Families Dorset November/December 2022 Print

Some of you love it and others find it overwhelming….we think you all know what we’re talking about! Yes, the festive season is just round the corner and it’s not too soon to start planning. Start by planning a festive outing or two!

things get increasingly busy, it’s important that you don’t burn out before Christmas even arrives. Take a look at our tips for lightening your load in the run up.

Meanwhile, life ticks on. You may be choosing your child’s

conflict in

playground,

future education, trying to work

while your children keep you awake at night

about the cost of buying gifts for your child to take to all the birthday parties they are attending. If you are preoccupied with any of these things, this issue offers something very relevant

Linda

Editor, Families Dorset

In this issue

now to include your business in

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O n t h e d a y o f o u r o p e n m o r n i n g s , w e w i l l b e o p e n i n g o u r d o o r s f r o m 9 : 3 0 a m t o a l l f a m i l i e s w h o w i s h t o c o m e a n d v i e w o u r b e a u t i f u l s c h o o l a n d n u r s e r i e s a n d t o g e t a f e e l f o r o u r c u l t u r e a n d e t h o s . T h e e v e n t i s o p e n t o a l l b u t i f y o u a r e p a r t i c u l a r l y i n t e r e s t e d i n a 2 0 2 3 R e c e p t i o n s p a c e , i t w o u l d b e a g r e a t o p p o r t u n i t y t o s e e w h a t w e c a n o f f e r y o u a n d y o u r f a m i l y P l e a s e s c a n t h e Q R c o d e t o b o o k y o u r s p a c e . H o w e v e r , i f y o u c a n n o t m a k e t h e s e d a t e s , w e a l s o o f f e r p r i v a t e t o u r s . S i m p l y e m a i l a d m i s s i o n s @ p a r k s c h o o l . c o . u k t o b o o k y o u r v i s i t w i t h o u r h e a d t e a c h e r . W e l o o k f o r w a r d t o s e e i n g y o u s o o n

Printed by Buxton Press Design Rebecca Carr

Choosing the right primary school

By Gabrielle Nash

If your child turns four this academic year, they’ll be starting Reception next September and now’s the time to make their primary school application. Exciting times!

Your child’s primary school and its community becomes a large part of your family’s life, so feeling happy about the choice is very important. Depending on where you live you might have just one, two or maybe three schools to apply to. Or there may be numerous schools if you live in a city. So how do you go about knowing which will be a good fit for you and your child?

The catchment area

School catchment area is a key admission criterion for schools. This is generally based on the furthest distance that a pupil was admitted to the school the previous year but boundaries can be extended or shrink, according to the variables of each intake year. For example, one year there may be a larger cohort of siblings or looked-after children taking priority or it may be a year with a high birth rate, so the map alone does not guarantee your top choice.

You can check each school’s catchment area through your local authority to establish whether you’re likely to fall within it. Think carefully before aiming for a school for which you’re not in the catchment area. You don’t want to waste one of your choices.

Consider your working week. If you’re commuting to work, how will you do that after school drop-off? Is there a train or bus nearby or space to park your car?

A good fit

Every school is organised and managed differently, so you’ll need to do some research to see what each school offers and what matters most to you. When you’re shortlisting schools, it’s important to visit to get a feel for each one. Go armed with lists of questions and an open mind.

Each school will have its own personality but so does your child. Are they loud or reserved? Smaller schools with just one-form entry might suit a quieter child. If your child has any special educational needs, you’ll want to know the school caters well for them.

Extras

What wrap-around care does the school offer? If it doesn’t suit your needs, are there sufficient alternative options? Find out which secondary schools pupils go on to and see how that impacts on your thought process. For example, if a high proportion of the pupils go to the best local secondary school, then that’s a plus.

Top tips

Ofsted inspectors give ratings in their report: outstanding, good, requires improvement or inadequate. The Ofsted report also gives feedback on how different groups of children fare and the school’s strengths and weaknesses. While an Ofsted report is important, do not base your decision solely upon it.

Reach out to school parents on social media to get a range of opinions. See how they align with yours.

Go through the application procedure on your local authority’s website so you’re fully aware of the process.

Faith schools are an attractive option in many areas but it’s likely you’ll need to complete an additional form outlining your family’s religious practices.

When you are allocated your child’s school place in the spring, you can consider appealing the decision if you’re unhappy with the outcome. There are no guarantees the position will change though.

If you have a summer-born child, you may be able to defer their school start. You’ll need to approach your local authority.

