Families Thames Valley East Nov/Dec 2020

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Thames Valley East

IN THIS ISSUE

Shop local this Christmas How to make Christmas special and more...

Issue 111 November/December 2020 familiesonline.co.uk

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Families Thames Valley East 1

Preparatory School

Here for you and your son’s future

Est. 1888

We offer private tours of our school

Book now: sjb.admissions@sjb.email

01784 494 053

www.sjbwindsor.uk

Inspiring minds, creating B R bright I G H T futures Claires COURT Court CLAIRES Anindependent independent school school An in Maidenhead Maidenhead in forNursery Nursery to to Sixth Sixth Form for For m

Join ourvirtual virtual open Join our openevents events to discover our academic, sporting to discover our academic, and creative opportunities, meet our sporting and creativeand head teachers, ask questions, hear all about life at meet Claires our Court. opportunities,

head Girls teachers, ask Senior 4 November questions, hear all Senior Boysand 5 November about Claires Court.

Nursery life and at Juniors 6 November Sixth Form 10 November

Senior Girls 4 November Seniors 3 December Senior Boys 5 November Reception Boys 15 January Nursery and Juniors November Reception Girls 226January Sixth Form 10 November All Sites 29 January

Book visit today today Book your your visit 01628 327723 327723 01628 www.clairescourt.com/events www.clairescourt.com registrar@clairescourt.com registrar@clairescourt.com

2 Maidenhead I Windsor I Marlow I Ascot I Slough I Egham

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In This Issue 3-5

News & information EDUCATION

7

Improving your child’s working memory PARENTING

10

Getting the best out of online kid’s classes

11

Recognising a subtle type of bullying

12

The importance of toddler play CHRISTMAS

14-15 Shop local 16-19 How to make Christmas special 21

How many toys does a child need?

22

Christmas if you’re separated

23

BOOK CLUB

....endless ideas for families of young children in Maidenhead I Windsor I Marlow I Ascot I Slough I Egham

Welcome The days are shortening rapidly now and although life is still challenging, Christmas is on the horizon. Whilst celebrations might feel a bit different this year, there is still plenty to look forward to.

Supporting small businesses is becoming increasingly important and this issue we’ve included some great gift suggestions in our shop local article on pages 1415. It’s also worth checking out our top picks for places to visit and other ideas to ensure this Christmas is still a special one on pages 16-19.

For those of you still taking part in classes online, there are some tips on page 10 for how to get the best out of them, as well as some great articles in our education section on how to improve memory and writing creatively. Our book club is also back this issue with two copies of Benji Davies’ new book The Snowflake up for grabs - a perfect Christmas read for young children.

Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas and a more favourable 2021!

Anna and Rach x facebook.com/familiestve twitter.com/familiestve

Editors Anna Collins I Rachel Bailey

01628 788058 Editor@FamiliesTVEast.co.uk www.Familiesonline.co.uk Circulation: 19,000 Next Issue: Jan/Feb 2021 Cover image: depositphotos.com Families Thames Valley East is part of Families Print Ltd, a franchise company. All franchised magazines in the group are independently owned and operated under licence.

Families is a registered trademark of LCMB Ltd. Remenham House, Regatta Place, Marlow Road, Bourne End, Bucks, SL8 5TD. The contents of Families Thames Valley East are fully protected by copyright and none of the editorial or photographic matter may be reproduced in any form without prior consent of Families Thames Valley East. Every care is taken in the preparation of this magazine but the franchise company, Families Print Ltd and Lifecycle Marketing cannot be held responsible for the claims of advertisers, nor for the accuracy of the contents, or any consequence thereof.

MUSIC CLASSES FOR THE 2s TO 8s Tuesday afternoons & Saturday mornings

Jurgens Centre 91 Harvest Road, Englefield Green, Surrey For further information, contact Nikhil Dally 01932 363624 nikhil@dally.org.uk www.dally.org.uk/steppingnotes

ASCOT 01344 206466 ascot@stagecoach.co.uk

Helping children believe they can do anything Singing, dancing and acting classes for 4 - 18 year-olds

HENLEY AND MARLOW HIGH WYCOMBE 07968 598227 07968 598227 henleyandmarlow@stagecoach.co.uk highwycombe@stagecoach.co.uk MAIDENHEAD 01628 281128 maidenhead@stagecoach.co.uk

WINDSOR 01932 988086 windsor@stagecoach.co.uk Stagecoach Performing Arts is the trading name of Stagecoach Theatre Arts Limited. Stagecoach Theatre Arts schools are operated under franchise and are independently owned by their Principals. Stagecoach and Creative Courage For Life are registered trademarks of Stagecoach Theatre Arts Limited.

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Families Thames Valley East 3

News

Langley parents can enjoy a night out thanks to kids coding club Thanks to a new kids coding club at Langley College, busy parents can enjoy some well-deserved time off. Code Ninjas teaches kids aged 5-14 and, on top of their standard Junior and Create coding curriculums, the club offers a Parents’ Night Out programme.

“This service is really popular with parents, especially for families that have been self-isolating over the summer and want to enjoy a socially distanced date night whilst we care for their kids for the evening,” said Raman Bath, co-owners at Code Ninjas.

“Between the hours of 7pm and 10pm, we’ll work on coding activities with them and sort out their dinner too. What kid doesn’t want to learn how to build robots whilst eating pizza?”

Local Nurseries Celebrate Recycle Week Recycle Week, which ran in September gave The Old Station Nursery in Iver and Uxbridge the perfect opportunity to show their children the benefits of recycling and the impact they can have on preserving our planet. The children at both nurseries participated in a number of ‘recycling’ activities such as creating structures using cardboard; using ‘junk’ to make pieces of art; and using recycled paper for sensory play.

Yamuna Jayasinghe, Nursery Manager at The Old Station Nursery Iver, commented, “We always try to promote recycling in nursery, especially by involving the children in making their own items to play with using recyclable materials. This gives the children a sense of achievement and promotes creativity which enables cognitive development.”

Rochelle Anderson, Nursery Manager at The Old Station Nursery Uxbridge, added, “Helping children understand the importance of recycling from a young age will give them the tools and knowledge to make a difference to the world in which we live in, now and in the future.”

The new coding school can also host your child’s birthday party – complete with a cake, balloons and even party favours! Visit www.codeninjas.co.uk/langley-brk-uk for more information.

60th Anniversary for Claires Court School and a little history lesson!

This academic year sees the 60th Anniversary of Claires Court School, having opened its doors for the first time on 21 September 1960. Here at Families we love this picture of a class of 1960! The founders, David and Josephine first met in the late 1940s when they were History undergraduates at King’s College. After marrying, and pursuing careers in teaching, they began researching where to start a new school. They learnt that there was a site in Maidenhead which had previously been a convent school. This became Claires Court and was deemed particularly suitable as it had a large playground and tennis court!

The new school quickly established itself, offering both day and boarding places to boys aged from 6½ to 13 years. In 1964 the Ridgeway site took on boarding pupils bringing the total of students to 160. Boarding lasted till the early 1970s, then room was made here for the youngest years at this site. In 1993 the acquisition of Maidenhead College and corresponding all girls school created more space. In 2017 the school passed 1,100 attendees.

Hugh Wilding, the Administrative Principal today, said: “Claires Court is committed to providing the best education and facilities for the benefit of people in local and surrounding areas, which we currently do across our three Maidenhead sites”. www.clairescourt.com

For more information email premieriver@theoldstationnursery.co.uk or premieruxbridge@theoldstationnursery. co.uk

Advertise your business in our next issue Call 01628 788058 4 Maidenhead I Windsor I Marlow I Ascot I Slough I Egham

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News

Pat Steel announces new venues After months of online classes, local dance school Pat Steel School of Dance, made a welcome return to face to face teaching in September, homed in not one, but two, new venues! The dance school who offer classes in both Maidenhead and Beaconsfield, are delighted to announce that those classes previously being held at the Magnet, have moved across to the beautiful new studios in the Braywick Leisure Centre where Miss Candy and Miss Naomi are busy teaching ballet and modern from beginners to Grade 8.

