with an outdoor grill featuring a 500-gallon propane tank, for all the flame-broiled Whoppers you could ever want. The house built for a king is currently asking $2.35 million and the listing agent is Rhonda Sanderford of Coastal Properties Group.

The Tampa Bay home of Christian Television Network’s Bob D’Andrea Last spring, the home of a televangelist pioneer was on the market in Seminole, Florida. Located at 7360 137th St., the waterfront home was owned by Jane D’Andrea, wife of Christian Television Network (CTN) co-founder and president Robert “Bob” D’Andrea, who CTN said died earlier this year “after battling a non-COVID related illness.” According to property records, Bob D’Andrea purchased the home in 1996 for $502,000.

The 4,168-square-foot home is straight out of “The Righteous Gemstones” and comes with five bedrooms and five bathrooms, as well as a twostory atrium, an indoor hot tub, an indoor-outdoor pool, a heart-shaped spa, a pond, a dock and more.

Launched in October of 1979 from flagship channel WCLF in Largo, CTN is one of the oldest televangelist networks in the country, and over the years has featured programs like “Homekeepers Classics,” a show for the stayat-home wife or husband, “Man360,” a show for godly men, and “Set Free If You Want to Be,” a program for people wanting “to come out of the homosexual lifestyle and to those wanting to be set free from sexual bondage.” The D’Andrea home sold last May for $2 million.

St. Pete home in Historic Old Northeast with hidden speakeasy and Biggie Smallsthemed bathroom A fully redone St. Petersburg home with a secret boozy addition is now on the market in the Old Historic Old Northeast neighborhood. Located at 425 20th Ave NE, the 3,489-square-foot home was built in 1927, and is currently owned by former Cox Media Vice President Keith Lawless, who stepped down from the position last summer.

The five-bed, five-and-a-half bath house keeps quite of bit of its original charm, like the original hardwood floors and Augusta brick in the driveway, but now features some quality upgrades like designer finishes, Viking appliances, a pool and spa, a Notorious B.I.G.-themed bathroom, and more. But arguably the best thing about it

and 11-bathroom home also features a library, a wine cellar, a gym, an elevator, two offices, mahogany doors, a four-car garage, a fire pit surrounded by a moat, a geothermal-heated pool, and direct access to Shell Key, among other things. The home is currently asking $13,995,000, and the listing agent is Robyn Gunn of Premier Sotheby’s.

The St. Pete home of former Burger King president and UF board member John Dasburg Well, you can certainly “have it your way,” with this home currently on the market in St. Petersburg. Located at 4987 59th Ave. S, the home belongs to John H. Dasburg and his wife Mary Lou. Dasburg is currently the owner and CEO of Astar Cargo, but has an impressive resume that includes a stint as a board member

Former home of Tampa Bay beer distributing tycoon Tom Pepin A massive estate once owned by Tampa’s largest beer distributor is now on the market in Odessa. Located at 8511 Van Dyke Rd, the home sits on Keystone Lake and was formerly owned by Tom Pepin, CEO of Pepin Distributing Co., which was founded by his father in the late-1960s and has since become one of the state’s largest wholesalers of Anheuser-Busch.

Besides being known for beer, the Pepin name is also a familiar site around Tampa Bay, and claims the namesake of University of Tampa’s Pepin Stadium, Pepin Academies and the TPepin’s Hospitality Centre. According to property records, Pepin and his wife purchased the home in 2003 for $1,775,000 and sold it in 2015 for $3,133,200.

The 10,016-square-foot comes with five bedrooms and six bathrooms, as well as a whole house generator, a pool and cabana, a tennis court, beach volleyball courts with stadium lighting, a dock with dual three story waterslides, a boat lift, a float raft and more. The current asking price is $5.9 million.

TUSCANY VERDE: This Tierra Verde mansion was made with 10-12 inch thick limestone container shipped from Italy.

Jazz funeral

The end of ‘All Night Jazz’ among most read music stories of 2022.

By Ray Roa

This music section has always strived to highlight the best new, young acts both coming through Tampa Bay using the area as a home base, but our contributors have never shied away from the classics. Our readers love them, too, and while festivals, rappers and venue relocations were among Creative Loafing Tampa Bay’s most read music stories of 2022, so much of what readers flocked to included bands like The Eagles, The Who and Stevie Nicks. Most important of all, was the death of “All Night Jazz” on WUSF 89.7-FM. Here are the most read music stories of the last 12 months—get links to all of them via cltampa.com.

After 56 years, ‘All Night Jazz’ is dead on Tampa Bay’s WUSF 89.7-FM A 56-yearold staple of the Tampa music scene went to the grave on Halloween night when WUSF 89.7-FM pulled the plug on “All Night Jazz.” WUSF’s General Manager JoAnn Urofsky repeatedly gave canned answers in response to listeners and reporters. In the meantime WUSF jazz programming’s supposed new home “Arts Axis Florida” has posted to its Facebook page just over a dozen times since Oct. 31—with zero mentions of jazz.

