Folio Weekly 06/04/14

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CONTENTS //

EDITOR’S NOTE

JUNE 4-10, 2014 • VOLUME 28 • NUMBER 10

NUDE BEACH? MEH. DOG BEACH? YES!

S

26

34 MAIL NEWS FIGHTIN’ WORDS 2 MINUTES WITH

5 6 7 8

PET LOVERS OUR PICKS MUSIC THE KNIFE

10 24 26 30

MOVIES MAGIC LANTERNS ARTS BITE-SIZED

06 33 36 38 40

I SAW U ASTROLOGY NEWS OF THE WEIRD BACKPAGE

44 44 45 47

Cover Design: Shan Stumpf PUBLISHER • Sam Taylor staylor@folioweekly.com / ext. 111

EDITORIAL

EDITOR • Jeffrey C. Billman jbillman@folioweekly.com / ext. 115 SENIOR EDITOR • Marlene Dryden mdryden@folioweekly.com / ext. 131 A&E EDITOR • David Johnson djohnson@folioweekly.com / ext. 128 WRITERS-AT-LARGE Susan Cooper Eastman seastman@folioweekly.com Derek Kinner dkinner@folioweekly.com CARTOONIST Tom Tomorrow CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Rob Brezsny, Daniel A. Brown, John E. Citrone, Julie Delegal, AG Gancarski, Nicholas Garnett, Claire Goforth, Janet Harper, Dan Hudak, Shelton Hull, MaryAnn Johanson, Amanda Long, Heather Lovejoy, Nick McGregor, Cameron Meier, Jeff Meyers, Kara Pound, Merl Reagle, Scott Renshaw, Carley Robinson, Chuck Shepherd, Melody Taylor and Abigail Wright

VIDEOGRAPHER • Doug Lewis EDITORIAL INTERNS • Audreyonna Banks, Michaela Gugliotta and Amber Lake

DISTRIBUTION

DESIGN

ADVERTISING

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Bobby Pendexter / cosmicdistributions@gmail.com PUBLISHER Sam Taylor staylor@folioweekly.com / ext. 111 SENIOR ACCOUNT MANAGER CJ Allen callen@folioweekly.com / ext. 120 • Beaches, Ponte Vedra Beach, Amelia Island ACCOUNT MANAGERS Lee Ann Thornton lthornton@folioweekly.com ext. 127 • Mandarin, Orange Park Mary Pennington mpennington@folioweekly.com ext. 125 • Intracoastal West, St. Augustine ACCOUNT MGR. / SPECIAL EVENTS MANAGER Ro Espinosa respinosa@folioweekly.com ext. 129 • Southside, Avondale, Arlington MOBILE APP ADVERTISING ACCOUNT MANAGER Kathrin Lancelle klancelle@folioweekly.com ext. 124 • Downtown, Riverside, Northside, San Marco

Folio Weekly is published every Wednesday throughout Northeast Florida. It contains opinions of contributing writers that are not necessarily the opinion of this publication. Folio Weekly welcomes both editorial and photographic contributions. Calendar information must be received two weeks in advance of event date. Copyright © Folio Publishing, Inc. 2014. All rights reserved. Advertising rates and information are available on request. An advertiser purchases right of publication only. One free copy per person. Additional copies and back issues are $1 each at the office or $4 by U.S. mail, based on availability. First Class mail subscriptions are $48 for 13 weeks, $96 for 26 weeks and $189 for 52 weeks. Please recycle Folio Weekly. Folio Weekly is printed on recycled paper using soy-based inks. 27,000 press run. Audited weekly readership 111,191.

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4 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

o there’s this woman, Angela Anderson, who was all over local news last week because she put a petition on change.org for a clothing-optional 1-mile stretch of Jacksonville Beach. Anderson’s initiative, which had 911 supporters as of last Wednesday — by comparison, the petition last year to rename Nathan B. Forrest High School garnered more than 162,000 — has already been declared DOA by Jax Beach Mayor Charlie Latham, who wants his city to be “family-friendly,” and “family-friendly” means no one wants to see your jiggly bits. Let’s be honest about this: These things are always better in theory than in practice, because the people you fantasize about baring all are generally not the people who actually do. And while I have no prudish qualms with nudity or nude beaches — even if the average visitor is more pear than hourglass — I have a better idea for this oceanfront property: Let’s give it to the dogs. There is no beach around here where unleashed dogs are free to run and play and jump in the water and swim and roll around in the sand and glory in the essence of unfettered dogness. Some area beaches allow dogs, sure, but only on-leash and at certain (and inconvenient) times: Atlantic Beach and Jax Beach, for instance, allow leashed dogs before 9 a.m. and after 5 p.m. I understand why this is: Not everybody who likes beaches likes dogs. There is also the threat of an occasional dog bite (and ensuing litigation), as well as the accumulation of the unpleasant deposits canines leave behind, which, if left uncollected, can render a beach, well, less than picturesque, and, more important, wreak havoc on ecosystems. These are legitimate issues. They are not, however, insurmountable. I’m serious about this — so serious, in fact, that last week I started my own change.org petition (http:// chn.ge/1lRB6dH), which you should all go sign right now. A little context: My family is currently bicoastal. I live and work here. My wife has a job and rents a house in St. Petersburg. Over on St. Pete Beach is one of my favorite spots in the world, Fort De Soto Park, which offers a length of beach north of the pier where humans can bring their dogs and just hang out. No leashes. No asinine time restrictions. The dogs chase and wrestle each other, swim in the breakers, fetch tennis balls, laze about in the sand. There are rules, of course: No aggressive dogs. No dogs in heat. No dogs that don’t respond to voice commands. Pick up after your dog. Don’t leave food lying around. And if you don’t do want your peace disturbed, go to the other side of the pier, where unleashed dogs aren’t permitted. Weekend after weekend, the beach is packed, and there’s no reason we can’t have that here. Quite frankly, the more dogfriendly a beach and its surrounding area, the more likely I am to visit and spend money. And there are a lot of people with furry children just like me. So here again is my petition: http://chn. ge/1lRB6dH. This isn’t the most pressing issue of our time, granted, but signing it will only take a minute. And I’ll take wagging tails over sagging boobs any day of the week. Jeffrey C. Billman twitter/jeffreybillman jbillman@folioweekly.com


MAIL But What About Evaporation?

I would like to make an unscientific reply to Jeffrey C. Billman’s column [Editor’s Note, “Not a Scientist, Man,” May 21]. He rightly says global warming is a science and nobody can dispute that or tries to. I have seen many articles on the subject, with some dialogue on either side of the issue. The problem I have is the way the global warming is presented by a mostly liberal media. They make the problem appear to be immediate, with disastrous results if we don’t act now. Global warming has been going on for at least the last 100 years, and as far as I know, it is escalating more now than it was 100 years ago. I have yet to see anything that tells me that evaporation is not considered in the rise of temperature. I know for a fact that water evaporates faster the hotter the temperature is. Has evaporation even been installed into the equation, or does it not count for anything? Since Billman chose to put two subjects into this column, I would also like to comment on the other part of his theory — that according to Marco Rubio, it is the pro-choice liberals who actually hate science because they deny that life begins at conception. Then Billman goes on to say, “There is a difference between life and personhood.” I can’t find personhood in the dictionary, but I know what he means. Now for another fact: You can’t have one without the other. In other words, you can’t have personhood without life. Therefore, life does begin at conception but can be terminated within seconds, minutes, hours, days, months and even years. That is a fact that cannot be disputed. Art Cape

Intolerant, Self-Righteous, Hitler!

It must be nice to be a progressive. You can propose and pass all the programs you wish and when they fail, blame it on others or propose more. Josip [sic] Stalin played the blame game to great effect with his purge trials, as did Adolf Hitler, Benito Mussolini and Mao Zedong. “If you were a properly committed (choose one — communist, national socialist, fascist, liberal, progressive etc.,) failure would not have occurred. Since it failed, you are not a properly committed communist, national socialist, etc., ergo to the GULAG, Auschwitz, re-education camps, etc.” Yes, Stalin, Hitler, Mussolini and Mao were all progressive idols. Another sin, you could actually be a human being responding to artificial market distortions that progressive programs caused and working within them to improve your own lot, an ultimate abomination to progressives who are, of course, immune to such temptations. Far be it from me to blaspheme and suggest that progressives, including the sainted staff of Folio Weekly, might be motivated by (gag) money. In America, progressives get outraged over any resistance to their proposals and resort to name-calling. Thus, Jeffrey Billman and others refer to Republicans, conservatives and libertarians as cretins, fascists (despite fascism being a progressive program), dangerous right-wing extremists and nutballs, racists and warmongers (despite warfare and violence and its threat being the major means for the accomplishment of the progressive society). I have rarely heard or read anything like that from my side of the spectrum. It’s also odd to hear so many progressives say that it’s not bad to be a communist yet rail at being called one. They can call us all the names they want, yet we can’t respond in kind.

Generally speaking, the most intolerant, smug, self-righteous and condescending people I have ever known have been liberals. Roderick T. Beaman

The Big Question

Ed. note: Every so often, we ask our Facebook friends a question. Every so often, they respond. And every so often, we publish some of those responses in these pages. This week’s question: What is one thing about Northeast Florida that will never make sense to you? “The size of the bugs and general lack of manners. For [this] being ‘the South’ I’ve been steadily disappointed by how rude people are.”

— Kim Maplethorpe

“Die-hard UF fans that have never been to Gainesville, die-hard Bulldog fans that have never been to Athens, die-hard FSU fans that have never been to Tallahassee, die-hard Hurricane fans that have never been to Miami. Why do they all situate in the 904?” — Shaun Salisbury “The drivers! There are some good drivers, for sure, I’m not saying all drivers are bad. They aren’t, but the awful and entitled drivers outweigh them and make the roads dangerous for everyone. Where are these people learning to drive?” — Julie Anderson

“How everyone’s cousin is in either Skynyrd or Limp Biscuit [sic].” — Brian Grant If you would like to respond to something that appeared in Folio Weekly, please send an email with your address and phone number (for verification purposes only) to mail@folioweekly.com.

JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 5


NEWS

THE ARSONIST WHO WASN’T Based on the flimsiest of evidence, Ryan Wilson spent 10 months behind bars. A jury acquitted him in less than 10 minutes

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here was an arsonist on the loose in the northwest Nassau County town of Hilliard in the early months of 2013, and the police and State Fire Marshal’s Office were working mightily to find him. Some of the fires were started in area garages, but most were concentrated in the Eastwood Oaks Apartments on Cody Circle, where at least seven cars had been torched. The cops had little to go on. And then one day in April, a woman named Wendy Goodman walked into the Nassau County Sheriff’s Office with a gift-wrapped suspect whom, she said, had confessed the arsons to her: her ex-boyfriend, Ryan Wilson. Her statement netted her thousands of dollars in reward money, and she would have raked in thousands more had Wilson been convicted. But he wasn’t. Not even close. In fact, after Wilson had spent 10 months in jail awaiting trial, it took a jury less than 10 minutes to declare Wilson not guilty. Since then, Wilson — who loudly proclaimed his innocence during his incarceration — has gone incommunicado. Meanwhile, NCSO officials say they are dismayed at how the trial played out, the prosecutor is declining, in no uncertain terms, to discuss it, and the state’s chief witness is now $6,000 richer, even though jurors apparently didn’t believe anything she said. The case has prompted a lot of unanswered questions, but the verdict, according to assistant public defender Chris Clayton, one of Wilson’s attorneys, was hardly a surprise. Fourth Judicial Circuit prosecutors knew what their witnesses were going to say, she says, and they should have known what the outcome would be. And had they not pressed on anyway, Wilson wouldn’t have been robbed of nearly a year of his life. Even the police reports were loaded with inconsistencies and other problems that should have raised red flags. For instance, police reported that Goodman told them Wilson set fire to a bag of potato chips beneath the front of a car in one of the fires 6 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

at Eastwood Oaks, where Wilson lived. But that same report said that fire marshal’s investigators determined the fire was caused by “ordinary combustibles being placed in the passenger compartment.” Nassau County Undersheriff George Lueders says he was not involved in the investigation, but admits the results of the trial are troubling. “Anytime there’s that amount of deliberation, it does get your attention,” Lueders says, referring to the jury’s quick verdict. Beyond that, it’s difficult to get a sense of why police and prosecutors seized on Goodman’s statement and took such a weak case to trial. No one wants to talk about it.

W

hen the string of arsons broke out, residents of Eastwood Oaks suspected the culprits were up-to-no-good teenagers. “People were concerned,” says apartment manager Anita Higginbotham. Beyond those suspicions, however, the police didn’t have much to go on. Nassau County Sheriff’s officials asked the state Fire Marshal’s office for help. Crimestoppers, the Florida Division of State Fire Marshal and the owners of Eastwood Oaks all offered rewards for information on the fires. Wendy Goodman — who could not be located for this story — answered the call. She told police that Wilson said he set the fires as revenge for various slights. She said Wilson was angry with one female victim, another Eastwood Apartments resident because they had been in a minor car accident in 2012 and Wilson was found at fault. That woman’s 1996 Chevrolet Cavalier burned in late April 2013. A nearby car, a 2005 Ford Mustang, was also destroyed when the fire spread. Wilson, Goodman told the cops, was still pissed off about being blamed for the accident. That much, it seems, is true — and Wilson didn’t try to hide it. The NCSO’s investigating officer, Josh Bass, who is now with the State Fire Marshal’s office, took Goodman’s statement

and eventually arrested Wilson. Under questioning, Wilson agreed he was angry and “confirmed the grudge between [the victim] and himself. He repeatedly brought up the traffic collision with [the victim] stating she was at fault and he was not,” according to the arrest and booking report. Goodman also told police that Wilson and the arson victim had many confrontations after the crash. At trial, however, the victim testified that she and Wilson got along fine, according to Clayton. (Trial transcripts could not be secured by press time.) Goodman also told deputies that Wilson was angry because he was being evicted

“I don’t think there is anything I can say one way or another to justify the prosecution or answer the critics’ questions.” from Eastwood Oaks. That story did have a ring of truth to it, because in 2012, the apartment complex management attempted to evict Wilson and was successful in court. But Wilson didn’t end up losing his home, and there was little reason for animosity. Eastwood Oaks’ owners discovered that Wilson was in a tough spot — he had suffered an injury to his shoulder at work that required two surgeries, and he was waiting for a workers’ comp settlement — and so they struck a deal with him. They agreed to allow him to keep his apartment for minimal payments; once he received the settlement, he would pay the balance. Higginbotham says Wilson was “paying on it” and had no reason to think he would be evicted. (Higginbotham declined to comment

when asked what she told investigators as they gathered evidence for the trial.) The prosecution, Clayton says, knew all that before the trial. They proceeded anyway. “My position is that I am not really inclined to comment on this case,” says assistant state attorney Stephen Siegel, who tried Wilson. “I don’t think there is anything I can say one way or another to justify the prosecution or answer the critics’ questions.” Still, Siegel says he went forward in good faith. “As a prosecutor, I believe in a goodfaith reasonable expectation of truth and proof beyond a reasonable doubt. What I’m trying to say is that as a prosecutor, you adhere to a standard before you charge someone with a crime.” Asked about the inconsistencies in witnesses’ statements from before the trial and then during their actual testimony, Siegel referred questions to Sheriff ’s Office and Fire Marshal investigators. Clayton says she felt terrible for her client, and was glad news of his acquittal would be made public soon. She says that he suffered while he was in jail because he was not allowed to get rehabilitation for his shoulder, which he needed after the surgeries. Even going to court was excruciating because he had to wear a coat. “He had trouble putting on his coat, it was hurting so bad,” Clayton says. Perhaps the most painful, or poignant, moment for her happened when the verdict was read. “He just broke down and cried,” Clayton says. “It was the saddest thing I have ever seen.” Folio Weekly was unable to locate Ryan Wilson for comment for this story. Some acquaintances say that after he was acquitted, he bought a plane ticket and flew to New York to stay with relatives. Others say he’s still in the Nassau County area. “He’s with his people,” Wilson’s aunt, Ruthie Mae Brown, says. “I don’t know. He might be in Fernandina Beach, but I know they [Eastwood Oaks management] put his stuff out on the street.” Brown says she and Wilson, her deceased sister’s son, did not get along because of a long-standing feud, but she is glad he was found not guilty. “Yeah, I’m glad he got off, and though he don’t get along with me, the jury found him not guilty. I agree he was railroaded, but the law is the law.”

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hile the jury’s lightning-fast repudiation was no doubt embarrassing for the prosecutors and police who sought to put Wilson behind bars for as much as 30 years, Undersheriff Lueders points out that after Wilson’s arrest, the arsons stopped. “That’s one thing that’s interesting,” he says. The police, Lueders adds, consider the case dormant. They’re not looking for other suspects. “There’s not really anything we can do about it,” he says. Moreover, neither the sheriff ’s office nor prosecutors are investigating whether Goodman’s testimony constituted perjury. Higginbotham says Eastwood Oaks residents were stunned at the verdict, and began to wonder again if someone is still out there waiting to set more fires. “Really, people were surprised when we found out it wasn’t Ryan,” Higginbotham says. “They’re, like, ‘If he didn’t do it, who did it? Is this going to happen again?’” Derek Kinner dkinner@folioweekly.com


FIGHTIN’ WORDS

THE POLICE STATE WINS Meet Operation Ceasefire, where constitutional protections are smothered by a Manichean narrative

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s I wrote a few weeks ago, April was an especially violent month in Jacksonville: 33 shootings, seven fatal, many apparently in service to the illicit drug distro business [“There Will Be Blood,” May 21]. Luckily — or not, depending on your perspective — the city of Jacksonville believes it has a solution. Operation Ceasefire, as it’s dubbed, involves officers from the Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office visiting 18,000 homes in Northwest Jacksonville’s Zone 5 to put forth a more involved police presence, more robust surveillance and to blur traditional Bill of Rights protections in high-crime areas. The cops will engage citizens in Zone 5 in “consensual conversations,” as Sheriff John Rutherford puts it, though who knows how consensual those convos will actually be? Almost as interesting as what JSO will do, however, is the way Operation Ceasefire was sold — with a press conference on May 20, weeks after the initiative was launched. And the most interesting moment of that press conference — one of unintentional irony — came during Mayor Alvin Brown’s anodyne presentation, when someone’s ringtone sounded with the theme song from The Good, the Bad and the Ugly, which appropriately summed up what Operation Ceasefire ultimately is: a deliberate assembling of a Manichean dualist narrative in which the city marches in lockstep in battle against the “thugs.” We’re mad as hell and we’re not going to take this anymore. Brown delivered nothing more than a chunk of a standard stump speech, speaking with little specificity or conviction about the aggressive, post-Constitutional policing necessary to make this program an enduring success. Rather than talking about the realities of policing in lawless areas, he talked about jobs programs. Somewhat more ingenuous: Sheriff Rutherford, who has sold initiatives like this before — for instance, Operation Safe Streets in 2006, JSO’s response to last decade’s wave of violence, which looked like the current one. Even if you believe that the “walk and knock” approach to connecting with the community that Rutherford advances flies in the face

of the Fourth Amendment, it’s impossible to discount the sheriff’s consistency. And bromides like “you’ve got the amount of crime in your neighborhood that you’re willing to tolerate” strike a chord with the quasibootstrap conservatives in your local planned communities, the ones who turn city elections. The highlight of the event: Councilwoman Denise Lee, candid as always. The crime problem, as she sees it, is constituted by “thugs … who don’t want other people to have quality of life,” and who thrive on “human blight.” Thugs who “have declared war on the community,” who have decided they can do what they want when they want. To combat this menace, there will be “cameras in the most targeted areas” and actions taken against businesses that aid and abet the criminal set. And if recidivists keep on recidivating, no worries: “We’ve just got to put them in jail and keep them there forever.” Operation Ceasefire won’t be a hard sell in Jacksonville. We all imagine ourselves tough on crime, and our media ensures that solutions more complex than “clean up your backyard” will not be discussed. From a public policy standpoint, in which the leaders of political structures both black and white almost invariably ask for aggressive policing, there is no risk. And that in itself is the problem for those who still believe that the ever-expanding police state can be rolled back. Part of the reason the police state always wins is rooted in historic binary oppositions between black and white — the legacy, ultimately, of plantation slavery. JSO undoubtedly will win some battles with Operation Ceasefire. The war, however, will be lost. Without legitimate alternatives to the drug culture to actually make a living in these communities (and unless investors radically change their strategies, this is not likely), young recruits will rise up to fill the slots left by incarcerated gang members. And the law enforcement industry will find ways to monetize the whole process.

We all imagine ourselves tough on crime, and our media ensures that solutions more complex than “clean up your backyard” will not be discussed.

AG Gancarski twitter/aggancarski mail@folioweekly.com JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 7


2 MINUTES WITH … // DENNIS HO

KRISTIN GERHART, DOG GROOMER, BARK Folio Weekly: What kind of training did you need to become a dog groomer? Kristin Gerhart: I went to a grooming academy — mine was in Ponte Vedra — [where] I was taught by a master certified groomer through the National Dog Groomers Association of America, or the NDGAA. I did six months of training with her one-on-one, and now I’m here at Bark. Are you certified? I plan on getting certified through the NDGAA. You don’t actually need any sort of certification or licensing to be a groomer, but the good ones definitely go through some sort of schooling. What does being certified entail? You have to do a written test, and you have to do a practical test. I have a standard poodle who I’m growing out right now so hopefully, in the next year or so, I can get her to a proper length so I can do a practical test with her. It’s kind of a big deal, grooming in front of a judge and having somebody make sure you’re doing everything properly. There are actually grooming competitions, grooming seminars. There’s this whole grooming world that most people don’t know about. What’s breed do you work on most often? I tend to get a lot of Yorkies, and then shih tzus, Maltese. A lot of small dogs. We get a lot of labs for baths, we occasionally get some rare breeds. We’re starting to build our standard poodle clientele. We get a wide variety, but normally we get a lot of little dogs. Explain why dog grooming costs so much more than a person’s haircut. The main thing is, you have to think about [is] the dogs have the whole body being done. With us, it’s just our heads. There’s a chance the dog may not like it, so they’ll squirm. So it’s all about the time it takes to do it, because we don’t want to hurt the dog or rush the dog. You might get bit; they might get scared. We do a full hair bath, a full hair dry, a full hair brushing — it’s a lot more than we do for humans. We do nail trimming, nail painting. So basically it’s like us going to get a haircut, a full manicure, a full pedicure, a full facial, everything involved. So when you think about that, it makes sense. 8 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

What kind of soap do you use? We actually use Dawn. I don’t know what others are putting on their dogs, what chemicals are on their coats, and we don’t want to overdose our animals with chemicals. How often should people get their dogs groomed? It depends on the dog. We recommend four to six weeks for most dogs, because it helps the owner maintain the coat easier. Every dog is different. Every owner’s different, too. Some like to keep their dog’s coats really long, and some dogs will come in weekly. When did you know you wanted to be a groomer? In high school. I wanted to be a hairdresser first. I went to UNF and got a BFA in photography, and I’ve always loved dogs. I was working at a dog kennel then, and dogs were my main concentration in photography. I knew I didn’t want to be a vet because I cry when I see an animal in pain, and so I was, like, “Well, what else can I do where I can be around dogs?” And I already knew I liked hair, so I contacted a dog groomer and she geared me toward the right training. It just stuck. Do you think you have an easy job? It’s a very tough job. People don’t realize that. You’re on your feet all day long, you have dogs that are scared, they may not like having it done so they may try to bite you, they’ll poop or pee on your table. It’s just trying to work with them. Plus I have sharp scissors and I’m working with a dog that’s moving around. It’s not like telling a human, “Hey, can you stand still, please?” With a dog, if they see something, they’re moving. What’s the oldest dog you’ve worked on? I’ve had a dog that was 17. Sometimes I tell owners that after a certain age and they’re getting stressed out here to bring them in less often, just because you don’t want to stress out an old dog. Is cat grooming a real thing? I did it one time and I’ll never do it again. Dogs are easier to cut because their skin is softer, and a lot of cats don’t like being groomed, and I don’t like the feeling of cat scratches and cat bites. Dennis Ho dho@folioweekly.com


JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 9


1st Place

OK

, we get it. You all — like, every single one of you — think your dog/cat/fish/pig/squirrel/rabbit/whatever is the cutest damn thing in Northeast Florida, and deserving of the top prize in our inaugural Pet Lovers’ Issue Photo Contest. Last week, we had the heady and arduous task of siphoning through the 500-plus photos – maybe more; at some point our eyes glazed over – you guys submitted through email or on Instagram and Twitter, painstakingly scrutinizing them according to our carefully crafted and entirely subjective criteria (photo composition, general adorableness and what we thought would look decent in newsprint, which, well, not a lot of photos you take with your phone do). From there, we winnowed our pool down to finalists – the few dozen photos that grace the ensuing pages. And after that, after much consternation and heated inter-office arguments (seriously, you wouldn’t believe our art director’s temper), our vaunted and erudite and not-at-all inebriated selection committee settled on our three victors (and a fourth we deemed worthy of honorable mention). If your furry child didn’t make the cut, well, sorry, guys, but this isn’t T-ball. Not everyone gets a trophy. (Our winners, however, will receive prizes; see facing page.) As you ooh and ahhh and awww your way through these pics, you’ll also find our compendium of most everything Northeast Florida pet lovers need to know: pet stores, day care and boarding facilities, rescue and adoption groups, trainers and groomers, vets and emergency services, dog parks and more, assembled as always by our incomparable senior editor, Marlene Dryden. We love our pets, and we want them to be healthy and happy; our Pet Lovers’ Issue gives you the resources to do just that. Plus, pictures that will melt your heart. — Jeffrey C. Billman

10 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

2nd Place

3rd Place


PET STORES & RETAIL CATOPIA

1078 Ninth St. S., Jax Beach, 242-0224, catopia.biz This full-service kitty resort and day spa caters to felines, who seem to think they deserve it more than most, with all sorts of perks and pamperings. Nail trims, flea preventive care, haircuts with styling, ear cleanings and healthcare are featured. (We always figured cats styled their own hair, what with all that licking.)

Honorable Mention

HOUSE OF REPTILES

About the winners FIRST PLACE: MATTHEW APONTE

Jax Beach resident Matthew Aponte rescued his beagle mix Chloe when she was just 5 weeks old. He describes it as something like love at first sight; Chloe went up to him and made it clear that he had to take her home. Chloe, now 4 years old, is extremely protective and very sweet. She’s also addicted to her tennis ball. In this picture, you see Chloe trying to catch her breath after a good round of fetch – while, of course, not letting that ball out of her sight. JUDGES’ NOTES: The photo is exquisitely composed, bright and colorful, and poignantly captures the existential joy of being a dog.

SECOND PLACE: JEFF DAVIS

Jeff Davis adopted Olive from a shelter in Topeka, Kansas. Olive never learned how to meow, but she did learn how to coo like a pigeon from watching them out the window all day. She spends her days channeling the spirit of Lady Gaga through her own brand of pigeon-singing – or, as pictured, working on her “Blue Steel” pose in the bathroom mirror. JUDGES’ NOTES: “Half-cat,” as this photo became known around the office, is also gorgeously composed, showcasing Olive’s striking features and (what we imagine to be) absolute contempt. Like all cats, Olive knows that she is superior to everyone around her.

THIRD PLACE: CASSIE PFENNING

Before Cassie Pfenning adopted Vali, the chocolate lab/Weinaraner mix was wandering in a Walmart parking lot, running among the cars. A friend bought Vali home, but her other dogs didn’t get along with him, so Pfenning jumped at the chance to take him in. Vali is “a big goofball,” Pfenning says. He’s a frisky pup, and Frisbee-crazy. Pfenning took this picture when Vali was sitting in the tub after a flea bath. He likes swimming, but he doesn’t like baths because he doesn’t like sitting still. Pfenning snapped Vali in a rare moment when he did. JUDGES’ NOTES: Look at his eyes. Look at them.

HONORABLE MENTION: ALLISON AGNELLO

Allison Agnello nursed Basil back to health after finding her in her Gainesville house after a rainy day. Basil never left. Basil acquired her name from her voracious appetite, which once led her to consume an entire basil plant. She will also eat frozen peas, spinach and olive oil – basically, anything. As such, she is occasionally in need of dental hygiene, and has her own toothbrush. Basil chews on it often. JUDGES’ NOTES: There is a cat (apparently) brushing its teeth. What else do you want?

