Folio Weekly 02/12/14

Northeast Florida’s News & Opinion Magazine • February 12-18, 2014 • 111,191 Readers Every Week • A Sideshow in the Great Circus of Life

FREE

2 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 3

CONTENTS // FEB. 12-18, 2014 • VOLUME 27 • NUMBER 46

EDITOR’S NOTE The Crist Conundrum

L

16

18 MAIL FULL EXPOSURE NEWS SPORTSTALK

5 5 6 8

CRIME CITY COVER STORY OUR PICKS MOVIES

EDITORIAL

BITE-SIZED ASTROLOGY I SAW YOU CROSSWORD

18 24 25 26

27 29 30 31

This is a copyright protected proof ©

Merl Reagle, Melody Taylor, P.F. Wilson, Abigail Wright EDITORIAL INTERNS • Amal Kamal, Travis Crawford VIDEOGRAPHER • Doug Lewis

ADVERTISING

PUBLISHER • Sam Taylor staylor@folioweekly.com / ext. 111 SENIOR ACCOUNT MGR. • Scott Schau sschau@folioweekly.com / ext. 124 Downtown, Riverside, Northside, San Marco ACCOUNT MANAGERS C.J. Allen • callen@folioweekly.com / ext. 120 Beaches, Ponte Vedra Beach, Amelia Island Lee Ann Thornton • lthornton@folioweekly.com / ext. 127 Mandarin, Orange Park Cherish Kelly • ckelly@folioweekly.com / ext. 130 ACCOUNT MGR. / SPECIAL EVENTS MANAGER Ro Espinosa • respinosa@folioweekly.com / ext. 129 Southside, Avondale, Arlington MOBILE APP ADVERTISING ACCOUNT MGR. Kathrin Lancelle • klancelle@folioweekly.com / ext. 125 Intracoastal West, St. Augustine

Folio Weekly is published every Wednesday throughout Northeast Florida. It contains opinions of contributing writers that are not necessarily the opinion of this publication.

Folio Weekly welcomes both editorial and photographic contributions. Calendar information must be received three weeks in advance of event date.

Copyright © Folio Publishing, Inc. 2014. All rights reserved. Advertising rates and information are available on request. An advertiser purchases right of publication only. One free copy per person.

Additional copies and back issues are $1 each at the office or $4 by mail, based on availability. First Class mail subscriptions are $48 for 13 weeks, $96 for 26 weeks and $189 for 52 weeks. Please recycle Folio Weekly.

Folio Weekly is printed on recycled paper using soybased inks. 30,000 press run. Audited weekly readership 111,191.

For questions, please call your advertising representative at 260-9770.

FAX YOUR PROOF IF POSSIBLE AT 268-3655

EDITOR • Jeffrey C. Billman jbillman@folioweekly.com / ext. 115 A&E EDITOR • David Johnson djohnson@folioweekly.com / ext. 128 COPY EDITOR • Marlene Dryden mdryden@folioweekly.com / ext. 131 STAFF WRITER • Ron Word rword@folioweekly.com / ext. 132 PHOTOGRAPHER • Dennis Ho dho@folioweekly.com / ext. 122 CARTOONISTS Tom Tomorrow, Average Jim CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Rob Brezsny, Daniel A. Brown, John E. Citrone, Hal Crowther, Julie Delegal, Jade Douso, Marvin R. Edwards, Katie Finn, AG Gancarski, Nicholas Garnett, Claire Goforth, S. Carson Howell, Dan Hudak, Shelton Hull, Amanda Long, Heather Lovejoy, Nick McGregor, Bonnie Mulqueen, Kara Pound, Chuck Shepherd,

E OF BENEFIT

MUSIC INTERVIEW ARTS DINING

ADVERTISING PROOF

Cover Design: Shan Stumpf PUBLISHER • Sam Taylor staylor@folioweekly.com / ext. 111

9 10 14 16

8

SUPPORT

DESIGN

ART DIRECTOR • Chad Smith csmith@folioweekly.com / ext. 116 SR. GRAPHIC DESIGNER • Katarina Lubet klubet@folioweekly.com / ext. 117 JR. GRAPHIC DESIGNER • Kim Collier kcollier@folioweekly.com / ext. 117 VIDEO INTERN • Audra Isbell PHOTO INTERN • Jay Ramirez II

ASK FOR ACTION

Produced by KL _ Checked by

BUSINESS & ADMINISTRATION BUSINESS MGR. • Lynn McClendon fpiadmin@folioweekly.com / ext. 119 VICE PRESIDENT T. Farrar Martin / fmartin@folioweekly.com

DISTRIBUTION

RUN DATE:

021214

Sales Rep _SS

Bobby Pendexter / cosmicdistributions@gmail.com

GET SOCIALIZED FOLIOWEEKLY.COM

FOLIO WEEKLY STORE folioweeklystore.com

BITE CLUB

facebook.com/folioweeklybiteclub

Download Layar and scan when you see the Layar symbol to discover interactive content.

This publication offers you great digital experiences using the Layar App.

thefolioweekly

@folioweekly

@folioweekly

Mobile App

For the best in Live Music, Arts, Sports, Food and Nightlife, download the DOJAX Mobile App by texting “Folio” to 77948

9456 Philips Highway, Ste. 11, Jacksonville FL 32256 Phone: 904.260.9770 • Fax: 904.260.9773

4 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

eave it to Bill Maher to sum up Charlie Crist’s perpetual reinvention — from conservative Republican to populist, pro-gay, pro-pot, pro-choice Democrat — so succinctly: “You like being in office,” the HBO host told Florida’s once and perhaps future governor on last week’s Real Time.

“You don’t care how you get there.”

“I like serving,” was all Crist could muster in response.

It was a mostly sympathetic interview — Crist there to promote his election-year book, The Party’s Over: How the Extreme Right Hijacked the GOP and I Became a Democrat, Maher using Crist to buttress his argument that Republicans have gone around the bend — but Maher got it exactly right. Charlie Crist’s constituency is, and has always been, Charlie Crist. He’s as opportunistic and selfserving as Republicans now claim, and was so back when Democrats were the ones calling him an empty suit.

All that’s changed is the label — and the tribe rallying behind it.

It’s hardly been remarkable to watch Crist perform policy 180s in service of political gain; a zebra can hardly change his stripes.

What is amazing is the degree to which the state’s Democrats, especially elites, have rallied around him.

Imagine how different Democrats’ reaction would have been, if Crist still had an “R” behind his name, to last week’s news that major Crist contributor Scott Rothstein — currently facing decades behind bars for masterminding a Ponzi scheme — accused the former governor of, basically, selling judgeships while in office. Instead of demanding investigations, Crist supporter Dan Gelber (a former Democratic attorney general candidate) called Rothstein the “Hannibal Lecter of liars.”

Rothstein is a con man, and shouldn’t be taken at his word. But we should also remember that perhaps the most notorious corruption scandal in state history, at least in recent memory, occurred under Crist’s watch — and his guy was at the center of it. In 2013, Jim Greer, the GOP state party leader while Crist was governor, pleaded guilty to four counts of theft and one count of money laundering — most notably, creating a company, Victory Strategies, to which he then secretly funneled nearly $200,000 in state party contracts. (He was last seen working at an Orlando La-Z-Boy for $8 an hour as part of a work-release program.) In depositions and interviews taken before his plea bargain — in which he also accused top Republican lawmakers, including state Sen. John Thrasher, of racism, intentional voter suppression, radicalism and general corruption — Greer insisted Crist knew all about his Victory Strategies scheme. Crist denied it, of course.

The Greer scandal would have offered Democrats a wondrous opportunity to take the pine to Tallahassee’s sleazy Republican machine, now headed as it is by an alleged Medicare-scamming scoundrel, were Crist not so tainted by it.

This isn’t in any way an apologia for Rick Scott, a charlatan for whom I couldn’t muster an ounce of sympathy for riches beyond the dreams of avarice. But it is a stunning indication of how weak and feckless and desperate the state Democratic party is, that it’s acquiescing Crist’s ambitions with barely a murmur of protest.

Jeffrey C. Billman twitter/jeffreybillman jbillman@folioweekly.com

MAIL Thanks, Baptists

Please allow me to congratulate you on the breath of fresh air that you have brought to the issues that bedevil this city [Editor’s Note, “The Wild West,” Jeffrey C. Billman, Jan. 22]. I am sure that your take on the Baptists who run the city and the racist gun-toting rednecks among us will cause a hue and cry among them. Your characterization of Michael Dunn as a racist prick is spot on. Unfortunately, he’s not the only one. There are scores of Michael Dunns all around the First Coast.

This Bold New City of the South will never amount to much as long as people such as him are allowed to run around like a bunch of pilgrims in a John Wayne movie. And if you want to really get me started, bring up the Baptists and block upon block of prime Downtown land just sitting there. Sure, there are pockets of light down there, but once one moves past The Elbow and a couple of other spots, it’s a wasteland. As the old saying goes, “There is no there there.” Thank you, Baptists, for creating a Downtown core where the tumbleweeds roll down the streets and the only life to be seen are the homeless and disenfranchised living out of plastic bags and shopping carts.

— Clark Castle

Caution: Sociopaths Everywhere

I have a [concealed weapon permit] and carry a pistol when I think I should [“The Wild West”].

Accidents and assaults with guns are reported more than crime prevention. It may not be the Wild West in your world, but Jeff Cooper, among others, has estimated that 1 percent of the general population is sociopathic. Start with a level playing field for earning a decent living and ascend Maslow’s hierarchy of needs.

FULL EXPOSURE // DENNIS HO

Guns are just low-hanging fruit of much more complex problems.

Brave and Caring People

— David Stearns

While I agree that it’s a shame humankind has not evolved to a point that has rendered guns unnecessary, and that you must overly sensationalize your message to make a point [“The Wild West”], please consider giving more “voice to the voiceless and champion the best parts of the community” (to quote you).

It seems to me that gun-toters must be afraid of something if they feel the need to carry weapons. If we give voice to the voiceless and champion the best parts of our community, let’s hear it for the fearless folks who walk through life unarmed. Let’s praise their courage and intelligence. Also, let’s give kudos to those individuals with manners and a deep respect for their fellow human beings, including those who know to exit a darkened theater to text or make a call, responsible motorists who don’t endanger others with distracted driving, and those who play their music at a reasonable volume so as not to annoy others. Brave and caring people such as these deserve our recognition.

— J. Kennedy

Corrections In last week’s cover story, “Marriage Equality. Now,” we incorrectly wrote that Alan’s family returned Billy’s possessions under court order. In fact, they did so under the threat of a court order.

If you would like to respond to something that appeared in Folio Weekly, please send an email with your name, address and phone number (for verification purposes only) to mail@folioweekly.com.

AHOY, MATEY: Scott Erkelens, Bill Filaski and Bill McCrea imbibe together at the monthly gathering of the St. Augustine Swashbucklers at White Lion Pub on Feb. 9. The 120-member group of pirate actors volunteer their time for charitable, educational and festival events, as well as social gatherings. McCrea, the group’s captain, returned to his hometown of St. Augustine after spending 25 years as a magician in Las Vegas. He became a pirate actor after realizing street performers were no longer allowed on St. George Street. He’s since embraced his new role. “My day job is at the Pirate and Treasure Museum,” says McCrea, whose seafaring alter-ego is William Mayhem. “I’m a full-time pirate.”

FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 5

NEWS

The End of Marriage?

A local attorney says that despite all the GOP rhetoric about the importance of matrimony, the Florida Legislature is poised to hasten its demise

J

udith Erwin embodies most people’s definition of an accomplished woman, but she’s not so sure. She’s a successful family law attorney. She recently published her first novel, Shadow of Secrets, about a woman who desperately works to keep her marriage together after the worst violation imaginable. She teaches a memoir-writing class at University of North Florida’s Department of Continuing Education. She writes a blog called The Death of Marriage.

Erwin has been a student of marriage for three decades — since she started her life over in the wake of her divorce. She’s got a library full of books on the subject — along with a head full of doubts and fears and one big sorrow.

She still regrets that her grown children can’t see Mom and Dad under the same roof for “the events of life”: holidays, birthdays, graduations.

“It’s not just the loss of companionship and love of a mate,” says Erwin, 75. “It’s the unity of the family. Divorce fragments the family.”

Erwin fears that by the year 2100, “marriage” won’t even be in our vocabulary.

“For better and for worse, in sickness and in health, it’s all going out the window.”

And in Florida, Erwin argues, lawmakers are helping to push matrimony over the ledge.

Along with her cohorts in The Florida Bar, Erwin vocally opposed the alimony “reform” bill passed last year by the Florida Legislature, but vetoed by Gov. Rick Scott. That bill would have ended permanent alimony — in which the higher-earning spouse has to write the lower-earner a check every month for the rest of his or her life — and made it more difficult to collect alimony following marriages lasting 11 years or fewer.

Ending permanent alimony, Erwin says, chills a partner’s willingness to sacrifice vocational pursuits for the good of the family.

In an interview with Folio Weekly, Erwin also had a few things to say about the economics of teamwork, and how feminism has affected marriage — for better or worse.

“If we destroy the family,” Erwin says, “we destroy how our children grow up, and what they learn about values.”

BY THE NUMBERS

Marriage rates have declined, especially among young people. In 2012, only 31 of 1,000 previously unmarried women tied the knot, according to the National Center for Family and Marriage Research, down from 92 in 1920 and the lowest rate in at least a century.

Since 1960, the marriage rate has dropped by 60 percent, as societal constraints have loosened and more young couples opted for cohabitation. Divorce rates, meanwhile, have shot up, and those who divorce are less likely to remarry.

This has not escaped the attention of politicians. Conservatives are latching onto these statistics as the scapegoat for stagnating social 6 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

Photo: Dennis Ho

mobility. Meanwhile, liberals prefer to talk about poverty in terms of policies that exacerbate economic inequality.

U.S. Sen. Marco Rubio, R-Fla., caught flack from women’s groups last month for highlighting the correlation between unmarried, single-parent families and childhood poverty. In a speech at a conference sponsored by the American Enterprise Institute, Rubio argued that being unmarried causes poverty. “The greatest tool to lift people,” Rubio said, “to lift children and families from poverty, is one that decreases the probability of child poverty by 82 percent. But it isn’t a government program. It’s called marriage.”

financially ready, and women see it “as a sign of having arrived rather than a way to get there,” as The New York Times reported in a 2012 piece on children born out of wedlock.

Marriage has become something many individuals work to “afford,” and in turn, its benefits ease the road to building more wealth. Combining salaries and sharing costs provide economy-of-scale advantages. That is, it’s cheaper for two adults to support one household than two. In addition, marriage enables the division of household and childrearing duties, as well.

And unmarried, cohabitating couples don’t necessarily reap the same benefits.

Marriage, Erwin points out, affords individuals

“If we destroy the family, we destroy how our children grow up, and what they learn about values.”

The actual number, as the PolitiFact website pointed out, is closer to 71 percent.

Even so, there’s evidence that Rubio is conflating correlation and causation, and that the causal relationship between marital status and economic status may in fact be the exact opposite: The research tells us that more educated, wealthier individuals are more likely to get married in the first place. In other words, higher socioeconomic status leads to marriage, which in turn enables a couple to build more wealth.

Perhaps the more accurate version of Rubio’s assertion is that low earning power causes unmarried parenthood. Single parenthood, rather than causing poverty, tends to sustain the lower earning potential that prevents individuals from marrying in the first place.

As evolved Americans, we bristle at the idea that marriage is today so closely associated with economics, but, as the studies tell us, it’s still true: Men wait to marry until they’re

the security to take risks that unmarried individuals might not take.

The experts agree. Ohio State University researcher Jay Zagorsky has studied wealth and marital status, and argues that many cohabitating couples are “living together as a sort of trial.” Essentially, they’re holding back on a lifetime commitment, which curbs their willingness to fully combine resources.

It’s what Erwin calls the “everyone looks out for himself ” phenomenon.

“I was taught that you have to sacrifice — everyone has to compromise and give up certain things,” Erwin says. “You’re dooming it if you don’t have teamwork.”

She gives the example of a military family with two working spouses that relocated to advance the husband’s career. To make the move, the wife chose a pay cut and a relatively stagnant career path. Twenty-five years pass, and the wife now faces a very different career outlook. “After 25 years, you

can’t possibly think she can jump back in,” Erwin says.

What’s more, the average marriage lasts only 10 to 15 years. “How can anyone sacrifice for that?”

ALL-IN

In Erwin’s view, the Florida Legislature’s reappearing proposal on alimony “reform” would further curtail a partner’s willingness to go all-in for marriage. Instead of looking out for the marriage, partners will look out for their own interests.

Last year, lawmakers passed a reform bill, but Gov. Scott vetoed it, calling it disruptive to already existing post-divorce arrangements.

Women’s rights advocates cheered. But the reformers haven’t given up. They’ve now created a group called Family Law Reform, and have re-emerged with a documentary in tow, Divorce Corp., a self-described “shocking exposé of the inner workings of the $50 billion a year U.S. family law industry.” State Rep. Ritch Workman, R-Melbourne, is on record saying that the revamped legislation wouldn’t end permanent alimony per se, but might include language that warns both spouses to expect a standard-of-living decline after their divorce.

Women’s groups are skeptical, and have vowed to fight any legislation that would hurt women and children. Since wives have historically made more sacrifices for the family unit than husbands, women arguably have more at stake in this fight.

FEMINISM’S FAULT?

There is a school of thought that says women — particularly feminists — are responsible for the breakdown of the traditional family, and so, in a way, have brought the problem that alimony reformers want to address upon themselves.

NEWS IíĽğįĉ ğ qIJįFPØ æıÃæ į Ĥ ğʼn ĥį Phyllis Schlafly, the 1970s-era antifeminist icon, has reentered the news in conservative circles. On Jan. 14, the right-wing online outlet WorldNetDaily captured Schlafly saying that feminism is “the main reason why we have broken families, high divorce rate, illegitimacy. They are the biggest enemy of the family,” she said of feminists, in an article about how the (never-ratified) Equal Rights Amendment ushered in conservatives’ second enemy, gay marriage. “I think the feminists have been responsible for destroying the family,” Schlafly said.

Even a liberal member of the British Parliament, the Labour Party’s Diane Abbott, has said that feminism failed to address the breakdown of two-parent, married, stable families.

Abbott told the Telegraph on Jan. 26, “As a feminist, perhaps we have been ambivalent about families. … Those of us who came of age at the height of feminism had very mixed views about the family, since it seemed to be defined as a heterosexual thing with a certificate, children and mum at home.”

Not so fast, says Erwin. Just because feminism hasn’t yet tackled how to value work shouldered mostly by unpaid or underpaid women, that doesn’t mean we can blame women for the impending death of marriage. Indeed, Erwin argues that feminism has been largely good for women.

“Women stopped depending on men.

Women don’t accept maltreatment anymore,” she says. “They can say, ‘I don’t have to put up with you.’ ” Moreover, women are no longer shackled to domestic enterprises where men were — without question — absolute CEOs. “Women should have options,” Erwin says, noting that they are freer now than ever before to pursue the careers that suit them.

More often than not, though, as AnneMarie Slaughter has written in an oft-cited Atlantic piece, desirable and well-paying career choices don’t include caring for the vulnerable, including children. Feminists, in their rush to pursue a plethora of new work choices for women and make headway for all of us, have not yet tackled an important

question: How should society recognize and compensate the undervalued — but critical — work of caring?

Slaughter, a politics and international affairs professor at Princeton, argues that caring for others has been devalued in the American economy. In order for a society to survive, she writes, it needs to balance competition with caring. The U.S. excels at the former, less so at the latter.

But even as early feminists may have inadvertently contributed to the economic devaluation that Slaughter describes, a new breed is changing the family-values landscape. Stay-at-home husbands, at least in some upper-middle-class households, are helping the cause of equality.

In marriages where men have taken on primary household or parenting duties, enabling their wives to pursue high-powered careers, the wives readily admit the value of their partners’ unpaid work. And their employers do, too. In a New York Times piece titled “Wall Street Mothers, StayHome Fathers,” a Wells Fargo executive acknowledged that women whose husbands stay home are some of the “top performers.”

Their husbands speak for legions of women who have postponed or altered their career plans to benefit the couple or family: questioning what has come of their education, and wondering how on earth they’ll ever pick up again in the workforce once the children are grown.

“It goes both ways,” Erwin says, steering the conversation back to alimony reform.

Fixing limits on alimony, she says, will punish either partner who decides to trade career time for child-rearing time. Without the opportunity for a judge to weigh the sacrifices of the lesser-earning spouse if the marriage ends, giving up a potential career path becomes dangerous business.

“Marriage comes with disillusionments,” Erwin says. “But then you realize, it’s give and take.”

Unless, that is, it ceases to exist.

ØPĽ Ĝĥį ÀíqíØPı

Julie Delegal mail@folioweekly.com

FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 7

SPORTSTALK

King Hippo and His Chutzpah

On George Zimmerman’s scheduled (fake) fight with has-been DMX, which will (probably) never happen

A

8 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

couple of weeks back, on Folio Weekly’s blog, I wrote an appreciation of George Zimmerman’s “painting” of Angela Corey.

That, combined with Wes Denham’s excellent analysis of the painting in last week’s Crime City [“Red Becomes Her”], likely stand as the last critique of Zimmerman’s visual arts in this magazine for the foreseeable future.

After all, the Z-man’s forte isn’t really painting, but self-promotion. Those who wonder where he would turn up next can’t be surprised by his foray into the sports world — that is, if you can call celebrity boxing a sport.

Promoter Damon Feldman, known for his fixed celebrity fights, booked the portly pugilist for a “fight” on March 15 against gone-and-almost-forgotten rapper DMX, most notable for poignant culturaltouchstone singles like “Where Tha Hood At” and “What These Bitches Want.”

Feldman announced this fight on the eve of what would have been Trayvon Martin’s 19th birthday, an especially classy touch. Following a thunderstorm of outrage — imagine that — over the weekend, he announced that he’d cancelled the fight. Then he said he was rethinking the cancellation, and that there would be a press conference on Tuesday (after this publication goes to press) announcing his “final decision.”

“Zimmerman,” he told one website, “still wants to fight.”

Whether or not this thing actually happens, it’s still a remarkable footnote in the seemingly endless George Zimmerman saga — and more evidence that Zimmerman (a dead ringer for King Hippo from Mike Tyson’s Punch Out) will do just about anything to monetize reasonable doubt and the highestprofile loss of the Corey era. This, as you might expect, has led some to criticize him.

One such critic: Jacksonville defense attorney John Phillips, who is working on behalf of Jordan Davis’ parents in the legal action against gas station gunman Michael Dunn, and who is vigilantly opposed to Stand Your Ground.

“The first thing everyone needs to realize is that this promoter is a wanna-be Vince McMahon,” Phillips told me last week, before the fight was called off. “It is all fake. [Also],

everything about Zimmerman seems to be completely without accountability.”

And then he kept going: “[Zimmerman] had a history of abusiveness and even once turned off his mother’s electricity? But that wasn’t relevant to his trial. He got out of his car and murdered a kid? He was innocent.

He and his wife lied and had a code about the legal fund? Nope, he was just misunderstood.

He gets pulled over repeatedly? He’s not reckless; he’s scared. He has spousal and domestic abuse allegations? No, don’t listen to them, they’re out to ruin him. Clear copyright theft? The AP is victimizing him.

Fake wrestling making headlines? The guy is taking a 180-degree position to what was sworn about his training at trial [in which Zimmerman’s team claimed that he lacked the fighting ability to defend himself].”

Given Zimmerman’s gleeful fl outing of the very basis of his defense not too many moons ago, it’s almost as if he’s deliberately undercutting and lampooning the terms of his exoneration. Whatever one might think about King Hippo’s character, you have to acknowledge his chutzpah.

That said, you also have to wonder where it all ends. It’s been said, in defense of his “art,” that Zimmerman’s justified in selling his works; after all, due to his notoriety, he can’t very well work at Taco Bell. But for a man many Americans believe killed a teenager in cold blood, is his eagerness to “fight” in an arena full of people who despise him a smart move?

Though these celebrity-boxing matches are, in the parlance of pro wrestling, a work, there’s an interesting angle. What if DMX, in an attempt to manufacture 21st-century relevance, decided to throw real punches at Zimmerman? Stranger things have happened, and considering the perverse narrative twists at every turn in Zimmerman’s life story, it seems plausible enough.

Looking for positives? Good news you can use? OK, here ya go: If King Hippo can make it as a boxer, why not Casey Anthony as a mud wrestler? It makes about as much sense — and Anthony probably looks better in a bikini.

AG Gancarski twitter/aggancarski mail@folioweekly.com

CRIME CITY

Backyard Blasters

There’s nothing illegal about shooting stuff on private property – and that’s insane

W

hen I was young, shooting rats on rocks was what you did in Neptune Beach in the summer. Before the federal government spent millions to pump sand from offshore to restore our local beaches, there was, at high water, no beach at all. There were rocks and rats.

The rocks were granite boulders; the rats were flossy 5-pounders, fat from eating dead fish, garbage, sea cooties and the occasional oyster. Against gray rocks, gray rats are almost invisible. The key to shooting them is to use bleach. When you pour it into the crannies, the rats boil up with white bulls-eyes on their fur where the Clorox hit.

With bourbon in a Dixie cup and a box of shells, I whiled away many afternoons blasting vermin, yukking it up when the ricochets whizzed overhead, watching the slugs splash into the ocean.