Meanwhile, Beaconsfield classes have moved into the light, airy space at Holtspur Scout Hut, which has been a great success for both their junior ballet and tap pupils.

Also starting this term, is a brand new First Steps in Ballet class which will be based in Holtspur on Wednesdays. So, if you have a 3 or 4 year old who loves to dance, please get in touch for a 4 week trial session starting in November.

All steps have been taken to ensure classes are conducted in a Covid secure environment. For more information or to book, call 01494 673919 or email admin@patsteelschoolofdance.co.uk

Letter from Santa

Top Self-Care Tips for Working Parents The Covid-19 pandemic has been a huge test of parents’ resilience and adaptability. So how can you last the distance?

Pace yourself - take a break from screens and get regular exercise Ask for help when needed Use different communications channels to stay connected and break isolation Create routines which can be flexed around changing circumstances

All children love to receive a letter addressed to them in the post, but what could be more special than a letter from Father Christmas? Here are two ways of making this happen.

Make the case for why greater flexibility is a win-win for both you and your employer

Royal Mail Letter to Santa For children to receive a FREE letter from Santa via the Royal Mail children must post their letter to Santa by 11 December.

Envelopes must have either a first or second class stamp and be addressed to Santa/Father Christmas, Santa’s Grotto, Reindeerland, XM4 5HQ. The letter must include your child’s full name and address. www.royalmail.com/christmas/letters-to-santa

Find a space to share your stress with people who are empathetic; Focus on the next hours or days rather than being overwhelmed by the bigger picture Check in on others and celebrate getting through each week Mental well-being is crucial for the long haul - and because your mental health affects that of your children. For more detailed advice, visit www.workingmums.co.uk

NSPCC Santa Letter Children can also receive a personalised reply from Santa via his elves at the NSPCC in exchange for a minimum £5 donation to the charity. The letter is ordered online and must be placed by 9 December.

Phoenix families 2.pdf 2 01/10/2020 11:17 http://letterfromsanta.nspcc.org.uk/letter-from-santa

We put energy to good use

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Families Thames Valley East 5

Education News

BE a Step Ahead BE Confident BE Yourself

Herries Co-Ed Preparatory School & Nursery from 2 - 11 years

Promoting

Sportsmanship

From cheering on the sidelines to leading the pack, children at Herries learn good sportsmanship at Bisham Abbey’s world class National Sports Centre.

• • • • • •

Slough’s only Independent School for boys and girls age 2-16 years 100% pupils achieved Grade 5 GCSE in Maths and English (2020) Read Write Inc. Model School 14% above national average results at the end of Reception 11+ Curriculum taught from Year 1 Robust Intervention Strategy creates Individualised Learning

With the right education, every child can BE a success.

#BELONGCLOSE

www.longcloseschool.co.uk

Skills which last a lifetime.

To take a tour of Herries visit www.herries.org.uk/admissions/make-an-enquiry 11+ Centre • Music Suite • Weekly Outdoor Activities at Longridge • Wraparound care from 7.30am - 6.00pm 01628 483350 | admissions@herries.org.uk | www.herries.org.uk

Is your daughter starting school in September 2021?

Come and discover first class learning at Highfield Prep

Book a private virtual tour where you can meet and have your questions answered by the Headteacher, Joanna Leach, as well as see our school in action.

Call 01628 624918 or email office@highfieldprep.org www.highfieldprep.org For girls from 3-11 years.

Located at the top of Castle Hill, Maidenhead

6 Maidenhead I Windsor I Marlow I Ascot I Slough I Egham

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Education

Improving your Child’s Working Memory Working memory is the part of the brain that stores information so it can use it again. Children use this all the time: to remember what they read in the previous paragraph of a book, when doing mental maths and to follow directions with lots of steps. The good news is that, if your child’s working memory seems poor, it can be improved with practice. Here are some ideas that might help:

Encourage questions To learn and remember, a child needs to fully understand a topic.

By asking questions, children actively participate in learning, helping them develop a deeper understanding of the subject.

Let your child be the teacher Only when you fully understand something can you truly explain it. To check your child’s understanding, get them to tell you what they know. ‘Teaching you’ knowledge they just learned is more likely to make it stick.

Discuss a topic and ask your child’s opinion Learning is much more fun if you can discuss topics and exchange opinions. If your child is expecting a discussion, they are more likely to retain the information for at least the amount of time required to answer questions about it. Once an engaging discussion has happened, they are more likely to remember the subject matter.

Visualisation and flashcards Get your child to picture something in their mind and then describe it. Initially they may need to draw the picture first, but,

with practice, they may no longer need to do this. Flashcards with words or pictures can also be used to practice spellings or the meanings of words.

Use the senses Your child will develop a better relationship with what they are learning if they engage with it in lots of ways. Get your child to talk, act out using props, read and listen to audio or podcasts.

Encourage active reading Active reading involves underlining or highlighting text or making notes on stickers. This helps your child keep the information in mind. Pair with asking questions or discussing a topic as described above!

Break information down Smaller amounts of information are easier to remember. Build up from there. Encourage your child to organise the information into lists with headings and use different colours to make certain parts stand out.

Fun Ways to Improve Working Memory Games and cards

There are lots of matching games like Memory that can help.

Playing card games that require players to remember what cards have already been played are also helpful. Games like ‘I went to the shops and I bought….’ (just google it!) where players have to remember a long list of items also work out the memory muscle.

Langley, Berkshire At Code Ninjas Langley, kids learn to code while building their own video games. They gain problem solving, critical thinking, and STEM skills in a fun, safe, and inspiring environment.

LEARN TO CODE

Rhymes and songs

Funny rhymes and tunes help children recall facts and figures because our brains like remembering music and patterns. That’s why television shows like Horrible Histories have transformed children’s recollection of historical facts!

WORK WITH ROBOTICS

Check out facts and take trips

Look up interesting facts online or borrow books and audio visual material from the library. Visit places that help your child understand a topic better eg an historic building or a museum. This will associate a particular topic with an interesting event in your child’s mind making it much easier to remember the learning.

Use Mnemonics

These are great for remembering how to spell tricky words or remember things like the colours of the rainbow – you simply take the first letter of each of the words your child wants to spell and use them to make a fun phrase. For example, BECAUSE: Big elephants can always understand small elephants!

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LEARN & BUILD CIRCUITS Get in touch with the team at www.codeninjas.com/langley-brk-uk Or call 01753 316 089

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Follow us: @codeninjaslangley

Families Thames Valley East 7

Education

Why Children Should Write Creatively Every day children experience events that are new to them as well as building their vocabulary as they learn new words. These new experiences help them to develop a curious mind and could be the beginning of ideas which could be developed into stories or creative writing. This, in turn, has enormous benefits.

Creative writing contributes to the development of emotional skills. When creating a story, a child can channel their emotions and work out how to manage

particular situations. They may be able to show empathy with a particular character, experiment with expressing the different feelings of other characters and work through managing the difficult situations experienced by the characters. In so doing, children are learning how to better express their own feelings, as well as understanding more clearly how others feel. Words and story-telling go hand in hand with self-discovery and selfexpression.

In a world where text speak and emojis are so common, creative writing helps develop writing skills that are less and less used by children generally.

Sentence structure, vocabulary and use of punctuation are all enhanced. We all know how essential effective communication is in the adult world and the basis for it is learned during childhood. Writing collaboratively with others also allows children to share ideas and learn to work as a team, developing their storyline together.

When a child begins to write down their ideas, and develop them into stories and creative writing they hone some disciplines which become important lifelong skills. The ability to complete a piece of writing requires focus, dedication and commitment. These are all skills which employers look for in a candidate and which characterise many people that go on to be successful in adult life.