PRIZES

Our first-place winner gets to choose from among the following prizes; after that, the runner-up gets a choice of what’s left, and what’s left over goes to our third-place photographer. • A prize basket with goodies, including a free annual visit and vaccines from the Clay County Humane Society, a $140 value. • A $50 gift card from Julington Creek Animal Hospital, good for vet visits as well as day care and overnight services. • Free grooming and a bag of homemade treats from Bark on Park Avenue in Riverside, a $50 value. We’d like to thank our contest sponsors for their generosity.

5501 Beach Blvd., Ste. 1, San Marco, 348-2050, thehouseofreptiles.com The knowledgeable staff here can help with all your reptilian and amphibious animal needs, from acquiring the critters themselves (including invertebrates and mammals, too) to supplies, habitats, live food, dry goods and more. Open daily.

JOLLY’S REEF SHACK

3610 Blanding Blvd., Westside, 772-1600, jollysreefshack.com Family-owned-and-operated for six years, this shop offers lizards, tarantulas, freshwater and saltwater fish, corals, decorations and custom stands, as well as a wide variety of South American and African cichlids. (Yeah, we had to Google it, too.)

MY CAPTIVATING CAVALIERS

7759 Plummer Rd., Northside, 716-6162, mycaptivatingcavaliers.com AKC-registered Cavalier King Charles Spaniel puppies, with first set of shots, Florida Health Certificates and a one-year health guarantee, are available. Dams and sires are heart and eye clear. All puppies are crate-trained, socialized and started on potty training.

OCEAN REEF

1537 Atlantic Blvd., Stes. 33, 37, 39 & 41, Neptune Beach, 246-0999 Owner Mike Brainard has expanded this Beaches landmark pet store — it’s now stretched over four storefronts, serving Northeast Florida and the beaches for more than 19 years (30 overall). Ocean Reef specializes in saltwater fish, freshwater fish and reptiles and reefs, corals, plants and all manner of aquatic supplies for tanks and aquariums. Birds and bird supplies are also offered.

Treat your dog to a vacation while you’re away!

PAWFECTION BAKERY

8467 Windypine Lane, Ortega, 626-1676, pawfectionbakery.com Innovative wheat-free, soy-free and corn-free dog and cat treats and cakes are made with fresh ingredients daily, right here in Jacksonville. There are scads of other stuff, too: bandanas, beds, chews, collars, leashes, costumes, clothing and accessories, plus people things, like mugs and magnets. (Is it just us, or do dogs and cats always look embarrassed wearing clothes?)

PETCO

11111 San Jose Blvd., Mandarin, 260-3225, petco.com 950 Marsh Landing Pkwy., Ste. 145, Jax Beach, 273-0964 11900 Atlantic Blvd., Intracoastal, 997-8441 1514 C.R. 220, Fleming Island, 215-7498 463713 S.R. 200, Yulee, 225-0014 430 CBL Dr., St. Augustine, 824-8520 These full-service pet stores offers dog training, grooming, vaccination clinics and adoption meet-and-greets as well as a complete selection of supplies for both domestic and exotic pets. Seminars on pet-care topics are held regularly; check with the Petco nearest you for details.

• BRAND NEW 10,000 sq. ft. facility • All-inclusive Luxury Boarding • Attendant on-site 24 hours a day • Grooming Services & Day Care • Recreational Yards & • Web Cams for Checking on Your Pooch

PETSMART

8801 Southside Blvd., Ste. 3, Southside, 519-8878, petsmart.com 10261 River Marsh Dr., Ste. 143, St. Johns Town Center, 997-1335 356 Monument Rd., Regency, 724-4600 1919 Wells Rd., Orange Park, 579-2362 9515 Crosshill Blvd., Ste. 113, Oakleaf, 777-8688 13141 City Station Dr., Northside, 696-0289 1779 U.S. 1 S., St. Augustine, 495-0785 This pet store chain offers supplies and services for all kinds of pets — dogs, cats, fish, birds, reptiles — including a variety of food, healthcare items, collars, crates, grooming items, training books and

Relaxing for your dog & convenient for you when you’re away! Call today to reserve a spot!

904.757.3295 • barkavenue-petresort.com 10427 ALTA DRIVE • JACKSONVILLE, FL JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 11


2014 Pet Lovers’ ISSUE pet clothing. PetSmart has chinchillas, gerbils, guinea pigs, hamsters, mice and rats, too. Services include boarding, grooming, training, vet services and Doggie Day Camp. Really.

PET SUPERMARKET

1020 Ponce de Leon Blvd. S., St. Augustine, 824-5876, petsupermarket.com 10485 San Jose Blvd., Mandarin, 886-9300 609 Beach Blvd., Jax Beach, 249-6884 835 Blanding Blvd., Orange Park, 276-4042 3760 University Blvd. W., Lakewood, 739-3310 4524 St. Johns Ave., Avondale, 384-2006 The chain store has a variety of items and brands, food, pest treatments, apparel, cages, tanks and in-store vaccination services for all kinds of pets. Pet care training for kids is offered on the website; we were intrigued by the Interactive Fish Training link, but couldn’t get the browser upgrade to work.

PET WORLD

10400 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 13, Mandarin, 262-4646, petworldpets.com This holistic dog and cat spa and supply store, in business for more than 25 years, also features a full grooming salon and puppies and kittens for sale. The products are natural and additivefree. Treats include cookies, cakes, biscuits and chews. The boutique stocks shampoos, treatments, candles and sprays. Leashes, collars, harnesses, bedding and crates are available.

MARLEY, WITH A DEER Human: Cheryl Snipes

LEO Human: Melissa Montoya

REDBONES DOG BAKERY & BOUTIQUE

809 Eighth St. S., Fernandina Beach, 321-0020, 800-693-1315, redbonesbakery.com The canine-centric bakery offers more than 30 varieties of homemade-style doggie treats, using only all-natural human-grade ingredients, as well as all-natural premium holistic organic pet foods and supplements. The boutique features collars, leashes, toys, harnesses, spa products and oral health products. Free dog washes and adoptions are also held. Open daily.

DAY CARE & BOARDING BARK AVENUE PET RESORT

10427 Alta Dr., Northside, 757-3295, barkavenue-petresort.com This place is more than just a kennel – Bark Avenue is an all-inclusive luxury pet-care and boarding facility to pamper your pals when you’re away, featuring all the amenities you’d want. Professional grooming, too.

BARK ON PARK PIGGY Human: Suzanne Mechelke

ALICE Human: Elise Hilgeman 12 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

1021 Park St., Riverside, 356-4530, thebarkboutique.com The upscale urban dog retreat and boutique offers everything canine, from products — food, collars, leashes, beds and blankets — and grooming to daycare, boarding and training.

FRANKIE Human: Lisa Bond


Now Offering I-131 Treatment For Hyperthyroid Cats Has your cat...

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904.674.7223 info@saintfrancisanimalhospital.org www.facebook.com/saintfrancisjax JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 13


14 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014


Pet Lovers’ Pet Lovers’ ISSUE 2014 Pet Lovers’ 2014 ISSUE 2014ISSUE POW POW AND MAX Human: Tracey Gratil

CAPTIVATING ACRES PET RESORT

7759 Plummer Rd., Northside, 716-6162, captivatingacres.com This family-owned, 14-acre facility features indoor and outdoor runs for the pet boarded while the owners are away. All pets are required to be up to date on shots. An initial interview is necessary to access the pet’s temperament to make sure it’s a good fit. Pick-up and drop-off are available for an additional fee. Reservations are recommended.

DOGTOWN USA

6988 U.S. 1, St. Augustine, 347-2363, dogtownresorts.com 11740 San Jose Blvd., Mandarin, 337-9840 This all-indoor, climate-controlled facility is dedicated to providing a safe, secure and friendly boarding, day-care and grooming facility for pets.

FRESH PRINTS PET LODGE & DAY RESORT

3327 Peach Dr., Southside, 642-9988, freshprintspetresort.com The family-owned kennel caters to pets, with professional grooming, boarding, an off-leash dog park, birthday parties and special events for your furry (or not so furry) friends. Accessories and day care for dogs are also featured.

JULINGTON CREEK ANIMAL WALK & HOSPITAL

12075 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 300 (resort), Mandarin, 338-9480, jcaw.com 12075 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 100 (hospital), 268-6731 The full-service pet resort offers lodging, day care, grooming and training. A nine-acre, off-leash dog park is also featured. The hospital features six veterinarians and offers pet wellness, internal medicine, radiography and emergency care.

PARK STREET PAWS

LILLIAN Human: Brittany Mon

2728 Park St., Riverside, 619-5946 The full-service grooming salon and retail shop, with 30 years’ experience, offers cage-free day care and boarding. Cats are welcome, too. Walk-ins accepted until 2 p.m.

LILLIAN Human: Brittany Mon

PET PARADISE

5140 University Blvd. W., Lakewood, 396-7529, petparadiseresort.com 14272 Pecan Park Rd., Northside, 741-0050 125 Ponce Harbor Dr., St. Augustine, 797-9770 The mission at Pet Paradise is to create a safe, clean and fun environment for all its four-legged guests. Perks include a doggie-treat-shaped pool and latenight potty breaks, pickup and drop-off services by appointment, as well as dog and cat grooming. The Pecan Park location is by the airport.

ZUCCA AND THE PRINCE Humans: Ryan Gunwitch-Black and Tulpa Black

PURRS ’N’ WOOFS

1650 Margaret St., Ste. 302, Riverside, 316-3955, purrsnwoofs.com Professional, affordable in-home pet-sitting and dog-walking service for Riverside, Avondale, Ortega and Murray Hill neighborhoods.

PET RESCUE & ADOPTION CATS ANGELS INC. SPCA

P.O. Box 16072, Fernandina Beach FL 32035, 321-2267, catsangels.com This nonprofit, begun in 2001, helps with Fernandina’s overpopulation of felines, using the Trap-Neuter-Return (TNR) Program. Volunteers keep the program going and donations of supplies and money to foster kittens and cats until they’re adopted are always welcome. They run a thrift store, too, at 709 S. Eighth St., Monday-Saturday.

CLAY COUNTY ANIMAL CONTROL

JAKE AND LUCY Human: Shannon Clancy

JAKE AND LUCY Human: Shannon Clancy

HENRY WADSWORTH Human: Sigrid Newbury

3984 S.R. 16 W., Green Cove Springs, 269-6342 Adoption center: 1809 Town Center Blvd., Fleming Island, 529-4733 Clay County, First Coast No More Homeless Pets and PetSmart Charities have teamed up to offer Spay Clay, a spay/neuter and rabies vaccination of all pets of low-income Clay County residents, for only $20. No required additional charges. Free weekly transports are also available. Volunteers are always needed. JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 15


2014 Pet Lovers’ ISSUE SYLVESTER Human: Eli Grimes

CLAY COUNTY HUMANE SOCIETY

2230 Filmore St., Orange Park, 276-7729, clayhumane.org The Clay County Humane Society operates a not-for-profit, low-cost spay and neuter clinic that provides all forms of affordable veterinary care, including behavioral counseling and disaster preparation. Fundraiser include Barkin’ Bingo, held at Señor Wings on Blanding Boulevard every Wednesday. The clinic is open Monday-Saturday.

FIRST COAST NO MORE HOMELESS PETS

6817 Norwood Ave., Northside, 425-0005, fcnmhp.org The mission of FCNMHP is to eliminate the killing of dogs and cats through free and low-cost spay/neuter programs. FCNMHP partners with city and county animal control departments, pet stores, vets and animal hospitals to help ensure homeless animals find good homes. Many events are held throughout Northeast Florida to raise funds for the animals’ care, including Mega Pet Adoption. FCNMHP, Jacksonville Animal Care & Protective Services and Jacksonville Humane Society offer more than 1,000 pets from 10 a.m.-6 p.m. July 18 at Jacksonville Fairgrounds, 510 Fairground Place, Downtown. The $20 fee includes spay/neuter, microchip, vaccines and city license.

FLAGLER HUMANE SOCIETY

1 Shelter Dr., Palm Coast, 386-445-1814, flaglerhumanesociety.org FHS takes in homeless animals, cares for them and finds them homes. FHS also offers a spay/neuter program, foster parent program and microchipping. Volunteers are welcome. Fundraisers and county licensing fees help fund the programs.

FRIENDS OF JACKSONVILLE ANIMALS

BABY Human: Terri Durden

KINGSLEY Human: Alex Senesi

2020 Forest St., Downtown, friendsofjaxanimals.com This nonprofit works directly with Animal Care & Protective Services, to benefit the lives of shelter animals by assisting with fundraising, medical care, adoption and advocate for animal welfare. Efforts include enriching shelter environment and reducing the euthanasia rate.

FRIENDS of ST. JOHNS COUNTY PET CENTER

130 N. Stratton Rd., St. Augustine, 209-6190 FOSJCPC is a nonprofit supporting the St. Johns County Pet Adoption & Holding Center.

JACKSONVILLE ANIMAL CARE & PROTECTIVE SERVICES

2020 Forest St., Riverside, 630-2489, jaxpets@coj.net Animal Care & Protective Services have hundreds of animals for adoption 10 a.m.-6 p.m. Tue.-Sat.

JACKSONVILLE HUMANE SOCIETY

8464 Beach Blvd., Southside, 725-8766, jaxhumane.org JHS offers adoptions for spayed/neutered, vaccinated and microchipped pets. Animals older than 3 are free. Camp Paw Prints, 8 a.m.-noon weekdays, June 9-13, 16-20, 23-27, July 7-11, 21-25 and July 28-Aug. 1, is for campers ages 7-13, teamed and assigned a dog to be adopted. Campers teach basic obedience, exercise and groom the dog. The cost is $150 per week session per child, which includes a T-shirt, goodie bag, snacks and drinks and all activities and materials.

LUCKY CAT ADOPTIONS

P.O. Box 8490, Fleming Island FL 32006, 888-545-4567, luckycatadoptions.org The volunteer nonprofit cat rescue group’s mission is to improve the welfare of stray and abandoned cats and kittens throughout the metropolitan area, through the rescue, rehabilitation and placement of homeless felines from animal shelters, found stray, abandoned, neglected and/or abused.

MAYPORT CATS INC.

mayportcats.com, mayportcats@yahoo.com This nonprofit organization tends to the feral and abandoned cats in Mayport Village, using the TNR program – Trap, Neuter and Release. The allvolunteer staff accepts donations of food, blankets, sheets and towels. A tax-deductible donation helps spay/neuter/vaccinate one local feral cat.

NASSAU COUNTY ANIMAL SERVICES

86078 License Rd., Fernandina, 491-7440, nassaucountyfl.com NCAS promotes and protects public safety 16 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | OCTOBER 2-8, 2013


2014 Pet Lovers’ ISSUE

YOUR PETS’ HOME AWAY FROM HOME

BRADY Human: Elizabeth Anderson

904-268-6731

SEA BASS Human: Jennifer Waide Thompson

JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 17


COME IN ON FOUR FEET, GET A FREE TREAT!

2014 Pet Lovers’ ISSUE

809 South 8th Street Amelia Island, FL 32034

(904) 321-0020 or (800) 693-1315 Visit Redbonesbakery.com

WALTER Human: Mark Braddock

CHIPPY Human: Alex Donaldson

$89 June 4 - Sept. 3, 2014.

18 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

$110

STORMY Human: Andee Litchfield


2014 Pet Lovers’ ISSUE and animal care through sheltering, adoption programs, education and animal law enforcement.

THE OLD DOG HOUSE

1650 Margaret St., Ste. 302, Riverside, 419-7387, theolddoghouse.org This rescue group for older and senior dogs is a nonprofit, 501c3 charity that always needs volunteers to take in these dogs.

PET RESCUE NORTH INC.

477-1000, petrescuenorth.com The nonprofit no-kill animal shelter has cats and dogs for adoption.

PIT SISTERS

kym@pitsisters.org, pitsisters.org This local pitbull rescue organization focuses on saving animals from shelters throughout Northeast Florida. Volunteers help with rehabilitation, care and feeding of pitbulls until they can be adopted.

SAFE ANIMAL SHELTER

2913 C.R. 220, Middleburg, 276-7233, safeanimalshelter.com The no-kill shelter provides temporary safe haven for abused, abandoned, lost and unwanted cats and dogs until they can be adopted in a permanent home. SAS advocates spay/neuter to control animal overpopulation. Volunteers and donations are always welcome.

WAGS & WHISKERS PET RESCUE

1967 Old Moultrie Rd., St. Augustine, 797-1913 (dog rescue), 797-6039 (cat rescue), wwpetrescue.org The nonprofit rehomes animals in St. Johns

County. The various ways to help include pet socialization, cleaning, fostering, and feeding animals, and volunteering at the monthly dog wash or weekly adoptions.

TRAINING & GROOMING A1A DOG TRAINING

1665 Old Moultrie Rd., St. Augustine, 377-0037, a1adogtraining.com A1A Dog Training offers private canine problemsolving classes, obedience and agility group classes, training for service and therapy dogs.

GREEN DOG SPA

11048 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 7, 683-5301, greendogspa.com The full-service grooming salon, which practices a natural, holistic approach to dog and cat care, offers haircuts, spa packages, facials, body scrubs, pawdicures, aromatherapy, teeth-cleaning, deshedding and special needs massages. The spa has accessories, treats, supplements and clothing.

K-9 HAIRSTYLES

1204 Third St. N., Jax Beach, 270-8494, k9hairstyles.com Professional dog groomers specialize in grooming young, geriatric and difficult pets. Owner Michaelle Boyajian, who is a member of the National Dog Groomers Association of America with more than 25 years’ experience, offers earcleaning, hand-massaged bath, brush-out, gentle no-heat-fan coat dry, breed-specific haircuts, nail-trimming and filing, anal gland expression,

SOPHIE Human: Dee Gordon JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 19


2014 Pet Lovers’ ISSUE dematting and tear stain removal.

K-9 TRAINING CENTER

1763 East Rd., Southside, 379-1727, k-9trainingcenter.org The center offers training in obedience and conformation for puppies and adult dogs. A grooming salon is onsite, as well as stylist and trainer schools. Training for K-9 dogs and service dogs is also available. Free dog training for military vets with PTSD is offered; call for details.

PRECIOUS PET

12041 Beach Blvd., Ste. 1, Southside, 683-0187, preciouspetgroomingsalon.com Professional certified groomer Laura Assuncao offers grooming for all breeds of cats and dogs, featuring show styles, scissoring, shed-outs and shampooing, as well as teeth-cleaning, gland treatments and nail polishing. Tony Assuncao offers K9 dog training and obedience training. Precious Pet boards pets, long-term or day care, and helps rescued dogs get adopted.

SOCIETY PET SPA

1665 Old Moultrie Rd., St. Augustine, 829-2737, staughumane.org The dog grooming salon offers everything from basic baths to breed-specific haircuts, pawdicures and facials. Proceeds benefit St. Augustine Humane Society’s charity programs.

VETERINARY & EMERGENCY SERVICES ALICE AND IVAN Human: Carolyn Dehlinger

THE ANIMAL CLINIC OF MANDARIN

9776 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 5, Mandarin, 262-2953, drkaisersanimalclinicofmandarin.com The full-service veterinary clinic, located in the heart of Mandarin, offers a variety of services, including boarding, X-rays, EKG, dentistry, skin care and geriatric care to surgeries. Heartworm, and flea and tick prevention, advice and medications are also featured.

ANIMAL HOSPITAL OF HODGES

13947 Beach Blvd., Ste. 105, Intracoastal, 992-1888, hodgesanimalhospital.com The veterinary hospital offers preventive care, boarding and emergency care. The knowledgeable team also makes house calls. Open MondaySaturday; on call on Sunday.

ATLANTIC EAST ANIMAL CLINIC

519 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 246-8300, atlanticeastanimalclinic.com Dr. John Green and Dr. Erin Bendick, at this full-service veterinary hospital for more than 35 years, offer surgical and therapeutic laser services to ensure your pet has comprehensive veterinary care. Wellness services, vaccination programs and dental work are also available.

SEBASTIAN Humans: Jeffrey Billman and Adriana Ruiz-Billman

(Yes, this is the editor’s dog. He insisted.)

BARTRAM PARK ANIMAL HOSPITAL

13760 Old St. Augustine Rd., Julington Creek, 402-8222, bartramparkanimals.com This full-service animal care facility offers well-pet plans, preventive care, vaccines and dental work, as well as medical or surgical intervention. It’s also a credentialed center for stem cell therapy (vet-stem).

BEST VETS

2107 Mango Place, San Marco, 900-0220, bestvetsjax.com Best Veterinary Emergency Treatment & Specialties is committed to providing quality emergency and specialty care for animals at reasonable rates. Open daily.

EMERGENCY & CRITICAL CARE PET HOSPITAL

NEKO Human: Kelli McLaughllin 20 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

RIDGE Human: Dana Graves

14185 Beach Blvd., Ste. 7, Southside, 223-8000, 911-vet.com The pet hospital provides emergency and critical care for the Northeast Florida pet community. They’re open after-hours at nights, weekends and on all major holidays.


• On-site live in • Web cams available • Bone-shaped pool • Indoor/outdoor climatecontrolled suites • Outdoor play area • On-call vet services

COMPLIMENTARY DAY OF DAY CAMP

OFFER VALID WITH THIS COUPON AND FOR NEW CUSTOMERS ONLY. NOT VALID ON HOLIDAYS, WITH OTHER OFFERS OR PRIOR PURCHASES. ONE COUPON PER CUSTOMER.

JACKSONVILLE AIRPORT

14272 Pecan Park Road - 904.741.0050

UNIVERSITY BLVD

5140 University Blvd. - 904.396.7529

PET PARADISE RESORT PAR ADISE FOR PETS

ST. AUGUSTINE

125 Ponce Harbor Drive - 904.797.9770 To make a reservation or view additional locations, visit www.PetParadiseResort.com or call 1.877.PETS.PLAY.

PET PARADISE WANTS TO “MAKE A SPLASH” THIS SUMMER BY DONATING $10,000 TO A CHARITY OF YOUR CHOICE.

Visit www.timetomakeasplash.com to find out how you can help. JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 21

© 2014


2014 Pet Lovers’ ISSUE STOLI Human: Alexia Lewis

COLE Human: Jessica Pomeroyj

KIP Human: Candice McDowell

TOBIAS Human: Joshua Brangenberg

PUMPKIN Human: Katie Santilli 22 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014


2014 Pet Lovers’ ISSUE

Kids’ ADVERTISING S Day

This is a copyr

HERSCHEL ANIMAL CLINIC

4030 Herschel St., Avondale, 389-0364, herschelanimalclinic.com Serving Northeast Florida since 1960, this veterinary clinic provides basic wellness and highquality preventive veterinary medicine, surgery and services at affordable rates.

HIRSCH ANIMAL HOSPITAL

220 Valley Circle, Ste. 101, Ponte Vedra, 285-0023, hirschanimalhospital.com Cary Hirsch, DVM, and Robin Chambers, DVM, have been providing services, using state-ofthe-art equipment, for more than 11 years. The small-animal clinic services include skin allergy testing, Western and Eastern medical and surgical care, spay/neuter, vaccines, acupuncture, internal medicine, dental care, nutrition counseling (holistic and non-holistic diet plans), ophthalmology and eye, ear, nose and throat care, as well as boarding and grooming.

OCEANVIEW VETERINARY HOSPITAL

1210 Third St. N., Jax Beach, 246-3600, oceanviewvet.com This full-service veterinary medical facility, using advanced treatment protocols, offers bathing, boarding, endoscopy, microchipping, surgery, vaccinations, dental, nutrition counseling, parasite prevention and control, and wellness exams. Oceanview sees dogs, cats, ferrets, birds, reptiles, rabbits and small mammals and exotic pets.

PET DOCTORS OF AMERICA

14471 Beach Blvd., Ste. 42, Intracoastal, 223-5700, petdoctorsofamerica.com 1103 Third St. S., Jax Beach, 853-6223 Pet Doctors of America is a professional veterinary medical center that provides animal healthcare, focusing on patient care and customer service, as well as full-service boarding and grooming services. Open daily.

ST. AUGUSTINE VETERINARY EMERGENCY CARE

2090 U.S. 1 S., St. Augustine, 797-5770, staugveter.com The mission of this medical facility is to provide emergency animal care in a caring environment. The professional staff is committed to the wellbeing of every pet.

ST. FRANCIS ANIMAL HOSPITAL

2107 Mango Place, San Marco, 674-7223, saintfrancisanimalhospital.org St. Francis Animal Hospital is a nonprofit full-service animal hospital whose mission is to provide quality, affordable healthcare to owned pets. Open daily until 11 p.m., St. Francis’ services include emergency care, digital x-ray, surgeries and dental care. St. Francis utilizes the area’s only hyperbaric oxygen therapy chamber, which, in combination with traditional therapies, has been shown to reduce healing time for wounds, snake bites, toxicities, spinal cord swelling and postsurgery to promote healing.

SOUTHSIDE ANIMAL CLINIC

100 Arlington Rd. S., Arlington, 328-1814, southsideanimalclinic.com The clinic helps pet owners searching for remedies to common health problems, like allergies, obesity, dietary and dental issues. Services include spay/ neuter, vaccinations and pet surgery, performed by skilled veterinarians.

DOG PARKS & PET ACTIVITIES DADDY DOGGIE DAY YAPPY HOUR

Celebrate Father’s Day with your pup from 2-6 p.m. on June 8 at The Jacksonville Landing, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown. A daddy/doggie look-alike contest (really!), a pet expo, free giveaways, prizes, live music by George Aspinall Band and drink specials are featured at this free event for dogs, their parents and dog lovers. The Landing holds Yappy Hour three times in the fall and three times in the spring. Each event features its own theme, contests and games, giveaways, pet expo, live music. jacksonvillelanding.com, facebook.com/yappyhourjax

DOG WOOD PARK

7407 Salisbury Rd., Southside, 296-3636, jaxdogs.com This 42-acre off-leash park has two swimming ponds — one for big dogs, one for dogs less than 25 pounds, hiking trails, play equipment, a shady area, 25 fenced acres and a dog shower for muddy paws. All male dogs 8 months and older must be neutered to enter the park; all dogs must be current on rabies vaccines. For fees and more details, hit the website.

PROMISE OF BENEFIT

This fundraiser, featuring a champagne reception, seated dinner, runway fashion show with rescued pets, a silent auction and live music, is held 6-9 p.m. July 29 at Alhambra Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, 641-1212, $85 (proceeds benefit First Coast No More Homeless Pets), fcnmhp.org.

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Saturday, June 7th

10am–4pm 715 Riverside Avenue

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SUPPORT

Fun activities for Kids!

PAWPARAZZI GALA

292 S.R. 312, St. Augustine, 386-965-7066, paintingwithatwist.com/staugustine 268 Solana Rd., Ponte Vedra, 687-4307 1525 San Marco Blvd., Jacksonville, 399-8399 This is different – the pet owner paints a portrait of their pet in a class or at a party. Bring your own refreshments and have fun while professional art instructors guide even the worst artists to render a reasonable facsimile of the beloved Fido or Fluffy. A Myasthenia Gravis Kids Foundation fundraiser is held 6-8 p.m. June 12 at St. Augustine location.

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AT THE VERY LEASH PET CARE SERVICES OF JAX

757 Camp Johnson Rd., Orange Park, 469-6647, attheveryleashjax.com The facility offers pet-sitting, dog-walking and poop-scooping services.

CANDLELIGHT SOUTH RESTAURANT

1 Anastasia Blvd., St. Augustine, 819-0588, This casual spot offers outdoor seating, where leashed dogs are welcome. Open for lunch and dinner daily. Happy hour, free Wi-Fi and a full bar are featured.

CREATURES GREAT & SMALL PET SERVICES

703-8581, jaxpetsitter.com This local pet-sitting service also offers dog walking, house checks, dog running and overnight visits. The service area includes Intracoastal West, Southside, San Marco, Downtown and Fort Caroline. Call for details, fees and more info.

GUARDIAN AD LITEM

214 N. Hogan St., Ste. 6004, Downtown, 255-8440, guardianadlitem.org Canine guardians ad litem, trained by Pet Therapy Inc., provide therapeutic comfort, social interaction and engagement for abused children. Volunteer with your pet to help local kids.