Yee-haw!

At no time while I was blowing up rats did it occur to me that someone might walk or swim or drive a boat into one of those bullets. I never inquired as to the range of a .22 magnum fired from that rifle. Bourbon, bullets and a hot sun will do that.

No doubt you’re thinking, “Those were the bad old days. In this shiny new century, that stuff is strictly illegal.” You’d be strictly wrong.

Discharging firearms from private property was legal then. It’s more legal now.

Back in the day, cities and counties could limit shooting with ordinances for zoning, noise abatement and health and safety. Now they can’t. In 1987, the state Legislature passed Florida Statute 790.15, which bans local governments from enforcing any firearms ordinances. In 2005, then-Attorney General Charlie Crist wrote the definitive opinion: “It is well settled that absent a general law stating otherwise, local governments have no authority to regulate firearms in any manner.”

There is an exception: Local police can arrest anyone shooting recklessly or negligently.

This sounds more important than it is. Any violation is a misdemeanor, subject to the misdemeanor presence rule that requires cops to actually witness the violation. So far, no appellate courts have defined what “recklessness” and “negligence” are. Is it reckless to shoot squirrels in trees, with the slugs whizzing off into the blue to land miles away? How about blasting targets at midnight

in the back lot with .50 ball that can go through a medium oak tree and a car engine or two?

Nobody knows.

Remarkably, the law levies a fine of $5,000 on any police officer or city official who even attempts to enforce local gun ordinances. It strips away municipal government employees’ sovereign immunity and union and civil service job protections. In other words, they can be fired.

This is not a theoretical problem. Every year, people in Florida are killed by stray bullets — in Deltona last December and in Jacksonville in 2012. Here in Police Zone I, bad boys fire Glocks and AKs into the air on the weekends to impress girls and get laid. I see the slugs in wall plaster in friends’ houses. Out on mile 7 of the Rail Trail, I’ve been peppered with spent pellets from gun club shooters who load extra large shot into their cartridges to bust more clay.

Those steel balls really do a number on the powder finish of a fine bike. They’re not too easy on eyeballs and eardrums, either.

I oppose as futile most attempts to regulate gun ownership. I live 30 yards away from a seafood shack where, for about $200, you can get a stolen Sig Sauer or Glock packed piping hot into your fried shrimp takeout. Would gun ownership limits do anything about those pistols, or the Chinese AKs smuggled through our port?

Of course not. Hell, some hoodlums once tried to sell me a machine gun when I was out walking the Shih Tzu! The state should, however, regulate the discharge of unsafe firearms. The only legitimate uses of firearms are personal protection, sport shooting of targets and skeet, and hunting. Backyard shooting often accompanies backyard drinking and backyard drugging. Requiring cops to park their steeltoed shoes on the property line while goofballs fire through trees and fences, into the air and God knows where, is frightening.

What about condominiums, where you own an equal, undivided share of the common area?

How about apartments? Should you be able to set up a firing range next to the swing set and sandbox? These questions have yet to be addressed, and that’s madness, In Crime City.

&&&

Wes Denham mail@folioweekly.com FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 9

THE TOPLINE NUMBER IS FRIGHTENING:

$2.74 billion.

THE DETAILS ARE SCARY, TOO:

This massive funding gap in the city of Jacksonville’s pension funds for police and firefighters and other employees is expected to grow at a 7-percent-per-year clip, consuming greater and greater chunks of Jacksonville’s budget, forcing the city in turn to raise taxes or slash services or both. Already the credit rating agency Moody’s has put Jacksonville on notice, a move that could soon make it more difficult and expensive for the city to borrow. If nothing is done, the problem will continue to escalate – as it has in cities all over the country, to sometimes devastating effects. Last year, you’ll recall, Detroit filed for bankruptcy to get out from under its crushing $3.5 billion pension debt.

You’d be forgiven for wondering if we’re next. Jacksonville’s not alone, but its case is among the direst. As Steven Halverson, president of Jacksonville Civic Council, put it in a June letter to Mayor Alvin Brown and City Council President Bill Gulliford, “A majority of pension funds in the U.S. are underfunded. But Jacksonville is among the worst-funded public plans in Florida.”

Last year, the mayor appointed the Jacksonville Retirement Reform Task Force and charged it with figuring out a way to dig the Police and Fire Pension Fund – the largest and deepest-in-the-red of the city’s three pension funds – out of its hole. The task force’s final report is due soon.

But on Jan. 21, Mayor Brown pre-empted his own task force by releasing his own plan – no new taxes, but the JEA has to conjure $40 million a year out of thin air – his second attempt in as many years to be the hero of this saga.

So far, the other players’ reactions have been tepid at best.

If there were an easy answer, a quick fix, the city would have figured it out by now.

Instead, there are competing factions – a mayor up for re-election who desperately wants not to raise taxes; a utility that doesn’t want to be the scapegoat; a pension board demanding that the city’s cops and firefighters don’t get shortchanged – and a recipe for gridlock.

Confused? Totally understandable. It’s complicated! But rest assured, good citizens, we’re here to help. What follows is our handy guide, an explainer: everything you ever wanted to know about Jacksonville’s pension crisis but were afraid to ask.

YOU SAY THERE’S A “PENSION CRISIS.” WHAT’S WRONG WITH THE CURRENT SYSTEM? Simply put, the city can’t afford it.

Like most cities, Jacksonville offers its employees a defined benefit plan – a pension – instead of a 401(k) or similar package commonplace in the private sector. City employees, the state and the city all pay into a fund, which is then invested, and the returns are used for the retirement and disability benefits promised to city workers. Cops and firefighters, for instance, contribute 7 percent of their salaries, while the state chips in 4 percent and the city adds another 3 percent each year as a cost-of-living increase.

Over the last decade, the city’s annual contribution to the pension has skyrocketed, growing by 1,125 percent, from $10 million in 2003 to $122 million in 2013. That $122 10 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

million is more than 12 percent of the city’s annual operating budget, and comes from the same pot as funds for libraries, the arts, police and firefighters, and parks.

Every dollar that goes to the pension fund is a dollar that doesn’t go to some other essential city service.

But it’s still not enough – not even close.

Think of it like a credit card: You can pay the minimum balance, but it’s better to pay more. The city usually pays the minimum, and that’s part of the problem.

There are others reasons for the shortfall, too: the fund’s lower-than-expected investment returns; retirees living longer and, thus, drawing more from the fund; state restrictions on how pensions can be invested; and added benefits negotiated between the city and the pension funds, including the Deferred Retirement Option Plan and cost-of-living increases.

Taken together, it’s a perfect storm.

The total unfunded liability, or the amount by which promised payouts exceed available revenue, of the city’s three pension plans – the General Employee Pension Plan, the Corrections Officer Pension Plan, and the Police & Fire Pension Plan – is now $2.7 billion. The Police & Fire Pension Fund’s unfunded liability is $1.7 billion, which is why the mayor’s task force focused on that one.

SO THIS IS THE CITY’S FAULT? In part, sure. But the country’s general economic malaise and generous payouts to retirees – a cop can retire after only 20 years and receive 60 percent of his salary for the rest of his life – have played a role, too.

City officials, however, will tell you that the Police & Fire Pension Fund has overestimated the amount it would receive from its investments, leaving the city on the hook for the rest.

“The city has to pay this money to the pension fund,” says John Keane, who has worked for the city since the Kennedy administration and has run the Police & Fire Pension Fund since ’72. “It belongs to the police and firefighters who have served our citizens.”

© 2013

DIDN’T MAYOR BROWN TRY TO FIX THIS ALREADY? Good memory. Last May, Brown proposed shifting new employees into a 401(k)type plan, making employees pay larger percentages of their salaries into the pension fund, increasing the length of time employees have to work before collecting

City Council President Bill Gulliford

FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 11

assumptions. All of that means the city will need the pension fund’s buy-in to alter the arrangement anytime in the near future.

The Concerned Taxpayers of Duval County group has filed a lawsuit challenging the agreement, alleging it was negotiated in violation of open meeting laws. Fourth Judicial Circuit Judge James Daniel will hear that suit in April.

I HEARD SOMETHING ABOUT A PUBLIC-RECORDS LAWSUIT. Yes, you did, but it doesn’t have anything to do with the task force. Frank Denton, editor of the Times-Union, sued the city for negotiating a deal with the Police & Fire Pension Fund in secret. Denton argued that the deal (which the City Council rejected last year anyway) was reached in violation of Florida’s Sunshine law and should be tossed.

On Dec. 31, Duval County Circuit Court Judge Waddell Wallace issued an injunction, mandating that any pension negotiations from here on out be conducted publicly.

THAT’S A GOOD THING, RIGHT? We think so. But we’re in the media, so we’re a bit biased toward transparency. (It makes our jobs more interesting.)

Scheu, however, says the ruling prevents him from having private discussions about changing retirement benefits. And without those private discussions, “it’s absolutely clear that my hope of reaching a global settlement of this is out the window.”

THAT SOUNDS BLEAK. NOW WHAT? Jacksonville Revenue Reform Task Force leader William Scheu

their pensions from 20 years to 30, and reducing annual cost-of-living increases and disability payments to pensioners.

And, he said, the pension fund had signed off. Problem solved. “It’s a great day for the city of Jacksonville,” Brown exclaimed at a City Hall news conference.

But then, under pressure from the Jacksonville Civic Council – a group of local movers and shakers who thought Brown’s proposal wasn’t a long-term solution – the City Council, which doesn’t like the mayor very much, shot him down cold.

With his proposal imploding, Brown appointed an 18-member task force, headed by attorney William Scheu of the firm Rogers Towers, to examine the pension program and make recommendations on how to fix it. Scheu has been the city’s unofficial problem-solver for decades, heading up a troubled supervisor of elections office and auditing Pell Grants at Florida State College at Jacksonville.

“I hope we can come up with something that all the parties can agree to,” Scheu told Folio Weekly last month. “I certainly don’t have that agreement yet.”

The group’s final report was initially due Feb. 19, though that’s been pushed back at least a week.

WHAT WILL THE TASK FORCE PROPOSE? We don’t know yet, but based on the group’s two draft reports, the task force will likely suggest that the city contribute $210 million a year toward the pension fund – including $90 million in new funding. If the city does that, the pension will be solvent 12 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

by 2036.

But that money has to come from somewhere, and the city won’t get it from a bake sale.

Brown, like a lot of politicians – especially politicians up for re-election, which he is next year – opposes tax hikes. Instead, in December he began talking about selling the city’s “lazy assets” – old, unused buildings, including the former courthouse land and the shipyards. The city has identified 393 properties that have a cumulative taxable value of $91.7 million.

BUT THAT’S DIFFERENT FROM THE PLAN BROWN ANNOUNCED IN JANUARY, RIGHT? Right. His new plan seeks to get money from the JEA, the pension fund and city workers. But we’ll get to that in a minute.

WHY DIDN’T THE TASK FORCE ASK CITY EMPLOYEES TO CONTRIBUTE MORE, TOO? Actually, the task force did talk about reducing benefits and increasing employee contributions, as well as closing down the current pension plans and replacing them with cheaper options. But neither the task force nor the City Council can do that unilaterally.

One of the task force’s expected recommendations is to change a 30-year agreement the city made with the Police & Fire Pension Fund back in 2000. This deal applies to all police and firefighters hired by the city through Sept. 30, 2030, and contains specific provisions for benefits, funding requirements and actuarial

In January, Brown offered his second solution, much of which was similar to the first one. The biggest difference? How he wants to pay for it: the JEA. If the utility ponied up $40 million a year (atop the $240 million it already gives the city annually) and the Police & Fire Pension Fund forked over another $4.5 million annually, that would save the city $2.75 billion over 35 years.

Brown doesn’t want to raise taxes, but he’s also smart enough to recognize that he needs new revenue. This proposal is an attempt to square that circle.

“There is no way the JEA can absorb an additional $40 million,” says JEA chairman Michael Hightower. The only way to do it would be to raise water, sewer and electric rates, he says. It’s still money out of your pocket, but you’d blame the JEA, not City Hall.

THAT’S KIND OF SNEAKY. That’s politics. But there are more problems with hitting up the city-owned utility company: The JEA has been beset by declining revenues, on account of increased conservation and lackluster growth. An additional $40 million a year would hurt the utility’s credit rating, forcing it to pay more on its debts, Hightower says.

He also sees another $1 billion payout on the horizon to meet new carbon and mercury emission standards.

David DeCamp, communications director for Mayor Brown, argues that the JEA could save money creating its own pension plan and moving its employees out of the city’s General Employees Pension Plan (which has a more manageable unfunded liability of $445.4 million).

Hightower says they’ll consider it: “Once we have all the necessary information, as

well as a complete understanding of all the requirements, the potential financial and accounting impacts, and the internal human resource ramifications, we will all be in a better position to engage in a fuller, factbased discussion.”

“I don’t want to be negative,” says Gulliford, the City Council president. “Show me some documentation.”

Last fall, before the City Council fixed its budget gap through a tax hike, Gulliford met with the JEA to see if the utility could help out. “I didn’t see where we could get a significant amount of money from them.”

Nothing has changed since.

Moreover, Keane says he doesn’t know if his pension fund can legally give the city the $4.5 million a year the mayor wants. That money comes from the state to help fund the city pension, but he doesn’t know if it can go toward making the pension plan solvent.

THIS ALL SOUNDS UNCERTAIN. YOU PROMISED TO MAKE THIS CRYSTAL-CLEAR. Sorry.

LEVEL WITH ME: IS JACKSONVILLE THE NEXT DETROIT? We’re much warmer.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. ARE WE GOING BANKRUPT? No. At least, that’s what the task force says. Jacksonville can still raise taxes enough to make the pension fund right.

“No judge in his or her right minds would permit a bankruptcy filing,” says Scheu. “We have so much taxing capability. Bankruptcy is off the table, but I don’t think any much else is.”

Ron Word rword@folioweekly.com Police & Fire Pension Fund executive director John Keane

Listing Addition Form

Issue Date: Wednesday, Feb. 26 Advertising Deadline: Wednesday, Feb. 19 Listing Deadline: Friday, Feb. 21 You may submit your online listing at folioweekly.com/intotheoutdoors.html Name of Business _______________________________________________ Email _______________________ Contact Name ________________________________________________ Website ______________________ Business Address ______________________________________________ ____________________________ (Street, Suite Number, City)

(Neighborhood)

Business Phone ______________________________________________ Cell _________________________ (for editorial questions, if necessary)

Briefly describe (25 words or fewer) your adult outdoor-related business, product or service. Folio Weekly reserves the right to edit. __________________________________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________________________________

Circle only ONE category that best describes your business: Bike and Foot Paths • SCUBA/Snorkel Classes, Equipment, and Trips • Equipment/Outfitter • Fishing Equipment and Charters Local/State National Campgrounds/Parks • Obstacle Courses, Zip-lines and Climbing Walls • Organized Bike Rides • Organized Runs • Outdoor Festivals • Outdoor Organizations and Clubs • Outdoors - Out of Town • Paddle Sports • Public Golf Courses, Equipment and Lessons • Sail/Motor Boating • Surfing/Wind Surfing Classes, Rentals and Competitions Email: mdryden@folioweekly.com • Fax: 904-260-9773 • Snail mail: Folio Weekly, 9456 Philips Hwy., Ste. 11, Jacksonville FL 32256 Forms Must Be Received Before 5 p.m. on Wednesday, Feb. 19, 2014, to be considered for Editorial Listing

FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 13

Our Picks

SCAN THIS PAGE WITH LAYAR APP

Reasons to leave the house this week

COMEDY BENSON’S MOVIE INTERRUPTION

Making Sad Keanu funny is the least of Doug Benson’s troubles. As he prepares to interrupt 1991’s “classic” Point Break on President’s Day (get it?), Benson’s real challenge will be living up to the hype after last year’s Benson Movie Interruption, when he broke in on Robocop and Dirty Dancing. Benson makes good (and not-so-good) movies better with one-liners and pot jokes. Known for pot documentary Super High Me, Benson’s here just as a Robocop remake hits theaters and a Point Break remake is rumored. 4:20 p.m. (of course) Feb. 17, Sun-Ray Cinema, 5 Points, $20.

Benson also appears 8 p.m. Feb. 12 at The Comedy Zone in Mandarin, $20.

ROCKABILLY SOUTHERN CULTURE ON THE SKIDS

Imagine all the accumulated weirdness of ’90s surf and rockabilly mashed up and deep-fried with an all-too-accurate parody on white-trash trailerpark living, and you’ve got Southern Culture on the Skids. Dig This, the October 2013 rerelease of the band’s breakthrough ’94 album Ditch Diggin’, highlights guitarist/vocalist Rick Miller’s ability to genre-hop from country to surf to psychedelic with a simple flick of his pick or a stomp on an effects pedal. SCOTS is known for trippy live shows that feature fried chicken, banana pudding and general oddity. 8 p.m. Feb. 19 at Jack Rabbits, San Marco, $15 in advance.

FOLK DREAMS WHETHERMAN

To the cynic, crowdfunding can sound an awful lot like begging. But in some cases, you’re subsidizing a dream. Indie folk project Whetherman, founded

by Nicholas Williams, seeks to raise $13,500 to send the trio on its first European tour. Dreaming or begging, you be the judge. The Kickstarter campaign, which began Feb. 10, puts Whetherman on a show circuit in May and June from Germany to Denmark. The shows are booked – the band just needs to get across the pond. Whetherman performs 7:30 p.m. Feb. 15 at Mudville Music Room, St. Nicholas.

FEBRUARY 15

EQUALITY CONCERT KICK’D OUT FUN(D)

“When kids of any background are forcibly removed [from their homes], they usually become a negative statistic. When you meet kids and give them the support they need, they’re going to make positive choices.”

Musician Stacey Bennett puts her talent behind those words. History teacher by day and Pretty Police State singer by night, Bennett (pictured) has organized an eclectic night of music and art to support JASMYN’s Kicked Out Fund. Known for powerful, thought-provoking folk, Pretty Police State joins Civil Brute, Meredith Rae Woodard and American Idol contestant Connor Zwetsch, as well as visual artists Jim Smith, Tony Wood and Craig Monroe (whose pieces are raffled). 6-10 p.m. Feb. 15, Underbelly, Downtown, $10.

COASTAL VIBES THE EXPENDABLES

Reggae and punk will fuse. Guitars will duel. And, no doubt, The Expendables will do some Ganja Smugglin’ a stone’s throw from the Atlantic Ocean. The Santa Cruz quartet knows how to get concertgoers waving their hands. The ska veterans have learned from the best, touring the world with Slightly Stoopid, NoFX, Less Than Jake, Pennywise and Pepper. Doors swing open for a night of reggae, 6 p.m. Feb. 19 at Freebird Live, Jax Beach, $20 in advance.

ROMANCE CASABLANCA

Here’s looking at you, blokes. Our culture requests (nay, demands!) that the guys plan the perfect Valentine’s date. (Men, feel free to fight this stereotype, but make sure your mate is as forward-thinking as you.) So, Sun-Ray Cinema is offering 1942’s Oscar-winning, tear-jerking film of love and honor, along with a three-course meal.

Owner Tim Massett says it includes the “hummus looking at you” platter (see what he did there?).

7 p.m. Feb. 14, Sun-Ray Cinema, 5 Points, $30 per person.

14 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

JAZZ BEN VEREEN

After 66 years and at least two knee surgeries, Ben Vereen’s still got moves. (We’re not sure how.) The Tony-winner is best known for performances in Jesus Christ Superstar, Pippin and, unfortunately, a thing at Ronald Reagan’s inaugural celebration where he wore blackface. But the man with the wicked voice and magical moves has made more than enough comebacks, most recently in a guest role on (wait for it) How I Met Your Mother. Vereen joins several local jazz favorites as co-host and headliner of Jazz on The Bridge, a concert benefiting one of the city’s best children’s services nonprofits. 7-10 p.m. Feb. 15 at FSCJ’s Kent Campus, $50 in advance, $75 at the door.

FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 15

ADVERTISING PROOF This is a copyright protected proof ©

A&E // MOVIES

For questions, please call your advertising representative at 260-9770.

FAX YOUR PROOF IF POSSIBLE AT 268-3655

RUN DATE:021214

E OF BENEFIT

SUPPORT

Produced by CS_ Checked by

ASK FOR ACTION

Sales Rep LA_

Photo: Warner Bros.

ADVERTISING PROOF Everything Is (Surprisingly) Awesome This is a copyright protected proof © A flimsy product-tie-in premise actually gives way

to subversion and smarty-pants wit

For questions, please call your advertising representative at 260-9770.

FAX YOUR PROOF IF POSSIBLE AT 268-3655 THE LEGO MOVIE ***@ 021214 Rated PG RUN DATE:

A

t first, the idea of a film based on a pile of Sales Rep KL_ as its narrative colorful toy bricks launching point seemed patently absurd.

Had Hollywood’s desperate need to find product tie-ins for every and any toy gone completely bonkers? What’s next? A big-screen adaptation of Lincoln Logs? A Slinky action adventure? If Battleship, Transformers and G.I. Joe were any indication, The Lego Movie would prove to be yet another culturally bankrupt attempt to capitalize on corporate synergies.

Then, adding insult, there was the letter instructing members of the press to include the requisite trademark symbol with all mentions Lego — including the movie’s title. Attention this is a copyright protectedofproof © Warner Bros. Marketing Division: I am a film critic, not a brand ambassador … tions, please call your advertising representative at 260-9770. rUn dAte: 053111… Or so I thought.

Turns out, I’m going to unwillingly be both.

R PROOF IF POSSIBLE AT 268-3655 Because integrity be damned, The Lego Movie not onlyRep highly Produced by ab Checked by is Sales dbentertaining, it’s downright e of benefit sUpport Ask for Action subversive. Writers and directors Chris Miller and Phillip Lord (Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, 21 Jump Street) bring a smarty-pants wit to a kid’s movie that’s both meticulous and © ridiculous.

2014 The mishmash visual design is an audacious riot of color, punctuated by glitchprone character animation and fantastically tactile landscapes. The plot is a brazen hijacking of The Matrix films, throwing in sight gags, satirical commentary, frenzied action sequences and hilarious pop culture deflations.

The best is Will Arnett’s ineptly chauvinistic Batman and a frenemy-like relationship between The Green Lantern (voiced by Jonah Hill) and Superman (Channing Tatum).

But what really makes Miller and Lord’s giddy, riotous film stand out is its unrepentant critique of social conformity. The movie’s villains include trigger-happy cops, a corporate oligarch as president, rampant government surveillance and an oppressive system of compliance and mindless acceptance. The film’s show-stopping pop tune, “Everything Is Awesome,” is as catchy as it is frightening, a radio-friendly bubblegum melody extolling the virtues of droning pack-mentality consensus.

Emmett Brickowoski (Chris Pratt), a low-level construction worker, is exactly the kind of lemming this system relies on.

Having enthusiastically drunk society’s

SE OF BENEFIT

SUPPORT

ASK FOR ACTION

Produced by _KL Checked by

Advertising proof

16 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

© 2014

Kool-Aid, Emmett never deviates from Lego World’s step-by-step instruction manual.

He loves “Everything Is Awesome” (which plays all day long on the radio), happily and unquestioningly pays $37 for a cup of coffee — like a good consumer should do — and idolizes President Business (Will Ferrell), a quasi-religious corporate leader who cannot stand disorder. Emmett’s job is to knock down chaotically imaginative buildings and replace them with featureless towers.

Late one night at the construction site, Emmett runs into the black-clad Wyldstyle (Elizabeth Banks), who’s combing the wreckage for the storied Piece de Resistance, which will stop President Business from using the Kragle to glue down every Lego in its proper place. Unfortunately, Emmett ends up with the artifact stuck to his back, unexpectedly making him “The Special.” Before you can say “Neo rip-off,” the two are meeting up with the rebellion’s leader, the wizard Vitruvius (Morgan Freeman), and fleeing from the Mr. Smith-like Good Cop/Bad Cop (Liam Neeson).

President Business oozes anti-1 percent nastiness, and Miller and Lord’s timely allegories are craftily hidden in a busy, gagheavy tale that doesn’t make a lick of sense but moves along so speedily you’ll hardly notice.

Occasionally, The Lego Movie’s relentlessly frenetic pace crosses into ADHD territory, forgetting to give its characters much in the way of nuance (like, say, Toy Story). Lego World is also noticeably lacking in diversity — even though the movie does land a genuinely funny Star Wars joke, a cameo appearance by Lando Calrissian doesn’t count.

Much like Legos themselves, Miller and Lord’s movie understands the joy of free play and the goofy randomness that kids bring to storytelling. The Lego Movie revels in that anarchy while acknowledging that sometimes the spirit of cooperation has its virtues. When rule-following Emmett finally has his gamechanging epiphany — he notices that the rebellious Master Builders seem unable to work together for their common cause — The Lego Movie’s desire to inveigh against social conformity turns into a plea for collectivism.

It’s a message that will inevitably send the blood pressures of Fox News pundits through the roof.

Jeff Meyers mail@folioweekly.com

A&E // MOVIES

MAGIC LANTERNS

Playing for Keeps

P

syched about the upcoming second season of House of Cards, the acclaimed Netflix series about a ruthless, vengeful congressman (Kevin Spacey), I decided to revisit two earlier big-screen peeks at life in the Capitol. One is a classic, the other even better today than when it first premiered.

And both were controversial.