Creative writing also develops creative thinking, the pursuit of imagination, the exploration of alternatives, the broadening of thought processes and problemsolving abilities. It allows children to

8 Maidenhead I Windsor I Marlow I Ascot I Slough I Egham

develop and express their opinions and develop their own voice.

When grappling with the flow of a story, working out the beginning, middle and end and creating drama and surprises, children learn to be logical and organised. Logic, in turn, helps them in other subjects like maths, science and languages. Organisation skills can be seamlessly transferred to everyday tasks and the skill of preparation for a specific event or for the day or week ahead.

The skills learned through writing are fundamental and can be applied broadly in other areas of learning. With this comes success and increased self-confidence.

Self-confident children develop into adults who can clearly communicate their points of view, thoughts and feelings.

Creative writing has the opportunity to create an incredible positive impact on our children. While the opportunities to practice may be becoming more limited in the classroom, parents can take independent steps to encourage their children to write.

So much good can come out of it!

This article was written by Story Wars AB, a platform where writers with amazing ideas come to express them.

Story Wars Kids is a collaborative writing platform, where children can read, write, and expand on thousands of created story ideas, or even create their own. For more information visit www.storywarskids.com familiesonline.co.uk

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Tactile Toys and a Highly Effective Developmental Resource The eight My Mood Stars enable children to immerse themselves in imaginative play, either by themselves or with others. This offers a fun opportunity for children to talk about how they are feeling. Use the stars and their board to set the scene for endless stories and games to be made with characters being timid, sad, angry, happy, sleepy, surprised, scared and silly!

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ToMy find outStars more about Mood Mood have provedMy to be a veryStars, effectivevisit toy for children to talk about and acknowledge ourencouraging website www.mymoodstars.co.uk or their100533 feelings as well as the feelings of others. call: 07711

Families Thames Valley East 9

Parenting

Getting the Best out of Online Kid’s Classes

By Gabrielle Nash As parents, we’ve got used to the idea that we should minimise ‘screen time’ for our children.

However, the arrival of a global pandemic and enforced lockdown has drastically changed the way we do everything. We go online for our meetings and reunions, and joining classes and clubs online has become the only way many of our children can involve themselves regularly in extra-curricular activities.

For a large part of this year, our children have experienced activities as diverse as playball in the living room, Spanish on the sofa and cooking in your kitchen. This has become commonplace, as we try to find our ‘new normal.’

Ideally, it means our children do not miss out on life-enhancing skills and fun. For parents, it can also provide us with different ways of interacting with our children during these difficult times.

Fran and her 8 year old daughter have been trying lots of online classes: “I love the flexibility they offer. It’s hard to begin with but we’ve got used to it, and now we look forward to them like any normal class!”

In turn, offering kids’ classes online has been a life line for class and club providers and a means to stay afloat. Ettie Bettie Baby Signs is a baby signing business running classes through YouTube. Founder Charly Lewis found ways to adapt her classes to reach as many people as possible. “We use a lot of props and fancy dress in our classes. Of course I couldn’t share these physically but I was really impressed with the inventiveness of parents who came up with amazing ideas of their own.”

Ensuring your child gets the best out of an online class

they enjoy. Don’t pressure them but if their interest starts to wane, there may be ways you can get involved Make sure the classes are not too long. A young child has a limited attention span and you can’t force them to engage for longer than 45 minutes to 1 hour After the class, talk to your child about it and praise them for something they achieved. Try to find out what they enjoyed about it.

Whilst not every extra-curricular activity works online (anyone up for a virtual swimming lesson?), there are plenty that work well. The key is engagement. Find a class with a teacher that is confident with the online medium and knows how to use it to motivate kids. Theatre, dance or music-based activities can be easily transferred online, with the right teacher and parental interaction. Children will get the same benefits to their emotional and cognitive development with any performance-based activity, whether it’s in person or on a computer.

Follow Gaby on Instagram @thelondonishmum

What to Try?

If your child is old enough to understand, make sure they know about the class and what is expected of them during it

If you’re keen to start trying out some new activities, but conscious that a normal class might be unachievable, here are some great online ones to try:

Remind them before, it’s about having fun, a chance to try or learn something

Baby Signing

Make sure your technology is working and that you are ready for the Zoom a couple of minutes in advance in case of any difficulties Have a phone number on hand for the class provider in case for some reason you have tech issues Establish with the teacher, whether your involvement is necessary (dependent on your child’s age) in case you prove a distraction Make the class about your child. It’s their time to do something

If you would like something to share with baby, then signing is a lovely option for online classes. Check out Ettie Bettie Baby Sign on YouTube Languages If you’ve got a budding linguist at home, check out: Lingotot who have franchises around the UK www.lingotot.com/online-classes Cooking Maybe you want a hand in the kitchen? Cooking is a lovely activity to enjoy with your child. Try The Kids’ Kitchen www.thekidskitchen.net Science Keep those little brain cells ticking with something science!

Head to Little House of Science www.littlehouseofscience.com Performing Arts If your child has more of a spring in their step, a theatrical class might be for them. Try Anna Fiorentini Theatre & Film School www.annafiorentini.com/fiorentini-live

10 Maidenhead I Windsor I Marlow I Ascot I Slough I Egham

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Parenting

Recognising a Subtle Form of Bullying

By Tanith Carey Imagine this scene which plays out in schools up and down the country daily: A Year 4 girl, let’s call her Annabel, spots a classmate, Lisa, looking and whispering to her best friend, Eve, at break time. Later that day, Eve informs Annabel that she only wants to play with Lisa today – and the two girls sit together at lunch without saving Annabel a seat. Tearful and confused, Annabel torments herself wondering what Lisa could have said about her to Eve – or what she could have possibly done wrong.

Until relatively recently, when considering bullying, our main concern has been the physical attacks and intimidation of traditional bullying. But, in recent years, we have started to understand a much more hidden kind of social conflict. It’s relational aggression, a kind of stealth attack, using words and exclusion – and tactics like seat-saving, gossip and blanking. It mainly happens between children in the same friendship groups and classrooms. It works so well because it’s very difficult to spot and even more difficult to prove.

If Annabel had complained to her teacher that the other girls were excluding her, the teacher didn’t see the whispering, couldn’t have proved that Lisa was saying mean things and certainly couldn’t force Eve and Lisa to save Annabel a seat.

Relational aggression happens all the way through school amongst girls and boys. Among boys, it can be even harder to identify because ‘teasing’ is the actual glue that bonds boys’ friendships. By secondary school, boys may call each other by such insulting names and be so sarcastic that it’s hard for others

to tell when teasing has become hurtful and demeaning for a child.

Youngsters caught up in this type of situation may be tearful at home, find it hard to concentrate and may not want to go to school. It’s tough for parents to help because so much is going on beneath the radar. Some children may not want to admit it’s happening – they would rather put up with being treated badly than be cast out of a friendship circle.

It’s likely every child will be on the receiving end of relational aggression sometimes, so we can help our kids by showing them how to spot it, name it and draw protective boundaries around themselves.

Tanith Carey is author of The Friendship Maze: How to Help Your Child Navigate Their Way to Positive and Happier Friendships, published by Summersdale, £10.99, available from Amazon and all good bookshops.

Spotting Relational Aggression These are the most common tactics: Alliance building against a target eg name-calling, labelling and humiliation Back-turning, silent treatment and ignoring Exclusion (e.g. “You can’t sit here”) and forming exclusive cliques Sighing/eye-rolling/tutting Threats or pressure (e.g. “If you don’t do this, I won’t be your friend”) Making out that if someone objects, they are being ‘oversensitive’ or weak.

When To Get School Involved?

All kids will say mean things to each other and that includes your child. However, relational aggression crosses the line if it’s repeated, intentional and one child is more socially powerful or intimidating than another.

