Girlfriends nov dec 2017 by Kate Noet

Southern Minn

Girlfriends

HOLIDAY Growing generous hearts Philanthropy and teaching children about it. See page 6

Rejoice, Reflect and Reach out this holiday season. See page 14

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NOTE from the editor

forkner Moe Beth Forkner Moe is the editor of Southern Minn Girlfriends magazine.

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We had a great time at the “Hello Beautiful!” event on October 15. Our speaker, Joan Steffend, was the epitome of grace and kindness. What a lovely (or, shall I say, beautiful?) woman she is, inside and out. Those of us who were there left with smiles on our faces and warmth in our hearts. We’re in the time of year when the holidays come one after another, from mid-November through the beginning of January. Many people love everything about this season, from the food, to the decorating, to the traditions, to spending time with loved ones. For some, it is a stressful time – can we get everything done? Can we get it done perfectly? Will our children have the best holidays ever – and if they don’t, will they forever be miserable? My favorite part of this time of year is the light. Even though the days are short and the nights are long, there is so much color to brighten our lives. From candles on the hearth and on the trees, to enjoying driving around looking at people’s outdoor decorations (whether they’re elegant or garish), the lights and the colors always bring me joy. My second favorite part of this season is the food. In my immediate family, we celebrate (pretty much everything) with food. And the menus very rarely change, at least at Thanksgiving and Christmas. Thanksgiving includes (like many families) turkey, stuffing, potatoes (of all kinds), and pie. On Christmas Eve (or whenever we can get together as a larger family), we eat traditional foods from our mostly northern European heritage. Oyster stew, creamed potatoes with peas, a special kind of sausage that used to be made only in northern North Dakota (our home state), lefse, my great-grandmother’s plum pudding recipe (each of us “kids” has our own plum pudding mold, along with the original recipe), torsk (cod served with melted butter – NOT lutefisk!), and on and on. Yum! My mouth is watering. The very knowledge that we will be eating the same thing every year brings comfort and nostalgia and remembrances of years past. There’s certainly something to be said for tradition. We’ve eaten these same meals every year, since we were children and our grandparents (and even, for a few years, our great-grandparents) were still here. And we’ve (my sisters and I) passed along a lot of these traditions to our own children. Although our adult son now lives in Texas, every year we send him some pickled herring and frozen lefse right around Thanksgiving.

The first couple years we did this, he thought it was a bit lame. But now he looks forward to sharing this tradition with his friends when they have potluck holiday celebrations of their own. (His friends, who are of all different backgrounds and ethnicities, call the lefse “Viking bread.”) In this issue, we focus on ways to make the holidays meaningful, with ideas to give you food for thought and ideas of ways to enjoy the time. We talk about meaningful opportunities to give time and money; ways to create new rituals; ideas of activities and events to attend. And we give you some ideas to really get your children involved in the meaning behind the season, showing them the importance of taking care of others and gaining a lot themselves at the same time. We also share delicious recipes with you, and a way to make your food dollars stretch. We share a story about giving stability to children who are without their own family, whether that’s temporary or permanent. I think you’ll really like this issue’s book review – “Caroline.” It’s a novel about Laura Ingalls Wilder’s beloved “Ma.” My wish for you this holiday season – no matter what holidays you celebrate – is to find joy wherever and whenever you can.

P.S. – We have an update about Nika Hersch, the young girl we featured last issue. She has Selective Mutism, and her way of reaching out is to paint rocks and hide them around Northfield, as well as making a “gratitude tree” at the Northfield library. Her mother, Jana, writes that Nika took down the tree for the season (you can find pictures on her Facebook page (This Life Rocks). Nika is working on a new project – a kindness challenge – and will pair up with some non-profit groups for Bundle Up MN to help provide warm clothes for people. Way to go, Nika!

NOV/DEC 2017

about us editor: Beth Forkner Moe

contributing writers:

Kari Berit Rian Dicke-Michels Nancy Iglesias Trent Jonas Elizabeth Lippman Sarah Osterbauer Ramon Rodriquez Carron Terri Schlichenmeyer Anna Vangsness Grace Webb

multimedia consultants: Kristie Biehn Ginny Bergerson Nicole Brandon Kari Clark Kathleen Davies Missy Daschner Pam DeMorett Joan Koester Tim Mart Mark Nelson Jay Petsche Erin Rossow Kyle Shaw Gayle Stelten

graphic designer: Kate Townsend-Noet

ad designers:

Mary Jo Blanchard Nicole Gilmore Jenine Kubista Kelly Kubista Kate McGillen Jennifer Schoenbauer

Volume 9, Issue 6

southernminngirlfriends.com Send releases and story ideas to:

Beth Forkner Moe at Girlfriends magazine, bfmoe@southernminn.com

Find Southern Minn Girlfriends on Facebook

contents features

6 Growing generous hearts

Philanthropy and teaching children about it.

8 Hello Beautiful! It’s a wrap.

9 Get Out

& celebrate the holiday cheer around Southern Minnesota!

11 Helping local women & children Area non-profits.

14 During winter holidays, Americans... Rejoice, reflect and reach out to those in need.

16 Giving the gift of stability Becoming foster parents.

18 Making a difference one person at a time

The Starfish story reminds us that we can make a difference to someone.

26 Feeling stressed about the holidays? Traditions may be the answer.

34 The Matchstick Girl

Mankato Dance Company showcases unique Christmas production.

37 A new way to escape into fun

If you like solving mysteries, you need to check these out.

42 Fare for All - Food for all

Fare For All is a Twin Cities-based non-profit food share program that serves anyone.

52 Hello Beautiful!

Images from ‘Hello Beautiful’ women’s expo.

ON THE COVER: Photo provided by:

Faribault Woolen Mill Co. 1500 NW 2nd Avenue Faribault, MN www.faribaultmill.com See our ad on page 27

accessories

32 a man’s perspective 50 book review 30 food sense 54 gf directory 4 note from the editor 48 unexpected caregiver 46 wellness NOV/DEC 2017

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By Nancy Iglesias

Growing generous

Hearts 6

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grew up in a small rural community in Wisconsin. My parents weren’t perfect by any stretch, but I feel fortunate that I grew up in a home where generosity was a way of life. It was definitely a more simple day in a much more simple place. I don’t think that practicing generosity was necessarily intentional; it was more about who my parents were. It was a way of life for them. My mom, in particular, just plain loved being able to extend a hand of hospitality to anyone who dropped by. She did not work outside the home, but probably put in longer hours than most. She was, in many ways, the quintessential volunteer, friend and neighbor. The back door to her kitchen was always open, the coffee pot was always on and she seem to revel in being able to love on and serve others. It was a tremendous legacy and a gift she gave to her children, friends and neighbors. Today’s world seems very different than those simpler days in smalltown Wisconsin. The pressures of raising children and grandchildren in a consumer-oriented media-driven society is much more complex. As we approach the holiday season where a spirit of “getting” can sadly sometimes overtake the “giving,” it seems appropriate to do a little reflecting on how we grow generous hearts in our families. I firmly believe you can’t force generosity and, in fact, doing so might cause more harm than good. But I do think there is value in thinking through how we foster generosity in our families, our communities and even ourselves.

MODEL GENEROSITY It is like the classic poem about children learning what they live. If they see people around them - parents, grandparents, teachers, neighbors - being generous, they are much more likely to become generous people

themselves. The truly generous heart is one that is filled with joy at the opportunity to generously live out a life of kindness and service. Think about someone you know who loves to give. What are the adjectives that describe them? What are the adjectives that people would use to describe you?

could help spearhead with your child. Even if the group is just your family, make it an adventure, and make it fun! Decide upon a special birthday campaign to raise money for a charity. When inviting friends to a birthday party, let your child pick a favorite charity that friends and family can donate to.

FOSTER A SENSE OF CURIOSITY ABOUT THE WORLD

CALL A FAMILY MEETING TO FORMULATE A FAMILY GIVING PLAN

Help your kids or grandkids learn about all the amazing people and places in our world, but also the fact that many people live with great needs. When a crisis or international event happens, talk it over with them in a way they can understand it at their ages. During the Kosovo refugee crisis in the late 1990s, more than 600,000 people had become refugees fleeing their homeland and entering temporary camps in the neighboring countries of Albania and Macedonia. Eventually, those refugees would be resettled in a variety of places, including about 20,000 people who were sent to the United States. A friend of mine recently reminded me that her son was about 9 years old at the time. He was insistent that they adopt a refugee from Kosovo. They obviously had watched enough world news and had enough family discussions that he knew that an immigrant from Kosovo would have tremendous needs, and his little heart wanted to help meet those needs. While you don’t want to overdo it on all the heavy things that are happening in our world, there are so many teachable moments for us as we open the eyes of our kids to the many needs of this world. (By the way, my friends did not adopt a refugee, but their son was still determined to help. He had his mom drive him to the local Red Cross chapter, where he brought the contents of his piggy bank, $27.00, to be donated to refugee relief.)

If your family is the kind that makes a year-end donation to one or more groups locally, nationally or globally, host a family board meeting. Give each child an invitation to the board meeting and ask them to come with a couple of suggestions. Use an easel or a piece of poster board to list your options. As a parent, come with options too, but leave room for brainstorming. Give everyone around the table a voice and a vote. You might want to come up with some options for the short-term, but also make some longer-term plans for the new year. What are the things that your family can passionately support? Work to create excitement for the plan! Make assignments about how the plan will be executed and who will be responsible for what.

FAN THE SPARKS OF GENEROSITY

INCLUDE SOME THINGS IN YOUR FAMILY GIVING PLAN THAT THEY CAN ACTUALLY SEE OR TOUCH Donate the funds necessary to purchase a door for a Habitat home. Take the opportunity to attend the dedication when the house is completed so that they meet the family who will be purchasing that home. Donate new or used books to your library, or let your family pick out a favorite new toy to donate to a giving tree. Shop and pack a shoebox for Operation Christmas Child. Encourage them to write the card that goes with one of those gifts.

If something sparks your child’s curiosity, run with it. If they love animals, visit your local animal shelter to find out what they need and then let your child shop with you for dog food or cat litter. If they love to cook, let them cook or serve a meal at a homeless shelter. If they love music, give a scholarship to a local dance studio. I read a story recently about a little boy in Janesville, Wisconsin who was intrigued by the veteran who came to his kindergarten class on Veterans Day. He came home and told his mom that he thought being a soldier would be a difficult job and wondered if they could send a few Christmas packages to people serving overseas. His Christmas Care package fund started with several dollars in change given to him by his grandpa. Through social media and the generosity of family and friends, Logan raised $800 and was able to shop for and send packages to 17 military personnel. Last year Operation Logan raised, $2000 to send 30 packages. This year his goal is to raise enough money to send 50 packages. They have a scrapbook filled with notes of appreciation from soldiers, literally from around the world. His mom could have overlooked his initial request to send the packages, but instead turned it into a great teachable moment. What would capture the fancy of the little ones in your life? Go the extra mile with your kids to see what could happen.