Frank Capra’s Mr. Smith Goes to Washington opened on U.S. screens a month after the Nazi invasion of Poland in 1939.

However, the shadow of the European conflict is minimally referenced in the film, the major focus being on the political graft and corruption afflicting the U.S. toward the end of the Great Depression. In the role that made him a genuine star, James Stewart is Jefferson Smith, the freshman senator (and unwitting dupe) sent to Washington by the political machine running his unnamed state.

Ingenuous and innocent, a leader of the Boy Rangers (the Boy Scouts refused to lend their name to the film), Mr. Smith soon finds that the ideals and dreams of Abraham Lincoln and the statesman for whom he’s named have fallen prey to the machinations of moneyed interests. Backed by his secretary/girlfriend (Jean Arthur) and a boozy correspondent (Thomas Mitchell), Smith fights back with the most famous filibuster in film lore.

Though nominated for 11 Oscars in 1939 (the same fabulous Hollywood year of Gone with the Wind, Stagecoach and The Wizard of Oz), Capra’s film also generated some substantial criticism from government officials — among them Joseph P. Kennedy — who complained that the film was unAmerican in its depiction of corruption, a claim that seems ludicrous today (and probably did back then, to discriminating viewers) given that Smith (linked at times in the film to both Don Quixote and Jesus Christ) ultimately prevails.

Based on a 1959 Pulitzer Prize-winning novel, Advise & Consent (1962) was directed

by Otto Preminger, a filmmaker whose name, unlike Capra’s, was synonymous with controversy. In earlier ’50s films like The Moon Is Blue,The Man with the Golden Arm and Anatomy of a Murder, Preminger deliberately challenged (and overcame) longstanding taboos about movie content. Advise & Consent was about power politics (nothing new there) with an important subplot regarding homosexuality (a definite no-no in ’62).

More than just another assault on censorship, however, Advise & Consent is a riveting examination of powerful government officials, including the president and vice president, in conflict over the selection of a polarizing secretary of state during the Cold War. Featuring knockout performances by a stunning cast (headlined by Henry Fonda, Walter Pidgeon and Charles Laughton, who nearly stole the show in this final film), Advise & Consent is intelligent and provocative without the sentimental Capra-corn of its more distinguished predecessor. Not to slight the classic Mr. Smith, which is overtly amusing and more fantasy than not, Advise & Consent is about real people — neither good guys or bad guys, but everyone in between — trying each in his own way to do the right thing and succeeding only at great cost to not a few.

Now I’m primed for more House of Cards, with all its 21st-century innuendo and intrigue.

Pat McLeod mail@folioweekly.com

INTERNATIONAL ART THIEVES: A star-studded cast that includes John Goodman (from left), Matt Damon, George Clooney, Bob Balaban and Bill Murray, as well as Cate Blanchett, hasn’t saved The Monuments Men from receiving generally abysmal reviews worldwide. Photo: Sony

**** ***@ **@@ *@@@

FILM RATINGS

TINA FEY & AMY POEHLER ALEC BALDWIN & STEVE MARTIN BOB HOPE & THELMA RITTER JAMES FRANCO & ANNE HATHAWAY

OTHER FILMS

OSCAR-NOMINATED SHORT FILMS FESTIVAL The fourth annual festival is held Feb. 14-16 at Fernandina Little Theatre, 1014 Beech St.; $10 for one session, $30 for Early Bird, first two screenings on Sat. and Sun.; 277-2202, ameliaflt.org.

OSCAR SHORTS Oscar-nominated live action and animated shorts continue through Feb. 20 at Sun-Ray Cinema, 1028 Park St., 5 Points, 359-0049, sunraycinema.com.

HUMAN TRAFFICKING Not My Life runs at 7 p.m. Feb. 13, followed by a talk with survivors, in Jacksonville University’s Gooding Auditorium, 2800 University Blvd., 256-8000, ju.edu.

FROZEN ***G Rated PG Disney’s animated feature about sisters Princess Anna (Kristen Bell) and Queen Elsa (Idina Menzel), in this Golden Globe-winner.

GIMME SHELTER Rated PG-13 Vanessa Hudgens plays Agnes Bailey, pregnant and on the streets when her parents reject her. Thank God she meets a kind stranger. Co-stars Rosario Dawson, Brendan Fraser, James Earl Jones.

GRAVITY **** Rated PG-13 Medical engineer Sandra Bullock and veteran astronaut George Clooney are tethered together, making spaceship repairs, when they lose NASA contact.

LATITUDE 30 MOVIES Free Birds and The Hobbit 2 run at CineGrille, Latitude 30, 10370 Philips Highway, Southside.

365-5555.

HER ***G Rated R Director Spike Jonze asks what makes love real in this fantasy. Co-stars Joaquin Phoenix, Rooney Mara, Chris Pratt, Kristen Wiig and Scarlett Johansson’s disembodied voice, nearly as hot as the actual Johansson.

WORLD GOLF HALL OF FAME IMAX THEATER We the People, Great White Shark 3D, Tornado Alley 3D, To The Arctic 3D run at World Golf Hall of Fame Village IMAX Theater, 1 World Golf Place, St. Augustine, 940-IMAX, worldgolfimax.com.

THE HOBBIT: THE DESOLATION OF SMAUG ***@ Rated PG-13 Co-stars Martin Freeman, Orlando Bloom, Evangeline Lilly, Ian McKellen. Smaug is voiced by Benedict Cumberbatch.

NOW SHOWING

THE HUNGER GAMES: CATCHING FIRE ***G Rated PG-13 Katniss Everdeen (Jennifer Lawrence) is a warrior hero manipulated by Snow (Donald Sutherland). Co-stars Josh Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth, Woody Harrelson.

12 YEARS A SLAVE **** Rated R Chiwetel Ejiofor plays Solomon, a free black man in pre-Civil War New York who’s abducted and sold into slavery. Co-stars Brad Pitt, Michael Fassbender.

ABOUT LAST NIGHT Rated R • Opens Feb. 14 One-night stands may be fun, but this bunch takes the practice to the next level. Co-stars Kevin Hart, Michael Ealy, Regina Hall, Joy Bryant.

AMERICAN HUSTLE **G@ Rated R For con man Irving Rosenfeld (Christian Bale), working with the Feds is tougher than running cons. He helps the FBI (Bradley Cooper) nab corrupt public officials during Abscam.

Co-stars Amy Adams, Jennifer Lawrence.

AUGUST: OSAGE COUNTY ***@ Rated R The cast of director John Wells’ adaptation of Tracy Letts’ Pulitzer-winning story includes Meryl Streep as Violet, crusty matriarch of a family falling apart; Julia Roberts plays daughter Barbara. Margo Martindale as Violet’s sister and Chris Cooper as her brother-in-law stand out.

DEVIL’S DUE Rated R It’s kind of like Rosemary’s Baby, in that a woman is pregnant with, apparently, the spawn of The Adversary himself. Co-stars Allison Miller, Zach Gilford, Robert Belushi.

ENDLESS LOVE Rated PG-13 • Opens Feb. 14 Didn’t we just do this? Young, mismatched, lovestruck kids try to stay together when their mean old parents try to split them apart. Co-stars Gabriella Wilde, Alex Pettyfer, Bruce Greenwood. What, no Brooke Shields cameo?

I, FRANKENSTEIN Rated PG-13 The doctor’s creation is in the middle of a violent struggle between two immortal clans. So … not a fight to death, then. Co-stars Aaron Eckhart, Bill Nighy, Miranda Otto.

JACK RYAN: SHADOW RECRUIT Rated PG-13 Chris Pine stars as the young Ryan, just starting out on his CIA career. Co-stars Kevin Costner, Keira Knightley, Kenneth Branagh.

LABOR DAY *G@@ Rated PG-13 Kate Winslet is Adele, a depressed single mother, raising her earnest teenage son Henry (newcomer Gattlin Griffith). Adele and Henry are taken hostage by Frank Chambers (Josh Brolin), a wounded escaped killer. The kindly kidnapper does some home repairs, changes Adele’s oil (literally and euphemistically), teaches Henry to play catch – what a nice bad guy.

THE LEGEND OF HERCULES Rated PG-13 Kellan Lutz plays Greek demigod Hercules, who’s supposed to oust a bad king. Co-stars Gaia Weiss, Johnathan Schaech.

THE LEGO MOVIE ***@ Rated PG Reviewed in this issue.

LONE SURVIVOR Rated R Mark Wahlberg stars in this action/bio/drama based on actual events of a failed ’05 SEAL team mission. Co-stars Emile Hirsch, Taylor Kitsch.

THE MONUMENTS MEN Rated PG-13 George Clooney directs and stars in this fact-based film about a group of un-soldier types – think the opposite of The Dirty Dozen – museum curators, histroians and art experts who go into enemy territory during WWII to save thousands of stolen masterpieces from destruction by the Nazis.

Co-stars Matt Damon, Bill Murray, John Goodman and the adorable Bob Balaban.

NEBRASKA ***G Rated R Cranky Woody Grant (Bruce Dern) gets junk mail saying he’s won $1 million; he convinces his son David (Will Forte) to drive him to Lincoln, Neb., to claim the prize. Co-stars Stacy Keach, June Squibb.

THE NUT JOB Rated PG Will Arnett voices Surly, a rebellious squirrel banned from the park to roam the mean city streets. Co-stars the vocal cords of Brendan Fraser, Katherine Heigl, Jeff Dunham.

PHILOMENA **** Rated PG-13 Journalist Martin (Steve Coogan) needs to boost his career.

Philomena (Dame Judi Dench) wants to find the son she was forced to give up for adoption.

RIDE ALONG Rated PG-13 Kevin Hart is a smart-mouthed security guard engaged to Angela (Tika Sumpter) whose brother James (Ice Cube) is a cop. Co-stars John Leguizamo, Jay Pharoah.

ROBOCOP Rated PG-13 Futuristic tale of a police officer whose line-of-duty injuries call for new parts. Co-stars Joel Kinnaman, Gary Oldman, Michael Keaton, Abbie Cornish. Waitasec … is Keaton doing his Beetlejuice or Mr. Mom impression in this remake?

SAVING MR. BANKS ***@ Rated PG-13 P.L. Travers (Emma Thompson), who wrote Mary Poppins, goes to Walt Disney’s (Tom Hanks) L.A. studios to OK the book’s adaptation to fi lm.

THAT AWKWARD MOMENT Rated R Zac Efron, Michael B. Jordan and Miles Teller have hit that juncture where you either step up and commit … or not.

VAMPIRE ACADEMY Rated PG-13 Seriously? Hot girls in school uniforms, sucking blood?

Co-stars Gabriel Byrne, who ought to know better, and Joely Richardson, who’s a goddamn Redgrave, plus Zoey Deutch, Lucy Fry. WINTER’S TALE Rated PG-13 • Opens Feb. 14 A petty thief burgles a mansion and encounters a young girl as she dies. Somehow they become intertwined for life and beyond. Or before. It’s kinda iffy. Co-stars Colin Farrell, Jessica Brown Findlay, Russell Crowe, William Hurt.

THE WOLF OF WALL STREET ***G Rated R Hotshot stockbroker Jordan (Leonardo DiCaprio) has all that money can buy. Co-stars Jonah Hill, Kyle Chandler, Matthew McConaughey.

FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 17

A&E // MUSIC

Young Troubadour ADVERTISING PROOF Your new favorite singer-songwriter is a raspy-voiced

Aviles Restaurant at Hilton St. Augustine Historic Bayfront 32 Avenida Menendez, St. AugustineThis 829-2277 | hiltonhistoricstaugustine.net

is a copyright protected proof ©

19-year-old kid from Orlando

questions, please callinyour advertising representative at 260-9770.

Join us at theFor elegant Aviles Restaurant, located the Hilton Historic Bayfront, for MATTHEW FOWLER with LAKE DISNEY FAXsignature YOUR House PROOF IF POSSIBLEand ATSUBTERRANEAN 268-3655 a romantic Valentine’s Day. We are featuring our unique, Infused

OF BENEFIT

8 p.m. Feb. 15, Jack Rabbits, San Marco, $8, Cocktails, an extensive wine list and our Gourmet A La Carte Menu. Offerings include RUN DATE: 010814 398-7496, jaxlive.com a selection of fine aged prime steaks, fresh local seafood and chicken sure to satisfy your distinctive palate. Call and reserve your table today for the romantic evening in Produced by KAC Checked by Salesvery Reponce SS in a while, you hear something SUPPORT ASK FOR ACTION the Ancient City!

18 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

“E

that’s incredible.”

Steven Foxbury, he of the late-’90s Orlando pop-rock outfit My Friend Steve — a band best known for its 1998 semi-hit, “Charmed” — and a first-rate songwriter in his own right, is telling me how he came to manage ©Matthew 2014Fowler, an earnest, soulful, raspybut-sweet-voiced 19-year-old possessed of an indelible songwriting maturity and knack for melody, a kid compared most often to the likes of Damien Rice and Glen Hansard. Foxbury, you see, doesn’t manage bands — he never wanted to. There’s too much crap that goes along with it.

For the last few years, he’s been in Pittsburgh, running a recording studio. Last summer, he was in Orlando visiting family, when his brotherin-law’s sister’s daughter passed him a disc her friend Matthew had made (and for which she’d done the artwork). Foxbury didn’t think much of it. People pass him records all the time.

He got back to Pittsburgh, and put on Fowler’s self-produced and -recorded album, Beginning.

“It seriously stopped me in my tracks,” Foxbury says. “I listened to the whole thing, start to finish. It was” — he pauses, searching for the right word — “special. There is a magic” — another pause — “something in his music, his vision and the content of his songs.”

If you didn’t know Foxbury, if you didn’t know how preternaturally anti-PR-bullshit he is, you might assume he’s talking up his protégé in some hyperbolic, grandiose fashion, that he’s selling him. And then you’d listen to Beginning and realize how wrong you are. Foxbury’s not selling, he’s testifying. And then you’d learn that Fowler began writing these songs when he was 14 years old, and you can’t help but wonder what he’s going to sound like when he’s 24, or 34, when life experience catches up to his talent.

I first saw Fowler at a sort of comingout performance Foxbury arranged for a few dozen journalists and musician friends, at the home of Orlando folksinger Terri Binion. There was no mic, no lights, no stage, just Fowler and his guitar and voice and

harmonica. And he killed it — an impeccable, stunningly emotional performance.

Since then, Fowler’s seen his star begin to rise — playing bigger and better venues throughout Florida, drawing the attention of American Songwriter magazine, inking a deal with the artist promotion company Missing Piece Group (which also counts Rosanne Cash among its clients). Beginning is scheduled for a March 25 re-release (Fowler originally selfreleased the album the weekend he turned 19, and sold 1,000 actual CDs on his own in just a few months, not counting downloads).

Much like Fowler’s relationship with Foxbury, Beginning came together without much forethought. A buddy of Fowler’s asked him to play guitar for him on tour, and to open with his acoustic material. Fowler wanted to have something to sell. So he set up a makeshift studio in his parents’ kitchen.

“I just started gathering equipment from friends,” he says. The tracks were mostly cut live — guitar, piano, a little trumpet here and there. Textured, but minimalist, allowing his big, emotive voice to dominate. Beautiful in its simplicity. Occasionally leaning toward overwrought, but charmingly so.

Beginning’s “Don’t Change,” the first song Fowler ever wrote, is a very teenage rumination on friendship. “Near” conveys youthful love and longing, the kind that’s all-encompassing and all-possessing. “Beginners” is a quite-selfaware confession of inexperience and wonder. (“Though I’m scared we’re way too young/We will never say we’re dumb/’Cause tears of love and pain we’ll cry/We are beginners, you and I.”) None of these sentiments would feel out of place in, say, a show on The CW. Yet they’re masked in an aching world-weariness and well-thought-out arrangements that are at once sparse and lush.

And the songs, like their creator, are growing up. “A lot of the songs, they’re kind of vague in a way,” Fowler told me. “Even to me, some of the meanings have changed over the years. I can still assign any meaning I want to them.”

Fowler’s young, yes, but his is an old soul, and that permeates his songs. Or, as Foxbury puts it, “There’s a wisdom there well beyond his years.”

Jeffrey C. Billman jbillman@folioweekly.com

A&E // MUSIC CONCERTS THIS WEEK

BUDDY GUY & JONNY LANG 8 p.m. Feb. 12 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, $41-$81, 355-2787.

BIG SANDY & HIS FLY-RITE BOYS, THE CROWKEEPERS 8 p.m. Feb. 12 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $15, 398-7496.

THE PLURALS, BOOG 9 p.m. Feb. 12 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, $5, 353-4686.

CARRIE ASHLEY HILL, JACKSONVEGAS 9 p.m. Feb. 12 at Underbelly, 113 E. Bay St., Downtown, 353-6067.

DARLENE LOVE 8 p.m. Feb. 13 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, $36.50-$61.50, 355-2787.

SHOVELS & ROPE, SHAKEY GRAVES 8 p.m. Feb. 13 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $15, 398-7496.

NOBUNNY, THE HUSSY, GOLDEN PELICANS, QUEEN BEEF, TEENAGE LOBOTOMY 8 p.m. Feb. 13 at Shanghai Nobby’s, 10 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine, 547-2188.

BOOGIE FREAKS 9 p.m. Feb. 13 at Harmonious Monks, 10550 Old St. Augustine Rd., Mandarin, 880-3040.

ANTIQUE ANIMALS 10 p.m. Feb. 13 at Mellow Mushroom, 1018 Third St. N., Jax Beach, 997-1955.

LA FIN ABSOLUTE DU MONDE 8 p.m. Feb. 13 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, $5, 353-4686.

ROUGH MIX 8 p.m. Feb. 13, 7 p.m. Feb. 16 at Ragtime Tavern, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877.

KENNY LOGGINS 8 p.m. Feb. 14 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, $39.50-$75, 355-2787.

LISA & THE MAD HATTERS 9:30 p.m. Feb. 14-15 at Whitey’s Fish Camp, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198.

SHEBA “THE MISSISSIPPI QUEEN,� LITTLE MIKE & THE TORNADOES 7:30 p.m. Feb. 14 at Mudville Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., St. Nicholas, 352-7008.

BIG SKY, SEVEN NATIONS, FLAGSHIP ROMANCE 8 p.m. Feb. 14 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $15, 398-7496.

CITY BOI, DJ 2LIVE 8 p.m. Feb. 14 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $8, 246-2473.

GRANDPA’S COUGH MEDICINE, SNAKE BLOOD REMEDY, THE HOMESTEADERS, PILOTWAVE 8 p.m. Feb. 14 at 1904 Music Hall, 19 N. Ocean St., Downtown, $10.

AURA MUSIC & ARTS FESTIVAL: Lotus, Papadosio, Conspirator, Zoogma, The Werks, The Revivalists, Particle, The Heavy Pets, Future Rock, Marco Benevento, Mike Dillon Band, Kung Fu, Dopapod, Superhuman Happiness, Cope, Earphunk, Juno What?!, Twiddle, Jimkata, Stokeswood, The Resolvers, Lucky Costello, Catfish Alliance, Lather Up!, Pigeons Playing Ping Pong, Fat Mannequin, Displace, Spontaneous Underground, Polyester Pimpstrap Feb. 14-16 at Spirit of the Suwannee Music Park, 3076 95th Dr., Live Oak, $155-$325, 386-364-1683.

THE IRISH ROVERS 8 p.m. Feb. 15 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, $31.50-$41.50, 355-2787.

START MAKING SENSE: Talking Heads Tribute, Michael Cronin Band 8 p.m. Feb. 15 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $12, 246-2473.

ENGLAND IN 1819, FOUR FAMILIES, ROBIN RUTENBURG, SHONI 8 p.m. Feb. 15 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, $5, 353-4686.

WHETHERMAN 7:30 p.m. Feb. 15 at Mudville Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., St. Nicholas, 352-7008.

GRINGO STAR, GOOD GRAEFF 9 p.m. Feb. 15 at Underbelly, 113 E. Bay St., Downtown, 353-6067.

OSCAR MIKE, DIG DOG 8 p.m. Feb. 15 at 1904 Music Hall, 19 N. Ocean St., Downtown, $10.

LAKE DISNEY, SAM GOODWILL, SUBTERANNEAN, MATTHEW FOWLER 8 p.m. Feb. 15 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $8, 398-7496.

KALIYL, LASTWATCH 8 p.m. Feb. 15 at Murray Hill Theatre, 932 Edgewood Ave. S., Riverside, $10, 388-7807.

JAZZ ON THE BRIDGE: Ben Vereen, University of North Florida Jazz Performance Ensemble III, Gabriel Arnold, The Kelly/Scott Quintet 7 p.m. Feb. 15 at FSCJ’s Kent Campus, 393 Roosevelt Blvd., Northside, $50-$75, 354-7799 ext. 137.

MITCH KUHMAN BAND 9 p.m. Feb. 15 at World of Beer, 9700 Deer Lake Ct., Southside, free, 551-5929.

FreebirdLive.com

/ TU 4U +BY #FBDI '- r #*3%

FRIDAY FEBRUARY 14

CITY BOI Dj2Live SATURDAY FEBRUARY 15

START MAKING SENSE (TALKING HEADS TRIBUTE) MICHAEL CRONIN BAND WEDNESDAY FEBRUARY 19

THE EXPENDABLES

STICK FIGURE/SEEDLESS THURSDAY FEBRUARY 20

LOVE COMES EARLY: Singer and Rock & Roll Hall of Famer Darlene Love – known for “He’s a Rebel,� performances with Paul Shaffer & the CBS Symphony Orchestra and her role in the Lethal Weapon series – arrives on Valentine’s Eve (is that a real holiday?), Feb. 13, at The Florida Theatre in Downtown Jacksonville.

JUCIFER, PORTER 8 p.m. Feb. 16 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $8, 398-7496.

MASON JENNINGS, REBECCA PIDGEON, THE SWEETEST PUNCH 6:30 p.m. Feb. 16 at Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., Ponte Vedra Beach, $30, 209-0399.

TIM DAISY, MIKOAJ TRZASKA 7:30 p.m. Feb. 17 at Karpeles Museum, 101 W. First St., Springfield, 356-2992.

THAT 1 GUY 8 p.m. Feb. 17 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $10, 398-7496.

THE BEACH BOYS 8 p.m. Feb. 17 at The Florida Theatre, 128 E. Forsyth St., Downtown, $40.50-$67.50, 355-2787.

BRONZE RADIO RETURN, RED WANTING BLUE 8 p.m. Feb. 18 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $10, 398-7496.

TEACH ME EQUALS 8 p.m. Feb. 18 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, $5, 353-4686.

SOUTHERN CULTURE ON THE SKIDS, THE WOOLLY BUSHMAN 8 p.m. Feb. 19 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks

Ave., San Marco, $15, 398-7496.

THE EXPENDABLES, STICK FIGURE, SEEDLESS, DANKA 6 p.m. Feb. 19 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $20, 246-2473.

YOUNG THE GIANT 8 p.m. Feb. 19 at Mavericks at the Landing, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, $22, 356-1110.

THE MOBROS, PARKER URBAN BAND 9 p.m. Feb. 19 at Underbelly, 113 E. Bay St., Downtown, $5, 353-6067.

UV HIPPOS, LUMAGROVE 8 p.m. Feb. 19 at 1904 Music Hall, 19 N. Ocean St., Downtown, $7.

UPCOMING CONCERTS

THE TEMPTATIONS, THE FOUR TOPS Feb. 20, Florida Theatre SHPONGLE, DESERT DWELLERS Feb. 20, Freebird Live MELLOWDIME Feb. 20, Jack Rabbits TRACY GRAMMER, ANNIE & ROD CAPPS Feb. 20, Mudville Music Room

SHPONGLE

DESERT DWELLERS FRIDAY FEBRUARY 21

BEEBS & HER MONEYMAKERS WHOLE WHEAT BREAD SATURDAY FEBRUARY 22

KYMYSTRY

TOMMY HARRISON GROUP/ARTILECT SUNDAY FEBRUARY 23

TOUBAB KREWE SQUEEDLEPUSS THURSDAY FEBRUARY 27

Mon-

G. LOVE & SPECIAL SAUCE MEN’S NIGHT OUT Beer Pong 9pm Free Pool ALL U CAN EAT CRABLEGS

SOSOS

FRIDAY FEBRUARY 28

PRANAYAM/PRIMITIVE HARD DRIVE DENIED TIL DEATH/SLOW MOTION SUICIDE

Tues-

Texas Hold ’Em STARTS AT 7 P.M.

Wed-

HAPPY HOUR ALL NIGHT KIDS EAT FREE FROM 5 P.M. TO 9 P.M. BUY 10 WINGS GET 10 WINGS FREE 1/2 PRICED APPETIZERS (BAR ONLY) 5 P.M.-CLOSE

PHDRADIO.COM’S 1 YEAR B-DAY BASH

OPEN MIC NITE 9PM 1/2 PRICED DRINKS 10 P.M-12. A.M.

