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SINGAPORE ISSUE 5 FEBRUARY 2014
PUBLISHED BY COGENT MEDIA
MCI (P) 114/08/2013
The truth about racism in children The answer to Singapore’s population woes: Egg freezing? Your outlook for the Year of the Horse is on page 22 Audi Fashion Festival founder Tjin Lee champions Singapore mummies! Lim Seng, the man to lead Singapore into space
Family And All That Jazz Eu Yan Sang’s RICHARD EU on family, future and the uselessness (yes, uselessness!) of money
Contents SNIPPETS 4
Hard Truths
4
Choice Products, Interesting News and More!
of the most pivotal events ot too long ago, in Little India, one a riot that broke out after e in Singapore’s history took plac enger. While the riot pass a and a fatal accident between a bus inued unabated in cont fires the s, hour was quelled within a few aim at the rioters and each the online sphere, as netizens took ately, many racist remarks other with their keyboards. Unfortun tion: is racism learned or is it were thrown, which begets the ques at this issue on page 17. look already innate? We take a closer
N
COVERSTORY 6
When Jazz Meets Chinese Herbs CEO of Eu Yan Sang Richard Eu on
family, future and money
8
8 #rebel #entrepreneur
Audi Fashion Festival, Tjin Lee
He wants to put a Singaporean into space and he ain’t giving up
FOCUS
CEO of Eu Yan Sang derful opportunity to speak to the On a lighter note, we had the won ion, gleaned from a pass and ey mon ly, fami of wisdom on Richard Eu, who gave us nuggets in droves. The brain ion is also a quality Lim Seng has lifetime of experience (page 6). Pass 10). e aporean into space by 2014 (pag behind IN.Genius wants to put a Sing
#mother A look at the woman behind the
Fashion Festival have a chat with the Director of Audi But, let us not forget the ladies. We mommy of s pion cham d cate dedi ie Yeo (page 12), Tjin Lee (page 8) and actress Jam businesses and mom-preneurs.
10 Meet Singapore’s Tony Stark
12 Tammy Is All Grown Up
your child’s est, such as determining whether We also tackle a few issues of inter egg freezing tive elec (page 14) and discuss whether intelligence is based on genetics And if you are 21). e (pag woes n declining populatio could be the answer to Singapore’s store for all of us in s hold e Hors the of what the Year the fortune-telling sort, we highlight
Actress and mom-preneur Jamie Yeo has big plans
14
(page 22)!
NURTURE
est that you would like azine with us or any topics of inter Share your thoughts about the mag .sg or leave your dlife lyan fami us an e-mail at editorial@ us to consider covering. Just drop ag. m/familyandlifem comments on our Facebook at fb.co
14 Work Hard, Get Smart?:
The Fallacy of Intelligence
The myth that your child’s intelligence is dependent on your genes is severely outdated
joyous and Happy reading and wishing you a
prosperous Year of the Horse!
16 Stop Hovering! 3 Signs That
You Are A Helicopter Parent
Managing Editor Gerald Woon
There is a fine line between looking out for your children and stifling their development
17 Are We Born Racist?
New research reveals a few surprising findings about the roots of racism in children
HEALTH
18 It’s The Eye Of The Tiger!
You can still exercise even when you are pregnant with the following exercises
MANAGING EDITOR EDITORIAL
To beat female hair loss, we first need to understand how hair grows
CREATIVE
Is egg freezing the answer to Singapore’s population woes?
20 Post-Natal Tress Distress
16 RELAX
22 The Overall 2014 Outlook
We look into our crystal ball, interpret the tea leaves, and reveal your fortunes for the Year of the Horse
21 Frozen In Time
25
Ditch the passe Valentine’s Day restaurant dinner and stay at home
29 What’s Happening
2
An emergency in a foreign land
Family & Life • Feb 2014
Sales Coordinator| Michelle Lee sales@cogentmedia.sg Chef Tim Meijers Fiona Walker Ken Koh Jade Tan Maureen Beth Schuster Manager | Jessica Ong jessica@cogentmedia.sg
All materials printed within Family & Life are Copyright 2013 © and protected under the Copyright Act. All rights reserved 2013.
EVENTS
30 My 2 Cents On...
Senior Marketing Executive| Emily Choo emily@cogentmedia.sg
Distributed by MediaWheel Singapore 31 Toh Guan Road East #07-01 LW Technocentre, Singapore 608608 Tel: +65 6560 5272 Fax: +65 6560 4090
Prawns Fine dining brought home
OP-ED
Designer | Zach zach@cogentmedia.sg
Colour Separation & Printed by Times Printers Private Limited 16 Tuas Avenue 5, Singapore 639340 Tel: +65 6311 2888 Fax: +65 6311 2801 Licence No. L021/09/2012
28 Tomato Gazpacho & White
A list of upcoming family events
CONTRIBUTORS
Writer | Farhan Shah farhan@cogentmedia.sg
MCI (P) 114/08/2013
Fresh value and even fresher produce, just don’t tell anyone
BITES
Gerald Woon gerald@cogentmedia.sg
CONTACT US Editorial Enquiries editorial@familyandlife.sg Advertising Enquiries Tel: +65 6704 9279 Email: sales@cogentmedia.sg
26 Singapore’s Best Kept Secret
SALES & MARKETING
ADMINISTRATION & FINANCE
25 Cooking Up A Love Storm
familyandlife.sg
26
Family & Life is published monthly by Cogent Media Pte. Ltd. 100 Beach Road #32-01 Shaw Tower, Singapore 189702 Tel: +65 6704 9266 Fax: +65 6396 3045 Registration No: 201231255H No material of this publication can be reproduced in any form or means – graphic, electronic, mechanic, photocopying, recording, videotaping, etc. – whether in part or in whole, without the written consent of the Publisher. Family & Life will not be held responsible for any infringements of Copyright material in articles submitted by contributors. While every reasonable care has been taken in the compilation of information contained in this publication, the Publisher, editors or their employees and agents shall not be liable for any errors, inaccuracies, and/or omissions howsoever caused. All views expressed in all articles are solely those of the authors, and are not necessarily those of the Publisher and editor. Family & Life reserves the right to refuse any advertisement or advertorial for any reason and are not liable for claims made by advertisers. The information provided in this publication is solely for reference only. Readers are advised to seek the professional advice from the appropriate advisors, professional or institution for advice and instruction with regard to their personal health issues.
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Feb 2014 • Family & Life
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SNIPPETS A list of choice products, PEACE OF MIND, ALL THE TIME interesting news and cool Keep a close watch on your newborn, whether you’re the kitchen or in Kazakhstan, with the new DCSdevelopments, handpicked in 825L mydlink Cloud Wireless Baby Camera from one by the Family & Life team of the world’s most trusted names in IT solutions, that will interest parents D-Link. Taking three years to perfect, this new baby camera is portable, versatile and easy to use – and families! just how we like our baby monitors.
What makes this new offering from D-Link stand out from the other baby cameras in the market is its motion, sound and temperature sensors, night vision capabilities, and incredibly easy interface. All you need to do is to download the free app from the Apple or
Google app store, install the camera in your desired location and link the app to the camera. Voila! 24/7 uninterrupted monitoring and instant temperature, noise and movement notifications, as long as you have an Internet connection on your digital smartphone or tablet. The baby camera also comes with five pre-set lullabies and two-way voice communication (so that you can talk to your baby), and there are plans afoot to let parents upload their infant’s favourite tunes into the camera so that it can be played instantly with the press of a button.
The DCS-825L mydlink Cloud Wireless Baby Camera is available at authorised retailers such as Challenger Singapore, resellers and distribution partners. For more information on the camera or the firm’s other products, head on over to www.dlink.com.sg.
NATURAL BOTOX IN A BOTTLE A decade ago, cosmetics company NUXE revolutionised the cosmetics industry with Nirvanesque, the first cream in the world that mimicked the results of Botox treatments – battling expression lines and wrinkles – just by regular application. Instead of resting on its laurels, the beauty firm sought to improve its bestselling range, and today, NUXE has again significantly transformed Nirvanesque with a bit of help from its skin scientists. Using only the best natural ingredients, the new Nirvanesque promises to counter the first signs of wrinkles and stress lines at twice the strength, thanks to a little Tree Peony Extract plant magic.
TRAVEL IN IMPECCABLE STYLE Take a look around your typical airport lounge and you’ll see how most travellers are dressed for comfort instead of style in anticipation of the long aeroplane ride. Stand out from the crowd and exude class during your next family holiday with the recently launched Samsonite Black Label Python Collection. Blending prestige, sophistication and quality into a sturdy external shell, the new Python luggage collection is a head-turner, no matter where you go. But, don’t let their gorgeous exteriors fool you. Each piece in the series is casted with 100 percent durable and hardy polycarbonate, a hardy material that can withstand rough handling from airport staff and possible damage during flights. We love how the new luggage is embedded with a certified TSA combination lock; we’ve had many broken locks during our trips to the US. Choose from three different shades, red, black or grey-white, each of which is personified by its unique animal skin pattern shell design.
The Samsonite Black Label Python Collection is available in leading departmental stores and Samsonite boutiques at ION Orchard, Marina Square, The Shoppes at Marina Bay Sands, Mandarin Gallery, Suntec City and VivoCity.
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Family & Life • Feb 2014
Whether you’re a busy career Mum or a harried Dad, the new Nirvanesque is a wonderful addition to your skincare regime to keep you looking at your best, even in your advancing years. NUXE has also released suitable
creams for the different types of skin – combination, normal or dry.
The new Nirvanesque is noncomedogenic and are free of mineral oil and materials of animal origin. Discover this natural Botox in a bottle at all Robinsons, John Little and Beauty By Nature stores. Selected Watsons stores also stock the new range.
NEED TO CUT COSTS? We have less drastic solutions
Singapore-based accounting firm Origins, provides customised financial solutions to businesses and high net worth individuals. Save up to 90% of your costs in accounting and regulatory compliance. Give us a call today! Our Professional Services include: • Accounting and bookkeeping • Nominee shareholder and director service • Individual and corporate taxation • Audit and business assurance
• Consolidation of group accounts • Local and offshore incorporation • Company secretarial services • Application for employment and work pass
51 Goldhill Plaza #19-06, Singapore 308900 O: (65) 6353 5608 | E: info@originscorpsvcs.com | W: www.originscorpsvcs.com
SCANDINAVIAN DESIGN, CHINESE CULTURE The purveyors of designer furniture at functional prices (and one of our favourite family stores to boot) have launched a new limited collection consisting of around 30 products, just in time for the Chinese New Year season. TRENDIG 2013 is the stunning fusion of Chinese culture and Scandinavian design and features traditional Asian green and red colours mixed with natural blonde materials. With 30 products focused on dining and eating, the TRENDIG 2013 collection is only available for a limited time, so hurry and make your way to your neighbourhood IKEA stores for some festive furniture this year. Our favourite is the TRENDIG 2013 cabinet, with its cute, circular handles painted a beautiful shade of red and the intricate motif door design. We definitely see this becoming a living room conversation starter!
The TRENDIG 2013 limited collection is available at IKEA stores and features cabinets, chairs, stools, tables, a butcher’s block, a lazy Susan and more. For more information, check out www.fb.com/ IKEASingapore.
TURN HEADS
Bespoke boutique hair salon And . A is running a promotion for first-time clients to its premises. Transform your tresses in the capable hands of its hair artists; opt for one of its hair treatments (colour, perm, rebonding, etc.) and you get to enjoy a haircut, an aromatherapy shoulder massage and a gourmet handcrafted beverage, all on the house!
A TOUCH OF MAGICAL SAND A concept straight out from the pages of a science fiction novel, Kinetic Sand has been making waves around the world after its demonstration video went viral. And now, this revolutionary plaything has finally arrived on the shores of Singapore. The sensational Kinetic Sand is an easy-to-shape blob of sand that looks and feels like real sand, just without the messy clean up! Made from pure sand and a non-toxic polymer, Kinetic Sand moves like a dense fluid and is great for enhancing sensory awareness, fine motor skills and creativity. We love how it is nontoxic, gluten-free and impervious to bacteria. So, you can rest easy when your child is playing with Kinetic Sand! And, of course, you will be happy to know that your kid will also be learning while playing at the same time. So, yes, head out there and grab a packet of Kinetic Sand. We bet that you will be having loads of fun playing with it too!
Kinetic Sand can be purchased at Not Too Big, Toy Tag, Smart Alley, Toy Outpost, The Children’s Showcase and Candyplay stores. You can also buy it online at www.pupsikstudio.com. The 1 kg and 5 kg packets go for S$29.90 and S$83.90 respectively.
Recently opened, And . A promises to pamper you in opulent luxury with its Takara Belmont shampoo stations and limited edition Pierre Paulin Pumpkin red wool armchairs. Founder and coiffure enthusiast Angela Lee has flown in hairstylists from Japan, South Korea and Hong Kong and more to cater to the different tastes of its rapidly growing clientele. Discover what everyone is talking about. And enjoy it for free. We are sure you will be back for more.
And . A is located at Far East Plaza 14 Scotts Road #02-29/30/31 Singapore 228213. Book an appointment with them by giving them a call at 6235 1230.
