06.07.11 by Folio Weekly

Northeast Florida’s News & Opinion Magazine • June 7-13, 2011 • Life After Kevorkian • 110,860 readers every week!

“Shut your piehole, Jacksonville!” An angry Bill Maher fan spouts off. p. 46 MOCA ﬁlm explores the complex lives of outsider artists. p. 32

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Volume 25 Number 10

18 MAIL Unions aren’t the problem; they’re the solution. Plus a Clay County resident blames “selfish scumbags” for spoiling the party on Wells Road. p. 4 EDITOR’S NOTE p. 6 NEWS Longtime courts reporter leaves the T-U after editors learn he’s been job-hunting on the beat. p. 7 BUZZ, BOUQUETS & BRICKBATS Gov. Rick Scott’s wife ignores the fact that her hubby nearly forced the closing of 53 state parks, and urges kids to visit them. Plus the worst (or best!) movie tagline evah. p. 8 Cover Story Local surfboard-makers fight to stay afloat in a sea of mass-produced competitors. p. 12 OUR PICKS Reasons to leave the house this week. p. 17

MOVIES Reviews of “The Hangover Part II” and “X-Men: First Class.” p. 18 MUSIC Swedish trio Junip joins Helado Negro at 5 Points Theatre, guitar god Dick Dale surfs into St. Augustine Beach. p. 23 ARTS FSCJ celebrates the work of the late Ann Holloway Williams, best known for her Haydon Burns Library mosaic. Plus MOCA screens a classic on Southern outsider artists. p. 30 NEWS OF THE WEIRD Punk rock dogs and recent Jesus sightings. p. 41 BACKPAGE Shut your piehole, Jacksonville! p. 46 I ♥ TELEVISION p. 10 SPORTS p. 11 HAPPENINGS p. 35 DINING p. 36 FREEWILL ASTROLOGY p. 42 I SAW U p. 43 CLASSIFIEDS p. 44 June 7-13, 2011 | folio weekly | 3

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More Perfect Unions

I was glad to read in your article regarding the Duval County School Board’s consideration of breaking its promise to its janitors, that their union is fighting back to see that these employees get a fair shake (News, May 24, bit. ly/jXI93j). We’ve heard some public uproar recently regarding unions, with many nonunion workers clamoring that union workers should have their compensation reduced to better match what nonunion workers make. I believe that this story illustrates why nonunion workers should be doing the exact opposite: They should take notice of these janitors’ ability to stand up for themselves, and begin to consider organizing their own workplace labor in order to acquire higher compensation and more bargaining power. Wages, when allowing for inflation, have been stagnant for most since the 1980s. The middle-class will continue to shrink and the working poor will grow unless workers unitedly fight back to ensure they get paid a living wage. Unions weaken the employers’ ability to cut pay, which is why the need for unions is more important now than ever. If you are not in a union, you should think about joining one or organizing one in your workplace. You’ll make more money, have better benefits and more security. Union workers don’t need to disassemble: rather, 2011 nonunion workers need to join them.

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Paul Zetterower Via email

Shut ’Em Down

Re: The Clay County Board of County Commissioners’ action to curtail alcohol sales on Wells Road (News, May 17, bit.ly/lSTCCM). I support the Board of County Commissioners’ action to try to get a handle on runaway crime and vandalism along Wells Road. I fully appreciate the unprecedented

I’m not so naïve to suggest that racism doesn’t exist, but false accusations have no place in a world where the vast majority of people are trying to move away from such inflammatory rhetoric. nature of the drastic step taken, but I also appreciate why this was necessary. The foremost concern of any government is the safety and security of the citizens. It is unfortunate for the businesses that the board felt it had no other option, but the residents of the community have rights, too. The fact that a business — of any kind — creates jobs does not mean that the surrounding community has to suffer a loss of their quality 4 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

of life so the business can continue. If these were factories pumping pollution into the neighborhood, the government would be responsible for curtailing it. I attended the meeting and was just as shocked as Commission Chairman Cummings was when the [clubs’] attorney made his wholly unfounded accusation about their action being racially motivated. Just because Clay County is a majority white community does not mean the board is racist. The U.S. population is majority white, too, but that doesn’t mean the federal government is racist. Being accused of being a racist is almost as inflammatory as being accused of being a child molester. It is a completely unsubstantiated accusation made by an attorney who apparently has no other argument to make, so he fell into the sad trap of blaming “the man.” Weak. Despicable. Irresponsible. I appreciate Folio Weekly’s “alternative” perspective and think that the paper often adds a fresh point of view to local issues. Unfortunately, in this case, I feel you are promoting a reckless and unproven accusation of racism. Simply because different races are involved in this situation does not automatically mean racism is part of it. Playing the race card is a worn-out tactic employed by those who aren’t smart enough to make an intelligent argument. I’m not so naïve to suggest that racism doesn’t exist in the world, but I do believe false accusations like the attorney’s have no place in a world where the vast majority of people — black, brown and white — are trying to move away from such inflammatory rhetoric. I wish this action to curb the sale of a legal intoxicant was not necessary. But, rather than bash the board, maybe the critics should work on a better alternative. I don’t want to trade Clay County’s quality of life (which includes a relatively low crime rate) for commerce that attracts some people who choose to ruin the party for the majority who just want to have fun. Don’t blame the Board of County Commissioners. Try blaming the few selfish scumbags who have no respect for anyone. Bill Garrison Clay Hill via email

Commish Kaput, Kapish?

Why can’t St. Johns County Commissioner Cindy Stevenson stop meddling in the administrative affairs of our county? Why can’t she understand the necessary divisions of responsibility and authority of those who serve in separate branches of government? Why must she continue to undermine the attempts of our other commissioners and administrator to have professional leadership at all levels of public service? Why, when our government is surfacing in clear water regarding transparency on staff appointments, does she attempt to drag us back into the murky depths of “Issues Group” administrative control? Why has she most recently attempted to torpedo St. Johns County business leaders along with our Administrator by casting what amounted to a NO CONFIDENCE/NAY vote regarding our recommended new staff appointment for economic development issues?

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Editorial Why must she continue to embarrass the BCC and herself with behavior which, if it were not so diabolical, could be dismissed as simply juvenile or misinformed? Well, here is your answer: MONEY! When I was your commissioner, I would say on almost a daily basis that the whole system is all about money. Your money! It is about who is

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Why must Cindy Stevenson continue to embarrass the BCC and herself with behavior which, if it were not so diabolical, could be dismissed as simply juvenile or misinformed? going to appropriate it, who is going to spend it and, most importantly, what it is going to buy. Cindy Stevenson, the last vestige of the “Issues Group,” must put up the good fight for the old gang. When your masters are ugly, your bidding is ugly. Our county spends hundreds of millions of dollars a year that formerly was controlled by virtually one commissioner through an administrative puppet. We are a real government now, save one commissioner. Eight years of Stevenson should be enough for any sane voter. But should she run again, and win, I’m leavin! Hey, wait a minute. That may be her strategy for getting your vote. Hmmmm … I’m stayin! Ben Rich St. Johns County via email

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Folio Weekly is published every Tuesday throughout Northeast Florida. It contains opinions of contributing writers that are not necessarily the opinion of this publication. Folio Weekly welcomes both editorial and photographic contributions. Calendar information must be received three weeks in advance of event date. Copyright © Folio Publishing, Inc. 2011. All rights reserved. Advertising rates and information are available on request. An advertiser purchases right of publication only. One free copy per person. Additional copies and back issues are $1 each at the office or $4 by mail, based on availability. First Class mail subscriptions are $48 for 13 weeks, $96 for 26 weeks and $189 for 52 weeks. Please recycle Folio Weekly. Folio Weekly is printed on recycled paper using soy-based inks. 44,200 press run • Audited weekly readership 110,860

JUNE 7-13, 2011 | FOLIO WEEKLY | 5

I’m Not There “I heard about some issues, but that was before I got there. People said certain things happened, but that happened before I got there.”

his is your Governor speaking, Florida; last Thursday, when asked about protesters being kicked out of his budget-signing ceremony. His comments, made a week after the incident, reflect his characteristic disinterest in matters affecting his non-supporters. During that week, he told reporters, he’d learned nothing about what had transpired, or why, and hadn’t come to any conclusion about whether it was right or wrong. Which is a little hard to conceive, since all of that information had either been reported or is readily available on YouTube. According to reporters at the event, Gov. Rick Scott staged a highly scripted budget-signing ceremony at The Villages — a conservative senior community in Sumter County — and asked the Republican Party of Florida to host, so as to make the event nominally “private.” Then Scott staffers and Republican operatives — including Scott’s $60,000-a-year special assistant Russ Abrams — combed the audience

permitted without police interference? It’s interesting, too, to witness Scott’s inability to put a name to what occurred, calling it “certain things” and “some issues.” This goes beyond even his usual inarticulateness, in the apparent belief that if he keeps his descriptions of the event hazy, it will somehow attach a cloud of uncertainty to the event. The governor ended his comments saying he would investigate. When a reporter took issue with that claim, noting “that was last week … why haven’t you looked into it [yet]?”

Scott staffers and Republican operatives combed the crowd looking for people holding anti-Scott signs. They then instructed sheriff’s deputies to remove those people, and they did. looking for people holding anti-Scott signs. They then instructed Sumter County Sheriff ’s Deputies to remove those people, and they did — about a few dozen in all. There is no mystery who did it, and really no mystery why. The governor wanted an audience scrubbed of opposition and dissent. He doesn’t do well when heckled (http://bit.ly/iTFnjs) or even when asked to answer simple questions (http://bit.ly/jGMgHj), and he exhibits a degree of social dexterity that falls on a continuum somewhere between Howard Hughes and Dick Cheney. Unqualified support is the only category of feedback he can tolerate. Hence the decision to trundle potentially controversial events — like signing the most draconian budget in living memory — far away from places that ordinary people might be, and into small pockets of Tea Party support, like The Villages. Still, it’s amusing to hear Scott attempt to deflect questions about the incident (watch his comments at http://bit.ly/jO9yp6) by observing that it occurred “before I got there.” Right. And so … what? Does the arrival of the governor’s motorcade trigger Constitutionally Correct behavior in his top staff? Is that the moment at which it becomes OK for citizens of this state to hold signs and silently register objections with his budget? Is that the moment that peaceful assembly is 6 | FOLIO WEEKLY | JUNE 7-13, 2011

the governor responded, “I haven’t had time. I mean, I’ve been traveling. … But clearly we’ll look into it.” If we had to guess the single-word conclusion of that inquiry — to be released several weeks from now, when the budgetsigning ceremony is long forgotten — it’s “misunderstanding.” No blame assigned, no harm intended, and seldom heard a discouraging word. That last part hasn’t happened yet, but the governor is working on it. And it’s no small irony. The fact that the Tea Party, which less than a year ago positioned itself as a wellspring of revolution, is silent on this — a mere backdrop for ceremonies where dissidence is squelched — is nothing short of a reverseengineered surrender. Those who’ve taken on the mantle of Bostonian insurrection owe more to the public debate than mute concession. There is no such thing as a “private” bill-signing ceremony, and no excuse for a governor who treats the state’s budget as partisan foolscap. Whether he likes it or not — whether we like it or not — Rick Scott is the governor of the entire state of Florida. His intolerance of dissent is only further proof of how much he needs to hear it. Anne Schindler themail@folioweekly.com

Public Information Officer Matt Bisbee continued to deny that former Times-Union reporter Paul Pinkham was working at the Public Defender’s Office, only confirming it after the Times-Union itself explained what had transpired.

Workplace Conflict

Longtime reporter leaves the Times-Union after editors learn he’s been job-hunting on the beat

he trial of former JaxPort Chairman Tony Nelson had everything a court reporter could want: raw power, greed and public corruption at the highest levels. It also tracked the unspooling of one of the city’s most prominent and seemingly successful African Americans, accused of bullying contractors into paying bribes. As far back as 2008, Florida Times-Union courts reporter Paul Pinkham was reporting on the story. By the time the trial began in May, he was covering it in full, posting stories on the newspaper’s website and fleshing them out in 1-A stories that appeared almost daily in the print edition. It was Pinkham’s story, from opening remarks on May 2, right up until the day Nelson took the stand on May 11. But the following day, well before the guilty verdict came down on May 20, Pinkham was suddenly off the story and off the courts beat. A week later, the veteran reporter was gone for good. After 20 years at the T-U, his name was removed from the staff list and his cell phone disconnected, with nary a word of explanation from the paper. Pinkham’s departure coincided with a fresh round of layoffs at the paper, but was unrelated. Instead, Times-Union editors yanked Pinkham off the courts beat when they learned that Folio Weekly was asking questions about rumors that he was going to begin doing investigative work for the Public Defender’s Office. Those rumors turned out to be true, but initial confirmation of that fact came, ironically, from the Times-Union, not the Public Defender’s Office, which repeatedly denied a working relationship with Pinkham. Even when they weren’t denying it, Public Defender Matt Shirk’s office staff was deliberately misleading, saying things like Pinkham wasn’t an “employee” of the office (he’s an independent contractor) or that he “doesn’t work there.” Folio Weekly received an anonymous tip on May 5 that Pinkham was either working or training for a job with the Public Defender’s Office as a mitigation specialist — someone who does research to be introduced at the sentencing phase of a trial. It seemed improbable that a reporter with Pinkham’s credentials would accept a job from an institution he covered as a reporter, and the Public Defender’s Office flatly denied it. Shirk’s $88,000-a-year Public Information Officer Matt Bisbee said on May 10 that the only document in the Public Defender’s Office related to Paul Pinkham (including emails, contracts, lists of vendors, notes from

conversations, anything) was a public records request Pinkham had submitted on Jan. 7, 2011. Bisbee added that Pinkham was not an “employee.” Asked if there were plans to hire Pinkham as a mitigation specialist, he replied, “There’s no plan to have a full-time mitigation specialist.” (There is no such position there as a full-time mitigation specialist; all work on contract.) Bisbee added that he couldn’t confirm whether or not Pinkham was working as a vendor or contractor doing mitigation or any other investigation. He acknowledged that such information constituted public record, but said he was instructed — presumably by Public Defender Matt Shirk— not to release any names. “We put together a defense team to go up against the state, and we don’t want to advertise our playbook,” he explained. But he also assured Folio Weekly that as far as Pinkham working for Shirk, “There is nothing there.” However, after an employee of the office spotted Pinkham wearing an ID badge around

Pinkham is now a contract employee of the Public Defender’s Office, doing mitigation research for the sentencing phase of trials.

the office on May 26, Folio Weekly submitted a written request (although public records requests don’t have to be in writing) asking for anything and everything related to Pinkham. Bisbee acknowledged receiving the request. Then he stopped returning calls. Finally, on June 1, Bisbee emailed Folio Weekly a contract that had been signed by both Shirk and Pinkham on May 18. It indicated that the former reporter had been hired to provide sentencing phase mitigation services from May 23 through June 30. The contract says it supercedes all previous agreements (although no other contracts were provided). Pinkham will be paid $50 an hour, up to a maximum 20 hours a week, with JUNE 7-13, 2011 | FOLIO WEEKLY | 7

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“The Hangover” Meets “American Psycho” — Catchy if counterintuitive tagline for the upcoming Jacksonville-filmed movie “Where I Begin.” (The trailer actually looks better than the tagline suggests. Watch it at http://bit.ly/mkQoez)

Night Moves “I go to bed at 10 p.m.” — Clay County Attorney Mark Scruby, explaining why he hasn’t seen firsthand the gangsters and gun-toting thugs who purportedly go to nightclubs larger than 4,750 square feet along Wells Road. Clubs which meet that description — there are three — were effectively put out of biz last month by a restrictive ordinance drafted by Scruby’s office and approved by the Clay County Commission (News, May 17, bit.ly/lSTCCM).

additional hours approved by Shirk. By that point, however, Times-Union Editor Frank Denton had already confirmed that Pinkham had resigned to go to work as a PDO investigator. Asked if it violated a code of professional conduct to seek employment at an organization he covered as a reporter, Denton admits it was awkward. “If somebody left the paper as a cops reporter, and left in search of a job, and then got a job at a police department, that wouldn’t be [an issue],” says Denton. “However, if a reporter were soliciting a job from people he or she covered, that would absolutely be an ethical problem. Or if there is any appearance of that. Our credibility is affected by appearances, and we have to insulate ourselves

from appearances.” Denton adds, “I can tell you that Paul did a great job for us and he did it for many, many years. It’s difficult. We will miss Paul. He’s a terrific reporter. I’m sorry that journalism and the Times-Union lost him. We will miss him and wish him well.” Folio Weekly tried to contact Pinkham on May 9 and again on May 31, without any luck. I also tried to reach him through reporter Jim Schoettler, who is said to be his best friend in the newsroom. But I didn’t succeed. “I’m writing a story about Paul Pinkham … ,” I began. Schoettler’s response? Click.

Endangered City The Florida Trust for Historic Preservation has designated all of downtown Palatka an endangered historic site. In the 19th Century, the town was a destination for tourism and steamships, as well as a transportation hub for freighting lumber and citrus. Today, the vacancy rate is growing and several historic buildings are in such bad shape, their roofs are caving in.

Confederate Memorial Day ceremony, St. Augustine, May 14

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Generation XYZ “Grandma’s singing with emo kids. It’s a total bonding thing.” — MetroJacksonville.com co-publisher Stephen Dare, commenting on the old-fashioned singalongs he once staged at his Boomtown restaurant and theater in Springfield and is now reprising on the first Wednesday of the month at The Jacksonville Landing during ArtWalk. Dare promises the sing-alongs will include everything from Right Said Fred to Aretha Franklin. 8 | FOLIO WEEKLY | JUNE 7-13, 2011

Susan Cooper Eastman sceastman@folioweekly.com

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Reading Into It Florida First Lady Ann Scott sent out a press release last week urging kids to read outdoors this summer, preferably at a state park. Scott’s “Summer Literacy Adventure” conveniently ignores the fact that her husband’s initial budget put 53 state parks on the chopping block, though public pressure eventually forced him to back away from closing the parks.

of benefit Jacksonville is No. 6 on a list itpromise really doesn’t want to be on. MSN.com reports Jacksonville is sixth on a roster of 15 cities where “home prices are still plummeting.” Seven of the cities are in Florida.

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Bad Haridopolos Day “Get him off my phone. I don’t want anything to do with this guy. Get rid of him.” — AM radio talk show host Ray Junior, giving Florida Senate Prez (and U.S. Senate hopeful) Mike Haridopolos the boot from his show after Haridopolos refused to answer questions about whether he supported U.S. Rep. Paul Ryan’s plan to dismantle Medicare. Junior, who appears locally on WFOY 1240 am and bills himself as “America’s loose cannon,” found his small-time show (it only airs in two markets) getting national attention For questions, please call your advertising representative at as a result, the FAX YOUR PROOF IF POSSIBLE AT 268-3655 story landing on Politico, Huff Po and PROMISE OF BENEFIT SUPPORT ASK FOR ACTION the Miami Herald.

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Over the Top “Planned Parenthood: The Hyper-Political, UnderRegulated, Out-Of-Control Mega-Marketer of Abortion” — One of the seminars slated for the National Right to Life annual convention, to be held in Jacksonville at downtown’s Hyatt Regency Riverfront on June 23, 24 and 25.

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Tissue of the Community “The absolute worst feeling is to have to look across the desk and tell people we can’t help them. We are their last hope, and I have given out more Kleenex this year than I ever have.” — Christa Figgins, development director for Jacksonville Area Legal Aid, talking about the unmet need for legal help among the city’s poor. Figgins made her comment in the Daily Record after Gov. Scott slashed the statewide budget for legal services for the poor.

Bouquets to Museum of Contemporary Art Jacksonville Director Marcelle Polednik for teaming with Healing Every Autistic Child (HEAL) to enrich the lives of children with autism. Through a collaboration called The Butterfly Project, students were paired with local professional artists and were able to experience blacksmithing, plein air painting, printmaking, sculpture, mixed media and photography.

Brickbats to Jacksonville Beach attorney Jeffrey Martin Hanly for failing to live up to the expectations of his clients and the rules of professional conduct. Hanly was suspended by the Florida Supreme Court for “appear[ing] to be causing great public harm by abandoning his law practice and misappropriating client trust funds,” according to an emergency order. Bouquets to Vietnam veteran Tyrone Jackson for honoring current military fathers in a most practical way. Jackson, who owns the Legendary Cuts salon in Arlington, will join instructors and students at the barber school at the Fortis Institute Jacksonville to give all active duty men free haircuts on Friday, June 17, from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m. to celebrate Father’s Day. The Fortis Institute Jacksonville is located at 5995 University Blvd., Ste. 2. Call 443-6300 for an appointment; walk-ins are welcome. JUNE 7-13, 2011 | FOLIO WEEKLY | 9

Goddamn Kids! G

oddamn kids! I’ll tell YOU the trouble with kids today. All they care about are their goddamn Pokey-Mans, iPods, Sunny D’s, Pop Rocks, Kid Bopz, Razor scooters, Internet porn, bear traps, sandwich fixin’s, IUDs, Elmo, karate lessons, Santa Claus, Katy Perry, Lady Goo-Goo, Shaun Cassidy, sexting, unicycles, jaguars (the animal, not the car), fist pumps, saxophone solos, binge drinking, caramel corn, raising the national debt ceiling, monster trucks, flash mobs, Pogs, Ninja Turtles, pizza pie, Dig Dug, Indians, mayonnaise, Pilates, graffiti, wedgies, swirlies, weight lifting, tongue piercing, Cracker Jacks … (DEEP INHALE) … fried shrimp, the MTV, go-go dancing, beat poetry, ice cream trucks, Steven Seagal, Japanese war memorabilia, pogo sticks, diamonds, Silly Bandz, Halloween and comfortable shoes. Oh, and kids’ TV shows! If you gave a kid a choice whether they’d rather watch “Hannah Montana” or an acclaimed documentary about the economic collapse of Wall Street

Because you’re gonna look like a goddamn IDIOT to teenagers if you don’t already know this, here are three shows debuting this week catering to the kidtarded tastes of today’s youth.

10 | FOLIO WEEKLY | JUNE 7-13, 2011

and the corrupt financial mechanisms that bilked billions out of bankers and hedge fund managers, they’d pick … wait … I’ve forgotten what the choice was. OH! They’d pick “Hannah Montana” every time! Because you’re gonna look like a goddamn IDIOT to teenagers if you don’t already know this, here are three shows debuting this week catering to the kidtarded tastes of today’s youth. • “My Babysitter’s a Vampire” (Disney Channel, Fri., June 10, 7 p.m.) A teen left in charge of his little sister screws it up, which leads his parents to hire a professional babysitter — WHO JUST HAPPENS TO BE A VAMPIRE?? WHAAAAT? Expect over-the-top acting, teeth-grinding puns and thinly veiled references to necrophilia. • “Kickin’ It” (Disney XD, Mon., June 13, 8:30 p.m.) The owner of the worst martial arts studio in the universe hires a smart-mouth wise-ass punk (and kung fu expert) to whip his students into shape. THIS IS A CRAP IDEA. Kids shouldn’t know how to beat up adults, and could make me hesitate before smacking the teeth out of their smart-mouth, wise-ass punk mouths. • “The Nine Lives of Chloe King” (ABC Family, Tues., June 14, 9 p.m.) Based on the tweeny book series, a teenager learns she’s descended from an ancient race of cat-people or something, and develops “enhanced speed, hearing, agility and the ability to climb objects using her claws.” Ack! That sounds like my ex-wife!! PASS. If kids REALLY want to watch something

good, they’ll tune into the HUB Network (check your cable/satellite provider for availability) which features tons of great cartoons from when I was a little smart-mouth wise-ass punk. Watch “Transformers,” “Where on Earth is Carmen Sandiego?,” “My Little Pony,” “G.I. Joe,” “Fraggle Rock” and the best kiddies show in the history of the goddamn universe, “Jem & the Holograms”! EEEEEEE!! So put that in your pipe and don’t inhale it, you smart-mouth wise-ass punks! Or if you’d rather, go on back to your goddamn roller skates, Justin Biebers, Hubba Bubba, PCP raves, slap bracelets, corn dogs, Malibu Barbies, Lisa Frank notebooks, yo-yos, Doc Martins, streaking, coonskin caps, Marlboro Lights … (to be continued next week).

TUESDAY, JUNE 7 8:00 BRAVO INSIDE THE ACTORS STUDIO Host James Lipton crams the studio tonight with the hilarious “Modern Family” cast members.

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 8 9:00 NBC AMERICA’S GOT TALENT Tonight’s auditions include a juggler, a magician and 100 other people with no discernable talent. 10:00 NBC LOVE IN THE WILD Two contestants decide to sneak off for some lovin’ in the bushes, with a python making it a threesome.

THURSDAY, JUNE 9 9:00 NBC THE OFFICE In this rerun, Michael is forced to be pleasant to his arch-nemesis (truly, a horrible monster) Toby. Midnight TOON CHILDREN’S HOSPITAL Briggs goes undercover in the children’s psych ward, which is filled with mini-Mike Myers.

FRIDAY, JUNE 10 7:00 DIS MY BABYSITTER’S A VAMPIRE Debut! A gorgeous teen vampire is paid to baby-sit a 14-year-old boy. SCORE!! 9:00 SPIKE GUY’S CHOICE AWARDS Celebrating stuff dudes like, AND the muchanticipated cast reunion of “Fast Times at Ridgemont High”!

SATURDAY, JUNE 11 8:00 NBC FIELD OF VISION (Movie) (2011) Bullies jeopardize a high school’s chances for football glory in this treacle-y TV movie that’ll probably encourage bullying.

SUNDAY, JUNE 12 9:00 OXY THE GLEE PROJECT Debut! Contestants compete to be in a sevenepisode arc on “Glee.” I’d rather guest star in the Holocaust. 9:00 ANI SWAMP WARS Debut! Why do we need to fight a war over a swamp? NOBODY WANTS A SWAMP.

MONDAY, JUNE 13 8:30 DISXD KICKIN’ IT Debut! A failing dojo is saved by a martial arts whiz kid, and “Kung foolery” ensues! GET IT?? 10:00 MTV TEEN WOLF Scott’s position on the lacrosse team is threatened by his secret werewolf lifestyle … or is it? Wm.™ Steven Humphrey steve@portlandmercury.com

Dustin Hegedus

Sportstalk

Jesus Camp

Private high school sports may be the future of athletics in Northeast Florida

ne of the great things about atheists is that they see organized religion through the eyes of the skeptic, treating it as a grift equivalent to pro wrestling or the derivatives market. Those of us successfully indoctrinated into the Christian tradition generally don’t have that kind of detachment. We excuse Joel Osteen and Reverend Ike and the like, because they, despite their excesses, share our creed. But what creed is that? Just as there are differences — in style, presentation, ethos, inherent morality — between Gordon Solie’s and Eddie Graham’s impeccably connected Championship Wrestling From Florida of the ’70s and ’80s and today’s “TNA” brand, there are differences between religions and the gimmicks they employ. On my mama’s side of the family, we have snake-handling preachers;

fired coach as a groundskeeper, then pushed him to assistant coach as an apparent quid pro quo. That’s good bidness, right there! Episcopal got off scot-free. A $5,300 fine — roughly equivalent to a year’s tuition for one paying student who lacks athletic skills — and the coaches have to attend a compliance seminar. Big deal. A chicken-crap penalty for what’s really a non-crime. Let’s look at this a different way. For weeks, everyone’s been moaning about the death of high school sports and the perfidy of the last two governors for forcing our city into having to make tough budget choices. Why not encourage Episcopal, Bolles, Providence, et al to recruit as broadly as they want? Why not let the private schools shoulder the burden of supporting high school athletics — we should just let the athletes

Why not let private schools shoulder the burden of high school athletics, and leave Raines, Stanton, Ribault and Mandarin to the business of educating? on my father’s side, quite a few Catholics who converted under duress. Two brands of Christianity, yes, but as different as you can get: the contrast of the sacramental wafer and the subjugation of the rattler. One interpreted through all manner of impermeable prisms, from the Latin Mass on down, and the other more like a tribal, visceral rite of passage. Both portals to a concept: salvation. The Episcopal Church falls somewhere between these two traditions. “Protestant Yet Catholic,” and unlike the domestic Catholic Church, it has a more liberal attitude, manifested through such things as the ordination of women and gays. In other issues, they apparently are quite liberal, also — such as reaching out past the boundaries of their religious mission to recruit athletes who haven’t been raised in the Episcopal faith, likely will not convert to the faith, and could be said to be at an Episcopalian school in some small part as a mechanism to increase the school’s athletic glory. The recent Florida High School Athletic Association sanctions against Episcopal High School in Jacksonville — for allowing ineligible players to play in three programs — underscore the ridiculousness of the high school sports racket throughout the U.S., where middle-aged adults live vicariously through children playing games. What did Episcopal do? In baseball, according to the FHSAA, they brought in a couple of ringers from Eagle View Academy in 2009, hired EVA’s

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get paid while we’re at it — and leave Raines, Stanton, Ribault, Mandarin, Wolfson and Lee to the business of educating America’s next leaders or Chinese serfs, or whatever they’ll become? The headlines suggest we’re never going to be able to subsidize high school sports again the way we did between WWII and Mission Accomplished. Goldman Sachs will tell you a gallon of gas will cost you five bucks in a few weeks. The dollar bleeds like Dusty Rhodes in a cage, while the Arab street is soaked with blood and the Taliban still Talibanizes half-a-world away, despite our decade-long commitment (and the 10 years the Soviets put in before that). Our way of life is predicated on casual benefits from the subjugation of others, but our yoke weakens each day. The world is telling us that our paper currency is better used as tissue than as legal tender — so maybe, just maybe, the government can no longer ensure little Bobby learns how to pass block in the name of school spirit. And maybe, we can let private schools be the money marks rather than labor under played-out delusions. The limited resources we have left are better spent on hard science and hard math education, so we can compete with the Asian countries who currently keep us afloat, and with emergent South American and African powers. Heads here ain’t ready for the 21st century, which is too bad. In the words of Peabo Bryson, “It’s a whole new world.” A.G. Gancarski themail@folioweekly.com JUNE 7-13, 2011 | FOLIO WEEKLY | 11

By Richard Wall • Photos by Walter Coker

roms are as thick as baitfish in the surf, darting to snag waves from high schoolers, who’re snaking waves from hungover 30ish dudes half-black with tats. A geezer with a longboard cuts three kids off a wave and glides left, trailing a bit of smirk. An alert surfer girl, all of 5 years old, takes that wave to the right, whipping hair and slashing face with moxie Willow Smith would envy. The beaches are busting with surfers already. And this year, there will be more than ever. The Florida Surfing Association estimates there are some 20,000 surfers in this area, and the number “is growing exponentially,” according to group president Paul West. Female surfing alone is providing a huge boost to the sport: In the last 10 years, the number of entrants in FSA surfing contests for women has increased by 700 percent. The sport’s surging popularity can be measured in its influence on popular music, film, even the flood of surf products in suburban shopping malls. One might think the trend would carry local surfboards like an easy swell. But that’s not happening. Back in the day, Northeast Florida shapers, as custom surfboard makers are called, owned about 80 percent of the market. Two decades later, they claim less than 15 percent — and some say it’s closer to 2 percent. Uniformly, local shapers blame the power of branding by big-name surfboards. Whereas it used to be a rite of passage to get your own custom local board, national or international competition has changed the equation dramatically. And 12 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

Local surfboard makers fight to stay afloat in a sea of cheap and foreign competitors it’s not about cost. For roughly the same amount of money — sometimes less — you can buy a locally made board of excellent quality, custom-designed for your body, skill and Florida’s puny waves. Alternatively, you can buy a nationally marketed, ad-blitz-buoyed Al Merrick, Lost or other big-name board made by a machine in Asia for completely different surf conditions. One can make you a better surfer, the other can make you think you look like a better surfer. Unfortunately, for local foam-shaving, fiberglassing craftsmen, most young surfers opt for the latter. The “pop outs,” as machine-made boards are called, are created using designs fed into a computer. They’re much cheaper to make, and although they aren’t significantly cheaper to customers, they offer surf shops much better profit margins. Established local shapers are mostly one-man (no women

are at this level locally) operations, with work done in a small shop featuring a shaping room and a fiberglassing room. They sell primarily custom boards ordered directly from them, with sales to surf shops making up a small part of their business — a sore point for local shapers. All are excellent surfers, whose wave time is seriously diluted by work. Most shapers purchase “blanks” — polyurethane foam templates of longboards, funshapes, fishes, etc., with a wooden stringer down the middle for strength. They sculpt the blank into a custom shape, generally working six factors: the twodimensional outline, the “rocker” or curvature from nose to tail, the “rails” or sides, the bottom’s contour, board thickness and fin placement. They add artwork and adhere fiberglass cloth to the board with polyester resin. Each shaper has his own style, technique and opinions. Folio Weekly recently sat down with five local board-makers who demonstrate some of the most interesting qualities of the craft: Mike Whisnant, considered the area’s best shaper, Dick Rosborough, a longtime legend, Jim Dunlop, a creative and popular shaper with a good surf shop hookup, the cutting edge Drew Baggett, and Tony Iannarone, who has his own shop and makes more boards than anyone. It’s not a complete list by any means, but it’s an index of some local shapers in the odd position of sustaining a craft in an era of booming surfing popularity.

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Dick Rosborough, aka Rozo Rozo Surfboards, Ft. George Island Output: 120 boards a year Available at Sunrise Surf Shop and rozosurfboards.com Interesting fact: Has ridden wake-waves made by the huge tankers that pass his dock near the mouth of the St. Johns River.