CAKED UP/SIR CHARLES

ThursFri-

SatSun-

SATURDAY MARCH 1

FULL DEVIL JACKET SUNDAY MARCH 2

BIG GIGANTIC WEDNESDAY MARCH 5

HOPSIN

LISA AND THE MAD HATTERS 9:30pm 1/2 PRICE APPS-FRI (BAR ONLY) 4-7PM DECK MUSIC 5 P.M.-9 P.M. LISA AND THE MAD HATTERS 9:30pm DECK MUSIC 5 P.M.-9 P.M. LIVE MUSIC 4:30-8:30pm

DJ HOPPA/LEGIT/DENVER UPCOMING

3-14: Tribal Seeds/New Kingston/Innavision 3-16:

We the Kings

3-27:

Drivin N Cryin

3-28:

Fortunate Youth/Sidereal

3-29:

Cultura Profetica

4-1:

All Time Low

4-5:

Slick Rick

4-12:

Dopapod/Greenhouse Lounge

4-17:

Local Natives

4-18:

Passafire

4-19:

Blessthefall/Silverstein

4-24:

Griz/Michal Menert

4-27:

Matt Still’s 2nd Sole Tour

5-19: The 1975

FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 19

A&E // MUSIC

NIGHT EYE

1

2

3

Ragtime Tavern & Seafood Grille

A

n Atlantic Beach staple for nearly 30 years, Ragtime Tavern & Seafood Grille keeps a party atmosphere and still manages to cater to the Old Beach crowd. Live music is featured nearly every night, and it’s always a great stop for bike-riding and day-drinking. Located in a former ice cream shop, Rags has a unique set-up: one-half of the joint is for live music and bar life, featuring brewed onsite craft beers, the other for dinner and cocktails.

Text/Photos: Abigail Wright, mail@folioweekly.com

1. Joe Duss and Cyris Khaki

20 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

2. Vinnie of Common Ground

NEW MADRID Feb. 20, Underbelly HONEY CHAMBER, GORILLA CANDY Feb. 20, Jack Rabbits JUICY J, TRAVI$ SCOTT, PROJECT PAT Feb. 20, Plush Nightclub TOMMY EMMANUEL, MARTIN TAYLOR Feb. 20-21, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE CRAZY DAYSIES Feb. 21, North Beach Bistro STEPHEN KELLOGG Feb. 21, Mudville Music Room MITCH KUHMAN BAND Feb. 21, Sangrias EL DUB Feb. 21, Dog Star Tavern JOHN BROWN’S BODY Feb. 21, Jack Rabbits PRIMER 55, STONE BONE, PIPESTONE, RULE NUMBER SIX, HANGMAN’S CROWN, ALL IN Feb. 21, Brewster’s Megaplex BEEBS AND HER MONEYMAKERS Feb. 21, Freebird Live HELIOS HAND, BONUS OCEANS Feb. 21, Burro Bar KILO-KAHN, DENIED TIL DEATH, APPALACHIAN DEATH TRAP, INNUENDO Feb. 21, 1904 Music Hall LEAH SYKES Feb. 21, Murray Hill Theatre DELBERT McCLINTON Feb. 22, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall IN WHISPERS, THE EMBRACED, ALL THINGS DONE Feb. 22, Jack Rabbits BRYCE ALASTAIR BAND, 100 WATT VIPERS, SUNSPOTS Feb. 22, 1904 Music Hall LOCAL BAND SHOWCASE & FLORIDA SOLO ARTIST AWARDS: Hammer On, The Greedy Lovers Feb. 22, Brewster’s Megaplex RHETT WALKER BAND Feb. 22, Murray Hill Theatre KYMYSTRY, TOMMY HARRISON GROUP Feb. 22, Freebird Live DARK STAR ORCHESTRA Feb. 23, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall SNARKY PUPPY Feb. 23, 1904 Music Hall TOUBAB KREWE Feb. 23, Freebird Live DIRE, NOTHING TO OFFER Feb. 23, Jack Rabbits DAVE MASON’S TRAFFIC JAM Feb. 23, The Florida Theatre GET RIGHT BAND Feb. 23, Fly’s Tie Irish Pub FOR TODAY, STRAY FROM THE PATH, THE PLOT IN YOU, LIKE MOTHS TO FLAMES, FIT FOR A KING Feb. 23, Brewster’s Megaplex JENNIFER NETTLES Feb. 25, The Florida Theatre GHOST FOOT Feb. 25, Burro Bar ABOLISH THE RELICS, EVERY MINUTE CAN KILL Feb. 25, Jack Rabbits THE EAGLES Feb. 26, Veterans Memorial Arena

3. Lounge and dining entrance

FILMSTRIP, GOVERNOR’S CLUB Feb. 26, Burro Bar NORMA JEAN, SPOKEN Feb. 26, Brewster’s Megaplex ASKMEIFICARE, SAMURAI SHOTGUN, WHISKEY FACE, DEAF TO THE INDUSTRY, MOSBY CLIQUE Feb. 26, Jack Rabbits UNKNOWN HINSON, GRANDPA’S COUGH MEDICINE Feb. 27, Jack Rabbits G. LOVE & SPECIAL SAUCE Feb. 27, Freebird Live THE CRAZY DAYSIES Feb. 27, Wipeouts Grill SAM PACETTI, WALTER PARKS Feb. 27, Mudville Music Room BEAUSOLEIL avec MICHAEL DOUCET Feb. 27, Café Eleven MATT OWEN & THE ELECTRIC TUBA Feb. 28, Jack Rabbits SOUTHSIDE JOHNNY & THE ASBURY JUKES Feb. 28, The Florida Theatre LOVE AND THEFT Feb. 28, Mavericks at the Landing ART GARFUNKEL Feb. 28, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall UNDERHILL ROSE Feb. 28, Mudville Music Room GET RIGHT BAND Feb. 28, White Lion JDILLA TRIBUTE Feb. 28, Underbelly SET APART, COME AND REST, ME AND THE TRINITY Feb. 28, Murray Hill Theatre CADELONIAN STRING BAND Feb. 28, Murray Hill Theatre Fringe Café THE CRAZY DAYSIES Feb. 28, Seven Bridges GREAT GUITAR GATHERING March 1, The Florida Theatre FULL DEVIL JACKET, NEW DAY March 1, Freebird Live BENJAMIN BOOKER March 1, Jack Rabbits THE UNDERHILL FAMILY ORCHESTRA March 1, Burro Bar LARRY MANGUM March 1, Mudville Music Room IRON AND WINE March 1, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall GET RIGHT BAND March 1, White Lion HERD OF WATTS, TRAE PIERCE & T-STONE BAND, LYDA BROTHERS BAND March 1, 1904 Music Hall JULIO IGLESIAS March 2, T-U Center’s Moran Theater BIG GIGANTIC, CAKED UP, SIR CHARLES March 2, Freebird Live ICE NINE KILLS, ABOLISH THE RELICS March 2, Brewster’s LOCAL H March 2, Jack Rabbits STILL THE SKY’S LIMIT March 3, Jack Rabbits ROUNDHEELS, GLEN MARTIN March 3, Burro Bar TWO COW GARAGE March 4, Jack Rabbits THE DYLAN TAYLOR BAND March 4, Underbelly HOPSIN, DJ HOPPA, FUNK VOLUME March 5, Freebird Live

SPIRITUAL REZ & THE MESSENGERS March 5, Underbelly FRANKIE VALLI & THE FOUR SEASONS March 5, T-U Center HE IS LEGEND, ON GUARD March 5, 1904 Music Hall SURFER BLOOD March 5, Jack Rabbits THE KENNEDYS March 6, Mudville Music Room CAROLINA CHOCOLATE DROPS March 6, P.V. Concert Hall DROPKICK MURPHYS, LUCERO, SKINNY LISTER March 6, Mavericks at the Landing DARSOMBRA, NATIONAL DIARY March 6, Burro Bar GENERAL TSO’S FURY, ASKULTURA March 6, Jack Rabbits MATRIMONY March 8, Jack Rabbits AMY SPEACE March 8, Mudville Music Room STEVE MILLER BAND March 8, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE REPUBLIK March 8, Underbelly WARRIOR KING & THE ONE SOUND BAND, DE LIONS OF JAH, JAH ELECT & THE I QUALITY BAND, KANA KIEHM, 74 SOUNDSYSTEM March 8, Freebird Live LEVERAGE MODELS, WOVEN IN, THE HIGHWAY March 8, Burro Bar ALESANA, GET SCARED, HEARTS & HANDS, FAREWELL MY LOVE, MEGOSH March 9, Brewster’s Megaplex AGENT ORANGE March 9, Jack Rabbits SCOTTY McCREERY March 9, The Florida Theatre CURTIN March 10, Burro Bar BOBAFLEX March 11, Brewster’s Megaplex LES RACQUET, THE ACCOMPLICES, WORTH ROAD March 12, Jack Rabbits TRIBAL SEEDS, STICK FIGURE, SEEDLESS March 13, Freebird Live PIERCE PETTIS March 13, The Original Café Eleven DANA COOPER March 13, Mudville Music Room HARPETH RISING, HONEY BOY, BOOTS March 14, Mudville Music Room MICHAEL BOLTON March 14, The Florida Theatre OSCAR MIKE, BETHANY STOCKDALE March 14, Jack Rabbits TOOTS LORRAINE & THE TRAFFIC March 15, Mudville Music Room GRAVITY A, SPORE March 15, Underbelly WE THE KINGS, THIS CENTURY, CRASH THE PARTY March 16, Freebird Live LA DISPUTE March 16, Brewster’s Megaplex NATURAL LIFE MUSIC FESTIVAL: Larkin Poe, HoneyHoney, The Autumn Defense, Sarah Jarosz, Della Mae March 16, Metropolitan Park REDRICK SULTAN March 17, Burro Bar GEORGE THOROGOOD & THE DESTROYERS March 19, The Florida Theatre WE BUTTER THE BREAD WITH BUTTER, LIONS LIONS, HONOUR CREST March 19, Jack Rabbits HIROYA TSUKAMOTO, SAM PACETTI, MICHAEL JORDAN March 20, Mudville Music Room SUWANNEE SPRINGFEST: The Avett Brothers, Del McCoury Band, Punch Brothers, Sam Bush Band, Southern Soul Assembly, Jason Isbell, Travelin’ McCoury Jam, Donna the Buffalo, Steep Canyon Rangers, Jim Lauderdale, Greensky Bluegrass, Willie Sugarcaps, The Duhks, Aoife O’Donovan, Floodwood, Ralph Roddenbery, Grandpa’s Cough Medicine, Whetherman, Canary in the Coalmine, The Royal Tinfoil, Holy Ghost Tent Revival, Love Canon, Grant Peeples, The Stacks, Sloppy Joe, Uproot Hootenanny, Big Cosmo, Habanera Honeys, Tammerlin, The New 76ers, JacksonVegas, Quartermoon, James Justin & Co., Rosco Bandana, SOSOS, The Whiskey Gentry, Bibb City Ramblers, 2-Foot Level, Henhouse Prowlers, Come Back Alice, Gypsy Wind, Nook & Cranny, Beartoe, Mickey Abraham’s Acoustic Ensemble March 20-23, Spirit of the Suwannee Music Park MOULLINEX, MARBEYA SOUND March 21, Underbelly MIDDLE CLASS RUT, BRICK & MORTAR, DINOSAUR PILEUP March 21, Jack Rabbits PINK MARTINI March 21, The Florida Theatre JOSHUA SCOTT JONES, JORDYN STODDARD March 21, The Original Café Eleven LADYSMITH BLACK MAMBAZO March 22, Florida Theatre BATTLEFIELD BAND March 22, Mudville Music Room WE ARE THE IN CROWD, WILLIAM BECKETT, SET IT OFF, STATE CHAMPS, CANDY HEARTS March 22, Jack Rabbits THE MOODY BLUES March 22, St. Augustine Amphitheatre MARY OCHER March 22, Burro Bar MARC COHN DUO March 23, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE DEVIL WEARS PRADA, THE GHOST INSIDE, I KILLED THE PROM QUEEN, DANGERKIDS March 23, Murray Hill Theatre THE TURNPIKE TROUBADOURS March 24, Jack Rabbits THE SUITCASE JUNKET March 25, Underbelly DOC HANDY March 25, Mudville Music Room DAVE HAUSE, NORTHCOTE March 26, Jack Rabbits DANGERMUFFIN March 26, 1904 Music Hall GET THE LED OUT March 27, The Florida Theatre JOHN FLYNN March 27, Mudville Music Room DIRTY BOURBON RIVER SHOW March 27, Underbelly DRIVIN N CRYIN’ March 27, Freebird Live YOUR 33 BLACK ANGELS March 27, Burro Bar THE BRONX WANDERERS March 28, Thrasher-Horne Center KB March 28, Murray Hill Theatre FORTUNATE YOUTH March 28, Freebird Live LORETTA LYNN March 28, The Florida Theatre PROTEST THE HERO, BATTLECROSS, SAFETY FIRE, INTERVALS, NIGHT/VERSUS March 28, Jack Rabbits RUFFIANS, SUNSPOTS March 28, Burro Bar GORAN IVANOVIC March 28, The Original Café Eleven STILL ON THE HILL March 29, Mudville Music Room SLIDE INTO SPRING MUSIC & CRAFT BEER FESTIVAL March 29, Fernandina Beach CULTURA PROFETICA March 29, Freebird Live

A&E // MUSIC 2 CHAINZ March 29, Brewster’s Megaplex RIVERS AND LAKES March 30, Jack Rabbits CARRIE NATION & THE SPEAKEASY, MUDTOWN, TAIL LIGHT REBELLION March 30, Burro Bar THE FUNERAL AND THE TWILIGHT, BURNT HAIR, PROSTRATE, VASES March 31, Burro Bar ALL TIME LOW, MAN OVERBOARD, HAND GUNS April 1, Freebird Live STEVE HACKETT April 2, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall MOBB DEEP April 2, Underbelly TESSERACT April 2, Brewster’s Megaplex JESSE COOK April 3, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall PEPPINO DEAUGUSTINO April 3, Mudville Music Room PAUL ANKA April 3, T-U Center’s Moran Theater T. MILLS April 3, Brewster’s Megaplex SOJA April 3, The Florida Theatre SPRINGING THE BLUES FESTIVAL April 4-6, Jax Beach ROBERT CRAY BAND April 4, P.V. Concert Hall GRANT PEEPLES April 5, Mudville Music Room THOMAS WYNN & THE BELIEVERS, THE IVEY WEST BAND April 5, Underbelly SOUTH EAST BEAST April 5-6, Brewster’s Megaplex AMOS LEE April 7, The Florida Theatre WANEE MUSIC FESTIVAL: The Allman Brothers Band, Trey Anastasio Band, Lynyrd Skynyrd, Tedeschi Trucks Band, Gov’t Mule, Jaimoe’s Jasssz Band, Umphrey’s McGee, Ziggy Marley, Blues Traveler, The Chris Robinson Brotherhood, Hot Tuna Electric, moe., Rusted Root, Ivan Neville’s Dumpstaphunk, Soulive, Royal Southern Brotherhood, Walter Trout, Rob Garza (Thievery Corporation), Blind Boys of Alabama, Bobby Lee Rodgers, Melvin Seals & JGB, Futurebirds, Matt Schofield, Break Science, Sean Chambers, The Yeti Trio April 10-12, Spirit of the Suwannee Music Park THE BLIND BOYS OF ALABAMA April 11, P.V. Concert Hall MIKE EPPS April 11, T-U Center RAY WYLIE HUBBARD, THE 77D’S April 12, Jack Rabbits WHITE FANG, DENNEY & THE JETS, THE MOLD April 12, Burro Bar JON VEZNER April 13, Mudville Music Room THE ZOMBIES April 13, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall THE VALLEY ROOTS April 14, Underbelly LOCAL NATIVES April 17, Freebird Live MITCH KUHMAN BAND April 17, Sangrias CONSIDER THE SOURCE April 18, Underbelly TECH N9NE April 18, Brewster’s THE RESOLVERS, UNIVERSAL GREEN, THE MESSENGERS April 19, Underbelly MERCYGIRL, WHOSOEVER SOUTH April 19, Murray Hill Theatre

Mon: Karaoke Tues: Karaoke Wed: Jam Nite / Open Mic

Heavy Hitters Club Host Band Synrgy Featuring Rocco Marshall, Derek Hess, Clinton Carver, Rick “Hurricane� Johnson and other special guests. That means you.

8:30 pm

Thurs: Karaoke/Boogie Freaks Fri: Home of the Most Talented

Wait Staff Show begins 9pm till close

BLESSTHEFALL, SILVERSTEIN, THE AMITY AFFLICTION, SECRETS, HEARTIST April 19, Freebird Live DARIUS RUCKER, ELI YOUNG BAND, COREY SMITH April 19, St. Augustine Amphitheatre SLAID CLEAVES April 19, Mudville Music Room MISHKA, SARAH BLACKER April 20, Jack Rabbits REHAB April 22, Jack Rabbits VANCE GILBERT April 24, Mudville Music Room LARRY MANGUM April 26, Mudville Music Room WELCOME TO ROCKVILLE: Avenged Sevenfold, The Cult, Motorhead, Volbeat, Chevelle, Alter Bridge, Hellyeah, Adelitas Way, Rev Theory, Butcher Babies, Memphis May Fire, Chiodos, We as Human, Monster Truck, We Came as Romans, Middle Class Rut, Devour the Day April 26, Metropolitan Park WELCOME TO ROCKVILLE: Korn, Rob Zombie, Five Finger Death Punch, Staind, Seether, Theory of a Deadman, Black Label Society, Black Stone Cherry, Trivium, Motionless in White, Sick Puppies, Skindred, The Pretty Reckless, Lacuna Coil, Fozzy, Kyng, Nothing More, Twelve Foot Ninja April 27, Metropolitan Park ANTIQUE ANIMALS April 27, Mellow Mushroom Jax Beach SANTANA April 27, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ROB THOMAS April 29, The Florida Theatre JOHN LEGEND April 30, The Florida Theatre SUWANNEE RIVER JAM: Brantley Gilbert, Montgomery Gentry, The Mavericks, Chris Cagle, Justin Moore, The Charlie Daniels Band, Colt Ford, The Lacs, JJ Lawhorn April 30-May 3, Spirit of the Suwannee Music Park BRIT FLOYD May 4, The Florida Theatre CHER, CYNDI LAUPER May 14, Veterans Memorial Arena TURKUAZ May 7, Underbelly COMBICHRIST May 8, Brewster’s Megaplex THE FAB FOUR May 9, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall PURPLE HATTER’S BALL: Beats Antique, Emancipator Ensemble, The New Mastersounds, The Heavy Pets, The Nth Power, DubConscious, Space Capone, Rising Appalachia, Greenhouse Lounge May 9-11, Suwannee Music Park BEGGAR’S RIDE, MARK MANDEVILLE, RAIANNE RICHARDS May 10, Mudville Music Room YOU KNEW ME WHEN May 13, Underbelly CHER May 14, Veterans Memorial Arena WOODY PINES May 15, Underbelly GLADYS KNIGHT May 16, T-U Center THE 1975 May 19, Freebird Live JACK JOHNSON, ALO May 20, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ANTIQUE ANIMALS May 22, Mellow Mushroom Jax Beach STYX, FOREIGNER, DON FELDER May 23, St. Augustine Amphitheatre

SONGWRITER’S CIRCLE ANNIVERSARY: Larry Mangum, Mike Shackelford, Jamie DeFrates June 7, Mudville Music Room FLORIDA COUNTRY SUPERFEST: Luke Bryan, Jason Aldean, Eric Church, Miranda Lambert, Florida Georgia Line, Little Big Town, Big & Rich, Easton Corbin, Colt Ford, Joe Nichols June 14-15, EverBank Field MERCYGIRL, WHOSOEVER SOUTH June 21, Murray Hill Theatre DAVE MATTHEWS BAND July 15, Veterans Memorial Arena FALL OUT BOY, NEW POLITICS July 27, St. Augustine Amphitheatre MOTLEY CRUE, ALICE COOPER Oct. 19, Vets Memorial Arena

CLUBS AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH

DAVID’S RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, 802 Ash St., 310-6049 John Springer every Tue.-Wed. Aaron Bing every Fri.-Sat. DOG STAR TAVERN, 10 N. Second St., 277-8010 Working Class Stiff with real vinyl 9:30 p.m. every Tue. THE PALACE SALOON, 117 Centre St., 491-3332 Schnockered 9:30 p.m. Feb. 16. Buck Smith every Tue. THE SURF, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 491-8999 DJ Roc at 6 p.m. every Wed. Richard Smith 6 p.m. every Fri. Honey Badgers every Sat.

ARLINGTON, REGENCY

BREWSTER’S MEGAPLEX/PIT/ROC BAR/THE EDGE, 845 University Blvd. N., 223-9850 Primer 55, Stone Bone, Pipestone, Rule Number Six Feb. 21 MVP’S SPORTS GRILLE, 12777 Atlantic Blvd., 221-1090 Live music 9 p.m. every Fri.-Sat.

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

BLUE FISH, 3551 St. Johns Ave., 387-0700 Paul Haftel every other Fri. for Elevated Avondale CASBAH CAFE, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966 Goliath Flores every Wed. Live jazz every Sun. Live music every Mon. ECLIPSE, 4219 St. Johns Ave., 387-3582 DJ Keith every Tue. DJ Free every Fri. DJ SuZi-Rok every Mon.

BAYMEADOWS

COFFEE GRINDER, 9834 Old Baymeadows Rd., 642-7600 DJ Jenn Martinello Tue. DJ Allen Thur. DJ Mark Mallory Fri. MY PLACE BAR & GRILL, 9550 Baymeadows Rd., 737-5299 Herd of Watts 9:30 p.m. Feb. 15

WED.

Permission

THUR.

Rough Mix

FRI. & SAT. Cloud 9

SUN.

Rough Mix Atlantic Blvd. at the Ocean "UMBOUJD #FBDI r

FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 21

A&E // MUSIC BEACHES

(All venues in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted) 200 FIRST STREET, Courtyard, Neptune Beach, 249-2922 Tim Franklin 7 p.m. Feb. 14. Misha Frayman Feb. 15 CULHANE’S IRISH PUB, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-9595 Suit Up Jazz Feb. 14 FLYING IGUANA, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680 3 the Band 10 p.m. Feb. 14. Parkerurban Band 8:30 p.m. Feb. 15. Red Beard & Stinky E 10 p.m. every Thur.

FLY’S TIE IRISH PUB, 177 E. Sailfish Dr., Atlantic Beach, 246-4293 Wes Cobb every Thur. Charlie Walker every Mon. FREEBIRD LIVE, 200 N. First St., 246-2473 City Boi, DJ 2Live Feb. 14. Start Making Sense: Talking Heads Tribute Feb. 15. The Expendables, Stick Figure, Seedless, Danka Feb. 19.

Shpongle, Desert Dwellers Feb. 20 ISLAND GIRL CIGAR BAR, 108 First St., Neptune Beach, 372-0943 Paul Miller Feb. 13. Mark O’Quinn Feb. 14. Jason Ivey Feb. 15. Clayton Bush Feb. 20. Chelsea Saddler Feb. 21.

Paxton Stark Feb. 22 LANDSHARK CAFE, 1728 Third St. N., 246-6024 Open mic every Wed. Matt Still every Thur.

MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1018 N. Third St., 246-1500 Ryan Crary Feb. 12. Antique Animals Feb. 13 MEZZA LUNA, 110 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-5573 Neil Dixon every Tue. Mike Shackelford & Rick Johnson every Thur.

MOJO KITCHEN, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636 Anna Popvic 10 p.m. Feb. 15 NORTH BEACH BISTRO, 725 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 372-4105 Kurt Lanham Feb. 13. Neil Dixon Feb. 14. Billy Bowers 7:30 p.m. Feb. 15 PIER CANTINA, 412 N. First St., 246-6454 Ryan Campbell & Charlie Walker every Fri. Split Tone every Sun. RAGTIME TAVERN, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877 Permission 7 p.m. Feb. 12. Rough Mix Feb. 13 & 16. Cloud 9 at 9 p.m. Feb. 14-15 THE SHIM SHAM ROOM, 333 First St. N., 372-0781 Live acoustic 10 p.m. every Mon.

DOWNTOWN

1904 MUSIC HALL, 19 Ocean St. N. Grandpa’s Cough Medicine, Snake Blood Remedy, The Homesteaders, Pilotwave Feb. 14. Oscar Mike, Dig Dog Feb. 15. UV Hippos, Lumagrove Feb. 19 BURRO BAR, 100 E. Adams St., 677-2977 Boog, The Plurals 9 p.m. Feb. 12. La Fin Absolute du Monde 8 p.m. Feb. 13.

England in 1819, Four Families, Shoni 8 p.m. Feb. 15. Tech Me Equals 8 p.m. Feb. 18 DOS GATOS, 123 E. Forsyth St., 354-0666 DJ NickFresh 9 p.m. every Sat. FIONN MacCOOL’S, Jax Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1247

Braxton Adamson 5-8 p.m., Chris C4 Mann 8:30 p.m. Feb. 14. Chuck Nash Duo 8:30 p.m. Feb. 15. Braxton Adamson 5-8 p.m., Rathkeltair and Albanach 8:30 p.m. Feb. 21 JACKSONVILLE LANDING, 2 Independent Dr., 353-1188 Cupid’s Alley 6-10 p.m. Feb. 13. Radio 80 8 p.m.-1 a.m. Feb. 15. Sun Jammer 8 p.m.-1 a.m. Feb. 22. Live music every Fri.-Sat. MARK’S DOWNTOWN, 315 E. Bay St., 355-5099 DJ Roy Luis 9 p.m. every Wed. DJ Vinn every Thur. DJ 007 every Fri. Bay Street 9 p.m. every Sat. MAVERICKS, Jax Landing, 2 Independent Dr., 356-1110 Young the Giant 8 p.m. Feb. 19. Joe Buck, Big Tasty spin every Thur.-Sat. SHANTYTOWN PUB, 22 W. Sixth St., 798-8222 Hudson Falcon Feb. 15. Ken South Rock Feb. 16. Some Kind of Nightmare Feb. 17. Bethany Stockdale 8 p.m. Feb. 21 UNDERBELLY, 113 E. Bay St., 353-6067 Carrie Ashley Hill, JacksonVegas 9 p.m. Feb. 12. Gringo Star, Good Graeff Feb. 15. The Mobros, Parker Urban Band Feb. 19.