Top resources

Find and compare schools in England at www.gov.uk/schoolperformance-tables

Get to grips with your child’s move into full-time education, with the Good Schools Guide (www.goodschoolsguide.co.uk) and The School Run (www.theschoolrun.com)

Understand the school’s catchment area with the interactive tool at The School Guide (www.schoolguide.co.uk)

If you’re a parent of a child with additional needs, seek further specialist advice at My Family Needs (www.myfamilyneeds. co.uk)

Reach out to other parents for parent-focussed tips on how to choose a school. Local Facebook groups are useful but so are resources that host forums where you can contact other parents eg www.mumsnet.com and www.netmums.com

For when the day finally arrives, there are some super resources for starting primary school at BBC Bitesize (www.bbc.co.uk/ bitesize) and Family Lives (www.familylives.org.uk).

Educating for the future

By Louise Livingston

Children are often asked what they want to be when they grow up. From farmers to flight attendants, astronauts to doctors, the answers are always a mix of familiar careers. But astonishingly, over two thirds of children joining primary school this September will end up in jobs that don’t yet exist. Think back thirty years - there were no social media managers or Bitcoin traders!

Today’s workplace is rapidly changing. As Richard Riley, former Secretary of Education, said: ‘We are currently preparing students for jobs that don’t yet exist, using technologies that haven’t been invented to solve problems we don’t even know are problems yet.’

It’s a challenge and mainstream education will be required to adjust. Is an education system that focuses mainly on teaching children academic subjects outdated? Focusing on tests and exam results will not deliver for a future which will need creative, flexible problem-solvers who can collaborate.

The visionary educational pioneer, Maria Montessori, recognised this when she wrote,

‘Education must no longer be mostly imparting knowledge but must take a new path, seeking the release of human potentialities.’

In Montessori education, children are guided by a teacher trained in child observation and development. Classrooms provide open-ended, hands-on activities where children choose tasks appropriate to their stage of development.

With activities so targeted to each child’s individual needs and interests, children are engaged and motivated to concentrate, persevere and develop self-discipline. In addition, the activities are designed to encourage children to think flexibly and come up with creative solutions. In the early years, this may simply be how to unbuckle their shoes or share a snack. Later, it may be an exploration of the Jurassic period or a novel approach to solving quadratic equations.

Mixed-age classes with children aged up to three years apart is another key feature of Montessori education. Younger children learn from older role models and older children benefit from the experience too. In this mini community, children share resources, put things away ready for someone else after they have used them and help each other. This fosters social collaboration and builds emotional intelligence.

Louise Livingston has over thirty years’ experience in education and a background in educational neuroscience. She is Head of Training at the Maria Montessori Institute (www.mariamontessori.org), which offers Montessori teacher training, online short courses and the Maria Montessori School for ages 2 to 12 in London.

Age is just a number

In a Montessori environment, children with a three-year age span work alongside each other, choosing and taking part in activities as and when they are developmentally ready. This is in sharp contrast to mainstream approaches which typically require children to learn the same things at the same time, in the same year group.

Developmentally, there can be a marked difference in the abilities of the youngest and oldest children in a standard classroom and how readily they can pass set milestones and tests.

With Montessori, children develop capacities at their own pace, building on a firm foundation of what they can already do.

Mistakes are viewed positively as an opportunity to find a different way of doing something, whereas sometimes mainstream approaches can make children feel that ‘getting it right’ is all that matters. When mistakes are valued as part of the learning process, a child’s confidence grows, they are able to try new things and contribute their ideas, exemplifying the fact that everyone has a unique perspective to offer.

Outstanding opportunities at Park School

Park School is a co-educational, private day school, highly respected in the Bournemouth area for providing outstanding education for boys and girls up to the age of 11. Its popularity is rooted in the wide range of opportunities and experiences it offers. Core subjects are supplemented by lessons in technology, languages, the arts, personal, social and health education, reasoning and critical thinking.

Carefully differentiated teaching enables children to progress at different rates, challenging high-fliers and providing individual support where required. A full programme of sports and activities help children become well-rounded, self-reliant individuals who love to learn. It’s no accident that so many of the school’s pupils win places and scholarships at local senior schools.

Above all, the school is P.A.R.K. (Polite, Ambitious, Resilient and Kind). When they leave, children take with them these values, empowering them to approach the next stage in their education with confidence, determination and respect for others.

For more information, visit www.parkschool.co.uk

Resolving playground conflict

By Zuzu Jordan

Playground conflicts can shape a child’s experience at school. When we show children how to manage them, they are learning vital life lessons about getting on with other people.