Feb 2014 • Family & Life
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COVERSTORY
When Jazz Meets
Jazz crooner. Former Singapore national team water skier. CEO of TCM powerhouse Eu Yan Sang. Father. Philanthropist. Meet Richard Eu, a human dynamo.
You have to consciously think about how your actions are going to positively influence the people around you. The way my children and in the future, their children, live their lives is a reflection of the way I lived my life and how I brought them up.
Chinese Herbs
Richard Eu calls himself “ancient, a dinosaur” and although his age is creeping northward into the 70s, the man still boasts a healthy head of black hair, just slightly flecked with grey, and a clarity of mind capable of leading a major international business.
Richard is the fourth-generation leader of Eu Yan Sang International, one of the giants in traditional Chinese medicine, and the first name that leaps to the minds of many young Singaporeans when they think about TCM. This achievement has undoubtedly been made possible by Richard’s bold decisions – adopting modern and scientific methods in production and rejuvenating the very image of TCM to keep up with an English-speaking younger generation brought up on a diet of Western culture and influences. Richard dispensed with the traditional methods – the pink paper, the balance scales, the abacuses – and introduced a splash of glamour while still retaining the strict quality controls that Eu Yan Sang had come to be associated with.
His moves paid off handsomely. From one outlet in Singapore, five in Malaysia and two in Hong Kong when Richard took over, the brand rapidly expanded around the region and today, Eu Yan Sang has a total of 298 outlets and 32 clinics in six countries – Australia, China, Hong Kong, Macau, Malaysia and of course, Singapore.
But, instead of resting on his laurels and enjoying the fruits of his labour (especially since he is at an age when most people would kick back and relax), Richard is still keeping himself on top of all the developments in the industry. Just in May last year, Eu Yan Sang’s Hong Kong subsidiary inked a landmark deal with Sichuan Neautus, a TCM company based in Chengdu, China, to set up a TCM decoction pieces plant there. Yet, despite all that Richard has achieved in his storied career, what the jazz lover wants to be most remembered for in life is not how he has propelled Eu Yan Sang to the top of the pile. It is far simpler than that. “I want to be remembered as being a good father,” says Richard simply. “After all, the amount of money you have made won’t matter because you cannot take what you’ve made to the grave. Money is not the measurement of your worth.” It is an ethos he adopted from his parents, who were both incredibly active philanthropists. His father, also named Richard, was a former chairman of the Community Chest while his mother devoted a large portion of her free time volunteering at St Andrew’s Mission Hospital and numerous other children’s charities in the country. Richard, who has four relatively grown-up children (Richard “the Third”, Anthony, Christopher and Rebecca), hopes to leave a legacy of enriching the lives of the people he has interacted with. More importantly, he wants to pass on this selfless attitude to his children. “You have to consciously think about how your actions are going to positively influence the people around you. The way my children and in the future, their children, live their lives
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Family & Life • Feb 2014
By Farhan Shah
is a reflection of the way I lived my life and how I brought them up,” says Richard. If there is one slight regret Richard has about his children’s upbringing, it is that perhaps he has not taught them enough about the value of money. At this point in the interview, he turns contemplative, collecting his thoughts. “I think my children are quite spoiled but, at the same time, I believe they appreciate what they have. I suppose there is a fine line when it comes to spoiling or depriving your children. There are the more traditional parents who hold the view that children should be deprived completely while on the other end of the spectrum, you have kids getting the keys to a Lamborghini when they turn 17.” There is a twinkle in his eye when he says the last few words, as though alluding to a real-life scenario that he knows of. “But, you never know what the right and wrong methods are. There are kids who grow up with all these good qualities even though they have been spoiled while there are those who were deprived during their childhood and became a bit, shall we say, crazy when they come into money,” says Richard. So, he chooses the path of moderation, giving them money “but not too much” while still educating them about the world around them through volunteering and philanthropy. The self-professed rebel has certainly done his part, contributing significant amounts of both his time and money to various charitable organisations. He even cut a jazz album last year titled 66, a nod to both his age and “one of the best periods of his life, the Swinging Sixties”. The proceeds from the sales are channelled to the Rainbow Centre, a voluntary welfare organisation that operates two schools for children with special needs, and the Dover Park Hospice. His reasons for producing a charitable album instead of just heading down the traditional philanthropic route and hosting a
gala dinner? One, a CD is a more tangible product with a longer shelf lifespan and two, well, he gets to strike off an item on his bucket list. And although Richard is not the first prominent hobbyist musician to cut a record, he is certainly one of the rare few to tackle the project with such gusto and passion. Richard flew to Paris to record 66 with French producer Bruno Le Flanchec and had over a dozen session musicians swing by the studio to lay down backing instrumentals for seven of the nine tracks. On the album sleeve, Richard dedicates the album to his “father and late mother, who didn’t disown me when I thought the point of studying in London during the Swinging Sixties was to be like Mick Jagger”. Music is certainly a subject Richard is fond of and something he clearly is knowledgeable in. An off-the-cuff remark about The Rolling Stones being a rock band turned into a short lecture about the evolution of jazz and rock and roll. “A large part of jazz and rock actually started from blues music! Then, it branched out to become jazz on one side and rock on the other side. Following that, rock music became the modern rock that you know today through bands such as Led Zeppelin. Everything that happens today is a result of what happened in the past before us.
Ultimately, you have to acknowledge your roots,” says Richard. The past is something Richard is keenly aware of. The grandson of one of Singapore’s most iconic historical figures, Eu Tong Sen, has built a memory lane of sorts on the first floor of Eu Yan Sang’s new offices within the Tai Seng industrial estate. Old photos of significant family members are plastered on the walls and share space with a large, imposing grandfather clock that once chimed the hours in the hallway of Eu Villa, situated at Adis Road, Mount Sophia. A picture of a road sign, Eu Tong Sen Street, pays homage to Richard’s grandfather, the one who started the ball rolling. You could say the past has moulded Richard into the man he is today. The eldest son grew up in a world of privilege within the whitewashed walls of Eu Villa, kept clean by a crew of amahs. The 2.2 ha estate was home to several Eu families and was, at that time, one of Singapore’s largest private houses. However, Richard never allowed the display of wealth around him to lull him into a sense of complacency. He recognised and understood how blessed he was, that he was able to grow up in relative comfort while all around him, a sea of social change was beginning to disrupt and engulf the world. These rebellions appealed to Richard’s inner James Dean.
“During those days, discipline was a dominant theme but I never liked being told what to do. I broke curfews and even failed exams,” says Richard, chortling heartily. Fortunately, “my children are not rebellious like me”, he remarks good naturedly. And although most of his brood has already reached adulthood, save for the youngest Rebecca who is still in school, Richard still makes time to connect with them and find out how their lives have been. On the topic of succession in the business, Richard actually prefers that his children begin their careers working outside the family business. “My children are not living my life; they have got to live their own lives. You cannot expect them to be who you
want them to be. They must have their own minds. They must be their own person,” says Richard philosophically. Yet, he would undeniably be happy if his children decide to return to Eu Yan Sang and contribute to its success. Already, his eldest son is part of the company, having left his job with a private equity firm in July last year. In the meantime, as the years pass by, Richard has occasionally entertained thoughts of taking his foot off the accelerator pedal and slowing down, perhaps even retire. But, he acknowledges that is highly unlikely. “I will probably do more charity work but I will still want to be involved in the business in some way,” he muses. Until then, there is a lot more that needs to be done. Feb 2014 • Family & Life
7
FOCUS
#rebel #entrepreneur #mother By Farhan Shah
Just past the Bukit Pasoh conservation area is an iconic three-storey shop house steeped with history. It was where the eminent Mr Lee Kuan Yew spent time at when he was a young boy. Today, in the very same house, lady entrepreneur Tjin Lee plays Mummy to baby Tyler.
Tyler Lim rocks a T-shirt with a print of his namesake Tyler Durden, the antagonist from the cult film Fight Club, on the front, and has a plethora of caps in his wardrobe. Occasionally, when Tyler is out on the streets with his entourage, he gets recognised by excited strangers. Once, at an event he was attending at ION Orchard, a group of people enthusiastically approached the receptionist to ask whether he was the Tyler, made famous through Instagram.
all, Bubu has given her and John a fresh lease of life. “I can’t wait to take him on his first trip to the zoo. I can’t wait to bring him to his first roller coaster ride. Heck, I can’t wait to let him have his first taste of ice cream!”
relations, branding and other related work. On top of that, she’s also helped kick-start three other small businesses run by stay-at-home mothers, which also made her realise the viability of CRIB.
Wait, he hasn’t eaten ice cream before?
But, Tyler or Bubu, as he’s more affectionately known as, can barely speak a word of English to acknowledge his growing legion of fans. You see, Bubu is only 10-monthsold. And his aforementioned entourage is actually his parents – John Lim, the strapping operations manager of international commodities firm Glencore Xstrata, and Tjin Lee, founder of the Mercury Group and the lady responsible for the world-class Audi Fashion Festival Singapore.
But, besides the renewed vigour and pep in Tjin’s step, Bubu’s presence in her life has also galvanised her entrepreneurial mind. The working mother now understands more than most the challenges of being a career Mum, juggling the demands of bringing up a baby with the responsibilities of her job. It really is a trial by fire, a pressure cooker of sorts with no second chances, and understandably, many women leave the workforce to become stay-at-home Mums, devoting their time to raising their children. “Singapore has a huge untapped and unharnessed talent pool of these mothers, some of whom were previously lawyers, doctors, bankers, accountants, etc. Yes, indeed, family is very important but, at the same time, when you look at the severe shortage of manpower in our workforce, you begin to wonder whether there is any way we can concurrently help these mothers and Singapore.”
With so many responsibilities to oversee, it’s amazing how this Mummy even has the energy and time to keep up with her growing baby while maintaining personal and business relationships, and Tjin admits that it can be tricky, cumbersome even, to fit everything onto her plate. “That is one of the reasons why I’m very excited about CRIB because it can be hard to find and maintain work-life balance when you are a working Mum. Everyone talks about it but yet, this work-life balance is like this mythical unicorn that’s so hard to find. How do you actually achieve it?”
Bubu’s fame is really just a stunning demonstration of the power of properly-wielded social media. Of course, Bubu can barely say a word, let alone compose a picture and upload it for the world to see. So, in his case, the wielder is his mother. “Granted, I’m uploading all his photos on Instagram without his knowledge and although the reception has been very positive, I hope he doesn’t grow up and question me, ‘Why did you put all my pictures up?’” Tjin says, her laughter echoing around the living room of her home. Presently though, Tjin is having a ball of a time, not just in dressing up her little bundle of joy and “instagramming” the fashionable results but in life itself. For this self-professed jaded lady who has seen and done it
It can be hard to find and maintain work-life balance when you are a working Mum. Everyone talks about it but yet, this work-life balance is like this mythical unicorn that’s so hard to find. How do you actually achieve it? 8
Family & Life • Feb 2014
Tjin chuckles again and says that both she and John keep him on a tight leash, so, “no ice cream for the moment”.
Tjin is betting her bottom dollar that there is. In fact, she’s investing in it. It’s a little something she calls CRIB, short for Creating Responsible Innovative Businesses, and it is a social enterprise that Tjin is setting up with a few other partners to empower the talented stay-at-home Mums to become their own part-time entrepreneurs while still having time for their families. At the moment, the idea is still in its infancy but Tjin is incredibly excited about its potential to help out mothers who have the talents and the ideas, but not the capital, to begin their foray into the business world. It’s a realm that Tjin is very familiar with, having grown the Mercury Group from a group of three people in 2008 into a 40-strong company handling events, public
Tjin feels this issue is even more critical in Singapore, especially with the city-state’s declining birth rate. “If you and your spouse work in full-time jobs, then the both of you probably won’t have more than one child because you only have the time to take care of one. However, if one of you stops working to take care of the baby, then you’re living on one income, which probably means that you have to compromise on your standard of living. Then, this begs the question: would you have the resources to have a second baby?” These remarks and questions come hard and fast from Tjin and her gesticulations become even more pronounced. It is clear that these are topics that she feels strongly about and while most people would stand idly by and do nothing, Tjin hopes that CRIB will be the precursor to even bigger and greater things, not just for stay-at-home Mums but for Singaporean families as a whole. For most people with practicality as their guiding compass, CRIB sounds like a lofty and almost unreachable goal but for Tjin, she truly believes that it’s possible. Considering her background, it’s not a surprise. Even when she was a young girl in school, Tjin had always dreamt big and even, shall we say, uniquely. While most of her peers coloured within the lines and unquestioningly followed the teacher’s instructions, Tjin was
wonder, ‘How will he feed himself? How is he going to afford a car in Singapore?’ These are concerns that you’ll only start having once you have a child. Of course, I hope that he becomes successful if he does choose to pursue a career in the creative industries but I then, I feel like telling him, ‘My son, there are easier ways to do this’.”
always looking for a better way to do it. Her maverick approach to life was an anomaly in the strait-laced 70s and 80s. “Back in my day, in Primary Six, we had to write a composition based on a comic strip consisting of six numbered panels and all of us had to follow the sequence of events. I remembered thinking why I had to follow this and decided to jump to panel four instead, which was an image of a boat capsizing,” Tjin reminisces. “I even remember how I started the essay. It was with ‘The angry waves lashed against the sides of the old boat’. The reason why this story is always stuck in my mind is because my teacher called me out to the front of the class and questioned me whether my mother had wrote it because it was too well-written!” Tjin was indignant and her mother was similarly incensed, marching down to school to berate the teaching body for accusing Tjin of doing something she did not do, or in this case, not doing something that she actually did. You could say Tjin was someone creatively ahead of her time, even at such an impressionable age, and she was fortunate to be raised by parents that supported her creative, albeit slightly off-the-wall, ambitions. And now that Tjin has become a mother, she too hopes to emulate her parents, supporting Bubu in
whatever he chooses to do. There is just one problem though: Tjin finally understands why her Mum and Dad always handled her freespiritedness with kid gloves. “It was only after having Bubu that I figured out the fears that parents have concerning their children. You want them to have a good life and to be able to live comfortably. And what’s the best and safest route that your children can take such that this is possible? Be a doctor or a lawyer or any of those professional careers,” Tjin reveals.