If two children are evenly matched, it’s preferable to give your child an awareness of what’s going on and the tactics to fight back - as this is an important lesson in developing social skills and learning how to stand up for themselves.

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Dealing with Relationship Bullying Help your child understand friendship dynamics: relational aggression is most common when one child in a group wants to force out another or raise their own status.

Help your child understand these common power-plays, how not to take it personally and how to move on to other friendship groups, if necessary.

Explain relational aggression and the roles of aggressors, targets and by-standers - those who watch and say nothing. Your child will then be better equipped to name the behaviour, spot patterns and call it out.

Show your child how to question it: it’s important that your child communicates that they will not be a victim. When an instigator says something unkind, show your child how to challenge them immediately with questions like: “Can you repeat that?” or “What do you mean?” If the other child has a clear conscience, they won’t mind answering the question.

If not, they will think twice about repeating it and your child will have made it plain they understand what is happening and will stand up to it.

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Families Thames Valley East 11

Parenting

The Importance of Toddler Play

By Dr Sarah Mundy

So, how do we initiate play? And what do we do?

A good environment is key Without overloading your child, provide toys and varied activities (which stimulate different senses) without too many distractions.

Children need to engage in both calming as well as stimulating activities, so they can differentiate between the two and learn to regulate their feelings.

You’ve made the time and created the environment.

Now what?

“One of the biggest complaints from adults about their own childhood is the lack of play with their parents” (Margot Sutherland, Child Psychotherapist, The Science of Parenting).

Play is an enjoyable part of childhood, but also an important one for the developing brain. Through play, children develop physically, emotionally, cognitively and creatively. It allows them to engage in the world in a way that feels safe, explore different roles, address fears, and develop confidence.

Children who have parents who actively play with them, learn about sharing, problem solving and decision-making more quickly than those who don’t. Playing with your child also helps you understand their world and shows them you are interested in them, both important aspects of a secure attachment relationship, which is seen as the cornerstone of a child’s development.

It’s therefore very important to make time for play with our children, even though prioritising this can sometimes be difficult.

You may feel out of your comfort zone. Try not to worry. Make play a joint venture but be led by your child. To enhance connection, Dan Hughes, clinical psychologist, refers to the process of ‘follow, lead, follow’ – let your child explore; show enjoyment; mirror what they are doing and build upon it for them, so that they can expand their play repertoire. Try to stick to their agenda, not yours. Repetition is an important part of learning and completely normal – even if dull for you!

Make playtime count Attachment play focuses on connection. It is characterised by shared activities involving eye contact and mirroring – like peek-a-boo, drumming together and messy play. Letting children take the lead and being accepting, not critical, helps them learn and strengthens your connection. To maximise play time, turn housework into a game! Incorporate play and physical activity too – time spent in natural spaces outdoors is also good for both your wellbeing.

Dr Sarah Mundy is Consultant Clinical Psychologist and Author of Parenting Through Stories.

More info at www.parentingthroughstories.com

Playing and Playfulness

My Toddler is on Screens More - Is this Okay?

Playing is the act of doing; playfulness is a way of BEING! Both are hugely important. Playfulness keeps communication positive, light and fun. Children are more likely to feel that they are enjoyable to be around, giving them a positive sense of who they are.

In the throes of the current pandemic, many parents are struggling to prioritise traditional play and are allowing their children more screen time. The effect touchscreens have on children (particularly toddlers) remains unclear, although research is underway at the University of Bristol.

Being playful can help resolve conflicts and defuse difficult situations. When parents are rushed and tired, we tend to focus on getting quick results. Instead, try taking a deep breath and getting creative; the reward will be the chance to connect with your child, whilst also achieving the result that you wanted.

There is some evidence that screen time can disrupt babies’ and toddlers’ sleep (Smith, 2017). However, other researchers report that touchscreens provide rewarding interaction with varied sensory and cognitive stimulation and that this may have positive impacts upon attention, fine motor control and other developmental areas.

Eg: Reframe “You need to get dressed” as “Can you hop into your trousers like a frog?”

Adopt playfulness as a helpful attitude - make up rhymes and do silly dances. Laughter stimulates the release of feel-good chemicals, aids relaxation, increases positive feelings and improves relationships.

When you can’t be playful, don’t worry. Some of us find it easier than others and it’s hard to be light-hearted when life feels overwhelming. But practice DOES help!

The impact of touchscreens seems to depend upon the usage. If the content is developmentally and educationally appropriate then it is far more likely to have a positive impact upon children’s development than more passive watching of screens.* So before you beat yourself up about not playing with your children as much as you’d like, remember that some active engagement in educational games on screens may actually be a positive thing. *Source: www.psychologicalscience.org/publications/observer/obsonline/ toddlers-and-touchscreens-a-science-in-development.html

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Education

find

a class

near you

berkshire@turtletots.com 07436 881137

Established 1980 Providing care and education for ages 2-6 years within a nurturing environment.

Ofsted Outstanding in all areas.

FREE Montessori Education for funded 2-3 year olds We can provide 15 and 30 hours across all 5 days if required (6 hours a day).

OPEN DAY Monday 23rd Nov 10am to 12 noon Home Park, Romney Lock Road, Windsor SL4 6HX Tel: 01753 868399 OR 01344 844592 e.menik@windsor-montessori.com

www.windsormontessorischool.co.uk

Thames Valley East

Thames Valley East

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Families Thames Valley East 13

Christmas

Shop Local this Christmas

This year we’ve decide to ‘shop local’ as much as possible to help support local businesses during these tricky times. Not only does this keep local businesses open, but it’s a great way to give a gift with a difference and one that will be gratefully received. You can also bet that these businesses make ethical choices. Here are our top picks of local businesses that can supply you with that unique gift you are seeking out!

Hugo’s Workshop

Cricketers Gin

Little Cooks Co

Hugo’s Workshop based in Maidenhead, offers a range of unique, handcrafted wooden boards that make beautiful gifts for any occasion.

If you’re looking for inspiration to make Christmas special this year, their product range includes chopping boards, photo frames, quirky G&T boards that friends will envy, medal displays for the sports achiever in your family and even letterbox gifts.

All can be personalised with engraved messages for that extra special touch and owner Rebecca is always willing to try and accommodate bespoke pieces should customers have an idea of their own – she made a beautiful hanging board incorporating a bottle opener for my husband’s birthday recently.

The founders of Cricketers Gin; daughter and father, Rachel & David, had no idea they were about to launch an artisan gin brand a few months before a global pandemic. Their new artisan London Dry Gin, received an extremely positive response after launch last November, then 2020 began! Despite this, Cricketers Gin founders have persevered and even with lockdown in operation they managed to launch their gin miniatures; become a finalist in the global Gin Guide Awards; win the Theo Paphitis Small Business Awards; and have just launched a new pink gin.

Letterbox kits have proven to be ideal boredom busters over the last few months and having been gifted some Little Cooks Co recipe boxes from Grandparents which have proved a massive hit in our house, we think they’d make the perfect Christmas gift.

Founded by local mum and nutritionist, Helen, these monthly baking kits comprise easy-to-follow recipe cards with step-by-step instructions, all the organic dry ingredients necessary to complete your healthy bake, plus fun activities and extras.

www.hugosworkshop.co.uk

If one of your Christmas Eve traditions involves leaving a mince pie and a drink out for Father Christmas, Hugo’s solid oak serving boards are the ideal way to display your treats.

Visit www.hugosworkshop.co.uk and use code OAK10 for 10% off your first order. Or pop into the Maidenhead Gift Emporium 65 St Mark’s Rd SL6 6DP which also stocks some of the range. info@hugosworkshop.co.uk 07904 954454.

www.cricketersgin.com

Cricketers new pink gin ‘Berry Blush’ is “a classic gin with delicate raspberry tones and a subtle sweetness”, describes Rachel.

