Families Hampshire North Sep/Oct 2020 (Print)

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Contents Contents

Welcome - we’re celebrating!

Hampshire North

There are some reasons to celebrate as we head into autumn.

Issue 40 I Sept/Oct 2020

Editor Rebecca Carr editor@familieshampshirenorth.co.uk 07789 882 467 Advertising Claire Clarricoates claire.clarricoates@familiespublishing.co.uk 07812 218331 Printed by Holbrooks Printers Ltd. Next issue November/December Booking deadline 16 October Published 6 times per year. If you would like copies for your establishment contact us.

Cover image Depositphotos

Connect with us on Social Media

Firstly, we’re back in print for the first time since March.

Whilst we’ve been busy online for the last few months - you may have read our digital “lockdown” issues - it feels great to be able to provide you with a hard copy of our magazine as usual.

And this autumn is also special as it marks the 30 year anniversary of Families Magazine, first launched in London in 1990. Throughout the next 12 months, we’ll be inviting our readers to mark this milestone with us in lots of fun and interesting ways.

To get the ball rolling, we’re proud to offer you the chance to win a family holiday to Santa’s Lapland in Finland! See page 16 for details.

In the meantime, we hope you find this issue useful in negotiating the start to the new school and nursery year.

Rebeccca Editor, Families Hampshire North

@Familieshampshire © Families Hampshire North Magazine 2020. Families is a registered trademark of LCMB Ltd, Remenham House, Regatta Place, Marlow Road, Bourne End, Bucks SL8 5TD. The contents of this magazine are fully protected by copyright and none of the editorial or photographic matter may be reproduced in any form without prior consent of Families Print Ltd. Every care is taken in the preparation of this magazine but Families Print Ltd, its distributors, franchisees and LCMB Ltd cannot be held responsible for the claims of advertisers nor for the accuracy of the contents, or any consequences thereof.

In this issue 4.

Local news

6.

Education

10.

Early Years

12.

Parenting

14.

Clubs & Classes

15.

Kids’ Activities

Visit Winchester Science Centre’s brand new visitor experience this autumn From Saturday 17 October, find out how far your curiosity will take you as you embark on an exhilarating adventure around Winchester Science Centre’s brand new visitor experience!

Feel your senses come alive as you explore the sights and sounds of an exciting new interactive exhibition, all themed around sound, hearing and vibration. Put yourself in the action by venturing into an enormous 10m long guitar to feel the string vibrations or climb through a giant ear to explore its inner workings.

Get set for explosive Science LIVE demos taking place right on the exhibition floor! There’ll be fire, ice, explosions and much more, all on a massive scale and taking place regularly throughout the day so you won’t miss a thing.

For something a little more tranquil, the whole family can get creative and have a go at challenges themed around nature in the inside/outside experimentation zone BIO:SPACE – bring a coat so you can go outside whatever the weather! And if it all gets a bit too much, take a break in the Recombobulation Room – a quiet place designed for people who need time away from the hustle and bustle.

While you’re visiting, don’t miss out on all the other exciting things on offer, including out-of-this-world interactive exhibits familiesonline.co.uk

in Explorer:Space and spectacular shows in the UK’s largest standalone Planetarium. And with a free live science show where the team of Inspirers will be delving into the science behind the sounds through fun demos and exciting audience participation, there’ll be something for the whole family to get involved with!

If all that’s left you needing a break, take a seat and relax with a hot drink or mouth-wateringly tasty treat from the refreshed café before continuing your STEM (science, technology, engineering and maths) journey at home with a souvenir from the remodelled shop.

For more information and to book tickets visit; www.winchestersciencecentre.org.

Families Hampshire North 3

News

Supporting children to understand emotions

What Else Am I Feeling?

Defining More Emotions

Having a point of discussion that is not too intrusive for children is a great way to support children with their emotional literacy skills. Books provide a wonderful opportunity to support children in this way.

A world of woodland wonders at Sandy Balls Shrouded in leafy tranquillity, our enchanting New Forest retreat is a world away from your everyday. With large investment over the last couple of years, there’s no better time to discover this woodland hideaway.

With resident alpacas, picturesque cycling routes, indoor and outdoor pools, activity programmes, spectacular entertainment, a serene spa and plenty of luxury accommodation, we’ve got the perfect recipe for adventure, relaxation and fun for all the family.

Be assured that with Away Resorts you can enjoy a COVID-safe getaway.

From the International award-winning author Katie Flanagan, ‘What else am I feeling?’ is the sequel to ‘What am I feeling?’

‘What else am I feeling?’ helps introduce children to the vocabulary linked to the emotions they are likely to experience on a regular basis. It offers valuable insights for adults in helping to expand their child’s knowledge, understanding and vocabulary regarding a wide range of emotions. It provides the opportunity to open up discussions with children about a variety of feelings in a gentle and non-intrusive way.

The forewords for children and adults provide a useful background to help develop understanding of the importance of learning about our emotions and growing our skills to help children become more comfortable with the everyday emotional experiences they encounter.

Through useful questions and suggestions, it also offers ideas and guidance for how best to support children with their emotional experiences. It is a versatile resource; easy for carers, educators and family members to use.