FLEMING ISLAND

MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1800 Town Center Blvd., 541-1999 Jim Essery 10 p.m. Feb. 14. 7 Street Band Feb. 15 WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198 Tony Paul Neal 5 p.m. Feb. 14. Lisa & the Mad Hatters at 9:30 p.m. Feb. 14-15. Dan Voll 5 p.m. Feb. 15. Deck music at 5 p.m. every Fri.-Sat., 4:30 p.m. every Sun. DJ BG every Mon.

INTRACOASTAL WEST

CLIFF’S BAR & GRILL, 3033 Monument Rd., 645-5162 Big Baby Live 8 p.m. Feb. 14. Black Creek Rizin Feb. 15 JERRY’S SPORTS GRILLE, 13170 Atlantic Blvd., 220-6766 Live music every Fri.-Sat. SALSA’S MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 13500 Beach Blvd., 992-8402 Live guitar music 6-9 p.m. every Tue. & Sat.

MANDARIN, JULINGTON

HARMONIOUS MONKS, 10550 Old St. Augustine Rd., 880-3040 Boogie Freaks Feb. 13. Open mic: Synergy 8 p.m. every Wed. Dennis Klee & the World’s Most Talented Waitstaff 9 p.m. every Fri. RACK ’EM UP, 4268 Oldfield Crossing Dr., 262-4030 DJ Randall every Sun. & Wed.

ORANGE PARK, MIDDLEBURG

THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Rd., 272-5959 John Michael Wed.-Sat. PREVATT’S SPORTS BAR, 2620 Blanding Blvd., 282-1564 DJ Tammy 9 p.m. every Wed. THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611 Fratello 9 p.m. Feb. 14-15. Live music 9 p.m. every Thur.-Sat.

PALATKA

DOWNTOWN BLUES BAR & GRILLE, 714 St. Johns Ave., 386-325-5454 River City Bluez Band 8:30 p.m. Feb. 14

PONTE VEDRA, PALM VALLEY

ISLAND GIRL CIGAR BAR, 820 A1A N., 834-2492 Kevin Ski Feb. 13. Paxton Stark Feb. 14. Caleb Joye Feb. 15. John Austill Feb. 20. Aaron Kyle Feb. 21. Ledbedder Feb. 22 PUSSER’S GRILLE, 816 A1A N., 280-7766 Live music every Fri.-Sat. SoundStage Sun. TABLE 1, 330 A1A N., Ste. 208, 280-5515 Darren Corlew 6 p.m. Feb. 12. Gary Starling Jazz Band Feb. 13. WillowWacks Feb. 15

RIVERSIDE, WESTSIDE

KICKBACKS, 910 King St., 388-9551 Ray & Taylor 8:30 p.m. every Thur. Robby Shenk every Sun. MURRAY HILL THEATRE, 932 Edgewood Ave. S., 388-7807 Kaliyl, Lastwatch, Nocturnal State of Mind 8 p.m. Feb. 15

ST. AUGUSTINE

CELLAR UPSTAIRS, 157 King St., 826-1594 Rick Levy & the Falling Bones 7-11 p.m. Feb. 14. Brady Reich 2-5 p.m., Chillula 7-11 p.m. Feb. 15. Vinny Jacobs 2-5 p.m. Feb. 16 HARRY’S, 46 Avenida Menendez, 824-7765 Billy Bowers 6 p.m. Feb. 12 MILL TOP TAVERN & LISTENING ROOM, 19 1/2 St. George St., 829-2329 Mike Hart Trio 9 p.m. Feb. 14-15. John Winters 1 p.m. Feb. 16. Todd & Molly Jones every Wed. Aaron Esposito every Thur. David Strom every Mon. Donny Brazile Tue. SHANGHAI NOBBY’S, 10 Anastasia Blvd., 547-2188 Nobunny, The Hussy, Golden Pelicans, Queen Beef, Teenage Lobotomy 7:30 p.m. Feb. 13 TRADEWINDS, 124 Charlotte St., 829-9336 Those Guys 9 p.m. Feb. 14-15. Matanzas Sun.-Thur. Elizabeth Roth Sat.

ST. JOHNS TOWN CENTER

BLACKFINN GRILLE, 4840 Big Island Dr., 345-3466 Live music 5 p.m. every Wed., 9 p.m. every Thur.-Sat. SUITE, 4880 Big Island Dr., 493-9305 Live music Fri.-Sat.

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK

JACK RABBITS, 1528 Hendricks Ave., 398-7496 Big Sandy & His Fly-Rite Boys, The Crowkeepers 8 p.m. Feb. 12. Shovels & Rope, Shakey Graves 8 p.m. Feb. 13. Big Sky, Seven Nations, Flagship Romance 8 p.m. Feb. 14. Lake Disney, Sam Goodwill, Subterranean, Matthew Fowler 8 p.m. Feb. 15. Jucifer, Porter 8 p.m. Feb. 16. That 1 Guy Feb. 17. Bronze Radio Return, Red Wanting Blue Feb. 18. Southern Culture on the Skids, Wooly Bushman Feb. 19. Honey Chamber, Gorilla Candy Feb. 20 MUDVILLE MUSIC ROOM, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., 352-7008 Linda Grenville, Cindy Bear, Mary Ann Hawkins 7:30 p.m.

Feb. 12. Sheba “The Mississippi Queen,” Little Mike & The Tornadoes 7:30 p.m. Feb. 14. Whetherman 7:30 p.m. Feb. 15

SOUTHSIDE

ISLAND GIRL, 7860 Gate Pkwy., Ste. 115, 854-6060 Tad Jennings Feb. 13. Matt Collins Feb. 14. Billy Buchanan Feb. 15. Jason Ivey Feb. 20. Bill Rice Feb. 21 LATITUDE 30, 10370 Philips Hwy., 365-5555 VJ Didactic 9 p.m. Feb. 13. Boogie Freaks 9 p.m. Feb. 14-15 SEVEN BRIDGES, 9735 Gate Parkway N., 997-1999 Live music Fri.-Sat. TAVERNA YAMAS, 9753 Deer Lake Ct., 854-0426 DJ at 8 p.m. every Fri.-Sat. WILD WING CAFE, 4555 Southside Blvd., 998-9464 Chilly Rhino Feb. 13. Lyons Feb. 14. Pop Muzik & Chilly Rhino rotate 7 p.m. every Wed. WORLD OF BEER, 9700 Deer Lake Ct., Ste. 1, 551-5929 Mitch Kuhman Band Feb. 15

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

DAMES POINT MARINA, 4542 Irving Rd., 751-3043 Live music every Fri.-Sat. HIGHWAY 17 ROADHOUSE TAVERN, 850532 U.S. 17, Yulee, 225-9211 Live music every Fri.-Sat.

22 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

A&E // MUSIC

Photo: Fresh & Clean Media

On His Own Wavelength

Literate lyricism and a singular voice allow this Minnesota singer-songwriter to create a niche MASON JENNINGS with REBECCA PIDGEON and THE SWEETEST PUNCH 6:30 p.m. Feb. 16, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, Ponte Vedra Beach, $28 in advance; $30 day of show, 209-0399, pvconcerthall.com

T

o many casual music fans, Mason Jennings has always operated in the shadow of surffolk superstar Jack Johnson. Sure, they’re good friends and have toured and recorded together on and off since 2001, but being lumped in with Johnson does Jennings a huge disservice.

For starters, though 38-year-old Jennings was born in Hawaii, he grew up in Pittsburgh and has lived in Minneapolis for nearly 20 years.

“I went surfing once with Jack,” he said with a laugh during a recent interview. “And I couldn’t stand up on the board or anything.”

Second, although Jennings’ singer-songwriter persona is breezy and easygoing, the breadth of his work far outpaces that of the genteel Johnson.

In 17 years, Jennings has recorded and released more than 15 albums of literate, incisive folkrock that run the gamut from political (“Black Panther”) to personal (“Ballad for My One True Love”), dogmatic (“I Love You and Buddha Too”) to devastating (“Jackson Square”), precious (“Butterfly”) to penetrating (“The Flood”).

Yet all of Jennings’ songs share one attribute: emotional honesty. “I have to really feel the core of each song in my own chest,” he admits.

“Otherwise, it’s going to feel fake to me. I’m never consciously thinking, ‘I’ll write a story.’ At the time I’m writing a song, I’m in it. I’m part of it. Even if it’s not necessarily true.”

Nothing in Jennings’ discography, which stretches from 1997’s rough-hewn self-titled debut to last year’s polished Always Been, feels disingenuous. Some songs begin by landing sucker punches like “This is a bullet from a gun called what the fuck”; others start with intoxicating decorum like “Dawn breaks across our little room/You’re sleeping silently and still.”

Yet the one straight line that runs through all of it is Jennings’ impressive voice.

Blessed with agile athleticism bouncing from smooth croon to streetwise beat to aw-shucks talking blues, few voices as effortless as his exist today. It doesn’t matter if you pore over Jennings’ early home-recorded demos or his recent studioadorned albums — once you hear that voice oozing like honey one moment and turning sharp corners the next, you’ll never forget it. Jennings knows it, too. He named his ’04 album Use Your Voice, and relinquished self-recording and producing control to Bo Ramsey for ’13’s Always Been specifically to lend weight to his vocals.

“Melodies and lyrics come naturally to me, but I’m always striving to get better at my vocals,” he says. “I tend to gravitate toward singers whose words really jump out.

Everybody’s given a voice, but I can’t do what Robert Plant does. So I’m just trying to find my own way of communicating.”

Nearly 20 years into his career, Jennings has surely struck upon such singularity. Performing solo allows him complete creative control — and the ability to fly in and out of long weekend tours so he can be home during the week with his wife and two young sons. A dedicated fan base affords him the freedom to jump from labels as diverse as Modest Mouse frontman Isaac Brock’s Glacial Pace imprint to Jack Johnson’s Brushfire Records family to Nashville’s hands-off distribution firm Thirty Tigers.

Those attributes, along with a genial, regularguy bearing, have allowed Jennings to build a sustainable, stimulating career focused primarily on craft, creativity and personal fulfillment.

“I always knew music would be something I’d do my whole life,” he says. “I didn’t expect computers and the Internet and cellphones to happen like they have; things don’t look like I thought they were going to look, and I’ve never gotten to the spot where every venue is the same. But the biggest thing for me is staying connected to the joy of making music. What can light my spark? The songs always come first, and they always have to come from that creative spirit.”

Sounds pretty hippie-dippie, huh? Jennings’ music certainly resonates with what he calls the “simplicity and similar appreciation of nature” employed by Jack Johnson and his merry brand of surf-folkies. But Mason Jennings is concerned with more than just good vibes for good vibes’ sake. In March, he’ll discuss the intersection of peace and creativity at the Nobel Peace Prize Forum in Minnesota, just missing the chance to speak on the same day as the Dalai Lama. (Dad of the Year Award alert: Jennings told the Nobel folks he wouldn’t take the gig unless his kids could see His Holiness).

Beyond that? When asked if he plans on retreating to the same rural cabin where he wrote last year’s Always Been to start working on new material, Jennings chuckles. “I actually sold that cabin. Every time I finish a record, I have to disconnect — make sure things change and go through a process of looking at what’s actually interesting in life. After all this time, the last thing I want to do is repeat myself.”

Nick McGregor mail@folioweekly.com FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 23

A&E // INTERVIEW

‘The General History of Florida Is Corrupt’

Historian T.D. Allman challenges the many myths of the Sunshine State – including its discovery tale T.D. ALLMAN The BookMark, Neptune Beach, 7 p.m. Feb. 17; University of North Florida Student Union, 7:30 p.m.

Feb. 18, free

P

once de Leon never visited St. Augustine, much less discovered it. Pulitzer-prizewinner Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings was a failed writer. The great Indian chief Osceola wasn’t an Indian at all — both his parents were white.

In his latest book, Finding Florida: The True History of the Sunshine State (2013), author and historian T.D. Allman sets out to deconstruct what he describes as the myths and lies surrounding the Sunshine State’s 500-year history. Published by Atlantic Monthly Press, Finding Florida takes on some of our most foundational stories, tearing them apart like a pit bull with a slab©of 2013 raw meat.

“Florida is the Play-Doh State,” Allman writes in the book’s prologue. “Take the goo; mold it to your dream. Then watch the dream ooze back into goo. People are constantly ruining Florida; Florida is constantly ruining them back.”

FolioWeekly

“I want nothing from Florida.

All I want is to tell the truth.”

His work isn’t without its detractors: For instance, Gary Mornino, professor emeritus at USF St. Petersburg, wrote in the Tampa Bay Times that Finding Florida is “unbalanced, mean-spirited and arrogant.” Times staff writers found numerous (though sometimes pedantic) “forehead-slapping errors” — such as the idea that the Ku Klux Klan, which hated Catholics, made common cause with the mafia, or Allman’s statement that Rita Mae Brown and Zora Neale Huston were born here (actually Pennsylvania and Alabama, respectively).

Allman vociferously counters by pointing toward positive reviews in The New York Times and Wall Street Journal, as well as the fact that Finding Florida was a finalist for the National Book Award.

With Allman circling through town this week, Folio Weekly spoke with the bristly

5 Things We Learned from ‘Finding Florida’ 1. Florida’s bloody history started with an attack on Fort Caroline in Jacksonville by Spanish explorer Pedro Menendez de Aviles. His troops massacred hundreds of French there and killed others who had been shipwrecked near Cape Canaveral.

French leader Jean Ribault was among those executed. Menendez in turn founded St. Augustine.

Ironically, both Menendez and Ribault have Northeast Florida high schools named for them.

2. The great Indian chief, Osceola, revered by Florida State football fans for never giving up 24 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

Photo: ChengZhong Sui

author about his work, his critics, Trayvon Martin and the “neo-Confederate, racist falsehoods” that he says comprise much of this state’s accepted history.

Folio Weekly: Tell us a bit about why you wrote this book.

T.D. Allman: There is a hunger to know about Florida. There is a visceral understanding that what is happening in Florida is terribly, terribly important — not just funny, not just wacky, not just crazy. I don’t have a Florida agenda. I have a truth agenda and that is what led me to write the book.

F.W.: Critics have called the book “meanspirited” and said it’s full of inaccuracies.

T.D.A.: There is a small crowd that has conducted a vendetta against me. I can’t do anything about vicious local people. Instead of welcoming a new work, they make up lies about it.

F.W.: You’ve nothing good to say about the people who’ve written about Florida’s history, including some well-known college professors.

T.D.A.: When I set out to write this book, I did not understand that standard histories of Florida are infused with neo-Confederate, racist falsehoods that have made up the Florida mythology. These people are still writing as if Ponce de Leon discovered Florida. The general history of Florida is corrupt. I started this book, which took over 10 years of my life, without any preconceptions. I don’t work for the Chamber of Commerce and I’m not trying to get tenure from some state or regional university. I want nothing from Florida. All I want is to tell the truth. to the white man, had white parents. His real name was William Powell Jr.; his father was from Georgia and his mother was a descendant of Scottish traders.

3. St. Augustine’s Fountain of Youth was an invention of a Georgia-born publicity hound, Walter B. Fraser, who proclaimed that the famed explorer Juan Ponce de Leon had landed at the spot on St. Augustine’s mucky shoreline. Allman claims writer Washington Irving is responsible for spreading the tale of Ponce de Leon seeking a Fountain of Youth as a remedy for “el enflaquecimiento del sexo.”

F.W.: You’re particularly critical of Marjorie Kinnan Rawlings, who won the Pulitzer Prize for her novel The Yearling. You said, in particular, that she “portrayed a Florida as fake as the Fountain of Youth.”

T.D.A.: I called her a one-hit wonder. She had one book which was a success. I have nothing against her, but she is part of the mythology of Florida.

It’s a mediocre book and that’s why people love it. She is of little importance, in my judgment, in terms of the history of literature of Florida.

People get upset because they want to believe it’s great literature. It’s not. It’s a fable of a young boy growing up.

F.W.: You mentioned the trial of George Zimmerman in the book. Why is this case important?

T.D.A.: The thing that really hit me in the stomach was the killing of Trayvon Martin.

Trayvon Martin shows us that Florida’s legal system is fundamentally racist. You can shoot a black boy and get away with it. You have absolute impunity for crimes against blacks.

F.W.: You’ve said you put a very strong demand on your readers. What do you mean by that?

T.D.A: They have to completely re-evaluate everything they think they know about Florida, and a lot of things they think they know about America. What I want from my readers is that when they watch a news and weather broadcast in Florida, they will know if they had read my book exactly what is happening.

Ron Word rword@folioweekly.com

4. Florida is the only state to have a full-scale war fought entirely within its borders. The Florida Seminole War lasted for more than four decades, off and on from 1816-1858. More soldiers died in that war than in all the Indian wars fought west of the Mississippi combined.

5. Plantation owner Zephaniah Kingsley, who lived north of Jacksonville, proposed in 1829 that interracial sex should serve as the solution to America’s social and regional problems. His wife Anna was a former slave, who in turn owned her own slaves.

— Ron Word

A&E // ARTS PERFORMANCE

DEFENDING THE CAVEMAN Artist Series presents this oneman comedy show, Feb. 12-16 at Wilson Center for the Arts, FSCJ’s South Campus, 11900 Beach Blvd., Southside, $41.50-$45.50, 442-2929, artistseriesjax.org.

I OUGHT TO BE IN PICTURES Neil Simon’s classic play about a Hollywood screenwriter, played by Richard Karn of Home Improvement, who has commitment issues when a daughter he didn’t know he had shows up with dreams of stardom, at 6 p.m. Feb. 12-March 16, (weekend matinees vary), at Alhambra Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, $38-$55, 641-1212, alhambrajax.com.

BUTTERFLIES ARE FREE The play, about Don (who’s blind) escaping an overbearing mother and meeting zany Jill, runs at 7:30 p.m. Feb. 13-15, and 2 p.m. Feb. 16 at Limelight Theatre, 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine, $10-$25 (check for availability), 825-1164, limelight-theatre.org.

NOISES OFF A comedy about putting on a comedy, written by English playwright Michael Frayn, runs Feb. 13-22 at Amelia Community Theatre, 207 Cedar St., Fernandina Beach, $10-$20, 261-6749, ameliacommunitytheatre.org.

DIRTY BLONDE The comedy continues 8 p.m. Feb. 14 and 15 at Adele Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, $20, 249-7177, abettheatre.com.

EXTRAVAGANZA Douglas Anderson School’s annual event, directed by Dr. Ace Martin, shows off musicians, performers and visual artists, 7:30 p.m. Feb. 15 at the T-U Center, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $15, 346-5620 ext. 122, da-arts.org, ticketmaster.com.

LOVE LETTERS Playwright A.R. Gurney, a Pulitzer Prize for Drama finalist, wrote about a couple’s romantic lifetime, staged Feb. 16 and 23 at Raintree Restaurant Dinner Theatre, 102 San Marco Ave., St. Augustine, $39.95, 824-7211, raintreerestaurant.com.

DRIVING MISS DAISY Alfred Uhry’s play about Miss Daisy and her chauffeur Hoke, a meditation on aging, relationships and loyalty, is staged 4 p.m. Feb. 16 at Thrasher-Horne Center for the Arts, 283 College Drive, Orange Park, $16-$48, 276-6750, thcenter.org.

WAR HORSE Artist Series presents this Broadway show, with life-sized puppets of horses on stage, Feb. 18-23 at the T-U Center, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $32-$82, 442-2929, artistseriesjax.org.

MFA IN THE WORKS This informal program presents the work of MFA students in JU’s choreography program, 12:30 p.m. Feb. 20 and 7:30 p.m. Feb. 21 at Jacksonville University’s Brest Dance Pavilion, 2800 University Blvd. N., Arlington, free, 256-7371, arts.ju.edu.

THE SUBJECT WAS ROSES Frank Gilroy’s drama, which won a Pulitzer, a Tony and a New York Drama Critics Circle award for best play, is about Timmy Cleary’s return from WWII to the Bronx in May 1946. It’s staged Feb. 21-March 8 at Theatre Jacksonville, 2032 San Marco Blvd., San Marco, $25, 396-4425, theatrejax.com.

SWAN LAKE In the grand Russian tradition, a tragic story of a princess turned into a swan by a sorcerer’s curse is staged 7 p.m. Feb. 23 at Thrasher-Horne Center for the Arts, 283 College Drive, Orange Park, $16-$48, 276-6815, thcenter.org.

ALVIN AILEY AMERICAN DANCE THEATRE Artist Series presents this dance show – celebrating African-American cultural experience and American modern dance heritage – 7:30 p.m. Feb. 25 at the T-U Center, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $42-$107, 442-2929, artistseriesjax.org.

CELTIC WOMAN Artist Series presents this concert featuring classic Irish tunes, timeless pop anthems and inspirational songs, with the signature Celtic Woman sound, 8 p.m. Feb. 28 at the T-U Center, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $50-$136, 442-2929, artistseriesjax.org.

COMEDY

DOUG BENSON Comic Benson, star of documentary Super High Me and winner of High Times’ ’09 Stoner of the Year, appears 8 p.m. Feb. 12 at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, 292-4242, $20, comedyzone.com.

SOUTHERN STYLE FAMILY ENTERTAINMENT Comedian C.B. Smith delivers family-friendly, music-based comedy and impersonations Feb. 12-April 12 (7 p.m. Wed.-Sat.) at Mark Lance National Guard Armory, 190 San Marco Ave., St. Augustine, $10-$25, 866-661-6850, cbsmithshow.com.

HENRY CHO Always clean comic Cho, who’s been in three feature films and hosted a Comedy Central special, appears 8 p.m. Feb. 13-15, 10 p.m. Feb. 14-15 at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, 292-4242, $20-$25.

DWIGHT SLADE Slade elicits Valentine weekend laughs at 8 p.m. Feb. 13-15 and 10 p.m. Feb. 15 at The Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., Arlington, 646-4277, $6-$25, jacksonvillecomedy.com.

RUSSELL PETERS Ranked by Forbes as a top 10 highest grossing comics in the U.S. in ’09 and ’10, rock star comic Peters performs an intimate show 8 p.m. Feb. 20-23, 10 p.m. Feb. 21-22 at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Road, Mandarin, 292-4242, $30-$35, comedyzone.com.

STEVE LEMME & KEVIN FEFFERNAN Two guys (Broken Lizard comedy team, stars of Super Troopers and Beerfest) perform, play Broken Lizard Movie Trivia and reveal how they made Beerfest, 8 p.m. Feb. 27-March 1, 10 p.m. Feb. 28 and March 1, at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Road, Mandarin, 292-4242, $18-$20 (plus tax), comedyzone.com.

BRAD UPTON The 25-year comedy veteran appears at 8 p.m. Feb. 27-March 1 and at 10 p.m. March 1 at The Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., Arlington, 646-4277, $6-$25, jacksonvillecomedy.com.

CALLS & WORKSHOPS

BOUGHT & SOLD: VOICES OF HUMAN TRAFFICKING Part of the ArtWorks for Freedom Jax series to raise awareness about human trafficking in America, an outdoor exhibit is displayed Feb. 12-14 in Hemming Plaza, 117 W. Duval St., Downtown, and Feb. 15-28 at UNF’s Carpenter Library, 1 UNF Dr., Southside.

BORDERLESS CAPTIVITY Part of ArtWorks for Freedom JAX series to raise awareness of human trafficking in America, indoor art exhibits are shown Jan. 23-Feb. 28 at FSCJ’s Kent Campus, 401 W. State St., and at Jacksonville University Davis Student Commons, 2800 University Blvd., Arlington.

YOUNG PROFESSIONALS ORGANIZATION Businesspeople ages 21-39 meet 6 p.m. Feb. 13 at Lightner Museum, 75 King St., St. Augustine, 824-2874, info@staugypo.com.

GREAT DECISIONS Discussions about global issues include Defense Technology at 6:30 p.m. Feb. 13 and Israel and the U.S. on Feb. 20 at Southeast Regional Library, 10599 Deerwood Park Blvd., 630-4655, free, jpl.coj.net.

AUDITIONS AT ABET Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre auditions for Bay at the Moon, two female roles and four male roles, at 2 p.m. Feb. 15 at Adele Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-7177, abettheatre.com.

HAJJ ART Dr. Ronald Lukens-Bull discusses The Art of the Hajj, by British Museum curator Venetia Porter, 2 p.m. Feb. 16 at Southeast Regional Library, 10599 Deerwood Park Blvd., 630-4655, free, reservations required, jaxpubliclibrary.org/ muslimjourneys BEFORE EMAIL: LETTERS FROM BLACK AMERICA Local authors give life to writings of Toni Morrison, Martin Luther King Jr., Zora Neale Hurston, Langston Hughes and others, 3:30 p.m. Feb. 15 at Main Library, 303 N. Laura St., Downtown, 630-2954, free, jpl.coj.net.