Rozo lives an Old Florida lifestyle, surfer version. His shaping factory is the garage of his Heckscher Drive home, along with a 200-yard lot that reaches to the river. This 60-year-old philosophical shaper/surfer is still considered The Man by some for his command of the local surf scene in the ’60s and his global fame in the ’70s. Rozo surfed his way into the 1970 world contest in Australia, and wound up in Hawaii shaping boards and surfing Sunset Beach. A tattered 1974 Surfing Magazine centerfold of Rozo zipping down a monster wave is taped to his shaping room wall. “Those waves will kill you,” says Rozo, who’s proud that his name still has cachet on Oahu’s fabled North Shore. “That’s what you want to do when you’re young.” Today he surfs the North Jetties break near his house. “I’m a fair-weather surfer,” he concedes. “I jump off if I get scared. I lazy-boy it.” He jokes that he sees a day when he’ll pay a caddy to carry his ultra longboard to the water. Rozo is comfortable in this peaceful stage of his life, enjoying time with his wife, Debbie, his animals, working in his impressive garden and fishing. They fish hard in the fall, often using a 12-foot cane pole from the lighted dock at night to pull out trout like frenzied tuna. On this afternoon, a Navy frigate is anchored in the Mayport basin across from the dock and chunky grey choppers patrol the sky, casting loud shadows over the sunny spread. Rozo muses on his career as a shaper, and suggests it’s his range that sets him apart. “If you know how to make a big board feel small and make a small board feel big, that’s the magic of shaping,” he says. Rozo often lends clients one of his boards so they can get a feel for what they might like. “When people pick their board up, they’re busting a smile because they’ve seen it being built. You can’t fake that smile,” says Rozo, adding that it makes him feel like a Christmas elf. “It’s that person-toperson trip that’s really my success. That’s what gives me the joy.” He’d like to spread more joy, but instead he’s spreading less. “Everybody’s getting eaten up by foreign competition from boards made in China,” he says. “It’s frustrating to see the sport become popular and local shapers not getting a piece of it,” he adds. But he believes the pendulum will eventually swing the other way, and Asian boards will be seen as less cool rides. “I

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think our saving grace is going to be when a kid in grammar school or high school says, ‘If you ride Chinese, you’re an idiot,’” Rozo says. “It’ll take peer pressure to get surfers come back to For to questions, buying local.”

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Mike Whisnant

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Whisnant Surfboards, Atlantic Beach 300 boards a year At whisnantsurfboards.com Interesting fact: Won the 2011 Florida Shape Off at the big Surf Expo, even though he was so nervous he practically gave up before he started.

Mike Whisnant specializes in high-performance shortboards, and to design your board just right, he has to be brutally honest. “I’m like your psychiatrist: Tell me the truth and you’ll get the right results.” The truth, he adds, means stripping away any ego. “First off, if you’re as good as you say you are, I would have heard of you,” says Whisnant, who has his own surf team. “I’m not going to judge you. My job is to get this piece of foam to work for you.” Whisnant runs a one-man factory on Atlantic Boulevard, where the unposted warning is “Don’t mess with my stuff!” His adult children long ago declined to help him out at the shop. He has five grandkids and likes NASCAR, especially if Tony Stewart is feuding with somebody. When Whisnant goes surfing these days at Jacksonville Beach, surfers recognize him and want to talk … and talk. Amiably aggressive but humble nonetheless, Whisnant says it still freaks him out to see his

“Everybody’s getting eaten up by foreign competition from boards made in China,” Rozo says. “It’s frustrating to see the sport become popular and local shapers not getting a piece of it.”

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JUNE 7-13, 2011 | FOLIO WEEKLY | 13

SHAPE SHIFTERS name on a board. He was the first shaper from Northeast Florida invited to the Shape Off, and he recalls thinking he was going to lose it inside the glass competition booth. “The pressure release came when a big-time shaper friend from California, Chris Christenson, came up and smacked the glass and stuck his face against it,” says Whisnant. “After that I was fine.” A master of detail, Whisnant takes pride in the artistry of fiberglassing. “There are people who glass, and people who laminate. I’m a laminator,” says Whisnant, busting out his signature rapid-fire laugh. “People who glass are new guys coming up, they don’t understand it. I get the best resin-to-clothto-foam ratio so you don’t have a lot of extra weight and you have a strong board that lasts and doesn’t de-laminate. You can’t know looking at a board; I can’t even tell. How you tell is by how long the board holds up.” Buyers generally have to catch up to their new Whisnant board. “I build it a little advanced

Jim Dunlop Mystic Surfboards, Jacksonville Beach 180-250 boards a year At Sunrise Surf Shop and mysticsurfboards.net Interesting fact: After he made a 4'10" pink surfboard for his 10-year-old daughter and she didn’t want it, he rode it himself for a year.

When told he’s considered by competitors to be among the more artistic shapers in the area, Dunlop dodges the compliment. “There is a lot of art in this, but it’s functional sculpture to me. It’s not real art, because you can use it for something that is really fun.” His favorite part is drawing the outline of the proposed board, especially if it’s a design he’s pulling out of thin air. “I’ve got boxes of those drawings in my garage,” says Dunlop, a UNF grad, father of two adult children, and hoarder of Clark Foam blanks, a now-defunct and much-beloved product that Dunlop says “shapes like butter. I pull one or two out a year.” For Dunlop, shaping is about constant change.

“Here, unlike anywhere else in the world, we have to build boards that generate speed. Everywhere else, they’re building boards to control the power and speed. We’re riding crap.” of where you are skillwise, and you grow into it,” he explains. For that reason, Whisnant, who used to sell through shops, is glad he doesn’t now. “When I was growing up, the guys in the surf shops knew what was going on. Nowadays, it’s probably a kid who doesn’t know anything about the boards. It’s sad,” says Whisnant. “That Rusty, Channel Island or Lost, those are specifically built for good waves, and are not going to work well in our surf. They’re popular here because most of the people who buy them are not the best surfers, and they want something that makes them look good on the beach. If you have one of those boards, the locals automatically tag you.” Get started on a used board and, if you’re serious about surfing, Whisnant says, your first option should be a locally shaped board. “Second option, a board made in Florida; third option, a board made on the East Coast. Surfing is totally upside-down, because it is all about image. If people knew more about it, locals would be buying a lot more locally shaped boards.”

“Innovation is happening daily. Everybody’s done everything in shaping, now we’re trying to tweak it,” he says. “And it’s so subjective. One guy will love a board, and his buddy hates it.” A committed local surfer should have at least two boards, Dunlop says: a highperformance thruster for good days, and a wider, fishy board for bad days. He’s sworn off riding a longboard again until he gets his first Social Security check. “Here, unlike anywhere else in the world, we have to build boards that generate speed. Everywhere else, they’re building boards to control the power and speed. We’re riding crap,” says Dunlop, who rides crap and Indonesian dream breaks equally well. In addition to his custom-order boards, he’s going after a growing niche market of Baby Boom surfers. “I’m building these big-guy fishes. They’re like 7'8", real flat, real wide, with four fins,” explains Dunlop. “You pump them like a shortboard and you’re juiced by a factor of 9, blowing past people. That’s the direction

“I’m like your psychiatrist,” says Mike Whisnant. “Tell me the truth and you’ll get the right results.”

14 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

“You can sit around all day and hate the China board,” says Drew Baggett, “but I want [to make] that surfer’s next board. He’s not going to get another China board.”

“I didn’t think the surf shops around here were supporting local shapers the way they deserve to be,” says Tony Iannarone. “If one of these shops had embraced me, my life would be better.”

I’m going for, older guys who think they have to have that longboard. Sunrise Surf Shop, near his factory, sends custom orders to him and carries his Mystic boards. “How many surf shops have their own shaper a block away?” he marvels. “It’s worked out well for both of us. We’ve got a tacit agreement, I sell out of my factory, but no more than $20 difference from what you pay for my board at Sunrise.” Even so, he feels that local surf shops have let down local shapers. “The giant labels have turned the whole shop/builder relationship on its head. In the past, there were no such things as terms and all that,” says Dunlop. “Kids are like, ‘Why should I buy a Mystic when I can get an Al Merrick for the same price?’ Well, the Mystic is better.” Dunlop is hopeful that locals will begin embracing locally made boards, but he’s not confident. “This is a cottage industry, built on good relationships,” he says. “They’re not my customers, they’re my friends. But if the big brands and this huge influx of boards from the Pacific Rim is all there is to choose from, surfers are going to rue the day that they let local shapers die out.”

Drew Baggett Inspired Surfboards, St. Augustine 50 boards a year, plus lots of high-tech finish work At Blue Sky Surf Shop and inspiredsurfboards.com Interesting fact: Invented Liquid Lacrosse (attaching a lacrosse stick’s head to the handle of a stand-up paddleboard paddle. Patented. First game will be played this summer.)

Drew Baggett lies awake nights thinking of ways to improve his already cutting-edge boards. “I’ll be up at 4 a.m. on NASA’s website and don’t even know what I’m reading. It’s all about new materials,” says the 33-year-old Flagler College grad and father of one. NASA doesn’t use polyurethane resins (the shaper’s standard resin) and Baggett doesn’t either. He’s 100 percent epoxy. Plus, there’s the different polystyrene foam, the lack of a stringer, the carbon-fiber rails, the composite laminated decks of bamboo and cork, and the Twang. Making a regular board involves about

five steps. Baggett, who got into shaping after he won a locally shaped board in a St. Simon’s Island surf contest, takes 25 steps. His carbon-fiber rails move the stiffness to the side of the board. “Without the stringer, which is like an I-beam, your feet can flex the board out underneath you, and then it will jump back,” explains Baggett. “When you load it, you get an energy return on what you put in. Instead of pumping, it’s a slingshot thing — they call it a twang. Real different type of ride.” Different suits Baggett, who prefers to access his secret surf spot in his fishing boat and anchor outside the breakers. He used to have boards in a dozen surf shops, turning out 500 boards a year with a crew. When he was pushed to make cheaper boards to compete with foreign-made brands, he bailed out. Now he’s down to just him, 500 square feet, and about 50 Inspired boards a year. But he’s doing a ton of his carbon/composite magic for others, like Tom Neilson in Cocoa Beach. “Neilson will nitpick me to death, and that’s good for me.” He now sells his Inspired boards only through Blue Sky in St. Augustine, because that shop doesn’t sell anything from China, “and everything they carry is 100 percent the best of the best, from Rusty to Ricky Carroll. They’re the high end, and that’s where I want to be seen,” says Baggett, who recently had one of his cork-decked, composite Inspired beauties on display at a European composites expo. “My main goal is to get a couple of bigger labels using my stuff,” says Baggett. “I want to get a California label here and do their boards.” The last four years have seen huge jumps in technique, like the vacuum bag that allows Baggett to laminate using different pressures according to his deck material. The new processes and materials, like the flex-friendly, stronger-longer epoxy, Baggett says, make his boards last three times longer than a regular board. “I’m still using cloth and resin, but with a new system to use less materials, and also with a better chemical property. I remove so many layers of fiberglass cloth and reduce the weight. It’s a race for the lightest board, because in Florida, we need light boards for the weak surf.” An Inspired is unbelievably light. If he were to warranty one, he’d give it five years,

though he’s thinking more about installing a self-destruct button so his customers will come back sooner. Baggett says he touches every surfboard in every surf shop around and always keeps up with what’s new. “Trends can save local shapers, because you can make your version of that trend. You can sit around all day and hate the China board, but I want [to make] that surfer’s next board. He’s not going to get another China board,” says Baggett, a preacher’s son whose surfboard name and angelic logo are part of his Christian faith. “Basically, you have to adapt your business to the new environment. As long as you keep your chin up and make killer stuff, I don’t see any problem in the future.”

Tony Iannarone Clean Ocean Surfboards, Jacksonville Beach 500-750 boards a year Available at his shop and cleanoceansurfboards.com Interesting fact: Doesn’t own a surfboard, preferring to borrow one from friends rather than spend time on a board for himself when customers are waiting for theirs.

A young Iannarone embraced the concept of a clean ocean when he was surfing at New Jersey beaches littered with medical waste. Today, he’s embraced a new concept: selling his own boards in his own surf shop — make that surfboard shop, the only one around with a shaping room. “I opened my own shop out of necessity,” says Iannarone, a JU grad with a vert skating background. “I didn’t think the surf shops around here were supporting local shapers the way they deserve to be. If one of these shops had embraced me, I would have been golden for them. And my life would be better, more time with my kid, more time in the water.” In the morning, Iannarone works in his factory at another location with a small crew, putting out boards that he also sells to surf shops in Cape Cod and New Jersey, serving as their custom-order local shaper. His shop opens at noon, where he shapes boards and sells T-shirts and decently priced baggies. Ironically, some people don’t think Clean

Ocean is a real surf shop because it doesn’t carry enough clothing. Worse, some people think his prices should be lower than those of China-made boards. “Why would you think a hand-crafted, custom-made piece of machinery is going to be less than something that came out of a mold in China?” asks Iannarone. “They think a local guy should be the cheapest one on the block.” Influenced by a family of classic car enthusiasts and the history of surfing, Iannarone prefers to make retro-looking boards that incorporate the newest design elements for top performance. But he can shape anything for anyone who walks through the door. “It’s not about making a pro surfer better, it’s about making the guy off the street surf better.” Of course, the guy off the street oft en walks right by Clean Ocean, and Iannarone knows why. “One of my degrees is in marketing and I am shocked at how well it works [for big companies]. I am blown away by how everything is branded so efficiently nowadays, including big-name surfboards.” Iannarone honed his skills in California and knows many shapers out there are giving up the craft before they’ve had a chance to pass on their knowledge. Two shapers from Clean Ocean, who now work in Australia and Hawaii, put to use information gleaned from Iannarone — and sometimes bought from him, because at a certain point, he charges to answer his apprentices’ questions. Still, this 42-year-old devotee of economic theory (Milton Friedman is his guy) sees a scenario in which local shapers can survive — maybe even rule again. “If I was running Quicksilver or Billabong, I would be buying up as many small surf shops as I could, selling my own brand and cutting out the middleman,” he says. “They have to compete against Old Navy, Hollister and Target, and those are big players. What’s going to happen to the local surf shops when they have to compete against the people they are buying their brands from? Local shapers like me will already have our own brands: We’ll just have to build more boards.” Richard Wall themail@folioweekly.com June 7-13, 2011 | folio weekly | 15

16 | FOLIO WEEKLY | JUNE 7-13, 2011

Reasons to leave the house this week PROG GIG PRIMUS

Over the past two decades, the tripped-out trio Primus has become known for jumping genres (and sometimes changing lineups) at a freakish speed, while staying on course under the warped watchful eye of innovative bassist Les Claypool (pictured). Most recently, these Bay Area badasses began readying their rabidly loyal fans for the upcoming release “Green Naugahyde.” They perform along with The Dead Kenny Gs at 8 p.m. on Wednesday, June 8 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Jacksonville. Tickets are $38.50 and $41. 355-2787.

CHOW 4 CHARITY FOOD FIGHT T

FIDDLIN’ ABOUT RACHEL BARTON PINE

The 21st annual Jacksonville Foodfight is held at 6:30 p.m. on Thursday, June 9 at EverBank Field’s Touchdown Club, 1 EverBank Field Drive, downtown. The competition includes more than 50 area restaurants showing off their wares. A motorcycle raffle, prizes and live music by Split Tone are also featured. Proceeds benefit Second Harvest North Florida. Advance tickets are $60; $70 at the door.r. 739-7074. jacksonvillefoodfight.org org

Violinist Rachel Barton Pine performs The Many Moods of Rachel: Beer & G Strings at 7 p.m. on Sunday, June 12 at the Palace Saloon, 117 Centre St., Fernandina Beach. As this onetime child prodigy noted in an interview in Folio Weekly (“Iron Maiden,” Oct. 5, 2010), her classical skills are balanced with an abiding love of all songs metal. Her appearance with violinist Philip Pan, cellist Christopher Rex and pianist Elizabeth Pridgen is no exception: The quartet performs an eclectic program featuring works by LouisToussaint Milandre and Astor Piazzola, as well as (ahem) pieces by Black Sabbath, Van Halen and AC/DC. Tickets are $45. 261-1779.

SLIPPED DISC FRISBEE DOG CHAMPIONSHIPS

Fido got game! The Jacksonville Humane Society hosts the 16th annual Florida State Frisbee Dog Championships from 3-9 p.m. on June 11 at Mandarin High School, 4831 Greenland Road, Jacksonville. It’s one of the largest canine Frisbee disc competitions in the world, featuring contests, family-geared activities and food and drink. All leashed dogs are welcome to attend. Leashed children are optional. 725-8766.

MOTOR BOATIN’! RIVER RALLY

The 10th annual River Rally Poker Run is held Thursday, June 9 through Sunday, June 11, inviting boaters to navigate a 150-mile course on the St. Johns River, with the first boats launching at 10 a.m. on Saturday, June 10 from the docks at Metropolitan Park, 1410 Gator Bowl Blvd., Jacksonville. This three-day dreamboat of a rally offers food and drink, live entertainment and card-playing, with proceeds benefiting Camp Amigo, a summer camp for kids who are burn survivors. Registration fee per boat is $450. 607-8554. jaxriverrallypokerrun.com

HELADO NEGRO

The atmospheric, looped-out Latin-tinged bliss of Helado Negro (Spanish for “black ice cream”) comes across like a hazy, hybrid between a barrio-born Beck and homegrown electronica that cultivated its earthy roots in Brian Eno and Krautrock. The brainchild of Brooklyn-based sound sculptor Roberto Carlos Lange (pictured), Helado Negro’s latest release, “Canta Lechuza” (“Owl Singing”), is an impressive combination of cerebral sampling and catchy choruses, created during a month-long retreat in a rural cabin. He performs along with Swedish indie buzz band Junip (see our story on page 22) and locals Katie Grace Helow and Antique Animals at 7 p.m. on Monday, June 13 at 5 Points Theatre, 1028 Park St., Jacksonville. Advance tickets are $20; $50 VIP for the Underbelly afterparty. 354-7002, 359-0047. junipjax.eventbrite.com June 7-13, 2011 | folio weekly | 17

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Distress Signal: Bradley Cooper, Zach Galifinakis and Ed Helms are hoping that puke doesn’t change the value of their traveler’s checks in the gross-out comedy “The Hangover Part II.”

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Beautiful antebellum Inn with spacious guest rooms boasting the modern amenities guests love while safekeeping the old world charm. Romantic working fireplaces, antiques from around the world, private baths, whirlpool tubs, spa robes and fresh flowers are a few of the luxuries you may expect. Enjoy our beautifully landscaped gardens, fountains and our sweeping verandahs. Feast on a delicious gourmet breakfast each morning and sip wine ‘neath 500-year-old oak trees. All your worries will drift away.

103 S. 9th Street • (904) 277-2328 www.williamshouse.com

HOYT HOUSE

Hoyt House Bed & Breakfast Inn, built in 1905, is an intimate, elegant and luxurious boutique hotel that will exceed your expectations with five-star amenities, top-shelf breakfast and exceptional customer service. We offer: • 10 En-Suite Guest Chambers • Located in the Historic District • 3-Course Gourmet Breakfast • English Tea Wed.-Sun. 12:30-3p.m. • Heated Pool & Spa • Amelia Lounge & Bar • Complimentary Bicycles • Complimentary Cocktail Hour • Secure off-street Parking • Weddings & Meetings Welcome

804 Atlantic Avenue • (904) 277-4300 www.hoythouse.com

Amelia Island is 13 miles of unspoiled beaches, quaint shops, antique treasures and superb dining in a 50-block historic district less than one hour north of Jacksonville.

18 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

n the opening moments of “The Hangover Part II,” Phil (Bradley Cooper) announces “It happened again!” Little do we realize how all-encompassing that statement is. Sure, Phil is referring to Alan (Zach Galifianakis), Stu (Ed Helms) getting into intoxicated trouble with him the way they did in the breakout megahit, 2009’s “The Hangover.” But Phil is unwittingly describing the movie itself, too: With the

sporting a new facial tattoo. There’s a monkey in a Rolling Stones jean jacket, whom we later learn is a chain smoker and drug mule. And most alarmingly, international gangsta Mr. Chow (Ken Jeong) is passed out on the floor. The guys retrace their steps to learn what happened the night before, and this, of course, is part of the fun. But surprisingly, it’s not all fun. In fact, there are some pretty serious things that happen (especially to Stu) that weigh down the ridiculousness of the comedy. It’s always funny, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t occasionally too heavy for its own good. All of the actors get solid laughs, but Galifianakis is truly a sight to behold. His character Alan is a socially awkward misfit with no concept of decorum. Because he’s such

The film goes to such lengths for laughs that you literally have to see it to believe it. If nothing else, you leave admiring it for trying. an outward innocent, we like him, but the exception of being set in Thailand rather truth is, there’s nothing innocent at all about than Las Vegas, director and co-writer Todd Phillips’ sequel features almost the exact same his arrested development. He’s a complex guy played with such a simple exterior by storyline as the original. Galifianakis that we’re happy to laugh with The good news? The recycled story again (and at) Alan as needed, all too easily ignoring leads to consistent laughs. The bad news? The some apparent deep psychological issues. novelty’s worn off; it’s just not as much fun as Galifianakis has yet to be as amusing in other its predecessor. roles, but cast as the dementedly naïve Alan, he I know … if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it, right? is absolutely perfect. Hard to argue with that, but as a sequel, it has The film’s tagline of “What happens in to be more outrageous and crazier than the Vegas may stay in Vegas, but what happens in already outré original, and in making it so, Bangkok can’t even be imagined” is accurate. Phillips takes the story down some pretty dark Trust me: “The Hangover Part II” goes to paths. This time around, it’s straight-arrow such lengths for laughs, you have to see it to dentist Stu’s turn to get married, and he and believe it. If nothing else, you leave admiring it fiancée Lauren (Jamie Chung) are tying the for trying. And if the film’s opening weekend knot in Thailand. He doesn’t want a bachelor success is any indication, crowds are delighted party, but agrees when Phil, Alan, Doug (Justin • 10 En-Suite Guest Chambers • Located in the Historic District • 3-Course Gourmet at the return of these drunken clowns and Bartha) and Lauren’s brother Teddy (Mason Breakfast English Heated“Th Pool & Spa • Amelia Lounge their•antics. e Hangover Part II” is now& Bar Lee) convince him to• hang outTea byWed.-Sun. a bonfire 12:30-3p.m. • Complimentary • Complimentary Cocktail Hour • live-action Secure off-street Parking the biggest-grossing comedy of all two nights before the wedding. Bicycles “All right, one time, proving that for better or for worse, big drink,” Stu says. Famous last words. • Weddings & Meetings Welcome and gross humor is never wasted on discerning The next morning, Stu, Phil and Alan wake Atlantic • (904) 277-4300 American audiences. in a dingy Bangkok apartment,804 unsure of whereAvenue they are. Phil is covered in sweat. Alan’s head Dan Hudak is shaved. Stu is in the bathtub, sans pants, themail@folioweekly.com

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Director Matt Vaughn’s “X-Men” is an excellent mutation of this much-loved superhero saga X-Men: First Class ****

est. Comic book movie. Evah!” My inner fangirl is screaming and doing a little happy Snoopy dance: “ ‘X-Men: First Class’ is totally awesome!” The cooler, more rational part of my brain is looking at that inner fangirl with something like affectionate pity: “Silly girl, of course it’s not the best anything ever. It’s just a very well-done example of a genre that usually gets by on the generosity of its audience.” My inner fangirl is too happy to care. Huffy questions like “Is it better than ‘SpiderMan’? Huh? Is it better than ‘Iron Man’? Well, is it?” do not deter me. Those movies aren’t perfect, either. But I love how they embrace their inherent cheesiness as a complement to, not a distraction from, their proud profundity. And I love “X-Men: First Class” for the same reason: It’s so gloriously itself, and it treats its characters with such wonderful admiration, even the most complicated and hard-to-like among them, that I instinctively sympathize with them. Who wouldn’t want to be© a mutant, 2011despite the abuse they suffer at the hands of “normal” society? Has it really been nine years since the bitingly trenchant “X2: X-Men United” smacked us with its metaphors for a terrorized, terrified nation facing a seemingly unknowable enemy? “First Class” feels like the other bookend on the post-9/11 decade — even though it rewinds the “X-Men” franchise to the 1960s, it couldn’t be any more relevant today. A mutant baddie, Sebastian Shaw (Kevin Bacon, having a blast being his most villainous), is trying to manufacture a nuclear war between the United States and the Soviet Union, to wipe out the “normal” humans and create more “post-humans” like him and his friends. The year? 1962. Yup, this is the “real” story of the Cuban Missile Crisis, which alone makes this a deliciously odd tale tinged with satire. “First 2011

FolioWeekly

Class” lands in a realm just to the right of reality, somewhere between “Dr. Strangelove” and an Oliver Stone conspiracy fantasy. And boy, is it swank! Director Matthew Vaughn has made an “X-Men” movie that’s less like his superhero send-up “Kick-Ass” and more like his elegant crime drama “Layer Cake.” With its sleekness, this could almost be a lost early James Bond flick that’s been rediscovered: Shaw is a particularly Bond-like villain, with his destroy-the-world ambitions and a bevy of beautiful lady sidekicks. The heart of the movie is the push-andpull between Charles Xavier (James McAvoy, excellent as always), who can read minds and control the thoughts of others, and Erik Lehnsherr (the riveting Michael Fassbender), who can make metal do his bidding. We saw, in the first “X-Men,” the endpoint of their relationship, at which they’re bitter enemies divided over how best to interact with normal humans. While Erik sees violent conflict as the only option, Charles wants to work together. We witness their first meeting and the beginning of what is almost instantly a powerful friendship and working partnership, even though they’re in contention as well. Where is the boundary between freedom and slavery? Does torture work, and should we ever utilize it, even if it does? These questions are explored in a filter of comic-book-scaled subtlety: One scene, in which the two men need to procure information, is shocking from several angles. The brilliant thing about that scene is that both Erik and Charles are at least partly correct in each of their perspectives. And while we know where they eventually end up, the film somehow manages to avoid the feeling of inevitability that comes with prequels and preordained endings. It’s not all serious business. For all its heaviness, this film is sweet, funny and pleasingly fast-paced. It’s not Shakespeare … but, as breezy, thoughtful summer comic-book movies go, “X-Men: First Class” is a welcome new breed. Mary Ann Johanson themail@folioweekly.com

DNA DKNY: The cast of the action thriller “X-Men: First Class” sports the hippest fashion trends and genetic aberrations.

20 | FOLIO WEEKLY | JUNE 7-13, 2011

“OK, gang. Let’s start this inaugural meeting of the ‘Space Rangers UFO Hunters Club.’ First order of business: no dressing up like Charles Kuralt. All those in favor?” The kids practice a little gang mentality in the Stephen Spielberg and J.J. Abrams alien action flick “Super 8,” opening locally on June 10.

this rom-com about a young corporate lawyer whose upperclass family questions her choice of a blue-collar fiancé.

FILM RATINGS **** ***@ **@@ *@@@

BON SCOTT MONTGOMERY SCOTT GREAT SCOTT GOV. SCOTT

KUNG FU PANDA 2 **@@

NOW SHOWING THE BIG UNEASY **G@

Not Rated • June 7, 8 and 9, Epic Theatre St. Augustine Nearly five years after the Hurricane Katrina disaster, longtime New Orleans resident Harry Shearer poses serious questions about his state’s well being and the government’s overall preparedness in his insightful and heartfelt documentary. BRIDESMAIDS

Rated PG • AMC Orange Park, AMC Regency Square, Carmike Amelia Island, Carmike Fleming Island, Cinemark Tinseltown, Epic Theatre St. Augustine, Hollywood River City, Regal Avenues, Regal Beach Blvd. The sequel to the popular animated martial arts film again features our hero Po (voiced by Jack Black) teaming up with fellow kung fu masters the Furious Five to vanquish a powerful villain. MADEA’S BIG HAPPY FAMILY **@@

Rated PG-13 • AMC Orange Park, AMC Regency Square Loretta Devine, Shad “Bow Wow” Moss and Cassi Davis star in this latest ensemble-driven family comedy/drama from Tyler Perry. PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN: ON STRANGER TIDES

*G@@

Rated R • AMC Orange Park, AMC Regency Square, Carmike Amelia Island, Carmike Fleming Island, Cinemark Tinseltown, Epic Theatre St. Augustine, Hollywood River City, Regal Avenues, Regal Beach Blvd. Discerning moviegoers will be unwilling to divorce themselves from their hard-earned cash to see this vapid, unholy marriage of bad jokes and a weak cast starring Kristen Wiig and Maya Rudolph. FAST FIVE *G@@

**G@

Rated PG-13 • AMC Orange Park, AMC Regency Square, Carmike Amelia Island, Carmike Fleming Island, Cinemark Tinseltown, Epic Theatre St. Augustine, Hollywood River City, Regal Avenues, Regal Beach Blvd., WGHoF IMAX Theatre Johnny Depp’s return performance as Captain Jack Sparrow in the latest installment of this popular swashbuckling series keeps an otherwise predictable film afloat. Also starring Penelope Cruz, Ian McShane and Geoffrey Rush and Keith “I don’t really need the money” Richards.

Rated PG-13 • AMC Orange Park, AMC Regency Square, Carmike Fleming Island, Cinemark Tinseltown, Epic Theatre St. Augustine, Hollywood River City, Regal Avenues Vin Diesel, Paul Walker and Dwayne Johnson star in the latest installment of the popular car-driven series that spins out into predictable action-flick fare.

PRIEST

THE HANGOVER PART II

**@@

**G@

Rated PG-13 • AMC Orange Park, AMC Regency Square Stars Paul Bettany and Maggie Q keep an otherwise routine vampire-action flick from chewing on the scenery. READY Not Rated • AMC Regency Square This Bollywood musical comedy from director Anees Bazmee tells the story of a family’s attempt to take advantage of a case of mistaken identity. RIO **@@

JANE EYRE Rated PG-13 • 5 Points Theatre Director Cary Fukunaga’s staid take on Charlotte Brönte’s gothic love story stars Mia Waskikowska and Michael Fassbender.

Rated G • AMC Orange Park, AMC Regency Square, Regal Avenues, Regal Beach Blvd. This birdbrained animated flick coasts along on the star power of its cast (featuring the voices of Jesse Eisenberg and Anne Hathaway), but its unoriginal story keeps it caged in clichéd family fare.

JUMPING THE BROOM

SOMETHING BORROWED

**@@

*@@@

**@@

Rated PG-13 • AMC Orange Park, AMC Regency Square, Cinemark Tinseltown, Hollywood River City Paula Patton, Laz Alonso (“Avatar”) and Angela Bassett star in

Rated PG-13 • AMC Orange Park, Carmike Fleming Island, Cinemark Tinseltown Discerning moviegoers won’t feel like losing 90 minutes

AREA THEATERS AMELIA ISLAND Carmike Amelia Island 7, 1132 S. 14th St., 261-9867 ARLINGTON & REGENCY AMC Regency 24, 9451 Regency Square Blvd., 264-3888 BAYMEADOWS & MANDARIN Regal Avenues 20, 9525 Philips Highway, 538-3889 BEACHES Regal Beach Blvd. 18, 14051 Beach Blvd., 992-4398 FIVE POINTS 5 Points Theatre, 1028 Park St., 359-0047 NORTHSIDE Hollywood River City 14, River City Marketplace, 12884 City Center Blvd., 757-9880

ORANGE PARK AMC Orange Park 24, 1910 Wells Road, (888) AMC-4FUN Carmike Fleming Island 12, 1820 Town Center Blvd., 621-0221 SAN MARCO San Marco Theatre, 1996 San Marco Blvd., 396-4845 SOUTHSIDE Cinemark Tinseltown, 4535 Southside Blvd., 998-2122 ST. AUGUSTINE Epic Theatres, 112 Theatre Drive, 797-5757 IMAX Theater, World Golf Village, 940-IMAX Pot Belly’s, 36 Granada St., 829-3101

JUNE 7-13, 2011 | FOLIO WEEKLY | 21

of their lived to this silly, banal rom-com starring Ginnifer Goodwin, Kate Hudson and John Krazinski (“The Office”). SOUL SURFER **@@

Rated PG • Regal Avenues True-life story of surfer girl Bethany Hamilton (AnnaSophia Robb) and her fight for survival after a vicious shark attack off the coast of the Hawaiian island of Kauai. SUPER 8 ****

Rated PG-13 • Opens June 10 at area theaters Director J.J. Abrams’ and producer Stephen Spielberg’s surefire summer hit tells the story of a group of kids who experience a “close encounter” with a UFO in late-’70s Ohio. THOR

LAUREL & HARDY FILMS The 1927 silent short, “With Love and Hisses,” followed by the feature film “Great Guns” (1941) are screened at 7 p.m. on June 13 at Pablo Creek branch library, 13295 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. Admission is free. 314-5801. POT BELLY’S CINEMA “Of Gods and Men,” “Limitless” and “The Lincoln Lawyer” are shown at Pot Belly’s, 36 Granada St., St. Augustine. 829-3101.

***@

5 POINTS THEATRE “Jane Eyre” screens at 5:15 and 7:30 p.m. on June 7, 8 and 9, at 4:45 p.m. on June 10 and 11, at 3 p.m. on June 12 and at 5:15 p.m. June 14-16 at 5 Points Theatre, 1028 Park St., Jacksonville. Call for additional showtimes. “Meek’s Cutoff” screens at 7 and 9 p.m. on June 10 and 11, at 5 p.m. on June 12 and at 7:30 p.m. June 14-16. “Monty Python & the Holy Grail” screens at 11 p.m. on June 10 and at 7 p.m. on June 12. “Shrek” runs at 10 a.m. on June 14. 359-0047.