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O’BROTHERS IRISH PUB

1521 Margaret St., Riverside, 854-9300, obrothersirishpub.com O’Brothers Irish Pub welcomes pets to their large outdoor patio, when accompanied by a human. Free unlimited water served in a private water bowl, plus possible access to their human’s “doggie” bag, based on the pet owner’s mood.

PAW PRINTS PET CREMATORY

5570 Florida Mining Blvd. S., Ste. 610, Southside, 383-7387, pawprintspetcrematory.com The locally owned pet crematory is committed to providing professional and caring services at an affordable and reasonable cost for Northeast Florida’s pet community.

PET PARENTS

zazzle.com/petparents Customize shirts, mugs, calendars, key chains and novelty items with your pet’s picture are offered.

JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 23


SCAN THIS PAGE WITH LAYAR APP TO VIEW THIS WEEK’S PICKS

Our Picks Reasons to leave the house this week

FOLK ROCK GOSSAMER FRONTIER

If you’re aiming to swap lead with a The Quick and the Dead-era Gene Hackman-type at high noon, any song off Gossamer Frontier’s nine-track rambler Anywhere from Everywhere will set the tone nicely. If you’re not, it’s still a great listen. Johnny Dealy coaxes innovative, moody riffs out of his Telecaster; they meander like tumbleweed, starting from elemental notes and building into climaxes. Vocalist Shannon Vaughn croons over that foundation with loose, Robert Plant-style swagger, singing about typical neo-Western subject matter (defunct relationships, old habits, missed opportunities) in a way that makes this material stand out. 8 p.m. June 9 at Burro Bar, Downtown, $5.

GOOD DEEDS JACKSONVILLE FOODFIGHT

Northeast Florida restaurateurs step up for the city’s friendly food-related competition – sadly, not an actual foodfight – to raise funds for the Nourishment Network, which seeks to eradicate food insecurity locally. According to Foodfight organizers, one in six adults and one in four children in this area face going to bed hungry every night. The event, now in its 24th year, raised about $80,000 last year; it’s raised more than $1 million since 1989. 6:30-9 p.m. June 5 at Touchdown Club East, EverBank Field, Downtown, $60 in advance, $70 at the door, jacksonvillefoodfight.org.

KINDRED SPIRITS ANDREW JACKSON JIHAD

Folk punks Andrew Jackson Jihad started as a duo 10 years ago in the hot, dry air of Phoenix. All of their hard work, tears and sweat paid off, and they built a cult following that responded by funding a new van on Kickstarter, helping make this tour possible. They’ve also gone full-band for this one, but are still anchored by singer-songwriter Sean Bonnette’s honest, personal, attachment-creating lyrics. Says keyboardist Preston Bryant, “I think that Arizona and Florida are kind of kindred spirits, because most of the time when our states are in the media, it’s for something really bad.” 8 p.m. June 5 at Jack Rabbits, San Marco, $12.

SAND! 21ST ANNUAL BEACH BASH

It’s a fun, family-oriented outdoors event. (Parents, read: Get your kids tuckered out so you can finally enjoy some peace and quiet.) After a wide variety of activities, including sandcastle and sculpture contests, scavenger hunts and geo-caching events, you just might get time to grab a glass of chardonnay at the end of the day and catch an episode of Game of Thrones without wondering if adoption is still an option. 9 a.m.-4 p.m. June 7 at Anastasia State Park, St. Augustine, $2-$8, floridastateparks.org.

DONOVAN HANGOVER U.S. SOCCER SENDOFF

U.S. national team coach Jürgen Klinsmann (left) isn’t soccer fans’ most beloved person these days, not after he cut the best U.S. player ever, Landon Donovan, who scored a hat trick the last time the team played here. While cutting Donovan shook the U.S. more than anything Congress did this year, the cacophonous crowd at EverBank Field for this U.S.-Nigeria match – the last friendly before the Americans fly off to the World Cup’s Group of Death in Brazil – will be busy cheering on the players anyway, with perhaps only a smattering of boos for Klinsmann. 6 p.m. June 7 at EverBank Field, Downtown, $30-$350.

24 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

CAFFEINATED MOVIE-MAKING 48-HOUR FILM PROJECT KICK OFF

Filmmakers take on the challenge of creating a film in 48 hours from scratch. Don’t panic. Just caffeinate. Through some combination of creativity, nervous breakdowns, hard work, stimulants and skill, moviemakers compete to produce the best short film they can. Each team is randomly assigned a character, a prop, a line of dialogue and a genre. Films are screened at Sun-Ray Cinema in 5 Points (June 10-12), then those judged the best screen July 12 at The Florida Theatre. The winner of this year’s event, the eighth edition, goes up against winning films from 48-Hour competitions around the world. Kickoff is 6 p.m. June 6 at The Jacksonville Landing, Downtown, $175 late registration, 48hourfilm.com/en/Jacksonville.


JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 25


MUSIC

KEEP ON KEEPIN’ ON Deep South rock royalty Drive-By Truckers are back with a new studio album and a legendary live show

Photo: David McClister

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UPCOMING COMEDY

COMEDY NEXT WEEK:

NIKKI GLASER

.com 26 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

to cut it, and then use the first or second take. o band has elevated the once-second-class I can listen to English Oceans and hear a couple Southern rock genre to as critically and mistakes I made where the entirety of the track commercially respected heights as has was more important than fixing that mistake. Drive-By Truckers. Lead Truckers Patterson Now I just have to learn to make that mistake Hood and Mike Cooley have become every night.” American songwriting icons by successfully The rest of the Truckers have learned melding the aw-shucks attitude of The Allman to roll with those mistakes as well. Several Brothers, the hard-driving snarl of Lynyrd high-profile band members have departed on Skynyrd, the mythical style of T Bone Burnett and the backwoods strut of Bruce Springsteen’s what have been rumored to be acrimonious terms: Isbell in 2007, Shonna Tucker in 2011, forgotten Alabama cousin. Along the way, John Neff in 2012. But each time, the band has they’ve sold hundreds of thousands of records, remained strictly on message. (“We just ran helped to launch the careers of former into Jason in London and it was like seeing a Truckers like Jason Isbell and cultivated a brother,” Morgan says. “A lot of love there.”) diehard fanbase. That’s a testament to the longtime brand What’s most impressive, though, is the fact management of Jenn Bryant, who, along with that this ragtag band of Muscle Shoals and visual artist Wes Freed and producer David Athens-area natives has triumphed in spite Barbe, are often credited as unofficial members of the obstacles: numerous personnel shifts, of the band. “The band without them?” hard-partying early years, the weight of several Morgan says. “I don’t think it would work.” dense, double-disc concept albums. Yet even Critics and fans might disagree, as might most of those are now certified classics, starting also legendary soul musicians Bettye LaVette with 2001’s breakthrough Southern Rock and Booker T. Jones, both of whom tapped Opera, which fictionalized the rise and fall of the Truckers to back them up on celebrated Jacksonville native sons Lynyrd Skynyrd. comeback albums in 2007 and Even as band members have 2009, respectively. Yet even remained vigilant road dogs, DRIVE-BY TRUCKERS elite gigs like those haven’t touring upward of 200 days with WATER LIARS kept the band from relying on a year, each Truckers record 8 p.m. June 6, the road as its main source of made since 2001 has matched Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, revenue. “Touring has always or surpassed the success of its $30, 209-0399, been the way for us,” Morgan predecessor. All six after 2004’s pvconcerthall.com says. “That’s the only money The Dirty South have broken we really see, so we’re always into Billboard’s Top 100; the out there working. But we love being out there latest, this year’s English Oceans, hit No. 16. meeting people and seeing all our old friends, Much of this new record’s success has been too. The band’s in a great place.” attributed to the fact that Hood and Cooley Digging into Drive-By Truckers’ 12-album split songwriting duties equally for the first discography (or reveling in one of its marathon time in a decade, resulting in a balanced listen live celebrations) yields far deeper discoveries, that hits all the Truckers’ high spots: chugging however. The band’s hard-charging two-decade blue-collar balladry, muscular classic rock riffs existence serves as a crucial link from the Deep and Southern-fried grooves that swagger with South’s celebrated past — Patterson Hood’s swampy authenticity. father, David, founded the historic Muscle “It was fun watching those two work Shoals Sound Studio in 1969 — to its vibrant together,” says drummer Brad Morgan. “Past present and promising future. records have featured so many different “The younger generation coming out of songwriters that things get lost in the process. This time, it was nice just having the two of them Upper Alabama grew up knowing the history of Muscle Shoals and what made the area concentrate on the songs. I know they’ve never so popular,” Morgan says. “That died out in had a better time before — we all did, in fact.” the ’80s and ’90s, but these younger cats like Morgan, who’s the third-longest-serving Alabama Shakes and St. Paul & the Broken Trucker after Hood and Cooley (he joined Bones really get it. Usually that style comes in 1999), admits that even such a laser-sharp from England and has a shit-ton of money songwriting focus didn’t affect the band’s behind it trying to make it sound good. But off-the-cuff recording process — which itself these guys are recording in little bitty studios mirrors their spontaneous live show. like we did, to bring that style back. And it’s “We don’t use a set list,” he says. “Patterson coming out amazing.” and Cooley just fly and feel out the crowd. So I look at the records as blueprints for how shows Nick McGregor are going to be. We listen to a demo once, start mail@folioweekly.com


MUSIC

MUSIC TO DANCE AND KILL BY Meet the guy who freaked out Marilyn Manson

B

door of musicians and dancers known as the efore he became the infamous shock-rock Bomb Gang Girlz. Their sound combines giant Marilyn Manson, Brian Warner horror movie clips, throbbing industrial beats, was an aspiring journalist writing for a disco baselines, funk, electronic, New Wave, South Florida music and culture mag. He was and whatever else they feel like throwing someone to watch out for — quiet, but with into the mix, with lyrics that are often dark an anger and hostility under the surface. He and sexual, but done with tongue firmly in had an interest in dark and aggressive music, cheek, which offsets the satanic and occultist and with his pick of whom to interview, sought out industrial artists like Trent Reznor imagery. Their unique style landed them a cameo appearance in the 1994 cult classic of Nine Inch Nails, who later produced The Crow, followed by a spot on the Marilyn Manson’s first album, and Groovie soundtrack of 1995’s love-to-hate notoriously Mann of My Life with the Thrill Kill Kult. bad camp-classic Showgirls. Warner’s transformation into the persona of Marilyn Manson was no doubt inspired Though they helped to popularize the by the musicians he covered, but his initial industrial genre, other acts soon dominated reaction to meeting the Thrill Kill Kult the field, and Thrill Kill Kult’s somewhat frontman was, according mainstream success in the to a later documentary early-to-mid-’90s would on Warner, more horror prove to be the height MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT of their career. They’ve than admiration. He with INFERNAL DOLL FACTORY was weirded out by the continued to put out great and ULTR 7 p.m. June 10 at Underbelly, records despite the lack of encounter, saying he Downtown, $12-$25 had never met anyone so attention, and five years bizarre or satanic. after their last release, Knowing what the band this year issued Warner was to become, it’s hard to imagine Spooky Tricks, a synth-heavy industrial disco that anyone could scare him, but Frank record that would do well on a dance floor — Nardiello, better known by his stage name if you wanted to kill somebody while dancing. Groovie Mann, is known to be an off The tour to coincide with the album character. He bonded with his soon-to-be release makes its stop in Jacksonville at bandmate Marston Daley (aka Buzz McCoy) Underbelly on June 10. Expect a vaudevilleover a shared love of exploitation films style cabaret show, with half-naked go-go and tabloid tales of sex and Satan. The duo dancers in cages, chicks on roller skates and originally set out to make a trashy B-movie, large stage props. The supporting cast is à la John Waters, with the title My Life with always high energy, but some fans have been the Thrill Kill Kult, taken from a British known to complain about Groovie’s stage newspaper headline. Though the project was presence. Sometimes he’s totally on, getting scrapped due to lack of funds, the music they the crowd involved, and sometimes it feels recorded for it caught the attention of the like he’s phoning it in. Regardless, it’s sure to legendary Wax Trax! Records, which released be a spectacle, if nothing else. it as a three-song EP. Janet Harper Since then, the band has had a revolving mail@folioweekly.com JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 27


A&E // MUSIC

SURF CAMP

All skill levels Ages 6 and up Certified Instructors CPR Trained 24 Student Max Professional Staff June 9-13 June 16-20 June 23-27 July 14-18 July 21-25 (All Girls) July 28-August 1 August 4-8

28 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

CONCERTS THIS WEEK

THE ALMOST HEROES, MASTER RADICAL 8 p.m. June 4 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, free, 353-4686. ANDREW JACKSON JIHAD, CHEAP GIRLS, DOGBRETH 8 p.m. June 5 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $12, 398-7496. SUZI TRASH, ELECTRIC WATER, THE SUPER SUPER FUNKY FUNK, GROSS EVOLUTION 8 p.m. June 5 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, $5, 353-4686. WEEZER 7:30 p.m. June 6 at St. Augustine Amphitheatre, 1340 A1A S., $49.50-$75, 209-0367. DRIVE-BY TRUCKERS, WATER LIARS 8 p.m. June 6 at Ponte Vedra Concert Hall, 1050 A1A N., $30, 209-0399. GRIM ZIPPER TOUR: SCUM, DMIZE, STATIK OF RX 7 p.m. June 6 at Underbelly, 113 E. Bay St., Downtown, $10-$20, 353-6067. CHRISTOPHER CROSS with the JACKSONVILLE SYMPHONY ORCHESTRA 8:15 p.m. June 6 at Metropolitan Park, 1410 Gator Bowl Blvd., Downtown, $84, 354-5547. KINGS OF HOLLYWOOD TOUR: APPETITE FOR DESTRUCTION (Guns ’N’ Roses tribute), RED, WHITE & CRUE (Mötley Crüe tribute), POISON’D 8 p.m. June 6 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $10, 246-2473. KRACKER JAXX 8:30 p.m. on June 6 at Fionn MacCool’s, Jacksonville Landing, Ste. 176, Downtown, 374-1247. ARCHNEMESIS 8 p.m. June 6 at 1904 Music Hall, 19 N. Ocean St., Downtown, $10. SONS OF HIPPIES, BASK, APPALACHIAN DEATH TRAP 8 p.m. June 6 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, $5, 353-4686. JOSH HOWELL & FRIENDS 8 p.m. June 6 at Murray Hill Theatre, 932 Edgewood Ave. S., $5, 388-3179. RICKOLUS, LAKE DISNEY, RUFFIANS 8 p.m. June 6 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $5, 398-7496. RETRO KATS 8 p.m. June 6 at The Jacksonville Landing, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, free, 353-1188. SONGWRITER’S CIRCLE ANNIVERSARY: LARRY MANGUM, MIKE SHACKELFORD, JAMIE DEFRATES 7:30 p.m. June 7 at Mudville Music Room, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., St. Nicholas, 352-7008. BOSTON 7:30 p.m. June 7 at St. Augustine Amphitheatre, 1340 A1A S., $39.50-$125, 209-0367. P.S. CANCER SUCKS BENEFIT: PARKRIDGE, ROSEDALE, WINTER WAVE, ATTIS ON THE PINE, A CALL FOR KYLIE, ENVIEW 6 p.m. June 7 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $10, 398-7496. DALTON CYR, MEREDITH RAE, “MRS. KATE” CARPENTER 10:30 a.m. June 7 at Riverside Arts Market, 715 Riverside Ave., free, 389-2449. PRIME TREES, ORANGE JUICE, MATT HENDERSON 8 p.m. June 7 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $8, 246-2473. SOMETHING DISTANT 8 p.m. June 7 at The Jacksonville Landing, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, free, 353-1188. DENDERA BLOODBATH, BOGGSIE BRIGADE, KING PLYWOOD 8 p.m. June 7 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, $5, 353-4686. HOT DAZE & COOL KNIGHTS: MAS APPEAL, ROBIN BANKZ, DJ SNOW, THE HATERFREES 9 p.m. June 7 at Rain Dogs, 1045 Park St., Avondale, free, 379-4969. ANIMALS AS LEADERS, CONQUERING DYSTOPIA, CHON 6 p.m. June 8 at Murray Hill Theatre, 932 Edgewood Ave. S., $18, 388-3179. GOSSAMER FRONTIER 8 p.m. June 9 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, $5, 353-4686. PURPLE FEST: G-MAYN-FROST, ASKMEIFICARE, XXII, LEGIT, INFAMOUS 6 p.m. June 10 at Freebird Live, 200 N. First St., Jax Beach, $10, 246-2473. OUTEREDGE, THE PAPER JETS, URSA MINOR 8 p.m. June 10 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, $8, 398-7496. MY LIFE WITH THE THRILL KILL KULT, DJ TOXIC RAINBOW, INFERNAL DOLL FACTORY 7 p.m. June 10 at Underbelly, 113 E. Bay St., Downtown, $12-$25, 353-6067. ARC & STONES 8 p.m. June 10 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, $5, 353-4686. TREEHOUSE!, SUN DRIED VIBES, WHO RESCUED WHO, DANKA 8 p.m. June 11 at Jack Rabbits, 1528 Hendricks Ave., San

Marco, $8, 398-7496. BEARTOE, PALEFACE 9 p.m. June 11 at Underbelly, 113 E. Bay St., Downtown, 353-6067. THE EVERYMEN, THE VIVID, THE DULL BLADES 8 p.m. June 11 at Burro Bar, 100 E. Adams St., Downtown, $5, 353-4686.

UPCOMING CONCERTS

JONATHON SCALES FOURCHESTRA June 12, Underbelly ACOUSTIC ALCHEMY June 12, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall MOVE LIVE June 12, The Florida Theatre SLAUGHTER DAUGHTERS, SNAKE BLOOD REMEDY June 12, Burro Bar WAR OF AGES, BEYOND THE SHORE, NEVERENDER June 12, Murray Hill Theatre FOXY SHAZAM, LARRY & HIS FLASK June 13, Freebird Live DOUBLE SHOT, NATALIE NICOLE GREEN June 13, The Jacksonville Landing OTTMAR LIEBERT, LUNA NEGRA June 13, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall MIDNITE, 100% ST. CROIX ROOTS June 13, Jack Rabbits THE CORBITT BROTHERS, LEFTY WILLIAMS BAND, APPLEBUTTER EXPRESS June 13, Underbelly LASTWATCH, URSA MINOR, CLC June 13, Murray Hill Theatre FLORIDA COUNTRY SUPERFEST: LUKE BRYAN, JASON ALDEAN, ERIC CHURCH, MIRANDA LAMBERT, FLORIDA GEORGIA LINE, LITTLE BIG TOWN, BIG & RICH, EASTON CORBIN, COLT FORD, JOE NICHOLS June 14 & 15, EverBank Field SEAWALK MUSIC FEST: WOODY & THE PECKERS, SIDEREAL, ON GUARD, IVEY WEST BAND, JACKSONVEGAS, HERD OF WATTS, THE CORBITT BROTHERS, S.P.O.R.E., BE EASY June 14, SeaWalk Pavilion BLACK TAXI June 14, Underbelly AMB, PRAY, RAZORZ EDGE June 14, Aqua SHAUN PEACE BAND June 14, Jack Rabbits ROD MacDONALD June 14, Mudville Music Room COUNTING CROWS, TOAD THE WET SPROCKET June 14, St. Augustine Amphitheatre JORDAN-MORGAN LANSDOWNE, TROPIC OF CANCER, MONICA DA SILVA, CHAD ALGER June 14, Riverside Arts Market GRAYSON GIBSON June 14, Freebird Live THE GOOTCH June 15, The Jacksonville Landing BANE, CODE ORANGE KIDS, GIVE, RHYTHM OF FEAR June 15, Underbelly WHISKEY DIABLO June 15, Burro Bar THE ROUGH & TUMBLE June 17, Burro Bar PLASTIC PLANETS June 17, Jack Rabbits BIG SMO June 17, Mavericks BEACH DAY June 17, Underbelly COMMON KINGS, SAMMY J, THE JIMMY WEEKS PROJECT June 18, Jack Rabbits TERRAVITA, J. RABBIT, COMBUSTIBLE June 18, Freebird Live GYPSY STAR, REBECCA ZAPEN June 19, Mudville Music Room GOO GOO DOLLS, DAUGHTRY, PLAIN WHITE T’s June 19, St. Augustine Amphitheatre ZOSO (Ultimate Led Zeppelin Experience) June 19, Mavericks HUMMING HOUSE June 19, Jack Rabbits ANDY GRAMMER, JENNI REID June 19, Freebird Live IN DYING ARMS, MY TICKET HOME June 19, Aqua GERI X, KEVIN LEE NEWBERRY June 19, Burro Bar EARPHUNK, GREENHOUSE LOUNGE June 19, 1904 Music Hall KID SLIM, ZERO CALORIES, CONFESSION KILLS June 20, Jack Rabbits VACATION CLUB June 20, Underbelly OKOA REFUGE BENEFIT: GREY PALUSZYNSKI, BE EASY BAND June 20, Murray Hill Theatre SONS NOT BEGGARS June 20, Freebird Live LOVE MONKEY June 20, The Jacksonville Landing PROFESSOR WHISKEY June 21, Underbelly HATERFREE SOUNDCLASH 2 June 21, Rain Dogs MERCYGIRL, WHOSOEVER SOUTH June 21, Murray Hill Theatre ANDY KING’S SUMMER SOLSTICE SOIREE June 21, Mudville Music Room WORLD’S FAIR, TWO 9, DENVER June 21, Jack Rabbits DIXIE RODEO, SIDETRACK, MIKE KING, PAM AFFRONTI June 21, Riverside Arts Market VACATION CLUB June 21, Shanghai Nobby’s FOLIO WEEKLY’S FESTIVAL OF BEER: BE EASY, SPLIT TONE June 22, Riverside Arts Market PAUL McCARTNEY June 22, Veterans Memorial Arena THEY CAGE ANIMALS, LAST CHANCE FOR SARAH, DIRTY AUTOMATIC June 22, Jack Rabbits BEN’S MEMORIAL BENEFIT/HOPE FOUNDATION: MR. AL PETE, DIALECTABLE, MJ BAKER, MAS APPEAL, DILLON, FF JB, CHEECH, WILL FRAZIER, JEREMY BAKER June 22, Freebird Live CRANFORD HOLLOW June 25, Jack Rabbits SUMMER HORNS: DAVE KOZ, MINDI ABAIR, GERALD ALBRIGHT, RICHARD ELLIOT June 26, The Florida Theatre JIM CARRICK, MAJA GIATANA June 26, Mudville Music Room


A&E // MUSIC

REBELUTION, IRATION, THE GREEN, STICK FIGURE, DJ MACKLE June 27, St. Augustine Amphitheatre SHOT DOWN IN FLAMES (AC/DC tribute) June 27, Freebird Live FLAGSHIP ROMANCE CD RELEASE CONCERT June 27, Mudville Music Room SEVEN HANDLE CIRCUS June 27, Jack Rabbits MR. NATURAL June 27, The Jacksonville Landing HOT DAMN June 27, Underbelly DAVID DONDERO June 28, Shanghai Nobby’s SOSOS June 28, Jack Rabbits THE WHOLETONES, THE WILDER SONS June 28, Freebird Live BLUE MUSE, CLARAN SONTAG, TOM KAY June 28, Riverside Arts Market RADIO 80 June 28, The Jacksonville Landing THE VIOLENT 5, THE WOODGRAINS June 29, Jack Rabbits DAVID DONDERO, CHRISTINA WAGNER June 29, Rain Dogs THE COATHANGERS June 30, Underbelly I AM THE WITNESS, SECRET KEEPER, AMONGST THE FORGOTTEN, I AM KING, AS ALICE SLEEPS, OUR WALKING DECEPTION July 1, Murray Hill Theatre CHRIS HENRY July 3, Mudville Music Room SALTWATER GRASS, BONNIE BLUE July 3, Freebird Live FLAGSHIP ROMANCE, 77D’S July 4, Riverside Arts Market THE PURE ZEPPELIN EXPERIENCE July 4, Freebird Live CANARY IN THE COALMINE, THIS FRONTIER NEEDS HEROES, RICKOLUS, THE LITTLE BOOKS, FOUR FAMILIES, AL POINDEXTER & RIVER RISE July 5, Riverside Arts Market GUANTANAMO BAYWATCH, WET NURSE July 5, Underbelly SHINOBI NINJA, VIKTR July 5, Jack Rabbits SUPERVILLAINS July 5, Freebird Live BACKTRACK, HARM’S WAY, EXPIRE, TURNSTILE, SUBURBAN SCUM, DOWNPRESSER, IRON MIND July 6, Underbelly ZAK WATERS July 7, Jack Rabbits AARON LEWIS July 7, Mavericks LIL BOOSIE, WEBBIE July 12, Osborn Convention Center LEGIT, G MAYN FROST, ASKMEIFICARE, ALCATRAZ, PINKYKILLA, SYLENT VYLENTZ July 12, Freebird Live KALIYL FAREWELL SHOW: KALIYL, SUMERLIN, I ANTHEM July 12, Murray Hill Theatre DAVE MATTHEWS BAND July 15, Veterans Memorial Arena RAY LAMONTAGNE, JENNY LEWIS, THE BELLE BRIGADE July 15, The Florida Theatre DJ CLAY, ZUG IZLAND, RAZORZ EDGE July 17, Aqua RITUAL UNION CD RELEASE PARTY July 18, Deep Search Records SIDEREAL, HOURS EASTLY, CLOUD 9, RESINATED July 18, Freebird Live THI’SL, BRINSON, SECKOND CHAYNCE July 19, Murray Hill Theatre LICENSE 2 LAUGH: LAVELL CRAWFORD, TIM MURRAY, SHERYL UNDERWOOD, LAVAR WALKER July 19, T-U Center GROUNDATION July 19, Freebird Live THE BLACK CADILLACS, THOMAS WYNN & THE BELIEVERS July 20, Underbelly ALL NEW ATMOSPHERE July 20, Jack Rabbits AMERICAN IDOL LIVE! July 20, St. Augustine Amphitheatre OPOSSUMHOLLER, POOR RICHARDS, THE SENSES, SNAKE BLOOD REMEDY July 24, Jack Rabbits JOHN LEGEND July 25, St. Augustine Amphitheatre CULTURAL PROFETICA July 25, Freebird Live YING YANG TWINS July 25, Jack Rabbits EMMYLOU HARRIS July 26, T-U Center SARA BAREILLES July 26, St. Augustine Amphitheatre FALL OUT BOY, NEW POLITICS July 27, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE SOULSHINE TOUR: MICHAEL FRANTI & SPEARHEAD, SOJA, BRETT DENNEN, TREVOR HALL July 30, St. Augustine Amphitheatre GAVIN DEGRAW, MATT NATHANSON July 31, St. Augustine Amphitheatre QUINCY MUMFORD July 31, Jack Rabbits DIRTY HEADS, PEPPER, AER Aug. 2, St. Augustine Amphitheatre JAKIEM JOYNER Aug. 2, Ritz Theatre MAXWELL Aug. 3, T-U Center CRANFORD HOLLOW Aug. 7, Jack Rabbits ELLIS PAUL, DONNY BRAZILE Aug. 8, Original Café Eleven ULTIMATE ELVIS BASH Aug. 9, The Florida Theatre CROSBY, STILLS & NASH Aug. 10, St. Augustine Amphitheatre BAM MARGERA Aug. 12, Underbelly ROCK ’N’ BLUES FEST: JOHNNY WINTER BAND, EDGAR WINTER BAND, VANILLA FUDGE, PETER RIVERA (Rare Earth), KIM SIMMONDS (Savoy Brown) Aug. 14, The Florida Theatre PANIC! AT THE DISCO, WALK THE MOON, YOUNGBLOOD HAWKE Aug. 16, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE OFFSPRING, BAD RELIGION, PENNYWISE, FEAR Aug. 19, St. Augustine Amphitheatre THE FRESH BEAT BAND Aug. 22, St. Augustine Amphitheatre CASSADEE POPE Aug. 23, Mavericks at the Landing BOB WEIR, RATDOG, CHRIS ROBINSON BROTHERHOOD Aug. 24, St. Augustine Amphitheatre JEFF LORBER FUSION Sept. 6, Ritz Theatre THREE DOORS DOWN ACOUSTIC Sept. 7, Florida Theatre

ZZ TOP, JEFF BECK Sept. 7, St. Augustine Amphitheatre FORTUNATE YOUTH, THE STEPPAS, ASHES OF BABYLON, EASE UP Sept. 12, Freebird Live CONNECTION FESTIVAL: KERMIT RUFFINS & THE BBQ SWINGERS, LESS THAN JAKE, SURFER BLOOD, WHOLE WHEAT BREAD, TREME BRASS BAND, ORQUESTRA EL MACABEO, LA QUILOMBERA, THIS FRONTIER NEEDS HEROES, JACKIE STRANGER, WEEKEND ATLAS, NORTHE, EGO KILLER, JAH ELECT & THE I QUALITY BAND, UNIVERSAL GREEN, ORANGE AIR, ALEXIS RHODE, RYVLS, PROFESSOR KILMURE, RUFFIANS, THE GOOTCH, ASKMEIFICARE, DIRTY AUTOMATIC, WOVEN IN, GARRETT ON ACOUSTIC, TOM BENNETT BAND, MONDO MIKE & THE PO BOYS, ARTILECT, OSCAR MIKE, KANA KIEHM, PARKER URBAN BAND, KNOCK FOR SIX, NEVER ENDING STRUGGLE Sept. 12-14, Downtown Jacksonville 1964: THE TRIBUTE (Beatles tribute) Sept. 13, Florida Theatre SHERYL CROW Sept. 14, The Florida Theatre THE PRETTY RECKLESS, ADELITA’S WAY Sept. 18, Freebird Live KYLE KINANE Sept. 24, Jack Rabbits EUGE GROOVE Oct. 4, Ritz Theatre THE VIBRATORS, POWERBALL Oct. 12, Jack Rabbits MOTLEY CRUE, ALICE COOPER Oct. 19, Veterans Memorial Arena CROWDER, ALL SONS & DAUGHTERS, CAPITAL KINGS Oct. 19, Christ’s Church, Greenland LOS LONELY BOYS Oct. 21, The Florida Theatre ANDY McKEE Oct. 23, Ponte Vedra Concert Hall MIKE WATT & IL SOGNO DEL MARINAIO Oct. 23, Jack Rabbits ANJELAH JOHNSON Oct. 24, The Florida Theatre MAYSA Nov. 1, Ritz Theatre SUSAN BOYLE Nov. 6, T-U Center’s Moran Theater CASTING CROWNS Nov. 6, Veterans Memorial Arena CELTIC THUNDER Nov. 15, The Florida Theatre A PETER WHITE CHRISTMAS: PETER WHITE, RICK BRAUN, MINDI ABAIR Dec. 16, The Florida Theatre JOE BONAMASSA Dec. 17, The Florida Theatre ARLO GUTHRIE ALICE’S RESTAURANT MASSACREE Jan. 20, The Florida Theatre KATHLEEN MADIGAN Jan. 22, The Florida Theatre GET THE LED OUT March 25, The Florida Theatre

CLUBS AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH

DAVID’S RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, 802 Ash St., 310-6049 John Springer every Tue.-Wed. Aaron Bing at 6 p.m. every Fri. & Sat. DOG STAR TAVERN, 10 N. Second St., 277-8010 Working Class Stiff at 9:30 p.m. every Tue. PALACE SALOON, 117 Centre St., 491-3332 Buck Smith every Tue. THE SURF, 3199 S. Fletcher Ave., 491-8999 Brent Byrd at 6 p.m. on May 29. Brett Foster at 6 p.m. on June 2. DJ Roc every Wed. Honey Badgers every Sat.