Don’t get Tjin wrong though. She is a firm supporter of creative professions (she is in the creative line herself!) and genuinely believes that the country is slowly but surely developing and embracing the arts and culture. One only needs to look at the 2014 edition of the Audi Fashion Festival, which will be organised independently without any government funding, to see how far we’ve come as a nation. In the meantime though, Tjin and her husband are cherishing the everyday memories
they’re creating with Bubu and of course, immortalising these filtered moments on Instagram for the world to see. The global citizen admits her life has changed drastically with the arrival of Bubu and occasionally, she would feel a pang of sadness while flipping through old travel albums and realising how young and free she was back then. “I would tell John that it has been more than nine months since my wings were clipped. He would tell me not to worry because I am growing fresh pair of wings and soon enough, I would be able to do it all over again.” Then, Tjin would look over at Bubu and marvel at how far she has come since her rebellious days of yore. Then, she would smile. There was no time to feel sorry for herself. After all, there was a whole new adventure to look forward to with her #family.
She lets out a sigh, her eyes clearly betraying the internal conflict that she has between her bohemian and sensible sides. “I want him to pursue whatever ambitions he has, whether it’s in fashion or in business, and to be a dreamer like I was. Then, I look at him again with the practical eyes of a parent and I
I want him to pursue whatever ambitions he has, whether it’s in fashion or in business, and to be a dreamer like I was. Then, I look at him again with the practical eyes of a parent and I wonder, ‘How will he feed himself? How is he going to afford a car in Singapore?’ These are concerns that you’ll only start having once you have a child. Feb 2014 • Family & Life
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FOCUS
Meet Singapore’s
Tony Stark
By Farhan Shah
He’s been hailed as a visionary maverick while others might think he is a little too eccentric. Lim Seng is unruffled; he follows the beat of his own drum, whether it comes to parenting or launching a Singaporean into space.
Lim Seng is the epitome of the global citizen, having left his mark on almost every continent on the planet, save for perhaps Antarctica. And even so, it might only be a matter of time before the coldest landmass on earth bears his boot print. However, despite Lim’s nomadic lifestyle, his voice still has the reassuring Singaporean twang and his speech is peppered with euphemisms and colloquialisms that only a born and bred local would be able to fully understand. His passion for the country and her people is apparent even in his aspirations. Lim is the founder and managing director of IN.Genius (short for Innovation.Genius), a high-technology start-up that is focused on solving world problems. Early this year, the small firm was in the news after Lim made a bold promise that was met with much scepticism; he wanted to launch the first Singaporean into space by 2015. Today, Lim and his crack team of highly dedicated scientists and engineers are starting to see their vision crystallised – last September, they successfully launched their eighth and final unmanned test flight. Yet, despite the giant strides IN.Genius has made to achieve its space goal, Lim still has a myriad of doubters and naysayers, all of whom believe that he’ll fall short of his aim. And sadly, most of them are Singaporeans.
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None of these bother Lim though. After all, he’s had to battle stereotypes and topple stacked odds all his life. And he’s won each time, assembling an impressive body of work along the way. He drafted the Unmanned Technology Master Plan for Singapore, designed the first UAV simulator in the world, set up Singapore’s first offshore Defence Technology Office for Europe in Paris and more. A man of his calibre and talent does not go unnoticed, so when Lim decided to test his mettle in the private sector, a host of huge technology firms offered him a position. Relishing the challenge, Lim joined the European Aeronautic Defence and Space Company (EADS), becoming a senior advisor and vicepresident for two different divisions in the company.
Becoming one of the rare top-ranking Asians in a European company led to some very interesting situations. “I’ve been mistaken for the driver or the tourist guide every time I’ve led a high-powered delegation for a meeting,” says Lim, chuckling as he shares his different hilarious travel experiences, a lot of which involved overturning conventional stereotypes. Interestingly, Lim has been described as Singapore’s version of British business magnate Richard Branson by a few local newspapers, but a better and more accurate description for him would be Singapore’s reallife Tony Stark instead. Just like the Iron Man’s alter ego, Lim possesses a brilliant science and engineering brain that easily comprehends concepts such as neutron flux and
Yet, we rarely see Singaporeans on the world stage creating something both extraordinary and brave, like my space programme. When it comes to actually doing something, I must say that we lack courage in making things happen. Singaporeans have extremely capable minds, but we lack the guts and the heart to be world-beaters.
irradiation channels. Couple that brain with a never-say-die attitude and the belief that anything is possible as long as you put your mind into it, and you have one of the most innovative persons Singapore has ever produced. He does have his own “Pepper Potts” too, whom he met by chance. One of his assistants had given his number to a sales lady toting timeshare packages (“Scam artist, more like!” Lim chortles) named Polly. She called him to set up an appointment and their relationship slowly progressed from there. Two years later, in 1991, Lim and Polly got married, and Polly packed her suitcase to join him on his constant travels. Their first child, Nicole, grew up in US. Six years later, the three of them welcomed a new girl, Cherie, into their family when they were living in France. Today, all four of them make their home in a cosy two-storey abode in the eastern part of Singapore, waking up to the crowing of roosters in the morning (their neighbour’s pets) and the smell of Lim’s cooking. That’s right, Lim is quite the wizard in the kitchen, according to his wife and two daughters. On top of that, the man has also won multiple wine tasting competitions, thanks to an amazing palette.
Is there nothing you cannot do? “I cannot sing!” reveals Lim with a grin. “I did try though. I hired a music teacher and went for one Chinese music lesson. Towards the end of the lesson, the teacher eyed me carefully before saying, ‘You can’t read Chinese characters, can you?’ There were no more music lessons after that!” In spite of his failure, the music lesson is a wonderful testament of Lim’s mantra – trying everything in life once. And while a lot of people are the sort to only spout this philosophy without actually following it, Marvyn walks the talk. He’s already ploughed his own money into the space project in the hopes that it will inspire the youths of Singapore to “not only dream but dare to do”. It is this gung-ho quality that Lim feels many Singaporeans are sorely lacking. “We are one of the best in math and science, consistently coming out tops in academic competitions such as the International Mathematical Olympiad. Yet, we rarely see Singaporeans on the world stage creating something both extraordinary and brave, like my space programme. When it comes to actually doing something, I must say that we lack courage in making things
happen. Singaporeans have extremely capable minds, but we lack the guts and the heart to be world-beaters.” On the bright side, the bold visionary believes that Singapore has all the ingredients needed to create innovative talent; she just needs to make a couple of tweaks. He also has strong opinions about the country’s education system but, surprisingly enough, feels that it is one of the best in world, despite his own brushes with the system in his juvenile past – the maverick once cut a big hole in the school fence so that his schoolmates could directly access the hawker centre and circumvent the circuitous and troublesome route through the school gate, which was located quite a distance away. His “disruptive innovation”, though lauded by his peers, earned him a public caning. His two daughters are already displaying similar creative traits, albeit without breaking any school rules. Lim’s eldest daughter, Nicole, is very supportive of the space effort and has unofficially become his right-hand woman, attending multiple meetings and visually documenting the journey with her Nikon camera. The aspiring photojournalist and communications major in Nanyang Technological University has even skipped a couple of lectures and tutorials to join the team during the spacecraft’s test flights, with the blessings of her father. “Opportunities like this don’t come often, if at all! You cannot get such experiences from the pages of your textbooks and I’m glad Nicole was able to be there to soak in the event while learning at the same time,” says Lim. As for the 15-year old Cherie, she has participated in the prestigious Model United Nations conference, and is gunning for a pilot licence the moment she turns flight-legal a year from now, so that she too can be in the running to helm the spacecraft’s controls. And lest you think she was pressured in some way, Lim assures that that’s not the case. In fact, both Lim and Polly are strong advocates of standing on your own two feet and finding your own way in life. From young, Nicole and Cherie have always been taught to be responsible. “We don’t chauffeur them around and we don’t own a car, so they take public transport. I had
I had the option of hiring a few maids but I never took it up because I wanted my children to grow up normally and learn to take care of themselves. It’s very simply really: if you drink a cup of water, then you wash your own cup.
the option of hiring a few maids when they were growing up overseas but I turned it down because I wanted my children to learn to take care of themselves. It’s very simply really: if you drink a cup of water, then you wash your own cup,” Lim shares. The stance that Lim and Polly take with their children is atypical of most Singaporean parents. Nicole and Cherie have almost absolute freedom to do whatever they want without the need to ask for permission and are not given undue pressure to succeed academically, “just as long as they are not last in the class”, says Lim. However, Lim and Polly’s relaxed attitude towards their children’s academic progress doesn’t mean that they are uninterested. It’s just that they’ve set different priorities – Lim and Polly are more focused on grooming their two daughters into upstanding citizens who are moralistic and independent thinkers and doers. For example, every movie they watch together as a family is seen as an opportunity to teach different values and gain lifelong lessons, and Lim and Polly are not shy to openly express their love and affection for their daughters. All four of them have also
started a charity effort in Haig Girls’ School, teaching life skills to the children of poor families to give them a better future. It’s clear their parenting approach is working out. Despite being granted the license to do whatever they like, the two young ladies have not abused this privilege. “If I don’t get good results in my examinations, I’ll feel that I’ve let them down. It’s the least I could do since they’ve been gracious enough to give me this privilege of freedom,” says Cherie, displaying a sense of maturity befitting of someone five years older. The girls have even gone to find and hire their own tuition teachers when they were falling behind academically in a subject, a move usually unseen in today’s youths, who would avoid tuition if they could. But, Nicole and Cherie are unlike other youths. They are racing away from the pack and finding their own way in life, just like their father once did. And even if the both of them turn out to be nothing like what Lim is right now, he would be more than happy because that means he’s done his job – guiding them to grow up and become their own people.
Feb 2014 • Family & Life
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FOCUS
Tammy is
All Grown Up By Farhan Shah
She first caught the public eye, playing the role of Tammy in the popular local television drama, Growing Up. Twenty years, two marriages and a baby later, Jamie Yeo has definitely grown up.
Jamie Yeo is, without a doubt, seasoned with the media. It’s early on a Saturday morning with the kind of weather made for long, relaxed brunches – warm with just the right touch of humidity – and denim cut-off shorts but Jamie emerges dressed in a stunning green ensemble designed to turn heads and drop jaws. “So, where are we holding the photo shoot?” she says cheerily. “Shall we head down? The weather is perfect.” Numerous smiles and poses later, we’re back in her apartment, a cosy three-bedroom condominium at the base of Bukit Timah hill, lounging and chatting on the sofa. She’s slipped out of the green dress into something more comfortable. You guessed it – denim cut-off shorts. Her swift wardrobe change is an apt metaphor for her life right now: the flawless image she presents when she’s in the public eye and the relaxed persona of a loving wife and doting
Mummy that Jamie is most contented in when she’s behind closed doors. And after having been in the entertainment industry and public spotlight for close to two decades, Jamie would be forgiven for being a bit jaded with the ravenous media circus, especially after her high-profile divorce with former colleague Glenn Ong more than five years back that dominated column inches for months on end. Yet, to her credit, Jamie was effervescent, chatty and at peace during the interview. She’s found her happy centre and it’s clear that her husband, 38-year-old Thorsten Nolte, and rambunctious three-year-old daughter Alysia have played significant roles in this development. Jamie and Thorsten met backstage in 2009 during The Prodigy’s concert after a mutual friend introduced the both of them to each other. After a year of courtship, they exchanged vows in a low-key wedding ceremony that was attended by a few close family members and friends. Jamie was already about 14 weeks pregnant, an unplanned accident according to the gossip mongers, at the time of the wedding. Jamie reassures me otherwise. “Honestly, in this day and age, it’s so hard to have an unplanned pregnancy if you take the proper precautions. I had actually actively stopped taking the birth control pills because the common consensus in the medical community is that, on average, it takes a few months for your body to start ovulating normally so that you would be ready to bear a child.” Jamie’s body took only two weeks. Unfortunately for Jamie and Thorsten, little Alysia was born more than two months premature. She weighed only slightly more than a kilogram and had to be put under observation for close to two months before being given a clean bill of health and allowed to go back home. Even then, Jamie struggled with breastfeeding; her body was unable to produce adequate milk for Alysia and she had to supplement it with formula. “It was just one of those issues that I had to overcome and I kept reminding myself that there were a lot of Mums out there just like me that were grappling
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with the same problem,” Jamie says matter-of-factly. “Thank God we live in a world where formula milk is relatively nutritious!” Three years later, the infant who used to struggle with the very act of breathing has grown up into a energetic three-year-old tyke with a love for chocolates and a fascination for pebbles. “She loves playing with stones! She’s very fascinated with them,” Thorsten chimes in. “Yeah, she would bring home a stone and hold it in her hands,” Jamie says before turning to Alysia, who was playing what I assume to be a game of patty-cake with my photographer, and asking her: “Right sweetie? Why do you like stones?” Alysia stops clapping her hands and answers: “Because I want to throw them.”
