Imposter Syndrome: Questioning Yourself During COVID

The past twelve months have required all of us to reinvent the ways in which we relate to our jobs, and to do so quickly, as our homes, work, entertainment, and relaxation suddenly blended into one space. This unexpected, and sometimes messy, fusion has left many people questioning themselves and feeling unable to keep up with the different angles of pressure. As quickly as the lockdowns took effect, self-doubt was armed and ready.

What is imposter syndrome?

Anyone new to a career understands imposter syndrome. Doubting our abilities and feeling insecure in our new roles. We may not feel as capable as we actually are or as evidence has shown us to be. As therapists, we know about imposter syndrome very well. We start off in our careers feeling out of place and wondering how we could possibly be enough for our clients.

There are many reasons why even seasoned therapists’ imposter syndrome may be flaring up during the pandemic. COVID hit and therapists around the world were required to hastily turn their in-person practices to telehealth. We had to find HIPAA compliant methods of video conferencing, receiving payment, and securing our internet connections, amongst other technical challenges. I often say to people; I’m good with feelings, not technology. But whether comfortable or not, our clients needed us to act as if we were, and fast.

We also began supporting clients through a shared trauma. Every single one of our clients, our family members, our friends, and ourselves have been experiencing the same global pandemic. We are counseling clients through the fear, confusion, and unpredictability that we are currently going through. If there was ever a time that we could relate to our clients, it was now.

Just like many of our clients, we probably had a difficult time managing our personal lives during the pandemic. Just like our clients, our families may have faced financial struggles, illness, death, or navigating our living situations, etc. Our own nervousness, worry, sadness, and emptiness may have spiked. Perhaps we had our own mood swings and couldn’t manage our frustrations. How could we hold it together for our clients when we don’t know if we can hold it together for ourselves? Feelings of self-doubt creep in and we begin to feel like a fraud. It’s no wonder that we’re left questioning if we’re actually well-equipped at our chosen profession.

So what can we actually do to move through these feelings of not being goodenough?

Like we tell our clients, let’s start by gently normalizing these feelings of self-doubt and understand that everyone is riding these waves right now. These feelings are especially natural considering that we’re facing a completely unknown and unprecedented situation. None of us have ever had to reinvent our practices in the face of a global pandemic. Whether or not we have been practicing online previously, this is a whole new world.

Continue accepting these insecurities with radical self-compassion. In our profession, which is one of human connection and energy exchange, WE are the tools of our trade. There is an input and output of energy transferred between us when we sit with clients. We take on their emotions and our own emotions come into play in this relational work. If we’re hating on ourselves for not being ‘our best selves, ’ it makes our jobs even more difficult. As we have compassion for our hardships, we allow space for our emotions to keep moving instead of staying stagnate. Let’s create space for ourselves to come as we are, just as we do for our clients. This may not mean that anything actually ‘changes’ , it just means that we’re with ourselves and maybe we ruminate and beat ourselves up a little less.

We are people that help people and we also that need same help. Make sure to keep your own therapy sessions. Stay connected with your colleagues. Use your supervision and case consultation to receive clinical support. We need to turn to each other to remind ourselves that we’re not alone in these feelings. As we remind one another, it will become easier to remind ourselves, that we are working pretty hard and doing the best we can. And if we are finding that the weight of all of the obligations is becoming too difficult to keep up with, make sure to have a safety plan in place with your closest supports.

The trick of imposter syndrome is that it makes us feel like we are the only ones experiencing it. We begin to doubt ourselves and our skills. Layers of different variables challenge our sense of self. A global pandemic will certainly prove challenging for anybody, including therapists. Balancing out the insecurity pendulum takes a bit of action but it need not be intense. Gentle prompts of what we are accomplishing will help train the mind to focus on what we can do. Connecting with our colleagues will help us realize we’re not alone in questioning ourselves. And continuing to be kind and compassionate to ourselves, is the undercurrent that will allow us space to keep moving forward, together.

Written By: Brooke English, LCSW

Brooke English is a licensed clinical social worker and registered yoga teacher with over a decade of experience. She is in private practice remotely in FL and NY. Brooke specializes in seeing clients who have experienced trauma, specifically domestic violence or intimate partner violence. Brooke collaborates with her clients using holistic, energy-based somatic techniques to help them feel safe and empowered in their bodies and choices. Learn more about Brooke at www.bwellwithbrooke.com