Review: The Eagles give Tampa fans a three-hour set featuring ‘Hotel California’ and all the greatest hits A 20-minute intermission took place, and while members of the orchestra hung out backstage, Don, Joe, Tim, Vince, and Steuart launched into a breathtaking rendition of Steve Young’s “Seven Bridges Road,” a favorite of the Eagles’ for several years. Vince Gill did Glenn Frey’s vocals during “Take It Easy,” and whoever took on those high harmonies on “One Of These Nights” deserves a major pat on the back. Once the latter ended, Henley, now dressed much less conservatively, finally came to the mic and spoke. “It’s not that we don’t care about what’s going on in the world right now, it’s just that we need a break,” he explained. “Makes a fella want to drink.”

Review: The Who take Tampa fans through a lot of ups, and some downs, in return to Amalie Arena Visually perturbed, Roger Daltrey was obviously not happy. As sound issues were being sorted out, he and Townshend opted to shift gears and perform a two-man, sparse, acoustic version of the nugget “Naked

STEVE SPLANE

Eye.” Trading off verses, the arrival of this rarity, despite the circumstance that led to its unveiling, thrilled the diehards throughout the venue, no doubt including a patron near the front of the stage who’d apparently been screaming requested songs titles toward the band. “We don’t do requests” Townshend lashed, before softening his tone and adding “…but I love you. You paid for my Ferrari.”

‘Morally we cannot continue to stand by:’ Tampa’s Blended Festival is not going to happen Blended Festival had ambitious plans for a two-day music and wine festival last month in downtown Tampa’s Perry Harvey Sr. Park, but those plans never saw the light of day. “Morally, we cannot continue to stand by, and leave ticket holders in the dark,” a Nov. 2 post on Blended social media said. The post added that Blended Festival has been dissolved and that its founder, Sean Evans, CEO of Blended parent company My Wine Society has been absent since Oct. 1. Talking about putting out a Fyre.

Review: Stevie Nicks stupefies and hypnotizes in very sold-out return to Tampa “I

want you to know that I don’t know how hard that hurricane hit you, because I don’t live here, but we all worried. All over the world, we worried about you every day,” Stevie Nicks admitted to an almost brimful MidFlorida Credit Union Amphitheatre in late October. It goes without saying that against all odds, Tampa Bay got off fairly easy from Hurricane Ian. But even the 74-year-old Fleetwood Mac frontwoman knew that Ian is only a fraction of what made 2022 such a shitty year in the news.

Tampa’s MidFlorida Credit Union Amphitheatre now has a $199 lawn pass good for up to 40 concerts You know, because buying the damn things show by show can break the bank—especially when you pile on the fees.

Tampa Bay rapper Rod Wave will give away $25,000 of free gas in St. Pete Before his summertime arrest, St. Pete native Rod Wave was no stranger to charitable acts throughout

YEAR IN REVIEW

his hometown, and last April Wave posted a video on his Instagram account stating that he would give away $25,000 worth of free gas in his neighborhood.

Deadmau5, Lil Jon among headliners for Tampa Armature Works’ ‘XOXO Carnival’ Because people who drive Lamborghinis through Tampa Heights deserved Halloween treats, too. French producer DJ Snake, plus “It Wasn’t Me” singer Shaggy and Tampa Bay rock and soul

band the Black Honkeys were also on the bill for the event by Pied Piper Productions which staged a Halloween carnival last fall, features family-friendly daytime activities including classic carnival rides, vendors, plus modern art installations. You can now add “EDM destination” to Armature Works’ resume.

Jack White, Machine Gun Kelly will headline Tampa’s 97X Next Big Thing Even without a home on the FM dial, 97X still made big waves this year, thanks in part to Megan Fox’s boyfriend and the pale prince of Third Man Records. This year’s NBT marked the first time Jack White—who just played Orlando—rocked Tampa as a solo artist, and his first gig here since his days with The White Stripes.

Kenny Chesney played a surprise free show at a 300-capacity Tampa venue Because of his work with the National Independent Venue Association, which successfully lobbied for billions of dollars to save live entertainment in the wake of the pandemic, Crowbar owner Tom DeGeorge made his venue a destination. Case in point, Kenny Chesney fans got a surprise dose of the good stuff in April when the country superstar showed up to play with Old Dominion, which was warming up for its set opening for the Ches at Raymond James.

Q&A: Before Clearwater concert, Former Yes frontman Jon Anderson says his old band’s new album is ‘not my cup of tea’ The 77-year-old Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee was diagnosed with acute respiratory failure in 2008, right before Yes’ 40th anniversary tour, and had to be replaced—at the time, temporarily—by Benoît David. As it turned out, original members Chris Squire, Steve Howe, and Alan White liked working with David so much, they basically kept him onboard and never asked Jon to rejoin.

After 20 years in Ybor City, Tampa’s iconic venue The Orpheum is moving out We soon learned that Orpheum had found a new home in North Tampa, but the 700-plus capacity venue’s spot has been on Seventh Avenue since 2011 after it moved from its original location at the corner of 8th St. and Avenida Republica de Cuba. Over the course of 20 years, Orpheum’s Ybor locations hosted thousands of bands in both its venues, including The Killers who played a last-minute set there in November 2019. Ybor is now without a venue to accommodate shows too big for Crowbar (under 400 capacity) and too small for The Ritz (1,100 plus).

BLUE NOTES: The end of 89.7-FM’s ‘All Night Jazz’—where La Lucha and Chuck Redd played in 2019—was abrupt and unceremonious.