AUTHOR TALK, BOOK SIGNING Historian Daniel Schafer discusses and signs copies of his new book, Zephaniah Kingsley Jr. and The Atlantic World: Slave Trader, Plantation Owner, Emancipator, 6:30 p.m. Feb. 18 at University Park Library, 3435 University Blvd. N., 630-1265, free, jpl.coj.net.

JOURNALIST & AUTHOR Correspondent T.D. Allman, noted for eyewitness accounts of historic events, discusses his book, Florida: Revelations of America, at 7:30 p.m. Feb. 18 at University of North Florida’s Student Union, 1 UNF Dr., 620-1496, free, unf.edu/studentunion.

AUTHOR DISCUSSION Charles Tingley, St. Augustine Historical Society senior research librarian, discusses Constance Fenimore Woolson, 19th-century travel writer who visited here, 10:30 a.m. Feb. 22 at St. Cyprian Episcopal Church, 37 Lovett St., St. Augustine, 829-8828, free, stcypriansepiscopalchurch.org.

THEATRE JACKSONVILLE AUDITIONS For three male and three female roles in Hilda’s Yard, by Canadian playwright Norm Foster about empty-nesters whose nest isn’t empty after their grown children return. Cold readings from script, 6 p.m.

Feb. 23 (staged April 11-16) at Theatre Jacksonville, 2032 San Marco Blvd., San Marco, 396-4425, theatrejax.com/auditions.

ACTORS WORKSHOP Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre holds an 8-week workshop, 6 p.m. every Sun., Feb. 23-April 13 at Adele Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, $160, 249-7177, abettheatre.com.

AUTHOR REVISITS RESTAURANTS Dorothy Fletcher discusses her new book, Lost Restaurants of Jacksonville and other works about her life here, 5:30 p.m. Feb. 25 at Main Library, 303 N. Laura St., Downtown, 630-2954, free, jpl.coj.net.

PSYCHOLOGY OF HUMAN TRAFFICKING Artworks for Freedom holds a 2-day workshop on human trafficking, and the effects on its victims; 8:30 a.m.-4:30 p.m. Feb. 27-28 at Jacksonville Children’s Commission, 1095 A. Philip Randolph Blvd., $35, 598-0901, info@thevoiceforgirls.org.

CONCERT ON THE GREEN POSTER CONTEST To celebrate U.S. veterans, submissions accepted for a poster contest themed Honoring Our Military with Art and Music. All public, private and home school students may enter. Applications must be submitted at concertatthegreen.com. Final entries delivered to Great Hang Ups Gallery, 1560 Business Center Dr., Fleming Island, by Feb. 28.

PLANTATION ARTISTS’ GUILD & GALLERY As part of his gallery display, Spanish oil painter Dionisio Rodriquez demonstrates his craft at 7 p.m. Feb. 21 at the gallery, 94 Amelia Village Circle, Amelia Island, 432-1750, artamelia.com.

JUNIOR ROWITA FELLOWSHIP St. Johns Cultural Council accepts applications for the fellowships, available to all graduating St. Johns County high school girls (public, private, homeschooled) who’ve applied for or been accepted into a Bachelor of Fine Arts program. Applications must be sent by Feb. 28 to St. Johns Cultural Council, 15 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine, 808-7330, stjohnsculture.com.

ARTS LEADERS NOMINATIONS Cultural Council of Greater Jacksonville accepts nominations for Art Activist, Art Educator, Art Collector, Art Innovator and Art Philanthropist. Submit an essay, up to 500 words, to mason@culturalcouncil.org by March 15. Include name, email and phone number for nominee and nominator. Winners recognized at Art Awards May 1.

SPARK GRANT 2014 Cultural Council of Greater Jacksonville accepts applications for Spark Grant Program by March 12 through culturalcouncil.org. Individual artists and nonprofit organizations in Duval, Nassau, St. Johns, Clay and Baker counties are eligible. Temporary installations only. Funded projects executed July 1, 2014-June 30, 2015.

CLASSICAL & JAZZ

JU STUDENT JAZZ COMBOS 7:30 p.m. Feb. 12 at Jacksonville University’s Swisher Theater, 2800 University Blvd., Arlington, free, 256-7677, ju.edu.

FIRST LOOK: “Eyebiscus,” a digital piece by Ponte Vedra High School student Lauren Barnhorst, is among works display at Northeast Florida Scholastic Art Awards exhibit. Fifteen area students received Gold Key awards; their works are displayed through February at Jacksonville Main Library, through March at the Museum of Contemporary Art Jacksonville.

JU MUSIC STUDENT RECITAL Final faculty-chosen recital 7:30 p.m. Feb. 13 at Jacksonville University’s Terry Concert Hall, 2800 University Blvd., Arlington, free, 256-7677, ju.edu.

ROMEO AND JULIET Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra performs under the direction of guest conductor André Raphel, 7:30 p.m. Feb. 13, 11 a.m. Feb. 14 and 8 p.m. Feb. 14-15 at the T-U Center’s Jacoby Symphony Hall, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $16-$72, 354-5547, jaxsymphony.org.

FESTIVAL OF STRINGS Ensembles of the JSYO, Douglas Anderson and LaVilla schools, and Jump Start Strings, 5 p.m.

Feb. 16 at T-U Center’s Jacoby Symphony Hall, 300 W. Water St., Downtown, $5-$10, 354-5547, jaxsymphony.org.

ART WALKS & MARKETS

DOWNTOWN FRIDAY MARKET Arts & crafts, local produce 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Feb. 14 and every Fri. at The Jacksonville Landing, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, 353-1188.

ARTS & CRAFT SHOW The annual show includes artworks, handmade crafts and food, 10 a.m.-5 p.m. Feb. 15 and 10 a.m.-4 p.m. Feb. 16 at St. Augustine Beach Pier, 350 A1A Beach Blvd., 352-344-0657, tnteventsinc.com.

WINTER RAM Local and regional art, food artists and a farmers market, 10 a.m.-1 p.m. Feb. 15 and 22 at the market under the Fuller Warren bridge, 715 Riverside Ave., Riverside, free admission, 389-2449 , riversideartsmarket.com.

NORTH BEACHES ART WALK Galleries of Atlantic and Neptune beaches 5-9 p.m. Feb. 20 from Sailfish Drive in Atlantic Beach to Neptune Beach and Town Center, 249-2222, nbaw.org.

AMELIA ISLAND BOOK FESTIVAL Danny Ellis’ concert, 7-9 p.m. Feb. 20 at St. Peter’s Burns Hall, 801 Atlantic Ave. ($20); writer workshops 9 a.m.-4 p.m. Feb. 21 at FSCJ’s Cook Nassau Center, 76346 Burgess Blvd., Yulee ($85). Author Extravaganza with fiction, nonfiction, children’s and YA authors, 9 a.m.-4 p.m. at Recreation Center, 2500 Atlantic Ave., Fernandina Beach, 624-1665, ameliaislandbookfestival.com.

MUSEUMS

ALEXANDER BREST MUSEUM & GALLERY Jacksonville University, 2800 University Blvd. N., Arlington, 256-7371, arts. ju.edu. Brian Frus and Lily Kuonen’s exhibit, “Two Gather,” exploring layering form, material and content, through Feb. 12.

BEACHES MUSEUM & HISTROY PARK 381 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 241-5657, beachesmuseum.org. The exhibit “Don Bernardo de Gálvez y Madrid, Spanish Hero in the American Revolution” is displayed through March 1.

CRISP-ELLERT ART MUSEUM Flagler College, 48 Sevilla St., St. Augustine, 826-8530, flagler.edu/crispellert. “The Object Tells a Story,” an exhibit of African-American folk art from Florida, runs through February.

CUMMER MUSEUM OF ART & GARDENS 829 Riverside Ave., Riverside, 356-6857, cummer.org. “The Art of Empathy,” an exhibit showcasing a permanent collection masterwork, “Mother of Sorrows,” through Feb. 16. Artistic and devotional contexts are explored through 21 works, 19 borrowed from collections in the U.S. and Germany. “One Family: Photographs

by Vardi Kahana,” an exhibit by Israeli photographer detailing four generations of her family, through April 27. FSU Professor William Walmsley displays work through July 8. “The Human Figure: Sculptures by Enzo Torcoletti,” through September.

KARPELES MANUSCRIPT MUSEUM 101 W. First St., Springfield, 356-2992. “Mark Twain” exhibits original letters, writings and illustrations through April 26. “New Works,” Joe Segal’s sculptural works through February.

MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART JACKSONVILLE 333 N. Laura St., Downtown, 366-6911, mocajacksonville.com.

Ingrid Calame’s exhibit “Tarred Over Cracks” runs through March 9, part of Project Atrium in Haskell Gallery. “Material Transformations” through April 6. UNF Gallery shows “Bede Clarke: Barbara Ritzman Devereux Visiting Artist Exhibition”

&&&

MORE ARTS

Find more arts events and submit your own at folioweekly.com/calendar.

through March 9. The Gold Key portfolio show presents works

by Scholastic Art Award winners show, through March.

MUSEUM OF SCIENCE & HISTORY 1025 Museum Circle, Southbank, 396-6674, themosh.org. “Uncovering the Past: Archaeological Discoveries of North Florida,” through August.

VISITOR INFORMATION CENTER 10 W. Castillo Dr., St. Augustine, 825-1000, staugustine-450.com/journey. “Journey: 450 years of African-American Experience,” through July 15.

GALLERIES

AMIRO ART & FOUND GALLERY 9C Aviles St., St. Augustine, 824-8460, amiroartandfound.com. “heArt,” original works by local artists – jewelry, mosaics, pottery, paintings – through February. Alexander Wilds’ Sculptures are on display.

THE ART CENTER MAIN GALLERY 31 W. Adams St., Downtown, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org/main.html.

February’s featured artist is Annelies Dyksgraaf. “Valentines” artwork is displayed. Paintings, pastels, sketches and photography by member artists is displayed.

THE ART CENTER PREMIER GALLERY 50 N. Laura St., Downtown, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org/premier-gallery. “A Celebration of Cultures” exhibit runs through March 6.

FIRST STREET GALLERY 216-B First St., Neptune Beach, 241-6928, firststreetgalleryart.com. Mermaid artwork by local artists including Linda Olsen, Mary Hubley, Tracy Womack, Pat Livesay and JoAnne Adams, through April 1.

FSCJ NORTH CAMPUS ART GALLERY 4501 Capper Rd., Northside, 766-6785, fscj.edu. James Kemp’s “Talismans and Champa Temples of Vietnam,” through March 4.

HASKELL GALLERY & DISPLAY CASES JIA, 14201 Pecan Park Rd., Northside, 741-3546. Paintings by Candace Fasano and Marie Shell, of beauty in the natural world, through March 28 in Haskell Gallery. John Cheer’s decorative wall plates and sculpture, through April 7 in Connector Bridge Art display case.

Photographer John Adams’ “Evanescent Trawlers of the South” series, through April 4 in Concourse A and C display cases.

LUFRANO INTERCULTURAL GALLERY 1 UNF Dr., Student Union, Southside, 620-2475. Elizabeth Brown Eagle’s exhibit, “Visions of Grace,” mixed-media photo collages based on her time with Samburu and Maasai tribes in Northeastern Kenya and the Xhosa people in South Africa, through March 21.

PALENCIA FINE ARTS ACADEMY AND GALLERY 701 Market St., St. Augustine, 819-1584, palenciafineartsacademy.com.

Stacie Hernandez’s show “Elements,” through March 21.

PLANTATION ARTISTS’ GUILD & GALLERY 94 Amelia Village Circle, Amelia Island, 432-1750, artamelia.com. “Arts and Flowers” reception 5 p.m. Feb. 14. Spanish oil paintings by Dionisio Rodriquez are exhibited through March 8.

SAWGRASS VILLAGE ARTS GALLERY 1520 Sawgrass Village Dr., Ponte Vedra, 273-4925, villageartspvb.com. Florida landscapes by Laurel Dagnillo are displayed through March 29.

ST. AUGUSTINE ART ASSOCIATION 22 Marine St., St. Augustine, 824-2310, staaa.org. 90th anniversary juried exhibit includes “Lost Colony,” through March 2.

SOUTHLIGHT GALLERY 201 N. Hogan St., Ste. 100, Downtown, 553-6361, southlightgallery.com. UNF ArtSpace exhibit features Ladnier Scholarship recipient Nina Avis, and runners-up Eman Abdulhalim and Jordyn Rector.

For a complete list of art events, go to folioweekly.com/calendar.

To submit yours, go to folioweekly.com/eventhowto.html. We don’t accept emails for print listings. The deadline for print is 4 p.m. Mon., 10 days before publication.

FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 25

DINING DIRECTORY

Dining Directory

To have your restaurant included, contact your account manager or Sam Taylor, 904.260.9770 ext. 111, staylor@folioweekly.com DINING DIRECTORY KEY

Average Entrée Cost: $ = Less than $8 $$ = $8-$14 $$$ = $15-$22 $$$$ = $23 & up = Beer, Wine = Full Bar C = Children’s Menu = Take Out B = Breakfast R = Brunch L = Lunch D = Dinner *Bite Club Certified! = Hosted a free Folio Weekly Bite Club tasting. Join at fwbiteclub.com.

2013 Best of Jax winner F = FW distribution spot

AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH, YULEE

BARBERITOS, 1519 Sadler Rd., 277-2505. 463867 S.R. 200, Ste. 5, Yulee, 321-2240. F Specializing in Southwestern made-to-order fresh favorites: burritos, tacos, quesadillas, nachos, salads. Salsa’s handcrafted with fresh tomatoes, cilantro, onions, peppers. $$ C L D Daily BRETT’S WATERWAY CAFÉ, 1 S. Front St., 261-2660.

F On the water at historic Centre Street’s end, it’s Southern hospitality in an upscale atmosphere; daily specials, fresh local seafood, aged beef. $$$ C L D Daily CAFÉ KARIBO, 27 N. Third St., 277-5269. F In a historic building, family-owned spot has eclectic cuisine: homemade veggie burgers, fresh seafood, salads, made-from-scratch desserts. Dine inside or on oak-shaded patio. Karibrew Pub has beer brewed onsite. $$ C L D Tue.-Sat.; L Daily CIAO ITALIAN BISTRO, 302 Centre St., 206-4311.

Authentic Italian fare in an upscale bistro: pizzas, pasta dishes, entrées, Italian wines. $$$ D Nightly DAVID’S RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, 802 Ash St., 310-6049.

In Historic District. Fresh seafood, prime aged meats, rack of lamb served in an elegant, chic spot. $$$$ D Nightly HALFTIME SPORTS BAR & GRILL, 320 S. Eighth St., 321-0303. Sports bar fare: onion rings, spring rolls, burgers, wraps, wings. $ L D Daily JACK & DIANE’S, 708 Centre St., 321-1444. F In a renovated 1887 shotgun home. Favorites: jambalaya, French toast, mac-n-cheese, vegan, vegetarian selections. Dine inside or out on the porch. $$ C B L D Daily LULU’S AT THE THOMPSON HOUSE, 11 S. Seventh St., 432-8394. F Innovative lunch menu: po’boys, salads and seafood little plates served in a historic house.

Dinner features fresh local seafood, Fernandina shrimp.

Reservations recommended. $$$ C R Sun.; L D Tue.-Sat. MOON RIVER PIZZA, 925 S. 14th St., 321-3400. F See Riverside. 2013 BOJ winner. $ L D Mon.-Sat. THE MUSTARD SEED CAFE, 833 TJ Courson Rd., 277-3141.

Awarded Slow Food First Coast’s Snail of Approval, the casual organic eatery and juice bar, in Nassau Health Foods, offers all-natural, organic items, smoothies, juices, coffees, herbal teas. $$ B L Mon.-Sat. THE PECAN ROLL BAKERY, 122 S. Eighth St., 491-9815.

In historic district. More than just nuts; sweet and savory pastries, cookies, cakes, breads – and cronuts. Breakfast items, too. $ B L D Wed.-Sun. PLAE, 80 Amelia Village Cir., 277-2132. Bite Club certified. In Omni Amelia Island Plantation’s Spa & Shops, the bistro-style venue has an innovative menu: whole fried fish and duck breast. Outdoor dining. $$$ D Mon.-Sat. THE SALTY PELICAN BAR & GRILL, 12 N. Front St., 277-3811. F Killer sunset view over the ICW from secondstory outdoor bar. Owners T.J. and Al offer local seafood, Mayport shrimp, fish tacos, po’boys and the original broiled cheese oysters. $$ C L D Daily SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652. F 2013 BOJ winner. Oceanfront restaurant serves award-winning handmade crab cakes, fresh seafood, fried pickles. Outdoor dining, open-air second floor and balcony. $$ C L D Daily THE SURF, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 261-5711. F Oceanview dining, inside or on the deck. New menu: Steaks, seafood, nightly specials, healthy options. $$ L D Daily TIMOTI’S FRY SHAK, 21 N. Third St., 310-6550. F Casual seafood spot has fresh, local wild-caught shrimp, fish, oysters, blackboard specials, seafood baskets. $ C L D Daily T-RAY’S BURGER STATION, 202 S. Eighth St., 261-6310.

F This spot in an old gas station offers blue plate specials, burgers, biscuits & gravy, shrimp. $ B L Mon.-Sat.

ARLINGTON, REGENCY

LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 8818 Atlantic Blvd., 720-0106. F See San Marco. $$ C L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1301 Monument Rd. F See Baymeadows. $ C B L D Daily

26 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

RACK ’EM UP BILLIARDS, 1825 University Blvd. N., 745-0335. F Cigar and hookah lounge has billiards tables, a full kitchen, a variety of subs for late-nighters. 200-plus imported, domestic beers. $ R Sat.-Sun.; D Nightly

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

ALE PIE HOUSE, 3951 St. Johns Ave., 503-8000. Pizza made your way, subs, paninis, calzone, stromboli, wraps, dinners. Gluten-free, vegan cheese available. $$ C L D Daily BAGEL LOVE, 4114 Herschel St., Ste. 121, 634-7253 2013 BOJ winner. Northern-style bagels, sandwiches, wraps, salads, soups, bakery items, sides, fresh-squeezed orange juice and lemonade, coffees, smoothies and tea. Homecooked turkey, chicken and roast beef. Free Wi-Fi. Locally owned and operated. Outdoor patio dining. $ C B L Daily THE CASBAH CAFÉ, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966. F 2013 BOJ winner. Middle Eastern and Mediterranean cuisine on the patio or in a hookah lounge. Wi-Fi, belly dancers, hookah pipes. $$ L D Daily ESPETO BRAZILIAN STEAK HOUSE, 4000 St. Johns Ave., Ste. 40, 388-4884. F Celebrating five years, this churrascaria has gauchos who carve the meat onto your plate from their serving tables. $$$ D Tue.-Sun. FLORIDA CREAMERY, 3566 St. Johns Ave., 619-5386.

Premium ice cream, fresh waffle cones, milkshakes, sundaes and Nathan’s grilled hot dogs, served in Florida-centric décor. Low-fat and sugar-free choices. $ C L Mon.-Sat. THE FOX RESTAURANT, 3580 St. Johns Ave., 387-2669.

F Owners Ian and Mary Chase offer fresh diner fare and homemade desserts. Breakfast all day. Signature items: burgers, meatloaf, fried green tomatoes. A Jacksonville landmark for more than 50 years. $$ C L D Daily GREEN MAN GOURMET, 3543 St. Johns Ave., 384-0002.

F This market features organic and natural products, spices, teas and salts. $ Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 4530 St. Johns Ave., 388-8828. F See San Marco. $$ C L D Daily LET THEM EAT CAKE! 3604 St. Johns Ave., Ste. 2, 389-2122. Artisan bakery serves coffee, croissants, muffins, cupcakes (The Fat Elvis!), pastries, individual desserts.

Whole cakes made-to-order. $ Tue.-Sat. MOJO NO. 4 URBAN BBQ & WHISKEY BAR, 3572 St. Johns Ave., 381-6670. F 2013 BOJ winner. Funky Southern blues kitchen offers pulled pork, Carolina-style barbecue, chicken-fried steak, Delta fried catfish, hummus, shrimp and grits, specialty cocktails. $$ C B L D Daily SAKE HOUSE #5 JAPANESE GRILL SUSHI BAR, 3620 St. Johns Ave., 388-5688. F See Riverside. $$ L D Daily SIMPLY SARA’S, 2902 Corinthian Ave., Ortega, 387-1000.

F Down-home cooking from scratch like Grandma’s: eggplant fries, pimento cheese, fried chicken, fruit cobblers, chicken & dumplings. BYOB. $$ C L D Mon.-Sat. TERRA, 4260 Herschel St., 388-9124. Michael Thomas’ comfy spot serves local, sustainable creative world cuisine.

Small plates: chorizo stuffed mushrooms, pork belly skewers; entrées: lamb chops, seared tuna, ribeye. Sandwiches, craft beers, onsite organic garden. $$ D Mon.-Sat.

BAYMEADOWS

AL’S PIZZA, 8060 Philips Hwy., 731-4300. F 2013 BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ C L D Daily BROADWAY RISTORANTE & PIZZERIA, 10920 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 3, 519-8000. F Family-ownedand-operated Italian pizzeria serves calzones, strombolis, wings, brick-oven-baked pizza, subs, desserts. Delivery. $$ C L D Daily INDIA’S RESTAURANT, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 8, 620-0777. F Authentic Indian cuisine, lunch buffet. Curry and vegetable dishes, lamb, chicken, shrimp, fish tandoori. $$ L Mon.-Sat.; D Nightly LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 8206 Philips Hwy., 732-9433. F See San Marco. $$ C L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., 737-7740.

8616 Baymeadows Rd., 739-2498. F All over Northeast Florida, Larry’s piles subs high and serves ’em fast. Natural meats and cheeses are hormone-, antibiotic- and gluten-free; the sub rolls are gluten-free, too. $ C B L D Daily MANDALOUN MEDITERRANEAN LEBANESE CUISINE, 9862 Old Baymeadows Rd., 646-1881. F Bite Club certified.

Owner Pierre Barakat offers authentic Lebanese cuisine, charcoal-grilled lamb kebab. Belly dancing Fri.-Sat. Monthly dinner parties. Outdoor seating. $$ L D Tue.-Sun. PATTAYA THAI GRILLE, 9551 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 1, 646-9506. F The area’s original authentic Thai restaurant has an extensive menu of traditional Thai, vegetarian and new-Thai, including curries, seafood, noodles, soups. In business since 1990, family-owned place has low-sodium and gluten-free dishes, too. $$$ L D Tue.-Sun. PIZZA PALACE, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., 527-8649. F See San Marco. $$ C L D Daily STICKY FINGERS, 8129 Point Meadows Way, 493-7427. F Memphis-style rib house slow-smokes meats over hickory.

Award-winning ribs, barbecue, rotisserie chicken, signature sauces. Screened patio. $$ C L D Daily

Jonathan Phillips shows off a Northern-style cheese pizza at Moon River Pizza in Fernandina Beach.

There’s another Moon River in Riverside. Photo: Dennis Ho

BEACHES

(Locations are Jax Beach unless otherwise noted.)

AL’S PIZZA, 303 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Center, Atlantic Beach, 249-0002. F 2013 BOJ winner.

Celebrating more than 20 years and seven locations, Al’s offers a selection of New York-style and gourmet pizzas. $ C L D Daily BUDDHA THAI BISTRO, 301 10th Ave. N., 712-4444. F The proprietors here are from Thailand; dishes made with fresh ingredients from tried-and-true recipes. $$ L D Daily CAMPECHE BAY CANTINA, 127 First Ave. N., 249-3322.

F Chili rellenos, tamales, fajitas, enchiladas, fish tacos, fried ice cream, margaritas. $$ C D Nightly CASA MARIA, 2429 S. Third St., 372-9000. F See Springfield. $ C L D Daily CULHANE’S IRISH PUBLIC HOUSE, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-9595. Bite Club certified. Upscale Irish pub owned and managed by four sisters from County Limerick. Shepherd’s pie, corned beef; gastro pub menu soars to culinary heights. $$ C R Sat. & Sun.; D Tue.-Sun. ENGINE 15 BREWING CO., 1500 Beach Blvd., Ste. 217, 249-2337. F 2013 BOJ winner. Gastropub fare: soups, salads, flatbreads, specialty sandwiches, including BarBeCuban and beer dip. Craft beers. $ C L D Daily GREGORY PAUL’S, 215 Fourth Ave. S., 372-4367. Greg Rider offers freshly prepared meals and experienced catering services. $$ Mon.-Fri. LANDSHARK CAFE, 1728 Third St. N., 246-6024. F Locally owned and operated. Fresh, right-off-the-boat local seafood, fish tacos, houseground burgers, wings, handcut fries, tater tots; daily specials. $$ C L D Daily; R Sun. LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1222 Third St. S., 372-4495. F See San Marco. $$ C L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 657 N. Third St., 247-9620. F See Baymeadows. $ C B L D Daily LILLIE’S COFFEE BAR, 200 First St., Beaches Town Center, Neptune Beach, 249-2922. F Beaches landmark.

Locally roasted coffee, eggs and bagels, flatbreads, sandwiches, salads and desserts. Dine indoors or out; patio and courtyard seating. $$ B L D Daily M SHACK, 299 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Center, Atlantic Beach, 241-2599. F 2013 BOJ winner. David and Matthew Medure are flippin’ burgers, hot dogs, fries, shakes and familiar fare at moderate prices. Dine indoors or out. $$ L D Daily MARLIN MOON GRILLE, 1183 Beach Blvd., 372-4438.