There is also an accompanying journal for children to use to personalise their own experience of the emotions covered in this picture discussion book.

What Else am I Feeling? by local author, Katie Flanagan is available online at www.amazon.co.uk and www.waterstones.com

www.awayresorts.co.uk

Children’s Laureate to remain for further year Cressida Cowell’s time as Children’s Laureate will continue for an additional 12 months due to the coronavirus outbreak.

The Great British Beach Clean is back Become a Citizen Scientist during the annual Great British Beach Clean from 18 to 25 September.

Register to adopt a 100m stretch of beach and organise your own beach clean, with your family, a group of friends or ‘bubble’ in line with government guidance.

The Great British Beach Clean is more than just litter picking - people become citizen scientists and carry out a litter survey, recording what they find on the beaches to help show a national and international picture of the most common forms of litter.

Even if you don’t live near the coast, you can still take part by joining the Source to Sea Litter Quest and spot (and pick up!) common beach litter items in your local area. Did you know that 80% of the litter on beaches around the UK has travelled there from our towns, parks and rivers?

More info: www.mcsuk.org 4 Families Hampshire North

The best-selling author of the How to Train Your Dragon series took the role in July 2019 and had been due to step down next year. However, organisers BookTrust said the “exceptional circumstances” created by the pandemic meant Cressida will serve a three-year term, until June 2022.

The role of Children’s Laureate is awarded once every two years to a leading children’s author or illustrator to honour outstanding achievement in their field and to acknowledge their importance in creating the readers of tomorrow.

Cressida plans to continue with her ambitious campaign to make the magic of books and reading available to everyone by making a library in every school in the UK a compulsory legal requirement. www.childrenslaureate.org.uk

Creation of imaginary worlds more common Children are far more likely to create imaginary worlds than previously believed, according to new research. A University of Oregon study found 17% of children ages 8 to 12 invented imaginary worlds in detail, with many sharing their creations with friends, who added complexity.

While varying widely in content, all imaginary worlds included details about an environment (eg: forests, lakes, caves), the inhabitants (eg: bandits, goblins, animals) and mystical components, such as a fountain that sprayed honey.

The author, Professor Marjorie Taylor says: “We can be really impressed by the creativity of children left to their own devices. It is important to give them some time free of a schedule because they will come up with things that they really enjoy and will share with others.” familiesonline.co.uk

Could this be your dream job?

Business Franchise Opportunity

Work flexible hours from home and around your family!

Families Hampshire North is a premium free magazine for parents with childen 0-12 and is now looking for a new owner.

The Hampshire North franchise area covers Andover, Basingstoke, Bordon, Fleet, Hook and all areas inbetween.

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Families Hampshire North Magazine is part of the brand-leading Families Magazine franchise group, which was established in 1990 and has 40 local titles around the UK. We are also celebrating 30 years this year!

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Call us today for more information on 07789 882467 or email your interest to: editor@familieshampshirenorth.co.uk

WE’RE COMING BACK WITH A BANG! Reopening Saturday 17 October with a brand new visitor experience

A voyage to remember 18 holes of crazy golf, with an adventure around every corner!

Learn more & book now at www.knightsrealm.co.uk Basingstoke Golf Centre, West Ham Leisure Park, Worting Road, Basingstoke RG22 6PG

BOOK BY 30 SEPTEMBER TO SAVE 25% www.winchestersciencecentre.org familiesonline.co.uk

Families Hampshire North 5

Education

Supporting a dyslexic child

By Ellie Malt “Do you think she might have dyslexia or something like that?” I asked.

I was standing in the playground with one of the teaching assistants, watching my 4 year old climb into her buggy, eager for her after-school snack. Although it was only her second term in Reception, I’d noticed she seemed uninterested in the alphabet, while other children could already write their names.

But I was only really thinking out loud. Even to me, it seemed ridiculously early to be jumping to any conclusions.

“Probably” she shot back over the general hubbub.

I admit, I was shocked. But looking back years later, finally in possession of a formal diagnosis, I appreciate her honesty. I only wish I had acted sooner; it could have saved so much struggle and frustration.

In the following years, when I picked my daughter up from playdates, I would see the books being read by her friends.

They were usually far in advance of anything we were struggling through at home. Bedtime reading had become a frustrating experience. Spelling tests were dreaded.

I turned to friends who were teachers for advice. “Each child learns at their own pace” they said. I clung to that mantra for a couple more years, until the issues became too difficult to ignore. Plucking up courage, I approached her teacher and suggested investigating dyslexia. Her reply was discouraging: “Do you really want to label your child?

In any case, there is no official diagnosis possible until she is seven.”

psychologist for a proper assessment.” Six months and several hundred pounds later we had the official diagnosis.

While it was a relief, it was also the beginning of a new and difficult stage in the dyslexia journey as we struggled to work out what to do next.

According to the Richmond Dyslexia Association: “Neuroscience has made lots of very recent discoveries about the learning brain and what a dyslexic brain looks like.” Crucially, there may be several reasons why the connections between the sounds and the shapes of the alphabet don’t establish themselves firmly in some children in the early years. An excellent strategy for parents is to find out which reasons apply specifically to their child.