WATER FOR ELEPHANTS

WGHOF IMAX THEATER ”Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides 3D” is screened along with “Born To Be Wild 3D,” “The Ultimate Wave Tahiti 3D” (featuring Kelly Slater), “Hubble 3D” and “Under The Sea 3D,” at World Golf Hall of Fame Village, 1 World Golf Place, Exit 323 off I-95, St. Augustine. 940-IMAX. worldgolfimax.com

Rated PG-13 • AMC Orange Park, AMC Regency Square, Carmike Amelia Island, Carmike Fleming Island, Cinemark Tinseltown, Epic Theatre St. Augustine, Hollywood River City, Regal Avenues, Regal Beach Blvd. Kenneth Branagh’s winning adaptation of Norse mythology by way of Marvel Comics is a thunderous affair, featuring Chris Hemsworth, Natalie Portman, Anthony Hopkins and Tom Hiddleston. **@@

Rated PG-13 • Epic Theatre St. Augustine, Regal Beach Blvd. This adaptation of Sara Gruen’s novel stars Robert Pattinson and Reese Witherspoon as a couple who find romance and danger in a traveling circus. WINTER IN WARTIME **@@

Rated R • Regal Beach Blvd. This Dutch import tells the story of a young boy who tries to help the resistance during WWII by hiding an English pilot from the German soldiers. WIN WIN **G@

Rated R • Epic Theatre St. Augustine Paul Giamatti stars in director Thomas McCarthy’s droll comedy about a high school wrestling coach dealing with his star athlete’s highly dysfunctional yet lovable family. X-MEN: FIRST CLASS ****

OTHER FILMS ANASTASIA MOVIE CLUB The German film “Wings of Desire” (PG-13) is shown at 5:30 p.m. on June 7 at Anastasia Branch Library, 6670 U.S. 1 S., St. Augustine. In German with English subtitles. 209-3730. AMELIA ISLAND JUNE FILM SERIES Amelia Island Film Society and Fernandina Little Theater present the June Film Series featuring “Malena” at 6:30 and

22 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

9 p.m. on June 10 at Fernandina Little Theater, 1014 Beech St., Fernandina Beach. “Cinema Paradiso” screens at 6:30 and 9 p.m. on June 11, and “Bread and Tulips” at 5 and 7:30 p.m. on June 12. The Retrospective on Audrey Hepburn starts on June 15. Tickets are $10; $8 for Film Society members. 624-1145. aifilmsociety.org

NEW ON DVD & BLU-RAY DRIVE ANGRY Pure cinematic junk-food action flick starring (who else?) Nicolas Cage as a dude who breaks out of Hell to save his granddaughter from being sacrificed by a wacky cult. What “Drive Angry” lacks in originality it makes up in fast cars and sheer silliness. BIUTIFUL Director Alejandro González Iñárritu’s Academy Awardnominated film stars Javier Bardem in a heralded performance as Uxbal, single father who must navigate the rocky terrain of parenting, terminal illness and the criminal underworld of Barcelona. You know, the usual suburban soccer dad stuff. PASSION PLAY Mickey Rourke, Bill Murray and Megan Fox star in director Mitch Glazer’s hit-and-miss crime noir thriller about a downon-his-luck jazz musician who’s trying to save the life of an angel. ANOTHER YEAR Mike Leigh’s film stars Jim Broadbent and Ruth Sheen as a British baby-boomer couple who deal with family, friends and growing older in this critically acclaimed dramedy. AC/DC: LET THERE BE ROCK This 30th anniversary edition of the onetime Midnight Movie classic features the hard-rocking Aussies in a 1979 concert filmed in Paris, featuring original frontman Bon Scott.

Lovely but deadly: The villainous Lord Shen (voiced by Gary Oldman) hatches a bird-brained plan to take over China in the animated martial-arts flick “Kung Fu Panda 2.”

Sitting on Top of the World: Tobias Winterkorn, José González and Elias Araya are Junip.

JUNIP with HELADO NEGRO, ANTIQUE ANIMALS and KATIE GRACE HELOW Monday, June 13 at 7 p.m. 5 Points Theatre, 1028 Park St., Jacksonville Tickets are $20 for concert only, $50 for concert and VIP after party 359-0047

nfamiliar with Swedish trio Junip? That’s understandable. But you’ve probably heard of the band’s Swedish-Argentinean frontman José González, whose 2003 debut album “Veneers” has sold more than a million copies worldwide. His calling card from that record — a tender acoustic cover of The Knife’s “Heartbeats” — was featured in a celebrated Sony Bravia commercial and on TV shows “One Tree Hill,” “Bones,” and “Scrubs” — and ultimately hit No. 15 on Pitchfork.com’s definitive Best Songs of the 2000s list. Yet it was precisely that solo success that forced González, Elias Araya and Tobias Winterkorn to wait 10 long years to release Junip’s debut album, 2010’s “Fields.” Maintaining González’s love of hushed balladry and classic fingerpicking while inching closer to Krautrock and electric folk territory, “Fields” was worth the decade-long delay. The underrated Swedish trio visits Florida next week for the first time, and González will spin a two-hour private DJ set after the band’s June 13 performance at 5 Points Theatre. Folio Weekly chatted with González about the band’s hardcore roots, its global profile and good oldfashioned Scandinavian socialism.

Folio Weekly: Junip started in the late ’90s, but the band is just now touring on its debut album. What took so long? José González: We had talked about doing something for a very long time, but we didn’t because, for a long period, we were living in different countries. Elias was studying art

[in Finland and Norway], I was at university [studying biochemistry] and Tobias was teaching. So the first five years, we were just inactive. Then I finally released my solo stuff, so after a while we decided to give Junip a proper go, taking time off from everything else so we could put together the album and now tour a year with the music. F.W.: Junip is a truly global band — from Sweden, with Argentinean roots in your family and Ethiopian ones in Elias’, and combining

“I’m looking forward to the festivals, but not to the early morning check-ins at the airport. That’s actually the worst part of touring.” African rhythms with British folk and American rock. Is this international identity important to you? J.G.: Yeah, but we don’t think about it that much. We were all born and raised in Sweden, so although I have my LatinAmerican influences. And we’re inspired by African music; if you listen to Junip, I don’t think there’s that much there. It’s more like ’60s and ’70s soul and psychedelia, along with Krautrock like Can. The more exotic influences don’t really show that much. F.W.: You started off playing punk and hardcore as teenagers. Can you pinpoint the shift to today’s gentler, acoustic-based music? J.G.: I was always writing acoustic songs at the same time I was playing bass in the

hardcore bands, so there was never a switch from one to the other. It was more about a gradual letting go. F.W.: Junip’s tour itinerary is pretty impressive — Bonnaroo in Tennessee, a Florida run, a month of European festivals, then back to the States for San Francisco’s Outside Lands Festival. Do you enjoy traveling this much? J.G.: I wouldn’t say that we like it; we like being in new cities meeting new people, but the travel part isn’t that fun. [Laughs.] I’m looking forward to those festivals, but not to the early morning check-ins at the airport. That’s actually the worst part of touring. F.W.: You’re playing four dates in Florida, compared with one each in Brooklyn and Washington, D.C. Why the Sunshine State love? J.G.: I did a couple of solo shows in Florida three or four years ago, but on all my U.S. tours, I’ve only been that one time. I’m very excited, although I think it’s going to be hot. Hopefully we’ll get some beach time. F.W.: In Sweden, music is subsidized directly by the government, which most people here in the United States would call straight-up socialism. How important was that to your musical formation? J.G.: We usually mention that as a reason why so many bands from Sweden make it abroad. When I was a teenager, it was really easy to find a rehearsal space where you could just go in and play without owning any instruments or amps. Most people I know started that way, where in the States, you’re either starting out in a garage or because you’ve got rich parents. Nick McGregor themail@folioweekly.com June 7-13, 2011 | folio weekly | 23

Frequency Wave: Dick Dale hangs ten and shreds the competition on his trusty Fender Stratocaster.

Swell Season

Legendary surf guitarist Dick Dale celebrates a half-century of riding the wave of popular music DICK DALE with LARAMIE DEAN Wednesday, June 15 at 8 p.m. Café Eleven, 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Tickets are $25, 460-9311

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hen Jimi Hendrix recorded “Third Stone from the Sun” in 1966, he included the infamous spoken-word line, “Then you’ll never hear surf music again.” Many perceived 260-9770. rUn dAte: 060711 it as a dig against the receding beach-blanket subgenre that had all but dominated American in theRep early fm ’60s. But in reality, Hendrix Produced by mm Checked by rock Sales was reacting to a rumor that Dick Dale had missed the first gig in his life due to a nasty bout with rectal cancer. Longtime fan Hendrix reasoned that if the widely acclaimed King of the Surf Guitar had pulled a no-show, he must be on his deathbed. Born Richard Anthony Monsour in 1937 to a Lebanese father and a Polish mother, Dale moved from Massachusetts to Southern California in 1954 and took up surfing in the sport’s early heyday. But his earliest musical influence came

Thursday, June 16, Film “All Rendered Truth” 7 p.m. MOCA Theater This revealing film documents and celebrates the soulful art, environments and voices of self-taught artists in the rural American South. It reveals a refreshing perspective of race, religion and the world through the eyes of these colorful storytellers. Spanning the lives of over 20 renowned artists, “All Rendered Truth” captures the creative spirit of a disappearing culture. Grandpa’s CouGh MediCine performs at 6:30p.m.

24 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

amalgamation of surf music, jazz stylings, Arabic folk and rock ‘n’ roll experimentation eventually led Guitar Player Magazine to name Dale the “Father of Heavy Metal.” But when Dale spent the summer of 1961 packing the Rendezvous Ballroom on Southern California’s Balboa Peninsula, he had no idea he was creating a new musical genre. He was just trying to attract surf-crazed teenagers to the oldschool jazz club, while placating conservative city officials who gave him permits for the venue — but insisted that attendees wear ties. Dale’s raucous six-month run at Rendezvous gave surf music just the lift it needed, and his first album, “Surfer’s Choice,” was released the following year, earning Dale a deal with Capitol Records. Whether Hendrix’s famous quotation presaged it or not, surf music eventually dropped from the American musical consciousness. Though he recovered nicely, Dale’s cancer forced him to retired from music for several years. In the meantime, he became a vegetarian, an exotic-animal advocate, an avid architect, a

By the time Quentin Tarantino used “Miserlou” as the opening track of his 1994 cult hit “Pulp Fiction,” Dick Dale’s comeback was complete. from an oud-playing uncle who worked bellydancing gigs. That led Dale to become one of the first electric guitarists to utilize non-Western scales; in fact, his iconic 1962 hit, “Miserlou,” was actually based on an ancient Lebanese folk song. Dale was left-handed, and so as Hendrix had been, he was forced to play standard right-handed guitars upside-down. But Dick Dale didn’t even bother to flip his notoriously heavy-gauge strings, instead transposing chords and notes backwards in his head. He also put several of Leo Fender’s original Stratocaster axes through their paces in the late ’50s, and worked closely with Fender, Freddy Tavares and the Lansing Speaker Co. to develop a then-unheardof 100-watt amp which redefined hard rock. Although he was trying to mimic the sounds he’d heard while surfing, musically Dale was also chasing the big band drumming style of Gene Krupa. Once he started singing, Dale realized that his flat, dry voice wouldn’t work with his famously overdriven guitar tones. So he disassembled an old Hammond organ, removed the reverb unit, and had Fender build the first “Tank Reverb” effect pedal, which gave his music a decidedly “wet” feel. This unlikely

part-time pilot and a martial arts aficionado. In 1979, after a leg injury suffered while surfing became infected due to polluted water, Dale added environmental activist to his résumé. That rekindled his love of performing surf music, and in 1987, he was nominated for a Grammy for “Pipeline,” which he performed in the movie “Back to the Beach” with Stevie Ray Vaughan. And by the time Quentin Tarantino used “Miserlou” as the opening track of his 1994 cult hit “Pulp Fiction,” Dale’s comeback was complete. Since then, he’s made a killing licensing his songs to shows and movies, performed original music for Disneyland and NASA, and received a pile of lifetime achievement awards. Most importantly, at 74, he’s still going strong, touring with his son Jimmy on drums and outlasting guitar players a third his age. He famously claims to have never had alcohol or taken drugs, and he guitar virtuoso overcame another bout with cancer in 2008. “I don’t give a shit what cancer thinks,” he told Surfer Magazine in 2010. “I’m going to play my goddamn guitar and that’s all there is to it.” Nick McGregor themail@folioweekly.com

CONCERTS THIS WEEK

EVOLETTE, WAITING FOR BRANTLEY The local bands are on at 7 p.m. on June 7 at Brewsterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pit, 14003 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. Tickets are $10. 223-9850. NASHVILLE PUSSY, KOFFIN KATS Heavy-hitters Nashville Pussy play at 8 p.m. on June 7 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., Jacksonville. Advance tickets are $15. 398-7496. CLOUD 9 Local faves play at 6:30 p.m. on June 8 at Casa Marina Hotel & Restaurant, 691 N. First St., Jax Beach. 270-0025. PRIMUS, THE DEAD KENNY Gs Prog freaks Primus perform at 8 p.m. on June 8 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Jacksonville. Tickets are $38.50 and $41. 355-2787. VOLTAGE BROTHERS The Alive After Five series presents this funky group at 5 p.m. on June 9 at The Markets at St. Johns Town Center, 4850 Big Island Drive, Jacksonville. 998-7156. MICHAEL GARRETT Local musician Garrett performs at 6 p.m. on June 9 at Pusserâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Caribbean Grille, 816 A1A N., Ponte Vedra Beach. 280-7766. FALLEN TEMPLARS, BEWARE THE NEVER ENDING, COME WHAT MAY, DREAM OF THE DAY, WATERSHIP DOWN, NEWBORN RANSOM, SIRENA Local rockers jam on it at 6 p.m. on June 9 at Brewsterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pit, 14003 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. Tickets are $10. 223-9850. ANDREW WEATHERS, GREGORY OWENS, JACKIE KENNEDY Contemporary experimental music at 8 p.m. on June 9 at Riverside Center, 196 S.R. 312, St. Augustine. 824-5740. THE WHEY This local act plays at 8 p.m. on June 9 at The Roadhouse, 231 Blanding Blvd., Orange Park. 246-0611. REAL CITY RADIO, CAPTAIN WEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;RE SINKING, SYNCODESTROYO, STATUS FAUX, DESTIN FOR FLA These punk and indie bands play at 8 p.m. on June 9 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., Jacksonville. Advance tickets are $8. 398-7496. BAD ASSETS The locals play at 8 p.m. on June 9 at Cliffâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bar & Grill, 3033 Monument Road, Ste. 2, Jacksonville. 645-5162. MOTOGRATER, FALLEN TEMPLARS, ERODE, THRESHOLD, CARNIVOROUS CARNIVAL These heavyweights rock out at 7 p.m. on June 10 at Brewsterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pit, 14003 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. Tickets are $10. 223-9850. T&C Band These upbeat rockers perform at 7 p.m. on June 10 at Three Layers CafĂŠ, 1602 Walnut St., Jacksonville. 355-9791. GHOST RIDERS The area rockers roll on stage at 8 p.m. on June 10 and 11 at The Roadhouse, 231 Blanding Blvd., Orange Park. 246-0611.

DAN COADY Music in the Courtyard presents local music man Coady at 8 p.m. on June 10 at 200 First St., Neptune Beach. 249-2922. CIRCLE OF INFLUENCE These local rockers perform at 8 p.m. on June 10 and 11 at Cliffâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bar & Grill, 3033 Monument Road, Ste. 2, Jacksonville. 645-5162. REBECCA DAY Singer-songwriter Day is on at 8 p.m. on June 10 at The Grape, 10281 Midtown Parkway, Jacksonville. 642-7111. KURT LANHAM This singer-songwriter plays at 8 p.m. on June 10 at Pusserâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Caribbean Grille, 816 A1A N., Ponte Vedra Beach. 280-7766. BLUE DOGS These rockers play some howlingly good rock at 8 p.m. on June 10 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach. Tickets are $10. 246-2473. THE PARLOTONES, THE DAYLIGHTS, FOR THE FUTURE, THE WESTERLIES Indie rock is featured at 8 p.m. on June 10 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., Jacksonville. Advance tickets are $8. 398-7496. GET PERMISSION The local band is on at 8:30 p.m. on June 10 at Culhaneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Irish Pub, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach. 249-9595. BASTOGNE The rockers perform at 9 p.m. on June 10 at Dive Bar, 331 E. Bay St., Jacksonville. 359-9090. RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET Davin McCoy and Terry Whitehead are in on June 11 at Riverside Arts Market, held under the Fuller Warren Bridge at Riverside Avenue, Jacksonville. 554-6865. ALAN TRIO BAND This band plays at 6:30 p.m. on June 11 at Culhaneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach. 249-9595. VAINS OF JENNA, NORTHE, SEEKING SERENITY, SIR REAL These area bands play at 7 p.m. on June 11 at Brewsterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pit, 14003 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. Tickets are $10. 223-9850. JANE JANE POLLOCK, BO & THE LOCOMOTIVE Experimental poppers Jane Jane Pollock play at 8 p.m. on June 11 at Underbelly, 1021 Park St., Jacksonville. 354-7002. BUCK SMITH PROJECT This area band plays at 8 p.m. on June 11 at Pusserâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Caribbean Grille, 816 A1A N., Ponte Vedra Beach. 280-7766. FIRST COAST FRIENDS OF FUNK CD Release Party with BRADY CLAMPITT BAND, JACKSON DAVIS The funk begins promptly at 8 p.m. on June 11 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach. Tickets are $8. 246-2473. ERIC DENTON, DAN McCLINTOCK The singer-songwriters perform at 8 p.m. on June 11 at European Street CafĂŠ, 5500 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. Tickets are $10. 399-1740. A FAYLENE SKY, SLEEP CITY, THRESHOLD, MYKA RELOCATE,

DREAM OF THE DAY These rockers play at 8 p.m. on June 11 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., Jacksonville. Advance tickets are $8. 398-7496. MOJO CHILLIN This blues band is on at 8:30 p.m. on June 11 at Downtown Blues Bar & Grille, 714 St. Johns Ave., Palatka. (386) 325-5454. PARTY OF FOUR Local rockers perform at 9 p.m. on June 11 at Park Avenue Billiards, 1580 Park Ave., Orange Park. 215-1557. LET IT GROW This group sprouts on stage at 9 p.m. on June 11 at Dive Bar, 331 E. Bay St., Jacksonville. 359-9090. GOLIATH FLORES The multi-instrumentalist plays at 1 p.m. on June 12 at Three Layers CafĂŠ, 1602 Walnut St., Jacksonville. 355-9791. AMONGST THE FORGOTTEN These Beach-based rockers perform at 6 p.m. on June 12 at Brewsterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pit, 14003 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. Tickets are $10. 223-9850. JK WAYNE Traditional Irish music at 6:30 p.m. on June 12 at Culhaneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Irish Pub, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach. 249-9595. THE SPITS, TV GHOST, ALLIGATOR Seattle punks The Spits perform at 8 p.m. on June 12 at CafĂŠ Eleven, 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine. Advance tickets are $8; $10 at the door. 460-9311. BUBBLY JOE, THE MANTRAS, TASTE BUDS Dank reggae-rock fills the air at 8 p.m. on June 12 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., Jacksonville. Advance tickets are $8. 398-7496. SCHOOL BOY HUMOR, HOLLANDER, TAYLOR BRASH The indie rock antics begin at 8 p.m. on June 13 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., Jacksonville. Advance tickets are $10. 398-7496. JUNIP, HELADO NEGRO, KATIE GRACE HELOW, ANTIQUE ANIMALS The indie rock starts at 7 p.m. on June 13 at 5 Points Theatre, 1028 Park St., Jacksonville. Tickets are $20 for concert only, $50 for concert and VIP after party. 359-0047. DANNY KENT Local singer Kent plays at 8 p.m. on June 13 at Pusserâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Caribbean Grille, 816 A1A N., Ponte Vedra Beach. 280-7766. TETRARCH, ULTRACOVEN, THE SILENT ASYLUM, CALL IT FICTION, PARTY 4 THREE, AMP STATION, SLEEP SOIL, LET IT HAPPEN Atlanta hard rockers Tetrarch perform at 7 p.m. on June 14 at Brewsterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pit, 14003 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. Tickets are $10. 223-9850. MONICA da SILVA & CHAD ALGER The bossa nova and pop duo perform at 8 p.m. on June 14 at European Street CafĂŠ, 1704 San Marco Blvd., Jacksonville. Tickets are $10. 399-1740. CONSIDER THE SOURCE, SINISTER MOUSTACHE Indie rockers

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UPCOMING CONCERTS

MATISYAHU Aug. 23, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall DELBERT McCLINTON Sept. 10, The Florida Theatre ERYKAH BADU, THE Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;JAYS, RICKY SMILEY Sept. 17, Veterans Memorial Arena REV. HORTON HEAT, SUPERSUCKERS Sept. 17, Freebird Live PETER FRAMPTON Oct. 7, St. Augustine Amphitheatre TAYLOR SWIFT Nov. 11, Veterans Memorial Arena

Reggie Lee at 5 p.m. on June 12. DJ Roc at 5 p.m. every Wed.

ARLINGTON, REGENCY

AJâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S BAR & GRILLE, 10244 Atlantic Blvd., 805-9060 DJ Sheryl every Thur., Fri. & Sat. DJ Mike every Tue. & Wed. Karaoke every Thur. MEEHANâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S TAVERN, 9119 Merrill Rd., Ste. 5, 551-7076 Karaoke every Wed. Live music every Fri. MVPâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S SPORTS GRILLE, 12777 Atlantic Blvd., 221-1090 Live music at 9 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. PLUSH, RAIN, LAVA, 845 University Blvd. N., 745-1845 DJ Massive spins top 40 in Rain every Wed., DJs spin Latin every Fri.; house & techno in Z-Bar every Fri. TONINOâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S TRATTORIA & MARTINI BAR, 7001 Merrill Rd., Ste. 45, 743-3848 Harry & Sally from 6:30-9 p.m. every Wed. Alaina Colding every Thur. W. Harvey Williams at 6 p.m. every Fri. Signature String Quartet every Sat.

DICK DALE, LARAMIE DEAN June 15, CafĂŠ Eleven ACOUSTIC ALCHEMY June 15, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall SOL DRIVEN TRAIN June 16, Mojo Kitchen KEITH URBAN June 17, Veterans Memorial Arena KYMYSTRY, ROSCO CAINE June 18, Freebird Live MILE TRAIN, ROCCO BLU June 18, Mojo Kitchen AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH OTEP, BLACK GUARD, SISTER SIN, DYSTROPHY, ONE-EYED BEECH STREET GRILL, 801 Beech St., 277-3662 John DOLL June 24, Brewsterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pit Springer every Fri. & Sat., every other Thur. Barry Randolph YELLOWCARD, RUNNER RUNNER June 25, Mavericks Rock Nâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; every Sun. Honky Tonk Concert Hall CAFE KARIBO, 27 N. Third St., 277-5269 Beech Street Blues ZACH DEPUTY June 25, Freebird Live Band at 7:30 p.m. on June 16. Live music in the courtyard at 6 APPETITE FOR DESTRUCTION (Guns N Roses tribute) July p.m. every Fri. & Sat., at 5 p.m. every Sun. 1, Freebird Live AVONDALE, ORTEGA DOG STAR TAVERN, 10 N. Second St., 277-8010 Mighty COREY SMITH July 2, Freebird Live BRICK RESTAURANT, 3585 St. Johns Ave., 387-0606 Duet Madvans on June 10. Bird Street Players on June 11 PSYCHEDELIC FURS July 3, Freebird Live GENNAROâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S ITALIANO SOUTH, 5472 First Coast Hwy., every Wed. Goliath Flores and Sam Rodriguez every Thur. Bush U2 BY UV (U2 TRIBUTE) July 9, Freebird Live 491-1999 Live jazz from 7:30-9:30 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. Doctors every 1st Fri. & Sat. Live jazz every Fri. & Sat. CHRIS THOMAS KING July 16, Mojo Kitchen GREEN TURTLE TAVERN, 14 S. Third St., 321-2324 Dan Voll THE CASBAH CAFE, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966 Goliath BOBBY LEE RODGERS July 16, Freebird Live from 7-10 p.m. every Fri. Live music every weekend Flores every Wed. 3rd Bass every Sun. Live music every Mon. WIZ KHALIFA July 17, St. Augustine Amphitheatre INDIGO ALLEY, 316 Centre St., 261-7222 Dan Voll & the Alley ECLIPSE, 4219 St. Johns Ave., 387-3582 DJ Keith spins for JASON ISBELL & THE 400 UNIT, JONNY CORNDAWG July 19, Cats at 8 p.m. every Sat. Frankieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Jazz Jam at 7:30 p.m. every Karaoke every Tue. DJ Free spins vintage every Fri. DJ Dave Berg Mojo Kitchen Tue. Open mic at 7 p.m. every Thur. Live music every Fri. & Sat. spins every Sat. DJ Alex Pagan spins every Sun. TOBY KEITH, AARON LEWIS July 21, St. Augustine Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;KANEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S IRISH PUB, 318 Centre St., 261-1000 Dan Voll at ELEVATED AVONDALE, 3551 St. Johns Ave., 387-0700 Amphitheatre 7:30 p.m. every Wed. Turner London Band at 8:30 p.m. every Karaoke with Dave Thrash every Wed. DJ 151 spins hip hop, WE THE KINGS, SUMMER SET July 22, Freebird Live Thur., Fri. & Sat. R&B, funk, soul & old-school every Thur. Live music every TRIBAL SEEDS, SEEDLESS July 23, Freebird Live THE PALACE SALOON & SHEFFIELDâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S, 117 Centre St., weekend. DJ Catharsis spins lounge beats every 1st & 4th Sat. FRONTIERS (JOURNEY TRIBUTE) July 29, Freebird Live 491-3332 BSP Unplugged every Tue. & Sun. Wes Cobb every Patrick Evan & Co-Alition every Industry Sun. ALIEN ANT FARM July 29, Brewsterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pit Wed. DJ Heavy Hess in Sheffieldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, Hupp & Rob in Palace every MOJO NO. 4, 3572 St. Johns Ave., 381-6670 Live music every FURTHUR featuring BOB WEIR & PHIL LESH July 30, St. Thur. Live music every Fri. & Sat. DJ Miguel Alvarez in Sheffieldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Fri. & Sat. Augustine Amphitheatre every Fri. DJ Heavy Hess every Sat. Cason every Mon. TOM & BETTYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S, 4409 Roosevelt Blvd., 387-3311 Live music THE BRETHREN, GRANDPAâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S COUGH MEDICINE July 30, Mojo PLAE, 80 Amelia Circle, Amelia Island Plantation, 277-2132 every Fri. Karaoke at 8 p.m. every Sat. Kitchen Gary Ross from 7-11 p.m. every Thur.-Sat. TYLER BRYANT BAND July 30, Brewsterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Pit BAYMEADOWS SPORTS BAR, 2707 Sadler Rd., 277-2300 DONAVON FRANKENREITER July 30, Freebird Live ProducedTHE byCOFFEE ab Checked by Sales Rep rl promise of benefit sUpportSEABREEZE Ask for Action GRINDER, 9834 Old Baymeadows Rd., Karaoke with Daddyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;O every Wed. DJ Roc at 9 p.m. every Fri., 10 SELENA GOMEZ & THE SCENE, ALLSTAR WEEKEND July 31, 642-7600 DJs Albert Atkins and Roy Luis spin new & vintage p.m.-2 a.m. every Sat. St. Augustine Amphitheatre original house every Thur., Fri. & Sat. SLIDERâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6990 TEN YEARS Aug. 1, Freebird Live MY PLACE BAR-N-GRILL, 9550 Baymeadows Rd., 737-5299 Cason at 2 p.m. at the tiki bar every Sat. & Sun. ALISON KRAUSS & UNION STATION, JERRY DOUGLASS Out of Hand every Mon. Rotating bands every other Tue. & Wed. THE SURF, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 261-5711 Stevie Fingers on Aug. 19, St. Augustine Amphitheatre OASIS GRILL & CHILL, 9551 Baymeadows Rd., 748-9636 June 7. Larry & the Backtracks on June 9. Andy Haney on June SLIGHTLY STOOPID, REBELUTION, SHWAYZE, CISCO ADLER DJs Stan and Mike Bend spin every Feel Good Fri. 10 & 13. Marc Dobson on June 11. Richard Stratton at noon, Aug. 21, St. Augustine Amphitheatre

â&#x20AC;˘ CLUBS â&#x20AC;˘

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For questions, please call your advertising representative at 260-9770. rUn dAte: 060711 FAX YOUR PROOF IF POSSIBLE AT 268-3655

TERA NOVA, 8206 Philips Hwy., 733-8085 DJ Jose de la Soul spins salsa & freestyle every Latin Thur. DJs spin hip hop every Fri. DJs Leland & Marc-E-Marc spin top 40 & house every Sat. DJ Leland McWilliams spins for South Beach Friday every 2nd Fri. Reggae Fanatic is held every 3rd Fri. TONY Dâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S NEW YORK PIZZA & RESTAURANT, 8358 Point Meadows Dr., 322-7051 Live music from 6-9 p.m. every Fri.

BEACHES

(In Jax Beach unless otherwise noted) THE ATLANTIC, 333 N. First St., 249-3338 The Infader spins every Wed. DJ Wes Reed spins every Thur. DJ Jade spins old wave & â&#x20AC;&#x2122;80s retro, SilverStar spins hip hop every Fri. DJ Wes Reed spins â&#x20AC;&#x2122;80s, old school, remixes & mashups, Capone spins top 40 & dance faves every Sat. BEACHSIDE SEAFOOD, 120 S. Third St., 444-8862 Kurt Lanham sings classical island music every Fri.-Sun. BILLYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S BOATHOUSE, 2321 Beach Blvd., 241-9771 Kurt Lanham at 5:30 p.m. on June 9. 4Play at 6 p.m. on June 10. Incognito at noon, Jimmy Parrish at 4:30 p.m. on June 12 BLUES ROCK CAFE, 831 N. First St., 249-0007 Lacy Brinson on June 10. Bobby Mobley from 5-8 p.m. every Wed.-Sun. The Bobaloos from 9 p.m.-1 a.m. every Thur.-Sat. THE BRASSERIE, 1312 Beach Blvd., 249-5800 Live music every Wed. & Thur. BRIX TAPHOUSE, 300 N. Second St., 241-4668 DJ Anonymous every Mon., Tue. & Thur. Live music every Wed. DJ IBay every Fri. & Sat. Charlie Walker every Sun. CARIBBEE KEY, 100 N. First St., Neptune Beach, 270-8940 Live music every Thur.-Sun. CASA MARINA, 691 First St. N., 270-0025 Cloud 9 on June 8. Derryck Lawrence Project on June 15 COPPER TOP, 1712 Beach Blvd., 249-4776 Karaoke with Billy McMahan from 7-10 p.m. every Tue. THE COURTYARD, 200 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-2922 Dan Coady at 7 p.m. on June 10. Live music every Fri. CULHANEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S IRISH PUB, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-9595 John Thomas Group at 7 p.m. on June 7. Get Permission at 8:30 p.m. on June 10. Alan Trio at 6:30 p.m., Karaoke at 10 p.m. on June 11. JK Wayne on June 12. Live music every weekend DICKâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S WINGS & GRILL, 311 Third St. N., 853-5004 Live music at 9 p.m. on June 12. Open mic every Thur. Live music every Fri. & Sat. Reggae every Sun. Karaoke every Mon. ENGINE 15 BREWING COMPANY, 1500 Beach Blvd., Ste.

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Southern Fried: Georgia-based sonic psychos Jane Jane Pollock (pictured) perform along with Bo & the Locomotive at 8 p.m. on June 11 at Underbelly, 1021 Park St., Jacksonville. 354-7002.

8 p.m. every Thur. & Fri. MOJO KITCHEN, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636 Sol Driven Train on June 16. Mile Train and Rocco Blu on June 18 MONKEYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S UNCLE TAVERN, 1850 S. Third St., 246-1070 DJ Papa Sugar spins dance music at 9 p.m. every Mon., Tue., Thur. & Fri. DJ Austin Williams spins dance & for Karaoke every Wed., Sat. & Sun. NORTH BEACH BISTRO, 725 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 6, Atlantic Beach, 372-4105 Live music every Thur.-Sat. OCEAN 60, 60 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 247-0060 Live music every weekend PACOâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S MEXICAN GRILL, 333 N. First St., 208-5097 Live music at 9 p.m. every Thur. RAGTIME TAVERN, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877 Ron Perry on June 8. Fish Out of Water on June 9. Freudian Slip on June 10 & 11. Rough Mix on June 12. Live music every Wed.-Sun. RITZ LOUNGE, 139 Third Ave. N., 246-2255 DJ Jenn Azana every Wed.-Sat. DJ Ibay every Sun. RUSH STREET/CHICAGO PIZZA & SPORTS GRILL, 320 N. First St., 270-8565 A DJ spins at 10 p.m. every Wed., Fri. & Sat. SUN DOG, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 241-8221 Cloud 9 at 9:30 p.m. on June 10. Live music every Wed.-Sun. THE WINE BAR, 320 N. First St., 372-0211 Live music every Fri. & Sat.