Pinkneys Green in Berkshire is home to three of the local botanicals featured in Cricketers Gin; wild marjoram, milk thistle and blackberries. These unique flavours harmonise with zesty orange, spicy coriander, and subtle tones of liquorice, delivering an exquisitely smooth juniper-forward gin, showcasing Cricketers Gin provenance. Berry Blush is distilled with organic raspberries offering a delicate sweetness to a classic gin.

www.littlecooksco.co.uk

The kits are available to order on a 3, 6 or 12 month gift plan, starting at £8.33 per month, with the first kit including an annual record book to allow kids to keep a record of their baking fun. If you don’t want to commit to a regular box, single kits are available and they also offer virtual party boxes so your friends and family could join you in a Christmas bake from their own houses!

Cooking together is a great way to spend time together and the range of recipes are the perfect reminder that healthy, nutritious choices are tasty and certainly don’t have to be boring.

Little Cooks Co boxes are available to order from www.littlecooksco.co.uk

A locally produced gin would make for a gorgeous Christmas gift. Also take a look at their gorgeous range of ‘Gin Heaven Hampers’ at www.cricketersgin.com

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Spirit and Grace

Strawberry Grove

Stoke Park

Whether you are looking for style inspiration, a Christmas gift for someone special, or just a little treat for yourself why not try Spirit and Grace Style. Born out of a passion for beautiful jewellery and accessories, this boutique is a treasure trove of women’s fashion accessories, gorgeous jewellery and great gifts ideas. Based in Holyport, you can also be assured you’ll be supporting a great local business too.

Strawberry Grove has wonderful cafes in Maidenhead, Lane End and Marlow, plus their online delivery offerings have really taken off since the pandemic.

They sell lots of amazing produce including market boxes, butchers boxes, fruit, veg, jams, condiments, baked breads and cakes, garden plants and much more.

Founded in 1908, and based in Stoke Poges, Stoke Park is the perfect place to enjoy life in a five star, friendly atmosphere in extensive grounds steeped in history. While breaks abroad are tricky right now, a trip out for a little bit of luxury is the perfect way to escape.

www.spiritandgracestyle.com

From beautiful leather crossbody bags and stunning interchangeable bag straps, statement costume to delicate sterling silver jewellery, stylish scarves and absolutely fabulous t-shirts, all at a great price point, there’s something for everyone at Spirit & Grace Style.

‘Curator-In-Chief’, Katie Topping, uses her years of experience and eye for style to curate a range of stunning pieces, all of which are available for online shopping.

www.strawberrygrove.co.uk

We’ve also noticed they also have a ‘special occasion’ section which could make for a perfect gift including Christmas hampers (which can be bespoke to your choice of items) afternoon tea, prosecco, occasion cakes, cupcakes and coffee. Vouchers and gift-wrapping services are also available, which could really add to the perfect local Christmas gift.

Go to their online store to find out more. www.strawberrygrove.co.uk/delivery

Katie Topping, says, “I love how an outfit can be enhanced or changed simply by adding an amazing piece of jewellery, popping on a gorgeous scarf, or by using a fabulous leather bag!”

www.stokepark.com

You may find yourself in the The Pennsylvania Suite where scenes from Bridget Jones were shot, or on the golf course where James Bond had a tense round or two with Goldfinger!

Vouchers can be the ideal Christmas gift, especially when they can be used for a hotel staycation, one to one spa treatments, sports and leisure, afternoon tea or a meal out. Whether you want to give someone a gift which gives them a break from the children or enables them to book a family afternoon tea, Stoke Park would be delighted to accommodate these needs.

Visit the website for more details or to purchase gift vouchers. www.stokepark.com

Gorgeous accessories for the perfect Christmas gift and more can be found at www.spiritandgracestyle.com

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Families Thames Valley East 15

How to make Christmas Special

With social distancing measures still likely to be in place, gatherings with the wider family postponed and visits to the big man himself harder to come by, everyone is doing Christmas a little differently this year. Different doesn’t have to mean less special however and here at Families we’ve put together our suggestions for where to visit locally and other ideas to make this Christmas one to remember.

All events will need prior booking. Tickets were still available at the time of going to print.

Everyone’s favourite arts venue has three shows on offer this Christmas!

With three shows coming to their stage this year, Norden Farm in Maidenhead have family Christmas entertainment covered.

Their first offering, Oldilocks and the 3 bears, which runs 26 -28 November, is a funny and warmhearted celebration of the classic story, starring a naughty old lady who looks very familiar… and 3 funny bears who love their breakfast. Expect to be spellbound by lovingly crafted puppets, music and some steaming bowls of porridge!

On stage 10-12 December, The Magic Porridge Pot and Other Tasty Tales, boasts two stories told with puppets, pop up sets and original music that will delight and entertain even the fussiest of foodies!

Or why not try Pinocchio, a one man-show which sees Pinocchio himself carved on stage. The use of clever illusion enables brushes to become a fox and the shadow of two saws to transform into a giant shark! Running from 22-24 December, an element of improvisation makes each performance unique to its audience.

At Norden Farm, every care has been taken to ensure safety is paramount with government advice being continually monitored. All events will have reduced capacity and socially distanced seating, plus they are even available to stream online, so you can enjoy the magic from the comfort of your own sofa.

Fee fi fo fum...

It’s time for Maidenhead panto fun!

HA Events are delighted to present this year’s COVID secure pantomime, Jack and the Beanstalk – a GIANT of a show suitable for the whole family!

Join them at Maidenhead’s new Braywick Leisure Centre in the Baylis Theatre and get ready to roar with laughter as we cheer on our hero Jack on his climb to defeat the Giant, save the village and his best friend – Daisy the cow!

Packed with all the traditions of pantomime (plus a few extra treats!) and featuring the feisty, fun loving Dame Trott., Expect charming animated scenery, sensational songs, delightful costumes, plenty of audience participation and belly laughing comedy.

Producer, David Kemp, commented, “The health and safety of our patrons and staff is paramount and we have taken necessary actions to ensure your 2020 pantomime experience is a safe festive treat! We have socially distanced seating and have planned frequent cleaning in the theatre, plus sanitisation stations on arrival, a one-way traffic flow and temperature checks.”

The hilarious double act, Niall Hemmingway and Chris Sheridan, will lead in the comical roles Dame and Jack Trott, plus joined by previous Maidenhead panto stars, Victoria Collins as Jill, Rachael Blaney as Green Fairy and Callum John Hill as evil Fleshcreep.

Performances run twice daily between 19th-24th December.

Tickets are available from www.maidenheadpanto.co.uk or by calling the booking agent on 0333 666 3366.

D COVI E R U SEC

HA Events Ltd present

The perfect alternative to the traditional pantomime, there’s something for everyone at Norden Farm. Tickets are available from www.nordenfarm.org or by calling the box office on 01628 788997

ick Brayw tre, e Cen Leisur head n Maide 16 Maidenhead I Windsor I Marlow I Ascot I Slough I Egham

BOOKING AGENT: 0333 666 336 www.maidenheadpanto.co.uk familiesonline.co.uk

Christmas weekend at the Chiltern open air museum Find out how Christmas was celebrated in the past with a special Christmas weekend opening on 5 and 6 December. There will be a small artisan Christmas market perfect for a spot of Christmas shopping and some of the Museum’s historic buildings will be traditionally decorated for Christmas.

Grounds and Gardens Admission £5 per person. Free standard admission for annual pass holders. Numbers are restricted for safety. Please pre-book tickets online and ensure that you select the date of either the 5th or 6th December.

Newland Park, Gorelands Lane, Chalfont St Giles HP8 4AB www.coam.org.uk/events/christmas-event

Experience a virtual magical sleigh ride at Longachres From 16 November, join Dash on a magical adventure as you test drive Santa’s new sleigh in 4D virtual reality!

A magical way to get your family ready for Christmas in a safe and exciting environment. Tickets are £5 per person and you can book from two to four people per ride; once any tickets are sold for your selected time slot then no one else can ride with you to ensure your bubble of friends & family is protected. Once you’re on the ride and in Santa’s sleigh you will be given a freshly cleaned and fully adjustable VR headset.