F This sportfishing-themed casual place features fresh crab cakes – owner Gary Beach is from Maryland’s Eastern Shore – and burgers, daily specials, craft beers, Orange Crushes, fresh-cut fries. $$ C R Sun.; D Wed.-Mon. MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 1018 Third St. N., Ste. 2, 241-5600. F Bite Club certified. 2013 BOJ winner. The psychedelic spot serves gourmet pizzas, hoagies, salads. Pies range from Mighty Meaty to vegetarian like Kosmic Karma. $ C L D Daily MEZZA LUNA PIZZERIA RISTORANTE, 110 First St., Beaches Town Center, Neptune Beach, 249-5573.

F Near-the-ocean eatery serves casual bistro fare (for 20+ years) like gourmet wood-fired pizzas, herb-crusted mahi mahi. Dine indoors or on the patio. $$$ C D Mon.-Sat. MOJO KITCHEN BBQ PIT & BLUES BAR, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636. F 2013 BOJ winner. Funky Southern blues kitchen offers pulled pork, Carolina-style barbecue, chickenfried steak, Delta fried catfish. $$ C B L D Daily NORTH BEACH BISTRO, 725 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 6, Atlantic Beach, 372-4105. Bite Club certified. Casual dining with an elegant touch: slow-cooked veal osso buco, calypso crusted mahi mahi with plantain chips. $$$ C L D Daily POE’S TAVERN, 363 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7637. F American gastropub has gourmet hamburgers, ground in-house and cooked to order, hand-cut French fries,

fish tacos, entree-size salads, Edgar’s Drunken Chili, daily fish sandwich special. $$ C L D Daily RAGTIME TAVERN & SEAFOOD GRILL, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Center, Atlantic Beach, 241-7877 F For 30 years, the popular seafood place has nabbed lots of awards in our Best of Jax readers poll. Blackened snapper, sesame tuna, Ragtime shrimp. $$ L D Daily RENNA’S PIZZA, 592 Marsh Landing Pkwy., 273-3113.

F See Mandarin. $$ C L D Daily SALT LIFE FOOD SHACK, 1018 Third St. N., 372-4456.

F 2013 BOJ winner. Specialty items, signature tuna poke bowl, fresh rolled sushi, Ensenada tacos, local fried shrimp, in a contemporary open-air space. $$ C L D Daily SHIM SHAM ROOM, 333 First St. N., Ste. 150, 372-0781.

F 2013 BOJ winner. Seasonal menu of “cheap eats”: bar bites, chicken & waffles, badass fries, tacos. $$ D Nightly WIPEOUTS GRILL, 1585 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 247-4508. F Casual sports spot serves burgers, wings, fish tacos in a chill atmosphere. $ C L D Daily

DOWNTOWN

AVOCADOS, 311 W. Ashley St., Ste. 1, 683-9947. Mac & cheese, Southwestern wrap, French dip. Fresh ingredients, cooked to order. $ B L D Mon.-Sat. CAFÉ NOLA at MOCAJAX, 333 N. Laura St., 366-6911. On Museum of Contemporary Art first floor. Shrimp and grits, gourmet sandwiches, fresh fish tacos, homemade desserts. $$ L Mon.-Fri.; D Thur. & ArtWalk CASA DORA, 108 E. Forsyth St., 356-8282. F Owner/chef Sam Hamidi has been serving genuine Italian fare 35-plus years: veal, seafood, pizza. Homemade salad dressing is a specialty. $$ C L D Mon.-Sat. CHOMP CHOMP, 106 E. Adams St., 762-4667. F This spot has eats at moderate prices – most under $10. Chef-inspired street food: panko-crusted chicken, burgers, chinois tacos, bahn mi, barbecue. $ L Tue.-Sat.; D Fri. & Sat. DE REAL TING CAFÉ, 128 W. Adams St., 633-9738. F Caribbean spot features jerk or curried chicken, conch fritters, curried goat, oxtail. $ L Tue.-Fri.; D Fri.-Sat. FIONN MACCOOL’S IRISH PUB & RESTAURANT, Ste. 176, Jacksonville Landing, 374-1547. F 2013 BOJ winner.

Casual dining, uptown Irish atmosphere. Fish & chips, blackand-tan brownies, Guinness lamb stew. $$ C L D Daily ZODIAC GRILL, 120 W. Adams St., 354-8283. F Mediterranean cuisine and American favorites in a casual atmosphere. Panini, vegetarian dishes, daily lunch buffet.

Espressos, hookahs. $ L Mon.-Fri.

FLEMING ISLAND

BRICK OVEN PIZZERIA & GASTROPUB, 1811 Town Center Blvd., 278-1770. F Family-owned-and-operated; offers freshly made brick-oven pizzas, specialty burgers, melts, wraps, craft beers. Gluten-free items. $$ C L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1571 C.R. 220, Ste. 100, 215-2223. F See San Marco. $$ C L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 1800 Town Center Blvd., 541-1999. F See Beaches. Bite Club certified.

2013 BOJ winner. $ C L D Daily MOJO SMOKEHOUSE, 1810 Town Center Blvd., Ste. 8, 264-0636. F 2013 BOJ winner. Funky Southern blues kitchen offers pulled pork, Carolina-style barbecue, chickenfried steak, Delta fried catfish. $$ C B L D Daily WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198. F Authentic fish camp serves gator tail, fresh-water river catfish, traditional meals, daily specials on the banks of Swimming Pen Creek. Outdoor Tiki bar. Come by boat, motorcycle or car. $ C L Tue.-Sun.; D Nightly YOUR PIE, 1545 C.R. 220, Ste. 125, 379-9771. F Bite Club certified. Owner Mike Sims has a fast, casual pizza concept: Choose from three doughs, nine sauces, seven

BITE-SIZED

KEEP ON TRUCKIN’: On The Fly is the reigning Best of Jax winner, as chosen by Folio Weekly readers. Photo: Caron Streibich

The Food Trucks Have It

Jax Beach is finally letting the trucks operate within city limits – and that’s a good thing for all of us

W

hile food trucks have become wildly popular in Jacksonville in recent years, on the other side of the ditch, they’ve not been so welcome. But last week, after a twoyear campaign by food-truck advocates, the Jacksonville Beach City Council finally agreed to allow the trucks to operate within city limits, at least during a 14-month pilot program.

There are limitations: Food trucks have to get permission from property owners to set up shop (they can’t use vacant or noncommercial land), and they can’t do so within 100 feet of brick-and-mortar restaurants. They have to apply for a permit at City Hall and pay an annual business tax ($79.20). They have to shut down by 3 a.m., or by 10 p.m. if they’re close to residential properties.

But at least it’s something. “There is so much creativity coming out of these food trucks, and there is some really, really good food,” says Councilwoman Chris Hoffman, who championed the food truck cause.

She’s right — and I’ve tasted it firsthand.

On The Fly Sandwiches ‘n’ Stuff chef Andrew Ferenc serves freshly seared ahi tuna over crunchy napa cabbage slaw that’s topped with pickled ginger and a sweet chili sauce. Chew Chew has a flavor-packed Korean short rib melt with smoked provolone and diced kimchi slaw. And just last week I tried beet fries (yes, that’s a thing) from Funkadelic. Verdict?

Delicious. And it’s just the beginning. Jax Beach residents will soon have all kinds of innovative culinary options to choose from, and that has foodies like me chomping at the bit.

(Disclosure: My fiancé Mike Field and I manage the Jax Truckies Facebook group.)

That’s because food trucks offer room for experimentation. Consider this: Long-time Beaches resident John Stanford and his brother Jeff opened a food truck in the summer of 2012 in an effort to get the name of their then-under-construction brick-and-mortar restaurant, The Salty Fig (now The Blind Fig), out to the masses. The Blind Fig’s wildly popular pork belly and fried oyster sandwich first debuted on the food truck. Now it’s served

in the restaurant, as are other items that got their start on board. One of the best things about a truck is that chefs can change the menu frequently, since they’re not buying in bulk like at a restaurant.

“Our customers aren’t looking for the restaurant experience,” says Patrick O’Grady, who opened Driftwood BBQ truck in 2011.

“They’re looking for a good, quick meal.”

Driftwood is one of my favorite BBQ trucks. The ribs are so perfectly tender and seasoned that I’ve placed two separate catering orders for mass quantities for a picnic and a retirement party. When people ask where they’re from (as they lick their fingers clean), I give props not to some well-established joint with white tablecloths and a highbrow whiskey selection, but to a humble food truck.

“There’s a synergy that’s created when you put trucks’ and restaurants’ strengths together,” John Stanford says. “Some people fear the food trucks will take away job opportunities and sales revenue [from nearby restaurants]. But really, the guys and gals operating these trucks are all local people looking to start their own kitchens and design their own menus and concept without the huge cost of building out a full-scale restaurant. I think there is a market for every kind of kitchen.

“It just gives more options but doesn’t mean the brick-and-mortars should fear that.

Competition is healthy in any industry, [and] gives the businesses even more of a reason to produce a better product and continue evolving.”

Competition does make the world go ’round — and the foodie world is no different.

If you own a hot dog shop and feel threatened by a taco truck, step up your game, or at least embrace the fact that not everyone wants to eat hot dogs all the time. I predict we’ll soon see an increase in innovative choices available all around the beaches, providing a bigger assortment of options to residents and tourists alike.

© 2014

Caron Streibich Folio Weekly Bite Club Host biteclub@folioweekly.com facebook.com/folioweeklybitesized FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 27

GRILL ME!

DINING DIRECTORY

A WEEKLY Q&A WITH PEOPLE IN THE FOOD BIZ

NAME: Melina Hurley RESTAURANT: Julington Creek Fish Camp, 12760 San Jose Blvd., Julington Creek BIRTHPLACE: Jacksonville YEARS IN THE BIZ: 18 FAVORITE RESTAURANT (other than mine): Tamas Sushi in Neptune Beach FAVORITE COOKING STYLE: Southern FAVORITE INGREDIENTS: Vegetables, fresh herbs, local Mayport shrimp IDEAL MEAL: A large salad with fresh veggies and a nice piece of seared fish or blackened Mayport shrimp WOULDN’T EAT IF YOU PAID ME: Bananas INSIDER’S SECRET: Our creamy grits and tasso gravy will change your life!

CELEBRITY SIGHTING: Jimmy Buffett CULINARY GUILTY PLEASURE: Raw oysters and fried clam bellies or white chocolate cranberry bread pudding. cheeses and 40-plus toppings and create your own pizza pie.

Subs, sandwiches, gelato. $$ C L D Daily

INTRACOASTAL WEST

AL’S PIZZA, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 31, 223-0991.

F 2013 BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ C L D Daily CASTILLO DE MEXICO, 12620 Beach Blvd., Ste. 19, 998-7006. F This spot, in business for 15-plus years, has an extensive menu served in authentic Mexican décor.

Weekday lunch buffet. $$ L D Daily EPIK BURGER, 12740 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 105, 374-7326.

F More than 34 burgers made from grass-fed beef, ahi tuna, all-natural chicken; vegan items from innovative recipes; gluten-free options. $ L D Mon.-Sat. LA NOPALERA MEXICAN, 14333 Beach Blvd., 992-1666.

F See San Marco. $$ C L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., 642-6980.

F See Baymeadows. $ C B L D Daily MAHARLIKA HALL & SPORTS GRILL, 14255 Beach Blvd., Ste. E, 699-0759. Filipino-American restaurant and market features pancit bami, lumpia, turon strudle, halo halo with ice cream. $-$$ C R L D Daily MY MOCHI FROZEN YOGURT, 13546 Beach Blvd., Ste. 1A, 821-9880. See St. Johns Town Center. $ Daily TIME OUT SPORTS GRILL, 13799 Beach Blvd., Ste. 5, 223-6999. F Locally-owned-and-operated grill serves hand-tossed pizzas, wings, specialty wraps in a clean, sporty atmosphere. Late-night menu. $$ L Tue.-Sun.; D Nightly

JULINGTON CREEK

PIZZA PALACE, 116 Bartram Oaks Walk, 230-2171. F See San Marco. $$ C L D Daily SAUCY TACO, 450 S.R. 13 N., Ste. 113, 287-8226. F The menu is light Mexican with American influences – and there are 40 beers on draft. $$ C B, Sat.-Sun.; L D Daily

MANDARIN

AL’S PIZZA, 11190 San Jose Blvd., 260-4115. F 2013 BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ C L D Daily ATHENS CAFÉ, 6271 St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 7, 733-1199.

Dolmades (stuffed grape leaves), baby shoes (stuffed eggplant). Greek beers. $$ L Mon.-Fri.; D Mon.-Sat. BRAZILIAN JAX CAFE, 9825 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 20, 880-3313. F Authentic steaks, sausages, chicken, burgers, fish, hot sandwiches made with fresh ingredients. $$ B L D Mon.-Sat. BROOKLYN PIZZA, 11406 San Jose Blvd., 288-9211.

13820 St. Augustine Rd., Bartram Park, 880-0020.

F The Brooklyn Special Pizza is a customer fave. Calzones, white pizza, homestyle lasagna. $$ L D Daily GIGI’S RESTAURANT, 3130 Hartley Rd. (Ramada Inn), 694-4300. F Prime rib & crab leg buffet Fri.-Sat., blue-jean brunch Sun., daily breakfast, lunch, dinner buffets. $$$ B R L D Daily LA NOPALERA, 11700 San Jose Blvd., 288-0175. F See San Marco. $$ C L D Daily LARRY’S, 11365 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 3, 674-2945. F See Baymeadows. $ C B L D Daily RACK ’EM UP BILLIARDS, 4268 Oldfield Crossing Dr., 262-4030. See Arlington. $ R Sat.-Sun.; D Nightly RENNA’S PIZZA, 11111 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 12, 292-2300. F Casual New York-style pizzeria serves calzones, antipasto, parmigiana, homemade breads. Buy a slice – humongous – or full pie. Delivery. $$ C L D Daily

ORANGE PARK, MIDDLEBURG

ARON’S PIZZA, 650 Park Ave., 269-1007. F Familyowned restaurant has eggplant dishes, manicotti, New York-style pizza. $$ C L D Daily THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Road, 272-5959. Specialties at this upscale restaurant include New Orleans shrimp, certified Black Angus prime rib, she-crab soup. Homemade desserts. $$$ D Tue.-Sat. LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1930 Kingsley Ave., 276-2776. F See San Marco. $$ C L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 700 Blanding, Ste. 15, 272-3553.

1545 C.R. 220, 278-2827. 1330 Blanding, 276-7370. 1404 S. Orange Ave., Green Cove Springs, 284-7789. F See

28 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

teriyaki. Dine indoors or on the patio. $$ L D Daily

ST. AUGUSTINE

Baymeadows. $ C B L D Daily PREVATT’S SPORTS BAR & GRILL, 2620 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 17, Middleburg, 282-1564. F What a neighborhood sportsbar should be: Familiar fare, all the spirits you’d want. $$ C L D Daily RENNA’S PIZZA, 6001 Argyle Forest Blvd., Ste. 16, 771-7677. F See Mandarin. $$ C L D Daily TED’S MONTANA GRILL, 8635 Blanding Blvd., 771-1964.

See St. Johns Town Center. $$$ C L D Daily THAI GARDEN, 10 Blanding Blvd., Ste. B, 272-8434.

Traditional Thai: pad kraw powh with roasted duck, kaeng kari (yellow curry, potatoes, choice of meat). Fine wines, imported, domestic beers. $$ L Mon.-Fri.; D Nightly

PONTE VEDRA, NW ST. JOHNS

ALICE & PETE’S PUB, 1000 PGA Tour Blvd., Sawgrass Marriott, 285-7777. Inspired by Sawgrass course designers Alice and Pete Dye. Local flavors and Alice & Pete’s favorites: Dominican black bean soup, Pete’s Designer club sandwich. Outside dining. $$$ L D Daily AL’S PIZZA, 635 A1A, 543-1494. F 2013 BOJ winner.

See Beaches. $ C L D Daily JJ’S LIBERTY BISTRO, 330 A1A N., Ste. 209, 273-7980.

Traditional French cuisine: escargot, paté, steak frites, crêpes. Specials, pastries; French wines. $$ L D Mon.-Sat. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 830 A1A N., Ste. 6, 273-3993. F See Baymeadows. $ C B L D Daily RESTAURANT MEDURE, 818 A1A N., 543-3797. Chef David Medure creates dishes with international flavors. The lounge offers small plates, creative drinks. $$$ D Mon.-Sat. TABLE 1, 330 A1A N., Ste. 208, 280-5515. Upscale, casual restaurant offers appetizers, salads, sandwiches, flatbreads, burgers, entrées. Extensive wine list. $$$ L D Daily

RIVERSIDE, FIVE POINTS, WESTSIDE

AL’S PIZZA, 1620 Margaret St., Ste. 201, 388-8384. F 2013 BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ C L D Daily BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 869 Stockton St., Stes.

1-2, 855-1181. F 2013 BOJ winner. Bold Bean brings a small-batch, artisanal approach to roasting coffee. Organic and fair trade coffees. $ B L Daily GINA’S DELICATESSEN, 1325 Cassat Ave., 353-9903. Inside Duval Honda showroom. Mediterranean-style sandwiches, salads. Authentic New Orleans-style beignets, café au lait with chicory. $ B L Daily GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET 2007 Park St., 384-4474. F 2013 BOJ winner. Juice bar uses certified organic fruits, vegetables. Three dozen artisanal cheeses, 300-plus craft, imported beers, 50 organic wines, organic produce, meats, vitamins, herbs. Organic wraps, sides, sandwiches, salads to go; raw, vegan items. $ B L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1509 Margaret St., 674-2794.

7859 Normandy Blvd., 781-7600. 5733 Roosevelt Blvd., 446-9500. 8102 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 1, 779-1933. F See Baymeadows. $ C B L D Daily MOON RIVER PIZZA, 1176 Edgewood Ave. S., Murray Hill, 389-4442. F Northern-style pizzas, more than 20 toppings, by the pie or the slice. $ L D Mon.-Sat. THE MOSSFIRE GRILL, 1537 Margaret St., Riverside, 355-4434. Southwestern menu with ahi tuna tacos, goat cheese enchiladas, gouda quesadillas, chicken enchiladas.

Indoor or patio dining. $$ C L D Daily O’BROTHERS IRISH PUB, 1521 Margaret St., 854-9300.

F Traditional Irish fare: shepherd’s pie with Stilton crust, Guinness mac-n-cheese, fish-n-chips. Outdoor patio dining. $$ C L D Daily SAKE HOUSE #1 JAPANESE GRILL SUSHI BAR, 824 Lomax St., 301-1188. F Traditional Japanese cuisine, fresh sushi, sashimi, kiatsu, teriyaki, hibachi in an authentic atmosphere. Sake. A real tatami room; outside seating. $$ L D Daily SUN-RAY CINEMA, 1028 Park St., 359-0049. F Beer (Bold City, Intuition Ale Works), wine, pizza, hot dogs, hummus, sandwiches, popcorn, nachos, brownies. $$ Daily SUSHI CAFÉ, 2025 Riverside Ave., Ste. 204, 384-2888.

F Sushi: popular Monster Roll, Jimmy Smith Roll, Rock-n-Roll and Dynamite Roll. Hibachi, tempura, katsu,

AL’S PIZZA, 1 St. George St., 824-4383. F 2013 BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ C L D Daily BACK 40 URBAN CAFÉ, 40 S. Dixie Hwy., 824-0227. F Owner Brian Harmon serves Caribbean-flavored items – wraps, upside-down chicken potpie, fresh, local seafood – in an 1896 building. Wi-Fi. $ C L Sun.; L D Mon.-Sat. CARMELO’S MARKETPLACE & PIZZERIA, 146 King St., 494-6658. F New York-style brick-oven-baked pizza, fresh sub rolls, Boar’s Head meats, cheeses, garlic herb wings.

Outdoor seating, Wi-Fi. $$ L D Daily THE FLORIDIAN, 39 Cordova St., 829-0655. Updated Southern fare, with fresh, local ingredients from area farms.

Vegetarian, gluten-free options. Signature items: fried green tomato bruschetta, blackened fish, cornbread stack, grits with shrimp, fish or tofu. $$$ C L D Wed.-Mon. GYPSY CAB COMPANY, 828 Anastasia Blvd., Anastasia Island, 824-8244. F A mainstay for 25 years; menu changes daily. Signature dish is Gypsy chicken. Seafood, tofu, duck, veal. $$ R Sun.; L D Daily THE HYPPO, 15 Hypolita St., 217-7853 (popsicles only).

1765 Tree Blvd., Ste. 5, 342-7816. F Popsicles of unique flavors, of premium ingredients. Coffee pour-overs, coldbrew coffees. Handcrafted sandwiches, salads. $ Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 410 Anastasia Blvd., 826-4040. F See Beaches. Bite Club certified.

2013 BOJ winner. $ C L D Daily MOJO OLD CITY BBQ, 5 Cordova St., 342-5264. F 2013 BOJ winner. Funky Southern blues kitchen offers pulled pork, Carolina-style barbecue, chicken-fried steak, Delta fried catfish. $$ C B L D Daily THE ORIGINAL CAFÉ ELEVEN, 501 A1A Beach Blvd., St. Augustine Beach, 460-9311. F Coffee drinks, vegetarian meals, meaty Southern comfort dishes. $ B L D Daily PACIFIC ASIAN BISTRO, 159 Palencia Village Dr., 305-2515. F 2013 BOJ winner. Chef Mas created 30+ unique sushi rolls; fresh sea scallops, Hawaiian-style poke tuna salad. $$ L D Daily

ST. JOHNS TOWN CENTER

BLACKFINN AMERICAN GRILLE, 4840 Big Island Dr., 345-3466. Classic American fare: beef, seafood, pasta, flatbread sandwiches. Dine indoors or on the patio. $$$ C R L D Daily BRIO TUSCAN GRILLE, 4910 Big Island Dr., 807-9960.

Upscale Northern Italian restaurant offers wood-grilled, oven-roasted steaks, chops, seafood. Dine indoors or al fresco on the terrace. $$$ C R Sat. & Sun.; L D Daily M SHACK, 10281 Midtown Pkwy., 642-5000. F 2013 BOJ winner. See Beaches. $$ L D Daily MY MOCHI FROZEN YOGURT, 4860 Big Island Dr., Ste. 2, 807-9292. Non-fat, low-calorie, cholesterol-free frozen yogurts. More than 40 toppings. $ Daily OVINTE, 10208 Buckhead Branch Dr., 900-7730. 2013 BOJ winner. Comfortable, chic place features tapas, small plates of Spanish, Italian flavors: ceviche fresco, pappardelle bolognese, lobster ravioli. 240-bottle wine list, 75 by the glass; craft spirits. Outdoor dining. $$ R, Sun.; D Nightly RENNA’S PIZZA, 4624 Town Crossing Dr., Ste. 125, 565-1299. F See Mandarin. $$ C L D Daily SEASONS OF JAPAN, 4413 Town Center Pkwy., 329-1067.

Casual-style restaurant serves Japanese and hibachi-style fare, sushi, quick-as-a-wink. $$ C L D Daily TED’S MONTANA GRILL, 10281 Midtown Pkwy., 998-0010.

Modern classic comfort food featuring finest cuts of bison, including signature steaks and award-winning gourmet burgers, served with timeless, genuine hospitality. Crab cakes, cedar-plank salmon, fresh vegetables, signature desserts, private label Bison Ridge wines. $$$ C L D Daily

SAN JOSE, LAKEWOOD

EMPEROR’S GENTLEMAN’S CLUB 4923 University Blvd.

W., Lakewood, 739-6966. Upscale steakhouse features steaks, burgers, seafood and wings. $$ L D Daily FUSION SUSHI, 1550 University Blvd. W., Lakewood, 636-8688. F New upscale sushi spot serves fresh sushi, sashimi, hibachi, teriyaki, kiatsu. $$ C L D Daily MOJO BAR-B-QUE, 1607 University Blvd. W., San Jose, 732-7200. F 2013 BOJ winner. Funky Southern blues kitchen offers pulled pork, Carolina-style barbecue, chickenfried steak, Delta fried catfish. $$ C B L D Daily URBAN ORGANICS, 5325 Fairmont St., Spring Park, 398-8012. Weekly coop every Monday that offers local, fresh fruits and vegetables in bags of 10, 20 or 30 pounds.

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK, ST. NICHOLAS

BASIL THAI & SUSHI, 1004 Hendricks Ave., 674-0190.

F Pad Thai, curry dishes, sushi, served in a relaxing

environment. Dine indoors or on the patio. $$ L D Mon.-Fri., D Sat. PIZZA PALACE 1959 San Marco Blvd., 399-8815. F Relaxed, family-owned place serves homestyle cuisine: spinach pizza, chicken spinach calzones. Ravioli, lasagna, parmigiana. Outside dining. $$ C L D Daily THE GROTTO WINE & TAPAS BAR, 2012 San Marco Blvd., 398-0726. Varied tapas menu of artisanal cheese plates, empanadas, bruschettas, homestyle cheesecake. More than 60 wines by the glass. $$$ Tue.-Sun. LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1631 Hendricks Ave., 399-1768. F Tamales, fajitas and pork tacos are customer favorites. Some La Nops offer a full bar. $$ C L D Daily MATTHEW’S, 2107 Hendricks Ave., 396-9922. Chef Matthew Medure’s flagship restaurant offers fine dining in a refined, European-style atmosphere. Artfully presented cuisine, small plates, extensive martini and wine lists.