ADVERTISING PROOF This is a copyright protected proof ÂŠ

For questions, please call your advertising representative DOWNTOWN at 260-9770. RUN DATE: 060711 BURRO BAR, 228 E. Forsyth St., 353-4692 Summerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Here FAX YOUR PROOF IF POSSIBLE AT 268-3655 Kids and Sex Wheels on June 10. Over Stars & Gutters, Ghost 217, 249-2337 Live music every Thur. EUROPEAN STREET, 992 Beach Blvd., 249-3001 Spirit Government at 5 p.m. on June 12 FIONN MACCOOLâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S IRISH PUB, 333 First St. N., 242-9499 Live music every Tue.-Sun. FLYâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S TIE IRISH PUB, 177 E. Sailfish Dr., Atlantic Beach, 246-4293 Nate Holley every Mon. Wes Cobb every Thur. Live music every Fri. & Sat. King Eddie reggae every Sun. FREEBIRD LIVE, 200 N. First St., 246-2473 Blue Dog on June 10. First Coast Friends of Funk CD release party with Brady Clampitt Band and Jackson Vegas on June 11 ISLAND GIRL CIGAR BAR, 108 First St., Neptune Beach, 372-0943 Live music at 9:30 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. LILLIEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S COFFEE BAR, 200 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-2922 Jazz at 7:30 p.m. every Sat.

and Status Faux on June 13. DJ Tin Man spins reggae & LYNCHâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S IRISH PUB, 514 N. First St., 249-5181 Split Tone Produced PROMISE OF BENEFIT SUPPORTHorse ASK FOR ACTION dub every Tue. Devin Balara, Jack Diablo & Carrie Location every at 10:30 p.m. every Tue. Nate Holley Band every Wed. Ryan Thur. Live music every Fri. $Big Bucks DJ Crew$ every Sat. Bert Campbell every Thur. Video DJ & Karaoke every Sun. Little No Shirt & Uncle Jesse every Sun. DJ Chef Rocc spins hip hop & Green Men every Mon. soul every Buttery Ass Sun. MAYPORT TAVERN, 2775 Old Mayport Rd., Atlantic Beach, CAFE 331, 331 W. Forsyth St., 354-1999 Acoustic open 270-0801 Live music at 3 p.m. every Sun. Open mic at 5 p.m. mic 9 p.m.-2 a.m. every Tue. Live music at 9 p.m. every Wed. every Wed. DJ Jason hosts Karaoke at 9 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. & Fri. Factory Jaxâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s goth-industrial 9 p.m.-2 a.m. every Sat. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1018 N. Third St., Ste. 2, 246-1500 Underground 9 p.m.-2 a.m. every Mon. Bread & Butter on June 8. Mile Train on June 9. Chillakaya on CITY HALL PUB, 234 Randolph Blvd., 356-6750 DJ Skillz June 10. Groovy Dog on June 11. Live music every Fri. & Sat. spins Motown, hip hop & R&B every Wed. Live music every Tue. & MEZZA LUNA, 110 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-5573 Neil Thur. Smooth Jazz Lunch at 11 a.m., Latin music at 9 p.m. every Dixon at 6 p.m. every Tue. Mike Shackelford and Rick Johnson first Fri.; Olâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Skool every last Fri. A DJ spins classic R&B, hip hop at 6 p.m. every Thur. & dance every Saturdaze. Live reggae & DJs spin island music MIMIâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S SPORTS GRILLE, 1021 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic every Sun. Joel Crutchfield open mic every Mon. Beach, 270-1030 DJ Dennis Hubbell spins & hosts Karaoke at

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DE REAL TING CAFE, 128 W. Adams St., 633-9738 DJs Mix Master Prince, Pete, Stylish, Big Bodie play reggae, calypso, R&B, hip hop and top 40 every Fri. & Sat. DIVE BAR, 331 E. Bay St., 359-9090 Americana Coffeehouse with Dave Hendershott on June 7. Bastogne at 9 p.m. on June 10. Let It Grow at 9 p.m. on June 11. DJ NickFresh spins every Tue. Indie Lounge. DJ SuZi-Rok spins every Thur. DJ Trim spins top 40, dance & rock every Fri. DJ Shanghai spins top 40, dance & rock every Sat. DOS GATOS, 123 E. Forsyth, 354-0666 DJ Synsonic spins every Tue. & Fri. DJ Rockin’ Bones spins rock, rockabilly & roots every Wed. DJ Scandalous spins every Sat. DJ Randall spins Karaoke every Mon. THE JACKSONVILLE LANDING, 2 Independent Dr., 353-1188 Rick Arcusa from 6-10 p.m. on June 8. The Ride from 6-10 p.m. on June 9. Old School from 5-9 p.m., Boogie Freaks at 9:30 p.m. on June 10. MidLife Crisis from 5-9 p.m., The Company at 9:30 p.m. on June 11. Barrett Jockers Band from 4-8 p.m. on June 12. Singalong at 7:30 every first Wed. THE IVY ULTRA BAR, 113 E. Bay St., 356-9200 DJs 151 The Experience & C-Lo spin every Rush Hour Wed. DJ E.L. spins top 40, South Beach & dance classics every Pure Sat. MARK’S DOWNTOWN, 315 E. Bay St., 355-5099 DJ Massive spins top 40 & dance every Velvet Fri. DJ Shotgun spins top 40 & dance every BayStreet Sat. MAVERICKS ROCK N’HONKY TONK, The Jacksonville Landing, 356-1110 Bobby Laredo spins every Thur. & Sat. Saddle Up every Sat. THE PEARL, 1101 N. Main St., 791-4499 DJs Tom P. & Ian S. spin ’80s & indie dance every Fri. DJ Ricky spins indie rock, hip hop & electro every Sat. POPPY LOVE SMOKE, 112 E. Adams St., 354-1988 Lil John Lumpkin, Stefano DiBella & Lawrence Buckner every Wed. & Fri. ZODIAC GRILL, 120 W. Adams St., 354-8283 Eric Carter and DJ Al Pete every Fri.

FLEMING ISLAND

MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1800 Town Center Blvd., 541-1999 John Earle on June 9. Live music every Fri. & Sat. MERCURY MOON, 2015 C.R. 220, 215-8999 DJ Ty spins for ladies’ nite every Thur. Live music every Fri. & Sat. Buck Smith Project every Mon. Blistur unplugged every Wed. RUSH STREET/CHICAGO PIZZA & SPORTS GRILL, 406 Old Hard Rd., Ste. 106, 213-7779 A DJ spins at 10 p.m. every

28 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

Wed., Fri. & Sat. WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198 Live music for Country Night at 9 p.m. on June 9. Tony Neal at 5 p.m., Big Al & the Kaholics at 9:30 p.m. on June 10. Reggie Lee at 5 p.m., Big Al & the Kaholics at 9:30 p.m. on June 11. Jah Elect on the deck at 5 p.m. on June 12. DJ BG every Mon.

INTRACOASTAL WEST

BREWSTER’S PIT, 14003 Beach Blvd., Ste. 3, 223-9850 Evolette and Waiting for Brantley at 7 p.m. on June 7. Fallen Templars, Beware The Never Ending, Come What May, Dream Of The Day, Watership Down, Newborn Ransom and Sirena at 6 p.m. on June 9. Motograter, Fallen Templars, Erode, Threshold and Carnivorous Carnival at 7 p.m. on June 10. Vains of Jenna, Northe, Seeking Serenity and Sir Real at 7 p.m. on June 11. Amongst the Forgotten at 6 p.m. on June 12. Tetrarch, Ultracoven, The Silent Asylum, Call It Fiction, Party 4 Three, Amp Station, Sleep Soil and Let It Happen at 7 p.m. on June 14 BREWSTER’S PUB, 14003 Beach Blvd., Ste. 3, 223-9850 Throwback Tue. ’70s, ’80s & top 40. Open mic with CBH every Wed. Karaoke with DJ Randal & live music every Thur., Fri. & Sat. A DJ spins every Mon. BRUCCI’S PIZZA, 13500 Beach Blvd., Ste. 36, 223-6913 Mike Shackelford at 6:30 p.m. every Sat. Brucci’s Live open mic with Mike Shackelford at 6:30 p.m. every Mon. CLIFF’S BAR & GRILL, 3033 Monument Rd., 645-5162 Bad Assets at 8 p.m. on June 9. Circle of Influence on June 10 & 11. Karaoke every Tue. DJ Kevin for ladies nite every Wed. Karaoke with DJ Jack at 9 p.m. every Sun. Live music every Thur., Fri. & Sat. JERRY’S SPORTS GRILLE & STEAKHOUSE, 13170 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 22, 220-6766 Mr. Natural at 7:30 p.m. on June 9, at 8:30 p.m. on June 10 & 11. The Karaoke Dude at 8 p.m. every Mon. Live music outside for Bike Night every Thur. Live music every Fri. & Sat. YOUR PLACE BAR & GRILL, 13245 Atlantic Blvd., 221-9994 Live music on June 10 & 11

JULINGTON CREEK, NW ST. JOHNS COUNTY

HAPPY OURS SPORTS GRILLE, 116 Bartram Oaks Walk, Ste. 101, 683-1964 Live music at 7:30 p.m. every Fri.

SHANNON’S IRISH PUB, 111 Bartram Oaks Walk, 230-9670 Live music every Fri. & Sat.

MANDARIN

AW SHUCKS OYSTER BAR & GRILL, 9743 Old St. Augustine Rd., 240-0368 Open mic with John O’Connor from 7-10 p.m. every Wed. Cafe Groove Duo, Jay Terry and John O’Connor, from 8-11 p.m. every Sat. Live music from 9 p.m.-mid. every Sat. BLUE CRAB CRABHOUSE, 3057 Julington Creek Rd., 260-2722 Live music on the deck every Sun. afternoon CHEERS BAR & GRILL, 11475 San Jose Blvd., 262-4337 Karaoke at 9:30 p.m. every Wed. THE NEW ORLEANS CAFE, 12760 San Jose Blvd., 880-5155 Jazz on the Deck 7-10 p.m. with Sleepy’s Connection every Tue. Open mic with Biker Bob at 7:30 p.m. every Thur. Les B. Fine at 1 p.m. every Reggae Sun. Creekside Songwriters Showcase at 7 p.m. on the last Wed. each month RACK ’EM UP BILLIARDS, 4268 Oldfield Crossing, 262-4030 Craig Hand every Sat. Karaoke at 7 p.m. every Sun. SPECKLED HEN TAVERN & GRILLE, 9475 Philips Hwy., Ste. 16, 538-0811 Live music from 6-9 p.m. every Fri. THE TREE STEAKHOUSE, 11362 San Jose Blvd., 262-0006 The Boril Ivanov Biva Jazz Band from 7-9 p.m. every Thur. David Gum at the piano bar from 7-10 p.m. every Fri.

ORANGE PARK, MIDDLEBURG

CHEERS BAR & GRILL, 1580 Wells Rd., 269-4855 Karaoke at 9:30 p.m. every Wed. & Sat. CRACKERS LOUNGE, 1282 Blanding Blvd., 272-4620 Karaoke every Fri. & Sat. THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959 John Michael every Wed.-Sat. THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611 The Whey on June 9. Ghost Riders on June 10 & 11. DJ Waldo every Tue. DJ Papa Sugar every Wed. SENOR WINGS, 700 Blanding Blvd., 375-0746 DJ Andy spins Karaoke every Wed. DJ Tammy spins Karaoke every Fri.

PALATKA

DOWNTOWN BLUES BAR & GRILLE, 714 St. Johns Ave., (386) 325-5454 Mojo Chillin at 8:30 p.m. on June 11

ST. JOHNS TOWN CENTER, TINSELTOWN

Total Trash: The Seattle-based, self-professed “Punk for the People” band The Spits (pictured) perform along with TV Ghost and Alligator at 8 p.m. on June 12 at Café Eleven, 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine. Fans of such garage rockers as The Mummies and The Gories will dig the costumed punk of these Pacific Northwest ne’erdo-wells. Advance tickets are $8; $10 at the door. 460-9311.

PONTE VEDRA

AQUA GRILL, 950 Sawgrass Village Dr., 285-3017 Murray Goff on June 12 NINETEEN at SAWGRASS, 110 Championship Way, 273-3235 Time2Swing at 6 p.m. every Thur. Strings of Fire every Sat. PUSSER’S CARIBBEAN GRILLE, 816 A1A N., Ste. 100, 280-7766 Michael Garrett at 6 p.m. on June 9. Kurt Lanham at 8 p.m. on June 10. Buck Smith Project at 8 p.m. on June 11. Caribbean Legends on June 12. Danny Kent at 7 p.m. on June 13 URBAN FLATS, 330 A1A N., 280-5515 High Tides of Jazz at 7:30 p.m. on June 9. Evans Bros. at 7:30 p.m. on June 10. Darren Corlew Band on June 11. Darren Corlew every Tue. Soulo & Deron Baker at 6 p.m. every Wed.

RIVERSIDE, WESTSIDE

FATKATS NIGHT CLUB, 1187 S. Edgewood Ave., 994-5201 Waylay plays every Thur. Live music & DJ Lavo spinning hip hop, rock, reggae, punk; Caden spins house, techno, breaks, drum & bass at 9 p.m. every Flashback Fri. HJ’S BAR & GRILL, 8540 Argyle Forest Blvd., 317-2783 Karaoke with DJ Ron at 8:30 p.m. every Tue. & DJ Richie at every Fri. Live music every Sat. Open mic at 8 p.m. every Wed. KICKBACKS, 910 King St., 388-9551 Dave Massey every Tue. Ray & Taylor every Thur. Robby Shenk every Sun. THE LOFT, 925 King St., 476-7283 DJs Wes Reed & Josh K every Thur. LOMAX LODGE, 822 Lomax St., 634-8813 DJ Dots every Tue. Milan da Tin Man every Wed. DJ Christian every Sat. DJ Spencer every Sun. DJ Luminous every Mon. METRO, 2929 Plum St., 388-8719 DJ Chadpole every Fri. & Sat. Karaoke with KJ Rob every Sun., Mon. & Tue. MONROE’S SMOKEHOUSE BBQ, 4838 Highway Ave., 389-5551 Bluegrass Nite every Fri. THE MURRAY HILL THEATRE, 932 Edgewood Ave., 388-7807 I Drive a Station Wagon, Ark Harbour, For What It’s Worth, Sumerlin and Me & the Trinity at 7:30 p.m. on June 10. The City Harmonic, Lights & Motion and Man Apart on June 11 WALKERS, 2692 Post St., 894-7465 Jax Arts Collaborative every Tue. Patrick & Burt every Wed. DJ Jeremiah every Thur. Acoustic every Thur.-Sat. Dr. Bill & His Solo Practice of Music at 5 p.m. every Fri.

ST. AUGUSTINE

A1A ALE WORKS, 1 King St., 829-2977 The Committee on June 9, 10 & 11 AMICI ITALIAN RESTAURANT, 1915 A1A S., 461-0102 Fermin Spanish guitar from 6-8 p.m. every Thur. ANN O’MALLEY’S, 23 Orange St., 825-4040 Open mic with Smokin Joe from 7-10 p.m. on June 7. Strumstick at 8:30 p.m. on June 10. Irish By Marriage at 1 p.m., Colapsable B at 8:30 p.m. on June 11. Karaoke at 8 p.m. on June 12. Live music every Fri. & Sat. THE BRITISH PUB, 213 Anastasia Blvd., 810-5111 Karaoke with Jimmy Jamez at 9 p.m. on June 10 & 11. DJ KC on June 12. Open mic night with TJ at 8:30 p.m. on June 13 CAFE ALCAZAR, 25 Granada St., 825-9948 Live music daily CAFE ELEVEN, 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach, 460-9311 The Spits, TV Ghost and Alligator from 8-11 p.m. on June 12 CELLAR UPSTAIRS, San Sebastian Winery, 157 King St., 826-1594 MidLife Crisis at 7 p.m. on June 10. Deron Baker at 2 p.m., Jimi Graves & Supernatural at 7 p.m. on June 11. Vinny Jacobs at 2 p.m. on June 12 CHICAGO PIZZA & BAKERY, 107 Natures Walk Pkwy., Ste.

101, 230-9700 Greg Flowers hosts open-mic and jazz piano from 7-10 p.m. every Tue. Live music every Fri. CONCH HOUSE LOUNGE, 57 Comares Ave., 829-8646 Jah Creation from 3-7 p.m. on June 12. Brad Newman every Thur. Live music at 3 p.m. every Sat. CREEKSIDE DINERY, 160 Nix Boatyard Rd., 829-6113 Live music on deck Wed.-Sun. CRUISERS GRILL, 3 St. George St., 824-6993 Live music every Fri. & Sat. Chelsea Saddler every Sun. FLORIDA CRACKER CAFE, 81 St. George St., 829-0397 Lonesome Bert & the Skinny Lizard at 5:30 p.m. every Wed. THE FLORIDIAN, 39 Cordova St., 829-0655 Live music every Fri. & Sat. HARRY’S SEAFOOD BAR & GRILLE, 46 Avenida Menendez, 824-7765 Stu Weaver every Mon. JACK’S BARBECUE, 691 A1A Beach Blvd., 460-8100 Jim Essery at 4 p.m. every Sat. Live music every Thur.-Sat. JOHNNY’S, 3009 N. Ponce de Leon Blvd., 829-8333 Montage features electro, dance & indie every Mon. KINGFISH GRILL, 252 Yacht Club Drive, 824-2111 Chubby McG at 6 p.m. on June 8 & 15. Dewey & Rita from 6-9 p.m. on June 9. Ivey Bros. at 7 p.m. on June 10. Katherine Archer at 7 p.m. on June 11. Heartstrings at 4 p.m. on June 12 KING’S HEAD BRITISH PUB, 6460 U.S. 1, 823-9787 Mike Sweet from 6-8 p.m. every Thur. KOZMIC BLUZ PIZZA CAFE & ALE, 48 Spanish St., 8254805 Live music every Fri., Sat. & Sun. LOCAL HEROES CAFE, 11 Spanish St., 825-0060 Glam punk rock dance party Radio Hot Elf with DJ Dylan Nirvana from 9 p.m.-2 a.m. every Fri. MARDI GRAS SPORTS BAR, 123 San Marco Ave., 8238806 Those Guys from 9:30 p.m.-1:30 a.m. on June 10. Open jam nite with house band at 8 p.m. every Wed. Battle of the DJs with Josh Frazetta & Mardi Gras Mike every last Sun. MEEHAN’S IRISH PUB, 20 Avenida Menendez, 810-1923 Live music every Fri. & Sat. MI CASA CAFE, 69 St. George St., 824-9317 Chelsea Saddler noon-4 p.m. every Mon., Tue. & Thur. Amy Hendrickson every Wed. Elizabeth Roth at noon every Sun. MILL TOP TAVERN & LISTENING ROOM, 19 1/2 St. George St., 829-2329 Besides Daniel at 9 p.m. on June 10 & 11. Colton McKenna at 1 p.m. on June 12. Vinny Jacobs every Tue. Todd & Molly Jones every Wed. Colton McKenna at 9 p.m. every Thur. Will Pearsall at 9 p.m. every Mon. THE OASIS, 4000 A1A & Ocean Trace Rd., 471-3424 Live music every Fri. & Sat. THE REEF, 4100 Coastal Hwy., Vilano Beach, 824-8008 Richard Kuncicky from 11 a.m.-2:30 p.m. every Sun. RHETT’S PIANO BAR & BRASSERIE, 66 Hypolita St., 825-0502 Live jazz at 7 p.m. every night SANGRIAS PIANO BAR, 35 Hypolita St., 827-1947 Soul Searchers every Wed. Jim Asalta every Thur. Jazz every Fri. The Housecats every Sat. Sunny & the Flashbacks every Sun. SCARLETT O’HARA’S, 70 Hypolita St., 824-6535 Lil Blaze & DJ Alex hosts Karaoke every Mon. THE TASTING ROOM, 25 Cuna St., 810-2400 Bossa nova with Monica da Silva & Chad Alger from 5-8 p.m. every Sun. TRADEWINDS, 124 Charlotte St., 829-9336 Quick Draw at 8:30 p.m. on June 10. Elizabeth Roth from 1-4 p.m., Quick Draw at 9 p.m. on June 11. Mark Hart at 5 p.m. every Mon.Wed. Open mic every Thur. Mark Hart & Jim Carrick every Fri. Elizabeth Roth at 1 p.m., Mark Hart at 5 p.m. every Sat. Keith Godwin at 1 p.m., Wade at 5 p.m. every Sun. Mantanzas at 9 p.m. Sun.-Thur. ZHANRAS, 108 Anastasia Blvd., 823-3367 Deron Baker & Soulo every Tue. DJ Cep spins ’80s & disco every Sun. Vinny Jacobs open mic every Mon.

AROMAS CIGARS & WINE BAR, 4372 Southside Blvd., Ste. 201, 928-0515 W. Harvey Williams every Tue. DJ Royal every Wed. & Thur. DJ Benz every Fri. DJ T-Rav every Sat. THE GRAPE, 10281 Midtown Pkwy., 642-7111 Rebecca Day at 8 p.m. on June 10. Live music every Fri. & Sat. John Earle every Mon. DJ Mikeology every Thur. ISLAND GIRL Wine & Cigar Bar, 7860 Gate Pkwy., Ste. 115, 854-6060 Jazz every Wed. Live music every Thur., Fri. & Sat. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 9734 Deer Lake Court, Ste. 1, 9971955 Nate Holley on June 10. Ivey Brothers on June 11. Billy Buchanan on June 12. Open mic nite every Tue. SEVEN BRIDGES GRILLE & BREWERY, 9735 Gate Parkway N., 997-1999 Chuck Nash every Thur. Live music at 10 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. SUITE, 4880 Big Island Dr., 493-9305 Danny Lozada at 7:30 p.m. on June 7. A-Rock and C’Nergy at 9 p.m. on June 9. Dirty/ Jax and C’Nergy at 7:30 p.m. on June 10. Dirty/Jax and Latraia Savage & the Allstars at 7:30 p.m. on June 11. Latin Wave on June 14 URBAN FLATS, 9726 Touchton Rd., 642-1488 Live music every Fri. & Sat. WHISKY RIVER, 4850 Big Island Drive, 645-5571 Alive After Five with The Voltage brothers on June 9. Down Theory every Mon. A DJ spins every Fri. & Sat. WILD WING CAFE, 4555 Southside Blvd., 998-9464 Live music every Fri. & Sat. Karaoke every Mon.

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK

BASIL THAI & SUSHI, 1004 Hendricks Ave., 674-0190 Live music every Sat. ENDO EXO, 1224 Kings Ave., 396-7733 Paten Locke spins classic boombox, hip hop & tru school every Thur. DJ J-Money spins jazz, soul, R&B, house every Fri. DJ Manus spins top 40 & dance every Sat. Reggae every Sun. Open mic with King Ron & T-Roy every Mon. EUROPEAN STREET CAFE, 1704 San Marco Blvd., 399-1740 Jacksonville Jazz Collective with Mike Emmert, Juan Rollan, Ray Callendar, Joshua Bowlus, Stan Piper and John Lumpkin Jr. on June 9. Monica da Silva and Chad Alger at 8 p.m. on June 14. Jazz every 2nd Tue. HAVANA-JAX CUBA LIBRE BAR LOUNGE, 2578 Atlantic Blvd., 399-0609 MVP Band from 6-9 p.m., DJs No Fame & Dr. Doom every Wed. Jazz every Thur. DJ Omar spins dance every Fri. DJs Harry, Rico & Nestor spin salsa every Sat. JACK RABBITS, 1528 Hendricks Ave., 398-7496 Nashville Pussy and Koffin Kats on June 7. Real City Radio, Captain We’re Sinking, Syncodestroyo, Status Faux and Destin For Fla on June 9. The Parlotones, For the Future, The Westerlies and The Daylights on June 10. A Faylene Sky, Sleep City, Threshold, Myka Relocate and Dream of the Day on June 11. Bubbly Joe, The Mantras and Taste Buds on June 12. School Boy Humor, Hollander and Taylor Brash on June 13. Consider the Source and Sinister Moustache on June 14 MATTHEW’S, 2107 Hendricks Ave., 396-9922 Bossa nova with Monica da Silva & Chad Alger at 7 p.m. every Thur. SQUARE ONE, 1974 San Marco Blvd., 306-9004 Sidewalk 65 at 9 p.m. on June 11. Soul on the Square & Band of Destiny at 8 p.m. every Mon. John Earle Band every Tue. DJs Wes Reed & Matt Caulder spin indie dance & electro every Wed. Split Tone & DJ Comic every Thur.

SOUTHSIDE

BOMBA’S, 8560 Beach Blvd., 997-2291 Open mic from 7-11 p.m. with Chris Hall every Tue. & every first Sun. Live music at 8 p.m. every Fri., at 6 p.m. every Sat. & at 5 p.m. every Sun. CORNER BISTRO & Wine Bar, 9823 Tapestry Park Cir., Ste. 1, 619-1931 Matt “Pianoman” Hall at 8 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. EUROPEAN STREET CAFE, 5500 Beach Blvd., 398-1717 John Carver Band (Eric Denton and Dan McClintock) at 8 p.m. on June 11 LATITUDE 30, 10370 Philips Hwy., 365-5555 Open mic every Wed. Whyte Python every Flashback Fri. Live music every Thur., Fri. & Sat.

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

BOOTS-N-BOTTLES, 12405 N. Main St., Ste. 7, Oceanway, 647-7798 Open mic every Wed. Karaoke at 8 p.m. every Thur. A DJ spins every Fri. & Sat. Live music every weekend DAMES POINT MARINA, 4518 Irving Rd., 751-3043 Black Creek Ri’zin at 7 p.m. on June 10. Band on the Run at 4 p.m. on June 11. Mystic Vibes at 3 p.m. on June 12. FLIGHT 747 LOUNGE, 1500 Airport Rd., 741-4073 Big Engine every Thur. Live music every Fri. & Sat. ’70s every Tue. SKYLINE SPORTSBAR & LOUNGE, 5611 Norwood Ave., 517-6973 Bigga Rankin & Cool Running DJs every Tue. & 1st Sun. Fusion Band & DJ every Thur. DJ Scar spins every Sun. THREE LAYERS CAFE, 1602 Walnut St., 355-9791 T&C Band at 7 p.m. on June 10. Goliath Flores at 1 p.m. on June 12 3 LIONS SPORTS PUB & GRILL, 2467 Faye Rd., 647-8625 Open mic every Thur. Live music every Sat. To be included in the live music listing, send all the vitals — time, date, location with street address, city, admission price and contact number — to Dan Brown, 9456 Philips Hwy., Ste. 11, Jacksonville FL 32256 or email events@folioweekly.com.

June 7-13, 2011 | folio weekly | 29

4 1. “Tree of Life” 2. “Ginger Lilies” 3. “Thaw” 4. “Pondscape”

Life As Art

FSCJ celebrates the work of the late artist Ann Holloway Williams with a lifelong retrospective ANN HOLLOWAY WILLIAMS “A CELEBRATION OF JOY AND COLOR” Florida State College at Jacksonville’s South Gallery, 11901 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville The exhibit is on display through June 23 646-2023

he Northeast Florida art scene has changed a lot over the past 70 years and many may thank local artist, teacher and Jacksonville native Ann Holloway Williams for that. Though she wasn’t as well-known in life as other local artists, Williams — who passed away last September at age 84 — is finally getting the recognition she deserves, with a recent retrospective of her work. The exhibit “A Celebration of Joy & Color,” at the South Gallery located on FSCJ’s South Campus, offers more than 50 paintings in Williams’ signature style: primarily abstract pieces with bright colors and floral patterns. Also on display are images of Williams’ bestknown work: the 1,000-foot, glazed-brick mosaic commissioned by architect Taylor Hardwick for the Haydon Burns Library in downtown Jacksonville, now known as arts space 122 Ocean Street. “Ann passed away after an extended sickness,” explains Williams’ good friend Hardwick, now an 85-year-old retiree living in Ponte Vedra Beach. “When I had gone to visit her, she said that she was so sorry that she had never had a solo show. I said, ‘Well, maybe I can help you get one.’” Hardwick decided to make that the “object of my efforts” and see to it that Williams — his friend since 1949

30 | FOLIO WEEKLY | JUNE 7-13, 2011

— would somehow have her art featured on gallery walls. Williams’ closest living relatives are her two nieces. Over her career, they collected pieces of their aunt’s work that had never been shown. The result is a hefty accumulation of watercolors, oil paintings, sketchbooks, notebooks and illuminations. “She was an innovator,” Hardwick says. “She always tried

was even featured at the 1964 World’s Fair in New York City. “She was an extremely talented artist and teacher,” Hardwick explains. “It was just that she was very introverted when it came to publicity.” In his statement for the retrospective, Hardwick writes, “Ann represented all the talents, ambitions and versatility of a dedicated teacher of art and its importance

Williams’ best-known work remains the 1,000-foot, glazed-brick mosaic commissioned for the old Haydon Burns Library in downtown Jacksonville. new processes and techniques.” Williams was also a master of large-scale installations. Today, her work adorns some of the most majestic buildings in Jacksonville, including stained-glass designs for Atonement Lutheran Church, Wesley Manor and Arlington Chapel, and a painted mural commissioned by architect Bob Broward as part of a Klutho Building restoration. Williams’ passion for creativity spilled over into her professional life. Armed with a fine arts degree from Florida State College, Williams spent 62 years teaching art in Duval County schools, Jacksonville Art Museum, Jacksonville Children’s Museum and in senior citizen communities. Her work currently hangs in several Florida museums, universities and galleries, private collections and corporate offices. She

in our lives. … Throughout the years, the two of us remained compatriots and mentors for each other. We shared drawings, ideas and sentiments through the years, which kept our friendship strong and fruitful. Her world will forever brighten the visual environment of Jacksonville — our world — and will enhance the lives of all of us who knew her.” This world — the joyful use of color, imaginative spirit and enthusiasm — was a direct result of Williams’ personality. “She was the most cheerful, optimistic and delightful person. She never complained about anything,” Hardwick remembers. “She was a wonderful personality and I feel very satisfied that Ann got what she deserved with this exhibit.” Kara Pound themail@folioweekly.com

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JUNE 7-13, 2011 | FOLIO WEEKLY | 31

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s, please call your advertising representative at 260-9770. RUN DATE: 040511 OOF IF POSSIBLE AT 268-3655 OF BENEFIT

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“All Rendered Truth” documents the lives and inspirations of Southern American folk artists ALL RENDERED TRUTH: FOLK ART IN THE AMERICAN SOUTH Screens on Thursday, June 16 at 7 p.m. Grandpa’s Cough Medicine performs at 6:30 p.m. Museum of Contemporary Art Jacksonville’s MOCA Theater, 333 N. Laura St., downtown 366-6911

32 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

Atlanta painter Lorenzo Scott (born in 1934) recounts how he saw some paintings in Manhattan when he was 24, but since he couldn’t afford art lessons, he had to learn “the hard way,” teaching himself how to create impressive works of Christian folk art. “It took me 30 years of painting and sketching to get it right,” explains Scott, regarding his beautiful renderings of “The Pietà,” along with recurring motifs of women smiling beatifically while holding flowers. Thomson, Ga., artist Jake McCord (1945-2009) apparently began painting after witnessing a group of women in a drawing class. His large painted panels are inhabited by animals or a series of women who look almost impossibly two-dimensional. McCord is one of the more colorful characters in “Rendered,” sporting a hat and outfit that are as offbeat as his paintings. The film benefits by getting out of the way of its subject matter, avoiding any attempts at trying to portray these people as freaks, outcasts or anthropological studies. They are as varied in their personalities as they are in their works. In her painting and anecdotes, Bernice Sims describes an idyllic childhood in Hickory Hill, Ala., with an encouraging tale of racial harmony. The few white families who lived in the community were the de facto minority, yet due to the two equalizers of poverty and religious tolerance, the African-American oil painter grew up fairly indifferent to prejudice. Eventually, Sims participated in the Civil Rights march in Selma in the ’60s. Perhaps the best known of the film’s artists is Mose Tolliver. Signing his work “Mose T.” writing the “s” backwards, Tolliver (1920-2006) seems more than happy to regale his audience with his life story, describing his 1982 encounter with then-First Lady Nancy Reagan. He goes on to brag that Pres. Reagan had invited the Alabama-born painter to live “in the basement” of the White House. Tolliver declined the request, ostensibly for creative reasons.

n the beginning of director Patrick Long’s documentary, “All Rendered Truth,” Birmingham, Ala., artist Lonnie Holley interrogates the audience on the other side of the camera: “When you all look around, do y’all see my mind or do you see art? This is what I’m asking, because we all need to answer this question. Are you looking at the art, or are you looking at the artist’s mind?” It’s a damned good question, given the almost obsessive fascination some have with the backstories of folk and outsider artists. This 1995 film attempts to answer his inquiry in a winning and casual manner. Blending artwork and interviews with 21 artists of the American Southeast, the film succeeds in creating a thumbnail sketch of a vibrant artistic region. “All Rendered Truth” is a cinematic love letter from director Long and producer Scott Blackwell, the founder of the Folk Artists’ Foundation (folkartistsfoundation.org), based in Greenville, S.C. The film’s 57-minute runtime benefits from the filmmakers’ respectful approach to these artists, making something that’s informative without seeming paternalistic. Says Blackwell, “They’re not as simple as they may seem from the outside.” Of course, by “outside,” Blackwell is referring to us — the audience — who are allowed direct access to the porches, yards and workshops of a collective of creative types, some of whom seem pleasantly indifferent to the camera. The film’s use of subtitles for some of those interviewed initially seems off-putting, but it’s actually beneficial in understanding some of the thick rural accents. During the sequence featuring Burgess Dan Brown Dulaney (1914-2001) of Fulton, Miss., the dbrown@folioweekly.com 84-year-old seems as puzzled as the audience at the clay figures he has mass-produced. Dulaney began making these totem-like figures in the 1970s, getting his materials from a local mudhole not far from the cabin where he was born. He sculpted the pieces in his kitchen and then allowed them to dry on his porch in the summer sun. In the film, Dulaney shrugs his shoulders and laughs, surrounded by works that look eerily like preColumbian effigies. Many of the film’s artists trace their inspiration to the Lord on high. Others seem to have just arbitrarily decided to create, possibly out of boredom. When it comes to their actual training and technique, each reveals an Atlanta-based folk artist Lorenzo Scott (pictured, his work “Baptism of Jesus,” 1987, oil on canvas, 48 1/8”x48 1/18,” courtesy Smithsonian independent vision that borders American Art Museum) is featured in the documentary “All Rendered Truth.” on defiance.

Works by local artist and arts educator Jim Draper are currently featured at Paradise Key South Beach sales center, 3611 Paradise Way, Jax Beach. 699-5449.