“Dyslexia is on a spectrum so is it an umbrella term for a wide range of strengths and difficulties? It is becoming much less common for it to be given a single diagnosis” reports Sophie Camillieri, Chair of Richmond Dyslexia Association.

Many of the explanations for why an intelligent child finds it difficult to learn to read or write begin with the two main ways we absorb language from the world around us: our eyes and ears. Good words to google here are “sensory processing.”

By my daughter’s eighth birthday, her loss of confidence was dramatic and she was falling even further behind at school. To me, it seemed obvious there was a problem. But still I had to push her school into running a screening test.

For some children, discriminating between different sounds is problematic. For others, a barrier to learning might be found in the visual pathway. As a starting point in establishing which of these issues apply to your child, you could seek an assessment from a Behavioural Optometrist, Auditory Consultant or Speech and Language Therapist.

Dyslexia also overlaps with other conditions that could be affecting your child’s sensory input, such as hyper-mobility and ADD or ADHD. Learning more about these could help you to eliminate them or find therapies that will remove as many barriers to your child’s learning as possible.

The Head of Learning Support called us in. “I think she has dyslexia” she said. “You should see an educational

It’s also widely accepted that memory is a key part of the dyslexia puzzle. If a child is absorbing sounds and symbols

6 Families Hampshire North

familiesonline.co.uk

Education differently, it’s unsurprising that the brain learns to handle and store that data differently. Educational Psychologists talk about “working memory.” Neurologists refer to the “semantic memory.” This is where many of the various approaches to dyslexia learning support come into play because, by triggering all five senses, they rely on the episodic memory instead of the traditional “working” or “semantic” memory.

Sources of help It’s really helpful to look for organisations that provide support in your local area.

Here are some good national sources, some with links to local support.

When it comes to reading, some learning support methods focus on breaking words down into chunks, combined with repetition. Others are more about enjoying reading.

According to Dyslexia Author, Dr Gavin Reid: “Studies have shown that releasing children from the burden of decoding can facilitate or enhance comprehension.” A child with dyslexia will learn differently, you just have to work out what works for them.

British Dyslexia Association (www.bdadyslexia.org.uk) offers advice, assessments and a free helpline. It also helps you find your local dyslexia association (www.bdadyslexia. org.uk/contact/find-a-local-dyslexia-association)

While no one wants to reduce their child to a label, the official diagnosis of dyslexia for my daughter gave me the confidence to start looking for answers and to begin finding the help we needed.

Dyslexia Assist (www.dyslexia-assist.org.uk/supportnear-you) provides information about where to find local support.

Teachers are still given almost no training in how to recognise dyslexia and how to help a child. So the support your child receives will very much depend on your ability to support them.

There is no one central place to go for help and no single answer that works for all. But the more I have learned, the more I have been able to help. And while she may always have “the label,” she is now an 11 year old, with a reading age of a 14 year old! An achievement that seemed unthinkable a few years ago.

Ellie Malt is a writer. She lives in Surrey and has two primary school age daughters.

Dyslexia features Your child may: •

Talk well but write surprisingly little;

•

Be a slow or reluctant reader;

•

Have difficulties with spelling and/or writing;

•

Not always remember or understand what he/she has just read;

•

Seem inattentive and unable to concentrate or remember instructions;

•

Have difficulty organising himself/herself;

•

Find it hard to remember the order of things, such as the days of the week;

•

Have difficulty copying from the blackboard;

•

Feel discouraged and at times causes trouble.

The Dyslexia Association (www.dyslexia.uk.net) offers screening, assessment, tuition, assistive technology training and a free helpline.

Achieve Now (www.achievenow.org.uk) works with pupils with dyslexia and IT. It has great resources on its website and provides all services and consultations online.

IPSEA (www.ipsea.org.uk/Pages/Category/serviceoverview) is an Independent Provider of Special Education Advice that offers free and independent legally based information, advice and support to help get the right education for children and young people with all kinds of special educational needs and disabilities (SEND).

Helen Arkell Dyslexia Centre (www.helenarkell.org.uk) is regional (based in Surrey) but is considered significant in terms of influence.

Opportunity

Nurture

Growth

Come and visit our family school

Getting a diagnosis Getting a full report from an Educational Psychologist is a lengthy and expensive process. Sometimes reports are required by schools before they will provide extra learning support, or extra time in exams. But they are not always necessary and schools don’t have to act on them. Learning technology consultant, Caroline Batemen, recommends parents check with their child’s school first as to what difference a full report will make. Cheaper and quicker alternatives include a level seven qualified assessor or an online screening test such as Nessy’s at www.nessy.com/ uk/product/dyslexia-screening familiesonline.co.uk

Open Morning

Saturday 7th November 10.00am tanja@yateleymanor.com

Yateley Manor

01252 405500 www.yateleymanor.com Families Hampshire North 7

Education

Coping with back to school stress Starting a new school year after Covid-19 may mean both parents and children feel more anxious than usual. So how can we help our children go back to school feeling more happy and relaxed? Claire Winter speaks to some experts.

