[New] Tackling toddler tantrums

By Sarah Ockwell-Smith

The ‘terrible twos’ aren’t called that for nothing! This stage of a child’s life is all about big feelings. Scientifically, it relates to the undeveloped prefrontal brain cortex meaning a child is unable to regulate their own emotions.

What is a tantrum?

Tantrums describe the state of an individual who is out of control, full of big emotions and stress hormones and unable to calm themselves down. Tantrums can happen right into adulthood but adults learn to self-soothe.

Toddlers don’t possess these skills yet. They are not being naughty or manipulative, they are simply being toddlers. Tantrums are a normal and exceedingly common feature of child development. Research has found that nearly nine in ten children between 18 months and 2 years regularly have tantrums, with most having at least one a day, lasting on average between thirty and sixty seconds (although it is not uncommon for them to occur far more frequently and last for much longer).

‘No’ to the naughty step

Contrary to popular belief, ignoring, shaming or punishing tantrums can make a toddler’s behaviour much worse. These approaches ignore a child’s difficult underlying feelings and don’t resolve the cause or help the toddler regulate their behaviour. Experts have discovered just how much infant brains are affected by the level of parental care they receive. With nurturing attention, the part of their brains responsible for regulating emotion become better connected as they grow. READ MORE