Conflict vs bullying Conflicts in the playground can flare up and be forgotten from one day to the next.

As parents, we can’t swoop in and save our children from uncomfortable or even painful situations while they are at school. However, we can equip them with their own skills to use when teachers are not immediately available to intervene. Using well-chosen words can change the course of a conflict and help equip children to deal with future ones.

Of course, it’s important to understand where conflict ends and bullying begins: bullying involves a repeated, intentional act to hurt someone; it can take many forms. All schools must have an anti-bullying policy should bullying occur.

Take action

When conflict occurs, explain to your child that ‘hotting up’ a conflict makes a disagreement worse and ‘cooling down’ makes it better; we can help children realise they have the power to influence and resolve situations.

Start by listing which behaviours can hot up a conflict, such as shouting, name-calling, invading personal space, accusing, lying and being physical. Then list the behaviours that can cool down a conflict: admitting to what you did wrong, saying sorry, saying what you would like to happen, using a calm voice and avoiding words such as ‘always’ and ‘never’ which can immediately make someone feel defensive.

Active listening is a fundamental skill in resolving conflicts. Help your children practise by asking them to listen and repeat instructions back and paraphrase what you have said. Encourage them to ask questions so they learn how to develop healthy dialogues.

Older children may have more complex conflicts involving social media. These require a slightly different approach. Childline (www.childline.org.uk) and UNICEF (www.unicef.org.uk) offer solid support and advice for those who are experiencing issues online.

Dealing with conflict provides an opportunity for growth, emotionally, socially and intellectually. By continuing to observe and give children a safe space to talk about any conflicts they have, we are providing useful safeguards against potential bullying scenarios.

Zuzu Jordan is a Mastery for Maths specialist who has taught primary aged children for sixteen years and is interested in early years and home learning. For free homework and home learning resources, find the Instagram page edumate_uk.

‘All Through’ at Talbot Heath School

Being an ‘All Through’ school means dedicated staff really get to know every pupil, building strong, supportive, nurturing relationships and guiding girls through all aspects of their development over many years. It also means a broad curriculum which provides great consistency and progression across year groups and key stages.

Younger pupils benefit greatly from the support and role modelling of the older girls, whilst older pupils develop empathy and leadership skills whilst working alongside younger pupils. Additionally, girls receive an education in a familiar environment surrounded by familiar people, allowing them to develop a strong sense of security and approach their futures with confidence and conviction.

Pupils attending the Junior School will automatically be offered a place in the Senior School if they are a positive role model, have a positive attitude to learning and standardised and teacher evidence of progress in English, Maths and Science.

To reserve a place at the school’s

What are peer listeners?

Some schools have implemented programmes where selected children are trained to listen to and support their peers. This particularly helps those who find it easier to open up to someone their own age who they can relate to. Often called peer listeners or playground buddies, the trainees are available to help with tricky situations that may arise in the playground.

Part of the training involves knowing when to recognise problems that are ‘too big’ and require adult support; for example issues that arise at home.

Peer listeners are taught the importance of confidentiality and empathy. Training also includes how to ask open-ended questions which encourages others to talk and demonstrates the value of getting problems off one’s chest.

These skills are crucial in life. Often both parties benefit from the interaction as the listener develops leadership skills whilst their peer gets to offload their concerns.

Giving children a chance to become a peer listener takes children one step closer to becoming a responsible citizen.

Boys’ body dissatisfaction

By Dr Charlotte Markey

It’s known that girls can show an awareness of dieting by the time they start primary school. Meanwhile, many boys feel they should be bigger, more muscular, more ‘manly.’ While this is a sign of body dissatisfaction, it tends to fly under the radar or go unnoticed by adults because it’s disguised as ‘getting healthy.’

Body dissatisfaction is not a superficial concern as it impacts health behaviours, social interactions and mental health in general.

Research indicates that boys and girls are almost equally likely to experience body dissatisfaction. Where girls might focus on weight loss diets, boys are apt to over-exercise, cut sugar or carbs (or both) from their diets and become consumed with their health.

Most parents aren’t likely to be concerned if their son decides to skip dessert or spend time lifting weights. If this shift in habits also coincides with puberty, it can be difficult to tell if a boy is getting leaner, broad-shouldered or just taller.

In other words, the typical parent may not be able to tell if there is a problem brewing or just normal teen development taking place. Still, this change in habits should be a red flag to keep an eye out for body dissatisfaction or even the emergence of disordered eating.