PERFORMANCE

THE DIARY OF ANNE FRANK Amelia Community Theatre presents this dramatic adaptation of the Holocaust memoirist’s diary at 8 p.m. on June 9, 10 and 11 207 Cedar St., Fernandina Beach. Tickets are $20; $10 for students. The play is also staged at 8 p.m. on June 16, 17, 18, 23, 24 and 25 and at 2 p.m. on June 19. 261-6749. THE DROWSY CHAPERONE Theatre Jacksonville presents this Tony Award-winning musical comedy at 8 p.m. on June 10 and 11 and at 2 p.m. on June 12 at 2032 San Marco Blvd., Jacksonville. Tickets are $25 on Fri. and Sat.; $20 for seniors, military, students on Thur. and Sun. 396-4425. THE ART OF DINING Orange Park Community Theatre stages this culinary comedy at 8 p.m. on June 10 and 11 and at 3 p.m. on June 12 at 2900 Moody Ave., Orange Park. Tickets are $15. The play also runs June 17, 18, 19, 24 and 25. 276-2599. THE EXPLODING BISHOPS This improv comedy crew performs at 7:30 p.m. on June 8 and the first Wed. of each month at Limelight Theatre’s Koger-Gamache Black Box Theatre, 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine. Tickets are $5. 825-1164. FRINGE ON THE ROCKS Players by the Sea presents its summer festival of eclectic film, performance, cabaret and dining at 8 p.m. on June 9, 10 and 11 at 106 Sixth St. N., Jax Beach. Tickets are $8; $50 for a festival pass. 249-0289. THE ODD COUPLE Alhambra Theatre & Dining presents former “Brady Bunch” star Barry Williams in Neil Simon’s raucous comedy about incompatible roommates at 8 p.m. on June 7-12 and 14, at 1:15 p.m. on June 11 and at 2 p.m. on June 12 at 12000 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. Tickets range from $42-$49. 641-1212. GENESIS BENEFIT AND SHOWCASE Jacksonville Centre of the Arts and The Performers Academy host a party and dinner at 6 p.m. on June 12 at Jacksonville University’s Terry Concert Hall, 2800 University Blvd. N., Jacksonville. A benefit concert is held at 7:30 p.m. in the school’s Swisher Theater. Tickets for the party are $65; $25 for the concert. 322-7672. jaxgenesis.com THE LIVES AND WIVES OF HENRY FLAGLER The Limelight Theatre presents this dinner theater performance about the famous Northeast Florida tycoon at 6 p.m. on June 12 at The Raintree Restaurant, 102 San Marco Ave., St. Augustine. Tickets are $39.95. 825-1164.

CALLS & WORKSHOPS

SCREENWRITING SUCCESS ESSENTIALS Sharon Y. Cobb teaches intermediate screenwriting techniques from 9 a.m.-5 p.m. on June 11 at University of North Florida’s University Center, 12000 Alumni Drive, Jacksonville. An $89 registration fee is required. 620-6400. AUDITIONS FOR SECOND SAMUEL The Limelight Theatre seeks to cast 11 roles (ages 20-70) for its production of the 1940s-based Southern comedy “Second Samuel” from 2-6 p.m. on June 11 at 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine. Bring a headshot and résumé. The show runs Aug. 5-28. 825-1164. COMEDY PLAY NEEDS ACTORS Auditions for the locally penned comedy “Testing: A Week in the Life of an Ex-Teacher” are held from 3:30-5:30 p.m. on June 11 at Pablo Creek Branch Library, 13295 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. 314-5801. AMATEUR NIGHT AUDITIONS AT THE RITZ The Ritz Theatre & LaVilla Museum holds auditions for its upcoming amateur night at 5 p.m. on June 9 at 829 N. Davis St., Jacksonville. 632-5555. ADULT ART CLASSES Beginning and advanced acrylics, watercolors, photoshop, drawing, oil painting and portrait painting classes are held Mon.-Sat. at The Cultural Center at Ponte Vedra, 50 Executive Way, Ponte Vedra. Fees vary. 280-0614. ccpvb.org CORSE GALLERY WORKSHOPS

Beginning and advanced acrylics, watercolors, oil painting and portrait painting classes are held Mon.-Sat. at Corse Gallery & Atelier, 4144 Herschel St., Jacksonville. Fees vary. 388-8205. corsegalleryatelier.com WEST AFRICAN DRUM & DANCE A drumming class is held at 5 :30 p.m., and an African dance class is held at 6:45 p.m. every Fri. at St. Johns Cultural Arts Center, 370 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine. Each class is $10. 315-1862. THEATRICAL ARTS Classes in theatrical performance, including song and dance, are held Mon.-Fri. at The Performers Academy, 3674 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. Fees vary. 322-7672. theperformersacademy.com DANCE INSTRUCTION Braided Light Dance Project offers adult intermediate ballet classes from 6:15-7:45 p.m. every Wed. and from 1-2:30 p.m. every Sat. at Barbara Thompson School of Dance, 8595 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville. Each class is $10. 997-0002.

CLASSICAL & JAZZ

THE RITZ CHAMBER PLAYERS This acclaimed local ensemble performs at 2 p.m. on June 7 at Museum of Contemporary Art Jacksonville, 333 N. Laura St. Tickets are $8 for non-members. 366-6911. JOHN THOMAS GROUP Pianist Thomas leads his combo at 7 p.m. on June 7 at Culhane’s Irish Pub, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach. 249-9595. EIGHTH BLACKBIRD This eclectic combo performs at 11 a.m. and 7:30 p.m. on June 8 at Prince of Peace Lutheran Church, 2600 Atlantic Ave., Fernandina Beach. Tickets for the evening performance are $30. 261-1779. BETH NEWDOME FELLOWSHIP ARTISTS Violinists Amalia Hall and Ike See, violist Rachel Kuipers and cellist Natalie Helm perform at 1 p.m. on June 9 at Savannah Grand of Amelia Island, 1900 Amelia Trace Court, Fernandina Beach. 261-1779. FROM BACH TO BOSSA NOVA Vocalist Luciana Souza, guitarist Romero Lumbambo and percussionist Cyro Baptista perform at 7 p.m. on June 9 at La Tierra Prometida (formerly First Baptist Church), 416 Alachua St., Fernandina Beach. Tickets are $45. 261-1779. JOSHUA BOWLUS SEXTET This jazz combo performs at 8 p.m. on June 9 at European Street Café, 1704 San Marco Blvd., Jacksonville. Tickets are $10. 399-1740. CZECH IT OUT! MASTERPIECES OF ANTONIN DVORAK The Amelia Island Chamber Music Festival presents the Beth Newdome Fellowship Artists accompanied by pianist Julie Coucheron, violist James Dunham and cellist Christopher Rex at 7:30 p.m. on June 10 at Prince of Peace Lutheran Church, 2600 Atlantic Ave., Fernandina Beach. Tickets are $15. 261-1779. VOICES OF THE SPIRIT Native American flutist R. Carlos Nakai performs at 7:30 p.m. on June 11 at Prince of Peace Lutheran Church, 2600 Atlantic Ave., Fernandina Beach. A collection of Zuni Indian fetish carvings are also featured. Tickets are $30. 261-1779. CLASSICAL AT UNITARIAN Clarinetist Brandon Mosely performs works by Weber and Debussy at 10:45 a.m. on June 12 at Unitarian Universalist Church, 7405 Arlington Expressway, Jacksonville. 962-1278. HULS CLARK DUO Violinist Max Huls and pianist Christine Clark perform at 2:30 p.m. on June 12 at the Main Library’s Hicks Auditorium, 303 N. Laura St., Jacksonville. 630-2665. JAZZ ON THE BEACH The Jacksonville Beach Summer Jazz Concert Series features Lin Rountree at 5 p.m., Steve Cole & Shilts at 6:15 p.m. and Spyro Gyra at 7:30 p.m. on June 12 at SeaWalk Pavilion, 11 First St. N., Jax Beach. 247-6100. THE MANY MOODS OF RACHEL: BEER & G STRINGS Violinist Rachel Barton Pine performs works by Bach and Black Sabbath at 7 p.m. on June 12 at the Palace Saloon, 117 Centre

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St., Fernandina Beach. Tickets are $45. 261-1779. FT. CLINCH CANDLELIGHT CONCERT Soprano Alison Buchanan, pianist Elizabeth Pridgen, clarinetist Terrence Patterson and violinist Philip Pan perform at 7:30 p.m. on June 14 and 15 at Historic Ft. Clinch, 2601 Atlantic Ave., Fernandina Beach. Tickets for each night are $25. 261-1779. JUST JAZZ QUINTET This jazzy five-piece performs at 7 p.m. on June 14 at Culhane’s Irish Pub, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach. 249-9595.

ART WALKS & FESTIVALS

DOWNTOWN FRIDAY MARKET Arts & crafts and local produce are offered every Fri. from 10 a.m.-2 p.m. at The Jacksonville Landing, 2 Independent Drive. 353-1188. RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET The Arts Market is held from 10 a.m.-4 p.m. every Sat. beneath the Fuller Warren Bridge on Riverside Avenue, Jacksonville and features local and regional artists, strolling performers, bands and a farmers market. Admission is free. 554-6865, 389-2449. riversideartsmarket.com SECOND SATURDAY ARTRAGEOUS ART WALK The galleries of downtown Fernandina Beach are open from 5:30-8 p.m. on June 12 for this self-guided tour. 277-0717.

ADVERTISING PROOFMUSEUMS

BEACHES MUSEUM & HISTORY CENTER 413 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 241-5657. Local author Bill Reynolds is featured at a book-signing at 5 p.m. on June 10. The Lee McDonald-curated show, “Seasons and Conservation in our Coastal Region,” is on display through July 2, featuring environmentally themed works in various media. Diana Patterson’s “Acrylics and Old Photos” is on display through Aug. 2. CUMMER MUSEUM OF ART & GARDENS 829 Riverside Ave., Jacksonville, 356-6857. Curator Holly Sales Rep Keris discusses “The AM Royal Dish: Passion. Power. Porcelain,” at 7 p.m. on June 7. “Art for Two” allows kids ages 3-5 and an adult the chance to explore the galleries and create art from 10:30 a.m.-noon on June 11. Fee is $15 per pair; $10 for members. “The Neighborhood as Art: Celebrating the Riverside Avondale Area” opens from 4-8 p.m. on June 14 and runs through July 31. The exhibit, “Ralph H. & Constance I. Wark Collection of Early Meissen Porcelain,” is on display through Dec. 31. “On the Silk Road and the High Seas: Chinese Ceramics, Culture, and Commerce” is on display through Aug. 14. The restored Tudor Room gallery is open through Dec. 31. CRISP-ELLERT ART MUSEUM 48 Sevilla St., St. Augustine, 826-8530. The exhibit “Inspired by Italy,” featuring recent work by Flagler students created during their recent trip abroad, runs through June 24. KARPELES MANUSCRIPT MUSEUM 101 W. First St., Jacksonville, 356-2992. “Spiritualism,” featuring manuscripts of Harry Houdini’s and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s, is on display through Aug. 27. Overstreet Ducasse’s “Mixed Media” is on display through July 28. The permanent collection features a variety of rare manuscripts. Open Tue.-Fri., 10 a.m.-3 p.m.; Sat. 10 a.m.-4 p.m. MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART JACKSONVILLE 333 N. Laura St., Jacksonville, 366-6911. The Ritz Chamber Players perform at 2 p.m. on June 7. The film “All Rendered Truth” is screened at 7 p.m. on June 16. Christina West’s exhibit, “What a Doll: The Human Object as Toy,” runs through Aug. 28. “Stranger in Paradise: The Works of Reverend Howard Finster” runs through Aug. 28. Family Fun Free Day is held from noon-4 p.m. every Sun. Open Tue.Sun. mocajacksonville.org RITZ THEATRE & MUSEUM 829 N. Davis St., Jacksonville, 632-5555. Amateur Night Auditions are held at 5 p.m. on June 9. “Lift Ev’ry Voice in LaVilla,” an exhibit of African-American history in Jacksonville, is on permanent display. Admission is $6 for adults, $3 for children, students and seniors. Open Tue.-Sun. ST. AUGUSTINE PIRATE AND TREASURE MUSEUM 12 S. Castillo Drive, St. Augustine. (877) 467-5863. This museum houses one of the largest collections of authentic pirate-related artifacts in the world, including the 17th century treasure chest of Capt. Thomas Tew. ST. PHOTIOS NATIONAL SHRINE 41 St. George St., St. Augustine, 289-2805. An exhibit of Byzantine-style icons by Fernando Arango-Fernandez runs through Sept. 25.

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GALLERIES

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ANCHOR BOUTIQUE 210 St. George St., C2, St. Augustine, 808-7078. The exhibit “Threads,” featuring works by clothing designer Tara Ferreira and jewelry designer Laurel Baker, is on display through June. THE ART CENTER COOPERATIVE GALLERY 31 W. Adams St., Jacksonville, 355-1757. The MINI Collection is featured through June. THE ART CENTER PREMIER GALLERY Bank of America Tower, 50 N. Laura St., Jacksonville, 355-1757. The juried “City Sounds” show is featured through June 28.

No, not the Spiro Agnew Jazz Explosion! The Jacksonville Beach Summer Jazz Concert Series features smooth jazz legends Spyro Gyra (pictured) at 7:30 p.m. along with Lin Rountree at 5 p.m. and Steve Cole & Shilts at 6:15 p.m. on June 12 at SeaWalk Pavilion, 11 First St. N., Jax Beach. The Grammy Award-winning group took its name from a misspelling of the green algae spirogyra. 247-6100. THE ART INSTITUTE 8775 Baypine Road, Jacksonville, 486-3000. The reception for the Spring Portfolio Show is held from 5-8 p.m. on June 16. AVONDALE ARTWORKS 3568 St. Johns Ave., Jacksonville, 384-8797. New works by Beth Haizlip and MacTruque are on display through June. BEE GALLERY AND STUDIO 2 Independent Dr., Ste. 108, Jacksonville, (727) 207-3013. Jennifer Woodall is the featured artist for June. BRILLIANCE IN COLOR 25 King St., St. Augustine, 810-0460. “American Impressionists,” featuring works by Leonard Wren, Mary Dolph Wood and Stephen Shortridge, is on display through July 8. FIRST STREET GALLERY 216-B First St., Neptune Beach, 241-6928. Authors Rick Cannizzaro and Frank Gromley are featured at a book signing from 7-9 p.m. on June 10. The ninth annual “Turtle Art” show features local, regional and national artistic renderings, in various media, of endangered sea turtles; it runs through June 27. HASKELL GALLERY Jax International Airport, 14201 Pecan Park Road, 741-3546. A collection of art kites by Melanie Walker and George Peters of Airworks Studios is on display through June. Commissioned work by the two designers is shown in JIA’s Connector hallway. INDIGO ALLEY WINE BAR 316 Centre St., Fernandina Beach, 261-7222. Painter Paul Maley is the featured artist through June. JAXPORT GALLERY 2831 Talleyrand Ave., Jacksonville, 357-3052. Fred Schloth is the featured artist through July 15. NEXT GALLERY 203 N. Laura St., Jacksonville, 356-3474. Artists Sharla Valeski, Caroline Daley and Lee Harvey are featured through June. P.A.ST.A FINE ARTS GALLERY 214 Charlotte St., St. Augustine, 824-0251. Watercolorist Carolyn Hayes Kelso is the featured artist through June. SOUTHLIGHT GALLERY 100 N. Laura St., Jacksonville, 553-6361. Sydney McKenna is the featured artist through June. SOUTH GALLERY FSCJ’s South Campus, 11901 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville, 646-2023. “Ann Holloway Williams: A Celebration of Joy & Color, 1926-2010,” is on display through June 23. UNIVERSITY OF NORTH FLORIDA CARPENTER GALLERY 1 UNF Drive, Rm. 12-1301, Jacksonville, 620-1533. Images from Jaxport’s recent “Faces of the Port” and “Women of the Port” are on display through June 30. VAULT GALLERY 121 W. Forsyth St., Jacksonville, 535-7252. “Murder Art For Insane Architects” is on display through on June. WATERWHEEL ART GALLERY 5047 First Coast Highway, Fernandina Beach, 261-2535. The gallery features works by Marlene Deutcher, Pat Haley and Charbach through June. For a complete list of galleries, log on to folioweekly.com. To list your event, send time, date, location (street address, city), admission price and contact number to print to Dan Brown, 9456 Philips Hwy., Ste. 11, Jacksonville FL 32256 or email dbrown@folioweekly.com.

EVENTS

JACKSONVILLE FOODFIGHT The 21st annual Foodfight is held from 6:30-9 p.m. on June 9 at EverBank Field, at the stadium, downtown Jacksonville. Tickets are $60. Proceeds benefit Second Harvest North Florida’s programs to help fight hunger. jacksonvillefoodfight.org RIVER RALLY POKER RUN The 10th annual Jax River Rally Charity Poker Run, where boaters navigate a 150-mile course on the St. Johns River, starts at 11 a.m. on June 10, with a Parade of Boats, live music and food and drink at The Jacksonville Landing, 2 Independent Drive, downtown. The rally continues at 9:30 a.m. on June 11. Proceeds benefit Camp Amigo, the children’s burn camp. 388-6637. jaxriverrallypokerrun.com CONCERTS IN THE PLAZA Big Pineapple plays at 7 p.m. on June 9 under the oaks at Plaza de la Constitución, located between Cathedral Place and King Street, St. Augustine. The free concerts continue through Sept. 5. Bring lounge chairs. Alcohol is prohibited. staugustinegovernment.com/sites/concerts-plaza MUSIC BY THE SEA The free concert series continues with Bush Doctors from 7-9 p.m. on June 8 at the Pier & Pavilion, 350 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach. Each week, an area restaurant offers meals for less than $10. The series continues each Wed. through Sept. 28. 471-1686. staugbchcivicassoc.com FREE FAMILY CONCERTS The Amelia Island Chamber Music Festival offers free family-friendly concerts, featuring the innovative sextet “eigth blackbird,” at 11 a.m. on June 8 at Prince of Peace Lutheran Church, 2600 Atlantic Ave., Fernandina Beach. Beth Newdome Fellowship Artists perform at 1 p.m. on June 9 at Savannah Grand of Amelia Island, 1900 Amelia Trace Court, Fernandina Beach. No ticket is required for these concerts. 261-1779. aicmf.com RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET Doctor Bill & His Solo Practice, Davin McCoy and Shades of Red perform on June 11 at Riverside Arts Market, held under the Fuller Warren Bridge on Riverside Avenue, downtown. The Arts Market features local and regional artists, a water taxi and a farmers market from 10 a.m.-4 p.m. every Sat. Admission is free. 554-6865, 389-2449. riversideartsmarket.com

POLITICS & ACTIVISM

FAIR TAX MEETING Volunteers for Fair Tax gather at 10 a.m. on June 11 at Adamec Harley Davidson, 8909 Baymeadows Road, Jacksonville. This nonpartisan, grassroots movement aims to get legislation (HR 25/S 13) passed as written. 613-4893. TOWN HALL MEETINGS St. Johns County Administrator Michael Wanchick hosts Town Hall meetings throughout the county in June to share budgetary information and solicit feedback. The meetings are held at 6:30 p.m. on June 9 at Hastings Town Hall, 6195 S. Main St.; at 6:30 p.m. on June 16 at Bartram Trail Branch Library, 60 Davis Pond Blvd., Fruit Cove; at 6:30 p.m. on June 22 at Ponte Vedra Beach Branch Library, 101 Library Blvd., Ponte Vedra and at 6:30 p.m. on June 27 at Main Library, 1960 N. Ponce de Leon Blvd., St. Augustine. 209-0549. sjcfl.us JACKSONVILLE JOURNEY The oversight committee of this crime-fighting initiative meets at 4 p.m. on June 16 in Eighth Floor Conference Room 851, Ball Building, 214 N. Hogan St., Jacksonville. 630-1273.

COMMUNITY INTEREST

IT’S YOUR PROM! JCCI Forward celebrates its 10th anniversary from 7 p.m.-midnight on June 11 at The Hall, 1100 Stockton St., Jacksonville. Wear what you would’ve worn to your own senior prom. Tickets are $10 for JCCI members, $15 for non-members. jcciforward.org MEN WHO COOK The United Negro College Fund’s second annual fundraiser is held from 3-5 p.m. on June 12 at Hyatt Regency Riverfront, 225 E. Coastline Drive, Jacksonville. Tickets are $25. Proceeds benefit needy students. 868-4030. uncf.org BENEFIT DANCE CONCERT The Jacksonville Centre of the Arts and The Performers Academy hold a showcase dinner and the 13th QUANTUM Concert from 7:30-9 p.m. on June 11 at Swisher Theatre, Jacksonville University, 2800 University Blvd.. Tickets are $25; proceeds benefit the Jacksonville Centre of the Arts’ scholarship program. 322-7672. jaxgenesis.com TERPS ALUMNI Meet fellow University of Maryland alumni, friends of Maryland and Terrapin fans at 6:15ish on June 10 at Caribbee Key, 100 First St., Neptune Beach. Dress is beach-casual. Admission is free. 280-9148. LUNCH & LEARN SAFARI SERIES Hang out with giraffes on June 11 at White Oak Conservation Center, 581705 White Oak Road, Yulee. Admission is $75 for non-members, $50 for members. 225-3396. wocenter.org GLOBAL DAY OF PRAYER The 2011 Day of Prayer is held from 6-10 p.m. on June 11 at Veterans Memorial Arena, 300 Randolph Blvd., downtown. globaldayofprayer.com BIKERS FOR LIFE This benefit to raise awareness for the bone marrow donor registry starts at 9 a.m. on June 11 at Ton Up Jacksonville, 580 College St., Jacksonville. A continental breakfast is served. The ride ends at Whitey’s Fish Camp, 2032 C.R. 220, Fleming Island. Factory Black performs, and a free fish dinner for every rider and passenger and raffles are featured. Fees are $15 for riders, $10 for pas-

sengers. Proceeds benefit the Be The Match registry for bone marrow donations. 619-6955. bethematchfoundation.org MARINA DAY The third annual free National Marina Day is observed from 10 a.m.-2 p.m. on June 11 at Camachee Cove, 3070 Harbor Drive, St. Augustine. A pirate raid, blindfolded dingy races, a dunk tank and homemade sailboat races are featured. Proceeds benefit Rodeheaver Boys Home. 829-5676. LUNCH-N-LEARN Certified financial planner Mark Dennis discusses Savvy Social Security Planning at 11:30 a.m. on June 7 at Picante Grill, 464073 S.R. 200, Yulee. Admission is $15. islandchamber.com SAVAGE ANCIENT SEAS This exhibit, which opens on June 11, features fossils of marine animals from the collection of paleontologist Mike Triebold at Museum of Science and History, 1025 Museum Circle, Jacksonville. Open 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Mon.-Thur., till 8 p.m. on Fri., 6 p.m. on Sat. and from 1-6 p.m. every Sun. 396-7062. themosh.org JTA’S SUMMER YOUTH PASS It’s the ticket to unlimited rides on the bus and Skyway and free admission to Jacksonville Suns’ home games. Purchase a Summer Youth Pass for $30 for June and receive July for free; add August for $15 more. You must purchase your Summer Youth Pass by June 30, and it’s only for those 18 years and younger. 630-3100. jtafla.com

BOOKS & WRITING

MARY ROSE TAYLOR Taylor, a 20-year veteran of broadcast journalism with CBS, PBS and BBC, discusses her effort to rescue and restore the Margaret Mitchell House in Atlanta at 3 p.m. on June 11 at Anastasia Island Branch Library, 124 Sea Grove Main Street, St. Augustine. 209-3730. FIRST STREET GALLERY Authors Rick Cannizzaro and Frank Gromley are featured at a book signing from 7-9 p.m. on June 10 at 216-B First St., Neptune Beach. 241-6928. firststreetgalleryart.com STEVE BERRY Bestselling historical mystery author Berry signs copies of his new book, “The Jefferson Key,” at 7 p.m. on June 11 at The BookMark, 220 First St., Neptune Beach. 241-9026. FRIDAY 5 O’CLOCK WHISTLE TALKS Bill Reynolds (“Smarty Pants”) appears from 5-6:30 p.m. on June 10 at Beaches Museum & History Center, 380 Pablo Ave., Jax Beach. The weekly program features local authors discussing their books. 241-5657. PUBLICITY WRITERS CRITIQUE GROUP Get some feedback from local authors, editors and publishers from 6-8:30 p.m. on June 7 at Mandarin Library, 3330 Kori Road, Jacksonville. Diane Barton is the featured speaker. 343-4188. cdspublicity.com

KIDS

TEEN ACTING CAMP The 18th annual Academy of Music and Arts Summer Musical Theatre Camp holds rehearsals for “The Wedding Singer” and “Born Yesterday” at 9 a.m. on June 13 at Ancient City Baptist Church, 27 Sevilla St., St. Augustine. For details, call 403-4015. JACKSONVILLE PUBLIC LIBRARY Registration for the summer reading program, which starts on June 13, is underway at all Duval County libraries. Games, performances and field trips are featured. jaxpublixlibrary.org ST. JOHNS COUNTY LIBRARY The summer reading programs for kids and teens run from June 12-Aug. 6 at all St. Johns County libraries. Reading logs are available after June 9, and kids read for prizes and participate in events and field trips. sjcpls.org CAMP BROADWAY The 11th annual Camp Broadway introduces children ages 9-17 to life onstage and behind the scenes, and is held from 8:30 a.m.-5 p.m. and runs June 13-17 at Wilson Center for the Arts, FSCJ’s South Campus, 11901 Beach Blvd., Jacksonville, at a fee of $550. 632-3015. artistseriesjax.org SUMMER FUN CAMP Camps are held from 9 a.m.-2 p.m. Mon.-Fri., June 13-17 and 20-24 at Beaches Museum & History Center, 380 Pablo Ave., Jax Beach. Fee is $175 weekly, $40 daily. 241-5657. bm-hc.com VISUAL ARTS CAMP The Ortega Visual and Performing Arts Camp for kids in grades 1-6, is held from 9:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. June 13-24 at Ortega United Methodist Church, 4807 Roosevelt Blvd., Jacksonville. Camp fee is $170 (includes materials and snacks). 389-5556 ext. 116. DANCE CAMP Douglas Anderson School of the Arts offers a summer dance intensive for kids in grades 6-12, from 9 a.m.-3:10 p.m. June 15, 16, 20-23, 27-30 (session 1) and the African Diaspora in Dance workshop, held July 5, 6 and 7 (session 2) at DA School, 2445 San Diego Road, Jacksonville. Call for fees and details, 390-2971. da-arts.org JAX ZOO Rescued penguins are housed in the Tuxedo Coast exhibit, and endangered wood storks’ nests are alive with chicks this month. Open from 9 a.m.-5 p.m. daily. 757-4463. jacksonvillezoo.org AMELIA ARTS ACADEMY Amelia Arts offers camps and summer workshops for kids 4-11 from 9 a.m.-3 p.m. weekdays, June 20-Aug. 12 at 516 S. 10th St., Fernandina Beach. Activities include painting, storytelling, band, clay working, global art and music. 277-1225. ameliaartsacademy.org ICE SKATING CAMPS & CLASSES Jacksonville Ice & Sportsplex, 3605 Philips Highway, Southside, offers Hockey

“eighth blackbird” performs as part of the Amelia Island Chamber Music Festival free family-friendly concert series at 11 a.m. on June 8 at Prince of Peace Lutheran Church, 2600 Atlantic Ave., Fernandina Beach. 261-1779. aicmf.com Camp for ages 6-14, Summer Learn to Skate Camp for kids ages 6-14, and Figure Skating Academy Level for ages 8-16. Public sessions are half-price while students are enrolled in Learn to Skate and Learn to Play classes. 399-3223. jaxiceandsportsplex.com

COMEDY

PAT GODWIN The Comedy Zone features All Stars on June 7. Dominique appears at 8 p.m. on June 8, 9 and 10 and at 8 and 10 p.m. on June 11 at 3130 Hartley Road, Ramada Inn, Jacksonville. Tickets are $15-$18. 292-4242. JACKIE KNIGHT’S COMEDY CLUB Phil Perrier and Tommy Torres appear on June 10 and 11 at the Comedy Club, 3009 N. Ponce de Leon Blvd., St. Augustine. Tickets are $12. 461-8843. LATITUDE 30 COMEDY The star of the “Police Academy” movies and a master of voice gymnastics, Michael Winslow appears at 7 p.m. on June 9 and 10 and at 7 and 9 p.m. on June 11 at Latitude 30, 10370 Philips Highway, Southside. Tickets are $20 in advance. 365-5555.

UPCOMING

JCCI STUDY RELEASE: RECESSION RECOVERY June 15, Hyatt Regency Riverfront DIVERSITY JOB FAIR June 16, University of North Florida KEITH URBAN June 17, Veterans Memorial Arena CATS June 17-19, Times-Union Center 48 HOUR FILM PROJECT June 17-21, The Florida Theatre MARTIN LAWRENCE June 23, T-U Center FOLIO WEEKLY’S BEER FEST June 24, Morocco Shrine Auditorium ALEGRIA CIRQUE DU SOLEIL June 29, Veterans Memorial Arena JAGUARS VS. FALCONS Aug. 19, EverBank Field

NATURE, SPORTS & OUTDOORS WORLD OCEANS DAY Celebrate Jacques Cousteau’s birthday and related conservation efforts on June 11 at St. Augustine Alligator Farm Zoological Park, 999 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine. Visitors who wear a red hat on June 11 are admitted at half-price. 824-3337. alligatorfarm.com BEACHES FINE ARTS SERIES TRIATHLON The triathlon is held at 7 a.m. on June 11 at Mickler’s Landing, 1109 Ponte Vedra Blvd., Ponte Vedra Beach. bfasracing.org JACKSONVILLE SUNS The 2010 Southern League Champs continue a homestand against the Birmingham Barons at 7:05 p.m. on June 7 (Family Feast Night), and at 1:05 p.m. on June 8 (Businessperson Special) at the Baseball Grounds, 301 Randolph Blvd., Jacksonville. The Mississippi Braves are the team to beat at 7:05 p.m. on June 15, 16 and 17, at 6:05 p.m. on June 18, and at 1:05 p.m. on June 19. General admission is $12.50. 358-2846. jaxsuns.com ANIMAL LECTURE A ranger discusses the diversity of plant and animal species at 2 p.m. on June 11 at Ribault Club, 11241 Ft. George Road, Ft. George Island. Admission is free. 251-2320. floridastateparks.org/littletalbotisland AMELIA RIVER CRUISES Daily tours of Amelia Island, Jekyll Island, St. Augustine and Kingsley Plantation/Ft. Caroline and Cumberland Island are offered. 261-9972 or email info@

ameliarivercruises.com. ROWING FOR FITNESS Row for fitness and fun with the Bulldog Rowing Club. Adult and youth learn to row classes are offered monthly. Experienced rowers also welcome. 256-5082. bollescrew.org

BUSINESS

SOUTHSIDE BUSINESS MEN’S CLUB WJCT’s Michael Boylan is the featured speaker at noon on June 8 at San Jose Country Club, 7529 San Jose Blvd., Jacksonville. Admission is $20. For reservations, call 396-5559. FINANCIAL PROFESSIONAL ASSOCIATE CAREER FAIR This career fair is held from 9 a.m.-6 p.m. on June 8 at Prudential Insurance Company, 8702 Perimeter Park Blvd., Jacksonville. eventbrite.com WOMEN IN BUSINESS The WIB All Chapter Network dinner is held from 5:30-9 p.m. on June 9 at Deercreek Country Club, 7816 McLauren Road N., Jacksonville. A silent auction is featured. Tickets are $23 in advance, $32 at the door. Proceeds benefit daniel kids. 631-1662. COGGIN COLLEGE OF BUSINESS LUNCHEON Ginny Myrick, Senior Policy Advisor with Holland & Knight, discusses “Careers, Politics & Florida Local Government” at University of North Florida’s Coggin College of Business Alumni Chapter luncheon from 11 a.m.-1 p.m. on June 7 at UNF’s University Center, 1 UNF Drive, Jacksonville. Admission is $20. 620-4805.