Consultant Clinical Psychologist, Dr Sarah Mundy from www. parentingthroughstories.com says it’s vital that we support our children to make sense of what we are calling the ‘new normal.’

She cautions against dismissing our kids’ emotions: “We need to support children to make sense of their feelings and the changes that the pandemic has caused. We need to normalise anxiety rather than dismiss it and help them (and parents and teachers) find ways of coping. Emotions are contagious so the more the adults and systems around children can model that they can cope, despite the uncertainty, the better.”

Evidence Based Parenting and Education expert, Dr Kathy Weston (www.drkathyweston.com) advises being positive about returning to school. If your child is worried remind them of: The safety measures that the school has implemented; The things that can be controlled versus the things that can’t; The innovation in healthcare science that is helping us move towards eventual normality.

Other tips from Kathy include: Provide a positive home learning environment; Use effective praise to motivate your child; Remember to be organised during the first few weeks of term; Ensure your child gets enough sleep!

Education specialist and author of ‘100 Things to Learn Before you are 10’ Gail Hugman (www.lessonsalive.com) says it’s important to check in with your child regularly. “Have a chat with them about how they are adapting to the new school routine and friendships. Is everyone glad to be back? Is there anything they like better? Is there anything they miss? Are they worried about anything? Is there anything they need to catch up on?”

In terms of school work, remind your child what was achieved during lockdown. “Actively talk to them about the progress they made (include maturity, self-control, confidence, new skills learned.) Remind them that the teacher also went through lockdown and isn’t expecting them to be perfect, just polite and well behaved!”

Finally, she suggests keeping a free evening each week for a ‘no expectations, no pressure’ night. “Films, games, popcorn - cosy things to relax the system and chill out!”

If you are worried, reach out to your child’s school. Remember though that learning how to cope with uncertainty will help build your child’s ability to cope with change in later life.

How to keep your kids stress free Natalie Costa, Confidence Coach for children and founder of Power Thoughts (www.powerthoughts.co.uk) shares her tips.

Books to help with anxiety Recommendations from Dr Sarah Mundy, Consultant Clinical Psychologist from www.parentingthroughstories.com Coronavirus: A Book for Children about Covid-19 by Elizabeth Jenner, suitable for all ages. Illustrated by Axel Scheffler, this accessible book provides clear explanations about Covid-19 and its impact on health and family life.

Please Stay Here - I Want You Near is Dr Sarah Mundy’s first interactive book in the Bartley Bear series. It helps children ages 2 to 4 make sense of their feelings and cope with spending time away from their parents.

The Goodnight Caterpillar by Lori Lite is an encouraging story for ages 4 to 9. The caterpillar teaches the child how to relax, unwind, and see things more clearly so he/she can fall asleep peacefully.

The Huge Bag of Worries by agony aunt Virginia Ironside is a brilliant book for ages 2 to 5. Worry follows Jenny in a big blue bag. Can Jenny get help to get rid of the worry?

8 Families Hampshire North

Allow space to talk Listen to your child’s worries and validate their feelings. It may be tempting to try to reassure by telling them not to worry. However, more helpful may be: “It’s ok to feel upset about this. Shall we look at what we can do to help you feel more prepared?”

For those less inclined to talk, encourage drawing/writing what’s on their mind. Creating a ‘worry character’ with a silly name and voice can help children recognise that they are not their worries.

Remind them of their strengths Remind children of previous challenges they have faced. Create a poster about these. What did they learn and how did they grow from these challenges?

Your child could also write themselves a letter reminding them that they are brave and can do difficult things. Encourage them to include the new and fun experiences that await them too.

They can refer to this whenever they feel anxious about changes ahead.

familiesonline.co.uk

Education

Five “must-do’s” when choosing a school for your child

By Judith Judd When my daughter was four, she came with us to visit several primary schools. Afterwards, we asked which she liked best.

“The one with the shoe shop” she said. As it happened, we also liked the one with the (pretend) shoe shop and so that is the school we chose.

Maybe it doesn’t always make sense to take a 4 year old’s advice when choosing a school but it’s always important to put your child at the centre of the process. Parents know better than anyone how different individual children can be.

The first rule for choosing a school is to ignore the label.

Research about different types of schools – academies, specialist, free, grammar - reveals that the type of school doesn’t guarantee the level of the education.

The second is to visit the school. When you do, check out the relationship between children and teachers. Do teachers pay attention to what the children are saying? Do they respect them?

You want your child to be happy at school and the relationship with teachers matters.

Find out what progress pupils make during the time they arrive at school and by the time they leave. Schools’ exam results at GCSE and in national tests at age 11 give an idea of the sort of children who attend the school but they don’t indicate progress. You can get an idea how good a school’s teaching is by looking at progress measures available on government websites for that school.

Look at the Ofsted report. Inspectors give ratings: outstanding, good, requires improvement, inadequate. But equally important is their assessment of how different groups of children fare.

A school may do well with able children but not those who struggle and vice versa. The reports also give an idea of a school’s strengths and weaknesses. That’s particularly important for older children who may have particular talents and interests.

Talk to the Head Teacher. Leadership is crucial to a school’s success. It’s important that you have confidence in the Head and that she/he impresses you with their engagement with staff and pupils.