How do you know when your son has a problem or is just genuinely becoming more responsible for his health?

Boys should be gaining weight through puberty, not losing weight. If you notice your son losing weight, an appointment with a family doctor is in order.

It’s also important that health consciousness doesn’t interfere with enjoyment of food. If your son is rigid in his eating habits and won’t have a treat at a birthday party or refuses to participate in social activities that involve food, it’s likely there’s a problem. Further, supplement use (eg protein powder) is often indicative of real body image concerns.

Body dissatisfaction and disordered eating can become chronic and dangerous, interfering with health and development.

Treatment is more effective when problems are caught early. When in doubt, it’s best to seek guidance from a professional with relevant expertise, such as a registered dietitian or therapist.

Charlotte Markey PhD is a professor of psychology and chair of the health sciences department at Rutgers University, USA. Her latest book, Being You: The Body Image Book for Boys, is published by Cambridge University Press.

A balanced diet

It’s a popular misconception that boys and men need significantly more protein than girls and women. Furthermore, many people (um, boys) believe that they are protein deficient and that extra protein will help them to build muscle.

Nearly everyone gets plenty of protein, however, and any additional protein consumed can’t be used by the body; it will simply pass through. Some research suggests that men often eat too much protein and not enough fruit and vegetables. A balanced diet is a better and safer source of nutrition, given that regulation of supplements is spotty to non-existent.

If your son asks you to buy protein foods or make more proteinrich meals, explain how it’s important to eat a variety of foods and that the diet and supplement industry profit from our insecurities. If his goal is growth, health or even muscle, a varied diet is more important than protein.

With knowledge of what constitutes a healthy diet and body, boys will be better able to make informed decisions and act on them accordingly.

Triggered by teasing?

It isn’t just a stereotype that boys are less communicative than girls; this is supported by data. Boys are less likely to discuss their concerns, or even the boring minutia of their days with their parents.

Pat yourself on the back if your son comes to talk with youyou’ve already done something right when he feels able to share his thoughts.

If your son reveals that he has been teased about his weight or appearance, your instinct can be to immediately say: ‘You’re handsome/perfect.’ Try to resist doing this as it can unintentionally invalidate his concerns. Further, he will know that, as his parents, you are biased in your appraisal of him.

Instead, try to ask questions and prompt a discussion. ‘Who said that?’ and ‘Why do you think they said that?’ and ‘Do you agree with them?’ are good questions to start with. You want to listen and also make it clear that you love and value him overall for who he IS not for how he looks.

Lightening the mental load this Christmas

By Chloe Lowe

Christmas is one of the busiest times of the year for parents. The pressure to create the perfect experience for everyone builds into a behemoth balancing on a plate of mince pies, threatening to crumble at any minute.

The upward comparison with Insta-perfect mums and crafting geniuses, let alone the constant narrative in the press, on television and on social media, means the mental load reaches an all-time high during the festive season and it’s well documented that mums bear the heaviest burden.

The sheer volume of things to think about and do can quickly lead to high-stress, low mood and burnout and not enjoying a minute of Christmas.

It’s very British to need to present the perfect picture. But when you realise that you can’t control everything, including the actions of your extended family or your delivery man, it can be truly liberating!

How to create your ‘perfectly imperfect’ Christmas

Here’s a few tips on how to manage the mental load this Christmas and feel good about it too.

Grab a pen and paper and write a list of the top three things that mean the most to you this Christmas.

Focus on those first. Doing a few things well will feel so much better than spreading yourself too thin and doing lots of things, just ‘ok’.

Ask for and accept help - it’s a sign of strength, not a weakness.

Slow down to speed up. Running on caffeine at one hundred miles per hour is detrimental to your mind and body. Slowing down and taking some deep breaths or even indulging in a Christmas movie, will help you reset, re-energise and get some headspace.

Ask yourself what your children really want and need this Christmas and focus on that rather than succumbing to the pressure to spoil them or compete with peers.

Reduce your time on social media. It’s amazing how many hours you’ll get back.

Avoid too many excesses. Don’t deprive yourself of a glass of fizz and a few mince pies but counter them with a family walk in the fresh air or a healthy breakfast or lunch.

And don’t forget to give yourself the gift of self-care so that you can enjoy Christmas too.

Chloe Lowe is founder of @parentlistapp (www.parentlist. app), the app for busy parents who want to find joy in parenting.