TEACH THEM TO ACKNOWLEDGE WHEN OTHERS HAVE SHOWN GENEROSITY TO THEM.

MAKE IT A GROUP PROJECT

Check out these fun and helpful resources: Boom Boom Cards – www.boomboomcards.com World Repair Kit - www.popsugar.com/moms/World-Repair-Kit-8589079 GenerousKids.com

It is often more fun, and easier to build momentum, when you can gather a group. Cub Scouts, Girl Scouts or church groups are great places to start. Gather the kids in your neighborhood to carry out a little party at a senior center or nursing home or take cookies to the police station or fire station. Get the neighborhood kids to shovel someone’s sidewalk and then come back to your house for hot chocolate. Ask your child’s classroom teacher if there might be a project you

Never forget that many of the seeds of generosity comes from a grateful heart. Teach your kids how to write a thank-you note. There are lots of ways to make it fun. Let them write the note themselves, or if they are still quite young, have them draw a picture. Take a picture of them enjoying the gift and let them dictate to you what they would like to say. Take moments along the way to remember the generosity of others. While I’ve given you seven ideas for fostering generosity in your family, they are merely just thoughts to get your creative juices flowing. You have to do it your way, in your style. It’s not just about completing a couple of random acts of kindness or finding nice things to do between Thanksgiving and Christmas, the goal should always be to make it a lifestyle, to weave it into the fabric of your everyday life. Sometimes your generosity will be pre-planned, sometimes it will be spontaneous! Tend well to your own heart so that you can move forward into a season of giving with and for those you love and those who you have never met.

Nancy Iglesias is a freelance writer and non-profit consultant. She spent 20 years working as an Executive Director for Habitat for Humanity in Winona, MN. Prior to that, she was the Marketing Manager for InterVarsity Press in Downers Grove, IL. Nancy enjoys entertaining, water fitness and teaching preschoolers at her church. NOV/DEC 2017

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WOMEN’S EXPO “Hello Beautiful!”

gf We asked attendees to share what they think makes a woman beautiful. Look for there responses throughout this edition. Sponsored By:

Additional Sponsors

Kleckers Kreations 8

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YOUR LIP SUPERHERO

Presented By

Southern Minn

was a beautiful event on a beautiful day. SouthernMinn Girlfriends’ first Women’s Expo was held October 15 at the Holiday Inn in Owatonna. Girlfriends Almost 300 women were in attendance, browsing what local vendors had to offer, eating amazing food (we were told it would be light appetizers – instead, it was a feast!), and meeting and hearing the extraordinary speaker, Joan Steffend. Joan, a former KARE-11 TV anchor, and star and host of HGTV’s “Decorating Cents,” enthralled the crowd. Her personal stories of kindness, heartbreak, and self-acceptance were meaningful and thought-provoking. She encouraged the women to realize how each of us are unique and beautiful, and that it’s self-defeating to compare ourselves to anyone else. All the women we spoke to during the event told us they enjoyed themselves. They came in twos and threes and fours – sisters/ moms and daughters/friends. It was a lovely event, and we hope to see you at next year’s expo. We’ve already started planning for it!

TURN TO PAGE 52 FOR IMAGES FROM THIS YEAR’S EVENT!

www.newulm.com

visitingnorthfield.com

Celebrate the Holiday Cheer Around Southern Minnesota!

here are so many things to do in the region during this holiday season – festivals, lights, carols, etc. Bundle up the kids or grandkids, and enjoy making some new memories (or enjoying the traditions you’ve made during the years). For more information about these and other events, visit www.exploreminnesota.com.

Holly Days Sale Paradise Center for the Arts, 321 Central Ave. N., Faribault November 9-December 23 Paradise Center galleries will be decked out in boutique style and filled with the artistic wares of 20-plus regional artists. What a wonderful way to find that one-of-a-kind gift for someone special or to pick up unique hostess and teacher gifts at a nominal cost! A portion of the sales will help fund continuing programs and exhibits at the Paradise Center for the Arts.

Kiwanis Holiday Lights Mankato November 24-December 31 A celebration of holiday lights for the Mankato area that builds on past traditions and promotes the community, while raising food donations for those in need.

This year’s attractions include a display of more than 1.5 million LED lights, animated lights, skating rink and warming house, horse-drawn wagon rides, Santa Claus, live reindeer, ice sculptures and more! The opening night parade will begin at 6:00 p.m. on November 24.

Parade of Lights New Ulm November 24, 6:00 p.m. Annually on the Friday evening after Thanksgiving, New Ulm welcomes Santa to town with a Parade of Lights. More than 60 units, all decked out with thousands of twinkling lights, makes their way through our Historic Downtown. Children of all ages will delight in this parade! Head to City Hall after the parade for the Official Christmas Tree lighting ceremony.

Owatonna Lighted Holiday Parade November 30, 6:00 p.m. Bundle up and head to downtown Owatonna for the Lighted Holiday Parade starting at 6:00. Parade vehicles will be decked out in their finest holiday lights. The parade ends with carolers and cider in Central Park.

Montgomery Torchlight Parade and Fireworks November 30, 6:30 p.m.

Holiday Torchlight parade followed by a fireworks display. The fireworks display will be on the south end of 1st Street South.

Hometown Holiday Weekend Owatonna November 30-December 3 A weekend filled with events and activities the whole family can enjoy! Lighted Holiday Parade – November 30, 6:00 p.m. The parade ends with carolers and cider in Central Park. The rest of the weekend is full of special events and music, plus plenty of opportunities to shop locally.

Holiday Lights Parade & Fireworks Le Sueur December 1, 6:00 p.m. Holiday lights parade on North Main Street includes units of area businesses and organizations.

Bells on Belgrade 301 Belgrade Ave, North Mankato December 2, 3:00 p.m.-6:00 p.m. 4th Annual Children’s Free Christmas Celebration in Beautiful Lower North Mankato.

Winter Wonderland Parade December 2 – 6:30 p.m., Belgrade Ave. Holiday fun event for the entire family. Trolley CONTINUES ON PAGE 10 u u u NOV/DEC 2017

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rides along Belgrade Ave, Medallion hunt, Santa and elves, local caroling groups, Winter Wonderland Parade and more.

Winter Festival and Parade of Lights Faribault December 2 Join us in downtown Faribault for a parade of lights followed by fireworks and a live band playing in the streets! Dress for warmth and plan to have fun!

Winter Walk Northfield December 7, evening In the heart of the holiday season, an event takes place that draws crowds from near and far. Steaming cups of hot cocoa, the sounds of hooves clippity-clapping along the streets, and candles flickering in the breeze, creates a magical and can’t miss one-night festival. Visitors can walk through unique shops and enjoy beautifully decorated storefront window displays. There will be horse-drawn carriages ready to take you for a short ride, carolers

strolling through downtown along with thousands of twinkling lights to guide your path! Old and young alike enjoy viewing the model train display located in the lower level of the Archer House River Inn & Suites – or

watching the performance of the NAGCracker (Nutcracker) at the Northfield Arts Guild. Santa Claus and his elves will be making an appearance as well as Frosty the Snowman and Rudolf the Red-nosed Reindeer!

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Helping

local women children

G By Sarah Osterbauer

ive to the Max Day is quickly approaching (November 16) and in that spirit, we invite you to take a look at some locally based charities that focus their attention on the needs of women and children. The stories of the people these organizations serve are a stark reminder of everything we have to be grateful for this season. Minnesota is often championed as one of the best places to live in the country, and these charities shine a light on how hard times can fall on anyone, but also how fortunate we are to have groups like these who are working tirelessly for the greater good.

Youthlink Youthlink estimates that on any given night in Minnesota, 4,000 young people will experience homelessness. They strive to serve the needs of these youth by providing resources to find housing as well as assistance with any overarching root causes of homelessness. They focus on meeting people where they are, creating a stable environment for young people so they’re able to thrive in school and the job market. By focusing on youth ages 16 - 23, they’re able to empower young people to become more self-reliant and see hope for their future. Youthlink has a variety of volunteer opportunities available for individuals or groups including but not limited to tutors, childcare and meal service. www.youthlinkmn.org

One Heartland Crescent Cove Having a child in need of hospice care is a scenario no parent wants to encounter. Unfortunately the reality is that (according to Crescent Cove’s website) more than 700 children die each year in Minnesota alone, and nearly half of those could benefit from hospice care and/ respite services. In November, Crescent Cove will open its new facility in Brooklyn Center, only the third one of its kind in the country. They will offer hospice and palliative care as well as family services. They’ll provide an escape from the sterile hospital environment for children with life-threatening diseases and their families. It will give families a place to be together, while getting a break from stressful, often 24-hour caregiving. The official Grand Opening Ribbon cutting is scheduled for November 16, which also happens to be Give to the Max Day. They hope it will inspire people to take notice of their cause and reach for their wallets. Indeed, their stories will tug at the iciest of heart strings. To learn more, visit www.crescentcove.org

What started as a camp for kids with HIV/ AIDS has expanded to include any child facing “social isolation, intolerance or serious health challenges.” With an extraordinary ratio of one counselor for every two campers, One Heartland uses education and recreation to empower campers to feel confident in themselves and their skills. They make every camper feel valued and – Mary R., Owatonna appreciated, dedicated to shutting down bullying culture. Camp is the place where these kids can let go and truly be themselves taking in the wilder-

“Confidence. Courage. Grace under adversity.”