Reservations recommended. $$$$ D Mon.-Sat. PULP, 1962 San Marco Blvd., 396-9222. Juice bar has fresh juices, frozen yogurt, teas, coffees made one cup at a time. 30 smoothies, some blended with flavored soy milks, organic frozen yogurts, granola. $ B L D Daily SAKE HOUSE #2 JAPANESE GRILL SUSHI BAR, 1478 Riverplace Blvd., 306-2188. F See Riverside. $$ L D Daily

SOUTHSIDE

360° GRILLE IN LATITUDE 30, 10370 Philips Hwy., 365-5555. F Familiar sportsbar favorites: seafood, steaks, sandwiches, burgers, chicken, pasta, pizza. Dine inside or on the patio. $$ L D Daily ALHAMBRA THEATRE & DINING, 12000 Beach Blvd., 641-1212. America’s longest continuously running dinner theater features Executive Chef DeJuan Roy’s menus coordinated with stage productions. Reservations suggested. $$ D Tue.-Sun. BUCA DI BEPPO, 10334 Southside Blvd., 363-9090.

Popular chain restaurant has fresh Italian cooking: lasagna, garlic mashed potatoes; three portion sizes (half-pound meatballs!) served family-style. $$$ C L D Daily CASA MARIA, 14965 Old St. Augustine Rd., 619-8186.

F See Springfield. $ C L D Daily FARAH’S PITA STOP CAFÉ, 3980 Southside Blvd., Ste. 201, 928-4322. Middle Eastern cuisine: fresh sandwiches, soups, entrées, desserts, pastries and mazas (appetizers). $ C B L D Mon.-Sat. JJ’s BISTRO DE PARIS, 7643 Gate Pkwy., Ste. 105, 996-7557. Authentic French cuisine served in a comfortable, charming setting. The scratch kitchen has fresh soups, stocks, sauces, pastries. $$ C L D Mon.-Sat. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 3611 St. Johns Bluff S., 641-6499. 4479 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., 425-4060. F See Baymeadows. BOJ winner. $ C B L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 9734 Deer Lake Court, Ste. 1, Tinseltown, 997-1955. F See Beaches.

Bite Club certified. 2013 BOJ winner. $ C L D Daily OISHII, 4375 Southside Blvd., Ste. 4, 928-3223.

Japanese fusion cuisine: fresh, high-grade sushi, a variety of lunch specials, hibachi items. $$ C L D Daily SEVEN BRIDGES GRILLE & BREWERY, 9735 Gate Pkwy.

N., Tinseltown, 997-1999. F Grill and brewery features local seafood, steaks, pizzas, award-winning freshly brewed ales, lagers. Dine indoors or outdoors. $$ L D Daily TAVERNA YAMAS, 9753 Deer Lake Court, 854-0426.

Bite Club certified. 2013 BOJ winner. This Greek restaurant serves char-broiled kabobs, seafood, traditional Greek wines and desserts. Nightly belly dancing. $$ C L D Daily TOMMY’S BRICK OVEN PIZZA, 4160 Southside Blvd., Ste. 2, 565-1999. F New York-style thin crust, brickoven-cooked pizzas – gluten-free – as well as calzones, salads, sandwiches made fresh to order, using Thumann’s no-MSG meats, Grande cheeses. Boylan’s soda. Curbside pick-up. $$ L D Mon.-Sat.

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

CASA MARIA, 12961 N. Main St., Ste. 104, 757-6411.

F Family-owned-and-operated spot offers authentic Mexican food: fajitas, seafood dishes, hot sauces made in-house. Specialty is tacos de asada. $ C L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 12001 Lem Turner, 764-9999.

F See Baymeadows. $ C B L D Daily RENNA’S PIZZA, 840 Nautica Dr., Ste. 117, 714-9210.

F See Mandarin. $$ C L D Daily SAVANNAH BISTRO, 14670 Duval Rd., 741-4404. F Low Country Southern fare, with a twist of Mediterranean and French, in a relaxing atmosphere at Crowne Plaza Airport.

Crab cakes, New York strip, she crab soup, mahi mahi.

Rainforest Lounge. $$$ C B L D Daily STICKY FINGERS, 13150 City Station Dr., 309-7427.

F See Baymeadows. $$ C L D Daily

ASTROLOGY

ARIES (March 21-April 19): In her TED talk, science writer Mary Roach made it clear that human beings don’t need genital stimulation to have orgasms. She spoke of a woman who routinely reaches ecstatic climax by having her eyebrows caressed, and another woman who reaches the big O by simply brushing her teeth. Then there’s the woman who can just think herself into the “little death,” no physical touch needed. The days ahead could bring you as close as you’ve ever been to that. You’re a connoisseur of deep pleasure – a blessed bliss master.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): “The fact that someone else loves you doesn’t rescue you from the project of loving yourself,” writes blogger Sahaj Kohli. Nothing else rescues you from that quest, either, I’d add. Sooner or later, now or 20 years in the future, you’ll have to master this fine art. It’s not enough to merely feel affection for yourself or seek pleasure and avoid pain. You’ve got to make extensive investigations to discover what it means to love yourself and develop rigorous plans how to get there. Fire up a deep commitment as you actually carry out those plans.

The weeks ahead are a great time to work on mastering this fine art.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): “Drunk with my madness, I shouted at him furiously, ‘Make life beautiful! Make life beautiful!’ “ says a character in a prose poem by Charles Baudelaire.

Now, even though I’m not drunk, furious or consumed with madness, I am whispering the same command to you. Embark on a heroic effort to make life beautiful everywhere you go. Astrological omens suggest that if you do, you’ll be inundated with practical blessings as valuable as money. It’s an excellent way to drum up the kind of love you crave.

CANCER (June 21-July 22): During Valentine season, I wish for you to be happily in love with an intimate partner who loves you back. If that’s not feasible, I hope you’re learning provocative lessons about yourself through your growth-inducing relationship with a close ally. And if you’re not blessed with either of those, here’s a third: Cherish your fathomless longing for its own sake, feeling wonder and reverence for its wild power even if it’s unfulfilled.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Making eye contact is essential to build potent links with people you care about. It bypasses rational thought, stimulating chemical reactions in your bodies to enhance empathy and intimacy. In practicing the art of love, it’s one of the most potent moves to make. Valentine season is a perfect time to explore frontiers of what’s possible through prolonged eye contact. Cultivate a sincere desire to know what’s simmering inside the souls of your dearest allies. With that as a driving force, your gaze won’t be clouded by shyness or self-consciousness.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “I prefer an ecstatic orgasm to a lot of angst,” says Filipino artist David Medalla. Consider making that your battle cry during Valentine season. It’d be in rapt harmony with current cosmic omens. There’s no need to get sidelined by anxiety or distracted by stress when the natural remedy is so easily available. In every way you can imagine, fight off sourness and dourness by engaging in acts of joy and pleasure.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): In her poem “Implications of One Plus One,” Marge Piercy marvels at the way she and her long-term partner keep finding new nuances in their love-making.

“Ten years of fitting our bodies together / and still they sing wild songs in new keys,” she writes. What’s their

secret? It’s “timing, chemistry, magic and will and luck.”

What I wish for you this Valentine season is that you have access to all of those as you reinvigorate your relationship to love. More important (based on current cosmic omens) I predict you have access to them.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): Jesuit priest Pedro Arrupe touted the practical value of being totally in love. “What you are in love with, what seizes your imagination, will affect everything,” he said. “It will decide what will get you out of bed in the mornings, how you spend your weekends, what you read, who you know, and what amazes you with joy and gratitude.” Are you in love? With a person, beloved animal, certain patch of land, your creative work or life itself? If not, there’s no excuse! Astrologically speaking, now’s the time to be stupendously in love with someone or something … anything! If you’re already there, trust your intuition to make it smarter and finer.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Borrowing words of Rumi (translated by Coleman Barks), I’ve made a love note for you to use as yours.

Give it to a person whose destiny needs to be woven more closely with yours: “You are the sky my spirit circles in, the love inside love, the resurrection-place.”

Want even more inspirational words to give to your chosen one? Hope so. Be greedy for lyrical bonding. Lust for springy intimacy. Feed the churning yearning. Try saying this, from the book The Last Unicorn: “We are two sides of the same magic.” And say this, paraphrasing Buddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh: “I love you in a way that will always make you feel free.”

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): “People think a soul mate is your perfect fit,” says author Elizabeth Gilbert. “But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back … They tear down your walls and smack you awake … shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you … transform your life.” Is that the kind of person you want? Or do you prefer someone who likes what you like, appreciates you as you are and makes your life more secure and comfortable? This Valentine season is a good time to make or renew a commitment to one or the other. Whatever you decide, you experience it on a richer, deeper level during the next year.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Do you feel oppressed by Valentine’s Day? Maybe you’re single and reject the cultural bias that says being in an intimate relationship is the healthy norm. Or you’re part of a couple but are allergic to the cartoonish caricatures of romance that are everywhere in the marketing assault. If you’d rather consecrate love and intimacy your own way, untainted by stereotypes, rebel. Make this the year you overthrow old ways and start a new tradition: Valentine’s Day 2.0. Mock sappy, sentimental expressions of love as you try futuristic experiments in radically slaphappy love.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): “I have come to be fascinated with the messiness of desire,” writes novelist Ashley Warlick, “with the ways people fit themselves together, take themselves apart for each other, for want of each other, for want of some parts of each other.” So what’s your assignment? I want you to celebrate desire’s messiness this Valentine season, not just accept it as an inconvenience to be tolerated, but marvel at it, be amused by it and appreciate it for its lessons. Your motto is: “I bless the messy largesse of my longing.”

Rob Brezsny freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 29

POWERHOUSE HOTTIE I remember how rough your hand felt on mine as we reached for the same 15-pound dumbbell. I recommended lifting gloves to help keep your hands soft. You liked my Magnum PI-style moustache. You said you may try to grow one. Let’s get together and watch “Silence of the Lambs.”

When: Feb. 2. Where: Powerhouse Gym. #1335-0212 YOU’VE GOT MAIL We were both at the library to check our emails. You must be “without home” like me. Your blonde unkempt hair was appealing. You caught my good eye when you walked in. I’d love to have a cup of recycled coffee with you some day.

I’m available 24/7. When: Feb. 3. Where: Public Library. #1334-0212

ADVERTISING PROOF This is a copyright protected proof © For questions, please call your FAX

SHARK TEETH & T&A You: At the end of the bar with your braid just lying on your advertising representative atchest.

260-9770.

I bought you and your friends a shot but I really just to buy you one. Round two? When: Feb. 5. Where: YOUR PROOF IF POSSIBLE ATwanted 268-3655 Flying Iguana. #1333-0212

RUN DATE:FROZEN 073113 FOODS HOTTIE

BENEFIT

SUPPORT

ASK FOR ACTION

Produced by KL Checked by

NOW HIRING Advertising Account Manager

You: Green pants, white shirt, brown boots, beautiful black hair. Me: Tall, slim, blue shirt, curly Afro. I see you in Sales Repfoods STsection on your lunch hour sometimes. the frozen You look like you just know how to own life. Teach me how? When: Jan. 22. Where: Winn-Dixie, Edgewood & Commonwealth. #1332-0212 BEAUTIFUL LADY IN BROWN HAT ISU at Bonefi sh Grill having drinks with a girlfriend and we made eye-to-eye contact numerous times. You wore a large rimmed brown hat and a long plaid skirt. I had on a gold shirt with a green vest. Would love to have dinner together at Bonefish. Hope to hear from you. When: Jan. 28. Where: Bonefish Grill. #1331-0205 NEED A BRUSH Saw you at Bento. You were confidently comfortable in your underarmor and ruffled hair. You paid for my shrimp tempura. Meet me under the two paintings Feb. 14 at 11 p.m. When: Feb. 1. Where: Bento. #1330-0205 WE LOCKED EYES You parked grey pickup by Walgreen’s.

You walked by, looked; we locked eyes. I was driving metallic SUV. We spoke, flirted, smiled. You left, I went behind Walgreens. You still there; locked eyes again. Still looking, you drove off. We honked horns. Me: Black female.

You: White male. Let’s see where it goes. When: 3 p.m. Dec. 22. Where: Walgreen’s parking lot, Normandy. #1329-0129 ADVENTURE LANDING BASKETBALL DAD You: Handsome dad of teen shooting hoops near the snack area. Me: Mom of birthday boy. Lots of eye contact. Hoping for more! When: Jan. 17. Where: Adventure Landing/ Blanding Blvd. #1328-0129 IN LINE AT WALGREENS You: Tall, handsome, beard, shopping with young daughter. Me: Blue-eyed brunette, ponytails, ballcap, black workout gear behind you in line. We made eye contact. Hope it was your daughter’s presence, not my lack of makeup, that kept you from saying, “Hi.” When: Jan. 18. Where: Walgreens @ C.R. 210 & C.R. 2209. #1327-0122

YOU ARE:

Learn more about the position:

A motivated, enthusiastic, We offer training in media sales and college graduate or have a have an attractive commission structure minimum 2+ years successful with benefits and 401K. outside sales experience.

Folio Weekly is an Equal Opportunity Employer

Please e-mail your resume to: Sam Taylor staylor@folioweekly.com

30 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014

BRIGHT YELLOW HEELS You: Tall brunette at Target on San Jose/295 on 19 Jan.; short black dress, black tights. Your bright yellow heels caught my eye. You checked out faster than I did; I couldn’t catch up in the parking lot. Me: Tall, in a blue hat. We made eye contact right before you checked out.

When: Jan. 19. Where: Target on San Jose/295. #1326-0122

RED DRESS BISTRO AIX Me: Awesome. You: Decent, in a red dress. Called you a name starting with “J.” You left. Let’s do it again. When: January 11. Where: Bistro Aix. #1325-0115 DOES THE BODY GOOD You in your sexy black uniform. Me in my Green Bay shirt.

I want to work you out sometime. Please? When: Jan. 5.

Where: Lynch’s Irish Pub. #1324-0108 SEXY SHOES AT PUBLIX You: Super classy blonde waiting at pharmacy. Me: Tall guy feeling electricity between us! I had to wait and had a seat. You were leaving and walked my way smiled and said “good luck”. I said “nice shoes” and then enjoyed the view as you walked away. Let’s talk! When: Dec. 29, 2013.

Where: Publix @ University Blvd. #1323-0108 YOU FOLLOWED ME OUTSIDE Me: Girl by myself. You: With friends dancing. You offered to buy me drink, I was drinking water, you followed me outside and asked for my #, I told you I was leaving for VA Monday.

Should have given you my #, don’t want to start the New Year by being afraid. I’m in Daytona for a month. When: Dec. 27, 2013. Where: Ragtime. #1322-0108 WATCHING THE STEERS GAME Your legs blew me away from Jags during season’s last week. Me: black pullover, black pants, bald. You can get me in shape for any kind of marathon. SWM Southside, enjoy sports, cooking, walking the beach. Rest you legs on my lap anytime, as we sit by candlelight and watch NYE ball drop.

Happy New Year! When: Dec. 29. Where: Mudville Grille @ St. Nicholas. #1321-0108 BLACK CROWES BEAUTY You: Brown-eyed, dark-haired American Indian-looking goddess. Me: Tall, dark, brooding musician. Talked after the show. You admired my Crowes tat, I admired your cheekbones. Best dancer in venue, and kind conversationalist. Shared tequila after the show. Heard you’re single. Let’s get together. When: Oct. 7. Where: St. Augustine. #1320-1218 DURING JAGUARS 3RD WIN IN 11 DAYS! You: orange shirt, being a good dad taking your son to the game. Me: waiting on ramp. We had INTENSE eye contact, but could only chat for a minute. Have any kid-free time coming up? When: Dec. 5. Where: Jags Game. #1319-1218 MARGARITA MADNESS! Are YOU the guy at La Nopalera Third Street months ago?

You nearly fell off the stool when I asked if you were just passing through. Fun night! Laughter, good-natured teasing.

Loved your sense of humor; think you liked mine. Future connection? Me: Cute blonde English girl. When: Early Summer. Where: La Nopalera Jax Beach. #1318-1218 AVENUES MALL You wore a baby blue zip-up uniform well; sexy black frame glasses; some sort of pouch. Your personality shined through your gleaming smile. You were helpful with my phone troubles; confident – I like a man with confidence. Me: brown hair, brown eyes, black shirt, scarf. Hope this makes it to you. When: Nov. 22. Where: Avenues Mall AT&T. #1317-1218 BEAUTIFUL BLONDE Hi K_, I introduced myself when you sat across the bar. We made eye contact numerous times and observed some funny people in the bar. I’d love to get together, see if we have chemistry. My name starts with T. When: Nov. 14. Where: Jacksonville Ale House. #1316-1204

NEWS OF THE WEIRD

FOLIO WEEKLY PUZZLER by Merl Reagle. Presented by

Perspective

PONTE VEDRA SAN MARCO SOUTHSIDE AVONDALE AVENUES MALL 2044 SAN MARCO BLVD. THE SHOPPES OF PONTE VEDRA 3617 ST. JOHNS AVE. 330 A1A NORTH 10300 SOUTHSIDE BLVD. 398-9741 388-5406 280-1202 394-1390

Beatles, on the Flip Side ACROSS 1 Hatcher or Polo 5 Like most of the world 10 Site of many ANA landings 15 Kin of jeepers 19 Part of A.A. Milne 20 Dry, in Italian 21 Without ___ in the world 22 The bouncing bawl?

23 Beatles flip side about a breakup?

25 Beatles flip side about an interior decorator?

27 “Full House” co-star 28 Young ___ 30 Alphabet chunk that’s a name 31 Capacitance unit 32 Beatles flip side about how Whistler got the idea to paint his mother?

36 Twain’s Polly et al.

38 Phone line: abbr.

39 Proto finish 40 Early sitcom star 41 Silly-walking Python 43 Tower city dweller 45 Headquarters: abbr.

46 Setup 50 Unfast track?

51 Beatles flip side about Wagner’s first rule of opera-composing?

55 Prior to, in “The Prioress’s Tale” 56 Standard Oil, once 58 Settling-into-the-tub sounds 59 Cow of renown 60 1960s activist Jerry Rubin, for one 62 Lobby announcement 64 Fr. title of respect 65 Gangland gun 67 Inexperienced 68 With 71 Across, Beatles flip side about how Newt Gingrich used to see himself?

71 See 68 Across 73 Goodman’s music 1

2

3

4

5

19

74 75 76 77 79 81 82 86 87 91 92 94 95 96 98 100 101 103 104 110 111 112 113 114 117 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

Hosp. tubes Press addition Per-unit charge Cheese with tiny holes Giraffe’s cousin Objecting word Rapid transit, once Joining word Beatles flip side about, like, where Big Brother is?

Try to win over Car mirror view Hog’s home House Speaker, 1989-95 Another mouth ___ With O, a refrain ___-de-sac Bird word “___ this house ...”

Beatles flip side about a shoe salesman?

One in dreadlocks Man’s nickname Mr. Mineo Black ___ Beatles flip side about having the flu?

Beatles flip side about plain Jane’s best friend?

Just inches from Got an eyeful of “Stop ___ shoot!” ___ instant Liberal pursuits Saclike structures With 118 Down, an Italian refrain Printed matter

69 Margaret Thatcher’s 12 Singer LaBelle middle name 13 Get ___ (deal with 70 White shade eventually) 71 Bay window 14 Photog’s original 72 “___ Joe’s” 15 Batter’s imperative 73 Sirius is one 16 Earth hue 75 Sustains 17 Cut ewe down?

78 Channel-surfing need 18 Marauding mob 80 Terrible 24 1992 Wimbledon 81 “It Had to ___” champ 83 Port, for example 26 Salamanders 84 Digits 29 Hefty 85 Puts in, as turf 33 Vendor shows 88 The science of origins 34 Pure sounds 89 Dyes again 35 ___ and the 90 Zero people Pacemakers 93 Flat people 36 Land parcel 97 “Put the pedal to the 37 Eskimo knives metal!”

42 Level, in Lille 99 Foreign-wd. type 44 Plant parts 100 Victorian’s secret?

45 Casino target 102 Deviser of “double47 Beat back think” 48 Movie mermaid 104 A “Three Sisters” sister 49 Hammer part 105 Communion bread 52 “___ was 17 ...”

106 Take ___ (get comfy) 53 Swedish actress 107 Long, hard trips Hasso 108 Jonathan Swift brute 54 Really in sync, as a 109 Girl, to Gide band 115 Spot: abbr.

57 Blooms 116 Grid gains: abbr.

61 Gets nosy 118 See 127 Across 63 Texas A&M player 119 Income bite 64 Like a perfume scent 120 Little worker 66 Play rhythm guitar 68 Strong string Solution to The Darkside

DOWN Keg insert Urban carriers Movie munchies Rashly In ___ (worried) Boil Like some stares Go ___ (date, countrystyle) Predicate parts Bender Common Spanish surname

M E A X J E C

6

7

32

51 57 62

43

14

87

65

66

L A N A

A C Y D S C L

W O L F

S O T L A O G

K O O K

E Z R A

Tyler Smith, 23, was charged in December with violating the city animal care ordinance in Greenville, S.C., after a photograph was posted on Facebook of his father’s dog being lowered by rope from the second-story balcony of an apartment.

According to the posting, it was time for the dog to make a call of nature, but it was raining, and Smith preferred not to go downstairs with him.

Chuck Shepherd weirdnews@earthlink.net

S O N Y

16

17

18

47

48

49

84

85

119

120

55 61

67

81

82

89

90 96

101

102

108

83 91

97 103

109

112 116

P R I S O N

World’s Laziest Dog Sitter

72

80

111

E A R T H S

From the birth register of Elkhart, Ind., General Hospital, reported by The Elkhart Truth, Jan. 19, 2014: “Tamekia Burks, Elkhart, daughter (named La’Soulja Major La’Pimp Burks, 6 lbs., 8 oz.), 3:20 p.m. Wednesday, Jan. 15, 2014.”

76

100

110

54 60

107

B E A L E

46

95

106

P U P P E T

E O N

15

45

88

99

A N O X

E X A C T S

Interesting Life Ahead

35

75

94

D O R O T H Y

L K U P I X A T U S P E R T A Y E A P E N U V U S P I R E L A E S N P A D K N O U A F P R A S A N D WO O T D U R T B OW T N O

The French social security agency URSSAF initiated an enforcement action in December against the Mamm-Kounifl music bar in the town of Locmiquelic for underpaying employee contributions — in that the tavern encourages customers to bus their own tables and thus reduces its need to hire more servers. The owner denied he was trying to save money. “It’s [just] our trademark. We want the customer to feel comfortable, a bit like he’s at home.”

31

71

79

E L Y S E E

Labor’s Influence in France

40

64

78

105

H E A P

B U R G S

South Korea is a well-known hub for cosmetic beautification surgery, with a higher rate per capita than the U.S., but the procedures can be expensive, inspiring many young women recently to resort to do-it-yourself procedures for their professional and romantic upgrades.

A December Global Post dispatch noted some might try to force their eyes to stay open without blinking (using a novel $20 pair of glasses for hours on end) as a substitute for costly “double-eyelid” surgery. Also in use: a $6 jaw-squeezing roller device for the face to push the jaw line into a fashionable “oval” form. One teen told the reporter she applies an imaginative contraption to her face for hours a day to pressure her nose into more of a point, which is considered a desirable Western look.

In December, thieves in Wicklow, Ireland, raided a convent’s field at the Dominican Farm and Ecology Center, stripping it of its entire crop of Brussels sprouts. A nun at the farm said the sisters were devastated to miss out on the lucrative market for high-end Christmas dinners. In January, Wal-Mart in China recalled its “Five Spice” donkey meat sold in some locations because the popular snack was found to be tainted — with fox meat.

26

59

74

98

K A O S

A S O I N N G S O T D A C A WB E A T T E H M O A S N E A B S

Cultural Diversity

Acquired Tastes

22

44

70

93

13

R I C A R D O

53

63

73

92

12

O D E

30

52

69

86

11

39

58

77

O M A N I S

N O T S A V O I B E L L R E V U T E M Y R P A O M A M A F U L P R S H A D I T O C L O C O I H Z I N G L O O P Y O F T U L E T A R S T O

34

38 42

68

29

33

37

56

F A V O R S

O T C T A O B S I O A N D L E T T A A S T A A B L E S V E O A T S L A R E E S L L E E O R N S E T S

25 28

50

A H T A F I R

10

24

41

M O O N

21

27

104

9

20

23

36

8

E R I K

Three million Americans are infected with hepatitis C (as are millions more overseas), but a very recent drug, Sovaldi, completely cures it with 84 daily doses. However, its manufacturer, Gilead Sciences, has somehow determined that a fair U.S. price for the drug should be $1,000 per pill ($84,000 for the total treatment). In December, an NPR reporter asked if Gilead should reduce the price once it has recouped its expensive investment. “That’s very unlikely we would do that,” said Gilead’s Gregg Alton, but “I appreciate the thought.” According to NPR, Gilead “developed” Sovaldi merely by buying Sovaldi’s actual developer for $11 billion. At $84,000 per patient, Gilead would “recoup” that investment from the first 150,000 customers, leaving 2.85 million more U.S. patients to pay $84,000 each, for an income of $239 billion.

113

114

115

117

118

121

122

123

124

125

126

127

128

FEBRUARY 12-18, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 31