June 2014

Falconer

The Torrey Pines High School

www.tphsfalconer.com

3710 Del Mar Heights Road, San Diego, CA 92130

Thursday, June 5, 2014

Vol. 39, Issue 9, 28 pages

A LOOK INSIDE: focus

See B1-B4 College Map PHOTO BY KENNETH LIN/FALCONER

TPHS Changes Visual and Performing Arts Days The TPHS dance team performed in the Dance Day on June 3, part of a changed VPA performance schedule. Each TPHS arts department was assigned a different performance date and location. By Michelle Hao

The TPHS dance team hosted Dance Day on June 3 in the gymnasium, as part of the changes made to the annual Visual and Performing Arts Days.

This year, VPA Days were split into separate days for art, dance and film. For Art’s Sake, an exhibition of student art, was held from May 28-29, while the film event will be held from June 5-6 in the lecture hall.

Dance Day performances were held each period, and lasted a little over half an hour each. The event featured performances choreographed by students, as well as team competition pieces choreographed by coaches. Dance team members auditioned choreography to be selected for the show.

According to dance teacher Sarah Kaye, Dance Day was not only an opportunity to showcase student talent, but also a promotion for Expression Session, an annual dance show that will be held on June 7.

“This is a great way for my dancers to build up their stamina and to run through their pieces,” Kaye said. “It gets them going for Expression Session [and allows us to] work out the little kinks that we have in our dances.”

Dance Day performances included hiphop, lyrical, break dancing and contemporary styles, while Expression Session will include a greater variety of genres as well as solo performances. Some pieces from Dance Day will also appear in Expression Session. “[Dance Day] is really fun,” varsity dancer Nurie Kim (12) said. “We don’t have that many chances to perform at school, so it’s really fun to show what you’ve been working on the whole year.”

Although over 20 classes per period signed up to see the Dance Day show, dance performances during the former VPA Days had been even more popular, as the

gymnasium used to be “jam-packed” and “crowded beyond belief,” according to Kaye.

“VPA Day is great because we get to see a lot of kids express themselves, show their talent, and we get to see a lot of amazing performances,” said Sheyda Khonji (10), who watched the Dance Day performance.

According to drama teacher Marinee Payne, the San Diego County wildfires during the week of May 12 led to scheduling conflicts and insufficient preparation time, which prevented the theater program from participating in this year’s exhibitions.

The TPHS music program was unable to host an event for similar reasons, as they did not have enough time to prepare with two competitions, two performances and an elementary school tour before the designated VPA days.

see VPA, A3

opinion My indifference masks the determination that will help keep my friends together until another event brings us into contact again.

“

—Cory Lomberg (12) See A7, Personal Perspective

BIRD’S EYE

VIEW opinion....................A5 feature..................A10 entertainment......A14 sports.....................A20 backpage............A24 focus........................B1

Cara Couvillion selected Prop AA renovations begun at TPHS as new CVMS principal f f

By Anna Li

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By Anna Lee ���� ������

Current TPHS Assistant Principal Cara Couvillion will begin serving as principal of Carmel Valley Middle School on July 1 after being named to the position on May 16.

Couvillion has served as an assistant principal at TPHS since September 2011. Prior to entering the SDUHSD, Couvillion was the principal of Julian High School from 2009-2011.

“I became an assistant principal to get some practice in a larger district and an understanding of how a larger district works,” Couvillion said. “I knew as part of my career that I wanted to be principal again.”

The openings for principal positions at Diegueno Middle School and CVMS were posted on the SDUHSD website at the beginning of April, and around 50 applicants interviewed for both positions over the following six weeks, according to SDUHSD Superintendent Rick Schmitt. The final interview panel recommended Couvillion to the

see COUVILLION, A3

The first phase of renovations at TPHS in accordance with the $75 million bond allocated by Proposition AA, which passed in November 2012, began May 22.

In order to accommodate construction materials, the back left quarter of the drop-off parking lot is fenced off along with the hill above the lot.

Jessica Yang (10) was dropped off in the area before it was fenced off and does not think blocking off the area significantly affects the traffic flow and that it is “just as congested as usual.”

“Since it is closer to the end of the school year, we’re hoping that anything that obstructs students and teachers happens over the summer,” Principal David Jaffe said. “Unfortunately, as with all renovations, kids and classes are going to have to be moved, but we have a plan to do it as smoothly as possible.”

The planned changes to the athletics area in the first phase include expanding the varsity baseball field, adding a new weight room and renovating the

softball field, according to Jaffe. A path will also be added to make access to the athletic facilities easier from the parking lot.

The parking lot is expected to be blocked off until November 2014, when the construction of four new chemistry labs will begin where the current weight room and football office are located. The two other construction phases involve reshaping the B building, to begin June 2015, and renovating the performing arts building.

“Renovating the B building will definitely affect us more,” Jaffe said. “The renovations will be done in quarters, and the classrooms in each quarter will have to be moved to the trailers.”

According to the Proposition AA Master Plan, the administration building, with the exception of the principal’s office, will be moved to the front of campus, and an elevator and a new stair entry will provide access to the B building.

Renovations for all three phases are scheduled for completion in 2018.

A2 the falconer

news

Global Update

june 5, 2014

by Maya Rao Afghanistan Army Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl, the only U.S. soldier imprisoned by the Taliban in Afghanistan after leaving his base in 2009, was released after nearly five years in exchange for five Taliban prisoners previously held in the U.S. prison at Guantanamo Bay, Cuba.

Winston-Salem, N.C. Maya Angelou, poet and author of “I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings,” died May 28.

Angelou was instrumental in the Civil Rights Movement at its height, in which she worked with both Martin Luther King Jr. and Malcom X. She was also active in the women’s movement.

Madrid, Spain King Juan Carlos I of Spain abdicated in favor of his son, Prince Felipe, on June 1, amid long-term economic crisis and popular discontent.

Felipe will be responsible for restoring the prestige of the monarchy as Spain suffers from high unemployment and an independence movement in the Catalonia region.

New Delhi, India Despite being labeled as an extreme Hindu nationalist, Narendra Modi of the Bharatiya Janat Party was sworn in as Prime Minister of India on May 26, after winning the biggest election in history. The BJP won with a record voter turnout of 66.38 percent — it is estimated that over 551 million people cast ballots.

ART BY SOPHIE YOU

UCSD holds candlelight vigil for UCSB shooting victims f

By Caroline Rutten ����� ������

A student-organized candlelight vigil was held at the University of California, San Diego on May 26 to honor the victims of a shooting in Isla Vista near the University of California, Santa Barbara.

Six UCSB students were killed in a stabbing and shooting spree

by Santa Barbara City College student Elliot Rodger before he apparently ended his own life.

According to the Facebook event for the vigil, over 2,500 people attended, including several TPHS students. The event was held outside the UCSD Geisel Library, and participants walked in silence from Library Walk to Revelle Plaza holding candles. TPHS student Alexandra Kiselyov (11), who attended the event, said people spoke about the tragedy and how it could have been avoided. Several UCSB students were also in attendance, according to Kiselyov.

“There has been an overwhelming amount of support from our sister UC campuses and [other schools],” UCSB student Doreen Govari (‘13) said. “[Also]

[t]he 20,000 people who attended the memorial [at UCSB], 5,000 people at the UCSB candlelight vigil, the chalk memorial wall at the Pardall Center [at UCSB], the memorial sites at each of the shootings and the countless number of events that are still to take place this week all contribute to the community’s healing process.”

According to Kiselyov, the vigil had a “solemn” atmosphere.

“We did not speak [while walking] out of obligation for the victims — an unspoken rule, I suppose,” Kiselyov said. “But there was also an atmosphere of togetherness, unification in the face of a tragedy.”

Vonnie Vuagniaux (11) spoke at the vigil about her emotions surrounding the shooting and its aftermath.

“I spoke about how beautiful it was that we could all come together even though it is a time people can be cynical,” Vuagniaux said. “It was beautiful to be together and support each other, even if we didn’t know each other.

I felt very passionate about it.”

Govari is unaware of increased security practices or personnel on the UCSB campus since the

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shooting but said despite the suddenness of the shooting spree, the police, both Santa Barbara Sheriff’s deputies and UCSB campus police, responded quickly.

“We are so grateful for all the officers, paramedics and doctors

that all helped,” Govari said. “I don’t think there was anything more that any of them could do ... this is [not] an issue exclusive to Isla Vista; this is a national issue. There will always be people in need of help who want

to inflict harm ... [t]oo many lives have been lost as a result of gun violence.”

Memorials for the victims were also held at UCLA, UC Irvine, UC Santa Cruz, UC Riverside, UC Davis and UC Berkeley.

PHOTO COURTESY OF KGTV 10 NEWS

LIGHTS ON AT THE LIBRARY: Thousands of people gathered outside of Geisel Library at the University of California, San Diego on May 26 for a candlelight vigil honoring the lives lost in the Isla Vista shooting.

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COUVILLION continued from A1 school board, which then approved her hire as CVMS principal on May 1.

“She has a unique gift where she connects with students and parents and staff, but does it in a way that’s fun,” Schmitt said.

“She’s a motivator, an encourager, but she also knows how to do the more difficult parts of school administration: [responding] when folks make bad choices, delivering bad news, being real honest — and that’s part of the job, too.”

Jessica Perron (12), who frequently interacts with Couvillion as PALs president, said that Couvillion has the “ideal personality for this type of position.”

“She’s really easygoing and engaging,” Perron said. “She can relate to kids, but still get her point across.”

According to Assistant Principal Rob Coppo, Couvillion brought humor, enthusiasm, “life and energy to the school.”

“We’re going to miss her terribly,” Coppo said. “She made this school a better place. She’s left her mark here, and I couldn’t wish her more luck.”

Couvillion said that she is “really excited to be principal,” but is “truly sad to be leaving Torrey Pines.”

“I absolutely loved working at TPHS, and I’ll cherish everything I learned from staff, students, parents and the community,” Couvillion said. “I’m sad to go, but I’m really happy it’s for a good reason.”

Couvillion said she currently has a one-year contract as CVMS principal, which is standard

for SDUHSD administrative positions. She does not know how long she will be at CVMS, but she hopes it is a long-term position.

Current CVMS principal Laurie Brady has been at the school for six years, according to Schmitt. Brady declined to comment on her future plans as an educator.

As the new CVMS principal, Couvillion will focus on the transition to Common Core State Standards and other changes going on at the state and federal levels.

“I’m still learning a lot about the school,” Couvillion said. “I believe in shared leadership.

I will be getting input from collaborating with teachers and parents and students, talking about what they want to see in their school and making that happen.”

Couvillion also hopes to promote more communication between CVMS, Earl Warren Middle School, and neighboring high schools, TPHS and Canyon Crest Academy.

“I hope to build a bigger bridge and do more collaboration across the board — maybe get some high school students to do programs there and middle school students to do programs here,” Couvillion said. “I’m really glad that while at Carmel Valley, I’ll still have an effect on students that will be going to Torrey Pines and hopefully ... supporting everyone here, along with the staff at CCA.” According to Schmitt, other staff changes include current EWMS principal Mary Anne Nuskin becoming principal of the new middle school near CCA in fall 2015 and a new TPHS assistant principal being chosen in August.

the falconer

VPA DAY continued from A1 According to music teacher Amy Willcox, VPA performances were originally held in February in order to recruit students for the arts programs the following school year.

“Things got really busy and crazy with the fires,” Kaye said. “It was really hard to pull [performances] off this year. We were just barely ready … [But] I really liked [the former] VPA [Days] where all the arts were all together, and I would love to

go back to that. But we like this because this is a great rehearsal for Expression Session.”

Some students also preferred the original VPA Days, where performances were held on the same day in the same location.

“I liked VPA Days [more] because it’s more fun with more people there,” varsity dance team member Katie Qian (11) said. “[The arts programs] are next to each other every single day in classrooms, but we don’t really see each other.”

On the other hand, art teacher Julie Limerick prefers

A3

the new format because there “isn’t pressure to coordinate [schedules between departments].” According to Limerick, the old format of VPA Days was “chaotic,” and there was a lot of tension.

“This year was easier,” Limerick said. “When you’re talking 100 teachers and so many classes and students are trying to fit all the puzzle pieces together, it’s always more complex.”

The format and scheduling for next year’s VPA performances have not yet been determined.

PHOTO BY GRACE BRUTON/FALCONER

SHOW AND TELL: Students exhibit their work at For Art’s Sake in the art room, which annually showcases the talent of many TPHS artists. The artists also price their pieces, which anyone can buy.

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A4 the falconer

news

june 5, 2014

Students place at international science fair

f

By Sarah Brown

������������� ������

Kalyani Ramadurgam (9) and MinJean Cho (10) received awards for their projects in the Intel International Science Fair that took place from May 11-16 at the Los Angeles Convention Center.