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ness, swimming, writing poetry, painting and many other activities. The camp is staffed primarily by volunteers from counselors, to medical staff to food service, they have many options available. www.oneheartland.org

Breaking Free

Perspectives Inc. Founded in 1976, the main goal of Perspectives has always been to break the cycle of addiction for women, particularly those with children. Once they started to provide services, they realized that what these women needed most, aside from recovery services, was transitional sober housing, and mental health services. Now, with a campus of five apartment buildings and an office space for educational programming, they offer a full array of support for women and children facing addiction. They are committed to helping families get back on their feet by providing support and resources that aide in physical and mental stability for all involved. They provide education around job readiness, nutrition and parenting. Perspectives has a wide spectrum of volunteer opportunities for many different skills and expertise. www.perspectives-family.org

Casa De Esperanza With the unique focus on serving the needs of Latina women, Casa De Esperanza provides bilingual support and services for victims of domestic violence. Recognizing the specific needs of the Latin community they offer assistance navigating immigration issues, accessing public health benefits, understanding law enforcement, court advocacy, as well as finding transitional housing. They run a 24-hour bilingual helpline, which is the only one of its kind in the state. Their family advocates ensure participants are well-informed of their options so that individuals are able to make the best decision for themselves and their family. They accept volunteers to help in their administrative office, to organize fundraisers or with a group to plant gardens or do other outside work. www.casadeesperanza.org

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Based in St Paul with a location in Minneapolis, Breaking Free aspires to rid the world of prostitution and sex trafficking. They strive for this via direct services for victims and survivors, by educating communities about the effects of sexual exploitation, and by advocating for victims. They have resources for holistic support, including addiction support, pro bono law services, transitional housing, as well as advocates acting on clients’ behalf to access necessary services. They offer classes to educate law professionals, health professionals and law enforcement on how to treat victims. They also offer a program for Johns, in an effort to stop the demand for prostitution all together. They are committed to ensuring survivors have every opportunity to live a fulfilling life free from the barriers of their past. Breaking Free accepts individual and group volunteers for a variety of projects. www.breakingfree.net/about_us.aspx This is only a short list of organizations that help women and children in our region every day. For more information on local non-profits in our area, check out the websites of Southern Minnesota United Ways. They often list the organizations they fund. You can also call 2-1-1 (not only to find organizations, but to reach out for assistance and information yourself). Greater Mankato Area United Way – www.mankatounitedway.org Northfield Area United Way – www.northfieldunitedwayorg United Way of Faribault – www.unitedwayoffaribault.org United Way of Steele County – www.unitedwaysteelecounty.org For more information about Give to the Max Day, visit www.GiveMN.org. Sarah Osterbauer is a freelance writer based in St. Paul.

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During winter holidays, Americans

rejoice, ref lect and out to reach those in need

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Source: www.share.america.gov

he U.S. winter holiday season, running from late November through early January, is when Americans take extra time to gather with family and friends — and express gratitude for life’s abundance.

A season of giving thanks and gifts Thanksgiving, observed on the fourth Thursday in November, marks the official start of the season. It’s a day for catching up with farflung family members, sharing traditional American foods and taking a break from hectic work schedules. Each year, millions of Americans

travel hundreds of miles to sit down with family and friends for a meal that usually includes roast turkey, with stuffing, cranberry sauce, mashed potatoes and gravy, sweet potatoes and pumpkin pie. And in households across the country, sports fans gather after dinner to watch televised, U.S.-style football games played on Thanksgiving Day. But Thanksgiving is also a day when thousands of Americans volunteer to help the needy. From the tall to the small, from professional athletes to schoolchildren, Americans from all walks of life help those in need on Thanksgiving Day. Mindful of their own good fortune, Americans from coast to coast prepare and serve traditional Thanksgiving meals at community centers and churches. Others donate to charities that feed the hungry, or compete in fundraising marathons that benefit local food banks. As with Thanksgiving, the ap-

proach of Christmas, celebrated on December 25, spurs many Americans — even those who are not religious — to give to others. Each year, Americans contribute millions of dollars and millions of volunteer hours to help the disadvantaged during the winter holidays. For Christians, the holiday marks the anniversary of Jesus’ birth some 2,000 years ago, and in the United States — as in other countries — the faithful attend church services. Most Americans, including non-Christians, exchange gifts, such as homemade cookies and other baked treats. In many U.S. cities, Christmas carolers stroll residential neighborhoods or gather in public squares, singing traditional carols and spreading cheer.

Americans: People of many faiths and traditions Americans are adherents of many faiths, and the U.S. winter holiday season embraces that diversity. The Jewish holiday of Hanukkah, which is December 12-20 this year, commemorates the rededication of the Holy Temple in Jerusalem more than 2,000 years ago. Hanukkah is celebrated over a period of eight nights and days, and observed by kindling the lights on a nine-branched candelabrum called a menorah. Hanukkah festivities include playing dreidel (a game of chance using a four-sided spinning top inscribed with Hebrew letters), eating foods such as doughnuts and latkes,

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and — as with Christmas — exchanging congregate to watch a crystal ball drop from gifts. the sky at the appointed hour. Millions of Hanukkah and Christmas celebrations Americans nationwide watch the televised typically feature gift exchanges. countdown. Each year since 1966, millions of African But residents of Easton, Maryland, drop Americans have connected with their African a crab instead of a crystal ball, a nod to the cultural and historical roots by celebrating Maryland coastline and its abundant seafood. Kwanzaa from December 26 to January 1. In Mount Olive, North Carolina, residents Honoring family, community and culture gather to watch a giant, glowing pickle drop, are at the heart of Kwanzaa, which families and in Tempe, Arizona, the locals celebrate observe by decorating their homes with by dropping a giant tortilla chip. In PlymAfrican-inspired art, African kente cloth outh, Wisconsin, an oversized mound of and fruits that symbolize African idealism. cheese descends, in tribute to the city’s dairyCeremonies may include drumming, musical based economy. performances and a candle-lighting ritual, New Year’s Day is marked by parades and culminating in a feast known as karamu. U.S.-style football games, and in most com Today, many African-American families munities, the first baby to be born on New celebrate Kwanzaa along with Christmas. Year’s Day is honored with gifts and media The U.S. winter holiday season concludes coverage. with New Year’s celebrations, and although In addition, New Year’s Day abounds New Year’s Day is celebrated on January 1, with rituals and superstitions brought to the the festivities begin the night before — on United States by many immigrant groups. New Year’s Eve. For example, it’s considered good luck to Americans — like millions around the eat black-eyed peas on New Year’s Day in world — herald the new year as a time for Southern states, a tradition traced to Asia and fresh beginnings, with hope for a better Africa. Cabbage and sauerkraut, to represent future and resolutions to improve one’s beprosperity and long life, are Eastern Eurohavior. On New Year’s Eve, Americans host parties pean contributions to New Year’s dinner. Immigrants of various nationalities and attend concerts, fireworks displays and believed that loud noises drive away the bad other special gatherings. Festivities differ spirits of the past year and ensure a new year from place to place, with regional variations free of evil. So making noise to welcome the on well-known customs. We now have many more companies the market, lowering the of the materials, which Yearinremains ingrained incost American In a tradition that dates from 1907, NewimplantNew allow us to pass the savingsNew on to our patients. By offering in implant surgeryofinfireour practice, the Year’ s celebrations, the form Yorkers famously count down to the midsavings in time and money have made dental implants more affordable than ever. Call us for a FREE night hour in Times Square, where thousands partyornoisemakers. consultation. Whether you are works, replacingwhistles one tooth, and all of them, somewhere in between, I would love to help design a personalized treatment plan to change your life and also fit your budget. ---Todd Christianson, DDS

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By Elizabeth Lippman (Editor’s Note: Names have been changed to not identify either the family or the children they have cared for over the years.)

usan and her husband Stan had children of their own, but they learned there were other children who needed a place to call home – children in the foster care system. So they decided to reach out and care for some of these children, while the children’s own families were in crisis. “There was a big need that we saw,” Susan said. “When our own children were younger, we began fostering children. When our kids were teenagers, we didn’t do it anymore.” But about eight years ago, they felt it was

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time again to bring in others. “We have a large home (with plenty of room), and I thought we could offer some stability to kids in times of crisis,” she said. “I knew we could help them on their journey through this crisis until they get to the other end.” According to the latest information from Minnesota’s Department of Human Services, there were almost 14,000 children in foster care in 2015. That number had increased almost 12 percent since the previous year. Children end up in the foster care system mostly because their parents are unable or unwilling to care for them. Numbers have increased dramatically over the past several years, as the opioid epidemic has increased, and children have been removed from their homes while the parents are either in treatment or in the criminal justice system. Often, children are cared for by other family members. But many end up in the of-

ficial foster care system, cared for by others. Sometimes the placements are short (either because the children are able to be reunified with their parents, or because the particular placements don’t work out for a variety of reasons); sometimes they are longer, sometimes years. In some cases, the foster parents adopt the children they have been caring for. Susan and Stan have worked with teenagers for the past eight years. “They’re one of the tougher groups, because they come with a variety of different problems that have already been established,” she said. “We learned that with little ones, some come with more baggage than others and have had more negative experiences in their lives. Teenagers are different though; it takes a real mix of being very direct and clear with your boundaries and being willing to reinforce those boundaries in a way that is effective for them.”

“With teenagers, you have a very small time to influence their life, and you hope they one day will look back and know you helped them,” Susan said. The very first night a couple teens came to their house, Susan said, they sat in their chairs at the dinner table and turned their backs on Susan and Stan. “They said they weren’t hungry,” she said. “When dinner was over, I talked with them and told them that everyone takes part in dinner in our home. We all clear the table and wash the dishes.” The next night went better. “They came out and ate and talked. Not everybody has had that traditional meal time in their lives. We try to do that on a nightly basis. We ask the kids something good that happened that day.” Basically, she said, she and Stan try to give the teens a “normal” family time. When foster children turn 18, they are legally adults, even if they’re still in high school. They can make the decision to leave foster care if that’s what they choose. Sometimes foster families don’t let the children stay with them after they turn 18. Usually, foster families, the children and their social worker try to work together to help everyone make the best decision for them. “The first two teens we had stayed until they graduated,” Susan said. “The third one moved in with her boyfriend when she turned 18.” “You have to be realistic when you do foster care,” Susan said, explaining that it’s not a miracle and there are often difficult days, as the children try to make sense of their situation. What qualities do foster care parents need to have to be successful? According to Susan, they need to be flexible and non-judgmental (of either the children or their parents). In her case, she had learned from her stepchildren to build relationships with children who

are not her biological children. “We also need to recognize that not all kids have the same values. Our job is to try to bridge that and work with the kids and their families,” she said. Consistency is another factor. “The kids have to follow the rules of our house while they are here,” she said. “Sometimes that’s difficult, but we make it clear how we do things. The kids generally come around to that.” One of Susan’s non-negotiable issues is education. Education is important to her, and she follows up with her former foster children to see how they are doing. “One of our great rewards took a long time to see. When we first began fostering about 20 years ago, we had several younger kids living with us during the school year,” she said. One of those children, a first-grader at the time, was the first person from his family to graduate from high school and go on to graduate from college and to earn a Master’s degree. Another reward, she said, is that some of the children they had fostered still call her to ask her opinion about things, or talk to her when they are in trouble, or ask her for a job reference. “When you plant the seed, you don’t know where it’s going to go,” she said. How do you become a foster parent? The first step is to contact the licensor in your county (generally the Human Services Department in your county seat). They will give you information on how to become licensed. Some steps include a background check, an interview by the licensor, an inspection of the home to make sure it is safe and up to code, and references from people you know.

“There is such a need for foster families who are willing to open their homes to kids. When they have to be taken from their home, they’re so traumatized, and they need to know they’re going to be safe and have food on the table,” Susan said. “They need to

Susan’s motto:

“Love them the best while you have them and do the best for them while they’re here.” gf “Helping other people. Caring enough to listen to your friends and share your inner self.” – JoAnne N., Faribault know that someone will get them to school and go to their conferences. There are never enough homes. It’s an area where you can change someone’s life.” Elizabeth Lippman is a freelance writer and editor based in Winona, Minn. She holds a master’s degree in literary nonfiction. A mother of four, she loves the Appalachian Mountains, her garden and honeybees, and much good music.