ARLINGTON, REGENCY

MVP’S SPORTS GRILLE, 12777 Atlantic Blvd., 221-1090 Live music 9 p.m. every Fri. & Sat.

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

CASBAH CAFE, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966 Goliath Flores at 9 p.m. every Wed. Live jazz every Sun. Live music every Mon. ECLIPSE, 4219 St. Johns Ave., 387-3582 DJ Keith every Tue. DJ Free every Fri. DJ SuZi-Rok every Mon. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 3611 St. Johns Ave., 388-0200 Grandpa’s Cough Medicine at 9:30 p.m. on June 5. DiCarlo Thompson at 1 p.m. on June 8. Live music every Sat. MOJO NO. 4, 3572 St. Johns Ave., 381-6670 Live music every Fri. & Sat.

BEACHES

(All venues in Jax Beach unless otherwise noted)

200 FIRST STREET, Courtyard, Neptune Beach, 249-2922 Live music on June 6 & 7 BILLY’S BOATHOUSE, 2321 Beach Blvd., 241-9771 Kurt Lanham at 5:30 p.m. on June 5. Live music every Thur.-Sun.

JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 29


A&E // MUSIC

THE KNIFE

E

ver since Robert Plant uttered the words, “I watch your honeydrip, I can’t keep away,” any use of the word “honey” coupled with a vessel or delivery device — at least in a rock-’n’-roll song — has immediately evoked a certain female body part. Honeydripper, honey pot, honey trap — all undeniably euphemistic if utterly sexist. I’m positive that notion was the furthest thing from the minds of the members of Jacksonville’s Honey Chamber when they named their band and eponymous third album, but I can’t help but make the leap. I’ll try to put it aside, for now, but the fact that that band creates a post-millennial version of ambient ’60s pop doesn’t help matters. Still, I’ll do my best. Album opener “Parasite Lost” would’ve fit right in during the early days of the Fillmore West, with a psychedelic light show and go-go dancers in paisley mini-skirts flanking the stage. (Keep mind on task. Keep mind on task.) It sets the tone for the album perfectly, as the band rarely veers from its formula — which is a good one, to be sure. The second tune, “Grudges & Revisions,” could have used some revisions, namely the dropped snare beat in the ninth measure. (Yes, I counted.) Maybe they were trying to maintain a live, garage-y feel, but goodfreaking-God, that single misplaced beat had me backtracking several times to check myself. The Amboy Dukes-style vocal arrangement makes up for it — kinda. And the mistake did take my head off honey, at least for the moment. “Maria” follows, another hip-shaker and possibly the coolest tune on the record, though “Baby It’s a Raw Deal” is also a contender.

Very psyched-out, fuzz-toney pop, and no dropped snare beats getting in the way. “Wasp Honey” is pretty cool, but skip “Salad Days.” It’s a throwaway, too modern in this context, and pales in comparison to the others. “At Sea with You” brings it back, with washy, trippy, ’verbed-out harmonicas and hard tremolo guitars supporting a cheesy love song about honey … I mean, getting lost on the big blue with a lover. Bookending the collection is “Fool’s Parasite,” though in the song, they sing about “fool’s paradise.” The whole parasite thing has killed any romantic (or otherwise amorous) interpretations of the band’s name for me. Which might be a good thing. Still, in spite of its few missteps — maybe even because of them — this is a great record. The band released the CD in 2012 — we’re a little late to the party — but they’re pushing it now because the vinyl was just recently released. But in any event, it’s out, so pick it up … you know, if you’re into psychedelic pop and that delicious, golden, pollen-derived bee product. Honey Chamber is available at Deep Search Records in Riverside on vinyl and CD. It’s also available on vinyl at any Honey Chamber show and via digital download at honeychamber.bandcamp.com.

BRASS ANCHOR PUB, 2292 Mayport Rd., Ste. 35, Atlantic Beach, 249-0301 Dialtone Music, Joe Oliff at 9 p.m. on June 7 CANTINA MAYA, 1021 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 247-3227 Live music on June 6 CASA MARINA HOTEL, 691 First St. N., 270-0025 Charlie Walker at 2 p.m. on June 8 CULHANE’S IRISH PUB, 967 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 249-9595 Irish music at 6:30 p.m. every Sun. FLYING IGUANA, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680 Bread & Butter at 10 p.m. on June 6. Red Beard & Stinky E at 10 p.m. every Thur. Darren Corlew at 1:30 p.m. every Sun. FLY’S TIE IRISH PUB, 177 E. Sailfish Dr., Atlantic Beach, 246-4293 Wes Cobb every Thur. Charlie Walker every Mon. FREEBIRD LIVE, 200 N. First St., 246-2473 Kings of Hollywood Tour: Appetite for Destruction (Guns ’N’ Roses tribute band), Red, White & Crüe (Mötley Crüe tribute band) and Poison’d (Poison tribute band) at 8 p.m. on June 6. Prime Trees, Orange Juice, Matt Henderson at 8 p.m. on June 7. Purple Fest: G-Mayn-Frost, Askmeificare, XXII, Legit, Infamous at 6 p.m. on June 10. Foxy Shazam, Larry & His Flask June 13 ISLAND GIRL CIGAR BAR, 108 First St., Neptune Beach, 372-0943 Live music every Fri. & Sat. JAXON SOCIAL, 1161 Beach Blvd., 595-5660 The Crushed Velvet at 9 p.m. on June 7. Live music every Sat. LANDSHARK CAFE, 1728 Third St. N., 246-6024 Open mic every Wed. Matt Still every Thur. LYNCH’S IRISH PUB, 514 N. First St., 249-5181 Live music at 10 p.m. on June 6 & 7. Barrett Jockers every Wed. Split Tone every Thur. Dirty Pete every Sun. Be Easy every Mon. Ryan Campbell every Tue. MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1018 N. Third St., 246-1500 Three on June 4. Sway Ja Vue on June 5. Cam Jam on June 6. Ryan Crary on June 11 MEZZA RESTAURANT & BAR, 110 First St., Neptune Beach, 249-5573 Neil Dixon 6-8 p.m. every Tue. Gypsies Ginger 6-9 p.m. every Wed. Mike Shackelford & Steve Shanholtzer 6-8 p.m. every Thur. MOJO KITCHEN, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636 Live music every Fri.

NIPPERS BEACH GRILLE, 2309 Beach Blvd., 247-3300 Live music every Wed.-Sun. NORTH BEACH BISTRO, 725 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 372-4105 Acoustic Jukebox at 7 p.m. on June 5. Larry & the Backtracks 51 at 7:30 p.m. on June 6. Sidetrack at 7:30 p.m. on June 7 RAGTIME TAVERN, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877 Billy Bowers at 7 p.m. on June 11 THE SHIM SHAM ROOM, 333 First St. N., 372-0781 Live music every Mon. & Thur. DJ Nick Fresh every Fri. WIPEOUTS GRILL, 1589 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 247-4508 Ralph E. & the Jammers at 7:30 p.m. on June 5. Billy Bowers at 9:30 p.m. on June 6. Crazy Daysies at 7:30 p.m. on June 12

DOWNTOWN

1904 MUSIC HALL, 19 Ocean St. N. Ema & the Old Kings at 9 p.m. on June 4. ArchNemesis at 8 p.m. on June 6. Live music every Thur.-Sat. & Mon. BURRO BAR, 100 E. Adams St., 353-4686 The Almost Heroes, Master Radical at 8 p.m. on June 4. Suzi Trash, Electric Water, The Super Super Funky Funk, Gross Evolution at 8 p.m. on June 5. Sons of Hippies, Bask, Appalachian Death Trap at 8 p.m. on June 6. Dendera, Bloodbath, Boggsie Brigade, King Plywood at 8 p.m. on June 7. Gossamer Frontier at 8 p.m. June 9. Arc & Stones at 8 p.m. on June 10. The Everymen, The Vivid, The Dull Blades at 8 p.m. on June 11. Slaughter Daughters on June 12. Live music every Wed.-Sat. DIVE BAR, 331 E. Bay St., 359-9090 Mondo Mike & the Po Boys at 10 p.m. on June 6. Yankee Slickers at 10 p.m. on June 7 DOS GATOS, 123 E. Forsyth St., 354-0666 DJ NickFresh at 9 p.m. every Sat. FIONN MacCOOL’S, Jax Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1247 Spade McQuade at 6-9 p.m. on June 4. Braxton Adamson 5-8 p.m., Kracker Jaxx 8:30 p.m. on June 6. Spade McQuade 2-5 p.m., Mikey Clams Band 9 p.m. on June 7. Spade McQuade 6-9 p.m. on June 11 JACKSONVILLE LANDING, 2 Independent Dr., 353-1188 Holliday/Duffy Duo from 4-8 p.m., Retro Kats from 8 p.m.-1

HONEY ON THE BRAIN

30 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

John E. Citrone theknife@folioweekly.com

Honey Chamber’s eponymous third record is available on vinyl and digital download at honeychamber.bandcamp.com.

Your World Cup Soccer Headquarters


A&E // MUSIC a.m. on June 6. I Love Music Tour presents The I Love Music Foundation benefit concert: Issa, EverSay from 3-9:30 p.m., Something Distant from 10 p.m.-1:30 a.m. on June 7. George Aspinall Band at 8 p.m. on June 8. Live music every Thur.-Sat. MARK’S DOWNTOWN, 315 E. Bay St., 355-5099 DJ Roy Luis every Wed. DJ Vinn Thur. DJ 007 every Fri. Bay Street every Sat. MAVERICKS, Jax Landing, 2 Independent Dr., 356-1110 Friday Night Live, Andy Velo at 8 p.m. on June 6. Joe Buck, Big Tasty every Thur.-Sat. UNDERBELLY, 113 E. Bay St., 353-6067 Grim Zipper Tour: Scum, DMize, Statik of RX at 7 p.m. on June 6. My Life with the Thrill Kill Kult, DJ Toxic Rainbow, Infernal Doll Factory at 7 p.m. on June 10. Beartoe, Paleface at 9 p.m. on June 11. Jonathon Scales Fourchestra on June 12. Corbitt Brothers, Lefty Williams Band, Applebutter Express on June 13

music every Fri. & Sat. HARMONIOUS MONKS, 10550 Old St. Augustine Rd., 880-3040 Open mic: Synergy 8 p.m. every Wed. World’s Most Talented Waitstaff 9 p.m. every Fri. MONKEY’S UNCLE, 10503 San Jose Blvd., 260-1349 Live music at 10 p.m. every Sat.

ORANGE PARK, MIDDLEBURG

THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells, 272-5959 John Michael every Wed.-Sat. PREVATT’S SPORTS BAR, 2620 Blanding Blvd., 282-1564 DJ Tammy 9 p.m. every Wed. THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611 X-Hale at 10 p.m. on June 6 & 7. DJ Big Mike 10 p.m. every Thur. Live music every Fri. & Sat.

FLEMING ISLAND

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MELLOW MUSHROOM, 1800 Town Center Blvd., 541-1999 Live music every Fri. & Sat. MERCURY MOON, 2015 C.R. 220, 215-8999 Live music at 10 p.m. on June 6 & 7 WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198 Spanky at 9:30 p.m. on June 6 & 7. Kevin Wicker at 6 p.m. on June 7. Ace Winn at 4 p.m. on June 8. Open mic 9 p.m. every Thur. Deck music at 5 p.m. every Fri. & Sat., 4:30 p.m. Sun. DJ BG every Mon.

INTRACOASTAL WEST

CLIFF’S BAR & GRILL, 3033 Monument Rd., 645-5162 Second Shot at 9 p.m. on June 6. Those Guys on June 7. Live music every Wed., Fri. & Sat. Open mic every Tue. SALSA’S MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 13500 Beach Blvd., 992-8402 Live guitar music 6-9 p.m. every Tue. & Sat. YOUR PLACE, 13245 Atlantic Blvd., 221-9994 Clayton Bush at 9:30 p.m. June 4

MANDARIN, JULINGTON

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WEDNESDAY Dan Evans THURSDAY Kevin Banks & Alex Affronti FRIDAY & SATURDAY Rick Arcusa Band SUNDAY Pierce and Harmony Atlantic Blvd. at the Ocean Atlantic Beach • 241-7877

JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 31


PONTE VEDRA, PALM VALLEY

ISLAND GIRL CIGAR BAR, 820 A1A N., 834-2492 Clayton Bush at 9 p.m. on June 5 PUSSER’S GRILLE, 816 A1A N., 280-7766 Lance Neely at 6 p.m. on June 4. Aaron Koerner at 6 p.m. on June 5 & 11. Dopelimatic at 8 p.m. on June 6. Rebecca Day & Jenn Thompson at 7 p.m. on June 7. King Eddie & Pili Pili at 3 p.m. on June 8. Live music every Wed.-Sun. TABLE 1, 330 A1A N., Ste. 208, 280-5515 The Rubies at 6 p.m. on June 4. Gary Starling Jazz Band at 7:30 p.m. on June 5. Paxton & Mike at 7:30 p.m. on June 6. The Quimby Duo at 7:30 p.m. on June 7. Deron Baker at 6 p.m. on June 11. Live music every Wed.-Sat.

RIVERSIDE, WESTSIDE

KICKBACKS, 910 King St., 388-9551 Ray & Taylor 8:30 p.m. every Thur. Robby Shenk every Sun. MURRAY HILL THEATRE, 932 Edgewood Ave. S., 388-7807 Josh Howell & Friends at 8 p.m. on June 6. Animals as Leaders, Conquering Dystopia, Chon at 6 p.m. on June 8. War of Ages, Beyond the Shore, Me & the Trinity, Thought of Redemption, Neverender at 7 p.m. on June 12. Lastwatch, Ursa Minor, CLC, Red Black Main on June 13. Live music every Fri. & Sat. RAIN DOGS, 1045 Park St., 379-4969 Hot Daze & Cool Knights: Mas Appeal, Robin Bankz, DJ Snow, The Haterfrees at 9 p.m. on June 7 RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET, 715 Riverside Ave., 389-2449 Dalton Cyr, Meredith Rae, Mrs. Kate Carpenter starting at 10:30 a.m. on June 7

ST. AUGUSTINE

A1A ALE WORKS, 1 King St., 829-2977 Live music every Fri. & Sat. ANN O’MALLEY’S, 23 Orange St., 825-4040 Brent Byrd & the Suitcase Gypsies at 8:30 p.m. on June 6. CRS at 8:30 p.m. on June 7. Ricardo on June 9. Open mic with Smokin Joe every Tue. THE CELLAR UPSTAIRS, 157 King St., 826-1594 The

Committee at 7 p.m. on June 6. Billy Buchanan at 2 p.m., The Committee at 7 p.m. on June 7. Vinny Jacobs at 2 p.m. on June 8 THE CONCH HOUSE, 57 Comares Ave., 829-8646 De Lions of Jah from 3-7 p.m. on June 8 HARRY’S SEAFOOD, 46 Avenida Menendez, 824-7765 Billy Bowers 6 p.m. on June 4 MELLOW MUSHROOM, 410 Anastasia Blvd., 826-4040 Live music every Fri. MILL TOP TAVERN & LISTENING ROOM, 19-1/2 St. George St., 829-2329 Pic N Save at 9 p.m. on June 6. Wild Shiners at 9 p.m. on June 7. Colton McKenna at 1 p.m., Alex & Jim at 5 p.m. on June 8. Aaron Esposito 9 p.m. every Thur. David Strom at 9 p.m. every Mon. Donny Brazile 9 p.m. every Tue. SANGRIA’S, 35 Hypolita St., 827-1947 Live music at 8 p.m. every Thur. TRADEWINDS, 124 Charlotte St., 829-9336 Hootch at 9 p.m. June 6 & 7. Matanzas every Sun.-Thur. Elizabeth Roth at 1 p.m. every Sat.

ST. JOHNS TOWN CENTER

BLACKFINN GRILLE, 4840 Big Island Dr., 345-3466 Live music 5 p.m. every Wed., 9 p.m. every Thur.-Sat. SUITE, 4880 Big Island Dr., 493-9305 A-Rock on June 7. Live music 9 p.m. every Fri. & Sat.

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK

JACK RABBITS, 1528 Hendricks Ave., 398-7496 Andrew Jackson Jihad, Cheap Girls, Dogbreth at 8 p.m. on June 5. Rickolus, Lake Disney, Ruffians at 8 p.m. on June 6. P.S. Cancer Sucks Benefit: Parkridge, Rosedale, Winter Wave, Attis on the Pine, A Call for Kylie, Enview at 6 p.m. on June 7. The Paper Jets, Outeredge, Ursa Minor at 8 p.m. on June 10. Treehouse!, SunDried Vibes, Who Rescued Who, Danka at 8 p.m. on June 11. Midnite, 100% St. Croix Roots on June 13 MUDVILLE MUSIC ROOM, 3104 Atlantic Blvd., 352-7008 Darren Ronan, Joey Kerr, Louie LeClaire, Shane Myers at 7:30 p.m. on June 5. Songwriter’s Circle Anniversary: Larry Mangum, Mike Shackelford, Jamie Defrates at 7:30 p.m. on June 7

THE PARLOUR, 2000 San Marco Blvd., 396-4455 Alex Terrier Music at 9:30 p.m. on June 6

SOUTHSIDE, BAYMEADOWS

AQUA, 11000 Beach Blvd., 997-2063 Seseley Monat at 10 p.m. on June 6 ISLAND GIRL, 7860 Gate Pkwy., Ste. 115, 854-6060 Live music every Fri. & Sat. LATITUDE 30, 10370 Philips Hwy., 365-5555 VJ Didactic at 9 p.m. on June 5. Boogie Freaks at 9 p.m. on June 6. Blonde Ambition at 8:30 p.m. on June 7. Live music every Thur.-Sat. MELLOW MUSHROON, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., 997-1955 Ouija Brothers on June 7 MY PLACE BAR & GRILL, 9550 Baymeadows Rd., 737-5299 Aaron Sheeks on June 4. Dirty Pete on June 5. Fat Cactus on June 6. The Chuck Nash Band on June 7. Bryan Ripper, Clayton Bush on June 8. Fat Cactus every Mon. Chuck Nash every Tue. WILD WING CAFE, 4555 Southside Blvd., 998-9464 Chris Brinkley on June 4. Chilly Rhino on June 5. Kurt Lanham at 5 p.m., The Gootch at 9 p.m. on June 6. Fratello on June 7 WORLD OF BEER, 9700 Deer Lake Ct., Ste. 1, 551-5929 Flip Flop Boys at 8 p.m. on June 6. Who Rescued Who on June 13

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

HWY. 17 ROADHOUSE, 850532 U.S. 17, Yulee, 225-9211 Live music at 9 p.m. Fri. & Sat. THREE LAYERS COFFEEHOUSE, 1602 Walnut St., 355-9791 Open mic at 7 p.m. on June 5. Live music every Sat.

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DO THE RIGHT THING Steve Knight’s elegant, haunting film rides on a brilliant script and Tom Hardy’s stillness

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He’s downright passionate about concrete. his is the movie that’s just Tom Hardy He seems to understand it better than he driving in his car for 90 minutes, talking understands people. on his cell. We say things like “Oh, I’d Writer/director Steve Knight’s brilliant watch that guy read the phone book,” and this script — and this one is so much better is almost that. Except it’s absolutely riveting. than his previous film, the ambitious but Still, I’m seeing Locke getting called a tragicomically flawed Redemption — is played “thriller,” which is a little bit of a stretch. out like watching Locke try to pour emotional What Hardy’s Ivan Locke is driving toward concrete, as if he doesn’t understand that and what he’s talking to various people about people are not concrete and they will not on the phone are matters of some suspense, settle into the feelings you want them to settle and his motives end up being something that into if you get the mix of emotions just right. you could have wonderful heated discussions Maybe he has a slight tinge of Asperger’s. about for hours and hours afterward. But Maybe he’s just none of it is the usual not emotionally stuff of thrillers. What’s mature but trying going on here is that LOCKE to be; his phone Locke’s life is falling **** calls to the folks apart in the two-hour Rated R • Opens June 6 at Sun-Ray Cinema back home and drive from Birmingham the people ahead to London — the film of him in London reveal that he’s trying starts out in the interior of his car and never to do a “right thing” in a situation where leaves, almost unspooling in real time — there probably isn’t a single right thing to and he’s trying to manage his collapse in a be found, and yet if there were a wrongest practical way that can never work. thing he might do, a thing that would cause See, ’cause … well, I won’t tell you what maximum damage all around, to all aspects so urgently awaits him in London, but it’s no of his life both personal and spoiler to reveal that what he’s professional, he seems to have leaving behind in Birmingham found that. is “the biggest concrete pour Hardy is so still and so Europe has ever seen.” Locke calm through it all, and yet is a construction foreman — there’s a sense that Locke an expert for the megacorp might be throwing a sort of whose project he’s helping tantrum: Maybe he’s just build — and he’s required on broken an emotional last the scene for the big event the straw of his own? next morning. Except he’s in This is a marvelous film: simple, elegant, his car driving away from it. Some of his calls haunting. It may not be a thriller, but it’s are to his assistant, explaining what needs to certainly thrilling to see a filmmaker take such be done to get the job done right. Locke is very a daring risk and have it pay off so solidly. philosophical about his work: “You don’t trust God when it comes to concrete,” he explains MaryAnn Johanson with the patience of a priest talking to a child. mail@folioweekly.com

© 2013

“You don’t trust God when it comes to concrete.”

JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 33

1


A&E // MOVIES

NIGHTMARE OF TOMORROWLAND Director Doug Liman turns an alien invasion flick/Tom Cruise vehicle into so much more

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34 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

to do a limited sort of mental time travel. h, hooray. Director Doug Liman has As he lives this day over and over and over given us exactly the kind of sci-fi action drama we were hoping for from the indie again, his actions are like those of a game: He gets better at using his suit of powered filmmaker who sneaked up on the genre and battle armor, and he accumulates knowledge booted it into the 21st Century with 2002’s that helps him get a little farther each time. The Bourne Identity. Edge of Tomorrow is — He “plays” that battle multiple times, and unsurprisingly — smart, cleverly playing with every time he dies — which is every day — clichés it knows we’re familiar with and even he jumps back to that “saved” moment on goofing on its own storytelling. It is also — the airport’s tarmac. Soon he teams up with surprisingly — funny, an unanticipated treat another soldier, Rita Vrataski (Emily Blunt), considering it’s set during an alien invasion who knows what’s happening to Cage because which humanity seemingly cannot throw off. it happened to her. In fact, it’s the reason she’s Our hero, William Cage (Tom Cruise), is no hero. He’s a coward and a sniveling weasel. become the renowned “Angel of Verdun” — because she lived that battle over and over He wears the uniform of a U.S. Army major, until she won it for the human forces. but he’s no soldier; he’s a PR flack. We see Unlike movies actually based on video some of Cage’s smarm as he appears in bits of games, though, this one doesn’t feel like we’re a montage of TV news reports that opens the watching someone play a game we can never film, and he himself embodies a sort of spin. join. Even as the For Cage is charming day loops repeatedly and movie-star through the same handsome — the very EDGE OF TOMORROW events, there’s still image of inspiring ***G a sense that things soldierly spirit Rated PG-13 • Opens June 6 are moving forward when that is, in fact, — and, indeed, nothing but image. they are, in ways We witness that often become supremely suspenseful, Cage’s weaseling when he turns it on as when Cage has knowledge of things that General Brigham (Brendan Gleeson), head Rita can never know: She is not reliving this of the “United Defense Force” that’s about day. There’s much that is deeply poignant, as to launch a 21st-century version of D-Day Cage gets to know Rita in a way that she can with an invasion from England of alien-held never get to know him, and as we discover France. His weaseling ends badly — the scene she experienced something similar at Verdun; is a little marvel of witty writing in which the film doesn’t linger on this, just accepts it character drives plot (which can be said of as a tragic side effect of the war. There’s an the whole script) — and Cage ends up in the astonishing level of tension in the repeating middle of that invasion. events; that tension ratchets up in the finale in Like Cage, we get dumped right in the a wonderfully ingenious way. middle of this war. This alien invasion movie What Edge of Tomorrow ends up being isn’t an alien invasion movie. We see only about is this: perception. How we see snippets of the aliens’ arrival and initial ourselves and how the world sees us are two attacks, and we don’t ever know — and never very different things, and the difference is a learn — what they want with us or our planet. wider gulf for Cage and Rita. She is lauded as (Another witty little scene deals explicitly a hero for reasons no one will ever know, an with this question, and comes up with an adulation that, it is hinted, she doesn’t care excellent answer.) for. And that officer’s uniform commanding So what is Edge of Tomorrow, then? It such respect for Cage is ironic in a completely looks a lot like a video game movie, in some diametrical way at the end of the film than it aspects, because of what happens to Cage was at the start. Heroism, for them, is more a almost instantly on that invasion battlefield matter of “you have no damn idea what I’ve is: He gets killed by one of the slithering been through” than it has ever been for any aliens. And then he “wakes up” the previous heroes gone before. morning, just as he has arrived at the invasion’s forward base at Heathrow Airport, MaryAnn Johanson having accidentally absorbed the aliens’ ability mail@folioweekly.com


A&E // MOVIES

TALE OF A TREK Examining the human stories behind a centuries-old tradition

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Wayne, a Canadian widower who, along with ydia Smith’s Walking the Camino: Six his priest friend, is doing the pilgrimage in Ways to Santiago is a sweet little movie memory of his recently deceased wife. Wayne about a group of people varying in age and personality who take the 500-mile walk to comes to tears when explaining his reasons for taking the long walk, and seeing him Santiago de Compostela, with each having a having a good time as the film moves on is profound experience. genuinely heartwarming. A few years ago, director Emilio Estevez There’s Tómas, who provides the film with paid tribute to the pilgrimage with The Way, a drama starring his dad, Martin Sheen. I found some drama as his feet swell with blisters Smith’s film to be a better encapsulation of the and his ankles go wonky. In a truly kind gesture, one of his walking buddies gives experience. Before Estevez made his movie, Tómas his shoes when he leaves the Camino, his dad suggested they make a documentary demonstrating how friendships can sprout about the Camino instead. Father knew best, quickly during the experience. because the Estevez film was rather poor. From Denmark, Smith, who was there’s Misa, who has inspired to make the WALKING THE CAMINO: come to the Camino for movie after her own SIX WAYS TO SANTIAGO some solitude and soul expereinces hiking the ***@ searching, but winds up trek in 2008, gets a nice Not Rated • Screens 7:15 p.m. doing the trek with a international sampling for June 10 at Sun-Ray Cinema younger man. The film her subjects. The greatest suggests that the two charm of this film is watching how each of these participants reacts walkers get close, even though Misa observes and grows through the centuries-old tradition that they probably wouldn’t be getting together because of the age difference. Again, of crossing Spain on foot. the power of the Camino! There’s Annie, an American and the Finally, there’s Sam, a Brazilian woman most visibly emotional of the bunch, setting who takes to the Camino after the end of a her own pace because she has a bout with relationship and losing her job. Of all the tendonitis as she makes her way. We see participants, Sam appears to be in the worst Annie crying a couple of times, but she makes place emotionally and spiritually. By film’s it through her pain and has a spiritually end, she appears to be making some progress. fulfilling experience. All the stories are nicely tied together and Tatiana, a religiously devout woman balanced well. No doubt, Smith has much from France, has brought her brother Alexis appreciation for the Camino trek, and that along, as well as her intrepid 3-year-old son. vibe is apparent for the majority of the film’s Tatiana takes the experience seriously, while running time. Alexis treats it like a vacation. Of the travelers Walking the Camino: Six Ways to Santiago depicted in the movie, Tatiana seems the most left me wanting to take a nice long hike with agitated. Her son is a kick, and it’s impressive strangers. That’s a sensation I’ve never really that the little guy had the patience to walk the had, and this film does a nice job of showing Camino. Smith shows us no child tantrums, how enriching, both spiritually and physically, but I have to imagine the boy lost his cool at the Camino trek must be. one point or another. Perhaps a tantrum or two wound up on the cutting-room floor. Bob Grimm The film’s most touching moment is from mail@folioweekly.com

JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 35


A&E // MOVIES

MAGIC LANTERNS

OUTSIDE THE LAW A

mong American crime novelists of the past 50 years, two of the best were both named MacDonald (albeit with different capitalizations), and both were well-translated into film — Ross Macdonald and John D. MacDonald. I can’t recommend enough the original series of books by both writers. They are among the best in the genre. Between 1949 and 1976, Ross Macdonald wrote a series of 18 novels and three collections of short stories featuring Lew Archer, a private investigator whose most familiar milieu was the “means streets” of Southern California. Along with Raymond Chandler’s Philip Marlowe, Archer is the embodiment of the California gumshoe, soiled but honorable. From 1964-’84, John D. MacDonald wrote 21 novels about Travis McGee, a self-styled “salvage consultant” whose prowling grounds were mostly South Florida. Not an investigator as such, McGee was something of a tarnished knight (with a profit motive) trying to right wrongs outside the law. Each McGee novel was distinguished by a color in the title, as in Darker than Amber, written in 1966 and filmed in 1970. Sam Elliott played McGee in a 1983 TV movie based on The Empty Copper Sea, but it was the Australian actor Rod Taylor who scored big in Darker than Amber, currently available only on YouTube. Adhering closely to MacDonald’s novel, the film shows McGee and his financier buddy Meyer (Theodore Bikel) locking horns with a formidable sadist (William Smith) after rescuing one of his intended victims (Suzy Kendall). Fast-paced and violent, Darker than Amber concludes with one of the best fight scenes (between Taylor and Smith) in movies of the ’60s and ’70s, right up there with the tussle between Sean Connery and Robert Shaw in From Russia with Love. The Florida ambiance is also perfect, as is the filmmakers’ depiction of McGee’s famous houseboat, The Busted Flush. Lew Archer (last name changed to Harper for the films) has appeared in two good movies, each featuring Paul Newman as Ross Macdonald’s hero. Harper was a big hit for Newman in 1966, cementing his status as one of Hollywood’s most bankable stars. Based on The Moving Target (1949), the first of the Archer novels, the movie closely follows the book’s complicated plot of kidnapping, murder, drugs and illegal immigration. Featuring an all-star cast (Lauren Bacall, Robert Wagner, Shelley Winters, Janet Leigh), the movie is slow on action but big on characterization. Most of all, this is Newman’s show, with the accent on “wry” and “cool.” (It was rumored that the actor/producer had the character’s name changed to Harper because of the huge success of Hud and The Hustler, but this is just another Hollywood myth.) Newman returned to the role nine years later in The Drowning Pool, based on the second novel in the Lew Archer series. Apart from moving the setting to Louisiana from California, the plot is again faithful to its source, Harper embarking on a case involving blackmail, murder and dark family secrets. Newman, joined by real-life wife Joanne Woodward, is even better here, and so is the film, with a particularly good action sequence toward the end. Three fine movies featuring legendary characters from two great series of novels: The stories are definitely worth both a second read. Pat McLeod mail@folioweekly.com 36 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

FILM RATINGS **** TOM PETTY

***@

TOM BROKAW

**@@ TOM SELLECK

*@@@

TOM DeLAY

OTHER FILMS SUN-RAY CINEMA Godzilla and Belle are shown at Sun-Ray, 1028 Park St., 5 Points, 359-0049, sunraycinema.com. Locke, reviewed in this issue, screens June 6. The Lunchbox starts at 3:30 p.m. June 6, running for a week. Walking the Camino, reviewed in this issue, is screened 7:15 p.m. June 10. TV series Cosmos runs at 9 p.m., Mad Men at 10 p.m. every Sunday; check for updates. LATITUDE 30 MOVIES Nonstop, The Lego Movie and Divergent are screened at Latitude 30’s CineGrille Theater, 10370 Philips Hwy., Southside, 365-5555. WGHF IMAX THEATER Maleficent: An IMAX 3-D Experience, Island of Lemurs: Madagascar and D-Day Normandy screen at World Golf IMAX, St. Augustine, worldgolfimax.com.

NOW SHOWING THE AMAZING SPIDER-MAN 2 **@@ Rated PG-13 Complaints for this one range from an overstuffed cast of villains to allegedly cheap, cut-sceney FX to the unreality of casting a black actor as a guy who throws thunderbolts from his body. Maybe Marc Webb has committed a colossal blunder in rushing toward a Sinister Six movie and maybe he hasn’t; judge for yourself. — Steve Schneider BELLE ***@ Rated PG The historical drama blends a critical legal moment in England’s abolition of slavery with forbidden romance and Austenesque characters, like Lord Mansfield (Tom Wilkinson) and Lady Mansfield (Emily Watson) and Dido Elizabeth Belle (Gugu Mbatha-Raw), the mixed-race daughter of a slave and Royal Navy officer John Lindsay (Matthew Goode), and her sister-cousin Elizabeth “Bette” Murray (Sarah Gadon). When Belle’s mother dies, her father sends her to live with her great-uncle, Lord Mansfield, Lord Chief Justice of England, who paved the way to abolish slavery. — David Johnson BLENDED Rated PG-13 When she was in the Memento-“inspired” romcom 50 First Dates, Drew Barrymore played a woman whose lack of short-term memory kept her from remembering she’d already gone out with Adam Sandler. Life imitatates art: the real Drew seems to have suffered a similar cranial trauma, since she can’t remember she’s made three movies with the guy. In this one, they play single parents who have to quell their mutual animosity on a shared safari vaca. — S.S. CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE WINTER SOLDIER ***G Rated PG-13 Steve Rogers (Chris Evans), aka Captain America, hasn’t had time to cope with after-effects of one-way time travel, via cryonic sleep, from the 1940s to the 2010s, but he’s starting to face his disconnect. Costars Samuel L. Jackson, Scarlett Johansson and Stan Lee! — Marlene Dryden CHEF Rated R Director/writer/star Jon Favreau has made a tasty comedy-with-a-heart about Chef Carl Casper (Favreau) who gets the axe from the chichi restaurant where he works. To start over from scratch, he goes the route of many local food artisans: food truck! OK, no more bad puns. While making a go of the traveling dining car, Carl tries to keep his family intact, or at least get them on friendly terms. Co-starring Scarlett-Christher-again? Johansson, Bobby Cannavale, Dustin Hoffman, Robert Downey Jr., and the near-adorable Oliver Platt. — M.D. DIVERGENT Rated PG-13 Beatrice Prior (Shailene Woodley) is labeled a Divergent, a group of misfits considered so dangerous that their destruction is plotted. Costars Kate Winslet, Ashley Judd and Zoe Kravitz. — M.D. EDGE OF TOMORROW ***G Rated PG-13 • Opens June 6 Reviewed in this issue. THE FAULT IN OUR STARS Rated PG-13 • Opens June 6 John Green’s novel about young cancer patients in love yields a date movie/weeper that’ll one day sit on your shelf next to My Girl and Mask if it plays its cards right (and if you don’t slash your wrists with a Netflix

SICK IN LOVE: Hazel (Shailene Woodley) with her oxygen and Gus (Ansel Elgort) with his prosthetic leg aren’t typical teen lovebirds in The Fault in Our Stars. They met at a cancer support group; guess where this one goes? Photo: 20th Century Fox coupon first). When the book came out, the critical praise it got was interrupted only by a Daily Mail pan that consigned it to the “Sick-Lit” subgenre of juvie fiction (yes, that’s a thing); can’t wait to see what choice words the Tories have for this adaptation, because I’m all about the jargon. One detail to watch: In the book, our heroes bond over a viewing of V for Vendetta, and if that made it into the movie, it means somebody is finally going to see part of V for Vendetta! — S.S. GODZILLA ***G Rated PG-13 The new version updates the King of All Monsters beautifully, in tandem with the global zeitgeist. Instead of nukes, global warming is the bugaboo behind today’s ’Zilla. Dr. Ichiro Serizawa (Ken Watanabe) works with a secret research group studying Godzilla since the ’50s – those Pacific nuke “tests” were efforts to kill the damn thing. Costars Bryan Cranston, Aaron Taylor-Johnson, Juliette Binoche, Elizabeth Olsen and Sally Hawkins. — MaryAnn Johanson HORNET’S NEST Rated R Photojournalist Mike Boettcher and his son Carlos are on a mission to reconnect – in the Afghanistan war zone, documenting U.S. troop activity. Despite the powerful true story of survival against all odds, wouldn’t a nice weekend fly-fishing or building a go-kart have been a better choice? — M.D. LOCKE **** Rated R • Opens June 6 at Sun-Ray Cinema Reviewed in this issue. THE LOVE PUNCH ***@ Rated PG-13 Richard (Pierce Brosnan) just sold his company for a cool $10 mil, ready to retire: travel, golf, young women. Ex-wife Kate (Emma Thompson) hates his cheating. Then Richard learns the company was liquidated; everything, including his and Kate’s retirement, is gone. Uniting against a common enemy, the couple tracks down Vincent (Laurent Lafitte), the crooked businessman who screwed them over, to steal a big diamond to re-fund their retirement. — Dan Hudak THE LUNCHBOX Rated PG • Opens June 6 at Sun-Ray Cinema There’s a mixup in Mumbai. Young housewife Ila (Nimrat Kaur) puts a note in a lunchbox, which is erroneously delivered to Saajan (Irrfan Khan), a widower. Soon, notes are being exchanged between the two lonely people. The romcom is in Hindi and English. MALEFICENT Rated PG When Wicked let a nation of grade-school girls and middle-aged homosexuals reimagine The Wizard of Oz from the ostensible villain’s point of view, the Disney Company’s rodent ears shot up: “Hah! We’ve got a buttload of public-domain baddies,” they chortled. So we see the messy Sleeping Beauty deal played out according to its antagonist queen (Angelina Jolie) – the only character from the original you know. — S.S. MANAM Not Rated The comedy/drama, starring the late Nageswara Rao, Nagarjuna, Naga Chaitanya, Shriya Saran and Samantha,

touches on reincarnation and eternal love. In Telugu. MILLION DOLLAR ARM Rated PG In a perfect world, Jon Hamm would be on the set of Batman vs. Superman now, in red booties, practicing the line “I like pink very much, Lois.” Instead, we have to live in reality, where we get only a paltry seven goddamn episodes of Mad Men a year, and they’re interrupted by promos for Million Dollar Arm, a Disney family sports flick about a baseball agent who goes to Mumbai to scout potential pitching talent. Slumdog Rookie, anyone? Aasif Mandvi is in this, too, instead of starring in a Comedy Central series about an embattled Al-Jazeera correspondent. — S.S. A MILLIONS WAYS TO DIE IN THE WEST Rated R When you’re a fan of someone pilloried mercilessly by cognoscenti, you suffer the heartbreak of watching him prove every rotten thing they said. (See: Clay, Andrew Dice.) Hope that’s not true of Seth MacFarlane, the standard-bearer of comedy that’s too funny for people with advanced degrees to get. The promo for this has made it look exactly like the sort of frat-rape divertissement MacFarlane’s dimmest detractors expect. Please, God, let this just be boneheaded marketing drastically misrepresenting a modern-day inheritor to Support Your Local Sheriff, and not confirmation there really isn’t much daylight between Peter Griffin and Dane Cook after all. — S.S. NEIGHBORS **G@ Rated R New parents Mac (Seth Rogen) and Kelly (Rose Byrne) Radner have to put up with the Delta Psi fraternity buying the suburban house next door. They try to play nice with the party-hearty crew led by chapter president Teddy (Zac Efron), but escalating noise leads to a conflict. — Scott Renshaw ONLY LOVERS LEFT ALIVE **@@ Rated R Director-writer Jim Jarmusch’s vampire film captures the magic, melancholy and the blessing – and curse – of immortality. Adam (Tom Hiddleston) is secluded in a derelict Detroit mansion, composing music. — Cameron Meier THE OTHER WOMAN Rated PG-13 Nick Cassavetes directs Cameron Diaz as a woman who forges an unlikely alliance with her three-timing boyfriend’s wife and mistress. — S.S. THE RAILWAY MAN Rated R The war drama is based on a true story about Eric Lomax (Colin Firth), a British officer tortured in Japan during WWII. Years later, he had the rare opportunity to meet one of his Japanese tormentors. Should he forgive? Co-stars Stellan Skarsgård and Hiroyuki Sanada. — M.D. WALKING THE CAMINO: SIX WAYS TO SANTIAGO ***@ Not Rated • 7:15 p.m. June 10 at Sun-Ray Cinema Reviewed in this issue. X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST ***G Rated PG-13 Bryan Singer’s action-packed film costars Michael Fassbender and Nicholas Hoult.


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A&E // ARTS

Limelight Theatre of St. Augustine Presents

PERFORMANCE

Classic Musical by Lionel Bart 3-color (CMYK) Directed by Tom Fallon Musical Direction by Shelli Long

2-color (CMYK)

825-1164 | 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine

Limelight-Theatre.org

Church-State Watchdog Group Launching “Operation Inclusion,” a Multi-Pronged Plan to Protect the Rights of All Americans

“Operation Inclusion: There’s a Role for Each of Us!” (CMYK) in light of the U.S. SuThis plan 1-color is needed preme Court’s recent misguided ruling that allows prayer at government meetings. The plan is intended to protect the rights of all Americans and to educate legislators and citizens on the ruling and its implications.

____________________________

Monday, June 16, 2014 6:30 - 8:30 p.m. at the

Buckman Bridge Unitarian Church 8447 Manresa Ave., Jacksonville 32244

____________________________

presented by

Rabbi Merrill Shapiro

President, National Board of Trustees Americans United for Separation of Church and State

For more info visit: firstcoastfreethoughtsociety.org The FIRST COAST FREETHOUGHT SOCIETY, INC.

904-419-8826

P.O. Box 550591 Jacksonville, FL 32255 Meetings Free ● Open to the Public 38 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

SOCIAL SECURITY This comedy is staged through June 8 at Alhambra Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, $38-$55, 6411212, alhambrajax.com. THE HEIRESS Catherine is a shy young woman who falls in love with Morris, a charming man-about-town. Her father thinks he’s just after her fortune and forbids them to marry. 7:30 p.m. June 5, 6 and 7 at Fernandina Little Theatre, 1014 Beech St., Fernandina Beach, $16.50, 277-2202, ameliaflt.org. VENUS IN FUR A mysterious, funny, erotic drama about Thomas, a beleaguered playwright/director, desperate to find an actress for the role of Vanda, the female lead in his adaptation of his play-within-a-play. Staged at 8 p.m. June 6 and 7, 12-14, 20 and 21 and at 2 p.m. June 15 at Players by the Sea, 106 Sixth St. N., Jax Beach, $20-$23, 249-0289, playersbythesea.org. LES MISERABLES Fugitive Jean Valjean evades police while the French Revolution erupts in the classic French drama by Boublil and Schonberg, June 6-22 at Theatre Jacksonville, 2032 San Marco Blvd., $20-$25, 396-4425, theatrejax.com. OLIVER! The British musical adaption of Charles Dickens’ classic is presented at 7:30 p.m. June 6-July 6 on Limelight Theatre’s Matuza Main Stage, 11 Old Mission Ave., St. Augustine, $25, 825-1164, limelight-theatre.org. PIRATES OF PENZANCE When the hero of this comic opera was a boy, his father told his nurse to have him apprenticed as a pilot. She heard “pirate” – thus, the zany troubles begin. It’s staged at 8 p.m. June 6-7, 13-14, 20-21 and 27-28 for Sunday matinees at 3 p.m. June 8, 115, 22 and 29 at Orange Park Community Theatre, 2900 Moody Ave., $20, 276-2599, opct.org. SHREK THE MUSICAL A loveable ogre, a chatty donkey and a fiery princess set out on a fairy-tale adventure to save a swamp, 7:30 p.m. (weekend matinees) June 11-July 27 at Alhambra Theatre & Dining, 12000 Beach Blvd., Southside, $38-$55, 641-1212, alhambrajax.com. THE FOREIGNER Charlie is a depressed Englishman at a Southern fishing lodge in Georgia. He pretends he can’t speak English, so other lodgers speak freely in front of him. The play is staged at 8 p.m. June 12-28 at Amelia Community Theatre, 209 Cedar Street, Fernandina Beach, $10-$20, 261-6749, ameliacommunitytheatre.org. TICK TICK BOOM Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre presents the play about Jon, an aspiring composer New York City in 1990, worried he made the wrong career choice to be part of the performing arts in a charming, autobiographical story of Larson, who wrote the award-winning musical Rent.; it’s staged at 8 p.m. June 13, 14, 20 and 21 and at 2 p.m. June 15 and 22 at Adele Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, $15-$20, 249-7177, abettheatre.com.

COMEDY

RON FEINGOLD Funnyman Feingold performs at 8 p.m. June 5 and 7 and 9:30 p.m. June 6 at Latitude 30, 10370 Philips Highway, Southside, 365-5555, latthirty.com. D.L. HUGHLEY He’s on the radio on The D.L. Hughley Show and was a regular on the late-night talk show circuit. Hughley appears at 8 p.m. June 5-7; 10 p.m. June 6 and 7 at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, $20-$25, 2924242, comedyzone.com. DEAN NAPOLITANO The comedian appears at 8:04 p.m. on June 5 and 6 and 8:04 and 10:10 p.m. on June 7 at Comedy Club of Jacksonville, 11000 Beach Blvd., Southside, 6464277, $6-$25, jacksonvillecomedy.com. NIKKI GLASER She’s co-host of MTV’s Nikki and Sara Live and can be seen on Comedy Central Inside Amy skits; she appears here at 8 p.m. June 12, 13 and 14; 10 p.m. June 13 and 14 at The Comedy Zone, 3130 Hartley Rd., Mandarin, $20-$25, 292-4242, comedyzone.com. KURT GREEN Comedian Green performs at 8 p.m. June 13 and at 7 and 9:30 p.m. June 14 at Latitude 30, 10370 Philips Highway, Southside, 365-5555, latthirty.com. MAD COWFORD IMPROV Weekly improv shows based on audience suggestion are held 8:15 p.m. every Fri. and Sat. at Northstar Substation, 119 E. Bay St., Downtown, $5, 2332359, madcowford.com.

CALLS & WORKSHOPS

BROWN BAG LUNCH WITH BRYAN BOOKS Brooks discusses the presence of German U-boats on the First Coast during WWII, at noon on June 4 at Amelia Island Museum of History, 233 S. Third St., Fernandina Beach, free, gray@ ameliaamusem.org. IMPROVISATION FOR TEENS Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre holds an improvisation workshop for teens in grades 9-12 at 3 p.m. June 5 at Adele Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach,

249-7177, abettheatre.com. FROM GRAFFITI TO PUBLIC ART The panel discussion Freedom of Artistic Expression is led by John Phillips, attorney for Chip Southworth; Dave Engdahl, the chairperson for Art in Public Places; a Jacksonville Sheriff’s Office graffiti abatement officer and local artists, moderated by Deborah Reid, 6:30-8 p.m. June 5 at the Art Center Main Gallery, 31 W. Adams St., Downtown, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org. SUMMER BOOK SALE Friends of the Library book sale is held June 6 and 7 at St. Johns County Main Library, 1960 N. Ponce de Leon Blvd., St. Augustine. Books, CDs, DVDs and VHS tapes are available. 827-6945, sjcpls.org. JACKSONVILLE’S CHILDREN’S CHORUS AUDITIONS The Jacksonville Children’s Chorus and the Young Men’s Chorus of Jacksonville audition for kids in grades 1-12 for the 2014-’15 season, June 26. By appointment only, 353-1636, jaxchildrenschorus.org, youngmenschorusjax.org.

CLASSICAL & JAZZ

MUSIC BY THE SEA Rob Peck & Friends perform jazz; dinner available from Caribbean Sol; 6 p.m. food service, concert at 7 p.m. June 4 at St. Augustine Beach Pier & Pavilion, 350 A1A Beach Blvd., free, 347-8007, thecivicassociation.org. CHRISTOPHER CROSS The five-time Grammy-winning singer-songwriter, accompanied by the Jacksonville Symphony Orchestra, appears at 6 p.m. June 6 at Metropolitan Park, 1410 Gator Bowl Blvd., Downtown, $84, 354-5547, jaxsymphony.org. FOUR CENTURIES OF KEYBOARD MUSIC, PART TWO In the second of a series of performances and commentaries, pianist Rosalind J. Elson plays works of Pezold, Frescobaldi, Purcell, Haydn, Grieg and Cruse, 3 p.m. June 6 at Shepherd of the Woods Lutheran Church, 7860 Southside Blvd., Southside, free, 641-8385. INTERMEZZO CONCERT @ MAIN Navy Band Southeast’s Brass Quintet, Windward Brass, performs music ranging from traditional brass quintet literature and patriotic fare to Broadway hits and the popular music of today. The concert includes selections by W.C. Handy, Victor Ewald, John Philip Sousa, Ludwig Maurer, Armed Forces Medley and more, at 3 p.m. June 8 at Main Library’s Hicks Auditorium, 303 N. Laura St., Downtown, 630-2665, jplmusic.blogspot.com. MUSIC THROUGH THE AGES Duo Proto group (Victor Huls, cello, Max Huls, violin) plays at 6 p.m. June 8 and the Chamber Orchestra with Carolyn Snyder on flute, June 13 both at All Saints Episcopal Church, 4171 Hendricks Ave., San Marco, free, 737-8488. SUMMER JAZZ SERIES This outdoor two-concert series, featuring The Sax Pack and Nick Colionne, is held at 5 p.m. June 8 and July 13 at SeaWalk Pavilion, Jax Beach, free, jacksonvillebeach.org. MUSIC BY THE SEA David Gerald Blues Band plays 7 p.m.; food service from Tailgate Toby BBQ and Stoked & Smoked BBQ 6 p.m., June 8 at St. Augustine Beach Pier & Pavilion, 350 A1A Beach Blvd., free, 347-8007, thecivicassociation.org.

ART WALKS, FESTIVALS & MARKETS

GRIM TALES: Artist Clay Doran displays original drawings and paintings and releases the first edition of his comic Grim Times on June 7 at CoRK East Gallery, Riverside. SISTERS IN CRIME The Florida Sisters in Crime gather at 10:30 a.m. June 7 at Southeast Regional Library, 10599 Deerwood Park Blvd., Jacksonville. Vic DiGenti, aka Parker Francis (The Suspense is Killing Me), is the featured speaker. Books about crime are discussed at 2 p.m. June 13 and the second Fri. of each month at Panera, 9301 Atlantic Blvd., Southside, floridasistersincrime.com. SCULPTURE WALK JAX The Cultural Council of Greater Jacksonville invites artists to submit pieces for Sculpture Walk Jax, a Spark Grant project and temporary juried exhibit of 10 large-scale sculptures for Main Street Park. Entry deadline is June 30. For details, go to sculpturewalkjax.files. wordpress.com/2014/03/sculpture-walk_calltoartists.pdf. PHANTOM AUDITIONS Orange Park Community Theatre audition roles for Yestin & Kopit’s Phantom, The Musical, 7 p.m. June 8 and 9. Production dates are Aug. 29-Sept. 21. Bring sheet music, be prepared to sing 16 bars. An accompanist is provided; no recorded music; opct.org. CREATIVE DRAMA SUMMER CAMPS Atlantic Beach Experimental Theatre holds one-week and two-week age-appropriate camps, for grades 1-9, starting June 9, at Grage Cultural Center, 716 Ocean Blvd., Atlantic Beach, $160-$320, 249-7177, abettheatre.com. GROOVY SUMMER CAMP This summer camp travels back to the 1960s; as kids sing and dance to the music of Motown, Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons, The Beatles and more. June 9-July 3 (9 a.m. Mon.-Fri.) at Theatre Jacksonville, 2032 San Marco Blvd., San Marco, $500, 396-4425, theatrejax.com. FISHING, SAILING, THE BEACH & THE SEA The Art Center Premier Gallery invites artists to submit works depicting the water and water sports, through July 9, at 50 N. Laura St., Downtown. The exhibit opens July 10 and continues through Sept. 2. For applications, go to tacjacksonville.org. ACTEEN STAGE LAB Children and teens in grades 6-12 learn street style and ambush theater at 6:30 p.m. every Wed. at Limelight Theatre, $80 per session, 825-1164, limelighttheatre.org. CALL TO ARTISTS The Art Center seeks photographers and video artists to present slide shows or videos at Art Walk at its studios. Artists must have their own projection equipment. $25 fee, for details, email reidartlaw@gmail.com. FIGURE DRAWING TAC II hosts figure-drawing sessions with a live model at 7 p.m. every Tue. (no session during the week of First Wednesday Art Walk) at TAC II, 229 N. Hogan St., Downtown, $5-$10, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org.