Throw them at people? “No! I like to throw them into the water, at the river downstairs,” she replies in mock indignation before focusing her attention on a more pressing nature – the game of pattycake. For Thorsten and Jamie, Alysia has been more than just a new addition into their family. She has given the both of them new leases of life, teaching them to appreciate the little things in the world, as evidenced by the stones episode. Thorsten says, admiration apparent in his voice: “Thanks to Alysia, I’m seeing life through the eyes of a child again, where every small detail has a sense of wonder attached to it. You forget this when you become an adult going through your day and I’m glad that with Alysia, every single thing is wonderful.” More than that, Alysia has taught the both of them the true meaning of benevolence, of giving everything you have without truly expecting nothing in return. As Jamie says, “you are not utterly selfless until you have a child”. The 36-year-old, who took a year off to raise Alysia, now has her plate full with her responsibilities as a mother, her duties on The Power Breakfast Show and her new business venture, Mums.SG, that she is very excited about. Jamie started the online baby store with her friend Tristan Lo, a father of two, based on her experiences as a working mother. One of its features is an online marketplace for entrepreneurial mothers to hawk the wares that they
I’m going to hate myself for saying this since I’m a business owner but wages in Singapore are far too low when you take costs of living into consideration. have created. It is Jamie’s way of providing a platform for mothers in Singapore to financially provide for their families even when they are at home looking after the brood. She understands that some families may face financial difficulties when they have a child; she experienced it firsthand with the birth of Alysia.
before the sun sets to be with Alysia. Similarly, Thorsten has an enviously flexible schedule, being the owner of a communications agency.
getting for her PSLE! Children at that age should not be segregated based on the grades they get from one examination,” says Jamie.
Jamie’s and Thorsten’s lives and career goals have evolved alongside Alysia’s growth. “For me, raising a family comes first and everything else is secondary. Work will always be work and whatever I achieve in my business or at work will never be able to give as much satisfaction as seeing Alysia grow an inch in the space of a month. Our work and businesses are really just a way to provide for her,” says Jamie.
Thorsten echoes her sentiments, not mincing his words: “One of the things that struck me about Singapore’s education system is its rigidity. Yes, everyone is very smart and learns a lot of theoretical knowledge, yet a lot of them are woefully short of life lessons and are not able to critically assess a problem and discover a solution without instruction. They also have a poor understanding of how the world works and are unable to adjust to different cultures.”
The two of them have already thought about Alysia’s future academic options and surprisingly, the duo are not huge fans of Singapore’s gradesoriented education system. “I want Alysia to have fun when she’s young and not be stressed out at the age of 12 over the grades she will be
says it as it is, which is why he and Jamie are hoping to send Alysia to an international school so that she receives a more well-rounded education, unencumbered by the superficial pursuit of letters on a report card.
Any plans for a second child then since you are having so much fun with Alysia? Jamie laughs and says that plans are afoot but “no, nowhere in the near future”. They are having too much fun with Alysia, seeing her grow up and guiding her to become a friendly, confident young lady, perhaps one who is seasoned with the media.
His opinion might come across as harsh in many quarters but Thorsten
The deceptively simple dilemma of either sustaining the family on one income or continuing with each other’s respective careers is more intricate than most people can fathom. And this issue takes on even more importance in Singapore, ranked the fifth costliest city to live in according to Mercer’s Cost of Living 2013 survey. This topic – the rising cost of living – is something that irks both Jamie and Thorsten. “I’m going to hate myself for saying this since I’m a business owner but wages in Singapore are far too low when you take costs of living into consideration,” Thorsten says with conviction. Jamie agrees whole-heartedly. “Honestly, it’s getting quite bad now. As a mother, you want only the best for your child but you have to take into account your financial situation because it is really expensive to raise a child in Singapore.” Jamie brings up an issue close to the heart of every Singaporean parent – pre-school. “The difference in quality that you get between subsidised childcare and private pre-schools is amazingly high. Of course, you do get what you pay for but I genuinely feel that, at the end of the day, you can make sacrifices in many aspects of life except for your child’s education.” Having said that though, Jamie and Thorsten acknowledges that they are far luckier than most Singaporean families, despite their grievances about the system. Jamie presents for a couple of hours in the morning and then, if she has gigs lined up, hosts in the afternoon. Yet, even so, she’s generally home in time
Feb 2014 • Family & Life
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NURTURE
The Fallacy of (Work Hard, Get Smart?)
Intelligence
If you think that intelligence is mostly inherited, you are not alone. Thanks to a combination of the media and truisms, many parents believe that their child already have a predetermined amount of intelligence. The truth is more complex than that, as Family & Life finds out.
Contrary to popular belief, your child’s intelligence, or potential intelligence, is not actually determined by you and your spouse’s collective brain genes. In fact, it has been discovered and accepted among the academic community that the average IQ of the world keeps increasing year after year, and is known as the “Flynn Effect”. According to Professor Miles Kimball from the University of Michigan, researchers and scientists have not the faintest clue about the upper limits of human intelligence. How does this apply to your child and his future? Simple. Your child’s IQ, and by extension, intelligence, is highly malleable and can increase or even decrease, depending on the activities he or she partakes in. Professor Kimball stresses that the misconception that “you are born with a certain amount of intelligence and you cannot really do much to change it” is very harmful to the child, who might grow up believing that he or she will be consigned to a certain class of society. In a study done by the Wellcome Trust Centre for Neuroimaging at University College London, a group of researchers studied 33 British students, giving them IQ tests and brain scans at the age of 12 and then again at the age of 16. Nine percent of the students had a significant change of 15 points or more in IQ scores. More pertinently, the scans showed that the students’ grey matter – linked to IQ – had increased over time.
The misconception that you are born with a certain amount of intelligence and you cannot really do much to change it is very harmful to the child, who might grow up believing that he or she will be consigned to a certain class of society. 14
Family & Life • Feb 2014
Similarly, author and social psychology professor Richard Nisbett expounds in his book Intelligence and How to Get It: Why Schools and Cultures Count that intelligence is “principally determined by societal influences”. One of the studies he presented was when a group of psychologists tried to convince “a group of poor minority students that intelligence is highly malleable and be developed by hard work”. These students, who believed intelligence was mostly inherited, began working harder and subsequently received higher grades. The key to increasing your child’s intelligence is to consistently engage him or her in complex activities such as music or games of the mind such as chess. Children who regularly went for music lessons gained slightly more than one IQ point a year. Unfortunately, these gains eroded when the lessons were stopped for a period of time. However, parents, you would be happy to know that in general, schooling has been demonstrated to raise your child’s IQ by several points a year.
The Importance of Hard Work in Math Have you ever heard your child coming back home after a long day at school, complaining that he or she is not a Math person, and will never be? Mathematics is probably one of the most polarising subjects (children either love it or hate it) in the school curriculum, yet its importance cannot be understated. Math is also a wonderful indicator of the value of aforementioned hard work in increasing intelligence because of how quick the results can be seen. Granted, some children have a natural affinity to numbers and are able to grasp mathematical concepts quicker than others. However, with hard work and practice, every child will be able to attain a certain proficiency in the subject. After all, math is the foundation for advanced topics such as physics and economics, and subsequently, opens the door to a variety of careers. Unfortunately, due to the rapid pace of Singapore’s education system, some children will unfortunately fall behind and get disheartened with math. Professor Kimball recommends that “if a student does fall behind in class, that student needs to spend more time on learning things as soon as possible” so that the small knowledge gap is not exacerbated when the class moves up to more difficult math concepts. Kimball also advocates introducing concepts to children at an early age. “Ideally, parents should tell kids small math titbits that they will run into later. This gives the children a reassuring sense of familiarity when they finally get to these mathematical concepts in class,” says Kimball. Outside the classroom, Kimball proposes that parents get the series of math books written by Danica McKellar or Isaac Asimov.
Hard Work + 2 Cups of Praise + A Dash of Criticism = Higher Intelligence! Now that we’ve determined that intelligence can be influenced through hard work, it’s also critical to note the importance of both criticism and encouragement in helping your children to strive for better results. A lot of times, parents make the mistake of praising their children’s performance rather than the efforts that they’ve put in, when, in actuality, it should be the other way around! By recognising children’s hard work rather than the result of their hard work, it teaches them that their academic exertions are just as, if not more, important than the outcome. Naturally, children will begin working harder, which translates to higher intelligence and better outcomes not just in their examinations, but in life itself. When it comes to performance, Kimball says, “Parents have to be rigorous when explaining what is correct and what is not. If a child has trouble getting out of a bad academic habit such as procrastination or not taking down notes, it might be appropriate to emphasise how wrong that bad habit is and chide him or her for it, with restraint of course.”
Feb 2014 • Family & Life
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NURTURE
Signs That You A Helicopter Parent
Sometimes, you just have to go against your parental instinct and let your children fall and hurt themselves. Otherwise, you’re just setting them up for an even bigger fall when they grow up. Characteristics of Helicopter Parents Unsure whether you’re a helicopter parent? Here is the checklist of the three most common characteristics displayed by a lot of helicopter parents: • Overscheduling Instead of focusing on developing traits such as self-reliance and perseverance, helicopter parents place great emphasis on developing skills, sending their young child to swimming classes, gymnastics lessons, dance schools, etc. on top of their school schedule. • Hovering at inappropriate places It’s fine to hold your children’s hands while crossing the road or climbing the stairs but following them around as they play at the jungle gym or explore the library is a sign of helicopter parenting. • Personal Playtime Director A helicopter parent will never let the child get bored or play by him or herself. Instead, he or she will direct playtime to such an extent that it might even be at the detriment of his or her own personal time.
We’re sure you’ve heard this term pop up many times before in conversations and articles but what exactly are “helicopter parents”? They are parents who constantly hover over their children and are too eager to step in to remove any obstacle or solve any problem for their children the moment it arises. Helicopter parenting happens as a result of: • more children in the country being brought up in small families, often with only one or no siblings for them to tussle with • two working parents who feel a certain amount of guilt and a need to pamper their child when they are together • a domestic helper who is hired to ensure the child is safe and well Of course, while there is nothing wrong with being a loving, concerned parent, this “over-care and -protection” comes at a cost. Children learn from their mistakes. As a parent, holding back and allowing our children to make mistakes, to fall down or to become frustrated is understandably difficult. We feel compelled to rush in and protect them, to shield them from challenges, and to remove any obstacles for them. Often, we are swooping in because we don’t want to see them upset, as it makes us feel like we’re bad parents. However, in the long run, these only reduce our children’s motivation and increase their dependency on us. After all, children learn by repeating a task until they have mastered it. This helps them hone problem-
solving skills and develops the perseverance and confidence needed to tackle challenges. If we intervene whenever we see them struggle with a challenge, speak up for them in difficult situations or even finish off their homework, we deny them valuable learning experiences and send them the message that we do not believe they are capable of coping or fending for themselves. We also deprive them of the opportunity to experience that sweet taste of success that comes after their hard work has paid off! Ultimately, we rob them of the chance to engage in the most critical task of childhood – developing a strong sense of self. One of the long-term dangers of being a “helicopter parent” when your child is young is that, as they grow older, they are more likely to be extremely cautious in new situations and so afraid of failure that they are not able to try something new or take calculated risks. In his findings, Indiana University psychologist Chris Meno found a connection between helicopter parenting and a difficulty in getting a job after college. These children have an overblown expectation of success and status as well as a heightened level of discomfort with uncertainty. This makes it extremely difficult for them to move into the world, excited about the learning and adventures that lie ahead of them. The research shows a higher number of children with overcontrolling parents return home after college unable to manage on their own. Over-controlling parents are generally motivated by a desire to support and help their child, often by pushing them
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riel Education Photography @ Julia Gab
3
Stop Hovering! By Fiona Walker
ahead of their peer group in order to be more successful. However, based on research, the irony is that the reverse actually occurs; the children become less successful than their peer group in the future. Also, when these children become adults, they are at high risk of developing co-dependency issues (a fixation on another person for approval, sustenance, etc.) and are likely to seek partners who are controlling, just like his or her parents. They may also develop depression, anxiety and irrational fears. The most important gifts we can give our children are independence and confidence. Parents who are reliable, available, consistent and noninterfering develop these skills in their children. It takes courage to step back and watch your child take a risk you know will end up in a bumped knee or bruised ego, but all of these experiences will enable your child to develop the resilience they will need going forward into the world. We want our children to be able to mutter under their breath: “I think I can, I think I can, I think I can”. If we spend too much time hovering over them, or ordering the helper to hover over them they are more likely to be whining, “I can’t do it, I can’t do it, I can’t do it”. As Henry Ford, famously said: “Whether you think you can or whether you think you can’t, you’re probably right”. Fiona Walker is the Principal of Schools / CEO of Julia Gabriel Education. She holds a Masters in Early Childhood Education and is a qualified Montessori teacher with more than 20 years of experience in providing quality education for young children.