Florida Strawberry Festival’s lineup now includes Ludacris, The Jacksons and more As previously announced, other major headliners include Willie Nelson, Tanya Tucker, Lynyrd Skynyrd and Train. This popular story is great because you can still do something about it since the festival doesn’t kick off its musical lineup until Thursday, March 2.

Review: Billy Joel salutes Kiev and gets snarky during chilly Orlando show “Good evening, Alaska!” Billy Joel called out to a freezing cold crowd at Orlando’s Camping World Stadium. “What the hell’s going on?!” It’s been a hot minute since the Piano Man performed in an outdoor venue in Florida. During the summer, it’s too hot for that shit, and when he takes on his biannual performance at Tampa’s Amalie Arena at the beginning of even numbered years—excluding 2022—it’s still too cold. But a stadium show during mid-March in Florida? What could possibly go wrong? The weather, apparently.

Smashing Pumpkins’ Billy Corgan stops by Seminole Heights Microgroove, leaves with a ‘nice stack’ of vinyl Before headlining Amalie Arena with Jane’s Addiction in October, frontman Billy Corgan made some time to go record shopping before the gig. “He shopped the whole store, man, A-Z,” Keith Ulrey, founder and owner of Seminole Heights record store Microgroove, told CL. Corgan spent a couple hundred dollars during the 30-minute trip. In the haul was lots of ‘70s soft-rock and pop, some Glen Campbell, Canned Heat and even a record by Rhode Island ‘60s and ‘70s harmony-driven family band The Cowsills.

YEAR IN REVIEW

Wu-Tang icon GZA will play chess against fans in Dunedin Though he’s famously been a huge chess fan is whole life, the legendary emcee has been on a bit of a chess run as of late, battling fans in various cities across the country. He did it again in September ahead of the Wu’s show in Tampa.

Imagine Dragons, Dave Matthews Band among headliners for Tampa’s Innings Festival 2023 Before his festival even opened for the first time in Tampa, Innings founder Tim Sweetwood had plans to come back. “We can already say that we’ll be giving it a go again in ‘23,” he told CL. The lineup says Tampa’s changing guys, or you could say it hasn’t changed at all. The festival—happening March 18-19—also includes Weezer, Pitbull, The Avett Brothers, Marcus Mumford, Third Eye Blind, Japanese Breakfast and more.

Ybor City’s Honey Pot nightclub has reopened as PTL In July, a year after Honey Pot announced its closure in Ybor City, new life came to the club parked at 1507 E 7th Ave.

LIQUID SWORDS: GZA battled Dunedin fans in September.

By Ray Roa C CL Recommends

THU 29

A Drag Queen Christmas: Nina West/ more A video of conservative protestors whining about drag queens Nina West and Trinity Taylor’s Christmas tour in front of the Ace Hotel Theatre in Los Angeles recently surfaced on TikTok. But West—who portrayed Divine in “Weird: The Al Yankovic Story”—is the furthest thing from the groomer that anti-LGBTQ+ activists make her out to be (and to be honest, the groomer fear-mongering is straight up bullshit). Slaying alongside West and Taylor will be Alyssa Edwards and Brooke Lynn Hytes. What’s not to scream “yasss” about? (Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater)—Josh Bradley

Elevate Thursday: Sidetrakd x JDub

Tampa Armature Works’ M. Bird already has what’s arguably the best view of the Hillsborough River and downtown Tampa, but on Thursdays it’s got some of the best EDM in town, too. This week Side Trakd—who likes to spin house, funk & drum and bass, including originals—headlines the Thursday weekly. (M. Bird, Tampa)

The Grapes w/The Grecian Urns/ Chaunces/Philip Charos If you’re a local supporter of the Bay area indie-rock scene, then this one’s easily a contender for show of the year. Headlining is The Grapes, whose lineup has recently been made whole just in time to celebrate the 10-year anniversary of its masterpiece debut full-length Hemispheres where the band introduced the Bay area to the cutting self-introspection of frontman Alexander Charos and deep musicality of his band. Also on the bill, however, is a reunion for The Grecian Urns, who put out one of the greatest Tampa Bay indie-pop releases of all time when it gave us Lovedream in 2010. At the time, since-shuttered Reax music magazine called it “a 45-minute, harmony drenched, folk-pop jewel that glistens with touching songs about family (“Summer Salt”), chasing freedom (“The Waitress”), and what it means to live and love amongst the Spanish moss and sweltering heat of the Sunshine State (“Indian River”).” The Urns have been practicing for a few days leading up to this gig where the next generation of local pop wunderkinds (read: Chaunces) opens along with a solo set from Grapes drummer Philip Charos. (Floridian Social Club, St. Petersburg)

Have Gun, Will Travel On the heels of a new EP that dropped in September, local alt-rock favorites Have Gun, Will Travel is set to perform its final gig of the year on Thursday. Another

EP is set to drop sometime in 2023, and we can imagine that a good chunk of it has been completed, so don’t be shocked if the Burke brothers give you a New Year’s surprise and debut a few previews. In the meantime, enjoy the breeze and tunes at this free gig, but warm up with the band’s new video for “Our Fair City,” which is Have Gun, Will Travel’s love letter to its hometown of Bradenton. (The Ale and the Witch, St. Petersburg)