Ramadurgam placed third in the computer science category and Cho received a second place award from the Society of Exploration Geophysicists. Each was granted a $1,000 cash prize for his or her work.

Inspired by the Boston Marathon bombing and how “the only data [about the terrorists was] them looking away from the camera,” Ramadurgam created facial recognition technology that detects faces from obscure angles.

Cho developed a way of

identifying unknown pathogenic bacteria using Bayes’ Theorem, which Cho said impressed the judges since geophysicists “use Bayes’ Theorem to detect oil and water.”

About 1,800 international students from 70 different countries entered the competition. Cho said that beforehand she had considered it a “trial year,” and was not expecting to win. “[The convention] was a lot of fun, and I hope I can go next year,” Cho said. “The pin exchange was really fun, where people from 70 countries gather, exchange pins and talk about where they are from. We also went to Universal Studios because it was closed to the public for us.”

Participants also had the opportunity to discuss their projects in groups and connect

with expert judges. In addition, Ramadurgam was offered internships by Apple Inc. and the U.S. Armed Forces.

Cho was offered internships by the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration, as well as the Samuel Lawrence Foundation.

Cho encourages her peers to participate in the science fair and hopes that the event will expand in the future.

“A lot of people think that science is something really unapproachable and something that only super A-plus students can do,” Cho said. “I’m not a genius, and actually I got a 63 percent on my first calculus test.

[The judges] really recognize your creativity, so it’s not just like taking a test in your math class or solving an equation. As long as you have creativity, you can enter the science fair.”

PHOTO USED BY PERMISSION OF MINJEAN CHO

STUDENT SCIENTISTS: MinJean Cho (10), second from right, and Kalyani Ramadurgam (9), third from right, placed second and third, respectively, in their categories at the Intel International Science Fair.

TPHS students win top three places in writing competition “I decided to participate because I absolutely love creative writing, and this seemed like a Anastasia Armendariz (11), great opportunity to practice and Anna Lee (10) and Jesse Giordano get feedback,” Lee said. “It was (10) won first, second and third nice to get some reassurance as a place, respectively, in a creative writer.” writing contest hosted by the The three TPHS winners and Rancho Santa Fe Literary Society. two honorable mention winners “[The contest was] a wonderful from San Dieguito Academy, experience for the students and their teachers were invited to practice their craft and be to a luncheon at the Grand Del recognized for their abilities,” Mar Hotel. The attendees also TPHS English department participated in a private questionco-chair Lisa Callender said. and-answer session with author “The prize was certainly no Eleanor Morse, and received a hinderance.” copy of her novel, “White Dog Fell Each student from the Sky.” received a “It was certificate, a interesting to Kindle and a $50 learn about [The contest] was a how there is Kindle store gift card. In addition, wonderful experience not only one first place was way of writing,” for the students to ... A r m e n d a r i z awarded $1,000, second place was be recognized for their said. “You don’t awarded $750 ecessarily abilities. nneed and third place to have was awarded Lisa Callender e v e r y t h i n g $500. out ������� planned “[Winning before you third place] was write, and [you something I didn’t think would should] be open to [finding] new actually happen,” Giordano said. things about your characters and “I [participated] just because it yourself as a writer.” sounded fun and it was something The private reception was I wanted to do, and then finding followed by a luncheon, where the out that I won $500 for doing students received their respective something I love was great.” awards and Morse spoke to them Participants were given a and members of the RSFLS about month and a half to interpret and her novel. write a short story inspired by the “This year, [TPHS students] famous portrait of Adele Bloch- did a clean sweep [in the contest],” Bauer I by Gustav Klimt. The Callender said. “It was wonderful contest was open to all San Diego to see.”

County high schools. There were The event was the last of over 40 submissions at TPHS, the frequent literary luncheons but only four students’ work from hosted by the RSFLC, which will each school could be sent to the resume next school year when RSFLC. their new “book season” begins.

f

By Sarah Chan ����� ������

”

TPHS bids farewell to retiring faculty members nd eo a Rom liet Ju

Barbara Swovelin has been teaching English at TPHS since 1982, but she believes that her students and the faculty have kept her “young, fresh and alive.” Although Swovelin has enjoyed a “wonderful” teaching career, she looks forward to “exploring,” like Calvin from “Calvin and Hobbes,” the “magical world” beyond the classroom.

Dr. Maryjane Palmer has conducted speech language therapy at TPHS for 15 years, helping students to decode words, pronounce sounds correctly and prepare for oral presentations. Palmer will move to Southern Indiana, where she will teach college classes, play the flute in a community band and play with her dogs.

Anne-Marie Godfrey has taught all over the world, but considers her 24-year tenure at TPHS especially “exhilarating.” Godfrey wishes students would take French more seriously because she believes that language study is “useful later on.” Godfrey plans to volunteer with students after she retires.

Since he joined the TPHS faculty in 1979, Burt Blackwell has worked with students as a track coach and a P.E. teacher. While Blackwell’s “fondest memories” came from his tenure as JV football coach, he looks forward to not going to work every morning and having more time for golf and tennis and music and fitness.

INFOGRAPHIC BY ALICE QU/FALCONER

OPINION

Cory Lomberg ponders the values of friendship, A7

Brazil not ready to host the World Cup and Olympics, A8

YES f

By Anna Lee ���� ������

In an execution by firing squad, the inmate is bound to a chair with straps across the waist and head and a black hood over the head. Five shooters fire at the inmate through slots in a canvas wall, and the prisoner dies from blood loss caused by rupture of the heart or a large blood vessel or tearing of the lungs, according to the Death Penalty Information Center. As Utah lawmaker Paul Ray put it, the firing squad may be a bit reminiscent of the Wild West, but it is “probably the most humane way to kill somebody.”

The firing squad is used selectively in only two states: Oklahoma and Utah. Meanwhile, lethal injection is authorized in 35 states as the primary method of execution. However, a 2012 study published by the British Journal of American Legal Studies found that lethal injection has a higher rate of failure than any other execution method. And with Lockett’s botched execution exemplifying the potential for lethal injection to become cruel and unusual punishment — Lockett writhed in agony for 43 minutes after the injection before dying of a heart attack, according to The New York Times — it is clearly time to start looking into alternative methods of execution.

The firing squad is an efficient form of capital punishment, killing the prisoner almost instantly. The process may sound draconian, but

In the wake of Oklahoma prisoner Clayton Lockett’s botched lethal injection, Utah, Wyoming and Missouri state lawmakers have begun drafting bills to bring back the firing squad. compared to the horrific suffering that inmates like Lockett have experienced from lethal injection failures, execution by firing squad is humane. There is no drawnout torment or uncertainty; it is precise and effective. Of course, it is possible that shooters could miss the inmate’s heart, leaving the prisoner to die a slow death by blood loss. However, there have only been two known botched executions by firing squad in the United States since the 1800s, while the lethal injection method has led to two unnecessarily painful deaths in 2014 alone.

That is not to say that the firing squad should completely replace lethal injection; it should simply be brought back as a choice. Even hanging exists in three states as an option for executions, which certainly seems less humane than the firing squad.

Drug manufacturers’ refusal to sell drugs to states for lethal injection has led to experimentation with the drug combinations being injected for execution — the firing squad is a guaranteed quick death with an almost nonexistent rate of failure.

There is no experimentation since there is certainly no shortage of bullets. It provides a surefire method of execution for prisoners, who do not have to worry about whether or not they, like Lockett, will convulse to death as a result of lethal injection drug cocktails.

Perhaps the death penalty itself is inhumane. Perhaps people killing people in the name of the law will never constitute a respectable form of punishment.

But in states where capital punishment exists, it is best to give prisoners every choice of whatever execution method they feel is most humane, whether that be by needle or by gun.

We asked you...

Should U.S. states bring back the firing squad as a method of execution?

30%

70%

YES

NO

said

said

Only two states in the United States have the firing squad as an option for state execution — Oklahoma, in which it is the third option, done only if lethal injection and electrocution are ruled unconstitutional, and Utah, in which it is an option for inmates sentenced before 2004, when firing squads were outlawed. However, state Rep. Paul Ray of Utah plans to propose a bill in a legislative session next year that would reintroduce the firing squad as a more humane form of execution. Although the firing squad seems to be gaining popularity — a similar bill was introduced in Wyoming — death by firing squad is barbaric and should not be implemented.

On June 17, 2010, convicted murderer Ronnie Lee Gardner was the last person in Utah to be executed by firing squad.

His arms, legs and head were strapped to a metal chair and four bullets — from five executioners, one had blanks instead of bullets in his gun — ripped through a target pinned over his heart.

He effectively served as nothing more than target practice for his executioners.

The U.S. Supreme Court upheld the use of the firing squad in 1879, but since then, more efficient methods of execution have been developed. According to a poll by NBC News, of Americans who want capital punishment, only 12 percent favor the firing squad, as opposed to the 54 percent that favor lethal injection as the only method of execution.

Over 1,200 inmates have been executed by lethal injection since 1976. It is, by and large, the quickest and least painful method of execution, and people should not discount it simply because of a few cases of botched executions.

States have been turning to

NO f

ART BY CAROLYN CHU/FALCON ARTIST

Should the firing squad be brought back?

By Maya Rao ����� ������

alternative methods of execution, like the firing squad, partly because of a shortage of lethal injection drugs. However, instead of funding research to develop new methods of execution — or maybe just developing domesticallyproduced drug cocktails that do the job — the government has decided to turn back the clock on execution methods.

The bill to reinstate execution by firing squad came after the recent botched executions by lethal injection, most notably that of Clayton Lockett in Oklahoma, who died 43 minutes after officials stopped administering the drugs.

Ray says that execution by firing squad is more humane because the convict dies instantaneously.

However, there have been several cases in which the executioners have missed their targets, one of the most noteworthy being an 1897 instance where the executioners missed the convict’s heart, causing him to suffer for 27 minutes before dying. Although execution by firing squad can be quick and accurate, if the convict moves even slightly, the bullets can miss the heart and instead cause intense suffering.

Reverting to outdated methods will only drive the country toward the past instead of fostering a sense of innovation. In order for a country to survive, it must embrace the future, no matter how hard it is to let the past go.

A6 the falconer

opinion

june 5, 2014

STAFFEDITORIAL: RAPIST GETS NO PRISON TIME David Wise was sentenced to eight years of home confinement on May 14, after being convicted of six felonies related to drugging and raping his now ex-wife, Mandy Boardman. Wise’s sentence is inappropriate for one conviction of rape and five felony counts of criminal deviate conduct. Wise’s punishment does not fit the magnitude of his crimes, each of which usually carries six to 20 years of prison time.

Boardman was told to forgive her attacker by Superior Court judge Kurt Eisgruber in Marion County, Ind. despite having been repeatedly drugged and raped by her husband over the course of at least three years.

It is not incumbant upon a victim of rape and “deviate conduct” to assuage the feelings of her attacker with forgiveness, especially since subsequent psychological trauma may surpass even the physical harm the victim has already suffered.

That Boardman was advised to forgive Wise when he escaped any appropriate sentence is even more preposterous.

“

I’ve heard of other things happening like that and people usually get 20 or 15 years, so I think 20 years would be fair.

Daniel Roth (9)

Wise’s sentence and Eisgruber’s comment are simply perpetuations of the history of laxity in punishing perpetrators of spousal or intimate partner rape.

For instance, while it is obvious that rapists are to blame for rape, Wise will serve no time in prison for his crimes. Instead, since he is currently unemployed, Wise will “mostly be at home watching TV,” and will not be required to attend therapy, according to Marion County deputy prosecutor Courtney Curtis.

The U.S. legal system is based on precedent, so the historical lack of severity in sentencing of convicted rapists makes it difficult to get a sentence a victim feels is satisfactory. For example, a Texas judge recently sentenced an admitted rapist to a five-year probation because his 14-yearold victim was “not the victim she pretended to be,” referring to her alleged sexual history. This reinforces the reluctance of rape victims to come forward with accusations and goes a long way in assuring rapists their sentences

will be light. A harsher sentence for Wise would have set a tougher and more suitable precedent.

The ramifications of all rape cases are many and varied, often including psychological trauma, and such dire consequences must be punished accordingly.

Although it is harder to prove spousal or intimate partner rape, as well as rape when the victim knows her attacker, such cases should be tirelessly investigated and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

Wise’s sentence does not reflect this principle, since he will serve no prison time for his crimes.

Instead, commonly lenient sentences for such instances of spousal rape suggest that rape is a crime men can commit without fear of significant consequence.

Spousal rape was legal in almost all states until the 1970s. It is still classified as a crime different from rape in California and other states. In addition, a spousal rape conviction does not always require that a perpetrator be designated a sex offender.

Wise, who has not yet expressed

any remorse or apology t Boardman, justified drugging his wife by claiming that she was “snippy” and it made her “nicer” when he drugged her, according to Curtis.