Sail with Santa Cruise

Join us on a Sail with Santa cruise for a 1 hour and 15 minute trip around Poole Harbour with Christmas music. Each adult can enjoy a glass of mulled wine and a mince pie, whilst each child receives a soft drink, a biscuit and of course a present from Santa!

Cruise days: 3rd, 4th, 10th, 11th, 17th, 18th, 19th, 20th, 21st, 22nd, 23rd & 24th Dec 2022

Boards 15 mins before Departs 11am, 1pm, 3pm From Poole Quay

BOOK ONLINE NOW AT: www.citycruisespoole.com CALL: +44 (0)20 77 400 400 EMAIL: poolesales@citycruises.com

All aboard for the Poole Christmas Festival

City Cruises in Poole is excited to celebrate the Poole Christmas Maritime Festival on the water with its Festive Lights boat trips.

Throughout this magical Christmas festival, which will run from 19 November to 2 January, City Cruises will run daily thirtyminute boat trips every evening on its magical lighted boats.

Worried about being cold? Fear not! There will be hot chocolate stations on hand so you can enjoy a delicious beverage to keep you warm while you are aboard.

As well as its boat trips, City Cruises will be holding Christmas Parties every Friday and Saturday night, as well as on Sunday 18 and Thursday 22 December and Santa will return on its popular Sail with Santa Cruises at the weekends.

During the Festival, families will be dazzled by the lights of Poole, lit up from The Dolphin Centre all the way down the high street and Old Town and along the quay. To compliment the lights there will be funfair rides and Christmas market stalls.

For more information, visit https://bit.ly/festivecitycruises

Christmas Spectacular at The Regent Centre

Since the first Christmas Spectacular in 2012, this festive show at The Regent Centre in Christchurch has become a tradition for families across Dorset. The fun, fast-paced, cracker of a show has left audiences smiling from ear to ear for over a decade and this year celebrates its tenth anniversary, with the perfect entertainment to get you in the Christmas spirit.

From 17 to 24 December, this year’s Spectacular is set in the North Pole at Santa’s Magic Toy Workshop. Follow Santa and his elves as they busily preparing for another festive season.

But sabotage is afoot and a nasty frost is spreading throughout Christmastown. Will the elves work out who is plotting to ruin Christmas? Or will the frightening frost freeze Christmas forever?

With a fabulous blend of up-beat dance routines, popular ballads and Christmas favourites, all performed by theatre professionals and adorable elves, this festive treat will make magical memories for the whole family this year.

More information and booking at www.theregent.co.uk or call 01202 499199.

Aladdin at The Tivoli Theatre

Following the huge success of last year’s spellbinding pantomime Sleeping Beauty, Made to Measure Productions are delighted to be back at The Tivoli Theatre in Wimborne this Christmas with an exciting new production of Aladdin.

The show will feature incredible special effects from internationally acclaimed illusionists The Twins-FX, which will give the panto the biggest WOW factor in Dorset! Prepare to be amazed as Aladdin soars over the audience on his amazing flying carpet, with no strings attached!

The panto will star Britain’s Got Talent star, Courtney Jackson, as the hilarious Widow Twankey, with a wardrobe of outrageous costumes that must be seen to be believed. It will also star Wimborne favourite, Tegen Jones, weaving magic as Scheherazade and seasoned pantomime performer, Lee Redwood, who will have the audience in stitches as the hilarious Wishee Washee!

So hop on your magic carpet and join The Tivoli this Christmas for the best value, most spectacular pantomime in Dorset.

More information and booking at www.tivoliwimborne.co.uk

A Christmas adventure at Upton Country Park

Early one morning when the winter solstice was done, Upton Country Park woke to find the woodland animals...gone. Where could they have gone, with no sign of whisker or tail?

Come and find out on the Christmas Woodland Trail!

Enjoy the perfect family adventure this Christmas holidays at Upton Country Park! From 17 to 24 December and again from 27 December to 1 January, Upton Country Park’s immersive Christmas woodland trail will take your family winter wandering amongst the trees along an accessible route.

Discover festive scenes and listen for musical moments in the woods. Children can search for winter woodland animals and earn a Christmas present, ready for them to collect from under the Upton Country Park Christmas tree.

For more information, visit www.uptoncountrypark.com/ events

Dorset

Five party ideas kids will love

By Jude Fellowes

Stuck for ideas for the perfect party theme for your child’s party? Here are some of the parties our children have recently enjoyed.