Help Children in Rice County Across Rice County, our licensed foster parents open up their homes and hearts to youth who have been separated from their biological families. Foster parents play a huge role in providing love and support and a lasting presence in the lives of these children who have endured a great deal of hardship. Rice County has the need for additional homes. Foster Care can be short term to long term care. Foster parents also provide occasional respite for children (pre-arranged scheduled breaks for children/families); you can obtain licensure specifically for this type of care. There is a great need for additional homes for children of all ages.

If you are interested in learning more, please refer to our website at www.co.rice.mn.us for more information or contact Rice County Social Services at 507-332-6115.

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By Nancy Iglesias

e live in a world with tremendous need. From the devastating effects of recent wildfires, hurricanes and earthquakes to social and economic injustices around the world, almost daily, our newsfeeds are filled with the sad faces of people whose needs are too great for us to even understand. Sometimes, we don’t really have to look any further than the people down our street, in our neighborhoods and in our communities. It is easy to become overwhelmed. We see so many needs, and even so many options to address them, that we might become frozen and do nothing. It might also be easy to believe that whatever small

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resources we have to give - whether time, talent or treasure - will be little more than a drop in the bucket and won’t really make a difference. So where does that leave us? I have always loved the Starfish Story and the way it reminds us that while we can’t solve every problem, there is tremendous value in doing something that will make a difference to someone. Here is that story adapted from the original by Loren Eiseley. “Once upon a time, there was a wise man who used to go to the ocean to do his writing. He had a habit of walking on the beach before he began his work. One day, as he was walking along the shore, he looked down the beach and saw someone moving like a dancer. He smiled to himself at the thought of someone who would begin the day dancing on the beach and so he walked faster to catch up. As he got closer, he noticed that the figure was that of a young boy and that what he was doing was not dancing at all. The

young boy was reaching down to the shore, picking up small objects, and throwing them into the ocean. He came closer still and called out “Good morning! May I ask what it is that you are doing?” The young boy paused, looked up, and replied “Throwing starfish into the ocean.” “I must ask, then, why are you throwing starfish into the ocean?” To this, the young boy replied, “The sun is up and the tide is going out. If I don’t throw them in, they’ll die.” Upon hearing this, the wise man commented, “But, young man, do you not realize that there are miles and miles of beach and there are starfish all along every mile? You can’t possibly make a difference!” At this, the young boy bent down, picked up yet another starfish, and threw it into the ocean. As it met the water, he said, “It made a difference for that one.” With that story in mind, here are a few starfish stories I have recently run across that inspired me to keep on looking for ways to make a difference.

Starfish Issue #1 – World Hunger

Every day 6,200 children die of starvation around the world. Tens of thousands more do not have adequate nutrition to thrive and learn. Feed My Starving Children (FMSC), founded and based in Minnesota, FMSC utilized nearly 1.1 million volunteers to pack more than 284 million meals in

2016. Those meals were shipped to more than 70 countries. With permanent packing sites in the Twin Cities and multiple mobile packing sites in southeastern Minnesota, FMSC is a great organization for families, businesses and community groups to come together to make a difference in world hunger. Just 25 cents pays for one meal. I read a story about a 14-year-old girl who was so inspired by her trip to a mobile packing site that she asked a local restaurant if she could play her harp on the week-ends to raise additional funds for FMSC. So far she has raised enough to feed 2 children for a year and she is still performing. I checked out the Facebook page of Feed My Starving Children. It didn’t really matter what city the meals were packed in, the resounding cheer was “Look what we did! We packed over 5000 meals in a day!” One mom posted that she had taken her son to one of the packing stations in honor of his eighth birthday. They were shocked to learn that just $80.00 can feed a child for a year. He can’t wait to go back. One of the things that I love the most is the variety of people who come to a packing event. From kindergarteners to senior citizens, from church youth groups to corporate bankers and everyone in between, there is room for almost everyone at a Feed My Starving Children packing table. For more info: www.fmsc.org

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Starfish Issue #2 Substandard Housing

Habitat for Humanity International says they are working toward a day when every family has a simple, decent and affordable home. Habitat believes they are building more than just homes; they are building hope, they are building community. Habitat is building strength, stability and self-reliance through shelter. Every year more two million people choose to volunteer with Habitat. Around the world, one in four families live in poverty-level housing. Habitat is trying to change that. Since 1976, Habitat has completed more than one million homes and provided improved housing for more than seven million people. Habitat acts as both the banker and the builder. Habitat homeowners make a monthly mortgage payment, then that money is turned around and recycled back into building more homes. And Habitat is not just about building new homes, many affiliates are doing neighborhood revitalization and critical home repairs in their communities. The good news is that you don’t have to be a carpenter to be useful on a Habitat work site. Habitat construction managers and job-site crew leaders are always available to provide leadership and direction for your volunteer team. Whether you have lots of skill or no skill, you can be a valuable volunteer. You can spend a day a year or a day a week at a Habitat site. And the sense of community is not just for the homeowners. Something quite special happens on a Habitat job site. The Rice County Habitat in Northfield celebrates these special relationships by hosting an annual “Family Reunion”. Work site volunteers, partner families, and current and past board and committee members come together to enjoy a hayride, a meal and an evening of reconnecting with one another. People of all ages and from all walks of life have found great satisfaction in making a difference through Habitat. In fact, that is one of the things that Winona’s Habitat Construction Manager, John Corcoran, says of his job in leading volunteers. “It’s just so fun to see how surprised people are by what they can do

personally and corporately on a job site. There is just a sense of pride and accomplishment. They look at the finished product and say, Wow! We really did make a difference!” This fall, he had a group of 15-20 people that painted a whole house in just 3 hours. Another group from Hy-Vee tore off the shingles and put a new roof on an older home in Winona. Winona’s Habitat is focusing on neighborhood revitalization and critical repair and will have dramatically improved the living condition of 35 families in this program. But even if you would not be comfortable on a construction site, there are still many ways to contribute at Habitat. South Central Habitat in Mankato has a beautiful Habitat ReStore. They are always looking for volunteers and shoppers. And check out the Habitat Minnesota 500 bicycle ride. If cycling is your passion, or if you’ve always wanted to be part of a bicycle SAG team, save the week of July 15-21, 2018 to raise money for the organization. One house, one family at a time, you can make a difference.

Starfish Issue #3 You Can Make a Difference Diseases from unsafe water and lack of basic sanitation kill more people every year than all forms of violence, including war. Every day about 1,400 children die from diseases caused by unsafe water. How would college students from Minnesota be able to have an impact on the issue and need of clean drinking water in Africa? One young man from the University of Minnesota-Duluth and another group of college students from Gustavus Adolphus University took their passion and decided to do something about that issue. Marshal Quast, a student at UMD and a cross-country runner from Redwood Falls, Minn., decided to run across the lower portion of Minnesota in the summer of 2016. Marshal started near Ivanhoe on the Minn/S.D. border and ended in Red Wing. He took three weeks and ran five miles each morning and five miles each evening to cross all 214 miles. Marshall raised $5,640 which he donated to Charity: Water (www.charitywater.org). They are one of several non-profit organizations who are providing simple solutions like drilled wells, spring protections and bio sand filters to address the issues of clean water.

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In September of 2014, a group of students from Gustavus Adolphus and their Economics professor, Dr. Paul Estenson put their heads and hearts together as a part of a social entrepreneurs’ club. Doc E (Estenson) gave the students his salsa recipe and challenged them to go make a difference. Together, they formed the GSE General Benefit Corporation and have already sold enough salsa to build one well in Ethiopia through Water to Thrive (www.watertothrive. org). Who could have ever guessed that a little salsa could be turned into life-giving water on the other side of the world? Check out their Facebook page (www.facebook.com/DocEsSalsa) for a complete list

of locations to purchase the salsa in the Twin Cities, Mankato and St. Peter. I might just be placing an order for some of my folks on my Christmas list. So, what’s your passion? How can you do just one thing this month, this week or today to make a difference in someone’s life? There are so many ways to help people, and you can make a difference all by yourself, or with your family. Nancy Iglesias is a freelance writer and non-profit consultant. She spent 20 years working as an Executive Director for Habitat for Humanity in Winona, MN. Prior to that, she was the Marketing Manager for InterVarsity Press in Downers Grove, IL. Nancy enjoys entertaining, water fitness and teaching preschoolers at her church.

20 Simple Ways for You and Your Kids or Grandkids to Make a Difference Compiled by Nancy Iglesias

• Send a care package to someone serving in the military. • Make dog treats or purchase a bag of dog food and deliver to an animal shelter. • Donate gently used books to your doctor’s or dentist’s office, for people to read while they are waiting for their appointments. • Take a basket of warm socks to a homeless shelter or an overnight warming shelter. • Quickly grab your shovels after the next snowfall and clear your neighbor’s sidewalk and/or driveway before they have the chance. • Take treats to your local firefighters, police officers or ambulance drivers. • Use sidewalk chalk to surprise someone with a sweet note of encouragement. • Take canned goods to your local food pantry. Offer to serve as a family sorting food donations. • Pay it forward by purchasing someone’s meal or coffee in the drive-thru. • Volunteer as a family to babysit for another family. • Think of someone who can’t “go home for the holidays” and invite them over for a meal or hot cocoa. • Fill a backpack with school supplies and give to your school principal to have on hand for kids who might need extra supplies.

• Go through your coat closet and donate to a local warm winter coat drive. • Attend a Fair Trade Market event in your community. • Find a “Giving Tree” for children or seniors who might need an extra special gift. • Make cards or placemats for a local nursing home or assisted living facility. • Send a thank you note to someone who has made a difference in your life. • Adopt a senior who might be lonely as an extra grandma or grandpa. • Sponsor a child at your local YMCA. • Create your own list and go do at least one thing today.