FIRST WEDNESDAY ART WALK This month’s downtown art walk “Summer in the City” includes a Hemming Plaza Beer Garden from 5-8:30 p.m. June 4 with live music by Navy Band Southeast’s Dixieland Band 6-8 p.m. and Better State Crew’s art zone. Miniature golf, corn hold and jumbo jenga are set up. The Food Truck Village moves to a new location at the Laura Street Trio lot with a confirmed lineup of Baby’s Badass Burgers, Dagwood’s, Super Foods and J&T Coffee Company. The monthly art walk, held 5-9 p.m. every first Wed. of the month, features more than 13 live music venues, more than 13 hotspots open after 9 p.m. and 50 total participating venues. spanning 15 blocks in Downtown Jacksonville. downtownjacksonville.org/marketing; iloveartwalk.com. AFFAIR IN THE SQUARE The biannual event features live music, a free “guerilla yoga class” for all levels with instructor Melissa Hirschman, after-hours shopping, 6-9 p.m. June 5 in San Marco’s Balis Park. DOWNTOWN FRIDAY MARKET Arts and crafts, local produce, 10 a.m.-2 p.m. June 6 and every Fri. at The Jacksonville Landing, 2 Independent Dr., Downtown, 353-1188. FIRST FRIDAY ART WALK The tour of more than 15 Art Galleries of St. Augustine is held June 6 and every first Fri., 829-0065. RIVERSIDE ARTS MARKET Local and regional art, local music, food artists and a farmers market are featured, 10 a.m.-4 p.m. June 7 and every Sat. under the Fuller Warren Bridge, 715 Riverside Ave., free admission, 389-2449, riversideartsmarket.com. JAX BEACH ART WALK More than 30 local artists display works, 5-9 p.m. June 10 and every second Tue., along First Street between Beach Boulevard and Fifth Avenue North, Jax Beach, betterjaxbeach.com/jax-beach-art-walk.html. ARTRAGEOUS ART WALK Downtown Fernandina Beach galleries are open for self-guided tours, 5:30-8:30 p.m. June 14 and every second Sat., 277-0717, ameliaisland.com. NORTH BEACHES ART WALK Galleries of Atlantic and Neptune beaches are open 5-9 p.m. June 19 and every third Thur. from Sailfish Drive in Atlantic Beach to Neptune Beach and Town Center, 249-2222, nbaw.org. UPTOWN SATURDAY NIGHT The self-guided tour features galleries, antique stores and shops open 5-9 p.m. June 28 and every last Sat. in St. Augustine’s San Marco District, 824-3152.

MUSEUMS

ALEXANDER BREST MUSEUM & GALLERY Jacksonville University, 2800 University Blvd. N., Arlington, 256-7371, arts.ju.edu. The permanent collection features carved ivory, Chinese porcelain, pre-Colombian artifacts and more. AMELIA ISLAND MUSEUM OF HISTORY 233 S. Third St., Fernandina Beach, 261-7378, ameliamuseum.org. The children’s exhibit Discovery Ship allows kids to pilot the ship, hoist flags and learn about the history of Fernandina’s harbor.


A&E // ARTS Augustine Camera Club’s third annual Juried Member Photography Show is on display through July 24. ST. AUGUSTINE ART ASSOCIATION 22 Marine St., 824-2310, staaa.org. In the annual Honors Show, artists who have won in past St. Augustine art exhibits are invited to display new works in the season finale, June 6-July 6. SOUTHLIGHT GALLERY 201 N. Hogan St., Ste. 100, Downtown, 553-6361, southlightgallery.com. Outside In opens with a reception, featuring live music by Jennifer Chase and live painting by Kevin Arthur and friends from 6-9 p.m. June 4. The exhibit continues (11 a.m.-3 p.m. Tue.-Fri.) through June 20. SPACE:EIGHT GALLERY 228 W. King St., St. Augustine, 8292838, spaceeight.com. Features lowbrow, pop surrealism, street and underground art by nationally and internationally acclaimed artists.

To submit your arts-related event, email djohnson@folioweekly.com. Print deadline is 4 p.m. Mon., nine days before publication.

THE FIRST CUT: Nicola Barsaleau, a University of Florida graduate who grew up in South Africa, specializes in intricate relief prints depicting nature. Barsaleau’s Incubation (pictured) is featured during American Craftsmen, opening at St. Augustine’s Plum Gallery during First Friday Art Walk on June 6; it continues through August. CRISP-ELLERT ART MUSEUM Flagler College, 48 Sevilla St., St. Augustine, 826-8530, flagler.edu/crispellert. Lily Kuonen’s exhibit PLAYNTINGSSGNITNYALP continues through June 20. Open 11 a.m.-4 p.m. Mon.-Fri. CUMMER MUSEUM OF ART & GARDENS 829 Riverside Ave., Riverside, 356-6857, cummer.org. Art collectors share the pieces that inspired their love of collecting in Collector’s Choice: Inside the Hearts and Minds of Regional Collectors, which continues through Sept. 14. FSU Professor William Walmsley displays his works through July 8. The Human Figure: Sculptures by Enzo Torcoletti is on display through September. A Commemoration of the Civil Rights Movement: Photography from the High Museum of Art is on display through Nov. 2. KARPELES MANUSCRIPT MUSEUM 101 W. First St., Springfield, 356-2992, rain.org. The permanent collection includes several rare manuscripts. Revisiting French Light, Florida Light, an exhibit held in cooperation with the Sister Cities Association and Nantes, France, features watercolors, oils and acrylics by Gordon Meggison; it’s on display through June 28. MANDARIN MUSEUM & HISTORICAL SOCIETY11964 Mandarin Rd., 268-0784, mandarinmuseum.net. The exhibit The Maple Leaf, which features artifacts and information from the Civil War era, runs through December. MUSEUM OF CONTEMPORARY ART JACKSONVILLE 333 N. Laura St., Downtown, 366-6911, mocajacksonville. com. Shaun Thurston’s Project Atrium: One Spark continues through June 6. The exhibit New York Times Magazine Photographs, curated by Kathy Ryan and Lesley Martin, runs through Aug. 24. Recently named a fellow in the 2013-’14 Working Artist Project at the Museum of Contemporary Art of Georgia, Scott Ingram exhibits a survey collection of drawings and objects through Aug. 24. The museum offers free admission, 5-9 p.m. June 5 and every Thur., through Aug. 24. MUSEUM OF SCIENCE & HISTORY 1025 Museum Circle, Southbank, 396-6674, themosh.org. Uncovering the Past: Archaeological Discoveries of North Florida is on display through August. French in Florida Gallery, digital reproductions of engravings of 16th century Florida, chronicling the French attempt to establish a settlement in Florida and their experiences with the Timucua Indians, is on display through July 6. First Friday Cosmic Concerts feature the music of Jimmy Buffett at 7 p.m., Laseropolis at 8 p.m., Pink Floyd: Dark Side of the Moon at 9 p.m. and Metallica at 10 p.m. June 6 and every first Fri. (with rotating bands’ music). WORLD GOLF HALL OF FAME & MUSEUM Honoring the Legacy: A Tribute to African-Americans in Golf – featuring photographs, audio, video and memorabilia from the late 1800s to the present – is open in the permanent collection.

GALLERIES

ABSOLUTE AMERICANA ART GALLERY 77 Bridge St., St. Augustine, 824-5545, absoluteamericana.com. Original Pierre Matisse prints are featured. Two collections of original works by John Pacovsky are on display through June 20. Exhibits

are erotic in nature, and patrons must be 18 years old and older for entry. The permanent display features oil paintings, sculptures and prints from international artists. ALLEN LAND GROUP GALLERY 7220 Financial Way, Ste. 400, Southside, artworksforfreedom.org. A Painter, a Printmaker, a Photographer and Candlestick Makers features the works of Jessie Barnes, Jack Allen and Laird. Proceeds f benefit ArtWorks for Freedom, a nonprofit organization that fights modern slavery and human trafficking. The exhibit opens 6-9 p.m. on June 19. AMIRO ART & FOUND 9C Aviles St., St. Augustine, 824-8460, amiroartandfound.com. By the Sea – an exhibit of works by Jeanine Maleno, Jim McBride, Nancy Hamlin-Vogler, Deane Kellogg and Wendy Mandel McDaniel – opens during First Friday Art Walk, 5-9 p.m. June 6 and is on display through June. THE ART CENTER MAIN GALLERY 31 W. Adams St., Downtown, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org. Paintings, pastels, sketches and photography by a diverse group of member artists are displayed. THE ART CENTER PREMIER GALLERY 50 N. Laura St., Downtown, 355-1757, tacjacksonville.org. Jacksonville Life, an exhibit of “things that made our city great,” continues through July 8. BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS 869 Stockton St., Ste. 1, Riverside, 855-1181. CoRK Arts District’s Crystal Floyd displays mixed media, terrariums and special-edition screen prints created with Bold Bean espresso mixed with the ink. BUTTERFIELD GARAGE ART GALLERY 137 King St., St. Augustine, 825-4577, butterfieldgarage.com. The artist-run gallery features a wide range of traditional and contemporary works by several local artists. CoRK ARTS DISTRICT 2689 Rosselle St., Riverside, http:// corkartsdistrict.tumblr.com. Clay Doran releases the first edition of his comic Grim Times and displays original drawings and paintings at a reception with food, drink and live music June 7 in CoRK East Gallery. Eva, Chase, Wood? – a collaborative exhibition of paintings and performance – features the acting of Eva Matthews, Tony Wood’s paintings and music performed by Jennifer Chase and Lauren Fincham, 8 p.m. June 13 and 14 at CoRK North Gallery, 603 King St., Riverside, $10-$12, artful.ly/store/events/2806. CORSE GALLERY & ATELIER 4144 Herschel St., Riverside, 388-8205, corsegalleryatelier.com. Works on permanent display feature those by Kevin Beilfuss, Eileen Corse, Miro Sinovcic, Maggie Siner, Alice Williams and Luana Luconi Winner. THE CULTURAL CENTER AT PONTE VEDRA BEACH50 Executive Way, Ponte Vedra Beach, 280-0614. Under the Tall Sky, mixed-media artworks by Barbara Holmes-Fryfield and ceramic sculptures by Fay Samimi, continues through July 3. ECHO III 400 E. Bay St. (near Underbelly), Downtown. Photographer Elena Rodriguez organizes a pop-up exhibit of local photographers’ works, 6-9 p.m. June 7. The photographs are also on display 6-10 p.m. June 4 during First Wednesday Art Walk. FIRST STREET GALLERY 216-B First St., Neptune Beach, 241-6928, firststreetgalleryart.com. The 12th annual Sea Turtle Show – featuring clay, jewelry, paintings, photography,

metal and glass in sea turtle theme – runs through July 7. The exhibit is a fundraiser for the Beaches Sea Turtle Patrol. FLORIDA MINING GALLERY 5300 Shad Rd., Southside, 4252845, floridamininggallery.com. Diogenes The Dog & Ryan Rummel, an exhibit of approximately 20 pieces from each artist, continues through July 3. THE GALLERY AT HOUSE OF STEREO 8780 Perimeter Park Ct., Ste. 100, Southside, 642-6677, houseofstereo.com. Painting, art glass, photography, woodcrafts, pottery and sculpture are featured. GEORGIA NICK GALLERY 11A Aviles St., St. Augustine, 806-3348, georgianickgallery.com. The artist-owned studio displays Nick’s sea and landscape photography, along with local works by oil painters, a mosaic artist, potter, photographer and author. HASKELL GALLERY & DISPLAY CASES Jacksonville International Airport, 14201 Pecan Park Rd., Northside, 741-3546. Keith Doles’ Street Series and Street Corners is displayed through June 29 in Haskell Gallery located before security. Dorian Eng’s Chinese and Japanese art in the form of threaded balls and thimbles called Temari and Yubinuki is displayed through July 7 in Connector Bridge Art display case before security. Marsha Glaziere’s Eclectic Coffee Spots in Puget Sound is a collection of paintings, photographs and impressions, displayed through July 5 in Concourse A and C display cases after security. HIGHWAY GALLERY floridamininggallery.com. Nine artists – Nathaniel Artkart Price, Ken Daga, Ashley C. Waldvogel, Brianna Angelakis, Christina Foard, Linda Olsen, Sara Pedigo, Zach Fitchner and Russell Maycumber – are featured on digital billboards throughout the city in collaboration with Clear Channel through July. J. JOHNSON GALLERY 177 Fourth Ave. N., Jax Beach, 435-3200. Ex Libris — featuring works by Cara Barer, Doug Beube, Long-Bin Chen, Brian Dettmer, Jessica Drenk, Andrew Hayes, Alexander Korzer-Robinson, Guy Laramee and Francesca Pastine — includes pieces made by carving, cutting, folding and assembling books, encyclopedias and other bound literature journals. The exhibit is on display through June 13. THE LOOKING LAB 107 E. Bay St., Downtown, 917-2393772. Art in Empty Store Fronts features multimedia video art and sculptures by Crystal Floyd and David Montgomery. PLAYERS BY THE SEA GALLERY 106 Sixth St. N, Jax Beach, 249-0289, playersbythesea.org, deformanceart.com. Stimulation/Manipulation, Liz Gibson’s new mixed-media work, is displayed during PBTS’s run of Venus in Fur, June 6-21. PLUM GALLERY 9 Aviles St., St. Augustine, 825-0069, plumartgallery.com. American Craftsmen – an exhibit that features mixed-media sculptures, fine handcrafted furniture, stained glass and linocut prints – opens with a reception held 5-9 p.m. June 6 during First Friday Art Walk and is on display through August. The exhibit features the works by Nicola Barsaleau, Meagan Chaney Gumpert, Jessie Cook, Duke Darnold and Rachel deCuba. ROTUNDA GALLERY St. Johns County Administrative Building, 500 San Sebastian View, St. Augustine. The St.

JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 39


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KIDS EAT FREE! MONDAY NIGHTS! MAPLE STREET — SAN MARCO, JAX BEACH

Photo by Caron Streibich

LOCAL BEER NIGHT! AWESOME FOOD! GREAT SERVICE!

BANG BANG — CHICAGO

Photo by Morgan Burden

BATTLE OF THE BISCUITS In which we pit Chicago’s famed Bang Bang against our own Maple Street

E

(Next to Target)

40 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

n route to Chicago for Memorial Day weekend, I grabbed a copy of June’s Food & Wine from the airport bookshop, because this is what I do. And while thumbing though Food & Wine, I landed on a small feature called “Where to Find America’s Best Biscuits,” and noticed happily that our very own Maple Street Biscuit Company (410 N. Third St., Jax Beach and 2004 San Marco Blvd.) was featured alongside noteworthy spots in the Big Apple, Asheville, Portland and — hey, what do you know? — Chicago. Touted as sour cream-based biscuits that are baked hourly, Chicago’s Bang Bang Pie & Biscuits was quickly added to my must-eat trip list — along with tacos at Big Star, anything and everything at Girl & the Goat, dessert at Mindy’s Hot Chocolate, deep dish pizza at Pequod’s and Asian fusion at Sunda. As I waited in line for Bang Bang to open Sunday morning, the smell of butter wafted through the air. Inside, Bang Bang is small, with large windows, brick walls and an open kitchen, with seating for only about 10. A spacious backyard courtyard with two rows of white picnic tables offers another 40 seats. The spot feels rural and charming, a relaxed vibe for your pending calorie-bender. © noshing 2014on the Bacon Biscuit, I had While a thought: What if I pitted these two caloric champions, Bang Bang and Maple Street, against each other? How would our local fare compare to that of the Windy City, a place with (supposedly) a much richer foodie culture? In this corner was my Maple Street go-to, the Garden Egg, made with butter only — no lard — and served stacked with collard greens, a fried egg and a drizzle of hot sauce. In the other corner was Bang Bang’s Bacon Biscuit, served open-face with thick strips of candied Applewood smoked bacon, collard greens, homemade Fresno chili hot sauce and a sunnyside-up poached egg — noticeably larger and much denser (perhaps from the sour cream?) than Maple Street’s Southern-style biscuit. Let’s get it on.

Maple Street (MS) vs. Bang Bang (BB) NAME/PRICE

(MS) The Garden Egg ($5), (BB) Bacon ($7) Advantage: MS ROUND 1: DESCRIPTION

(MS) Flaky biscuit, fried egg, collard greens, splashed with hot sauce (BB) Biscuit, candied bacon, collard greens, hot sauce, sunny-side-up egg Advantage: TIE ROUND 2: BISCUIT

(MS) Flaky, buttery, light, fluffy, smallish. Slightly golden exterior. (BB) Dense, tender substantial, big. Slightly browned exterior crust. Advantage: MS ROUND 3: COLLARDS

(MS) Flavorful, smoky, pieces of pork. (BB) Overpowered by the candied bacon. Advantage: MS ROUND 4: THE EGG

(MS) Fried, with a runny yolk that drips down the sides of the collards and biscuit. (BB) Artfully presented, needs to be runnier. Advantage: MS ROUND 5: BACON

(MS) N/A (BB) Abundant, thick, sweet, smoky. Advantage: BB ROUND 6: ATMOSPHERE

(MS) Casual, comfortable, open, rustic. (BB) Rustic, open, large outdoor area with picnic tables and umbrellas around back. Advantage: BB WINNER: MAPLE STREET

As an entire package — the biscuit and its accoutrements — Maple Street was, to my mind, a clear winner. I enjoyed Bang Bang, but it just didn’t have the same wow factor as our local heroes. Caron Streibich biteclub@folioweekly.com facebook/folioweeklybitesized


DINING DIRECTORY To have your restaurant listed, contact your account manager or Sam Taylor, 904.260.9770 ext. 111 staylor@folioweekly.com DINING DIRECTORY KEY

Average Entrée Cost $ = Less than 8 $$ = $8- $14 $$$ = $15- $22 $$$$ = $23 & up BW = Beer/Wine FB = Full Bar K = Kids’ Menu TO = Take Out B = Breakfast R = Brunch L = Lunch D = Dinner Bite Club = Hosted a free Folio Weekly Bite Club tasting. Join at fwbiteclub.com. BOJ = 2013 Best of Jax winner F = FW distribution spot $

AMELIA ISLAND, FERNANDINA BEACH, YULEE

29 SOUTH EATS, 29 S. Third St., 277-7919. F In historic downtown, the popular bistro’s Chef Scotty Schwartz serves traditional world cuisine with a modern twist. $$ L Tue.-Sat.; D Mon.-Sat.; R Sun. BRETT’S WATERWAY CAFÉ, 1 S. Front St., 261-2660. F Southern hospitality in an upscale waterfront spot; daily specials, fresh local seafood, aged beef. $$$ FB K L D Daily CAFÉ KARIBO, 27 N. Third St., 277-5269. F In a historic building, family-owned spot serves worldly taste fare: homemade veggie burgers, fresh seafood, made-fromscratch desserts. Dine in or on oak-shaded patio. Karibrew Pub offers beer brewed onsite. $$ FB K TO R, Sun.; L D Daily CIAO ITALIAN BISTRO, 302 Centre St., 206-4311. Owners Luke and Kim Misciasci offer fine dining: veal piccata, rigatoni Bolognese, antipasto; house specialties are chicken Ciao, homemade-style meat lasagna. $ L Fri. & Sat.; D Nightly DAVID’S RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, 802 Ash St., 310-6049. In Historic District. Fresh seafood, prime aged meats, rack of lamb served in an elegant, chic spot. $$$$ FB D Nightly DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 474313 E. S.R. 200, 491-3469. 450077 S.R. 200, Callahan, 879-0993. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily JACK & DIANE’S, 708 Centre St., 321-1444. F In a renovated 1887 shotgun house. Favorites: jambalaya, French toast, mac-n-cheese, vegan, vegetarian selections. Dine inside or on the porch. $$ FB K B L D Daily LULU’S AT THE THOMPSON HOUSE, 11 S. Seventh St., 432-8394. F Creative lunch: po’boys, salads, little plates served in a historic house. Dinner: fresh local seafood, Fernandina shrimp. Reservations recommended. $$$ BW K TO R Sun.; L D Tue.-Sat. MOON RIVER PIZZA, 925 S. 14th St., 321-3400. F BOJ winner. Northern-style pizzas, with more than 20 toppings, are served by the pie or the slice. $ BW TO L D Mon.-Sat. THE MUSTARD SEED CAFE, 833 TJ Courson Rd., 277-3141. Awarded Snail of Approval. Casual organic eatery and juice bar, in Nassau Health Foods. All-natural organic items, smoothies, juice, coffee, herbal tea. $$ TO B L Mon.-Sat. THE PECAN ROLL BAKERY, 122 S. Eighth St., 491-9815. Sweet and savory pastries, cookies, cakes and breads. Everything’s made from scratch. $ TO B L Wed.-Sun. PLAE, 80 Amelia Village Cir., 277-2132. Bite Club certified. Omni Amelia Island Plantation Spa & Shops. Bistro-style venue has an innovative menu: whole fried fish and duck breast. Outdoor dining. $$$ FB D Mon.-Sat. SALTY PELICAN BAR & GRILL, 12 N. Front St., 277-3811. F See ICW sunsets from second-story outdoor bar. Owners T.J. and Al offer local seafood, Mayport shrimp, fish tacos, po’boys, original broiled cheese oysters. $$ FB K L D Daily SLIDERS SEASIDE GRILL, 1998 S. Fletcher Ave., 277-6652. F BOJ. Oceanfront place serves award-winning handmade crab cakes, fresh seafood, fried pickles. Outdoor dining, open-air 2nd floor, balcony. $$ FB K L D Daily T-RAY’S BURGER STATION, 202 S. 8th St., 261-6310. F This spot in an old gas station offers blue plate specials, burgers, biscuits & gravy, shrimp. $ BW TO B L Mon.-Sat.

ARLINGTON, REGENCY

DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 9119 Merrill Rd., Ste. 19 & 20, 745-9301. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 8818 Atlantic Blvd., 720-0106. See Mandarin. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1301 Monument Rd., Ste. 5, 724-5802. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily

AVONDALE, ORTEGA

THE CASBAH CAFÉ, 3628 St. Johns Ave., 981-9966. F BOJ winner. Middle Eastern/Mediterranean fare. Patio, hookah lounge. Wi-Fi, bellydancers. $$ BW L D Daily CLAUDE’S CHOCOLATES, 3543 St. Johns Ave., 829-5790. F In Green Man Gourmet, this shop has wines, spices, fresh fruit ice pops and Belgian chocolates. See Ponte Vedra. $$ TO ESPETO BRAZILIAN STEAK HOUSE, 4000 St. Johns Ave., Ste. 40, 388-4884. F Churrascaria gauchos carve the meat onto your plate from serving tables. $$$ FB D Tue.-Sun. THE FOX RESTAURANT, 3580 St. Johns Ave., 387-2669. F Owners Ian & Mary Chase offer fresh diner fare: burgers, meatloaf, fried green tomatoes, desserts. Breakfast all day. Local landmark for 50+ years. $$ BW K L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 4530 St. Johns Ave., 388-8828. F See Mandarin. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 3611 St. Johns

Ave., 388-0200. F Bite Club. BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ BW K TO L D Daily MOJO NO. 4 URBAN BBQ & WHISKEY BAR, 3572 St. Johns Ave., 381-6670. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $$ FB K TO L D Daily PINEGROVE MARKET & DELI, 1511 Pinegrove Ave., 389-8655. F BOJ winner. For 40+ years serving hearty fare: Cuban sandwiches, burgers, subs, wraps, homemade chicken salad, in a family spot. Onsite butcher shop cuts USDA choice prime aged beef. Craft beers. $ BW TO B L D Mon.-Sat. SIMPLY SARA’S, 2902 Corinthian Ave., Ortega, 3871000. F Down-home cooking from scratch: eggplant fries, pimento cheese, baked chicken, fruit cobblers, chicken & dumplings, desserts. BYOB. $$ K TO L D Mon.-Sat., B Sat.

BAYMEADOWS

AL’S PIZZA, 8060 Philips Hwy., Ste. 105, 731-4300. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily BROADWAY RISTORANTE & PIZZERIA, Ste. 3, 10920 Baymeadows Rd. E., 519-8000. F Family-owned-andoperated Italian pizzeria serves calzones, strombolis, wings, brick-oven-baked pizza, subs, desserts. Delivery. $$ BW K TO L D Daily INDIA’S RESTAURANT, 9802 Baymeadows Rd., Ste. 8, 620-0777. F Authentic Indian cuisine, lunch buffet. Curries, vegetable dishes, lamb, chicken, shrimp, fish tandoori. $$ BW L Mon.-Sat.; D Nightly LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 8206 Philips Hwy., Baymeadows Junction, 732-9433. F See Mandarin. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., 7377740. 8616 Baymeadows Rd., 739-2498. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily PIZZA PALACE RESTAURANT & PIZZERIA, 3928 Baymeadows Rd., 527-8649. F Relaxed, family-owned place serves homestyle cuisine. Local faves include spinach pizza, chicken spinach calzones, ravioli, lasagna, parmigiana. Outside dining; HD TVs. $$ BW K TO L D Daily SNEAKERS SPORTS GRILLE, 8133 Point Meadows Dr., 519-0509. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K L D Daily ZESTY INDIA, 8358 Point Meadows Dr., 329-3676. Chefs combine Asian methodology with European template to create dishes like tandoori lamb chops and rosemary tikka. Vegetarian items are cooked separately in vegetable oil. $ BW TO L D Tue.-Sun.

BEACHES

(Locations are Jax Beach unless otherwise noted.)

AL’S PIZZA, 303 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Ctr., Atlantic Beach, 249-0002. F BOJ winner. Celebrating more than 20 years, Al’s is a repeat Best Pizza winner in the annual BOJ readers’ poll. New York-style and gourmet pizzas. All-day happy hour Mon.-Thur. $ FB K TO L D Daily BREEZY COFFEE SHOP CAFE, 235 Eighth Ave. S., 241-2211. F Casual, family-owned shop serves fresh-baked goods, espressos, locally roasted coffees, vegan and gluten-free options. Sandwiches, local beer. $ BW K TO B R L Daily BUDDHA THAI BISTRO, 301 10th Ave. N., 712-4444. The proprietors are from Thailand; every dish is made with fresh ingredients, beautifully presented. $$ FB TO L D Daily CASA MARIA, 2429 S. Third St., 372-9000. F Familyowned-and-operated place offers authentic Mexican fare: fajitas and seafood dishes, hot sauces made in-house. The specialty is tacos de asada. $ FB K L D Daily CRUISERS GRILL, 319 23rd Ave. S., 270-0356. F BOJ winner. Locally owned and operated for 15+ years, this casual place serves half-pound burgers, fish sandwiches, award-winning cheddar fries and sangria. $ BW K L D Daily ENGINE 15 BREWING CO., 1500 Beach Blvd., Ste. 217, 249-2337. F BOJ winner. Gastropub fare: soups, flatbreads, sandwiches, including BarBe-Cuban and beer dip. Craft beers and brew groups. $ FB K L Tue.-Sun.; D Nightly FLYING IGUANA TAQUERIA & TEQUILA BAR, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Neptune Beach, 853-5680. F Fusion of Latin American and Southwestern-influenced fare: tacos, seafood, carnitas, Cubana sandwiches. 100+ tequilas. Outdoor seating. $ FB L D Daily LANDSHARK CAFE, 1728 Third St. N., 246-6024. F Locally owned & operated. Fresh, off-the-boat local seafood, fish tacos, houseground burgers, wings, handcut fries, tater tots; daily specials. $$ FB K L D Daily; R Sun. LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1222 Third St. S., 372-4495. F See Mandarin. $$ FB TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 657 N. Third St., 247-9620. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily LILLIE’S COFFEE BAR, 200 First St., Beaches Town Ctr., Neptune Beach, 249-2922. F Locally roasted coffee, eggs, bagels, flatbreads, sandwiches, desserts. Dine indoors or out, patio and courtyard. $$ BW TO B L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 1018 Third St. N., Ste. 2, 241-5600. F Bite Club. BOJ winner. Hoagies, salads, gourmet pizzas: Mighty Meaty, vegetarian, Kosmic Karma. 35 tap beers. Nonstop happy hour. $ BW K TO L D Daily METRO DINER, 1534 Third St. N., 853-6817. F BOJ winner. See San Marco. $$ R B L Daily MEZZA RESTAURANT & BAR, 110 First St., Beaches Town Ctr., Neptune Beach, 249-5573. F Near-the-ocean eatery, 20+ years. Casual bistro fare: gourmet wood-fired pizzas, nightly specials. Dine inside or on the patio. Valet parking. $$$ FB K D Mon.-Sat.

