Ican’trememberwhichone ofusisthebadinfluence.
Theperfectcombination betweenexerciseand swearing.
IfIknewIwasgoingtolive thislong,Iwouldhavetaken bettercareofmyself.
Timetopourmyself anotherbottle.
Youknowyou’regettingoldwhen “friendswithbenefits” meanshavingsomeone whocandriveatnight.
ourfeelingstonight?
Thekitchenwouldbeclean ifpeoplewouldstopeating here.
FrownedUponToBeInAStore WithNoBra,Sweatpantsanda GlassOfWine.
DM3-017 HEYMONDAY
DM3-016 Theproblemwithbeingso openmindedis, mybrainkeepsfallingout.
DM3-014 Well... Apparentlyrockbottom hasabasement. DM3-015 TalkBirdietoMe
DM3-010 I’mtoo soberfor thisshit. DM3-011 Noonewilleverbeas entertainedbyus asus.
Ifwegetcaught... YouaredeafandI don’tspeakEnglish.
Adaywithoutwineislike... Ihavenoidea.
Corksareforquitters.Iwasborntobewild... Until9pm
MymindthinksI’m16. MyhumoursaysI’m5. MybodythinksI’mdead.
Myfriendsaremyvoiceof reason,sprinkledwithabitof goodcrazy.
Iwon’tberememberedas thewomanwhokeptheer mouthshut.
Wineislikeducttape... Itfixeseverything!
DM1-363 BeachForecast: SunnyWitha100% ChanceofDrinking.
DM1-364 ICanHeartheOcean. It’stellingMetoFinda Sandbar
DM1-365
DM1-369
Beachaholic Shorehelpswithmysanity. AlcoholGoesIn. WisdomComesOut.
Comeoutofyourshell. BeShoreofyourself. makewaves andSeasTheDay Procraftinating Workingoncraftprojectswhen youshouldbe doinghousework
It’sabeachandbooze kindaday. BEach Happy Nope. Nottoday.
DM1-370
Feelingbeachykeen. IcanbeachALLday.
DM1-375 I’msogoodataging... I’veturned252-ishtimes.
Youknowyou’regettingoldwhen “friendswithbenefits” meanshavingsomeone whocandriveatnight.
Iflifeknocksyoudown... Staythereandtakeanap.
DM1-355
Fightforyou!
DM1-356
I’veofficiallylost mymindand I’mtootiredtolookforit.
DM1-359
Neverunerestimatea womanwitha pickleballpaddle.
PickledBall
DM1-357 I’mtryingtocutdown onmyswearing. Let’sseehowtheF@#! thatgoes!
DM1-360 Pickleball.. Theperfectcombination betweenexerciseandsweaing. DM1-361 Over-served andcausingaracket.
Imeditate.Idoyoga. Istillwanttosmack someone.
Apparently“wine”isnotan appropriateanswerto “Whatmotivatesme”
DM1-358
IfIknewIwasgoingtolive thislong,Iwouldhavetaken bettercareofmyself.
DM1-362 Tennis...
Theperfectcombination betweenexerciseandswearing.
Whenthedogthinksyou’ve hadenoughwine.
I’magrownasswoman. IcandowhatIwant.
IknowwhatyearIwasborn but...I’mbadatmath... SoI’llguessmyage.
Ifyouwanttostaysober... Don’tcomeover.
Beingafunctionaladult everydayseemsabit excessive.
IthinkIneedtostop consideringwineasafood.
So...Shouldweeatordrink ourfeelingstonight?
DM1-326
HappyPlace
DM1-327
DM1-321
RestingBeachFace
DM1-328
OooohCabanaBoy...
DM1-329
Onvacationuntil furthernotice
DM1-319
I’vecompletelymasteredthe abilitytoforgetwhatIam doingwhileI’mdoingit.
DM1-022
Corksareforquitters.
Thekitchenwouldbe cleanifpeoplewould stopeatinghere.
DM1-330
Idon’tgiveaduck... I’mgoingtothebeach.
DM1-013 Ithinkmyguardianangel drinks.
DM1-316
Bitch,Iwillputyouina trunkandhelppeople lookforyou.
DM1-331
I’llhaveasideofbeachwith mymorningcoffee.
DM1-020
ThemorepeopleImeet,the moreIlikemydog.
DM1-008
Wineyourwayoutof abadday.
DM1-026
WhatIplanned... Whathappened...
DM1-011
Noonewilleverbeas entertainedbyus asus.
DM1-027
MymindthinksI’m16. MyhumorsaysI’m5. MybodythinksI’mdead.
DM1-012
That’sahorribleidea. Whattime?
DM1-028
Iwasborntobewild... Until9pm.
Friendsarelikethighs.... Alwaysstickingtogether.
DM1-032
IShopOnlineBecauseIt’s FrownedUponToBeInAStore WithNoBra,SweatpantsAndA GlassOfWine.
SomeDaysIAmaze Myself...OtherDaysICan’t FindMyGlasses.