Chocolate parties

What could appeal more to children of almost any age than learning about, tasting and then making lots of chocolate goodies to take home? You can either host at home or hire a venue. Beware though, children plus chocolate can lead to hyperactivity and over excitement so chocolate eating does need to be closely supervised!

Interactive parties

Our daughter recently went to a friend’s party where the entertainer took the children on an imaginary journey, accompanied by story-telling and music, with some games thrown in for good measure. As a child who loves stories and role play, this was pretty much a perfect party for her.

Art and craft parties

If you can come up with ideas for arty activities, this kind of party keeps most children focused and concentrating. Our son went to a craft party with a superhero theme. He made a very respectable shield and decorated a cape for the superhero character he invented. I think he might also have enjoyed the activity after the art and craft too which involved running around wearing the cape and carrying the shield, pretending to be the superhero….

Lego party

Most kids enjoy Lego. You can host your own if you have a reasonable amount of Lego. Set a building challenge and tie it in with a theme such as animals, pirates, space or princesses. Our son wants a Lego party for his next birthday party – partly because he’s already figured out that it’s a good way to get us to buy lots more Lego….

Movie theme party

Whether it’s Frozen, Harry Potter or Star Wars, there are loads of popular children’s films which are perfect for a movie themed party. I remember taking our daughter to party after party where all the girls were dressed as Ana or Elsa and were belting out Let it Go, to the “joy” (aka agony) of the assembled parents. Hire an entertainer (or become the character yourself!) or create a challenge or an adventure based on the film. For example, children could be set the task of making a magic potion for Harry Potter or get their faces painted like their favourite character.

An unforgettable party service from Teeparty

Whether your child is looking for a gaming or pizza-making party, magical sleepover or something more bespoke - the team at Teeparty will take the stress away.

Teeparty provides a full party planning service, from styling right through to entertainment and catering. The team works with you to help with ideas and deliver unforgettable experiences that ooze imagination and celebrate fun. These include:

Luxe Picnic

Turn your home into the perfect spot to entertain with a custom pop-up luxe picnic. The setups are completely versatile so can work with any theme and colours, are styled by a professional event stylist and come complete with tableware to match your theme.

Indoor Themed Teepee Sleepovers

Providing all the hire equipment you could possibly need to transform your indoor space into a magical sleepover world.

For more information, call Teeparty Event Planners on 07773 201586 or visit www.tee-party.co.uk

Great value new climbing parties at RockReef

RockReef on Bournemouth Pier has re-introduced off-peak rates on birthday parties, providing even greater value, as well as a new birthday party option for Activity Only, for those looking for a lower cost option without food.

RockReef birthday parties are like no other. With twenty eight climbing challenges, a HighLine aerial obstacle course, Pier Cave and adrenaline activities, there are activities to suit everyone ages 4+. RockReef parties include ninety minutes activity time and those that include the food option have a designated table in the café after the activities, with a choice of party food options.

In addition, there’s a free slide for the birthday child and a voucher to return as a gift from RockReef.

Off-peak party rates run Monday to Friday during term time. Peak is weekends and holidays. Prices start from just £10.50pp for a party of eight people or more.

For more information, visit www.rockreef.co.uk/birthdayparties and call 01202 983983 to check availability and book a party to remember.

Party time at Golden Gecko!

Golden Gecko is an exciting indoor climbing centre in Romsey and the ideal place to host your child’s birthday party. Everyone will enjoy plenty of climbing and food can be provided.

With 190m2 of climbing available on the Climbing Tower and Challenge Wall, children will never be bored at Golden Gecko.

What’s more, any child age 5+ can join in, with or without climbing experience. For those that do have experience, bouldering is also available.

With more than seventy routes and easy access to roped climbing, safety is taken care of with seventeen easy auto belay devices which lower the climber to the ground at a controlled rate and act as a safety check if they fall. Golden Gecko also offers a range of instructed sessions for both kids and adults.

If you’re coming to watch your family climb or need fuel between climbs, The Golden Gecko café provides a range of delicious food, snacks and great coffee for you to enjoy.

For more info visit, www.ggclimbing.com

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Sporty parties at Purbeck Sports Centre

Purbeck Sports Centre in Wareham offers sporty parties for children of all ages.

Take the hassle out of planning your child’s birthday party and let Purbeck Sports Centre do it for you.

Purbeck offers a range of parties for active children, including 5-a-side football (ages 5+), swimming (ages 1+), swimming with an inflatable (ages 5+), Nerf (ages 9+), archery (ages 10+) or Laser Tag (ages 7+).