Whilst choosing a school feels like a daunting process, bear in mind also that research shows that whilst schools and teachers are important in helping children thrive, parents’ support at home matters more.

Judith Judd is co-author, with Wendy Berliner, of the book How to Succeed at School: Separating Fact from Fiction: What Every Parent Should Know. Published by Routledge and available from Amazon and good book stores.

Discover more about Yateley Manor School

A word about grammar schools Concerned that there are no grammar schools in your area?

This may not be something you need to worry about.

A big study from Durham University suggests that bright children do just as well in non-selective schools as grammar schools. Professor Stephen Gorard says: “Dividing children into the most able and the rest does not appear to lead to better results for either group.” He says that there is no evidence that a particular type of school leads to better attainment.

However, he adds that parents may choose grammar schools for the reason that they tend to cream off the more advantaged pupils in an area so that the neighbouring schools have to cope with a disproportionate number of disadvantaged and more challenging children. familiesonline.co.uk

The key to a successful education is twofold. Firstly create an environment where children feel safe: a warm, friendly school where there is much laughter, where adults care about individuals. Secondly, success comes from a wellplanned and effective transition programme to ensure children and families understand each step of the journey ahead. There should be no surprises when moving to a new school.

A happy child will be a successful child. A good quality education should develop the whole child. By really getting to know children, understanding their passions and strengths, appreciating their barriers to learning and taking steps to remove them, Yateley Manor are able to open their eyes and minds to a bright future. The foundation to their lives will be a safe, friendly, warm environment where they will be supported every step along their journey. A Yateley Manor journey.

To arrange a visit email: tanja@yateleymanor.com, call 01252 405500 or come along to their Open Morning on Saturday 7th November at 10am. www.yateleymanor.com Families Hampshire North 9

Early Years

Clever ways to get your child eating healthily

By Gabrielle Nash Do mealtimes fill you with dread? Does your child have little interest in broccoli and beans? Encouraging their children to eat healthily is a dilemma many parents face. Whether you’re trying baby-led weaning or desperate to get vegetables into a pre-schooler, we’ve got some top tips on how to give their children the best start at the dinner table.

DO get your child involved. Can you offer them a choice of 2 or 3 healthy options? Even if they can’t chop the vegetables, can they wash them? Psychologists suggest giving a child an element of control will help them engage with mealtimes.

DON’T allow snacks 1 to 2 hours before mealtimes. If they come to the table hungry, they’re more likely to eat and even try something new. Sticking to similar times for snacks and meals will also help.

DON’T offer alternatives. Or if you have more than one child, don’t make separate meals. If a child comes to expect yoghurt, toast or cereal when they don’t eat, they will soon learn to refuse even favourite meals.

DO have a family meal. Often bad behaviour at the dinner table stems from wanting attention. Even if you don’t eat, can you sit with your little one and talk to them about their food?

DO encourage and praise; stress does not encourage a child to eat. Show them how you enjoy YOUR food. Don’t try “they’re good for you” when commenting on e.g. green beans. Use statements like “these are so juicy” “eating lots of food gives me lots of energy for playing with you.”

DON’T insist on clean plates, especially if you bribe them to finish. Children are good at regulating their appetites and always insisting on finishing food or offering a bribe can lead to problems later in life. Remember: it’s the parent’s job to provide, the child’s job to decide.

DO model good eating behaviour. Your own anxiety towards food can contribute to poor eating in children. Think about how you approach and talk about food.

Lastly, remember, you’re in charge of what food is in the kitchen.

If you buy healthier options, your children will grow up with a healthy and varied approach to food. So eat varied, fresh food and eat it with pleasure.

Follow Gaby @thelondonishmum

More healthy eating tips Dr Pandora Giles from the University of East London works with parents and children. Here are her ideas for encouraging young children to eat healthily.

•

Make meal times fun. Chat, sing and talk about the food. What colour is it? Where do potatoes come from? Playing and laughing works better than stern instruction.

•

Encourage food play. Make a face out of fruit or a forest with broccoli! Desensitizing children to tastes and textures makes them more likely to try new foods.

•

When introducing new foods, offer them alongside a favourite.

•

If your child is eating little but drinking a lot of e.g. milk or juice, consider cutting back. Only offer water in between meals.

•

Have clear mealtimes that last around 20 minutes.

Longer than that it can get stressful or boring!

•

Eat with your child when possible and offer encouragement.

•

It’s never too early or too late to start. Even if you’re still pregnant or breastfeeding, try to get a good varied diet.

With older children, tastes change so it’s never too late to introduce some variety.

10 Families Hampshire North

Playtime with Dad Children whose fathers make time to play with them from a very young age may find it easier to control their behaviour and emotions as they grow up, according to new research.

The study carried out by Cambridge University and the LEGO Foundation looked at how mothers and fathers play with children ages 0 to 3 and how it affects child development.

Although there are similarities, it found that fathers tend to engage in more physical play like tickling, chasing, and piggyback rides, which researchers claim appears to help children to learn to control their feelings.