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Kimberly Haala, PhD, LP

Connie Meyer, MSW, LICSW

By Anna Vangsness

efore we know it the calendar is going to flip to January, but not before we’ve had the opportunity to come together with friends and family, celebrating a number of holidays. Between work, taking care of kids or helping with grandchildren and taking time to care for ourselves and spouses, it’s common to struggle with moving our attention away from our daily lives and focusing on blessings around the holidays. To help shift that focus, Mankato Clinic Psychologists Kimberly Haala, PhD, LP, and Connie Meyer, MSW, LICSW, say that rituals and traditions can help give people a reason to slow down,

connect and feel gratitude. “Rituals and traditions are helpful because they provide comfort and stability, and keep people calm,” Meyer said. “The main thing is that they ground people and can help lessen people’s anxieties when they know what to expect.” Though rituals and traditions are similar, Meyer said the differences between the two are that traditions are things we do over and over, often handing them down to the next generation as a way to keep family habits going, and rituals have a more spiritual and emotional dimension to them. “Rituals and traditions really help foster a sense of joining and group identity,” Haala said. “They provide history and stability that help people’s relationships with their past and their family’s past.” Haala said that when people have a lot of

expectations or concerns in their private or work lives, they tend to focus solely on the issue at hand because they feel like it’s a problem that they should solve. However, it’s hard to shift attention away from stressors. “It’s similar to a tangled knot of string,” she said. “Even though it’s not the time to pick at it, you can’t leave it alone until it’s done. Rituals can help with that by giving something concrete you can do. Sometimes having something that is focused on an action or having something to do can help people.” If you’re one of the many people who have a hard time focusing when it comes to the holidays, you’re not alone, said Meyer. “Life is CONTINUES ON PAGE 26 u u u

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CONTINUES FROM PAGE 27

chaotic, so if we can slow down to pause and enjoy the moment we’re in, it’s easier to focus on the blessing,” she said. “The brain is always on and if you’re focusing on anxieties of the future and past, that’s when you can’t enjoy things. Rituals and traditions can impact our ability to find peace in the present.” To help focus on the present and blessings around the holidays, Meyer encourages people to think about themselves and try to remember what they did in childhood that brings back positive memories. If you’re looking to start your own tradition or ritual, assess if it is meaningful, based on your personal values and whether or not you enjoy it. “As a kid, what do you remember about the holidays?” Meyer said. “Is it a family get-together that you remember? What would be meaningful that you can do as a family or a group that you can start now? Thoughts influence feeling and then influence behavior. In time, those can turn into beliefs.” Haala also suggests finding a way that a ritual has meaning, because when people engage in group activities or behaviors, the more meaning they find attached to it. The result is fostering a group

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cohesiveness, which is effective for mental health because it has a positive purpose behind it. She said that when people do something that involves a community or giving, it helps to ease stress and anxiety in one’s personal life. “It seems to be that when people engage in acts that make

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them feeling part of a group, it’s rewarding because it makes us feel better about ourselves and gives us a sense of meaning in society,” she said. “It helps people to feel better because it’s very powerful to feel like you’re giving back.” Though beginning to focus on rituals and traditions around the holidays may help connect with blessings, Meyer advised that there will be struggles at first. “We picture the perfect holiday and how you expect it to be, but know that it may not be perfect, and even that can result in something positive,” she said. “You can also reflect on something that is joyful in your life – past or present – and that can be a ritual, too.” Whether it’s celebrating over a big dinner, attending a play or talking about your favorite holiday memories, traditions and rituals play a big role in impacting people’s thoughts feelings and behaviors. “They can be really beneficial to children,” Haala said. “Research shows that kids who grow up in families that have traditions tend to sleep better, have less behavioral problems and are happier in general.” Anna Vangsness works in the healthcare communication field in Mankato and is a freelance writer. She resides in New Ulm with her husband.

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to Ramon and his business Ruf Acres Market for winning Faribault’s inaugural Downtown Business Challenge!

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Ramon Rodriguez Carrion is the owner of Ruf Acres Market. He can be reached at (@ Ramonsfoodsense) or (@Rufacresmarket).The market is located at 220 Central Ave, Faribault.

his is a traditional Catalonian soup served Christmas Eve and during the holiday season. The Galet pasta in this soup is a particular shape and in my family, my mother tried to find a larger size Galet each year. The joke in the family was that one day the Galet would be larger than the soup bowl. (NOTE: Since Galet pasta is not available locally, you can use any large shell-shaped pasta.) As is typical in Spain, the broth for the soup is usually made from scratch using a bone - beef bone in this case. I think of this as cooking with love, but it also means you capture all that nature provides us from the basic

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ingredients themselves. If you have a jar of your favorite, natural, high-quality beef “bone broth,” you can use this to save a bit of time.

Escudella Soup Serves 2 to 4 people

For the broth, you will need the following: 1 beef bone 2 chicken drumsticks 4 carrots 1 parsnip 2 potatoes 1 slice of Pancetta 1 clove garlic 3 celery stalks 2 tsp. salt 1 Tbsp olive oil 1 tsp. green peppercorn 2 bay leaves 3-½ quarts water Cut carrots, potatoes and parsnip in half. Combine all the ingredients above in a pot and cover. Bring to a boil, then simmer for 2 to 3

save the date

hours as you prepare the following to finish the soup: 8 oz of large Galet pasta (a large shell shape), or another pasta if you prefer ½-lb. grass-fed ground beef (enough for 8 small meatballs) 1 small bunch parsley Based on the number of people (2-4), you can adjust the amount of pasta and number of meatballs you will add; keep in mind, this soup is meant to have a ratio of 2:1 pasta to meat. Measure out the pasta you will use and set it aside to be cooked closer to serving time. Form your ground beef into small meatballs (1-1¼ inch in diameter) and set aside without cooking. Chop the parsley and set aside. After the broth has been cooking for 2 to 3 hours, remove the vegetables and bay leaves so only the broth remains. (NOTE: You can set aside the cooked vegetables and chicken meat if you want to create another meal such as a mash or puree.) Check the cooking time of your pasta and prepare to have the broth boiling again when you add the pasta, meatballs, and parsley. Add the pasta, meatballs, and parsley to the boiling broth and cook together so that the pasta has finished cooking at the desired serving time. Serve when ready.

Fennel Salsa In the holiday season, we will be eating quite a bit of food. Fennel seems to be a forgotten food or bulb.

This dish can add some healthy benefits to your diet. Fennel is known to help cleanse the body, since it has a diuretic effect on the body. A salsa made from fennel is both tasty and healthy and a great addition to any meal. Ingredients to make 12 oz. of salsa: 1 fennel bulb 1 tsp. pink peppercorn 1 tsp. Himalayan salt (or Celtic sea salt) 3 large bunches of parsley ¼ cup of wine ½ cup of olive oil Cut the fennel in small pieces (can be long or small pieces; it does not need to be diced). Put the pieces in a small baking tray and add the wine, salt, and peppercorn. Bake, uncovered, for 20 minutes. When the fennel is finished baking, add it to a large bowl along with the parsley, wine, olive oil and the juice from the tray and use a hand blender to chop and mix all together until has the consistency of a salsa. (If you prefer, you can cut the parsley bunches a bit before adding so that it is easier to mix with the blender.) Serving Suggestion Roasted Pumpkin or Butternut Squash Slice, remove the skin and roast several slices of pumpkin or squash after drizzling them with olive oil and adding a pinch of salt. When cooked, lay out the roasted slices on a small plate and add the Fennel Salsa on the side and spoon a small amount of Fennel Salsa on the pumpkin for appearance.

Heidi’s ClubHouse

Put yourself 1st by joining us on the 2nd Sunday, Monday and Tuesday of each month! 2nd Sunday of each month we will have “Clubhouse Crafts”: bring a project and come and enjoy a Sunday afternoon crafting or just come and socialize. 1-4pm 2nd Monday of November we will have “HC - Sharing and Caring”: a small group atmosphere for support and guidance through life’s more serious times. 5:30-7:30pm 2nd Tuesday of each month we will continue to have “Heidi’s Clubhouse”: Organic Networking for women to get to Know, Like and Trust one another. 5:30-7:30pm Please register on Eventbrite as space is limited. *all of the gatherings are free, but any donations are gladly received.

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A man’s perspective

In Times Like These…

I jonas Trent Jonas is a Twin Cities-based writer and divorced father of two. He is fascinated and frightened by women but is working through his issues.

gf “Her heart. How she treats others.” – Leanne E., Faribault

e Get Festiv with

n this issue, we’re looking at (among other things) how we help individuals through acts of philanthropy, volunteering, and other means. And it sure seems that we could use such acts of human compassion and kindness today more than ever. As I write this, fires are raging in Northern California, destroying lives and homes. These infernos arrived in the aftermath of the massacre in Las Vegas, the destruction resulting from Hurricanes Irma and Maria in Puerto Rico, the Virgin Islands, Florida, and the Southeast, and the horrible flooding caused by Hurricane Harvey in the Houston area. Other than the sheer scale of tragedy, these events have one other distressing thing in common: Politicization of the government responses needed to help the people who suffered or are suffering from these events. Why should helping people or responding to a tragedy be a political issue? It most definitely should not. But unfortunately, examples of callousness have come from both sides of the fence: Whether in Puerto Rico where the most visible government “bounty” was tossed to them in roll form, or from a liberal media executive (now fired) who suggested that the Las Vegas concert goers somehow deserved to die because of her pre-

sumption of their political leanings. Sadly, plenty more examples exist. It’s in times like these -- when we can’t count on getting all the organized support we’d expect from government, media, or other entities due to finger-pointing and infighting -- that we need to step up as individuals. When first-responders were ordered to stay back from the danger zone in Las Vegas, brave individuals risked their own lives to get others to safety and to help wounded victims. Grass-roots movements across the country are seeing this tragedy as the last straw in the gun control issue and are raising their voices in an attempt to do something about a system that lets a man amass that much firepower and then get it into a hotel room. Meanwhile, citizens and businesses across the country are stepping up to get supplies and volunteers to Puerto Rico, Houston, Florida, California, and the Southeastern U.S. after this year’s devastating natural disasters. In times of need, humans must help humans. The power of individuals to make a difference is a key tenet on which this nation was founded. Helping others is not a political act – it’s a human act. And these days, we can certainly use a lot more humanity in the world.

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WHAT’S IN A NAME While many people know Hans Christian Andersen’s story as “The Little Matchstick Girl,” Hauman and Carlson Drake said they deliberately chose to re-title their production as “The Matchstick Girl” to focus more on the girl as a character and not a diminutive caricature. “For me, ‘The Matchstick Girl’ puts more emphasis on the child herself, rather than the ‘little,’” Carlson Drake explained. “This has more emphasis on the individual.” “It pays more attention to the struggle this young person goes through,” Hauman added.