Eisgruber’s unfortunate and clearly misguided decision should affect his career just as it affected Boardman’s life. The public dismay and disbelief about the sentence, as well as Eisgruber’s advice for Boardman, serve as telling indicators of the judge’s professional credibility. He is up

STUDENT VOICES

“

[Wise] should definitely get the normal punishment ... I don’t see what makes him so special.

Tori Austin (10)

Do you think that David Wise received the proper punishment for his crimes?

o

for re-election in November.

Violating another human being is a serious crime and should have serious repercussions, and the authorities of the U.S. legal system would do well to remember this the next time they are faced with decisions concerning instances of rape, spousal or otherwise.

ART BY ELLESE NGUYEN/FALCON ARTIST

”

”

[Wise] should have gotten [a greater] punishment. He should have gotten whatever the law says.

[Wise] should have gotten worse because he did rape her, he did abuse her ... it’s not right to hurt someone intentionally.

Erik Zhang (11)

Stephanie Merida (12)

“Common core will turn your children gay!”

Clearly, the only test we need is the Bible.

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opinion

tphsfalconer.com

the falconer

A7

9/11 museum needs to change offensive policies guides aren’t going to be inside that building and saying, ‘Behind that wall are the victims of 9/11.’

That’s a dog and pony show.”

Of course, the museum must find some way to fund itself, or else it would disappear completely. However, according to president Ford W. Bell of the American Alliance of Museums, revenue from admission, retail sales and public programming account for around 5 percent of total museum revenue. So, the museum might say it needs the gift shop and astronomical admission fee to keep running, but since donations, investments and government support make up the bulk of museum revenue, the question of where that extra money is going is legitimate— perhaps it goes to one of those cocktail parties mentioned earlier, where a select crowd congregates to imbibe alcohol and break the museum rule that alcohol is “prohibited on 9/11 Memorial and Museum property.”

The ridiculous memorabilia and admission fees are plainly ways of trying to profit from a supposedly nonprofit institution; the revenue garnered from these facets of the museum are wholly unnecessary, and should be eliminated.

Profit generation aside, there is still more controversy. On May 21, journalist Jen Chung of the Gothamist was kicked out for asking a single question. It was not a planned interview;

rather, Chung attempted to ask a visitor who loudly criticized another visitor for talking on her cell phone what had prompted the confrontation. Chung was promptly removed from the premises by security. To be fair, there is a strict policy against journalists conducting interviews so as not to disturb people’s emotional visits to the museum, but at a museum that celebrates freedom triumphing over terrorism, it is ironic that First

Amendment rights are forbidden.

The museum is obviously trying to profit from visitors through its gift shop and admission fee, yet it will not allow visitors to connect with the museum by addressing questions or concerns.

We must ask: Are the museum’s intentions truly sincere? As of now, despite its efforts to act as a memorial to the events of 9/11, the museum’s policies display a flippant disrespect for the tragedy and those affected by it.

I am on the cusp of my high school graduation, and with more than 600 other seniors in my class, people have always surrounded me. But it is easy to feel alone in a place like this — on such a crowded campus, I often see kids eating lunch by themselves.

As the next piece of my life falls into place, an innate fear of desertion follows. When I grow up, I’m supposed to garner some sort of individuality — emotionally, physically, financially. I almost The Falconer’s editor-in-chief considers feel ready to flee the nest; to take calling my mom a couple times her role as a homie and the changes that to a week and start molding a future college will bring. all on my own with whatever tools provided to me at a liberal arts college.

My individuality is taking shape, but its legs are shaky.

In three months, I’ll leave my school, my parents, my cats and my bed. But truthfully, and maybe twistedly, the most intimidating prospect is leaving my friends.

There was never a time in high school when I lacked a central group of astonishing friends.

My friends are far too good to me, in the way they all worry, the way they all ask about the best and worst parts of my day. In what feels like a cluster of confusion, my friends watch out for me with more rationality PHOTO BY GRACE BRUTON/FALCONER and understanding than I have ever demonstrated to them. I try to do the same for them, but sometimes I’m just not as good at it.

The events of my senior year thus far have only highlighted how exceptional my friends are.

We’re strong together. Sometimes

it seems that each piece is strong separately — except for me. I feel like a complementary piece of the puzzle. This whole time, I’ve carried on because even when I could not see my friends, I knew they were there. Soon, they won’t be.

be like it has been. Emotional distance only accentuates a physical gap. I learned this once before: The box that held my first pair of Doc Martens is buried deep underneath the jacaranda tree in my front yard, now containing a scrapbook compiled by my sixthgrade best friends. We planned to dig it up “Crossroads”-style upon high school graduation, which, incidentally, is about a week away. I worry about the initial awkwardness of reaching out to two friends I have barely spoken to in the second half of my high school career. I wouldn’t blame them if they rejected the plan we hatched six years ago. As time passed, we pursued different goals, boys and social circles. We used to be in the same circle. We used to be a circle. I don’t even know where they live anymore.

By Alex Jen

���� ������

The National September 11 Memorial and Museum, which opened on May 14, is apparently a hauntingly beautiful result of nearly 12 years of work.

The museum houses crushed emergency vehicles, ash-covered store merchandise from the day of the attacks, and the remnants of the structural columns of the original Twin Towers. The museum also has a gift shop, a $24 admission fee and a repository for unidentified remains, not open to the public. Add that to the fact that cameras and phones are prohibited, that a journalist was reportedly kicked out for asking a visitor a single question, and that first responders from the attacks allegedly were turned away on May 20 so the museum could set up for a black-tie cocktail party, and it is obvious that the museum has a lot of problems it needs to address.

Having a gift shop at a tourist attraction or significant historical site is not unheard of — after all,

PERSONAL PERSPECTIVE CORY LOMBERG

ART BY RUSSELL REED/FALCONER

f

nearly all museums make sure visitors walk past some alluring souvenirs before leaving. But the September 11 Museum is not a tourist attraction, nor is it just a historical site. The museum was built on the site of the old World Trade Center, right where people lived, worked, talked and took lunch breaks — up until hijackers flew two planes into the World Trade Center towers.

Needless to say, the 9/11 museum and memorial complex is a place of mourning and remembrance, and there is no room to be selling cheese platters shaped like the U.S. with hearts marking the spots of the attacks or stuffed, sad-faced toys of the Twin Towers with crashing planes stitched into their sides. These so-called souvenirs demonstrate a blatant disrespect for the devastating tragedy that was 9/11 and are vastly inappropriate in such a solemn setting. Not only are the goods sold a tip of the hat to crass commercialism, but they are also located in a sensitive area. The gift shop is in the same building where unidentified remains of those killed in the attacks are kept. Although those remains are hidden from museum visitors, protected by double steel doors and only able accessible by victims’ relatives, one father of a firefighter killed in the attack put it best in an interview with New York Magazine: “You can’t tell me that tour

There was never a time in high school when I lacked a central group of astonishing friends.

Last month, 10 of us went on a vacation. I spent a weekend lying under a tent while the smell of sunscreen and sweat hung on the back of my neck. We met in the early morning and lay on our backs and on top of each other. I fell asleep on the bus ride home, and woke up to blue, bruised feet, a sign of other feet that trampled my own out of excitement and happiness and unification. It was a treasure, a mark of my own worthiness, like a scraped knee earned on the playground. We act like children, because at least for now, that is what we are.

For once, I did not feel like the only weak one. In a mature environment, we all retreated to a state of childlike dependency on one another. We saw this time as an opportunity to leave our obligations at home. I sensed the absence of that usual calculation, the kind that parents and teachers and college admissions officers supposedly love.

We woke up on Monday morning and felt unhappy. The beginning of the week marked something else, something that I couldn’t vocalize. We all knew, of course, what this really meant — we didn’t have much time left together. Yeah, I’ll be 11 miles of Los Angeles traffic away from a friend next year, but it won’t

It was a treasure, a mark of my own worthiness, like a scraped knee earned on the playground.

What if my friends move on, leaving me immobile right where I started? What if they move on, and I am still awaiting the reunion? Or, could I be so neglectful to forget all the things they gave me? I never properly thanked my friends. They never left me alone, even when I wanted to be.

In accepting this, I know they never will. My indifference masks the determination that will help keep my friends together until another event brings us into contact again. I don’t have to be the complementary piece or angle, or whatever. I don’t have to be a complement. I am an equally important component in the circle that rounds out all of my best friends.

A8 the falconer

opinion

june 5, 2014

Brazil unprepared for World Cup or Olympics

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By Tasia Mochernak ���� ������

Brazil is the only country that has qualified for every FIFA World Cup ever held, and it has won five times. However, despite its impressive athletic achievements, Brazil will not be able to host the 2014 World Cup at the standard expected of such a prestigious international sporting event. Preparations for the World Cup have been severely marred by delays in construction and strikes by organized labor groups demanding higher pay and better working conditions.

In addition, Brazil must shoulder the cost of both the World Cup and the 2016 Summer Olympic Games, both of which will have dire repercussions on its already poor economy. The June 12 opening ceremony of the World Cup is approaching quickly, and judging by the current state of preparations, Brazil will not be able to adequately host the biggest event for the world’s most popular sport. Given that Brazil has shown such negligence with the World Cup, it should not be the host country for the 2016 Olympics.

Brazil has undertaken many infrastructure projects to prepare for the World Cup. Twelve stadiums and various structures such as airports, public transit systems and hotels are being built or refurbished as needed — a total expected cost $14.5 billion, according to Bloomberg News.

Three of the stadiums have not yet been completed, and parts of other stadiums will not be completed until after the World Cup ends. In addition, many of the public infrastructure projects, such as the transit lines from airports to stadiums, remain incomplete. The organizational issues for the infrastructure of the World Cup will severely affect the return on investment that Brazil is hoping for, thereby putting it in a worse economic position than it was before it was awarded the tournament.

The Brazilian government’s excessive spending for the World Cup has already provoked violent protests. The 2013 FIFA Confederations Cup, essentially a rehearsal for the World Cup, became the backdrop for the biggest protest movement in many years. The protests have continued, with demonstrations against the massive spending for the World Cup, which leaves no money for social projects, housing or repair of schools and hospitals.

The citizens of Brazil clearly do not want such a major sporting event to take place in their country, as it further degrades their already poor living conditions. Hosting

a tournament of a country’s favorite sport will not make citizens support the decisions of that government, especially if the event is not successful due to the fault of the government. The Brazilian government should be taking the opinions of its citizens into consideration if it wants to avoid major repercussions, both nationally and globally.

Brazil’s economic woes and violent protests likely will not end with the World Cup. The 2016 Summer Olympic Games in Rio de Janeiro are facing similar issues — delays in construction, rising costs and bad communication between different levels of the Brazilian government and organizing

committee.

International Olympic Committee vice president John Coates labeled Brazil’s preparations the worst he had ever seen and “critically behind schedule.” It is clear that Brazil will suffer enormous negative consequences from the economic strain of hosting the World Cup. Considering the current state of preparations and its recklesss spending on the World Cup, Brazil has proven itself irresponsible and thus incapable of hosting the highly anticipated Olympic Games. The

Olympics should be moved to a country more financially capable of hosting such an event in order to avoid inciting anger worldwide from both governments and patrons of the games.

The slogan of the World Cup is “All in One Rhythm.”

However, the excessive spending, incomplete infrastructure projects and subsequent protests have only served to disrupt Brazilian society and create even greater rifts between the Brazilian government and the rest of the world, including the country’s own citizens. Brazil is battling too many issues and controversies to be able to host a successful, peaceful World Cup — and it will not be able to recover from the chaos in time to hold the Olympic Games with the same amount of grandeur expected of such a major sporting event.

ART BY JACKI LI/FALCON ARTIST

EU decision to remove data from Google unwise

������� ������

On May 13, the European Union Court of Justice ruled that Google must remove links to outdated or irrelevant personal information from search results upon request by any EU citizen. Exceptions could be made only when the information involves a public figure, and it would be against the public interest to remove information.

Google can choose to approve or deny requests, but anyone can challenge the company’s decision in court. Although the ruling has been labeled a major victory in maintaining online privacy, enforcing the right to be “forgotten” is not only unwise, but also outside the jurisdiction of search engines like Google.

In practice, the Court’s ruling will be impossible to enforce nonarbitrarily. Politicians, other public figures or even minor criminals might try to have incriminating facts about them removed from the web. While the Court’s “public life” exception appears to preclude this possibility, a means to determine the balance between individual privacy and the public’s right to know is notably absent in the ruling. Weighing these considerations is challenging,

The point of a search engine is to display information that exists on the web; forcing them to remove links to legitimate content that is already in the public domain seems like censorship, and is inconsistent with the freedom of information the Internet is supposed to offer.

The thesis of privacy activists in this instance does not ring true.