Jeff Osborne, at the confluence of the hot bar and grocery store in Whole Foods off San Jose Boulevard in Mandarin, displays Pacific cod Provençal, chipotle corn and summer kale salad, and Jamaican-style ground chicken stew with onions, tomatoes and peppers. Photo: Dennis Ho MOJO KITCHEN BBQ PIT & BLUES BAR, 1500 Beach Blvd., 247-6636. F BOJ winner. Funky Southern blues kitchen. Pulled pork, Carolina-style barbecue, Delta fried catfish, all the sides. $$ FB K TO L D Daily M SHACK, 299 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Ctr., Atlantic Beach, 241-2599. F BOJ winner. David and Matthew Medure flippin’ burgers, hot dogs, fries, shakes, familiar fare, moderate prices. Dine inside or outside. $$ BW L D Daily POE’S TAVERN, 363 Atlantic Blvd., Atlantic Beach, 241-7637. F American gastropub named for the poet. 50+ beers, gourmet burgers, handcut fries, fish tacos, Edgar’s Drunken Chili, daily fish sandwich special. $$ FB K L D Daily RAGTIME TAVERN & SEAFOOD GRILL, 207 Atlantic Blvd., Beaches Town Ctr., Atlantic Beach, 241-7877. F For 30 years, popular seafood place has scored many awards in our BOJ readers poll. Blackened snapper, sesame tuna, Ragtime shrimp. Daily happy hour. $$ FB L D Daily SLIDERS SEAFOOD GRILLE & OYSTER BAR, 218 First St., Beaches Town Ctr., Neptune Beach, 246-0881. Beachcasual atmosphere. Customer faves: fish tacos, gumbo. Key lime pie, homemade ice cream sandwiches. $$ FB K L Sat. & Sun.; D Nightly SNEAKERS SPORTS GRILLE, 111 Beach Blvd., 482-1000. F BOJ winner. Full-service bar (with more than 20 beers on tap), TV screens covering entire walls and cheerleaders serving the food. Happy hour Mon.-Fri. $ FB K L D Daily

DOWNTOWN

AKEL’S DELICATESSEN, 21 W. Church St., 665-7324. F New York-style deli offers freshly made fare: subs (3 Wise Guys, Champ), burgers, gyros, breakfast bowls, ranchero wrap, vegetarian dishes. $ K TO B L Mon.-Fri. AMERICAN GRILL, Jacksonville Landing, 353-7522. Fullservice restaurant serves traditional fare: pot pies, steaks, burgers, pizza, pot roast, vegetarian dishes. $$ BW L D Daily BENNY’S STEAK & SEAFOOD, Jax Landing, Ste. 175, 301-1014. This steak-and-seafood house serves Continental cuisine with such signature dishes as the Filet Christian. $$$ FB K L D Daily CAFÉ NOLA at MOCAJax, 333 N. Laura St., 366-6911. F Shrimp & grits, gourmet sandwiches, fresh fish tacos, homemade desserts. $$ FB L Mon.-Fri.; D Thur. & ArtWalk CASA DORA, 108 E. Forsyth St., 356-8282. F Chef Sam Hamidi has been serving genuine Italian fare for 36+ years: veal, seafood, gourmet pizza. The homemade salad dressing is a specialty. $$ BW K L Mon.-Fri.; D Mon.-Sat. CASA MARIA, 12961 N. Main St., Ste. 104, 757-6411. F See Beaches. $ FB K L D Daily CHICAGO PIZZA & SPORTS GRILL, Jax Landing, 354-7747. F Chicago-style deep-dish pizzas, hot dogs, Italian beef dishes from Chicago’s Comastro family. $$ FB K TO L D Daily CHOMP CHOMP, 106 E. Adams St., 762-4667. F Eats at moderate prices – most less than $10. Chef-inspired street food: panko-crusted chicken, burgers, chinois tacos, bahn mi and barbecue. $ L Tue.-Sat.; D Fri. & Sat. CINCO DE MAYO, Jax Landing, 329-2892. Authentic yet mild dishes: fajitas, tacos, burritos, enchiladas. Dine indoors or outside. $$ FB L D Daily FIONN MacCOOL’S IRISH PUB & RESTAURANT, Jax Landing, Ste. 176, 374-1547. BOJ winner. This pub offers casual dining with an uptown Irish atmosphere, serving fish and chips, Guinness lamb stew and black-andtan brownies. $$ FB K L D Daily HOOTERS, Jax Landing, Ste. 103, 356-5400. The chain, popular for its waitresses, features wings, steamed shrimp, oysters, burgers, seafood, sandwiches. $$ FB TO L D Daily KOJA SUSHI, Ste. 222, Jax Landing, 350-9911. F BOJ winner. Owners John and Tony, in the sushi game for 10+ years, offer sushi, sashimi, and Japanese, Asian, Korean cuisine. Hard-to-find items like baby octopus salad, too. Dine inside or out. $$ FB L Mon.-Fri.; D Nightly VILLAGE BREAD CAFE, Ste. 175, Jax Landing, 683-7244. Locally owned; bagels, omelets, sandwiches on homestyle

bread, salads, pizzas, pastries. $ TO B L Mon.-Sat. VITO’S ITALIAN CAFE, Jax Landing, Ste. 174, 355-3002. Traditional Italian and Mediterranean menu: pasta, steak and seafood entrées. Desserts, including tiramisu and cannoli, are homemade. Daily happy hour. $ FB L D Daily ZODIAC GRILL, 120 W. Adams St., 354-8283. American favorites and Mediterranean fare in a casual atmosphere; panini, vegetarian dishes. Daily lunch buffet. Espressos, hookahs. Happy hour Mon.-Fri. $ FB L Mon.-Fri

FLEMING ISLAND

GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET, 1915 East-West Pkwy., 541-0009. F BOJ winner. See Riverside. $ BW TO Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1571 C.R. 220, Ste. 100, 215-2223. F See Mandarin. $$ FB TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 1800 Town Center Blvd., 541-1999. F Bite Club certified. BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ BW K TO L D Daily MOJO SMOKEHOUSE, 1810 Town Center Blvd., Ste. 8, 264-0636. F BOJ. See Beaches. $$ FB K TO L D Daily TAPS BAR & GRILL, 1605 C.R. 220, 278-9421. F 50+ premium tap domestic, imported beers. Starters, burgers, sandwiches, entrées, made to order with fresh ingredients. Lots of TVs for watching sports. $$ FB K L D Daily WHITEY’S FISH CAMP, 2032 C.R. 220, 269-4198. F Real fish camp serves gator tail, freshwater river catfish, daily specials, traditional meals, on Swimming Pen Creek. Outdoor Tiki bar. Come by boat, motorcycle or car. $ FB K TO L Tue.-Sun.; D Nightly

INTRACOASTAL WEST

4 BONES BARBECUE, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 20, 419-9855. Classic Southern barbecue: Pulled pork, brisket, chicken, turkey, ribs, chorizo served market-style by the pound. Mac ’n’ cheese, baked beans, cole slaw, green beans. Specialty sandwiches, banana pudding. $ K TO L D Tue.-Sat. AL’S PIZZA, 14286 Beach Blvd., Ste. 31, 223-0991. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 14286 Beach Blvd., 223-0115. F BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 14333 Beach Blvd., Ste. 39, 992-1666. F Tamales, fajitas and pork tacos are customer favorites. Some La Nops have a full bar. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., Ste. 14, 642-6980. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily THE TENT HOOKAH LOUNGE, 12041 Beach Blvd., Ste. 4, 551-2962. Authentic fare, hookahs and flavored tobacco, specials and live belly dancing and floor seating, in keeping with that authenticity thing. Open late. $ BW L D Daily TIME OUT SPORTS GRILL, 13799 Beach Blvd., Ste. 5, 223-6999. F Locally-owned-and-operated grill serves hand-tossed pizzas, wings, wraps in a clean, sporty atmosphere. Daily drink specials, HD TVs, pool tables, darts, trivia. Late-night menu. $$ FB L Tue.-Sun.; D Nightly

JULINGTON CREEK

DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 525 S.R. 16, Ste. 101, St. Johns, 825-4540. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily METRO DINER, 12807 San Jose Blvd., 638-6185. F BOJ winner. See San Marco. $$ R B L Daily TAPS BAR & GRILL, 2220 C.R. 210 W., Ste. 314, St. Johns, 819-1554. F See Fleming Island. $$ FB K L D Daily

MANDARIN

AL’S PIZZA, 11190 San Jose Blvd., 260-4115. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily ATHENS CAFÉ, 6271 St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 7, 733-1199. F From the dolmades (stuffed grape leaves) to the baby shoes (stuffed eggplant), Athens has all the favorites. Greek

JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 41


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A WEEKLY Q&A WITH PEOPLE IN THE FOOD BIZ

Pet Lovers Issue

JUNE 11

World Cup Soccer bracket

JULY 9

Newcomers & Natives Guide to N.E. Florida

AUG. 6

Bite by Bite By Cuisine

SEPT. 3

Fall Arts Preview

OCT. 8 OC

Best of Jax I

OCT. 15

Best of Jax II

OCT. 29

Top Chef’s & Menu Guide

NOV. 19

Holiday Gift Guide

DEC. 17

Last Minute Gift Guide

DEC. 24

Double Issue

beers. $$ BW L Mon.-Fri.; D Mon.-Sat. DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 10391 Old St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 1, 880-7087. F BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily HARMONIOUS MONKS, 10550 Old St. Augustine Rd., Ste. 30, 880-3040. F American-style steakhouse features Angus steaks, gourmet burgers, ribs, wraps. $$ FB K L D Mon.-Sat. KAZU JAPANESE RESTAURANT, 9965 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 35, 683-9903. The new place has a wide variety of soups, dumplings, appetizers, salads, bento boxes, sushi, entrées, maki handrolls, sashimi. $$ FB TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA, 11700 San Jose Blvd., 288-0175. F Tamales, fajitas and pork tacos are customer favorites. Some locations offer a full bar. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 11365 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 3, 674-2945. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily THE RED ELEPHANT PIZZA & GRILL, 10131 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 12, 683-3773. F This casual, family-friendly eatery serves pizzas, sandwiches, grill specials, burgers and pasta dishes. Gluten-free friendly. $ FB K L D Daily RENNA’S PIZZA, 11111 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 12, 292-2300. F Casual New York-style pizzeria. Calzones, antipasto, parmigiana, homemade breads. $$ BW K TO L D Daily

ARON’S PIZZA, 650 Park Ave., 269-1007. F Familyowned restaurant has eggplant dishes, manicotti, New York-style pizzas. $$ BW K TO L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 1540 Wells Rd., 269-2122. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily THE HILLTOP, 2030 Wells Road, 272-5959. Southern-style dining. Specialties: New Orleans shrimp, certified Black Angus prime rib, she-crab soup, desserts. $$$ FB D Tue.-Sat. KRISTIN’S ON THE RIVER, 2511 Blanding Blvd., 3899455. This newly re-opened spot serves seafood and American favorites. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 9734 Crosshill Blvd., 908-4250. 2024 Kingsley Ave., 276-2776. F See Mandarin. $$ FB TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1330 Blanding Blvd., 276-7370. 1545 C.R. 220, 278-2827. 700 Blanding Blvd., Ste. 15, 272-3553. 1401 S. Orange Ave., Green Cove Springs, 284-7789. F All over the area, they pile ’em high and serve ’em fast. Hot/cold subs, soups, salads. $ K TO B L D Daily THE ROADHOUSE, 231 Blanding Blvd., 264-0611. F Wings, sandwiches, burgers, quesadillas; 35+ years. Pool tables, darts, foosball, TVs. 75+ imported beers. $ FB L D Daily

PONTE VEDRA, NW ST. JOHNS

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998-9744. Chef Tom Gray’s place features innovative contemporary American cuisine – seafood, steaks, pork, burgers, salads, sides and desserts – using locally sourced ingredients when possible. $$$ FB K L Mon.-Fri.; D Nightly MSHACK, 10281 Midtown Pkwy., 642-5000. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $$ BW L D Daily OVINTE, 10208 Buckhead Branch Dr., 900-7730. BOJ. Tapas, small plates of Spanish and Italian flavors: ceviche fresco, pappardelle bolognese. 240-bottle wine list, 75 by the glass, craft spirits. Outdoor dining. $$ FB R, Sun.; D Nightly

NAME: Steven R. Soper RESTAURANT: Palm Valley Fish Camp, 299 N. Roscoe Blvd., Ponte Vedra BIRTHPLACE: Hilton Head Island YEARS IN THE BIZ: 21 FAVORITE RESTAURANT (other than mine): Any place serving bangin’ sushi. FAVORITE CUISINE STYLE: Southern fusion; non-cooking style: sushi! GO-TO INGREDIENTS: Fresh fish, bacon, bacon fat, butter IDEAL MEAL: Fresh salmon lox on a foreign beach, with Champagne and my wife. WILL NOT CROSS MY LIPS: Any bugs. INSIDER’S SECRET: It really does make us happy to make you smile. CULINARY TREAT: Anything with cheese and chocolate; white chocolate gorgonzola on a filet. To die for!

ORANGE PARK, MIDDLEBURG

JUNE 4

DINING DIRECTORY

AL’S PIZZA, 635 A1A N., 543-1494. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily CLAUDE’S CHOCOLATES, 145 Hilden Rd., Ste. 122, 829-5790. Hand-crafted in the onsite factory, with premium Belgian chocolate, fruits, nuts and spices. Cookies and popsicles. Claude’s will ship your order. $$ TO LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 830 A1A N., Ste. 6, 273-3993. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily RESTAURANT MEDURE, 818 A1A N., 543-3797. Chef David Medure creates with a wide range of global flavors. The lounge offers small plates, creative drinks and entertainment, including happy hour twice daily. $$$ FB D Mon.-Sat.

RIVERSIDE, 5 POINTS, WESTSIDE

AL’S PIZZA, 1620 Margaret St., Ste. 201, 388-8384. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily BLACK SHEEP RESTAURANT, 1534 Oak St., 355-3793. BOJ winner. New American favorites with a Southern twist, made with locally sourced ingredients. Awesome rooftop bar. $$$ FB R Sat. & Sun.; L D Daily BOLD BEAN COFFEE ROASTERS, 869 Stockton St., Stes. 1-2, 855-1181. F BOJ winner. Small-batch, artisanal coffee roasting. Organic, fair trade. $ BW TO B L Daily CORNER TACO, 818 Post St., 240-0412. Made-from-scratch “semi-swanky street food,” tacos, nachos, gluten-free and vegetarian options. $ BW L D Tue.-Sun. DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 5972 San Juan Ave., Westside, 693-9258. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily

SAN JOSE, LAKEWOOD

GRASSROOTS NATURAL MARKET, 2007 Park St., 384-4474. F BOJ. Juice bar has certified organic fruit, vegetables. Artisanal cheese, 300+ craft/import beer, organic wines, produce, meats, wraps, raw, vegan. $ BW TO B L D Daily HAWKERS, 1001 Park St., 508-0342. The new spot is based on Asian street vendors. A collection of hawker recipes is served under one roof. $ BW TO L D Daily LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 1509 Margaret St., 674-2794. 7895 Normandy Blvd., 781-7600. 5733 Roosevelt Blvd., Westside, 446-9500. 8102 Blanding Blvd., Westside, 779-1933. F See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily METRO DINER, 4495 Roosevelt Blvd., Ortega, 999-4600. F BOJ winner. See San Marco. $$ R B L Daily MOON RIVER PIZZA, 1176 Edgewood Ave. S., 389-4442. F BOJ winner. See Amelia Island. $ BW TO L D Mon.-Sat. THE MOSSFIRE GRILL, 1537 Margaret St., 355-4434. F Southwestern dishes like fresh fish tacos and chicken enchiladas are popular. Happy hour runs Mon.-Sat. in the upstairs lounge, and all day Sun. $$ FB K L D Daily O’BROTHERS IRISH PUB, 1521 Margaret St., 854-9300. F Traditional Irish fare like shepherd’s pie with Stilton crust, Guinness mac-n-cheese and fish-n-chips. Outdoor patio dining is available. $$ FB K TO L D Daily SUN-RAY CINEMA, 1028 Park St., 359-0049. F Beer (Bold City, Intuition Ale Works), wine, pizza, hot dogs, hummus, sandwiches, popcorn, nachos, brownies. $$ BW Daily

ST. AUGUSTINE

AL’S PIZZA, 1 St. George St., 824-4383. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ FB K TO L D Daily AVILES RESTAURANT & LOUNGE, 32 Avenida Menendez, 829-2277. F Hilton Bayfront Hotel. Progressive Europeanflavored menu; made-to-order pasta night, wine dinners, chophouse nights, deluxe breakfast buffet. Sun. champagne brunch bottomless mimosas. Free valet. $$$ FB K B L D Daily CANDLELIGHT SOUTH, 1 Anastasia Blvd., 819-0588. F Brand-new on the island, the casual restaurant originally in Scarsdale, N.Y., offers fish tacos, sandwiches, wings, desserts and sangria. Daily specials. $ BW K TO L D Daily CARMELO’S MARKETPLACE & PIZZERIA, 146 King St., 494-6658. F New York-style brick-oven-baked pizza, fresh sub rolls, Boar’s Head meats, cheeses, garlic herb wings. Outdoor seating, Wi-Fi. $$ BW TO L D Daily CLAUDE’S CHOCOLATES, 6 Granada St., 829-5790. Inside The Market. Wine and chocolate pairings, soft-serve ice cream, a coffee bar, fresh fruit ice pops, cookies. $$ TO CRUISERS GRILL, 3 St. George St., 824-6993. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ BW K L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 4010 U.S. 1 S., 547-2669. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily THE FLORIDIAN, 39 Cordova St., 829-0655. Updated Southern fare: fresh, local ingredients from area farms. Vegetarian, gluten-free, too. Fried green tomato bruschetta, grits with shrimp, fish or tofu. $$$ BW K TO L D Wed.-Mon. GYPSY CAB COMPANY, 828 Anastasia Blvd., Anastasia Island, 824-8244. F A mainstay for a quarter-century, Gypsy’s menu changes twice daily. Signature dish is Gypsy chicken. Seafood, tofu, duck, veal. $$ FB R Sun.; L D Daily HARRY’S SEAFOOD BAR & GRILLE, 46 Avenida Menendez, 824-7765. F New Orleans-style. Cajun, Creole, Southern flavors with a modern twist: fresh seafood, steaks, pork, jambalaya, shrimp. Daily happy hour. $$ FB K TO L D Daily LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 155 Hampton Point Dr., 230-7879. F See Mandarin. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 410 Anastasia Blvd., 826-4040. F Bite Club certified. BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ BW K TO L D Daily MOJO OLD CITY BBQ, 5 Cordova St., 342-5264. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $$ FB K TO L D Daily PACIFIC ASIAN BISTRO, 159 Palencia Village Dr., Ste. 111, 808-1818. F BOJ winner. Chef Mas Lui creates 30+ unique sushi rolls; fresh sea scallops, Hawaiian-style poke tuna salad. $$-$$$ BW L D Daily TEMPO, 16 Cathedral Place, 547-0240. Newish fusion place specializes in healthful American fare with a Latin flair. $$ BW TO L D Tue.-Sun.

ST. JOHNS TOWN CENTER

MOXIE KITCHEN + COCKTAILS, 4972 Big Island Dr.,

CRUISERS GRILL, 5613 San Jose Blvd., Ste. 1, 737-2874. BOJ winner. See Beaches. $ BW K L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 1610 University Blvd. W., 448-2110. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily FUSION SUSHI, 1550 University Blvd. W., 636-8688. F Upscale sushi spot serves fresh sushi, sashimi, hibachi, teriyaki, kiatsu. $$ K L D Daily MOJO BAR-B-QUE, 1607 University Blvd. W., 732-7200. F BOJ winner. See Beaches. $$ FB K TO B L D Daily

SAN MARCO, SOUTHBANK, ST. NICHOLAS

BASIL THAI & SUSHI, 1004 Hendricks Ave., 674-0190. F Pad Thai, curries, sushi, served in a relaxing environment. Dine indoors or on the patio. $$ FB L D Mon.-Sat. THE GROTTO WINE & TAPAS BAR, 2012 San Marco Blvd., 398-0726. F Varied tapas menu of artisanal cheese plates, empanadas, bruschettas, homestyle cheesecake. 60+ wines by the glass. $$$ BW Tue.-Sun. LA NOPALERA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1631 Hendricks Ave., 399-1768. F See Mandarin. $$ FB K TO L D Daily MATTHEW’S, 2107 Hendricks Ave., 396-9922. Matthew Medure’s flagship. Fine dining, European-style atmosphere. Artfully presented cuisine, small plates, extensive martini/ wine lists. Reservations. $$$$ FB D Mon.-Sat. METRO DINER, 3302 Hendricks Ave., 398-3701. F BOJ winner. Original upscale diner in a historic 1930s-era building. Meatloaf, chicken pot pie, homemade soups. $$ B R L Daily PIZZA PALACE 1959 San Marco Blvd., 399-8815. F See Baymeadows. $$ BW TO L D Daily

SOUTHSIDE

360° GRILLE, LATITUDE 30, 10370 Philips Hwy., 3655555. F Seafood, steaks, burgers, chicken, sandwiches, pizza. Dine inside, on patio. $$ FB TO L D Daily ALHAMBRA THEATRE & DINING, 12000 Beach Blvd., 641-1212. Longest-running dinner theater. Executive Chef DeJuan Roy’s menus coordinated with stage productions. Reservations suggested. $$ FB D Tue.-Sun. CASA MARIA, 14965 Old St. Augustine Rd., 619-8186. F See Beaches. $ FB K L D Daily DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 10750 Atlantic Blvd., 619-0954. BOJ winner. See Northside. $ FB K TO L D Daily THE DIM SUM ROOM, 9041 Southside Blvd., Ste. 138D, 363-9888. Dim sum favorites: shrimp dumplings, beef tripe, sesame ball; plus traditional Hong Kong noodles and barbecue. $ FB K L D Daily. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 3611 St. Johns Bluff S., 641-6499. 4479 Deerwood Lake Pkwy., 425-4060. F See Orange Park. BOJ winner. $ K TO B L D Daily MANGIA! ITALIAN BISTRO & BAR, 3210 St. Johns Bluff Rd. S., 551-3061. F Chef/owner Tonino DiBella offers fine dining – fresh seafood, veal, steaks, New York-style pizza, desserts. Happy hour Mon.-Sat. Patio. $$$ FB K TO L D Mon.-Sat. MELLOW MUSHROOM PIZZA BAKERS, 9734 Deer Lake Ct., Ste. 1, 997-1955. F See Beaches. Bite Club certified. BOJ winner. $ BW K TO L D Daily SEVEN BRIDGES GRILLE & BREWERY, 9735 Gate Pkwy. N., 997-1999. F Local seafood, steaks, pizzas. Brewer Aaron Nesbit handcrafts award-winning freshly brewed ales and lagers. Inside, outdoors. $$ FB K TO L D Daily TAVERNA YAMAS, 9753 Deer Lake Court, 854-0426. F Bite Club certified. BOJ winner. Char-broiled kabobs, seafood, wines, desserts. Belly dancing. $$ FB K L D Daily WATAMI BUFFET, 9041 Southside Blvd., Ste. 138D, 363-9888. All-you can-eat sushi, plus choice of two items from teppanyaki grill. $ FB K L D Daily. WORLD OF BEER, 9700 Deer Lake Court, Ste. 1, 551-5929. F Apps and bar food: German pretzels, hummus, pickle chips, flatbreads. Craft drafts from Germany, Cali, Florida (Bold City brews), Ireland, Belgium. $$ BW L D Daily

SPRINGFIELD, NORTHSIDE

DICK’S WINGS & GRILL, 12400 Yellow Bluff Rd., Ste. 101, 619-9828. F BOJ winner. NASCAR-themed spot has 365 kinds of wings, half-pound burgers, ribs. $ FB K TO L D Daily HOLA MEXICAN RESTAURANT, 1001 N. Main St., 356-3100. F Fresh Mexican fare: fajitas, burritos, enchiladas, daily specials. Happy hour daily; sangria. $ BW K TO L D Mon.-Sat. LARRY’S GIANT SUBS, 12001 Lem Turner, 764-9999. See Orange Park. $ K TO B L D Daily SAVANNAH BISTRO, 14670 Duval Rd., 741-4404. F Low Country Southern fare, taste of Mediterranean and French. Crowne Plaza Airport. Crab cakes, New York strip, she crab soup, mahi mahi. Rainforest Lounge. $$$ FB K B L D Daily.


The Mustard Seed Cafe Located inside Nassau Health Foods, The Mustard Seed is Amelia Island’s only organic eatery and juice bar, with an extensive, eclectic menu featuring vegetarian and vegan items. Daily specials include local seafood, free-range chicken and fresh organic produce. Salads, wraps, sandwiches and soups are available — all prepared with our staff’s impeccable style. Popular items are chicken or veggie quesadillas, grilled mahi, or salmon over mixed greens and tuna melt with Swiss cheese and tomato. Open for breakfast and lunch, 8 a.m.-3 p.m. Mon.Sat. nassauhealthfoods.net

833 T.J. Courson Road 904-277-3141

Lulu’s at The Thompson House Lulu’s owners, Brian and Melanie Grimley, offer an innovative lunch menu, including po’boys, salads and seafood “little plates” served in the gardens of the historic Thompson House. Dinner features fresh local seafood (Fernandina shrimp is the focus every Thursday), and nightly specials. An extensive wine list and beer are available. Open for lunch and dinner Tue.-Sat., brunch on Sun. Reservations are recommended.

11 S. Seventh Street 904-432-8394

PLAE Restaurant & Lounge Located in the Spa & Shops at Amelia Island Plantation, PLAE serves bistro-style cuisine. The full bar lounge at PLAE has become an instant classic, with artistic décor and live entertainment nightly. Now you can PLAE during the day, too! Open for lunch Tue.-Sat. 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. Open at 5:30 p.m. for dinner daily; reservations accepted.

80 Amelia Village Cir. 904-277-2132

Moon River Pizza

Cafe Karibo Homemade sandwiches, salads and soups are served in a relaxed atmosphere in this charming building in the historic district. Delicious fresh fish specials and theme nights (Pad Thai and curry), plus vegetarian dishes, are also featured. Karibrew Brew Pub & Grub — the only one on the island — offers on-site beers and great burgers and sandwiches.

27 N. Third Street 904-277-5269

29 South Eats This chic, neighborhood bistro has it all — great ambience, fantastic food, an extensive wine list and reasonable prices. The eclectic menu offers regional cuisine with a modern whimsical twist and Chef Scotty Schwartz won Best Chef in Folio Weekly’s 2007 Best of Jax readers poll. Open for lunch Tues.-Sat., 11:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m., for dinner 5:30-9:30 p.m. Mon.-Thur., till 10 p.m. Fri. and Sat. Brunch is 10 a.m.-2 p.m. Sun. 29southrestaurant.com.

29 S. Third Street 904-277-7919

Brett’s Waterway Café Overlooking Fernandina Harbor Marina, Brett’s offers an upscale atmosphere with outstanding food. The extensive luncheon and dinner menus feature daily specials, fresh Florida seafood, chicken and aged beef. Cocktails, beer and wine. Casual resort wear. Open at 11:30 a.m. daily.

Fernandina Harbor Marina at the foot of Centre Street 904-261-2660

T-Ray’s Burger Station

Moon River Pizza treats customers like family. Cooked in a brick oven, the pizza is custom-made by the slice (or, of course, by the pie). Set up like an Atlanta-style pizza joint, Moon River also offers an eclectic selection of wine and beers. Open for lunch and dinner Mon.-Sat. Dine in or take it with you.

T-Ray’s offers a variety of breakfast and lunch items. In addition to an outstanding breakfast menu, you’ll find some of the best burgers you’ve ever put in your mouth. The Burger Station offers a grilled portabello mushroom burger, grilled or fried chicken salad and much more. The spot where locals grab a bite and go! Now serving beer & wine. Open Mon.-Fri. 7 a.m.-2:30 p.m., Sat. 8 a.m.-1 p.m. Closed Sundays.

925 S. 14th Street 904-321-3400

202 S. Eighth Street 904-261-6310

Ciao Italian Bistro You’ll find this charming Italian Bistro located in the heart of Amelia Island’s Historic District. Whether dining indoors or outside on our covered patio, your experience will be a memorable one. Choose from a fantastic menu filled with authentic homemade Italian dishes and a wine list that will leave your palate pleased. Contact us for reservations or catering needs. Open Sun.-Thurs. at 5 p.m., Fri. and Sat. at 11:30 a.m.