The

Matchstick Girl Mankato Dance Company Showcases Unique Christmas Production

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By Grace Webb

t’s New Year’s Eve, and a poor little girl is wandering the cold city streets, desperately trying to sell matches for a few meager pennies. She’s cold and hungry, barefoot and bruised. When no one buys her matches, she huddles in an alley, afraid to go home and face her abusive father. Instead, she starts lighting the matches one by one, dreaming happy visions like giant Christmas trees and decadent holiday feasts. Finally, the light from the matches fades away—and so does the little girl, following the spirit of her grandmother into glory. It’s not exactly a rosy holiday tale—so it may come as a surprise that If you go Riverfront Performing What: The Matchstick Girl Arts in Mankato is putting on an original play based When: 7 p.m. on Dec. 2, 3 p.m. on the short story for its on Dec. 3 Christmas performance. Where: Mankato West High “Hans Christian Ander-

School Auditorium Cost: $12 for adults, $8 for youth and seniors For more information: www.riverfrontartsmn.org/ children-s-musical

sen’s point is that this world can be harsh, [and] it can be cruel,” said Amanda Hauman, who adapted the play and is helping to direct it. “The world is so busy, you often can’t even see the true things, the real things, the warm things, like faith and love.” Yet, Hauman adds, there is also hope to be found. “This girl has a hard life, but then she has these little visions that keep her going,” she explained. “And in the end, her grandmother comes from heaven and takes her into glory. She does die. You do have this dead child on the stage… but it’s the continuation of faith and love.” Riverfront Performing Arts in Mankato has classes in dance, music and theater, and always puts on a special holiday show in December. Its staple has been “A Northwoods Nutcracker,” which retells the classic Nutcracker story with real Minnesota characters in a Minnesota setting. However, director Annmarie Carlson Drake said that she wanted to do something different this year and involve acting students from the school’s theater department, which is a relatively new department. “I wanted to do something to involve actors as well as dancers,” she said, pointing out that last year’s holiday production was much more dance-heavy. CONTINUES ON PAGE 36 uuu

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Carlson Drake and Hauman originally planned to produce another version of the Little Matchstick Girl, but the play they found was too extravagant and fantastical for their tastes. Instead, they eventually decided to adapt their own version and stick closer to the original story. “If you’re going to keep the tale, especially since Hans Christian Andersen was writing from a Christian lens, you can’t keep the death part of it without getting to the Christian narrative that he was doing,” Hauman said. “You either have to chuck it all out and start with something different, or keep it and try to be a little more pure about it so that it makes sense.” Hauman adapted the play in only one day, which she says is mostly because there was so little dialogue to work with. “It’s very precise and to the point,” she said. “There’s no brilliancy on my part. It was literally just boiling Hans Christian Andersen’s text down into [a theatrical version].” Still, the production will be a feature-length event, with dance sequences arranged around the main storyline. About 10 characters are involved, from kids to adults, and another 26 dance students are participating in the dance sequences. Rehearsals started in October. Carlson Drake arranged and directs the choreography, as well as choosing music, focusing from the Baroque Period to help establish that “classic” feel. Featured composers include Bach, Vivaldi, Tartini and Handel. Hauman, meanwhile,

handles the acting sequences. “It’s kind of dark… especially for this young actress [who stars],” Hauman said. “We had to work at getting her prepared, helping her to see the scope of being cold and alone and sad on the outside but still having burning hope on the inside. She’s doing a really good job.” In fact, while most of the cast is made up of kids, Hauman said they’re all still able to be professional and put on a great show. “We always underestimate young people, but they always pull it together,” she said. “They know that this is their time, their opportunity to improve. It doesn’t take a lot to focus back in and do the work, which is amazing.” Grace Webb is a wandering reporter whose home base is Mankato.

INTERESTED IN CLASSES? If you’re interested in theater, music or dance classes, Riverfront Performing Arts probably has something for you—whether you’re a kid or an adult. PHONE NUMBER: 507-469-4351 EMAIL: info@riverfrontartsmn.org WEBSITE: www.riverfrontartsmn.org ADDRESS: 155 Chestnut St., Mankato

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By Grace Webb

magine you’re deep in the heart of the Amazon rainforest, backpacking with your friends during your summer vacation. As the dense trees give way to a clearing, stunning Mayan ruins sprawl out before you. You eagerly rush to explore them, but it turns out you’re not the only ones there—this is an archeological site, and you’re trespassing. The archeologists handcuff you and your friends together and lock you in a room until the authorities can come arrest you. They’ll only let you out, they say, if you help them solve some ancient Mayan riddles. Can you do it in time? If solving mysteries like this one sounds

like a fun way to spend an afternoon, then you should check out a local escape room. Escape rooms offer players a chance to fully immerse themselves in a scenario—whether it’s a retro post office, a laboratory, or even a witch’s kitchen—as they scramble to solve riddles and unlock puzzles to escape in time. Mankato has two escape room groups—Old Town Escape and Kato Escape Room—that each offer players a different twist on the escape room idea.

Old Town Escape Old Town Escape is Mankato’s first escape room, opening in February 2016. It was created by a team of siblings—Michelle May, Colleen Depuydt and Kathleen May - along with Colleen’s husband Russell and Michelle’s husband, Chris Larson. The group got the idea after visiting

an escape room during a family vacation to Park Rapids in 2015. “The whole way back we were talking about what would we do if we had an escape room,” Michelle May said. “We just decided to do it.” After finding a building in downtown (“Old Town”) Mankato, they started brainstorming scenarios. The first one they created was the Post Office, which revolves around an early 1970’s post office and the disappearance of its postmaster. Players get “locked” in the office’s back room and have to figure out cryptic puzzles in time to makes sure the mail can still be delivered on schedule. “We started actually by finding interesting items, and we built a lot of puzzles off the items we found,” Colleen Depuydt said. “We scoured antique shops and stuff like that.” CONTINUES ON PAGE 36 u u u

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CONTINUES FROM PAGE 37

Next came the Witch’s Kitchen, where players are tasked with exploring a mystical kitchen, summoning the four elements and mastering different puzzles in order to become a witch’s apprentice. (While the scenarios for both rooms involve a “locked” room, groups are never actually trapped in a room. People can leave at any time.) There’s also the Oracle’s Tent, a pop-up experience that only takes about 15 minutes and is meant for smaller groups of 2-3 people. The tent can be rented for events such as weddings, high school dances and corporate events. In addition, there’s a mini game comprised of suitcases with puzzles

inside, which can be used for team building events. “The creative process of making the rooms is definitely the fun part,” Colleen Depuydt said. “Plus seeing how people have fun and how they respond to the puzzles. It’s a different experience every time with every group.” About 50 percent rate of success in the Post Office room and roughly the same in the Witch’s Kitchen. But that also depends on how many hints a group wants—groups can ask for as many or a few as necessary. “We really enjoy feeling immersed in the experience, and a large part of that is making sure the hints and the guidance fits in well with the experience,” Colleen Depuydt agreed. “We take a lot of pride in trying to

make the hints not just be, ‘Do this now.’ We try to make the hints an additional part of the puzzle. Every group needs hints.” Each escape room offered by Old Town Escape is good for pretty much all ages, with a lot of business coming from family groups of grandparents, parents and kids. “Sometimes it’s hard to find something for families to do that people of all ages will like, that’s not passive like watching a movie,” Colleen Depuydt said. “This not only gives you something to do together, but it’s really engaging and interacting, and it allows a family to work together. It’s a good bonding experience. It’s not just the experience when you’re in the room, but all the re-hashing afterwards. It makes for some good stories.”

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Michelle May added that the rooms have enough puzzles and riddles in them that everyone is able to participate. “No one is meant to do something by themselves,” she said. “And with most groups, each person has at least a tiny moment of success that they get to feel good about.”

Kato Escape Kato Escape opened in March 2016 and already features three unique rooms: Ivan’s Room, the Tubes Lab and the Mayan Escape. It’s the brainchild of Elizabeth and Jason Hanke, who first learned about escape rooms during a date night in the Twin Cities a few years ago. While they enjoyed the concept, they found that was a bit difficult to include their children in it because the cost was per person, which can add up quickly for families. In addition, since they didn’t book the whole room but only their spots, they were

never sure who else would be in the room and whether the group would be good for kids. Because of this, they decided to really focus on family-friendly fun, including the ability for groups to have the whole room to themselves. “When you’re mixed in with other people, that’s harder for families,” Elizabeth Hanke said. “We specifically wanted to cater more to families and friends, amongst themselves.” Hanke said that different rooms have different origin stories. For example, with the Mayan Escape room, they built the entire scenario around the skylight in the middle of the ceiling, which seemed similar to a flat Mayan pyramid top. With the Tubes Lab, the whole thing was built around the idea of tubing in the ground. Kato Escape also has a portable version of the game: an electronic suitcase that can be brought to houses or events and contains

puzzles to solve. And they’re already working on a fourth room, “Directive 42,” which focuses on a presidential directive to save the world from the energy crisis. Hanke said they have to always look forward to the next room idea, since it’s difficult to attract people back once they’ve solved all the riddles. “Typically, you don’t do it again,” she said. “It doesn’t change much. So we’ve just been adding rooms.” Different rooms also focus on different sorts of challenges. Uncle Ivan’s room has a lot of “find this” sort of challenges, which can be great for young kids. “If you’re not a problem solver, or if you’re a young kid, the finding aspect is great, because anyone can find things,” Hanke said. “The game is really in the control of the people who’re playing. You can always ask for clues if you get stuck. Some people want to do it without any clues, and other people just want to escape. We don’t limit clues at all. It’s mostly about having a good time.” CONTINUES ON PAGE 40 u u u

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Old Town Escape Where: 403 N. Riverfront Drive, Mankato Website: www.oldtownescape.com Phone number: 507-779-7799 Cost: $25 per person

Kato Escape Room CONTINUES FROM PAGE 39

And, Hanke adds, just about anyone can have a good time in these rooms. “We see a lot of people with grandparents, parents and kids,” she said. “It’s hard to find something

that an 80-year-old can do with a 6-year-old. Most of our rooms are diverse enough to fit most age groups.” Grace Webb is a wandering reporter whose home base is Mankato.

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Where: 619 S Front St, Mankato Website: www.katoescape.com Phone number: 507-327-4045 Cost: $75 for the room (with additional costs for larger groups)

After Thanksgiving Sales and Vendor Show

Saturday, November 25th, 2017 Another great event is being organized at Indian Island Winery for Saturday, November 25. This Sale day will consist of lots of local vendors showcasing and selling their products. This is a great way to support local small businesses on Small Business Saturday and purchase wine and gifts for the upcoming Christmas Holiday! Santa will also be here to listen to your Christmas wish lists, so feel free to bring your kids and your camera!! Free admission today! What a fun afternoon of sipping on wine while you shop!

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From Waseca: Hwy 14W to Smith’s Mill, left on Cty Rd. 37 for 5 miles

Janesville • 507-234-6222

Reviews for Old Town Escape “We had so much fun being novice detectives going from one clever clue to another until we found our desired objects... We are still smiling days later. The creators of this must be brilliant!!!” - Diane H. “This was the most fun ever!!! I loved the Post Office room and I wish I had a time machine so could experience it for the first time all over again. I can’t WAIT to play the Witch’s Kitchen the next time I’m in Mankato! Seriously, if you haven’t been to Old Town Escape yet, cancel today’s plans and go!!!” - Carly L. “Tell me the last time, as an adult, you did something completely new and different...this is it.” - Alecia A.