WithoutCoffee,IWouldn’t BeThePerky,FoulMouthed DelightfulPersonThatIAm. Ihaveafabuloustherapist... Hernameis MaryJ.Wana
Allgirlfriendshavethatone crazyfriend.Ifyoudon’t knowwhoitis, it’sprobablyyou.
weweren’tsupervised
IsLike... IHaveNoIdea.
DM1-109
SomeDaysIAmazeMyself. OtherDaysIlookForMy PhoneWhileI’mOnIt.
DM1-122
IDon’tThinkBeing anAdultisGoingto WorkForMe.
DM1-138
DM1-114
IWasNormal... ThreeCatsAgo!
DM1-124
Mytrainofthought leftwithoutme.
IAmOneCocktail AwayFromWell... AnotherCocktail!
DM1-139
DM1-120
MyGirlfriendsSupportMe BetterThanMyBra!
DM1-128
NewPhilosophy... Idon’tgivea*#@!
It’sImportanttoBe PositiveinLife...RightNowI’m PositiveINeedALargeGlassof Wine!
DM1-143
DM1-135
ThisWineTastesa LotLikeI’mNotGoingto WorkTomorrow.
DM1-132
DearWine,WeHadaDeal...You WereGoingToMakeMe Funnier,Sexier,andaBetter Dancer...ISawtheVideo...WeNeed ToTalk!
It’sExhaustingBeing Fabulous!
DM1-146
IDon’tWantToBrag ButICanStillFitInto TheEarringsIWore InHighSchool.
DM1-157
IfWeGetCaught, YouareDeafandIDon’t SpeakEnglish.
DM1-168
ThegoodnewsisIcanstill touchmytoes... Thebadnewsis,it’swithmy boobs
I’mOnlyAsStrongasthe CoffeeIDrinkandthe GirlfriendsIHave.
DM1-158
MyGirlfriendsareLike Fudge...MostlySweet WithaFewNuts.
MyMeasurementsAre TheSame...They’reJust TenInchesLower.
DM1-159 PartnersinCrime.
Ijustatemywillpower!
DM1-160
Wewillbefriendsuntilthe end...Nomatterhowbigour endsget!
Iwasplanningtobe productivetoday,butthenI gotonFacebook
Ittakesalotofballsto golflikeIdo. Imakewinedisappear... What’syoursuperpower?
DM1-300
Awomancannotsurviveon winealone... Shealsoneedsfriends.
DM1-161
We’veBeenFriendsFor SoLong,ICan’tRemember WhichOneofUsIsTheBad Influence.
DM1-301
DM1-302 Iwon’tberemembered asthewomanwhokepther mouthshut. I’mOKwiththat
Iknoweverythinghappens forareason... ButWTF? DM1-304
DM1-165
ILookedintheMirrorand wondered...What’smy Motherdoingthere?
DM1-303
Iwouldtotallygrowmy ownfoodifIcouldfind pizzaseeds
DM1-305
Myfriendsaremyvoiceofreason,sprinkledwithabitofgood crazy.
I’mdoingnothingtoday becauseIstartedyesterday andI’mnotfinished.
DM1-312
I’mneverdrinkingagain. Ohwait,there’swine.
DM1-306
Neverdependonsomeone tomakeyouhappy. That’swhatwine’sfor.
DM1-015
DM1-313
I’monlytalkingtomydogtoday.
DM1-307
Thekeytohappiness... Abadmemory
TalkBirdietoMe
DM1-019
DM1-314
Mom’sturntowine.
DM1-320
MySpiritanimalisa GrumpyCatwhoslaps annoyingpeople.
You’reBitchy.YouSwearTooMuch. YouGossip.YouHaveNoMorals. You’reeverythingIever wantedinafriend.
DM1-133 Shouldwehaveonemore glassofwine? Justonemore?Glass? Bottle?Barrel?...Vineyard?
DM1-315
Myfavoritewine? More.
DM1-318 Ihavekids.
DM1-111
SomeDaysShouldCome WIthaDeleteButton!
Iknowwhatyear Iwasbornbut... I’mbadatmath... SoI’llguessmyage.
DM2-309
IthinkIneedtostop consideringwineasafood.
DM2-310
WhyisMondaysofarfrom Fridayand FridaysoneartoMonday? So...Shouldwe eatordrink ourfeelingstonight?
DM2-311Dm2-312
Ifyouwanttostaysober... Don’tcomeover. DM2-010 Tan&Tipsy DM2-009 Warning Retiredpersonwith nothingtodo. DM2-011 HappyPlace
DM2-313
OooohCabanaBoy...
Onvacationuntil furthernotice
I’llhaveasideofbeachwith mymorningcoffee.
Awomancannotsurviveon winealone... Shealsoneedsfriends.
Iwon’tberememberedasthe womanwhokept hermouthshut. I’mOKwiththat
DM2-284
Iwouldtotallygrowmyown foodifIcouldfindpizza seeds
DM2-281DM2-287
Working9towine. Myfriendsaremyvoiceof reason,sprinkledwithabit ofgoodcrazy.
Iknoweverythinghappens forareason... ButWTF? DM2-289
I’mdoingnothingtoday becauseIstartedyesterday andI’mnotfinished.