Are We Born The Little India riots dramatically placed the spotlight on Singapore’s racial relations, which begets the question: are children born racist or do they learn racism from their parents? Family & Life finds out.
Racist?
8 December 2013 will always be etched in the annals of Singapore’s history as the day an angry mob overturned and set fire to emergency vehicles and squared off against riot police. It was a shocking spectacle that became the topic de jour of many conversations. Two months later, the repercussions of the riots can still be felt today
and probably discussed for future generations to come, especially the concepts of racism and xenophobia. Despite our strict secular policy and the melting pot of cultures and races, Singapore’s racial relations do experience tension. In the future, racial issues could become even more important as our children grow up and grapple with an increasingly borderless world.
Cultural Cues
Racism in Young Children So, is racism inherent in young children? The answer might actually surprise you. According to Professor Gil Diesendruck, who has been studying children and their ways of perceiving the world, the “roots of racism and discrimination towards those different from us” are already surprisingly present in infants.
So, what are these cultural cues? Within the society, there are different groups wielding different kinds of power. For example, in a democratic country, politicians are usually seen as the people with enough power to significantly influence the course of a country. Generally, the majority race in any place tends to hold more power and privileges.
Newborn infants have equal abilities to tell apart people of different races. However, between the ages of five and nine months, psychology researcher Lisa Scott from the University of Massachusetts reveals that infants’ brains experience a decline in their ability to tell apart two faces within another race. Diesendruck explains that it’s all part of natural evolution. “Infants are attracted or have a preference for people who are ‘like them’. This similarity could be in terms of how people look, what they like, or the language they speak, among other things.” According to Assistant Professor Kristina Olson of the University of Washington, this phenomenon can also be seen in adults and is termed the Other Race Effect. “We have less good memory for faces in out-groups (people who are different races, statuses or income levels) and we also tend to think that members of out-groups are more similar to one another”. Of course, this doesn’t actually mean that children are born racist! Rather, it just illustrates that children are biologically predisposed to sort people into groups as a coping mechanism, which could potentially evolve into racism with the help of cultural cues and the right, or shall we say, wrong environmental conditions.
Because of this, Diesendruck shares: “Societies develop cues to distinguish among different kinds of people because of the power distinctions – the power to discriminate in favour of your group and against another in terms of resource distribution, and eventually to justify such discriminations.” As for what becomes a cultural cue, “almost anything that can be readily recognisable works”. Children recognise these cues and behavioural patterns, and as they grow older, they begin to realise that certain qualities bestow different privileges to different groups of people. Interestingly, according to Diesendruck, power may also play a role in why same-race discrimination exists. “For instance, if you are a highstatus leader of a minority, you might be interested in keeping a rigid divide between the minority and the majority so that you don’t lose the ‘relative’ power that you have within the minority community,” says Diesendruck.
Teaching Your Children about Racism “The best time to teach your children about racism is when they start talking about different groups, which usually happens when they’re between four- and five-years-old. One method is to inform children in a respectful manner about the different types of people, explaining to them about the richness of another culture and tradition. At the same time, emphasise how people in one group vary tremendously due to individuality. Finally, talk about how what seem like ‘fixed’ roles of certain types of people may not have anything to do with something inherent in the people as a group, but due to political, cultural and economic factors.” Professor Diesendruck, Department of Psychology and Gonda Brain Research Center, Bar-Ilan University “The most important thing parents can do is actually to interact with diverse people. Having friends with diverse beliefs and backgrounds shows your children that this is normal and good behaviour. On the flipside, if you never have friends from other racial groups, your children might mistakenly assume that you don’t like them. In our studies, we occasionally find that children have made such conclusions simply by inferring who gets invited over for dinner. In addition, it’s useful to discuss with your children the ways in which people are different or similar. It’s better if you talk with them about it, rather than letting them come to their own conclusion.” Assistant Professor of Psychology Kristina Olson, University of Washington Feb 2014 • Family & Life
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HEALTH
It’s the Eye of the Tiger! You’ve been pregnant for a few months and you’re starting to feel like Rocky after he’s gone a few rounds in the ring. We speak to Jacqueline Lee from Pilates Inc. about the benefits of regular exercise for a pregnant mother as well as the different exercises she can do to keep in fighting-fit shape during the pregnancy and after giving birth.
Your feet are bloated, there is a constant ache in your lower back and you keep feeling out of breath. The last thing on your mind is to subject yourself to even more physical exertion as you feel that you’re already getting enough exercise carrying this baby in your womb. Well, banish that thought! Keeping fit during pregnancy helps you to improve your stamina and strength for labour, and might even shorten
WIDE SQUATS Wide squats are great for strengthening the pelvic floor muscles, which support the bowel, bladder, womb and vagina. During pregnancy, these muscles can be overly strained due to the constant weight bearing on them, which might cause stress incontinence (leaking of urine when you sneeze or cough). This can be prevented by regular exercise of the muscles. What to do 1. Put your feet slightly more than shoulderwidth apart with your toes pointing 45 degrees outwards 2. Put your hands on your hips and squat downwards, making sure that
BRIDGE The bridge is a very popular exercise that helps to strengthen the gluteus, hamstrings and core, which are all the important muscles that you’ll use regularly when you’re pregnant.
Keeping fit during pregnancy helps you to improve your stamina and strength for labour. 18
Family & Life • Feb 2014
A key thing to remember when doing the bridge is not to lie in a supine position, as it restricts the flow of oxygen to the baby in the womb because you’re compressing the big blood vessel at your back. Instead, use a wedge (pictured). If a wedge is not available, Jacqueline recommends using pillows!
the time you’re in labour. Also, regular exercise helps you get back into shape after delivery. So, what are some suitable exercises that a pregnant working mother can incorporate into her daily life? Jacqueline Lee, fitness enthusiast, mother of two (and soon three), and director of Pilates Inc., part of The Moving Body Group, demonstrates five exercises that are suitable for mothers, no matter what trimester they’re in.
your back remains straight and your knees don’t go past your toes 3. Once the top of your thighs are parallel to the floor, stop and hold for two seconds before coming back up again 4. Complete eight repetitions 5. For breathing, exhale when you’re going down and inhale when you’re heading up What not to do Remember that you’re not bowing down and working your core, as Jacqueline demonstrates (pictured on left), but rather working your leg and pelvic floor muscles. Doing this might actually hinder the blood and oxygen supply to the baby in your womb, so be careful!
force on your cruciate ligaments (pictured left). Although your body’s natural biomechanical movement does allow your knees to go past your toes (contrary to popular belief that your knees shouldn’t go past your toes when squatting), there will be more weight exerted on your joints now that you’re carrying a newborn, so it’s best not to if your body is not conditioned.
Performing a squat with your knees past your toes exerts more
What to do 1. Place your hands flat at the side, with your tailbone and buttocks on the wedge or pillow 2. Beginning from your tailbone, focus on slowly moving your body off the wedge or pillow until you reach your shoulders, which remain flat on the ground, as pictured in the image below
3. Hold for two seconds before slowly moving your back down, starting from the top 4. Breathe out when you’re moving your back upwards, and breathe in when you’re returning to your starting position
QUADRAPED (also called Bird-dog) Despite being named bird-dog, the exercise doesn’t resemble a bird or a dog. However, it’s a great way to train your shoulders and core, especially the transversus abdominis, the muscles running along the side of your trunk that are vital in helping you give birth. What to do
1. Support yourself with your hands and knees, with your knees directly underneath your hips, your wrists directly underneath your shoulders and your fingers pointing forward 2. Keeping your spine in a neutral position (i.e. no excessive sagging or arching), slowly raise and straighten your left (or right) arm until it’s parallel to the ground 3. Hold it for two seconds before lowering it to your starting position and repeating the same movement with the other arm
SIDE STRETCH
(with rotation)
The side stretch is an effective way to lengthen the muscles in between your ribs and can be done whether you’re sitting on your office chair or relaxing on the couch at home. Besides making you feel relaxed and great, regular side stretches also help you breathe better and more effectively in the long run, and there’ll be lots of breathing when you’re giving birth!
1. Before you stretch, make sure your weight is equally spread across your bottom 2. Starting from your left side, move your left hand upwards and then bend to the right while looking straight forward 3. Breathe deeply into the stretch, hold it for two seconds and return to the starting position 4. Repeat for your right side
ROTATOR CUFF EXTERNAL ROTATION Another great exercise to loosen those hunched shoulders and make them stronger for carrying babies is the rotator cuff external rotation movement. Although this can be done without any exercise tools, Jacqueline recommends using a resistance band (pictured), which adds, as the name implies, more resistance and gives you more of a workout. This is another great exercise that can be done when you’re sitting on your office chair.
1. Before starting, ensure your weight is spread evenly across your bottom, then pull on the resistance band apart with your hands until just slightly lesser than shoulderwidth apart 2. Make sure your neck muscles are also relaxed 3. Maintaining the distance between your two hands, move the band upwards and above your head, then going down behind your back 4. Stop the band just below your neck at the shoulder blades
4. If you would find the above exercise too easy and would like something more advanced, try lifting both your arm and leg simultaneously until they are parallel to the ground
5. Hold for two seconds before going back in the opposite direction you came from to return to the starting position 6. This exercise opens up your chest and works the deltoids, one of the muscles that will be heavily used when you’re carrying your newborn
5. Remember to lift opposite parts or you’ll lose your balance (lift right arm and left leg together; lift left arm and right leg together) 6. At all times, keep your head and neck in a straight line with your spine
A variation of the side stretch that Jacqueline recommends for pregnant mothers includes a rotation, which trains the shoulders for the future, when you’ll be carrying your baby. 1. After you’ve reached up and stretched to the side, move your shoulder on the side of the stretch forward and slightly down (i.e. if you’re stretching your left side, move your left shoulder forward) 2. You’ll feel the stretch at your rotator cuff, great relief for shoulders that are continually hunched at the desk
RULES AND GUIDELINES Exercising while pregnant is generally safe and even recommended by doctors. However, here are a few rules and guidelines that you should bear in mind while beginning any physical activity. Also, as always, check with your physician or gynaecologist when you’re unsure about your exercise routine. • As a general rule, you should be able to carry a conversation while exercising • Always drink water before, during and after any exercise routine • Before exercising, empty your bladder as the increased pressure might cause urine leakages • Avoid using your heart rate to measure the intensity of your exercise
Feb 2014 • Family & Life
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HEALTH
Post-Natal Tress By Jade Tan
Female hair loss is a touchy subject that is rarely talked about. After all, balding only affects the men right? We talk to a trichologist from Phyto Hair Science to find out more about female hair loss, especially how it affects new mothers.
Hair
After the initial euphoria of the new baby wears off, mothers often have to grapple with a few bodily issues. One of the common problems that most new Mums face is drastic hair loss. Before you self-diagnose this ailment as a case of using the wrong hair care products, read on. Usually, chemical processes and hair care products wrongfully take the fall for our thinning tresses. Why wrongfully? Well, the average person loses between 50 and 100 strands of hair daily and while some harsh products and treatments might cause hair breakage, they are often not responsible for sudden hair shedding. Neither does frequent shampooing, as long as it is done with a gentle hand.
Skin Surface
Old Hair
Secondary germ cells Club Hair
Anagen
Dermal Papilla
Catagen
3-5 years
1-2 weeks
Telogen 2-4 months
Active Growth Phase
Transition Phase
Resting Phase
Permanent hair loss occurs during the active growth stage
Hair begins to move towards skin pore while the papilla begins to separate from follicle
Papilla completely separates from hair follicles
Usually, chemical processes and hair care products wrongfully take the fall for our thinning tresses. 20
Family & Life • Feb 2014
Hair Matrix forming new hair
Anagen Return to Anagen Stage
Papilla moves up to meet the hair follicles so that the hait matrix can form new hair
Distress
Instead, sparse locks, pre- or postpregnancy, are more likely to be due to hormonal fluctuations, nutrient deficiency, skin conditions, genetics or excessive stress being applied on hair roots. Postpartum, it is common for women to experience a condition known as telogen effluvium (TE), which occurs during periods of extreme hormonal changes such as childbirth. To understand the role TE plays in post-natal hair loss, it’s important to understand the three stages that make up your hair growth cycle. The Hair Growth Cycle The three phases are: • Anagen This is the growing stage and between 85 and 90 percent of your hair will be in this phase at any one time. Your hair strands actively grow for two to six years during this period before it goes into the second phase. • Catagen After the anagen phase, your hair transitions into the catagen stage, which lasts for one to three weeks. Your hair strand stops growing during this period. Only up to one percent of the hair on your scalp is in the catagen phase at any one time. • Telogen The final stage is the telogen phase. During this period, your hair strands remain attached to the scalp for one to four months until the end, when a new hair strand pushes the old hair out of the follicle. 10 to 15 percent of your hair is in this phase at any point in time.