Either information that “violates” privacy is accurate, which raises the question of why it ought to be erased in the first place, or is false or misleading — in which case prohibitions on libel and slander should provide legal recourse. There are also logical conundrums, since a website

operator’s right to its online content seems like the exact converse of an individual’s right to have it hidden. Finally, any given web page might hold both relevant and irrelevant, outdated information. Focusing on the specific content at fault, rather than blanketing out the entire page from search results, seems more precise and would minimize collateral loss of content.

There are other reasons to spare companies like Google from tailoring content to individual requests. The situation entails a double bind: Complying with a flood of page removal requests will be expensive and logistically difficult, but rejecting those

requests could lead to legal battles that are even more costly and cumbersome. Requests to remove content could not only clutter up the court system, but ironically also lead to cases that generate even more publicity around content that people are trying to hide.

Google should not have to needlessly contradict the purpose of a search engine in the name of privacy. The Court seems to have forgotten that Google functions as a processor and filter of online content, not a censor. Instead, the individuals and organizations that create web pages should determine what exists for search engines to display.

ART BY TERESA CHEN/FALCON ARTIST

f

By Varun Bhave

since a judge cannot miraculously subsume two perspectives that will always be at odds: the private interest in moving on from actions in the past that arguably no longer represent a person’s character, and the public interest in knowing about anything that could affect a decision to hire, vote for or date someone.

Plaintiffs in successful data removal cases have included a school principal who got a ticket for urinating in public and, in the EU case, a Spanish man who sought to remove a newspaper notice about the auction of his real estate to pay back debts. It does not seem reasonable that online information about a lack of personal hygiene and public decency, or poor financial choices, should be withheld from people like potential employers.

The ruling does not force websites to remove compromising information, but only requires Google to “hide” the web pages from search results. This puts an unfair burden on Google; the actual content is the problem, not the search engine. Individuals ought to take responsibility for regulating what is broadcast online about them. Anyone can take up a content issue with the operator of a website without entangling a corporate middleman like Google. The company should not be responsible for sweeping everyone’s private problems under the rug. If there are too many links to information someone wants removed to tackle individually, chances are he or she is a public figure, who the ruling does not protect, or the content he or she wishes to conceal is important.

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A9

FEATURE

Feature examines language barriers at TPHS, A11

Entertainment gives you a SoCal summer itinerary, A14-15

CAN YOU SEE

THAT I AM SICK? Sitting at her desk, laboring over her AP World History homework, Kristi* suddenly feels an intense pressure on her chest and begins to breathe heavily.

Panicked, she pushes her homework aside for the night and sits in a room filled with candles to calm herself, breathing slowly in and out. Once again, she fights against the daily attack of her anxiety.

“I have diagnosed anxiety disorder and [a] form of bipolar [disorder] and depression,” Kristi said. “I have random outbreaks and my heart starts beating, and I can’t breathe and it feels like there’s this weight on my chest. I can’t think, and I’ll have to stop doing my homework, and I have mood swings and high and low days.”

According to San Diego psychologist Daniel Singley, there are many causes and symptoms of mental illness like anxiety, all of which vary by individual.

“It is a spectrum,” Singley said. “The physical effects of mental illness depend from person to person.”

Genetic predisposition can also play a role in passing mental illness to a person either from outside, triggering events or circumstances or being born with a mental illness like depression from the beginning, according to Singley.

Kristi said that her symptoms are rooted in the psychological impact of a difficult middle school experience.

“In middle school I was bullied,” Kristi said. “I wanted to get out of middle and high school and just go to college. I put so much pressure on myself to go to college that I caused my own problem, just because I put this idea in my head. The bullying caused me to hate myself. I became really depressed.”

Similarly, Jane* believes self-imposed ideas combine with outside factors that aggravate her depression symptoms.

“You don’t just get depressed because you had a bad day, or [think you are] going to fail this final,’” Jane said. “It is more just because you have things that are not how they should be in your head, and other factors make it come out.”

Jane was diagnosed with depression during her sophomore year in 2012.

Around the time of her diagnosis, she was checked into both a mental hospital and an eating disorder rehabilitation facility, and she jumped off the Coronado Bridge in a suicide attempt later that year.

“I was having a really rough time at home, and I had just gotten out of eating disorder rehab, and I felt like nothing had changed at school or at home,” Jane said. “It was really ... life changing. My parents were more supportive and understanding after [my suicide attempt] because it was the shock they needed, and so were my friends.”

Kristi also experienced suicidal thoughts as a result of her depression.

“I have a really negative outlook on myself. I don’t really like myself most of the time because of [my illness],” Kristi said. “With the depression, there have been a couple times where I’ve had suicidal thoughts. There will be incidents where I will [feel] dead, and I will sit there emotionless and I don’t feel anything.”

Local psychotherapist and marriage counselor Reena Mittal, said people with mental illness often try to “self-soothe,” despite the benefits of speaking to a therapist or counselor. Even with such damaging symptoms, mental illnesses can largely go unnoticed by others — hence the name, the “invisible illness.”

“You can keep perfect grades, you can look like you have friends, you can appear super happy and have your life together and most people are really good at hiding it because no one wants to talk about it,” Jane said. “I definitely didn’t want to talk about it with people because I knew people would freak out.”

Kristi believes a lack of understanding and acceptance of her illness creates a barrier between her and others.

“Sometimes I’ll be in a bad mood so it will be hard to maintain relationships with people,” Kristi said. “When I have low days, I’ll get in fights with my friends and I’ll ignore them, and on my good days they are like ‘What’s happened to you?’ … People don’t get what having anxiety means … [Or] what anxiety or depression is. [Misunderstanding] makes them seem less severe than they really are, and it’s

really annoying. People think it’s just me being me, but I have no control of the situation.”

According to Mittal, people often do not consider mental illnesses as severe as physical maladies.

“There is stigma attached to mental illnesses,” Mittal said. “They feel like there is something wrong with them. When they have a physical illness, or a broken arm, they do not mind going to a doctor.”

Mittal said people confuse momentary sadness with diagnosed depression due to a general lack of understanding surrounding mental illness.

“I think the difference is that some people can still feel depressed and sad, but what makes people with [clinical] depression and anxiety different is that the sadness persists,” Mittal said. “If you cannot focus on something for two weeks or feel sad for two weeks, we see the difference there.”

Mental illness does not only affect the ill person but also the people he or she is surrounded by. Lea’s* father, a retired marine, developed post traumatic stress disorder when he returned home from his two deployments to Iraq and three to Afghanistan. Since then, his behavior and personality have changed radically and even led him to file for divorce.

“I can say he is not the same person,” Lea said. “There was a change in emotional behavior [when he came home]. He would always be very warlike and think there were bombs or shooters in the sky. His thoughts were weak and he had a lot of self-doubt like ‘Is that guy trying to attack me?’... PTSD really creeps up on people, and their families. It divides everyone and affects more than just that person.”

Lea said that her father’s PTSD made her life “a lot more difficult,” and the experience has changed her outlook on adversity in general.

“It’s affected me a lot,” Lea said. “I’m short tempered with people. When I hear people talk about their problems, I roll my eyes and get angry. It affected me with school. It was hard to focus, and I didn’t care as much. I would get a bad grade and let it go and not ask my teachers for help. A lot of people were frustrated at me because I didn’t know how to ask for help.”

However, Lea has not allowed her father’s PTSD to affect her memories of him.

“I know all of his actions are not the real him, but I know it is never going to change,” Lea said. “You can’t take away the images you see in war. I still look at him like the dad I always cared for and he always cared for me ... I still do love him as a father, but I love the way I used to love him.”

There are resources available for students at TPHS to talk about feelings of sadness, anger, fear or being overwhelmed. Teachers, counselors and school psychologists are available.

“I’ve never directly referred a student to a psychologist, but I might suggest that they find someone they can talk with,” Peer Assistant Listeners teacher Don Collins said. “I might be able to point out or help see what is happening ... It may assist [them], help them feel less anxious to let them feel like they have an ally.”

TPHS school psychologist Julia Johnson said depression and anxiety because of school, social life or family are universal human emotions and reactions.

“Some students with deep concerns are resourceful enough to seek us out on their own, through a school directory or something like that,” Johnson said.

“Occasionally, concerns are significant enough that we do an evaluation and might be able to offer services ranging from academic support to counseling or alternative placements.”

“If you know someone who struggles with [a mental illness], don’t try to make their problems seem smaller than yours,” Kristi said. “Even when it’s just a surface level thing, just take a second and try to listen to them.”

Even if the heaviness in Kristi’s chest persists, with the help of others, she strives not to be bound by her illness nor the misconceptions surrounding it. *Name changed to protect identity

by Caroline Rutten and Hanrui Zhang ART BY SARAH KIM/FALCONER

tphsfalconer.com

feature

the falconer

A11

TONGUE-TIED 11% of students are not fluent in their home language

After South Vietnam fell to the Viet Cong in 1975, Cole Nguyen’s (9) parents English, so it’s a lot easier that way,” Merida said. “I think it’s good that I fled to the United States to escape the communist government. Nguyen, a first- speak Spanish at home, too, for professional reasons like maintaining both generation Vietnamese American, maintained contact with his ethnic heritage languages for jobs . [It’s] important to speak [Spanish] in my family especially during his early years by learning Vietnamese, though his parents did not because at family reunions we always speak Spanish, [and] being bilingual “push hard” to teach their children the language. helps with getting good jobs.”

“At an early age we were spoken to in Vietnamese and just naturally learned Chang-Liu said that unless parents or students, who are often busy with it,” Nguyen said. academics and extracurricular activities, seek out fluency in Chinese, learning According to TPHS Chinese teacher Katherine Chang-Liu, a child’s ability the language “just gets shuffled under everything.” Chang-Liu, a firstto fluently speak his or her home language depends largely on the degree of generation Chinese American who grew up in Los Angeles as well as Taiwan, parents’ efforts to teach their children. Although many students in all levels of realized the importance of embracing the Chinese language and culture. her classes are first-generation Chinese Americans, their experiences with the “I dealt with what a lot of [Chinese Americans] deal with, like dual identities language differ greatly. and dual cultures and dual languages,” Chang-Liu said. “There’s a point in “Some parents make a concerted effort to speak Chinese at home and to your life when you think, ‘I don’t want to speak Chinese. Why do I have to be expose their children to the Chinese culture or expect the kids to answer them Chinese and speak Chinese?’ As teenagers we figure out who we are, and you’re in Chinese,” Chang-Liu said. “Some [students’] grandparents live with them, just trying to fit in. Sometimes Chinese doesn’t seem like it slips in naturally. so they have to speak Chinese, some students [largely] speak to their parents But when you’re older you come to a point when you want to be fluent in your in English. I have students whose listening, reading, writing and speaking native language. You don’t have to sell out one [identity] for the other.” are all good and others whose listening is okay, but their speaking isn’t great While being bilingual has professional uses, it also allows for cultural because [their parents] speak to them in Chinese and they reply in English.” assimilation. Nguyen’s visit to Vietnam contributed to his appreciation of Chang-Liu also said that many of her higherVietnamese culture and his belief that “kids are better level students have previously attended off-campus off when they are not limited to speaking only one Chinese schools or have the opportunity to improve language.” their Chinese due to frequent visits to extended family “People in Vietnam seemed much closer and more members who live in China or Taiwan. social with one another [than in the United States],” All of Nguyen’s extended family lives in the United Nguyen said. “Their tone toward strangers seemed States, and he has only visited Vietnam once, in much more welcoming than that of [the United 2012, “because [his] family wanted to take [him and States]. The only words I could understand were about his sister] to see what Vietnam looks like.” Since his directions and ordering food, but other than that I could childhood, he has lost most of his ability to speak the understand only 5 percent of a conversation.” language.

For some, the motivation to connect with one’s ethnic “I stopped speaking Vietnamese when I started heritage still has not emerged with age, like Changkindergarten,” Nguyen said. “At the time I only knew fiancé, whose Chinese immigrant parents made Katherine Chang-Liu Liu’s Vietnamese and my parents started speaking English less of an effort to teach him Chinese. ������� to help me learn it faster but did not mix Vietnamese “When [my fiancé] went to college, he took two years and English when they talked to me.” of heritage Chinese, but he was so busy and had to focus While Nguyen does not remember Vietnamese, he still connects with on [his major],” Chang-Liu said. “For him, Chinese is kind of a side effect: relatives and does not aspire to be part of a crowd at school that speaks the ‘When I go home, I speak to my mom in Chinese — it’s just a fact of life.’ It’s language. But, he still wishes he had remained fluent. part of his identity, but it’s not something on the forefront.” “[Not knowing the language] prevents me from participating in certain Nguyen, Morales, Merida and Chang-Liu all plan to teach their children cultural events like Chinese New Year events, when you have to listen to their native languages. speeches and answer questions in Vietnamese,” Nguyen said. “I do wish I still “Growing up in America, [there is] a conflict between Chinese culture, remembered it, because I could communicate with more people more easily in which is all about conforming, and Western culture, which is all about having and outside school. Some of my close friends are Vietnamese speakers, so when your own identity and being yourself,” Chang-Liu said. “I hope I can make it a I have dinner [with their families] I am not able to speak to their parents.” little easier on [my kids]. Learning Chinese is not so stale, and can be fun and Brooklyn Morales’ (10) father, the first of his family born in the United cool, but I think people don’t give it its due credit because it can be hard, or States, is fluent in both Spanish and English, but “never got around” to people have had bad experiences with it in the past.” teaching his daughters Spanish, according to Brooklyn, something that, unlike Nguyen and his parents hope he will relearn Vietnamese before he finishes Nguyen, has prevented her from connecting with her grandmother and uncle. college.

