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A Sorry Day Arithmetic Challenge by Pastor Ray Minniecon 27 May 2014
T
here is an old African proverb that says, “Whether the elephants are feasting fighting or making love, the grass always gets trampled on.” I am writing this article on Sorry Day 2014. I am writing today because I am deeply disturbed by the social and political directions that we are being led into and by recent debates and comments made by our leaders, especially in relation to the time spent on ‘sorry business’ among our communities. From my perspective, every day is Sorry Day for my people. As an Aboriginal Pastor, I am constantly called upon to conduct funerals for my people. It is very difficult for me to refuse this responsibility when our people are at their most vulnerable. This year alone, each week, I have been called upon by our people to assist them to lay their loved ones to rest with a culturally appropriate ceremony, in all parts of New South Wales and Queensland. One of those funerals included my own brother. Like some of my fellow Aboriginal Pastors, we can be called upon to attend to approximately fifty or more funerals a year. Walking with my people from one graveside to another graveside, can give one a different perspective on the future direction that we are being led into as First Nations Peoples, by our political leadership. I will only discuss one of the most important issues to me from a graveside perspective. Sorry business. My personal experience and observations of sorry business have led me to conclude that this matter is one of the most serious issues
Pastor Ray Minniecon has put a cost on funerals our mob attend on a regular basis. Image: sydneymedia.com
we face as a people. Consider the following personal observations. Firstly, the arithmetic around the cost of Sorry Business. It is important to do the arithmetic around the cost of living and the cost of dying for an Aboriginal family. The monetary costs of funerals are quite expensive. My conservative estimated cost of a funeral for an Aboriginal family would start at around $10,000.00, depending on where the funeral takes place. This would include casket, funeral home fees and a plot. There are other costs that need to be added to these basic costs. Some of those added costs include, travel and food costs for families who come to pay respect to the grieving family. A more realistic figure can be estimated at around $15,000.00 per funeral that is placed on each Aboriginal family when they experience the loss of a loved one. In my experience and observation, the number of funerals that a family and a community experience in a year are very high and difficult to estimate. My estimation based personal observation and experience is that the average number of funerals an Aboriginal family attends each year could be as high as one funeral per
month. If you take my conservative estimate of $10,000.00 per funeral and put that into a yearly cost, then an average Aboriginal family could be looking at an extra $120,000.00 cost per year to pay for basic funeral costs. What isn’t factored into this cost is the cost to time off work and school. Also, the recovery time needed to grieve the loss of a loved one. Many families grieve without the support of qualified grief and trauma counseling services that are necessary to support the grieving family to help them get back on their feet again. Those Aboriginal organisations that do offer this service are over stretched and under resourced. Another serious matter that I have observed at our funerals is the number of children who attend funerals. At a conservative estimate, I would assert that it is possible that an Aboriginal child would attend at least 100 funerals in their life, before they leave primary school. My personal observation and deep concern is that our children grow up in families where grief and trauma are seen as ‘natural and normal’ parts and life-ways of growing up and living as an Aboriginal in their country.
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The under resourced mental and wellbeing developmental needs of our children are another hidden cost to Aboriginal families during Sorry Business times. There are other hidden cost that could be included in association with the arithmetic of Sorry Business for Aboriginal families in Australia. Secondly, the arithmetic around the cost of Living. Secondly, on the other side of the arithmetic of Sorry Business, is the arithmetic of the cost of living. Many of the Aboriginal families I have contact with are on social security benefits. For an average Aboriginal family of five, on social security benefits, the average income per family per year, would not exceed $60,000.00. The challenge for each of those Aboriginal families is to meet the shortfall brought about by the loss of a loved one. That cost could be estimated to be another $20,000.00 and above per year. When one tries to analyze the arithmetic around those of us who come away from the graveside and find the strength to try and ‘get back on track again,’ then the cost of living and the cost of dying per Aboriginal family becomes more pronounced. On the income side of ledger, it would be very difficult to find any Aboriginal family with an average income of $80,000.00 to $120,000.00 per year. Unfortunately, I know Aboriginal families who are trying to pay off their funeral expenses to the local funeral directors and funeral homes, with their welfare payments or salary deductions. I find this sinister situation an oppressive financial burden on Aboriginal families, and a situation that our present day leaders are not taking into serious consideration. I have not mentioned the
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A Yamatji funeral covered by FNT earlier this year. Image supplied
different types of incidents that bring about a death in an Aboriginal family. Nor have I mentioned the age of the loved ones I have laid to rest. These matters are quite well researched and published and are an ongoing blight on this nation’s attitudes and behaviors toward my people. Also, I have not included the other burdens of grief and traumas and that many of our families face on a daily basis, when they return from the graveside. Which includes, dealing with traumas as a stolen generation member. Having a family member incarcerated. Having a child removed under the new Child Protection Acts implemented with impunity on grieving Aboriginal families. These are added burdens to the cost of living and the arithmetic challenge that Aboriginal people have to make survival choices about daily. My reason for writing this short article was an attempt to briefly outline the arithmetic challenges that Aboriginal families make from one graveside to another. It is also a challenge to our leaders to seriously consider the mathematical challenges that our families have to consider in order to survive on
a daily basis. There is no thought or discussion about entitlements around the graveside. Our people are trying their best to find the energy and strength to grieve for their loved one. If there is one experience and observation from the graveside that gives me hope, it is the incredible resilience, love, hope and faith that I witness and receive from my people around the graveside, in spite of the loss of a loved one. When I look back at the Aboriginal leaders of yesteryear, I am always encouraged by the fact that they meet with their people around the graveside. Around the graveside they gave us hope and faith that together we could make a better future for those of us who remain. They inspired us to continue to maintain our cultural roots and identity. They encouraged us to continue to fight and struggle for justice, because this is what those who have recently passed, and our ancestors, require of us. They reminded us that truth will always be our greatest weapon in the face of fierce odds. Perhaps these are the only weapons we have left to defeat the elephants.