For younger children the same content will play simultaneously on a TV situated at the front of the ride. Sit back and enjoy this immersive show as the sleigh moves, the wind blows and you experience the magic of 4D virtual reality!

Longachres garden centre in Bagshot has ensured social distancing is in place in the woodland walk waiting area and entrance and exits to the ride are completely separate. Sessions last 5 minutes.

Longacres Garden Centre Ltd, London Road, Bagshot GU19 5JB. www.longacres.co.uk

Experience Christmas in the wizarding world Get into the festive spirit as the annual Hogwarts in the Snow feature returns to the Warner Bros. Studios with more snow than ever!

For the very first time, you’re invited to explore another of your favourite sets in the snow as Diagon Alley undergoes a wintery transformation. As you step into the authentic Great Hall set, you’ll be welcomed with wreaths, garlands and trees topped with witches on miniature broomsticks.

The Gryffindor common room and Boys’ dormitory will be decorated with the original props including handmade Christmas cards and fireplaces throughout the Studio Tour (including those in the Leaky Cauldron and Great Hall) will be ‘lit’ with special effects fire.

Hogwarts in the snow runs Saturday 14 November 2020 – Sunday 17 January 2021. Tickets must be pre-booked, and all extra features are included in the ticket price Warner Bros. Studio Tour London, Studio Tour Drive, Leavesden WD25 7LR www.wbstudiotour.co.uk/whats-on/hogwarts-in-the-snow familiesonline.co.uk

Illuminated light trail at Blenheim Palace The Illuminated Light Trail will be even more spectacular this year with new installations including Blue Neuron and Heart of Stars. Wrap up warm and walk through breath-taking light displays with your family to enjoy the Palace gardens like never before. Blenheim offers the perfect outdoor Christmas experience.

2020 brings new surprises from the Heart of the Stars scattering shards of light across the lawn to a scented fire garden that adorns the Water Terrace. Walk towards dynamic, colour-changing neon tunnels, lakeside reflections and onto a mesmerising place where, beneath the branches of a sprawling tree, softly glows the fairy-fire known as Will-o-the-Wisps.

The Palace will still be open for you to come and enjoy the lavish state rooms including the Cecily Brown Contemporary Art Exhibition. The Christmas trees will be up and the fires lit ready to give visitors a warm welcome. www.blenheimpalace.com/christmas-new

See the magic of Lapland in the UK LaplandUK is an original adaptation of the Father Christmas story and the secret world of the elves brought to life through a 4-hour immersive experience of unprecedented scale and quality, as well as stories and interactive activities.

This year, families will enjoy all aspects of the experience together in their individual ‘family bubbles’ and there will be plenty of measures in place to ensure safety is paramount.

14 November - 24 December 2020.

Whitmoor Forest, Swinley Road, Winkfield Row, Ascot www.laplanduk.co.uk

Legoland at Christmas The annual festive event transforms the Park into a winter wonderland, complete with twinkling lights, snow dusted trees, and of course…a sprinkling of LEGO® magic!

This year the park is also gearing up for some LEGO Friends Carol Singing, a fun DUPLO Puppet pantomime and an amazing Holiday Harbour lights show featuring a very special guest.

Whilst Father Christmas won’t be able to invite anyone into his Grotto this year due to social distancing, you and your family will be able to see him as he makes his way through the park on his very own magical sleigh. Don’t forget to wave to his elves! www.legoland.co.uk

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Christmas Winter Light - an extravaganza of magical lights and gardens aglow at Waddesdon The House is not open this Christmas due to social distancing protocols, so instead Waddesdon have focused on creating an outdoor Winter Light experience that delivers just as much magic and sparkle, but in a way that visitors can safely enjoy.

Gardens ablaze with light, using a variety of state-of-the-art effects, will bring the extraordinary landscape and woodland to life. Visitors will also be treated to the spectacle of the façade of the Manor illuminated with dancing lights set to music. There is also a 30-day long Christmas Fair to delight shoppers.

Winter Light gets underway on Saturday 14 November 2020 and runs Sunday 3 January 2021 (Wed-Sun, 12noon-7.30pm). www.waddesdon.org.uk

Enjoy a socially distanced breakfast with Santa at Dorney Court Take your little helpers down to Crocus at Dorney Court this December to enjoy a jolly good breakfast with Santa. All children will receive an ‘Elves breakfast’ which includes a free-range fried egg, bacon and beans with toast, decorate their own gingerbread and receive a gift.

This year things will be very different, but the elves will be working very hard to keep everyone safe.

8.30am - 10.15am. £14.95 per child. Adults £10.95. For more information or to book: 01628 669 999, or email admin.dorney@crocus.co.uk Crocus at Dorney Court, Court Lane, Dorney, SL4 6QP

Christmas 2020 at Norden Farm

Garlic Theatre presents

Oldilocks and the 3 Bears

Thur 26 - Sat 28 Nov 3+ 11.30am and 2pm YEARS

Showstopping illuminated trail returns to Kew Gardens Returning for its eighth year, Kew’s sell-out winter trail is back with old favourites and brand new light installations, bringing a touch of magic to the London festive calendar. Visitors can expect bursts of colour and enchanting optics as they explore Kew Gardens’ UNESCO World Heritage landscape after dark.

This year, a new route takes visitors through Kew Gardens’ beautifully illuminated Rose Garden with highlights including a canopy of stars, neon-wrapped trees and another spectacular light show at the Treetop Walkway.

Additional safety measures will be in place to ensure an enjoyable experience for all. These will include: a one-way system on the trail; the use of additional gates for entry and exit; additional time slots to help spread the arrivals and flow of visitors; and stringent cleaning practices. Rather than a concentrated ‘catering village’ as at previous events, food stalls will also be spread across the trail. Visitors can book tickets safe in the knowledge that if Covid-19 developments require cancellations, they can re-book their slot or get a full refund.

Sandra Botterell, Director of Marketing and Commercial Enterprise at Royal Botanic Gardens, Kew, says: “In a year that has been challenging for many, we are delighted to host Christmas at Kew, and have been working hard behind the scenes to ensure that it will be a safe event for all. I am sure you will agree that we could all do with a bit of festive cheer, and I am confident that a wander through our spectacular Gardens, illuminated by over one million lights, will bring joy to our visitors this winter.”

The trail runs Wednesday 18 November 2020 – Sunday 3 January 2021. 4–10pm (advance booking only). www.kew.org/christmas

Theatre of Widdershins present

The Magic Porridge Pot Thur 10 - Sat 12 Dec 11.30am and 2pm

Traditional Pantomime comedy capers at Theatre Royal Windsor

3+

YEARS

Indefinite Articles present

4+

YEARS

Pinocchio

Tues 22 - Thur 24 Dec 11.30am and 2pm

Cinderella is on at the Theatre Royal Windsor from Thursday 19th November 2020 – Sunday 10th January.

The panto features the theatre’s traditional pantomime comedy capers, with a sprinkle of fairy dust, dazzling dancers, colourful costumes and a glittering star cast featuring Movie Legend and star of The Real Marigold Hotel Britt Ekland and not forgetting the little fox with the big laugh … Basil Brush! www.theatreroyalwindsor.co.uk

Tickets from £11.50 | Live Stream tickets £15 per household

Centre for the Arts Maidenhead

01628 788997 www.nordenfarm.org

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Christmas Ideas to keep you entertained at home!

Reverse advent calendars

Keeping the spirit of ‘giving’ alive - especially during difficult times - why not try an advent calendar which is focused on offering a good dead or a donation to a foodbank every day in December?

Often referred to as ‘reverse’ advent calendars, you and the family could have fun designing and making these up yourselves! You just predetermine what happens each day - it could simply be to donate a tin of peas one day, donate some pasta the next and so on.