Professor Ramchandani, one of the authors of the study, said: “Physical play creates fun, exciting situations in which children have to apply self-regulation. You might have to control your strength, learn when things have gone too far – or maybe your father steps on your toe by accident and you feel cross.” www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/abs/pii/ S0273229720300307 familiesonline.co.uk

Early Years

The fun goes on at Jubilee Day Nursery Plenty of smiles, laughter and fun has been had by the staff and children at Jubilee Day Nursery this Summer, all whilst adhering to strict COVID-19 guidelines.

Reception testing delayed to 2021 The government’s plan to introduce Reception Baseline Assessment (RBA) will be delayed until September 2021 because of the disruption caused by the coronavirus pandemic.

In September 2017, the Department for Education announced that a new start-of-school assessment for children ages 4 and 5 would be introduced as a baseline measure to track progress during primary school.

The test is due to eventually replace key stage 1 SATs in providing the baseline on which pupil progress scores are based. The new tests have been criticised by some teachers, Head Teachers and parents, who claim it is unnecessary, will cause distress and could damage children’s future learning. www.gov.uk/guidance/reception-baseline-assessment

The nursery continued to celebrate many special events including; VE day, sports days, graduation ceremonies and the arrival of new animals on its farm.

Parents have been involved in all of the events – proudly watching on as their little ones compete in their end of term sports day races and graduate in their caps and gowns, all whilst adhering to social distancing guidelines.

During the lockdown period, Jubilee Day Nursery remained open for children of key/critical workers. The nursery reopened to all children on 1st June, with children grouped in bubbles.

The nursery has a highly regarded reputation for outdoor learning. Located in Padworth, Berkshire, it has over 60 acres of private woodland, with a working farm, and provides childcare for children aged 3 months to 5 years of age.

Visit www.jubileegemms.co.uk to find out more or to arrange a visit.

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‘Why fit in when you were born to stand out?’

Jubilee Gems is a small and friendly, term time nursery set in rural West Berkshire with a passion for outdoor learning and play.

Audiobooks improve literacy

Audiobooks can benefit children’s reading skills, according to new research published by the charity, the National Literacy Trust.

The report looks at the advantages of listening to a recording of a novel being read, and the impact on young readers.

The research suggests that listening to a recorded story requires the same mental skills as reading in print, so audiobooks can help with understanding words and remembering information. They can also give children access to a broader range of texts and engage readers who might be reluctant, struggling or developing.

Emily Best, from the National Literacy Trust, said: “Audiobooks can be the key to unlocking a child’s love of reading. They enable children of all reading abilities and interests to access and explore the incredible world of stories, which are brought to life by a range of exciting voices, different accents and sound effects.” www.literacytrust.org.uk familiesonline.co.uk

• For babies & children aged 3 months to 5 years old • Set in 60 acres of farmland and woodland • Experts in Forest School learning • Freshly prepared food • Funding available “When you have that daily ‘Mum guilt’ about going off to work it’s outweighed knowing how cared for they are at Jubilee. The staff are creative, caring and go above and beyond on a daily basis.” - Parent review on daynurseries.co.uk - 2020 For more information, to arrange a visit or order a prospectus visit:

www.jubileegems.co.uk School Road, Padworth, RG7 4JA|0118 983 4018|info@jubileegems.co.uk

Families Hampshire North 11

Parenting

Who will take care of the children IF….?

Why every parent needs a Will

By Andrew Campbell Deciding who will take care of your children if the worst happens is a tough one. If one parent dies, then the other parent automatically takes over parenting responsibilities.

However, if both parents are no longer around the situation is not straightforward for your children.

Some parents think that by appointing godparents they have taken care of this eventuality. However, a godparent is not a legal guardian and has no legal rights. If both parents were to die, godparents would not automatically assume legal responsibility for the children.

So you need a legal will which appoints a guardian. If you don’t appoint a legal guardian, you don’t get a say in who would take care of your children. The state will step in and appoint a guardian based on its view of what is best them. This risks exposing children to court battles, family disputes and potentially even foster care.

So how do you choose the right guardian?

In many instances this is not a clear-cut decision.

Parents often choose their own parents – their children’s grandparents. But you need to have regard for the age of grandparents. Would they be able to care for your children in 10 years’ time when they have grown into teenagers?

Sometimes parents look to one of their siblings – an aunt or uncle to the children. But what if there are multiple siblings on both sides – how do you choose?

It’s sensible to discuss with a sibling whether they would want the responsibly of raising your children. Being a parent isn’t for everyone. Also, do they already have their own children? Would you be comfortable with your child being raised in the same way? Would your sibling be able to cope with more children in the family?

There are practical considerations too, such as the geographical location of the proposed guardian. Consider the upheaval that could be caused if your child has to relocate, move school and make friends at a time when they have lost both of their parents.

Nobody feels good about the idea of their child facing the world

without parents so it’s totally normal to feel that whatever decision you make about a guardian, it’s going to feel less than perfect. In the end, what’s important is that you appoint someone who would have your child’s best interests at heart.

What’s MOST important is that you don’t ignore the issue.

No one knows what life has in store so it’s important to plan for the unexpected. Parents spend most of their lives trying to protect their children so try to think of making a will and appointing a guardian as just a way of protecting them legally.