How does TE affect my hair? During pregnancy, the high levels of oestrogen in the body reduce the percentage of hair that enters the Telogen phase. This means that during the pregnancy term, hair that would have fallen out remains attached to the scalp. Post-pregnancy, the decline in oestrogen levels allows old hair to fall out, resulting in drastic hair fall up to four times the norm. So while it may be scary to see clumps of your precious locks coming away on your brush or in the shower, bear in mind that it’s hormones at work and not the result of a poor diet or hair products – all that hair was supposed to fall out anyway! Post-natal hair loss as a result of TE becomes noticeable two to three months after child delivery and usually lasts between six and 12 months. Its effects may be amplified by the physical and mental trauma, blood loss and medication
STYLE TIPS! Waiting for new hair to grow takes a considerable length of time since it grows at an average of 1.2 cm a month. Below are some styling tips that will help you make the most of what you have! • Change your parting Hair thins the most at your chosen parting, so flipping it over will help to cover up the bare patches. • Let your hair down Tying your hair up can tug at the roots of your hair, which causes more hair to fall out. If you have to keep your hair up, change the height of your ponytail each time so that you don’t always exert the same amount of pressure on the same strands. • Amp it up Go for voluminous styles (think waves, curls, even crimps!) instead of sleek styles that emphasise thinness. • Take a short cut Give more density to your hair by chopping it all off if you dare! Long hair is prone to breakage since the lower half of your hair is drier. • Keep your cut blunt Layers make your hair look thinner, so ditch them. Many women shed more extensively in the front, at their hairline, so bangs are a great choice since they give your hair more body where you need it most.
that comes with childbirth. However, be rest assured that you will regain your crowning glory after all that old hair has been shed! What can I do to prevent excessive hair loss? Phyto Hair Science, one of Singapore’s leading trichologists, explains: “Eating a well-balanced diet, having sufficient quality rest, using hair tonic and doing scalp treatments are some measures to alleviate hair shedding.” A well-balanced diet includes foods rich in Vitamins B, E, C, zinc and biotin, which helps your strands to withstand breakage. To speed up hair growth, choose shampoos that contain biotin and silica. As for managing the stress that comes with childbirth, it’s a good idea to practise Positive Psychology or meditation to keep stress levels in check.
Frozen in Time Singapore’s ageing population problems are well-documented and there have been many debates regarding the best ways to increase the birth rate. One of the methods include ethically controversial egg freezing.
Rarely highlighted in the Singaporean media, the egg freezing process is slowly gaining prominence in many countries around the world. Two of the main reasons why egg freezing is entering the public consciousness are: • Advancements in the medical industry that have made the process safer and with higher rates of success • The giant strides that women have made in the corporate world While the first reason is self-explanatory, the second reason, when taken at face value, might seem unrelated to the increasing popularity of egg freezing. However, dig a little deeper and the implications are quite clear – as women invest more and more of their time and energies at work, naturally, other life choices often take a backseat, like marriage and starting a family. The first successful case of a human pregnancy using frozen eggs was reported in 1986 by Dr Christopher Chen of Australia. More than two decades later, it is estimated that there have been between 300,000 and 500,000 successful human births using frozen eggs, with numbers expected to rise exponentially in the next few decades due to lifestyle choices and longer life expectancies.
In Singapore, egg freezing or oocyte cryopreservation is only allowed under two circumstances: 1. During the in-vitro fertilisation (IVF) process, under certain circumstances (e.g. if the wife is Five Easy waiting for a sperm donor) Steps to Egg 2. Clinically-indicated reasons to Freezing preserve their fertility before undergoing therapy which impairs Step One: Select your preferred hospital or egg bank. At the moment, most hospitals in or may impair their reproductive Singapore offer facilities for egg freezing. health (e.g. chemotherapy) Step Two: Your gynaecologist evaluate your ovarian reserve or egg quality to determine what medications will work best for you and whether egg freezing is an appropriate, safe choice. Step Three: You will receive hormone injections that will aid your body in producing multiple eggs. Then, within the next 12 days, you will undergo blood tests and ultrasound scanning to monitor the growth of your eggs. After the eggs almost reach maturity, you will receive another hormone injection to ripen the eggs. Step Four: Your gynaecologist will retrieve the eggs transvaginally from your ovary using an ultrasound-guided needle. No abdominal incision is needed.
A woman who opts to freeze her eggs and meets either one of the two circumstances is also required to be below the age of 45 (a woman above 45 would not be allowed to freeze her eggs since she is unable to go through the IVF procedure). Unfortunately, at the moment, egg freezing cannot be carried out in Singapore for elective or social reasons.
Step Five: Once the eggs have been successfully retrieved, the embryologist will remove any adhering cells before One of the major stumbling freezing them, either using the conventional slow blocks to the egg freezing freezing technique or the vitrification technique. procedure is its cost. Since According to Dr Ethiraj Bala, Chief Embryologist of frozen eggs can only be rethe Thomson Fertility Centre, “vitrification yields inserted into a woman’s body better survival of eggs after freezing and thawing than slow freezing”. through IVF, the costs incurred can
range between S$10,000 and S$12,000, based on current IVF charges. There is also a minor risk present when using high doses of hormones for producing eggs. “Some women may experience potential complications from hormonal stimulation and procedure of egg retrieval, such as ovarian hyperstimulation syndrome which may require hospitalisation, and other risks related to the procedure. However, thus far, literature on babies born from frozenthawed eggs has not shown any health complications different from those born from natural conception,” Dr Bala says. There have also been newer reports emerging in the scientific community that pregnancy rates using frozen eggs are comparable to fresh embryos, affirming how far cryopreservation technology has advanced. As for the maximum safe period of egg storage, doctors have divided opinions. Most medical professionals agree that eggs can be safely frozen up to ten years while a few believe that the eggs can be stored indefinitely without suffering any deterioration in quality. It is important to note, however, that normally, eggs from younger women survive better than those from older women. Now, the most important question Singapore faces is whether or not egg freezing should be allowed for social reasons such as overcoming age-related fertility loss. Supporters in the “for egg freezing” camp categorically state that egg freezing is one effective way for Singapore to overcome its declining, aging citizen population while those who oppose egg freezing are concerned about the medical, religious and possible social implications. According to a report published by BELRIS, a think-tank based in Singapore that funds research addressing the controversial ethics brought about by the advances in reproductive technology, “concerns on the legalisation of elective egg freezing include the commodification of women’s bodies, a consumerist approach to medicine, and the changing image of an ‘ideal’ family”. Already, countries such as the USA, Belgium and Netherlands permit social egg freezing while Israel has classified age-related fertility decline has a medical condition. So, it is only a matter of time before Singapore must also decide on her stance for egg freezing. Feb 2014 • Family & Life
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RELAX
The Overall 2014 Outlook By Ken Koh
2014 is the Year of the and is Wood Horse expressed by way of two elements namely Wood over the element of Fire (as represented by the Horse). This is the chart of the Year of the Wood Horse in 2014.
For reasons of understanding the year in focus, we shall analyse the two elements as represented by the year, which in this case is Yang Wood over the Horse (expressed as Yin Fire). In the cycle of production amongst the five elements, Wood produces Fire which should point to a year of harmony and positive results. However, unique to this relationship, the Wood character is one of unshakable inner strengths, stubborn and unyielding with a dual personality of conflicting decisions. Yang Wood can also be visualized as a huge tree under a blazing sun, cracking under pressure but unwilling to give up. Yang Wood is also very territorial. If this situation is robbed of Water, the Wood will not survive besides having the need for earth to take root. In this year’s chart, Water and Earth is missing. As a result, this can mean a conflict situation involving Yin Fire over water and earth. Tensions and accidents in the seas over space or land are likely scenarios where fire-power, explosions and fire break-outs will be evident. In 2013, the Water Snake year was one of unsuspecting occurrences such as sudden policies, the haze situation, the dengue outbreak, CHC saga, sex scandals and the Little India riots. Going forward, 2014 will be filled with dogmatic standpoints and fighting for rights. Because it is starved of Water and Earth, wisdom and authority will be redundant. Serious conflicts on the world map thus cannot be ruled out.
Yang Wood sits in the Heavenly Stem which is explicitly connected to the liver and the head. It is responsible for growth and immunity. In 2014, injuries to the head and immunity issues will take centre-stage. 2014 will also bring about liaisons of passionate encounters. However, it is also a year when emotional instability may rule the heart. One has to be careful, especially if the relationship is a passing fling which can lead to a lot of troubles. The strong Fire energies of the Horse will also lead to health problems affecting the heart, eyes and blood. Strong Fire will also render the Metal to be weak. Metal relates to the head, lungs and skin and thus, health alerts could be raised over breathing or skin outbreaks. February, June and October are the months of Tiger, Horse and Dog respectively and will add more Fire, forming flashpoints for gunfights, fire disasters and volcanic eruptions. Due to the lack of water in 2014, forest fires and air pollution will be more prevalent. In summary, expect lots of above board actions that will stir emotions and drive impulse exchanges. The Horse year also brings about great entertainment and contributes to a feel-good atmosphere; people feel more relaxed and comfortable in spilling the beans. As the year is fraught with open uncertainty, we should all prepare and arm ourselves with moderation. The year is predicted to have success, but only in short spurts. Celebrate when there is a reason and 2014 will prove to be a fruitful one.
Your 2014 Fortunes Ken Koh of the House of Feng Shui shares with us the outlook for the different animals in the upcoming Year of the Horse.
The year is predicted to have success, but only in short spurts. Celebrate when there is a reason and 2014 will prove to be a fruitful one. 22
Family & Life • Feb 2014
RAT There is no need to fear the Horse clashing into the Rat if you are born as a Rat. Your optimism stems from the confidence of your past success but you will need to embrace the challenges ahead. You may experience disagreements with those around you who may, ironically, also contribute to your success. You can also expect a broad impact in your life, such as someone leaving or coming into your life, a shift in lifestyle or a change of environment. Other people’s opinions of you may also shift but
there is no concern if you stay positive and on the right track. There will also be competitors and critics trying to undermine your best efforts, this can be overcome with support from those who share your dreams and worries. 2014 is a turning point for most Rats. You can choose to complain about how tough life has been or dust off the worries to claim your pole position for the best of the next six years. This comes in the form of a clear head, the discipline to achieve and the willingness to bring others along on the success story.
OX Be prepared for followers and supporters to switch camps in 2014. It’s an opportunity to clean up as long as you remove your emotions from the process. You will experience
disagreements and family conflicts, both of which will get in the way of your career and relationships. Instead of suffering in silence, which could be harmful, open up and seek help.
things around. Do not buckle in the face of troubles or adversity. Instead, courageously confront these issues and solve them independently, instead of looking at them as part of a big picture.
Wealth and career opportunities turn modest in 2014. To get the best out of the year, some “divine intervention” and good timing become crucial to your success. Fortunately, you get two of the best stars in the constellation to help you turn things to your advantage. You’ll just need to take care of matters of conflicts. Keep a positive outlook as events that are seemingly unfavourable may just be the turning point to something very beneficial due to the presence of the Dragon Virtue Star.
Children and people in educational or consultancy businesses will advance or achieve breakthroughs in their respective pursuits. Others who wish to take advantage of this energy may embark on a selfimprovement program. RABBIT You are a magnet for positive outcomes and success in 2014. With several stars shining your way, multiply your good fortunes by giving and receiving. The Fortune Virtue Star brings you a Noble Help who recognises your abilities. This means that you cannot ignore or suspect a proposal from a distant boss. Moreover, this star also offers you lots of help from friends and family members as well as partnerships. Combined with the Heavenly Virtue Star, you will have the Midas touch in all you do.
TIGER The Great Killing Star dominates your actions in 2014 and all Tigers should be mindful of their decisions. Do not make a decision when you are emotional and do not make a commitment when you are happy. Impatience and pride over principles will lead you to misery, so strengthen your discipline. 2014 offers you a world of opportunities only if you adopt an open mind. Offload the excess and emotional baggage if you want progress in your life and relationships. Tigers must watch their words, oral and written, as they may be provoked into issuing strong statements that can lead to libel or legal issues. You will do well with support and advice from an authority, trusted friends and family members. The good news is that you will be given a fair chance to achieve if you set a timeline for your goals. June and October are times of great performances from you that will yield the best returns. In areas of finances and investment, avoid the wild speculations. Break the year into bite-sized pieces and take frequent timeoffs to recharge and change perspectives. This will help shape your success in areas of work and businesses if you are involved in non-sales-related activities.
Unfortunately, you will also attract disruptions and gossip from jealous competitors. Left to their own designs, they may create havoc by spreading false information and malicious rumours of your work and personal life. While it helps to be kind towards others, it is hard work sieving out your true friends from the imposters. Start the year right with a solid plan and gather your army of supporters to benefit from the months of April, July, November and December.
DRAGON You would probably not be sleeping too much and it’s not because of worries on your mind. It is quite the opposite as 2014 is an exciting year of challenges that will result in unexpected benefits. Two Relief Stars are in your favour and this points to an ability to turn
Married males may face problems involving women and dragons, in general, will encounter relationship woes. Those born in 1964 and 1976 should restrain from being too adventurous. Problems may also arise in the months of August and September when you are out of the house in the wee hours of the night.