CLASSES & GROUPS

IMPROV CLASSES Learn to think on your feet, read others and be creative at The Improv Effect classes, starting June 8, 401-9485. improveffect.com/beginnerclasses.html FREEDOM FROM ADDICTION Buddhist teacher John Jones offers these classes at 7 p.m. on June 16 at Maitreya Kadampa Buddhist Center, 85 Sailfish Drive, Atlantic Beach. 222-8531. MeditationInJacksonville.org COMMUNITY HOSPICE SUPPORT GROUPS Bereavement Support is held every Tue., from 6:30-8 p.m. through July 12 at Neviaser Educational Institute of Community Hospice, 4266 Sunbeam Road, Jacksonville; and every Wed., from 6:30-8 p.m. through July 13 at Acosta-Rua Center for Caring of Community Hospice, 5450 Ramona Blvd., Jacksonville. Support group participants must meet with a Community Hospice bereavement counselor before joining a group. To learn if a Community Hospice therapeutic support group might be right for you, call Roxanne Miller, LCSW, manager of bereavement and community grief, at 407-6330. NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS Do you have a drug problem? Maybe they can help. 358-6262, 723-5683. serenitycoastna. org, firstcoastna.org NAR-A-NON This group meets at 8 p.m. every Tue. and Thur. at 4172 Shirley Ave., Avondale. 945-7168. BRAZILIAN JIU-JITSU Classes are open to men, women and children, beginning, intermediate and advanced, from 7-9 p.m. every Mon.-Thur., and from 10 a.m.-noon every Sat. at East Coast Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, 7035 Philips Highway, Ste. 7, Jacksonville. The first lesson is free. 554-7800. JAX JUGGLERS Future jugglers gather outside at local parks in the summertime; check the website for details. Admission is free. jaxjugglers.org

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Average Entrée Cost: $ = Less than $8 $$ = $8-$14 $$$ = $15-$22 $$$$ = $23 & up BW = Beer, Wine FB = Full Bar CM = Children’s Menu TO = Take Out B = Breakfast L = Lunch D = Dinner F = Folio Weekly distribution point Send changes to mdryden@folioweekly.com

AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH, YULEE (In Fernandina Beach unless otherwise noted.) THE BEECH STREET GRILL Fine dining is offered in a casual atmosphere. The menu includes fresh local seafood, steaks and pasta dishes created with a variety of ethnic influences. Award-winning wine list. FB. L, Wed.-Fri.; D, nightly; Sun. brunch. 801 Beech St. 277-3662. $$$ BRETT’S WATERWAY CAFÉ F At the foot of Centre Street, the upscale restaurant overlooks the Harbor Marina. The menu includes daily specials, fresh Florida seafood and an extensive wine list. FB. L & D, daily. 1 S. Front St. 261-2660. $$$ BRIGHT MORNINGS The small café offers freshly baked goods. B & L daily. 105 S. Third St. 491-1771. $$ CAFÉ 4750 An Italian kitchen and wine bar. Chef de Cuisine Garrett Gooch offers roasted sea bass, frutti di mare soup, clam linguini, panatela bruschetta and fresh gelatos. Dine indoors or on the terrace. FB. B, L & D, daily. 4750 Amelia Island Pkwy., The Ritz-Carlton, Amelia Island. 277-1100. $$$ CAFÉ KARIBO F Eclectic cuisine, served under the oaks in historic Fernandina, features sandwiches and chef’s specials. Alfresco dining. FB. L & D, Tue.-Sat.; L, Sun. & Mon. 27 N. Third St. 277-5269. $$ CHEZ LEZAN BAKERY F European-style breads, pastries, croissants, muffins and pies baked daily. 1014 Atlantic Ave. 491-4663. $ EIGHT Contemporary sports lounge offers burgers, sandwiches, wings and nachos. FB. D, Mon.-Fri.; L & D, Fri. & Sat. The Ritz-Carlton, Amelia Island, 4750 Amelia Island Pkwy., Amelia Island. 277-1100. $$ FERNANDELI F Classics with a Southern touch, like a one-third-pound devil dog, Reubens and pulled pork. Sandwiches and wraps built to order from fresh cold cuts, tuna, egg and turkey salads. L & D, Mon.-Sat. 17B S. Eighth St. 261-0008. $ GENERAL STORE F This new store has a little bit of everything. Breakfast includes hot rope sausage, lunch features the Redneck Reuben. Deli meats, cheeses, chicken, fish, pizzas and pasta, too. BW. B, L & D, daily. 520 Centre St. 310-6080. $ GENNARO’S RISTORANTE ITALIANO F Southern Italian cuisine: pasta, gourmet ravioli, hand-tossed pizzas. Specialties are margharita pizza and shrimp feast. Bread is baked on-site. CM, BW. L & D, daily. 5 S. Second St., 261-9400. 5472 First Coast Highway, Amelia Island, 491-1999. $$ HAPPY TOMATO COURTYARD CAFE & BBQ Pulled pork sandwich, chicken salad and walnut chocolate chunk cookie, served in a laid-back atmosphere. BW. CM. L & D, Mon.-Sat. 7 S. Third St. 321-0707. $$ JACK & DIANE’S F Casual cafe offers steak & eggs, pancakes, Cajun scampi, etouffée, curry pizza, vegan black bean cakes, shrimp & grits, hand-carved steaks. FB. B, L & D, daily. 708 Centre St. 321-1444. $$ KABUKI JAPANESE STEAKHOUSE & SUSHI BAR F Teppanyaki masters create your meal; plus a 37-item sushi bar. BW. D, Tue.-Sun. Amelia Plaza. 277-8782. $$ KELLEY’S COURTYARD CAFE F She crab soup, salads, fried green tomatoes, sandwiches and wraps are served indoors or out on the patio. Vegetarian dishes are also offered. L & D, Mon.-Sat. 19 S. Third St. 432-8213. $ LULU’S AT THE THOMPSON HOUSE F An innovative lunch menu includes po’boys, salads and seafood “little plates” served in a historic house. Dinner features fresh local seafood (Fernandina shrimp every Thur.); nightly specials. BW. L & D, Tue.-Sat., brunch on Sun. Reservations recommended. 11 S. Seventh St. 432-8394. $$ MONTEGO BAY COFFEE CAFE Locally owned and operated, serving specialty coffees and fruit smoothies. Dine in or hit the drive-thru. B & L, Mon.-Sat. 463363 S.R. 200, Yulee. 225-3600. $ MOON RIVER PIZZA F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Northernstyle pizza by the pie or the slice. Choose from more than 20 toppings. Owner-selected wines and a large beer selection. BW. L & D, Mon.-Sat. 925 S. 14th St. 321-3400. $ THE MUSTARD SEED CAFE Organic eatery and juice bar. Extensive, eclectic menu featuring vegetarian and vegan items. Daily specials: local seafood, free-range chicken and fresh organic produce. Wraps, sandwiches, soups. CM. B & L, Mon.-Sat. 833 T.J. Courson Rd. 277-3141. $$ O’KANE’S IRISH PUB F Rustic, genuine Irish pub up front, eatery in back, featuring daily specials, fish-n-chips, and

36 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

soups served in a sourdough bread bowl. FB. L & D, Mon.-Sun. 318 Centre St. 261-1000. $$ PEPPER’S MEXICAN GRILL & CANTINA F The family restaurant offers authentic Mexican cuisine. BW, CM. L & D, daily. 520 Centre St. 272-2011. $$ PICANTE GRILL ROTISSERIE BAR Picante offers flavors of Peru and Latin America, served in a contemporary atmosphere. The menu includes authentic Peruvian cebiche and homestyle empanadas. BW, CM, TO. B, L & D daily. 464073 S.R. 200, Ste. 2, Yulee. 310-9222. $$ PLAE In Spa & Shops at Omni Amelia Island Plantation, the cozy venue offers an innovative and PLAEful dining experience. D, nightly. 277-2132. $$$ SALT, THE GRILL Best of Jax 2010 winner. Elegant dining featuring local seafood and produce, served in a contemporary coastal setting. FB. D, Tue.-Sat. 4750 Amelia Island Pkwy., The Ritz-Carlton, Amelia Island. 491-6746. $$$$ SANDOLLAR RESTAURANT & MARINA F Dine inside or on the deck. Snow crab legs, fresh fish, shellfish dishes. FB. L & D, daily. 9716 Heckscher Dr., Ft. George Island. 251-2449. $$ SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL F Oceanfront dining; local seafood, shrimp, crab cakes, outdoor beachfront tiki & raw bar, covered deck and kids’ playground. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 1998 S. Fletcher Ave. 277-6652. $$ THE SURF F Dine inside or on large The recently opened Blu Tavern features local items like Orange Park salad, as well as cuisine from all over the globe, on Wells Road oceanview deck. Steaks, fresh fish, shrimp in Orange Park. and nightly specials. Late-night menu. FB. L & D, daily. 3199 S. Fletcher Ave. 261-5711. $$ THE BLUE FISH RESTAURANT & OYSTER BAR Fresh GATOR’S DOCKSIDE F See Orange Park. 8650 T-RAY’S BURGER STATION F A favorite local spot; Best seafood, steaks and more are served in a casual Baymeadows Rd. 448-0500. $$ of Jax 2010 winner. Grilled or blackened fish sandwiches, atmosphere. Half-portions are available. CM, FB. L & D, daily. INDIA RESTAURANT F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Extensive homemade burgers. BW, TO. B & L, Mon.-Sat. 202 S. Eighth 3551 St. Johns Ave., Shoppes of Avondale. 387-0700. $$$ menu of entrées, clay-oven grilled Tandoori specialties and St. 261-6310. $ BRICK RESTAURANT F Creative all-American fare like tuna chicken tandoor, fish, seafood and korma. L, Mon.-Sat., D, 29 SOUTH EATS F Part of historic Fernandina Beach’s tartare, seaweed salad and Kobe burger. Outside dining. FB. daily. 9802 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 8. 620-0777. $$ downtown scene. Award-winning Chef Scotty serves L & D, daily. 3585 St. Johns Ave. 387-0606. $$$ LARRY’S GIANT SUBS F With locations all over Northeast traditional world cuisine with a modern twist. L, Tue.-Sat.; D, THE CASBAH F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Middle Eastern Florida, Larry’s piles subs up with fresh fixins and serves Mon.-Sat.; Sun. brunch. 29 S. Third St. 277-7919. $$ cuisine is served in a friendly atmosphere. BW. L & D, daily. ’em fast. Some Larry’s Subs offer B & W and/or serve 3628 St. Johns Ave. 981-9966. $$ breakfast. CM. L & D, daily. 3928 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 9 ESPETO BRAZILIAN STEAK HOUSE F Gauchos carve the (Goodby’s Creek), 737-7740; 8616 Baymeadows Rd. meat onto your plate from serving tables. FB. D, Tue.-Sun., 739-2498. larryssubs.com $ GENE’S SEAFOOD F Serving fresh Mayport shrimp, fish, closed Mon. 4000 St. Johns Ave., Ste. 40. 388-4884. $$$ LEMONGRASS F Upscale Thai cuisine in a metropolitan oysters, scallops, gator tail, steaks and combos. L & D, THE FOX RESTAURANT F Best of Jax 2010 winner. The Fox atmosphere. Chef Aphayasane’s innovative creations include daily. 6132 Merrill Rd. 744-2333. $$ has been a Jacksonville landmark for 50-plus years. Owners roast duckling and fried snapper. BW. R. L, Mon.-Fri.; D, KABUTO JAPANESE STEAK HOUSE & SUSHI BAR F Ian & Mary Chase serve classic diner-style fare, homemade Mon.-Sat. 9846 Old Baymeadows Rd. 645-9911. $$ This restaurant offers steak & shrimp, filet mignon & desserts. B & L daily. 3580 St. Johns Ave. 387-2669. $ MANDALOUN MEDITERRANEAN CUISINE F This lobster, shrimp & scallops, a sushi bar, teppanyaki grill and MOJO NO. 4 F Best of Jax 2010 winner. See Beaches. Lebanese restaurant offers authentic Mediterranean traditional Japanese cuisine. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 10055 3572 St. Johns Ave. 381-6670. $$ cuisine: lahm meshwe, kafta khoshkhas and baked filet of Atlantic Blvd. 724-8883. $$$ ORSAY Best of Jax 2010 winner. The French/American bistro red snapper. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 9862 Old Baymeadows LA NOPALERA Best of Jax 2010 winner. See Intracoastal. focuses on craftsmanship and service. FB. D, Tues.-Sat. Rd. 646-1881. $$ 8818 Atlantic Blvd. 720-0106. 3630 Park St. 381-0909. $$$ MAYURI INDIAN CUISINE F Traditional Indian items include MEEHAN’S TAVERN F This Irish pub and restaurant serves RUAN THAI F The elegant Avondale restaurant offers tandoori specials, South Indian, Indo-Chinese, vegetarian, beef and Guinness stew, Philly cheesesteak sandwiches, authentic Thai cuisine, including curries and pad dishes. CM, biryani and thali style dishes. BW. L & D. 9551 Baymeadows traditional lamb stew and jalapeño poppers, made fresh FB. L & D, Tue.-Sun. 3951 St. Johns Ave. 384-6665. $$$ Rd., Ste. 10. 448-5999. $$ onsite, in a comfy atmosphere. Wifi, HDTVs, non-smoking. TOM & BETTY’S F A Jacksonville tradition for more than NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET F Best of Jax BW. L & D, Wed.-Sun. 9119 Merrill Rd., Ste. 5. 551-7076. $$ 30 years, Tom & Betty’s serves hefty sandwiches with 2010 winner. The organic supermarket offers a full deli and NERO’S CAFE F Nero’s serves traditional Italian fare, classic car themes, along with homemade-style dishes. CM, a hot bar with fresh soups, quesadillas, rotisserie chicken including seafood, veal, beef, chicken and pasta dishes. FB. L & D, Mon.-Sat. 4409 Roosevelt Blvd. 387-3311. $$ and vegan sushi, as well as a fresh juice and smoothie bar. Weekly specials are lasagna, 2-for-1 pizza and AYCE ’town F Owner Meghan Purcell and Executive Chef Scott 11030 Baymeadows Rd. 260-2791. $ spaghetti. CM, FB. L, Sun.; D, daily. 3607 University Blvd. N. Ostrander bring farm-to-table to Northeast Florida, offering OMAHA STEAKHOUSE Center-cut beef, fresh seafood 743-3141. $$ American fare with an emphasis on sustainability. FB. L & D, and sandwiches served in an English tavern atmosphere. PITA EXPRESS Philly, chicken fajita, falafel, chicken Mon.-Sat. 3611 St. Johns Ave. 345-2596. $$ The signature dish is a 16-ounce bone-in ribeye. Desserts Caesar salad and eggplant parmigiana pitas, plus omelets include crème brûlée. FB. L & D, daily. 9300 Baymeadows and pancakes. CM. B, L & D, daily. 2754 Trollie Lane. Rd., Embassy Suites Hotel. 739-6633. $$ 674-2637. $ PATTAYA THAI GRILLE F Serving traditional Thai and REGENCY ALE HOUSE & RAW BAR Generous portions vegetarian items and a 40-plus item vegetarian menu in AL’S PIZZA F Best of Jax 2010 winner. See Beaches. 8060 and friendly service in a nautical atmosphere. Fresh fish, a contemporary atmosphere. B/W. L & D, Tue.-Sun. 9551 Philips Hwy. 731-4300. $ specialty pastas, fresh oysters and clams. BW. L & D, daily. Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 1. 646-9506. $$ CAFE CONFLUENCE F This European coffeehouse serves 9541 Regency Square Blvd. S. 720-0551. $$ PIZZA PALACE F See San Marco. 3928 Baymeadows Rd. Italian specialty coffees and smoothies, along with paninis, TREY’S DELI & GRILL F Fresh food served in a relaxed 527-8649. $$ salads and European chocolates. Outdoor dining. BW. L & D, atmosphere. Burgers, Trey’s Reuben, deli sandwiches, pork, STICKY FINGERS F Memphis-style rib house specializes Tue.-Sun. 8612 Baymeadows Rd. 733-7840. $ steaks, seafood, pies. Prime rib specials every Fri. night. in barbecue ribs served several ways. FB. L & D, daily. 8129 CHICAGO PIZZA & SPORTS GRILLE F Chicago-style deepCM, BW. L & D, Mon.-Fri. 2044 Rogero Rd. 744-3690. $$ Point Meadows Way. 493-7427. $$ dish pizzas, hot dogs, Italian beef dishes from the Comastro UNIVERSITY DINER F The popular diner serves familiar family, serving authentic Windy City favorites for 25+ years. breakfast fare and lunch items like meatloaf, burgers, sandCM, FB. L & D, daily. 8206 Philips Hwy. 731-9797. $$ wiches: wraps, BLTs, clubs, melts. Daily specials. BW. B & L, DEERWOOD DELI & DINER F The ’50s-style diner serves Sat. & Sun.; B, L & D, Mon.-Fri. 5959 Merrill Rd. 762-3433. $ (In Jax Beach unless otherwise noted.) malts, shakes, Reubens, Cubans, burgers, and traditional A LA CARTE Authentic New England fare like Maine lobster breakfast items. CM. B & L, daily. 9934 Old Baymeadows Rd. rolls, fried Ipswich clams, crab or clam cake sandwich, fried 641-4877. $$ shrimp basket, haddock sandwich, clam chowdah, birch THE FIFTH ELEMENT F The first four elements are earth, BISCOTTIS F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Mozzarella beer and blueberry soda. Dine inside or on the deck. TO. L, water, air and fire — but here they prepare authentic Indian, bruschetta, Avondale pizza, sandwiches, espresso, Fri.-Tue. 331 First Ave. N. 241-2005. $$ South Indian and Indochinese dishes with artistic flair. Lunch cappuccino. Revolving daily specials. B, Tue.-Sun.; L & D, AL’S PIZZA F Serving hand-tossed gourmet pizzas, buffet includes lamb, goat, chicken, tandoori and biryani calzones and Italian entrees for more than 21 years. Voted daily. 3556 St. Johns Ave. 387-2060. $$$ items. CM. L & D, daily. 9485 Baymeadows Rd. 448-8265. $$ DustinRichard Hegedus Matkin

DINING GUIDE KEY

ARLINGTON, REGENCY

BAYMEADOWS

BEACHES

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

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this is a copyright protected proof © Best Pizza by Folio Weekly readers from 1996-2010. BW. L & D, daily. 303 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach. 249-0002. $ ANGIE’S SUBS F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Subs are madeto-order fresh. Serious casual. Wicked good iced tea. 1436 Beach Blvd. 246-2519. $ BEACHSIDE SEAFOOD RESTAURANT & MARKET F The full fresh seafood market serves seafood baskets, fish tacos, oyster baskets and Philly cheesesteaks. Dine indoors or outside. Beach delivery. CM, BW. L & D, daily. 120 S. Third St. 444-8862. $$ BONO’S PIT BAR-B-Q F Baby back ribs, fried corn, sweet potatoes. BW. L & D, daily. 1307 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach. 270-2666. 1266 S. Third St. 249-8704. bonosbarbq.com $ THE BRASSERIE & BAR French/European-style bistro and bar offers coq au vin, French onion soup, fritto misto, Moroccan-style lamb shank. FB. D, Tue.-Sun. 1312 Beach Blvd. 249-5800. $$$ BUDDHA’S BELLY F Authentic Thai dishes made with fresh ingredients using tried-and-true recipes. FB, TO. L & D, daily. 301 10th Ave. N. 712-4444. $$ CAMPECHE BAY CANTINA F Homemade-style Mexican items are fajitas, enchiladas and fried ice cream, plus margaritas. FB. D, nightly. 127 First Ave. N. 249-3322. $$ CARIBBEE KEY F Best of Jax 2010 winner. AmerCaribbean cuisine includes seafood, steaks and sandwiches. Open-air deck bar upstairs; outdoor dining downstairs. FB. L & D, daily. 100 N. First St., Neptune Beach. 270-8940. $$ CASA MARIA See Springfield. 2429 S. Third St. 372-9000. CHICAGO PIZZA & SPORTS GRILLE F See Baymeadows. 320 N. First St. 270-8565. $$ COPPER TOP SOUTHERN AMERICAN CUISINE F The menu features favorites from The Homestead, like fried chicken, homemade-style biscuits and cornbread, served in a family atmosphere inside a cozy log cabin. CM, FB. Sun. brunch; D, daily. 1712 Beach Blvd. 249-4776. $$ CRAB CAKE FACTORY JAX F Chef Kahn Vongdara presents an innovative menu of seafood dishes and seasonal favorites. FB. L & D daily. The Factory’s Ashley Hayek is a 2010 Best of Jax winner for Best Bartender. 1396 Beach Blvd., Beach Plaza. 247-9880. $$ CRUISERS GRILL F Best of Jax 2010 winner, serving burgers, sandwiches, nachos, tacos, quesadillas and cheese fries. 319 23rd Ave. S. 270-0356. $ CULHANE’S IRISH PUB Four Culhane sisters own and operate the authentic Irish pub, featuring Guy Fieri’s (“Diners, DriveIns & Dives”) fave items — Guinness stew, lamb sliders and fish pie. L, Fri.-Sun.; D, Tue.-Sun.; weekend brunch. FB, CM. 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach. 249-9595. $$ DICK’S WINGS F This NASCAR-themed place serves 365 varieties of wings. The menu also features half-pound burgers, ribs and salads. BW, TO. L & D daily. 2010 Best of Jax winner for Best Chicken Wings. 2434 Mayport Road, Atlantic Beach, 372-0298. 311 N. Third St., 853-5004. $ DWIGHT’S The Mediterranean-style bistro features fresh local seafood, filet mignon, mixed grill and an extensive wine list. D, Tue.-Sat. 1527 Penman Rd. 241-4496. $$$$ ENGINE 15 BREWING COMPANY F This new Jax Beach restaurant serves gastropub fare like soups, salads, flatbreads and specialty sandwiches, including BarBe-Cuban and beer dip. Daily specials, too. CM, BW. L & D, Tue.-Sun. 1500 Beach Blvd., Ste. 217. 249-2337. $ EUROPEAN STREET F See San Marco. 992 Beach Blvd. 249-3001. $ FIONN MACCOOL’S IRISH PUB & RESTAURANT Casual dining with uptown Irish flair, including fish and chips, Guinness beef stew and black-and-tan brownies. FB, CM. L & D, daily. 333 N. First St. 242-9499. $$ THE FISH COMPANY F Fresh, local seafood is served, including Mayport shrimp, fish baskets, grilled tuna and an oyster bar. L & D, daily. CM, FB. 725 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 12, Atlantic Beach. 246-0123. $$ HALA SANDWICH SHOP & BAKERY Authentic Middle Eastern favorites include gyros, shwarma, pita bread, made fresh daily. BW. L & D, Mon.-Sat. 1451 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach. 249-2212. $$ HOT DOG HUT F Best of Jax 2010 winner. All-beef hot dogs, sausages, hamburgers, crab cakes, beer-battered onion rings and French fries. B. L, daily. 1439 Third St. S. 247-8886. $ ICHIBAN F Three dining areas: teppan or hibachi tables (watch a chef prepare your food), a sushi bar and Westernstyle seating offering tempura and teriyaki. FB, Japanese plum wine. L & D, daily. 675 N. Third St. 247-4688. $$ LYNCH’S IRISH PUB Best of Jax 2010 winner. The full-service restaurant offers corned beef and cabbage, Shepherd’s pie and fish-n-chips. 30+ beers on tap. FB. L, Sat. & Sun., D, daily. 514 N. First St. 249-5181. $$ MEZZA LUNA RISTORANTE F A Beaches tradition for 20+ years. Favorites are Szechuan ahi tuna, lasagna Bolognese and wood-fired pizza. Inside or patio. Extensive wine list. CM, FB. D, Mon.-Sat. 110 First St., Neptune Beach. 249-5573. $$$ MOJO KITCHEN BBQ PIT & BLUES BAR F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Traditional slow-cooked Southern barbecue

served in a blues bar atmosphere. Favorites are pulled pork, Texas brisket and slow-cooked ribs. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 1500 Beach Blvd. 247-6636. $$ MONKEY’S UNCLE TAVERN F For 25 years, Monkey’s has served pub grub, burgers, sandwiches, seafood and wings. Dine inside or out on the patio. FB. L & D, daily. 1850 S. Third St. 246-1070. $ promise of benefit NORTH BEACH BISTRO Casual dining with an elegant touch, like slow-cooked veal osso buco; calypso crusted mahi mahi with spiced plantain chips. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 725 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 6, Atlantic Beach. 372-4105. $$$ OCEAN 60 Best of Jax 2010 winner. A prix fixe menu is offered. Continental cuisine, with fresh seafood, nightly specials and a changing seasonal menu. Dine in a formal dining room or casual Martini Room. D, Mon.-Sat. 60 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach. 247-0060. $$$ PACO’S MEXICAN GRILL Serving Baja-style Mexican cuisine, featuring carne asada, tacos, burritos, fish tacos and shrimp burritos. CM, FB. B, L & D, daily. 333 First St. N. 208-5097. $ PARSONS SEAFOOD RESTAURANT F The family-style restaurant has an outdoor patio and an extensive menu, including the mariner’s platter and the Original Dreamboat. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 904 Sixth Ave. S. 249-0608. $$ PHILLY’S FINEST F Authentic Philly-style cheesesteaks are made with imported Amorosa rolls. Hoagies, wings and pizza ... cold beer, too. FB. L & D, daily. 1527 N. Third St. 241-7188. $$ RAGTIME TAVERN SEAFOOD GRILL F The Beaches landmark serves grilled seafood with a Cajun/Creole accent. Hand-crafted cold beer. FB. L & D, daily. 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach. 241-7877. $$ SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK An array of specialty menu items, including signature tuna poke bowl, fresh rolled sushi, Ensenada tacos and local fried shrimp, in a casual, trendy open-air space. FB, TO, CM. L & D, daily. 1018 Third St. N. 372-4456. $$ SNEAKERS SPORTS GRILLE F Best of Jax 2010 winner. 111 Beach Blvd. 482-1000. $$ SUN DOG STEAK & SEAFOOD F Eclectic American fare, art deco décor with an authentic diner feel. FB. L & D, daily; Sun. brunch. 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach. 241-8221. $$ TACOLU BAJA MEXICANA F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Fresh, Baja-style Mexican fare, with a focus on fish tacos and tequila, as well as fried cheese, bangin’ shrimp and verde chicken tacos. L & D, Tue.-Sun. 1183 Beach Blvd. 249-8226. $$ THAI ROOM RESTAURANT F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Dine in an intimate setting as Chef Thepsouvanh prepares Thai cuisine like crispy duck or pan-seared Chilean sea bass. BW. L, Mon.-Fri. D, Mon.-Sat. 1286 S. Third St. 249-8444. $$$ THE WINE BAR The casual neighborhood place has a tapasstyle menu, fire-baked flatbreads and a wine selection. Tue.-Sun. 320 N. First St. 372-0211. $$

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DOWNTOWN

(The Jacksonville Landing venues are at 2 Independent Drive) ADAMS STREET DELI & GRILL The lunch spot serves wraps, including grilled chicken, and salads, including Greek salad. L, Mon.-Fri. 126 W. Adams St. 475-1400. $$ BURRITO GALLERY & BAR F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Southwest cuisine, traditional American salads. Burritos and more burritos. Onsite art gallery. FB. L & D, Mon.-Sat. 21 E. Adams St. 598-2922. $ CAFÉ NOLA AT MOCA JAX On the first floor of Museum of Contemporary Art Jacksonville, Cafe Nola serves shrimp and grits, gourmet sandwiches, fresh fish tacos, homemade desserts. FB. L, Mon.-Fri.; D, Thur. 333 N. Laura St. 366-6911 ext. 231. $4 CHICAGO PIZZA & SPORTS GRILLE F See Baymeadows. The Jacksonville Landing. 354-7747. $$$ CITY HALL PUB On the Trolley route. A sports bar vibe: 16 big-screen HDTVs. Angus burgers, dogs, sandwiches & sides, AYCE wings buffet, soup-n-salad. FB. Free downtown area lunch delivery. L & D, daily. 234 Randolph Blvd. 356-6750. $$ DE REAL TING CAFE F The popular restaurant offers a Caribbean lunch buffet Tue.-Fri. FB. L & D, Tue.-Sun. 128 W. Adams St. 633-9738. $ INDOCHINE Serving Thai and Southeast Asian cuisine in the core of downtown. Signature dishes include favorites like chicken Satay, soft shell crab, and mango and sticky rice for dessert. BW, FB, TO. L, Mon.-Fri., D, Tue.-Sat. 21 E. Adams St. 598-5303. $$ JENKINS QUALITY BARBECUE Family-owned-and-operated. Jenkins offers beef, pork, chicken, homemade desserts. L & D, daily. 830 N. Pearl St. 353-6388. $ KOJA SUSHI F Sushi, Japanese, Asian and Korean cuisine. Indoor and outdoor dining and bar. FB. L & D, daily. The Jacksonville Landing. 350-9911. $$ THE SKYLINE DINING & CONFERENCE CENTER Weekday

June 7-13, 2011 | folio weekly | 37

Folio

FLEMING ISLAND

CHICAGO PIZZA & SPORTS GRILLE F See Baymeadows. 406 Old Hard Road, Ste. 106. 213-7779. $$ GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET F See Riverside. B, L & D, Mon.-Sat.; L, Sun. 1915 East West Pkwy., 541-0009. $ LA NOPALERA F Best of Jax 2010 winner. See Intracoastal. 1571 C.R. 220, Ste. 100. 215-2223. $ MOJO SMOKEHOUSE F Best of Jax 2010 winner. FB. L & D, daily. 1810 Town Ctr. Blvd. 264-0636. $$ WHITEY’S FISH CAMP F The renowned seafood place, family-owned since 1963, specializes in AYCE freshwater catfish. Also steaks, pastas. Outdoor waterfront dining. Come by car, boat or bike. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 2032 C.R. 220. 269-4198. $

INTRACOASTAL

AL’S PIZZA F Best of Jax 2010 winner. See Beaches. 14286 Beach Blvd. (at San Pablo Rd.) 223-0991. $ BRUCCI’S PIZZA, PASTA, PANINIS F Brucci’s offers authentic New York-style pizza, Italian pastas and desserts in a family atmosphere. CM, BW. L & D, daily. 13500 Beach Blvd., Ste. 36. 223-6913. $ CLIFF’S ROCKIN’ BAR-N-GRILL F Cliff’s features 8-ounce burgers, wings, steak, seafood, homemade pizza and daily specials. FB. L & D, daily. Smoking permitted. 3033 Monument Rd., Ste. 2, Cobblestone Plaza. 645-5162. $$ ISTANBUL MEDITERRANEAN & ITALIAN CUISINE F A varied menu offers European cuisine including lamb, beef and chicken dishes, as well as pizza and wraps. BW. L & D, daily. 13170 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 26. 220-9192. $$ JERRY’S SPORTS GRILLE & STEAKHOUSE F The menu includes wings, hamburgers, Ahi tuna and handcut steaks. CM, FB. Daily. 13170 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 22. 220-6766. $ LA NOPALERA F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Family-ownedand-operated, serving authentic Mexican cuisine, like tamales, fajitas, pork tacos, in a casual family atmosphere. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 14333 Beach Blvd. 992-1666. $ MILANO’S RESTAURANT & PIZZERIA Homemade Italian cuisine, breads, pizzas, calzones and specialty dishes. BW, CM. L & D, daily. 12620 Beach Blvd., Ste. 4. 646-9119. $$ TIME OUT SPORTS GRILL F Wings, gourmet pizza, fresh seafood and specialty wraps. FB. D, Mon.-Fri.; L & D, Sat. & Sun. 13799 Beach Blvd., Ste. 5. 223-6999. $$ TKO’S THAI HUT F The menu offers Thai fusion, curry dishes, chef’s specials, steaks, healthy options and sushi. Hookahs are available. Dine inside or on the covered patio. FB. L & D, daily. 13500 Beach Blvd., Ste. 46. 647-7546. $$ ZAITOON MEDITERRANEAN GRILL Traditional Mediterranean family recipes are blended to create Spanish, French, Italian and Middle Eastern inspired dishes. L & D, Tue.-Sun. 13475 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 40, Harbour Village. 221-7066. $$

JULINGTON, NW ST. JOHNS

BLACKSTONE GRILLE The menu blends flavors from a variety of cultures and influences for modern American fusion cuisine, served in a bistro-style setting. FB. L & D, Mon.-Fri., D, Sat.; Sun. brunch. 112 Bartram Oaks Walk, Ste. 102. 287-0766. $$$ BRUCCI’S PIZZA F See Intracoastal. 540 S.R. 13, Ste. 10, Fruit Cove. 287-8317. $$ CHICAGO PIZZA BAKERY & PUB F Transforms from family restaurant to pub serving Chicago-style deep dish pizza. CM, FB. D, Tue.-Fri., L & D, Sat. & Sun. 107 Nature Walk Pkwy., Ste. 101, 230-9700. $$ HAPPY OURS SPORTS GRILLE F Wings, big salads, burgers, wraps and sandwiches. Sports events on HDTVs. CM, FB. 116 Bartram Oaks Walk, Ste. 101. 683-1964. $ PIZZA PALACE F See San Marco. 116 Bartram Oaks Walk. 230-2171. $

MANDARIN

AL’S PIZZA Best of Jax 2010 winner. See Beaches. 11190 San Jose Blvd. 260-4115. $ AW SHUCKS F This seafood place features an oyster bar, steaks, seafood, wings and pasta. Favorites are ahi tuna, shrimp & grits, oysters Rockefeller, pitas and kabobs. Sweet potato puffs are the signature side. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 9743 Old St. Augustine Rd. 240-0368. $$ THE BLUE CRAB CRABHOUSE F A Maryland-style crabhouse featuring fresh blue crabs, garlic crabs, and king,

38 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

snow and Dungeness crab legs. FB, CM. D, Tue.-Sat.; L & D, Sun. 3057 Julington Creek Rd. 260-2722. $$ BROOKLYN PIZZA F The traditional pizzeria serves New York-style pizza, specialty pies, and subs, strombolis and calzones. BW. L & D, daily. 11406 San Jose Blvd. 288-9211. 13820 St. Augustine Rd. 880-0020. $ CASA MARIA F See Springfield. L & D, daily. 14965 Old St. Augustine Rd. 619-8186. $$ CLARK’S FISH CAMP F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Clark’s has steak, ribs, AYCE catfish dinners, 3-pound prime rib. Dine in, out or in a creek-view glass-enclosed room. FB. D, Mon.-Fri.; L & D, Sat. & Sun. 12903 Hood Landing Rd. 268-3474. $$ DON JUAN’S RESTAURANT F Authentic Mexican dishes prepared daily from scratch, served in a casual atmosphere. FB, CM. L & D, daily. 12373 San Jose Blvd. 268-8722. $$ GIGI’S RESTAURANT Breakfast buffet daily, lunch buffet weekdays. The Comedy Zone (Best of Jax 2010 winner) has an appetizer menu. FB. B, L & D, daily. I-295 & San Jose Blvd. (Ramada Inn). 268-8080. $$ (Fri. & Sat. buffet, $$$) HALA CAFE & BAKERY F See Southside. 9735 Old St. Augustine Rd. 288-8890. $$ LET’S NOSH F The authentic Jewish deli offers a full breakfast, lunch, brunch and full-service deli counter. Real New York water bagels, bread baked on site and desserts. CM. B & L, daily. 9850 San Jose Blvd. 683-8346. $ MAMA FU’S ASIAN HOUSE MSG-free pan-Asian cuisine prepared to order in woks using fresh ingredients. Authentic Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Vietnamese and Thai dishes. BW, CM. L & D, daily. 11105 San Jose Blvd. 260-1727. $$ MANDARIN ALE HOUSE A laid-back atmosphere with 30-plus beers on tap. FB. L & D, daily. 11112 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 19. 292-0003. $$ METRO DINER F See San Marco. 12807 San Jose Blvd. 638-6185. $$ NATIVE SUN NATURAL FOODS MARKET F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Organic supermarket with full deli and salad bar serving wraps, quesadillas, chopped salads, vegetarian dishes. Fresh juice and smoothie bar. Indoor and outdoor seating. Mon.-Sat. 10000 San Jose Blvd. 260-6950. $ WHOLE FOODS MARKET F 100+ prepared items at a full-service and self-service hot bar, soup bar, dessert bar. Made-to-order Italian specialties from a brick oven pizza hearth. L & D, daily. 10601 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 22. 288-1100. $$

