WELLNESS That time I was the daughter Karen Copan

by Karen Kopan That Time I was the Daughter

I thought it was odd that my Mom would be calling me on a Friday night after 10:00pm. Especially since I was out of town on a retreat, quite a bit north of Chicago near the Wisconsin border. I remember my clothing still smelled like the beach campfire when I got back to my room to shower. That’s when the call came. “Karen, Dad collapsed on the floor in the kitchen, here, talk to the fireman…”.

My Mom handed the phone to the paramedic that helped revive my Dad. I remember hearing “down for at least 12 minutes” and “we’re doing everything we can” and “we’ll take her with us to the hospital”. I can’t describe the emotions I felt when I arrived in the Emergency Department and found my Mom sitting all alone with a dazed look on her face, staring at the floor. Nor can I describe the emotions I felt as I slowly walked up to my Dad’s cart, my heart racing. He didn’t open his eyes. He didn’t move, except for his chest rising and falling with the ventilator breaths and he hadn’t received any sedation or narcotics. Dad? Dad, can Iopen your eyes? Dad, can Ihear me? I knew this wasn’t good, but I wasn’t functioning in my usual role as a Nurse Practitioner. I wasn’t thinking. I was numb. This time I was the daughter.

We left at 3:30 in the morning and were back only a few hours later. My Dad was having seizures. We were told the tests they ran to assess his brain function basically said he would never again be the man we knew and loved. After a call to my brother and discussions with the chaplain and a priest, we knew what we wanted to do. Even with all my professional experience, nothing could prepare me for what I felt now, as the daughter. Thankfully, we had many discussions as a family about this type of situation and we were all in agreement that my Dad would want the ventilator discontinued so he could die naturally. He had already died that night in the kitchen, although his heart was revived, and everyone tried their best, his brain would never be the same. It was time to let him go. And we did.

I am so grateful that we were 100% certain of our decision, because it really was my Dad’s decision. He told us when we had open conversations about death and dying. I can’t even imagine if our family had to debate the options or had disagreements between us or felt completely lost as to what to do. As his daughter I knew we spoke for my Dad. We said what he couldn’t in the moment. Take the time to have these talks with your family and close friends, before Iget the call.

“I don’t believe in goodbye, but I believe in letting go.” -Anonymous

Karen Kopan, the owner of Intensive Karen, has over 30 years of ICU experience as a medical professional and has guided tens of thousands of families in making difficult life and death decisions. If Ior someone Ilove doesn’t have their wishes understood and well documented, and would like additional information or a complimentary consultation.

email me at karen@intensivekaren.com or (847) 901-3888.

Summer ServiceS for HigH ScHool TeenS

Yellowbrick is pleased to announce summer services for high school teenagers, designed to address mental health needs, with

the capacity to integrate educational needs. Services are highly individualized based on an initial assessment and can begin at any time. They range from a limited package of outpatient psychotherapy and psychiatry to a daily Intensive Outpatient Program. The Adolescent Summer Program is designed so that services can be matched to mental health, educational and scheduling needs. Available services include:

• Intensive psychotherapy and psychiatric services • Family therapy • Ongoing parent support and consultation available around the clock • Cognitively based skills development, including MBSR, DBT, Open

DBT, ACT, CBT • Emotion regulation through sensorimotor mind-body integration • Educational support, including tutoring and one-on-one summer make-up courses in accordance with home school curricula • Narrative, drama, improv, and yoga as integrative therapeutic activities • Neuromodulatory interventions including neurofeedback and deepTranscranial Magnetic Stimulation • Additional support for specialized mental health needs is also available, addressing trauma, troubled relationship between body and self, including eating disorders, and substance use struggles

Adolescent Integrative Services at Yellowbrick can help you and your teen through these difficult times.

WHEN

Assessment and Individualized Treatment available with flexible scheduling. Intensive Outpatient Program Starts June 15, 2020 Monday, Tuesday, Thursday Noon - 3PM Offered via video

PLEASE CONTACT

Tracey Reaves, MA Coordinator of Adolescent Educational and Clinical Services 866-364-2300 ext. 227 treaves@yellowbrickprogram.com Yellowbrick One Rotary Center 1560 Sherman Avenue, Suite 400 Evanston, IL 60201

For more information, contact Yellowbrick today. The Assessment Center @ 866.364.2300 ext. 233

Please visit out website to learn more about Yellowbrick. www.yellowbrickprogram.com

Yellowbrick is a national center of excellence specializing in the treatment of troubled adolescents, emerging adults and their families. Yellowbrick Remains Open During Shelter in Place while following all CDC Precautions and Recommendations.

$ 0 DOWN SECURITY DEPOSIT 1ST MOTH PAYMENT DUE AT SIGNING AUTOBARNNISSAN.COM

SALES CENTER 1012 CHICAGO AVENUE EVANSTON, IL 60202 877 291 0752 SERVICE CENTER 2201 AUTOBARN WAY EVANSTON, IL 60202 877 294 3502