302 Centre Street 904-206-4311

Sliders Seaside Grill Oceanfront dining at its finest. Award-winning crab cakes, fresh daily seafood specials and homemade desserts. Sliders has Amelia Island’s only waterfront Tiki Bar, as well as a children’s playground and live music every weekend. The dining experience is complete with brand-new second-story banquet facilities, bar and verandah. Open at 11 a.m. daily Mon.-Fri. Make Sliders Seaside Grill your place to be for friends and family, entertainment and the best food on the East Coast. Call for your next special event.

1998 S. Fletcher Ave. 904-277-6652

Jack & Diane’s

The locals’ favorite hangout! Dine inside or on the patio of this cozy, renovated 1887 shotgun home in historic downtown Fernandina. From the crab & shrimp omelet to the steak & tomato pie, “The tastiest spot on Centre” offers food with attitude and unexpected flair. Live music elevates your dining experience to a new level. Come for breakfast, stay for dinner! You’ll love every bite! 708 Centre Street 904-321-1444

David’s Restaurant & Lounge Located in the Historic District, David’s is a place to have a dining experience, not just dinner. Offering the freshest seafood from around the world and serving only the finest prime aged meats. Dover sole, Chilean sea bass, soft shell crab & nightly fresh fish special. Filet Oscar, rack of lamb & and our signature 16oz grilled-to-perfection ribeye always available. Add foie gras or a Maine lobster tail to any entrée. Elegant but chic atmosphere. Bar & lounge with live music and complimentary valet parking on Fri. & Sat. nights. Private dining offered up to 12 guests in our Wine Room. Private parties up to 50. Wine Spectator rated. Lounge open 5 p.m.: open 6 p.m. for dinner, nightly. Reservations highly recommended. AmeliaIslandDavids.com

802 Ash Street 904-310-6049

Amelia Island is 13 miles of unspoiled beaches, quaint shops, antique treasures and superb dining in a 50-block historic district less than one hour north of Jacksonville JUNE 4-10, 2014 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | 43


ASTROLOGY

GRAINS OF SAND, LEONARD COHEN & BUNNY RABBITS ATTENTION, HOPEFUL ISU WRITERS: The word limit for ISU notices is now 40 words ONLY. NO ISU submissions with more than 40 words will be accepted. Please keep messages short & sweet. Count before you submit! Thanks! GORGEOUS GROCERY SHOPPER Standout even in Publix. Blue jeans, black top, red hair. Carrying yourself like a princess. Infatuated still, but probably nothing compared to the possibility of meeting you. Looked forward to passing you in the aisles. When: Sat., May 31. Where: Publix Lakewood. #1371-0604 STUNNING CHICK Me: Handsome Latino buying DVDs, gray South Pole shirt, black shorts, speechless when ISU. You: Sexy chick, long black-and-white dress, getting iPhone or something upgrade, at counter. Can we meet, chat? Hope to hear from you soon. When: 2 p.m. May 31. Where: San Jose Radio Shack. #1370-0604 SURFER NURSE WORKS 3 DAYS/WEEK ISU two mornings; pier dawn patrol. Wanted you to know how much I enjoyed your company. Hope I see you before I leave for Michigan. Like to ask you to coffee, breakfast. Perhaps surf safari to Poles? Enjoy the ride! When: May 25. Where: Jax Beach Pier. #1369-0604 TRULIA WHAT A HUNK! You: Shirtless, by your truck in front of your house, on Trulia.com. Me: Heart m watching from across the street. WOW! Wish u would buy me a hamburger and a tea! When: May 15. Where: Arlington. #1368-0604 HE TALKED FIRST Wanted to speak with you when ISU in weird chef pants, pizza night. Your best friend talked first. Two years later, one broken engagement; still wonder. Really embarrassed myself with email, didn’t I? Here I go again. When: 2012. Where: Breakthroughs San Jose. #1367-0604 HATED CIDERS, LIKED YOUR SMILE You: Serving SweetWaters. Me: Green-eyed brunette drinking them. Met three times; I blushed in Fans & Stoves. ISU again same day, said hello. You said you were creeping. We exchanged names; didn’t ask numbers. When: May 17. Where: Eco-Fest. #1366-0528 ROGUE MEN MUSCLE HOTTIE Young Adonis-like dude in corner of Aardwolf with friends. Tight T-shirt, dark eyes, biceps. U guys were rockin’ but I caught you lookin’. Me: Tall guy, Jags cap. Hit me up or meet at next Rogue Men. When: May 16. Where: Aardwolf/ Rogue Men. #1365-0521 STATUESQUE BEAUTY WAITING IN MIND In pharmacy RX line. You: Tall, gorgeous dress, flats. I asked if you ever wore heels. Beautiful laugh. Me: Not as tall, looking scruffy off work; clean up well. You left, said you’d be back. Date slightly shorter? I’m your RX. When: May 14. Where: CVS Blanding Blvd. #1364-0521 HOT-N-READY BABY You: Tall, bald, sexy; getting in white Mercedes. I became enthralled when I saw your 10 pizzas. Love a man who can eat. I’ll be waiting in a leopard shirt every Wed. 8 p.m. Forget pizzas; get Hot-N-Ready with me. When: May 14. Where: Little Caesars Pizza, Southside. #1363-0521 BEAUTIFUL BLONDE AT APPLEBEE’S ISU with fellow workers. I was at bar watching TVs above you, with my daughter and son-in-law. Our eyes met; I felt the attraction. I want to meet the lady who made my heart jump! When: May 13. Where: Applebee’s, Old St. Augustine Rd. #1362-0521 I SAW U Connection Made!

SPACED-OUT CUT-UP SMURF SHIRT, RED CONVERSE ISU dancing your dance, apologized for male gender, took glasses off to dance. You: Retirement home server near Sawgrass; discussed labyrinth of suffering. Told me to wait; never returned. Me: Vest, purple shirt. When: May 9. Where: The Loft, Riverside. #1361-0514 TATTOOS & TRUCK You: Hot, tattooed boy, black truck. Me: Red lips, silver Rodeo. Drove side-by-side, JTB to Riverside. I turned on

44 | FOLIOWEEKLY.com | JUNE 4-10, 2014

Park, lost you. Should’ve rolled my window down when you said hi at the light. Go for a drive? When: May 6. Where: JTB to I-95N. #1360-0514 I BOUGHT YOU A BUD LIGHT Met at the bar, you had a nice smile. Asked if I was in military, we complained about slow service. Told you I was married. Hope you’re interested in just friends. Let me know. When: May 3. Where: Acapulco’s. #1359-0514 HOT BUTCH GIRL Hey, black Incahoots cut-off shirt, name R_, #27 on back. Buff arms, legs; couldn’t take my eyes off u on rowing machine! You can row my boat anytime! ;-) Sincerely, Hot brunette femme, hot pink tank top. When: May 3. Where: Riverside YMCA. #1358-0507 MEET FOR BREAKFAST AGAIN? You: Detective, JSO Organized Crime Unit, PDDS Division. Me: Work from home for IT company. We sat beside each other at breakfast. Chatted; hoped you’d ask me out; you didn’t. Single? Meet for breakfast again? Get in touch. When: May 3. Where: U.S. 17 Waffle House. #1357-0507 CUTIE WITH TEA & HOOKAH Amsterdam, Tuesday 9-11 p.m. You: Zip-up hoodie, alone. We made eye contact. Me: Black dress. I went to bathroom; my friend said you’d leave number. So excited; you left suddenly without saying anything, before I said hey. Went outside, you were gone! Meet again? :) When: March 30. Where: Amsterdam Hookah Lounge. #1356-0507 HOT BRUNETTE, COLORFUL TOP, WHITE SHORTS You: Gorgeous brunette at Salty Pelican Saturday night; with a friend. We shared a moment; we both felt it. Hope you read this, hope to hear back. You’re one in a million – beautiful green-eyed brunette. When: April 26. Where: Salty Pelican, Fernandina. #1355-0507 BEAUTIFUL POKER PLAYER @ PLAYERS ISU after poker Wednesday, with redheaded friend. Your beautiful blonde hair caught my eye. You: White top. Me: Black blue-striped golf shirt, admired you from bar. You hugged girls; want one of those hugs! When: April 23. Where: Players Grill. #1354-0430 YOU HELD DOOR OPEN ... Me: Tall brunette, blue shirt. You: Brown hair, beautiful eyes, burgundy shirt/jeans, black Chevy SUV or Escalade. I think you went in Walmart after I did. I looked for you; love to meet again. When: April 21. Where: Walmart Gas Station Philips Hwy. #1353-0430 ISU LOOKING AT ISU! At Mandarin Library; reading the back of Folio Weekly, laughing. Assumed it was ISU. You: Cute brunette, wonderful laugh. Me: Tall muscular brunette, checking DVDs out. Love to know the person behind the laughter. Where: Mandarin Library. When: April 16. #1352-0423 WAS IT ALTERNATOR? You: Inadvertently at my moving sale, Atlantic Beach, Sunday a.m., working on buddy’s wife’s Jeep. You looked sexy under the hood working with your hands; my morning was more exciting! Bummed you never returned. Take me for a ride in your Altima before it sells? I’ll handle the heat! Where: Eakin & Sneed Law Firm, AB. When: April 13. #1351-0423 MUDVILLE GRILLE TRIVIA NIGHT You: At bar, waiting for (first?) date. My buddy and I were woefully undermanned for trivia; you jumped in to help! Me: Blue-shirted guy with onion ring fetish. I like how we connected; you were busy when your date came. Did it work out? :-) Where: Mudville Trivia. When: April 4. #1350-0423 I SAW MY FUTURE ISU hanging at a friend’s. Looking into your eyes, there was something about you; you felt it, too. You: Blue jeans, black top; I remember smile most. Your voice was a sign from heaven; my angel was there for me to love. When: 2011. Where: Captiva Bluff. #1349-0416

ARIES (March 21-April 19): “We are born with whirlwinds, forest fires, and comets inside us,” writes novelist Robert R. McCammon. “We are born able to sing to birds and read the clouds and see our destiny in grains of sand. But then we get the magic educated right out of our souls. We get it churched out, spanked out, washed out and combed out. We get put on the straight and narrow path and told to be responsible.” That’s the bad news. So what’s the good news? The next 12 months offer great opportunities to re-magic yourself. You soon catch wind of the first invitation.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): My favorite bridge in the world is the Golden Gate Bridge. I’ve driven on it hundreds of times over San Francisco Bay, and it’s never let me down. I’ve always gone from one side to the other with no problem. It uplifts me with its grandeur and beauty. What’s your most beloved bridge? Make it your lucky charm, your magical symbol, in the next few weeks. The next chapter of your life story requires a major crossing. You will traverse a great divide. Having your favorite bridge as a shining beacon in your imagination will inspire strength and courage.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20): “When given a choice between owning an object and having an experience,” says art critic Holland Cotter, “I always choose the experience.” He prefers to spend his money on adventures that transform his sense of self and his understanding of the world. Take that approach in the weeks ahead. The most valuable “possessions” you can acquire are the lessons you learn, skills you hone and relationships you ripen.

SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): U2’s Bono called Leonard Cohen’s song “Hallelujah” “the most perfect song in the world.” It’s mournful and triumphant, despairing and uplifting. It’s a riddle that improbably offers cathartic release. More than 300 singers have covered it; it’s even been the subject of books. And yet it was tough for Cohen to compose. He wrote more than 80 verses before choosing the few for the final version; in one famous session, he banged his head on the floor to stimulate his creative flow. “To find that urgent song,” he said, took “a lot of work and a lot of sweat.” I nominate “Hallelujah” as one of your sacred symbols for the next 12 months. From strenuous effort come masterful creations.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20): In Marcel Proust’s novel Swann’s Way, the narrator tells how profoundly he’s been inspired by an older writer, Bergotte: “Each time he talked about something whose beauty had until then been hidden from me, about pine forests, about hail, about Notre-Dame Cathedral … with one image he would make that beauty explode into me.” In the days ahead, I suspect a great deal of beauty explodes into you, because you’re more receptive than usual to being delighted and enchanted. The triggers could be anything: exciting people, eavesdropped conversations, good books, surprising music – what else? CANCER (June 21-July 22): A Haitian proverb goes, “Little horses cannot carry great riders.” Meditate on its meaning for your life. Four possible interpretations: 1. Are you a “little horse” trying to carry a “great rider” who’s too much for you? 2. Are you a little horse that could grow into a bigger, stronger horse worthy of a great rider? 3. Are you a “great rider” in need of a horse that’s big and strong enough to serve your big, strong ambitions? 4. Would you like to be a “great rider,” but can’t be one while you have a horse too small and weak? LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): Declare victory, even if victory isn’t quite won – even if your success is imperfect and still a bit messy around the edges. Raise your arms in elated triumph and shout, “I am the purified champion! I am the righteous conqueror! I have outsmarted adversaries and outmaneuvered obstacles, and I’m ready to claim my rightful rewards!” Do this even if you’re not 100 percent confident, even if there’s still some scraping or clawing ahead. Celebrate your growing mastery. Congratulate yourself on how far you’ve come. In this way, you summon what’s needed to complete the mission and achieve final, total victory. VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Give special attention to what lasts the longest. Devote less energy to transitory pleasures and short-term hopes. Turn away from small obsessions that demand far too much energy. Withdraw from seemingly pressing concerns that soon start to fade; they really aren’t important. Instead, devote your love and intelligence to joys and dilemmas to animate your life well into the future. Express reverence and care for the mysteries that teach you for years to come.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Here are some possible breakthroughs in the months ahead: What’s good about you won’t interfere with what’s potentially great about you; cooperate and boost it. Your past accomplishments won’t hold back your progress; you won’t be tempted to rely on them at the expense of future accomplishments. The brave ideas that motivated so well won’t devolve into staid old dogmas; you’ll either renew and reinvigorate them or move on to a new set of brave ideas. CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): If you’re in even moderate alignment with cosmic rhythms in the next 12 months, you’ll be a connoisseur and master of recycling, metaphorically speaking. I hope you reanimate worn-out inspirations and convert faded dreams into shiny new fantasies. You’ll find ways to revive off-track alliances. A once-vibrant shtick or trick that lost its cool could be saved from history’s ash heap and made a fresh, hot asset. Gear up for entertaining resurrections. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Wish I could say your power animal this month is eagle, dolphin or panther. Having a glamorous creature like that as an ally might boost your confidence and charisma. To be paired with one of them may even activate your animal intelligence’s dormant reserves. But that’s not what astrological omens suggest. In fact, your power animal this June is the bunny rabbit. There’s no shame in it. On the contrary, be charmed and appreciative. It signifies you’ll be fertile, fast, a bit tricky and very cute. (To read about the rabbit-as-trickster mythology, go to tinyurl.com/rabbittrickster.) PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Buddhist meditation teacher Chogyam Trungpa said one of the best ways to become fearless is to cultivate tenderness. As you expand your heart’s capacity to feel compassionate affection for the world, you have less and less to fear. That’s the opposite of conventional wisdom, which says you become brave by toughening up, reinforcing your psychic armor. Of all the signs of the zodiac, Pisceans are best set up to benefit from Trungpa’s method – now even more than usual. Rob Brezsny freewillastrology@freewillastrology.com


NEWS OF THE WEIRD WHAT’S IN A NAME?

Vanellope, Rydder, Jceion and Burklee head the new annual list of most common baby names on the Social Security Administration register of first-time-appearing names. There were 63 Vanellopes (girls), but only 10 each for Rydder and Jceion, the most popular debut names for boys. Other notables were Hatch (eight times) and Psalms (seven). And among finalists in April’s “Name of the Year” contest sponsored by Deadspin.com were the actual monikers Curvaceous Bass, (Dr.) Eve Gruntfest and Chillie Poon … and the winner: Shamus Beaglehole.

EDITORIAL PRIVILEGE

To celebrate the 25th anniversary of NOTW weekly distribution by Universal Uclick, Chuck Shepherd recalls a few of his favorite stories (among the more than 25,000 covered). 1989 In the mid-’80s, convicted South Carolina murderer Michael Godwin won an appeal to avoid the electric chair and serve only a life sentence. In March, while sitting naked on a metal prison toilet, attempting to fix a TV set, the 28-year-old Godwin bit into a wire and was electrocuted. 1991 Dee Dee Jonrowe, leading the Beargrease Sled Dog Marathon in January in northern Minnesota, took a wrong turn, going 300 yards before seeing her error, which cost her team only a few minutes, but stopping to calculate her location allowed the dogs an unsupervised rest, and by the time she was ready to go, two of her dogs had begun to copulate. She was forced to wait 25 minutes and lost the lead. 1991 In March, Florence Schreiber Powers, 44, a Ewing, New Jersey, administrative judge on trial for shoplifting two watches, called her shrink to testify that Powers was under stress at the time of the incidents. The doc said Powers was unaware of her actions “from one minute to the next,” for 20 reasons: recent car accident, traffic ticket, a new car, overwork, husband’s kidney stones, husband’s asthma (and breathing machine in the bedroom), hot flashes, an “ungodly” vaginal itch, bad rash, fear of breast/anal cancer, fear of dental surgery, son’s need for an asthma breathing machine, sick mother and aunt, organizing her parents’ 50th wedding anniversary, cooking Thanksgiving dinner for 20, buying 200 Christmas/Hanukah gifts, selling her house without an agent, lawsuit against wallpaper cleaners, buying furniture that had to be returned, and a toilet constantly running. She was convicted anyway. 1991 and before Gary Arthur Medrow, 47, was arrested in March in Milwaukee (the latest of then-30-plus arrests in 23 years) for causing mischief by calling a woman, trying to persuade her to physically pick up another person and carry her around a room. In this incident, after repeatedly calling, he told her another woman had been impersonating her, had been in an accident, and had been seen carrying someone away (and that Medrow needed evidence that she could or could not do that). He’d previously talked cheerleaders, motel workers and business executives into lifting and carrying. 1992 A 38-year-old man, unidentified in reports, was hospitalized in Princeton, W.Va., in October with gunshot wounds. He’d been drinking beer and cleaning three guns — and accidentally shot himself with each one. He said the first shot didn’t hurt, the second “stung a little,” and the third “really hurt,” so he called for help. 1994 In Toronto in March, Sajid Rhatti, 23, and his 20-year-old wife brawled over whether Katey Sagal, who played Peg Bundy on “Married With Children,” is prettier than Christina Applegate, who plays her daughter. First, wifey slashed Rhatti in the groin with a wine bottle, but she dressed his wounds and they sat down again to watch another episode. Moments later, the brawl erupted again, and Rhatti, who suffered

a broken arm and shoulder, stabbed his wife in the chest, back and legs before they begged neighbors to call an ambulance. 1995 From Riley County police blotter in Kansas State University’s newspaper, Sept. 2: 1:33 p.m., disturbance involving Marcus Miles; 2:14 p.m. (different address), “unwanted subject” (police jargon for acquaintance who wouldn’t leave) in the home, Marcus Miles told to leave; 4:08 p.m. (different address), Marcus Miles accused of harassment; 6:10 p.m., “unwanted subject” call against Marcus Miles. Nov. 14: 6:47 p.m., “unwanted subject” in the home, Marcus Miles told to leave; 7:36 p.m. (different address), “unwanted subject” call against Marcus Miles. Nov. 20: 2:05 a.m. (different address), “unwanted subject” charge against Marcus Miles; 2:55 a.m. (different address), disturbance involving Marcus Miles; 3:07 a.m. (different address), “unwanted subject” charge against Marcus Miles; 4:11 a.m. (different address), “unwanted subject” report made against Marcus Miles. 1996 A pre-trial hearing was set in Lamar, Missouri, on Joyce Lehr’s lawsuit against the county for injuries from a 1993 fall in the local high school’s icy, unplowed parking lot. The Carthage Press reported Lehr claimed damage to nearly every part of her body. According to her petition: “All the bones, organs, muscles, tendons, tissues, nerves, veins, arteries, ligaments ... discs, cartilages ... joints ... were fractured, broken, ruptured, punctured, compressed, dislocated, separated, bruised, contused, narrowed, abrased, lacerated, burned, cut, torn, wrenched, swollen, strained, sprained, inflamed and infected.” 1999 From a May police item in The Messenger (Madisonville, Ky.), on two trucks being driven oddly on a rural road: A man would drive a truck 100 yards, stop, walk back to a second truck, drive it 100 yards beyond the first truck, stop, walk to the first truck, drive it 100 yards beyond the second truck, and so on, into the night. He did it, he told cops, because his brother was passed out drunk in one of the trucks, and he was trying to drive both trucks home, at more or less the same time. Not surprisingly, a bloodalcohol test showed the driver was also impaired. 2002 The Lane brothers of New York, Mr. Winner Lane, 44, and Mr. Loser Lane, 41 (their real birth names), were profiled in a July Newsday report, made interesting by the fact that Loser is successful (a South Bronx police detective) and Winner is not (a history of petty crimes). A sister said she believes her parents selected “Winner” because their late father was a big baseball fan and chose “Loser” just to complete the pairing. 2004 The New York Times reported in February of a Washington, D.C., man whose love of music led him, in the ’60s, to meticulously hand-make and hand-paint facsimile record album covers of fantasized music, with imagined lyric sheets and liner notes (some even shrink-wrapped), and incredibly, to handmake cardboard facsimiles of actual grooved discs to put inside. “Mingering Mike,” whom a reporter and two hobbyists tracked down (he declined to be identified in print) also made real music, on tapes, using his and friends’ voices to simulate instruments. His 38 imagined “albums” were found at a flea market after Mike defaulted on storage fees; the hobbyists who found them said they were so exactingly done a major museum would show them. 1988 And finally, there was ol’ Hal Warden, the Tennessee 16-year-old who was married at 15 and granted a divorce from his wife, 13. Hal had previously been married at age 12 to a 14-yearold (and fathered children with both), but the first wife divorced Hal because, she told the judge, “He was acting like a 10-year-old.” Chuck Shepherd weirdnews@earthlink.net

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ACROSS Feet in a pound? Giraffe features Intelligence org. Band job Assortment First of a series Fairway choices “SNL” alum Gasteyer Singer after getting seasick? Reheat quickly Downed a sub, e.g. They see things Harper and Stan Yeas and nays Share again, as a joke Fearsome dino With 38 Across, some guy from another planet? See 36 Across Oodles Works on the street Bare minimum Cherbourg chum Let go Gulf of ___ For-rent listing Full-house indicator What members of the Three Stooges Fan Club call their secret greeting? Noted tax evader Flying start Day of the wk. Smash or switch addon Writer ___ Rogers St. Johns Result of the fruit truck never arriving at the senior center? Besmirch Full-grown filly Book-flap feature “As seen ___” Ex-Disney chief Michael Pasta-aisle product that says “Czech it out!” on the label? “Rules ___ rules” Jim who played Thurston Nose-in-the-air type 1

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DOWN Excuse Short piece of 54 Down music Tolstoy title word Charlie Chaplin’s son or half-brother Alter, as a pet Carpet feature Faux fat approved in 1996 Cracker Jack bonus Most musty Karaoke prop Libido symbol Turkey time: abbr. 6

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BACKPAGE EDITORIAL

SHOULD WE BURY JEA?

Burying power lines is an expensive, but beneficial, proposition

T

he neighborhoods of San Jose, San Marco, Riverside, Avondale, Fairfax, Ortega, Ortega Forest and Venetia were all built before 1968, when the Jacksonville Electric Authority started burying power lines. The results of this were that during the 2004 hurricane season, when we were impacted by four tropical storms, during Fay in 2008, and during Beryl in 2012, these areas were affected by power outages more than most parts of town. In September 2013, JEA’s Kris Rosenhauer wrote a white paper, “Overhead versus Underground Electric Distribution Systems.” This paper is very informational and very technical, so I’ll try to simplify the information to help everyone make an informed decision. There are a lot of numbers, which are needed to explain how much of JEA is underground. JEA has 423,748 customers. The service area is 900 square miles, meaning an average of 471 customers per square mile. The percentage of overhead lines is 46.7; underground lines, 53.3. The total miles overhead is 3,058; underground, 3,485. The report looks at the number of miles that would need to be placed underground. There are approximately 900 miles of feeder line. These lines impact all of us, and it may be fair for those of us who are currently underground to pay a portion of the cost. If these overhead distribution lines leading to an underground distribution area are knocked out, the power still goes out. These lines that serve all of us are the most expensive to convert, at $1.493 million per mile. The next type of power line is the three-phase lateral (distribution) line. This is another grouping of lines that can impact us all. There are only 300 miles of these, and the cost of converting them is $919,000 per mile. Finally, there are 1,800 miles of single-phase distribution lines, which impact only those on the lines. They’re also the least expensive to convert, at $358,000 per mile. (All of these estimates include pole removal.) This brings the total conversion cost to $2.264 billion. Mike Brost, JEA’s vice president and general manager, noted a few concerns. Brost said, “JEA would like to see more of its system underground — it just comes to finding a funding source for the significant capital investment required.

JEA customers living in areas that already have underground lines have essentially paid for the more expensive system; therefore, many will likely not want to help pay for additional underground conversion in other areas of town. If Jacksonville wants to attract industry and large commercial offices to town, our utility rates must remain competitive.” If we paid for the project with revenue bonds at a debt service (principal and interest) of 7.04 percent, the debt service fee would be approximately $168 million per year. By spreading out the project over 14 years, we would pay only capital costs and save $2.1 billion by not issuing bonds. Dividing $168 million by an estimated 12.063 million megawatt hours (MWh) in sales, a $14 per MWh surcharge to pay for conversion might prevent JEA from being competitive. (Note: The numbers are rounded.) This point is well-taken, as the cost of 1,250 kilowatt hours (Kwh) would increase from $147.89 (based on JEA’s 2013 rate comparison chart) to $161.89 by paying to have JEA’s

flood-prone areas, though most areas don’t flood except in a storm surge. The question is, against what type of surge do we need to protect the lines? During the 2004 storms, there was flooding in a few low-lying areas within San Marco and Riverside. The last hurricane to cause a severe surge was Dora in 1964, 50 years ago. That surge reached five feet Downtown, according to George Winterling’s Weather Guide. Looking at the city of Jacksonville flood map, less than 20 percent of the surface in Duval County is in Category 1 or 2 evacuation zones. This is less than the 50-plus percent of JEA’s service knocked out by Hurricane Frances. There are considerably more flood-prone areas in Category 3 and above; however, since Cowford was founded in 1822, there’s no record of Category 3 conditions in this city. A Category 3 storm like Ivan can damage both overhead and underground systems. This area will be hit by a storm like this less than once every 150 to 200 years. We’re overdue for a hurricane of Ivan’s strength; however, 130-mph winds, combined with rain, would have blown out or damaged most overhead transformers on JEA’s system and likely caused considerable pole damage. Brost brought up another advantage to an underground system. With an overhead system, the transformer is located 30 or more feet in the air. In an underground system, the transformer is on a pad well below the treetops and even the rooftops. This makes the ground-based transformer a less-likely lightning target. We haven’t had a direct hit from a hurricane with Category 1 or above winds in the past half-century. Over this time, we’ve had thousands of thunderstorms, hundreds of tornados, over a dozen occurrences of tropical storm conditions and many floods that impacted localized areas. Damaging floods are infrequent and usually localized when they do occur. JEA should provide the public with the facts and allow the citizens of Jacksonville to decide about burying JEA for all of its customers, or individual neighborhoods should decide among themselves, with Jacksonville as a whole deciding whether or not to bury the 1,200 miles of three-phase lines that service all of us.

“JEA would like to see more of its system underground. It just comes down to finding a funding source.” distribution system 100 percent underground in 14 years. This could be considered unfair to current rate-payers, since it’s a 9.5 percent increase. Such an increase could drive out industrial plants like the Gerdau Long Steel Plant in Baldwin. We have to be careful in weighing the convenience versus the cost. Currently, there’s a program in effect in which a specific community can have JEA estimate the cost of burying the power lines and, after garnering 75 percent support, all residents — even those who disagreed — will be required to participate. The City Council must approve a special assessment tax for either 10 or 20 years. This fee is added to the participants’ property tax assessments. While the use of underground lines prevents most wind damage and is more dependable than overhead lines, this can change when it floods. Floods can damage the ground-based transformers and knock out power. Jacksonville has some

Bruce A. Fouraker mail@folioweekly.com

Folio Weekly welcomes Backpage Editorial submissions. Essays should be no more than 1,200 words and on a topic of local interest or concern. Email your Backpage to mail@folioweekly.com. Opinions expressed on the Backpage are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of the editors or management of Folio Weekly.

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