Reviews for Kato Escape Room “To celebrate Ivan’s 6th birthday we escaped ‘Great Uncle Ivan’s Office’ after finding his will. We made it out just as time ran out. The boys had a blast and can’t wait to try escaping another room. Kato Escape even gave Ivan a free t-shirt for having the same name as the character of the room.” - Jena Schoenrock “We’ve gone to big name escape rooms in Orlando and decided to try this one while on vacation in MN. We had a BLAST! It was so well done and was equally as fun as the big name escape room we visited before. We will definitely do it again! So much fun!!!” - Andrea Rhodes

“We had such a great time! 3 adults and 3 kids with wildly varying interests and abilities, and we ALL had a great time.” - Jena’e Abraham

STAGING SERVICES:

• On-Site Consultations • Vacant Home Staging • Re-Design Services • Color Consultations 6 step process for selecting paint choices • Personal Shopping Services • Young Living Packages Kelly Harbal - 507-200-0248 Certified Color Expert Certified by HSR & Staging Diva

klhomestaging.com NOV/DEC 2017

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Food for All

By Sarah Osterbauer

ood has become bigger than simple necessity in recent years. There’s a food blogger on every (virtual) corner, food competitions on mainstream television, and all the ingredients for a full meal can be delivered to your door at the click of a button. You can grocery shop online, at Target, at a co-op, at a natural foods store, from a CSA (Community-Supported Agriculture) or the Farmer’s Market. The options for buying and consuming food have widened considerably. At the root of all these options, what people want most, or seem to value most, is healthy food at a reasonable price. Luckily, one organization in the Twin Cities is helping people with that goal. Fare For All (FFA) is a Twin Cities-based non-profit food share program that serves anyone – yes, anyone – who is looking to purchase fruit, vegetables and meat at roughly 40% off retail prices. Yes, that means cheaper than Aldi, cheaper than Super Target and

cheaper than Walmart. How do they do it? FFA is similar to a CSA in that you purchase food as a mixed package, for a lower price than you would at the grocery store. They operate on a model similar to a co-op. They purchase the food in commercial quantities and they pass the savings directly to customers. They focus solely on fruit, vegetables and meat. They offer a produce pack ($10) or a meat pack ($11). You can also purchase a mega meat pack ($25) or a combo of produce and meat ($20). Produce packs come with about 15 pounds of fresh fruit and vegetables, and meat packs come with four packs of frozen meat items. In addition, there are holiday packs available in November and December for $30 each. They contain most of the fixings for a holiday meal, including a turkey in November and a ham in December. Packs do not need to be pre-ordered (except for satellite sites) and they currently have 50+ express sites. They have two trucks that make two stops daily, Monday through Friday. They operate at each stop for two hours,

CHAMELEON 7

Burkhartzmeyer shoes www.burkhartzmeyershoes.com

Downtown Faribault

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507-334-7774 OPEN MON. & THURS. TILL 8 p.m.

relying on the labor and skills of dedicated volunteers to help customers. The organization was originally called Fare Share and was founded and run by a St. Paul-based non-profit called Ramsey Action Program. They started with 20 sites and grew it to over 200. After a rough spot in the 1990’s they ended up turning the business over to the Emergency Foodshelf Network, now known as The Food Group. In 2007, they re-branded as Fare For All and were able to eliminate the need for pre-ordering. In the last five years, they have also increased the size of their produce pack from 10 pounds to 15 pounds, while keeping the price the same. This brought them soaring sales. For program director Scott Weatherhead, this was the signal that people were clamoring to buy healthy food, but could not afford to do so. This solidified the importance of a program like FFA, which strives to make healthy food affordable for all. The key word is “all.” Weatherhead said the biggest misconception people have about FFA is that it’s a program for low-income or

THE LIGHTWEIGHT HIKER BUILT FOR HEAVY PACKING.

special needs individuals and families. On the contrary, anyone may shop at a FFA site and they welcome everyone sans judgement. “If you have to take a bus to get there or if you pull up in a Lexus, we want EVERYONE to shop at Fare For All,” Weatherhead said. “The more people who buy from us, the more we are able to keep costs low.” At the FFA site, someone will help you find what you need, they’ll put it in a cart for you and even carry it to your car. FFA also works with a nutritionist who designs recipes for the food in the packs, so if you get a cut of meat or a vegetable that’s not familiar to you, they’re there to help you. Part of the pride Weatherhead has about the program stems from the amazing people who volunteer for them. “People show up smiling. They’re happy to be there helping people,” he said. In addition to the unbeatable prices, he says the customer service is what keeps bringing people back. In that way, it’s also a community building program, friends and neighbors com-

ing together to help one another. Weatherhead said that, at its heart, “It’s really a people helping people organization.” It’s easy to see why a program like FFA is so popular and continues to grow. Weatherhead said this year they have maxed out their resources and are taking a necessary nonexpansion year. They are out of freezer space and have only two trucks and two drivers, with 30 cities on a waiting list to get an FFA site. It’s a great problem to have, he said. Even given those limitations, he’s still working with communities to try to get food to their city. For example, when a group from Faribault wanted to get an FFA site, but were faced with limited resources, they opted to create a satellite site. Satellite sites take pre-orders and then buy packs from a standard site and transport the goods themselves to their own site. In this case, the Faribault group bought their food from the Northfield site and brought it back to Faribault for distribution. So even when they’re not expanding, they’re doing every-

gf “Her story. The struggles we go through as women, moms, sisters, etc. these struggles make us stronger.” thing – Sharon H., Northfield they can to get the most food to the most people. If you’re interested in finding a FFA site near you, or would like to volunteer for them (they require no set time commitment) visit www.fareforall.org. Sarah Osterbauer is a freelance writer based in St. Paul.

Angel’s Attic Gift Shop

at District One Hospital part of Allina Health Open Monday - Friday 9:00 until 5:00

Holiday Décor and More!

The Staff at Winters Plumbing & Heating Inc. wishes you all a Happy Holiday Season! THANK YOU for your business!

Winters Plumbing & Heating Inc.

110 Ferry St. • Le Sueur | 1-507-665-3056 | www.wintersplumbing-heating.com

MOTIVATION is what gets you started HABIT is what keeps you going.

Decide. Commit. Succeed.

Be stronger than your excuses!

Your Total Gift Shop Experience Angel’s Attic purchases help to raise funds for District One Hospital Auxiliary.

Let Us Help You!

Where you can have it all...in one location Weight Management • Personal/Sports Performance Training • Group Fitness Classes Wellness Coaching • Kids’ Corner Child Care • Professional Staff

1400 Cannon Circle, Suite 6 | 507-333-5430 | fitforlifemn.com

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Design opportunities through

LED

ow that LED technology has been on the market for a number of years, I feel its place in design can be more fully realized. There are a number of benefits to LED lighting â&#x20AC;&#x201C; the most significant ones being energy efficiency and sustainability. However, other important changes occurred in the lighting industry that augmented design at the same time. Often, these smaller advances are overlooked when finding the biggest, best, and most cost effective options for our home. One significant benefit to switching to an energy efficient and cooler-running tech is the ability to use brighter bulbs in older

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lighting

Ian Laird, LS

Ian is a Lighting Specialist at The Design Element, located in the Mankato Design Center. He can help you with all your lighting needs from planning to product selection. sockets. This gives us the option to essentially retrofit current fixtures. However, since optimal light was obtained through only a few stringent designs with incandescent, new fixture designs often utilize and sometimes require LEDs to function. This doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t mean that putting brighter LED bulbs into a small 3-light dinette fixture

will automatically solve a lighting issue in the room. Oftentimes too much light from

one concentrated source can create glare, cause color distortion on surfaces, and induce sharp shadowing in the far reaches of the space. Light layering and proper dispersion of light sources is always recomSPONSORED BY mended when The Design Element possible. What 1711 Premier Drive this situation does allow for Mankato, MN is less-obtru507.345.8708 sive lighting using smaller fixtures while keeping the same output as larger, former designs. This is achieved by using products such as disc lighting, shallower and smaller recessed fixtures, new innovations using tape lighting, and much smaller and less invasive step lighting options. Color temperature (CT) and color rendering (CRI) are two terms with much impact on the appearance of a space that many people did not know about; a concern in the era of incandescent (or even fluorescent lighting) since there wasn’t an option. Color temperature and color ren-

dering are important values in determining the colors of a room. The color temperature (measured on a Kelvin-based scale of light intensity) is usually a value anywhere from 2,400 to 6,500. When talking about LED lighting, 2,400 presents as an amber color similar to a low-watt incandescent. And 6,500K appears as an intense daylight “blue”. The value of 2700K is often used for a warm white LED and is the color of the brightest incandescent bulbs. The CT we have seen become the “norm” is 3000K, or bright white. This is largely due to both its higher light output and its reduction of a warm tint to the space. CRI is a value based on incandescent light. The top value of 100 is based on the brightest, ideological halogen lights or natural daylight, both a form of incandescent light. Often, LED light is judged on its ability to accurately render red light. A low CRI can greatly distort the true colors of an object – with LEDs and CFL (Compact Fluorescent Light) this means a blue or green tint. Likewise, low-light incandescent tints colors red. Knowing these values and what they mean allows for the manipulation of colors or “moods” that a designer may be

trying to achieve in the overall look. Similarly, color temperature (even with a high CRI) will appear warmer or cooler from the source. Commercial lighting is thought of as stark and cold, typically being in the CT range of 3500K to 4500K. This is best for detailed tasks and general bright ambient, light. In contrast, residential lighting is typically in the 2700K – 3500K range. This creates a warmer, more traditional, look and feel. However, for a more modern vibe 3000K can also be used residentially. The 3,500K CT is also available by request when the maximum amount of light output is desired. I hope this was helpful in explaining some of the variables that go into choosing light in the 21st century. LEDs are a superior replacement to older lighting in almost every way. They’re brighter, more energy efficient, and don’t emit UV radiation. For design, their versatility through adjustable light intensity and light manipulation is unmatched by other technologies. Now, what to do with all this fluorescent lighting? Don’t get me started.

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WELLNESS

The Prison Yoga Project. prisonyoga.com

Making a difference in the world through yoga “If you don’t like something, change it. If you can’t change it, change your attitude.” – Maya Angelou

By Rian Dicke-Michels

ith what seems to be never-ending chaos in current events, it seems only fitting to discuss ideas on how we can make the world a better place. Philanthropy is defined as the desire to promote the welfare of others and is often expressed by the generous donation of money to good causes. Up to this point, I have written numerous articles on how yoga can benefit your life, but what if I said that yoga could also change the world?