“My grandma speaks a little bit of broken English. It’s kind of frustrating “Around my relatives and grandparents, I am a different person, not when [my relatives] have conversations [and] I don’t really know what’s going as talkative and much more aware of what I say and how I sound to other on or what’s being said,” Morales said. “And at family reunions, I’m always just people,” Nguyen said. “It is very embarrassing when people ask me to speak sitting there, confused … while everyone is just conversing in Spanish.”

[Vietnamese] and I cannot.”

Stephanie Merida (12), fluent in both Spanish and English, has had little Perhaps upon Nguyen’s next opportunity to visit Vietnam, he will be able trouble embracing her Hispanic-American identity. to connect with the culture and history of the home his parents left years ago.

“I speak in Spanish to my parents because they don’t really know a lot of

by Katie Page and Emily Sun

”

I dealt with ... dual identities and dual cultures and dual languages ... You dont have to sell out one [identity] for the other.

ART BY SARAH KIM/FALCONER

A12 the falconer

feature

june 5, 2014

making it C

L

Sitting in front of a computer screen, Melinda Wang (11) holds a simple conversation in English, via video chat, with a student on the other side of the world.

Wang tutors fifth and sixth graders in India and high school students in China and is the vice president of international operations for Education Beyond the Classroom, an online tutoring organization composed of volunteer high school student-tutors whose goal is “to provide a strong educational foundation for children and youth, preparing them to be valuable, contributing members of society,” according to its website. Wang contacts schools, teachers and educational program coordinators around the world to set up access to EBTC services. Thus far, EBTC serves San Diego, Mexico, India and China.

“Tutoring is always a good experience to help [the tutors] review what [they] previously learned,” Wang said. “It also makes [tutors] think more about connecting with the other person and how [they] phrase words to help them understand because some people can’t understand certain methods while other people need more repetition or examples.”

Other online tutoring services are also becoming popular, like subscription service InstaEDU, which connects tutors and students from all over the world and covers more than 2,500 subjects in a range of academic levels.

Alex Kasa (‘09), psychology major and education minor at the University of California, Santa Barbara Technology Management Program, tutors high school and college students from 14 to 22 through InstaEDU. He teaches a wide range of subjects, including psychology and entrepreneurship, and helps high school students with college essays and applications.

“To become a[n] [InstaEDU] tutor, you sign in through Facebook and submit an application about your college, academic accomplishments, teaching experience and extracurricular activities,” Kasa said. “InstaEDU filters through applicants and selects the best and brightest tutors.”

According to Laura Oppenheimer, director of marketing at InstaEDU, the company was created because the founders realized that the traditional tutoring industry could not serve most students —because of both cost and rigid time structure.

“I have been tutored in person multiple times, but it seemed to be harder to fit into my tutor’s schedule,” Tyla Sass (11) said. “Tutoring in person means organizing a set time in both [people’s] schedules to meet face to face. Sometimes tutoring in person doesn’t work for many reasons, for example, the tutor can’t make it at the last minute.”

Online tutoring can be done at any time, however, even between students and tutors in different time zones, because there are always tutors available somewhere in the world.

“Even if it is 1:00 in the morning and you need help writing an essay or need help cramming for your math test the next morning, they can and will help you learn the material,” Simon Ilko (11) said.

In order to find tutors, subscribers simply access the InstaEDU website, find the subject they need help in, and select a tutor from the list that appears.

I

C K

“What really attracted me about InstaEDU is that I can work whenever I want because students are always looking for help,” Kasa said.

Online tutoring sessions last as long as students need them to, which differs from traditonal tutoring, in which students are charged by a set time schedule, usually only by the hour and often for a series of sessions. InstaEDU subscribers are charged weekly for cumulative tutoring time through the credit card that is required when they subscribe. “[InstaEDU] does not require a regular commitment, so if [students] just want a little bit of help, they can do a 10- or 15-minute lesson,” Oppenheimer said. “Because students don’t pay for their tutor’s time to get to their house, we can make our tutoring a lot more affordable, starting at just $24 per hour,” Oppenheimer said.

In order to recreate the in-person tutoring experience, InstaEDU provides a variety of tools and resources.

“Once a student and tutor enter a lesson, they have access to an online lesson space that has everything needed to replicate an in-person lesson, including video, audio and text chat; a collaborative whiteboard; text editor; code editor and screen sharing,” Oppenheimer said.

The resources offered by EBTC are similar to those InstaEDU uses, like Skype and iDroo, an online education whiteboard, but more limited.

“What’s hard about [online tutoring] is that a lot of [geographic] areas that need support don’t have access to the Internet or technology, so it kind of ruins the point of online tutoring sometimes,” Wang said. “Another thing that’s hard is that you don’t have a shared paper to write on. You can’t exactly directly teach them and help them with homework unless they send you all the problems.”

Oppenheimer said that in a recent survey of students who use InstaEDU more than 90 percent reported better grades, less stress and more confidence in their classes after using an InstaEDU tutor.

Most of the people Ilko has introduced to online tutoring have preferred it to in-person tutoring because of their growing reliance on technology and its lack of restrictions.

“As people grow more and more confident and trusting in online services in general, it’s natural for interest in online tutoring to grow, too,” Oppenheimer said. “Also, features like video and audio chat make online tutoring closer and closer to replicating the experience of in-home tutoring — without the typical high cost.”

The global demand for tutoring has also helped open up opportunities for online tutoring services and organizations.

“EBTC is expanding to other [schools in and near our service areas] that tend not to have very well-educated teachers and students because they’re poor communities,” Wang said.

By utilizing innovative ideas and ever-expanding technology, online tutoring has grown to match up students and tutors who may be thousands of miles apart but are linked through the virtual world.

by Sarah Kim and Alice Qu

ART BY SARAH CHAN/FALCONER

off to

Neverland college map 2014

University of Washington Tiffany Lan Joey Lasensky Natalie Rice

Hunter Willoughby Carson McBride Argerey Stapakis

Gonzaga University Max Donkin

University of Oregon Matt Carroll Mariel Cathcart Laura Detrow

Hannah Dobson Abby Glenn Chau Quach

University of Portland

College of Idaho

John Roussos

Kyle Ashby

Oregon State University

Brigham Young University Online Pathway Program

James Grow Renzo Vajda

Ember Ely

University of Nevada, Las Vegas Skyler Mena

Casey Wood

Creighton University

Colorado Mesa University

Belle Montmorency

Eli Suhadolnik

University of Colorado Boulder Utah State University Jacob Neeley

University of Utah

Chad Crabtree Kevin Hadley Justin Murray Alexis Ostermann

Devin Slubowski Chloe Fogg Cameron Carter

University of Denver

Ryan Bliss Maddy Hegedus

Shea Geary

Brigham Young University Bryce Kormylo

Colorado School of Mines Calvin Swanson

Colorado State University Nikunj Vashi

University of Arizona Drew Dohn Alyssa Durant Dominick Ingrassia

Parker Lanning Kenny Mares Erin Schmitt

University of Tulsa Anna Buga

Arizona State University Marissa DiMeo Christopher Hoang

Joey Jones Thomas Morgan

Northern Arizona University Riley Gebing

University of North Texas School of Music Kurtis Shaffer

Southern Methodist University

Madi Coughlin Caroline Jensen Bronson Massas

Jacqueline Putegnat Kyla Wechsler Cooper Wildeson

Texas Christian University Kelly Jacobi

Munich EF Academic Year Abroad

Baylor University

Madeline Heidt

Katlyn Simon

American University of Paris Lauren Bickford

Brigham Young University - Hawaii Cary Nichols Kathryn Page

Folkehøgskole Norwegian Folk School Sabrina Turner

Gap Year

Eli Bessudo Serina Patel

Shota Jernigan

Concordia University Sam Vaux Nick Barnes

Heidelberg University Hassan Al Deiri

McGill University Mitch Baker

Sophia University University of British Columbia Tess Baker

Evan Kallenberg

University of Cambridge Joshua Send

University of Manchester Emma Salazar

Frederic Beaulieu

University of New South Wales Maia Marriott

Waseda University Alex Schmidt Lisa Shingo Narumi Watanabe

Cornell University

Justin Lio

Bowdoin College

Syracuse University

Maura Friedlander

Chelsea Mapes

New York Institute of Technology

Mitali Chansarkar

University of Minnesota - Twin Cities

Columbia University

Jinmeng Liu

Dartmouth College

Tal Braude

New York University Alex Deng Lucy Han MinJi Kim

University of Wisconsin - Green Bay Mitchell Oliver

Marquette University

Grinnell College David H. Chang

Sonja Spain

Alexa Charles Mahan Chitgari Nurie Kim

Lucy Liang

Mira Kinebuchi Ryan Pifer

Calvin College

Pablo Benavidez Aviles Aimee Stephenson

Courtney Coate

Jake Heilbrunn

Purdue University

Antoni Lee Achinthya Soordelu Brett Moore

Princeton University

DoWon Dan Kim

Ferial Behboody

University of Delaware

Jacob Lyon

Rachel Oh

Wake Forest University

Jay Park

Rachel Lewis

Saint Louis University

Rakin Nasar

University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill

David Pan

University of Tennessee at Martin Samantha Hill

Johns Hopkins University Amy Chen

University of Richmond

Savannah Kelly

University of Notre Dame

Sameeha Zele

Anna Nunes

Denison University

Regan Richards

Kacey McKinnon

Campbell University Amelia Armstrong

Georgetown University Luke Djavaherian

Boston University Gabi Arriaga Kate D’Arcy

Joonho Han Peter Khaw

Massachussetts Institute of Technology Hiram Moncivais

Western New England University Grace Trupe

Tufts University

University of Alabama Meaghan Baril Walker Bowen Zoe Eprile

Shannon Lee

Ohio State University

Indiana University Bloomington

Tomas Contreras

Rutgers University

Cassie Sun

University of Pittsburgh

Alan Lai Pailin Rakpepsi Ruttanasupagid

Washington University in St. Louis

Danielle Lyle

Madison Cavanagh

Jade Park

Madeleine Ho

Yale University

Jennifer Peng

Villanova University

University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign

Adam Bulow

Bryce Cady

University of Pennsylvania

School of the Art Institute of Chicago

University of Chicago

Bryant University

Pennsylvania State University

Chul Hoon Park

Carol Chang

Megan Lenehan

City University of New York John Jay College of Criminal Justice

Angela Chen

Wheaton College

Rhode Island School of Design

Sam Hardeman

University of Michigan

Macy Vrabel

Minji Kim Jamie Sung Justin G. Wang

St. Johns University

Owen Weselak

Iowa State University

Tony Soto

Tyler Mathews Richard Terry

Connor Lansdale

College of Charleston Allison Bunce

Taylor Nordan

Brandeis University Aline Gonicman Sang Min (Kevin) Lee

Jonathan Kim

Emerson College

Emory University

Elliot Patrick

Julia Skyhar Sophia Wang

Boston College Hyun Yang

Smith College Stephanie Xie

Williams College Timmy Suh

University of Miami Kiernan Emkjer

Erik McKee

Harvard University Alex Kahng

Northeastern University Zack Blumkin Sophia Choi Yara Gosula

Oriana Ren Emma Wong

UTE !!!!!