Visit www.childlawadvice.org.uk for more information.

6 top tips for making a perfect will Make the time to write a will: it’s estimated that one in three people die without having made a will, which can cause problems and financial worry for their loved ones.

A will is for everyone: if you die without one, the intestacy rules determine who inherits what and your loved ones could miss out.

Use a professional: choose who draws up your will wisely.

Seek professional legal advice and use a qualified and regulated solicitor covered by the Solicitors Regulation Authority.

Helping you and your family find the right way forward www.phillips-law.co.uk 01256 460830 legal@phillips-law.co.uk Phillips Solicitors Ltd, Town Gate, 38 London Street, Basingstoke, Hampshire, RG21 7NY 12 Families Hampshire North

Choose your executors well: executors are responsible for exercising your estate in accordance with your instructions after you have died. Choose them carefully! It can be a demanding task and you should always ask people if they mind taking on this role.

Appoint guardians – see above!

Decide who you want to get what and when: planning who will inherit what and when, where children are concerned, helps prevent the many family feuds that follow a person’s death. familiesonline.co.uk

Parenting

What we can learn from Scandinavian parenting

By Cecilia Chrapkowska Whilst working with an Australian editorial team recently, it struck me that pregnancy, birth, infancy and parenthood are commonly human concepts, experienced whether you live in the UK or the other side of the world. However, what differs around the globe and has an enormous impact on the experience of being a parent is the organisation of support given by society to families. Raising the next generation of humans is a very demanding task, so supporting parents in this is vital to the healthy evolution of a country. And this is where I believe the Swedish parenting experience is worth sharing.

In most countries, Sweden included, parental support started as maternal support. In the 1950s when the Swedish economy was growing rapidly, several reforms were introduced with the aim of strengthening women’s ability to combine motherhood and working. Employers were no longer allowed to fire a woman when she was pregnant or taking care of her child. In 1954 a paid maternity leave of ninety days was introduced.

In 1974, the maternity insurance was replaced by a parental insurance, which granted 6 months of paid parental leave with a payment at 90% of a parent’s salary. This could be shared between the parents of a child as they wished, but the Swedish government clearly intended for fathers and mothers to share it equally.

Twenty years later, fathers only took 9% of the parental leave. To increase that share, one month of the 15 months of paid parental leave was made non-transferable between the parents. In 2002 those non-transferable months, often called “daddy’s months”

New divorce laws good for children New divorce laws, expected to commence in autumn 2021, will help reduce family conflict and be beneficial for children, according to the government.

Divorcing couples will no longer have to “blame” each other for the breakdown of their marriage. Current divorce laws require one spouse to provide evidence of ‘unreasonable behaviour’ even where a couple has made a mutual decision to part ways.

A new law will enable couples to divorce without making accusations of bad behaviour, by giving notice that a marriage has broken down irretrievably.

Justice Secretary David Gauke said: “Hostility and conflict between parents leave their mark on children and can damage their life chances.”

The relationship charity Relate believes the current faultbased system often results in increased animosity, making it harder for ex-partners to develop positive relationships as co-parents. www.gov.uk/government/news/new-divorce-law-to-endthe-blame-game familiesonline.co.uk

became two. In 2019, Swedish dads took 30% of the parental leave, which is the all-time high.

This has been a success not only for Swedish mothers and their careers, but also for Swedish fathers’ relationship with their children and their overall quality of life. A study published in 2007 compared fathers who took parental leave in the late 1970s with men who chose to not do so. In the study, the researchers found that men who took parental leave had a lower risk of premature death than those who turned the option down. This result remained after controlling for possible confounding factors such as educational status, country of birth, and income.

The study doesn’t tell us why. Maybe they created closer relationships with their children and grandchildren that gave them a greater sense of meaning and increased their ability to hold onto their lust for life into the autumn of their years?

In January 2012, the possibility for both parents to go on paid parental leave together was extended from two to six weeks following a baby’s birth. A research group used this natural experiment to look for health outcomes in mothers. They found that following this reform, Swedish mothers were 13% less likely to have an antibiotic treatment and 26% less likely to use anxiolytic medication in the first months after childbirth. The first weeks after childbirth are unlike anything else – to be able to share this period is obviously not only good for bonding and parental relations, it even protects against disease.

Apart from a generous, shared parental leave, the second particularly successful part of Swedish society’s support for parenting is its daycare provision. In Sweden, all municipalities need to ensure high-quality daycare to all children above one year of age. The daycare is also very affordable, with an incomebased fee, going from zero for parents with the lowest incomes to £117 a month for those with the highest incomes. That is for a first child. For siblings, it’s even less. Virtually all children go to pre-school and most of them love it. As do most parents. It’s easier to be a good-enough parent when you have some time to talk with adults during the day and it’s great to look forward to seeing your little one when they greet you with a large muddy hug when you pick them up from pre-school.

Cecilia Chrapkowska is a parent, paediatrician, writer and co-author of Parenthood the Swedish Way - a science-based guide to infancy, birth and pregnancy, a book about sciencebased parenting available from Amazon and good book stores.