Magic City Hippies w/Cannibal Kids

Almost a year to the date after performing at the now-shuttered Orpheum in Ybor City, Miami-based psych-funk trio Magic City Hippies is once again ending its year in its home state. Before spending New Year’s Eve at the Miami Beach Bandshell, the boys— playing their first local show since release a new album, Water Your Garden —kick off their Florida stay at Orpheum’s new North Tampa outpost, alongside opener Cannibal Kids. (Orpheum, Tampa)—JB

FRI 30

Physical Plant w/Blonde Gentlemen

Some kids get lost in their parents’ records collections, then grow up to pick up instruments and channel all that influence into their own bands. Physical Plant falls into

continued on page 48

Dynasty

that camp, and says, “Songwriters Caegan Quimby and Josh Scheible were placed in suspended animation in 1976 and were revived to write new deep cuts for classic rock radio.” The band’s output is for fans of the best new rock and roll (White Denim), the funk and jam scene (Vulfpeck) and even Steely Dan, Yes and The Band, all listed as influences on the outfit. (Hooch and Hive, Tampa)

Singers+Songs: June Bunch w/ Will Quinlan/Deb Ruby/Jeff Brawer/ Jack Sprouse On his latest single, “Blind Leads Blind (All the Light We Can’t See),” Tampa songwriter Will Quinlan continues to frolic through melancholy meditations about the quiet moments of self-doubt we experience on the lonely drive home. The cut, Quinlan’s first bit of new music since a 2021 tune “Texarkana,” is an alternate take from a forthcoming solo album, Articles Of Redemption due next summer, and will please fans of Counting Crows and Jason Molina. Expect Quinlan to play the tune, and hopefully tease more new stuff at this songwriter showcase. (Music Hall at New World Brewery, Tampa)

SAT 31

3Lau w/Brody Jenner You probably can’t have “Sex With Brody” on NYE, but the reality TV star is hosting a poolside party where Justin David Blau (aka 3Lau) spins house, dubstep and more. If Blau’s tastes are a little too domestic for your EDM needs, Italian DJ and producer Benny Benassi is a short trip down I-275 away, spinning at The Ritz Ybor’s New Year’s party. (WTR, Tampa)

Chlorinefields w/Ortrotasce/13%/ Afterworld One of the local rock scene’s greatest gifts of 2022 is Chlorinefields. Creative Loafing Tampa Bay contributor Arielle Stevenson described the band’s sound “like the Cocteau Twins but sludgier, dirtier, sadder.” The lineup includes Nic Hamersly on guitar, synth, and arrangements—and this show finds Hamersly also bringing his analog EBM project Ortrotasce to the stage. Riley Morgan—an alum of the since-shuttered Roser House DIY space, former multi-instrumentalist for Pinellas psych-rock giant Pleasures—is on the docket under the 13% moniker, as is CL Staff Writer Justin Garcia who brings his Afterworld project to open the pay-what-you-can affair. (The Nest at St. Pete Brewing Company, St. Petersburg)

Codes w/Hot Pot/Loudfi There’s not even an address for this warehouse rave happening somewhere in between Tampa International Airport and Raymond James Stadium (promoter @funguypresents said it will share the exact location 24 hours ahead of showtime). Ritz Ybor mainstay Codes headlines, and cover ($55) includes allyou-can drink since there will be no cash or currency accepted at the bar (except for tips, of course).

Dynasty & Friends One of Tampa’s all-time greatest hip-hop exports, Dynasty, returns to the real Bay area for New Years Eve where she takes to one of Tampa’s most gorgeous settings—Straz Center’s

Lettuce Lettuce’s discography reads like a new year manifestation word cloud: Rage!, Crush , Elevate , Resonate , and even Outta Here . Expect the Boston jam-scene favorite to run through the lot of its output at this end-of-year gig that’ll please fans of funk, disco, rock, psychedelia and even hip-hop and go-go. (Jannus Live, St. Petersburg)

Moisturizer w/Thorn/Shining Wizard/ Sloth feat. Black Mayonnaise For those who want their ears to bleed as they enter 2023, Born Free welcomes Rhode Island grindcore outfit Moisturizer, ready to send local fans of speed metal and punk into the new year with one hell of an Interstellar Migraine . Support on the bill includes Tampa metal trio Thorn, fresh off the release of a brutalizing nine-track, 10-minute new selftitled album. (Born Free Pub & Grill)

SUN 01

Dumb Blind Luck If eating healthy is one of your resolutions, then you might want to be in Town ‘n Country on New Years Day since Sweetwater Organic Community Farm is open and also hosting Tampa band Dumb Blind Luck, which plays a blend of Americana, blues, R&B and jazz. (Sweetwater Organic Community Farm, Tampa)

New Year’s Day Hangover Brunch:

The Burke Bros. w/Rebekah Pulley

In a new video for “Our Fair City,” longrunning Bay area Americana favorite Have Gun, Will Travel pays tribute to its hometown, Bradenton, where officials gave the band a key to the city a year ago. HGWT’s roots run deep; frontman Matt Burke and his brother, bassist Danny Burke, plus keyboardist Ed Stork were born there. Like every city in Florida these days, the town has gone through changes. “I’ve always had a bit of a love/hate thing with my hometown. But definitely more love than hate. I’ve tried to express these sentiments in our songs over the years,” Matt told CL. But when the pandemic hit, he reached out to the Realize Bradenton nonprofit which asked him to write an uplifting song about

the neighborhood. The cut made it into a local campaign, and ended up on HGWT’s new EP, Silver Sounds . The band’s longtime collaborator Ryan Seybold helped the video—where the band cruises around Bradenton in a classic Rambler convertible—come to life, and you can catch the vibe when the Burke Brothers play Ella’s annual Jan. 1 brunch. There’s no cover, but reservations are recommended. (Ella’s Americana Folk Art Cafe, Tampa)

THU 05

Rock The Park: Ashley Smith & The Random Occurrence w/Josh Gluck/ Slopfunkdust Downtown Tampa’s free monthly concert series comes into the new year swinging. Powerhouse Americana-blues and pop songwriter Ashley Smith headlines along with her band The Random Occurrence (collectively known as “Astro”). Browardbased songwriter Josh Gluck (his “To The Light” single would play well for the blues lovers at Skipper’s Smokehouse) rocks the middle of the lineup anchored by Tampa beat fanatic and hip-hop scene mainstay Slopfunkdust. (Curtis Hixon Waterfront Park, Tampa)

Riverwalk stage—alongside singers J’Nelle & Trumaine Lamar who’ll complement the hard-hitting, hypnotizingly rhythmic raps from Dynasty, who moved to Los Angeles in 2018. DJ Sandman rocks the ones and twos in between sets. (Riverwalk Stage at Straz Center for the Performing Arts, Tampa)

Ashley Smith & the Random Occurrence

MARLO MILLER C/O GASPARILLA MUSIC FESTIVAL

If you miss the old State Theatre, you might want to check out the schedule at 687 Central Ave. as of late. Tennessee Americana favorite Lucero recently confirmed a return to the address, and Drive-By Truckers also now has plans to play the space this spring.

Tickets to see the Truckers at what’s now known as Floridian Social in St. Petersburg on Thursday, April 20 at 7 p.m. go on sale to the public on Friday, Dec. 9 at 10 a.m. and start at $38. Lydia Loveless opens the show. Other Florida stops on the tour include Fort Lauderdale and Orlando

The Truckers’ Patterson Hood just played two solo shows in Ybor City last month, but this stop find his Athens, Georgia rock and roll band on tour in support of a new album, Welcome 2 Club VIII , which plays like a tip of the cap to the band’s honky-tonkin, Muscle Shoals origin. The album features guest spots from the likes of R.E.M.’s Mike Mills, Margo Price and even Mississippi-bred songwriter Schaefer Llana (who played St. Pete in 2018).

Suicide Commandow/00tz 00tz Friday, March 31. 7 p.m. $25. Orpheum, Tampa

Free Throw w/Can’t Swim/Heart to Gold/Early Humans Sunday, April 2. 6 p.m. $20. Orpheum, Tampa

jxdn w/Beauty School Dropout Monday, April 3. 7 p.m. $24.50. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

Umphrey’s McGee Thursday, April 13. 8 p.m. $35. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

Masego Friday, April 14. 7 p.m. $27.50 & up. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

The Toasters w/TBA Friday, April 14. 6 p.m. $17. Brass Mug, Tampa

Molchat Doma w/Nuovo Testamento Saturday, April 15. 8 p.m. $29.50. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

Find me at the bar drinking a Tecate and shooting cheap tequila, and thinking about all the shows that’ve passed through the former bank, which turned into a venue in 1991 before going on the market in 2018. Kevin Chadwick bought the building soon after that and spent two years doing an exhaustive rehab before reopening as the Floridian Social Club (which has since shortened its name ever so slightly).

The Truckers booking comes ahead of a push by Floridian Social’s talent buyer Shawn Kyle to start booking”#statetheatresundays” at the venue, which was once known as a somewhat grimy, but cozy and near perfect place to catch shows. On Instagram, Kyle said the new concert series will highlight local, regional and community sounds, including indie, punk, alt, hip-hop, metal, DIY and beyond inside “the room that was the center of many of those scenes for decades for so many of us.”

Kyle asked anyone interested in getting involved to DM him via @thelaurelcanyon on Instagram. See Josh Bradley’s final weekly new concert roundup of 2022 below.—Ray Roa

Queensryche w/Trauma/Marty Friedman Sunday, April 16. 7:30 p.m. $27.50. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

Billy Strings Tuesday, April 18. 8 p.m. Sold out. Yuengling Center, Tampa

Chase Rice w/Read Southall Band Friday, April 28. 7 p.m. $30.50. Jannus Live, St. Petersburg

New Edition w/Keith Sweat/Guy/Tank Sunday, April 30. 7 p.m. $59.50 & up. Amalie Arena, Tampa

Morgan Wallen w/Ernest/Bailey Zimmerman Saturday, May 6. 7 p.m. Sold out. Midflorida Credit Union Amphitheatre, Tampa

The Turtles w/Little Anthony/more Wednesday, May 31. 7 p.m. $40-$75. Ruth Eckerd Hall, Clearwater