California Polytechnic State University, San Luis Obispo Zach Applegate Devin Bodmer Sierra Casper Erin Champ Trevor Colbert Ian Dickson Mikaela Duhs Gianna Giacalone Shannon Heinrich

Megan Hermer Chase Johns McKenna Lewry Crystal Lore Alex McCracken Karla Mercado Pearu Pold Cheyenne Tucker Kyler Watkins

California State University, Fresno Natalie Chaffin Jack Kuzminsky

Apoorva Mylavarapu Frank Pan Daniella Park Steven Shao Corey Shaun Steven Takahashi Justin Wang Michael Weyant Emily Wolking Kathryn Yang KC Yeagley Serin You

Jackie Antoun Kitae Bae Shelby Barduson Charles Bieler Reily Buechler Olivia Golston Alex Issa Marina Kemper Joshua Kim Jenny Kwak Henry Lee Brandon Liu

San Diego State University

Saint Mary’s College of California Christina Shubat Alec Mills

University of Southern California Lauren Bickford Sara Doudar Emma Dyson Daniela Glaser Neta Glaser Rama Soares Reddy Gosula Peter Hollen Soraya Homayounfar

Elaina Howe Henry Ji Jourdan Johnson Mitchell King Tara Manoogian Chris Pittard Justin Sheppard Collin Dewey

San Francisco State University Natasha Bolton Andrew Donahue Ryan Doyle

University of California, Los Angeles

Karen Luu Jonah Martinez Zenia Trombacco

University of California, Santa Barbara Lexi Briggs Michael Cao Steven Chih Sarah Choi Trevor Crowell Patrick Foran Maria Ginzburg Taylor Goldman Ellen Gunnarsson Winston Hsu Alexis Jacobs

Ryan Kemper Annie La Erika Martinez Jessica Perron Zoe Purcell Faith Reineck Madeline Sloan Danielle Watson Daniel Weiser Sam Worman

Scripps College Hana Vogel

Occidental College Cory Lomberg

Wendy Beltran Ricky Corbin Jack Dempsey Audrey Gompf Brian Graybill Haley King Ryan Koehler Georgia Lacey

Peter Lee Gabi Meltz David Miller Marisa Montalbano Austin Nicholson Emma Parella Katie Sanders Tyler Valdes

University of California, Berkeley Nada Al-Alusi Lucy An Sarah Bhattacharjee Bhavani Bindiganavile Brian Choi Camille Doan Natalie Dunn Cole Fargo Claudio Ghetti Jake Goena Ruochen Huang William Johnson

Lora Khatib Vincent Kwan Nick Leslie Drake Levy Danielle Li Thomas Mackey Layla Mazdyasni Shayun Pedram Andrew Sweet Lexie Tatro Maddie Tencer Allie Zimmer

University of California, San Diego Joseph Ayoub Aishwarya Bhadada Ashley Chau Megan Chang David J. Chang Selena Chen Gareth Disler Jennifer Grundman Ameera Haque Liz Izhikevich Akhil Jain

Noah Kim Kevin Klein Tiffany La Jessica Lee Danny Lim Alexander Pu Lia Signaevskaia Rebecca Seaberry Evan Tanuwidjaja Jonathan Tran Jeffrey Wong

Sonoma State University

Claremont McKenna College

Mariann Bukich Brianna Gilliam

California State University, Long Beach

MiraCosta College

Harshita Nadimpalli Kyle Le

Julia Seacat

Sabrina Silva

Pomona College Kelsey Buchanan Leonard Chen Rob Simsiman

Loyola Marymount University Spencer Colburn

Leila Zein

California State University, Northridge Emily Barrett

Santa Clara University Pete Mitchell

Athena Snyder

California State Polytechnic University, Pomona Atsushi Domyo

Stanford University Sidney Brown

Noa Glaser

University of California, Merced Brandon Read

Menlo College Jaagriti Sharma

Skyela Horne Kylie Robinson

Alec Berry Taylor Chatwin Mona Hakim Leopold Hendle Ji Wook Hyun Yuliya Ivanova Daniela Klausner Nicholas Koeneke Arie-El Paamoni

Rebecca Pendergrass Meliza Perez Matt Perkins Katarina Svinterud Akhilesh Sai Vemuri Chih Ting Wang Cheree White Natalie Youngblood

San Diego City College Stephanie Merida

Biola University

Catherine Carl

Santa Monica College Casey Monaghan

San Diego Mesa College Yun Hwan Choi Selin Ergun

Blancis Jhandi Taylor Napier

Santa Barbara City College Miguel Flores Mike Fogel Desiraye Hines Dwayne Hines

Jenna Lampe Amanda Low Rachel Watson

Point Loma Nazarene University Marcus Mann

University of California, Santa Cruz Dide Su Bilgin Kevin Canote Ted Cheung Jennifer Fineman Tim Gleeson

Naim Kasira Michael Lewis Luke Sampiere Jenny Tumay

University of San Diego

Veronika Peterka Sofia Polonia Camelia Tirandazi

Daisy Aguilar Tara Bosstick Blake Kubicka Emily May

University of California, Riverside Stanley Brownlee David Chung Priya Garcia Edward Janaban

Taeho Kim Brian Ko Rishi Kodukula

University of California, Irvine Alla Ahmad Heejun Chough Joleen Hsu Zach Lachiusa

Felix Lee Tianhao Wu Jimmy Yue

University of California, Davis Madison Cohen Patrick Koeneke Liam Kussman Kenny Lee Suryadeep Mankatala

Achi Mishra Nicolaus Nazarenkov Kevin Xia Bethany Yeap

San Jose State University

Erin Amyer Lizeth Garcia

Mackenzie Pope

U.S. Marine Corps, Base Camp Pendleton Michael Moralez

Art Institute of California, Orange County Brandon Durgana

California State University, Monterey Bay Jack Silverwood

California State University, San Marcos Tristan Bledsoe

Chapman University Daniel Freifeld Lauren Freund Chad Johnson

Laura Kojima Caroline Malcolm

Palomar College Tyler Carender Samantha Lizarraga

Gabriel Driollet (Fire Academy)

Humboldt State University Laura Black

Whittier College Alvaro Bravo

Pepperdine University Matthew Benton

University of the Pacific Lynn Kang

Peter Kuntz

California State University, Chico Gigi Gonzalez Daisy Saldivar

Alexandra St. Laurent Brittany Todd

California College of the Arts Luis Manuel Tovar Zarate

Westmont College Lillian Chen

University of San Francisco Vanessa Chen

Darian Lau

California Maritime Academy Christian Navigato

DISCLAIMER: The Falconer staff has spent weeks soliciting the post-high school plans of all seniors.

The deadline for submissions was June 1. These maps include the information provided to us. The Falconer is not responsible for re-printing the map on account of any errors.

feature

tphsfalconer.com

in

At TPHS, most students meet their language requirement by taking courses in Spanish, Chinese, French or Japanese.

Abishek Chozhan (10) operates under the same requirements, but he also spends his free time learning a different language: code, the language of computers.

“You can see [coding] as a language because you’re talking to the computer,” Chozhan said. “That’s the way you control a computer, [and communication between] two objects or people is a language.”

Chozhan has been interested in all aspects of technology, including code, for many years, but during his freshman year he devoted himself to learning various coding languages.

“The ability to control [technology] has become important and fundamental,” Chozhan said. “So, I figured I should start learning it.”

Though he attended a few classes on coding outside of school, most of Chozhan’s knowledge has come from self-study via a variety of Internet resources — around 100, he estimates. After he became proficient in Java, C and C++ languages and the markup HTML, Chozhan decided to found the Hawaiian Toast Network, a technology review website he created with three of his colleagues, Corey Hu (10), Salman Sadakadulla (9) and Dane Malangone (10).

“I started [the Hawaiian Toast Network] because I wanted to write my opinion on technology and the [programs] that are becoming a part of our everyday lives,” Chozhan said.

After navigating through some flaws in the original, the four-man team chose to recode the website under a new name, “TheTechByte,” which is scheduled for launch in about a month. They plan to focus on creating more content and fixing the

issues they found with the original network.

Chozhan also works on independent projects, which are commissioned by private companies. He has made websites for various restaurants, including Bon Bon Bakery, since closed, and a local swimming coach. Chozhan is currently volunteering his time to create a website for the Thirst Project, a nonprofit organization that drills wells in developing nations to provide water to rural communities.

Chozhan is also a council member for TPHS Speech and Debate and an active member of the Congressional Debate team.

“I didn’t plan on joining Congress, but I did grab the application form for it,” Chozhan said. “There were tryouts and I was free, so I decided to go. I got in and I [have been involved since then].”

Chozhan plans to continue to practice and improve his skills in debate, but he has greater goals for his coding career.

Along with attending a few “hackathons,” which are intense technology and software collaborations, and learning more coding languages, he intends to release an application he will work on over the summer. “[The application] is a news app that essentially uses algorithms to find the news each individual user reads the most,” Chozhan said.

His inspiration for the application stems from an issue he sees in other news applications, media Twitter accounts and websites, where a single large story can dominate and overwhelm media and make it difficult to read other stories.

“Instead of having a list of articles with a bunch of repeats like Flipboard and news aggravators, my app will show topics instead of articles and quick information under each topic,” Chozhan said.

Whether he is speaking to computers in code or fellow “senators” in congressional debate, Chozhan continues to pursue success in a variety of languages.

by Russell Reed

Abishek Chozhan (10) English (Honors) AP English Lit

AP English Lang AP US History

AP Euro/World Languages

Xiaohong (Sarah) Song

买房， 卖房， 房屋管理 全职， 尽责， 诚信可靠 16870 W. Bernardo Dr, Suite 400 San Diego, CA 92127 www.AbacusPropertiesInc.com

Pursuing his passion for coding, Abishek Chozhan created with his peers a technology review website called the Hawaiian Toast Network.

Realtor DRE Lic # 01899675

Biology

Chemistry Physics

AP Biology

AP Chemistry AP Physics B/C AP Enviro Sc

Algebra I/Geo

Mobile: 858-345-7281 E-mail: x.song@yahoo.com

Algebra II/Trig Precalculus

AP Calculus

LEAP

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Credentialed Teachers All levels - Middle, High School & AP Flexible hours, evenings & weekends

anne@leapaheadtutoring.com 858 336 6514! www.leapaheadtutoring.com 568 Stevens Ave Solana Beach CA 92075

LEAP AH TUTORING

TUTORING

I must have been a comical sight, shuffling furiously across the hotel floor in fuzzy slippers and disheveled pajamas, my unbrushed hair madly flying. It was ridiculous, I thought; we had flown all the way here to compete, and yet here I was, having somehow slept through my alarm, waking up a dangerously impressive two minutes before we were scheduled to play against a team that likely would be somber and formally dressed.

That’s how managing to survive this far into my junior year has felt — hectic and scrappy and a little bit absurd.

Everyone says that juniors have it the hardest. I’d face SATs and AP Physics B, and larger responsibilities on the Falconer and JOURNYS and Quizbowl while piecing together my plans for the looming college application process. So, I steeled myself for a rough school year, color coding my binders and painstakingly planning out my agenda.

But soon, whether due to my workload or because of mere laziness or maybe a combination of the two, my organization degenerated. I lost my planner on several occasions, my binders filled up with loose papers, and soon I eschewed my overfilled binders altogether for a haphazard stack of papers stuffed into my bag.

It’s only now, writing this column in Jennifer Grundman’s place, that I recognize how little time I’ve allowed myself for introspection. Sophomore year was difficult, but I had “Asides” every month to force me to look up from my work and examine myself.

I thought I knew who I was this morning, but I’ve just become aware of how much I’ve changed since then. Without this space to periodically trace out my thoughts, I feel a wide disconnection between the person I was when I wrote “Asides” last June. When I reread my old columns for some sort of inspiration, to somehow slip back into the flow from which I had stepped out a little over 365 days ago, I realized I could no longer speak for her.

And there’s no telling who I will be in a year.

ONE 2,770

A13

LEAP AHEAD

ASIDES

By EMILY SUN

the falconer

ENTERTAINMENT

Sound Off: film, live music and poetry all in one, downtown A17

SUMMER EDITION Summer is just around the corner, so our very own Falconer staffers have some great suggestions for day trips, both close to home and a little farther afield. Read on to find spots filled with cool art, and food from all cultures. Pick up one of our recommended books and make a getaway right in your own home.

SAN DIEGO

LOS ANGELES

And the Mountains Echoed Khaled Hosseini Hosseini has done it again, perhaps even better than before. The novel starts out small, then becomes a sprawling epic. An impoverished Afghan laborer gives his 3-year-old daughter, Pari, to a rich family, separating her from her beloved brother and setting off a chain of repercussions that spawn a series of unexpected, overlapping narratives that span six decades and jump from Afghanistan to San Francisco, Paris and the Greek Isle of Tinos. Hosseini covers so much ground and the characters are so poignantly developed, that when it comes time to say goodbye, it is nearly impossible not to feel a tug at the heartstrings.

But as you move forward, each of the story’s connections is even more fulfilling than the last.

BOOKS Bossypants Tina Fey

Tina Fey has already cemented herself as one of the greatest living comedians, to which her bucketload of Emmys and Mark Twain Prize for Humor can attest. But Fey has remained notoriously reserved about her private life, reluctant to put anything out into the public except her comedy. This is precisely what makes Bossypants, Fey’s autobiography, such compelling reading. After years of privacy, Fey is not afraid to delve into the issues of gender and sexism as they pertain to her experiences in Hollywood. She opens up and reveals fascinating insights on her time as showrunner at “Saturday Night Live” and “30 Rock” and recounts her childhood and rise to fame. Oh, and it is all really, really funny.