DM2-293
I’mneverdrinkingagain. Ohwait,there’swine.
DM2-294
Thekeytohappiness... Abadmemory
DM2-288
(Ineedwine)
I’monlytalkingtomy dogtoday.
DM2-295
DM2-296 Myfavoritewine? More.
ThemorepeopleImeet,the moreIlikemydog.
DM2-020
Today’sGoodMood isSponsoredByWine.
DM2-050
DM2-122 IDon’tThinkBeingan AdultIsGoingTo WorkForMe!
Corksareforquitters.
DM2-022
ICantDealWithAnything WithTheRightDrink andMyGirlfriends!
DM2-105
DM2-124 MyTrainofThought LeftWithoutMe!
Fromaprocrastination standpoint... I’vebeenwildlysuccessful IwasBorn ToBeWild... Until9PM.
DM2-025DM2-028
IDrinkBecauseIt’sNot HealthyToKeep ThingsBottledUp!
DM2-108
DM2-128 NewPhilosophy... IDon’tGivea*#@!
DM2-114 IWasNormal... ThreeCatsAgo!
DM2-138 IAmOneCocktailAway From... Well...AnotherCocktail!
ADayWithoutWineisLike... YeahJustKiddingI HaveNoIdea!
DM2-233
WineisLikeDuctTape... ItFixesEverything
DM2-243
WithoutCoffee,IWouldn’t BeThePerky,FoulMouthed DelightfulPersonThatIAm.
DM2-259
FriendsUntilTheEnd ofWine!
DM2-235
ICame.ISaw.IHadStress ILeft.
DM2-253
Idon’triseandshine. Icaffeinateandhope forthebest.
DM2-262
PartnersInWine
DM2-241
DM2-256 IDon’tEvenBelieveMyself WhenISayI’llBeReadyIn 5Minutes.
DM2-264 FindMyPurpose? Atthisage,I’mluckyIcan findmyglasses
WineTakesThe BitchRightOutOfMe
DM22-242
WelcomeToTheShit Show...SponsoredByChaos, Caffeine,AndCurseWords.
DM2-258
DM2-267 IWishICouldLoseWeight AsEasilyAsILoseMy Glasses,Keys,AndMyMind!
Here’stoAlcohol Thecauseandsolution toalloflife’sproblems.
DM2-268
I’mtoosoberforthisshit.
DM2-274
DM2-278 Well... Apparentlyrockbottom hasabasement.
Wineyouwayout ofabadday.
DM2-271
Noonewilleverbeas entertainedbyusasus.
DM2-275
HeyMonday
DM2-282
RealQueens fixeachother’scrowns.
DM2-272
That’sahorribleidea. Whattime?
DM2-276
DM2-285 I’mOnlyAsStrongas TheCoffeeIDrinkandthe GirlfriendsIHave!
IDon’tWanttoBrag,ButI CanStillFitIntoThe EarringsIWore InHighSchool!
DM2-273
Ithinkmyguardianangel drinks.
DM2-277
DM2-286 NoCoffee, NoWorkee!
PackagingIncludedasShown PROUDLYMADEINTHEU.S.A.
PackagingIncludedasShown PROUDLYMADEINTHEU.S.A.
PackagingIncludedasShown PROUDLYMADEINTHEU.S.A.
PackagingIncludedasShown PROUDLYMADEINTHEU.S.A.
PackagingIncludedasShown PROUDLYMADEINTHEU.S.A.
PackagingIncludedasShown PROUDLYMADEINTHEU.S.A.
whichoneofusisthebadinfluence.
Pickledball
DM7-190
Imeditate,Idoyoga, Istillwanttosmacksomeone.
DM7-191
WhyisMondaysofarfromFriday andFridaysoneartoMonday?
DM7-203
Myspiritanimalisagrumpycat, whoslapsannoyingpeople.
DM7-005
Dogsmakemehappy. Humansmakemyheadhurt.
DM7-002
Whenthedogthinksyou’ve hadenoughwine.
DM7-194
I’vecompletelymasteredtheabilityto forgetwhatIamdoingwhileI’mdoingit.
DM7-004
Corksareforquitters
DM7-022
Friendsarelikethighs...Alwayssticking together.
DM7-024
DESIGNED&PRINTEDINTHEU.S.A.
IfWeGetCaught...YouAreDeaf andIDon’tSpeakEnglish.
DM7-157
Iwon’tberememberedasthewomanwho kepthermouthshut.I’mOKwiththat
DM7-168
Thekeytohappiness... Abadmemory
DM7-172
MyGirlfriendsarelikeFudge... MostlySweetwithaFewNuts.
DM7-158
Working9towine.
DM7-170
I’mdoingnothingtodaybecauseI startedyesterdayandI’mnotfinished. DM7-174
Awomancannotsurviveonwinealone... Shealsoneedsfriends.
DM7-166
Myfriendsaremyvoiceofreason,sprinkled withabitofgoodcrazy.
DM7-171
I’mneverdrinkingagain. Ohwait,there’swine.
DM7-175