BRANTLEY GUTIERREZ

See yule later

By Caroline DeBruhl

Dear Oracle, as new parents, we’re excited to spend the holidays with our families and our baby. However, some holiday traditions (like long car rides) are difficult for our new family. How can I approach changing things up without hurting anyone’s feelings?—Walking Through A Winter Worryland

Cards: The Chariot, Seven of Pentacles, Three of Swords, Ten of Wands (reversed)

Dear Winter Worryland, let’s start with the bad news first: no matter what you say or how delicately you approach this situation, some of your family members will be upset. People are going to want to see that new baby and keep up with their traditions, logistics be damned. The Three of Swords is a card of disappointments, and paired with the burdensome Ten of Wands reversed, you may need to steel yourself for uncomfortable conversations where people have hurt feelings. Of course, I encourage you to be tactful—disappointment is because they want to see you, not because they’re dicks—but feelings are going to be hurt, and there’s not much you can do about it.

The good news is that it’s worth having these conversations. As a new family, you’re actually in the position to start setting up your own traditions. The Seven of Pentacles is a card of both reflection and investment. What holiday traditions do you like? Are there any new traditions you want to try? Maybe you’ve always wanted to do a spirited reading of “A Christmas Carol” or maybe do a Maccabee-themed D&D campaign to defeat the Greeks for the first night of Hanukkah. Or perhaps you want to swap out the holiday dinner for a holiday brunch (babies and new parents have early bedtimes!)

Whatever it is, make your choice and go forth with confidence. The Chariot is here to help you plow through obstacles (like unintentional/intentional guilt trips) and will set you on the path to victory. The Chariot’s confidence is also influential—it’ll encourage people to hop on and go for the ride. So while people may hold onto their traditions tightly, they might follow your lead and let things slide, especially if it means seeing a cute baby.

It’s never fun to have awkward conversations (or potential fights) around the holidays, but you have to do this for your sanity and your family. Things will smooth out, I promise.

And if all else fails, dress your baby up in various holiday-themed costumes and send photos to everyone pitching sull. They can’t be mad while looking at a baby dressed like an itty bitty reindeer. Best of luck, my dear!

Dear Oracle, every year my office does a secret Santa for our holiday party. Every year, the majority of the staff buys gifts for everyone. It

seems nice, but I feel like this pressures other people to spend more money on everyone and defeats the point. Should I cancel Secret Santa? Enforce a strict one-person-gift-giving policy? Seriously, Not A Scrooge

Cards: Three of Pentacles, Judgment, King of Cups

Dear Non-Scrooge, if your employees want to give everyone gifts, they’re going to regardless of the official policy. Some people are just generous (or compulsive), so I doubt a formal rule will curtail that. However, consider taking a different approach this year.

the same place—but by changing the dynamic from individual gift-givers to collective giftreceivers, it puts everyone on the same level. The workers are no longer guests but guests of honor. It’s their party!

As the King of Cups, I know you want to do right by your employees. I think it’s wise to take the pressure off people who might not want to buy gifts for their coworkers but also turn a blind eye to those that do. (As long as gifts are appropriate/not harassment in disguise.)

(But for God’s sake, whatever you do, don’t do an office White Elephant. Nobody wants to be surrounded by coworkers and end up clutching a Santa suit penis sock.)

Dear Oracle, if I wanted to do something kind of witchy this yuletide season, what should I do?—Yuletide Spirit

ORACLE OF YBOR

If you’re lucky enough to give bonuses, maybe do that at the holiday party. The Three of Pentacles is a recognition of work and artistry; paired with Judgment, a card of all-isoneness, it might be nice for you to use the party to recognize everyone’s hard work.

Will some people still show up with gifts for everyone? Probably—you are all gathered in

However you do it (bonuses, dinner, whatever), make sure it’s done with intention. The Judgment card is also one of understanding, so you want your employees to feel seen and valued. Putting in a year of hard work to get no formal recognition beyond a $20 gift card doesn’t make an employee feel particularly cherished.

At the party, you could give a small speech where you personally thank people (by name and deed) for all they’ve done. If public speaking is not your thing, a card with a thoughtful note might do the trick. However you go about it, let your employees know that you cherish them and couldn’t have done it without them.

Dear Yuletide, if you’re looking for a subtle spell, you can make a Yule log. You would take a log of firewood and after doing your cleansing of choice, adorn it. You can tie cotton ribbon to it, add sprigs of fir or holly, and write/draw symbols of what you wish for in the new year or just what you’re grateful for. Then on the solstice, burn it. If you don’t have access to a fire pit/fireplace, you could always bake a Yule Log (Bûche De Noël) and decorate it with edible things (fresh cranberries, rosemary) and write your intentions under/with frosting and enjoy.

Yuletide is still a time for gathering so you can also do either of the above as a group activity—or simply throw a winter party on the 21st and rejoice in the return of the sun. Happy holidays, y’all!

Send your questions to oracle@cltampa.com or DM @theyboracle on Instagram.