Berkshire Christmas elves

Look out for Berkshire Christmas Helper Elves on Facebook where families get involved in making Christmas special for those who need a bit of extra help. Last year our children loved being elves, picking out and wrapping gifts for another child, which was a great way to learn about the true spirit of Christmas.

Zooms for kids

Maybe your kids can’t see their cousins this year, so perhaps arrange for them to meet on zoom with a well-structured game.

Generally speaking, just setting up a zoom for a chat with young children is hard work, but with structure it can work really well.

Some activities may require an adult to help, or a simple movie or traditional board game with treats may give you an hour’s peace! An adult could arrange a scavenger hunt which involves each child finding an object in their house and the first to bring it back and show it on zoom wins a point (this could be toy-based, shape-based, word-based or colour based for few ideas!).

Look out for the House Party app which already has quizzes and games setup.

Creativity for kids

If you’re spending more time indoors this year, why not get busy making Christmas decorations, baking treats together or even perform a play or a magic show. Enlist older children to write the lines and give parts to the whole family. You could even dish out prizes for the most inventive costume.

For a fun sleepover alternative, why not build a Christmas den in your lounge, decorate it with fairy lights, set up a Christmas film to watch and then let the kids sleep in it overnight. Adult participation is optional!

While we can’t get out quite so much, why not make your garden work that little bit harder this year by creating a Winter Wonderland. Fairy lights, hanging sparkly jam jars and decorations from trees, fire pits, outside heaters and blankets could bring that space to life! Get the children to get involved and celebrate with some toasted marshmallows! Adults could even make sure there is a bar serving mulled wine.

❄ ❄❄ ❄ ❄ ❄

❄

WIN Toys from our Gift Guide

Conversation Cards

Knitted Diplodocus

Vroom Vroom Plate

Micro Scooter

Space Magnetic Pack

Sword & Shield Set

Driving Experience

(child 10-17 yrs)

Enter at familiesmag.co.uk/go

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Families Thames Valley East 19

Christmas

How to Have a Thrifty Christmas The pandemic, lockdown, a slowdown in the economy, and job losses have affected many people’s finances across the UK. So here are some great festive money-saving tips, so you can enjoy Christmas without breaking the bank.

Set a budget Work out what you are going to spend on food, decoration, entertainment and gifts. It’s easy to get carried away when you are Christmas shopping. Work out what you are going to spend on each child, friend, and family member and stick to it.

Shop around Get the best price! Shopping guru and blogger, Samara Shahzad from Gift Goonie (www.giftgoonie.com) says: “When I shop online I always go on to Google, type the product I want and then click the shopping tab at the top. This brings up the product I want, where I can buy it from (online and in-store), and the price it’s available for. Sometimes the difference in prices can be vast and sometimes you get a small saving.”

shortbread with flour, butter, and sugar. For a selection box, flavour some with orange or lemon zest/essence, dip some in chocolate, coat some in icing. Use leftover dry ingredients (nothing that will perish quickly) to make baking gift sets. For example, a sealed jar with the dry ingredients for biscuits, a handwritten label with the recipe, and a pretty cookie cutter.”

Go foraging

“Keep an eye out for baking ingredient discounts around Stir-Up Sunday (mid-November). Stock up on dried goods if you are planning on baking for Christmas.

Home décor influencer, Abi Hugo, has some great tips for Christmas decorations. “Gather pinecones, fir tree branches, green foliage, evergreen plants, and festive berries in your local woods or park. They can be transformed into lots of different decor items, such as wreaths, table runners, centre-pieces, and mantle decor.” She adds: “A branch with decorations hanging off it can be stunning – it is very Scandi and Hygge. Hanging dried fruit with some string from a piece of driftwood can look really festive - you can dry oranges and apples on a low heat in your oven. The best part is they’ll make your house smell wonderful.

You can get the kids baking gifts. Make a large batch of simple

For more inspiration, follow Abi on Instagram @thewhitethistle

Get baking Save money by making your own mince pies or sweet treats as gifts. Rhiannon Abbott, from The Epsom Bakehouse (www. theepsombakehouse.co.uk) says:

Christmas Cash Saving Tips

Save on Festive Food

Money coach Emma Maslin has a few simple steps that can save you money when Christmas shopping.

After gifts, the Christmas food shop is the next biggest expense for families over the holiday season. Get a head start on these purchases to avoid the whole cost of Christmas ending up on the credit card.

Sign up for a free 30 day trial with Amazon Prime to give you access to free delivery (as well as other benefits).

Download a savings printable at www.themoneywhisperer. co.uk and calculate the total amount which you need to save for Christmas. Divide it by the number of weeks to go for a weekly savings target.

An app like Chip or Plum takes the emotion out of saving.

They use artificial intelligence to read your bank account (using Open Banking technology) and ‘skim’ off money, which they determine you can afford to save after paying your bills and living expenses. You can set saving goals within the app.

Change the screensaver on your phone to an image of your child’s most wanted toy. If you are tempted to succumb to a frivolous purchase, you’ll be reminded of what you are potentially sacrificing.

Follow Emma on Instagram @themoneywhisperer_/ 20 Maidenhead I Windsor I Marlow I Ascot I Slough I Egham

Thrifty Mum (www.thriftymum.com), Hollie Hutchinson, shares her tips.

Make sure you budget for ALL your Christmas food and drink, not just the Christmas dinner. Factor boxes of biscuits, nuts, wine and chocs to see you through to the New Year.

Start right now by spending an extra few pounds each week to buy some of those extra Christmas treats. This way you can reduce the big hit on your income in December.

Check out the offers in the frozen food aisle. Buying extra frozen veggies now will ensure all you have to do come Christmas week is defrost and reheat!

Plan whose house you’ll be eating at (Covid-permitting) and how to share the cost. You could even suggest some potluck meals where each person brings a course each. familiesonline.co.uk

Christmas

How Many Toys Does a Child Need?

By Andrew Campbell Toys have a way of taking over. Of course, it starts innocently enough. As a parent you love your child and you want to make them happy. But before you know it, you find yourself kneedeep in discarded Lego and naked Barbie dolls. The children are bored; the house is a mess; no one is happy!

Toys are easy to come by these days. Equally, parents who cannot spend as much time with their children as they would like may try to occupy them with new toys or assuage their guilt with gifts. We may also feel a compulsion to buy our children things to show we love them, or equally powerfully, feel a desire for our children to have more than we did.

The reality though is that most families have too many toys. And sadly, more toys actually equals less play.

So why is this?

Children are easily overwhelmed with choice, and a child who is unsure of what to play with often ends up playing with nothing at all.

But the problem is even more fundamental. Our obsession with flashy plastic junk has taught our children to be passive participants in play. Instead of playing with toys, they expect to be amused by them. And they are… for about five seconds. Then it is back to the toy box.

According to a study published in the journal Infant Behaviour and Development, an environment with fewer toys is better for children. The study observed thirty six toddlers. Some

were given four toys, and some sixteen. It was found that an abundance of toys actually reduced the quality of toddlers’ play.

Fewer toys helped toddlers focus better and play more creatively.

And it’s not just about the quantity of toys. The quality is also factor. Another study by the American Academy of Pediatrics found that the best toys for constructive play are non-electronic ones: the ones that are simpler and support parents and children playing, pretending, and interacting together.

More and more families are taking a ‘minimalist’ approach to toys - cutting back on the clutter and focusing on quality over quantity.

With Christmas approaching, now may be a good time to consider this approach.

There are lots of gifts that will give your child more long-lasting enjoyment than toys, and, in many cases, create memories that will be special to them in years to come.

Every Sunday at 2.30pm Maidenhead Club Braywick Leisure Centre (Sports Hall) Braywick Road Maidenhead SL6 1BN Tel: 07709 327274 or 07885 294418 Please call to book your place.