Families Hampshire North 13

Clubs & Classes

Out of school, not out of action

By Andrew Campbell As children move through primary school, the number meeting the recommended amount of physical activity for healthy development and weight drops by an astounding 40%.

This poses parents with a challenge. How to find their children physical activities they enjoy, feel successful doing and, crucially right now, are available in a safe, socially distanced way? Bear in mind, that whilst government guidance on social distancing allows for certain sports activities to be pursued, there is likely to be limited availability in many areas.

Here’s our checklist of out of school sports that can currently be pursued: Badminton A great way to get into racket sports, badminton helps develop coordination, agility and balance. It can be played indoors over winter. Visit www.badmintonengland.co.uk Cycling Cycling is part of growing up. It gives children independence and keeps them fit too. Local cycling clubs offer expert coaching, some amazing cycling facilities as well as an opportunity to make cycling buddies. Visit www.britishcycling.org.uk Dancing Dance is a way for kids to express their creativity, imagination and emotions. Dancing can also increase your child’s flexibility, range of motion, physical strength and stamina, as well as provide vital exercise.

Football As well as being the most popular sport in the world, football is one of the most well-rounded sports developing a host of physical and cognitive skills. Visit www.thefa.com Gymnastics A demanding sport that requires perseverance and discipline.

It develops strength, speed, power, coordination, flexibility and balance. The sense of accomplishment gained from mastering complex physical feats helps children face and overcome their fears. Visit www.british-gymnastics.org/discover Swimming If your child has shown an aptitude for swimming during lessons, they may enjoy the thrill of competitive swimming in a local club.

Bear in mind pools are re-opening slowly; some may not re-open this year. To find a local club, visit www.swimming.org Tennis Tennis helps children develop valuable life skills like respect, fairplay and concentration. It can be played all year round and into adulthood. Visit www.lta.org.uk which build confidence, boost concentration, develop communication and help coordination. We have left no stone unturned when it comes to health and safety but the children will be having so much fun that they will barely notice a difference. Whilst there won’t be hand-holding games this term, there will be lots of eye contact, funky moves, fantastic diction and learning about how to be a great friend.

Perform runs drama classes for 4-7s and 7-12s as well as Perform At Home, popular online classes. Book a FREE noobligation class by visiting www.perform.org.uk/try

Perform returns with Covid safe confidence building fun Families talks to Perform’s Principal, Lucy Quick.

We’ve always put children at the heart of everything we do and we’re thrilled to be back in real life with classes filled with laughter, fun and confidence-boosting activities.

We’ve put enormous effort into adapting our class content to ensure that we follow the latest government health guidelines whilst making sure the children can still sing, dance, act and have the best fun of the week.

To help children get back to enjoying the things they love most, our autumn term is packed with games and activities

14 Families Hampshire North

Local Perform classes available in North Hampshire Perform weekly drama, dance and singing classes are available in North Hampshire at:

Quote HW141120 an introdu for cto £40 disco ry unt.

Book by 14 November

Clift Meadown Pavillion, Bramley, RG26 5BH (Drama 4-7’s, Fri 4pm & 5pm).

Zebon Community Centre, Fleet, GU52 0ZE (Drama 4-7’s, Mon 4pm & 5pm, Tues 4pm. Drama 7-12’s, Mon 5pm & Tues 5pm).

Hatch Warren Community Centre, Basingstoke, RG22 4YF (Drama 4-7’s, Tues 4pm & 5pm). www.perform.org.uk/try familiesonline.co.uk

Activities

PICTURE CROSSWORD Can you solve the picture clues and put them in the crossword?

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WOODLAND MAZE

AUTUMN DAYS

Find these Autumn words in the grid. Then read the unused letters on lines 7 to 10 from left to right to find a hidden message!

Z N T R Q K G Y R T H P

H C M V P U M P K I N W

A H I P W S E O M E M T

PUMPKIN HARVEST ACORN

familiesonline.co.uk

R V S Q U I R R E L S H

V P T A C J T W C H C S

E O A T F N O U H E O B

S N E R M L O R A S B F

T D G O L D E N Y S W J

P F W A I Z U W L O E U

S Z H S C H I L L O B K

B P R P I V T A O N A P

A P P L E D A C O R N N

Little Owl has got lost in the woods.

Can you help him get home by drawing a path to his tree?

COBWEB HAY CHILL SQUIRREL HALLOWEEN MIST APPLE Families Hampshire North 15

Kids Activities

Win a magical break to Santa's Lapland in 2021 Enjoy a Reindeer sleigh ride, sledging with huskies, exploring a real igloo and much more, including a once in a lifetime private visit with Santa himself!

To enter, visit SantasLapland.com/families by 30th October 2020.

Terms & conditions apply, please see website for details.

Get away

this October half term… perfect for all the family!

• On-site restaurant and pub • Live streamed entertainment • Halloween themed activity programmes for all ages • Meet our alpacas!

• Outstanding accommodation options • Fantastic woodland walks or hire bikes and explore the local area

To book, visit awayresorts.co.uk and quote

FAMO20 or call 03334 553 723 SandyBallsAwayResorts

16 Families Hampshire North

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AwayResortsHolidays

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familiesonline.co.uk