ORANGE PARK

ARON’S PIZZA F This family-owned restaurant offers eggplant dishes, manicotti and New York-style pizza. BW, CM, TO. L & D daily. 650 Park Ave. 269-1007. $$ BLU TAVERN F This restaurant has an upscale feel with a casual atmosphere. Favorites include bread pudding and Orange Park salad. Blu also serves pasta dishes, burgers, seafood, pork, beef and steaks. CM, FB. L & D, daily; B, Sat. & Sun. only. 1635 Wells Rd. 644-7731. $$ GATOR’S DOCKSIDE F For 18-plus years, the sportsthemed family restaurant has served wings, ribs, entrees, sandwiches. FB. L & D, daily. 9680 Argyle Forest Blvd. 425-6466. $$ THE HILLTOP CLUB She-crab soup, scallops, prime beef, wagyu beef, chicken Florentine and stuffed grouper. Chef Nick’s salmon is a favorite. FB. D, Tue.-Sat. 2030 Wells Rd. 272-5959. $$ POMPEII COAL-FIRED PIZZA F Pizzas are baked in coal-fired ovens. Popular pizzas include Health Choice and Mozzarella. Coal-fired sandwiches and wings, too. BW. L & D, daily. 2134 Park Ave. 264-6116. $$ THE ROADHOUSE F Burgers, wings, deli sandwiches and popular lunches are served. FB. L & D, daily. 231 Blanding Blvd. 264-0611. $ THAI GARDEN F Traditional Thai cuisine made with fresh ingredients, served in a relaxed atmosphere. Curry dishes and specialty selections with authentic Thai flavors. BW. L, Mon.-Fri.; D, nightly. 10 Blanding Blvd., Ste. A. 272-8434. $$

PONTE VEDRA, NE ST. JOHNS AL’S PIZZA F Homemade breads, pizza, white pizza, calzones and Italian entrees. Voted Best Pizza in Jax by Folio Weekly readers from 1996-2010. BW. L & D, daily. 635 A1A. 543-1494. $ AQUA GRILL Upscale cuisine offers fresh seafood, Angus steaks, Maine lobster and vegetarian dishes. Outdoor patio seating. FB. L, Mon.-Sat.; D, nightly. 950 Sawgrass Village Dr. 285-3017. $$$ BRUCCI’S PIZZA F Authentic New York-style pizza, Italian pastas, paninis, desserts. Family atmosphere. CM. L & D, daily. 880 A1A, Ste. 8. 280-7677. $$ CAFFE ANDIAMO Traditional Italian cuisine features fresh seafood, veal, homemade pastas and wood-fired pizza prepared in a copper clad oven. An extensive wine list is

Walter Coker

lunch includes salad bar, hot meals and a carving station. L, Mon.-Fri.; L, Sun. upon request. FB. 50 N. Laura St., Ste. 3550. 791-9797. $$ ZODIAC GRILL F Serving Mediterranean cuisine and American favorites, with a popular lunch buffet. BW. B & L, daily. 120 W. Adams St. 354-8283. $

Corner Bistro and Wine Bar serves American favorites with international flair in an upscale atmosphere, in Tapestry Park on Jacksonville’s Southside.

offered in a cosmopolitan atmosphere. Dine indoors or Out on the terrace. L & D, daily. 500 Sawgrass Village. 280-2299. $$$ LULU’S WATERFRONT GRILLE F On the Intracoastal Waterway, LuLu’s can be reached by car or by boat. Seafood, steaks and pasta dishes with a sophisticated flair. FB. L & D, daily; Sun. brunch. 301 N. Roscoe Blvd. 285-0139. $$ NINETEEN AT TPC SAWGRASS In Sawgrass’ Tournament Players Club, Nineteen features more than 230 wines and freshly prepared American and Continental cuisine, including local seafood, served inside or al fresco on the verandah. L & D, daily. 110 Championship Way. 273-3235. $$$ PUSSER’S BAR & GRILLE F Freshly prepared Caribbean cuisine, including red snapper Ponte Vedra Jamaican grilled pork ribs and barbecued salmon tower. Tropical rum drinks feature Pusser’s Painkiller. FB. L & D, daily. 816 A1A N., Ste. 100. 280-7766. L, $$; D, $$ RESTAURANT MEDURE Chef Matthew Medure offers his eclectic cuisine featuring local and imported seafood with Southern and Asian influences. F/B. D, Mon.-Sat. 818 A1A N. 543-3797. $$$ RUTH’S CHRIS STEAK HOUSE Best of Jax 2010 winner. See San Marco. 8141 A1A. 285-0014. $$$$ 619 OCEAN VIEW Dining with a Mediterranean touch, featuring fresh seafood, steaks and nightly specials. FB, CM. D, Wed.-Sun. 619 Ponte Vedra Blvd., Cabana Beach Club. 285-6198. $$$ URBAN FLATS Ancient world-style flatbread is paired with fresh regional and seasonal ingredients in wraps, flatwiches and entrées, served in a casual, urban atmosphere. An international wine list is offered. FB. L & D, daily. 330 A1A N. 280-5515. $$

RIVERSIDE, 5 POINTS, WESTSIDE AJ’S ON PARK STREET AJ’s is a casual barbecue spot serving smoked St. Louis-style ribs, pulled pork, smoked brisket, seafood and dishes made with a Latin touch. L & D, Mon.-Fri. 630 Park St. 598-0188. $$ AL’S PIZZA F Best of Jax 2010 winner. See Beaches. 1620 Margaret St. 388-8384. $ BAKERY MODERNE F The neighborhood bakery offers classic pastries, artisanal breads, seasonal favorites, all made from scratch, including popular petit fours and custom cakes. B & L, daily. 869 Stockton St., Ste. 6, Riverside. 389-7117. $ CARMINE’S PIE HOUSE The brand-new Italian eatery serves pizza by the slice, gourmet pizzas, appetizers, classic Italian dishes — calzone, stromboli, subs, panini — wings, and microbrews in a casual atmosphere. BW, CM, TO, delivery. 2677 Forbes St. 387-1400. $$ COOL MOOSE F Classic sandwiches, eclectic wraps and desserts. An extensive gourmet coffee menu with Green Mountain coffees and frozen coffee drinks. B & L, daily. Brunch, Sun. 2708 Park St. 381-4242. $ CROSS CREEK See Springfield. 850 S. Lane Ave. 783-9579. $$ EUROPEAN STREET CAFÉ F See San Marco. 2753 Park St. 384-9999. $

GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET F A deli, organic and natural grocery, and juice & smoothie bar offers teas, coffees, gourmet cheeses; natural, organic and raw items. Grab-and-go sandwiches, salads and sides. Craft beers, organic wines. B, L & D, Mon.-Sat.; L, Sun. 2007 Park St. 384-4474. $ HJ’S BAR & GRILL Traditional American fare: burgers, sandwiches, wraps and platters of ribs, shrimp and fish. CM, FB. L & D, Sat. & Sun., D, Mon.-Fri. 8540 Argyle Forest Blvd., Ste. 1. 317-2783. $$ HOVAN MEDITERRANEAN GOURMET F Dine inside or on the patio. Mediterranean entrées include lamb, and beef gyros. L & D, Mon.-Sat. 2005-1 Park St. 381-9394. $ JACKSONS GRILL The locally owned spot’s original menu has fried pickle chips, Rockin’ Ranch burgers, gumbo, sandwiches. BW, TO. B, L & D, daily. 1522 King St. 384-8984. $$ JOHNNY’S DELI & GRILL F A Riverside tradition, serving 60+ fresh deli and grill items, including hot sandwiches. L, Mon.-Fri. 474 Riverside Ave. 356-8055. $ MONROE’S SMOKEHOUSE BBQ Smoked meats include wings, pulled pork, brisket, turkey and ribs. Homemade-style sides include green beans, baked beans, red cole slaw, collards. BW, CM. L & D, Mon.-Sat. 4838 Highway Ave., 389-5551. $$ MOON RIVER PIZZA F Best of Jax 2010 winner. See Amelia Island. 1176 Edgewood Ave. S. 389-4442. $ MOSSFIRE GRILL F Southwestern menu with ahi tuna tacos, goat cheese enchiladas and gouda quesadillas. Dine inside or on the patio. FB. L & D, daily. 1537 Margaret St. 355-4434. $$ O’BROTHERS IRISH PUB F Innovative Irish fare and traditional faves are offered, like lambburger with Stilton crust, Guinness mac & cheese, Shepherd’s pie and fish-nchips — plus 18 beers on tap. L, daily except Mon.; D, daily. CM, FB. 1521 Margaret St. 854-9300. $$ PIZZA PALACE ON THE PARK F See San Marco. Outdoor seating. 920 Margaret St., 5 Points. 598-1212. $$ SAKE HOUSE F Japanese grill and sushi bar features sushi, sashimi, katsu, tempura, hibachi and specialty rolls. CM, BW, sake. L & D, daily. 824 Lomax St. 301-1188. $$ SUMO SUSHI F Authentic Japanese fare, traditional to entrees and sushi rolls, spicy sashimi salad, gyoza (pork dumpling), tobiko (flying fish roe), Rainbow roll (tuna, salmon, yellowtail, Calif. roll). BW, CM. L & D, daily. 2726 Park St. 388-8838. $$ WALKERS This nightspot has a tapas menu plus a wide variety of wines, served in a rustic, intimate atmosphere. BW. Tue.-Sat. 2692 Post St. 894-7465. $ WASABI JAPANESE BUFFET F AYCE buffet. Sushi bar, sashimi, hibachi, teriyaki, tempura, steak, seafood. BW. L & D, daily. 1014 Margaret St., Ste. 1, 5 Points. 301-1199. $$

ST. AUGUSTINE

A1A ALE WORKS F The city’s only brew pub taps seven hand-crafted ales and lagers. A1A specializes in innovative New World cuisine. FB. L & D, daily. 1 King St. 829-2977. $$ AMICI ITALIAN RESTAURANT F A family-owned-andoperated Italian restaurant offers traditional pasta, veal,

The Mustard Seed Cafe

Located inside Nassau Health Foods, The Mustard Seed is Amelia Island’s only organic eatery and juice bar, with an extensive, eclectic menu featuring vegetarian and vegan items. Daily specials include local seafood, free-range chicken and fresh organic produce. Salads, wraps, sandwiches and soups are available — all prepared with Lisa Harter’s impeccable style. Popular items are ginger chicken salad, falafel pitas, black bean burgers and Asian noodles with tuna. Open for breakfast and lunch, 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Mon.-Sat. nassauhealthfoods.net 833 T.J. Courson Road 904-277-3141

Lulu’s at The Thompson House

Lulu’s owners, Brian and Melanie Grimley, offer an innovative lunch menu, including po’boys, salads and seafood “little plates” served in the gardens of the historic Thompson House. Dinner features fresh local seafood (Fernandina shrimp is the focus every Thursday), and nightly specials. An extensive wine list and beer are available. Open for lunch and dinner Tue.-Sat., brunch on Sun. Reservations are recommended. 11 S. Seventh Street 904-432-8394

Plae Restaurant & Lounge

Located in the Spa & Shops at Amelia Island Plantation, PLAE serves bistro style cuisine. The full bar lounge at PLAE has become an instant classic, with artistic décor and live entertainment nightly. Open at 5:30 p.m. for dinner daily; reservations accepted. 80 Amelia Village Cir. 904-277-2132

Cafe Karibo

Homemade sandwiches, salads and soups are served in a relaxed atmosphere in this charming building in the historic district. Delicious fresh fish specials and theme nights (Pad Thai and curry), plus vegetarian dishes, are also featured. Karibrew Brew Pub & Grub — the only one on the island — offers on-site beers and great burgers and sandwiches. 27 N. Third Street 904-277-5269

29 South Eats

This chic, neighborhood bistro has it all — great ambience, fantastic food, an extensive wine list and reasonable prices. The eclectic menu offers traditional world cuisine with a modern whimsical twist and Chef Scotty Schwartz won Best Chef in Folio Weekly’s 2007 Best of Jax readers poll. Open for lunch Tues.-Sat., 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m., for dinner 5:30-9:30 p.m. Mon.-Thur., till 10 p.m. Fri. and Sat. Brunch is 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Sun. 29southrestaurant.com 29 S. Third Street 904-277-7919

Brett’s Waterway Café

Overlooking Fernandina Harbor Marina, Brett’s offers an upscale atmosphere with outstanding food. The extensive luncheon and dinner menus feature daily specials, fresh Florida seafood, chicken and aged beef. Cocktails, beer and wine. Casual resort wear. Open at 11:30 a.m. daily. Fernandina Harbor Marina at the foot of Centre Street 904-261-2660

T-ray’s Burger Station

Moon River Pizza treats customers like family. Cooked in a brick oven, the pizza is custom-made by the slice (or, of course, by the pie). Set up like an Atlanta-style pizza joint, Moon River also offers an eclectic selection of wine and beers. Open for lunch and dinner Mon.-Sat. Dine in or take it with you. 925 S. 14th Street 904-321-3400

T-Ray’s offers a variety of breakfast and lunch items. In addition to an outstanding breakfast menu, you’ll find some of the best burgers you’ve ever put in your mouth. The Burger Station offers a grilled portabello mushroom burger, grilled or fried chicken salad and much more. The spot where locals grab a bite and go! Now serving Beer & Wine. Open Mon.-Fri. 7 a.m.2:30 p.m., Sat. 8 a.m.-1 p.m. Closed Sundays. 202 S. Eighth Street 904-261-6310

The Surf

Jack & Diane’s

Picante Grill Rotisserie Bar

Sliders Seaside Grill

Moon River Pizza

Enjoy a casual beach atmosphere in the full-service restaurant, bar and huge oceanview deck. Extensive menu features delicious steaks, fresh seafood and nightly specials. Also featuring salads, wraps, burgers, seafood baskets and our famous all-you-can-eat wing specials (Wed. & Sun.). Take-out available. Open at 11 a.m. daily for lunch, dinner and late-night menu. Entertainment nightly and 29 TVs throughout. 3199 S. Fletcher Ave. 904-261-5711 Brand-new Picante offers the vibrant flavors of Peru and Latin America, served in a contemporary atmosphere. The menu includes authentic Peruvian cebiche and home-style empanadas. An extensive selection of boutique South American wines and craft brew beers are offered. A children’s menu and take-out are available. Open for breakfast, lunch and dinner daily. 464073 S.R. 200, Ste. 2, Yulee 904-310-9222

The locals’ favorite hangout! Dine inside or on the patio of this cozy, renovated 1887 shotgun home in historic downtown Fernandina. From the crab & shrimp omelet to the steak & tomato pie, “The tastiest spot on Centre” offers food with attitude and unexpected flair. Live music elevates your dining experience to a new level. Come for breakfast, stay for dinner! You’ll love every bite! 708 Centre Street 904-321-1444

Oceanfront dining at its finest. Award-winning crab cakes, fresh daily seafood specials and homemade desserts. Sliders has Amelia Island’s only waterfront Tiki Bar, as well as a children’s playground and live music every weekend. The dining experience is complete with brand-new second-story banquet facilities, bar and verandah. Open at 11 a.m. daily, with happy hour from 4-7 p.m. Mon.-Fri. Make Sliders Seaside Grill your place to be for friends and family, entertainment and the best food on the East Coast. Call for your next special event. 1998 S. Fletcher Ave. 904-277-6652

Amelia Island is 13 miles of unspoiled beaches, quaint shops, antique treasures and superb dining in a 50-block historic district less than one hour north of Jacksonville June 7-13, 2011 | folio weekly | 39

steak and seafood dishes. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 1915B A1A S., St. Augustine Beach. 461-0102. $$ ANN O’MALLEY’S F Fresh handmade sandwiches, soups, salads and perfectly poured Guinness. Favorites include Reubens and chicken salad. CM, BW, Irish beers on tap. L & D, daily. 23 Orange St. 825-4040. $$ BARNACLE BILL’S BEACHSIDE, BARNACLE BILL’S DOWNTOWN F For 30 years, these family restaurants have served seafood, oysters, gator tail, steak, and popular fried shrimp. FB, CM, TO. Downtown location, L & D daily; beach location, D nightly. 451 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach, 471-2434. 14 Castillo Drive, 824-3663. $$ BEACH STREET PIZZA New York and Chicago style pizzas, calzones and homemade pasta dishes, all made from fresh ingredients., served in a beach-theme atmosphere. CM. L & D, Tue.-Sun. 4171 A1A S. 461-0910. $$ THE BLACK MOLLY BAR & GRILL Brand-new Black Molly Grill serves fresh, local seafood, steaks and pasta dishes in a casual atmosphere. FB, CM. L & D daily. 504 Geoffrey St., Cobblestone Plaza. 547-2723. $$ BORRILLO’S PIZZA & SUBS F Specialty pizzas are Borrillo’s Supreme (extra cheese, pepperoni, sausage), white and vegetarian pizzas. Subs and pasta dinners. L & D, daily. 88 San Marco Ave. 829-1133. $ CAFÉ ATLANTICO Traditional and new Italian dishes served in an intimate space. Master Chef Paolo Pece prepares risotto alla pescatora, with shrimp, scallops and seasonal shellfish, in a parmesan cheese basket. BW. D, nightly. 647 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach. 471-7332. $$$ CAFÉ ELEVEN F Eclectic cuisine like feta spinach egg croissant, apple turkey sandwich, pear-berry salad. Daily chef creations. BW. B, L & D, daily. 501 A1A Beach Blvd. 460-9311. B, $; L & D, $$ CAP’S ON THE WATER F This Vilano Beach mainstay offers coastal cuisine — tapas platters, cioppino, fresh local shrimp, raw oyster bar — indoors or on an oak-shaded deck. Boat access. FB. L, Fri.-Sun., D, nightly. 4325 Myrtle St., Vilano Beach. 824-8794. $$ CARMELO’S PIZZERIA F Authentic New York style brickoven-baked pizza, fresh baked sub rolls, Boars Head meats and cheeses, fresh salads, calzones, strombolis and sliced pizza specials. BW. L & D, daily. 146 King St. 494-6658. $$ CELLAR 6 ART GALLERY & WINE BAR Wolfgang Puck coffees, handmade desserts and light bistro-style fare amid local art. BW. Mon.-Sat. 6 Aviles St. 827-9055. $$ CREEKSIDE DINERY Creekside serves beef, chicken and seafood, with an emphasis on low-country cooking. Outdoor deck with a fire pit. FB. D, nightly. 160 Nix Boatyard Rd. 829-6113. $$ THE FLORIDIAN The downtown restaurant serves innovative Southern fare, made with local farmers’ local food. Signature items: fried green tomato bruschetta, ’N’grits with shrimp, fish or tofu. L & D, Wed.-Mon. 39 Cordova St. 829-0655. $$ GYPSY CAB COMPANY F Best of Jax 2010 winner. International menu features large portions, reasonable prices. FB. L & D, daily. 828 Anastasia Blvd. 824-8244. $$ HARRY’S SEAFOOD BAR & GRILLE F In a historic, twostory house, the New Orleans-style eatery has fresh seafood, steaks, jambalaya, etouffée and shrimp. FB. L & D, daily. 46 Avenida Menendez. 824-7765. $$ KINGFISH GRILL At Vilano Bridge’s west end, Kingfish Grill offers casual waterside dining indoors and on the deck, featuring fresh daily catch, house specialties and sushi. FB, CM. L & D, daily. 252 Yacht Club Drive. 824-2111. $$ KINGS HEAD BRITISH PUB F Authentic Brit pub serves fish & chips, Cornish pastie and steak & kidney pie. Tap beers are Guinness, Newcastle and Bass. BW. L & D, Wed.-Sun. 6460 U.S. 1 (4 miles N. of St. Augustine Airport.) 823-9787. $$ THE MANATEE CAFÉ F Serving healthful cuisine using organically grown fruits, vegetables, grains and legumes. B & L, daily. 525 S.R. 16, Ste. 106, Westgate Plaza. 826-0210. $ MANGO MANGO’S BEACHSIDE BAR & GRILL F Caribbean kitchen has comfort food with a tropical twist: coconut shrimp and fried plantains. BW, CM. Outdoor dining. 700 A1A Beach Blvd., (A Street access) St. Augustine Beach. 461-1077. $$ MILL TOP TAVERN F A St. Auggie institution housed in an 1884 building, serving nachos, soups, sandwiches and daily specials. Dine inside or on open-air decks. At the big mill wheel. FB. L & D, daily. 19 1/2 St. George St. 829-2329. $$ OASIS RESTAURANT & DECK F Just a block from the ocean, with a tropical atmosphere and open-air deck. Steamed oysters, crab legs, burgers. CM, FB. B, L & D, daily. 4000 A1A & Ocean Trace Rd., St. Augustine Beach. 471-3424. $ PURPLE OLIVE INTERNATIONAL BISTRO F Familyowned-and-operated, offering specials, fresh artisan breads. Soups, salad dressings and desserts made from scratch. BW. D, Tue.-Sat. 4255 A1A S., Ste. 6, St. Augustine Beach. 461-1250. $$ RAINTREE The restaurant, in a Victorian home, offers a menu with contemporary and traditional international influences. Extensive wine list. FB. D, daily. 102 San Marco Ave. 824-7211. $$$ THE REEF RESTAURANT Casual oceanfront restaurant has

40 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

an ocean view from every table. Fresh local seafood, steak, pasta dishes and daily chef specials. Outdoor dining. FB, CM, TO. L & D daily. 4100 Coastal Hwy. A1A, Vilano Beach. 824-8008. $$ SCARLETT O’HARA’S Best of Jax 2010 winner. Serving Southern fare, barbecue and seafood. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 70 Hypolita St. 824-6535. $$ SOUTH BEACH GRILL Located off A1A, south of the S.R. 206 bridge, this two-story beachy destination offers casual oceanfront dining and fresh local seafood. Dine indoors or out on a beachfront deck. FB. B, L & D daily. 45 Cubbedge Road, Crescent Beach. 471-8700. $ SUNSET GRILLE Casual Key West style and a seafood-heavy menu — it’s a consistent Great Chowder Debate winner. Specialties include baby back ribs, lobster ravioli, coconut shrimp and datil pepper wings with bleu cheese dressing. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 421 A1A Beach Blvd. 471-5555. $$$ ZHANRAS F Art-themed tapas-style place has small plate items in a casual, contemporary space. Entrée portions available. CM, FB. D, daily; Sun. brunch. 108 Anastasia Blvd. 823-3367. $$

ST. JOHNS TOWN CENTER, TINSELTOWN BLACKFINN AMERICAN GRILLE With four dining rooms, BlackFinn offers classic American fare: beef, seafood, pasta, chicken and flatbread sandwiches. Dine indoors or on the patio. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 4840 Big Island Dr. 345-3466. $$ FIVE GUYS BURGERS & FRIES Best of Jax 2010 winner. 13249 City Square Dr. 751-9711. 9039 Southside Blvd., 538-9100. 4413 Town Center Pkwy., Ste. 401. 996-6900. fiveguys.com $ THE GRAPE BISTRO & WINE BAR F More than 145 wines, along with a tapas menu of gourmet fare to pair with the wine list. A wide selection of beer is also served. L & D, daily. 10281 Midtown Parkway, Ste. 119. 642-7111. $$ ISLAND GIRL WINE & CIGAR BAR F Upscale tropical vibe. Walk-in humidor, pairing apps and desserts with 25 wines, ports by the glass. 220+ wines by the bottle; draft, bottled beer. L & D, daily. 7860 Gate Pkwy., Ste. 115. 854-6060. $$ JOHNNY ANGELS F The menu reflects its ’50s-style décor, including Blueberry Hill pancakes, Fats Domino omelet, Elvis special combo platter. Shakes, malts. B, L & D, daily. 3546 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., Ste. 120. 997-9850. $ LIBRETTO’S PIZZERIA & ITALIAN KITCHEN F Authentic NYC pizzeria serves Big Apple crust, cheese and sauce, along with third-generation family-style Italian classics, fresh-from-the-oven calzones, and desserts in a casual, comfy setting. L & D, daily. 4880 Big Island Dr., Ste. 1. 4028888. $$ LIME LEAF F Authentic Thai cuisine: fresh papaya salad, pad Thai, mango sweet rice. BW. L, Mon.-Fri.; D, Mon.-Sat. 9822 Tapestry Park Cir., Stes. 108 & 109. 645-8568. $$ MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Tossed spring water dough, lean meats, veggies and vegetarian choices make up specialty pizzas, hoagies and calzones. FB. L & D, daily. 9734 Deer Lake Court (at Tinseltown). 997-1955. $ mellowmushroom.com MITCHELL’S FISH MARKET F Featuring seafood, an ever-changing menu of more than 180 items includes cedarroasted Atlantic salmon and seared salt-and-pepper tuna. FB, CM. L & D, daily. 5205 Big Island Dr., St. Johns Town Ctr. 645-3474. $$$ OTAKI JAPANESE STEAKHOUSE F Family-owned steakhouse has an open sushi bar, hibachi grill tables and an open kitchen. Dine indoor or out. FB, CM, TO. L, Mon.-Fri.; D, nightly. 7860 Gate Parkway, Stes. 119-122. 854-0485. $$$ POMPEII COAL-FIRED PIZZA F See Orange Park. 7860 Gate Parkway. 253-3314. $$ RENNA’S PIZZA F Renna’s serves up New York-style pizza, calzones, subs and lasagna made from authentic Italian recipes. Delivery, CM, BW. 4624 Town Crossing Dr., Ste. 125, St. Johns Town Center. 565-1299. rennaspizza.com $$ SEVEN BRIDGES GRILLE & BREWERY F Innovative menu of fresh local grilled seafood, sesame tuna, grouper Oscar, chicken, steak and pizza. Microbrewed ales and lagers. FB. L & D, daily. 9735 Gate Pkwy. N. 997-1999. $$ SOUTHSIDE ALE HOUSE F Steaks, fresh seafood, sandwiches and desserts. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 9711 Deer Lake Court. 565-2882. $$ STEAMERS CAFE F Steamers’ menu has all-natural and organic items, including wraps, sandwiches, subs, soups, steamer bowls, smoothies and fresh juices. Daily lunch specials. L & D, Mon.-Sat. 4320 Deerwood Lake Parkway, Ste. 106. 646-4527. $ SUITE The St. Johns Town Center premium lounge and restaurant offers chef-driven small plates and an extensive list of specialty cocktails, served in a sophisticated atmosphere. FB. D & late-nite, nightly. 4880 Big Island Dr., Ste. 1. 493-9305. $$ TAVERNA YAMAS This Greek restaurant serves char-broiled

kabobs, seafood and traditional Greek wines and desserts. FB. L & D daily. 9753 Deer Lake Court. 854-0426. $$ URBAN FLATS F See Ponte Vedra. CM. FB. L & D, daily. 9726 Touchton Road. 642-1488. $$ WASABI JAPANESE STEAKHOUSE & SUSHI BAR F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Authentic Japanese cuisine, teppanyaki shows and a full sushi menu. CM. L & D, daily. 10206 River Coast Dr. 997-6528. $$ WHISKY RIVER F Best of Jax 2010 winner. At St. Johns Town Center’s Plaza, Whisky River features wings, pizza, wraps, sandwiches and burgers served in a lively car racingthemed atmosphere (Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s the owner). FB. CM. L & D, daily. 4850 Big Island Drive. 645-5571. $$ WILD WING CAFÉ F Serving up 33 flavors of wings, as well as soups, sandwiches, wraps, ribs, platters and burgers. FB. 4555 Southside Blvd. 998-WING (9464). $$ YUMMY SUSHI F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Teriyaki, tempura, hibachi-style dinners, sushi & sashimi. Sushi lunch roll special. BW, sake. L & D, daily. 4372 Southside Blvd. 998-8806. $$

SAN JOSE

ATHENS CAFÉ F Serving authentic Greek cuisine: lamb, seafood, veal and pasta dishes. BW. L & D, daily. 6271 St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 7. 733-1199. $$ CRUISERS GRILL F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Burgers, sandwiches, nachos, quesadillas and cheese fries. 5613 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 1. 737-2874. $ DICK’S WINGS F Best of Jax 2010 winner. NASCARthemed family style sports place serves wings, buffalo tenders, burgers and chicken sandwiches. CM. BW. L & D, daily. 1610 University Blvd. W. 448-2110. dickswingsandgrill. com $ MOJO BAR-B-QUE F Best of Jax 2010 winner. The Southern Blues kitchen serves pulled pork, brisket and North Carolina-style barbecue. TO, BW. L & D, daily. 1607 University Blvd. W. 732-7200. $$

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK

BASIL THAI & SUSHI F Offering Thai cuisine, including pad Thai and curry dishes, and sushi in a relaxing atmosphere. L & D, Mon.-Sat. BW. 1004 Hendricks Ave. 674-0190. $$ b.b.’s F A bistro menu is served in an upscale atmosphere, featuring almond-crusted calamari, tuna tartare and wild mushroom pizza. FB. L & D, Mon.-Fri.; brunch & D, Sat. 1019 Hendricks Ave. 306-0100. $$$ BISTRO AIX F Best of Jax 2010 winner. French, Mediterranean-inspired fare, award-winning wines, woodfired pizzas, house-made pastas, steaks, seafood. Indoor, outdoor dining. FB. L, Mon.-Fri.; D, nightly. 1440 San Marco Blvd. 398-1949. $$$ EUROPEAN STREET F Big sandwiches, soups, desserts and more than 100 bottled and on-tap beers. BW. L & D, daily. 1704 San Marco Blvd. 398-9500. $ THE GROTTO F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Wine by the glass. Tapas-style menu offers a cheese plate, empanadas bruschetta, chocolate fondue. BW. 2012 San Marco Blvd. 398-0726. $$ HAVANA-JAX CAFÉ/CUBA LIBRE BAR LOUNGE F Authentic Latin American fine dining: picadillo, ropa vieja, churrasco tenderloin steak, Cuban sandwiches. L & D, Mon.-Sat. CM, FB. 2578 Atlantic Blvd. 399-0609. $ KIRIN SUSHI F On San Marco Square. All-new sushi menu. Dine under neon in a cool atmosphere. CM, BW. L & D, daily. 1950 San Marco Blvd., Ste. 1. 399-3305. $$. LAYLA’S OF SAN MARCO Fine dining in the heart of San Marco. Traditional Middle Eastern cuisine, served inside or outside on the hookah and cigar patio. BW. L & D, Mon.Sat.; D, Sun. 2016 Hendricks Ave. 398-4610. $$ MATTHEW’S Chef’s tasting menu or seasonal à la carte menu featuring an eclectic mix of Mediterranean ingredients. Dress is business casual, jackets optional. FB. D, Mon.-Sat. 2107 Hendricks Ave. 396-9922. $$$$ METRO DINER F Best of Jax 2010 winner. Historic 1930s diner offers award-winning breakfast and lunch. Fresh seafood and Southern cooking. Bring your own wine. B & L, daily. 3302 Hendricks Ave. 398-3701. $$ PIZZA PALACE F It’s all homemade from Mama’s award-winning recipes: spinach pizza and chicken-spinach calzones. BW. L & D, daily. 1959 San Marco Blvd. 399-8815. $$ PULP F The juice bar offers fresh juices, froyo (frozen yogurt), teas, coffees made one cup at a time, along with 30 kinds of smoothies. B, L & D, daily. 1962 San Marco Blvd. 396-9222. $ RUTH’S CHRIS STEAK HOUSE A Best of Jax 2010 winner. Midwestern prime beef, fresh seafood in an upscale atmosphere. FB. D, daily. 1201 Riverplace Blvd. 396-6200. $$$$ SAKE HOUSE See Riverside. 1478 Riverplace Blvd. 306-2188. $$

SAN MARCO DELI F The independently owned & operated classic diner serves grilled fish, turkey burgers and lunch meats roasted daily in-house. Vegetarian options, including tempeh, too. Mon.-Sat. 1965 San Marco Blvd. 399-1306. $ TAVERNA Tapas, small-plate items, Neapolitan-style wood-fired pizzas and entrées are served in a rustic yet upscale interior. BW, TO. L & D, Tue.-Sat. 1986 San Marco Blvd. 398-3005. $$$

SOUTHSIDE

BISTRO 41° F Casual dining features fresh, homemade breakfast and lunch dishes in a relaxing atmosphere. TO. B & L, Mon.-Fri. 3563 Philips Hwy., Ste. 104. 446-9738. $ BLUE BAMBOO Contemporary Asian-inspired cuisine includes rice-flour calamari, seared Ahi tuna, pad Thai. Street eats: barbecue duck, wonton crisps. BW. L, Mon.-Fri.; D, Mon.-Sat. 3820 Southside Blvd. 646-1478. $$ BOMBA’S SOUTHERN HOME COOKING F The neighborhood comfort spot offers Southern homestyle fare, featuring fresh veggies. Outside dining is available. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 8560 Beach Blvd. 997-2291. $$ BUCA DI BEPPO Italian dishes served family-style in an eclectic, vintage setting. Half-pound meatballs are a specialty. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 10334 Southside Blvd. 363-9090. $$$ CORNER BISTRO & WINE BAR F Casual fine dining. The menu blends modern American favorites served with international flair. The Fresh Bar offers fine wine, cocktails, martinis. FB. L & D, Tue.-Sun. 9823 Tapestry Park Circle, Ste. 1. 619-1931. $$$ EL POTRO F Family-friendly, casual, El Potro cooks it fresh, made-to-order — fast, hot, simple. Daily specials and buffet at most locations. BW. L & D, daily. 5871 University Blvd. W., 733-0844. 11380 Beach Blvd., 564-9977. elpotrorestaurant.com $ EUROPEAN STREET F See San Marco. 5500 Beach Blvd. 398-1717. $ HALA CAFE & BAKERY F A local institution since 1975 serves house-baked pita bread, kabobs, falafel and daily lunch buffet. Best of Jax 2010 winner. TO, BW. L & D, Mon.Sat. 4323 University Blvd. S. 733-5141. $$ LA NOPALERA F Best of Jax 2010 winner. See Intracoastal. 8206 Philips Hwy. 732-9433. $ SPECKLED HEN TAVERN & GRILLE F This stylish yet simple gastropub features Southern-style cuisine made with a modern twist: Dishes are paired with international wines and beers, including a large selection of craft and IPA brews. FB. L & D, daily. 9475 Philips Hwy., Ste. 16. 538-0811. $$ SUNSET 30 TAVERN & GRILL F Located inside the new entertainment complex Latitude 30, Sunset 30 serves familiar favorites, including seafood, steaks, sandwiches, burgers, chicken, pasta and pizza. Dine inside or on the patio. FB. L & D, daily. 10370 Philips Hwy. 365-5555. $$ TOMMY’S BRICK OVEN PIZZA F Premium New York-style pizza from a brick-oven — the area’s original gluten-free pizzeria. Plus calzones, soups and salads; Thumann’s noMSG meats, Grande cheeses and Boylan soda. BW. L & D, Mon.-Sat. 4160 Southside Blvd., Ste. 2. 565-1999. $$ WASABI JAPANESE BUFFET F Best of Jax 2010 winner. AYCE sushi and two teppanyaki grill items are included in buffet price. FB. L & D, daily. 9041 Southside Blvd., Ste. 138C. 363-9888. $$

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

BOSTON’S RESTAURANT & SPORTSBAR F A full menu of sportsbar faves; pizzas till 2 a.m. Dine inside or on the patio. FB, TO. L & D, daily. 13070 City Station Dr., River City Marketplace. 751-7499. $$ CASA MARIA F The family-owned restaurant serves authentic Mexican fare, including fajitas and seafood. The specialty is tacos de azada. CM, FB. L & D, daily. 12961 N. Main St., Ste. 104. 757-6411. $$ MILLHOUSE STEAKHOUSE F A locally-owned-andoperated steakhouse with choice steaks from the signature broiler, and seafood, pasta, Millhouse gorgonzola, homemade desserts. CM, FB. D, nightly. 1341 Airport Rd. 741-8722. $$ SALSARITA’S FRESH CANTINA F Southwest cuisine made from scratch, served in a family atmosphere. CM, BW. L & D, daily. 840 Nautica Dr., Ste. 131, River City Marketplace. 696-4001. $ THREE LAYERS CAFE F Lunch, bagels, desserts, and the adjacent Cellar serves fine wines. Inside and courtyard dining. BW. B, L & D, daily. 1602 Walnut St., Springfield. 355-9791. $ UPTOWN MARKET F Located in the 1300 Building at the corner of Third & Main, Uptown serves fresh fare made with the same élan that rules Burrito Gallery. Innovative breakfast, lunch and deli selections. BW, TO. 1303 Main St. N. 355-0734. $$

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Fake O, Real Consequences

Ellenbeth Wachs, 48, was arrested in Lakeland, Fla., in May on a complaint that she “simulated” a sex act in front of a minor. According to reports, Wachs, after receiving medication for her multiple sclerosis, was awakened at 8:30 a.m. by her 10-year-old neighbor boy’s clamorous basketball game, near Wachs’ window. After unsuccessfully beseeching the boy for quiet, Wachs — hoping perhaps to make a point about noisy neighbors — began moaning out the window (while remaining out of sight), “Oh, John! Oh! John!” over and over at increased shrillness as if in the throes of orgasm. The basketball-playing stopped, but the incident was not a teaching moment. The boy’s father, Otto Lehman, called police and filed for an order of protection against Wachs.