Your child and their friends will take part in your choice of activities and be supervised by the Centres’s qualified instructors. Perfect for children who like to be on the move! The friendly team at Purbeck Sports Centre will ensure your child has a birthday party to truly remember.

To satisfy hungry tummies after the party, the on-site café has a great selection of food and drink to choose from and you can book food in advance.

More information and booking at www.dorsetcouncil.gov.uk/ purbecksportscentre

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E V E N T P L A N N E R S P A R T Y M E N U

Birthday presents on a budget

By Tamsin Ryan

Party invitations are a thrill for children, less so for presentbuying parents! However, fun does not have to be expensive. Here are some great gift ideas that will delight the recipients without breaking the bank.

The present box

Buying gifts throughout the year (during the sales or ad-hoc promotions) and setting them aside saves money and avoids the last-minute panic shopping dash. Great gifts to keep an eye out for are the mini Orchard Toys games (www.orchardtoys. com), which are usually not gender specific, cater for a broad age range and retail at £5.35. Look out for craft or gardening kits, books and outdoor games such as skipping ropes, hula hoops, goalie gloves or frisbees, which have lasting play value.

Multi-packs

Multi-packs can be divided up to create gift sets, which can be very cost effective. Mix and match the items to suit the age and interests of the birthday child. For younger kids, a bundle of ten books (The Works usually sell ten books for £10), a party pack of bubbles or a bumper pack of assorted playdough make a great gift.

Savvy shopping

High street discount shops all stock very well priced toys, craft items and books. There are also some good resources online such as www.poundtoy.com and The Entertainer (www.thetoyshop.com).

Favourite ‘go to’ gifts

Presents that get children outdoors or being creative are always a win; something like a magnifying glass and a bug identification

‘Non toy’ gifts

Children are often inundated with toys on their birthdays, so a fun t-shirt or some funky socks can work well, especially if you can find something featuring their favourite superhero or TV character. These can be very reasonably priced in high street chains and most supermarkets and parents will be pleased you’ve bought their child something to wear.

Club together Club together with other parents in the class and buy one larger toy, voucher or experience. The birthday child will get a much bigger present and it will have cost you each less.

Creative gift-wrapping can zing up the contents and it doesn’t have to cost a thing. Use pages from an old magazine or street map, leftover wallpaper or personalise a brown paper bag with lots of colour.

For more birthday party tips, read Tamsin’s blog at www.icecreamandjelly.com or Insta @icecreamandjelly_uk.

Eco ideas

Handmade: With a little time and creativity, handmade presents are a very cheap option; hair scrunchies, superhero masks, embellished t-shirts, crochet toys, personalised totes or hand knitted beanies.

Scrap schemes: These are a great source of free and cheap craft materials, such as paper, fabric, elastic, ribbons, beads and sequins. Not only do these make crafting even cheaper, they also help the planet by using up materials that would otherwise have gone to landfill, so it’s win-win! Try www.reusefuluk.org.

Pre-loved: Gifting pre-loved is becoming more acceptable. So many toys are untouched and unloved and whether it’s something your own children don’t want or a toy purchased from a charity shop, children really don’t mind! It’s also worth noting that many pre-loved marketplaces and charity shops also sell brand new toys that are looking for a new home; some real bargains can be found that anyone would be very happy to re-gift.

Grow your own: Gift wrap a plant pot with a little bag of compost and some seeds for a gift that will keep growing!

Fiver parties

Whilst these might feel a little lacking in imagination, ‘fiver parties’ are increasing in popularity and it’s easy to see why.

Popping a £5 note in an envelope removes the need to worry about your budget and hunt down a suitable gift. And let’s face it, how often does the birthday child play with every single gift they receive from a classful of guests?

‘Fiver parties’ give parents the chance to buy something larger that they know the birthday child really wants and saves the risk of duplicate or unwanted gifts.

Freed from the mountain of presents, which can seem a bit much sometimes, fiver parties place the focus on the more inclusive experience of sharing time, games and tea with friends.

Another plus point is that fiver parties can introduce a child to money management. Once the birthday child has experienced the excitement of a fistful of cash, there’s a lesson in choosing whether to save or spend, then working out what they can afford to buy.

book (which come in under £10), ‘scavenger hunt’ type cards, a kite, pavement chalks or a gardening or craft kit.

Sleepless in ….wherever…

By Shyamantha Asokan

How do you juggle work and home when your kids won’t sleep?