SIMON MOUTON/ADOBE

Getting it

By Dan Savage

When I first got engaged to my wife, I tried to ease into a conversation about cuckolding, but it went poorly. I tried to broach the subject by telling her monogamy wasn’t a requirement for me and she got upset. She thought I wanted to have sex with other women. I do not. I reassured her of that fact and dropped the subject, but she still doesn’t believe me. Whenever she’s feeling insecure, she brings up that conversation from five years ago. I don’t know you at all and this is anonymous, so I have no reason to lie: I do not want to have sex with women other than my wife. I want her to have sex with other men. I want to be her cuckold. I want her to cheat on me. I have seen some married men online who are living the life I dream about (if the stuff they post about being cuckolds is true). I get depressed knowing some men have what I want. How did they get it? How do I get it? Do I risk raising the subject of monogamy again?—Difficulties Renegotiating Expectations Around Monogamy

cuckold relationships—when you beat off looking at their accounts—you need to remember that you’re seeing their most recent posts first. Meaning, you’re seeing where they arrived, DREAM, and not where they started.

SAVAGE LOVE

Zooming in… you brought up non-monogamy, not cuckolding, and somehow thought your wife would take you from zero to 60, i.e., you thought your wife would hear you say “nonmonogamy” and instead of thinking what most people would when their partner broached the subject of non-monogamy (“He wants to fuck other people!”), DREAM, you hoped your wife would either react so positively you felt you could pivot to your non-monogamy-adjacent kink (“I want you to fuck other people!”) or even that she might leap to the opposite of the likeliest conclusion (“He wants me to fuck other people!?!”). And that is 1. not how it works and 2. not how you get what you want.

I got on Twitter—perhaps for the last time— to track down one of the guys you mentioned, DREAM, i.e., one of the guys living the life you dream about and posting the proof all over his social media accounts. His handle on Twitter is @cycliccycle, DREAM, his wife’s handle is @ miss_on_top. He managed to get what you want. So, how did he get it? And how can you?

“The short answer: With a lot of communication, literature, podcasts, and patience,” said Cycle.

Cycle was never a jealous person. If anything, he was the opposite of jealous. “Even before cuckolding was integrated into my mental lexicon,” said Cycle, “things like other guys hitting on my girlfriend or buying her drinks were huge turn-ons for me.”

Eventually Cycle met the woman who would become his wife, and while they enjoyed a varied and pretty kinky sex life, cuckolding wasn’t always a part of it. But when Cycle decided to broach the subject, DREAM, he was honest and direct—in other words, DREAM, he didn’t make the mistake you did. He didn’t speak about nonmonogamy generally, but about his emerging interest in cuckolding specifically. He didn’t ease into the conversation, he jumped in.

“Now, it wasn’t a massive stretch to get to cuckolding from our already kinky lifestyle,” said Cycle. “And while I think it helped that we approached the topic more from a kink perspective than a non-monogamous perspective at first, even then we also didn’t go from zero to 60 in an instant.”

Zooming out… when you look at the social media accounts of guys who are in successful

“I recall discussing with my wife that we could make up our own rules, and build our own a la cart dynamic,” said Cycle, “which made her feel much more comfortable. It also didn’t hurt that chastity was already part of our kink repertoire. We eventually progressed to a more traditional FLR/Cuckolding dynamic, but we allowed it time to develop organically.” (FLR = “female-led relationship.”)

Cycle’s wife had a lot of reservations about opening up their relationship, DREAM, even though they were only opening things up—per Cycle’s desires—on her side. So, they started out slow with a lot of fantasy play and dirty talk before moving on to low-stakes/light-hearted/ baby-step “first dates” with other men. Only after they both felt comfortable with the cuckold dynamic in theory did the move on to cuckolding—Cycle’s wife having sex with other men—in actual practice.

And it wasn’t just about what Cycle wanted for himself, DREAM, but about what Cycle wanted for his wife and, more importantly, about what his wife wanted for herself.

“When my wife and I first started dating I had already had significantly more partners,” said Cycle. “So, one of the most genuine things I wanted for my wife was for her to have more experiences with other partners. Suffice to say, cuckolding for us, is much more about fulfilling her wants, needs, and desires.”

My partner and I have known each other for 10 years. We fell madly in love, had a rich erotic and sexual relationship, and have explored ethical non-monogamy together. In the past year there was a shift—a lessening of passion that I mistakenly attributed to a lack of desire for me. Then

my wife started seeing a therapist, which subsequently brought her Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) to the surface. Previously she was able to keep it hidden; she only occasionally let on that she was unhappy with herself. We had been seeing a therapist together to discuss the ENM aspect of our relationship, but she asked me not to bring her BDD into these sessions. Recently, she decided it was too painful to continue. We have had two private conversations about it, and in the last one she took PIV off the table. Being seen or touched naked is just too painful/shameful for her. In-depth relationship communication is not a strength for us—based partly on the shame, pain, and guilt over this disorder, as well as other cumulative traumas from her past. We love each other very much and I have committed to being a strong and supportive partner. Based on this limited information, Dan, can you offer suggestions to help me manage this challenge? I don’t want to make things worse or create more problems, but I want my lover back.—Lamenting Over Sorrowful

Times

You haven’t lost your lover. She’s still in your life and you’re still having some kind of sex—I mean, I assume you’re still having some kind of sex. You specifically mention your partner taking PIV off the table, LOST, along with… well, along with any other kind of sexual contact that requires her to be seen and/or touched naked, which wouldn’t leave a lot on the table. But I have to assume something was left on the table, LOST, however meagre, otherwise you would’ve said your partner cut off all sexual contact. But you didn’t say that… so I’m going to assume that hasn’t happened… at least not yet.