Email: tiska.karate@btconnect.com

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Christmas

Christmas if You’re Separated

By Rebecca Giraud and Bob Greig All separated parents have a puzzle to solve at Christmas.

How are you going to create a Christmas that is affordable, achievable, pleases the kids and works for your child’s other parent. None of this is easy…

We asked 200 hundred separated parents to reflect on the pressures they face at Christmas and to recall their favourite Christmas memories from their own childhoods. The results were fascinating and offered us some invaluable insight into solving the puzzle of Christmas.

Keep it simple Your kids will not thank you for spending hours shopping and then sweating in the kitchen throughout Christmas. They may like a nice meal on Christmas Day but there are literally millions of them who simply think it interrupts the fun and games. There is so much pressure to go overboard at this time of year. If Christmas really is a time for children, it is your time they are after, nothing else. Not really.

Don’t try and re-create the Christmas Day you had with your ex.

Try something different and create a new way of celebrating.

In our experience, friends can come into their own (COVIDpermitting) and can add a new and exciting dimension to the festivities.

Chill about gifts Don’t turn present giving into a competition with the other parent. And try if possible to communicate with them around

Time with the Other Parent Geography and work commitments can make co-parenting difficult. However, try to agree early what’s happening and when over the Christmas period so that there is no confusion for the children. This also allows you to plan your time should you be alone.

Covid will bring changes to the way we spend Christmas this year so clear communication with extended family is going to be even more important.

In some cases communication between the two of you may be really difficult. But, if it’s safe, we encourage parents to make every effort to ensure children spend time with both parents over the holiday.

We know many separated families work an ‘alternate year’ schedule very successfully with zooms and phone calls built into the festivities.

You can also find helpful advice in our article on how to have a successful handover at www.onlymums.org/information

22 Maidenhead I Windsor I Marlow I Ascot I Slough I Egham

gifts. Money can be a real worry at Christmas so research celebrating on a budget. The parents we spoke to reported that presents were one of their least important childhood memories of Christmas. It’s worth noting!

Enjoy fun & games The reason kids like Monopoly and jigsaws at Christmas is that it keeps you right next to them for hours! In truth, for many of us it’s the only time of year that ever really happens. If your kids are lucky enough to have grandparents, get them involved. One in five of the parents we talked to named their single best memory of Christmas as having their grandparents around.

Remember Christmas is mainly about time with the children.

Play Monopoly - buy the railway stations as they provide a steady income and wear your paper hat!

Rebecca Giraud & Bob Greig are co-directors of Only Mums (www.onlymums.org) and Only Dads (www.onlydads.org), a social enterprise that supports mums and dads going through separation.

Sharing the Kids or Child Free and Isolated?

Sometimes a compromise is reached around Christmas Day itself with the children spending time in both homes.

It’s worth noting that those we spoke to who had experienced this as children reflected that the transition was never easy and that they sometimes felt it was more about the parents accommodating each other than about them.

If your children will not be with you at Christmas, it can be a very lonely time. And the stream of scenes in shops and films of ‘happy families’ can make matters worse.

So, it’s vital that you look after yourself. If you can, be with friends or family or someone who is in a similar situation to you.

You’ll discover that your children do not want to think of one of their parents all alone at this time of year.

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Book Club We’ve all spent a lot more family time together at home in 2020 and I’m sure I’m not alone in having experienced both the highs and lows that have come with living on top of each other over the last few months. I can’t say I loved home schooling, though I do have some fond memories of that time (as well as some I’d rather forget), but something I have enjoyed is sharing stories with my children and watching them lose themselves in a good book. Now is a great time to be nurturing a love of books, letting our imaginations run wild and having all sorts of adventures from the comfort of our sofa.

This month Rachel Bailey interviews bestselling picture book creator Benji Davies whose new book The Snowflake is published in October and Families have two hardback copies to give away!

@Benji_Davies 2020 has been a strange year. What’s been your highlight and the thing you’ve struggled with most?

The highs and lows have been accentuated, particularly in the early part of lockdown! It was difficult having to work from the spare room with my 3 year old daughter being part of that environment.

It was also lovely to be at home more, to spend time in our garden having lunch, or looking for insects. All the sunshine enabled us to grow tomatoes together. My daughter and I also made some reading videos of my books for people to enjoy at home.

They’re still on YouTube if you search for #BenjiDaviesReads Having studied animation at university, what made you take the leap from film to becoming a published author?

I was working as an animation director on commercials while also doing a bit of illustration for other authors, but really, I wanted to tell my own stories. I had been tinkering with an idea to turn an animated film I had made as a student into a picture book. One day I was in Whitstable and the oyster huts there looked like the perfect setting for my ‘whale story’. I made some sketches and took photos then set about working the storyboards from the film into something that resembled the format of a picture book. It took a while longer to get it right but a few years later The Storm Whale was published, and I haven’t looked back since.

Benjidaviesdraws

@benjidavies

Do you have any advice for other budding authors/illustrators?

Like anything you only get good with practice so you have to draw as much as you can.

Write about the things you like. Make up the sort of stories or poems you would like to read, and then illustrate them with pictures you enjoy looking at.

If they don’t live up to your expectations, try again. Try using a different pen, paint or paper. Read good books and look at great art. Do whatever you can - just keep going.

That’s how I did it, I’m proof that it works!

Is there a book you wish you had written/illustrated?

A Christmas Eve favourite for me and my sisters, read to us by our mum, was The Night Before Christmas illustrated

by Cyndy Szekeres. Such a magical and simple narrative that captures the feeling of anticipation and wonder that time of year brings. Cyndy’s illustration places a family of mice at the heart of the poem, living in the stump of a tree awaiting a visit from a tiny Saint Nick and his eight little reindeer. One page turn sees the smallest mouse taking a moment on his potty - which always had us in fits of giggles. Fond memories and a big influence on my work.

The Snowflake explores the idea that we all need to find our place in the world. Was having a young daughter the inspiration behind this story?

Both The Storm Whale and Grandad’s Island have been adapted for the stage. How did you feel seeing them in that medium?

The Snowflake follows the story of two characters - a snowflake looking for somewhere to land and a little girl called Noelle who is waiting for snow to fall.

It was a real honour to see my work adapted for theatre. To see actors taking on the characters, and some of the visual cues from the book in threedimensions on set - Grandad’s jumper or the old trunk he keeps in the attic, the toucans and parakeets - made into real props and costumes and to see them come to life was really magical.

My daughter was the inspiration for how Noelle looks. A good few years ago my dad suggested that I write a story about a snowflake’s journey. I dismissed it at the time, but ideas are often small seeds that grow subconsciously. They collect other ideas and gradually come together. This one came back to me and I really felt the journey of this snowflake - of falling - perhaps the snowflake that didn’t want to fall. It seemed to me to be a way of describing the uncertainty that we often face. It feels so relevant right now.

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www.benjidavies.com

What’s your favourite way to spend time with your family at home?

We love reading books together and also sitting down at the weekend with a good family film that we can all enjoy. I’m a big Studio Ghibli fan so it’s been a real treat to have so many of their films now available on Netflix and to be able to introduce my daughter to them. Especially My Neighbour Totoro, which we all love.

Do you have any family Christmas traditions or anything you are planning to do differently to make Christmas special this year?

Each year we have a local screening of Raymond Brigg’s The Snowman with a live brass band. It’s not looking likely that will be able to happen this year so we will have to watch it at home. But that’s how I watched it as a child and was always captivated, sitting by the Christmas tree munching on sugared almonds as Walking in The Air drifted through the house. So, we will be very much looking forward to that!

The Snowflake is available now in hardback priced £12.99. www.benjidavies.com

Families have two copies of The Snowflake to give away!

WIN!

For your chance to win, all you have to do is answer the question below and email your answer to: competitions@familiestveast.co.uk What is the name of Benji’s new book?

A The Snow B The Snowflake C The Winter Closing date for entries is 10 Dec 2020

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Families Thames Valley East 23

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