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When we do yoga, it can morph into a practice of mindfulness, self-love and the art of non-reaction. In a perfect world, there would be more peace between strangers. That starts with learning how to regulate emotions. The yoga community seeks to share a mindset that fights the good fight. Yoga Behind Bars is a nonprofit organization and one of a dozen programs that brings yoga to jails, prison, and juvenile detention centers. This organization, based in Seattle, has 102 volunteer yoga instructors who offer rehabilitation to men, women and teens who live in a negative and high-tension environment. Often criminals are people just like you and me, but who have made mistakes that caused them to lose their freedom. Yoga Behind Bars works to teach inmates non-attachment, how to feel emotions without reacting to them, and how to focus on the good things that will eventually help them reenter society. As the inmates shift their thinking, they’re free to rediscover goodness and humanity. The foundation also offers teacher training programs to inmates that allows them to become leaders from within and recruit others who may not have otherwise tried yoga. Robert W. Coleman Elementary in West Baltimore brought yoga and meditation into their school when the principal saw that suspending her pupils meant sending them home to various unfortunate and unhealthy situations. She got in contact with Holistic Living Inc. to offer yoga classes at school. Since teaming up with the organization, the elementary school issued zero suspensions last year by replacing detention with meditation. Students are redirected and taught skills to deal with anger, stress, and frustration. This creates a strong foundation for educational success for the student. The children are less impulsive and not as reactive, thus giving them more opportunities for their future. Boston-based Yoga Hope works specifically with abused and traumatized women. Their attendees range widely from social workers, to stay-at-home moms, to inmates. Studies have shown that women who take yoga classes are less likely to turn to drugs or alcohol, and the organization’s goal is to empower oppressed women who deserve healing so they may turn around and make a difference in the world. Bent on Learning, established in 2001, works in New York City with inner-city children to become healthier and more balanced. Research they’ve done through the program has found a 93% decrease in violence and aggression in their students, as well as higher academic test scores and improved emotional responses. Children are in their prime for education and Bent on Learning aims to teach selfcontrol so that students may succeed. The Give Back Yoga Foundation brings yoga to disenfranchised communities and welcomes people to get involved by volunteering in the community. They have two programs: Mindful Yoga Therapy and the Prison Yoga Project. The first works specifically with veterans

Bent on Learning. bentonlearning.com

who struggle with PTSD, brain injuries, etc., to bring them to a place of calm in order to develop healthy coping mechanisms. The second helps men and women find themselves so they may turn their lives around after incarceration. Yogis around the world see people and events through a lens of love and kindness that allows them to work light into their communities. The beauty here is that you don’t have to be a practicing yogi to care about the well-being of others. Anyone can be an everyday hero simply by accepting people as they are, without judgement, and doing what is within their power to bring about change for those who are less fortunate. When we donate our time or money to nonprofits and organizations that make a difference for other people, we are doing right by those we never see or will never know. But in doing those things we are also doing right by ourselves, for our own humanity.

Emotion, both good and bad, is a human experience we all can relate to. I encourage you to find mindfulness within yourself, so that we can spread that light outside of ourselves together. We like to talk about what we would do if we could move mountains; why not start with pebbles and stones? So much can be done with an open heart.

Rian Dicke-Michels is a highly independent, Minnesota State University Mankato graduate and the proud mother of an earthy 5-year-old. Although a 10-year yoga practitioner, she earned her 200RYT in 2015 from The Green Lotus Yoga and Healing center, and is continuing her education toward 500 hours. “My life is a continuous journey toward healing and self-love,” she says, “I’m honored to share it with you.”

“Inside – smile.” – Peg S., Faribault

Happy Holidays from Nicollet County Bank

Please join us for our

The Staff of Nicollet County Bank

Holiday Open House Friday, December 8th • 2-4 pm

St Peter High School Swing Choir singing from 3:00-3:30 PM Cookies, Coffee & Cider will be served! 2018 Calendars on display in our lobby.

Eight designs. Free, but limit one per customer, please.

www.nicolletcountybank.com • 220 South Third Street , St. Peter · 931-3310 • Like us on Facebook! NOV/DEC 2017

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Unexpected CaregiveR

How to Create a Less-Than-Perfect Holiday

Berit Kari Berit is author of The Unexpected Caregiver, where you can find more detailed information about appreciating yourself. Follow her at www.KariBerit.net

o you silently suffer from “Compassion Fatigue,” the tendency to risk your own health for the sake of others? There is a very fine line between putting others first and making yourself sick by always putting yourself last. Now come the holidays and those of us who are caregivers want to create “the perfect holiday” for our loved ones because, “this may be the last.” I hear you. I get it. But this kind of thinking is just what your animal brain loves. It’s where your “fight or flight” response lives. You want to create a flawless holiday event and with all the demands that accompany an unattainable thing, your animal brain goes into panic. The more you try to make this holiday the best, the more you will demand of yourself. You enter into a never-ending loop, repeating the same panicked message of “not enough” over and over and over. This setup is a disaster for creating the “perfect” holiday, let alone anything resembling easy and relaxed. You’ve also set aside your needs, adding another level of stress. At this critical juncture you can become overly tired and avoid anything

“Beautiful. What is beauty? Really, beauty is one’s opinion. Some might say your smile is beautiful, or your eyes are beautiful. Are they? Or is that how you’ve decided to see the world? Beauty comes from within. You have the power of how you decide to perceive it!” – Savannah S., Owatonna

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to do with the care of your loved one. You unconsciously build a wall between them and you. You may want to be loving, but if you begin to build a case for resentment, you start to see the care receiver as the problem. Give yourself the gift of breathing this holiday season. When you notice that you are panicking, berating yourself for not doing enough, stop. Take a deep breath and then ask yourself, “What am I feeling right now?” Bring attention to the here and now. This will stop the endless tape, allowing you to interrupt the mindless flow of unsupportive and untrue gibberish coming from your animal brain. After naming your feelings, ask yourself what you need. Write it down. Write down several thoughts. Then call a friend and let them know what they can do for you. It’s hard to ask another person to do something for you. Even asking your best friend isn’t easy. It may feel uncomfortable, but they will probably be happy to have a specific action to take or item to purchase for you. I have a number of friends who are caregivers. I want to help, but it’s burdensome to guess at what they may need done or want from me. Remove some of your burdens and theirs this holiday season. Be courageous and bold and ask for help.

WATCH FOR OUR JANUARY/FEBRUARY ISSUE which will focus on balance and weddings: Workplace success: - Co-existing with and enjoying different generations in the workplace

Southern Minn

JAN/FEB 2018 Have an idea or suggestion?

Contact Beth Forkner Moe at bfmoe@ southernminn.com

To ADVERTISE

Girlfriends

- Dealing with workplace bullying - “Organic networking” for women

Contact Pam DeMorett by email at pdemorett@ faribault.com or call 507-333-3117

• Dealing with anxiety in ourselves and our loved ones • From eating disorders to life as an international model • Family goal-setting • New wedding traditions • Turning wedding “bloopers” into good memories • Non-traditional weddings

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BOOK REVIEW Book Review – “Caroline: Little House, Revisited” By Sarah Miller c.2017, Wm. Morrow $25.99 / $31.99 Canada 371 pages

Review by Terri Schlichenmeyer, The Bookworm

‘Caroline: Little House, Revisited’

acking stinks. Wrapping up all your things, cushioning breakables, putting things where you won’t find them for months. Ugh. Is it worth it to have a new home? A new life? As asked in “Caroline: Little House, Revisited” by Sarah Miller, is the sacrifice worth a new beginning you’re not sure you want? She loved him so. Looking at her husband, Charles, Caroline Ingalls saw the light in his face as he spoke. She knew he’d heard that the government was selling Kansas farmland at reasonable prices, just as she knew how he wanted that, and an adventure. His eyes told her that he also wanted her permission, and she loved him too much to say no. She hadn’t informed him yet that their family would increase by one, come summer. She barely knew it herself, and she couldn’t imagine giving birth without family nearby. Still, she could never deny her husband his heart’s desire, so she said yes to making plans, to packing their belongings in a canvas-topped wagon, to estimate what supplies they might need for their travels. They’d depart from Wisconsin in late winter, when the river was still frozen solid. They would be in Kansas by mid-summer. It was cold when they started: five-year-old Mary and three-year-old Laura needed mittens until they reached the southern part of Iowa. Caroline’s own quilts ensured the girls’ comfort; supper often came from an open-pit fire. They might go days without seeing anyone but each other and oh, how Caroline missed her sister! She missed her little cookstove, the rocker that Charles made for her when Mary was born, and the feel of solid floorboards. She missed everything there was to miss about Wisconsin, but the state was weeks behind her. In front of her was a promise, and

“Women are all unique. Size, shape, color and story. Beauty is all of those qualities and we should show it loud and proud no matter what.” – Ashley H., Medford

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Author Sarah Miller

a husband who sang when he was happy. She imagined a garden, and crops spread beneath a big sky dome, family, new friends, and a new baby. She could also imagine danger… Remember being thrilled by tales from “The Little House on the Prairie”? If you do, then author Sarah Miller has this: there’s another side to the story and in “Caroline,” it’s no less exciting. At the outset of this novel, you know you’re in for something good. Miller makes this a love story, first: Charles and Caroline Ingalls are sweetly bashful and still courting, even though, as this novel opens, they’ve been married a decade. Caroline adores her husband and her girls, but Miller lets her be flawed: the title character is unsure of herself, prone to seethe silently, and there are times when she briefly wishes she was childless. Truly, that introspection drives this novel as much as does the new world Caroline encounters, making it a perfect addition to a beloved story. In her afterword, Miller explains how she used Laura Ingalls Wilder’s books to make a “marriage of fact and fiction,” and fans are going to love it. If you grew up devouring “Little House” books, the pages of “Caroline” pack a great story. -The Bookworm is Terri Schlichenmeyer. Terri has been reading since she was 3 years old and she never goes anywhere without a book. She lives on a hill in Wisconsin with two dogs and 12,000 books. For more information, visit bookwormsez@gmail.com.

9TH ANNUAL IRIS

TURKEY

TROT NovEMBER 23rd • Thanksgiving morning Faribault Middle School - Rain, SNOW, or SHINE! 704 17th St SW · Faribault, mn

5K Walk • Chip Timed 5K & 10K Runs Gobble Wobble • Tot Trot

Early Check-In & REGISTRATION:

November 22nd Faribault Middle School Gymnasium 4:00 - 6:30PM OR Day of Check-In & On-Site Registration: 7:00 - 8:00AM

Event Times:

8:00AM Gobble Wobble / 8:10AM Tot Trot / 8:30AM 10K Run / 8:35AM 5K Run / 8:40AM 5K Walk

www.irisRemembers.org Register before Nov. 9th to get a t-shirt!

Prizes for all kids and top male/female in each age category!

5k & 10K IRIS

Presented by

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WOMEN’S EXPO

To everyone who attended this year’s “Hello Beautiful!” women’s expo on October 15th. The turnout was great and we hope everyone had a great time. We are especially grateful to Joan and all our wonderful vendors!

Stay tuned for next year’s event! 52

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