SNAKE This year, you get a chance to weave your magic into the hearts of those you care for. Thinking differently will also feed your enthusiasm and creativity. You will experience high success rates if you are upgrading yourself academically or are pursuing a new interest. Snakes who are in professions such as public performing, public relations, advertising, sales and marketing will experience great productivity and output. It will be a busy year for you, so it becomes more important for you to plan your time and goals. Do not lose sight of your ability to convert opportunities into success as you are prone to giving up without a good fight. You will experience anxiety and feel inferior when you look at the success of others. However, it should not concern you. If there is one thing to be concerned with, it is the presence of the Officer Charm Star, which leads to legal issues and official offences. Start by making sure your obligations are fulfilled. Then, do not make your opinions public and even if you are an active participant, avoid groups that voice opposition towards mainstream policies. In short, do not argue. It is going to be a long year, so be prudent, work smart, say less and stay focused on your achievements.
HORSE You may hear that 2014 is your “clash year” and thus will be a tough year. Yes, there is some truth to that but here is the good news. There is the Golden Lock Star, which brings you stellar financial gains. Then, there is the General Star that connects you to people with the right links who will help you to achieve your goals in double-quick time. This translates into financial returns and if you’re gainfully employed, pay increases. Bonuses and commissions should continue to flow in if you work hard and deploy your plans well. This also means that 2014 is a time for you to pick up bargain investments or new investing skills. Having said this, be prepared to be thrown off the tracks from time to time. Watch out for February, June and November when things may not happen the way you like them. Keep an open mind and accept the bumps while looking out for people who are offering a helping hand. Between the months of April and September, you may also create rifts in your relationships with loved ones and close friends; your anxiety and need for instant changes can drive people nuts. Moderate your goals and remember that you will still need your support from them.
GOAT After years of dark clouds, the skies are clearing up just for you in 2014. Business prospects, career promotions, relationships and Feb 2014 • Family & Life
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financial matters will be in your favour while your neighbours wonder how you do it. If you do not allow your past and pride to get in the way, 2014 will be stellar for you. In spite of your winning streak, Goats have to contend with their emotional consideration for others. The trick is not to be too attached to things and people. The Horse year could also attract you lots of admirers and competitors hiding in the bushes. Goats born in 1967, especially females, will experience a false sense of security and should buffer for disappointments in areas of career and business in the middle of the year. Males born in 1979 must be aware of partnership deals that sound too good to be true. Do not fall for get-rich-quick schemes. Given your sensitivity, relationships can be a mixed bag of fortunes. While there are chances for influential people to lift you out of your financial troubles, you tend to turn away good offers due to prejudice against groups that you suspect. Family matters are also a matter of concern as Goats get carried away with unwanted liaisons and friendships that can strain a good marriage. Moreover, Goats have to be sensitive towards children’s need for attention.
MONKEY The Sky Horse Star speeds up results for Monkeys in 2014. Coupled with travelling, your opportunities to enter new markets and foster new contacts grow exponentially. This can result in good finances if you concentrate on making your career and your business grow. Another condition for success is for you to remain true and faithful to the cause of your work. If you are a service provider, offer your expertise, time and efforts. If you market a product, never cut corners. The right thing for you to do this year is to get into focus groups and concentrate on product development or service upgrades. Business people should also invest time, money and efforts into research and development. 2014 is a good time for expansion, both personally and as a business. 24
Family & Life • Feb 2014
Females born in 1968 will come to a crossroad, choosing between running her business and continuing work. This is a good year for you to strike it out. Males born the same year may not have that opportunity and should continue his career, but chances for a shift to a better company exists. The 1980 Monkey could run into financial problems if they are not careful. They should not listen to tips and borrow money only to blow it all away in risky investments and partnerships. Ladies born in 1992 might be lured into promises of glamour and fame. Overall, Monkeys are prone to being led astray and being cheated. You should not hope for easy money. Instead, your financials need to be properly planned as you will meet bumps in months of February, May, June, August and October. Do not waste money on lotteries this year.
ROOSTER Money earned through wisdom and clear thoughts will be the highlight for Roosters in 2014. It is also a year for great relationships, joint ventures and progress in life. Your image as an individual will be greatly elevated and because of this, people with influence, status and official standing will be there for you when you need them. Keep your intentions and decisions grounded and do not be influenced by close friends and family members into an investment or deal that you are uncomfortable with. Learn to say No”. This is the year for you to advertise your talents and showcase your social skills. The lost opportunities that slipped past in the last two years will be revisiting you and you must take hold of this time to make a breakthrough, especially if you are seeking higher office, a promotion or a business stake. The Hook Spirit Star can cause confusion and panic, which might
2014 will also bring about liaisons of passionate encounters. However, it is also a year when emotional instability may rule the heart 2014 will also bring about liaisons of passionate encounters. However, it is also a year when emotional instability may rule the heart.
result in you making a decision on impulse that will only end negatively. You have to be wary of a man in his 40s who is intent on cornering you into a deal or parting with your money through a deal, franchise or investment. Separate your personal relationship from business or official ones or you may end up compromising on your own values and dignity.
DOG Two intellectual stars, Earth Relief and Elegant Seal, crank up your reasoning powers and analytical skills. It is not about how educated you are but how well you deal with life’s challenges and turn them into opportunities that count for success. 2014 presents its fair share of chances that only those born in Dog years know how to convert into useful benefits.
are not spared if there are some legal documents that they may need to be part of or involved in as a party.
PIG 2014 is a rather fortunate year for Pigs. Have faith that things, however bad it may seem, will be mitigated. The tides will eventually turn in your favour. If you do not take people and things for granted, this year will surely bring you enough goodies to celebrate. Your current relationships will also be turning the corner and past misunderstandings will be mended. For singles born in 1983 and 1995, it is the perfect time for you to socialise and find suitable partners who can take you into the next serious phase of your life.
In addition, you will experience improved conditions at work and business, which will boost your bottomline. The 1958 males will find a way towards a better and more stable work condition, ensuring their continuity at work for several more years. The 1970 Dog should be looking for opportunities to increase their employability and upgrade their skills.
It is time for you to draw up a plan with a time-line that will help you achieve your goals this year, as they are within grasp, but only if you practice visualising your success while maintaining a positive outlook. The problem is that once you achieve something, you will want more and will start to expect unrealistic results. Moderation is crucial.
Females born in 1970 and 1982 must be extra careful when dealing with documents and representing the company that they work for. The months of March and June are times that you are prone to legal issues that may involve contractual assignments with suppliers and clients alike. As such, you need to be careful with paperwork. Unfortunately, the rest
While it may be a busy year full of travel, do not neglect your own wellbeing. Health-wise, you must look into problems involving fatigue and head troubles. Another concern is that an elderly person at home may be facing a health issue of his own and you should monitor his condition and spend time with him to make him feel more comfortable.
Cooking Up a Valentine’s Day is approaching. Dispense with the typical restaurant dinner where your elbows are wrestling for space with another couple at the table beside you. Bring the chef home instead.
L ve Storm As Valentine’s Day approaches, many husbands and fathers hastily begin making dinner arrangements, for to let this day pass without any gesture of love on their part is the catalyst for an unhappy bedroom. It is also the time of the year when restaurant owners and florists grin widely while listening to the continuous tune of ringing cash registers. Instead of plonking your hard-earned money on a forgettable dinner at a restaurant packed to the brim
PERSONAL HOME CHEF SINGAPORE Founded by Sawarto John Widjaja, a culinary chef with more than a decade of experience working in the kitchen and alongside Michelin-starred chefs such as Christophe Bacquie and Loris Pistillo, Personal Home Chef Singapore hopes to bring the magic of good dining and even better food to homes all across Singapore. They focus on classic and modern French cuisine with an Asian twist, and with the massive number of credentials and achievements that they have racked up, including cooking for Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong and President Tony Tan, Personal Home Chef Singapore has certainly left its culinary mark on Singapore.
Valentine’s Special Menu S$600 a couple, including one on-site chef and one service butler Amuse Bouche Hokkaido Scallops with Avocado and Mango Salsa Starter Smoked Pepper Crusted Duck Breast with Cumin Scented Garbanzo, Orange Jus Beets, Edamame and Truffle Vinaigrette Soup Potage Parmentier with Caramelised Wild Angka Prawn Main 4-hour Slow Cooked Merlot Wagyu Beef Cheeks OR Roasted Chilean Snapper Both with Glazed Potato Cocotte and Garniture of Chef’s Handpicked Greens Dessert Poached Peckham Pear with Tonga Vanilla, Citrus Sorbet and Cocoa Cigar
with other couples, why not use your cash to create a romantic memory that will be cherished in the years to come instead? Have the same wonderful dinner in the comfort of your own home, whipped up by your very own personal chef (at least for a few hours). We’ve scoured the island and bring to you the best Valentine’s Day dinner packages that can be created from your home kitchen.
TIM’S FINE CATERING SERVICES Tim Meijers arrived in Singapore with big dreams and a mind honed by years of experience working in numerous Michelin-starred, fine dining restaurants all across the world. After working with the renowned Saint Pierre restaurant in Singapore for two and a half years, Tim decided to branch out and start his own company, bringing an outstanding fine dining experience to your home, at work or just about anywhere you can think of. For Valentine’s Day this year, Tim decided to do something a bit different. Instead of cooking for the couple, the Dutch chef is organising cooking classes as well as a pre-cooked four-course dinner, complete with instructions on how to finish the dishes, which gives participants a taste of what it is like to be a fine dining chef. Cooking Classes Held in a professional kitchen, couples will prepare a fivecourse menu on their own with guidance from the chef. At the end of the session, you will get to enjoy the meal you cooked together, toasting your success with complimentary glasses of champagne.
Pre-cooked Valentine’s Day Dinner Young and Innocent Slow-cooked Salmon with Green Pea Mousse, Baby Radish, Young Potato and Sugar Snaps Love is in the Air Miso-braised Cod Fish with Tomato Bouillon and Vegetable Pearls Love is Just Love Slow-braised Lamb Shoulder with Pesto, Tomato Confit and Rainbow Ratatouille Beautiful Swan Lake Crispy Meringue with Lemon Yoghurt, Strawberry Soup and Mint Pesto
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RELAX
Singapore’s
Best Kept S cret
Farm-fresh produce, delicious value, and a feast fit for a king at pauper prices; these are all possible during this Chinese New Year period. We let you in on one of our best kept secrets when it comes to smart grocery shopping.
Deep in the Tampines suburbs lies one (or perhaps three) of Singapore’s best kept supermarket secrets, a treasure trove of value-for-money groceries suitable for Chinese New Year. Gems such as this rarely remain undiscovered for long though and now that we’re at the start of Chinese New Year, we thought it would be a great idea to reveal to you one of our favourite family supermarkets.
Avoid the crowds and journey to YES Supermarket to pick out the ingredients you need for your next family dinner. While most supermarkets jack up their prices during this festive season, YES (which stands for “Your Everyday Store”) believes in the maxim of value and letting its items speak for themselves, while always putting the consumer first and foremost in every decision they make.
Creating a Delightful CNY Meal Instead of going to pricey, mediocre restaurants for your Chinese New Year dinners with friends and family, why not create a dinner that will be talked about until the next Chinese New Year? Thanks to YES, we’ve put together a six-course meal suitable for 10 people that comes in at less than S$100! First Course: Luo Han Zhai (Buddha’s Delight) A vegetarian dish, the Buddha’s Delight is an auspicious dish to have on the first day of Chinese New Year to symbolise selfpurification. It’s Ingredients includes dried beancurd sticks, black fungus, Ginkgo nuts, lily buds &Fa cai (or black moss) Estimated price: S$12.30 ••••••••••
and happiness, which is what everybody wishes for in the New Year. Priding itself on its freshness, YES has you covered with its ocean-fresh grey prawns, a mainstay in any seafood dish. Estimated price: S$16.90 •••••••••• Fourth course: Stir-fried Leeks with Vegetables Leeks are a popular vegetable during Chinese New Year because a part of its Chinese name 蒜苗 sounds a lot like “calculating” in Mandarin, which is regarded as an auspicious symbol for wealth (lots of money coming in that you’ll need to calculate) . Of course, just having
Second Course: Braised Mushrooms with Abalone The Chinese name of abalone is 鲍鱼, which bears the same auspicious meaning as 年年包有余 (assurance of a surplus in the year ahead), one of the reasons why this is a highly coveted item during this period. Estimated price: S$30 •••••••••• Third Course: XO Sauce Prawns The sound “ha” in Cantonese or other Chinese dialects for prawns symbolises laughter 26
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leeks in the dish can get boring, so grab some other vegetables, which go for less than S$5! Estimated price: S$5.50 (for 1 kg of leek) •••••••••• Fifth course: Snow Fungus Soup Often cooked during this period, Snow Fungus Soup or Tang Shui tastes sweet, which symbolises sweet blessings. Depending on your family’s palate, you can choose either black fungus or its slightly cheaper cousin, the white fungus. Estimated price: S$5 ••••••••••
Final course: Steamed Fish or Salmon Sashimi Everyone’s favourite seafood is one of the mainstays during this period because it is both delicious and auspicious. Fish is a symbol of prosperity and leaving a few pieces behind during dinner signifies impending wealth during the New Year. Estimated price: S$28.25 •••••••••• Amazingly, this six-course dinner for 10 people clocks in at an amazing value price of S$97.95, so go ahead and snap up all the items before they’re all gone!