The World According to Garp John Irving Though published in 1978, The World According to Garp is still so weird, inappropriate, hilarious and shockingly disturbing that you should go get a copy immediately after you finish reading this issue. In it, T.S. Garp grows up and becomes interested in sex, wrestling and writing fiction.

His mother, in the process, becomes a famous feminist. Garp tries to protect his children from the inevitable dangers of the world, including the alltoo-recognizable neighborhood asshole who drives too fast. Garp learns to become tolerant of all sorts of different people in intertwining plot lines that are as raw as they are funny, including a friendship with transsexual football player Roberta Muldoon. Confusing, but all the while worth it.

words by alex jen and charu sinha/falconer

entertainment

tphsfalconer.com

the falconer A15

ART

Southern California is awash with great art — and not just paintings of half-naked muses or marble sculptures of Greek gods. Here, we present to you some cool, “I cannot believe that is art” art at the easy-to-get-to Los Angeles County Museum of Art. This guide offers only a taste, so put on some comfy shoes and take a trip to the museum yourself.

Breathing Light James Turrell

Metropolis II Chris Burden

I know, it is just a white room at first — but take off your shoes, walk up the inclined floor, and wait for the spectrum of colored light to start. Soon enough, you all lose all sense of depth perception and feel like you are “breathing light,” so to speak. © JAMES TURRELL. © 2014 PACE GALLERY, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Flashback to your childhood years with Metropolis II. Steel beams and wooden building blocks support a city with 18 roadways, including one six-lane freeway, down which approximately 100,000 matchbox cars zoom every hour. © CHRIS BURDEN. COURTESY GAGOSIAN GALLERY

Cold Shoulder Roy Lichtenstein This is exactly what you do not want to see on a first date. Still, Lichtenstein’s use of comic book Ben-Day dots and a faceless greeting gives this work a depersonalized nature and cool emotional overtones.

Get lost in this 183-ton ribbon of weathered steel that stands almost 13 feet tall and undulates with unexpected ease. “Band” is aware of its titanic size and quite literally owns the space, but still manages to proffer some sense of aesthetic simplicity that fully engages the viewer.

Band Richard Serra

FOOD

WORDS BY ALEX JEN/FALCONER ART BY MEGAN LENEHAN/FALCONER

Yuko Kitchen

Up2You Cafe

5484 Wilshire Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90036

7770 Vickers St #101, San Diego, CA 92111

Tucked away on the Miracle Mile only a few steps from the LACMA, Yuko Kitchen exudes an earthy ambience reminiscent of the rainforest. After a trek through the museum, the Japanese cafe is the perfect place to socialize with friends and still do what Los Angeles people do best - stay healthy. Most dishes are $10-$20, and the Garlic Albacore Sashimi Salad is highly recommended.

Of all the boba places in San Diego, Up2You is consistently the one to beat. With a variety of teas, blended drinks, desserts and funky light fixtures, this quirky cafe is another reason why Convoy Street is such an unforgettable dining location. Though getting a table can be tricky on weekend evenings, the small location’s bustling atmosphere adds another dimension to its Mason jar merit.

Pannikin Coffee & Tea

Diamond Jamboree

7467 Girard Ave, La Jolla, CA 92037

2700-2750 Alton Pkwy, Irvine, CA 92606

Located next to D.G. Wills Bookstore, home of the La Jolla Cultural Society, Pannikin La Jolla has a natural allure for artists, musicians and writers of all kinds. With its eclectic staff that brews up the best coffee of any Pannikin location in the area, the La Jolla shop has a certain quality that makes the time one lingers inside it the best-spent hours of any day.

A multicultural dining center near the University of California, Irvine campus, Diamond Jamboree brings quality Asian food to the area. The center provides dining experiences for all, from the casual cafe Guppy House to the upscale Chinese restaurant, Capital Seafood. The most notable of the eateries is 85°C, a Taiwanese bakery with lines that never seem to end.

Fritto Misto Italian Cafe

Encinitas Cafe

601 Colorado Ave, Santa Monica, CA 90401 After walking and shopping along 3rd Street Promenade in Santa Monica, finish the day off with style at Fritto Misto Italian Cafe. Its unique option of make-your-own pasta and the large number of vegetarian dishes will satisfy everyone. Its most popular dish is the Jumbo Ravioli with garlic sauce, which will have you regretting absolutely nothing.

531 S Coast Highway 101, Encinitas, CA 92024 It is no secret that, during the summer, blueberry pancakes and deep-dish, diner-style cinnamon rolls are appropriate meals anytime between early morning and late evening. If there is a single, best place to experience such scrumptious, stomach-padding carbohydrates at 8:30 p.m. after a day spent at the beach, Encinitas Cafe is most certainly it.

WORDS BY SARAH BROWN AND KATIE MULKOWSKY/FALCONER ART BY ALICE QU/FALCONER

A16 the falconer

entertainment

june 5, 2014

‘A Million Ways to Die’ of Boredom PHOTO COURTESY OF UNIVERSAL PICTURES

Seth MacFarlane has, rather impressively, made a career out of being an a--hole. His signature snide, envelope-pushing breed of humor characterizes every project he pursues. From the unapologetic mess that is “Family Guy” to the surprisingly smart “Ted,” everything MacFarlane touches turns to snark. And, as his polarizing Academy Awards hosting gig evidenced, MacFarlane is not only entirely aware that his cynical shtick is geared to offend, but he also takes obvious delight in it. Basically, MacFarlane may be an a--hole, but he is a self-aware a-hole, who knows he can make you laugh despite yourself.

So why has MacFarlane done everything in his power to refute his reputation as a funny douchebag in his newest movie, “A Million Ways to Die in the West”?

MacFarlane stars as wimpy sheepherder Albert Stark, who lives in Arizona in 1882, but whose tiring sarcasm registers more as Bushwick in 2014. His shallow girlfriend Louise (Amanda Seyfried) leaves him for the mustachioed Foy (Neil Patrick Harris) in the first few minutes, and Albert spends the rest of the movie attempting to win her back with the help of mysterious Anna (Charlize Theron), who — unbeknownst to him — is married to the infamous bandit Clinch (Liam Neeson). If this plot sounds hollow to you, that’s because it is.

The impetus behind the film is not, as the title suggests, a riff on the dangers of the West — though there are plenty of unfunny sight gags to bring it close — or even the slapstick interactions between what could have been a strong ensemble cast. Instead, Albert’s quest for selfconfidence drives the film, and he realizes he is too nice

a guy for Louise and falls into the waiting arms of Anna.

Spoiler? Not really. You should have seen that coming from a mile away.

That’s right, the supremely arrogant, smugly clever MacFarlane expects us to believe he has a confidence problem. And I say MacFarlane instead of Albert because there is virtually no difference between the two. Albert spends most of the movie going on extended monologues

‘A Million Ways to Die in the West’ Rated R

structured like standup bits. MacFarlane is trying to break into yet another branch of comedy with the same nihilistic, narcissistic energy as he did at the Oscars — except this time, there is not a whiff of self-awareness to be found. Where MacFarlane acknowledged his arrogance in his other projects, Albert repeatedly tries and fails to convince us he is the dejected underdog throughout this movie. Despite MacFarlane’s entirely unconvincing attempts at played modesty, he is treated as the wellmeaning everyman by every character he interacts with.

Perhaps it was some sort of ironic meta-joke that Albert is an a--hole in nice guy clothing, but I think to suggest this

would be overestimating the weak characterization that plagues the film.

The entire movie seems like a bloated vanity project, courtesy of MacFarlane, who allows barely any screen time for the rest of the talented cast. The worst injustice is that Sarah Silverman, who is hilarious as the religious prostitute Ruth, gets stale lines and repetitive gags while the vastly inferior Albert riffs in his sixth monologue. In short, the movie features impressive comedic talent in small doses from the supporting cast and mediocrity in large doses from MacFarlane. Theron, especially, carries the largely inconsistent script with much needed spunk, but most of her screen time consists of reminding Albert what a good guy he is.

Even though all of MacFarlane’s projects are characterized by his extreme political incorrectness, the bland script of this film is too lazy to even offend. Despite the occasional tasteless slave joke or Native American peyote fever dream, the movie comes off as surprisingly flavorless. Even when Harris takes a dump in a top hat, the writing and execution is hopelessly tired. The script is horribly erratic — leaping from a fart joke to a genuinely emotional moment between characters, and this rapid shift brings about tonal whiplash and overall confusion.

The movie is an obvious homage to the mother of all parody films, Mel Brooks’ seminal “Blazing Saddles.”

But the lazy writing, underwhelming leading man and reluctance to commit fully to tone makes this a poor tribute to one of the most influential comedy movies of all time.

By Charu Sinha

entertainment

tphsfalconer.com

the falconer

A17

Friday Night at the [Art] Museum

The Museum of Contemporary Art San Diego’s downtown location will host Sound Off, an event showcasing a collection of music, poetry and prose performances by local artists under the age of 25, on June 6 from 5-8 p.m. Sound Off is free for visitors under the age of 25, and general admission is $5. The evening will also feature a poetry workshop and screenings of short films made by young artists.

Christian Lopez, Educator for School and Youth Programs at MCASD, said that young adults often have difficulty relating to art, and he hopes that performances and artwork by those close to their age will help foster an interest in art and museums.

“The performances can be a poem, song, dance, commentary or even an improvisational piece,” Lopez said. “Whether you elect to perform an existing work or something new and entirely your own, Sound Off is the chance to add your voice to the museum experience.”

In keeping with the theme of young artists, the event was mostly planned by the Teen Advisory Group at MCASD. Group member

LIGHTS, CAMERA, MUSIC: Teens meet light and space artist Ela Boyd, pose for photos and dance to music by DJ Spooky.

Who: What: Where: When:

Joey Uy says that the event will offer a wider perspective on what young people are capable of regardless of age and experience. He was introduced to the teen group by his art history teacher at The Preuss School in December and has been taking inspiration from artwork he has seen around town.

“There’s a cliche that the younger generation is only inspired by Miley Cyrus, or social media or influenced by drugs,” Uy said. “We have so much potential and so much to give regardless of age — it’s just a number. It’s about the skill and the passion and how we can magnify that and translate it into a piece of art that our peers can connect to.”

In addition to planning Sound Off, Uy also created a fashion show inspired by cubism, which will be featured during the event.

Kurtis Shaffer (12), who will perform a saxophone solo at Sound Off, said that the event will showcase younger people with a “real devotion to their art.”

“I think that it’s important to give youth an artistic voice that is meaningful when the venues for that are pretty limited in San Diego,” Shaffer said.

by Anna Li

Emily Ann Laliotis, Rae Gun, Paper Days, Vinegar Tom and the rest of San Diego’s best young musicians, slam poets, dancers and performers Music, poetry, prose, film and dance in response to art in the galleries

— all

Museum of Contemporary Art San Diego, Downtown 1100 Kettner Blvd, San Diego, CA 92101

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A18 the falconer

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Summer’ss Coming Comin . . .

You Driving Yet?

A19

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SPORTS

Matt Livingston becomes the new Athletic Director, A21

Spring season draws to a close

A staff writer tries surfing for his first time, A23

GAME TIME

By Fernando Stepensky My year as sports editor has been one of the most rewarding, stressful, emotional, fun and captivating years of my young life, and I am overjoyed to announce that I am bringing my talents back to the sports section next year.

My confidence as sports editor was not high at the beginning of the year, but as the football season began I realized that I was in the position I had dreamed of since the 8th grade, and I was excited for it.

A lot of my favorite moments this year occurred while covering the football team for my second year. The three games I covered last year were Falcon losses, so interviews were not fun, and since I was a sophmore, I barely had any friends who played on the team. This year I got bearhugged after touchdowns, threw the ball around with players pregame, and was closer to the game than I have ever been.

Not surprisingly, my favorite story and moment of the year was related to football. In the March issue I wrote a story with Falconer PR Manager Katie Page on the retirement of Scott Ashby, a coach I had gotten to know very well. I went into that interview with the same mentality I went into all interviews with Coach Ashby: “Let’s hope this goes well.” What I never expected was the most emotional interview I have ever been a part of, one that would end with me telling Falconer adviser, Mia Boardman Smith, “This is why I am a journalist.” What followed was a beautiful finished product and a “Good job, bud” from Ashby.

While the Ashby story was not stressful, the life of a sports editor most certainly was, and I definitely had some moments of panic. Fortunately I always had headphones handy at prelayouts and layouts to literally “Ease My Mind,” and now remember that from the 10 p.m. stories all the way to last-minute edits, I loved what I was a part of.

I got to speak to the legendary Ed Burke. I saw faces of champions as well as faces of disapointment. I saw people saying heartfelt goodbyes, and I saw people saying their very first hellos, and throughout the entire process I had two constant thoughts: I cannot believe I get to do this every day, and I hope to do this forever.