Compelling Explanations

Dalia Dippolito, 30, of Boynton Beach, Fla., was convicted in May of hiring a hit man to kill her husband, but not before offering an ultramodern defense: Her lawyer told the jury it was all a fake scheme to pitch a reality-TV show about one spouse’s ordering a hit on the other (and that her husband, Michael, had come up with the idea). As Dippolito’s plan unfolded, her boyfriend alerted police, who set up a sting and witnessed Dippolito dictating exactly what she wanted done. In fact, the sting itself was captured on video for the “Cops” TV show. Michael denied any involvement, and the jury seemed to not give her story any credence. “Wrong” Impressions: The Sergeants Benevolent Association, fighting back in April against corruption charges (that its NYPD officers often “fix” traffic tickets for celebrities, high officials and selected “friends”) claimed in a recorded message reported in The New York Times that such fixes are merely “courtesy,” not corruption. A 20-year-old Jersey City, N.J., gym member claimed “criminal sexual contact” in March, acknowledging that while she had given a male club therapist permission to massage her breasts and buttocks, she’d been under the impression he was gay. When another gym member told her the therapist had a girlfriend, she called the cops. Quite a Disease, That Lyme: Marilyn Michose, 46, was referred for medical evaluation in May after being spotted roaming the lobby of New York City’s Waldorf-Astoria Hotel, wearing neon-pink panties over her street clothes, with a .25-caliber Beretta visible in her jacket pocket, and speaking gibberish. According to Michose’s mother, Marilyn overmedicated for her Lyme disease. A restraining order, to keep away from Sarah Palin and her family, was extended in May against Shawn Christy, 19, of McAdoo, Pa., by a magistrate in Anchorage, Alaska. Christy admitted to traveling to Alaska to meet Palin, making several phone calls to her, and to once threatening to sexually assault her. According to a 2009 psychiatric evaluation ordered by the Secret Service, Christy appeared to suffer from “latent onset” Lyme disease.

Ironies

Erie County, N.Y., jail officials suspended guards Lawrence Mule, a 26-year veteran, and James Conlin, a 29-year veteran, after they scuffled at the County Correctional Facility on April 21, reportedly over a bag of chips. An

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inmate had to break up the fight. An anti-terrorism drill scheduled for Pottawattamie County, Iowa, in March, to practice community co-ordination after an attack by a hypothetical white supremacist group angry about illegal immigration, was canceled. The sheriff said callers claiming to be white supremacists were mad at being picked on as “terrorists” and threatened a school in Treynor, Iowa, with an attack closely resembling the kind of imagined attack that would’ve preceded the simulated drill.

I Demand My Rights!

Charles Wilhite’s lawyer expressed shock in a formal motion before the court after his client’s murder trial in Springfield, Mass., in April (in which Wilhite was convicted). How could it be, he asked the judge, that despite having to evaluate 19 witnesses and examine 55 pieces of evidence, the jury could so quickly have decided (three hours total) Wilhite and his partner Angel Hernandez were guilty? The lawyer insinuated the jury had been inattentive or biased, but didn’t mention possibilityplease call your advertising representative For the questions, that Wilhite and Hernandez were so obviously FAX YOUR PROOF IF POSSIBLE AT 268-3655 guilty, no more time was needed.

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Signs of the Times

“Dog Stylist” Dara Foster (“I show people how to live with their dogs in a stylish way”) told a TV audience recently that some dog owners dress their pooches in “ ’80s-inspired punk,” “giving way to a grunge movement in dog fashion — I swear to God.” The ubiquitous TV guest and apparel designer estimates that since Americans already spend $47 billion a year on pets, they need more than ever to know what’s hot — like fluorescent styling gel, precooked dog meals, owners getting matching tattoos with their dogs, and a recently spotted synthetic mullet wig for dogs.

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FolioWeekly

Putting Fannies in the Pews: Two Strategies

To hype attendance for Easter services this year, Lindenwald Baptist Church in Hamilton, Ohio, raffled off $1,000 on Easter Sunday. As a result, attendance more than doubled, to 1,137 (including 1,135 raffle losers). A month earlier, Pastor John Goodman of the Houston Unity Baptist Church tried another tack, calling on parishioners to cede their income-tax refunds to the church and warning that anyone who failed to come to the aid of the church is a “devil” and could be refused communion.

Least Competent Criminals

People Who Didn’t Think It Through: Joseph Price, 61, left the PNC Bank in Okeechobee, Fla., empty-handed on May 6 despite having passed the teller a note demanding a “sack full of cash.” However, he hadn’t brought a sack with him, and the teller said she didn’t have one, either. He was arrested seven minutes after leaving the bank. Joseph Brice, 21, of Clarkston, Wash., was indicted in May on one count of having manufactured a bomb in 2010. Brice inadvertently called attention to himself by ordering his bomb components under the name of (Oklahoma City bomber) “Timothy McVeigh.” Chuck Shepherd WeirdNews@earthlink.net

June 7-13, 2011 | folio weekly | 41

FreeWill Astrology ARIES (March 21-April 19): You have poetic license and astrological permission to be extra cute in the week ahead. I mean you have a divine mandate to exceed the usual levels of being adorable, charming and delectable. There’s a potential problem with that, though: Trying to be cute doesn’t usually result in becoming cuter; often it leads to being smarmy and pretentious. So how do you take advantage of the cosmic imperative to be wildly, extravagantly, sublimely cute without getting all selfconscious? That’s your riddle of the week.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): According to research published in The Journal of Personality (tinyurl.com/ NoToSex), many college students prefer ego strokes to sex. Given the choice between making love with a desirable partner and receiving a nice big compliment, a majority opted for the latter. In the near future, it’s important to not act like one of these self-esteem-starved wimps. You need the emotional and physical catharsis that can come from erotic union and other sources of pleasurable intensity far more than you need to have your pride propped up.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): It’d be an excellent week to declare war on everything that wastes your time. Well, maybe “declaring war” isn’t the right spirit to adopt; after all, we don’t want you to go around all enraged and hostile. How about we say it this way: It’s prime time to ingeniously and relentlessly elude all activities, invitations, temptations, trains of thought and habits that offer nothing in return for the precious energy you give them. Of course, this is always a worthy project, but it so happens you’re apt to achieve far more progress than usual if you do it now.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): An uncanny stretching sensation will soon be upon you if it’s not already. Whether prepared or not, you’ll be asked, prodded and maybe even compelled to expand. It could feel stressful or exhilarating, or both. And it may force you to rethink your fascination with anyone or anything you love to hate. For best results, I suggest you don’t resist the elongation and enlargement. In fact, it’d be a very good idea to cooperate. As the odd magic unfolds, it will increase your capacity for taking advantage of paradox. It may also give you a surprising power to harness the energy released by the friction between oppositional forces.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Primatologist Jane Goodall, who lived for years among chimpanzees in Tanzania, is one of the world’s top experts on the creatures. Can you guess what her favorite toy was when she was young? A stuffed monkey! There were foreshadowings like that in your childhood or adolescence, right? Signs of the magic you’d eventually seek to ripen? Seeds of destiny just begun to sprout? Now’s a good time to reflect on those early hints. You benefit from updating your understanding © 2011 of and commitment to the capacities they revealed.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): You’re in a phase of your astrological cycle when you’re likely to be as attractive, endearing and in demand as it’s possible for you to be. I’m not making any absurdly extravagant claims here — not implying you’ll be as charismatic as a rock star and as lovable as a kitten — but you’ll be pushing the limits of your innate allure. I bet your physical appearance will be extra appealing, and you’ll have an instinct for highlighting the most winsome aspects of your personality. To help you take advantage of the potential available, please add this word to your vocabulary: “concupiscible,” which means “worthy of being desired.”

FolioWeekly

CANCER (June 21-July 22): After all these years, the American presidential election of 2000 still makes me cringe. Because of the archaic laws governing the process, the candidate who “lost” the election actually got 543,895 more votes than the guy who “won.” How could anyone in good conscience, even those who supported the lesspopular “winner,” have sanctioned such a result? It was perverse, pathological, crazy-making. I’d say the same thing if the roles had been reversed, and Gore had become president with a half-million fewer votes than Bush. You mustn’t let something like this anomaly happen in your life in the weeks ahead. It’s crucial that every winner is the one who deserves it. Don’t sacrifice what’s right to serve corrupt protocol or outmoded conventions. LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): I dreamed you’d been tending an unusual garden for months. Your crops weren’t herbs, flowers or vegetables, but miniature volcanoes. Each was now ripe and rose about waist-high. They erupted with a steady flow of liquid blue fire you were ladling into large, gold, Grail-like cups. Apparently this stuff was safe to drink and profoundly energizing. You sipped some of the potion and distributed the rest to a large gathering of enthusiastic people who’d come to imbibe the tasty medicine. The mood was festive, and you were radiant. My dream is a good metaphor for your life in the immediate future. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Darryl Dawkins played professional basketball from 1975-’96. One of the sport’s more colorful personalities, he said he lived part-time on the planet Lovetron, where he perfected his interplanetary funkmanship. He also liked to give names to his slam dunks. The “Turbo Sexophonic Delight” was a favorite, but the best was his “Chocolate-Thunder-Flying, Teeth-Shaking, Glass-Breaking, Rump-Roasting, BunToasting, Wham-Bam-I-Am Jam.” I encourage you to try some Dawkins-like behavior in your chosen field. Give a name to your signature move or special play. With playful flair, let people know how much you love what you do and how good you are at it. 42 | FOLIO WEEKLY | JUNE 7-13, 2011

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Nicolas Cage is a Capricorn. While performing his film roles, he often loses his composure. Of course, the crazy things he does as an actor aren’t real and don’t lead to dire consequences in his actual life, but they afford him a great deal of emotional release. Let’s hypothesize that, like Cage, you could benefit from expressing the hell out of yourself without causing any mayhem. Is there a cork-lined sanctuary where you could go and safely unveil explosions of extreme emotions? Or some equivalent? For inspiration, check this Youtube compendium of Cage uncaged: bit.ly/CageUncaged. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): My divinations suggest you’d be wise to assign yourself an errand in the wilderness. The precise nature of the errand has not been revealed to me, but I suspect it involves you going to an untamed place whose provocative magic will tangibly alter your consciousness, awakening you to some truth about your destiny you’ve been unable to decipher. I also believe your task is more likely to succeed if you create a small, whimsical shrine there in your ad hoc sanctuary. PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Do you have any idea of how many of your diapers your mother changed when you were a baby? It was almost certainly more than 1,000. Have you ever calculated how many meals she prepared for you? That number probably exceeds 10,000. While we’re on the subject, do you remember who taught you to read and write? Can you visualize the face of the first person besides your parents who made you feel interesting or well-loved or real? I encourage you to follow this line of thought as far as you can. It’s a perfect time, astrologically speaking, to visualize memories of specific times you’ve been well-cared-for and thoroughly blessed. Rob Brezsny freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com

LET’S FLY AWAY TOGETHER I Saw U at Jacksonville International Airport saying what appeared to be a final farewell to a guy, sad tears. You glanced my way – I’ll never forget your look. You: slender, dark hair, red lipstick. Me: Tall, dark & handsome. We belong together. When: March 22, 2011. Where: JIA. #1130-0607

Your attire consisted of an eye-catching black-and-white striped dress with an aesthetically pleasing smile! The orchestra was excellent but ended too quickly. Wish we could have been together longer. Cheerio. When: May 8, 2011. Where: Jacksonville Beach Pavilion Lawn. #1119-0517

BELK’S MEMORIAL DAY SHOE SALE! It was Memorial Day and you and your daughter(?) were in Belk’s shopping for shoes. You didn’t buy any... but I did. You said I should exchange the tags and then everything I wanted would be on sale. Wish we had exchanged phone numbers instead of tags. When: May 30, 2011. Where: Belk’s Regency. #1129-0607

MARCH OF DIMES WALK Me: Standing at the Publix tent in my tan hat. You: wearing a red shirt walking for Wells Fargo, you walked up to me and said “Hello” like you knew me. Wish I would have talked to you more! Would like to get to know you! When: May 7, 2011. Where: March of Dimes Walk. #1118-0517

YOU: GUY ON RED HARLEY Me: girl on black Kawasaki. You asked me about my bike. The light turned green. I could swear I saw you look back after I turned. I wanna check you out without the helmet on! When: May 16, 2011. Where: Roosevelt Blvd. #1128-0607 BOHEMIAN BLONDE BOND GIRL I got a quantum of solace from your rendition of “Love and Marriage,” too bad the horn player only knew one riff per song. You’re far too beautiful to be hidden behind a bulkhead, guess everyone on the boat knows how I feel about that now. Won’t miss the cobblestones, but had fun shopping with you in the peanut gallery. When: May 1, 2011. Where: Riverside. #1127-0607 TALL, DARK AND TATTOOED You: tattooed, sexy man beast. Me: Blue eyed, pouty lipped rock vixen. Lost you in the masses before I could get your name. When: Any Given Saturday. Where: Ritz or Brix at the beach. I want to rock your sox off. When: May 8, 2011. Where: Rockville. #1126-0607 MEMORIAL DAY HOTTIE We both pulled in to get gas. You are bald with goatee, black sunglasses and covered in ink. You fed a tan truck with skull sticker. The sight of you was memorable, sure hope to see you again! When: May 30, 2011. Where: Gate Station on San Jose Blvd. #1125-0607 TALL AND DASHING REDHEAD You bought me a double whiskey diet at The Players Championship. I saw you at a wedding the next weekend and brought you a drink from the open bar. You talked about politics and history, but for some reason I really want to see you again. Your turn to provide the drinks! When: May 14, 2011. Where: The Players Championship. #1124-0531 CHOCOLATE BEAUTY WITH RED WIG Me: 5’8”, dark, chocolate lover searching for some hair supplies. You: medium-skinned trying on wigs. Your friends said it looked good but you don’t need a wig, you’re perfect the way you are. I wanna put my relaxer in your hair, let’s meet? When: May 19, 2011. Where: JC’s Beauty Supply. #1123-0531 HOTTIE SIGNING AUTOGRAPHS You, hottie with tattoos, signing autographs for underage fan-girls. Me, more than a fan-girl, wanting more than an autograph, but unable to do anything but stare at your hotness. I will do anything to prove I am your number one fangirl. When: May 6, 2011. Where: Mayport Base. #1022-0524 PERFECTLY ROUND SHAVED HEAD Beside each other at Winn Dixie on Sunday evening. I noticed your perfectly round shaved head, nice eyes and a tat on your left arm. You waited to leave in your silver x-terra until I was leaving...should’ve said something. When: April 10, 2011. Where: Winn Dixie, Old St. Augustine. #1021-0524 REMEMBER MY UNIQUE NAME? You: Cute manager at the new Mojo’s in Avondale with the beard and Castro cap. Me: Dark red hair, Smiths T-shirt. You came by our table to check on our food and we had a lengthy talk about our distaste for tequila and the Killers. Said you got off too late to hang out that night. When do you get off early? When: May 7, 2011. Where: New Mojo’s. #1120-0517 MOTHER’S DAY POPS SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA You, a beautiful blonde with a green backpack beach chair.

OOPS You: Ritz bartender off work. Me: black curls, green eyes, soft lips. We started making out (for some reason), I paused long enough to ask if u had a gf (OOPS), u said no and we kept going at it. Somehow I have pics of the hot makeout session thanks to my roommate. Good times, I want more! When: April 17, 2011. Where: Ritz. #1117-0510 CUTE GUY ON THE PHONE I first saw you walking around the library, you were wearing a blue shirt, you had a blonde shaved head, Khaki shorts, Then as I was leaving you were on the phone outside, we made eye contact and shared a smile. When: May 4, 2011. Where: Jacksonville Public Library. #1116-0510 WHICH END WAS UP? Your laughter, a melody at my manchild ways. Me, a blubbering idiot for a simple jappy Jew. Let’s sit together forever and watch the world go by. Took loosing each other, too find each other again. Forever after starts now.... When: March 25, 2011. Where: Everywhere. #1115-0503 WE LOCKED EYES I fell hopelessly in love with you the moment I laid eye so on you id do anything to just glace one more time into your eyes an kiss your soft lips I have and I always will. When: April 25, 2011. Where: Our special place by the dumpster. #1114-0503 NATIVE PRINCESS When I met you the blueprint was written. The hair, the curves and the wit are making me smitten. Now I totally know what I want my Robot Girlfriend to look like. So, thanks, Panda. When: Heaven. Where: April 23, 2011. #1113-0503 LEGALLY LUSCIOUS I was enjoying my coffee when your sexy sculptured physique caught my eye. You told me about recently graduating law school. That’s good because I am building a case against you for stealing my heart. I’d love to talk

some legal jargon and ride your bike. I’ll be careful popping the wheelies. Do you object? When: April 19, 2011. Where: Starbucks in Riverside. #1112-0503 GIGGLING GATOR & GYM You: tall, blonde, wearing a Simpsons/FamilyGuy? shirt. Me: oversized yellow shirt. We met once before at a scummy bar, but my wing(wo)man flailed on me & you forgot my name. The second incident was the gym, but I choked. You offered me a place to crash initially, maybe I’ll take you up on that next time? When: April 20, 2011. Where: The Giggling Gator/ Gym. #1111-0503

NAVY OFFICER BEACH BEAUTY Sorry I thought you worked at Walmart, but my point was I wanted to ask you out. I could use a little Naval discipline. When: April 10, 2011. Where: Jax Beach. #1103-0419 HANDSOME AT LOFT THURSDAY You: Handsome, tall, wearing a black DC shirt outside The Loft on Thursday. Wanted to talk to you, will I get the chance? When: April 7, 2011. Where: The Loft. #1102-0419

HOTTIE IN THE GARDEN You, lounging on your foldout in the middle of your Forbes Street yard. I stopped back by in my jeep and you were diggin in the dirt. I think you said your name, but all I can remember is beautiful. When: April 1, 2011. Where: Riverside. #1110-0426

I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD I saw you under the pier, lying stiff as a board and it looked like you weren’t breathing. I poked you and you jumped up at me like a crazy person, but that’s the fastest my heart has ever beat. I hope you read this and remember me, maybe we can talk someday. When: April 5, 2011. Where: Under the pier. #1101-0412

STRAWBERRY MOJITO After we harassed the waiter for strawberry mojitos, it sounded pretty tasty, so you ordered one. Care for another? When: April 19, 2011. Where: Mossfire. #1109-0426 SHARKFEST 2011 You: Red shirt, jeans. Me: Black button-down and dark hair. We made eye contact a few times. Loved your tongue technique with those jello shots. Maybe we can have a little more oral … conversation! When: April 16, 2011. Where: Sharkfest 2011. #1108-0426 MY CHOCOLATE DESIRE You: black workout suit. Me: black/white striped tank. You had me speechless when you walked over to me and placed your arm around me. So much so... I have no idea what you said to me. LOL Let’s try this again? Ms. Intrigued. When: April 15, 2011. Where: Folio Weekly’s Margarita Fest. #1107-0426 ONLY THERE FOR ORIENTATION… I passed you in the main hallway. You had a perfect smile and perfect eyes. We locked eyes up until we passed. And I ran into you a few more times. I had a black polo, short black hair, glasses. You did something to me. When: April 14, 2011. Where: My Workplace in Orange Park. #1106-0426 BEAUTY AND THE BANK You looked a bit flustered at the ATM. Your beautiful curly locks, mesmerizing emerald eyes, and even your faint, perfectly placed freckles made my heart beat frantically. I hope whoever put that ring on hand fills you with the magnitude of joy you filled me with in those brief seconds of bliss! When: March 22, 2011. Where: Chase Bank ATM. #1105-0426

To place your free I Saw U love connection, go to folioweekly.com/isawu.php fax 904.260.9773 or snail mail ATTN: I Saw U Folio Weekly, 9456 Philips Hwy., Ste. 11, Jacksonville FL 32256

SAID HI You were passing me at the register that evening, with a white shirt, and your beautiful eyes reached mine and I said hi. Wish I could have said more. But the smile you gave me with those eyes sold me. Wish I could see you again. When: April 11, 2011. Where: Kangaroo on Southside near Avenues Mall. #1104-0419

WHITE FEDORA, TOP AND PANTS Hat with black band set off your olive skin, your toes were the only other color besides your beautiful eyes. Got you dancing, dreaming, my Queen, I’ve found her! Hoping he’s just a date? A beautiful smile and the face of an angel. Meet me: grey shirt, black hair, for more good music, dancing, smiles, Baymeadows’ My Place, Fridays. When: Sunday after Blues Fest. Where: Atlantic after Blues Fest. #1100-0412 UNDERWATER BANANA HAMMOCK I was taking a dive in the deep end, and swam past the most beautiful humpback whale. You may not be a whale, but I think you know what I want to do to your back. It’s true what they say, “Abyss” was the greatest movie of the ‘80s. Let’s make bubbles. When: March 30, 2011. Where: Underwater. #1099-0412 HEY, I SAW U! I saw you strutting your stuff at some wings n a boat place. Think you’re a fly chick. I know where to find you. Wanna play? When: March 29, 2011. Where: Buffalo Wild Wings. #1098-0405 SOUTHSIDE FENDER BENDER Oops! Sorry about that. You: tall, hot, unshaven, driving a truck. Me: flustered blonde on my way to work. Even though there was no damage, wish we would have exchanged info. When: Feb. 2011. Where: Southside Blvd. #1097-0405

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ACROSS Love-’em-and-leave’em type In ___ (agitated) Face-to-face test Site of the Henley Regatta Pilot who kept ditching his plane in “Catch-22” King Abdullah subject Actress Ward Tasmania’s capital Remark from someone who’s always sponging off you? Body of work Native encountered by Captain Cook “A Treatise on Money” author Mick Jagger’s title Spotted Francis of early TV Comment from someone who doesn’t understand Japanese theater? “___ Fables” Vietnam Wall designer Maya Word with snap or snow Country known for its amusement parks? Mae West accessory Curmudgeon Utterer of “I am Fortune’s fool” Suffices Biography subtitled, “A Dog’s Life”? Page with views The brainy bunch Juegos Olimpicos goal Off the market, perhaps Corp. letters on many freight cars Friend of Bat and Doc Word after “Ready” Sunday amounts Guitarist whose concerts are very well-attended? Slangy physician Red or Yellow, Black

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37 41 42 43 47 49 54 55 56 58 59 61 62 63 64 65 67 69 73 76 1

or White 77 Marketing ploy 78 Berkeley school, popularly 81 Foreshadowing 82 Wine-barrel material 85 Part of a train, often 87 Weapon in Clue 88 “May God smile on your media conglomerate”? 91 Health food store brand, Burt’s ___ 92 George Sand and George Eliot 93 “The Thin Blue Line” director Morris 94 Cheerleader’s cry 95 Dish created by a “Honeymooners” star? 97 It makes MADD mad 99 Part 2 of a sob 101 Ritual repasts 102 Holiday song that scares dogs? 108 Star of “Blade” 112 Bakery buy 113 “Monsters, ___” 114 Plaza Hotel pixie 118 Actor Ryan 119 Nimble-fingered 121 “Goodbye and good riddance!” 124 Disregard 125 She walks into Rick’s 126 “Rawhide” singer 127 Jack’s inferior 128 Took a breather 129 Nectar flavor 130 Break a Commandment 131 Thunder Bay’s prov. 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 5

60 64 66 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75

him Clod chopper Bullying, e.g. Expert Did a dumb thing Apt anagram of “notes” Folded Tap dancer Miller Harm Malt additive? “Closing Bell” network Ronzoni topper, maybe An audit, often On the double After-lunch breaks Florida floater, briefly Faux pas follower Visa rival, briefly Richmond was its cap. Old cry of surprise Reggae musician, often “Not good!” Lounging slipper Stationery stock Egyptian goddess Blowhard’s output 1963 Beach Boys song, “In ___” Like Dylan’s voice G.I. Jane, for one Means something It has a keeper Dos y tres Dict. listings Christianity’s ___ Creed Made fun of Push a pawn, e.g. OPEC summit figure Start of a diary entry

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78 Johnny’s lasted five years in “The Dead Zone” 79 Did impressions of 80 Singer Horne 83 Film whodunit, “The List of ___ Messenger” 84 Sedona or Sorento maker 86 “Avenue Q” song, “What Do You Do with ___ in English?” 87 “William Tell” composer 89 Early automaker 90 Surprised reply 92 “The Red Badge of Courage,” e.g. 95 Medicinal-shampoo ingredient 96 “You rang?” 98 As one 100 Texas oil town 102 Pen name 103 Become stuck 104 Comes by honestly 105 Like skullduggery, often 106 Show stopper? 107 “___ amuse you?” (line from “Goodfellas” 109 Type of sauce 110 Had a bite 111 Viewpoint 115 Poverty, pollution, etc. 116 Place on a plane 117 Writer Wiesel 120 That burning feeling? 122 Spanish shout 123 California Santa?

Solution to “Fast Food for Thought”

DOWN Short stop? Really loud, as a crowd Covet strongly, with “over” Take ___ (get to like) Reply facilitator, w/o the stamp Walrus feature Jittery people are on it Like Ichabod Crane Seminole chief Medicinal Asian mushroom It’s below Tenn. It’s often twirled Pop Warner coached

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JUNE 7-13, 2011 | FOLIO WEEKLY | 45

sUpport

Ask for Action

Produced by jw Checked by

Sales Rep fm

Shut Your Piehole, Jacksonville

For this angry Bill Maher fan, it’s pipe down or get the ball gag

few years back, the editor of this here publication wrote a scathing editorial, taking to task a certain (and growing) segment of the concert-going population, one that exhibits utter disregard for their fellow audience members. Cell phone conversations and shouts requesting “Freebird” have become the norm in concert halls and clubs around Northeast Florida and beyond. It’s become nearly impossible to sit in a quiet theater any more and enjoy a performance without interruption. But at the recent performance by comedian Bill Maher at The Florida Theatre in downtown Jacksonville, I experienced a level of disrespect that even I, the most disrespectful guy I know, couldn’t get my head around. From the moment the lights went down and Maher took the stage, a steady stream of wanderers moseyed up and down the aisles and stumbled over rows of folded legs. They fetched drinks, used the bathroom, chatted with friends (yes,

his now-cowering adversary. Having endured an hour of constant interruption, I snapped and yelled, “Sit the f*ck down!” (Yes, that was me.) At a typical rock concert, this type of behavior may go largely unnoticed or may at least be forgiven in especially loud environs. But Maher is a comedian, a public speaker, and people ostensibly come to hear what the man has to say. Not so on this particular evening. He was background entertainment for some surreal social event. But the irony was lost on me. Fast-forward 22 hours. I am seated in the very same Florida Theatre, preparing to endure a two-and-a-half-hour dance recital, in which my 4-year-old daughter is set to perform two numbers. Mind you, this theater is packed with families, many of which include children ranging from toddlers to teens. I expected mayhem, a hundred pee breaks, shouts of “I love you, Sarah!” There wasn’t a sound out of place. No shouts or hollers, no parades to the

We could all benefit from a little public humiliation — and dismemberment — in the name of decorum. stopped and had conversations while Maher was performing). They treated Maher as if he were a nameless opening act. The couple behind me was especially annoying, he laughing like one of the Muppets (not a genuine chortle, but more of a high-pitched “look-at-me-I-got-the-obscure-reference” cackle), she spewing inanities like “It’s so true!” and “Oh, he is so right!” Cell phones rang, people answered them. The constant howling and heckling, supportive as it was, even got to Maher. Several times he stopped the show to address comments directly, and twice told hecklers to “Shut the f*ck up.” Then, obviously frustrated, asked out loud, “What was I talking about?” The real cake-topper came about two-thirds through the show, when a large and obviously very tough guy stood up about two rows in front of me, turned and threatened the man seated behind him. “Do it again, and I’ll …” he shouted. Out loud. While standing. “I’m serious. Do it again!” Whatever “it” was, it must’ve been very serious, as he kept posturing and threatening

46 | folio weekly | june 7-13, 2011

toilet or the snack bar, no threats of fist-fights. If you were in the Maher audience last week, bravo. An audience of Yo Gabba Gabba fans was more polite than you. Rather than use the remainder of this space to further complain, I’d like to offer a few practical solutions to what we’ll call “The Audience Problem.” These could easily be employed not only at concert venues, but movie theaters, court rooms, high school auditoriums, even churches — wherever there is potential for people’s inner asshole to present itself, thus disrupting an otherwise perfectly entertaining evening. 1. Hidden Trip Wires and Spike Pits: Aside from a slight modification to the aisles and the addition of a small drainage system for blood and sinew, this is an inexpensive method of doing away with “The Mid-Concert Wanderer.” Seriously, if you can’t pee before the show starts, you deserve to be impaled on a spike. And if your social anxiety is so out of control that you need a constant flow of booze in order

to sit still for two hours, you probably won’t notice the spike piercing your forehead as you tumble toward eternal silence. 2. A Universal Cell Phone Jamming Signal: Each theater should be equipped with a transmitter that sends out a signal that not only jams any and all electronic devices, but also completely erases the memory of any device employed during the show. The jammer would prevent phones from ringing, saving those more considerate audience members the disturbance. And if someone were to try to dial out or check email, their phone’s memories would be completely erased. Presto! No more Kenny G mp3s, no more porn downloads, no more jpgs of your mistress in a bunny suit. All gone, forever. 3. Automated Ball Gag System: This may be prohibitively expensive for some theaters, but just imagine. A system of tracks would be installed throughout the rafters, on which would roll automated telescoping poles, to which ball gags would be attached. The system would be programmed to sense heat and moisture escaping from a mouth open for more than three seconds, emitting excessive volume. (The sensitivity of this volume-detector could be adjusted for everything from “Spoken Word” to “Feature Film” to “Rock Concert.”) Upon triggering, the rig would move quickly and quietly along the track to a position just above the offender, stealthily lower its pole and slam the ball gag into the gaping chasm of said chatterbox, simultaneously embarrassing him while shutting him the hell up. Suck on that, Wind Bag! 4. Patron-Activated Spike Pit: In the interest of putting the power in the hands of the consumer, each seat could be equipped with a button that would activate a hidden door below the feet of someone passing along their row. This would only be enabled from the time the curtain rises until the houselights come up, to avoid accidental impalement. If someone is kneebanging his way toward you in an attempt to get to the aisle so he can empty his bladder for the third time in 15 minutes, give him a little surprise. Depress the button as he steps in front of you and … See Ya! Into the spike pit he goes. Again, this would require major retrofitting, but the results speak for themselves. You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one. We could all benefit from a little public humiliation — and dismemberment — in the name of decorum. Once these simple programs are instituted, it wouldn’t be long before people would enter theaters too frightened to make a sound, scared poopless to get out of their seats. And we could all, each and every one of us, enjoy a show from beginning to end without ever having to yell, “Shut the f*ck up and sit the f*ck down!” John E. Citrone

A longtime Managing Editor at Folio Weekly, Citrone is currently editor of Xomba.com.

Folio Weekly welcomes Backpage Editorial submissions. Essays should be at least 1,200 words and on a topic of local interest or concern. Email your Backpage to themail@folioweekly. com or snail mail it to Anne Schindler, Editor, Folio Weekly, 9456 Philips Highway, Ste. 11, Jacksonville FL 32256. Opinions expressed on the Backpage are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of the editors or management of Folio Weekly.

June 7-13, 2011 | folio weekly | 47

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