Yu Sheng
What’s a Chinese New Year dinner without Yu Sheng? Incomplete, that’s what! Instead of getting store-bought Yu Sheng, we suggest creating your very own platter. Besides being healthier, you can also dictate the ingredients you want to put in your plate of Prosperity Toss to cater to everyone’s taste, instead of resigning yourself to limp, cold vegetables. YES has everything you require for your Yu Sheng to rise to the top. Here’s what you need (and what they symbolise): Raw fish
年年有余 (Nian Nian You Yu) Abundance and excess through the year
Pomelo
大吉大利 (Da Ji Da Li) Good luck and smooth sailing
Pepper
招财进宝 (Zhao Cai Jing Bao) Attract wealth and treasures
Oil / Sauce
财源广进 (Cai Yuan Guang Jing) Numerous sources of wealth
Carrots
鸿运当头 (Hong Yun Dang Tou) Good luck is approaching
Green Radish
青春常驻 (Qing Chun Chang Zhu) Eternal youth.
White Radish
风生水起 (Feng Sheng Shui Qi) & 步步高升 (Bu Bu Gao Sheng) Prosperity in business & promotion at work
Peanut crumbs
金银满屋 (Jin Yin Man Wu) A household filled with gold and silver.
Sesame seeds
生意兴隆 (Sheng Yi Xing Long) A flourishing business
Deep-fried flour crisps In the shape of golden pillows, the crackers (Pok Chui Crackers) represent 满地黄金 (Man Di Huang Jin), which symbolises having the whole floor filled with gold
Discover our favourite supermarket at the following locations Head office @ Blk 201B Tampines St 21 #02-1093, Singapore 522201 • Blk 201B Tampines St 21 #01-1091, Singapore 522201 • Blk 138 Tampines St 11 #01-108/110, Singapore 520138 • Blk 829 Tampines St 81 #01-272, Singapore 520829 • YES Market Place @ Tampines Mart,
• Hougang CC, 35 Hougang Avenue 3, Singapore 538840 or online at www.yes.com.sg!
9 Tampines St 32 Singapore 529285
1999 YES Supermarket opens its doors to the public for the first time at Blk 829 Tampines Street 82.
2004 As the store's popularity grows, the public begin clamouring for a second store. Finally, the second outlet opens at Blk 201B Tampines Street 21.
2011 Now that YES has become one of the recognisable landmarks of Tampines, it looks westward and opens a third store at 35 Hougang Avenue 3.
2012 YES opens its fourth outlet at Blk 138 Tampines Street 11, strengthening its position as the supermarket of choice for Tampines residents.
2014 and beyond YES is formulating plans to move towards the other heartlands of Singapore, providing an alternative to savvy consumers looking for fresh value and even fresher produce! Feb 2014 • Family & Life
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BITES
Tomato Gazpacho White Prawns
&
At Family & Life, we believe that cooking can, and should be, a family affair! This Chinese New Year month, we present a prosperous red cuisine with a Mexican twist.
It is the period for house visits and feasting, which is why we are happy to collaborate with fine dining personal chef Tim Meijers for this reddish (for prosperity!), easy-to-create starter that will be great for small gatherings or large family groups. Also, besides being delicious, the sautéed garlic prawns symbolise laughter and happiness, so it’s the perfect auspicious accompaniment at the start of the Year of the Horse. The best part: this dish is incredibly healthy and a welcome respite from the savoury and oily fare such that predominates many Chinese households during this period. Your children can help to blend all the ingredients together after you have finished cutting the vegetables that go into the gazpacho or tomato-based vegetable soup. While that is being blended, you can get to work grilling the happy prawns. Have fun with this recipe during Chinese New Year and do share your auspicious photos with us!
SERVES: 4 people DEGREE OF DIFFICULTY: Easy PREPARATION TIME: 15 minutes TOTAL COOKING TIME: 5 minutes
INGREDIENTS Whole (preferably live) white prawns �������������12 Roma tomatoes �����������1 kg Garlic cloves ���������������� 3 Red chilli ������������ 0.5 ABOUT THE CHEF Tim Meijers is a globe-trotting chef Water ������ 150 ml of experience with more than a decade Salt and lemon juice..... To taste working in Michelin-starred fine dining restaurants. He came to Singapore three years ago and worked for Saint Pierre before starting Tim’s Fine Catering Services, bringing the luxury of fine dining to offices and homes all over the island.
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MATERIALS Blender Frying pan Knife Chopping Board Soup plate Skewers
PREPARATIONS Gazpacho 1. Cut the tomatoes into quarters 2. Remove the seeds from the red chilli 3. Remove the skin from the onion and cut the onion into quarters 4. Clean the garlic 5. Prepare the blender and blend the following ingredients for 10 minutes: a. 1 kg Roma tomatoes b. 3 garlic cloves c. 0.5 red chilli d. 0.5 white onion e. 150 ml water 6. Season with salt and lemon juice Prawns 1. Remove the heads of the prawns 2. Remove the shell of the prawns, which can be easily done by gently breaking it lose at the belly 3. Cut the prawn in half horizontally and remove the vein in the middle 4. Pan fry the prawns on very high heat with a tiny bit of oil 5. After letting them cool down, stick them with the skewers
EVENTS
WH? T’S
PROJECT LEE DAI SOH EXHIBITION
HAPPENING RAPUNZEL The classic fairy tale by the Brothers Grimm is given the lustrous treatment by The Little Company for the 2014 season! Youn Young Park and Susannah Pearsehas have created a fun and witty new play with music for the two- to six-year-olds. Get tangled up in this musical fairy tale with a twist, and join Rapunzel as she embarks on a journey of selfdiscovery, helped by her zany friends Montague the Prince and his sidekick Chester the Camel, Hugo the Cactus, and Harriet the Bird. Along the way, Esme the Witch, who has kept Rapunzel a prisoner in a lonely tower, also learns a lesson or two about friendship and love. Director Lotte Wakeham promises lots of fun adventures, singing, hair, talking animals and a mysterious few surprises. So, bring your family along to enjoy this “hair-raising” musical play!
Where: DBS Arts Centre When: 14 March 2014 to 27 April 2014 Price: From S$22 on weekdays and S$32 on weekends Watch the show as a family of four and you get to enjoy a special discount.
Perhaps one of the most recognised names amongst the older generation in Singapore, Mr Lee Dai Soh was one of the most popular Cantonese storytellers on radio in the 50s and 60s, regaling listeners with tales of warriors, ghosts and detectives. Today, a group of eight Ngee Ann Polytechnic students have collaborated to launch Project Lee Dai Soh, an initiative to bond two generations together through the magical voice of the late Mr Lee. One of the initiatives is the Project Lee Dai Soh Exhibition, the first bilingual exhibition in Singapore that showcases exclusive Lee Dai Soh memorabilia, interactive games and more. Transport you and your children back to a simpler time and let them discover an age filled with imagination and wonderment, created solely by the mind and a voice. You too might feel a tinge of nostalgia wandering among the exhibit.
Where: The Arts House When: Now until 13 March 2014 Price: Free There is also a photography contest opened to the public. Just submit any photo that fits the theme “My Grandparents” to win cash and an 8GB thumb drive. For more information, head on over to www.fb.com/ProjectLeeDaiSoh.
Keep fit as a family and do your part for Mother Earth with NTUC Income RUN 350, Southeast Asia’s premier eco-run in support of the global 350 movement.
While parents can participate in the 10 km and 21 km categories, the young ones can go for the 350-metre dash! As part of the theme, the organisers, Young NTUC, have also introduced the Medal Recycling Campaign. Grab your old medals gathering dust in
Adapted into English by veteran Singaporean playwright and director Chay Yew, W!LD RICE’s The House of Bernarda Alba tells the story of a rigid Peranakan household controlled by its matriarch, Bernarda, who resolves to seal her family off from the world in an effort to keep up appearances after the death of her husband. “There’s so much [in the play] about rules, traditions and keeping up appearances that is so strikingly reminiscent of our own lives here in Singapore,” says Glen Goei, W!LD RICE Associate Director and director of The House of Bernarda Alba. A play for the adults and the older kids, The House of Bernarda Alba sees three generations of Singapore’s finest actresses electrify the stage and we’re sure this will be a night to remember for the family.
NTUC INCOME RUN 350
So, what does 350 signify? It’s the magic number that scientists believe is the level of carbon dioxide that we need to aim towards for our planet to continue being habitable in the future. As it stands right now, the atmospheric CO2 is more than 395 parts per million, and set to skyrocket even more.
Every year, W!LD RICE presents a spectacular theatre production, bringing together some of the best luminaries in the field. This year, the theatre company performs a tale of epic proportions written by esteemed Spanish playwright Frederico Garcia Lorca – The House of Bernarda Alba.
Where: Drama Centre Theatre When: 12 March to 29 March 2014 Price: Between S$55 and S$75 Enjoy 15% early bird discounts if you purchase your tickets before 12 February 2014!
the cupboard and contribute to the recycling effort. These medals will be processed and used in the production of new medals.
Where: F1 Pit Building When: 27 April 2014, 530 am to 1100 am Price: S$15 for kids and from S$55 for parents NTUC and nEbO members as well as NTUC Income policy holders can enjoy great discounts. For more information, visit www.RUN350.COM.
OP-ED
My 2 cents on...
…An Emergency in a Foreign Land By Maureen Schuster
In this exclusive series, our guest columnistsparents weigh in on the issues that are closest to their hearts. This month, a mother shares the emotional roller coaster she experienced in her first week in Singapore when her son hurt himself badly.
When my husband and I moved our three children from US to Singapore, we imagined all of the things we would experience – new cultures, travel, and of course, delicious food. But, we couldn’t have planned for what happened in our first week in Singapore. In the States, we lived in a spacious home in the suburbs. In Singapore, we moved to a high-rise condominium that was footsteps away from the MRT station and two shopping malls. They quickly adjusted to riding the train and taking cabs, and enjoyed having a swimming pool and tennis courts just an elevator ride away. A week after we arrived, our doorbell rang and there stood my sons’ first new friend in Asia, who lived three floors down from us. My sons were ecstatic to be invited to go down to the pool area. However, I was determined to finish unpacking and could not go down to supervise, so the kids promised that they would stay within the confines of the condo and reminded me that one of the great things about moving here was how safe it is in Singapore. I reluctantly agreed and they victoriously grabbed their scooters and set out for adultfree fun.
It’s important to remain calm in any emergency, especially in a foreign land, because your children are looking at you for leadership and guidance. 30
Family & Life • Feb 2014
Fifteen minutes later, the door flung open and I heard my son, Aaron, crying in pain. He was holding his mouth as blood seeped out between his fingers. Clutched in his fist was what was left of his new permanent front teeth. Being a seasoned mother, I was adept at composing myself in stressful parenting situations. I comforted him and wiped his tears while my other two children set up blankets on the couch and got his special stuffed bear. My hugs and his brothers’ compassionate deeds reassured him. However, panic soon begin to set in for this experienced mother. It was suddenly painfully clear that I had to navigate this emergency on my own, as I had no idea how to contact my husband at work and we had no family dentist yet. I grabbed my home phone and the five new insurance cards which were given to us upon our move before calling the customer service number on the back
of the card. I spoke to a curt employee in Pennsylvania, United States who informed me I would need to go online, fill out a profile, and request a login password to see a list of local dentists. I let her know I was not going to fill out an online profile and wait for a login when my son’s teeth were in pieces on my kitchen counter. She relented and began attempting to pronounce doctors’ names and addresses around Singapore, which was quite hilarious upon looking back as none of us knew this country well at all. I was getting frustrated as she read offices in places I had never heard of in my week here. I finally heard an Orchard Road location and knew it was a short cab ride away. The dentist managed to fit us in within an hour. I hung up the phone and remembered that the insurance lady said that I should put the teeth in a glass of milk to keep them fresh in case they could be reattached. The boys saw me with the teeth and asked whether I wanted the rest. They explained that they forgot and had left a few pieces down on the cement by the pool because they were so worried. When we headed down to retrieve the stray teeth, the elevator doors opened just in time for us to see the attentive grounds keeper clearing the pool area with a leaf blower, along with Aaron’s teeth. So much for putting those teeth back together.
We flagged down a cab and headed to Orchard Road. Once we arrived, we were swiftly checked in and met the dentist who put us at ease by confidently assuring us that they would make him look as good as new. Aaron was so brave but as they attached the new teeth, tears welled up in his eyes. They kindly stopped working whenever his tears came and asked him if he wanted to continue (a much gentler approach than in the States). He emerged from the dentist chair looking as he had when he woke up that morning. We returned home to a nervous father and I bragged about how brave my little guy had been. I learned an important lesson that day. It’s important to remain calm in any emergency, especially in a foreign land, because your children are looking at you for leadership and guidance. I’d like to say we never saw the dentist again except for routine teeth cleanings but a month later, in the pool, another child jumped on my son’s back, causing his new front teeth to be dislodged after hitting the bottom of the pool. This time, there was no panic. I knew what to expect and simply picked up the phone and called our new family dentist. The kind nurse at the office said: “Oh yes, we remember Aaron, we will see you at 3 pm Mrs. Schuster.”
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