I intend to make some exciting changes to the sports section that will, in turn, make the section more captivating and also more personal; I can’t wait to debut these ideas next year. I love being the sports editor for the TPHS Falconer day in and day out, and I will continue to make my section something the entire school can be proud of.

sports

tphsfalconer.com

Q& A

the falconer

A21

New TPHS Athletic Director

with Matt Livingston

Q: Why did you want to become athletic director?

A: Well, I’ve been at this school a long time. I graduated here in 1988, played two sports

here, really loved it, and then I’ve been coaching baseball and football on and off here since about 2000. Chas [Doerrer] is a good friend of mine. In fact we were on the same football team way back in the day, so when it came down that he was going to step aside, they were looking for somebody. I really respected Chas as well as Ann Meigs, [the athletic director] before him, who was here for so long and put Torrey Pines on the map athletically … the opportunity to become a part of that was really exciting.

Q: Does your prior experience with sports at TPHS help you in your new role?

A: It helps me in the fact that I played here as your average high school athlete.

I was a student, a teacher [and] a coach at the varsity, JV and freshman level for multiple sports … all those things, [like] when I’m talking to coaches and I might have trouble, I can remember that. Or when I’m talking to a student who is struggling, I’ve also juggled school and sports; I’ve done all of those things ... there is a sort of empathy that I think I can get on the same level ... because I remember all those times, good and bad, and now I [can] see it from a different set of eyes.

Q: How do you plan to increase the Falcon spirit?

A: I guess the big dream would be something like the [ESPN Excellence in Sports Performance Yearly] awards where all the great athletes gather to recognize individuals and teams. Having a sort of Falcon ESPY awards night would be amazing ... [we could] gather at the end of the season to celebrate each other’s accomplishments as a school.

Q: Is there anything you would like to say to Torrey Pines?

A: Just that I’ve spent the majority of my life here and the families are great. I really admire the students, what that they do and how they represent us wherever they go. The sports [are] unique in that way because we actually go to another community … and [other] schools see [that] this is what Carmel Valley has to offer.

PHOTOS BY GRACE BRUTON AND KENNETH LIN/FALCONER

A22 the falconer

f/stop

marc lefferdink varsity lacrosse may 24, 7:26:02 a.m.

camera: canon eos 40d lens: canon 70-300mm f/4-5.6 iso: 1600 exp: 1/320 seconds f/stop: f/5.0 by grace bruton

sports

june 5, 2014

sports

tphsfalconer.com

the falconer

A23

FALCON TRIES: SURFING

BY AUSTIN ZHANG

A Falconer staff writer decides to embrace, finally and fully, the California stereotype by trying to survive a cold day of surfing.

As a native Texan, I spent my early childhood far away from the ocean.

Even during my three years in China, the beach was a luxury I experienced only once or twice a year. But after living in seaside San Diego for about five years, I was not surprised when the staff asked me to surf for Falcon Tries.

I readily agreed, figuring I had nothing to lose, with the possible exception of life and limb.

My instructor was Austin Sonnier (11), a nationally ranked competitive surfer sponsored by Hobie surfboards and Matuse Wetsuits, who I met in front of Powerhouse Park. He greeted me in a friendly manner as he unloaded the surfboard from the harness on top of his car. Turning to me, he explained that the board we were using was longer than most and was, therefore, good for novices. This I duly noted, as I was certain that, at some point, the board would be used as an improvised stretcher to carry me off the beach and into an ambulance. Sonnier gave me a wetsuit, and I left to suit up.

The wetsuit was an old one that he last wore in middle school, and it took me three separate attempts just to put it on. As I struggled this way and that, I could not help but compare the suit to a straitjacket. After all, I probably needed to have my head examined for having agreed to this whole charade.

Sonnier told me the toughest part of surfing was donning the wetsuit, but somehow I was not so reassured.

After that ordeal, we walked down to the beach. Sonnier had me lie down flat on the sand and practice paddling with my hands. He also showed me how to pop up on the board while I was riding a wave. The process seemed simple enough on dry land, and my feeble confidence grew a bit, allowing me to more bravely attempt everything

Sonnier was showing me. Once I had gotten the hang of the basics, we entered the water.

It was a cloudy day with little sun, so the water was frigid. As I felt the icy bite of the water climb my spine, I was immensely thankful for the wetsuit.

The restrictiveness that had given me so much trouble earlier was now welcomed with great appreciation. We stood in the water for a while, waiting for a good wave, something that Sonnier told me is a big part of surfing.

When the first suitable wave came along, Sonnier turned my board toward the shore, gave me a forceful push, and I frantically paddled to build up momentum. The wave began carrying me toward shore, and as I

”

I was certain that the board would be used as an improvised stretcher to carry me off the beach and into an ambulance.

Austin Zhang (10) �������

sped along it occurred to me suddenly that I had no idea what to do. Then it hit me — I should stand. Hastily, I fumbled through the steps to get up, and I managed to stand for a short duration before being thrown off. When Sonnier caught up with me, he told me that I handled the first wave well, but I chalked up my tiny success to beginner’s luck.

On my second try I experienced a “nosedive,” where my board dipped into the water and flipped over vertically as it was carried along the wave. As I

foundered in the water, coughing, I was reacquainted with the taste of seawater and the feeling of it shooting up my nose. It was not a pleasant reunion.

At one point during the lesson I was about to go on a wave when Sonnier pointed out that there were other surfers riding the wave and that I would be interrupting their path by getting on it. He described this as “cutting off” or “snaking,” which is sometimes penalized in competition but merely frowned upon in casual surfing.

Our session lasted through several waves, but I only managed to stand on the board three times in total. More often than not I either volunarily abandoned the board or was violently thrown off, flailing awkwardly in the water.

As we headed back, Sonnier told me that I had accomplished a lot for my first surf session. I had gotten into the wetsuit, for one, I had learned the basics of paddling, and I was able to stand up for for a few seconds. Still, I was relieved when I finally planted my feet on the shore. Surfing was an exhilarating and exciting experience, but I still had much to learn, judging by the way Sonnier expertly twisted and turned, riding waves horizontally when I could only manage to go straight forward.

At the end of the session, Sonnier hauled the board back to his car, I left again to take off my wetsuit, struggling only slightly less than before.

Overall, I found surfing to be a fascinating activity. The basics were not necessarily easy, but they were simple enough for someone with my limited PHOTOS BY GRACE BRUTON/FALCONER sports knowledge to understand. For now, however, I think a scrawny, PADDLING OUT: Austin Zhang (10) surfs succesfully unathletic person such as myself would for the first time just before losing his balance (TOP). Zhang learns how to paddle out (ABOVE). be better off on terra firma.

OBITUARIES Alex McCracken @almcc_deactivated

Jennifer Grundman Winter is Coming

This page is entirely fictional. None of these people are actually dead.

By Alex Jen, Anna Lee, Tasia Mochernak, Katie Mulkowsky, Alice Qu, Maya Rao, Charu Sinha, Fernando Stepensky and Austin Zhang

Cory Lomberg Where’s your mom now

Cory Lomberg, known affectionately to many as “mom,” “EIC” and “that cat lady with the Mary Janes” tragically died June 4 at 5:05 pm at a CHRISTOPH concert. Medical semi-professionals are guessing the cause of death was a lethal combination of ‘ludes, Alex Turner and “White Women.”

“She was under a lot of pressure to be the James of the family, even though I clearly filled his and Dave’s roles already — she couldn’t handle it when I told her she was going to be Tom,” sister Alexa Lomberg (‘12) said. Close friend Kanye West remarked that she was “never a room without a roof, HUUHHH.” Cory was a friend, a leader and an intergalactic icon of creativity. Ezra Koenig once said, “I go to great pains to find the best yogurt and granola,” and the same can be said of Lomberg. As we mourn her death, we must remember her eternal words of motivation: “Yikes.”

Photographer, philosopher, lacrosse manager and indie electronica band extraordinaire Alexander McCracken tragically departed from the earth on June 4 when frayed wiring from his lightbox at the same CHRISTOPH concert that killed Lomberg caught fire and exploded. Alexander, or “Alex,” for short, was a great man and a star of both TPHS publications, clearly proven when people yelled “ALEX!” in the lab and were always referring to McCracken and not his Asian colleague of the same first name. McCracken was a well-established photographer and cultural guru, even if the National Scholastic Press Association refused to admit it by giving him only an “Excellent” on his portfolio. He will be dearly missed by the cashiers of every Roberto’s location.

Jennifer Grundman, baker-savant, perfect essay writer and self-professed grammar Nazi, passed away this week at a “Game of Thrones” convention gone horribly wrong.

After some “GOT” enthusiasts decided to stage a mock battle, Grundman was the first to join. She saddled her pony and charged into battle, using her canyon-riding skills to expertly maneuver around the fallen bodies.

Too naive to realize that the mock battle was, in fact, a real battle — Grundman never understood sarcasm — she offered brownies to the champion of the Lannister House, who stabbed her with a sword and sent her hurtling off a cliff.

She is survived by her three cats and epileptic dog, which has lived a remarkable number of years.

Tara Manoogian

Natalie Dunn

Prom queen Tara Manoogian was eliminated by an unidentified assassin as she stepped out of her limousine on prom night. While many may know her as prom queen, the Falconer has been investigating who Manoogian really is underneath that glamorous guise.

Manoogian has remained somewhat of an enigma this past year, prompting the Falconer to wonder where she goes and what she does. All we really know about her is that despite her frequent disappearances from class, she has demonstrated dedication to her side job as a photographer — her primary job being her royal duties, of course. Services will be conducted at 2:30 p.m. on June 6 in the dark room located in the pub. Who knows what else goes on in there besides funerals?

Natalie Dunn passed away in the publications room of TPHS on June 2. She was found surrounded by chicken bowls, and the cause of death was determined to be incredibly high levels of Chipotle food. Dunn will be remembered primarily by her ability to sway group opinions, especially on the subject of where to go eat. The Falconer staff has elected to commemorate her life and passing by having take-out delivered to the journalism room five to ten minutes after the commencement of sixth period, in honor of her habitual tardiness and constant possession of food. The far corner of the journalism lab has also been hallowed and consecrated to remember Dunn, working diligently and singing Vanessa Carlton.

Mahan Chitgari tragically passed on Monday following her sixtieth consecutive viewing of “The O.C.” Chitgari suffered from severe emotional distress and trauma following the Season Three finale, during which she collapsed, saying she “just can’t.” Her final words were reported to be “Marissa, no!” She was found on the floor of her bedroom clutching a plush doll of main character Ryan Atwood, surrounded by the remains of a shrine she had built to Seth Cohen. Chitgari is remembered fondly as a connoisseur of CW teen dramas as well as a purveyor of celebrity gossip. Editor-in-Chief of People magazine John Huey released a statement following her passing: “Mahan was one of our most dilligent citizen journalists.

She would call in multiple times a day with tips on the whereabouts of Mischa Barton. How did she even know?

Who knows that? May she rest in peace.”

Savannah Kelly

Joshua Send

University of Richmond’s on-campus “authentic” “Mexican” “food” vendor, Co-Tixan, advertises its Funky Fries as a meal “to die for.” In Savannah Kelly’s case, it truly was. Kelly took her last breath late Tuesday night after consuming a whopping four orders of the rumored-to-be-Canadian delicacy, in a bittersweet night for her sorority sisters Candy and Nikki, who told authorities that they were “bummed [Kelly] ain’t able to drive them ‘round no more, but uh’lease proud she with God.” Instead of flowers, the Kelly family requests donations be made to Lilly Pulitzer’s spring collection in Chuck Bass’ name.

Joshua Send perished after members of his fan club leaped upon him in a frenzied craze at the University of Cambridge. Following Send’s arrival at the college, several dozen girls began to follow him around campus, wearing Northface and spouting trivia about German food. Send was reportedly bemused but flattered by the cult following he gained upon arrival at Cambridge, remarking that they “probably just needed help with their computers.” Nearly 40 girls trampled Josh as he walked to his dorm wearing a pleather jacket. The incident was described by Cambridge police as “tragic, but a good way to go.”

The Queen is Dead, Long Live the Queen

Layla Mazdyasni Death by Hug

Layla Mazdyasni passed away yesterday afternoon after her heart exploded with an overload of excitement and raw emotion. Mazdyasni tragically collapsed after hugging every single living thing on the TPHS campus during her last day as a Falcon. Mazdyasni’s last words came while trying to hug a goldfish in the science corridor, when she uttered, “Hey friend, I love you!” The funeral will take place at the Empire Polo Club in Indio, Calif. on June 5 at 3:00 p.m. with a strict hipster dress code of smiles, “love you”s and enthusiastic hugs as entrance requirements.

Dunn with this Earth

Mexi-can’t

Mahan Chitgari

I can be anything you want me to be.

Fatal Attraction