Your partner clearly has a lot of work to do in therapy, LOST, and you can be supportive while also being clear about your own needs/ expectations/hopes for your future together… a future where you hope to reconnect sexually. If your partner isn’t comfortable talking about your reasonable needs/expectations/hopes in any

depth—or if she experiences your reasonable needs/expectations/hopes as coercive—taking a break from your relationship while she does the work may be in her own best interests.

Why—why, why, why—do young cis gay dudes insist on calling their assholes “cunts” and “pussies” these days? I heard you talking about this on your podcast. As a woman with an actual vagina, I find this incredibly offensive and want it to STOP.—Your Assholes NOT Of Pussies’ Equal

Back when I was a young cis gay dude, YANOPE, most young cis gay dudes objected— vociferously—to any suggestion that their assholes resembled, in form or function, women’s pussies. And most didn’t want their assholes associated with female genitalia because they thought lady parts were disgusting and, even worse, they didn’t care who knew it. Now, young gay men are much better about vulvas and vaginas—some even fuck/ date/marry other gay and bi men who have vulvas and vaginas—and they don’t care who knows it. So, what I’m basically saying here, YANOPE, is pick your poison: cis gay dudes who think pussy is icky and gross and will angrily reject any comparison/association or cis gay dudes who think pussy is powerful and amazing and will happily make the comparison/association themselves. The choice seems obvious to me.

P.S. It has been my experience—ahem—that younger gay men mostly do the thing you’re complaining about during sex. They don’t do it during Zoom meetings or when they’re having dinner with their lesbian pals. So, I don’t see how this impacts you. Even if it did, YANOPE, you can’t control what other people say during sex—with the exception of people you’re having sex with—and attempting to dictate terms is a waste of time.

Send your burning questions to mailbox@ savage.love. Podcasts, columns and more at savage.love!

ACROSS

Chess tactic, for short

Broadsided

Magna cum

In ___ (confused)

New self-image book subtitled “How To Vacuum the Crud Out of Your Head”?

Ferber et al.

Revelation on an Italian soap opera?

Name in coaching lore

Computer’s “keep” option

Boring event

With 50 Across, the least ordered dish at Quasimodo’s Restaurant?

Risk a long nose

“Unfortunately ...”

Iowa field find

72 With 84 Across, a 1966 song by the Kinks about Mussolini? 77 Clothes line? 80 Cockpit concern: abbr. 81 Was ahead 82 Curved molding 83 “Equal” opening 84 See 72 Across 87 Course number 88 Regarding 89 Mr. Geller 90 Beta Kappa starter 91 With 102 Across, something Jimmy Carter probably never said at the Camp David talks in 1978? 97 Letter feature 99 Soprano Renata 100 Manhattan’s Columbus, for one: abbr. 101 Singer Ed 102 See 91 Across 108 Mrs. Gorbachev 110 Actor Brazzi 111 What a person about to eat fish eggs might be thinking?

One more time 120 “Be with you shortly”

Answer to “Want some lemonade, mister?”

On edge 123 Lugosi et al.

Springsteen

QB’s pass try

Hollywood legend West

U.K. honour

Deciduous tree

When the flakes show up: abbr.

Singer Rimes

Tennis star Kournikova

Complete agreement

Oxford official

Like Bacon or Lamb: abbr.

Tacks, at sea

“The bool”

Helen of Troy’s mom

Moon landers

Anthem start

Yeltsin declared it dead in ’91

Unrefined

Egg starter

Permit

Morse sounds

Pile inventor

Ovine sign

Lewd looks

Emulate Betsy Ross

Shocked reactions

Alaskan island language

1971 postapocalyptic teen romance film, Glen and ___

Actor Carroll

Foe of the Clantons

H.G. Wells’s blond race

Woody’s Interiors, for one

Get out, on a computer: abbr.

The Make ___ Foundation

Remainder, to René

Forster’s ___ With a View

69 octupled

A possessive

Latté feature

Hairy male in a fairy tale

Big bandleader

Actor Zimbalist Jr.

Burning

Tanning lotion abbr.

The Wolverines’ U.

74 Down, for one: abbr.

Land

Garden tool

Catchall abbr. 94 ___ crossroad 95 Sgts. et al.

Sets one’s sights on 98 Where Mount Carmel is

Remain 102 ___ one’s time 103 Gomer’s grp. 104 Number of Satie’s gymnopédies 105 Some Yale students in 1969 106 Silly 107 Loud 109 Handle, in Latin 111 Throng 112 Compass pt. 113 Tilt-nose jet 114 “What?” 115 Lionel Richie hit, “You ___” 116 Coming-out person 117 Bringing Up Baby studio 119 Born

PUZZLEFANS! Forinfo on Merl's Sunday crossword anthologies, visit www.sunday crosswords.com.

One way to organize diners at a dessert bar?

Storm center DOWN

Cusser’s Hill

Sun-dried brick

Lakeside abode

Tired, in baby talk?

Rodeo need

Scare a little

TV E.T.

The Jetsons’ dog

Conked out

Complete

Torrent

Worked at, as a trade