It’s 4.30am and I’m sleeping across the bottom end of my bed. I’m all crunched up so my feet don’t dangle off the edge, with no pillow and my duvet at a weird angle. I doubt this even counts as sleep – but I’ll take whatever I can get.

So how did I get here?

My three-year-old daughter and my fifteen-month-old son are just emerging from a month of back-to-back nursery illnesses, which has thrown their sleep right off course. Although, even in normal circumstances, neither of them is great at sleeping when they should or where they should. They certainly don’t sleep like the children in all the parenting books I’ve read (seriously, who are those children?).

Here’s a typical night in our house at the moment…

• 8pm: Both kids go to sleep in their bedrooms.

• 11pm: My son wakes and will only go back to sleep in our bed. Husband goes to sofa.

• 1am: My daughter wakes and goes to sleep on the sofa with my husband.

• 2am onwards: My son wakes one or two more times and I cuddle him back to sleep with varying degrees of success. Sometimes it takes an hour.

• 6am: The kids are up for the day.

Sometimes my son falls asleep on my lap and I have to shuffle him onto our mattress at a diagonal angle, in order not to wake him, leaving me just the bottom strip of the bed to sleep on.

Sometimes he falls asleep on my arm and I have to ‘ninja slide’ it out from under him when he’s in a deep-sleep phase. The whole thing is absurd.

Writing emails in my mind

Of course, I still need to go to work – and working while sleepdeprived is brutal.

Madonna and Margaret Thatcher, two under-slept women who were big in the 1980s, both seemed to equate a lack of rest with a passion for their job. This is questionable for a million reasons. Tracy Emin, big in the 1990s, perhaps more sensibly described her insomnia as ‘crippling.’

In any case, I just turn out to be a rubbish version of my usual self. My eyes burn as I read research reports, concentrating is hard and pretending not to be tired is tiring.

In meetings, part of me is listening to what everyone is saying but part of me is just thinking about how well-slept they all look. If you’ve had a meeting with me recently and you thought I was a bit distracted, it’s because I was thinking about how great the skin under your eyes looks.

Overnight, when I’m woken by the kids, I struggle to go back to sleep as work-thoughts pop up and race around my head. I lie at the bottom of the bed and write emails in my mind. Meanwhile my son snuffles and snores like a contented little sea-lion, in his rightful place at the centre of the only double bed in the house.

I was, of course, working when I was on maternity leave last year – looking after children and running a house is a job. But I was surrounded by other women with young children, in a blearyeyed ecosystem where everyone was tired. The professional

‘back-to-work’

world feels very different. Arianna Huffington has said that sleep is a feminist issue, as women get far less of it than men.

But, in the midst of it all, there are suddenly moments of pure rest.

There are endless parenting books that tell you not to cosleep with your children but in my family’s case it’s a balm for everyone involved. At the weekend I have afternoon naps with my daughter and her truly innocent sleep, the kind that only a child can have, calms me until I drop off too.

Shyamantha Asokan is a Midlands-based journalist and mother of two. This blog is part of a series called The Chaos Train, a record of daily life when you have a career and preschool children.

With thanks to www.workingmums.co.uk who host her blog online. Find part time, home based and flexible full-time jobs plus advice for working mums on its site.

Car seat safety: what is the law?

You must wear a seat belt where one is fitted.

The driver may be prosecuted if a child aged under 14 years doesn’t wear an appropriate seatbelt which, for children aged under 12 years and shorter than 135 centimetres in height, means the correct child restraint.

A child may wear an adult seatbelt when they reach 135 centimetres in height or the age of 12 years old (whichever is reached first).

Find out more at https://bit.ly/seatbeltbooklet

7 top tips before you buy** Avoid second hand car seats -. you can’t be sure of their history. Research and prioritise safety. All seats must pass minimum standards of safety. Some manufacturers test way beyond these standards.

Get independent advice from Child Seat Safety (www. childseatsafety.co.uk) or from BCP Council Road Safety Team at road.safety@bcpcouncil.gov.uk who have IOSH accreditation or can direct you to someone experienced. Ask for the car seat expert in store to serve you and ask about their qualifications. If they are IOSH approved in Child Seat Safety Awareness they should be able to provide an accreditation number. If they aren’t available, request an appointment. Where possible, make sure your IOSH expert shows you how to fit the car seat. This avoids confusion and should give you confidence to fit the seat correctly.

If you’ve already bought your car seat, visit one of our car seat fitting clinics in Poole, Bournemouth and Christchurch, to get your car seat checked.

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